May 2016 Volume 7 Issue 5

MAY 2016 VOLUME 7 ISSUE 5

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INSIDE Money bail – p. 2

Crafting rituals – p. 3 LGBTQ Pioneer Jim Toy Bus improvements – p. 3 – p. 4

Muslims in A2 – p. 6

Houses & Hearts – p. 7

Puzzles – p. 8

Poetry – p. 9

Pound of flesh – p. 10

Macadamia cookies – p. 12

www.GroundcoverNews.org 2 OPINION Money bail and alternatives to incarceration Desiree Ferguson, an assistant Defender Technology can ameliorate some bias The principle that a person who has not in the Michigan Appellate Defender issues and allow the accused to main- been convicted of a crime should not by Susan Beckett Office and a professor at the U-M law tain a normal schedule if implemented lose their liberty was the thrust of the Publisher school. Unsurprisingly, 67 percent of for bail assessment. In a calm setting, Bail Reform Act of 1966. It calls for a returning citizens are still unemployed accused people can describe their cur- presumption of release of defendants five years after incarceration, Ferguson rent circumstances with the assistance on their personal recognizance, though asserts. of family and friends, online spell- judges can impose restrictions if they checkers and translators. Bail commis- feel there is a danger of flight or further Last month’s column explained how The first brush with bars occurs at -ar sioners receive a report that includes violence. In 1984, Congress passed an Pay or Stay sentencing destroys the lives rest, shortly after which a judge decides the charges, prior convictions and the act that added conditions for withhold- of those living paycheck-to-paycheck. whether or not the accused should be defendant’s statement and make their ing bail to include certain categories This one initiates exploration of how jailed until trial or released. It used to bail recommendation on that basis, of crimes, including drug offenses for people with ample financial resources get be customary to release people un- thereby removing the bias based on ap- which the sentence was greater than 10 preferential treatment in the criminal less their history suggested that they pearance and ability to speak in public. years. With the mandatory minimums justice system, starting with maintaining were likely to flee or pose a threat to for drug possession, this led to an their freedom prior to conviction. Unless the community. It is now customary to Matterhorn™ is an online court pro- avalanche of accused people spending otherwise noted, the quotes below were require bail in exchange for freedom. gram designed to enhance access and years in jail before ever being convicted. taken from presentations at the sympo- fairness with technology. It is currently sium Innocent until Proven Poor, hosted Being incarcerated prior to trial leads to used in Washtenaw County for traf- Bail is rarely imposed in federal cases. by the Michigan Journal of Race and worse outcomes at trial – a higher like- fic disputes where it has reduced the If danger to the community or flight are Law and University of Michigan (U-M) lihood of conviction, longer sentences, combined court staff time per hearing risks, the defendant is equipped with Law School in February of 2016. and guilty pleas with fewer concessions from 157 minutes to just over 27 while a tether with a range considered safe, received than by those who were re- also being much more convenient for sometimes restricted to their home. “Poverty is both a predictor and conse- leased on bail, according to a Criminal the motorists. Court Solutions, the Ann quence of incarceration,” according to Justice Policy article by Meghan Sacks Arbor-based company that developed State bail laws and procedures vary and and Alissa R. Ackerman, “Bail and Sen- Matterhorn™, is developing software are subject to monetary considerations. tencing: Does Pretrial Detention Lead that could be used in determining the Milwaukee D.A. John Chisholm imple- GROUNDCOVER to Harsher Punishment?” need for and level of pre-trial bail on a mented an Evidenced-Based Decision case-by-case basis. Making Framework in 2009, and as a MISSION: The failure to secure release pending result of that evaluation, is working to Creating opportunity and a voice trial is onerous. Even three days in jail Industries have sprung up with the get cash out