Th e u m s c r a p e r GT h e In d e p e n d e n t Jo h n F. Ke n n e d y Sc h o o l St u d e n t s ‘ Ne w s p a p e r Volume XIII, Issue IV Friday, December 18, 2009 Circulation: 600 PAGE 1

Th e Gu m s c r a p e r An Open Letter to the President of

Speaks! the United States Dear Mr. Obama, the Afghans! There may be a few cul- As the last week of school before tural differences, but that issue should break draws to an end, we I would like to commend you for your settle itself after we give them great have decided to provide you with one excellent work in promoting world- institutions like McDonald’s and Holly- of our rare Gumscrapers, not just to wide peace. The Nobel Prize committee wood. After all, the export of democracy support our school’s mission to abolish chose wisely this year. I was delighted worked really well in countries like Co- vandalism, but also because it is long to hear that your new Afghanistan- lombia and Panama. overdue since the last issue appeared strategy includes sending 30 000 new Furthermore, I applaud your refusal to in September 2005. We recall those troops to the country. Past conflicts sign the Convention on the Prohibition turbulent times with dramatic articles have truly shown us that such escala- of the Use, Stockpiling, Production and (“Is it my Right or my Privilege to Use tions always work. The glorious US vic- Transfer of Anti-Personnel Mines and on the Library?“) and important issues such tory in the Vietnam War could not have their Destruction. Land mines are an as the 11th grade class trips and the been achieved had the great Presidents absolutely necessary tool for attaining doubled cost of photocopies. Nowadays Lyndon Johnson and Richard Nixon not and maintaining peace and democracy! we have less muck to rake, and have dispatched thousands over thousands Great nations as the Democratic Peo- therefore decided to scrape some gum of brave US soldiers to defend our no- ple’s Republic of Korea have proven this instead. ble democratic allies in South Vietnam to the world – their mining of the border and fight the abominable communist between North and South Korea has en- We also want to thank you for the vigorous aggression. As we draw parallels to sured peaceful and prosperous relations responses to our last issue featuring the Vietnam, have you considered the stra- for the past 50 years. Sure, many peo- swine flu. Our Mathematik-LK-editors tegic possibilities of napalm and Agent ple, especially children, die or lose limbs estimate that 76.2% of the student and Orange in Afghanistan? I mean, it’s not every day through land mines. But then teacher body was or still is infected with like those ever harmed civilians or any- again, life is just not fair. It may take the virus, including 3.7% that are nearly thing. I also urge you retain our for- years to de-mine former areas of con- dead (judging by the recurring names mer President George W. Bush’s highly flict, but who cares? It’s not like any listed on the substitution board since venerated policy for finding terrorists: Americans are getting killed. weeks). smoke ‘em out of their caves! If you I dearly hope you will take my sugges- send enough troops, it shouldn’t take tions to heart, Mr. President. With the We challenge you to finish our Christmas you too long to search every single one Nobel Peace Prize in your pocket, I hope puzzle while enjoying the variety of of the several million caves in the Hindu you will take all measures necessary class Christmas parties, which seem to Kush Mountains. Sure, it could take a to ensure a peaceful democratic world compose the major part of the last week few years (or centuries), but you’ve got based on American values, which are of school. Our Handy Hyperlinks column to start somewhere. Let’s be optimistic better than all others, as history has is sure to assist those of you doomed here! shown. Show those fuckers who’s boss! to be working on research papers over But despite all our noble efforts, some Kick some ass! break. We also urge you to ponder over cynics still point out that Afghanistan’s your upcoming New Year’s resolutions, political structure is inherently corrupt. Patriotic greetings, as we have worked countless hours I say, let’s tackle the problem like we developing our own. In 2010, we hope did in the past: by pressing our West- to conduct more student directed polls, ern democracy and value system onto Noah Walker-Crawford plan to kidnap and torture talented writers in return for priceless articles, and will initiate a petition concerning the installment of a vegan Dönerbude in Haus Reil, forcing Mr. Lally to change his Christmas To Do List professional attire and accent. Can you Are you tired of the slushy mud we enjoy the weeks thereafter, even during top that? once called snow? Fed up that our Win- this most hideous time of year: ter Wonderland is actually sinister and 1. Bake cookies: Everyone enjoys the Cheers, bland? Are you sick of how Berlin makes smell of these delicious treats! They every season feel pathetic, hid- make for perfect gifts for your friends the Editors eous, and superfluous? and family and either take barely no Here are some ways for you to bring time at all or the whole day to make, back that Christmas “Vorfreude” and depending on how badly you want to

