The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018 — Page 1 A Non-Fiction Newspaper First Class U.S. The New Hampshire Gazette Postage Paid Grab Me! I’m Free! Portsmouth, N.H. The Nation’s Oldest Newspaper™ • Editor: Steven Fowle • Founded 1756 by Daniel Fowle Vol. CCLXII, No. 9 Permit No. 75 PO Box 756, Portsmouth, NH 03802 • [email protected] • www.nhgazette.com Address Service Requested January 19, 2018

The Fortnightly Rant How We Lost The Same War Twice t’s coming. A week from next As the sprawling capitol of a klep- Wednesday it will be here. This tocratic puppet government which Itime we know it’s coming. But, was the successor to nearly a century we’re no more ready for the 50th of French colonial rule, Saigon be- anniversary of the Tet Offensive fore Tet was, quite naturally, deca- than we were for the real thing. dent and depraved. Its main streets Oh, the TV news people might were a seething mass of humani- have something prepared for the oc- ty, spilling over with city dwellers casion. They do those things in their and refugees from the countryside, sleep: a dramatic logo ginned up by flowing like some viscous liquid. For the graphics department, a few min- Vietnam, though, it was relatively utes worth of talking heads display- peaceful. Only occasionally would ing a simulacrum of deep concern a Honda-riding cowboy take a pot- while old footage runs behind them. shot with a pistol at a U.S. officer or Don’t expect much from the toss a grenade at some GI’s foolishly White House. If President Bone bunched up at a bus stop. Spur can let a whole day pass with- That city vanished in an instant on out mentioning a false alarm about the morning of January 31, 1968. a nuclear missile attack on Hawaii, If people remember Tet today, he’s hardly likely to have prepared they may recall that a small team any remarks commemorating a real of Viet Cong sappers breached the fight he dodged in his youth. outer wall of the U.S. Embassy and At the Pentagon, generals will be traded gunshots with diplomats. standing carefully on that part of the That was just the highlight reel, rug under which their predecessors though—one of half a dozen similar ry, and ARVN [South Vietnamese] Instead, we got Ronald Reagan. swept their deeds. attacks on particularly high profile troops to clear the city. As a WW II veteran of Hollywood As for the nation as a whole … targets across the city. Altogether, Through it all, General William in the direction of “win or get out.” sound stages, he despised the notion [cue the needle scratch]. Our apologies: Viet Cong from 35 battalions ap- Westmoreland, the U.S. Command- Tet, in effect, stamped a shelf-life that America’s military might be due to advanced age, we sometimes peared like mushrooms after rain er, didn’t skip a beat—his lying went on the illusion that perhaps some subject to constraint. forget that concepts familiar to us and turned much of Saigon into a on uninterrupted. Don North, an kind of victory was possible. Two After an attempt at rebranding may be quaint to others. Can we battlefield. ABC correspondent, wrote, “I was more waves of attacks in May pretty the Vietnam War as a “noble cause” pretend, though, for the purposes of At the same time, 400 miles away personally aware of General West- well sealed the deal. fell as flat as New Coke, The Gipper this essay, that such a phrase still has at the northern extremity of the moreland’s fabrications starting with It was during this period that tried a bank shot. Suddenly Vietnam some meaning? fictitious state, ten battalions of the his announcement at a Saigon news the carnage reached its peak, with veterans were his darlings. There are a number of reasons People’s Army captured the ancient, conference on Jan. 31, that Hué had hundreds of Americans dying every After a decade of being looked at why it is so hard to imagine this na- walled Imperial City of Hué, giving been recaptured and NVA soldiers week. That the war dragged on for askance, this often obstreperous co- tion uniting behind a meaningful them a nearly-impenetrable defen- forced out.” years was not an indication of public hort were being treated with a little commemoration of Tet—the day sible position. The North Vietnamese objective support, but a condemnation of our dignity. Some of them embraced that the truth of the Vietnam War In fact, the length and breadth of for the Tet Offensive had been to in- politics and our politicians. that change without question, rais- finally became undeniable. the country—which, according to spire a General Uprising throughout Once all the troops were home ing the possibility that their opinion Mainly, it’s because so much time a mountain of statistical data, had the South. By those terms it was a who were coming home, there was of the war improved a bit, too. and effort was put into making that been successfully “pacified” by half complete failure. It was probably the finally a broad consensus about the Civilians were taught to separate truth disappear. a million U.S. troops—was in utter most successful complete failure in war: let’s sure as hell not do that the war from the warrior. In prac- But, you may say, what about “the chaos. Altogether, 80,000 North military history, though. again. Polls taken in the late 70s and tice, the reconciliation was to some truth will out?” Vietnamese regulars and Viet Cong Several years of slowly escalating early 80s revealed that two-thirds degree a package deal. It’s not easy to Yes, yes, it will. had attacked 100 towns and cities. drip, drip, drip, had failed to impress to three-quarters of Americans be- “support the troops” while opposing When the day comes, a few hun- Intense fighting in Saigon last- upon Americans at home that, left lieved that the war had been a mis- the war to which they’re heading. dred old men will gather—they ed more than a week, and mop-up to its own devices, this war was go- take, wrong, immoral, or all of the For those who remember it, it’s know where—and they’ll tell the operations went on for a month. In ing to go on forever. As it turned out, above. It would have been a great sobering to think that a mistake— truth to each other. And even some Hué, it took a full month of all-out a sudden, dramatic bloodbath was time for a Truth and Reconciliation hell, a crime—so terrible could be of them will have it wrong. effort by the Marines, the 1st Caval- all it took to nudge public opinion Commission. papered over with lies and smiles.

The Alleged News® Battle of the Titans: the Stock Exchange vs. the Arc of Justice he New York Stock Exchange Trump supporters might argue acteristically silent during the 38 waii, the person currently holding value of the U.S. economy. After took Monday off, ostensibly that this is evidence of the Presi- minute period when the State of the office which formerly represent- all, the sky’s the limit, right? Who soT that Wall Street traders might dent’s . If he has that Hawaii was under an official warn- ed the de facto leadership of the Free knows how much prosperity they take time out to honor the life and magical ability, it operates in a mys- ing which said, “BALLISTIC MIS- World ignored the alarm. can create? Granted, 57 percent of works of Dr. Martin Luther King, terious way: it seems to work when SILE THREAT INBOUND TO Instead, he issued a tweet about Americans couldn’t currently cov- Jr. Perhaps we are unduly jaded, he does not. On average, every HAWAII. SEEK IMMEDIATE Fire and Fury, a new book by Mi- er an unexpected bill of $500. But, but we suspect that their wor- fourth day he has been in office, our SHELTER. THIS IS NOT A chael Wolff, which purports to re- eventually, if the stock market keeps ship of Mammon just continued Chief Executive has found the time DRILL.” (Innumerable critics have veal that West Wing insiders hold going up and up, sooner or later in other venues. Their religion no to play golf at one or another of his faulted Hawaiian officials for caus- approximately the same view of the something is bound to trickle down. longer requires any particular edi- various Versailles. ing unnecessary alarm; few seem to President’s abilities as do his most Capitalism is all about growth, fice, since capitalism, through glo- On Monday, for example—again, have noticed their sober restraint in outspoken critics. and there’s plenty of room to grow. balism, has made the whole world Martin Luther King Jr. Day—he eschewing the use of exclamation With our economy now based Companies we think of today as gi- into Mammon’s Temple. golfed at Mar-a-Lago while the points.) on consumption, and consumption ants are puny in historical perspec- The Dow-Jones Industrial Aver- Vice President and the Secretary At press time, we can report that based on consumer confidence, it tive. Combine the valuation of 20 of age has risen about 6,000 points over of the Interior laid a wreath at the Hawaii has not, to date, been at- seems pretty clear, one-quarter of our mightiest modern companies— the past year—1,000 points in the King memorial. Perhaps in light of tacked by any ICBMs. A technician the way through the Trump ad- including Apple, Google, Amazon, last week alone. According to our de his recent and blatantly racist re- in Hawaii appears to have acciden- ministration, that, to ensure a sound Walmart, and Exxon Mobil—and facto national religion free market mark about Haiti and Africa being tally selected the wrong item from economy, the President should you come up with $7.9 trillion. theory, then, the value of compa- “sh_tholes,” few saw fit to complain a two-item, pull-down menu on a spend the remaining three-quarters A single company was once worth nies traded on the Stock Exchange about his absence from a ceremony computer screen, as one does. of it at Mar-a-Lago, eating meatloaf that much, 380 years ago. has increased by about 23 percent honoring the civil rights leader. Despite his long-running and chocolate cake. during the alleged Presidency of Similarly, on Saturday, the Presi- feud with the number one suspect in Meanwhile, the Wall Street wiz- The Alleged News® Donald J. Trump, Jr. dent’s Twitter account was unchar- the event of an ICBM aimed at Ha- ards can continue driving up the to page two Page 2 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018

