CORNERSTONE CHURCH December 30, 2012

BEHIND THE SCENES: Demas, A Man Who Failed :10–14 / :9–10

Introduction: How much money is spent at Christmas • I hope each of you had a wonderful Christmas. I hope you enjoyed your time with your family and friends, around the Christmas tree, dinner table, or whatever else your traditions might be. I really do not know what went on at your particular house on Christmas day or this past week. But I could guess one thing. I could guess that there was, at some level, a pull towards to the things of the world. • Maybe it was in the hearts of your children who received and wanted more and more things. Maybe it was in the heart of your siblings who didn’t get what they wanted to get. Maybe it was in the heart of your parents or grandparents who wanted to “spoil” the people they love. I do not have to tell you, because you feel it every year about this time, but this season is filled with commercialism. There is more money spent during this season than any other holiday. Here are a few statistics that I recently found that really shocked me. o Did you know that it is estimated there is 2.6 billion dollars spent worldwide each year on wrapping paper. Our family is going to newspapers for now on. o In case you were wondering, this spending spree that America finds itself in every year usually starts on the day after Thanksgiving. This year, the four days, Black Friday—Cyber Monday, it is estimated there was 59.1 billion dollars spent in stores and online. Up from 52.4 billion in 2011. o The world’s largest Christmas tree is 43’ tall in the Emirates Place Hotel in Abu Dhabi. It is estimated to be worth 11 million dollars, containing 181 diamonds, pearls, emeralds, and sapphires (btw, it is constantly guarded by 4 security guards) o It is estimated that the average American spends $750 on Christmas—from gifts to flowers to cards to food and so on. • We could keep going with statistics on the amount of money that is spent each year. But you get the idea.

Let me be clear this morning. What we are going to talk about this morning is not to make anyone feel guilty. If you spent a lot of money on presents, food, or other things this year, I want you to know there is nothing inherently wrong in that. My goal is not to make anyone feel bad, but to continually keep before us that the things of the world are in fact a lure or temptation for us. Continually. So much so that and the Apostles constantly warned us to not love the world.

1 Jesus said that we couldn’t love both God and money at the same time (Matt. 6:24). It just can’t happen. The Apostle John said that if we love the things of the world, it proves that we do not have a love for the Father in us (1 John 2:15). It is inconceivable for us to say we love God—it is impossible to say that Jesus is our God—and then to live in such a way that we covet, desire, long for, or constantly move towards the things of this world as if they are in fact our god.

During the month of December, we have been looking at some of the men and women that God used Behind the Scenes in the early church. These are men and women who may not have been really popular, we might not have heard too much about them, but God used them mightily in the spread of the of Jesus .

This morning, in light of the New Year, in light of the time that we find ourselves in, I wanted to change our focus a bit and look at the life of one man that didn’t end so well. He was a man who started well, but failed to finish the race. And apparently, the thing that eventually did him in was his love for the things of the world. The man I am referring to goes by the name of Demas. He is a man who failed. But before we get to his failure, I want you to see how his life started.

 Colossians 4:10–14

As we have said with many of the other people in this study, we do not know much about his background. We do not know much about his personal life. As with the others, we speculate that he grew up in a pagan household. After all, this is the first generation church and most everyone did. The first mention of him is found by the Apostle Paul in Colossians 4:14. Paul, in writing to his friends at the church of Colossae, states that Demas greets them.

Now, in order to fully understand this, we are going to need to understand the historical setting that Paul finds himself as he writes this letter. The Apostle Paul was the greatest evangelist of the gospel the world has seen outside of Jesus. He was the one who was called to take the gospel to the Gentile world, which is accounted for us in the book of Acts.

As you read through the book of Acts, we see that Paul took three different occasions where he went on missionary journeys. Towards the end of the book of Acts, we are told about his 3rd missionary journey—when Paul spends around three years in Ephesus, probably around A.D. 56. We are told that during his ministry there, that . . .

 Acts 19:10  “all the residents of Asia heard the word of the Lord, both Jews and Greeks.”

2 Most likely, it was at this time that the gospel message made its way to Colossae, a city located about 100 miles straight east of Ephesus. A man by the name of was passing through Ephesus and heard the gospel, believed, and took it back to his hometown. He began to preach to his friends and family and they believed and a church was born in Colossae.

