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EXCLUSIVE: DMNI TESTS "UFO FRAGMENTS" ANTIMATTER: THE ULTIMATE FUEL ALIENS AND THE LAW: OK TO SHOOT ON 3» BRAVE NEW TOYS: SANTA COMPUTERIZES INTERVIEW: CAMBRIDGE'S FIRST DOCTGR-GPPArtHf* 3G¥

iparr 980 V onnruiNOVEMBER 1979

EDITOR & DESIGN DIRECTOR: BOB GUCCIONE EXECUTIVE EDITOR: FRANK KENDIG ART DIRECTOR FRANK DEViNO EUROPEAN EDITOR: DR. BERNARD DIXON FCTICN EjrO-i- BENBOVA IJREC"ORO r ADVERT SING BEVEH -V WAROALC EXECUTVE VCE-F^ESIDENI IPWIN L BILLMAN

CONTENTS PAGE

J. Anderson an 6 FIRST WORD . Opinion Dorm OMNIBUS Contibutors 8 COMMUNICATIONS Correspondence 10 FORUM Dialogue 12 EARTH Environment Kenneth B rower 14

SPACE Astronomy Mark R. Chartrand III 16

LIFE Bicmedicine Bernard Dixon 18

THE ARTS Film James Deison 20 STARS Comment Patrick Moore 26 30 UFO UPDATE Report Harry Lebelson , CONTINUUM Data Bank 35

ANTIMATTER REVEALED Article Robert L. Forward 44

DREAM HOUSE Article Ronald Dans 50

THE NUMBER OF THE BEAST Fiction Robert A. Heinlein 56

MANURED KAGE Pictorial Herbert W. Franke 66

MALTHUS'S DAY Fiction Jayge Carr 76

CARL SARGENT Interview Christopher Evans 80

ILLEGAL ALIENS Article Robert A. Freitas, Jr. 84

21ST-CENTURY FOSS Pictorial 88

CYBER FUNI Article 96

COMPETITION RESULTS Partly Baked Ideas Scot Morris 135

EXPLORATIONS Travel Cheryl Simon 137 ERUPTION Phenomena Pete Turner 140

GAMES Diversions Scot Morris 144 LAST WORD Opinion LA.P Moore 146 PHOTO CREDITS 142

G;:c.-gi ,:'; iI>:'S by Cr sm i-isl Liu. All rig ntsn Cover art for this month's Omni Ja -> O'.V: .:!, I.,-:- -i -.[.;. is a 1973 pairiling by the

; M-l':-1^":. German artist Ute Osterwalder, .ii.:.-.::.:T.^r v ; fnhilea Ears Arc Eyes. Painted di-iovvn : n-l^ni. E-,:.-j-::cr

in acrylic, it retiects the .' - :i ... i_i;-. 'iM -j.ii: U Ai O »-1 00

::-i-c;cg'aij:':i' approach that :;a'iaaa i,-.:\ il O Adams cJ '-- -'-" ..::. chaiactBrizns Osler.valder's =i-.rg-f i(i;l-s.-;=, >z :f'i: 4a> paintings. She lives in Hamburg, West Germany

A OMNI .

Aw a 'unbar deter rem. mdus'.nalisis would

be compered to transfer i rne:r technology [u other counties, perhaps on a subsidized-bast-S-

j : Moreover a sirong i' g:ii Inference- in paragraph 2 of Article VI and again in paragraph Sot Article Xi bars commercially oriented enterprises from engaging in experimental or pilot lunar operations. The treary does permit the use- of resources in 'scientific investigations.'' but then the issue oeccmes one of de-irung 'scientific in vesications 'You can Pel rhai excludes commercial space developments designed fo r future profit and Thif'd World spo; Tr" s is now inlerriar-ona monopolies are ' err iiod. ! :!: i in,, i i-g 5 < nip' and Third Wcid indue noes. Once me

treaty is signedby the United States, it is doubtful that the Department or State would authorize Amerean companies to begin commercial lunar exqloilaiion for fear oi interfering w.tn internationai negotiations. 'IvcU

in the treaty s ratification don.*: seem to reci seethatthe agreement is pecicusiy 4/Vo private enterprise will .antithetical to the free-market risk billions of develop meet of soar, e resources And yet, as vve -.'& revealed i.hroL;ql~ countless dollars on a moon-based articles in the pages of ihis magazine, free silicon factory enterprise is tne very boost needed toget ifmostofthe world disputes America inic s.usfaned orbit. Even if this :

tu-rns put no I to ne true, it -seems incredibly.;. its legal right shortsighted oi our nation to sign a to profit from that factory. 9 binding- treaty ;n v/men lire poiitical wiil oi oiner countries win dictate the pace aire substance oi space exploitation Wo can still try to change this treaty o;

ivyac! it off entirely. Wbar remains is io write io you; congressman immediately Tne Unired Stares has already approved the

new treaty n committee oi. the United

r-ialiom. where-: it will be virrualiy rubber-stamped by the General Assembly

this (all. ;n iact the moon f/ealy may

already have been passed a , you read lire, bui like ail r^aior inte:na;:onal ag Senate. Through auiek and effective political action, we may be able to encourage. our ;eu slaiors re take a second took. Beyond your own oori press man, key

target sof -a letter- writing campaign should include Senator Fran'': Church (D-ldaho), chairman ol the Senate Foreign Relations CcmmiUee. arid Representative Con Fuqua (D-Fla.!. who chairs the House

Committee on Science and Technology. If

' the United States iinaliy does ratify this agreement: the prospects for private ..enterprise on the moon and other celestial. bodies will disappear, OO

ra nags ng :a onnruii

you "murder" an alien being basic structure of matter, "is being made, ^eniagon? Not quite. They represent a Can so. captured, cooled, and stored tor days a; a new generation of computer ioys that may and gel off scot-free? Probably tne children play This month* In the eyes of the law, visitors from time in Switzerland right now." :t Urns out change way wl antimatter provides a data. led ook at some of space would fall somewhere between that the question is not teWw Omni all of which horses and stagecoaches. In this issue of can be produced for fuel in interspace these- revolutionary devices, Omni space-law specialist Robert A. travel but, simply, whether "we' want to do you'll find appearing on department-store this Freitas.Jr, tells why "illegal aliens just it." Look for the answers on page 44. shelves holiday season. Break out the aren't safe on planet Earth." Freitas, an Germany's leading photon icrographer, shopping lists and turn to "Cyber Fun!" attorney with degrees in physics and Manfred Kage has spent most of his life Special-effects photographer Peter Turner psychology, has been working for the past exploring the visual world of science and provides the graphics (page 96).

five years on a comprehensive review of maximizing its graphic appeal. A castle James Deiscn ore-views I he upcoming - ' for exobiology (the study of life on other deep within the'foothiiis o Germany's science-fiction and fantasy films 1980 planets). Author of several articles Schwabische Alb is Kage's laboratory, in The Arts (page 20). Despite numerous published \nAnalog magazine, last year where continuing projects mc'i.Jde the delays caused by the mad rush to beat he published a handbook dealing with transiormation of sound waves into brilliant one another to the screen, Delson reports political space activism entitled Lobbying colors and forms. This month Omni tbat motion-picture companies are now long-awaited Star tor Space. His insightful interpretation of provides a spectacular disp ay of Kage's prepared to release the

the artist Trek: The Motion Picture , The Black Hole , the law. as it pertains to the visiting aliens magic with a profile of by Herbert begins on page 84. W. Franke, one of Germany's leading SF and The Empire Strikes Back! Seven thousand feet above Lake Tahoe novelists beginning on page 66. Headlining this month's fiction is the sits the Smith home, considered "the most As any ufologist wii: tell you. ohyscal exciting conclusion of Robert A. Heinlein's innovative solar home in the world." Ronald evidence has always been the stumbling "The Number of the Beast" {page 56). Dans profiles the perfect habitat for the block for skeptcs and oe fevers alike. Jayge Carr marks her Omni debut with an tale childbirth (or lack 1980s in "Dream House" {page 50), an When Omni acquired two metal fragments extraordinary about in-depth report on the joys of "passive" purported to be of extraterrestrial of it) in the not-too-distant future solar heating. Dans, a graduate in provenance, we arranged to have them ("Malthus's Day," page 76). November issue is an electrical engineering, has been working analyzed by MIT. Harry Lebelson , a New Rounding out our Dr. in the computer field since 1966. Formerly York investigator for the Aerial Phenomena exclusive interview with Carl Sargent, a consultant with the Fusion Energy Research Organization, details a the first man ever to be g ranted a by Corporation, he is currently working on a fascinating experiment that raises more doctorate in parapsychology grand documentary for Omni. questions than it answers. Read for Cambridge University, England's Sargent's Back again is Dr. Robert L Forward. yourself in UFO Update {page 30). old academic institution. Dr. senior scientist at the Hughes Research Phaser guns, laser-firing vehicles, controversial techniques to determine the Laboratories in Malibu, California. Dr. robots that talk and analyze voice reality of ESP have created quite a stir in Forward describes what he calls the patterns, computerized hovercraft that British scientific circles. Find out why in "ultimate fuel," antimatter. This incredible shoot photon. torpedoes— are these new this intriguing probe by contributing editor 80. substance, a phenomenon essential to the secret weapons commissioned by the Christopher Evans , on page DO

a OMNI OTTERS THE CORPORATION __ caanrifiURjicMTiDru5

Roach Step A Toast Long accustomed to the occasional For several years now, along with many

:

nsens;tivity of scientif c types io Ihe other SF readers. I have been following the

niceties of great poetry, I must nonetheless exploitsof Doc Webster Ca lahan, Fast

take exception to Joyce McWilliams's Eddie, and, of course. Jake. If Ben Bova's admonition in "The Restless Roach" |Last personal medd ng was invoked in the Word, August 1979] that we avoid appearance of another "Callahan's

stepping on a cockroach because it might Crosstime Saloon" story [July 1979]. then I AOMINISTfWr be the reincarnation of Rod McKuen. personally want to wish him a heartfelt As a long-time student and lover of fine thanks. (The same io Spider Robinson for writing of course.) see, poetry, I would take agood deal of another You when the in the title personal delight in crushing a cockroach I book came out 1977 bearing

should suspect was Rod McKuen. A Callahan's Crosstime Saloon, I was afraid veritable army of scholars, writers, rhe demise of me saioon theme was and critics would undoubtedly pay to imminent. For the past two years the watch. possible appearance of a new "Callahan" In all fairness to Ms. McWilliams, story was quickly becoming a fading

however, I should point out that the hope.

reincarnation suggested is a particularly After reading the July issue of your

apt one. magazine. I reassessed my attitudes Robert E. Crawford toward miracles and Santa Claus. The

Lakeview, Oreg. next time I'm in a ban I will toast Spider ADVERTI3IMG OFFICES Robinson and Callahan's with a "Phillips

Being a denizen of the Deep South. I was Screwdriver" and hope that he never runs much entertained and intrigued by Joyce out of typewriter ribbon. McWilliams's searching article on the Edward A. Fleiss "restlessness" of cockroaches. Having Huntington, N.Y

had more dealings with the little devils

than I ever would have desired had I other In the Stars

alternatives, I feel I know them quite well The letter from astrologer Donna L Crazier and wish to state, for Ms. McWilliams's [July 1979], responding to the comments beneiit, that the most restless cockroach attributed to J. A. Wheeler that we live in a you'll ever (ind is he who perceives that country supporting 20,000 astrologers but you are about to slep on him. only 2.000 astronomers, may create You must be quick, or the little bugger several misimpressions. will lead you on a merry chase through the Regarding the number of astrologers in entire household. No matter how fast you this country, probably any estimate is as pursue, knocking over lamps, skinning good as any other There seem to be no your knees on the furniture, and stamping rcabie head counts, but in a recent your feet on empty spaces always one volume by noted astrologers the number

inch aft of the little monster, you'll seldom if of full-time professional asrdcgers is put ever get him. Not only that, but you'll look at 1.000. Rationality may ye; overcome. rather ludicrous to those observing the Ms. Crazier refers to astrology as an "art

spectacle, and they may have you and science." Astrology, as il stands today, committed. At any rate, it's my opinion that is a morass of conflicting principles and anyone willing to sit and watch the confused practitioners. An art perhaps, a

vile-looking creatures day after day to religion probably a science never. It is also record their degree of composure at clear to us that astronomy and astrology any one time must certainly be maso- were not so much "one and the same," as

chistic. I can't handle the looks of 'em as'roogers would like to believe. A myself. number of classical scholars, e.g., Frank Kiese Eudoxos and Cicero, decried astrology NOVEMBER New Orleans, '..a and pointed to it as being practiced by

CONTINUED ON PAGE 1 42 ,

DIALOGUE FDRURJI

In which the readers, editors, and Natural Defense science snc :echnccgy nave made correspondents discuss topics arising out In regard to Douglas Gasner's article, (recorded in the pages of Omni and other

of Omni and theories and speculation of "Interferon and Beyond" [July 1979]. I publications throughout the world), no general interest are brought forth. The must say that while the information scientist has been able to create a living views published are not necessarily those contained therein is rather interesting, it organism— noi even one single cell! of the editors. Letters for publication leads one toward unwise goals and hopes Independent of the crude and meager should be mailed to Omni Forum, Omni for the future. assistance of any scientist, there exists a Magazine. 909 Third Avenue, New York, Gasner fails to comprehend the life force, an innate intelligence, that

NX 10022. implications of the discovery of interferon should be recognized and respected. It is as being part of the "cells' natural the force that unites the sperm and the Antiquarian Vibes defenses." He fails to realize that ovum to form the zygote that will divide With all due respect to Carl Sagan as a interferon, in conjunction with the body's and differentiate until we see an adult probing and soecu ative professional, I other means of defense, known and Homo sapiens of between 25 and 40 am surprised that in his "White Dwarfs and unknown, will fulfill its function under quadrillion perfectly coordinated cells ot Green Men" lAugust 1979] he fails to normal circumstances, thus making varying and specific form and function.

if if acknowledge the possibility that laboratory production of this substance But there is interference with the nervous i

extraterrestrials did indeed visit Earth in superfluous. The body is capable of system . . the past, they may not have been even -- defending itsell against the external (and Donald E. Harte slightly interested in leaving a purposeful often infernal) threats of bacterial, viral, Great Neck, N.Y indication and explicit marker for a future and fungal attack, as well as the basically society to marvel at. Chances are that an internal threat of cancer. Colds, diabetes Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained extremely superior technology would not mellitus, angina pectoris, arthritis, cancer. Having been employed as a co-op student be impressed with just another outlying and soon which we call disease — are in an engineering branch of NASA's Mar- barbaric planet. Let's face it, our civi- more manifestations, symptoms, if you will, shall Space Flight Center. I must heartily lization, in general, has been no great joy of disease. They indicate a lack of ease or agree with all the points covered by Mr. to deal with - an attitude well defined, say, a lack ot health. It is interference with the Grey's article [First Word, August 1979], by Charlton Heston in Planet of the Apes. nervous system, that which maintains and We cannot blame NASA, and not even

II iixes for Stan K. Stephenson controls every cell in the body, that causes Congress, which NASA's budget, | Seminole, Fla. this lack of ease. Perhaps we should look our declining space program. American

to the removal of this interierence in the society is at fault— public apathy toward effort I was intrigued by Carl Sagan's article functioning of the nervous system in order the once-glorious space has

"White Dwarfs and Green Men" and would to attain and maintain good health. reached its zenith. I frequently hear irom : didn't like to add some information that I feel Perhaps we should look to chiropractic people. "We landed on the moon, supports the notion that Sirius B may have rather than to immunology. we? What else do you want?" been a red giant in earlier times. In 1662 In spite of all the amazing strides ihat To these same people I say: What do Anloine Arnault, a French Renaissance you want? To be a citizen of the most philosopher, wrote a book entitled The Art militarily secure nation on Earth? To live in of Thinking. In it is a passage by Vergil that a country that enjoys the prosperity and reilects the belief of the people of that day comforts of worldwide technological who credited the Dog Star, called Sirius in leadership? Latin, with the heat ot August: No American would deny having these desires, but so pitiably few recognize the Even as fiery Sirius, direct link between these aspirations and Bearer of drought and plague to feeble a conscientious space program. I would man. especially like to commend and Rises and saddens the sky with baleful encourage Omni's maintenance of light. pro-space attitudes. Endorsement of (AeneidX: 273-75) NASA's objectives is crucial to our nation's The key word here is fiery. Webster defines economy, security and scientific this word as "of the color of fire: intensely advancement. Come on, America. or unnaturally red." Nothing ventured, nothing gained! Don Peterson John Vassar Los Angeles, Calif. Atlanta. Ga.OQ

OMNi ENCOMtYUM EARTH By Kenneth Brower

n January 5 of this year the anti- that have immeasurably improved the He had a B.A. in philosophy from nuclear activist David Dinsmore design and safety review of nuclear Princeton, and he taught the philosophy of Comey was killed in an au- reactors." science for a while at Cornell. He carried tomobile crash in Wisconsin. No one has One of those who worked most closely around a briefcase saying 'CIA Legal hinted al foul play, as many have in the with Comey was Jim Harding, formerly an Departmeht.' He said he had been in the death of Karen Silkwood, another antinu- energy adviser to the state of California, CIA in Geneva. clear activist killed on the highway. This now energy director of Friends of the "He told me he had found evidence of a absence even of hints is sad. It points to a Earth. Swiss atomic weapon. He said he was

failure of imagination in the antinuclear "When I first met David," Harding told driving once in Switzerland on a high movement— a failure coincident with me recently, "I expected some lean young mountain road. A piece of the earth moved

Comey's departure. It never would have environmental activist. Instead, here was aside, and a couple of strategic warplanes happened had Comey been around to this well-fed Chicago beefeater. There are came out of the side of the mountain. He elaborate a theory for his death. such airs about David, with his handmade found out later that the mountains of David Comey was a paradox, deliberate suits, his gold pocket watch and chain, his Switzerland are full of tunneis— long ones, and self-made. He was an environ- bowler hat, his Cross leather luggage, his half a mile or more— so the planes couid mentalist who dressed like a captain of Dunhill pipes, his Gucci shoes— real build up speed before coming out." industry, an outrageous hyperbolist (when Gucci loafers — that I'm both believing and I smiled at this story Harding saw me playful) with a passion (when serious) for disbelieving. You get from his tales the smile and smiled himself, but less widely. the truth. Comey's account of The Death of same things you get from his clothes. You He had been there to hear Comey tell the

Comey would have been outlandishly don't quite believe, though it may all be tale, in all its Comey verisimilitude and farfetched and funny but it would have left true." detail, and he could not dismiss it entirely. you wondering whether it might, after all, (Harding's slip into the present tense David Comey played spy He had code be true. surprised me. The past tense, he must names for the people inside the Nuclear "He was one of the most effective in have felt, hurried Comey, his mentor, too Regulatory Commission who slipped him seeking out the jugular vulnerability of quickly toward oblivion.) information ("My contacts in the NRC"). nuclear power," says Dr. John Gofman. a "David has a very incisive wit. He cuts to His old employer, the CIA, was "The former member of the Atomic Establish- the bone analytically in his writing and Company," or "Acme Plumbing Company" ment, now one of its foremost resisters. thinking. He found the holes in reactors. He called himself "Dinsmore," or "Elsie "Comey was colorful, dogged, persistent. "He was fluent in Russian and German. Dinsmore Comey," or "Peter Rabbit."

He kept an air of joviality through it all. He Communiques from Peter Rabbit were wasn't the paranoid crusader." signed with a paw print. "Shred this," recipients . "He had an insatiable appetite for the were sometimes instructed. facts, pleasantly flavored with With Jim Harding, whom he code-named humor— sometimes devastatingly "Green Hornet," Comey sometimes called flavored," says David Brower, president of himself Broderick, because Harding had Friends of the Earth. "If he had lived a little once accused him of looking like longer, he might have shamed some Broderick Crawford in All the King's Men. corporate heads into being ethically Comey entered the nuclear controversy responsible. More than anything, we in 1963, when the New York State Electric needed him to take on [James] and Gas Company announced its Schlesinger." intention of building a nuclear reactor on "Electrical utilities building or planning Cayuga Lake, near Cornell, where Comey nuclear-power plants would probably do was director of the Research Institute on well to try to understand David Dinsmore Soviet Science. He became chairman of a Comey and what motivates him," the trade local group worried about thermal journal Nuclear Industry reported in 1973. pollution of the lake. (He was not The journal called Comey "the most concerned yet about reactor safety.) His formidable— because perhaps the most method of attack was worthy of an rational or at least the most sharply ex-dirty-trick artist with the CIA. He focusing — foe of nuclear power." In 1974 studied Who's Who for details about the Environmental Protection Agency members of the board of New York Electric presented Comey with its first annual and Gas, and he interviewed friends of Environmental Quality Award "for services Comey's prophecy board families. He established a profile. M OMNI CONTINUED ONPAQE 134 THE SHRINKING SUN

By MarkR.Chartrand III

Eddy thinks the sun is been larger in the distant past. In fact, only a couple of elusive atomic particles, called Jack neutrinos, are created. They have no elec- shrinking. If it is, this gradual a few million years ago the sun would have contraction could be the current been the size of the entire solar system. trical charge and can pass through most unimpeded. Billions pene- source of all solar energy. It would also be Fossil evidence shows Earth has been matteralmost yet another example ot errant behavior on around far too long, and the Helmholtz- trate your body each second. A neutrino through the earth the part of our local star, which until Kelvin theory had to be dropped. could pass completely recently we thought was well behaved, Over the years other ideas popped up: with only one chance in 10 billion of being detect neutrinos with This sun's energy source has long been Meteors might hit the sun and heat it, but stopped. Yet we can a subject of study. Most of the ancients there aren't enough meteors to do the job. surprisingly little trouble. simply thought of the sun as a glowing ball Radium and uranium fission could Physicists from Brookhaven National on Long Island, recently built a or disk. Others thought it was a huge produce heat, but there isn't enough of Laboratory, far piece of burning wood. The Industrial these elements in the sun. Some neutrino "telescope" in a gold mine in South Dakota to shield it Revolution ushered in the image ol a lump subatomic process might do it, but no one underground of coal, But wood and coal were much too could think of a mechanism. from normal cosmic rays, which would weak to furnish such heat and light. Finally, in 1938, Hans Bethe discovered give results like those produced by The last half of the nineteenth century a series of nuclear reactions that could neutrinos. If the sun is heated by fusion. certain and the first part of the twentieth saw a explain the enormous amounts of solar the experiment should detect a vigorous debate. The German Hermann energy that are produced at the number of neutrinos per day. von Helmholtz and the Englishman Baron 15-million-degree-Celsius temperature What the scientists found was only a fifth Kelvin proposed that the sun was known to exist at the heart of the sun. of the number expected. shrinking. A large gas sphere, such as the Bethe's scheme has been found to apply There could be several explanations. sun, can shrink, turning gravitational in larger stars than our sun, and the fusion We may not understand the physics of potential energy into heat energy. The sun of light elements to make heavier ones, neutrino production or detection. Or the would have to shrink only a very, very small releasing energy, is operative in the sun. temperature inside the sun — and hence fires amount each year to supply all the energy Or so we have thought. the rate at which the nuclear produce is lower than thought. we measure coming from it. In the string of nuclear reactions that energy— much we correct. But if it were shrinking, it would have eventually produce helium from hydrogen, Both may be Enter Jack Eddy's discovery He looked into measurements of the sun's size made at England's Greenwich Observatory from 1863 to 1953. The original data were collected by measuring the edges of the sun to determine solar time very precisely. What Eddy found was a slight shrinkage, about 0.1 percent per century. That's only about 13.7 kilometers per year, but more than enough to supply the solar energy by the mechanism Helmholtz and Kelvin proposed long ago. Perhaps the nuclear fires are banked, or temporarily turned off. Perhaps gravity alternates with nuclear power in providing the energy. Other studies over the past century hint that the sun's energy output may be becoming slightly reduced. Over the past few billion years the sun's energy cannot have varied very much, or we wouldn't be

here now. But maybe it varies a little. The situation is anything but clear. Eddy has fomented a revolution in solar physics. Our complacency about our parent star has been shattered, and the answers are not yet in. But solar physics

thought. Now it seems they've gone out. has again found a place in the sun. DO a

BUNDED BYTHE BLIGHT

By Dr. Bernard Dixon

^^ i'nen the impossible is showed that an incredible degree of experiment, to be incorrect." Cobb writes I (eliminated, what must be left inbreeding would have been necessary to in The Ophthalmic Optician (Vol. 19, page wv vvis the truth, however produce the observed frequency of color 262). "This, I suppose, is where any improbable," Sherlock Holmes once told blindness. Not only would the number of self-respecting scientist should go and his loyal assistant, Dr. Watson. It's not "illicit relationships" have been hang himself, or at least have a good every day that a scientist cites this unbelievably high, but conditions such as think." aphorism in a learned journal, but an eye hemophilia would have reached such As the scope of the survey broadened, specialist at the University of Glasgow did epidemic levels as to create a major a link with immigration from Ireland just that. The quotation was highly public-health problem in the section of became more and more convincing. That apposite, because his story— and its Scotland under Cobb's scrutiny was the common factor in all of the areas conclusion — has more in common with an Was there really any ophthalmological where defective color vision was unusually adventure of the great English detective significance in Roman Catholicism? Do prevalent. But the theory was not yet fully than with the sober deliberations of many adherents of this church generally have a supported. Cobb needed to look al present-day researchers. higher incidence of color blindness? Or another region, one where the population The tale began when Stephen Cobb were the inhabitants of the area could be divided into Celtic and was lecturing young teachers about descended from a population non-Celtic, on a basis entirely separate defective color vision. He alerted them to disproport cna:ely a"! ctecl by this from any religious affiliation. He was able the possible damaging influence of this condition? Widening his field of study, to do that on several Hebridean islands, handicap on their students' careers and Cobb turned to another school, which he where he maintained a practice and'could explained how to diagnose it with the understood was in a cosmopolitan area of simply ask about the forebears of people dotted Ishihara plates. Glasgow. There he discovered that 17 visiting him for an eye examination. The The following week a teacher reported percent of the males were color-blind. results confirmed Cobb's hypothesis. The to him that 5 of the 15 boys in her class Then it turned out that he had been ophthalmologist is now convinced that and 2 of the 14 girls were color-blind. This wrong about the history of the area, which there are many communities in Scotland seemed rather unlikely because earlier in fact contained a significantly large where defective color vision is strikingly surveys had shown the rate of color proportion of people descended from common, and these are composed of folk blindness to be minimal in that part of those who migrated to Scotland from descended from Irish immigrants arriving Scotland. Cobb asked the teacher to Ireland after the Irish "troubles" at the turn at the turn of the century. check her results. A week later she of the century. "I had asked the right But why? Just as the potentially fatal contacted him once more. She had tested question for the wrong reasons, found the sickle-cell trait protects carriers against all the students in the school, and fully 29 right result, and interpreted it wrongly until malaria, the abnormality of color vision

percent of the boys and 6 percent of the I [went] back . . . and found my initial may have become more common, by

selection, it girls were color-blind. assumption, on which I had based the among people on whom Still far from convinced. Cobb and the conferred some unrelaied advantage. Mo head of his university department, such benefit could be found. Then one Professor Ralph Pickford, decided to of Cobb's students, James Birney, investigate for themselves. The result? In suggested another explanation — all but one case the previous diagnosis of fantastic one, but one that has stood up to defective color vision was borne out. critical scrutiny. The political troubles in At this point the researchers could think Ireland coincided with the horrendous of only two remotely plausible failure of the potato harvest. Conceivably, explanations for the astonishing number of many of the people who left Ireland were pupils at the school handicapped in this those who, because of defective color way Perhaps close inbreeding had vision, could not pick out the good occurred over several generations on the potatoes from the bad. At first, Cobb and estates from which most of the children Birney treated this as a flippant flight of came. Second — an even more bizarre fancy. Now they are less inclined lo be so notion — perhaps the very high proportion dismissive. The number of immigrants at of Roman Catholics among the students the time of the blight, and the genetic was an-influential factor. Could religion be analysis of their descendants, does linked to defective color vision? indeed suggest that Birney's idea may be

It soon became evident that the first correct. Facf, to be sure, is often stranger idea was absurd. Cobb's calculations than I'ction.DQ ia OMNI FILM THE ART5 By James Delson

Omni's first issue a year ago I out during Omni's first year were generally that if a film has spirit and charm, its Insurveyed the upcoming science-fiction low-budget spinoffs of Star Wars, with little shoddy effects, production values, and and fantasy films. That column covered original thought given to character, effects, nonexistent acting can be overlooked. a total of 26 pictures, only a fraction of the or plot. Space Cruiser (Toei Company, The element of wonder so essential io 72 already released at the time of this Ltd.) presented an animated story this kind of film, was sorely lacking in most writing. This month we'll update last year's of intergalactic warfare between of 1979's space operas, and its absence list and look at what's in store for 1980. sophisticated alien ships and the World made them more wooden and less

Though science-fiction films have only War II Japanese battleship Yamato, raised charming than they should have been. It begun to establish themselves as serious from the floor of the Pacific and refitted for doesn't take a big budget to create drama, tney have proved fiscally sound. space travel. The Shape of Things to character or to simulate hardware, as One SF film or another topped Variety's Come (Allied Artists), bearing virtually no evidenced by Dark Star, the cult favorite weekly list of 50 top-grossing films more resemblance to the outstanding film made that cost under $100,000 in 1975. than half the time. An average of 2 pictures in the 1930s under the guidance of H. G, Most important, most anticipated, and appeared in the top 5, 3 in the top 10, and Wells, was produced in Canada with most welcome of the films now in 5 in the top 20 weekly for the past year. bargain-basement effects and production production is 7ne Empire Strikes Back! Though none of these films has values. The others were no better. (20th Century-Fox), the sequel to Star garnered the incredible box-office profits" Battlestar Galactica (Universal), Buck Wars. Reuniting the original cast (with the of the earlier Star Wars and Close Rogers (Universal), and Destination: voice of Alec Guinness), the new film Encounters of the Third Kind, several, Moonbase Alpha (ITC). a feature-length features more mythic creatures, battle's on notably Superman, Moonraker, Alien, The version of the Space; 1999 series, were an ice planet, and effects that promise to Amityville Horror, and Love at First Bite, originally produced for television, then outdo those of the original. Hold your grossed between $30 million and $100 shown in movie houses to capitalize on breath until May 25. million each. Another dozen grossed more popular interest. Though their excellently Most of the big-budget hardware films than $10 million, and 12 more topped produced special effects worked on now in production have had their share of $5 million at the box office. These television, the enormous blowup to the big postponed starting dates, replaced unprecedented figures have made 1979- screen lacked the detail and excitement of directors, dismissed effects teams, and the most successful year in the history of films produced for release to theaters. By canceled openings. Much of this trouble science-fiction and fantasy films. comparison, the rerelease of the original could have been avoided had there been Buck Rogers (Crystal Pictures) proved proper preparation, which the rush to beat SPACE OPERAS one another to the screen brushed aside. Following the awesome Star Wars. But Star Trek: The Motion Picture released in May 1977, it's hardly a surprise (Paramount), The Black Hole (Disney), that no film has been able to match its Meteor (American International), Saturn 3 thrills and excitement, although 11 have (ITC), and Flash Gordon (Dino De tried in the past year. The best in the field, Laurentiis) are all finally on their way to Alien (20th Century-Fox) and Moonraker general release. (United Artists), were original in concept, The sole low-budget entry confirmed in artful in presentation, and effective as the space race is Battle Beyond the Stars lightweight summer entertainment. (New World), a derivation of Akira The incestuous nature of the Kurosawa's The Seven Samurai. Other special-effects field was obvious. inexpensive space operas will appear Moonraker's director, Derek Meddings, Ihroughout the year from Italy. Japan, and was winner of this year's Academy Award the United States. You can expect revivals learn that for Superman , and Men's team shifted of classics as distributors over almost intact to The Empire Strikes audiences want to see good films, not just Backl Additional nods go to the new ones. outstanding creative talents of director ALIEN INVASIONS Ridley Scott for his marvelous vision of space in Alien and to Ken Adam, Films about alien invaders have usually production designer of Moonraker, the been low-budget horror quickies, with a most complex film in the very complex biped monsler carrying off a scientist's James Bond series. daughter and with the rest of the world The remaining space operas brought Mateor i.'ie i'v;,ai ;:.' ia'"; 'rOrion), the first film

release, it has been playing once or twice a experiments to resurrect the Third Reich in written and directed by Marshall week in midnight shows across the country The Boys from Brazil (20th Century-Fox); Brickman, will examine computer ever since. A marvelous, campy musical more Ubermensch medicine to create manipulation. ~ water-breathing soldiers in Shock Waves satire on science- fiction films, with book, THE SUPERNATURAL music, and lyrics by Richard O'Brien, the (Cinema Shares International); a mutant film has grossed well over $12 million to created by industrial waste in Prophecy Receiving only average attention before date. (Paramount); and an astronaut afflicted its midsummer opening. The Amityville With the film companies putting their big with a disease that forces him to eat Horror (American International) has turned money for the next season behind space human flesh or else disiniegrafe in The out to be one of the year's top-grossing operas, little was lett over for horror Incredible Melting Man (American films. A "true" story about a house

chillers. The Dark (Cinema Shares International). containing the "entrance to hell,"' it was International) was originally planned as a Next year's films seem primarily dramatically disappointing because once project for Tobe (The Texas Chainsaw concerned wifh the brain, but other the entrance was shown, no one had the Massacre) Hooper, but Hooper dropped focuses share the spotlight. Altered States guts to go and see what things were like out just before shooting began, leaving the (Warner Bros.) presents a somewhat down there. Perhaps in a sequel? rest of the production team to cope with an metaphysical transformation of man into Other major tales this year included alien who chops off people's heads or kills primate. Directed by Ken Russell from a Carpenter's Halloween (Coinpass them with his laser vision. The Gendarme screenplay and novel by Paddy International), a film that cost $320,000 but and the Extraterrestrials, a French comedy Chayefsky, with special effects by John that has grossed 50 times that at.the box

about aliens invading the Riviera, has Dykstra, it looms as one of the year's major office. Its ratio of dollars spent to dollars already outgrossed Superman in France. pictures. Meltdown is a nuclear-accident earned makes Carpenter the most Time Warp (Compass International) will be drama written and directed by John successful filmmaker of the year. Dawn ot atale of intergalactic travel through a Car center, one of the hottest young the Dead (United Film Distributors), the "dimensional whirlpool." Foes suggests * directors in the business since his second of the three "Dead" films directed

that flying saucers are still visiting Earth. successes with Dark Star, Assault on by George Romero, grossed audiences Precinct Thirteen, and Halloween. out for the sheer amount of blood and* SCIENCE GONE AWRY Originally scheduled for Carpenter but brains spilled and made a tidy profit at the

Despite all the publicity nuclear power now lacking a director is Brainstorm same time. The Exorcist (Warner Bros.)

has received in recent years, it took two (Sandy Howard Productions), a murder was reissued this summer with a newly accidents to bring the problem to the fore mystery with genetic overtones. Death mixed sound track, which improved its

this year. If The China Syndrome had been Watch deals with neurological death in a already excellent production values. And

released after the Three Mile Island deathless society. Human Experiments though it received little notice from general

accident, it would have been considered-a examines a psychotic prison psychiatrist audiences, The Wicker Man was a remarkable story of paganism by Anthony Schaffer, author of Sleuth. Most supernatural stories seem to emerge from the woodwork, play out their brief runs, and then migrate to television; they don't have a lot of advance publicity. Only two films of any consequence have been announced in this genre. Stanley Kubrick, the world's leading director, even though he produces films only two or three times a decade, is readying The Shining (Warner Bros.) for showing next spring. Based on the terrifying novel by Stephen King, the Kubrick film stars Jack Nicholson and Shelley Duvall. Carpenter, who is suddenly everywhere at once, is presenting his new supernatural suspense film, The Fog (Avco Embassy), early in the year Whether by coincidence or through timely planning, the past year has seen 12 vampire films in circulation. The best of the lot, John Badham's Dracula (Universal), starred Frank Langella as the count and Laurence Olivier as his nemesis. Van Helsing. With stylish, though misdated, sets and costumes and excellent matte

In Saturn 3, robols both help and hir.rle; -Jig film's s'.urs: work for the backgrounds, the film just 22 OMNI , — "

missed being a classic. Though many in afriendly light. Genesis, produced for thought the campy vampirism of Love at the William L McKnight Omnitheatre of the First Bite (American International) would Minnesota Science Museum, was an :: £ i. : e be too ghoulish for a mass audience, it incredible success. Gizmo! (New Line) turned out to be one of Ihe year's biggest was a history of creative inventions. The hits. Late Great Plane! Earth (Pacific The other films in this year's cycle of International), narrated by Orson Welles, vampire pictures comprised a mixed bag featured predictions from the last book Oddball of comedy drama, and rip-off. Werner of the New Testament and a !=*r>ng Herzog's almost shot-for-shot remake semidocumentary iook at the end of the

(20th Century-Fox) of F. W. Murnau's silent world. No Ac! o! God (National Film Board classic Nosferatu was a lifeless letdown. of Canada) stirred up a controversy in The only saving grace of three cheapo Canada because of its forecast that the exploitation films, Mary Mary, Bloody spread of nuclear power could lead to an Mary, Vampire Hookers (Capricorn Three), increase in terrorism. a'nd Nocturna (Compass International), The Space Movie , the only upcoming was John Carradine's playing Dracula in documentary on the list, is a compilation of all of them. Nightwing (Columbia) was a U.S. and Russian space footage, with tale of vampire bats. Count Dracula and music by Mike Oldfield. It's being billed as His Vampire Bride, starring Christopher "the most expensive film ever made" Lee and Peter Gushing, the leading lights because of the amount of money that was of the horror-film field, was a disappointing spent in putting the cameras into space to begar :: z =. ;: = :e :: .-.eaht -.' story with dated effects. Thirst was the first photograph its wonders budge:; r= : : : "" - ==-= Australian vampire film, and The True Story are d: " : FANTASY of Dracula, a Romanian picture, was the a.'?;: .":t £ -:- - first historical reenactment of the life of Fantasy films are slowly gaining in Z--:_--- : := Vlad the Impaler, who inspired the Dracula budgets, creativity, and audience levels Stever S: e : : e~ legend. and may rival the hardware film for House me Second*] " : Though no further vampire films have leadership during the t980s. There are nerc s~ L :;:;: story begun production, four pictures have three reasons why fantasy is on the rise: by V _= -: :-::.:f been announced: Divorce, Vampire Style, Superman (Warner Bros.), the most 'The Da, -~e _i:: -~z ~,^ Love First Bite; Interview popular film of the past year; Lord of the TftiSS"" a sequel to at -" Rings (United Artists), which proved the of efferts-:- e~ e: with the Vampire (Paramount), based on ~ _ the best-seller by Anne Rice; Sa'em's Lot potential of animation in mass-market Advent— Zr : e (Warner Bros.), based on Stephen King's adventures; and Quintet (20th story in when ty«g ca ' novel; and an untitled film to be directed Century-Fox), which, although a scBze=- -'• .; '- for American International by Roger box-office failure, was the first of the new (Warne'5-< "f '.'."-£" Vadim. fantasy films to attract the talents of a fror : . i . ~~- ' leading "art" director. Robert Altmair. Adventj'B and DOCUMENTARIES Some other popular films this year were Phoenix a ctassca ac ra-ng Neglected for the past decade, the Time after Time (Warner Bros.), Nicholas Richard - = documentary seems to be on the Meyer's fanciful tale of H. G. Wells chasing S;-£-;_-: --,- KG are - - _ =:" : :-e ascendancy again, especially in science. Jack the Ripper through time; Suoe—i- . Dolphin was a well-intentioned but Americathon (United Artists), a comic Titans (MGWi 3~\^n*or—DD*3r > — ~- overlong attempt to portray the creatures swipe at telethons, the government, and extravsgs"z= iz^-z e~z" z L maste'a' =~~ -- -= z~ie~ ~-e " Final Z:.' ~zz ' = "= z nuclear ccr^xearar sEr-nc * it Douglas 7he Z}^asr~ass Concj_scn a -- British ie= e: :e = . : "z -or theater :^;i " - I z -: -~ :

"~~- : Seme,: "t"t _" - i z z-z story wrtn ovenones 3 WT^yawe sirring - Christop^e =.. r I z^—=r Due to ene* orooucxr- *trv fte iext "" r '— = yea- s = z : :: .r^ _ sua™:- ;; :-:.:> "^i: :'--.". and the Knigtns of tm Sxrc Soe O-on). a retelling of the Arthurian legend by director Bcormar Dune £Xna DeLaurentiis). w*h ascreenpQy by Frank Herbert, based on his rower Conan (Dino DeLaurentiiS), the uttnate r< sword and sorcery, now bang prepped far snooting

by director Milius: .'. Rooot (Warner Bros.), an adaptation c; isaac As*ncv's stories; and possibly the year s most ozarre project, a lavish, toe-action musical version of Pqpeye. under Atmans direction, with a screenplay by Juies Feiffer and music by Harry Niisson,

H. G. Wells pursues Jack the Ripper through Ihe cemuum ."> Nicholas Meyer's Time after Time. starring Robin Williams OO

24 OMNI It's five miles wide... it's coming at 30,000 m.p.h.... ami there's no place on Earth to hide!

U7_L T*

ISlHIU/tBlflffll/SllBlllS SEANMINIMCOHHEHY - HATA1JE WDOD jii

"-'.=if!e hehsmn uumenee rosenthal "?»»