The Alleged News® that means it’s worth it, until it isn’t. from page one Its global hegemony notwith- standing, capitalism does have its True, tulips are no longer a pop- occasional critic. ular vehicle for investment. The For example, on Monday, CNN principle still holds, though: things had the gall to report that Martin are worth whatever people are will- Luther King, Jr. was a socialist— ing to pay for them. At least, until which, in fact, he was. As early as they’re not. July 18, 1952, he wrote to Coretta As the rising prices of old-fash- Scott, “I imagine you already know ioned stocks gladden the generally that I am much more socialistic in geriatric hearts of those who own my economic theory than capitalis- them, many tech-savvy Millenials, tic. And yet I am not so opposed to who apparently never heard of Tu- capitalism that I have failed to see its lipmania, are busily counting their relative merits. It started out with a Bitcoin chickens. noble and high motive, viz, to block One year ago a single Bitcoin was the trade monopolies of nobles; but, said to be worth $830. On Mon- like most human systems, it fell vic- day—Martin Luther King Jr. Day— tim to the very thing it was revolting that same invisible, electronic entity against. So today capitalism has out- was allegedly worth about $19,000. lived its usefulness. It has brought Why did its value increase by a about a system that takes necessities factor of 23? Capitalism, we sup- from the masses to give luxuries to pose. Thanks to the strength of the classes.” our all-volunteer armed forces, the What he wrote in private, King United States of America is able to also said in public. Speaking to the provide a safe space for a free market Negro American Labor Council in in which something is worth what- 1961, he said, “Call it democracy, ever a willing buyer will pay a willing or call it democratic socialism, but seller. there must be a better distribution ism caused considerable consterna- Ever Vigilant: The Flag Police responders and the American flag, You can argue with their choic- of wealth within this country for all tion among conservatives. Here they The Flag Police were saddened comes with ‘STAND’ laser-en- es all you want—tulips, electrons, God’s children.” had invested all those years in learn- but not surprised when a shuttle graved at the business end to ‘inspire whatever—but if they’ll pay for it, CNN’s mention of King’s social- ing to grudgingly accept the man, boat to an offshore Florida casino patriotism,’ the firearms manufac- if only on the surface. Now they’re burned to the waterline recently, turer says.” handed a legitimate reason to hate with the loss of one life. him, and they don’t know how to Any boat with a U.S. flag mount- handle it. It must be both infuriating ed on the bow is, ipso facto, a boat and confusing. being operated improperly. That may tempt liberals to feel a little bit smug. They might want to recall how, back in the day, Demo- crats turned their backs on Dr. King after he spoke on April 4, 1967 against the Vietnam War. –=≈=– Marketing blather on the man- Proof You’re In New England ufacturer’s website claims that by Last Saturday morning at 3:56 spending about $850 or so on this a.m., after a rather rigorous cold 9mm “special commemorative edi- spell lasting nearly a fortnight, the Meanwhile, closer to Precinct tion,” the customer will “Show … mercury made it all the way up to Headquarters, an enterprising New- unwavering support for the flag and 59° Fahrenheit (the scale by which ington gun manufacturer has found for America’s National Anthem.” all true Americans read the tem- a novel way to violate the Flag Code. Raffi, who goes by @nbanyk on Visible, material progress is being made at the Press Room, albeit in the perature). On Sunday, the Union Leader Twitter and says he lives in Hanover, form of destruction. It would be hard to say which project’s completion is The next morning it had dropped gleefully touted this development: N.H., took a somewhat less positive more anticipated: this venerable institution or the new Sarah Mildred to 0° by 6:56 a.m. “A new Sig Sauer handgun the view of the product: “Wow, a gun Long Bridge. We know where we stand: after all, there are other bridges. That is all. company says honors veterans, first made in retaliation for those who

Enjoy Outdoor Dining on our Patio! Don’t just give a gift. North River Woodworks Give a unique newspaper — Portsmouth, NH — (603) 682-4443 every other Friday for a year. Gift subscriptions - page 5. Local Craftsmanship

241 Hanover Street, Portsmouth, N.H. (603) 373-8981 — bubbysdeli.com Open 7 days a week from 8:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.

Cuba Sí! Where Memorable Meals Come Naturally. - Pay Trump no Heed - no matter what day of the week. You can travel to Cuba Join Witness for Peace March 30th - April 9th Applications due January 31st [email protected] Lafayette Plaza, Route 1, Portsmouth, 422-6758 • Mon - Sat 8am - 8pm, Sun 10am - 6pm The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018 — Page 3 kneel against oppression.” On Thursday, January 25th, Jeff Patrick Blanchfield was simi- Klein will present “Balfour at 100: A larly unimpressed, tweeting, “in so Century of Colonialism in the Mid- many words: ‘Sometimes you have dle East,” at the Portsmouth Public to Stand Your Ground against peo- Library, in the Levenson Room. ple who won’t Stand for what you According to the sponsors, Sea- want.’” coast Peace Response, Palestine Ed- As for the Flag Police, they’re ucation Network, and Water Justice busting Sig Sauer for violation of in Palestine, Klein has gathered a the Flag Code. wide range of resources and formed –=≈=– a revealing perspective on the 20th Balfour at 100 Century political Dynamics in Eu- On November 2, 1917, the Brit- rope that enabled the formation of ish government issued the Balfour Israel. His presentation helps form Declaration, a public statement an understanding of the way issues which said that “His Majesty’s gov- at play in the region today have ernment view with favour the estab- come to be and how tensions can be lishment in Palestine of a national reduced. home for the Jewish people … it be- The program will begin at 7:00 ing clearly understood that nothing p.m. For more information contact shall be done which may prejudice Sandra Yarne at skyarne@yahoo. the civil and religious rights of ex- com, or call (603) 446-2424 isting non-Jewish communities in –=≈=– Palestine … .” At that time, Jewish Another Victory at Sanders Poynt (sic?) people made up about five percent Rye resident Bob Jesurum is on Having defeated William “Bill” Class War Takes to the Airwaves richest man is intentionally silenc- of Palestine, which had been part of a roll, recently racking up another Binnie in an epic legal battle over The urge of the well-heeled to ap- ing the voice of our community, or the defunct Ottoman Empire. victory over one of the Seacoast’s public access to the beach at Lit- propriate that which belongs to the doing it accidentally as part of his Complications ensued. favorite trolls. tle Harbor, Jesurum again sued rest of us seems to know no bounds. overall effort to work his way up to the former plastic Recently it’s been manifesting itself 9th place, it would not be entirely coathanger magnate, on the local airwaves. outlandish to suggest the possibility seeking the resto- According to WSCA-LP board of revenge as a motive. At one time ration of the sign member Rick Pickford, the station’s both Bloomberg and Gregg were seen here. signal is being crushed by a transla- co-chairs of the plutocrat-friendly On January 13th, tor station in Amesbury owned by pressure group Fix the Debt. Gregg Jesurum sent out Bloomberg Radio. remains a co-chair [when he’s not this photo [severely Licensed by the FCC to operate busy knocking down the big bucks cropped by us] and at 106.1 on the FM dial, WSCA, at Goldman Sachs]. Bloomberg is the following mes- broadcasting since 2004, was created still a member. sage: “On a balmy in an act of defiance, according to its The problem has existed for January morning, on Wikipedia entry. years but was exacerbated when my usual walk, no- “Judd Gregg, then-senator and Bloomberg bought and powered-up ticed that the histor- former governor of New Hamp- a Boston antenna. That made ic marker has been shire, led the opposition to the U.S. WNBP, a local station, technical- temporarily restored. Federal Communications Com- ly untenable. The owner sold the They (the Town? or mission’s plans to license low-power Amesbury translator to Bloomberg, WBTSCC?) short- radio stations, most notably by spon- which promptly installed a far more ened the post in or- soring the Radio Broadcasting Pres- powerful antenna in Amesbury, the Once again on Sunday, despite temperatures around 20°, Market Square der to place it in a concrete bucket. ervation Act. Prometheus Technical one that’s causing the trouble. provided proof that, despite the efforts of certain parties, participatory de- I assume that they will replace the Director Pete Tridish said the group WSCA will soon be filing Listen- mocracy is not dead yet. Messages being conveyed included, “Strong Vot- post when they do a permanent res- ‘wanted to help build a station right er Complaint Forms for Signal In- ing Rights Protect Our Democracy;” “The Real Fraud: Voter Suppression toration. in the state of the man in the Senate, terference with the FCC. The form Laws, Gerrymandering, Electronic Ballots;” “Mr. Trump: White House “Thank you, Judge Wageling.” Senator Judd Gregg, who has done can be found online at wscafm.org/ Not = Whites Only;” “Humankind — Be Both — Save DACA;” “Mon- On behalf of our readers, thank the most to oppose community ra- signal/. ey Out Of Politics;” “Collusion With Russia — We Demand A Full & you, Mr. Jesurum. dio.’ Gregg’s senatorial challenger, This will take money. Send checks Impartial Investigation;” “Climate Change Just Ruined Your [image of Apparently the only battle re- Doris ‘Granny D’ Haddock, was to: WSCA, 909 Islington St., Ports- Trump] Tee Time;” “Black Lives Matter [four signs];” “Net Neutrality maining in the War of Sanders invited to speak at the barnraising.” mouth, N.H. Gone;” “Honk For Civil Rights;” Join Us Every Sunday For Civil Rights Poynt (sic?) is over how to spell the While it is impossible for us to If you can’t pick up a clear signal, Sundays;” “and “Womens March 2018 Jan 20th, 1-3 P.M.” name. Frankly, we’re confused. know whether the world’s 10th listen online at wscafm.org. Page 4 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018