Christmas, continued on page 2 Volume XIII, Issue IV Friday, December 18, 2009 Circulation: 600 PAGE 2 Christmas Special Christmas, continued from page 1 drown the day out. This is also some- Wochenende-Ticket costs 37€ for up to thing you can do with that special some- 5 people and can get you to a small town one: it’s a cute way to bond that costs called Braunlage, a pretty decent ski re- very little money. sort with a great view of the Brocken. -Staff- 2. Make freezer snowballs: They are 6. Go to the Chanukah Market: Al- just as fun to stuff down people’s shirts though it’s small, it’s different than the Box and pants and allow you to trick them, same old overfilled Christmas markets. if only momentarily, that there is snow It also won’t be cold, since it’s inside Founding Fathers: outside. the Jewish Museum. Something you’ll Mikolaj Bekasiak 3. Wear wooly, cozy, Christmas-style want to see (and, if you’re brave, taste) Seth Hepner socks: No one has to see them, no one is their large and quite abnormal selec- Adam Nagorski has to know, but as long as you’re wear- tion of mustards… ing them, they will give you that feeling. 7. Build a Lebkuchenhaus: Smells great, Editors: It’s like wearing Superman underpants, looks great, and tastes great afterwards. Carolynn Look it makes you feel stronger… Although it seems childlike, it’s sure to Eileen Wagner 4. Drink Glühwein: You only get to once bring back some good memories! Lena Walther a year. So throw away that Rotkäpp- 8. Donate to Charity: Prepare a “Christ- Moritz Zeidler chen Sekt and let yourself be warmed mas in a Shoebox”, sing carols for Com- up from head to toes! munity Service, or even just smile at Layout Editors: 5. Participate in winter sports: You someone; it’s bound to bring back that Isabel Vicaría Barker know where to go for ice-skating, but Christmas spirit, which is, after all, a Farsane Tabataba-Vakili if you don’t want to ski across from commercialized anti-depressant during Journalists: the Potsdamer Platz Arkaden, get a this most suicide-invoking time of year. Paula Elle group of friends together and go to the Harzgebirge for a weekend! A Schönes- Carolynn Look Stefanie Gebele Rebecca Jetter Sophia Kula Kirstin Lazarus Stefanie Lehmann Handy Hyperlinks Max Jürgens This time around we have a wonderful unlimited access to books and informa- Hyerin Park list of legal online libraries for you to pe- tion on the web, free of charge.” It’s es- Ina Schmidt ruse during your copious free time in the pecially useful for poems and reference Noah Walker-Crawford holidays. like looking up quotations or correct English usage. The latest featured book Antonia Walther --http://www.classic-literature.co.uk/ is Grey’s Anatomy of the Human Body. A site that has a nice collection of well- known books in multiple languages, --http://www.readprint.com/ including all of Shakespeare’s works, Over 8000 online books by over 3500 Charles Darwin’s books, and recipes. authors from Aesop to Emile Zola. Th e Gu m s c r a p e r is an independent --http://www.gutenberg.org/wiki/Main_ --http://www.pagebypagebooks.com/ newspaper. The opinions expressed here Page This site has hundreds of classic books in no way reflect those of the administra- Project Gutenberg is an ambitious proj- that ‘everyone’ has read in a page-by- tion of the John F. Kennedy School. ect that aims to save a copy of every page style that allows you to bookmark public domain book ever published on- the page you were on and easily return line. It’s a community-wide effort, as to it later. anyone can help simply by signing up and proofreading a page or two. By now --http://www.onlinebooks4free.com/ they have over 30 000 books with more 9287 free online books in topics rang- being added every day, ranging from ing from education over recreation to The Cynic’s Freud’s psychoanalyses to fictional -ac technology. counts of the witch hunts. --http://onlinebooks.library.upenn. Dictionary -- http://sacred-texts.com/ edu/ The Internet Sacred Text Archive is a free STUPIDITY This site lists over 35 000 free books th archive of “online books about religion, online and is also updated rather fre- “Posting ‘I am 9 to comment’ on a mythology, folklore and the esoteric”. quently. It also includes foreign lan- Facebook thread.“ The site’s definition of ‘sacred’ is rather guage books and features women writ- - Stefanie Lehmann broad and as such there are many, many ers, prize winners, and banned books. books here with more being added every Feeling cynical, too? day, in topics ranging from African over --http://books.google.com/ LGBT to Zoroastrianism. Google has finally come to an agree- Then submit your own definitions to [email protected] by ment with publishers, so we have an- th -- http://www.bartleby.com/ other site – probably most well-known January 11 . To quote the site, “the preeminent In- – that offers you free, legal online books ternet publisher of literature, reference to read. and verse providing students, research- ers and the intellectually curious with Sophia Kula Eileen Wagner Volume XIII, Issue IV Friday, December 18, 2009 Circulation: 600 PAGE 3 Christmas Special Tales from Beyond the Looking-Glass: Tales from Beyond the Looking-Glass to the Winter Solstice, the longest night as a representation of the gift the God- will feature articles about non-main- of the year. This day falls on or around dess gives to the earth in the form of stream groups of people. In the arti- the 21st of December, depending on as- the Sun God. Another aspect of this cles, I assume that esoteric beliefs and trological variables. festival is the