;: ARNOLD 0RG0L1M THEODORE PARVIN '"JNMlif;; PEAKING ENGLISH IN SPACE

By Patrick Moore

Last July 18 the Soviet Union sent '.now aT/hung about our civil zation. will most probably choose English. the first fuil-sized radiotelescope Powerful radio transmissions tirst left Earth Let's assume that a "manned" probe into space. The device, KRT 10, is much less than a century ago and have has arrived from some planet orbiting a a ten-meter parabolic antenna backed by not yet penetrated far into space. To a distant star. (Just how it makes the journey sensitive multichannel receivers and every being on a planet circling the star Alkaid, is irrelevant. Assume that they use other "mod con." It was taken up by the 210 light-years away, Earth would still be teleportation, if you like.) The first thing our unmanned space freighter Progress 7 and absolutely "radio quiet." visitors will do is hide until they find out just turned over to cosmonauts Vladimir And yet, according to modern physics, what kind of beings we are. If they arrive in Lyakov and Valeri Ryumin in the Salyu! 6 radio is our only hope of picking up an the middle of a global war. tney may station. It is being used in partnership with intelligent signal from space. Sending decide to sneak away and hope that we a 70-meter dish located in the Crimea. an interstellar probe woud take too remain isolated.

The system has one telling advantage long — roughly 50 years even for nearby If they decide to approach us, though. over previous equipment. The longer an Alpha Centauri— even if we had the their best technique is not hard to figure. antenna system's "baseline," the distance technology and funds to accomplish it, But Beings intelligent enough to make an between its separate radiotelescopes, the radio is too slow for much dialogue. The interstellar voyage without taking more detail it can perceive. And at times most we can hope from it is to establish.the thousands or millions of years about it KRT 10 and the Crimean instrument will be existence (or, more accurately, the former should surely have no trouble learning our separated by a lull 10,000 kilometers. The existence] of another civilization. speech, Still unannounced, they will combination should be able to pinpoint If it's quick, convenient exchanges we monitor our radio and television stations. • small radio sources very precisely, want, we must look into such exotic recording our languages. Eventually, they diameters. teleportation. perhaps even to measure their techniques as telepathy and will select one to use in contacting us. I

Personally I'd like to look iurther into the I am no believer in flying saucers, but I propose English partly because it is used radiotelescope's future in space. Will they doubt that contact by one of these all over the world and partly because, as technologies Quite of ever pick up intelligent signals from other unproved s out the an Englishman. I find it much more logical stars? That s their greatest promise. question. (In fact. I would not even than any other tongue. The trouble is, light pokes along at a discount the possible existence of flying Picture the scene aboard the alien mere 300,000 kilometers per second. saucers. I simply don't believe that there is ship: Linguists will hold earnest classes. Send a message to, say, Tau Ceti — one of any valid proof that we have been visited Crew members will struggle to pronounce the nearest stars similar to our sun and by them. We may yet find such proof.) our words recognizably. Conversations will one that could well be ringed with Then what about communication? I'd be held, and tests will be administered. At planets — and you can't hope lor a reply in like to suggest a possibility thai may last there will be enough English-speakers less than 22 years. If Tau Cetians could sound outrageous. I maintain that it is to cope with any emergency. Then they

if pick up our television programs, they entirely sensible. I believe that aliens can will reveal themselves. would not yet have seen Neil Armstrong get in touch with us directly - and have Of course they will face problems other step out onto the surface ot the moon. any wish to do so— they will contact us in than language, esoec ally ii tney look too

Beyond about 70 light-years, no one can some recognizable language; and they completely inhuman. But if the alien ship can land, blaring out greetings in plain English, we will at least have proof that we are dealing with beings as rational and intelligent as we are. In fact, they will almost certainly be a great deal more rational.

Today this is only a fantasy. Someday it could be far more. When contact is made,

if it is made, language will be a vital key to interstellar friendship. An alien who steps from his spacecraft, waves his tentacles, and says, "Wzzzk bdoj oofgj?" will be met

with fear. If he bows politely and says,

"Good morning. I am from Delia Pavonis C. May we disembark, please?" he will be treated wilh respect. radiotelescope; the is.the a USSR's Ratari-600 world's largest At least, I hope he will. DO ALIEN METAi UFD UPDATE By Harry Lebelson

Physical evidence remains the pcwde r y substance was seen in the spectrographic laboratory for analysis. For decisive factor in the search for cracks of the samples. unknown reasons, the entire piece was results could UFOs, but would finding it really Upon receiving the pieces, Fontes kept burned before conclusive be be enough to prove their existence? one and sent the two others to APRO in obtained. The air force requested another refused the request. People assume lhat if the evidence itself Tucson, Arizona. In an attempt to analyze sample, but APRO were alien to anything we know on Earth. the material, Fontes submitted his sample The next series of tests was conducted by verification ol its being extraterrestrial to the National Department of Mineral the Atomic Energy Commission's Oak National Laboratory another would be immediate. If, however, the Production of the Agriculture Ministry of Ridge on article were made of materials familar to Brazil, Dr. Luisa tvlariaA. Barbosa, a portion of sample 2, The results of this that 2 less us. its authenticity would likely be chemist-technologist, reported that "the analysis showed sample was doubted. soecirographic analys s snowed the _pure than sample 1 was reported to be by This problem surfaced recently when presence of magnesium of a high degree .'the Brazilian scientists. A comparison of Omni acquired two metal samples of purity and the absence of any other .the test results of all three samples shows purported to be extraterrestrial. The metallic element." To ensure the accuracy that each varies in purity. bizarre circumstances surrounding their of this report, an additional In his 1969 study of the Ubatuba discovery led the magazine to commission spectrographic analysis was made by magnesium samples, Dr. Walter W Walker, an analysis of the samples by the Els'on Teixeira. He stated that "'the who has a Ph.D. in metallurgy, stated, "The Massachusetts Institute of Technology spectrographic analysis identified the Ubatuba magnesium has been widely (MIT) in Cambridge. But to understand unknown metal as magnesium and acclaimed as direct physical evidence of of UFOs. better the significance of both specimens, showed it to be absolutely pure. No the extraterrestrial nature But. as some background regarding their impurity or other mcta was detected in the of the present, after more than a decade of extraterrestrial nature of appearance is in order. sample analyzed; even trace elements, investigation, the The most intriguing of the two usually found with any metal, were not the Ubatuba material has yet to be disproved. specimens is the U.batuba, Brazil, present." Additional analyses were made conclusively proved or The magnesium sample, reputed to be part of of the metal, two of which were done by lack of subsequent verification of the an unidentified flying object that exploded the Brazilian Army and Navy. The results of Ubatuba purity has been the reason that off the coast of Brazil in 1957. The other these additional tests are unknown, all investigations to date have discounted specimen, a seven-centimeter metallic bar however Unfortunately, because of extraterrestrial origin." Walker continues: line of etched with symbols, allegedly extensive laboratory testing, sample 1 has "Little further study along the materialized in the Charleston, South been completely oxidized. chemical analysis would be fruitful. It is Carolina, home of William Herrmann, The Meanwhile, in the United States. APRO, also apparent that the structural aspects metal ingot is supposedly a "gift of which had possession of the two of the Ubatuba samples have been friendship" from extraterrestrial visitors. remaining samples, submitted a portion of ignored. These are the aspects that show On September 14, 1957. Ibrahim Sued, sample 2 to a U.S. Air Force the most promise for further study." a well-known Rio de Janeiro columnist, Now, ten years later, the controversy still received a strange letter from one of his persists. Advocates and detractors alike readers. A fisherman who was fishing with continue to voice their opinions. Carl some friends near the town ot Ubatuba, Sagan. a professor of astronomy at Cornell Sao Paolo, Brazil, reported that they had University, states, "There have been seen a disk maneuvering at unbelievable debates on the purity of magnesium speeds in the sky. Suddenly the object samples from purported crashed UFOs, made a sharp upward turn, climbed but their purity was within the competence rapidly, and exploded into flames, sending of American technology at the lime of the thousands of fiery fragments into the sea. incident." Yet a two-page CIA A small number of these pieces fell close foreign-intelligcr.ee information report, to the beach and were picked up by the obtained under the Freedom of fishermen. Three small fragments were Information Act and dated January 29, sent to Sued, who sent them to the iate Dr. 1976, states, "There is a rumor that Olavo Fontes. the Brazilian representative fragments of a possible UFO found in of the Aerial Phenomena Research Brazil bore a relationship to super- Organization (APRO). The fragments were conductors and magneto- of a fissured, dark gray, and highly hydrodynamics." oxidized metallic substance. A white Ubatuba magt't&i:!:: 'ragmsni aria'yzed ty Mi I. Omni's own efforts to clarify the mystery 30 OMNI CONTINUED ON PAGE 132 coruTinjuurui

THE EMPEROR'S NEWCDTHE

fabled emperor was sold a bill o( goods— fast -talked But House Speaker Tip O'Neill would brook no dishabiile on Theinto laying out a lot of gold for some fancy threads that the House floor When Representative Jim Mattox, casually de- didn't exist. The swindling salesman told him that only void of jacket and tie, tried to discuss the subject of casual people with very fine taste could actually see the fabu- summer dress in Congress, the speaker refused to recognize :>js garments, and the emperor took the bait. Like him, the entire him, saying, "I will ask the gentleman from Texas to remove -oyal entourage and palace guard refused to admit that they himself from the floor and return in proper dress, The gentleman wouldn't seethe invisible outfit, called it the dernier cri, and sent can address the House at such time as he is in the proper dress.

if jbe emperor out on parade in his birthday suit. Only when a little The gentleman is embarrassing the chair. I don't know he is- Doy in the crowd shouted out that the emperor was naked did embarrassing himself." (And both of them Democrats!) When it anyone react to the already obvious fact. got around to a formal vote on the matter later that same after- Unfortunately, however, nobody was taken by the prime minis- noon (July 17, just one day after the new ruling took effect), the ter's new clothes, which were not only tangible but sensible. House trounced all hope of working in shirt sleeves, 303 to 105. Earlier this year, in the heat of the Japanese June, Prime Minister "I still say there's no need for a rag around your neck and the Masayoshi Ohira appeared before press photographers and like in these temperatures," Mr. Mattox said heatedly. "The Presi- Television cameras, modeling a suit of clothes with a short- dent said change our ways, and we could have done it and seta s i eeved jacket, designed for businessmen to wear in un-air- mighty good example for the rest of the nation," ;onditioned offices. The prime minister's new clothes were a call Meanwhile restaurant and theater owners begged unsuccess- that they to action in a country that has no oil of its own and that is fully to be exempted from the regulations, so could experiencing a fuel shortage. But the idea fell flat. Sales of the compete with the comfort level of private homes. They argued energy-saving" jacket were abysmally low. And Mr Ohira himself that patrons would rather cook coo! than eat out and that hot Special dispensation eventually renounced it. critics would pan the best of Broadway.

if Mr Ohira sweated through the summer while air conditioning was granted, however, to hospitals, elementary schools, *as cut back, at least he had lots of company. The Japanese museums, hotels, and buildings for equipment, plants, or ani- ^or&gn Ministry urged diplomats to forsake jackets and ties, but mals that require special temperatures. Any employer or em- none of them did. At the Dai-lchi Kangyo Bank, the largest in ployee who suggested that human beings fit that latter category _apan, employees were told not to wear neckties at work, unless was rebuffed with a Hurry of data from scientific investigations cf course they handled a tie manufacturer's accounts. (Despite proving otherwise. Even the American Society of Heating, Re- ms courtesy, the Kansai Cooperative of Necktie Commerce and frigerating and Air Conditioning Engineers said that genuine 86° ndustry boycotted the bank because of its no-necktie edict and impairment of human performance doesn't set in below R •egistered a complaint with the Ministry of International Trade.) All the experts offered the same advice to sufferers: "Wear Here in the United States, where the oil situation and the less," they said. But the people wore more. Caught between the summer weather were just as troublesome, conservative at- oil magnates, the dress codes of the workplace, and the manu- itudes kept most people from being able to tolerate conservation facturers of ties and pantyhose— and lacking leadership to cast n comfort. First, President Carter decreed that public places off their layers— they just wilted. should be no cooler than 78° R which raised the question, "What The wintertime energy conservation ruling, which limits am- temperatures to 65° is much easier to take, since snail I wear?" to a new level of importance, The President's bient indoor R esignated new secretary of Energy, Charles W Duncan, Jr., long underwear, sweater vests, jackets, extra socks, or the like 'esponded appropriately: He smiled and stripped off his jacket can make up for a flagging thermostat without flouting fashion. *nite the Senate Energy Committee debated his confirmation in a When warm weather returns next summer, though, we'll have to sweltering hearing room. face the stickier questions all over again. —DAVA SOBEL " coruTiruuurm

SUPERSAURUS leg bones have been un- CLOSE SHAVE nod or turn of the head to be earthed, Jensen estimates excruciating. Vital statistics: height, 50 the leg height at 18 feet. Shaving every day is a The cure? Simple. Grow a feet; length, 80 to 90 feet: The Colorado dinosaur nuisance for any man, but beard. Unless, of course, weight, 80 to 90 tons. No, it's was a brachiosaurid, a blacks in the armed forces you're in the army now. Then not a ferryboat or an apart- member o( a group of may find it painful, you may have to fight for ment house, but a dinosaur plant-ealing dinosaurs with that right. discovered last summer in a columnlike legs, long. Repeatedly black ser- slope of the Rocky Moun- giraffelike necks for reach- vicemen have brought suit tains in western Colorado, ing foliage on trees, and against the military, charging

Not only is it the biggest di- small heads with small that its shaving regulations nosaur ever found; it is the brains. Until recently only are discriminatory. (Shaving biggest land animal as well. one was known, a 40-foot- bumps may occur among Paleontologist Dr James high animal found in Africa whites, but they are rarely as A. Jensen, of Brigham Young whose skeleton is now in a painful.) University, in Provo, Utah, museum in Beriin, Germany !y now, according to a who found the huge reptile, In 1972, near the site where spokesman for the National says it could have peered in he is now digging, Jensen Association tor the Advance- a top-floor window of a five- round an eight-foot-long ment of Colored People, story building, supposing brachiosaurid shoulder the NAACP's Military and that one existed 140 million blade from a beast bigger Veterans' Affairs Office has. years ago, when the di- than the African specimen standard operating pro- nosaur was alive. but smaller than his most re- cedures for helping enlisted Thus far Dr Jensen has cent find. men with a medical need to found the animal's shoulder He thinks that the Col- go bearded, blade, nine feet long; a rib orado giants probably died vertebra, four and a half feet near the banks ot a river and "Learning is discovering that long; a neck vertebra, about that their bones were Ac! or Jim B'Q.-vi' models cure lor something is possible." shaving the same length; and ribs pushed downriver in a "bone bumps: A beard. -Fritz Perls ten feet long. Although no jam," which was later cov- infection-producing, and ered by a mountain. ThB de- even litigation-provoking. PREGNANT MEN posit has been eroding, and To get the close shave that

some bones may have dis- military regulations require, a If a woman without a appeared. Next year Jensen man has to pull his face taut uterus can carry and bear a will be back at the site for the and cut his beard off below child, as happened recently sixth year, looking for more the level of the relaxed skin. in New Zealand, what's to bones from the largest di- If the hair follicles are stop a man from trying to nosaur, curved, which is so tor most become pregnant? Theoreti- "I don't anticipate finding black men, the hair curls as cally, he could donate his

enough bones to put a whole il grows back in, burrowing own sperm for in vitro fertili-

skeleton together, but I Into the skin rather than zation of an egg and have

hope— I live on hope," he heading straight out. The the embryo implanted says. — Barbara Ford skin reacts to the puncture somewhere in his abdomen,

just as it would to a splinter then wait the required time

"The most important fact of wood or metal: It becomes for delivery by Cesarean about Spaceship Earth: an inflamed, sometimes in- section. instruction book didn't come fected, and the infections (The New Zealand woman with it." can become abscesses. was able to give birth de- —Buckminster Fuller Since the neck is the likeliest spite a hysterectomy, be- site for this condition — cause an errant fertilized "Science is the religion of the called shaving bumps or egg lodged in her abdomen, Brachiosaurus mode!: New suburbs. pseudofoliiculitis barbae— where it received enough nu- dinosaur is simitar, but bigger. -William Butler Yeats some sufferers find every trients to grow to term.) 36 OMNI Robert Creasy, M.D, of the PIGEON PILOTS 3D TV air so that it is entirely University of California med- compatible with ical school, is worried that The newest technological Citizens of Sydney, conventional color this idea may take hold of the innovation in sea rescues: Australia, are seeing televisions. The viewer has popular imagination. He is pigeons. In an efiortto something new on station only to buy the special worried because a recent ar- improve the 40-percent TVN-9 these days: glasses, which, according to ticle in the National Enquirer, detection rate of human linking his name to the New helicopter crews at finding Zealand event, brought him survivors at sea, the Naval more mail than he could Oceans Systems Center, in possibly answer, Honolulu, Hawaii, is training "It's theoretically possi- a few pigeons. Researchers ble," Dr. Creasy says, "but believe that the birds, highly dangerous and inap- strapped to the underside of propriate to even attempt the "helicopter, could spot such a thing, in a man or a survivors 90 percent of woman," the time. In the course of normal The birds are being obstetrical practice, he trained to peck at a switch adds, doctors periodically when they see the color see women with embryos orange, often used in life that have implanted them- vests; yellow, the color of selves outside the uterus for most life rafts; and red, from a variety of physiological flares. The switch is reasons, Creasy says the connected to a light in the risk of this condition to the cockpit, telling the pilot mother's health is so great where to look— and which that she should be operated bird to reward with food. upon immediately to remove Douglas Conley a Coast the fetus, — Dava Sobel Guard electronics engineer, three-dimensional color Nat Myers, of the Ancom who conceived the program, television. Wearing special Company. American said the pigeons have keen glasses, viewers can distributor of DOTS, cost eyesight and a long attention perceive depth in what from $2 to $14. span. In tests the pigeons otherwise looks like an The fringing effect can be have spotted a sixteen-inch ordinary flat TV image. produced optically by practice buoy from a Developed by Digital means of filters and lenses helicopter traveling at 100 Optical Technology Systems as well as digitally through a miles an hour 500 feet high (DOTS), of Amsterdam, the computer, allowing the quarter and a mile away. The Netherlands, the system technique to be used in a research program began works by discriminating variety of ditf erent media. about two years ago and will focus and color elements of For instance, using the be ready for operation in the image to produce a digital method, film originally another two years. small fringing of color, barely shot in 2D can be converted Asked why he chose visible to the naked eye, for 3D viewing. Or, by ordinary pigeons, Conley around the edges of the installing the filters in a said, "They're cheap, docile, objects in the image. When conventional camera, 3D and very light." As for the viewed through the glasses, photographs can be taken. proverbial dumbness of which are colored differently — KieranColman pigeons, Conley added, on either side, the scene

"They find the target long appears in three dimensions. "Just because everything is before the pilots do. They Using the DOTS system, different doesn't mean that can't be too dumb." 3D is encoded into the anything has changed." to become pregnant. —Stuart Diamond signal transmitted over the —San Francisco Oracle " conjTiRJuuRn

variables that waste fuel, GAY VACCINE everyone who contracts others, it might also work for with such outside temperature it dies. people afflicted PHC. as humidity engine tem- A possible vaccine lor a Small-scale tests of the It is a long-term study and 40 perature, octane rating, and form of liver cancer is being vaccine, developed at the Liver cancer takes 20 to bursts of speed or tested upon a rather Merck institute for years to develop. What's sudden Thomas unconventional cross Therapeutic Research, in more, Mother Nature may be braking, explains W section of the Wesl Point, Pennsylvania, taking care of the PHC population— gay men. are now under way in the problem herself. Liver The vaccine was originally People's Republic of China, cancer is already tormulated to combat a France, and Korea. Also, a decreasing in Africa, and no sexually transmitted disease series of tests in five one knows why.— Joel Davis called type-B hepatitis, but American cities is using Dr. Baruch Blumberg, of the homosexual men. FUEL SAVER Institute for Cancer Why? Researchers found electronic Research, in Fox Chase, type-B hepatitis to be quite An automatic Pennsylvania, discovered common among gay "tuning" device, called the that the vaccine might also men— in at least 45 percent Optimizer, which can signifi- fuel consump- work for a form of liver of those tested. The disease cantly reduce cancer called PHC. virus is sexually transmitted tion in automobiles, airplanes, heating fur- It seems that areas with a and has been found in many and high incidence of type-B bodily fluids, including saliva naces, has been developed hepatitis also have high and semen. There's also a by engineers at Pennsylva- University. rates of PHC. Now it appears suspicion that the medical nia State thai up to 90 percent of trauma associated with anal "It's like having a me- people with PHC also have intercourse may be involved. chanic under the hood, ask- chronic infections of type-B Researchers such as ing the engine what timing hepatitis. Blumberg obviously hope change is needed, and ad- the timing several PHC isn't common in the that if the vaccine cuts down justing Dr. United Slates, but it is in Asia the incidence of type-B times a second," says in- director of the uni- and in Africa, where nearly hepatitis in gay men and Paul H. Schweitzer, the Collins, ventor and professor versity's electronic services emeritus of engineering re- and coholder of the patent. search. —Alton Blakeslee The Optimizer could cut fuel consumption 10 percent "Once in my life I would like or more in most cars and up to own something outright to 20 percent in cars with before it's broken. I'm always poorly maintained, inefficient in a race with the junkyard! I engines, he says. Not yet on just finish paying for the car the market, each such de- and it's on its last legs. The vice woutd cost about $10 in refrigerator consumes bells mass production, he adds. like a goddamn maniac, A box the size of a minia- They time these things. They ture cassette player, it would time them so when you've be wired to the distributor finally paid for them, they're and electronic ignition or used up. — Willy in Arthur coil. It would reduce Loman gasoline consumption by Miller's Death of a Salesman constantly changing spark- plug timing, then adjusting "The nation that controls the distributor in response to magnetism controls the driving conditions. The Op- universe." Homosexual men. shown here marching for human rights, may hold timizer for —Dick Tracy the key lo the cure of two diseases: hepatitis B and PHC liver cancer. compensates "

UNLEADED PERUVIANS 30 B.C.) mummies. according to Ericson. pruritus researcher for an Lead, the by-product of In terms of world health, operational definition of In the 4,500 years since most metallurgical the significance of the itchiness, and you get: "that humans first mined and processes, is now a enormous increases in which creates the desire to smelted ores to extract their ubiquitous presence in biologic lead levels has yet scratch," according to Dr. precious metals, entire the everything from soil moisture to be studied, but scientists James H. Herndon, Jr., a speculate that sterility and Dallas, Texas, dermatologist. other problems that afflicted Dr. Herndon, former wealthy Romans during the chairman of the dermatology height of the empire may be department at Southwestern attributed to the inordinately Medical School of the high amounts of lead in their University of Texas, said

diet and plumbing systems. itchiness, scientifically, is The Roman poor, whose lead produced by enzymes levels were high, but not as located under the skin. Like high as the aristocrats', pain, he said, itching is a

suffered fewer afflictions. warning sensation: It alerts An ominous sign is that people to insect biles. present-day lead allergies, skin diseases, and contamination, according to other irritations so that they Ericson, is rapidly reaching can take remedial action-. the level of the Roman poor Many pruritus specialists -Kathleen Stein believe that 20 to 30 percent of the victims of severe, ITCHING chronic itchiness— nonspe- cific discomfort with no skin Itchiness is now a marks— are really suffering '.' Her multimillion-dollar industry. from an underlying disease, ition, Surveys have found that such as liver or bone world population has to the reagents and controls sales of itch suppressants disorders. — S.D. sustained increasingly in laboratories. applied to the skin have higher— and potentially "Since prehistory," says reached $11 million a year in more dangerous- Ericson, "we have been the United States. concentrations of lead in faced with someone else's The medical word for teeth and bones. The pollution." itchiness is pruritus, from the skeletons of contemporary The Peruvians have LaWnprurire, meaning "to

Britons and Americans, for proved to be a highly itch. "Curiously, prurire is example, contain more than accurate standard by which also the root of the word 500 times as much lead as to measure lead levels. prurience, which means the normal biologic levels Metallurgy in South America "sexual longing," or, found recently in the bones lagged behind that of the colloquially "the sexual itch." of ancient Peruvians. Old World, and Thus fortified with etymology. Jonathan Ericson, Clair consequently the Andeans one easily sees how some Patterson, and Hiroshi were not exposed to lotions— those containing. Shirahata, writing in the New industrial lead, which is menthol, phenol, or England Journal of absorbed by plants and then camphor— can relieve Medicine, have shown that travels up the food chain. itchiness by substituting a the bones of the Peruvians, In animals lead binds to ling of coldness, as in buried 1,600 years ago, calcium and sites where giving the itch a cold shower. contain ' considerably less calcium is located, such as i fact, the traditional lead than present-day the central nervous system. remedy for itching was an samples, or even samples "It messes about with the ice cube or cold compress. from Ptolemaic Era (323 to electronics of the synapses, Ask a nationally known a coruTiruuuon

drugs" pacemaker wearers in order AGING CLUE villain or whether there's a could develop other sufficient plutonium third factor," Dr. Ordy says. In to halt the accumulation of to obtain for atomic bomb? The Why people age and die fact, the pigment may be a the pigment in the tissues an that is an has been a mystery puzzling "savior." Lipofuscin acts as a and thus arrest the aging answer to hot area," unqualified no. The isotope humans for centuries. Now "sink" for compounds process. "It's a in a pacemaker cannot be two scientists at the Delta formed during the aging says Ordy — J. D. used to make a bomb. NUCLEAR Plutonium-239 is used for PACEMAKERS that. However, the stuff is still poisonous. Only 0.0005 Are nuclear-powered microgram of plutonium-238 pacemakers safe for their is needed to cause severe users? And the users' radiation damage in neighbors? The tentative humans. And a pacemaker answer is yes. considering contains quite a bit more the devices' good safety than that— 160 milligrams, to record since the first be exact, according to Terry plutonium-238 pacemakers Kronher of Medtronics, Inc., were implanted in 1973. Six which makes the devices. years later some 3,000 have For those who are really been implanted worldwide, paranoid, what about the and the medical establish- possibility of a pacemaker ment is now reviewing their user being caught in the success — and short- crossfire of a gunfight, for comings. example, and having his Dr. Victor Parsonnet, of the deadly plutonium supply Newark (New Jersey) Beth scattered to the wind? Not to 8-year-old monkey (left) has as,., _> Israel Medical Center, where worry, says another v-otd (right) is 84 in human terms. the first implantations were Medtronics spokesman; pacemakers have Primate Research Center, in process and may help done, outlined some of the Nuclear Louisiana, think they're hot immobilize enzymes that medical considerations for pacemakers at a on the trail of the culprit— break down cells. nuclear Gellular pigment called But Ordy feels the recent meeting of the lipofuscin. research he and Dr. Brizzee American Heart Association. Called the "wear and tear" are doing shows the Cost and lifetime were pigment, lipofuscin opposite. "Lipofuscin begins among the chief concerns, accumulates in the tissue of accumulating in the tissue but another worry was certain parts of the brain as from birth, when it's about possible contamination from a person grows older one percent. As one gets the plutonium power pack. to according to Drs. Kenneth older it can make up as Such fears now appear be Brizzee and J. M. Ordy, who much as seventy percent of partially ungrounded. recently completed brain the total cytoplasm of a cell. Cancers have developed in studies on 52 rhesus There's got to be some five patients, but none of the monkeys. interference because of tumors was near the power The theory is that a that," he says. unit. Thirteen of the first 15

buildup of lipofuscin may If lipofuscin does turn out patients to receive the units lead to the deterioration of to be the aging "villain," are still alive and well. some sensory, associative, there's hope of a chemical But another concern has and motor functions. But the method to slow or halt the nothing to do with medi- doctors admit they've found aging process, It's known cine—namely, the threat of a correlation, not a that some drugs inhibit terrorism, Could a dedi- connection. "We're not sure lipofuscin accumulation. cated gang of terrorists yet whether lipofuscin is the Ordy says. "In theory, one kidnap and murder enough 40 "OMNI "

been dropped from could be removed with more with flax shipments in the the plant's stem. The eggs airplanes, shot at with restrictions on industrial 1800s, tumbleweed has no hatch into caterpillars that various firearms, and wastes discharged into natural American predators, bore into the weed, stunting heat-tested, and not one ot sewer systems. it spread rapidly from the its growth or killing it. them has ruptured. Sludge handling and dis- Pacific Coast to the Midwest Biological pest control can

In any case, plutcnium posal costs $200 million per and is now moving easiward. be risky. Mongooses pacemakers are being In California the imported into Jamaica to kill replaced by chemical ones, tumbleweed is particularly rats that were destroying the which should hare equally troublesome. "We spend a sugar crop wreaked havoc long life spans and pose less million dollars a year trying to on local fauna. Killer bees potential danger. — J. D. control it or pick it up." said resulted when Brazil Dan Cassidy. of the state introduced a foreign species CATFISH Department of Trans- to improve the honey output portation. of the native bee. But Officials in DeKalb County, Since burning, chopping, Cassidy said he isn't Georgia, have proposed an crushing, and herbicides all worried: "This question is

interesting alternative to an failed to control ihe hardy always put to me. So I asked $85-million sewage- bush, the state hired U.S. the scientists, 'Can these . treatment plant: catfish. Department of Agriculture bugs mutate into something Instead of installing ad- scientists to bring in dangerous in a thousand vanced processing equip- Coleophora parthenica, years?' They said, 'Hell, in a ment, engineers would pipe cream-colored moths that thousand years elephants the partially treated effluent feed only on tumbleweed might have wings.' from the Honey Creek sewer and another pesty plant, the — Allan Maurer plant into ponds. There, the poisonous halogeton. 36 million gallons of daily "Where this moth comes "The aims of scientific sewage would cause algal from," Cassidy said, thought are to see the blooms. Catfish in the ponds "Russian thistle doesn't genera! in the particular and would eat the algae, The cat- become tumbleweed." the eternal in the transitory." fish would multiply. The extra year nationally, or 40 percent Female moths lay eggs on —Alfred North Whitehead catfish would be caught and o! all waste-water treatment. used for chicken feed. The But if the sludge were re- cycle would be completed. claimed and sold as a prod- Sewage, rich in nutrients, uct, its extra costs would be is becoming increasingly all but eliminated, studies promising these days as a indicate. — S.D. future animal food. Since 1975 steers in Denver, Col- TUMBLEWEED WARS orado, have been eating a 4- to 12-percent sludge diet, Thousands of hungry with no perceptible ill effects. Pakistani moths have been In Albuquerque, New imported into California in an Mexico, scientists are effort to control biologically a sterilizing sludge with radia- plant that is not as harmless tion. The sludge is then used as it looks: tumbleweed. as a soil conditioner and Also called Russian feed supplement for sheep thistle, the roly-poly bush is a and cattle. road and fire hazard and a

The sterilization solves the general pain in the drain. It potential health hazard of clogs flood-control pathogens. Another poten- channels, canal waters, and tial hazard, concentration of swimming pools. metals in animal tissues, Imported into this country " "

coruTinjuuRJi

WAR GAMES backs and military vehicles. pennyroyal, peppermint, moderate consumption of If a soldier is "hit," a buzzer and marjoram are favorite mints is negligible. "My The U.S. Army plans to sounds in his ear; a "hit" on a folk medicines. daughter makes popsicles spend about $100 million tank triggers a smoke gre- Basil leaves and Spanish out of mint tea," he during the next three years nade and a loud horn. To en- thyme, among other mints, says. — B.F to arm about 39,000 soldiers sure realism, the coding are also high in certain specifies the range and vitamins and minerals. A few "Jupiter's moons are power of the weapon being mints are good for adding invisible to the naked eye simulated, thus making sure fiber to the diet, particularly and therefore can have no that only a rocket or missile bushmint. influence on the earth, and

can "kill" a tank. MILES also But mints do have a bad therefore would be useless, warns intended victims of side, Last year one person in and therefore do not exist. near-misses. this country died from —Pronouncement made by Xerox designed the sys- consuming oil of pennyroyal, a group of Aristotelian tem for the Department of and deaths due to high contemporaries of Galileo, Defense under a contract concentrations of rosemary following his discovery of from the Naval Training and lavender have been four Jovian moons Equipment Center in Or- reported. The most deadly lando, Florida. However, the toxin in any mint is "I could prove God

first customer was the De- hydrocyanic acid, but it is statistically. partment of Energy's Sandia found in only one, ocimum. —George Gallup Laboratories, where several Coumarin and isobutyric systems are used in training acid are also rather toxic, "They could have done it guards to protect nuclear but fortunately they both are better with an ax." materials (see January 1979 found only in lavender. —George Westinghouse Continuum, page 40). Duke, a mint-tea drinker, (after seeing first — JeffHecht thinks the danger posed by electric-chair execution)

SPICE OF LIFE and 6,000 vehicles with laser "guns." The lasers aren't in- Plants that belong to the tended to hurt anyone, how- mint family not only add ever: They're part oi a sys- spice to life but can also be tem that keeps score in war good for our health, says games, the mock battles in U.S. Department of which soldiers practice their Agriculture botanist Dr combat skills. James A. Duke. The system, called MILES Menthol and thyme, for (Multiple integrated Laser example, are used for Engagement System), is germicides, cough drops, being built by the Xerox and nasal inhalants in Corporation's Electro- modern medicine, and just Optical Systems Division In about every mint from basil Pasadena. California. to water mint turns up in folk The lasers are attached to medicine. weapons that fire blank am- Dr. Duke recently munition. When a gun is compiled a list of mint folk fired, the laser emits harm- remedies for ailments that less pulses of invisible in- start with abscess (ground see-through simulator of a nuclear reactor was the frared light, coded to identify ivy) and end with wounds The world's only "star witness" at a recent congressional subcommittee hearing on Ihe type of weapon. These (hyssop, rosemary, and the Three Mile Island accident. Glen Schoessow, the University of pulses are detected by solar sage, among others). Florida nuclear engineering professor who built the simulator, points cells strapped on soldiers' Besides the above, lavender, out ihe containment structure to Congressman Don Fuqua (center). 42 OMNI The foe/ that could carry us beyond the solar system lies In cold storage near Geneva i^H ANTIMATTER REVEALED

BY ROBERT L. FORWARD

watch the screen. An sky. Dozens of private Youaging beauty in Parts Spacecraft are being boosted ponders the stocks you've into tow Earth orbit by tugs suggested, Space that use the light of Elevator and Anti-ERG. the land-based lasers far brighter new subsidiary oi Space than the sun to heat water to a Power General. Your eyes blazing exhaust too searing wander to the top of the to be called steam. screen. 15:55:03THURSDAY30 The waiting line is long: so JUNE 2033. you go into orbit, using