Where Will We Be on December 31, 2018? high and loans to the poor through To the Editor: payday loans were at rates as high as With the major electronic and print five hundred percent and beyond. media journalism engaged in tabloid Many lost their homes to foreclosure. type journalism on the level of the old No new plants were built, no new National Enquirer, the New Hamp- workers were hired, and no new man- shire Gazette serves as an escape into ufacturing resulted. which would have further damaged the world of real journalism where real With Trump making major mis- our already tenuous relationship with problems are discussed and addressed. takes in foreign policy while abandon- the British Government, not to men- Furthermore, it is to their credit ing most of his platform in that regard tion his bigly sensitive ego. The Best of All Possible Tax Cuts that the writers do mention the Dem- and becoming a tool of the neocons we In another striking display of rac- To the Editor: increased spending to benefit workers ocrats as well as the Republicans for hope that a nuclear war is not in our ism and disgraceful behavior, during Americans could almost be excused all because of the Trump tax cuts. E.g., contributing to the sad state of affairs future. But, what is definitely in our fu- an immigration policy meeting with for believing the lie that the Trump AT&T promised $1,000 bonuses to in America. ture is an economic collapse brought Congressional leaders, Trump referred tax cuts would harm poor and middle over 200,000 employees and a new But, I do not agree with many of about by the policies of the Federal to certain African Nations and Haiti income Americans because Democrat $1,000,000,000 investment in the U.S. their conclusions with regard to the Reserve and I will venture to state that as “shithole” nations. Of course, in true politicians and the main stream media which will grow jobs. economy. The economic failures are 2018 is the year when it will occur. The Trump fashion, he has denied making have been lying about it so persistent- Democrat Nancy Pelosi called the not because of capitalism. The fail- bubbles in the stock market, the bond such comments, although they were ly, enthusiastically, and authoritatively. Trump tax cut “Armageddon,” which ures are because capitalism was re- market, the housing market, and Bit- verified by Senators Graham and But rational Americans have learned it should be for Democrats because placed by central planning that is now coin will collapse. This time there can Durbin. to question everything that Dem- all Democrat politicians voted against in the hands of The Federal Reserve, be no bailout. While Trump’s lies are bad enough, ocrats, including most of the main reducing taxes, against simplifying tax and as history has taught us no cen- Happy New Year. it is the behavior that necessitates his stream media, say. preparation, and against creating an trally planned economy has survived, John Dente lies that are is the larger problem. His The Trump tax cut will benefit poor economic environment that will pro- or produced the wealth that capitalist Wilmington, Del. lies continue to diminish any bit of and middle income Americans; even vide more and better jobs for Amer- economies have. John: credibility and trust people can place admits that about ican workers. The collapse of the economy in A Happy New Year to you, sir. We’re in anything Trump says, which alone 8 in every 10 Americans will see a tax Republicans want everyone to pros- 2008 would have destroyed the poli- grateful to have letter writers such as damages America However it is his cut next year. Working Americans per, to have challenging and reward- cies set in motion by Greenspan and yourself: unafraid of a robust dialogue. actions that continue to greatly harm should see the benefit in their Febru- ing jobs, and more enjoyable lives. But Bernacke which by decriminalizing The Editor America diplomatically, economically, ary paychecks. Only about five percent Democrat politicians’ power depends regulations permitted gigantic bubbles –=≈=– and politically on a global level. He of Americans, almost exclusively peo- on having millions of poor and de- to emerge in the housing markets, and The Longest Book Ever Written? has severely weakened our vital Trans ple with incomes in the top 10 to 15 pendent people; Democrat politicians’ with hedge funds. Had the banks and To the Editor: Atlantic Alliance, which has served percent, will have a tax increase. greed for power and wealth makes Wall Street not been bailed out to the Another week, and another chapter America and our allies well for over The standard deductions and child them vote against policies that help tune of billions of dollars the economy is added to the book; The Many (and seventy years. When the President tax credits are greatly increased. For people succeed and prosper. And that’s would have recovered on its own and Continuing) Lies of . The of the United States cannot make a many Americans, perhaps millions, tax why only Republican Senators and capital markets would have returned way things are going, this book may be friendly visit to England, our longest preparation will be greatly simplified Congressmen voted for the Trump to more rational price discovery. the longest ever written. and strongest ally, something very se- so they will save hours of labor and tax cuts, the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act The bailouts by the Federal Reserve Mr. Trump has cancelled his rious is happening. When you alienate frustration and can avoid hiring tax of 2017 that President Trump signed amounted to printing and funneling planned visit to England, blaming many African nations with racist and preparation help. before Christmas, which have already money to the same criminals and the cancellation on President Obama derogatory comments, you weaken The corporate tax changes should be begun making Americans more pros- scoundrels that caused the crash. Fur- and the location of the new American our economic and political leverage in even more beneficial than the personal perous, making their lives more enjoy- thermore, artificially low interest rates Embassy in London. The fact that those nations. As a result, China will income tax changes; they improve the able, and making their futures brighter. re- inflated the bubbles in the housing, President George W. Bush made the gain increased economic leverage and U.S. business environment, slowing or Don Ewing financial, and bond markets to a level decision to move the embassy in 2008 power in Africa, taking full advantage stopping the movement of jobs over- Meredith, N.H. beyond that of the 2008 crash. In es- was never mentioned by Trump. The of Trump’s ignorance. seas, instigating a new wave of foreign Don: sence it amounted to transferring bil- fact that Trump has totally alienat- Stay tuned next week for another and domestic investment in the U.S., Your letters are like gold to us. Just as lions of dollars of zero interest money ed the English with his actions, and parade of lies, denials, and embarrass- increasing profits which benefit inves- gold is nearly impervious to chemical as- to privileged borrowers. This money was very unwelcome by the people ments from Mr. Trump to add to our tors and worker retirement plans, and sault, your letters appear impervious to funded the carry trade and was used of England was the real reason. The rapidly expanding manuscript. most importantly by creating more facts. Gold is dense, soft, malleable, and for leveraged buy outs and ultimate Prime Minister condemned Trump’s Rich DiPentima and better jobs for U.S. workers. ductile; thus, it can assume almost any destruction of companies and their re-tweeting some inflammatory an- Portsmouth, N.H. Democrat Senator Schumer said shape imaginable. Likewise your letters labor force. In addition it permitted ti-Muslim video’s, and he was further Rich: the corporate benefits will only go to can twist reason into the most improbable stock buybacks that artificially drove criticized for the derogatory com- With luck, the publisher of the putative the CEOs and not to workers, but he shapes, to provide support for the Right the stock market to extreme values ments he made about the Mayor of book to which you refer will have reason lies. Already many companies, even Wing’s looniest positions. with most stocks ending up in the London following a terrorist attack to cancel its publication. before getting the benefit from the tax Perhaps a few lower-income earners portfolios of the company executives. there. Trump knew he would have The Editor cuts, have promised bonuses, increased may see some slight shaving of their tax Meanwhile, credit card rates stayed faced large crowds protesting his visit –=≈=– wages, increased investment, and other obligations. Those are bought at the cost of

Spreading Truth, Humor, and Love Don’t just give a gift. Give a unique newspaper — The Devil’s Post every other Friday for a year. On your laptop at: Gift subscriptions - page 5. 163 Islington St ≈ 436-7330 TheDevilsPost.org

Acupuncture, Cranial Sacral Therapy, JACKSON’S HARDWARE Murph’s Fortnightly Quote & Shiatsu 56 Route One Bypass Kittery, Maine “The f irst duty of a newspaper 207.439.1133 is to be accurate. If it be accurate, it follows that it is fair.” — Herbert Bayard Swope (1882-1958) Pam Bailey (603) 828-6759 100 YEARS STRONG editor, journalist