It makes the most logical sense that it was this time when Demas would have heard the gospel, and at least made a profession of the gospel. How do we know that? Well, track forward with me now. After the church is planted, the book of Acts comes to an end in A. D. 61 with Paul in prison in Rome. This is what is known as his first imprisonment, which was more like a house arrest. Don’t get me wrong; it was a real imprisonment with real guards that were really chained to him. But the outlook wasn’t too bleak. It was well assumed that he would be released in due time.

In this imprisonment, he was allowed to have people come and visit him. He was not allowed to leave his quarters, but he could share the gospel openly with people that came to him. The book of Acts ends this way:

 Acts 28:30–31  “He lived there two whole years at his own expense, and welcomed all who came to him, proclaiming the kingdom of God and teaching about the Lord Jesus Christ with all boldness and without hindrance.”

While he is in this prison, Paul writes 4 letters—known as the prison . He first writes Ephesians, Colossians and Philemon & later that year writes Philippians. What Paul does is to send those first 3 letters (Ephesians, Colossians, & Philemon) to their respective places from Rome carried by two gentlemen, & .

Why is this history lesson important? It is here that we meet Demas. We are told that he greeted the people in Colossae. Why? The only reason why Paul would include a greeting from him to them would have been if he knew them. He was a friend with many of them. This gives us some historical background that Demas was most likely from the Colossae region.

I can well picture the scene, as Paul is in prison that Demas finds his way to him in that house. Here we have a guy who ends up spending time with Paul in his imprisonment. And as Paul is writing this letter to Colossae, I picture Demas looking over his shoulder saying, “Make sure and tell them that I said hello.” He was sending greetings back to his hometown. In fact, in the other letter that is sent at the same time, but to Philemon, we are told that Demas was one of the fellow prisoners & workers with Paul.

 Philemon 1:23–24  “Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, sends greetings to you, and so do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, and Luke, my fellow workers.”

3 What does that mean? It means that at this point in Paul’s life, Demas was one of his closest friends and helpers in the spread of the gospel. Paul is surrounded by some of his closest friends, and one of them is Demas. What this means is that early on in his life, things were on the right track. He was doing the right things.

There is probably something to be learned here from this. What would life look like if you were to stick by your friends through the good and the bad? What would it mean for you to be a friend that sticks by someone, no matter what happens to them? No matter what you discover about them. No matter what they go through. What would it be like to extend yourself to your friends when they are at their worst? That’s what Demas is doing.

And in case you wonder whether it is important, flip the script around for a minute. What would it mean for you to be really known by someone and realize that they still accept you? What would it be like to get a phone call in your moment of tragedy? What would it be like to have someone come over and sit with you, pray with you, be your friend when you are at your bottom? Then be that for someone else, because my guess is that we would all long for that kind of friendship.

At this point, you might be thinking, “Demas sounds like a pretty rock solid guy. I would like someone to go to prison with me. He sounds like a friend that I would like to have & maybe someone I would like to be like. I want to be someone who risked my life, and gave up my life up for the gospel of Jesus Christ. I want to be a friend that sticks by my friends that have risked their life for the gospel.”

And on one level, you’re right. You should. But the problem is that this is only part of the story of Demas’ life. There are many parts of the Scriptures that teach us that it isn’t only about how we start, but how we finish that matters in our . The finish line matters, not just the starting blocks.

As the story continues, Paul is released from prison about A.D. 62. During this time, Paul travels some more and continues to preach the gospel. Then, about four years later, Paul is once again arrested and imprisoned. But this time, it is the real deal. It is a much more sever imprisonment. Paul is not put in a house; he is put in a dark, damp, crowded dungeon, known as a Mamertine Prison.

Paul is bound by heavy chains and is placed deep under the streets of Rome. The prison is probably close to or connected to one of the arenas that Nero had at that time for the torture and murder of Christians. Maybe even the Roman Coliseum. Paul knew that his time was soon to come to an end. Stuck in this cold, dark situation is probably a time that you would long for companionship that he had before. And this is where we are told some very disturbing news concerning Demas.