of the bail system. for low-income people while tak- turns a low-risk person into high-risk prevalence of requiring bail. Bail ing action to end homelessness and with regard to recidivism. It also cor- bondsmen, who have a strong lobby, There are ongoing costs associated with poverty. relates with more severe final sentenc- are the largest beneficiaries but courts tethers. Tethers have to be purchased, ing. The Department of Justice (DOJ) also collect fees for bonds. In a Wayne maintained and fitted. Officers have to Susan Beckett, Publisher declared routine pre-trial detention to County case, a Groundcover vendor be available to respond when the tether [email protected] be unconstitutional yet it continues as a accused of resisting arrest had a 10 alarm indicates that it has been taken Lee Alexander, Editor matter of course. percent bond set at $10,000. The court beyond its designated boundaries or [email protected] accepted the $1,000 financed by a bene- to grant overrides when appropriate. Local sheriffs dislike when untried factor as surety. (If she had not shown Those costs can be burdensome for the Andrew Nixon Associate Editor , people fill their jails. As the accused are up for trial she would have been liable municipality. Contributors commonly held with other prisoners, for the entire $10,000.) She did appear frequently in overcrowded conditions, The practice of passing these costs on Elizabeth Bauman for her court date but only $900 was jail exposes them to disease, physical returned – the other $100 went to the to the accused, along with charges for Jenny Blair violence and sexual assault. There is of- court for fees. Guilty or innocent, fees other pre-trial “services” such as drug ten significant personal disruption, too, are not returned. testing, further stresses the person who Zsuzsa Blom in loss of employment, strained rela- should still be presumed innocent. Martha Brunell tionships including the possible loss of There is no consumer protection Costs such as these, which often cannot child custody, interruption of ongoing mechanism regarding bail companies. be paid by the poor, open them up to La Shawn Courtwright education or treatment programs and a A California woman was arrested and warrants for a failure to pay, thereby William Crandell triggering of anxiety disorders. bail was set at $150,000. The woman saddling them with a criminal history was desperate for release since she was even if they are ultimately found inno- Rachel Deweese Imposing bail greatly disadvantages the primary care-taker for her grand- cent of the initial crime. minorities and the poor. There is fre- mother who could not be left alone. Dave Franklin quently no public defender representa- It was impossible for her to raise the Former U.S. Attorney General Eric Maria Hagen tion at bail hearings, and bond courts customary 10 percent – $15,000 in this Holder’s directive to minimize manda- are under pressure to process people case – to secure the money through tory minimum sentencing is part of Letters to the Editor: quickly. Decisions on the risk of flight a bondsman. She accepted the bail a culture change that will reduce the [email protected] are made based solely on information company’s alternative of paying $1,500 number of people incarcerated prior to such as the lack of a permanent address up front and repaying the remaining conviction. But a larger culture shift is Story or Photo Submissions: or employer without looking further to $13,500 – at the highest allowable inter- called for – one in which the accused [email protected] discover other factors, such as depen- est rate – over the ensuing years. is actually treated in accordance with dent children in the area. Bail commis- the presumption of innocence. The vast Advertising: [email protected] sioners often decide bail levels based on The case was thrown out the next day majority of people should be released the alleged crime without consideration by the District Attorney and she was on their own recognizance. www.groundcovernews.org of any personal information except the never charged with a crime. Nonethe- defendant’s criminal history and ap- facebook.com/groundcover less, she still had to repay the $13,500 423 S. 4th Ave, Ann Arbor pearance, opening the door to personal loan and lose the $1,500. 734-707-9210 bias.