Not Your Gather, Everyday Relax, The New Hampshire Mexican Unwind Gazette is the most economical Cuisine advertising medium on the Seacoast. This space is available for just sixteen 37 Bow Street Portsmouth, NH 2 Ceres Street Portsmouth, NH dollars. To learn more, (603) 431-5967 (603) 433-2373 call (603) 433-9898, or e-mail www.pocosnh.com www.twoceresstreet.com [email protected]. The New Hampshire Gazette, January 19, 2018 — Page 5

for the lobbyists. Needless to say, these ads are de- I wish I could offer some encour- structive, unless you happen to be in agment for readers, in the face of the business of manufacturing and around 100 folk still succumbing to selling guns. And, they’re destructive this scourge daily. I can only say that unless you’re in the business of selling I strongly advocate education over in- the NRA’s $850 “Carry Guard” pro- 2015. carceration in the almost 40-years-un- gram. Carry Guard teaches America’s The bleak news was that over successful “war on drugs.” Educating legions of the paranoid how to use 200,000 lost lives were caused by opi- school children about the mechanisms their guns properly while wallowing and overdose deaths as the Food and oid drugs up to and including 2016 of opioid dependence and withdrawal in a sea of angry liberals, corrupt of- huge gifts to the “deserving rich,” thereby Drug Administration (FDA) ap- that never should have been green should go a long way to dissuade them ficials, and marauding demonstrators. starving the government of desperate- proved an opioid drug that was unjust- lighted for wide-spread use. These from considering opioids. Finally, opi- If you pass the course, you even qualify ly needed funds which would otherwise ly marketed to doctors as a relatively death were deemed to be grossly un- oids need to regain the stigma they to purchase liability insurance to cover have enriched the lives of all. “safe” pain reliever—OxyContin. A derestimated by the Centers for Dis- had in the 1960/1970s, but this time any damage you might cause. The Editor revolving door between pharmaceu- ease Control and Prevention (CDC). the blame must be squarely affixed The Department of Homeland Se- –=≈=– tical companies and the FDA is/was Victims range from small town and onto the culprits. curity tells us: “If you see something, Tweets of the POTUS taking place, which was duly exposed suburban young people, moms and Michael Kulla, Ph.D. say something.” The NRA tells us: “If To the Editor: by Life Extension magazine in the dads, to celebrities like the musician Poughkeepsie, N.Y. you see something, shoot it.” They’ll Sometimes they are ridiculous, 1980s and more recently by the Wash- Prince to the actor, Philip Seymour –=≈=– even instruct you on how to get away sometimes self-contradictory. Some- ington Post and 60 Minutes. Hoffman. Left behind are shattered Frog Horn with it, and sell you liability insurance times they are dishonest, sometimes The FDA reviewed Perdue Phar- lives and broken families in the worst To the Editor: in the event you don’t! dangerously provocative. Rants of a ma’s clinical studies on OxyContin, narcotic crisis in American history. The propaganda mill at the NRA America—what a country! cranky angryman, the tweets of the a highly addictive opioid drug, and When a person takes these danger- has taken a giant leap forward with a Rick Littlefield POTUS are not government policy. approved it. The FDA was told that ous drugs, it quickly fills opioid recep- series of highly provocative video ads Barrington, N.H. Policy goes through official govern- OxyContin, which is similar in struc- tors in the brain, relieving pain and designed to escalate division and revo- Rick: ment channels. POTUS tweets are ture and function to heroin and other inducing calmness and euphoria in lutionary fervor. Thanks for the analysis. On some topics, denied or dismissed by the White opioids, was a time-release tablet and many. Continued opioid use desensi- I recommend doing a Google our brain just freezes up. House spokesperson whenever they this posed a lower threat of abuse and tizes these receptors, often necessitat- search for “NRA ads” to check these The Editor are challenged or criticized. addiction. As a result, the groundwork ing stronger doses. ads out. You’ll likely find some of them –=≈=– The media does disservice to the was layed by the federal government’s Some of the opioid receptors can exceptionally chilling because they ap- This Year in Jerusalem country when it gives POTUS tweets inefficient and inept oversight. become re-sensitized within days or pear to invite neighbor-on-neighbor To the editor: attention and reports them as news. Upon approval of OxyContin, Per- weeks after detox, enabling the opi- violence between Main Street Amer- I never fully understood the plight They are word noise, nothing more. due Pharma aggressively and fraud- oid user to regain a sense of normal- icans—echoes of life in Germany and of the Jews in Israel until I heard Ed Bruce Joffe ulently targeted primary care doctors cy. More often though, profound and Italy in a bygone day. Koch, the former mayor of New York Piedmont, Calif. because they had little training in se- long-lasting changes occur in the brain For example, in one ad, alt-right City, spell it out on a talk radio show. Bruce: vere pain management or in recogniz- with dire consequences. Restless- hate-radio host and NRA spokes- Koch simply said, “Israel is surrounded Would that Trump communicated only ing signs of drug abuse. Next, Perdue ness and intense agitation along with person proclaims that by millions of people who want to kill by tweet, and that all said tweets were Pharma promoted the idea that it was physical and mental cravings for a “fix” America’s true patriots are under as- them.” universally ignored. an acceptable solution for almost any eventuates which can ignite another sault by corrupt government officials Tragically, Jerusalem is once again at The Editor type of pain. Consequently, we wit- vicious addiction cycle. Tragically, 90 and free-loading liberals who are out the center of political and internation- –=≈=– nessed skyrocketing rates of addiction percent of those in recovery experi- to steal their lunch. Moreover, ever al debate. Dr. Kulla on Opioids, Part Deux which has severely worsened in recent ence relapse. The final exit for many is since Hillary lost the election, these Nobel prize-winning author and To the Editor: years. recovery or death. members of “the resistance” have Holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel can This is my second article on opioids. Eventually, Purdue Pharma and In 2017, several states sued phar- grown blind with and will stop tell you about Jerusalem and what it The first one pertained to older adults three executives pleaded guilty to maceutical companies for downplay- at nothing to get revenge. They are means to the Jewish people. Wiesel and appeared on July 23, 2017. criminal charges for intentionally ly- ing the dangers of opioids and for violent, dangerous, and must be sup- said, “Jerusalem is above politics. It Back in the 1960’s society viewed ing about the addictive risks of Oxy- deceptive marketing. These states have pressed with an iron fist. is mentioned more than six hundred heroin (opioid) junkies with disdain. Contin. They were charged with $634 come up against an entrenched and It’s been said, if you place a frog in times in Scripture—and not a single Film footage depicted addicts cook- million in fines. The executives respon- highly powerful pharmaceutical lobby a pot of water and heat it up gradually, time in the Koran. Its presence in ing heroin in a rusty spoon and using sible received no prison time and the that roll back laws that make it easier the frog will never notice he’s being Jewish history is overwhelming. There dirty needles to inject in their quiver- company was allowed to continue sell- to overprescribe, increase distribution cooked. Alt-right propaganda such as is no more moving prayer in Jewish ing bodies. High school students were ing different versions of OxyContin and be more charitable to manufac- this works much the same way. Little history than the one expressing our shown films of heroin addicts strapped containing drugs, including fentanyl turers and distributors in regard to by little, things that were once un- yearning to return to Jerusalem. To to gurneys twisting in agony as they (much more powerful than heroin), accountability. thinkable and extreme become plau- many theologians, it is Jewish history. went through the rigors of withdrawal. which tore through American com- A few parents and activists have sible. Perhaps it’s no mistake that a Fast forward to the early 1990s. munities with increased fatalities by tried to inject some sense into opioid frog is the official mascot of America’s Hate Mail, &c. There was a resurgence of addiction 72 percent in a single year from 2014 laws, but tragically, they are no match movement. to page six

Discover Portsmouth We design. History, Arts, & Culture! We print. New Hampshire Gazette Subscriptions Seacoast Sculpture exhibition, We print your design. 26 Fortnightly Issues, Now Mailed First Class walking tours, museum shop p P Mail this form with your check for $25 to: New Hampshire Gazette, PO Box 756, Portsmouth, NH 03802. Please print clearly. Offer good in U.S. only. DIGITAL / OFFSET / LETTERPRESS n phineasgraphics.com Portsmouth Historical Society, est. 1917 Supporting Subscribers Only: Please Check Box at Right: Supporting 10 Middle Street Portsmouth 603-436-4402 / 108 Penhallow (Supporting Subscribers pay the standard $25/yr, but make their open daily 9:30-5 p.m. in historic downtown Portsmouth money go twice as far for us by picking up their own papers (603) 436-8433 Portsmouthhistory.org phineas at one of our many convenient locations.) Subscriber

First Name: Sometimes Old is Good

The Fechheimer Building, one of the fin- Last Name: est examples of a cast-iron facade in Port- land, Oregon, was built in 1885. Listed in A Constantly-Changing Selection the National Register of Historic Places, Street Address: of it was restored in 1981 by Russell Fellows New & Used Books Properties, the principals of which enjoy a in both subscription to this newspaper. Town, City, or Burg: Hard Cover & Paperback Your Coffee, Ice Cream, Children & Pets Are All Welcome State: Zip Code: + 4: Store Hours Mon - Sat: 9 a.m. - 7 p.m. Sun: 10 a.m. - 7 p.m. Gift Of: (Where Applicable) Page 6 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018