turn of the wheel of life practices are real and work. Those who According to many Pagan traditions, – since many Pagans believe in reincar- believe only in what science has so far there are eight Sabbats, or holy days, nation, the birth of the God is seen not been able to prove may find these ar- spaced evenly throughout the year. so much as the start of life but as its ticles to be rather silly and unrealistic. These reflect the changing of the sea- continuance. This time around I’ll be talking about sons and often have a specific myth Other than that, Yule can be a quiet fes- a Neo-Pagan Midwinter festival. I will about the Earth Goddess and the Sun tival of contemplation and reflection, or make gross generalisations, since Neo- God corresponding to every Sabbat. Yule it can be a joyful occasion celebrated Pagans have no one central holy book celebrates the birth of the God and the with friends and family and including or doctrine. In fact, there is no state- return of the sun. There are many tra- much singing, feasting, and laughing. ment one can make that would be true ditional practices surrounding this festi- Much like any other religious celebra- about all Pagan traditions. The tradition val, most of them similar or identical to tion, really. described here is most often found in more mainstream celebrations, merely For more information on Paganism and Wiccan groups. with a different symbolic meaning. Mis- its celebrations, I suggest searching the With the commercialised Christmas tletoe and holly are hung as a symbol of internet for Paganism, Wicca, Yule, or spirit permeating the air wherever one the God and Goddess respectively, and Winter Solstice. There is a wealth of in- goes, it may be easy to forget the re- evergreen branches or a tree represent formation to be had freely. Also, these ligious aspect of the festival. I could the new life, since around this time they books (in our school library) are very write about the Christian tradition, but are usually the only green plant around. informative: I’m sure most of you will be familiar Often trees are decorated with natural Drawing Down the Moon by Margot with it, so instead, I will concentrate materials such as apples, oranges, bags Adler on a less-known festival that also falls of spices or strings of rosebuds. Where to Park Your Broomstick: A Teen’s around this time: Yule. In the evening, the is burned Guide to Witchcraft by Lauren Manoy Today, Yule has come to be synonymous to signify the rebirth of the God within If you want to contact me, just send an with Christmas. However, the word the sacred fires of the Mother Goddess. email to [email protected]. originally comes from Old English and A small part of it is kept until the fol- referred to a twelve-day Pagan festival. lowing year, when it aids in lighting the Modern-day Pagans have also adopted new Yule fire, thus symbolically being this term for their own, taking it to refer reborn as well. Presents are exchanged Endless Song The Meaning of Christmas Have you ever felt like the effect that Christmas has lessens Why is this happening? The fact that we already have ev- every year? Have you noticed that the meaning of Christmas erything we need is one answer. As mentioned before, the changes as you grow older? presents we were getting added to the excitement of Christ- Christmas is the day Christ was born, and so it is a mas when we were small. Now that we have pocket money religious holiday for Christians. However, those who have ev- and our own small part-time jobs, we are not as dependent erything often forget this fact. A lot of people do not go to on our parents, and when we see something we want we can church on Christmas, instead they spend their time giving buy it ourselves. Wishes are also fulfilled throughout the year presents, decorating the house, and eating lots of sweets. by our parents. I’m sure a lot of you have found yourself We now sing “” or “” instead wondering what you should wish for this year when asked. of “Silent Night”. Over time, Christmas has become more of a A much more important issue, however, is that none of us chance to celebrate than a traditional religious holiday. believe in , or the “” anymore. No one Remembering the of your early childhood, you writes letters to Santa nowadays, and every year little kids usually think back to huge family gatherings which included stop doing this at a younger age. your close family as well as grandparents, cousins, aunts and Finally, the meaning of Christmas changes once more when uncles. You usually recall having one big Christmas meal to- you grow from a teenager to an adult. You start to find more gether and unwrapping the toys you had wished for all year, pleasure in giving presents than in receiving them. It be- then being allowed to stay up late playing with them. comes an opportunity to show the people that are close to Comparing these memories with this year’s Christmas is al- you how much they mean to you. Grown-ups also use this most impossible. As teenagers we have started wishing for “Time of Reflection” during the holiday season to think about Laptops, digital cameras, i-Phones, or clothes instead of Lego what has become of their life and if they are happy with it. or stuffed animals. Sometimes we even receive these pres- What does Christmas mean to you? Maybe now is the time ents before the 24th or 25th for practical reasons. And most to think about it…. people now celebrate Christmas having lost the sense of its real meaning. The fact is that we have lost the excitement and faith that used to accompany Christmas. Ina Schmidt