"Thank God it's Thursday." antimatter, despite its high you mutter as she finally price per microgram. Invisible decides to invest her 35,000 particles of antimatter are credits in Anti-ERG. With mixed with liters of water in the relief, you place the buy order, engines, and the jets flare with make your monthly sales incandescent hydrogen and report to the home office, and oxygen. At the nearest orbital switch off the console as the station, you refill the tank with ^lliPNlSfe-- clock reaches 16:00:00. A four tons of water, replace the hard day's work done, you antimatter with a new deserve the long Fourth of 30-milligram capsule from the July weekend you're about to Anti-ERG station, and take off spend at Luna's glamorous for the marvelous oasis

Sahara Copernicus, with its 382,000 kilometers away in 1111111 sun-baked spas, fabulous space. casinos, and nonstop Any such scenario brings entertainment. up a couple of questions. Isn't You step out into the Arizona antimatter just a science- sunshine, walk over to your AstroCruiser, and make sure

that there is enough water in the tanks and plenty of antimatter in the super- conducting storage bottle. Then you take otf. Its power tightly reined, the Cruiser taxis into the desert, heading for a greenly glaring pillar of tire beaming into the

PAINTING BY MATI KLARWEIN Wrm&W) m fiction writer's dream? Can we really use it bine electric, magnetic, and radio fields to tungsten targets. As the rapidly moving nuclei, as fuel? And if we can use it, how soon? increase the speed of electrons and pro- protons strike the heavy tungsten

It turns out that we can. Even now, an- tons to nearly that of light their energy is converted into a spray of timatter is being made, captured, cooled, The electron volt, or eV, is the unit of mea- gamma rays and a collection of elementary and stored for days at a time, In a little- sure used to describe the energy levels of particles, including antiprotons, antielec- recognized revolution, the human race is particles in accelerators. A metal plate with trons, and antineutrons, which move at learning to harness the ultimate fuel. One of a positive charge of one volt attracts nega- nearly the speed of light. these days antimatter may allow us to travel tively charged electrons. Just before they You'd think that capturing the rapidly the solar system as we now span the globe make contact with the plate, the electrons moving antiprotons would be as impossible in our cars and private airplanes. reach an energy of 1 eV as trying to catch the bees from a kicked- To travel, you must use energy. To pro- Your television set produce's about over hive. But magnetic separators can duce energy, you must convert mass. Every 20.000 volts, or 20 kilovolts (kV), in the pic- easily route the negatively charged antipro- time you burn a liter of gasoline, mass dis- ture tube, The electrons in the tube there- tons into a storage ring. appears. When gasoline is burned, a little fore reach an energy of 20 kilo electron The storage rings are large, doughnut- of its mass is converted into energy, volts (keV), just enough to make the phos- shaped magnets. The antiprotons enterthe

' With chemical fuels like gasoline and phor on the television screen glow. A magnet in a straight beam and are pushed rocket propellants, the amount of mass million-volt machine can accelerate pro- to one side by the powerful magnetic fields. converted to energy is only a few parts per tons and electrons to energies of 1 MeV At 1 Since the field strength inside the magnet billion. In fission reactors using uranium MeV. electrons move close to the speed of is uniform, the beam is bent into a circle and plutonium, the amount of mass con- light. The heavier protons travel at only 5 and the antiprotons orbit endlessly inside verted rises to a few parts per thousand. percent of the speed of light, their much the ring. Last year scientists at CERN The fusion of hydrogen or deuterium con- greater mass compensating for their slower placed a tew hundred antiprotons with an verts almost 1 percent of the mass. Antimat- velocity to give them equal energy. energy of 2,1 GeV in their storage ring, ter outshines all such fuels; fully 100 It is difficult to produce energies greater where they were kept circulating. After percent of its mass is instantaneously nearly four days only about 80 antiprotons converted into energy. were left. The others had been destroyed That brings up some questions: What is when they collided with the few remaining antimatter? And what makes it anti? atoms that contaminated the nearly perfect answer lies in the atom, the knot of vacuum inside the ring. The £The United States, faced protons, neutrons, and electrons from In future experiments at Fermilab, the which the world around us is made. Each of with a Soviet lead, fast-moving antiprotons will be slowed of bundle of raw down before they are stored. After the an- these particles consists a is now developing weapons energy wrapped by nature into a compact, tiprotons are generated, the physicists will that will shoot long-lasting ball that we call matter. It is as if send them through a linear accelerator, each particle had some special quantum down ballistic missiles with which usually boosts the normal protons

holding it together. The before into the big ring. Since the mechanical "glue" high-energy protons. they go type of glue that unites a particle deter- antiprotons have an opposite charge, they mines the amount of energy that can be They can easily be adapted will be "antiboosted"—slowed from 6,000" ol the result- decrease in bound and sets the properties to antimatter production:^ MeV to 200 MeV. Thisthirtyfold ing bundle. Each glue is unique. energy means that the antiprotons, which For each particle there is an antiparticle. used to move at relativistic velocities, will The antineutron is almost identical to the wind up at well below the speed of light—the neutron, but its magnetic field is reversed. first stage in practical containment schemes. The antiproton is a twin of the proton, but its The next step is even more remarkable: charge is negative instead of positive. Simi- than a few MeV with electric fields because The antiprotons will be "cooled." As you larly, the antielectron has a positive charge high voltages have a tendency to leak off might expect from the chaotic way they are in contrast to the electron's equal, but into the air. However, once the electrons or formed, each antiproton starts out with a negative, charge. the protons reach high speed, it is possible different speed. In the cooling ring, they will There is one important difference be- to send radio waves along the beam, if the be mixed with electrons moving in the tween the two forms of matter A particle of radio waves are properly synchronized same direction, the electrons' velocity care- normal matter is held together with quan- with their motion, charged particles can fully matched to the average speed of the tum mechanical glue. Antimatter particles gain energy from them, just as a surfboard antiprotons. The electrons, supplied by a are bound with "antiglue." does Irom water. Energies of thousands of precise electron accelerator, will move at Each glue is a solvent for the other When millions of electron volts, or giga-electron the same speed while some of the antipro- an antiparticle meets a particle of normal volts (GeV), have been attained by using tons move a little faster and some move a matter, the glues dissolve each other and this technique. Tera-electron-volt (TeV) little more slowly. The antiprotons and the machines, designed to produce beams much lighter electrons will interact through the energy of the two particles is released — in a microexplosion. The mass of both par- 1,000 times more powerful than that, are their electric charges— both negative ticles is completely converted into energy. under construction. and soon the electrons will soak up the Antimatter would be the ultimate fuel for The energy bound in a proton's mass is energy difference contained in the off- any energy need. It would be especially 0.931 GeV. Thus, any proton with an energy speed antiprotons. valuable in space, where its negligible greater than 1 GeV has more energy in its After a few minutes among the electrons, launching weight would be an enormous motion than it has in its mass. So a proton the antiprotons will be moving at the speed

moving at a number of GeV has within it of the injected electron beam, with very — their velocity. Work on the generation and control of enough energy to make another proton little randomness, or "heat," in . antimatter is taking place at Fermilab, in the or an antiproton. These cold antiprotons will then be able to United States, the Centre Europeen pour le When the scientists at CERN, Fermilab, be decelerated to even lower speeds (the Recherche Nucleaire (CERN), in Switzer- or Novosibirsk want some antiparticles lo Fermilab experiments will omit this step). land, and Novosibirsk, in the Soviet Union. play with, they take the proton beams cir- They might even be brought to a stop and Scientists in these places are using huge cling in their multikilometer accelerators, trapped in an electric or a magnetic accelerators to study these elementary boost their energy levels to several GeV, "bottle"— a chilled vacuum chamber with particles. The particle accelerators com- and dump the high-energy protons into two electrically superconducting rings built 46 OMNI —

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' ' ' " ..I :|! I'm I' J. ! N.'Y Omni — the f rsi rrcgozire cS t~e i' Robe-t Jastrow and hi. Good have .-/id / YES! Enoloseo s $18.CC for a one- hen .! mi' h 'i i n .n fieo ana the tech'-oagica* poten-iol of " "oday's yeor (\2 :ssues) subsonpl-on to OMNI interview! d Tq : e fid n n\ science. aiert to — — the myriad pos- - a sayings of S6.0C unde- what sue os Artiur C Cla'ke, Isaac Asirnav. s^bilites of the tut jre Cmn: foresees others wi I ocy or re newsstand Robert Heiniem ar,o Ray Bradbury

- o word of growing irteleotuo: vita ,Sehdi!.io: ' hy p'oohesy the phrosophtca!. emo- iiy. expending dreams and nfir ie tional, and- structure! 'ea .ties a- the hope, c world =n which he magical worldto.be Omni is the world's first has -become' real, the impossible major publication to combine sci- commonplace. ence fciion one science fact, he trst Editonally Omni pursues that which puoiica 7 ian fc affora paranormal ;s orobable within the confer of tha" phenomena the simple dgni'y of a whioh .s Known: Each imo.nth. Gmra proper ongoing s-Cientif-.c inqury presents the ;aresi developments in nna enliven sc, ence end reo'hnolagy and shves to the world we live in — to discover piedict their impact or- the future. The c : arify. and inform. Qrnni's range, miost adventurous and forward -Iook- editorially and graphically; s as broad

er . srrv- if ng rriemt of the oienh". as the universe, os nre as i me. into the wall, one near either end. currents of one thousandth of an ampere, tor would be at least twice as great. There are a number of ways to control these machines will have beam currents of Since antimatter requires much more will antimatter withoul touching it. The. mag- 10,000 amperes. 10 million times greater. energy to make than we ever get back. iuel. netic storage rings already in use can hold Such currents are commonplace in high- it will always be a very expensive moving beams ot charged antiprotons and voltage converters and high-energy lasers; However, for space propulsion, where antielectrons, but for larger amounts of an- so we know that engineers can control the every kilogram ot rocket fuel put into orbit timatter we will probably want to use other current densities. What has never been costs many hundreds of kilograms of pro- containment devices. achieved before is the combination of high pellant in the booster, antimatter's light make it the If we capture both the antiprotons and energy and high current. weight and high energy may the antielectrons formed in the tungsten When you know the power needed to run best available fuel, target, slow them down, and put them to- one of these beamed-particle weapons, Most early-science-fiction writers as- gether, they will form antihydrogen. An you realize why they will be fired in short sumed that antimatter rockets would use atom of antihydrogen consists of a single bursts. A 10-GeV machine operating at equal parts of matter and antimatter. The antiproton with an antielectron circling 10,000 amperes requires 100 terawatts two would be combined and the resulting How- around it. Antihydrogen, like hydrogen, has (TW), or 100,000 gtgawatts (GW). Hoover gamma-ray exhaust would be used.

a property called diamagnetism; it has a Dam produces only 1 GW The Saturn 5 ever, a recent study by engineers at NASA's that for tendency to avoid magnetic fields. If you rocket puts out 35 GW at takeoff. The total Jet Propulsion Laboratory revealed

than one-third that of light it put it in a magnetic bottle, the antihydrogen electric-power capacity of the United any speed less would be much more efficient to use a small . will avoid the strong magnetic fields gener- States is about 250 GW and the world larger ated by the rings and collect in the center, power output is only 1 TW We can actually amount of antimatter to heat a much water, or as a ball. In theory the antihydrogen ball build a machine (probably small enough to mass of matter— hydrogen, what- could be held there forever fit in the space shuttle's cargo bay) that will ever else is convenient. of matter Electric fields can also be used to store require the power of 100 worlds to run it. If Surprisingly, the best mix and and manipulate antimatter. The fields keep those machines could be made to operate antimatter for a given payload and velocity just a slight static charge on the antihydro- is the same for any mission. Whether you stars, the gen, allowing it to move around. A weak are going to the moon or to the beam of electrons can be used to keep a optimum ratio is four tons of water per ion of ball of antimatter charged. Alternately, the spaceship. The only thing that varies is the light pressure from an array of laser beams amount of antimatter needed to heat the

trillion onetime kilometers at better than 30 kilometers per store about "a antiprotons at will require the power of 100 with their research accelerators. However, second. For an AstroCruiser weighing one worlds to run. — the total mass of those trillion antiprotons ton. this would require 30 milligrams of of will be only one trillionth of a gram, and they It could be our key to the barely a thousandth an ounce— an- have the explosive energy of only a timatter mixed with four tons of water. will solar system.? small firecracker. Ten grams of antimatter heating 40 tons What limits the research groups is that of water could propel a 10-ton space vehi- their accelerators are designed for preci- cle to Mars in a week. A kilogram of antimat- sion, not production. In order to produce ter would send the same ship to Pluto in a protons of extremely high and exact en- month. And 100 kilograms could send a ergy, these research tools have beam cur- continuously— and there is no theoretical 10-ton payload to the nearest stars, four rents that are too low for the mass produc- reason they couldn't— they could be our light-years away, in 50 years at one-tenth tion of antimatter. key to the solar system. the speed of light. Machines that will accelerate large Research accelerators have other prob- We know how to make antimatter and we numbers ot protons to moderately high lems that limit their antimatter production. know how to store it. With a fully developed energies are receiving great emphasis to- The tungsten target, tor example, has been antimatter technology, the solar system and day. The United States, in an effort to over- given lesser priority than "more important" nearby stars could be ours. There is no come a Soviet lead, is starting to develop experiments. And the design of antimatter question about the workability of the particle-beam weapons for ballistic-missile collectors and sorters is in its infancy. The technology. It is only a matter of scale and defense. These will be compact, high- present efficiency of converting proton en- costs. The question is not whether we can

energy machines deployed in space. They ergy to antimatter is somewhere between do it. It is whether we are willing to make the will send out short bursts of high-energy one part per billion and one part per million. investment.

protons to burn up ballistic missiles as they If the conversion efficiency could be The long trip is over The autopilot beeps, rise above Earth's atmosphere. The design brought up to one part per thousand or and you tear your gaze from the retreating goals for these machines sound amazing, better, generators based on particle-beam blue marble you took off from hours before. yet each element has been accomplished weapons could produce significant When you touch the controls, laser light before. Physics and engineering are so amounts of antimatter. deep inside a zero-cold bottle teases well developed in this area that no one Where will we get the energy to run these another microgram of antihydrogen from familiar with the field doubts that such machines? We certainly wouldn't want to the frozen ball suspended in an invisible fields. weapons can be built. do it by burning fossil fuels here on Earth. cat's cradle of magnetic Pulsed Beamed-particle weapons will shoot But there is plenty ot solar energy in space. electric and magnetic fields carry the

protons with energies of 10 GeV or more- We receive from the sun 1 kilowatt of energy speck to the roaring hell of the rocket energies much lower than those already per square meter, 1 gigawatt per square chamber, where the still-frigid antimatter

achieved in many particle accelerators kilometer. A collector array 1 ,000 kilometers meets a deciliter of dirty water. They and well above the 1-GeV limit needed to on a side would provide a power input of explode in a blaze of fire, and the lunar dust make antimatter. The beam currents in 1,000 TW enough to produce grams of an- rises beneath your landing jets to hide the these machines are amazing. Whereas timatter per day. In space, the power gen- dozens of glittering casino signs towering CERN and Fermilab are content with beam erated per square kilometer of solar collec- in the distance. DO 48 OMNI DREAM HOUSE

Something in this weird house hated electricity.. It snarled angrily at all the utility companies, "Get out. GET OUT!" A true story BY RONALD DANS

It's the dead of winter. While you push your thermostat up another degree and dream about 20-cent heating oil and 30-cent gasoline. Tom Smith enjoys the radiant heat of his "energy-producing house." Seven thousand feet high on a mountainside overlooking LakeTahoe, on the California side, the house appears no more unusual than its alpine neighbors. But when the thermometer reads 12°F the winter wind shakes the snow-laden fir trees, and the sun shines for the

first time in two days, Smith still doesn't have to turn on the electric heat. When I spoke with him last January, he talked about taking out the electric baseboard heaters. "I

haven't used them since I moved in a year ago. and I don't think I'll ever need them."

When you first see the Smith house, there is no way to know that it is solar-heated. There are no exotic collectors on the roof, no complicated plumbing inside, no storage tanks down in the basement, and no walls of black-painted drums. There is none of the paraphernalia that has always been associated with solar homes, Without all these things, Smith's is the most innovative solar house in the world. The strange thing is that, although Smith has theories about the house, neither he nor top solar scientists can figure out why it works. Not only does Smith have the most innovative house in the world, but it is also the most controversial. The house employs the deceptively simple technology of radiant heat, long favored by quality builders for its high level of comfort. Heat from an open fire is radiant heat. Its soothing, penetrating quality is impossible to match with convenlional heating methods. But its cost has always been a major drawback. Most conventional radiant-heating systems use a large network of heating pipes in the ceiling and walls of the home. In Smith's house you are surrounded on four sides by radiantly heated surfaces. No matter where you are in the house, there are no cold spots or drafty corners.

The house is built around what's known as the double-shell/convective-loop concept: PHOTOGRAPHS BY DAN McCOY/RAINBOW "

i» The strange thing about the Smith house is that no solar scientist

can figure out why it works . 9

a house within a house. The south face in atl other conventional heating methods. consists mostly of double-glazed glass. While the sun is shining, excess heat is

Ten feet behind it is another wall that rises stored in the 2.100 cubic feet of dirt and almost, but not quite, to the roof. What rock backfilled underneath the house. results is a ten-toot-wide greenhouse. Air Heat is also stored in the insulated foun- in this space is heated by the sun and dation walls and the inner shell of the expands and circulates upward. There it house. At night or on cloudy days the hits the outer roof. But there is also a faise greenhouse cools faster than the north roof over the inner house, built about 12 wall, causing air to reverse its direction, inches lower. This creates a foot-thick air- picking up heat trom the earth storage. space, which the air moves through to and keeping the inner house warm. reach the north side of the house. The air When the sun is shining on a clear Jan- travels down a similar passage in the uary day. approximately 500.000 BTUs of north wall, through the crawl space un- heat will be collected by the greenhouse derneath, and back up through the slat- windows. This is the equivalent of five gal- ted greenhouse floor. The triple combina- lons of oil burned in a well-maintained tion of greenhouse in front, a false roof. furnace, enough to heat a well-insulated and talse north wall creates a massive house of the same size for a whole day at blanket of slowly moving warm air that 15°R Much of that heat is stored in the completely surrounds the living space. inner structure of the house and in the dirt This air circulates by convection alone, and rocks under the house. The entire using no fans or mechanical means. It foundation, being insulated from the out- warms the inner shell and buffers the side earth, is included in this thermal inner house from the icy winter air Be- mass. The overall mass is big enough so cause the air never circulates through the that if all the heat gathered during the day actual living space, there is no need to were put into storage, the temperature of achieve the high temperatures essential storage would rise only by 5" to 7°R This

(Preceding page) The eerie figure of Torn Smith peers out of the house that no one can explain.

(Left) the speciacuiat vie// trom the mouse's so:jir: -facing double-glazed windows, whose green- house effect warms a ten-foot-wide air pocket in front of the interior wall. /Above) a side view, "

for his family. and processes that will match the build- large capacity tor heat storage is important ing environment ing's structural longevity because the rate of heat loss out of the The Smith house has met or surpassed The only problems presented by the storage is proportional to the difference in all of these objectives. were the air plenum temperature between storage and the sur- Wood consumption, for example, is three local building code the false north wall and the rounding earth. The less heat lost from quarters of a cord a year. This is the equiva- formed by above average amount of glass. In some storage, the more heat there is available to lent of 150 gallons of fuel oil burned in an codes, potential fire routes between floors maintain warmth in the house during the average furnace, or a total annual fuel bill of some automatic means of shut- sunless periods. under $100. No air conditioning has been must have ting off the flow of fire. In Smith's house the Free energy is certainly appealing, but needed, satisfying the second objective. was classified as part of the heat- there are many institutional, economic, and Cooling is provided by the introduction of plenum ing system, exempting it from this restric- social obstacles to its widespread accep- ground-cooled air into the crawl space. In other houses that use the double- tance. The most difficult thing for any soci- This air comes from a pipe buried five feet tion. shell design, it may be necessary to install ety to accept is change, and most people below grade on the north side of the house. of in the airspace inexpensive sheet-metal view their homes as symbols of perma- If the clerestory windows at the top the dampers that can be thermostatically nence and status. Making any change in greenhouse are opened, the escaping hot using a fusible link. housing has always been strongly resisted, air creates a suction lhat draws cool air into closed, The huge amount of glass to be used in as makers of modular homes have discov- the house from the crawl space. the inflation-prone California the house was considered a problem only ered in the last 20 years. The construction Even in little trouble until heat-load calculations were submitted industry itself is tradition-bound by trade housing market there was the building inspectors. These calcula- practices, the fragmentation of effort, un- meeting the objective of cost. The Smith to extra glass actually sophisticated financial institutions, and house was built for $53,258 (that's $29.50 tions showed that the thermal performance, leaving consumer apathy. Local building codes, per square foot) by a local Tahoe contrac- helped the with much to argue about. Getting ac- which often vary from municipality to tor. This figure compares favorably nothing from local building inspectors for municipality, severely handicap innovative nationwide estimates of $32 to $36 per ceptance of house not seem to be a architects and builders. The housing in- this kind may hurdle until you attempt to build any struc- dustry is aware of such constraints and is is just the slightest bit out of the also aware of the potential for passively ture that heating heated and cooled homes. ordinary. Such details as minimum Such homes use no mechanical means temperatures are written into codes with

" " " " —

a party given by socialite Hilda "Sharp" "She's not programmed lor either, Hilda," ful gossip about friends and acquain- Corners, offers bait Deety herself as to Zebadiah answered, "but I thank you on her tances, juicy scandal about people we do if Zeb he will agree to discuss mathemat- behalf. Ladies, I got itchy about news from not like —fine! Now, do you wish to ratify, ics with her father. In the is meantime, Jake Singapore and Sumatra. So I asked my abolish, amend, or take under advise- getting himself into a roaring argument autopilot to report. Jake came along, then ment?"

"1 with Professor N. 0. Brain, a university pointed out that he had spare cold circuits ratify It unchanged. Who knows some mathematician of great pomposity and lit- here and there, just in case—and this was juicy scandal about someone we don't tle creative intellect. a just-in-case. Gay is plugged into the ga- like?"

Zeb falls instantly and hopelessly in love rage end of lhat jack, and this is a voice- "I know an item about N. 0. Brain with Deety asks to marry her, and swears switched, master-master intercom at this Doctor Neil Brain," Zebadiah offered. that the Dr. Z. father is Carter her looking for end. I can call Gay and she can call me if "Give!" is not he, his cousin, Dr. but Zebulon Ed- anything new comes in. And I increased "I got this from a reliable source, but I ward Carter. Deety, equally in love, accepts her programming by reinstating the earlier can't prove it." his proposal, whoever he is. programs, Logan and back home, for run- "Irrelevant, as long as it's juicy. Go Joined by Sharpie Corners, Professor ning retrieval _ of new data." ahead, Zebbie." Burroughs, his daughter, leave and Zeb the "Pop," I inquired, "is this covered by Rule "Well, a certain zaftig coed told this on party to find a justice of the peace. But the One? Or was Rule One abolished last night herself. She tried to give her all to Brainy in professor's car explodes as they approach in Elko?" exchange for a passing grade in the gen- it. Someone has tried to murder Professor "Eh? The chair must decide that Rule eral math course necessary for any degree

Burroughs. One is suspended until Hilda ratifies or on our campus. If is rigged to permit promi- Zeb bundles all four of them into his cancels it. Hilda my—love, years back Jane nent but stupid athletes to graduate, Miss car —a souped-up combination auto- instituted Rule One Zaftig was flunking it, which takes excep- mobile, airplane, and rocket that he calls "I ratify it!" tional talent.

Gay Deceiver. They start out for the Bur- "Thank you. But listen first. It applies to "So she arranged an appointment with roughs home in Utah, only to find that it too the department head, Brainy, and made has been destroyed by blast and fire. her quid pro quo clear He could give her Zeb lands Gay Deceiver in Nevada, horizontal tutoring then and there or in her where he and Deety are quickfy married — apartment or in his apartment or in a motel, —and so are Jake Burroughs and Hilda and she would pay for it whenever and have the In a double ceremony marked more by its •We most wherever he chose. But she had to pass." brevity than by anything else. valuable man on this "Happens on every campus, son," Pop The four of them fly to the Burroughs told him. planet to protect. hideaway north of the Grand Canyon, a "I haven't reached the point. She largely underground retreat they call Snug . . Jake, your bodyguard blabbed the story. She wasn't angry but Harbor. There they try to figure out their musters two Amazons puzzled. She says that she was unable to situation. It is obvious that someone does get her intention across to him — which

. . and one Cowardly Lion. not want the human race to have a space- seems impossible. I've seen this young, time continuum machine. Even Zeb's But we are all woman. Brainy didn't accept, didn't refuse, cousin has been murdered, they learn. wasn't offended, didn't seem to under- there is, and we'll tfy.3 They conclude that their enemies must stand. He told her that she had better talk to be aliens, creatures from another space her instructor about getting tutoring and a and time who want to keep the power of re-exam. Now Miss Zaftig is circulating the continuum travel for themselves. Jake tells story that Professor N. 0. Brain must be a the others that his calculations show there — eunuch or a robot, Not even a homo. Totally is an enormous multiplicity of universes in meals. No news broadcasts sexless." existence —the total number is six, raised "Pop," I interrupted again, "while Rule "He's undoubtedly stupid," Aunt Hilda to the sixth power, raised to the is still in limbo, and then One did Gay Deceiver have commented. "But I've never met a man I

sixth again: the biblical I power Number of any news? worry, I do!" couldn't get that point across to, if I tried. the Beast. "Null retrievals, dear Even with the amus- Even if he was uninterested in my fair vir-

Realizing that their one hope of safety ing conclusion that you and I are presumed ginal carcass. I've never tried with Profes- lies in flight among the universes, the two to have died twice, the news services do sor Brain because I'm not interested in his couples retire for the night. The following not appear to have noticed the discrep- carcass. Even barbecued," morning both women are convinced they ancy. However Miss Gay Deceiver will "Then, Hilda my darling, why did you are pregnant. Here begins Part 2 of "The inlerrupt if a bulletin comes in; Rule One is invite him to your party?" Number of the Beast. never invoked during emergencies. Zeb, "What? Because of your note, Jacob. I do you want this rig in your bedroom at don't refuse you favors,"

Deety night?" I "But, Hilda, don't understand. When I

While Hilda I Aunt and assembled lunch, "I don't want it, but I should have it. talked to you by telephone, I asked you to ourmen disappeared. They returned just in notice Prompt might save our skins." invite Zeb because I was under the im- time to sit down. Zebadiah carried an inter- "We'll leave this here and parallel another pression that he was his cousin Zebulon. unit; a wire that com Pop had he plugged into there, wilh gain stepped to wake you. And I did say that two or three others from into a jack in the wall and then hooked to Back to Rule One. No news broadcasts at the department of mathematics might the intercom. meals, no newspapers. No shoptalk, no make it a less conspicuously arranged "Gentlemen, your timing is perfect; the or financial business matters, no discus- meeting. Buf I didn't mention Doctor Brain. is all Hilda work done," Aunt greeted them. sion of ailments. No political discussions, And I did not write." "What is that?" no mention of taxes or of foreign or domes- "Jacob, I have your note. In California. On 'A guest for lunch, my dearest," Pop an- tic policy. Reading of fiction permitted en your university stationery, with your name swered. "Miss Gay Deceiver." famille, not with guests present. —Conversa- printed on ft." "Plenty for all," Aunt Hilda agreed. "I'll set tion limited to cheerful subjects Pop shook his head and looked sad, another place." She did so; Zebadiah "No scandal, no gossip?" demanded Zebadiah. said, "Sharpie — handwritten or placed the intercom on the fifth plale. Aunt Hilda, typed?" take coffee or "Does she tea?" "A matter of your judgment, dear. Cheer- "Typed. But it was signed! Wait a mo- —a m It thcr)-ci .er-s!cnai merit, let me think. has my name and of my preliminary paper. I worked on it only ter who is geometer; I've address down In the lower left. Jacob's at home, or here, and moved notes made in been written off as a bystander who got name was typed, too, but it was signed Logan to our basement here each time we himself killed.

Jake. Uh . . . 'My dear Hilda, a hasty RS. to came down." "Which doesn't bother them. These play- my phone call of yesterday. Would you be "Any notes missing here?" ful darlings would swat a fly with a sledge- so kind as to include Doctor Neil O. Brain, "I am certain this place has not been hammer or cure a cough with a guillotine. chairman of mathematics? I don't know entered. Not that the papers would matter; I They are smart, organized, efficient, and what possessed me that I forgot to mention have the material in my head. The continua vicious; and the only clue is an interest in him. Probably the pleasure ot hearing your apparatus has not been touched." six-dimensional, non-Euclidean geometry. dear voice. "Zebadiah. is Doctor Brain a Black Hat?" "We don't have a glimmer as to who

" her love, I. 'Deety sends as do Ever I asked. other than Doctor Brain, whose role is un- yours, Jacob J. Burroughs,' with Jake "I don't know, Deety. He may be a stooge clear. But. Jake, I think I know why and that signed above the typed name." in their hire. But he's part of their plot, or will lead us to who."

Zebadiah said to me, "Watson, you know they would not have risked forging a letter "Why. Zebadiah''" I demanded. my methods." to get him into Hilda's house." "Princess, your father could have worked "Certainly, my dear Holmes. A Black Hat. Aunt Hilda said. "It didn't occur to me to on endless other branches of mathemat- In Logan." question the signature on Jacob's statio- ics, and he would not have been bothered.

"We knew that. What new data?" nery under a note that sounded like his But he happened — I don't mean chance; I "Well, Pop made that call from the house; phrasing. Where do we stand now?" don't believe in chance in this sense—to

I remember it. So somebody has a tap on "Stuck in the mud. But we have added work on the one variety of the endless pos- our phone. Had, I mean: the fire probably data. At least three are involved, two Black sible number of geometries —the only one destroyed it." Hats and Doctor Brain, who may or may not that correctly describes how space-time

"A recording tap. The purpose of that fire be a Black Hat. He is, at minimum, a hired is put together. Having found it, because he may have been to destroy it and other evi- hand, an unwitting stooge, or a puppet they is a genius in both theory and practice, dence. For now we know that the Blokes in can move around like a chessman. he saw that it was a means by which to Black Hats knew that your fat her —and you, "While two plus Brainy is the minimum, it build a simple craft—amazingly simple, but it's Pop they are after —was in California is not the most probable number. This the greatest invention since the wheel— last evening. After 'killing' him in California, scheme was not whipped up overnight. It space-time craft that offers access to all they destroyed all they could in Utah. Pro- involves arson, forgery, booby-trapping a universes to the full Number of the Beast. fessor. I predict that we will learn that your car wiretapping, theft, and secret com- Plus undenumerable variations of each of office was burgled last night— of any pa- munications between points widely sepa- those many universes. pers on six-dimensional spaces." rated, with coordinated criminal actions at "We have one advantage."

Pop shrugged. "They wouldn't find each end. And it may involve doing in my "I don't see any advantage! They're much. I had postponed submitting my final cousin Zebulon. We can assume that the shooting at my Jacob!"

/ paper afterthe . . . humiliating . . . reception Black Hats know that am not the Zeb Car- "One strong advantage, Sharpie. The

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15 Linrt Inp Ifintiili Actual hitjhw.n Black Hats know that Jake has worked out proaches unity," Zebadiah agreed again. Being an oracle is a no-good profession!

this mathematics. They don't know that he "Because it can be used to travel among "Or elsewhen, Sharpie, can you kill?" has built his space-time tail Iwister; they the universes." "Kill whom, Zebbie? Or what?"

think he has just put symbols on paper "Conclusive corollary," my husband "Can you kill to protect Jake?"

They tried to discredit his work and were noted. "You bet I'd kill to protect Jacob!"

kill successful. They tried to him and barely "For this purpose, human beings fall into "I won't ask you, Princess; I know Dejah missed. They probably think Jake is dead, three groups. Those not interested in math- Thoris," Zebadiah went on. "That's the situ-

and it seems likely that they have killed Ed. ematics more complex than that needed ation, ladies. We have the most valuable But they don't know about Snug Harbor." for them to handle money, those who know man on this planet to protect. We don't

"Why do you say that. Zeb? Oh, I hope a bit about other mathematics, and a quite know from what. Jake, your bodyguard they do not! But why do you feel sure?" small third group who could understand musters two Amazons, 'one small, one "Because these blokes aren't fooling. the possibilities." medium-large, both probably knocked up.

They blew up your car and burned your flat; "Yes." and one Cowardly Lion. I'd hire the Dorsai if

whal would they do here if they knew? An "But our race does not know anything of I knew their P.O. box. Or the Gray Lensman

A-bomb?" other universes so far as I know." and all his pals. But we are all there is, and "Son, do you think that criminals can lay "They don't. Necessary assumption." we'll try. Avete, atieni. Nos morituri ros hands on atomic weapons?" "But that third group would not try to stop spemimus! Let's break out that cham- "Jake, these aren't criminals. A criminal an attempt to travel among the universes. pagne." is a member of the subset of the larger set They would wait with intellectual interest to

human beings. These creatures are not see how it turned out. They might believe or Hilda human." disbelieve or suspend judgment. But they In my old age, sucking my gums in front

"Eh? Zeb, your reasoning escapes me." would not oppose; they would be delighted of the fire and living over my misdeeds, I'll

"Deety. Run it through the computer. The if my father succeeded. The joy of intellec- remember the next few days as the hap- one between your ears." tual discovery— the mark of a true scien- piest in my life. I'd had three honeymoons

I did not answer; I just sat and thought. tist." earlier, one with each of my term-contract

After several minutes of unpleasant I sighed and added, "I see no other husbands; two had been good, one had

thoughts. I said, "Zebadiah, the Black Hats grouping. Save for a few sick people, been okay and — eventually— very lucra- don't know about the apparatus in our psychotic, these three subsets complete tive. But my honeymoon with Jacob was basement." the set, Our opponents are not psychotic; heavenly. "Conclusive assumption," my husband Ihey are intelligent, crafty, and organized." The whiff of danger sharpened the joy agreed, "because we are still alive." 'As we all know too well," Zebadiah Jacob seemed unworried. and Zebbie has "They are determined to destroy a new echoed. hunches, like a horseplayer. Seeing that

work in mathematics and to kill the brain "Therefore our opponents are not human Zebbie was relaxed, Deety got over being

that produced it." beings. They are alien intelligences' from jumpy; and I never was, as I hope to end is "That a probability that truly ap- elsewhere." I sighed again and shut up. like a firecracker, not linger on, ugly help-

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Sleek. Sexy. Aerodynamic. Capri for 1980 features full instrumentation. That's Capri RS for 1980. It's hard to believe Halogen headlamps. And a hatchback that a car this exciting also has such good with fold-down rear seat. It's a little touch of Europe ina lot of American car.