www.groundcovernews.org LOOKING WITHIN 3 Who crafts the rituals? practice of ritual back to my childhood alternative to do it for them. Then and on what she might do to rejuvenate birthday parties. The weather was now, I remain convinced that we have her desire to be close to God. Before always lovely in upstate New York in the makings of great rituals waiting to long we circled around to the option by Rev. Dr. Martha early September when those parties be tapped in our hearts, minds, and of intentional candle lighting. The Brunell occurred, so they happened outside. guts. very next day with another directee, I Groundcover What is now important to me about suggested we start our time together Contributor words of invitation, about celebration’s I’ve been reminded again of that with a candle practice I use in larger opportunity to punctuate time with conviction this spring. I visited in and groups. That candle framed out our meaning, about belovedness, about the around Ann Arbor for a few days in time and connected us in compassion We who are regular participants in a hospitality of food and refreshments April. My drive back home to Illinois with any who long for a sense of faith, spirit, or wisdom community spread out, about surprise, and on Interstate 94 was miserable. The presence they are not currently feeling. often order our lives with specific ritual giftedness, and mirthful play: all of it I highway was jammed with trucks, This thread of candles didn’t originate practices from those communities. learned first at birthday parties when and it was raining so hard we could with a formal church practice initiated Sometimes we mistakenly perceive I was a child. My parents didn’t have a barely see one another. I stopped at a by an ordained church leader on an that rituals only occur in designated self-help manual on how to orchestrate rest stop to use the bathroom and saw appointed day. It began with the love community settings under the direction a child’s birthday party. They just leapt there was a text from my friends with of ordinary people in the pews who of someone trained to carry them in and made it happen. I did similarly whom I’d stayed. They asked how my wanted to communicate through a out among us. I know the capacity to with my daughters, Amanda and Molly. trip home was going. When I texted concrete action their being-with-me design ritual moments of meaning Like my parents before me, we dove back the conditions and requested during difficult driving. Each of us can is not held by a few or only intended inside whatever theme they chose – traveling prayers, I received from them figure out gestures of care and attention for institutional expression. Ritual snow, poetry, recycling, the circus, the affirmation that a candle had been that embody meaning for us and others. possibilities and those who create them around the world, an out-of-this- lit at their end. Several days later we As human beings, we have this ability abound. I suspect if you are reading this world sleepover, a teddy bear’s picnic, were in touch again; one of them was from within even if it is unused. What column, you too are a maker of ritual buttons, art time – designing rituals presenting a program and was a bit rituals are already a part of your daily even if you don’t believe it. and activities to flesh out a party from nervous. I told her my candle was lit. life or happen periodically across the the invitations all the way to the treat As a result of our candle exchange, my year? Notice them. Name them. Are th Late in 1992 I was in my 15 year of bags. As my kids grew, I was saddened morning ritual now includes a simple there rituals missing in the flow of your ordained ministry and realized that watching other parents who were candle lighting when I name a person days, weeks, months, and years? Listen the beginnings of my life in liturgy and convinced they were unable to tease or group I want to be especially mindful for gestures to give those rituals texture ritual came long before any seminary out birthday rituals from the stuff of of throughout the day. Recently in and shape, embracing meaning for you course. That fall I wrote a piece their lives and needed to hire a pizza a session with one of my spiritual and for others. tracing my sense of liturgy and my parlor, an arcade, or another expensive directees, that directee asked for ideas TheRide: major bus system improvements to take effect this month by Jenny Blair new Sunday service. In August 2015, Groundcover Contributor the transportation authority phased On May 1, bus passengers in Ann in later weekend service and boosted Arbor and Ypsilanti will get a lot of new several routes, among other changes. options. TheRide is also currently reviewing TheRide, Ann Arbor Transportation proposed policy changes that would af- Authority’s bus service, is expanding its fect A-Ride, the paratransit program. service in Ann Arbor and Ypsilanti. It’s the largest expansion since 1979, the For more information, visit theride.org. year fixed-route service in Ann Arbor began. Deborah Freer, community outreach coordinator, recommends that bus Of the 31 preexisting routes, all but five passengers sign up for MyAlerts so that will get new names or numbers. New TheRide can keep them posted about routes are coming to Ann Arbor and service disruptions. Several lines in Ypsilanti, and there will also be new particular are expected to face delays service to Scio Township and in Pitts- due to construction. field Township. Here are just a few of the many changes Passengers with questions can call to take effect May 1: TheRide’s largest expansion since 1979, including new routes and expanded paratransit 734-996-0400, check TheRideYourWay. services, takes effect on May 1. org, or email [email protected]. Freer • The new Route 30 in Ann Arbor, says they will answer emails within 24 one of two routes to replace old hours. Route 9, will now stop at the Inter- • More passengers will be able to ac- What won’t change: Routes 4, 5, and 6 faith Hospitality Network / Alpha cess ARide, the paratransit program and the intercity routes 46 and 67. House family shelter and proceed for riders with disabilities. The changes come to the Meijer on Zeeb Road in Scio Are you a Township. (That’s well past its old In the new numbering system, Ann as part of a five- turnaround at Wagner Road, which Arbor local routes are numbered 21 year transporta- Non-profit was a long walk for Alpha House through 33, with the numbers going tion improvement residents.) clockwise around downtown. Ypsilanti program funded that needs local routes are numbered 41 through by the Public computer support? • Ypsilanti’s notoriously long Route 47, also going clockwise. Routes in the Transportation 20 will become a pair of new two- 60s are crosstown connectors that don’t millage that voters We work within your budget. way routes. serve either city’s transit center, while approved in May • A new Ypsilanti north-south Route those that do are numbered 3 through 2014. That August Call today for help! 800.859.8751 68 will run along Harris and Ford 6. Express routes are numbered in the saw improve- Roads, including a loop to Grove 90s. ments that includ- Road. ed later weekday www.driventechnology.com