The Northcountry Chronicle Reenacting 1960 by William Marvel work, afterward tossing it on the little interest from my father when primary virtue. In his world one did foreign. Within the family the po- other side of the kitchen table for my I brought it up at the dinner table. for himself and his own, while char- tential conflict slept unnoticed. My y mother was the liber- mother, who mostly used it to line Only after I tried for the ump- ity seemed healthiest as a personal mother indicated what she wanted, al in our house. She was the birdcage. She would leave the teenth time to initiate a discussion undertaking directed at a known and my father provided as much Mborn into a working-class Irish Globe on his side of the table, and he about Kennedy’s career as a PT boat and acute individual need; with as circumstances allowed, but nei- family that voted Democratic at would throw it in the kindling box. commander did my father finally increasing volume and regularity, ther seemed to demand anything least from the end of the Popu- Early recollections of them dis- respond—merely mentioning that benevolence bred nothing but de- that would have been obnoxious to list movement of the 1890s. Her cussing political topics involved jo- Nixon had been in the Navy, too. pendence and ingratitude. Govern- the other. Only in the hypothetical brothers had all belonged to rail- vial repartee about Adlai Stevenson “Sort of,” mumbled my mother, ment was something for which the discourse of a turbulent presidential road or industrial unions. It was and Dwight Eisenhower, but that after which we resumed eating in citizen took a minor but important campaign did their dueling visions because of her that the Boston disappeared in 1960. The disparity silence. responsibility, and it was meant to collide, and in that artificially antag- Globe started coming to the house between the Globe and the Union There was a lot of silence that year, provide a very few specific functions. onistic forum the system of mutual in 1960. Leader was not then apparent to me. interspersed with brief but sharp My mother grew up in a large tolerance and accommodation broke My father’s ancestors, meanwhile, I knew only that two men were vy- snarls. That was unusual, for the family amid urban anonymity, where down. The election of 1960 seemed had been Democrats in Delaware ing for the White House, and one dinner hour usually passed with my local political institutions perennial- the worst example of that phenom- when that was the conservative par- of them was Irish, which was always father telling stories about people he ly served as a communal safeguard enon to me because it was the first ty, long before the Civil War. My considered a good recommendation worked with, or characters around against misfortune and want. Gov- time I detected a serious rift in my grandfather carried those inherited in my family. He came from Mas- town. My mother was always pret- ernment was an external entity universe. principles of self-sufficiency with sachusetts, which had not yet begun ty voluble, too, recounting the news meant for the protection of the peo- In the exaggerated angst of him when he left the family farm in to flood my town with high-main- she had received in letters from ple individually, and from which one pre-adolescence I imagined the southern Delaware to work his way tenance colonists, and like my father her siblings and faraway friends, or expected frequent assistance and a family falling apart over it, and through college and medical school, he was a Navy veteran of the Pacific from her weekly trips to the grocery wide variety of public services. The watching my world crumble. That and he passed his political tenets War, so I favored him. stores. Evenings grew so still that I water in one’s coffee, the means of didn’t happen, but the convivial on to his sons. They both pursued My mother did, too, but my father feared we might be suffering from getting oneself to work—or even political repartee that regulated po- careers in the Navy, which only re- did not. I don’t know if he actually financial difficulties again. the work itself—were provided by tential discord never resurfaced. The inforced the conservative doctrine liked Nixon, or would have preferred Decades passed before I deduced one or another of many municipal humorless, rancorous, demanding they had learned at home. another Republican, but it quickly the dynamics of that domestic chill. departments. Sometimes so was the constituencies of today evoke mem- It was because of my father that became clear that he did not share Two barely compatible perspectives housing in which one lived. ories of those contentious months we got a subscription to the Union the Globe’s enthusiasm for Jack Ken- on the world had thrown their des- My parents’ personal experienc- in 1960, again suggesting the pos- Leader—about the same time the nedy. I do know that my momentary tinies together. My father was raised es confirmed divergent worldviews sibility of catastrophic institutional Globe began to show up. He would obsession with Kennedy’s exploits in harsh and unforgiving rural sur- that molded their contradictory dissolution. read it when he got home from in the Pacific elicited surprisingly roundings that made self-reliance a opinions on politics domestic and –=≈=– from page five cial Security, Medicare and the safe- It belongs to the Jewish people and ty net to pay for the deficit the GOP is much more than a city … “Jerusa- has deliberately created with their lem is the heart of our heart, the soul tax scam bill for the wealthy. of our soul.” such policies are bad. Better to be two- was already the recipient of Social Before even thinking about it, Let Jerusalem be the capital of faced, though, than to ram a bigoted lation against one hundred percent Security as a teen when his father Ryan had best heed the admonish- Israel. and destructive policy down the world’s of the hazards and vicissitudes of passed away. Ryan was actually able ment of his conservative folk hero, Let Jerusalem be the place where throat—to borrow a metaphor of life, but we have tried to frame a law to use his Social Security benefits to former President Ronald Reagan, all faiths will be welcome to come which the Right Wing can’t get enough. which will give some measure of fully pay for his education at Miami who, in a 1984 presidential debate, and pray in peace. The Editor protection to the average citizen and University (a double major in eco- debunked Ryan’s lie with his pro- John Meinhold –=≈=– to his family against the loss of a job nomics and political science, leading nouncement: “Social Security, let’s Portsmouth, N.H. Hey Ryan: Hands Off Social Security! and against poverty-ridden old age.” to a permanent job in the govern- lay it to rest once and for all … So- John: To the Editor: Social Security, despite GOP ment he claims to disdain). cial Security has nothing to do with As soon as you grant one people the When President Franklin [D.] manufactured myths and lies, has Instead of showing gratitude for the deficit. Social Security is totally right to something because their religion Roosevelt signed the Social Securi- been an extremely successful gov- the program that helped him and funded by the payroll tax levied on says it’s theirs, you open the floodgate. ty Act into law in 1935, he proudly ernment program for 83 years. ensuring the program’s future viabil- employer and employee. If you re- For decades, the U.S. has had a two- proclaimed, “We can never insure Current Speaker of the House Paul ity, Speaker Ryan has made it clear duce the outgo of Social Security, faced policy on this issue. In general, one hundred percent of the popu- Ryan can attest to what I say as he that the GOP will be targeting So- that money would not go into the

The New Hampshire Gazette The Nation’s Oldest Newspaper™ Published Fortnightly on Alternate Fridays Founder: Daniel Fowle (1715 – 1787) Mike Dater’s Enslaved Pressman: Primus X (ca. 1700 – 1793) cartoon originals PO Box 756, Portsmouth, NH 03802 and other drawings by the New Hampshire Gazette’s www.nhgazette.com • [email protected] very own (603) 433-9898 starving artiste Subscriptions: $25 per year for 26 issues www.MikeDater.com Mailed First Class See Page Five for Subscription Form

Editor: Steven Fowle • Starving Artiste: Michael Dater Business (Such As It Is) Manager: Rose Eppard Columnist: William Marvel • 100 Proof Department: Rose Eppard, Marcia Jebb, and Allen McGee; Jane Porter, Emerita • Freelance Instigator & Unindicted Co-conspirators: Win Rhoades & Jack Cleary • Distributor: New England Distribution Network • Downtown Distribution Volunteers: Megan “Moonbeam” Stelzer, Murph, Jon Wyckoff, David Drymon, & Bob Halperin • Subscription Fulfillment: Sally Strazdins, Gail Drobnyk, Pat Day, Rose Eppard, Sharon Churchill & Jan Marx The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018 — Page 7