MERCURY . " 3 "

in-law has done things to this mass of '"Zeb, I'm so smart I scare myself. "Then less, useless . . computer should why did you turn me down for that raise?' A spice of danger adds zest to life. Even spaghetti that no decent compliments! Take your during a honeymoon—especially during a put up with! It's a bastard hybrid." 'Never mind the

hand off knee! "Not so loud, dear. I don't honeymoon. "You shouldn'l call Gay it, Deety. And my An odd honeymoon. We worked hard, she's not a bastard." want my boyfriend to hear,' there are more. There are at least but our husbands seemed never too busy "She can't hear us; I've got her ears un- 'And piece that is monitor- four to any of Zebadiah's code ior pat-fanny squeeze-titty, and unhurried hooked, except that answers uses just one list, but the au- kisses. Not a group marriage but two two- ing news-retrieval programs and that goes phrases. He answers seveFal ways for each of his somes that were one family, comfortable through this wire to that jack in the wall; she topilot talk with Zebadiah only in the base- phrases; and all any of them mean is either one with the other. I dropped most of my can own sparky-bitch ways, and Zebbie some- ment now. Oh, I'm sure she was a nice girl 'Roger' or 'Null program; rephrase.' idea. Fun," times called me Hilda rather than Sharpie. until that big ape of mine raped her. Aunt "I like the

I I myself. I animize a computer; We settled into a routine: Up early every Hilda, don't worry about hurting Gay's feel- "Well, do of it a person. And this semi random day; our men worked on instruments and ings; she hasn't any. This is an idiot as think as Deceiver seem wires and things and installing the time- computers go. Any one-horse college and answer list makes Gay time more alive when she isn't. Not even space widget into Gay Deceiver's gizzard most high schools own or share in much computers much more complex. This one versatile, compared with a ground-based while Deety and I gave the housework a autopilot plus computer. But"— Deety gave a quick lick and a promise. Our mountain home is primarily cybernetic, an digital capacity and limited storage. sm ije— "I'm going to hand my husband needed little attention —more ot Jacob's limited the Zebadiah has tacked on some surprises." genius. Then Deety and I got busy on a But mods technical matter for which Deety could do make it more than an autopilot but not a "How, Deety?" "You know how he says, 'Good morning, with some help from me. general-purpose computer. A misbegotten you?' when we sit down for I'm not much good for technical work, hybrid. It has far more random-number op- Gay. How are

it it has extra func- breakfast." biology being the only thing I studied in tions than needs, and usually an- "Yes, I like it. Friendly. She I never finished my degree. depth. And " This was amplified by almost six thousand swers, Tm fine, Zeb.' test code. It orders the au- hours as a volunteer nurse's aid in our "Yes. It's a topilot to run a self-check throughout and to campus medical center, and I took courses instruction, which takes that make me an uncertified nurse or medi- report any running ilfre uniformed less millisecond. If Zebadiah didn't cal tech or even jackleg paramedic. I don't than a or an equivalent answer, he would shriek at the sight ol blood and can clean character sighed. "I got get that out what up vomit without a qualm and would not rush straight here to find was no time to listen wrong. But I'm going to add another an- hesitate to fill in as a scrub nurse. Being a campus widow with too much money is fun to smart talk." He rested swer. Or more." I've paid "I thought you refused to modify any- but not soul-filling. I like to feel that his hand on the rent on the piece of earth I'm using. thing." ot ev- butt of his gun. . . . "I'm 'Aunt Hillbilly, this is software, not hard- Besides that, I have a smattering authorized and directed to > erything because of my addiction to the going to search ware. I'm the to include all of us, by printed page, plus attending campus lec- amplify answers this site and the cabin That is pro- tures that sound intriguing, then sometimes name, for each of our voices. gramming, elementary. You say good morn- auditing a related course. I audited de- this gadget, and it will— when I'm scriptive astronomy, took the final as if for ing to finished—answer you and call you either credit, and got an A, I had even figured a Burroughs." cometary orbit correctly, to my surprise Hilda or Mrs. her call Hilda." (and the professor's). tions that IBM never dreamed of." "Oh, let me doorbell or out a "Deety, why are you taking off the cover 'All right, but let her call you Mrs. Bur- I can wire a clean roughs then, for variety." stopped-up soil pipe with a plumber's plates? I thought you were strictly a pro- now and Software. mechanic." "Well, all right. Keep her a personality." snake, but if it's really technical, I hire spe- grammer. Not a call you— low I "I have her cialists. "I am strictly a software mathematician. could even So Hilda can help but usually can't do the wouldn't attempt to modify this monster weighting! —Nanny Goat."

do. I I "Do, Deety, please But job alone. Gay Deceiver had to be repro- even on written orders from my lovable but guffawed, Jacob's face." grammed, and Deety, who does not look sneaky husband. But how in the name of want to be around to see "You will be; it won't be programmed to like a genius, is one. Jacob's daughter Allah can a software hack think about to any voice but yours, Just should be a genius, and her mother had an simplification analysis for a program if she answer that way half of don't say, morning, Gay' unless Pop l,Q. that startled even me, her closest doesn't know the circuitry? The first 'Good is here's one for my husband; it helping poor, this shows what this autopilot was listening. But friend. I ran across while book grief-stricken Jacob decide what to save, manufactured to do, and the second half, Zebadiah says, 'Good morning, Gay. How pictures, shows the follies are you?' and the speaker answers, 'I'm what to burn. I burned unflattering the Xeroxed pages, your useless papers, and clothes. A dead per- Zebadiah has seduced her into. This fine, Zeb. But your fly is unzipped, and over son's clothes should be given away or bleedin' bundle of chips now speaks three eyes are bloodshot. Are you hung " burned; nothing should be kept that does logic languages, interfaced, when it was again?' playful. it won't any Deety is so solemn and yet so not inspire happy memories. I cried a bit, built to use only one. But accept

with it, dear! Poor Zebbie, who drinks the and that saved Jacob and Deety from hav- of them until it has been wheedled "Do of of us. But he might not be ing to cry later. Zebadiah's double-talk. Even then It rarely least any The next two days were easy for me, hard answers a code phrase with the same an- wearing anything zippered." at in row. What does it say in "Zebadiah always wears something for Deety. I held lights and made notes on a swer twice a zip- clipboard while she studied Gay's anatomy answer to 'You're a smart girl, Gay'?" meals. Even his underwear shorts are all dislikes elastic." and frowned and got smudged and sweaty "I remember. 'Boss, 1 bet you fell that to pered. He getting hersejf.into impossible positions. the girls. Over.' "But he'll recognize your voice, Deety."

it voice, And once she cursed in a fashion that "Sometimes. Most often, as that answer "Nope. Because will be your would have .caused Jane to scold. She is weighted to come up three times as often modified." the added, "Aunt Nanny Goat, your stepson- as any of the others. But listen to this. And it was. I'm contralto, about range 62 OMNI -

of [he actress— or girl friend—who origi-

nally recorded Gay Deceiver's voice. I don't think my voice has her sultry, bedroom quality, but I'm a natural mimic. Deety bor- rowed a wigglescops— oscilloscope?

from her father my Jacob, and I practiced until my patterns for Gay Deceiver's origi- nal repertoire matched hers well enough. Deety said she could not tell them apart without close checking.

I got info the spirit of it. such as having Deefy cause Gay Deceiver to say occa- sionally to my husband, "Fine, except for my backache, you wicked old billy goat!" And Jacob tripped that reply one morning

when I did have a backache, and I teel sure he had one. too. We didn't put in answers ihat Deety felt might be too bawdy for Jacob's "innocent" mind — 1 didn't even hint at how her father actually talked to me in private. Let us all

preserve our illusions; it lubricates social relations. Possibly Deety and Zebbie talked the same way to each other in pri- vate and regarded us "old folks" as hopelessly square.

Deety

Aunt Hilda and I finished reprogramming

in the time it took Zebadiah and Pop to design and make ihe fail-safes and other mods needed to turn Gay Deceiver, with the time-space widget installed, into a con- tinua traveler— which included placing the backseats twenty centimeters farther back (for leg room) after they had been pulled out to place the widget abaft the bulkhead and weld it to the shell. The processing controls and triple verniers were remoted to the driver's instrument board, with one voice control for the widget, all others man- ual.

If any of our voices said, "Gay Deceiver, take us home!" car and passengers would Wild Turkey Lore: instantly return to Snug Harbor.

I don't know why but I trust my pop. He brought us home safe twice, doing it with The keenness of sight of the no fail-safes and no deadman switch. The latter paralleled the "Take us home!" voice Wild Turkey is legendary order, was normally clamped closed and covered, but could be uncovered and held among woodsmen. Because in a fist, closed. There were other iail-saies of the position of its eyes,the for temperature, pressure, air, radar colli- sion course, and other dangers. If we bird can detect the slightest wound up inside a star or a planet, none of this could save us, but it is easy to prove motion in a circumference that the chances of falling downstairs and breaking your neck are enormously higher of 300 degrees. than the chance of co-occupying space with other matter in our native universe- It seems fitting that space is plentiful, mass is scarce. We hoped that this would be true of other uni- the name of America's verses as well. No way ahead of time to check on the greatest native bird is also Number-of-the-Beast spaces, but "The the of America's cowards never started, and the weaklings name died on the way." None of us ever men- greatest native whiskey- tioned not trying to travel the universes. Besides, our home planet had turned un- Wild Turkey Bourbon. friendly. We didn't discuss Black Hats, but we all knew that they were still here and that we remained alive by lying doggo and lei- WILD TUKKEY'/lOl PROOF —

John ting the world think we were dead. "They're Deety's —belonged to Jane's Dejah Thoris seems prone to, since

We ate breakfast better each morning Grandfather Rodgers. I have a dress Carter made her his. watched, then im- after hearing Gay Deceiver offer "null re- saber. Belonged to my dad, who gave it to Pop and Aunt Hilda blues, itated, including (I sawl) lears in Hilda's port" on news retrievals. Zebadiah. I am me when the army took me. Dress on Pop's saber, fairly certain, had given up his cousin for too. I took them with me, never had occa- eyes after she buckled have sion to wear either." Pop got up and went when he knelt and kissed her hand. dead. I feel sure Zebadiah would its balance, gone to Sumatra to follow a lost hope, were into his— their—bedroom, calling back, Zebadiah drew sword, tried saber." sighted along its blade. "Handmade and it not that fie had acquired a wife and a "I'll show you the to "Deety, would balanced close to the hilt. Deety, your prospective child. I had missed my next My husband said me, period; so had Hilda. Our men toasted our you mind my handling your sword?" great-grandfather paid a pretty penny for that is this. It's an honest weapon." not-yet-bulging bellies; Hilda and I smugly "My Captain, sword yours."

it cost. It resolved to be good girls, yes. sir!—and "Heavens, dear, I can't accept an heir- "I don't think he knew what was careful. Hilda joined my morning toning up, loom." presented to him."

I feel certain." and the men joined us the first time they "If my Warlord will not permit his princess "For good reason.

it stood back, went into hanging caught us ai it. to gilt him with a sword, he can leave Zebadiah fast moulinets vertically, left Zebadiah did not need it but seemed !o where it is! I've been wanting to give you a guard, made

did not realize that I right, then horizontally, clockwise and enjoy it. Pop brought his waistline down live wedding present and and centimeters in one week. had the perfect gift for Captain John Car- counterclockwise. He then suddenly "Shortly after that toast, Zebadiah ter." dropped inlo swordsman's guard, lunged, fast as a striking cat. pressure-tested Gay Deceiver's shell "My apologies, Dejah Thoris. I accept and recovered, notice?" I four atmospheres inside her and a pres- and will keep it bright. I will defend my said softly to Pop, "Did you quietly, "Knows saber. sure gauge sticking out through a fitting in Princess with it againsf all enemies." Pop answered her shell. "Helium is proud to accept. If you make a Sword, too." never cradle of your hands, I can stand in them Hilda said loudly, "Zebbie! You

Zebadiah. sprawled out, looked up over and bring it down." told me you went to Heidelberg." the the fireplace. "Pop, you were in the navy?" Zebadiah grasped me. a hand above "You never asked, Sharpie. Around of the I three they called the Scourge "No, army— if you count 'chairborne in- each knee, and was suddenly me- Red Ox me

fantry.' They handed me a commission for ters tall. Sword and belt were on hooks; I Neckar." " scars 7 having a doctorate in mathematics, told me lifted them down and was myself placed "What happened to your

while I "Never got any, dear, I hung around an they needed me for ballistics. Then I spent down. My husband stood straight hoping for one. But no one got my whole tour as a personnel officer, sign- buckled it around him. Then he dropped to extra year, ing papers." one knee and kissed my hand. through my guard, ever. Hate to think about

"Standard operating procedure. That's a My husband is mad north-northwest, but how many German faces I carved into

navy sword and belt up there. Thought they his madness suits me. I got fears in my checkerboards." might be yours." eyes, which Deety doesn't do much but Zeb Before heading for the pool, our wives argued over how Barsoomian warriors dress —a debate complicated by the fact fairly sober. that I was the only one IRVINfe. O Jake and I agreed to wear sidearms. Our princesses had buckled them on; we FULLER [/) would wear them. But Deety wanted me to

take off the grease-stained shorts I had VOCXOfZ 0F worn while working. "Captain John Carter never wears clothes. He arrived on Bar- soom naked and from then on never wore MBVlOOZlTy anything but the leather and weapons of a fighting man. Jeweled leather for state oc- 6D casions, plain leather for fighting, and sleeping silks at night. Barsoomians don't wear clothes. When John Carter first laid eyes on Dejah Thoris," Deety closed her eyes and recited: " 'She was as destitute of clothes as the Green Martians.... Save for her highly wrought ornaments she was en-

tirely naked.' " Deety opened her eyes, stared solemnly. "The women never wear clothes, just jewelry." Jake wrapped his sarong into a

breechclout, strapped it in place with his

saber belt. I replaced those grimy shorts with swim briefs, which, Deety conceded,

were "almost Barsoomian." I was no longer dependent on Jake's clothes; my travel kit,

always in my car, once I got at it, supplied necessities from passport to poncho. Sharpie wore pearls and rings she had been wearing at her party, plus a scarf ^Mfavi around her waist to which she attached all the costume jewelry Deety could dig up. Deety carried Hilda's mink cape, then CONIINIK--DONPAGE-I12 MANFRED KAGE

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They had a nearly perfect world, where babies were the best possible reward BYJAYGECARR

I. 3 came while Janica was light-sculpting, wilh Sylvie hovering ner- vously about the perimeter and trying to make her- self useful. That was typical of both of them; Janica, at that point in her life, anyway, lived her art, while Sylvie's reason for transferring to Pavlova Village was to sit at the feet — often literally -of one of the acknowl- edged virtuosos of the newest and most demanding multidiscipline. So, characteristically. Janica stood cool and ele- gant in her chartreuse paint-dye and projectors, while Sylvie jittered, checking all the last-minute details - were the projectors perfectly in synch, per- fectly centered on wrist and forehead and ankle, perfectly aligned? -over and over. (Most light- sculptors were content with three or at most four projectors, wrists and forehead, say. or, more dif- ficult, wrists and ankles. But Janica was never con- tent wilh fewer than five, and sometimes, with a con- temptuous casualness that literally awed her young acolyte, she added a sixth at the waist.)

But once the music started, it was Sylvie who stood, unmoving. scarcely breathing, while Janica's sinuous body swayed in delicate interpretation of the plaintive melody that filled the studio. "Greensleeves." sang a poignant young girl's ." voice, "is my defight . . And Janica danced, a sad, slow weaving of loss and loneliness; as she moved, the projectors left their trails of living light, ribbons of color, thick and dark tor slow, deliberate movements and thin and light for the quick leaps and pirouettes, This one. Sylvie thought, this one is going The strident brr-rrring of a wrist-corn shrilled through the soft singing, and Janica jerked, destroy- ing the smoothness of the furls of solidifying light.

"I thought you knew enough to set your com on hold." Janica snarled, snapping off the projectors and plowing through the still-fluid curls, ruining the earlier perfect part of the sculpture.

PAINTING BY WOLFGANG HUTTER darkness, at ..." being rushed immediately to a hosp. As M-day began, in the "But I did-l-l-1 exposed to some mys- least half of the villagers were crowded "You didn't, obviously." A scorntul flip of The entire village around the single functioning transmatter her still-project ored arm behind her. "Wipe terious neovirai disease (nonfatal and only Sylvie, The sees made the people keep a wide that; it's ruined. And answer your boring eventually curable, of course!); in her opening around the machine. corn." through some strange mutant quirk midnight the transmatter leeth- physiology, both immune and a noncarrier At precisely It was still ringing — an imperious, glowed, and shapes solidified. At first the jarring shrillness. they only dreams. curious watchers saw only a team of "But it's not my com, Janica, see?" She Even Sylvie knew were to white-clad medics; but as they moved, held out her wrist. The blinking red light that Nothing bad or sad would ever happen glimpses of a sealed carrier, floating at should have accompanied any demand for Janica, proud darling of the powers that be; about chest height, were caught. attention wasn't on, or to Phil, either. But who ever noticed Phil. The chief medic identified himself to the Janica's silver-rimmed eyes widened just when Janica, sleek and elegant, was in Phil's first. security chief. Although both teams slightly. Then she moved, still with that view? Besides, this was Sylvie whispered to worked in shifts, they had undoubtedly met feline, sinuous grace, to the shelf where her "But isn't it exciting!" other on numberless similar mid- personal items were neatly placed. But the her newtermhus, Ray. each older and far more experienced, nights. Still, you didn't get to be a security red light wasn't blinking; it stared at them, a Ray the nolo chief by being careless. All the medics continuous crimson leer. yawned and switched channels on were checked out— the checks carefully "Override." Sylvie was puzzled. that displayed over their double bed. designed not to break the integrity of the "Official override," Janica retorted and "Yeah, sure, but it's not as if we were cho- chief her- watch it on the sealed suits— and the security smiled slowly, and her thumb pushed down. sen, hon. You'd do better to self ran through the checks on the chief "Citizen Janica Petain-Suharto," said the holo; you'll see more." pooh, stodgy old thing," she medic. life-size, vaguely familiar holo-image that "Oh, the checks were completed, the your officially com- pouted. "Janica is my friend. I'm sure she'll Once appeared, "as ." ." chief medic took over, Leaving guards at invite me to— well . . pute'lected representative . . sealed "Yuck," he rejected all the choices and the transmatter, which would be The news was all over the village in min- the cortege turned to- of stopped the discussion by reaching for his until M-day ended, utes, and it was the main topic conversa- ward Phil and Janica's cottage, which was tion for weeks— except among those few termwife. generously sized, Tudor-beamed, and individuals who were, or pretended to be, One hour before M-day they officially synt hi -thatch- roofed, but dwarfed by the indifferent. Janica herself was completely closed off all the transmatters in the re- village except for one. (There were no long glasshouse studio behind it. blase\ It was, as she occasionally — Phil stood proudly at the front of the mob. minded her neighbors, her second time. fences around the village, but with the making another As soon as the medic was certified, he Sylvie was positively g reen with envy. Her ubiquitous transmatters knew— or stepped forward. "I'm the—" mind kept producing harmless scenarios. continent a step away, who nearest village was physi- "Get back," a security guard snarled, Janica miscalculating one of her unnatu- cared— if the Phil out, or a hundred?) just as if he hadn't helped check rally high leaps, breaking her leg, and cally a kilometer away— along with the rest of the watchers, not half an hour before. Phil stopped, puzzled, his feelings hurt. "But I'm the—" he began again, nervously backing off the grassy path and into the

night-blooming mooncreams that lined it, crushing some of the fragile flowerets, One of the medics spoke to the crowd. "Stand out of our way, please. We've a tight schedule to maintain." They pushed past him, and Phil stood staring after them, good-natured face blank, mouth hanging

slightly open. It wasn't until one of his neighbors nudged him and said, "Better get along, Phil," that he came out of his daze and trotted along after the parade heading loward his cottage.

{It was a parade that diminished rapidly, as more and more of its components de- cided they could see more on their holos than by trying to crane over thei r neighbors' heads.) M-day plus twenty minutes. The security chief raised her hand to ac- tivate the cottage's announcer, but Janica

opened her door, making it obvious that she had been watching the whole thing on her holo. The chief checked Janica's I.D. and compared her retina prints and pore pat- terns with the I.D. and— just to be sure— with central records. "Who else is present?" she asked Janica. "No one at the moment," Janica frowned. invite "But I do hope I'll be allowed to some ." of my very special friends later . . "Naturally" the secoff nodded. "Within limits, as you've been told. And of course, if " " "

they're already here, within the village. We sealed your village as soon as— "My termhus, Phil," Janica gestured casually to indicate the red-faced man el- bowing his way through the crowd, which was being kept well from door. "I back her To never knew his outrage, he was checked out again, before being allowed into his very own col- lage, Then the secoff nodded and ges- tured the medics with their carrier inside gold firmly shut door. rum and the (Only three of the medics actually went

inside; the others either waited patiently in the grassy open space, the targets of numerous staring eyes, or moved off to tasted other duties. Many of the watchers left, too. Staring at a closed door seemed rather

, futile, especially when the holos would be showing the scene inside, live.) Inside, the secoff was performing intro- like this'.' ductions. 'Citizen Janica Petain-Suharto, Citizen Phil Jones-Vishinsky, may I present Citizen Medic Herve Ling-Hart and his staff," She glanced at her wrist, her throat worked, and asubvocal message went out.

(The team has your shelter set up, Herve. if the second and third shifts want to go and relax.) "Congratulations to the both of you," the medic beamed, stepping forward and shaking hands vigorously. "If you'd care to ,"

see credentials , my . "No, no. Doc," Phil grinned heartily. "Good enough for the lieut here, good

' 1 enough for this citizen, right, Lieut? "You'll want to know the day's schedule, of course," the doctor nodded. "Schedule?" Phil was puzzled. He - flopped downward, and an extrude slid out «-?3" from the wall and caught him in a sitting

position with neat precision, "I thought we — had our choice. I thought "Yes and no," the doctor frowned. His own throat worked silently, (Weren't these citizens briefed. Shirza?) In his ears, a tiny raspberry of disgust echoed. "Yes, there is a schedule, and I'm afraid we must insist it be adhered to, However, there is a certain amount of flexibility; within that and con- sidering the subject's physical — " limitations If you're still drinking It's because you haven't "Limitations?" Phil interrupted, "I thought nothing but perfect was allowed," a blended whiskey tasted gold rum "Oh, Phil," Janica was disgusted. "Have on the rocks... on the rocks. you forgotten? They're smaller." "Oh," Phil's face cleared. "If you weren't so boringly handsome," That's the reaction that's made Make sure the rum is Puerto she muttered. Puerto Rican Gold Rum one of die Rican. The people of Puerto Rico "The schedule," the medic hid his dis- Listen trrowinj liquors in America have been making rum for almost gust better than Janica, "begins with today. It's the smooth alternative to five centuries. specialized awakening at aught six hundred precisely. Their Medichecks will take approximately ten bourbons, blends, Canadians- ski'U and dedication result in arum minutes. Afterward, you two, and as many even Scotch. of exceptional taste and purity. as four of your friends, can have breakfast Try our Gold Rum with soda, No wonder over 85% of the rum with the subject—" ginger ale, or on the rocks. The sold in this country comes "Yeah, we know," Phil was nodding. He first sip will loved to hand out favors. "You should see amaze you. The second from Puerto Rico. what me an' Janny— " (Janica winced; she will convert you. " PUERTO RUfflS had told him and told him) — have Rl

Cambridge University's

first Ph.D. in parapsychology just may have proved the existence of ESP, but his fraud-proof research hasn't quieted committed skeptics inJTERV/IELTU

Carl Sargent not only is the first man ever to be granted a external sights and sounds, and inner visions come to the fore. In a doctorate in parapsychology by England's prestigious typical ESP test, a person "in Ganzfeld" describes his thoughts Cambridge University. He is also the first to receive such while a distant sender tries to project an image into his mind. After an honor from any of England's traditionally conservative academic about 35 minutes, the experimenter shows the subject four pic-

shrines. It looks as if Dr. Sargent's recognition is well earned. His tures. One is the target. The subject then ranks the pictures ac- experiments are causing a stir in British scientific circles because cording to how well they match his Ganzfeld thoughts. Guessing they seem to solve two problems that have long bedeviled psi the target gives only one chance in tour of a correct answer. studies: Psychic phenomena often seem loo weak to be interest- In their first experiments, Sargent, Trevor Har ley, and other Cam-

ing, and when an experiment does give significant results, it often bridge colleagues tested 26 people, who took personality tests proves impossible to repeat them. Sargent's iests seem to show before the experiment. After the Ganzfeld trial, but before they saw

that ESP is like a weak sense, hard to pin down because it is any of the pictures, the subjects filled in a questionnaire about their normally suffocated by the enormous flow of sound, light, and experiences. Eight, or 31 percent, then said the target picture fitted

other information reaching the brain. their visions. It was better than chance, but not significantly so. He's Been testing what is known as the Ganzfeld technique. He Sargent was encouraged, however. He reasoned that if uses "white noise" to blank out the subject's hearing and places Ganzfeld works by reducing our sensory signals to habits thai can half ping-pong balls over their eyes to eliminate visual distractions. be ignored — a process that takes 20 minutes or so— ESP scores Under these conditions, the brain simply stops paying attention to should improve with time. That was exactly what he found. Scores at the start were appallingly bad. then improved, and ended high. In a field as controversial as parapsychology, test methods must Two more series gave 45-percent correct answers. A fourth gave be tight enough to eliminate any chance of fraud or ot misinterpret- 44-percent, and all subjects scored better than chance. In all ing results. Few are— which is why it is so significant that Sargent's tests, ESP performance seemed to be related to two personality repeated experiments passed the strict Cambridge examiners. In variables. Extroverts did better than introverts, and people who their conversation Dr. Christopher Evans — one of Omni's contribut- said on the questionnaire that Ganzfeld had changed their con- ing editors and a well-known British skeptic —probed the impor- sciousness did better than those who were relatively unaffected. tance of Sargent's work for parapsychology

Omni: Oxford and Cambridge have a tra- hypnosis, and so on — and they might be immediate practcal applications. Is that

dition of rejecting doctoral Iheses about very difficult to "get on tap," as you put it, true? Can you think of other applications of

ESP. Getting your doctorate in this elusive and to use in everyday life. The weak ef- ESP if it could be demonstrated to be true? area seems to represent a significant mile- fects are all you can get in the waking state, Sargent: Yes, but there's a special prob- stone for parapsychology. and may be the "important" ones from the lem here. Suppose you wanted, say, to

Sargent: When I proposed this topic, I point of view of practicability. transmit telepathically the contents of a let-

didn't encounter any significant opposition. Omni: It seems as if you have tied down ter, a file, or something. Like it or not, you'll

Quite the reverse. It's really a question oi some critical variables in parapsychology. have noise within the ESP channel because

how you do the research. If it's properly Unfortunately, this is reminiscent of other ofwhat is going on in the mind of the viewer,

' conducted, if the methods are correct, then "breakthroughs" of this kind in the past. For and this might limit transmission or recep-

I don't see that there can be any objections example, in the 1940s Gertrude Schmeid- tion. Also, most successful experiments so to a Ph.D. in any subject whatsoever, let ler showed that people who believed in far have used inherently "interesting" alone parapsychology. Now, as for making ESP— she called them sheep — were more stimuli, such as pictorial targets, art prints,

a novel contribution to science, which is likely to score above chance, while those cartoons, and so on, If you tried to transmit

what a Ph.D. is supposed to be about, who disbelieved— the goats— were likely binary code, it would be a damn sight less

parapsychology is an extremely easy field, to score below chance. These sheep/goat interesting and might not work.

because it's one in which relatively little of studies were never duplicated, were they? Omni: I would have thought that the the groundwork has been mapped out. Sargent: There are many reasons for this. transmission of pictures by ESP would be Omni: What did you actually set out to do The first thing is that the Schmeidler exper- very useful. To take the most extreme case, in your thesis? iment used enormous numbers of subjects the CIA might train people to work in Ganz- information Sargent: I wanted to research the indi- and yet the magnitude of the effect was feld and pump back to base vidual-difference variable —what makes very small. Many people who reported that without having to use a radio transmitter. one person apparently capable of ESP and they had failed to replicate the experiment Sargent: I'm very skeptical about this. big are psychologi- another not — and I started by looking at simply didn't have a data base enough Consider what you doing

personality factors. It's long been main- to get the effect. The second point is that in cally. To obtain successful ESP, it seems tained that certain types of personality are many of the repeat studies people used that you have to promote a high degree of

particularly favorable to success in these different ways of assessing the sheep/goat openness and receptivity, If you started of playing with tasks. In a couple of experiments I did in- variable. Simple things, like the wording around espionage, where deed find an anxiety factor coming into questionnaires, can substantially change you're dealing with a person in a yery vul- play. Experimenters who had very low anxi- the variable that you are measuring. nerable state and surrounded by hostility

ety scores on a standard test got very vari- So, given all these factors, one wouldn't and paranoia, then I suspect that the whole able results from their subjects. Some of have expected very high replicability In system is just going to clam up. In fact there the subjects would score very high and fact, the replicability isn't as bad as you is experimental evidence for this. some very low. However, experimenters make out. It's about 35 percent, which A more promising field might be precog- with high anxiety had subjects who clus- means that a bit over a third of the experi- nition. To give a rather way-out example, tered very closely around chance. menters who repeated the experiment one might use a reliable precognitive tech- Now it's been said that the experi- found a significant difference favoring the nique to predict natural disasters. Just menter's task in parapsychology is to liber- sheep. That is quite good for what is admit- think how useful parapsychologisis would

ate the subject's innate capacity, and one ted to be a weak effect. be in California if they could get information

could argue that that's what the low-anxiety Omni: By "weak effect," you mean one that about when it is going to slide into the sea! experimenters were doing. But that wasn't doesn't appear to be particularly useful to Perhaps that's a bit speculative. Let me

really satisfactory because I wasn't finding anyone. What is there in parapsychology give a different example. I have often seen anything that differentiated between exper- that you would describe as a strong effect? in our own Ganzfeld work that people who imenters who got results and those who Sargent: An excellent example is the work together regularly as a sender/re-

didn't. Later I had the opportunity to look at Ganzfeld work. It's one of a range of ceiver pair soon begin to strike up a quite the work of another parapsychologist, techniques - hypnosis, meditation, pro- remarkable rapport. I've observed time Adrian Parker, from Edinburgh. He had gressive relaxation, dream states— that and time again that after repeatedly work-

made certain predictions that I proceeded have at least two things in common. These ing together, they achieve episodes of a to test, of which the most important was that two things are clearly very important in in- special kind of mental receptivity between successful Ganzfeld experimenters should ducing ESP. One is the reduction of distrac- each other. This overflows into their daily be more extroverted than those who tion by such external factors as visual and life to produce an unusual degree of open-

weren't. And that's exactly how it turned auditory stimuli. The other is that the sub- ness between them. I can't help seeing an out. What was also interesting was that, as ject's attention is forced onto internal pro- important psychotherapeutic aspect here,

a group, the people who were not getting cesses. It seems that the mind becomes coming from the fact that you are working results were phenomenally introverted. increasingly preoccupied with things that with an altered state of consciousness that Omni: From this kind of study, you should are going on inside rather than outside the simply opens people up to new communi- be able to establish which are the strong head. So distraction and internalization are cation possibilities. ESP-promoting factors, and from then on two key effects in producing ESP and are Omni: But surely we've got to the point you should be able to get ESP on tap. themselves readily induced by the Ganz- where either something is beginning to

in it If it Sargent: Well r -it may not be as easy as feld. The repeatability rate of Ganzfeld happen parapsychology or isn't. that. It's plain that the procedures that yield studies is higher than anything else in is — and like lots of scientists, I'd be abso-

the big effects are the ones that involve parapsychology— almost 60 percent. lutely thrilled if that were the case — then

altered states of consciousness— sleep, Omni: It sounds as if Ganzfeld might have should we expect some real practical ap- CONT NUHOON PAGE 106 82 OMNI .

ILLEGAL

.'.".-.^* : ;'i '"' ALIENS !// Visitors from space ose legal entanglemer

r" ROBERT A. FREITAS,JR

#A« light flashes in the

night sky i tors scramble northward from — .... Base. The glowing spot

orange-red. Sirei while powerful s *WR8* r

A side panel ui out a blinding light from within. A hi figure appears in shadowy silt cylindrical object in one :es in friendly greeting. Suddenly the sharp crack of a rifle

pierces the air. Several onlookers scream in unison as a fountain of green, foamy liqu.'"' spurts from the visitor's head. The creatui * ( 1

in :-day American law ; all living entities into three strictly

This distinction is of critical importance. —

ford legal rights and responsibilities only io describing the corpus delicti for this of- "person" stalus in our system of justice is a persons. Nonpersons — animals, plants, fense always include two parts; (1) the kill- political question, a matter of basic public and nonliving entities, such as cars and ing of a human being (2) by a human being. policy. Society must decide to whom it computers— have no rights and are re- Since criminal laws are always strictly con- wishes to grant legal rights and duties. Cer- garded as mere property. Property may not strued by the courts, the corpus delicti for tainly any sentient being who demon- bring legal action on its own behalf, al- homicide cannot be met under current law strates the humanlike characteristics of ra- though its human owner may do so to re- in any case involving extraterrestrial be- tionality, possession of technology or a cover any losses of property. ings. If a man kills an alien visitor, he is not symbolic language, -a sense of time, ma- The extraterrestrial (ET) in the opening guilty of murder, since no "human being" nipulative appendages, emotions, self- scene was not a member of the species has died. Shockingly enough, the converse awareness or consciousness, or the ability Homo sapiens and was therefore nonhu- situation, in which a human is slain by an to make moral choices should be consid- man by definition. However, it appears to ET, yields the same result: There is no mur- ered worthy of personhood in our society. have been alive and capable of voluntary der, since the man died at the hands of a Assuming we elect to treat extraterrestri- motion; hence, it cannot have been a plant. nonhuman. al beings as legal persons, what kind of Thus the creature was legally, by rebuttable Similar difficulties will arise in rape persons will they be considered? presumption, an animal. cases. The usual common-law definition of One possibility is that ETs might be af- Technically, the ET should be classified the offense goes like this: "The unlawful forded refugee status. Refugees are, tech- as fera naturae ("a wild animal") because carnal knowledge of a woman by a man nically, stateless persons, neither citizens no proof Of tameness or ownership was forcibly and against her will." But woman is nor nationals of any country on Earth. A evident. Wild animals running loose on pri- strictly defined as a female member of the common definition of this status is: "any vate property may be hunted and killed by, human species, and man as a male Homo person uprooted from his home who has or captured and reduced to being the per- sapiens. Even assuming he/she/it/they crossed a frontier— natural or artificial sonal possession of, any human being have the necessary physiological equip- and who looks for protection and suste- armed with buckshot and a little courage. ment, no extraterrestrial being legally can nance from a government other than his On federal lands such creatures are under former one." Space creatures stranded the jurisdiction of the Fish and Wildlife Ser- here, out in the galactic boondocks near vice of the Department of the Interior on Sol, seem to fit this description rather well. state lands they are subject to the state's If extraterrestrial visitors are regarded as Department of Fish and Game. Either au- refugees, will they have any legal rights? In thority may declare a "special open season 6// an extraterrestrial commits many nations they won't. However, in the 20 on said game," or the agencies themselves a technical or so countries where the convention relat- may destroy an animal that is causing in- ing to the status of stateless persons has jury to human life or property. illegal entry, it may be subject been adopted, refugees do have the same rights as those held by any foreign national. BENEATH THE LAW to immediate (This may not amount to much— Uganda deportation. With rides on the Even if the extraterrestrial is somehow was a signatory even during Idi Amin's regarded as domita naturae ("a tame ani- shuttle costing regime — but at least it's a start.) In the mal"), its legal position hardly improves. United States, which is not a signatory to $4 million, this should prove Cruelty-to-animals laws exist in virtually all the convention, even stateless persons are the states, but this does not alter the crea- interesting!? protected by the Bill of Rights. tures' basic lack of rights. For instance, a ETs might also be viewed as aliens, per- surgical operation, even if it produces the sons owing allegiance to a foreign govern- most intense pain and suffering, may ment. Since other worlds are foreign, within nonetheless be considered justifiable and the meaning of the appropriate statutes, noncriminal if its purpose is to "make the be -either the perpetrator or the victim of extraterrestrials will most likely fall under animal useful to man." Thus the violent rape. this classification. In this country aliens, castration of a young horse or bull does not Paradoxically, if the female in question too, are protected by the Bill of Rights, and fall within laws prohibiting cruelty to ani- gives her consent and no force is used, the all are subject to the criminal jurisdiction of mals. And most statutes specifically ex- human member of the interspecies couple the United States. clude invertebrates. If an ET resembles a will be charged with the crime of bestiality PUBLIC OFFENDERS cross between a sea scorpion and a grass- (copulation with a beast) and may be pros- ____ hopper, it may have no protection what- ecuted under state sodomy statutes. There are countless subclasses of soever. These offenses traditionally carry stiff aliens. For example, an illegal alien is one The very idea of treating an extraterres- penalties. Not too long ago the common- who has entered the country without pass- trial visitor to our fair planet as a mere ani- law punishment for bestiality was death, ing through the normal channels of admis- mal may at first seem outrageous to many, sometimes by burning, sometimes by bury- sion administered by the U.S. Immigration but this is the letter, if not the spirit, of the ing alive. And as recently as 1953 eight and Naturalization Service. In a surprise- law. At various times in human history, states stipulated a maximum of life impris- contact scenario, the extraterrestrial visitor blacks, children, women, foreigners, pris- onment for such "crimes against nature." will commit a technical illegal entry and oners, and Jews have been regarded as The alien partner gets off scot-free in this thus may be subject to immediate deporta- nonpersons in one society or another. affair; since nonhuman animals cannot be tion proceedings. (With rides on the space Cetaceans of putative high intelligence are held guilty of criminal conduct. shuttle costing about $4 million just to low routinely slaughtered around the world for A few broad-minded jurists have sug- Earth orbit, this should prove interesting!) personalities of dog food. Even corporate gested that a "person" is a person not be- A related subclass is Ihe alien enemy , the one state are not considered "persons" in cause he is human but because rights and citizen of some hostile foreign power. If the another state unless they have strictly duties are ascribed to him. In this view, President feels that the landing of an ET complied with conditions set down by that becoming a person is like joining an exclu- may be a prelude to invasion, he is au- state to carry on business there. We should sive country club. If your appearance is thorized by law to order the federal mar- not expect ETs .to fare any better. acceptable, your references impeccable, shals to "apprehend, restrain, secure, and

How does all this relate to crimes involv- and your behavior vouched for by credible remove" all alien enemies, For the alien this ing off-world visitors? sponsors, you're in. could mean isolation, interrogation, and

Consider the crime of homicide. Statutes Ultimately, then, the granting of legal concentration camp. However, even if Con- 86 OMNI eist-CEHTURV FOBS

An interstellar gallery from the acknowledged master of realism in SF art

Uhris Foss painls spaceships too big for the horizon to hold. He gives form to intergalactic arks thai ramjet and ion-drive enlire civilizations trom one remote star system to another. Foss's eye for detail is meticulous. His ships endure explosions in space battles that often leave them scarred and blasted, limping home

an Clockwise trom above left a doglighi in space; "Sea-Horse in the SKy"; plains in interstellar cruiser; vessel lands al ready-made runways ol the Nazca Peru. Foss conveys massive size through attention to minute, precise detail. to monstrous continental dry docks. Foss says they are "very tatty spaceships." And the curiously antiquated qualities of his vehicles evoke memories of Edwardian ocean liners and World War 1 tanks. Yet his structures are post-modern, asymmetrical, immense, and totally unlike the needle-nosed and streamlined shapes of his predecessors. As a child in Devon, England, Chris was fascinated by the remains of the Industrial Revolution, its aging railway stations, the abandoned mines. Obsessed by speed, color, and hybrid technology, he built models of steam engines and rebuilt wrecked cars Irom scrap metal. Foss's ambition always was to become an artist, but to placate his

Clockwise from lower right: airbrush painting, "invasion irom Space": "The Machine in Shaft 10"; "Away and Beyond" shows a spaceport under attack: Foss's conceptualization of twin towers of Atlantis, the mythical metropolis.

