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The Appleton North NOCTILUCA Appleton, Wisconsin April Fools 2015 Vol the appleton north NOCTILUCA Appleton, Wisconsin April Fools 2015 Vol. XX Issue VIII 30 minute nap France trip re-routed to Oshkosh time added to By Erik Bakken schedule North students who regis- tered to travel to France re- By Fatima Ali ceived quite a surprise over Starting from next month, Spring Break. Instead of trav- Appleton North students and eling to Europe, flights were faculty included, will have a changed and the students end- 30 minute nap period at the ed up traveling to a less exotic end of 6th period, every sin- locale, Oshkosh. gle day. These 30 minutes “We were quite surprised will count for teaching min- when our plane touched down utes during the school day, so a mere 15 minutes after we one won’t even need to think took off,” said Kinan Abouz- about the horror of starting the elam, a North junior who trav- school day early, or ending the eled with other area French school day late. students. “Most of us were It’s just a typical Monday doubtful that we were already afternoon in Mr. Meixl’s 6th in Paris.” hour AP Psychology. The students were surprised North travelers were perplexed when they landed in what they thought was Paris, Almost all of the students to find that the foreigners were France. The city was in fact Oshkosh, Wisconsin. Photo illustration by Jack Pairin in class are diligently taking all fluent in English and over- notes while listening to Mr. power had gone out, because multitude of bars. “Despite the experiences on whelmingly supported the Meixl’s intriguing discus- we certainly couldn’t see the Anxious to get to bed before our trip being a lot less unfa- Green Bay Packers. sion about abnormal psychol- illuminated silhouette of the their morning bus trip to Swit- miliar than we expected, we After retrieving their lug- ogy. Eiffel Tower.” zerland, the students decided still had a lot of fun experienc- gage, the students and their However, the other hand- After searching for nearly that camping on the street was ing a foreign culture,” Abouz- teachers exited the airport at ful of students, specifically se- two hours for their hotel, stu- the best plan. elam said. “I just wish we had dusk to view the city of lights. niors Stuart Bultman and Chris dents and teachers were begin- “It was certainly a letdown,” been able to use our French Unfortunately, the experi- Cudnowski, are not paying ning to sense that something said Abby Schilling. “Our first more.” ence was not as all had hoped. attention at all. In fact, they was wrong. They noticed the night in Paris and we were al- Similar mix-ups have oc- “It was surprisingly dark,” happen to be experiencing fre- mysterious absence of the ready sleeping on the streets.” curred to North student travel- said Mrs. Stephanie Hooy- quent hypnagogic movements Seine and the omnipresent The rest of the trip proved ers in the past, with the 2008 man, an AASD French teacher while trying to fall asleep, and mimes smoking on street cor- to provide a sense of deja-vu Spain students ending up in who accompanied the students later they both fall into stage ners. for the student travelers, as fa- Iraq, and the 2013 France trip from North. “I’ve been to Par- two of the sleep cycle. Another thing that also sur- miliar landscapes gave way to ending up in Bhutan. is before, and it was certainly It’s true that these two prised the students was the recognizable monuments. different. I wondered if the men faintly resemble Sleep- ing Beauty and thus they must keep up with their “beauty New referendum offers students drones sleep”, but more importantly By Tye Swokowski are given time to write a pa- it’s important to note the fact A small but growing group per, are watching a film in that growing young teenag- of parents and educators, call- class, or their teacher is giving ers all need some time to re- ing themselves the Pushers a lecture, students are on their cuperate and take some time for Educational Electronics, Chromebooks, typing away.” to reorganize our intelligent is currently beginning the pro- In fact, the one problem brains. cess of proposing another ref- with the Chromebooks is that These 30 minutes of slum- erendum. Branching off of the students don’t always have ber count as learning minutes, technology referendum that them on their person, and especially since sleeping is brought us the Chromebooks, when they do they may or may technically a psychology les- this new referendum would not be charged. son altogether. According to provide every student attend- These drones are our solu- the