Why are we giving corporate welfare to Amazon? by Jim Hightower ly witnessing the most disgusting Uber-rich Amazon doesn’t need duce its operational costs, tax breaks, porate spoils, Amazon brands itself spectacle yet of the -corpo- and certainly doesn’t deserve any relocation grants for executives and a common thief, not only taking our sn’t it funny that right-wing rate cabal extracting money from public handout, but officials in 238 workforce, reduced utility bills, and money, but also stealing our trust in politicians across the country the People’s wallets to enrich them- cities have prostrated themselves … oh yeah, also give us first-rate the fairness of the system and wid- Ipiously rant against giving a few selves. Amazon.com, the $136-bil- in front of this Amazonian welfare schools and an educated labor pool. ening inequality in our society. bucks worth of jobless benefits lion-a-year internet colossus, has queen in embarrassing bids to win As one analyst of Amazon’s brib- To help stop this corruption, go to to the needy, then turn around haughtily initiated a sleazy, self-serv- her nod. Amazon’s arrogant exec- ery scheme noted, “these incentives GoodJobsFirst.org. and shove billions of our tax dol- ing public bidding war over where it utives even sent out a list of basic aren’t free. There’s no fairy godmoth- –=≈=– lars into corporate welfare for the will locate its new corporate head- benefits they expect every appli- er paying for them.” The typical re- Copyright 2017 by Jim Hightower greedy? quarters. The city and state that offer cant to deliver, including a “busi- sult of corporate giveaways is that & Associates. Contact Laura Ehrlich You’re right — it’s not funny, but the most bribe money to this private ness-friendly environment and tax they cost the public more than we ([email protected]) for more here we go again. We’re present- enterprise will be “The Winner.” structure,” free land, a subsidy to re- get back. By demanding such cor- information. from page six who have been working on this for general fund to reduce the deficit. months believed him. They nego- It would go into the Social Securi- tiated an agreement that took into ty trust fund. So Social Security has account the President’s concerns nothing to do with balancing the I’ve found my people!” and Fury describes Mr. Trump as and came back to the White House budget or erasing or lowering the The Editor matter when evaluating behavior being “less a person than a collec- to explain their agreement. That is deficit.” –=≈=– as was clearly proven in attempts tion of terrible traits.” I envision when they discovered Mr. Trump Let’s ask Congresswoman Franken the Scapegoat to implement zero tolerance pol- this nightmarish amorphous or- had no intention of abiding by his Shea-Porter to instruct Ryan and To the Editor: icies during the war on drugs and ange blob populated by improper- words from the day before. That is the GOP to keep their naughty Al Franken resigned from the the attempt to eliminate dangerous ly-placed commas and semicolons, when he asked why the country was mitts off our Social Security. Senate on January 2nd, victim of weapons from schools. Democratic and misspellings with dangling cen- allowing immigrants from coun- Wayne H. Merritt a cynical inquisition conducted leadership is well aware of this even tipedal legs running amuck up and tries with people of color instead Dover, N.H. by Democratic colleagues, New if their more fanatic followers are down, and tiny skinny stick-figure of countries like Norway, meaning Wayne: Hampshire’s Maggie Hassan in- not. Franken was a good man made barbarians mischievously thrusting blond haired, blue-eyed Aryan im- Thank you for bringing up the details cluded. Accused of sexual indiscre- a sacrificial lamb, part of a cynical sparkling spears at no one in par- migrants. of Speaker Ryan’s hypocrisy—a subject tions committed several years before strategy to gain separation from a ticular—all held loosely together by This must be Trump’s idea of we have previously found too revolting he entered the Senate, Franken Republican party that now owns oozing fat cells and a desiccated ivy treating immigrants with love. It to fully grapple with. expressed remorse and volunteered the egregious sexual improprieties matrix. certainly is not an example of sup- Immersed in it now, we wonder to appear before an inquiry of the of Donald Trump and Roy Moore. William Trently porting bipartisan agreements. This if there isn’t a pattern to be discerned Senate’s Ethics Committee. Instead, Democrats may gain traction Stratham, N.H. was not only a display of classic here. Every few weeks, it seems, some Senate Dems chose to deny Franken with this strategy with their disci- William: racism, it also was a public warning scientist or other comes out with a due process and forced his immedi- ples among the coastal elites but it Thanks for that vivid image—we to any country that might think of new study that seems to shed light on ate resignation. will not provide a solution to the think. negotiating a treaty with us that this the roots of conservatism: the size of a Franken’s indiscretions are more fundamental problem of the abuse The Editor President cannot be trusted from person’s amygdala, how a person re- akin to adolescent misbehaviors of power in institutional hierarchies. –=≈=– one day to the next. sponds to disgusting images, &c., &c. than the sordid predations of Har- Nor is it likely to bear fruit in the Mr. Unreliable Such erratic behavior sends a Meanwhile, we’ve been noticing since vey Weinstein and others. Dem- Heartland where the Democrats To the Editor: message to our allies that they practically forever that there seems to be ocrats, however, chose to wrap have been regarded with skepticism President Trump tried to prove should not depend on this country some sort of correlation between conser- themselves in a dubious mantle of and contempt. Until Democratic he was qualified to be president by for anything as long as he is in of- vatism and hypocrisy. sexual purity and declared a zero leadership formulates a strategy that inviting the press to a meeting with fice. That matters as this country is We now begin to wonder whether tolerance policy for alleged sexual addresses the economic concerns of Members of Congress to discuss dependent upon them as well. If we we’ve been looking at it backwards. improprieties thereby equating the the working class, they should not be immigration and fixing the status want sanctions against North Korea, What if, instead of conservatives just behavior of Franken with Wein- so confidently counting their gains of the Dreamers under DACA. He access to bases in Turkey or intelli- having a more-pronounced-than-av- stein’s rapacious acts. in the midterm 2018 elections. stated that immigration should be gence about the Taliban in Pakistan erage tolerance for hypocrisy, it’s the Nobody can condone rape or vi- Robert D. Russell, Ph.D. about love and that he would sign we have to prove our government other way around? olent acts of sexual aggression but Harrisburg, Pa. legislation if both parties came to an can be trusted. President Trump is What if people who are hypocrites a zero tolerance policy that equates –=≈=– agreement on immigration even if proving that we cannot. at heart are for some reason drawn to rape with a clumsy kiss at the office Fire and Fury he did not like it. He said he would Walter Hamilton conservatism? Sort of like, “All my life holiday party is a zero intelligence To the Editor: take the heat from his base to do so. Portsmouth N.H. I’ve known I was two-faced—now policy. Context and motive always One of my favorite lines in Fire A bipartisan group of Senators –=≈=–

Colin A. McGee Enrolled Agent Expert tax preparation, consultation and representation for businesses and individuals 51 Penhallow Street, Portsmouth, NH 603 436 6518 Open 7 days! (603) 436-0707 • [email protected] Check our website for today’s specials! www.ceresbakery.com

HomeView Inc. Instant Maine Sales TAX REFUND!* Professional Property Inspections *N.H. Residents Only. Present this ad at appointment. Expert Service — All Makes & Models Timothy D. Rooney, President Madore (603) 770-0444 Electric (800) 836-2438 Residential & Commercial Wiring Service 9 Free Loaners! www.homeviewnh.com Serving the Seacoast since 1980 [email protected] Licensed in Maine, Massachusetts, & New Hampshire (603) 430-4500 [email protected] N.H. Lic. # 0027; Mass. Lic. # 420 Sid Madore (603) 234-9996 The Seacoast’s most trusted service for 41 years. ASHI Lic. #112597 107 Government St., Kittery

The Quality Gifts New Hampshire Gazette Come Get ‘em & is the most economical Have Fun Doing It! advertising medium on the Seacoast. This space is available for just sixteen dollars. To learn more, call (603) 433-9898, or e-mail Alternative Clothing & Goods [email protected]. 33 Vaughan Mall • Portsmouth, NH 03801 • (603) 431-2243 Page 8 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, January 19, 2018 Admiral Fowle’s Piscataqua River Tidal Guide (Not for Navigational Purposes)

Portsmouth, arguably the first whom you choose to believe. drags about seventeen billion moves from the mouth of the Twice a day, too, the moon lets all Badger’s Island, bobbing around in and bridges work their hardest. town in this country not founded The Piscataqua’s ferocious current gallons of seawater — enough to river, up past New Castle, around that water go. All the seawater that the current. It weighs several tons, Ships coming in laden with coal, by religious extremists, is bounded is caused by the tide, which, in fill 2,125,000 tanker trucks — up the bend by the old Naval Prison, just fought its way upstream goes and it bobs and bounces in the oil, and salt do so at high tide, for on the north and east by the turn, is caused by the moon. The the river and into Great Bay. This under Memorial Bridge, past the back home to the ocean. This is current like a cork. more clearance under their keels. Piscataqua River, the second, third, other player is a vast sunken valley creates a roving hydraulic conflict, tugboats, and on into Great Bay. when the Piscataqua earns its title The river also has its placid mo- They leave empty, riding high in or fourth fastest-flowing navigable — Great Bay — about ten miles as incoming sea and the outgoing This can best be seen when the tide for xth fastest current. Look for the ments, around high and low tides. the water, at low tide, to squeeze river in the country, depending on upriver. Twice a day, the moon river collide. The skirmish line is rising. red buoy, at the upstream end of When the river rests, its tugboats under Memorial Bridge. Sunday, January 21 Monday, January 22 Tuesday, January 23 Wednesday, January 24 Thursday, January 25 Friday, January 26 Saturday, January 27