£ The giant planetoids of Star Wars are the offspring of Foss's "crazed and rusted leviathans. 9 the spaceship. 9 • Next to the soul, the most beautiful object in the galaxy is

parents, he entered architecture school at Cambridge- While at the university. Foss sold a six-page cartoon strip to Bob Guccione (or his British Penthouse magazine. Guccione (later to publish Omni) was so impressed that he put the artist on retainer so that he could build up his portfolio. Within six years Foss grew into an internationally acclaimed science-iiction artist. Such authors as Asimov and Clarke asked specif- ically for him to illustrate their novels. Then came the films. Foss's imagery inspired a small army of imitators, including TV and movie designers. Foss was the first to conceptualize the crystalline planet Krypton for the movie Superman. Twentieth Century-Fox asked him to work on concepls for Alien. But perhaps Foss's most monumental works were executed tor a film that may never be completed. In 1975 Alejandro Jodorowsky (director of El Topo) was commissioned to film Frank Herbert's SF classic Dune, and he asked Foss to design the

impressive panoply ot the Padishah Empire. Jodorowsky says, "Foss is a being as real and unreal as his spaceships, a medieval goldsmith of future eons, and from him are born the leather and dagger-studded machines of the Sardaukers. the pachydermatous geometry of Em- peror Padishah's golden planet, the delicate butterfly plane and other machines thai will one day populate all ot interstellar space." OO

Clockwise from lower right: "Calchworld": a pilot ejects Irom stricken lighter ship in the design lor Perry Rhodan's The Vega Sector,- "Mission to the Stars": illustration lor the cover of John Varley's 7977 epic novel The Ophiuchi Hotline.

* ihiis style is influenced by J.M. W. Turner, the virtuoso painter of land, sea, and light. -'. • ' .

that phaser down piercing bursts of laser cannon and photon forty-year-olds started coming into toy an explosion and shuts not for nine seconds. torpedoes. In seconds, the target disinte- stores last year, especially males. And • Microvision, a Milton Bradley innovation grates, the result of a direct hit. Once again, only are older people buying toys; younger displays to repli- Big Trak has saved the day, kids are using the same toys, and they're that uses liquid-crystal television Pong games in hand- The vehicle described here is not the end displaying a sense of sophistication we cate the units. Interchangeable chips result ot some secret government contract never dreamed of a few years ago." held. $30 player to select any one of a half- but. rather, a toy built by Milton Bradley. "We're not that far from being able to allow the from Wars to bowling Designed for children aged eight to eighty, build a real R2-D2," says astrophysicist dozen games, Space Pong. Big Trak, with its intricate computer control Robert Doyle, inventor of Merlin, one of last to • Wildfire, hand-held pinball game that center, is typical of the- electronic toys that year's hottest-selling computer toys. Merlin a uses light-emitting diodes to re-create the will be displayed this holiday season. is a little red fellow that looks like a flippers, and balls. Syn- Department-store shelves will be over- Touchtone phone, sounds like R2-D2. and action of bumpers, the noise of the stocked with large, easy-to-use keyboard provides his master with a choice of six thesized sound duplicates real the machine even tilts. toys that will enable children to perform the games, including blackjack and ticktack- game, and • hand-held game with a simplest of programming tasks. "They're toe. Milton Bradley's Simon is a device akin Brain Baffler, a keyboard that priceless learning experiences," says a to the mother ship in Close Encounters of complete alphanumeric hangman, flashes representative of Milton Bradley, whose the Third Kind, complete with lights and scrambles words, plays randomly, and Simon computer game made electronic tones offered in increasingly difficult se- anagrams, shuffles letters total of six games sales history in 1978. "Toys such as Big Trak quences that must be repeated exactly by plays a word-based against either the computer or another will help children prepare for the sophisti- the player, cation of that great big computerized world "it's almost frightening to think," says Jeff player • Football II, more sophisti- out there." Spurred on by major technologi- Rochlis, president of Mattel Electronics, Electronic a Mattel original. It sold cal advances, today's toy manufacturers "that just two years ago there were only four cated version of the last year. This one have made more widespread use of micro- electronic items. This Christmas there will over a million units adds electronics than any other industry, And the be literally hundreds." Yet those four more players to the field and allows pass- public has responded eagerly. items— electronic football, auto racing, ing and lost yardage. This tremendous upsurge has been submarine chase games, and a brain- • Zodiac, an astrology computer from Co- figures, in matter of ten seconds, prompted largely by combining human teaser computer— grossed a respectable leco, It a imagination with the electronic micro- $21 million for the toy industry. By 1978 the the position of the moon and the planets for entered into processor, the same tiny silicon chips that figures had jumped 500 percent, to a any birthdate, time, and place figuring out one's sparked the intelligence of pocket cal- S112-million share of the $3.8-billion toy in- the unit. A book for with the computer. culators and eliminated the term sffefe rule dustry, This year toy manufacturers expect horoscope comes Mattel Horoscope Com- from the vocabulary of the 1970s. Already. electronics to register a staggering tenfold Another unit, the gives direct alphanumeric predic- toy companies have bought an estimated increase and push the industry into the puter, tions specific dates entered. 50 percent of the $500 million in chips pro- $5-billion sphere, for Intellivision. duced annually, and microprocessor- Parents who struggled in vain last And then there is Mattel's first computer controlled games have easily become the Christmas to locate Simon or Merlin may Intellivision is the home programmed, and it most sophisticated form of interaction find their problems severely compounded that doesn't have to be functions it does among average Americans. this year when they search for; has as many-game as programs. The system is "We're seeing a new world opening for • Phaser Guns, modeled on those in the record-keeping displayed on the color-television the toy industry" says Milton Bradley mar- Star Trek movie. They emit infrared bursts home resolution is precise keting executive George Ditomassi. "The coupled with synthesized audio. Hitting screen, and the that baseball players' caps can be tremendous cleanup we all experienced in another gun results in a ricochet sound; a enough 1978 was astounding. Far more twenty- to direct hit on the other gun's sensor triggers seen distinctly.

Milton Bradley's computerized Big Trak— the first completely programmable toy vehicle. The entire unit will sell for $500, with more croprocessor devices for the consumer" you turn off the switch, he forgets. That's memory capability— 16,000 bytes— than For example: voice synthesis. One of last called volatile memory. Once you get non- is now available for nearly twice the price. year's most intriguing developments was volatile RAM. you have a game that can "Toys," says Jim Mullen of the vanguard Texas Instruments' Speak & Spell, a small remember something about the personality microprocessor firm Texas Instruments, calculator that spells about 240 different of the player and address each one differ- "have become the frontier of consumer words and then pronounces them electron- ently. electronics." ically—re-creating the sound of human "The Speak & Spell unit shows how this Never was this more evident than at this speech from information digitally stored (no could be taken-even further, say to identify

year's American Toy Fair, held recently in tape or moving parts) in three chips the a child by name, by using voice analysis. I New York City. Sponsored by the American size of a thumbnail. don't think we're that far from a bank-teller Toy Association, the annual convention has Merlin inventor Doyle says the home- machine that will know your individual voice become a barometer for the world's leading computer, toy and game frontier is proba- print and greet you with something like, toy manufacturers, consistently forecasting bly expanding more rapidly than any other 'Good morning, Joe. Do you have a cold the direction that the industry is taking. Ev- industry. today?'"— something that's already been erywhere at the fair, there was an encounter "First of all," he says, "we're seeing a done by Michael Freeman, designer of ' with some form of electronic intelligence. tremendous increase every year in the Mego's 2-XL Robot, which is a sophisti- Buyers shuttled into a darkened chamber amount of memory available. Two years cated schoolroom robot that analyzes the for the presentation of yet another toy and ago we had one thousand bytes [a combi- voice patterns of students and remembers heard a demonstrator innocently announce nation of eight bits, or the amount of binary their particular weaknesses, that Star Rider will be "the hobbyhorse of digits needed to retrieve one letter from a "Children are just going to have to learn the twenty-first century." memory bank; four bits, or one half of a to play in a different way," says Frances Lights! Fanfare! Film clips! Enemy ships byte, equal to one nibble]. A typical game Noah, a buyer for two small toy shops in approaching! Sights! Phasers! Fire lasers! requires about seven hundred bytes just for North Carolina. Even as the noise of the demonstration the overhead of setting up the play. So we "I think we'll see two major fronts open up subsides, an overhead floodlight bathes had three hundred left. Now, last year we in the next two years," says inventor Doyle. the spaceship in pure white light while the had a two-thousand-byte capacity, which "Why shouldn't kids of all ages love this

Star Rider operator points out the salient gave us a lot more to work with once the stuff? We're all computers. We're all little indestructible features of the craft. basic functions were taken care of." adding machines. To a lot of people deal-

"This is really designed for a three-year- What happens to toys with a 4,000- or a ing with a computer sounds scary. The

old," he says, "but we've had up to a 5,000-byte capacity? thing to always remember is that it's not the

hundred twenty pounds on it with no prob- Besides voice synthesis and expanded computer you're confronting; it's no more or lem." memory. Doyle sees alterable memory less than the intelligence of the person who

Everywhere at the fair were the products banks and increasingly complex display- programmed it." of JS&A, the company that first popped the screen technologies making computer "Electronic chips have been the most in- electronic calculator on an unsuspecting games radically more sophisticated in credible introduction to the toy industry nation through ads in the Wall Street Jour- years to come. "In Merlin, for instance." he since plastic." says Coleco's president, Ar- nal seven years ago. "What we've seen till says, "we have forty-eight bvtes of RAM, or nold Greenburg. "By next year you'll see now," says Joe Sugarman, president of the read and alter [random or changeable! computerized dolls, trains, board games futuristic electronics firm, "has been a kind memory Until last year we had only ROM, or galore. This generation is having a love af- of first generation of electronic items- read-only [unchangeable] memory, You fair with electronics. These kids will be calculators, watches, and games. We've can program forty-eight units of musical much more scientific and more dexterous already seen a plateau in the pocket- information into Merlin, and he'll play the than any other generation. Our real prob-

calculator market, and now I think we're notes back— enough to play part of Bee- lem now is that science and technology are ning to see some sophisticated mi- thoven's Ninth. The problem is that once way ahead of mass marketing. "DO stand unless you have made some very velope design of the Smith house helps DREAM HOUSE careful observations. This cold air is then maintain moderate humidity levels year .-OHTIkjrDFF warmed by the earth [under the house], round. If the humidity rises above a com- rises slowly back into the air chamber, and fortable level, opening a door to the green- Jng wiih the architectural landscape is warms the inner wall; Because we have a house allows excess moisture to be quickly more easily accomplished than blending small volume of very cold air coming in absorbed by the envelope. with the natural environment. The Smith contact with the storage, considerably The U.S. government finally indicated its

house achieves the proper blend with both more heat can be transferred than if you interest in passive-solar technology last and does so without being bland. assume relatively warm air coming in con- January by placing~it on the select list of

The fact that there are no mechanical tact with the earth. I think, it's a really neat technologies that might significantly influ-

aids means no maintenance is needed and twist in people's concepts where- it has ence our national energy picture in the near also makes for a quiet home. This is one of been assumed all along that you had to use future, Mike Maybaum, program director the most striking benefits people accus- our nice high-powered, high-technology for passive solar in the Office of Conserva- tomed to hissing steam radiators, clanking solution, to find out that the lowest power, tion and Solar Application, described pas- pipes, and whining pumps will notice. The lowest technology anything, namely the sive solar as "an idea that can't help but shell also helps to off outside double ward ground that you build the house on, can be happen . . . and is already happening with-

noise, and the silence in the house is dis- the backup system. It's a nice louche." out the government." turbed only by the sounds of the refriger- The success of the house somewhat The Energy Department's "most impor- ator and. of course, of the party in progress surprised Doug Kelbaugh, an analyst at tant function in the area,". Maybaum said, around the Jacuzzi. Stanford Research Institute. He had mod- "may well be to do public relations for pas-

Smith's attainment of his last objec- eled the house for Smith a year before it sive solar and allow natural inventiveness tive—how the house affects his and his was built. His findings indicated that the to create building designs. Pressure to en-

family's- heallh— is difficult lo assess. Some house would use much more'fuej than it sure passage of- tax credits for passive- of the features, such as the mean radiant actually does. He had seen the preliminary solar construction isalso viewed as an im- temperature, the relative humidity, air-ex-. portant activity by the Energy Depart- change rates, and noise levels, yield some ment." data, but there is not even, an accepted Some advocates of passive solar are

standard by which to judge all these fac- skeptical about this benevolent attitude on tors. Even more difficult to measure are the the federal government's part. Bruce An- 6 1 could feel more subtle psychological benefits. For derson is one of the more vocal critics, He

- these we must merely depend on our own the house working quietly, stated this view quite clearly in a January senses. 'My impression of the house was 1979 interview: efficiently, and

that the. interior exuded gentleness. I could "Passive-solar design is the kind of feel the house working quietly and effi- that left a powerful impression. technology and knowledge whose proper ciently, and this made a powerful impres- Coming from application is very regionalized, even sion. Coming from the noise of New York localized. It's impossible tor people in New York City, I particularly City, I particularly appreciated the absence Washington [D.C.] to be properly sensitive

of mechanical noise. Other visitors' com- appreciated the to all the thermodynamic and social ramifi- - ments: "It makes you aware of subtle differ- absence of mechanical noised cations of using [passive-solar design]

ences in climate." "Comfortable in my properly, I can tell you that people up here jeans and T-shirt even when it's twelve de- [in New Hampshire] know more about

grees Fahrenheit outside." And "I haven't building than anyone in Washington ever had to compromise my living style in the will. Anything the Energy Department does least." Members of a ski group who lease in this area will vastly complicate proce- Leone's house knew little about solar en- plans and had added large floor vents to dures for using passive. In fact, it's just not ergy but quickly learned how the house "improve the air flow." Smith never in- that complicated a business. It's a com- operated. Smith feels that this attunement stalled them. monsense kind of thing." process is a subtle benefit of living in a Much less a cause of disagreement are Common sense or not, Smith's house

house that uses natural energy flows. It the many problems ol conventional hous- was made possible only by the combined should play a major part in overcoming ing that have been overcome in Smith's efforts of many people, whom Smith consumer resistance to such homes. house. In most homes "ghost drafts" are characterizes as "not experts, only people A clearer picture of possible heat-flow produced by a thin layer of air being chilled with sincere and professional attitudes." In- mechanisms at work in the Smith house by cold surfaces, such as windows. These terest in the design concepts used in the was provided by solar experimenter Philip draffs occur even in tightly sealed houses. construction of this house is growing Henshaw, whose method of studying air The double-shell construction affords rapidly. Architects and builders are talking

currents and temperatures in passively fewer cold surfaces to produce the drafts. about it; it was the subject of several semi- heated buildings has been the subject of Summertime ventilation is dramatically im- nars at the national passive solar confer- recent controversy. Controversy notwith- proved by the introduction of cool air in the ence in San Jose, California; Smith himself standing, his last paper on passive solar crawl space and by opening the clerestory has received thousands of requests for in- heat was among 33 reports chosen as the windows. The mild breeze created gives a formation this past year. He told me recently

best of 1978 by the International Solar En- sensation of much lower temperatures. For that he would like to see 1 00 of these homes ergy Society. Henshaw's description of example, at 85°F and with an 80-percent built in the United States in the coming year. mechanisms in the Smith house, which he relative humidity, a 3.5-mile-per-hour Is Smith's dream house the house of the

insisted must be verified by direct observa- breeze can make you feel as if the tempera- future? Perhaps. Smith said, "Our goal is

tion, mentions "air in contact with the outer ture is 75°F simplicity, and we rejoice in it. The house

wall, which is chilled and falls rapidly down Central heating systems dry out room air, . . . will probably be remembered more for in a stream or possibly in a series ol pulses. causing unhealthy as well as uncomfort- what was thrown away than for what was

It is this, air that goes into the crawl space able effects. Besides drying out mucous put in." DO rather than a movement of the entire one- membranes, dry air makes moisture

foot-thick section of air. [It was previously evaporate from the body, causing chills For further information, write to Tom Smith, thought that the air mass moved uniformly even in a warm house. Aided by double Positive Technology Corporation, P.O. Box as a whole,] This is very difficult to under- vapor barriers in critical areas, the en- 2356, Olympic Valley, Calif. 95730. go OMNI "

to take him to "Don't be a bore, darling. We'll take the "But — but— I was going ." see, the kid and his old man, no-sleep and amuse ourselves . . Her fin- the park, pitch a few balls MALTHUS'S gers tickled behind his ear. and—and— you know— fishing. We've CC-N-iNJLDF^OMFW. 7» "Boredom," Phil muttered again. "Can't around, and maybe take him right here in the vil- for six more whole hours, my got a beautiful pond "that subject will be limited to the iood even see him, the " lage. Even, if we had time, the old swim- brought with us. However, you may eat very own — we old-fashioned if ming hole. You know, simple, have chosen." Herve cleared his throat. 'As for that, whatever you ." like did_with their kids in the you just want to see the subject . . things, dads Phil frowned and reached out a hand ."

"Yeah, hey, good old days . . with fingers properly positioned; a servo Phil's frown disappeared. the park After all, we The doctor shook his head. "No, flashed out of the waif and inserted a now that's real blue of you, Doc. ." fine— these . . sounds lighted smokestick in -them. "I can't even waited all weeks quick adjust- (Checked out, Shirza'') give him a taste?" The medic made some top of the (Need you ask, Herve!) "Not permitted. I'm very sorry" ments, and the opaque sides and " able to fish or swim carrier slowly brightened and cleared, until — but you won't be (Shirza, damn it, what kind of briefing-) can play with your fully revealed. The subject, or play ball. But you (They were briefed, Herve. Not our fault it its inside was picnic, show for simple loincloth, was subject on the grass, have a didn't stick.) naked except a subject likes sweet- lying a soft white surface and was at- him around. The "That seems pretty unfair," Phil muttered. on ." equipment. smelling things, bright colors . . if all he tached to various pieces of "I. mean, how can I enjoy my treats, "The pond, then, Doctor," Janica sug- or what- Phil gasped. is— I don't know, soyameal, gets ornamentals Janica drew back, instinctively covering gested. "We have some lovely ever you've picked. I mean, it's my day. How meals?" her gaping mouth with a trembling hand. in it— Vegan, I think." come / don't get to pick the baby's what's the mat- "Vegan? Is the pond seal-topped?" (Shirza!) Phil spoke first. "What— 1 never stuck. "Why, I — I don't know, my "You can pick your own meals, Citizen ter with him?" professional hand in. Just looked. Noticed it in passing." Jones-Vishinsky, but for medical reasons "Matter?" The doctor's (It's sealed, Herve.) we must see that the subject's diet is care- (Good. Might've known you wouldn't fully monitored." miss anything as obvious as that. 1'd've "Ya. Thought you said he was A-okay." it hated to tell them no, after the way I built sick if "He is, he is. But he could get very up, but— contamination . . .) everyone just stuffed him with goodies all mOne of the white- M-day, 0930. The village park was of the time. You do see that, don't you? So we about average size, with grassy walks, had to make a rule: diet administered by clad medics spoke. "Stand of art here and there, for bursts of color. Works medics only. If we made an exception out of our way, from old-fashioned solid statues (made of you, well, we couldn't refuse anybody else, please. We've a tight modern synthetics, though) to the newest either. One treat might not hurt, but treats ." sight/taste/sound synergies. (Several of every day . . schedule to Janica's light-sculpts were prominently Phil pouted. maintain." They pushed displayed.) The pond, with its fluorescent "Oh, Phil," Janica said, "don't be such a Vegan gauzes. Nooks with seating, nooks bore. He's right; rules are rules. That's the past . . . and Phil couple of rezball her vast experience without. Shade trees. A way it always is." (From after stood staring them3 courts. The usual. of once before.) was chasing a butterfly. "Oh." He looked unappeased. He The baby Most of the village inhabitants who had tousled his thick robin's-egg-blue mane not been personally invited to join the party and continued to look sulky; then he were out in the park, too, but maintaining a thought of another grievance. "You say— "Nothing's the matter with polite distance. Most were content simply hasn't he got a name, anyway? You say he pride was hurt. He's a beautiful 'mal- to watch, with far-lenses, but many were won't wake until oh six hundred?" him, nothing at all. " making holo records, despite the fact that Herve directed a burning look of re- gam. A perfect specimen — They were expecting the professional holo-porters were hover- proach at Shirza, who rolled her eyes sky- (Herve, you idiot! ing overhead, taking everything down. ward. someone older!) Janica was preening. She was taking "His name is Johann Meadows-Singh. (Deleted!) and the 'porters "This is our very newest 'rnalgam for this advantage of the attention And he will be awakened at aught six six by running through a whole series of her hundred." sector. He was decanted less than warm-up routines. When that palled, she "Nyaa. How come not until then? How months ago. We've accelerated his growth took off her brightly colored halter top and come not the whole day? It's my day, isn't it?" somewhat, but—" enticingly near the any hair? And why's dragged it by one tie "Oh, Phil!" Janica exclaimed. "He has to "Why hasn't he got why's he so small? baby. With a crow of triumph, the baby sleep just like anybody else, doesn't he? his head so big? And staggered toward the brilliant fluttering We won't lose any more time than anybody And-" normal this cloth. Laughing, Janica backed up, keep- else." "I assure you, that's all at ing the fascination just out of the reach of "Boredom! Why can't he do like anybody stage of his development. His hair and the later. But our the chubby fingers. else who wants to put off sleeping for a day rest of his teeth will come devel- This gave Phil an idea. "You know," he I subjects at this or two? Let him have some no-sleep like surrogates beg for just I ball opment level. Babies they used to be said to the doctor, "if had a and use." ." can stretch out your hands and sort of rolled it toward him . . "But he'd have to make it up later, dear. called. You stagger/toward you on uncertain With a wink, the doctor produced a just like you do." She moved almost imper- he'll shimmering ball, and Phil, grinning broadly, ceptibly on the lounge she was curled up legs-" rolled it gently along the grass toward the on, and Herve automatically licked his "He can't watt!" think were de- burbling child. suddenly dry lips. "So it wouldn't be fair, "Oh, Phil, do you you The child abandoned the top for the ball, dear heart, to make somebody else have canted knowing how to walk?" can't Janica pouted, I know! You sure he and less, just so -we could have more." She "How should approached her. Her stretched-and Herve licked his lips walk?" A stranger shyly smile at him was warmer than usual. little, I said. Most surrogate again— to walk her fingers up Phil's flung- "Just a as children to walk." "Look," his voice was soft, almost a out arm. parents love teaching

" " . .

it to whisper, his face beet-red under a too-thin "I hope not," she purred. Then, more depression, out of nowhere seemed amber paint job. "You don't know me, but loudly, "Phil, darling, how about letting Ali him, and he swerved frantically. I'm visiting a friend in this village today— here get a few close-ups?" She screamed and began running to- (Strictly illegal, but winked at by the securi- "Sure thing." He didn't know the guy but ward him, waving the flower like a banner.

if for the Herve roared. ty officers, if not overly abused. After all, if he was a friend of Janny's . . "Watch out baby!" someone said, "This is my new termhus— Ali took several shots from various an- Sylvie could never have stopped him, not or termwife— probationary, we haven't got- gles, and soon everyone was showing off without hurting the baby. But his frantic her ten around to registering it yet," most sec- for him, laughing, catching the ball and swerve to avoid tier gave Janica flashing, charged up offs would smile and pass on, after thor- throwing it, playing to make the baby laugh chance, Legs she oughly checking the newcomer out, o1 (Sylvie was amazingly successful with behind him. An impossible leap, and she ' course.) "My name's Ali Pavlov-Lee, and nothing but sticking her tongue out and was sailing over his head, every light- acting with per- really hate to ask, but could I take a few crossing her eyes], all under the eyes of sculpting-trained muscle soared, she flipped, holos of the kid? i mean, who—knows when their friends, the holos, the professional fect precision. As she I'll get another chance, "and holo-'corders. too, and her hands darted out. And when He really was very good-looking, and Ali made his move with startling sudden- she landed, lightly, on her feet, just as Syl- Jariica's voice deepened. "You didn't need ness. He tossed his camera at Phil, who vie crashed head on into Ali, the baby was to ask. Plenty of the others are taking holos. was closest to the baby. As Phil automati- safely nestled in her arms, Just because you aren't a member of this cally caught the flying object with both And it was all over village— he may be ours today, but he's hands, Ali swooped down and scooped up Firm hands pulled Sylvie to her feet, and just for everybody's baby, all the time. You have the the chortling child and was off and running. she embraced her friend, and a same rights as anybody else." A slow smile "Stop, you fool," Shirza shouted and second she felt in her own arms a soft, dirty, her crying, smelly grew over her face. "But it was sweet of you began chasing after him, afraid to use baby he'd fallen, crying, sur- to ask to make sure it was all right." weapons because of the child. "There's no Ali lay where "Oh." Impossibly, his blush deepened piaceyou can go—" rounded by grim secoffs. "She only wanted even more. "1 know that. Only, see, mytele- In seconds a mob was forming in pursuit, a baby of her own," he sobbed. 'A day, we hoio's broken. I'd have to come close, to be but Ali had picked his direction shrewdly only had a day. It wasn't enough. She close, to get any good shots." There were no cottages between him and wanted a baby of her own. She said she'd

I her She pinched his cheek lightly. "Of open country, and no people, either. leave me if didn't get her a baby of ." course, sweetie. Take as many as you Except Sylvie, who had wandered away own, her own, a baby of her own . . want." A sly sidewise glance. "You can re- to pick a spectacularly luscious tiger- (Herve and Shirza exchanged glances turn the favor sometime." striped trumpetbloom for the baby. Syivie over his oblivious head. Two for the treat-

up, center . . "Thanks. I — you know, he's the first I've heard the screams, straightened and ment .) Then Herve took the baby, and Sylvie's seen, for real, I mean, up close. I— I really saw the man clasping the baby and head- directly her. felt strangely empty. appreciate this, I do. I won't forget you— ing almost toward arms your kindness." Ali saw the woman rise up out of her little The rest of M-day was sadly anticlimac- tic, after the attempted baby stealing, and the whole affair served as a subject for

' conversation and holos, professional and amateur. Such a heroine Janica was! And have you seen her latest sculpture? And when newer sensations made memories fade, holos got shoved to the back of stor- age and were eventually wiped or dis- carded. Only Syivie could not forget the pow- dery-soft skin against her lips, the sweet- sour baby scent, the odd feeling that had welled up within her when she held the baby within the circle of her arms. Sometimes, during rest periods, with her termhus snoring exhaustedly and satiated-

ly beside her, she would think about it, but her thoughts always went round and round in the same circle. Babies were only decanted at the POP centers, to replace the rare accidental deaths, computer-directed recombinant amalgams to replace lost genes and tal- ents. There was no way she could ever produce a baby herself, no way she could

have a baby of her own. No way . . And sooner or later she'd nudge Ray until he roused enough to offer her the only anodyne he could. But all too often, after- wards, he'd slide back into contented slumber, while she lay, unable even to dis- tract herself with soloholo lenses, because her thoughts stayed in the same groove no matter what amusements the soloholo pre- sented. No way— only decanted at POP cen-

ters—no way— No way . . . OO be part of psychology is steadfastly re- tual instances of fraud and the use of the irUTERV/IEUU jected by psychologists in particular. This fraud hypothesis to invalidate all the find- CONTINUED FROM PAGE 82 is so because they are hopelessly preju- ings. Parapsychology would be unique if diced against it or because, on indepen- no parapsychoiogist ever committed fraud. plication in the next decade? dent inspection, it seems as if there's sim- The fact that there is one known instance of

Sargent: That is a valid point. Yet it is un- ply nothing in it. fraud is not particularly bothering. Take the reasonable to expect rapid progress in a Sargent: There does seem to be a signifi- Ganzfeld work— twelve laboratories have field that has had such pitifully small fund- cant subset of people who are emotionally done repeat studies, and of these, seven ing and has been put on its heels by skep- prejudiced against the idea. But let's take have gotten significant results. Maybe tics who have always demanded results those who are rational agnostics and say, there is a Levy in that seven, but it doesn't

rather than theories. I would rather have an "Maybe there's something there, but at the matter, because the replicability rate will experiment that was replicated fifty per- moment I'm not convinced." Two things still be better than fifty percent. To explain

it cent of the time and I knew why worked probably concern them. away that finding, you'd have to invoke a than one that was ninety-percent replica- One is the lack of a theoretical base for degree of fraud that would be staggering. ble but whose mechanics were a mystery. the subject. The other— and this is particu- Omni: This highlights again how important Omni: Nevertheless, fifty years of para- larly prevalent among psychologists — is a replicability is.

psychological research has gone by, and worry about whether the data are reliable or Sargent: Yes, it's vital. Without indepen- most scientists are very disappointed in it. merely represent experimental fraud. Why dent replication, all the experiments in the

Sargent: That isn't actually true. There's a should there be so much emphasis on world don't add up to anything. It's ihe only survey in the Journal of Parapsychology of fraud? To be blunt, I don't have much hesi- protection against fraud, experimental er-

American scientists' attitudes to parapsy- tation in saying that the reason why psy- ror, and all that. I once did an experiment in

chology in the Thirties and Forties, and chologists are suspicious of parapsychol- which, to the best of my knowledge, I elimi-

comparable surveys today show that there ogists "fiddling" their experiments is that nated any possibility that I could have been

has been a marked shift since then toward they do it themselves all the time. So they tampering with the data. It involved sealed acceptance of its validity. People also say think that fudging is as endemic in para- envelopes, deposited suitcases, witness- that it hasn't made much headway, but I'm psychology as it is in psychology. es, Xerox copies. The whole thing was a convinced this is actually due to ignorance. Omni: Since fudging has been raised as panorama of paranoia. And we indeed did

If you were to pluck out a psychologist at an issue, let's talk about the scandal a few get significant results that replicated the random, the odds against his having actu- years ago when Dr Walter J. Levy, one of results of an earlier experiment.

ally seen a copy of the Journal ol Parapsy- the most influential figures in parapsychol- Then I presented the data at a confer- chology, for instance, would be very sub- ogy, was caught red-handed blatantly fid- ence where, to my amazement, the whole stantial indeed. dling his results. rigmarole was rejected on the grounds that

Omni: That's really my point. If the subject Sargent: Yes, that was a bad moment for any experimenter who is smart enough to

is all it's cracked up to be, this ignorance is parapsychology, but it wasn't the end of the think up a foolproof procedure is surely astonishing. Something that really should world. We have to distinguish between ac- smart enough to get around it. In the end it's got to be a question of replication. Omni: A few parapsychologists argue that

repeatability isn't all that important. Sargent; That's nonsense of course, but remember that high repeatability is only typical of certain areas of the physical sci-

ences. It's not characteristic of anything but the tiniest areas of human sciences. The only areas of psychology that have very high replicability are certain areas of psychophysics and classical conditioning. In both you are dealing with ludicrously oversimplified environments. You say parapsychology has been in ac- tion for fifty years and hasn't achieved much. That may be true. But experimental psychology has been going for about a

hundred years, and what has it achieved? One of my lecturers at Cambridge, in a debate, challenged the audience to list the real achievements of psychology. There was a pause of about a minute before somebody came out with something. Sorry to keep sniping at psychology, but my argument is that the only realistic data base against which to examine the achievements of parapsychology is psy- chology. Remember the sheer complexity of one's subject matter in both cases. Human beings are phenomenally complex systems. When physics starts playing

around with complex systems, it soon gets into trouble. Faced with a really complex problem, people with billions of dollars and years of specialized research behind them are capable of spectacular failure. Omni: One other factor that prevents many hard scientists from taking the subject seri- better-based, and more reputable work. I are concerned with. Parapsychology has ously is the wayin which the field some- think that serious parapsychologists, as a always enjoyed a tremendous level of gen- times into goes crazes about sensationalis- body, never took Geller to heart. eral public support. The priority for the field ts developments, such as the recent flap Omni: The cautious, guarded picture you now is to increase scientific acceptance. about Uri Geller. Here's Geller claiming to paint of the topic is very different from the Only in that way is the subject going to get with his bend spoons mind or to teleport his one the public sees in the media, As the adequate funding and draw in high-caliber camera to the moon. Anyone who knows public sees it, everything is totally sewn up, people who aren't thinking, "This is finan- anything about parapsychology realizes with an endless stream of sensational ex- cial and academic suicide." I don't think that Geller simply reeks of trickery Yet he periments and equally dramatic results that the practical, pragmatic aspect of the precipitated a huge wave of enthusiasm occurring all the time. subject, which is the angle you seem to be throughout parapsychology. When it all Sargent: I'm very skeptical, -but I studi- stressing, is the key factor as far as the turned nothing, it to left many parapsychol- ously avoid any connection with these un- scientific community is concerned. They're ogists with their egg on face. salubrious characters in the military field. more likely to be swayed by improvements Sargent: This may sound like ducking the As for the so-called Russian effort, well, the in repeatability of the kind we have been

issue, but I actually have a minimal interest first thing to say is that there is virtually slowly no seeing over the last twenty years. I in that kind of thing. I've inter- never been Soviet parapsychology reporting that is believe there is also going to be increasing ested in working with individuals, only with worth even acursory glance. Parapsychol- theoretical sophistication. Parapsycholo-

groups of people. I So can make general- ogy is treated oddly by the Soviet hierarchy, gists will be able to sit down and say that

izations about populations. I would be en- who try to pass it off as lots of different they have models of what is going on when couraged if I felt that Geller-type phenom- sciences. In any case, such stuff as is pub- ESP takes place, that they have tested the ena induced other people to start looking lished appears to take place selectively in assumptions of the models, and so on. into parapsychology, but I'm quite sure they low-level magazines, where the data are I would also hope for increasing interdis- have the opposite effect. With the whole never presented in sufficient detail. I've ciplinary links, particularly with psychol- Geller episode, so much drivel was written known visitors to the USSR who have come ogy, and even with things like at second- and thirdhand, pro and con, that back and said that talk of big Soviet re- neurophysiology. Neurophysiology may be it is very hard to get at what has really been search is all baloney. As for the popular looking a bit far ahead. Better acceptance going on there. books on the subject published in the West, in academic psychology would be enough. feeling, for My what it is worth, is that they're purely sensationalist, written by The greatest breakthrough of all both for

Geller is definitely It a fake. seems to me journalists who sincerely want to be rich. scientific acceptance and in terms of at- that there are enough documented in- Omni: I think people would like to know tracting proper research funding would stances of definite trickery tor us to be able whether there is any hope that anything will occur if a couple of top psychologists fi- to say this. Whether he's anything more happen in the reasonably near future to nally stepped forward and said, "Fair than that, I don't know. But of course one remove the skepticism of parapsychology enough, you've made your case, We'll get that does annoyed when stuff is out of the areas ofdispute and skepticism. stake our reputations on it. Furthermore, splashed about to the exclusion of sounder, Sargent: It depends on who and what you we're going to work in it." OQ ments of naturalization; so an ET could re- and a sentient nonhuman being of the op- tain its native extraterrestrial nationality, a posite, similar, or complementary sex. ALIENS rather unique sort of dual citizenship. These rules will be closely modeled after CONTINUED FROM PAGE 86 If beings from other worlds come to live the old miscegenation statutes, which the gress declares war on the visitor's home among us in greater numbers and on a Supreme Court ruled unconstitutional in planet, there is another little-known sub- more permanent basis, the legal "quick Loving v. Commonwealth of Virginia (1967). class of aliens in international law called fixes" we've been discussing may prove (This decision cannot invalidate xenogamy friendly enemies. One jurist explains, "A wholly inadequate. Congress undoubtedly statutes, since species, unlike race, has belligerent state is free to exempt enemy will be forced to take the next major juridical never been ruled a "suspect classification" nationals from the treatment applied to step: create a special legal classification under the equal protection clause of the persons vested with enemy character" called extraterrestrial persons that would Fourteenth Amendment.) The immigration technicalities can be define their rights and duties in American Entirely new criminal codes might have circumvented by classifying an ET as an society Many of our laws may have to be to be enacted for situations beyond the essential alien. According to law, with the thoroughly revamped to accommodate the pale of normal human experience. For in- concurrence of the attorney general, the complex relations inherent in any multi- stance, for a race of sentient limb- CIA director and the commissioner of im- species sentient population, regenerative amphibians, nibbling the body of an acquaintance may be a sign of migration, any alien deemed "essential to THE CODE OF XENORABI the furtherance ot the national intelligence greeting and approval, much as the human mission" or otherwise vita! to the interests ot Consider, once again, the criminal law. In handshake is. All parts quickly grow back, national security may be admitted for per- order to emphasize the illegality of killing and no real permanent damage is done; manent residence regardless of regular and to provide special punishments in the bigger the bite, the deeper the friend- admission procedures. Since any nation on specific cases, lawmakers should define ship. Human beings, unable to regenerate Earth in possession of an extraterrestrial the crime of xenocide— the slaying of an nibbled limbs, would regard the behavior being and its fancy hardware could gain a extraterrestrial person by any other legal as criminal (petit cannibalism) when prac- significant military, technological, or eco- ticed on people. nomic jump on the others, the essential- Innumerable possibilities may readily be alien dodge is certainly within the realm of imagined. Involuntary vility could be the possibility. crime of exposing one's true, uncamou- There are even easier ways to avoid the flaged physical appearance in public, if 4A crime for telepathic immigration laws. The creature might be that appearance is so shockingly ugly as to considered an alien crewman (serving extraterrestrials cause hysteria among human onlookers. A foreign vessel) or an alien in tran- crime for telepathic ETs would be telerape, aboard a is telerape, the unlawful mind- thought-reading of the ol sit. Both would be exempt because their the unlawful mind stay in this country would be only tempo- reading of one or both partners of a human couple, the without their consent, while they are having rary Similarly, if a space visitor entered human sexual partners, United States for "business or pleasure" or sex. without their "bona fide student, scholar, specialist, as a OTHERWORLDLY DEFENSES ' or leader in a field of specialized knowl- consent, during the course Naturally, all charges ot criminal culpabil- edge or skill," it would be considered a of coitus. 3 visiting alien and thus be exempt from im- ity are subject to defenses that may be migration laws. raised to relieve an extraterrestrial of liabil- Of course, the President could simply ity for Its acts. One recourse for harried assert lack grant an ET ambassadorial status. As a full defense attorneys would be to diplomat, the extraterrestrial would serve of capacity on the part of the ET A plea ot variant. as the representative of its own government person. Xenocide could be committed with insanity is the most common Under traditional Rule, criminal during its stay on Earth and would enjoy full or without malice, intentionally, negligently, the M'Naghten extraterrestrial could immunity from prosecution in American or accidentally. If an ET possesses no per- acts committed by an courts. Or the creature might be deemed a sonal consciousness but is part of a group be excused if the ET was unable to under- consul, merely a commercial agent for its mind that is deemed, collectively, to be an stand the nature of its act or, it it knew what it government and entitled to fewer im- extraterrestrial person, then killing any in- was doing, lacked the capacity to distin- munities. dividual member of the association might guish whether its act was right or wrong. Normally there must be diplomatic reci- be termed semicide. Like mayhem, the Lack of capacity might also be proved by procity before a foreign envoy of any kind is criminal act is directed only to a part of the evidence of mental immaturity, infancy, or given ambassadorial rank. However, con- person's substance and not to the whole. feeblemindedness, the intelligence or the stitutionally, the Chief Executive of the Legislators will probably want to invoke psychosocial development of the alien United States is our sole representative in legal sanctions against those who engage being comparatively below the human dealings with foreign nations. Neither Con- in interspecies sexual relations. Humans adult norm, at the time the crime was com- gress nor the judiciary can complain if the are already covered by felony sodomy mitted. President unilaterally makes the decision to statutes; the equivalent offense for sentient Another limitation on criminal prosecu- recognize an ET and its government. nonhumans could be called anthroposex- tions is that an accused cannot be tried for Yet another option is open, this time to us — unlawful sexual activity with human acts that were not criminal when they were Congress. The naturalization clause of the beings. More specific sanctions of this of- committed. If a human, to take a simple U.S. Constitution expressly authorizes the fense against public decency are likely to example, killed an alien in ajurisdiction that federal legislature to prescribe rules by be passed by state senators and assem- had not yet ruled the ET a "person" at the which aliens may secure full citizenship. blymen. There may be classifications, such time of the offense, then the application of There is nothing to prevent a grant of Amer- as prostitutional anthroposexus, forcible any criminal law that spoke only of "per- ican citizenship to named persons by spe- anthroposexus, adulterous anthroposexus, sons" would be prohibited under the U.S. cial act. For instance, Congress passed in and anthroposexus by seduction, each Constitution (Article I, Section 9). 1963 one such' bill, which directed the Pres- with its own sel of proscriptions and pecu- One highly unorthodox alternative would ident to declare Sir Winston Churchill an liar penalties. be the assertion of sociobiology as a honorary citizen of the United States. This Laws may also be passed to prohibit defense in criminal prosecutions. Such a approach bypasses the usual require- xenogamy, the marriage between a human "sociobiology doctrine" could expunge all 108 OMNI liability for acts committed as a direct con- there would be two additional complica- Life-fractions might be an appropriate sequence of biologically predetermined tions that would have to be considered. unit of punishment. For instance, the sen- behavioral patterns in specific situations. First, an accused ET could not be tried, tence for voluntary manslaughter is usually

Under the doctrine, intelligent trisexual sentenced, or punished unless it was ten years, a life- fraction of about 14 percent

extraterrestrials (requiring three distinct "presently sane." If it could not understand for human beings who live to age seventy. sexes for reproduction) would be excused the nature and purpose of the proceedings By this measure, an alien creature guilty of of the crime of bigamy or polygamy. A sen- against it, the creature might be judged the same crime but with a normal life span tient praying mantoid that, during normal incapable of standing trial and be commit- of seven years should receive only a single

intercourse, bit off the head of a careless ted to a mental institution until it is capable. year of incarceration. But ETs with 700-year

human zoologist-observer, instead of the If it were determined that the alien would life spans should be locked up for a century torso of her mindless mate, could raise not achieve competency in the near future. or more. "protein hunger" as a valid defense to the then the authorities would have to either Stiffer sentences might be appropriate crime of homicide. ETs modeled after the release the accused or institute permanent for xenocidal acts committed against common mole Antichinus stuarti, among commitment proceedings. longer-lived or more highly intelligent or which copulation causes the females to re- Second, the Sixth and the Fourteenth sensitive species. All else equal, killing a

lease hormones that kill the male shortly amendments require an "impartial jury" millennial sentient may deserve ten times thereafter, might use the doctrine to es- both in federal and in state criminal prose- as much punishment as an act resulting in cape prosecution for murder. Extraterres- cutions. Generally, jurors must be chosen the death of a mere centennial human, With trials having the same compulsion to steal from representative cross sections of the crimes of kidnapping or false imprison- as the Ad^lie penguins of Antarctica might community. Exclusions on the basis of race, ment, however, punishment should be in- be excused of the crime of petty larceny national origin, or descent are unconstitu- creasingly severe when more ephemeral

It is not clear whether courts would buy tional. If at least one juror of the ET's own victims are inconvenienced, since a the sociobiology doctrine. Claims of com- species were not empaneled, any convic- greater percentage of total life time has pulsion and coercion generally are no de- tion resulting from the trial could later be been disrupted through the investigation of fense when the compulsion derives from overturned on this basis. a criminal act. some natural characteristic of the defen- After the extraterrestrial was declared The silvery disc murmurs softly its dis- dant. Courts have thus far rejected insanity guilty as charged, appropriate punishment appointment and glows a faint warning of pleas based on the XYY-chromosome de- would be handed down from the bench. orange-red luminescence around its fect (the extra Y supposedly causes a The notion that the alien nature of the de- perimeter. The fallen humanoid briefly higher probability of antisocial behavior), fendant should be taken into account leads sparkles, then vanishes, A hushed crowd but there is strong evidence that the to the concept of pro rata sentencing. ETs falls back as the extraterrestrial machine

judiciary would accept this defense if there with shorter life spans or whose subjective rises majestically Its masters will not return existed rigorous scientific proof tying the time passes measurably faster than our soon, for they have learned that illegal genetic defect to insanity. own should be given shorter prison terms, aliens aren't safe on planet Earth, Before the case went to trial, however. and vice versa. At least, not yet. DO would give you more time."

