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Home , Agape, Storge

The Four Kinds of Activity Instructions

Activity 1

Preparation:

Cut up the texts on each of the four kinds of love

Photocopy them onto different colour paper

Set Up & Instructions

 Put the students in groups of 5 or 6  Tell the students their aim is to make notes on their table for each kind of love, using the information on the texts. Explain that the sub-box under each table category is for writing in examples of that kind of love.  The students have 4 minutes per text, then shout “swap”: the students must put their text down and pick up another one.  After 16 mins, give the students a few additional minutes to check their info with their partners, and complete anything missing.

Feedback the answers.

Activity 2 Summing Activity

Explain how the love of a for their can consist of all four kinds of love.

Activity 3/ Plenary

Nominate students from the class to choose a letter from the alphabet, name an adjective starting with that letter that would describe one kind of love. Encourage the students to explain their choice.

Eg R - Romantic, C - caring

Sacred Heart High School/mrumian 2009 The Four Kinds of Love

Storge , or “” can be shown to people of objects. Towards people, is being fond of someone because we like and have got used to having them around. Eg a member, or neighbour we have grown up with. Towards objects, storge is the loving satisfaction of having a good meal, or a fit and healthy body. It is the most natural kind of love: we experience it easily,

and don’t stop to think about whether we should in fact be feeling loving towards these people or things – we love them because it is somehow “built-in” to us to love them. Storge love is biological, and therefore is very important for survival: for example a ‘s love for her child ensures that the child receives all it needs to grow up well, and the child’s storge love for its caregivers ensures it remains bonded to them. Storge love is often based on the need for another person.

One strength of this kind of love is that it doesn’t discriminate between people and can love everybody. You don’t need to admire or have anything in common with someone to “storge” love them – you just like them for being around. This strength, can also be a weakness, as some people may come to expect this kind of love towards themselves whether or not they deserve it– eg a beating his may continue to expect such love from her.

Philia

Philia, or , is a strong bond between people who share a common interest or value. Philia is the least biological of the “natural” . Philia love can be for friends, family members or even activities or pets, because they represent values that we are drawn to. Philia love only exists if there is something for the friendship to be "about".

Philia love can therefore be earned or lost, depending on what happens in that relationship eg if your friend loses interest in the things you used to have in common, or changes their character.

Philia are by nature exclusive: when two or more people decide to be friends about something, it is because they are choosing not to be friends with other people who have different values. Friendships can be a kind of resistance movement against things you don’t like or are afraid of. And in that sense, friendship can be evil, because friends can choose to be friends for cowardly or selfish reasons, doing bad things in the name of their friendship group, and caring nothing for “outsiders”.

The Ancient thought that Philia was the highest kind of love, because it was based on , and could do great things for civilisations: friends working together on something they both cared about, is the reason many advances in society ever took place.

Sacred Heart High School/mrumianm.rumian/ 2009

Eros-love is any love that is passionate, more passionate than philia-love. It doesn’t have to be sexual, but the lover’s desire for each other is also often physical. Eros itself is different from sexual desire, because people who only desire each other sexually lose interest in that person once they have satisfied their desire. But Eros cares more about the person, than the sexual pleasure it can get from them. When Eros is present, we simply want this person and no other, valuing them above anyone or anything else. God loves us in this way.

With Eros, lovers talk a lot about their relationship, each other and how they affect each other. They are so taken up with their love, and with loving, that they never want it to end, living wrapped up in their all the time. Eros can put up with a lot of hardship and suffering on behalf of the beloved, giving up family, friends, career, health, wealth, power and honour, yet count it all as nothing. Lovers may feel that they are above any normal kind of laws for behaviour, even to the point of disregarding social conventions and rules. Problems can arise in the relationship if this passion starts to disappear and they don’t know how to move on in their relationship.

Agape

Agape is Selfless Love. You think more about the other person, than you do about yourself. You love them, not because you can’t imagine life without them, or because you depend on them, or because you have so much in common and get on really well. You love them, because you have decided to. It is a decision that you make. Agape is loving someone enough to give them your money or your time. It is sacrificing your own good for someone else’s, simply because that is the good thing to do. You love them fis the love that is totally free of need or compulsion. It is loving someone their own good, not your own. Agape love can be shown to complete strangers, as well as to your nearest and dearest. It is simply love that is completely unselfish, giving of yourself to others regardless of whether they are worthy of your care and attention. This is also how God loves us, and how loved us, when He went to be crucified for us.

Without help from God, beings are incapable of loving in this way, because we are programmed to be selfish, to get some reward for our love – to satisfy a biological need, a sexual desire, or for the support a friendship can give. (storge, eros or philia). True agape is sacrificial and supernatural.

Sacred Heart High School/mrumianm.rumian/ 2009 4 kinds of Love... Storge Philia

Examples Examples

Eros Agape

Examples Examples

Sacred Heart High School/mrumian 2009