2001—TheNew York Times, ignoring 2008—The Center for Public In- 2005—Iraq Defense Minister Hazim 2015—The winter’s first snow falls in 2005—Conservative columnist Mag- 2015—Two more feet of snow fall on 2016—Inhabitants of Lindhurst, 20,000 jeering demonstrators, reports tegrity documents 935 instances of al-Shaalan is confirmed as a suspect Portsmouth. It won’t be the last. gie Gallagher admits taking $21,500 Portsmouth. New York are startled when a Robin- George W.[MD] Bush’s inauguration “orchestrated deception” by President in the disappearance of $300 million. 2001—GOP hack Rich Galen re- from the government for plugging 2006—On Sunset Blvd., Joaquin son R22 crash lands, on its side, in the may bring a “new era of … social jus- George W.[MD] Bush and seven top 2004—“[T]he illiteracy level of our ports (falsely) that outgoing Gore Bush Administration proposals. Phoenix is rescued from his rolled, middle of an intersection in a dense- tice.” officials leading up to the Iraq War. children are appalling,” says George staffers slashed all the power cords in 2004—Senator John McCain con- gas-reeking car by Werner Herzog. ly-populated residential area. Mirac- 2000—“When I was coming up,” says 2005—Donald Rumsfeld cancels an W.[MD] Bush. the Office of the Vice President. firms to Vermin Supreme that Karl 2006—The Energy Department ad- ulously, no one is killed. George W.[MD] Bush, “it was a dan- appearance in Germany to avoid a 2001—The LA Times reports that 1999—Joe DiMaggio, watching Rove dynamited the Old Man of mits its rent-a-cops at the Oak Ridge 2015—It snows so hard in Ports- gerous world, and you knew exactly possible arrest for war crimes. “W” keys are missing from White “Dateline NBC,” is disturbed to read the Mountain “in a fit of anger” over nuclear site have been cheating on mouth that mail carriers fail to make who they were. It was us vs. them, and 1997—Lottie Williams, walking in House computers. It’s not true. in the “crawl” that he has died. McCain’s defeat of George W.[MD] antiterrorism drills for up to 20 years. their appointed rounds. it was clear who them was.” a Tulsa park, takes a glancing blow 2000—Campaigning for President in 1992—Gov. Bill Clinton flies to Ar- Bush in the 2000 New Hampshire 2005—Gay hustler and accredited 2008—The NSA warns that a mal- 1997—Newt Gingrich becomes the on the shoulder from a small falling Salem, N.H., John McCain tells re- kansas so the execution of self-lobot- Presidential Primary. White House correspondent Jeff functioning, bus-size spy satellite will first Speaker of the House to be disci- chunk of a Delta rocket. porters, “I would never do this again.” omized cop-killer Ricky Ray Rector 2002—Veep Dick “Dick” Cheney Gannon asks Pres. G.W.[MD] Bush fall out of orbit soon. plined for unethical behavior. 1987—Pennsylvania Treasurer Budd 1992—The Star publishes Gennifer — who asks jailers to save the dessert asks Sen. Majority Leader Tom how he can work with insane people 2005—Veep Dick “Dick” Cheney 1996—Bill and Monica enjoy their Dwyer, charged with fraud, blows his Flowers’ allegation that she had a 12- from his last meal “for later” — will Daschle to limit investigations into like Harry Reid and Hillary Clinton. wears a down parka and ski cap to an fifth illicit encounter. brains out on live TV. year affair with Bill Clinton. enhance his campaign for President. the events of 9/11. 2001—Britain’s Guardian reports Auschwitz memorial ceremony. 1981—National Security Advisor 1973—The Supreme Court issues its 1986—In a mixup, half a ton of ura- 1978—A Soviet satellite powered 1996—Billy Bailey, the 19th of 23 [falsely] that Air Force One was 2005—Salon reveals that hack writ- Dick Allen does Nancy Reagan a fa- Roe v. Wade decision. nium is pumped into the sea at Wind- by a nuclear reactor crashes on Great children raised in a two-room shack, “stripped bare” in “an orgy of pilfer- er Michael McManus has been paid vor, intercepting gifts from a Japanese 1967—Salvadorans protest against scale, England. Slave Lake in Canada, contaminating is hanged by the State of Delaware, the ing” by outgoing Clinton staffers. $10,000 to promote Bush programs. reporter the law prohibits her from state violence in Managua; govern- 1973—Richard Nixon claims his 61,000 sq. mi. of ice. last American to go that way. 1998—The Project for a New Amer- 2000—“I know how hard it is for accepting. She repays the favor by ment troops kill 200. “peace with honor” deal with Ho does 1972—“It is with much embarrass- 1995—Due to a missed message ican Century sends a letter, signed by you to put food on your family,” says exploiting that act to get Allen fired. 1959—Ordered illegally to dig coal not betray our allies, abandon our ment that I have returned alive,” says warning of a test rocket flight, notori- E. Abrams, J. Bolton, W. Kristol, R. George W.[MD] Bush in Nashua. 1977—Pres. Carter issues a blanket from under the Susquehanna River in prisoners, or let the war continue in Shoichi Yokoi, a Japanese draftee who ous drunkard Boris Yeltsin is handed Perle, D. Rumsfeld, & P. Wolfowitz, 1987—Gorbachev announces the pardon to all Vietnam draft dodgers. Pennsylvania, with nothing to gauge Indochina. It does all three. had been hiding on Guam since 1944. Russia’s nuclear suitcase. to Bill Clinton, urging him to over- new policy of glasnost. 1968—The NVA begins a 78-day their clearance, twelve miners drown 1968—North Korea seizes the USS 1961—A B-52 breaks up over Golds- 1971—Charles Manson and his fol- throw Saddam Hussein. He’s busy de- 1973—Eleven hours before a cease siege of U.S. Marines at Khe Sanh. when the river breaks through. Pueblo for spying within its waters. boro, N.C. Three fail-safe devices fail lowers are convicted in the Tate/La- nying he had “sex with that woman.” fire between the U.S. and North Outnumbered 5 to 1 and suffering 737 1957—George “The Mad Bomber” 1957—Klan members in Montgom- on one armed 24 megaton H-bomb, Bianca murders. Her name’s Monica Lewinski. Vietnam takes effect, an artillery shell KIA/MIA, Marines prevail. Metesky, stiffed on a worker’s comp ery, Ala. force Willie Edwards Jr. to but a fourth works. Radioactive junk 1968—The election of Alexander 1979—Ex-Veep Nelson Rockefeller, makes Col. William B. Nolde the last 1968—A malfunctioning heat- claim, is arrested in New York for jump from a bridge. A judge quashes from a second bomb remains 180 feet Dubcek in Czechoslovakia kicks off 70, alone in his townhouse with 26- official American combat casualty of er ignites unauthorized foam seats planting 30 bombs over 16 years. the indictment of 3 men 19 years later, underground. the “Prague Spring.” year old Megan Marshak, dies of a the Vietnam War. aboard a B-52 over Greenland caus- 1948—Boston Mayor James Curley saying “forcing a person to jump from 1955—Iwo Jima flag raiser Ira Hamil- 1966—An SR-71 Blackbird flying at heart attack. An hour later his corpse 1972—G. Gordon Liddy presents ing it to crash and scatter parts of four asks MIT to study whether flame- a bridge does not naturally and prob- ton Hayes dies of exposure in Sacaton, Mach 3.2 disintegrates 78,000 feet is found by a security guard, five blocks to Attorney General John Mitchell a H-bombs. throwers could be used to clear snow. ably lead to the death of such person.” Ariz. at 32 years of age. above New Mexico, but test pilot Bill away at Rockefeller Center. plan to disrupt the Democratic Con- 1959—Former Little Rascal Carl 1945—Arthur Kasherman becomes 1870—On the Marias River in Mon- 1935—The first-ever canned beer [Kreu- Weaver lives to fly again. 1940—R. Reagan marries J. Wyman vention with “mugging squads, kid- “Alfalfa” Switzer is fatally shot in the the third muckraking Minneapolis tana, Maj. Eugene Baker’s soldiers ger] goes on sale in Richmond, Va. 1927—J. Frank Norris of Fort Worth, in a chapel at Forest Hills Cemetery. napping teams, and prostitutes.” belly by a bear-hunting companion in newspaperman in 11 years to be shot massacre 173 Blackfoot women and 1692—French priest Louis-Pierre a Baptist preacher who fatally shot an 1894—Illinois drops George Painter. 1967—A fire in the Apollo capsule kills a dispute over a lost dog. dead on the street. children. Chief Heavy Runner dies Thury and hundreds of Abenaki raid unarmed man, is acquitted of murder. The rope breaks and he lands on his three astronauts. 1908—A new law bans smoking on 1943—The temperature in Spearfish, holding a U.S. flag given to him to York, Maine, killing 100 and taking 1926—In Passaic, N.J. 16,000 textile head. Bleeding profusely, he’s hanged 1957—Martin Luther King’s home is New York streets—by women. S.D. rises 50 degrees in two minutes. assure their safety. 100 hostage. workers strike. a second time for good measure. bombed for the second time. 1:44 1:50 2:22 2:33 3:05 3:21 3:53 4:15 4:46 5:15 5:43 6:18 6:44 7:23

7:39 8:07 8:23 8:48 9:11 9:34 10:04 10:25 11:03 11:20 12:05 12:20 1:08

Sunday, January 28 Monday, January 29 Tuesday, January 30 Wednesday, January 31 Thursday, February 1 Friday, February 2 Saturday, February 3