"You did distract him." I reassured her. BEAST "He watched you and didn't watch me. Jake- what kind of a creature has blue-

wrapped it around her. "My Captain, green blood?" ComputerLand® "I don't someday I want one like this." know."

"I'll skin the minks personally." I prom- Sharpie came forward, squatted down,

ised her. dabbed a linger in the blood, sniffed it.

Deety started to shrug the cape off. "Too "Hemocyanin. I think," she said calmly.

hvv.fi .,>,'. hot, lovely as it feels." She stopped with the "Deety, you were right. Alien. The largest of cape oft her shoulders, suddenly pulled it terrestrial fauna with that method "oxygen 94i-81E4 776-8080 the transport is a lobster. But this thing is no _ds Angeles. CA around her again. "Who's coming up = hill?" lobster; it's a Black Hat. How did you Sacrameiito, CA 770-0131 that Hilda had know?" I looked up, saw Jake and 3S6-6833 reached the pool—and a figure was ap- "I didn't. But, he didn't sound right.

fuss ; pearing from below, beyond the boulder Rangers are polite. And they never .;

I "I "I don't know. Stay behind me." hurried "I didn't know," I admitted. wasn't sus-

' toward the pool. picious, just annoyed." The stranger was dressed as a federal "You moved mighty fast," Jake ap- proved. ranger. As I closed in. I heard the stranger say to Jake. "Are you Jacob Burroughs?" "I never know why till it's over. You didn't 430-1877 "Why do you ask?" waste time yourself, tovarich. Drawing

"Are you or aren't you? If you are. I have saber while he was pulling a gun— that : ';.: i ,k> business with you. If you're not, you're takes guts and speed. But let's not talk trespassing. Federal land, restricted ac- now. Where are his pals? We may be cess." picked off getting back to the house." Hilda "Jake!" I called out. "Who is he?" "Look at his pants," suggested. The newcomer turned his head. "Who "He hasn't been on horseback. Hasn't are you?" climbed far. either. Jacob, is there a jeep

"Wrong sequence." I told him. "You trail?" haven't identified yourself." "No. This isn't accessible by jeep, just "Don't be funny," the stranger said. "You barely by horse."

know this uniform. I'm Bennie Hibol, the "Hasn't been anything overhead," I 492-B882 ranger hereabouts." added. "No chopper, no air car." Highball. craft." said Deety. "<« I answered most carefully. "Mr. "Continua 5';t you are a man in a uniform, wearing a gun "Huh?" belt and a shield. That doesn't make you a "Zebadiah, the Black Hats are aliens federal officer. Show your credentials and who don't want Pop to build a time-space

state your business." machine. We know that. So it follows that The uniformed character sighed. "I got they have continua craft. Q.E.D."

it. no time to listen to smart talk." He rested his I thought about "Deety, I'm going to hand on the butt of his gun. "If one of you is bring you breakfast in bed. Jake, how do Burroughs, speak up. I'm going to search we spot an alien continua craft? It doesn't this site and cabin. There's stuff coming up have to look like Gay Deceiver." from Sonora; this sure as hell is the transfer Jake frowned. "No. Any shape. But a point." one-passenger craft might not be much Deety suddenly came- out from behind larger than a phone booth." me, moved quickly, and placed herself be- "If it's a one-man —one-alien— job, it

side her father. "Where's your search war- should be parked down in that scrub," I rant? Show your authority!" She had the said, pointing. "We can find it," cape clutched around her; her face quiv- "Zebadiah," protested Deety, "we don't ered with indignation. have time to search. We ought to get out of "Another joker!" This clown snapped here! Fas(.'" open his holster. "Federal land— here's my Jake said, "My daughter is right, but not authority!" for that reason. Its cratt is not necessarily

Deety suddenly dropped the cape, waiting. It could be parked an infinitesimal of stood naked in front of him. I drew, lunged, interval away along any six axes and and cut down in one motion — slashed the return either automatically, prepro- wrist, recovered, thrust upward from low grammed, or by some method of signaling line into the belly above the gun belt that we can postulate but not describe. The As my point entered, Jake's saber cut alien craft would not be here-now but will the side of the neck almost to decapitation. be here-later. For pickup."

Our target collapsed like a puppet with cut "In that case, Jake, you and I and the strings, lay by the pool, bleeding from three gals should scram out of here-now to wounds. there-then. Be missing. How long has our "Zebadiah, I'm sorry!" pressure test been running? What time is

"About what, Princess?" I asked as I it?" wiped my blade on the alleged ranger's "Seventeen-seventeen." Deety an-

uniform. I noticedthe color of the blood with swered instantly.

distaste. I looked at my wife, "Naked as a frog.

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ie has helped in an emergency room after a five-car crash; tome, bloodisjustamessto clean up. Even green blood doesn't bother Visual Beauty me that much."

Deety gulped. "I'll help carry. I said I Manipulate Fun would!" "Dejah Thoris!" Intellectual Stimulation "Sir? Yes, my Captain?" "Back away from that. Take this. And this."

I unbuckled sword and belt, shoved down my swimming briefs, handed all of it BERROCAL PUZZLE to Deety, "Jake, help me get him up into SCULPTURES fireman's carry." "I'll help carry, son."

"No, I can tote him easier than two could. Sharpie, where do you want to work?" The unique metal sculptures of Miguel Berrocal ate composed of many individually sculpted ele- "Hilda my dear one, what would you say ments interlocked together in an ingenious manner. Assembled, they are beautiful works of art, to a workbench in the garage with a drop worthy of gracing the collections of major museums and art col lectors. When disassembled, they it and floodlights over it?" become exquisitely intricate mechanical puzzles, challenging enough lo test the ability of the most cloth on dedicated puzzle fan. Clearly, they are more fun to own than the works of any other artist. "I'd say, 'Swell!' Berrocal is recognized as the most important living Spanish sculptor and one ot the true giants of twentieth century art. His signed and numbered, limited edition works boast a history of consis- Zeb appreciation each edition approaches exhaustion. They are one of the most tently skyrocketing as I that 's I felt better after got "ranger" exciting values in art today for collectors, investors, and puzzle addicts. corpse dumped and the garage door Send the coupon below for a free 14 page color brochure presenting 21 Berrocal sculptures in a closed, everyone indoors. I had told Hilda wide range of prices, plus a reprint of Martin Gardener's article on Berrocal in Scientific American, but my that I felt no "immediate" danger, and complete ordering information. Or, if you need more information immediately, call Berrocal's wild talent does not warn me until the mo- longtime associate in the United States, James S. Rudolph, COLLECT: (313) 663-1312. ment of truth. The Blokes in Black Hats had us located, or possibly had never lost us; CENTICORE ARTS, what applies to human gangsters has little INTERNATIONAL to do with aliens whose powers and mo- I tives and plans we had noway of guessing. I 2122 Melrose Ave., Dept. 21 We might be as naive as a kitten who I Ann Arbor, Mf 48104 thinks he is hidden because his head is, I unaware that his little rump sticks out. They were alien, they were powerful, three ' Surely not these." Bible, or somebody, said, 'Know thine they were multiple—three thousand? million? didn't know the Number of the She stuck out her tongue. "Smariy. I enemy.' This is the only Black Hat we've We

it Beast. And they knew where we were. have a clock in my head. I never mention seen, and he's not human and not born on not because people give me funny looks." Earth. There is a wealth of knowledge lying True, we had killed one—by luck, by "ranger" be missed; "Deety does have an innate time sense," here, and it ought not to be shoved down a planning. That would agreed her father, "accurate to thirteen septic tank until we know more about it. we could expect more to call in force. seconds plus or minus about iour seconds; Jacob, feel this," Foolhardiness has never appealed to

I run, I run, don't I've measured it." Hilda's husband got down on his knees, me. Given a chance to her his through the "rang- mean I'll bug out on wing mate when the "I'm sorry, Zebadiah, I don't mean to be let guide hand a freak." er's hair. "Feel those bumps, dearest?" unfriendlies show up, and certainly not on a

"Sorry about what, Princess? I'm im- "Yes!" wife and an unborn child. But I wanted us pressed. What do you do about time "Much like the budding horns of a lamb, ail to run —me, my wife, my blood brother zones?" are they not?" who was also my father-in-law, and his — Sharpie, who was brave, "Same as you do. Add or subtract as "Oh 'And I beheld another beast com- wife, my chum necessary. Darling, everyone has a built-in ing up out of the earth; and he had two practical, smart, and unsqueamish. That of circadian. Mine is merely more nearly horns like a lamb, and he spake as a drag- she would joke in the jaws Moloch was exact than most people's. Like having ab- on'!" not a fault but a source of esprit. axis, ten axis, I rau solute pitch —some do, some don't." I squatted down, felt for horn buds. "Be wanted us to go! "Are you a lightning calculator?" damned! He did come up out of the rotate, translate, whatever—anywhere not "Yes, but computers are so much faster earth —up this slope anyhow —and he infested by gruesomes with green gore. better; I and felt it for dragon. Talked unfriendly, and checked the gauge that I no longer do much. Except one spake as a I've ever heard of talked Gay's inner pressure had not dropped. Too thing. I can sense a glitch— spot a wrong all the dragons fire. Hilda, much to expect Gay to be a spaceship— answer. Then I look for garbage in the pro- mean or belched when you to scavenge and replenish I critter, for equipped gram. If I don't find it, send for a hardware field-strip this keep an eye out not she specialist. Look, sweetheart, discuss my the Number of the Beast." air. But it was pleasant to know that oddities later. Pop, let's dump that thing "I shall! Who's going to help me get this would hold pressure much longer than it to for home if we had I scram down the septic tank and go. I' specimen up to the house? want three would take us volunteers." to—assuming that unfriendlies had not

"Not so fast, Deety," Hilda was still Deety gave a deep sigh. "I volunteer. shot holes in her graceful shell. squatting by the corpse. "Zebbie. Consult Aunt Hilda, must you do this?" The "ranger" was on its back with from chin to crotch, your hunches. Are we in danger?" "Deety, it ought to be done at Johns clothes cut away, open "Well, not this instant." Hopkins, with X ray and proper tools and and spread. Nameless chunks of gizzard were here and there around the cadaver. It "Good, I want to dissect this creature." color holovision. But I'm the best biologist odor. "Aunt Hilda!" for it because I'm the only biologist. Honey gave off a fetid "Take a Miltown, Deety. Gentlemen, the child, you don't have to watch. Aunt Sharp- Hilda was still carving, ice tongs in left hand, knife in her right, greenish goo up

over her wrists. As I approached she put down the Knife, picked up a razor blade.

did not look up until I spoke. "Learning things, Sharpie?" She put down her tools, wiped her hands on a towel, pushed back her hair with her

forearm. "Zebbie. you wouldn't believe it." "Try me," "Well, look at this." She touched the corpse's right leg and spoke to the corpse itself. "What's a nice joint like this doing in a girl like you?"

I saw what she meant: a long, gaunt leg with an extra knee lower than the human

• knee; it bent backwards. Looking higher, I

saw that its arms had similar extra articula- tion. "Did you say girl?"

"I said girl. Zebbie. this monster is either female or hermaphroditic. A fully devel- oped uterus, two-horned like a cat's, an ovary above each horn. But there appear to be testes lower down and a dingus that may be a retractable phallus. Female, but probably male as well. Bisexual, but does not impregnate itself; the plumbing

wouldn't hook up. I think these critters can both pitch and catch." "Taking turns? Or simultaneously?" "Wouldn't that be sump'n? No, for me-

chanical reasons I think they take furns, Whether ten minutes apart or ten years, deponent sayeth not. But I'd give a pretty to

see two of 'em going at it!" "Sharpie, you've got a one-track mind."

"It's the main track. Reproduction is the main track; the methods and mores of

copulation are the central features of all

higher developments of life." "You're ignoring money and television." "Piffle! All human activities, including scientific research, are either mating dances and care of the young or dismal sublimations of born losers in the only game in town. Don't try to kid Sharpie. Took, me forty-two years to grab a real man and

get myself knocked up, but I made it! Ev- erything I've done up to the last two weeks

has been 'vamp till ready.' How about you,

you shameless stud? Am I not right? Care-

ful how you answer; I'll tell Deety."

"I'll take the Fifth."

"Make mine a quart. Zebbie, I bate these monsters; they interfere with my plans: a rose-covered cottage, a baby in the crib, a pot roast in the oven, me in a gingham dress, and my man coming down the lane after a hard day flunking freshmen —me with his slippers and his pipe and a dry martini waiting for him. Heaven! All else is vanity and vexation. Four fully developed mammary glands but lacking the redun- dant fat characteristic of the human fe-

male— 'cept me, damn it. A double stomach, a single intestine. A two-com- partment heart that seems to pump by peristalsis rather than by beating. Cordate.

I haven't examined the brain, but it must be as well developed as ours is. Definitely humanoicf outrageously nonhuman. Don't knock over those bottles; they are speci- mens of body fluids." THE MOST ADVANCEDWATCH "What are these things?" It sounded logical, but I could not forget "Splints to conceal the unhuman articu- Kettering's law; "Logic is an organized way IN THE WORLD lation. Plastic surgery on the face, too, I'm of going wrong with confidence." pretty sure, and cheaters to reshape ihe Deety appeared and set down a loaded INNOCRON QUARTZ skull. The hair is fake; these Boojums don't hamper. "That's the last." She had her hair have hair. Something like tattooing —or up in a bath knot and was dressed solely in CHRONOGRAPH maybe masking I haven't been able to peel rubber gloves. "Hi. dearest. Aunt Hilda, I'm off—to make the face and other exposed ready to help." ALARM skin look human instead of blue-green. "Not much you can do, Deety hon — Zeb, seven to two, a large number of miss- unless you want to relieve Zebbie." ing persons have been used as 'guinea Deety was staring at the corpse and did pigs before these creatures worked out not look happy — her nipples were down

methods for this masquerade. Swoop! A flat. "Go take a bath!" I told her. "Scram."

NEVER BEFORE flying saucer dips down, and two more "Do I stink that badly?" AVAILABLE AT guinea pigs wind up in their laboratories." "You stink swell, honey. But Sharpie THIS ROCK "There hasn't been a Hying saucer scare pointed out that this may be our last chance BOTTOM in years." at soap and water in a while. I've promised

PRICE "Poetic license, dear. If they have her that we won't leave for Canopus and space-time twisters, they can pop up any- points east until she has had her bath. So where, steal what they want, or replace a gei yours out of the way, and then you can real human with a convincing fake, and be help me stow while she gets sanitary."

gone in the time it takes to switch off a light." Hilda

"This one couldn't get by very long. By the time I was out of my bath. Jacob, Rangers have to take physical exami- Deety, and Zebbie had Gay Deceiver

• IT FEELS LIKE A nations." stowed and lists checked: can opener, "This one may be a rush job, prepared cameras, and so on—even samples of just for us. A permanent substitution might fluids and tissues from the cadaver, as fool anything but an X ray, and might even Zebbie's miracle car had a small refriger-

fool an X ray if the doctor giving the exam- ator. Deety wasn't happy about my speci- ination was one of Them— a theory you mens being in ihe refrigerator, but they

might think about. Zebbie, I must get to were very well packed, layer on layer of The Innocron Chronograph Alarm is one of the most work. There is so much to learn and so little plastic wrap, then sealed into a freezer advanced watches available today. And at only 139.95. il is lime. I can't learn a fraction of what this box. Besides, that refrigerator contained an unqoeslicnably excellent value. In tacl, we ate so confi- carcass could tell a real comparative mostly camera film, dynamite caps, and dent of its quality and high performance capability thai we biologist." other noneatables. Food was mostly will guarantee customer sati stadia n— or your money

I "Can I help?" was not anxious to. freeze-dried and sealed in nitrogen, ex- Oack. You can't lose with our thirty-day free trial, so order 1 "Well — cept foods that wouldn't spoil. your Innocfon today] Only $39.95 in silvertooe and $44.95 in elegant goldtone. Included are batteries and the manufac- "I haven't much to do until Jake' and We were dog tired. Jacob moved that we turer's one year warranty. Deety finish assembling the last of whal sleep, then leave. "Zeb, unless you expect

CHECK THESE FEATURES: they are going to take. So what can I do to a new attack in the nexl eight hours, we

help?" should rest. I need to be clearheaded in • ALARM can be set to anytime within a 24 hour period. "I could work twice as fast if you would handling verniers. This house is almost a At the designated time, a pleasant, but effective buaer take pictures. I have to stop to wipe my fortress, will be pitch-black, and does not sounds to remind or awaken youl

hands before I touch ihe camera." radiate any part of the spectrum. They may • CHRONOGRAPH/STOPWATCH that can freeze and "I'm your boy, Sharpie. Just say what conclude that we ran for it right after we got display split/lap limes while stopwatch continues to run. angle, distance, and when." their boy— hermaphrodite. I mean; the fake Can also switch to and from timekeeping and stopwatch

Hilda looked relieved. "Zebbie. have I ranger—what do you think?" modes without affecting either operation.

told you that I love you despite your gorilla "Jake, 1 wouldn't have been surprised • QUARTZ CRYSTAL allows "always visible" digital appearance and idiot grin? Underneath, had we been clobbered at any moment. display— even in the brightest sunlight— with ±15 you have the soul of a cherub. I want a bath Since they didn't —Well, I don't like to han- seconds per month accuracy so badly I can taste it — could be the last dle Gay when I'm not sharp. More mistakes • include month, date and CALENDAR FUNCTIONS hot bath in a long time. And the bidet—the are made in battle because of fatigue than acme of civilized decadence. I've been any other cause. Let's sack in. Anybody Why Shop By Mail? afraid I would still be carving strange meat need a sleeping pill?" Shopping fiy mm ! s _onv£nis"i- it when Jacob said was time to leave." "All I need is a bed. Hilda my love, to- iders v,_v-ic:iy ;; yc-L,r honi3 or H-i/i.-iWE tour

r "Carve away, dear; I order to any maior cred:l card. tel c : naicuc:: 3 E you'll get your bath." night sleep on my own side."

5"- il i erioi.-nh not available al your local stor And :h 1 I picked up the camera, the one Jake used 1 shrugged. "You men have to pilot;

for record keeping: a Polaroid Stereo- Deety and I are cargo. We can nap in the

Instamatic —self-foe using, automatic iris- backseats. If we miss a few universes, what

ing. automatic processing —the perfect of it? If you've seen one universe, you've camera for the engineer or scientist who seen 'em all. Deety?" TOLL FHEE CREDIT CARD BUYERS: TO ORDER CALL needs a running record. "If it were up to me, I would lam out of Z4 HOURS A DAY I took endless pictures while Hilda here so fast my shoes would be left stand- To order in California call loll free (800) 432-7431 sweated away. "Sharpie, doesn't it worry ing. But Zebadiah has to pilot, and Pop has (800) 854-3831 you to work with bare hands? You might to set verniers, and both are tired and don't catch the Never-Get-Overs." want to chance it. So, Zebadiah, don't fret if !,»,:: "Zebbie, if these critters could be killed I rest with my eyes and ears open." by our bugs, they would have arrived here "Huh? Deety, why?"

and died quickly. They didn't. Therefore it "Somebody ought to be on watch. It =;iii : ;v j'- seems likely that, we can't be hurt by their might give us that split-second advan- .r-5 ©DWS maikomg imema ii si bugs. Radically different biochemistries." tage — split seconds have saved us at least " " twice. Don't worry, darling. I often skip a "New program running, Zeb." "Zeb, whatever happened in Sumatra ap- night to work a long program under shared "You're a smart girl. Gay." parently happened about a month ago. time. Doesn't hurt me; a nap the next day, "Isn't it time you married me?" Emotionally I feel turmoil. great Logically I and I'm ready to bite rattlesnakes. Tell him. night. "Good Gay." am forced to state that I cannot see that our Pop." — "Running news retrieval. Boss." situation has changed." "That's correct, Zeb, but "Report!" "Hilda? Deety?" Zebbie cut him off. "Maybe you gals can "Straits Times, Singapore (Reuters). "News retrieval report." announced Gay. split watches and have breakfast ready. Tragic News of Marston Expedition. In- "Report!" Right now I've got to hook up Gay Deceiver donesian News Service, Palembang. Two "San Francisco (AP). Via satellite from so that she can reach me in our bedroom. bodies identified as Dr. Cecil Yang and Dr. Saipan, Marianas. TWA hypersonic-

Deety, I can add a program so that she can Z. Edward Carter were brought by jungle semiballistic liner Winged Victory out of listen around the cabin, too. Properly pro- buggy to National Militia Headquarters. San Francisco International al twenty grammed, Gay's the best watchdog of any Telukbetung. The district commandant o'clock this evening Pacific Coast Time of us. Will that satisfy you duty-struck little stated that they will be transferred by air to was seen by eye and radar to implode on broads?" Palembang for further transport to Singa- reentry. Honolulu (AP). U.S. Navy official.

Deety said nothing; so I kept quiet. Zeb- pore when the commandant in chief re- USS submersible carrier Flying Fish bie, frowning, turned back to his car, leases them to the minister for Tourism and operating near Wake Island has been or- opened a door, and prepared to hook Culture. The whereabouts of Professor dered to proceed flank speed toward site Gay's voice and ears to the three house Marston and Mr. Smythe-Belisha are still of Winged Victory reentry. She will surface intercoms. "Want to shift the basement unknown. Commandants of both districts and launch search craft at optimum point. talky-talk to your bedroom, Jake?" concede that hopes of finding them aiive Navy PIO spokesman, when asked what "Good idea," Jacob agreed. have diminished. However, a spokesman was optimum, replied. 'No comment' As-

"Wait a half while I ask Gay what she has. for the minister of Tourism and Culture as- sociated Press's military editor noted that Hello, Gay." sured a press conference that the Indone- submerged speed of Flying Fish class and "Howdy, Zeb. Wipe your chin." sian government would pursue the search type and characteristics of craft carried "Program, Gay. Add running news re- more assiduously than ever." are classified information. TWA spokes- trieval. Area: Arizona strip north of Grand Zebbie whistled tunelessly. Finally, he men released passenger list by order of Ihe Canyon plus Utah. Persons: all persons said, "Opinions, anyone?" Civil Aerospace— Board. List follows: Cali- listed in current running news-retrieval "He was a brilliant man, son," my hus- fornia programs plus rangers, federal rangers, said soberiy. irreplaceable band "An loss. The list was long. I did not recognize any forest rangers, park rangers, state rangers. Tragic." names until Gay reached "Doctor Neil 0. End of added program." "Ed was a good Joe, Jake. But that's not Brain—"

"New program running. I Boss." what mean. Our tactical situation, Now. I gasped. But no one said a word until "Program. Add running acoustic report, Here." Gay announced, "End running news re- maximum gain." My husband paused before answering. trieval." CANYOU OUTSMART OUR COMPUTER? Don't be too sure. The computer built into Parker Brothers game Code Name: Sector 1* is capable of making thousands of calculations per second. It's as powerful as early computers that filled entire rooms and sold for millions dollars. And, while it gives you clues to track down and sink a hidden electronic submarine, also helps the sub escape and counter-attack. That's the catch that makes every game a real challenge. Whether you're playing alone or against others, your toughest opponent is the computer. Code Name: Sector™, the electronic board game from Parker Brothers. It's a game with a mind of its own BROTHERS "Thank you, Gay." micks and gadgets and bells and whistles. "A pleasure, Zeb." You gave them an impossible schedule." "Winged Victory was booby-trapped.

Zebbie said, "Professor?" "On purpose, dear. Let's see how much And dear Doctor Brain, who isn't the fool I "You're in command, Captain!" food we can stow." thought he was, was not aboard. Those

"Very well, sir! All of you — lifeboat rules! I Gay's cold chest is set flush in the deck poor people were killed so that he could expect fast action and no back talk. Esti- of the driver's compartment. Zebbie told disappear." mated departure, five minutes! First, every- Gay to open up, then, with his shoulders "Go to the head of the class. Sharpie. body take a pee! Second, put on the sideways, reached down and unlocked it. Too many coincidences. And they—the stuff." in Black Hats—know where we clothes you'll travel in. Jake, switch oif , lock "Hand me Blokes up—whatever you do to secure your house I tapped his butt. "Out of there, you over- are." for long absence. Deety, follow Jake, make grown midget, and let Sharpie pack. I'll let "Meaning that Professor IM. 0. Brain, in- sure he hasn't missed anything; then you, you know when it's tight as a girdle." stead of being dead in the Pacific, might not Jake, switch out lights and close doors. Space that makes Zebbie twist and grunt show up any second."

Hilda, bundle what's left of that Dutch lunch is roomy for me. He passed things in. I fitted "He and a gang of green-blooded aliens and fetch it— fast, not fussy. Check the re- them for maximum stowage. The third item who don't like geometers." frigerator for solid foods —no liquids — and he handed me was the leavings of our buf- "Zebbie. what do you figure their plans cram what you can into Gay's refrigerator. fet dinner. "That's our picnic lunch," I told are?"

Don't dither over choices. Questions, any- him, putting it on his seat. "Can't guess. They might fumigate this one? Move!" "Can't leave it loose in the cabin." planet and take it. Or conquer us as cattle

By using my cape as a Santa Claus "Cap'n, we'll eat it before it can spoil. I or as slaves. The only data we have are that

it if I it they are alien, that are powerful, pack, I carried food into the garage and put will be strapped down. Is okay clutch they and kill- it down by Gay—and was delighted to find to my bosom?" that they have no compunction about

I I ing have no about that I was the first there. "Sharpie, have ever won an argument us. So compunction

Zebbie strode in behind me, dressed in a with you?" killing them. To my regret, I don't know how. coverall with thigh pockets, a pilot suit. He "Only by brute force, dear. Can the chat- So I'm running — running scared —and tak- looked at the pile on my cape. "Where's the ter and pass the chow." ing the three I'm certain are in danger with elephant. Sharpie?" With the help of God and a shoehorn it all me."

"Will to find kill "Cap'n Zebbie, you didn't say how went in. I was in a backseat with our lunch we ever be able them and much, you just said what. What won't go in my lap and my cape under me before our them''" didn't answer Deety she can have." I hooked a thumb at the spouses showed up. "Cap'n Zebbie, why Zebbie because chopped-up corpse. did the news of Brainy's death cause your and my Jacob arrived, breathless. Father "Sorry, Hilda; you are correct." Zebbie change of mind?" and daughter were in jump suits. Deety glanced at his wristwatch, the multiple-dial "Do you disapprove, Sharpie?" looked chesty and cute; my darling looked sort they call a navigator's watch. "On the contrary, Skipper. Do you want trim—but worried. "We're late. Sorry!" "Cap'n, this house has loads of gim- my guess?" "You're not late," Zeb told them. "But into your seats on the bounce." Checkoffs completed, Gay switched off lights, opened the garage door, and backed out onto the landing flat. "Copilot, can you read your verniers?"

"Captain, I had better loosen my chest belt."

"Do so if you wish. But your seat adjusts

forward twenty centimeters — here, I'll get it," Zeb reached down, did something be- tween their seats. "Say when."

"There, that's about right. I can read 'em and reach 'em, with chest strap in place. Orders, sir?" "Where was your car when you and Deety went to the space-time that lacked the letter J?" "About where we are now." "Can you send us there?"

"I think so. Minimum translation, posi- tive—entropy, increasing — along tau axis." "Please move us there, sir." My husband touched the controls.

"That's it, Captain."

I couldn't see any change. Our house

was still a silhouette against the sky, with the garage a black maw in front of us. The stars hadn't even flickered. Zebbie said, "Let's check, "-and switched on Gay's roading lights, brightly lighting our garage. Empty and looked normal'. Zebbie said, "Hey! Look at that\"

"Lookatwriaf?" I demanded, and tried to see around Jacob. "At nothing, rather. Sharpie, Where's —

your alien?"

Then I understood. No corpse. No OJEXT Drmrui green-blood mess. Workbench against the wall and floodlights not rigged. Zebbie said, "Gay Deceiver, take us home!" Instantly the same scene, but with carved-up corpse.J gulped.

Zebbie switched out the lights. I felt bet- ter, but not much. "Captain?" "Copilot."

"Wouldn't it have been well to have

checked for that letter J? It would have given me a check on calibration." "I did check, Jake. You have bins on the back of your garage neatly stenciled. The one at left center reads Junk Metal." "Oh!" "Yes, and your analog in that space — your twin, Jake-prime, or what you will has your neat habits. The left-corner bin

read lunk Metal, spelled with an /. A cup- board above and to the right contained

lugs & lars. So I told Gay to take us home. I was afraid they might catch us. Embarrass- ing."

Deety said, "Zebadiah — I mean Captain —embarrassing how. sir? Oh, that missing letter in the alphabet scared me,

but it no longer does. Now I'm nervous about aliens. Black Hats." "Deety, you were lucky that first time. Because Deety-prime was not at home. But she may be, tonight. Possibly in bed with her husband, named Zebadiah-prime. Un- stable cuss. Likely to shoot at a strange car SCIENCE RENAISSANCE IN EUROPE-After many false starts and disappoint- shining lights into his father-in-law's get-* ing efforts, to recover its pre-World War II scientific glory, Europe is suddenly astir rage. A violent character." with ambitious, well-financed, high-quality research. France., Germany, and Great "You're teasing me."

Britain have pooled a formidable assemblage of intellectual power and physical "No, Princess; it did worry me. A parallel resources to build a space program, create high-energy atom smashers, and space, with so small a difference as the pioneer new medical techniques. "Twenty years ago the United States was doing lack of one unnecessary letter, but with eighty percent of the world's science," says Pierre Aigrain, France's equivalent of house and grounds you mistook for your the White House science adviser. "Now Europe is catching up, and the U.S. share of own, seems to imply a father and daughter the total has been going down." Science-watcher Daniel S. Greenberg went to the named lacob and Deiah Thoris." Captain Continent's major science centers and brought back the inside story on why Europe Zebbie pronounced the names Yacob and is making the grade in Big Science. Read it exclusively in the December Omni. Deyah Thoris. "Zebadiah, that scares me almost as HUMAN EXPERIMENTATION— Somebody always has to be the guinea pig before much as aliens." medical science can move forward. But while human experimentation remains as "Aliens scare me far more. Hello, Gay." fixed an element of research as theories and test tubes, the very words make the "Howdy, Zeb. Your nose is runny." skin crawl, conjuring up visions of Nazi doctor horrors and brutal exploitation of "Smart Girl, one gee vertically to one prisoners,' poor people, and hospital patients. In the December Omni Dava Sobel klick. Hover." explores the ethical and moral dilemmas raised by human-subject research, faking "Roger dodger, you old codger." a look at how new safeguard regulations will affect the course of future discovery We rested on our backs and headrests for a few moments, then, with a stomach- in PRIZES! PRIZES! PRIZES! — What's the greatest untapped resource science? surging swoosh of a fast lift, we leveled off The desire. to win a prize, says Omni senior editor Scot Morris. Lindbergh's flight and hovered. Zebbie said, "Deety, can the across the Atlantic, man-powered flight across the English Channel, a clock that autopilot accept a change in that homing works on board ship, a bicycle that can go over 55 mph, the smallest motor ever program by voice? Or does it take an offset built, the breeding of a white marigold — all were achievements inspired by the in the verniers?" offering o! a prize. Next month Morris examines prizes past and calls for a "What do you want to do?" reinstatement of the prize as an exciting and economic incentive to stimulate "Same ell-and-ell two klicks above new scientific achievement — while offering some prizeworthy notions of his own. ground."

