YOU're NOT ALONE Bookletxx
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You’re Not Alone You’re Not Alone No Matter What You Hear, No Matter How Things Seem, You Are Not Alone. FUNDED BY : AIDS TRUST OF AUSTRALIA, FRUITS IN SUITS, LOTTERYWEST, COMMONWEALTH DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND AGED CARE Growing up in a world that seems to revolve around being attracted to the opposite sex can be tough when you are thinking about liking people of the same sex. No wonder when people start to identify their feelings for the same sex, life can become rather confusing and complicated. Who do you turn to? What information do you need? Where can you go? Are these feelings OK? All of us involved with It takes time to know who this book have gone you are. It is OK to "I suppose I see the people around me in two through these feelings question your sexuality, groups, those who can and experiences. It can it’s OK to be unsure and understand and cherish be overwhelming when its OK to take your time. who I am and my sexuality, you start to realise that Many young people have and those that are not yet you might be attracted to similar feelings to you, it that lucky." Trish, 18 people who are the same is all part of finding out about yourself. sex as you. And in a "I always felt different, it world where almost In this book we have was not until later I found everything is geared gathered together the a name for how I felt. For towards people who are most common questions me, being gay is being attracted to the opposite asked about being 100% me, not just 50% sex, finding information attracted to someone of me." David, 19 can be difficult. We hope the same sex, or about this book helps clarify gay, lesbian and bisexual "I felt really alone and your feelings and provides people and attempted to afraid for so long. I tried you with some provide some answers. to ignore my feelings and You’re Not Alone information and support. You have taken a big pretend to be someone else. Then I met other When reading through step just by choosing to gays and lesbians who this book, there are three read this book. Feel were happy, successful, Special thanks to all the Produced by the ‘Here for Life’ proud of yourself and Copyright: ‘Here for Life’ things to consider : and were achieving their young people who shared Youth Sexuality Project Team: trust your feelings. Youth Sexuality Project It’s OK to be attracted dreams. I knew I could themselves through the Graham Brown, Pia Coates and 1997, WA AIDS Council. to someone of the same too!" Peter, 20 comments and photographs Melissa Gillett. Not to be reprinted or sex. Being attracted to If you’d like to talk to in this book. reproduced without people of the same sex is someone about your "I didn’t know who I was permission. a natural and healthy way feelings, get more or what I was about. I to be. information about sexuality didn’t think there was any A joint project of the Gay Thanks to all the young Revised and Reprinted by or gender expression or point to my life. Then I and Lesbian Counselling people at the Freedom Freedom Centre staff and You’re not alone. There would like to meet other found some info, and met Service (WA) and the WA Centre, Breakaway, Groovy volunteers 2003 are thousands of young young people who feel the other lesbians and gay AIDS Council. Funded by the Girls, Other Voices, 1526, people who have been Photography by Nadine same, you can call (08) guys who felt good about Commonwealth Department Parents and Friends of through this and many 9482 0000 or write to Toussaint – ph: 0412 866 658 themselves. I could talk of Health and Family Lesbians and Gays (WA), the more wondering about The Freedom Centre, PO about my feelings and my [email protected] Services ‘Here for Life’ youth workers and their sexuality and Box 1510, West Perth questions with other Youth Suicide Prevention counsellors and everyone else Design by Lauren Willhelm, whether they are the only 6872 or email young people who felt the Initiative. who assisted with this book. Designmine Pty Ltd one. [email protected]. same." Angela, 17 Am I The Only One With These Feelings? There are thousands of other people who feel attracted to people of the same sex as themselves. They live across the nation and worldwide and are a part of every culture’s history.You are not the only one. I Think I Might Be Gay, Lesbian Or Many people think of try to change a person’s Bisexual; But sexuality as a range of sexual orientation (USA the same sex may not mean sexual orientations. At one Psychiatric Association; Before we get started we’d like to clarify What If I Don’t you’re gay, lesbian or bisexual end of the range are USA Psychological the meaning of some of the words used in either – just as one or two people who are attracted Association; British Know For Sure? only to the same sex, at Psychiatric Association) this book. sexual experiences with someone of the opposite sex the other end of the range You’ll know when you know. are people who are Heterosexual : People whose sexual and romantic may not mean you’re Why Do I Feel Attracted It could take a while, and attracted only to the feelings are primarily for the opposite sex. exclusively heterosexual. there’s no need to rush. opposite sex, and at To People Of My Own You do not need to be various stages in between Sex? Homosexual : People whose sexual and romantic feelings Some gay, lesbian or bisexual are primarily for the same sex. People who feel this way sexually active with other are people who are people say that from the Young people often ask, often identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. people to recognise or attracted to both sexes. time they were very young "Why am I attracted to understand your sexuality. So, wherever you are on they "felt different". They had people of the same sex?" Gay : People whose sexual and romantic feelings are Your feelings and your that continuum, you are crushes on friends of their It’s interesting that not primarily for the same sex. In Australia this can mean emotional and physical clearly not alone. Some men or women, though tends to be used mainly for men own gender – and no one many people ask, "Why attractions will help tell you estimates say that one in who identify themselves as gay. seemed to be talking about am I attracted to people who you are. every ten people is gay, that. Often it took a while to lesbian or bisexual. of the opposite sex?" The Lesbian : Women whose sexual and romantic feelings put a name to their feelings Your sexuality will become Estimates vary depending answer is the same to are primarily for other women. – to begin to think of clearer over time. Don’t on how comfortable people both of these questions worry if you aren’t sure. are in reporting their Bisexual or Bi : Refers to people whose sexual and themselves as gay, lesbian or Our society is often looking Being young is a time of feelings in a survey. romantic feelings are for both men and women. bisexual. But when they for a cause for something started thinking in those figuring out what works for that is different so that it Homophobia : An individual’s or society’s words, it made sense – it you and strong feelings and “There are gay, lesbian or can be "fixed". Being misunderstanding, ignorance or fear of gay, lesbian or fitted in with the feelings they experimentation are often bisexual people all around attracted to people of the bisexual people. had growing up. part of that. In time, you’ll you – you just can’t always same sex is not find that you’re drawn mostly tell who they are.There are something that needs to Transgender : People who do not identify with the sex or Many people don’t begin to to men or to women or to so many gay people who be fixed, in the same way gender with which they were born with. This has to do discover their sexual with the feeling of not being born into the right physical both – and you’ll know then. are not "obvious" that it is that being attracted to attraction until much later body. You don’t have to label easy to forget they are someone of the opposite into adulthood and it can be yourself today or ever. there. Being gay is natural sex is not something that just as confusing then. Coming Out : A phrase that can mean something because you are following needs to be fixed. different to everyone. It has to do with developing an At some point, almost the instincts nature gave awareness that you are gay, lesbian or bisexual. This We live in a world that everybody gets a "crush" on you." Adam, 21 often leads to being more open with others about sexual "I guess it is hard to know. often fears and questions identity. someone of the same sex difference. This is the like a great teacher or a You’ve just got to go with your gut feeling – it’s Is It Natural To Be Gay, reason for racism, sexism Sexual Orientation and Sexuality : The direction of sexual friend’s older sister or generally right." Leah, 18 Lesbian Or Bisexual? and other forms of and romantic attractions.