Comments, Replies? send your opinions and articles to: [email protected] Volume XIII, Issue IV Friday, December 18, 2009 Circulation: 600 PAGE 4 Christmas Special Fun Facts about Christmas 2 – Number of Christmas Islands: Former island Kiritimati in Origin of the name “Christmas”: a contraction of “Christ’s the Pacific Ocean and a 52 square mile island in the Indian Mass.” Ocean Origin of the name “X-mas”: In Greek X means “Christ.” 6 – Weeks worked on “A ” Germany made the first artificial Christmas trees, which were 7 – White Christmases England has known in the entire 20th made of goose feathers that had been dyed green. century Originally written for Thanksgiving, “Jingle Bells” became one 18 – Tons of candle wax burned down in Wittenberg during of the most popular Christmas songs. one Christmas season at the time of Martin Luther Around Christmas time diamonds are sold more than at any 44 – Languages “Silent Night” has been translated into other time of the year. 364 – Gifts in the song “The ” you Many cities in the US have holiday names. Some of them would receive are Christmas, Christmasville, Noel, Holiday, Santa , Santa 2,000 - Candy canes shown in the movie “How the Grinch Claus, Saint Nicholaus, North Pole, , Park, Stole Christmas” (2000) Holly, Spruce, Tannenbaum, Jolly, Joy, Hambug, Gift , Snow, 4,000 – People who become ill from overdue Christmas left- Snowflake, Silver Bell, Bell, Candle, Reindeer, Antler,- Par overs tridge, Pear Tree, Swans, Star, Hallelujah Junction, Advent, 5,340 –Times Visa Cards are used on average every minute Angel City, Shepherd, Eggnog, and Chestnut. in the US during the Christmas buying season 8,200 – Christmas ornaments featured in the movie “How the Sources: Grinch Stole Christmas” (2000) www.christmas-celebrations.com, www.corsinet.com, www. 52,000 – depicted in the movie “How the smsuspur.net, www.theholidayspot.com, www.woodlands- Grinch Stole Christmas” (2000) junior.kent.sch.uk 37.1 million – number of real Christmas trees bought in America each year (National Association) Rebecca Jetter

ChristmasEileen Wagner Puzzles!!

This is a modified version of sudoku, consisting only of stars in deformed areas. Draw two stars in every line, column and every boldly framed area. Stars may not be tangent to each other, not even diagonally. The solution will be published in the next issue. (Source: www.croco-puzzle.com).

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