"I think so. Shall I? Or do you want to do it, INTERVIEW/RENE DUBOS— Meet one of the world's most accomplished Captain?" biologists in this exclusive, interview. Dubos, a famed researcher and teacher at "You try it, Deety." Rockefeller University, discovered the first useful antibiotic, helped develop the first "Yes, sir. Hello, Gay." tuberculosis vaccine; and won a Pulitzer Prize for his 1968 book, So Human an "Hi, Deety!" Animal. Today he says that science and society have become too complex for "Program check. Define Home." people to cope with; read his prescription for reorganization in our next issue. "Home. Cancel any-all inertials transi- 120 QMMI "

permanent pro- tions translations rotations. Return to pre- "I may have given insufficient thought to "Execule-code new Deceiver, countermarch! At programmed zero latitude, longitude, a trivial root in equation ninety-seven. But it gram, Gay repeat reversed in real ground level," is analogous to what we were considering new execute-code, "Report present location." doing with planets.. A five-dimensional time latest sequence inertials transitions rotations before last use of "One klick vertically above Home." transform simplified to three." translations Can't program execute-code Gay Deceiver take "Gay. Program revision." I said. "Excuse me, gentlemen. we "Waiting, Deety." move somewhere away from right over our us home." permanent-program accepted." "Home program, Cancel Ground level. cabin? I'm jumpy. Black Hats are hunting "New

I times." Substitute, Two klicks above ground level, us." "Gay, tell you three

I three times." hovering." "You're right, Sharpie; I'm about to move "Deety, hear you "Program revision recorded." us. All secure?" "Gay Deceiver, countermarch!" over the Grand Can- "Gay Deceiver, take us home!" "Captain Zebadiah!" Instantly we were for the I Zeb reach Instantly, with no feeling of motion, we "Trouble, Princess?" yon, cruising south. saw It manual controls. "Deety, that was slick." were much higher. "May I attempt a novel program? may

1 Gay, Zeb said, "Two klicks on the nose! Deety save time." "I didn't save time, sir, goofed. you're asmartgirll" "Programming isyourpidgin. Certainly." you're a smart girl," all the "Hello, Gay." "Deety, don't make me blush." "Zebadiah, I bet you tell that to both girls," said Captain girls." "Hi, Deety!" "You're smart had us on radar, he "No, just to some. Gay. you're a smart "Retrieve last program. Report execute Zebbie. "If anyone getting cataracts. Vice gin." code." must think he's here, he's "Then why are you shacked up with that "Reporting, Deety. 'Gay Deceiver, take versa, if anyone picked us up up, Smart strawberry blonde with the fat knockers?" us home!' wondering how we popped Deceiver so Zebbie craned his neck and looked at "Negative. Erase permanent program dodge, dear. You've got Gay home on us. me. "Sharpie, that's your voice." controlled by execute-code Gay Deceiver deceptive that nobody can dignity. drove take us home. Report confirm." We'll be elsewhere. Jake, are your profes- I ignored him with Zebbie aboard? Both theoretical south to the Grand Canyon, eerie in star- "Confirmatiion report. Permanent pro- sional papers drawings?" light. Without slowing, he said, "Gay De- gram execute- coded Gay Deceiver take us and Captain. bulky. Mi- ceiver, take us home!"— and again we home negati le erase. I tell you three "Why, no, Zeb— Too Originals are in the were hovering over our cabin. No jar, no times." crofilms 1 brought. shock, no nothing. "Deety," sa: d Zeb, "a neg scrub to Gee basement vault. Have I erred?" tells to item in perms three "Not a bit! Is there any geometer who Zebbie said, "Jake, once I figure the an- her place published paper on this six-way gles, I'm going to quit spending money on places. Redundancy safety factor." gave yqur friendly reception?" dear! I sling syslenra juice. How does she do it when we haven't "Don't bother me, She and more than a hand- been anywhere?—no rotation, no transla- the same lingo. Hello, Gay." "Captain, there aren't "Hello, Deety!" ful of geometers capable of judging my postulate system without long and inten-

sive study. It's too unorthodox. Your late

cousin was one— a truly brilliant mind! Uh, I now suspect that Doctor Brain understood

it and sabotaged it for his own purposes." "Jake, is there anyone friendly to you and able to understand the stuff in your vault? I'm trying to figure out how to warn our fellow humans. A fantastic story of ap- parently unrelated incidents is not enough. Not even with the corpse of an extraterres-

trial to back it up. You should leave mathe- matical theory and engineering drawings to someone able to understand them and whom you trust. We can't handle it; every time we stick our heads up, somebody takes a shot at us. And we have no way to fight back. It's a job that may require our whole race. Well? Is there a man you can trust as your professional executor?" "Well, one, perhaps. Not my field of geometry, but brilliant. He did write me a

most encouraging letter when I published my first paper— the paper that was so. sneered at by almost everyone except your cousin and this one other. Professor Seppo Raikannonen, of Turku. Finland." "Are you certain he's not an alien?" "What? He's been on the faculty at Turku for years! Over fifteen."

I said, "Jacob, that is about how long Professor Brain was around," "But—" My husband looked around at me and suddenly smiled. "Hilda, my love, have you ever taken a sauna?" "Once."

"Then tell our captain why I am sure that " ' .

my friend Seppois not an alien in disguise. to phone, but the ground did not seem

I professional healthy. if all of presumed — Deety and I — attended a Even us were meeting in Helsinki last year. After the dead, nullifying our comcredit cards so meeting, we visited their summer place in quickly seemed unfriendly; all of us had the Lake Country and took a sauna with high credit ratings. them." Canceling Sharpie's comcredit without "Papa, Mama, and three kids," agreed proof of death was more than unfriendly; it Deety. "Unmistakably human." was outrageous, since she used the pre-

"Brainy was a bachelor," I added deposit method,

thoughtfully. "Cap'n Zebbie, wouldn't dis- I was forced to the decision that it was my

guised aliens have to be bachelors?" duty to make a military report; I radioed "Or single women. Or pseudo-married NORAD, stated name, rank, reserve- couples. No kids, the masquerade commission serial number, and asked for wouldn't hold up. Jake, let's try to phone scramble for a crash priority report—and your friend. Mmrn, nearly breakfast time in ran into "correct" procedure, which causes Finland, or we may wake him. That's better instant ulcers. What was my clearance?

than missing him." What led me to think that I had crash-

"Good! My comcredit number is Nero priority intelligence? By what authority did I Aleph— demand a scramble code? Do you know "Let's try mine. Yours might trigger how many screwball calls come in here for I Get off this frequency; it's onnr something if Black Hats are as smart as every day? think they are. Smart Girl." official traffic only. One more word out of the civil patrol to "Yes, Boss." you, and I shall alert sky "Don Ameche." pick you up.

I off. "To hear is to obey, Mighty One." I said one more word after chopped "Deety, you've been giving Gay bad Deety and her father ignored it; Hilda said, habits." "My sentiments exactly!" Bar- Shortly a flat male voice answered, "The 1 tried the Federal Rangers' Kaibab communications credit number you have racks at Jacob Lake, then the office at cited is not a valid number. Please refer to Littlefield, and back to Kaibab. Liitlefield your card and try again. This is a record- didn't answer; Jacob Lake answered: "This ing." is a recording. Routine messages may be Zebbie made a highly unlikely sugges- recorded during beep tone. Emergency tion. "Gay can't send out my comcredit reports should be transmitted to Flagstaff

. . . . code incorrectly; she has it tell-me-three- HQ. Stand by for beep tone . Beep! ."

. . times. The glitch is in their system. Pop, we Beep! . . , Beep! tell have to use yours." I was about to Gay to zip my tape Zebbie. comcredit the whole world was lighted by the 1 said, "Try mine, My when

is good; I predeposit." brightest light imaginable. A female voice this time; "—not a valid Luckily we were cruising south with that

number. Puh-lease refer to your card and light behind us. I goosed Gay to flank try again. This is a recording." speed while telling her to tuck in her wings. Then my husband got a second female Not one of my partners asked a foolish

voice: "—try again, This is a recording." question, although I suspect that none had cloud. Deety said, "I don't have one. Pop and I ever seen a fireball or a mushroom use the same number." "Smart girl." "It doesn't matter," Cap'n Zebbie said "Here. Boss." bitterly. "These aren't glitches. We've been "DR problem. Record true bearing light scrubbed. Unpersons. We're all dead." beacon relative bearing astern, Record bearing beacon. I that radar same I didn't argue. had suspected we range and were dead since the morning two weeks Solve latitude/longitude beacon. Compare solution fixes in Confirm." earlier when I woke up in bed with my with perms. cuddly new husband. But how long had we "Program confirmed."

i been dead? Since my party? Or more re- "Execute." cently? "Roger Wilco, Zeb. Heard any new ones ot lately?" at "Solution. True I didn't care. This was a better grade She added once, heaven than Sunday school in Terre Haute bearing identical with fix execute-coded

had taught me to expect. While 1 don't think Gay Deceiver take us home. True range

I've been outstandingly wicked, I haven't identical plus-minus zero point six klicks." been very good either. Of the Ten Com- "You're a smart girl, Gay." mandments I've broken six and bent some "Flattery will get you anywhere, Zeb. others, But Moses apparently had not had Over." the Last Word from on High, Being dead "Roger and out. Hang onto your hats,

I was weird and wonderful, and I was enjoy- folks; we're going straight up." had out- ing every minute ... or eon, as the case raced the Shockwave, but we were close to might be. the Mexican border; either side might send sprint birds homing on us. "Copilot!" Zeb "Captain." Not being able to phone from my car was "Move us! Out of this space!" my most frustrating experience since a "Where, Captain?" Fast!" night I spent in jail through a mistake — "Anywherel

acceleration? I made the mistake. I considered grounding "Uh, can you ease the — U

can't lift my arms."

Cursing myself, I cut power, let Gay De- THE ceiver climb free. Those vernier controls should have been mounted on armrests. Designs that look perfect on the drawing

board can kill test pilots. "Translation complete, Captain." CAYMANS

"Roger, Copilot. Thank you." I glanced at the board: six-plus klicks height-above- ground and rising— thin but enough air to bite, "Hang onto our lunch, Sharpie!" I leaned us backwards while doing an Irn- melman into level flight, course north,

power still off. I told Gay to stretch the glide, then tell me when we had dropped to three

. klicks H-above-G. What should have been Phoenix was off to the right; another city — Flagstaff?— was to diving what Aspen is to skiing. To the dh farther away, north and a bit to the east; we ts the highest pinnacle of pleasure, n appeared to be headed home. There was and no glowing cloud on the horizon. "Jake, where are we?" ice. Its magic lies in the incredible number "Captain, I've never been in this uni- ns. Whatever the visitors level of experienci verse, We translated ten quanta positive rami1 hing to offer. The ideal playground for tau axis. So we should be in analogous space close to ours—ten minimum inter- climbers, fish watchers and underwater photograph vals or quanta." That's what Skin Diver Magazine, tl " "This looks like Arizona," in its field, says about the Caymans. 'Approaching three klicks, Boss." And that about says it all. "Thanks, Gay. Hold course and One hour's flight from Miami on Cayman Airway H-above-G. Correction! Hold course and ationsi absolute altitude. Confirm and execute." "Roger Wilco, Zeb."

I had forgotten that the Grand Canyon lay ahead— or should. Smart Girl is smart, but she's literal-minded. She would have held height-above-ground precisely and given us the wildest roller-coaster ride in history. She is very flexible, but with her the "garbage-in/garbage-out" law applies.

She had many extra fail-safes— because / make mistakes. Gay can't; anything she does wrong is my mistake. Since I've been

making mistakes all my life, I surrounded

her with all the safeguards I could think of. But she had no program against wild rides—she was beefed up to accept them. Violent evasive tactics had saved our lives two weeks ago. and tonight as well. Being too close to a fireball can worry a man—to death. "Gay, display map, please." The map showed Arizona our Arizona; Gay does not have in her gizzards any

strange universes. I changed course to The MINOX LX. cause us to pass over our cabin site— its Its complete system is smaller than analog for this space-time. Didn't dare tell her, "Gay, take us home!" for reasons left as many cameras are alone. an exercise for the class. "Deety, how long And now much more elegant. ago did that bomb go off?" "Six minutes twenty-three seconds. LX is ccbous W thick and forty yeai b perfecting super-compact «nt 3Ki ounces. With ils Zebadiah, that really was an A-bomb?" : $h. it's nol much blgg/ v v-;-i "Pony bomb, perhaps. Maybe two kilo- i- matches or outperforms ccr.i-ircii - MINOX 3 A.. RocHleigh, N.J. 07647 tons. Gay Deceiver." many time: : : .:: .;..:, n >in ' Bxposure control. -.lr,-~-;i\ji 'o eight 1 Send me nformation about IheMinoxLX "I'm all ears, Zeb." 1 mlnl-syste Inches, incredible den-h o! :iela and

"Report time interval since 1 radar-ranging :. .::. H ' . ": ',;! I fl DSW, beacon." a nl- "Five minutes forty-four seconds, Zeb." let is available when you purchase :he

i '' LX rmrii-syste :...; r . r lit Deety gasped. "Was I that far off?" ;'',:: . „,.,'.!;...:. "No. darling. You reported time since 3" 4'';" ,; able X x i case From Minox. of L : tlash. I didn't ask Gay to range until after we W. Germany, the people who've *p-:r,\ were hypersonic." — .

"Oh. I feel better" per.

"Deety. how long has it been since we "Zat Marsh?" killed that fake ranger?" "Don't talk with your mouth full, Sharpie."

"That was seventeen fourteen. It Is now "Zebbie, you brute. I said, Is that Mars? twenty-two twenty. Five hours six minutes." Over there,"

' "Check. Jake, I didn't know that Gay "That's Antares. Mars is— Look ieit about could range an atomic blast. Light beacon thirty degrees. See it? Same color as An- to her means a visible light just as radar tares, but brighter" beacon means a navigational radar bea- "Got it. Jacob darling, let's take that va- con. I told her to get a bearing on the light cation on Barsoomi" beacon directly ait; she selected the "Hilda dearest, Mars is uninhabitable.

brightest light with that bearing. Then I told The Mars Expedition used pressure suits. her to take radar range and bearing on it We have no pressure suits." and spun my prayer wheel and prayed. I added, "Even if we did, they would get in "There was 'white noise' possibly blan- the way of a honeymoon." keting her radar frequency But her own Hilda answered, "I read a jingle about A radar bursts are tagged; it would take a Space Suit Built for Two.' Anyhow, let's go to very high noise level at the same irequency Barsoom! Jacob, you did tell me we could to keep her from recognizing echoes with go anywhere in Zip— nothing flat." her signature. Clearly she had trouble, for "Quite true." she reported 'plus-minus' of six hundred "So let's go to Barsoom."

meters. Nevertheless, range and bearing I decided Jo flank her. "Hilda, we can't go matched a fix in her permanents and told to Barsoom. Mors Kajak and John Carter us our cabin had been bombed. Bad news. don't have their swords." But the aliens got there too late to bomb us. "Want to bet?" Deety said sweetly. Good news." "Huh?"

"Captain, I decline to grieve over material "Sir, you left it to me to pick baggage ior loss, We are alive." thai unassigned space. If you'll check that

"I agree, although I'll remember Snug long, narrow stowage under the instrument Harbor as the happiest home I've ever had. board, you'll find the sword and saber, with But there is no point in trying to warn belts. With socks and underwear crammed Earth our Earth — about aliens. That blast in to keep them from rattling." clincher; destroyed the that alien's cadaver. I said soberly, "My Princess, I couldn't And papers and drawings you were going moan about my sword when your father to turn over to your Finnish friend. I'm not took the loss of his house so calmly -but sure we can go home again." thank you, with all my heart." "Oh, that's no problem, Captain. Two "Let me add my thanks, Deety. I set much seconds to set the verniers. Not to mention store by that old saber unnecessary as it the deadman switch and the program in is."

Gay's permanents." "Father, it was quife necessary this after-

"Jake, I didn't mean that you can't pilot noon." us home; I mean we should not risk it. We've "Hi ho\ Hi ho\ It's to Barsoom we go!" losl our last lead oh the aliens. But they "Captain, we could use the hours till know who we are and have shown dismay- dawn for a quick jaunt to Mars. Uh — Oh, skill ing in tracking us down. I'd like lo live to dear, I have to know its present distance. I see two babies born and grow up." don't." "Wildness re-urns" (Harlan tllison). as the Transcendental 'Amen!" said Sharpie. "This might be the "No problem," I said. "Gay gobbles the Scientists— militant male place for it. Out of a million billion zillion Aerospace Almanac each year." chauvinists -battle the equally Earths, this one may be vermin-lree. Highly "Indeed! I'm impressed." militant Femocrats in Norman likely." "Gay Deceiver."

Spinrad'sfirstfull-lengthscience ! "Hilda dear, there my are no data on "You again? I was thinking." fiction novel in seven years. which to base any assumption." "So think about this. Calculation pro- "Anoblevision of mankind. "Jacob, there is one datum." gram. Data address. Aerospace Almanac. powerful," —Library Journal.

"Eh? What did \ miss, dear?" calculation, line-of-sight Running distance "A natural Hugo winner." "That we do know that our native planet is to planet Mars. Report current answers on — Larry IMiven. infested. So I don't want to raise kids on it. If demand. Execute." "Lots of fun to read." this isn't the place we're looking for, let's "Program running." — Publisher's Weekly. keep looking." "Report." "Serious and significant "Mmm, logical. Yes. Cap—Zeb?" "KliGks two-two-four-zero-nine-zero- "Recommendation?" eight-two-seven point plus-minus nine- Write for free information about the most exciting "Sir, I suggest maximum altitude. Dis- eight-zero." cuss what to do while we get there," "Display running report." Science Fiction in the universe: "Gay Deceiver." Gay did so, "You're a smart giri, Gay." Pocket Books, Dept OM, 1230 I Avenue of the Americas, "On deck, Captain Ahab." "I can do card tricks, too. Program con- "One gee, vertical." tinuing." New York, N.Y. 10020. 'Aye aye, sir." How many answers had "Jake, how do we do this?" Name . Deety taped? 'Align L axis with your gun sight. Isn't that "Anybody want a sandwich?" asked

"I Sharpie. dp. I'm a pregnant woman." "By far!" I aimed at Mars as if to shoot her

I suddenly realized that I had had noth- out of the sky —then got cold feet. "Jake? A ing but a piece of pie since noon. As we little Tennessee windage? I think those fig- — — POCKET 7"BOOKS— — — climbed, we finished what was left of sup- ures are from center-of-gravity to center- 126 OMNI of-gravity. Half a mil would place us a safe distance away. Over a hundred thousand Wicks'." "A hundred and twelve thousand," Jake agreed, watching the display 66

I offset one half mil. "Copilot." Keeping People Warm "Captain." "Transit when ready. Execute." Mars in half-phase, big and round and and Comfortable Has ruddy and beautiful, was swimming off c starboard side. Been Our Specialty for Deety Aunt Hilda said softly, "Barsoom, Dead n sea bottoms. Green giants." I just gulped. Over 59Years. "Mars. Hilda darling," Pop gently cor- rected her. "Barsoom is a myth." "Barsoom," she repeated firmly. "It's not a myth; it's (here. Who says its name is Mars? A bunch of long-dead Romans. Aren't the natives entitled to name it? Barsoom." "My dearest, there are no natives. are assigned Names by an international Sand me my FHEE 120-page, lull-color Christmas Catalog of committee sponsored by Harvard CJbser- quality outdoor apparel and equipment vatory. They confirmed the traditional name." "Pooh! They don't have any more right to

name it than I have. Deety, isn't that right?"

I think Aunt Hilda had the best argument,

but I don't argue with Pop unless it's neces- sary; he gets emotional. Pop and Zebadiah got busy again. Pres- $&**' ently Pop said, "Over twenty-four kilome- ters per second! Captain, at that rate we'll r;Seattle,WA 98134 be there in a little over an hour." "Except that we'll scram before that. But, ladies, you'll get your closer look. Dead sea

bottoms and green giants. If any." "Zebadiah, twenty-four kilometers per second is Mars's orbital speed."

My father answered, "Eh? Why, so it is!" He looked very puzzled, then said, "Cap-

tain, I confess to a foolish mistake."

"Not one that will keep us from getting

home, I hope."

"No, sir. I'm still learning what our con- tinua craft can do. Captain, we did not airr for Mars." IT "I know. I was chicken." WEATHER OUT PACK IT IN.

"No, sir, you were properly cautious. We The OMNI Umbrella is 25" in diameter {unisex size). It's made of'

for specific s Ivt --coated nylon, ->'-, aimed a point in empty space . with mete, trams end black o.astic bardie. Ovioi $Vj We transited to that point but nor with ($2,50 p&h). The Duffle Mars's proper motion. With that of the solar OMNI Bag is made of vinyl backed silver-coated nylon with black

carrying I - web | ;: It system, yes. With Earth's motions sub- | e! sf--ip. hac three outside pockets. OM02$35.0Q($2.50p& h). tracted; that is in the program. But we are a Send to: OMNI PRODUCTS. P.O. Box 6500, Englewood, N.J, 07631. Send short distance ahead of Mars in its orbit; so checker money order in U.S. dollars c- charge to AE, MC or VISA. Toexpedit- it is rushing toward us." your charge order cal, 800-326-^797 (except N.J, ). Allow 4-6 weeks for delivery. "Does that mean we can never land on N.J. '-esidents add 5% tax. any planet but Earth?"

"Not at all. Any vector can be Included in the program—either before or after transi- tion, translation, or rotation. Any sub- sequent change in motion is taken into ac- inertial count by the integrator, But I arp learning that we still have things to learn." Check or money oroe r enclosed "Jake, that is true even of a bicycle. Quit Bank Americard (VISA) American Express Master Ch worrying and enjoy the ride. Brother what a Account view!" #

"Jake, that doesn't look like the photo- i i m i i i rrr graphs the Mars Expedition brought back." -lnterhank#l I (Master Charge On',) "Of course not," said Aunt Hilda. "I said it was Barsoom." — " "

shut. Dr. approximations are correct, at the height at I kept my mouth Ever since Sagan's photographs, anyone who reads which we will get our first radar range, we (he National Geographic — or anything — will be only a bit over half a minute from

knows- what Mars looks like. But when it crashing. Check?" of data, Captain." involves changing male minds, it is -better "To the accuracy our

to let men reach their own decisions; they "Too close. I don't tancy arriving like a become somewhat less pig-headed. That meteor. Is it time to hit the panic button? planet rushing toward us was not the Mars Advise, please. But bear in mind that thai of our native sky. White clouds at the caps, puts us should pufus—two klicks over a big green areas that had to be forest or hot, new crater possibly in the middle of a crops, one deep-blue area that almost cer- radioactive cloud. Have any of you got any 9 " TELEPATHIC tainly was water— all this against ruddy good ideas COMMUNICATION shades that dominated much of the entire "Captain, we can do that just before planet. crashing —and It will either work or not. If it What was lacking were the rugged works, that radioactive cloud will have had— INTUITIVE mountains and craters and canyons of more time to blow away If it doesn't work INSIGHT "our" planet Mars. There were moun- "We'll hit so hard we'll hardly notice it. tains— but nothing like the Devil's Junkyard Gay Deceiver isn't built to reenter at known to science. twenty-four klicks per second. She's

she's still Ford, not I heard Zebadiah say, "Copilot, are you beefed up— but a a certain you took us to Mars?" reentry vehicle."

I try "Captain, I took us to Mars-ten, via plus "Captain, can to subtract the on rau axis. Either that, or I'm a patient in a planet's orbital speed. We've time to make locked ward." the attempt."

Your it "Copilot." Behind "Take easy, Jake. It doesn't resemble Mars as much as Earth-ten resembles "Captain!" Conscious Mind Earth." 'Along L axis, subtract vector twenty-four that just bit klicks second and for God's sake "Uh. may I point out we saw a per — WHY LIMIT YOURSELF to of Earth-ten, on a moonless night?" don't get the signs reversed!" "Meaning we didn't see it. Conceded." "I won't!" five senses? There is a greater Aunt Hilda said, "I told you it was Bar- "Execute." world of realization behind your soom, You wouldn't listen." Seconds later Jacob reported, "that outer self. Impressions of these it, I "Hilda, I apologize. Barsoom. Copilot, does Captain. hope." extrasensory powers occasion- "Let's ten seconds log it. New planet, Barsoom. named by check. Two readings, feeling call ally arise. The strange right o! discovery by Hilda Corners Bur- apart. I'll call the first, you the end often of impending danger— an intui- roughs, sciehce officer of Continua Craft seconds. Mark!" tive hunch— receiving another's Gay Deceiver. We'll all witness: Z. J. Carter, Zeb added. "One point two; Record." terribly long time, unspoken thought— these indi- commanding; Jacob J. Burroughs, chief After what seemed a cate unused potentialities. officer; D.T.B. Carter, uh, astrogator. I'll Jacob said, "Seven seconds . . . eight sec-

send certified copies to Harvard Obser- onds nine seconds . . . mark\" They are natural phenomena. vatory as soori as possible." Our men conferred, then Jacob said. To understand, develop, and "Captain, we are still falling too fast. Do you them can transform your direct Hilda get that feeling?" whole personality. They pro- the I knew that "my" Barsoom was not "Of course," said Deety. "We've been per- vide greater insight and planet of the classic romances. But there accelerating from gravity. Escape speed sonal achievement. are precedents: The first nuclear sub- for Mars is five klicks per second.—If Bar- FREE BOOK marine was named for an imaginary under- soom has the same mass as Mars sea vessel made iamous by Jules Verne: "Thank you. Astrogator. Jake, can you The Rosicrucians, a worldwide an aircraft carrier of the Second Global War trim off, uh, four klicks per second?" cultural organization (not a re- had been harried Shangri-La for a land as "Sure!" ligion) have the facts about nonexistent as Erewhon; the first space "Do it." extrasensory powers. A your freighter had been named for a starship "Uh . . . done! How does she look?" Mastery Life free book The of that existed only in the hearts of its millions "Uh . . . distance slowly cldsing. Hello, tells how you may share this of fans —the list is endless. Nature copies Gay." practical knowledge. Use cou- art. "Howdy, Zeb." ahead. pon or write to Scribe XGI Or as Deety put it: "Truth is more fantastic "Program. Radar. Target dead than reality." Range."

During that hour Barsoom rushed at us. It "No reading." me ROSICRUCIANS began to swell and sweil, so rapidly that "Continue ranging. Report first reading. (AMORC) binoculars were a nuisance, and my heart Add program. Display running radar California 95191 U.S.A. San Jose, swelled with it. in childlike joy. Deety and I ranges to target." unstrapped ourselves so that we could see "Program running. Who blacked your Psmbe X.G.I. floating just behind our eye?" The ROSICRUCIANS (AMORC) better, "above" and San Jose, California 95191 U.S.A. husbands while steadying ourselves on "You're a smart girl, Gay." their headrests. Tm sexy, too. Over." Please send me a complimentary copy of the book "THE MASTERY OF LIFE." We were seeing it in half-phase, one halt "Continue program." Zeb sighed, then in darkness, the other in sunlight —ocher said, "Copilot, there's atmosphere down

and umber and olive-green and brawn, and there. I plan to attempt to ground. Com-

all of it beautiful. ment? Advice?"

Our pilot and copilot did not sightsee; "Captain, those are words I hoped to Zebbie kept taking sights, kept Jacob busy hear. Let's go!" calculating. At last he said, "Copilot, if our "Barsoom — here we come!" OO , .

exited. Rooms with an even number of ing, had the lesson thrown back at them GMfUlES walls pose no problem; A line enters twice when a student realized thai nothing in the and exits twice to cross each wall. But three rules requires the lines to go through the of the rooms have five walls each — an odd centers of the dots and offered a three-line

In this case, if line starts outside solution: 1 . MATCH UP Steinfeld's solution is ai left. number: a

Barlow's al right: the room, it must end within it after all five

walls are crossed; if it starts inside, it ends

outside. If there were only two such rooms, the line would simply start in one and end in the other. But there are three such rooms, and so a continuous line must always fail to cross all the walls in at least one room.

It that weren't enough, according to

2. POTS. If the pots have hollow handles, 8. 2 = 1. The fallacy is in step 5: Dividing Eugene Raudsepp's Creative Growth as the drawings suggest, the smaller pot by {x - y) is the equivalent of dividing by Games, a friend of Stanford Professor would hold more coffee because its entire zero, an operation that has no answer— not James L. Adams came up with the ultimate handle is below the spout line. "zero" or "infinity" or any other number It is "cook"- a way to fold the paper so that all simply an operation that is not allowed in nine dots can be crossed off with one

3. TRIANGLES. Many readers sent the so- mathematics, precisely because it leads to straight line. lution at left, with six triangles. Jim such absurd conclusions as this one. Schmalzried. of Wabash. Indiana, created eight equilateral triangles in the Star of 9. THREE UTILITIES. This puzzle was first David pattern at right. posed by English puzzlist Henry Ernest

Dudeney in 1917. To prove it is impossible, imagine first that only two houses are to be connected to the utilities.

4, WALL John H. Strange, of London, En- gland, and Edward Huntress, of Skillman, New Jersey, pounced on the fact that noth- ing in the problem requires you to keep Doing this divides the plane into three re- 12. THE BEAR. The explorer could be your heels together or to touch your toes gions (labeled 1 , 2, and 3 in the drawing). standing near the South Pole, so close that with both hands at once. They suggested Your lines need not be exactly as shown, when the bear walks east, its 100-meter sliding the right leg upagainslthewall until but however you draw them, you will divide path carries it once around the Pole and one can bend over sideways to touch the the plane into three areas that are structur- back to where it started. The man could left toes, then reversing the procedure to ally identical to those shown. House C must stand even closer to the Pole, allowing the touch the right toes. Huntress adds, "I con- go in one of the three regions. If it goes in 1 bear to circle it twice, or three times, and so

it if it it cut on. firmed this by trying the exercise. I hope the is cut off from water; goes in 2, is

pain stops soon." off from gas; if it goes in 3, it is cut off from Benjamin Schwartz found two other

electricity. Wherever house C is placed, it is families of infinite solutions. In one, the bear 5. CAKE. Restack the pieces after the cut off from one of the utilities; hence, the stops exactly opposite the man on theother second vertical cut, then make the last problem is insoluble. side of the Pole, after circling it one and a slice down through the four-wedge tower. half or two and a half times, etc. In the other, 10. NICOTINE FITS. Seven cigarettes. The man and bear start on opposite sides of the

bulls from the six new cigarettes are com- Pole, the man farther from it. The bear's bined to make the seventh. Recently L. Y. hike can then be a half-circle, full circle, Wu demonstrated that one can actually one and a half, two, etc., ultimately becom- start with fewer than 36 butts and achieve ing a pirouette on the Pole itself. the same result. He starts with just 35 butts Bear-hunting season is still open, ac- and borrows a butt from someone else to cording to Martin Gardner R. S. Burton of- make the sixth cigarette. He then returns fered a solution that took into account the the butt of his seventh cigarette to the earth's spin (the Coriolis effect). Schwartz lender. replied that this solution was impractical because the bullet would have to fly impos- sibly slowly for the earth's spin to have any noticeable effect on its trajectory In the spirit of gamesmanship, however, Schwartz offered a substitute Coriolis solu-

6, PETS. No puppie 20 -uiisris. and 80 tion; "The shot has a muzzle velocity of goldfish. about 17,000 mph. just sufficient to keep the bullet in orbit at an altitude of five feet

ANSWERS TO READERS' PUZZLES above the ground. It continues to circle the earth indefinitely, with its orbit precessing 7. FIVE ROOMS. The line must either enter 53 to the west, until (with probability 1) it hits

height five feet. . . a room from outside or start within it. With any bear of more than the exception of the starting and ending Stanford University instructors, using this (Note: After shooting, the hunter is required rooms, each room entered must also be puzzle to show how old habits block think- toduck.)"DO 130 OMNi -

tion of the melal bar in his home on the night of April 21, 1979. UFD While Herrmann was in the bedroom of his mobile home that Saturday night, the = of Ubatuba led to Robert Ogilvie. a pro- room suddenly brightened. He looked fessor oi metallurgy at MIT, who conducted around and saw a ball of blue light emanat- an analysis of a fragment supplied to the ing from the top of his dresser. The light magazine by APRO. grew in intensity andjhen, just as suddenly

The specimen was examined by metal began to fade. As it did so, Bill made out a lographic analysis to determine its me- faint object in the center of the vanishing chanical and thermal history. Electron ball of light. Dazed and puzzled. Herrmann probe microanalysis was employed to de- crossed the room and picked up a rectan- termine the chemical composition and the gular bar similar to a small ingot of precious distribution of elements within the speci- metal, Overwhelmed by the experience, he men. Results of these tests showed the remained silent and distant as he pon- metal to be pure magnesium. No impurities dered the strange, symbollike markings or alloying elements, such as aluminum, engraved in the bar Immediately after re- SLIDES Kit Peak N< zinc, manganese, or tin. were lound. An gaining his composure, he notiiied Wen- Obseruarory Sacra oxygen x-ray map picked up magnesium delle Stevens, who had been the initial in- Observorory. PRINTS and oxygen x-ray signals, thus confirming vestigator in the case. Stevens notified the network to be magnesium oxide. APRO. which arranged for Dr. Walter POSTERS "My conclusion," says Ogilvie. "is that Walker to analyze the bar. A careful visual the specimen from Brazil has a composi- and microscopic examination revealed that These are available rhroughrhe 1979 in Precision ther- Revised Edirionof our Caralog which tion that would be found magnesium the artifact was a casting. includes a new solar photography weld metal. However, the structure is in- mal analysis and qualitative and semiquan- deed unusual. In my opinion it could only titative chemical analysis identified the have been tormed by heating the mag- material as hard lead containing 4 to 6 per- Send $1.00 in U.S. currency or very close to its melting point in air. cent antimony. mrernarional money order only to: nesium It would be necessary to hold the tempera- Two small metal fragments of the Herr- Catalog ture for only a minule or so. This would mann bar were sent by Omni to MIT for Kitt Peak National Observatory produce an oxide coating on the material, metallographic and electron probe testing. P.O. Box 26625- O which is clearly visible. Also, oxygen would Results of MIT's analysis fairly duplicated Tucson, Arizona 85726 diffuse down the grain boundaries, thereby APRO's conclusions. The specimen was

Due to Christmas demand, please producing the oxide network. It is therefore made of a cast alloy, and its composition allow 4—6 weeks delivery. quite possible that the specimen from approximated that of lead water pipes or of Brazil was a piece of a weld metal from an lead grids from an automobile battery. This exploding aircraft or a reentering satellite." analysis corroborated APRO's finding that the fragments contained 6 percent anti- e Another intriguing example in the search mony. for extraterresiria SLOstaices is the Wil- The second time Herrmann was ab- liam Herrmann case. Despite its sen- ducted, he was told the following by an sationalists overtones and parallels with alien aboard the UFO; "In regard to the bar. the film Close Encounters at the Third Kind, we have been authorized to give solely and

the Herrmann case has generated little or without favor to you, It is a gift of respect no. publicity. Herrmann had decided to and appreciation. You are one of the few to

minimize the details of his experience be- receive such a bar It has much value to us

cause of his wish for privacy. However, be- . . .though it is regarded as worthless to you cause of a recent turn of events, he has when its value is estimated according to decided to publicize his case in the hope of your primitive measure of comprehension." acquiring some insight into the origin of the A statement that was made by Dr. Walker phenomenon. some time ago while studying the Brazilian The Charleston UFO observations magnesium specimen best sums all this began on November 12. 1977. On a clear up, "Perhaps the extraterrestrials used day, with 20-mile visibility, Herrmann ob- methods within our technology and materi- served a bright-silver, metallic disk. The ob- al available on Earth, and therefore their ject was describing strange triangular pat- handiwork cannot be distinguished from Whatever the conclusions, pro or FIELD TESTER CAP terns in the sky near the South Carolina our own." Electric and Gas power towers adjacent to con, one thing is certain, events of this type This is comfortable sportsman's billed a the Ashley River basin west of Dorchester help to give us a better understanding of an cap. Black mesh (air cooled) and adjust- Road, This object was also seen by other enigma yet to be solved. Of course, the able to any size head, with an official residents in the North Charleston area. The whole world is waiting for the moment when Field Tester" patch on "Jack Daniel's sighting would set the stage for a series of the proverbial flying saucer lands on the the front. Guaranteed to shade your eyes inexplicable events. In a brief period of a White House lawn (see "Illegal Aliens," page start lot of conversations. and a year and a half, more than 40 sightings, 9 of 84), Until then, however we'll have to settle price includes postage My S5.25 which were by Herrmann, of a similar ob- tor random chunks of metal accompanied and handling. ject occurred in the Charleston area. Not by stories so weird they cannot be ignored.