4  2 Timothy 4:9–10 [open & read]

Let those words just sit for a minute. The one main thing we have written about him, the thing that sticks as his epitaph is that he abandoned Paul. And in case you do not get it, the implication is that abandoning Paul is abandoning the Christian faith.

Demas was once a man who stood by Paul, even to prison, but now he has quit. He abandons Paul. He splits town. The most disturbing portion is the reason. Paul is writing this account to his friend Timothy, he tells that the reason Demas felt it necessary to leave was not because he wanted to do other ministry somewhere else. It wasn’t that he had to take care of some family issues. It wasn’t that he had to get back to work since his vacation time was over. The reason Paul gives is that he left because he was “in love with the present world.”

Let’s just be honest with each other . . . that hurts. No Christians that I know would desire to have that said about them. “Oh, Frank, he just loves the world too much.” That is indicting. That is sad. So what happened? He once was in prison with Paul and now he bails on Paul because of love for the things of the world?

If we had to conjecture a possible scenario, it might have gone something like this: The more and more time that Demas spent with Paul, the more likely it was that he would soon experience his own persecution. I mean, he is hanging out with a guy accused and sentenced to death—how much time would pass until they accused those close to Paul with the same crimes. Maybe even punish them like they are punishing Paul—maybe even with their death. And apparently, when Demas looked at his options, he acted as if the things of the world far outweighed the option of potential sacrifice for the cause of Christ.

It seems to me that Demas liked the things about God; he liked the things about the gospel; he liked the things about Jesus. But he did not love God, love the gospel, or love Christ. I really hope you understand the difference between liking things about God and loving Him. That difference is usually exposed when things get tough in the Christian life. Let me explain.

You see, there are many people who like the things of God. They like the morality that the church promotes. They like living a good life. They even like the sacrificial message that is promoted about Jesus—after all, He is a good example of humility for us to follow. They like the friends that they make. They like that they can feel accepted. And as long as they are not asked to give too much, they feel as if they are a better person for belonging to God.

But the problem comes in the midst of persecution. There is something about sacrifice that can tend to separate the boys from the men. The problem comes when Jesus begins to ask things of you. The problem for those like Demas

5 comes when they are asked to sacrifice their money, their time, or worst, their life for the sake of the gospel. And faced with that situation, since they liked the fringe aspects of Christianity, but did not love Christ, they run from it. They liked it when it was in their favor and well-being, but not if it cost them too much in life.

I could even illustrate it this way. There are many people who love things about their spouse, but they do not love their spouse. Unfortunately, there are millions of people in bad marriages. It breaks my heart. And when their spouse doesn’t continually meet their needs and make them feel better about themselves, they begin to think, “What good are they?” They are in that relationship for what they can get, not for what they can give. It is about them. It is a selfish relationship. And as silly as it sounds, that is how many people treat Jesus. Selfishly. They are down with Jesus as long as Jesus is doing things for them, but if Jesus is asking things from them, it’s a game changer.

This is what I would perceive is going on with Demas. At some point, he realized what he was being asked to give or sacrifice for Jesus; that the cost of following Jesus was greater to him than the assumed benefits he thought he was receiving from that relationship . . . and so he runs. He runs towards the things of the world that had been shouting out to him over and over that it would bring the peace and satisfaction that he truly was looking for in his life.

Listen, it breaks my heart. But I say this every year and the sad truth is that there are always some people that will not hear this word next year. But some of you will not be here next year. Not because you are visiting grandma. But some of you over the course of this next year will begin to drift and eventually quit the race.

Statistics and experience tells me that a percentage of you will bail on the relationship you say you have with Jesus. You will quit. And my guess, and I could be wrong, but my guess is that it will happen when what you think you should get from Him doesn’t match up to the sacrifice you think He is asking of you. And so you quit.

This morning, I am begging you to realize the battle, the war that we are in. I am begging you to put on the hard hat and be a real man or woman. I am begging you to never quit! We live in a world of quitters. If things do not come easy or if things do not work out the way we think they should, people quit. In just about two weeks or more, you are going to find out as you quit the gym, your diet, or whatever new years resolution you make. But the thing that you must resolve you will not bail on is your relationship with Jesus.