American Psychology As- ing an AASD high school with tion to this problem. Every sociation, sleep is vital for ev- a personal drone. In the near future, students in the AASD high schools drone we wish to purchase has erybody, including teenagers. Many citizens were un- may be offered a personal drone as part of a new a spot to place your Chrome- Millions of people don’t get aware of this growing move- technology referendum. Photo from usa.gov book, that way you don’t have enough sleep, and as a result, ment, and we decided to ask sage or snap-a-whatever their dents will feel safer in school to carry it, and thus can’t for- they tend to make poor deci- them what they thought of friends for help on their as- as well, as the NSA will be get it at home. sions, get into accidents fre- drones in our schools. signments. I mean, honestly, just a few feet away, watching As for the charging prob- quently, and most importantly, One citizen, Michelle Mar- am I the only person who sees through the nearest drone.” lem, the drones also have a can’t pay attention during tino, thought that purchasing how much sense this makes?” Ed Cook, the president of spot for an additional battery, class, as stated in the scenario drones for our students wasn’t Another citizen, who PEE, says that “the Chrome- which we hope to purchase above. enough. wished to remain nameless, books were enormously ben- through another referendum So everyone, get your pil- “I think it’s really great. was enthusiastic about these eficial to our students. Yes, following the passing of the low pets and snuggies out, Like, honestly, I don’t think new electronics. some of our opposition says drones. This would allow the cause pretty soon everyone our students have enough “I’m really happy about that performance hasn’t im- drones to serve as a power so- will, or at least should, be electronics in their education. this. Ever since I found out that proved, but anybody can go lution as well.” having sweet dreams at the I mean, why aren’t we giving the government uses drones to into one of our schools and PEE thinks you should be end of 6th period every single them cell phones too? That watch our every move, I have see countless students on their able to vote on the referendum day. way they could call or mes- felt way safer. Now our stu- Chromebooks. Whether they in about a year. NEWS Appleton, Wisconsin April 2015 Volume XX Issue VIII Page 2 Either drugs, bullying or cockroaches on the rise News Briefs By Tye Swokowski and North freshman Julia Lammers “ Rodney thinks there might be more finds ‘the one’ According to sources, than one [problem Citing his “dreamy drugs, bullying, or cockroach smile” and “beautiful hair,” levels have been rising at on the rise]. We freshman Ashley Lou thinks North. However, we forgot could be dealing that her senior boyfriend is which one, and sources are with bullying the one she’ll marry. not that sure either. “He’s, like, so sweet, es- “We know that kids have druggies, high been using more drugs, bully- cockroaches, or pecially when he pretends to ing each other more or there cockroaches being not know who I am when we pass each other in the hall. are more cockroach sightings, bullied.” but we’re not exactly clear on It’s so funny!” Lou said. which one it is. We can say stated that these reports are When the aforementioned without a doubt however, that nothing but “codswallop.” boyfriend was reached for one or more of these three are Still, there are countless comment, he was unsure on the rise,” said Principal A survey conducted by North’s guidance department rumors making their rounds, who Ashley Lou was. James Huggins. asked students what problems affected them. The with a large number of stu- Lou said they have only Administration have re- answers were inconclusive. Graphic by Erik Bakken dents being under the impres- been dating a week or two, ported increases of either one is increasing,” said expert not be separate entities, and sion that cockroaches were but she is sure their relation- drugs, bullying or cockroach- Joe Glow. may be causing even larger smuggled into the school to ship will never end. es up to 50 percent. No solutions have been problems. enforce anti-drug policies, No one knows for sure the “I can’t wait to date him found to the problem of either “Rodney thinks there though nobody could give all through high school, then ramifications that the rise of drugs, bullying or cockroach- might be more than one,” any information as to how I’ll follow him to college. either drugs, bullying or cock- es because experts cannot Rodney said.
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