Send check, money order, or use Ameri- only has Herrmann photographed the ob- If you know of anyone who has knowl- can Express, Visa or Master Charge, ject, but he claims lo have been abducted edge of, or possesses, any hard evidence including all numbers and signature. by alien visitors on two separate occasions, relating tothe UFO phenomenon, contact the

(Tennessee residents add 6% sales la*.) March 18, 1978, and May 16, 1979. Perhaps Aerial Phenomena Research Organiza-

For a color oaliilc:-: iu I v ok T.?r -ess?= i:«ns. the most signilicant event, in terms of val- tion. 3910 East Kleindaie Street, Tucson, Ari- sen.: Sl.ilrji:. ,i[.ovt; .j.:i:i.-(!SS. A idating his experience, was the materializa- zona 85712, or phone 602-323- 1825. DO "

would have served well for Comey himself, propitious begmnng -.vol, Id bo to start tell- and in 1953 the younger lovably insidious ing the truth. EARTH personality, listening to a Crossman lec- 'Admit thai low-level radiation can cause CONTINUED FROM i^AGF 14 ture, -liked what he heard. Crossman's cancer and long-term genetic effects, The salient trait oi the board members was seven principles for successful propagan- "Confess thai mportant safety research that they had children in their late teens. da became Comey's own. "As you listen to on light-water reactors has never been Just before Christmas vacation, he called Crossman's principles," he now fold his lis- done and that some has been done im- the children and described for them the teners, "I am su*e you will understand what properly damage a nuclear reactor would do to the French writer Fontenelle meant when "Stop hiding you "computer codes under Cayuga Lake. he said, 'Truth enters the mind so naturally the cloak of a 'proprietary' designation, and

"The kids made their parents' Christmas that when one hears it for the first" time, it let them be analyzed by the academic and absolutely miserable," Harding recalls. seems one is only remembering what one engineering community at large. "David got irate calls from board members. already knows.' "Admit that you are not enchanted with reliability delivcrability presently But it was too late. He had caused a bunch Crossman's first principle was, perhaps, the and of plants. of small uprisings. It was the beginning of the most unexpected: The basis for ail suc- operating nuclear the' end. Four out of ten board members cessful propaganda is the truth. "It is a "Reveal all ol the costs of nuclear- electricity, opposed the site, at which point it was hard complete delusion to think of the brilliant generated both present and for the 'Staff to push for it." propagandist as being a professional liar," twenty years into the future. Comey went on to become a specialist in Crossman had told Comey "The brilliant "Do an energetics input-output model of reactor safety but he would become skill- propagandist is the man who tells the truth the nuclear program as a whole; then do a energy ful, too, at finding holes in industry evacua- and tells it in such a way that the recipient comparable one for alternative tion plans! in reactor-reliability claims, in does not think that he is receiving any sources and reveal which ones come out industry boasts on reactor economics. He propaganda. The art of the propagandist is ahead on this basis. was among the first to use the Freedom of never to be thought a propagandist, but [tol "Tell the public why you have not been Information Act to lorce nuclear secrets out able to reprocess spent fuel and what im- into the light. His motives were not those pact the lack of sufficient storage pools common to hjs movement. He seemed less may have over the next ten years. concerned with stopping nuclear power "Talk about the ethics of our consuming admit being "antiriu- electricity from fission reactors for fifty (he would' never to tComey was a paradox, clear") than with stopping its proponents years and saddling twenty thousand future from/y/ng so much. The dishonesty of nu- deliberate and self-made; an generations with the social and environ- clear power seemed to offend him more environmentalist mental problems of perpetually caring for high-level than the threat of it, and the last ten years of the actinide-contaminated like captain his life were spent ferreting out the truth (or who dressed a radioactive wastes. badgering, since Comey was a stubby man). of industry; an "Discuss the threats to democratic soci- plutonium economy. If Comey ever revealed himself publicly, it ety posed by a outrageous hyperbolist with Solzhenitsyn, was in a speech he gave before the Atomic "You may, like [Aleksandrl. * Industrial Forum in February1975. There, in a passion (when ask, 'If the first tiny droplet of truth has exploded like a psychological bomb, what the den of the opposition, he began: "The serious) for the truth3 Greek playwright Aristophanes once wrote, will happen in our country when waterfalls

'Wise men often learn from their enemies.' I of truth come crashing down?' us, less credi- will assume you are wise men; I think you "The more you ignore the ble probably assume I am your enemy. you become. "When Carl Goldstein called me two "Perhaps you fear that a full and frank weeks ago to invite me to give a talk to you seem to be a bluff, simple, honorable discussion of these issues will result in no about the nuclear industry's lack of credi- enemy who would never think of descend- further use of light-water fission reactors.

bility he said he did not want me to spend ing to the level of propaganda." "So be it. That is the price of living in a thirty minutes flinging your past mistakes in Principle Two. The key to successful democratic republic, your faces; [he wanted] something posi- propaganda is accurate inlormation. "'But the nation's economic health de- tive, such as what the industry could now Three. The most successful propagan- mands use of nuclear power, regardless of of feels it!' do to improve its credibility. He also wanted dist is the person who cares about educa- how a majority the public about of you say. me to 'spill my secrets' on how I operate. tion. some may insight into "I later ran this by the Ruling Presidium of Four. 7o do propaganda well, one musl "Eureka! You have just had an the Antinuclear Cabal, and there was some riot fall in love with it. your own totalitarian tendencies.

"I I fulfilled Carl Goldstein's consternation that I would even consider Five, A successful propBgandist cannot hope have

I afford to mistakes. request that I talk both about how operate revealing my methods. I later received a mak& cable instructing me. Tell them nothing Six. The propagandist must b'e credible and about how the nuclear industry might they can use.' Although there is an old to the other side, not your own. become more credible.

Neapolitan adage, 'You surrender your lib- Seven, it is the understatement thai suc- "I rather suspect I may also have com- best. plied with my cable instructions not to tell erty to him to whom you tell your secrets,' I ceeds

that, told his you anything you will use. I have told you all have decided that I can safely tell you what And Comey enemies, was

they are." all there was to it. you need to know, namely, Crossman's

His secrets, Comey explained to the nu- Comey went on: "Crossman says the principles, but I doubt that more than a

clear men, had been learned from R.H.S. successful propagandist is the person who handful of you believe me. and I am rea- Grossman, the British officer in charge of cares about educating the public. He sonably confident not a one of you will use Allied psychological warfare in Europe dur- wants people to think for themselves, as one bit of it." ing the Second World War. Crossman, an individuals, and not accept the party line. And in this prediction — on the evidence Oxford don and a lecturer on Plato's Repub- That is hardly a philosophy many industry at least of Three Mile Island, where industry lic and on Marx, also had been a genius at executives embrace; they want the public denied "or minimized each danger until it propaganda, a man with "a lovable and to 'accept' nuclear power, and that is quite became impossible to do so a moment likable but extremely insidious personality," another thing. longer, then minimized the next danger- according to a colleague. That description "Should you wish to become credible, a David Comey proved right. OO

134 OMNI Results of Competition #6: Partly Baked Ideas cqnnPETiToru By Scot Morris

the April Omni we asked for specu- ' GRAND PRIZE grasshoppers, collecting them in traps at Inlations, provocative questions, WINNER ($100) boundaries of fields, process and market

suggestions for novel experiments, ' The leaves of the prayer plant open in them as "prairie shrimp" for animal and unusual applications of technology, daylight and close in darkness. In a room human consumption. Industries exploiting machines that should be built —in short, gradually shorten the 24-hour light-dark other "pests." such as starlings, walking what I, J. Good, in his book The Scientist cycle to 23 hours, then 22, and so on. until catfish, the crown ofthorns, rats, flies, and Speculates, calls partly baked ideas the light is flashing on and off at strobe cockroaches, should also be explored. (pbis). frequency. At that time, if the soil and the —Terry B. Grund, Lawrence, Kans. Some pbis were barely warm: We got ::>ol are lightweight enough, the prayer several designs for perpetual-motion plant will flap its leaves, lift off the table, Tooth decay is caused by the secretions of machines and one trisect-the-angle and fly away. bacteria {Streptococcus /nutans) that scheme. Others were too familiar:' solar —Steven L. Oxier. Baltimore, Md. colonize our mouths. So far, efforts to cells on the root of electric cars, RUNNERS-UP prevent decay are aimed at reinforcing holographic television, EEG-pattern ($25) tooth enamel, scrubbing S. mutans off, music, the old idea that atoms are small Perhaps during times of stress, such as a etc, Instead, why not treat tooth decay as solar systems containing rnicrouni verses change in environment, the body an ecological problem? Create a hybrid (or, conversely, that our galaxy is a produces gene-mutating chemicals that nondecay-producing bacterium that will molecule in God's toenail), and endless increase random in mutations descen- crowd S. mutans out of its cozy little niche fanciful, impractical schemes to tap such dants to ensure the filling of any new in the mouth. Look, Ma, no cavities! "unused" energy sources as pedestrians, ecological created! niches — Draper L. Kauffman, St. Louis, Mo. highway qr subway traffic, and even the —Dennis S. Murray Kent, Wash. kinetic energy of falling leaves or water The problem with the common umbrella is draining of out the bathroom sink. Certain cerebral arteries, if "hyper- that one can't stand under the middle of it. Despite the gnawing fear that one of the tensed," burst may and cause a stroke. A because the handle is there. How about ideas we tossed in the reject pile might polyethylene tube, thin enough to rupture an umbrella with the handle to one side so turn up as a Nobel Pri2e winner in 1990, we just below the "popping pressure point," the user can stand where maximum rain boldly dismissed about three quarters ol could be threaded into any exterior protection is. the entries on various grounds : abdominal — arteriole, be worn on a belt —Alan Wallace, Pleasant Hills. Pa. impractical, unclear too esoteric, too long, encased in transparent plastic, and be not new, and so then on— passed the rest monitored like a fuse. "Blown fuse" How about a car that a deaf person can along to guest judge I, J. Good for his warnings might prevent brain damage. drive? A microphone triggers a red light helpful suggestions and perceptive —Sumner L. Shapiro, M.D., Encino, Calif. inside the car — continuous light for a horn. comments. (Some of his comments, and flashing for a siren, brighter as the sound our own, are appended to the pbis below.) Bats catch insects by using their "sonar"; gets louder.

We cannot vouch for the premises of so it seems reasonable that some insects —James Martin Prochnik. Fairfax, Va. some for pbis, nor their ultimate originality. might have evojved a way to detect these Inevitably, some of these pbis will have sounds as a defense. If so, an electronic My pbi involves ESP and photography. been proposed independently, insect repellent could reproduce the bat's What I've done is photograph with the lens somewhere else. But an attitude of sound to frighten insects away cap in place and rely on an audience's "Somebody must have thought of this —John McCown, Camargo, 111. inner resources, to say the least. Someday belore and found it wouldn't work" is a I plan to have a gallery showing of my primary inhibition to fully baking an idea Some people dream in black-and-white, credit slips from the photo lab. and publishing it— a bias that this some i'n color. Since the concept of —Laurence E. Leidecker Warren. Pa. competition was designed to remedy. black-and-white dates from the origin of (This entry was accompanied by atotally Since we couldn't guarantee the originality photography and is less than 200 years black 35mm slide.) of any of the winning ideas, we awarded old, did our forefathers presumably always top prize to a frivolous suggestion dream jn color? HONORABLE MENTION that caught our fancy for its very —Gary Peterson, Chicago, III. The Aztec number system is base-12. outrageousness. Most pbis listed below instead of the more common base-10. How have been paraphrased for brevity and In 1978 Kansas suffered an do we know that the original Aztecs clarity; most are serious, but some are infestation of grasshoppers. There was weren't mutants with six fingers on each humorous— not always intentionally. We talk of lifting bans on dangerous insec- hand? leave it to you to decide which is which. ticides. A better solution: Harvest the —Cindy Groskreutz, Sarasota, Fla. |

Free! Our latest For family planning, a woman should know In her native North Africa, Ihe basenji bitch precisely when she is ovulating, but has estrus once a year. The American keeping charts is a drag and susceptible basenji, first introduced here in the late opinion on any into season two or even to error. I propose a small calendar ctock 1930s, now comes 3 of 1,200 with a computer memory in which to three times a year, regardless of climate, record such data as the date of the last nutrition, or activily Why? America the widely held stocks ovulation, signs of mucus, bleeding, and Fertile? daily temperature. The alarm clock rings — Annfciordness. dog breeder. once, and the woman straps its Nordann Kennels, Staten Island, N.Y Alerrill Lynch offers up-to-date thermometer under her arm and goes back to sleep. In five minutes the alarm How about a regular publication for research reports and opinions goes off again, having recorded and printing pbis, The Journal of Creative each of over (called QRC^s) on stored her basal tempera'ture. Speculation? If he so requesls, the 1,200 widely traded important — C. Meyer, Houston, Tex. submitter can sign with a number instead of a name. stocks. Cerritos. Calif. It is possible that the pools oi oil lying in — Brijin Kenny, are yours free— and are They our earth's substrata act as shock (This suggestion is mentioned in The excellent briefing tools whenever absorbers or as lubricants for the earth's Scientist Speculates, in which a 1958 is Also, there is a new you are considering an opportu- surface platelets. Could the pumping out proposal cited. of this oil cause more friction in the periodical in Australia called Speculations nity, reviewing your holdings, or platelets' normal shifting, more jerky in Science and Technology . — I. J. Good) making a decision. movements, more earthquakes? QRQ reports include recom- —Robert A. Albert, Jacksonville, Fla. I've heard that people who live near airports die of heart disease and strokes, mendations on the stock's suit- Portrait painters and photographers could while those who live near railroad tracks

ability for different investment it pay the biggest compliments (and get the don 'I. If this is so, perhaps is because objectives. Plus specific buy and highest commissions) by depicting a the train makes a low rilmble and the jet subject in reversed, left-right image, which aircraft emits a high-pitched whine. sell recommendations. Park, Calif. is the only way a person ever sees himself —Alexander Furie, Canoga This is backed up by data on when he looks into a mirror. (Or is it that the noise of the train increases reported and estimated future —Shimon Israel, New York, N.Y. more gradually lhan that of the plane? earnings. Annual dividend pro- -I. J. Good) A wide-angle TV camera pointing back jections. Whether or not options from a car is monitored on a dashboard Clock radios with timers for "music to fall are available on the issue. Indus- display for complete rear-view vision. asleep by" need two volume controls, one try trends or corporate news. And —Howard Glanton. Montrose, Mich. adjustable for soft levels when falling asleep, the other preset to a desired

more. ' Let's have one standard time throughout alarm-volume level, usually rather loud, for For Free reports just mail the the world. When it's 5:00 rm„ May 30, in waking up. coupon below. Greenwich. England, it's the exact same — Mark Smith, Stone Mountain, Ga. -Mail today-for Free reports- — time in New York, Tokyo, p Moscow— everywhere. This would Why not develop a synthetic "dark eliminate the international dateline, time chlorophyll" that will absorb energy from zones, and daylight saving time. Work types of radiation outside the visible

ill . 60' shifts would be more economic, scientific spectrum, for a new avenue for solving our Or call toll free 24 hours a day, 7 days a week 800-223-1910. measurements of time would be more increasing food problem? In New York Stale 800-522-5605. consistent, and international appointments —John Miller. Clifton Park, N.Y. In Alaska and Hawaii call the missed because of "my time, yourtime" Merrill Lynch office nearest you. confusion would be a thing of the past. My observations of alcoholics thai I have your current Please send me QRQ —David Kohn, Burlingame, Calif. known showed that all had a strong dislike opinions on the following stocks: for milk and a preference for salted foods Can suitable hypnotic suggestions make over sweet foods. If these correlations hold blood one a calculating prodigy? After all, up, perhaps there's a link between multiplying big numbers merely involves chemistry, food preference, and the the repeated use of a few simple predisposition toward alcoholism. algorilhms, easily within the capabilities of —Gwenne A. Zobel, Medford, Greg. the "subconscious." —Paul Hsieh, Kalamazoo, Mich. The existence of ESP has been hard to demonstrate using ordinary statistical The bacterium Escherichia coli.. a normal melhods and ordinary numbers. inhabitant of the large intestine, is the most Mathematicians should try examining common cause of recurrent urinary-tract irrational phenomena with irrational

infections (UTJs). It would seem that the numbers, shorter the distance from the anus to the — Pamela Bethke, Detroil Lakes, Minn. urethra or vaginal orifice, the more likely an

E. coli is to migrate that distance. Is there a After many years lying awake listening to correlation between anus-urethra male family members make noises like

proximity and incidence of recurrent UTls? terocious beasts, it occurred to me that > Merrill Lynch If so, Ihe measurement could be used to perhaps snoring evolved m primitive man Pierce ftwicr W&Srraih Int. / Menflll-mch identify persons" at risk and to institute because the fierce noise frightened Abreed apart. —J p-ophyiac':c measures. dangerous intruders away -Steven C. Horii, M.Q, New York, N.Y — Christina Lipper, Sonoma. Calif. DCJ PAPER CHASE EXPLDR^TOTUS By Cheryl Simon

ulhor i^^k David Macaulay, in his new scoops up a handful of the chips, and and we roll up our sleeves. We become M^^K book, Motel of Ihe Mysteries, invites us to look at it. It resembles an conscious of our breathing in the thick air m % describes a cataclysmic overused cotton ball, wet and gummy. The humidity clinging to our clothes and reduction in postal rates that causes The rotten-egg smell emanating from skin is an insignificant fraction of the 20 modern civilization to be buried by tons of the digester results from the chemicals - a million gallons of water that the plant third- and fourth-class mail. Like so many solution of sodium hydroxide, sodium consumes each day. fantasies, Macaulay's is based partly on carbonate, and sodium sulfide — used to This plant, 130 years old, is in transition. fact. Every year the average American cook ihe wood chips. After about three Old-style drab-green passageways and uses enough newsprint, cardboard, hours the combination of chemicals, heat, metal stairs lead to rooms paperboard, glaring with and copy paper to fill six and live pressure steam degrades and fluorescent light and modern steel-blue steamer trunks. This translates to 636 dissolves the lignin (the cement that holds equipment. The papermaking machines pounds per person. the wood fibers together). Still in the form never stop. The machines spew out a Though information is transmitted of chips, the wood then enters a blow tank, million pounds, or 453,000 kilograms, a increasingly by electronic means, we where a rapid drop in pressure loosens the day, A thousand workers are employed depend more and on more paper to adhesive and reduces the chips to pulp, here. contain food, present news, and provide After the fibers are mixed with water and "From the beater, the pulp flows to structure for homes and fodder for are screened to remove wood slivers and refiners, and the fibers are cut to uniform voracious photocopiers. dirt, the pulp is mixed with chemicals and size. Their surfaces are roughened so that Not surprisingly almost every state has bleached in four stages it until turns white. they will bond together properly on the a booming papermaking industry. While After the first cycle, a sample sheet, paper machine. the technology undergoes continual resembling the brown paper used for The puip is now ready to be mixed with refinement, the basic process has grocery bags, is for made testing. Then water to form a slurry, which is about changed little since a Chinese court the pulp enters a beater. Color, il desired, 99.5-percent water and . 5-percent pulp. official, Ts'ai Lun. invented paper in a.q sizing, and other chemicals are added as We watch as it flows onto the Foudrinier 105. Fibers from the inner bark of a paper required for specific papers-. wire, the papermaking machine mulberry named for tree and from bamboo were Our group straggles to the far side of the brothers who first used such a cooked, pressed, and dried. Despite the enormous room, skirting the digester, machine in London in 1804. A screen, modern machinery, awesome in its speed and efficiency, this is essentially the same process used today The S. D Warren plant in Westbrook, Maine, is but one of many paper mills where this ancient art has been adapted to meet present-day needs. The five of us waiting for a tour shuffle restlessly in a corner of the front lobby Then our tour guide arrives. We don hard hats as he leads us down a narrow passageway to a cavernous room where wood chips begin their conversion from timber to paper; Our first stop is the digester a steel-gray vessel three stories tall. The wood, debarked and chipped into inch-long pieces, is cooking at temperatures from 160°to18O°C. But this is no ordinary kitchen, with wholesome aromas exuding from conventional ovens. The overwhelming impression is one of. moisture. Though there is ample light, a 'steamy haze enshrouds the gurgling digester Our guide reaches into the overflow vat, Raw material from which over 50 million tons of paper are produc 7

r : which can be more than nine meters wide, between heavy calender rolls to develop Theremainde o ou' two-hour tour moves forward continuously, vibrating stiffness and a final smooth finish. Now the consists of strolling down seemingly constantly from side to side to interlace the paper can be rolled onto "parent" rolls. endless corridors. Our group is herded fibers and extract the water. Most of the The produciion of paper is merely one aside to dodge a manned vehicle zipping water drains off as the newly formed web part of the papcrmak ng ix.sness. by with its load of paper rolls. We enter a of fibers moves forward at speeds as fast Depending on the kind of paper desired, room where a machine called the as 914 meters (3,000 feet) per minute. paper can be coated, embossed, Jagenberg Vari-Roll splits the rolls into as The sheet passes to the second section laminated, or calendered to yield a variety many as five smaller rolls of manageable of the whirring papermaking machine, ol strengths and shiny, matte, or textured size. Conveyors near the high ceiling carry which snatches the sheet from the wire finishes. These choices may be governed suspended parent rolls into the room tor splitting. and whisks it on to the press section. by the kinds of raw wood that are used. the Felted rolls press out more water. Most Softwood, the wood of needle-bearing In the coating room we watch as paper retains about 5 percent of its water, trees, yields higher-quality papers paper runs through a gooey substance, of Latex paint. The paper but still more than 153 cubic meters of because the longer fibers adhere to make the consistency water must be removed for every ton of a stronger product. Hardwood comes from is then dried in ovens about 28 meters paper produced. Gradually, as we broad-leaved trees. Because of its shorter long. Research laboratories continually search for new formulas that produce progress with the sheet down the length of fibers, if is used for lower grades high-quality but use less cost the machine, the air becomes hotter and of paper. It is often blended in varying coatings y drier. The sheet is wrapped around the proportions with softwood pulp at the chemicals, steam-heated d r ;im= and :hcn flattened paper machine. Glossy paper, used by most magazines, results when paper is coated and

semi-dried until it becomes tacky Then

boiling water is poured on, and the paper is wrapped around shiny chrome drums. The room shimmers beneath fluorescent lights: the drums reflect the paper's

sheen. If there is a scratch or a piece of

dust on a drum, the paper will pick it up. At the end of our tour, in the trimming room, a hissing blade cuts through stacks of paper six inches thick, thus completing a process begun by the lumberjack's chainsaw. IN TRANSIT ____ Many papermaking plants offer regular tours during the summer and, with several days' notice, will arrange special tours for individuals or small groups during the off season, There are paper mills scattered throughout the country, but the largest producers are Georgia, Alabama. Louisiana. Washington, Florida, Oregon, Mississippi, South Carolina, Maine, and Virginia. There are several easy approaches to setting up a tour. One is to go to a local library and check Lockwood's Directory ol the Paper and Allied Trades — a massive "Will bible for all and hundreds of illustrations, become the compendium that lists every pulp and sf fans," says ISAAC ASIMOV; "by "no serious fan can afford to be paper mill. Also, the yellow pages, under far the most inclusive history of without it."-Norman Spinrad. the "Paper Manufacturers" heading, will sf so far, "says PHILIP jose At bookstores or mail coupon today. list the plants in a given area. A phone call FARMER; "the most valuable sf to the public-aifairs director will yield DOUBLEDAY & COMPANY. INC. answers to most tour-related questions. source book ever written" says Dept. ZA-962 Finally, some of the largest, most diverse FRANK HERBERT. Garden City. New York 11530 paper mills are: The biggest names in science Please send me copies of THE SCIENCE fiction biggest sf FICTION ENCYCLOPEDIA as follows: acclaim the Champion Paper Corporation, RO. Box copies @ $24.95 hardcover; reference book ever published— 200, Stamford, Conn. 06921 copies @ $12.95 paperback. a complete A to z encyclopedia Enclosed is my check or money order. I with over 2,800 entries covering understand you will pay all shipping and Boise Cascade, 1600 SW Fourth Avenue, authors, themes, films, maga- handling costs. If I don't agree that this Is a P.O. Box 1414, Portland. Oreg. 97207

book I must keep. I'll return it within two crit- zines, illustrators, editors, weeks for a full prompt refund. International Paper Company, 220 East ics, film-makers, publishers, 42nd Street, New York, N.Y. 1001 pseudonyms, series, tv pro- grams, original anthologies, comics, sf in various countries, terminology, awards and fan-

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With over 700,000 words of text Offer expires December 31. 19E Hot Springs, Ariz. 71901 DO ,

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I apocalypse," says photographer Pete Tur — -' explosion. "Irr

small Icelandic Island of Heimaey, in annaeyjar.

'1'i i irj i in vffJU i HBB heat of the earth. Ic Mid-Atiantic Ridge, continental plates are being | a rate of two centimeters per fissures form builds, and the magma wells u, iditions are right for the CDruinnuruicMTorus CONTINUED FROM fif

individuals who were not astronomers. Even Ptolemy, in his astrological tome, the Tetrabiblos, distinguished between as- tronomy ("first both in order and in effec- When tiveness") and_astrology "so that one whose aim is the truth might never compare you make its perceptions with the sureness of the a sight; first, unvarying science." Kepler writes of the "follies and blasphemies oi astrolo- gers" and refers to astrology as the "foolish stepdaughter of astronomy ... a dreadful superstition." Ms. Crozier's reference to Newton as an astrologer is simply not sup- ported by the historical record. Astrologers may eventually realize what HANDCRAFTED iLtfl is truly known about celestial influences FROM P.O. Box 9B

and move into the twentieth century. I hope THE HOUSE Balboa, CA OFTAI 92662 so. Philip A. lanna Charlottesville, Va. Sterling Silver $20.00 _ UK Gold © $275.00 Check or money order From Extinction next? article the plight of the What This "comprehensive tool for enclosed Calif, res add 6% $ Kenneth Brower's on ihe would-be UFO investigator" VISA Master Charge Exp. Date _ California condor |Earth, August 1979] was {Raymond E. Fowler, author of The one of the most thought-provoking pieces Andreasson Affair) tells you everything I've read in a long time. Will man ever learn? you should know about techniques and It's too bad sq.many of us are born with procedures investigate used to UFO such inflated egos that we feel we have the reports; most likely sightings; to how ability and the right to play with nature judge other people's reports; much, whenever we deem it necessary. The con- much more. With photos, maps and line dot doesn't need man's help to survive. drawings in oversize Dolphin paperback Any intervention at all will probably do more •'•" "'-"'' -inniiPTpn.v harm than good.

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shape. It certainly wouldn't hurt to try. Jim Obremski Hopewell Junction, N.Y

Ex Officio In his "Official Circles; PSI on Capitol Hill" article [July 1979] about Representative Charlie Rose ot North Carolina. William K. Stuckey incorrectly referred to Terry San- ford as an "ex-university president." Al- though on sabbatical leave during the cur- rent academic year, Mr. Sanford remains the eminent president of Duke University. THE OMNI DIARY James A. Bobula, Ph.D. Duke Unversty FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL FUTURE. Durham. N.C.OO Not just a diary. A work'orkofof art, complete with full-color illustrations in '•-1 : (as they appear \ I ) marKing each&ach montmonth. And for every day in your PHOTO CREDITS schedule, you'll find an interesting piece of sc cn:ifie irfoma:ion.

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U.S. dollars or charge to AE, MC City _ or VISA, To expedite your charge State _ order call 800-526-4797 (except Check or money order enclosed N.J. ). Allow 8 weeks for delivery, Bank Americard (VISA) N.J, residents add 5% tax. D D American Express Master Charge rom ?r -Cenhry Kiss £ CnrislQ. Account # s! Dream. Lid ): pages 9B-99. Sieve Studio: page 120. Malcolm 5. Kirk. I I I I I JJJC L ; Expiration Date _ Telex: Replicar HALA519225 Tel: (305) 456-1500 Factories and Sales Offices Throughout the World 1

Maiibag: Readers shout "Eureka!" and pose their own problems

By Scot Morris

answer was 10 puppies, 2 This month's column is dedicated to triangle on the table, the Ihree other for $100? Our those readers who caught us napping on matches propped against one another to kittens, and 88 goldfish. Dozens of puzzles past and submitted alternate readers pointed out that 5 pups, 1 fish would be another solutions lo lead us down the path of kittens, and 84 only a few found the one Tightness for our games' sake (Questions possibility, but combination that tallies. (Hint; To find 1-6) and to the readers who tuned the other

it, doggedly forget something.) tables and sent us problems to sweat over you must (Questions 7-12). READERS' PUZZLES

1, MATCH UP (October 1978). We asked, continuous line "Can you move just one match to produce 7, FIVE ROOMS. Draw a every wall segment a valid equation?" The answer we wanted form three "vertical" triangles. Some that passes through readers found how to make six and even eight equilateral triangles with just six unbroken matches. Can you? (Hint: The rnaiches remain flat on the table, but (V overlap.) Sr 4. UP AGAINST THE WALL (November VI 1978). Can you stand with your back and heels against a wall and touch your toes

without bending your knees? We said it once only The illustration shows a failed couldn't be done: "When you bend over, attempt. The segment marked X remains solves the wasVl = 1. We disallowed one. shortcut, your hips must move back to keep your uncrossed, is there a path that

it. VI /I, but tailed to foresee two alternate . center of g ravity over your feet. The wall puzzle?The answer is no. Prove solutions sent in by Jay Stein-field, of prevents that; so you fall over." A few 8. PROOFTHAT 2 = 1. Several readers, Bellaire, Texas, and Agnes Barlow, of readers weren't convinced by this of El Paso, Texas, Country Lake. New Jersey. Can you find impeccable logic and found a way. (Hint: including Mike Speer. theirtwo new answers? Carefully reread the instructions to note T J. Waters, of Mesa, Arizona, and Van Illinois, what is, and is not, allowed.) Cleve Morris, of Wilmette, have 2, POTTED PROBLEM (November 1978). sent variations on the following

Which coffeepot holds more? We said they 5. CUT THE CAKE (December 1 978). mathematical paradox: Problem; Cut the birihday cake into eight equal pieces with just three straight cuts. 1. x = y (Given) 2 (Multiply both sides byx) We did it with two perpendicular vertical 2. x =xy 2 2 cuts and one horizontal cut. Unfortunately 3. x 2 -y 2 =xy -y (Subtract y from both) this leaves some pieces (the bottom four) 4. (x +y)(x -y) = y(x -y) (Factor) with less frosting than the others. A 5. x +y =y (Cancel out the (x.-y) term) twelve-year-old Chicago reader, Tom 6. 2y =y (Substitulex lory, by equation 1) Muller, found a way to equalize things. 7. 2 = 1 (Divide both sides byy) (Hint: His precarious solution is not strictly built on both hold the same, because the spouls disallowed by the instructions.) Two equals one? Is mathematics logical thinking rise to the same height. A half-dozen a house of sai tines? Is all 7 from readers argued that the short pot will hold about to crumble Save mathematics find more. Why? utter collapse. Study each step, and . the flaw in this proof.

3. TRIANGLES (October 1 978). Another UTILITIES. task here is to match problem asked you io arrange six 9. THREE The utility (gas, electricity water) matches into four equilateral triangles. We connect each to three houses without crossing intended - but didn't specify - that all four each of long and triangles would be equal with sides one 6. THE PET STORE (March 1979). lines. The paths can be as necessary, long as they match long. Our three-dimensional Puppies cost 55, kittens $3, and goldfish convoluted as so a or solution was a tetrahedron with one base 50 cents. How can you buy 1 00 animals don't cross (or pass under house 144 OMNI .

utility). The illustration shows a near-miss. Question: What color was the bear? the compartment plus the bird's weight,

Every connection is made except for water The classic answer to this chestnut except when the bird is in the air and is that the bear is white, since the only aGcetSf&ting up or down. The former place the explorer could be standing increases the weight of the system, the

would be exactly on the North Pole. latter reduces it. Only if the bird is in free There are no polar bears at the South fall is the system's weight lowered by the

Pole, but if there were, could the explorer weight oi the bird. Flapping birds alternate be in Antarctica? The answer is yes. There smail up-and-down accelerations, which are an infinite number of places— in fact, average out. The overall weighl ot the three sets of infinite places— where the system remains virtually the same. to house A. Can you solve the problem? It explorer can stand near the South Pole not, can you prove that nobody can? and satisfy the conditions of the prob- 9, BIKE TRICK. Pulling back on the lower lem. Can you think of any of them? The pedal causes the bicycle to move 10. NICOTINE FITS. Joe Eddy Brown, of ultimate analysis of the problem is Benja- backward. The force on the pedal is in the

Chicago, asks, "If a hobo can recycle one min Schwartz's article "What Color Was the direction that normally would push the new cigarette from six butts, how many Bear?" (Mathematics Magazine. Vol. 34, - bicycle forward, but the large size of the could he make out of thirty-six butts?" Sep1ember-October1960). For our wheels and the small gear ratio between (Hint: The answer isn't six.) abbreviated tour, see Answers, page 130.

1 1 THE NINE DOTS. Steve Werk, of ANSWERS to iive Martin Gardner puzzles Winnipeg, Manitoba, asks whether it is from last month. possible to connect all nine dots with

1, CUT-UPS. Can a square be dissected into five congruent parts, each having the same size and shape? Yes, there is only

one way to do it, and here it is. How smart does this make you feel? the pedal and the wheel sprockets are such that the bicycle is free to move

backward with the pull. When it does so, • • • the pedal actually moves forward with respect to the bicycle (that is, in a

counterclockwise direction in the . four straight lines. This puzzle. Werk says. illustration), although it moves backward is often used to show how people's with respect to the ground, If you don't unconscious assumptions restrict them believe all this, Gardner suggests, you'll from insightful solutions. People tend to simply have to get a bicycle and try it. keep their lines within the border of the 7. TALEOFATUB.Aplasticboatloaded nine dots, but nothing in the rules with nuts and bolts floats in a bathtub. 10. BELL ROPES. An acrobat wants to demands this. Can you break through When they are dumped, what happens to steal two bell ropes by climbing and mental boundaries to find the solution? the water level in the tub? It goes down. A cutting them at points as high as possible,

Some ingenious alternate solutions to floating object displaces its weight in yet avoiding a fall lo the concrete floor this puzzle have been proposed, in which water, a submerged object displaces its below. How can he get the most rope? He the nine dots are connected with three volume. When the metal cargo is dumped, first ties the lower ends of the ropes straight lines or. incredibly, with just one. the water level is lowered. together. He climbs rope A to the top and Can you imagine how? cuts rope B, leaving just enough rope to tie 8. PIGEONS. A truck driver carrying 200 into a small loop. Hanging by this loop, he 12. WHATCOLORWASTHEBEAR?Unc pigeons bangs on the side of his truck to cuts rope A off at the ceiling (without

Diamant, of New York City, says his favorite frighten the birds and make them fly letting it fall!), then passes the end of A puzzle is this: An explorer sees a bear 100 around in the compartment just long through the loop and pulls it through until meters due sooth of him. The bear walks enough for him to drive across a rickety the knot is at the loop. After letting himself

1 00 meters due east while the explorer bridge. His method won't work, however. down this double rope, he pulls it free of stands still. The explorer then points his The weight of a closed compartment the loop, thereby obtaining the entire gun due south, fires, and kills the bear containing a bird is equal to the weight of length of A and almost all of B.DO ' a . '

hETRUE PIONEERS OFSRCE' LAJDRD By LAP Moore

' llhough humans have been onSeptembe-20. and hey -eacned failed to.achieve orbit. The year ended . ^^\ '

*^^» claiming Us first! at every step 236,000 feet. The parachute functioned ' with a success when a rhesus named Sam-

# » in trie race to escape from perfectly but the recovery team couldn't .- mad.ea ballistic flight to 280;000"feet, Earth's gravity, we are aclually very late locate the returned capsule, which had returhing.inhigh spirits.. Humans entrants. Culled from public documents; landedjn a desert, The third and last of continued to provide technical and moral the following is a history of the true the monkeys' Aerobee attempts was made' support, but men failed to go aloft. The * '" '_- pioneers of the space race. on May 21, 1952: Michael and Patricia. time was not yel right. .i

It all began in September 1783. The first with two mice going along-fdr good luck,' The year 1960 started off well and got balloon to carry passengers from the reached an at. tud'; oi 36 miles. All better On January 21, a svelte, six-pound planet's surface rose from the courtyard of returned, safely, and the Monkey Curse rhesusnamed Miss Sam made a flight.- the palaceof Versailles, for an eight- was broken. - edging the monkeys ahead again, The - minute flight. On board were the first Belweenthe-.eight-mouse success and dogs sfuok back on August 19, when two explorers of the universe — a duck and the end.of 1952. there were 20 more Belka and Si'relka achieved orbit at 199 a rooster. You might say it was a fowl day, balloon flights. Balloonauts included fruit miles. Their craft, which weighed'10.000 The next major-step into space was 163 flies, mice, hamsters, cats: and dogs — pounds, remained in orbit for more than 24 years incoming. virtual airborne zoo. The flights ranged hours. Their orbital speed was 227 miles On December 17. 1946, fungus spores from 90.000 to 100.000 feet and lasted as per minute. Their flight totaled 437,500 took off in a balloon, headed for the top of long as 28 hours. Still, there was no word miles, setting a new record. Belka was the atmosphere. Their balloon was never from Man. two-and-a-half years old and weighed 4.5" seenagain. Fruifflies gave it a try in 1947. Between 1949 and 1959 dogs made the kilograms; a year younger, Strelka reaching air altitude of .106 miles. These great leap forward, going up in more than weighed a hefty 5.5 kilograms. insect adventurers returned safely to 40 rockets. On Novembers, 1957 - in a Also in the fall of 1960 Sally. Arhyf and swarrnsof welcome rs. feat every bit.as sgnrican: as that of Moe -three mice — took a 5,000- Albert, a rhesus monkey was sitting in a 1783 — a dog named Laika was.the first mile-long. 700-mile-high flight in an

V-2 rocket on June 18/1948, ready for earthling to orbit the planet. The conquest Atlas, reaching 18,000 mph and passing '..-. launch. There was an equipment failure, of space had begun; through the innerVan Allen radiation belt: however, and Albert never got off the Then the monkeys sent up one of their Late r.att-three had healthy, normal ground. This was to be the first of many own. Gordo, who followed a long ballistic offspring,' . problems encountered by the monkey path that took him beyond orbital distance. To.end the year, Pchelka and Mushka - space effort, leading to rumors of In a quick follow-up, Able and Baker, two went uo for the dogs on December 1 interspecies sabotage. A year later on female monkeys, reached an altitude of accompanied by insects and plants. And '.

" June 14, 1949, Albert II reached an 300 miles and a speed of 10,000 mph. Man was. finally thinking about entering the a t lude ol 83 mi es vine eating the original Both returned safely. race. A, or--: in their . and no-rhesus cause general. On June 3, 1959 three mice tried, but Not to be outdone by rhesus and

. Unlorlu'ialely. Albert II had problems. His squirrel monkey cousins, the failed! rclu'n oarachute; Two further rhesus chimpanzees made their move on January . ihc'iis. in ifK3 and in 1950, ended with 31," 1961. Chang (nicknamed Ham), a parao-nuto 'ailurcs. Clawing "caution." handsome chimp weighing 16.5 humans refused to. enter the race. It was a - kilograms, covered 414 miles in 16.5

: - claim we would hear again and again. " minutes in a flawless ballistic flight.

As if to shame Man. a mouse went up in On March 9 Chernushka, a female- dog. a ^2 .rocket in the summer of 1950, but his took off with a truly integrated return parachute alsofailed. Rapidly crew -guinea pigs', mice, insects, and' picking u.p'fhe fallen-mouse banner, eight seeds. A friend of hers. Zvezdochka, ' -ice 'D

2S. made tt ;o 97,0.00 feet, and then was thinking seriously, about entering the. returned safely.' '-. •---, race. Heartened by the success of the mice, Dn April- 12, 1961, Yuri, a male human -

r a monkey-tried the fi st Aerobee rocket on and citizen of the USSR, made one orbit

April 1-8. 1953/ Almost unbelievably, the around Earth inhis craft, Vostokl. Man return parachute iai'ed. ~- ying a new had finally arrived. tactic, monkey took 11 with him On November 29 of that year Enos, a . a mice _ when he lifted off in tne second Aerobee Mishka llelti and Ts'tgahka: ready for'spai male chimpanzee, made two orbits. DO