I think people eventually quit because, as we have said, Jesus was not central in their life. He was a part of their life, but He wasn’t their life. Church was just something they did on Sundays, but it was more like something they checked off their list of things they do to make them feel better. It wasn’t that

6 it was central to their relationship to Jesus. Many people find themselves struggling with loving the world and not Jesus is because these words from Paul are often foreign to us . . .

:1–4  “If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.”

Jesus, for the Christian, is not just the giver of life, but actually the Life. That’s what Jesus said. He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Let’s be honest. I wonder if the reason why we are so tempted to have our minds on so many other things; the reason we might bail on Jesus and run the way of the world is that we have made or see Jesus as part of our life and not our life! We have so compartmentalized the spiritual and the physical. We have our things on earth and we have our spiritual things. But Christian, Jesus is to be our life! He is to be part of all of it.

 It’s not that we have our money and then we have our Savior—no, we view our money through our Savior.  It’s not that we have our marriage and then we have our Savior—no, we need to view our marriage through the lens of our Savior.  It’s not that we have our jobs and then we have our Savior—no, we should see our jobs through our Savior.  It’s not that we have our kids and then we have our Savior—no, we see our kids through our Savior.  It’s not that we have our hobbies and then we have our Savior—no, we see our hobbies through the lens of our Savior.  It’s not that we have Christmas and then we have our Savior—no, we see our Christmas through the lens of our Savior. If He is our life, why wouldn’t we see everything we do through Him?

Yes, that means thinking and seeking Jesus through shoveling the snow. It means thinking and seeking Jesus through basketball. It means thinking and seeking Jesus through sewing (what do you women do?). It means thinking and seeking Jesus through changing a diaper. It means thinking and seeing Jesus as your life as you begin 2013.

What keeps us from fully thinking and seeing Jesus as our life is that we have a very serious idolatry problem. We so often put so many things before Him. We often rob Jesus of the place of the throne in our life and replaced Him with so many things. And when we do that, without coming back to Him in repentance, we will eventually find ourselves like Demas running away.

7 In all reality, Demas’ issue was a worship issue. There was something that He saw as valuable in the things of the world and so he bowed his knee to them and worshipped it. It gained a higher priority in his life than that of serving Jesus and the church. What’s your thing? What is your idol? I’m not talking about the wooden fat guy that sits on some shelf in your house. I’m talking about that thing, that person, that idea—what is it that you put your hope and glory in over and above that of Jesus Christ?

I want to end this morning with a list of questions by Tim Keller that has been helpful for me in uncovering idols in my life. I thought it would be helpful this morning to share this list of questions with you so that we might all be able to uncover our idols so that we could avoid turning out like Demas. My challenge to you is that you would take answering these questions seriously, with an honest heart. Make this one of your new years resolutions—to answer these questions as best as you can & to fight your heart of idolatry.

1. What am I most afraid of?

Are you afraid of being alone? Then maybe your idol could be some person or some job. What happens is that often times, we live or react to the creatures in our life, not the Creator and in so doing we put them as more important in our life than God.

“However you put it, the fear of man can be summarized this way: we replace God with people. Instead of a biblically guided fear of the Lord, we fear others. Of course, the ‘fear of man’ goes by other names. When we are in our teens, it is called ‘peer pressure.’ When we are older, it is called ‘people pleasing.’ Recently, it has been called ‘codependency.’ With these labels in mind, we can spot the fear of man everywhere.”1

2. What do I long for most passionately?

What is it that consumes my thinking? What am I longing for? What is it that gets us up in the morning . . . is it our job? Is it our spouse? Is it a hobby? I am not talking about being excited for something big that is happening in your life. I’m talking about your pattern of life. What is it that you most passionately long for—to win the lottery? Anything other than the Creator God of the Universe will probably be an idol for you.

3. Where do I run for comfort?

When things get difficult, where do we run? Who do we run to? Do you run to certain friends? Do you just have to talk to the pastor? Can you not live without your spouse to help you in time of need? There are some people that run to other people, but others will run to food. There are some that will run to

1 Welch, Edward T. When People are Big and God is Small (Phillipsburg, NJ: P & R Publishing, 1997), 14. 8 alcohol. There are others that will run to Television in order to numb the feeling that their life is meaningless.