2008—George W.[MD] Bush de- 2002—George W.[MD] Bush makes 2005—A U.S. official reports that 2009—A Robinson R22 helicopter 2005—Canada OK’s same-sex mar- 2015—A week after a two-foot snow- 2012—“Today is the day that in 1924 livers his last (!) State of the Union a follow-up call to Majority Leader $9,000,000,000 is … well … sort of spontaneously disassembles itself over riage; world does not end. storm, Po’Town gets 18 inches more. Woodrow Wilson died, that son of a speech, promising a budget that will Daschle asking him to limit Congres- … missing in Iraq. Fillmore, Calif., strewing debris along 2004—Janet Jackson bares a nipple on 2013—Chris Kyle, America’s favorite bitch,” says radio dingbat Glenn Beck, keep the U.S. “on track for a surplus sional investigations into 9/11. 1992—After a loud “Bang!,” a Robin- a 900-foot swath and killing its pilot. TV; world nearly ends. sniper, is shot dead at a shooting range. “and I’m happy.” in 2012.” 1979—“I don’t like Mondays,” replies son R22 helicopter flying over Mala- 2003—At the White House, George 2003—The space shuttle Columbia 2004—George W.[MD] Bush reluc- 2006—Donald Rumsfeld likens 2004—U.S. weapons inspector David Brenda Spencer, 16, when asked why bar, Fla., sheds parts and plummets to W.[MD] Bush tells Tony Blair he’s disintegrates over Texas. tantly OK’s an investigation of intelli- Venezuela’s President Hugo Chavez Kay tells the Senate pre-war WMD she shot eleven people, killing two, at Earth, killing the pilot and a student. going to invade Iraq with or without 1974—Richard Nixon meets for gence failures. to Adolph Hitler, inspiring Venezue- intelligence was “almost all wrong.” a San Diego elementary school. 1981—An FB-111A “Aardvark” WMDs, and diplomacy will have to twenty minutes with the Reverend 1972—In Dublin, Irish Catholics, la’s VP to compare the U.S. with the 2003—In his State of the Union 1970—New uniforms debut for Nix- based at Pease AFB crashes near fit around the military strategy. Sun Myung Moon. irate over “Bloody Sunday,” burn the Third Reich. Address, George W.[MD] Bush on’s White House guards: white with homes at Mariner’s Village, about 1984—President Reagan alleges the 1968—In Saigon, AP photographer British Embassy. 1959—In Iowa, a plane crash kills cites misidentified aluminum tubes, gold buttons and braids, topped by 1.25 miles northwest of Market U.S. has a problem with “people who and former Marine Eddie Adams 1970—Capt. Gary Faust bails out Buddy Holly, “The Big Bopper,” and non-existent viruses, fictitious alli- comic opera hats. They last two weeks. Square. One apartment building is are sleeping on the grates … homeless snaps the anti-Iwo Jima Flag Raising after his F-106 goes into a spin over Richie Valens. ances, and imaginary uranium as am- 1967—LBJ’s pal Bobby Baker is con- destroyed; no one is injured. … you might say, by choice.” photo of the Vietnam War: General Montana. The pilotless plane lands in 1956—In Memphis, the Sun studio ple justification for his next war. victed of income tax evasion, theft, 1976—The Supreme Court decides 1971—In Detroit, Vietnam Veterans Nguyen Ngoc Loan shooting VC a cornfield and is returned to service. simultaneously records Elvis Presley, 1986—Ronald Reagan puts off his and conspiracy to defraud. that limiting campaign contributions Against the War testify about U.S. Captain Nguyen Van Lem, whose 1966—Australians burn their con- Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis, and State of the Union speech because the 1964—Dr. Strangelove premieres. would unfairly restrict the speech of policies in Vietnam. Few listen. hands are tied, in the head. scription papers in Sydney. Johnny Cash. space shuttle Challenger, launched un- 1925—The sub S-48, enroute to the rich people. 1968—The Viet Cong and NVA send 1964—Filthy-minded Governor of 1952—Winnie Ruth Judd, the “trunk 1953—J. Fred Muggs, a bad-tem- der adverse conditions, crashed. Shipyard, grounds itself off Jaffrey’s 1968—Two hundred colonels in the U.S. a message with coordinated attacks Indiana Matthew E. Welsh declares murderess,” makes her fifth escape pered chimpanzee from Cameroon, 1969—Unocal drillers using sub-stan- Point, then again in Little Harbor. MACV staff attend a pool party in Sai- from the Delta to the DMZ, including The Kingsmen’s song “Louie Louie,” from Arizona State Insane Hospital. becomes the first non-human primate dard pipe cause a 100,000-barrel oil 1912—Anna LoPizzo, 34, is killed gon. “Not one … knew Tet was coming” the U.S. Embassy in Saigon: we’re not which everyone else finds incompre- 1915—German national Werner to appear regularly on TV. spill off Santa Barbara, creating an by a shot through the heart during the the next day, an analyst says later. giving up. The U.S. brass don’t hear it hensible, to be obscene. Horn bombs the railroad bridge con- 1943—Four U.S. Navy chaplains 800 square mile oil slick and an envi- Bread & Roses strike in Lawrence, 1945—A Soviet sub sinks the MV but the public does. 1963—Fleetwood Linley, the last necting Vanceboro, Maine with St. aboard the U.S. Army transport ronmental movement. Mass. A cop probably did it, but anar- Wilhelm Gustloff; some 9,400 drown, 1963—“The war in Vietnam is going living person to have looked upon the Croix, Canada. There is little damage. Dorchester drown after giving their life 1958—In Nebraska, Charles Stark- chists are blamed. mostly civilians, half children. well and will succeed,” says Bob Mc- face of the dead Abraham Lincoln, 1912—Steeplejack Frederick R. Law jackets to others. weather, 17, and Carol Fugate, 14, 1889—John M. Clayton [R-Ark.], 1933—Destabilized by austerity, Namara, Secretary of Defense. dies at the age of 75. succesfully parachutes from the Statue 1931—Arkansas’ state legislature kill their 8th through 10th (out of an a Congressional candidate in an largely self-inflicted, Germany al- 1958—In North Africa, a B-47 1960—Civil rights sit-ins begin at of Liberty’s torch. votes to pray for the soul of H.L. eventual 11) victims. election featuring armed white men lows the Nazis to seize power. crashes on takeoff and burns for sev- Woolworth’s in Greensboro, N.C. 1893—The first close-up in motion Mencken after he calls the state “the 1936—Thrill-killer Richard Loeb stealing ballot boxes, is shot through 1798—Rep. Matthew Lyon insults en hours. Luckily the armed nuke on 1951—An inevitable confluence: the picture history is shot at the Edison apex of moronia.” is murdered by a fellow-prisoner at his boarding house window. He’s de- Rep. Roger Griswold on the House board doesn’t go off. first television broadcast of an atomic studio in West Orange, N.J., immor- 1916—In Zurich, Hugo Ball opens whom he made a pass. The Chicago clared the winner; the seat left vacant. floor. Griswold calls Lyon a coward. 1950—Truman orders the construc- explosion. talizing a sneeze. Café Voltaire, hotbed of dadaism. Daily News writes that Loeb, “… a 1863—U.S. Army troops and Sho- Lyon spits in Griswold’s face. tion of the first H-bomb. 1926—Col. Billy Mitchell, the lone 1882—James Joyce is born. 1811—Future newspaperman and master of the English language, today shone Indians clash at the Bear River 1661—Oliver Cromwell, dead for two 1945—Out of the 21,000 U.S. sol- U.S. military officer who understands 1870—The “Cardiff Giant,” hyped eccentric Horace Greeley is born on a ended a sentence with a proposition.” in Utah. After the Shoshone run out years, is posthumously executed and diers who desert during WW II, the potential of aircraft in warfare, is for months as a petrified, ten-foot-tall farm in Amherst, N.H. 1922—The roof of the Knickerbocker of ammo, rapes and a massacre begin. decapitated. His head goes unburied Private Eddie Slovik gets to be the one court-martialled for criticizing his human, is revealed to have been an 1793—Shot in the face and bayoneted Theatre in Washington, D.C. collaps- 1834—Workers on the Chesapeake for 300 years. who’s executed by a firing squad. “superiors.” atheist tobacconist’s . 13 times by the British at Lexington es under thirty inches of snow, killing & Ohio Canal go on strike. President 1649—King Charles I discovers 1900—William Goebel is sworn in as 1923—In Japan, most of Tokyo and 1848—The Treaty of Guadalupe Hi- 17 years before, Samuel Whittemore, 98 and injuring 133. Jackson [Dem.] begins a tradition by divine right has limits when Oliver Governor of Kentucky a day after be- all of Yokohama are destroyed by an dalgo legalizes America’s seizure of a farmer, dies of natural causes at 98. 1887—New York newsboys go on strike. siccing Federal troops on them. Cromwell removes his head. ing shot. Three days later he dies. earthquake; 143,000 die. half of Mexico. 1468—RIP J. Gutenberg. 7:45 8:26 8:44 9:25 9:41 10:21 10:35 11:13 11:27 12:04 12:19 12:54 1:10

1:20 2:09 2:20 3:08 3:19 4:04 4:15 4:57 5:08 5:47 6:00 6:36 6:52 7:25

Now Salting CRESCENT Portland, Maine AROMATICS

Kate Leigh 94B Pleasant St Therapeutic Massage, Portsmouth, New Hampshire 03801 Aromatherapy & Bodywork 603.501.8813 crescentaromatics.com Jill Vranicar • Kate Leigh • Dana Lincoln

Come in and check out your community’s 16 Market Square, Portsmouth, NH Next to City Hall in Downtown Dover, NH new aromatics shop Since 2011 offering products, services, and classes. (603) 436-6006 3 Hale Street j (603) 742-1737 7 Commercial Alley ~ 766-1616 www.portsmouthsaltcellar.com