4. What do I complain about most?

 Philippians 2:14  “Do all things without grumbling or disputing;”

Remember the children of Israel as they were wandering around in the wilderness and were without food or water? They would grumble and complain because their god of comfort and provisions were taken from them and they would rather of had them than to worship the God of their Fathers, the God of the Bible. Often times, that which we complain about most is that which is a god for us. It could be the weather. But it could be family, hurt relationships, good grades for your kids, or your favorite sports team.

5. What angers me most?

Disrespect? Maybe your idol has something to do with the way you are perceived by people in life. Maybe an idol for you is your reputation and when people do something to hurt that, you just get ticked off.

Maybe you are angered by inconveniences. If so, maybe your idol is your comfort. Maybe you have to have things that make life a little easier for you. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing inherently wrong with a furnace or a snow blower, but could you live without them?

Maybe you just get ticked off when people don’t do it your way? That’s when you get angry. Maybe your idol is you. Maybe you are your own god.

6. What makes me the happiest?

Seeing my child be successful? Cubs winning the World Series?

7. How do I introduce myself to others?

Do you talk about yourself as the Doctor, the CEO, the Contractor, the Teacher, etc . . . Do you constantly talk about who you know and what kind of big jobs you have accomplished? [Let me be honest, being here at CBC has been helpful for my heart as most of you don’t care about my degrees].

8. What causes me to be angry with God?

Have you ever been angry with God? What is it that made you angry with Him? Loss of a job? Maybe that was an idol to you. Loss of a ministry? Maybe that was an idol to you. Loss of a loved one? Maybe he or she was an idol to you.

9 9. What do I brag about?

For me, honestly, it is my kids. Here is how idolatry can happen; it is easy for me to put in place of God my family. I am often really convicted about this. I feel as if I can talk about my kids more and more—look what they do. Listen to this story. Even to the point, and I bet you have felt this, that when someone is telling me a story about their kids, there is this temptation in me to one-up them, yea, but my kid did this.

I think we often think this is not that big of a deal because, well, talking favorably about your kids is a good thing. Right? That’s how deceptive this can be. Yes, it is good to talk good about your kids, but to brag about them is not. It just might be showing you that they are your idol.

10. What do I want to have more than anything else?

It could be something secular—boat, car, house, video game system, and so on. Or it could be a good marriage, successful kids, people following your ministry, and so on. What do you desire more—things in your life or the glory of Jesus done in your life? Often times, the greatest idols in our life are good things that we have turned into god type of things.

11. What do I sacrifice the most for in my life?

That which we sacrifice for might be the best question to test our idols. Romans 12 says that we worship that which we see as worthy and that which we are willing to dedicate our selves to in our life. What are you willing to ultimately sacrifice for? Maybe a vacation is your idol. Now listen, I am not saying that sacrificing for a vacation is sinful. It’s not. But what is your attitude, is it with an open hand or a closed fist? I am just suggesting that often times looking at our bank account or calendar might enlighten us to that which we are sacrificing for and dedicating ourselves to in life.

12. If I could change one thing in my life, what would it be?

Again, it might not be wrong for you to say that you would love to be 15 pounds lighter or that you wished you had hair. But it just might point out something to you that you care too deeply about those things.

13. Whose approval am I seeking?

Maybe it is your spouse, a pastor, a friend – they may be your idols.

14. What do I want to control or master?

15. What comfort do I treasure the most?

10 Many of these overlap, and so I guess what we are trying to do is to identify those things that we are often tempted to place as more important than Jesus. It’s not about how you start, but how you finish.

I think it would be negligent of me to leave you without what to do. In two days, we will have a new year. A clean start. As you seek to answer these questions, what can you do . . . what should you do? Let me give you a few steps that will help you avoid going down the Demas road.

1. Repent Often—Keep short accounts with God

2. Embrace Community—Keep Short Accounts with the church.

3. Seek Accountability—Keep short accounts with a few.

4. Nourish Your Faith—Stay connected with Jesus through reading the Word and praying.

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