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www.groundcovernews.org 4 YOU HEARD IT HERE Jim Toy – renowned activist and LGBTQ champion by Dave Franklin He, with the help of “Gay” referring, as it so often does now, Groundcover Contributor some of the members to lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals. of the congregation, Gender identity – transgender – was “When the pupil is ready, the teacher integrated the church not in anyone’s picture then. So, I went appears.” – Confucius racially. It became to the priest – radical years, radical vo- the first interracial cabulary – and said, “Daddy-oh (that’s “When the people are ready, the leaders Episcopal Church in what we called him), what is this gay appear.” – unknown Detroit. He moved meeting thing?” on, and then the next Jim Toy is to the Lesbian-Gay-Bisexual- rector further opened He said, “I don’t have a clue. One of Transgender-Queer (LGBTQ) com- up the church, also the guys in the draft resistance move- munity what Martin Luther King, Jr. allowing the church ment asked, ‘Can we have a gay meet- was to the Civil Rights movement of building to serve as ing here?’ and I said back to him ‘Well, the 1960s. a sanctuary for men whatever it is if we can’t have a ‘gay’ who were attempting meeting here we might as well shut During a time of great civil unrest – the to flee the draft. This this God-box down.’” Which is how we nationwide anti-Vietnam war protests was during the Viet- referred to the church in those radical – Toy came forward in 1970 at an anti- nam War. They would years. war rally at Kennedy Square in Detroit take refuge there on I, from the depths of my closet, said, and declared his sexual orientation. their way to Canada. He became the first openly gay man in “Thank you, thank you,” and went Michigan. It was a dangerous time to And that same back to Ann Arbor where I was in grad be so bold, so personally honest and church, under the school at U-M at the time. I ran right true to one’s nature. same rector, became a down to the gay bar and there was my sanctuary for people good buddy at the time and I said, Toy’s subsequent activism and achieve- at risk of physical “John, there’s something very strange ments have earned him grateful rec- Jim Toy shares some activism pointers and continues violence during the going on at the God-box.” He said, ognition from the LGBTQ community advocating for the LGBTQ community, especially for older Detroit riots. So this “What’s that?” I said, “A gay meeting.” and the public, as well as accolades adults forced back in the closet by insensitive end-of-life was then an example, He said, “What’s that?” I said, “I don’t from academia. A prolific author, Toy care institutions. for me, of social ac- know! Should we go?” notably co-authored the first official JT: I grew up in Ohio during the 30s tion, what the church was trying to do. We agonized for a month. We both “Lesbian-Gay Pride Week Proclama- and 40s. My father was ethnically I was a bystander, an onlooker. I took tion” by the governing body of the Ann were totally in the closet, aside from Chinese and my mom was white. There no part in it until in 1970, six months going to the bar, because there was no Arbor City Council and the Diocesan were three families of color only, in a or so after the Stonewall riots in New Human Sexuality Curriculum. resource, no gathering place for lesbi- total population of 1,200. Racism was York City. ans, gays, and bisexuals at the time in rampant. I was in middle school during Toy was instrumental in establishing Ann Arbor. We finally trekked off to the Second World War. Around my I saw a note on the church calendar that the Ann Arbor Gay Liberation Front, Detroit. That marked our coming out neck I wore a sign with black letters on said “Gay meeting, January something the City of Ann Arbor HIV/AIDS Task to each other, to ourselves, to the dozen white that said “I am not a Jap.” Because 1970.” There never had been, at least Force, the Ann Arbor Gay Hotline apparently my peers were on my case, in Michigan, an openly “gay” meeting. see JIM TOY, page 5 and the Human Sexuality Office at the either thinking or wanting to believe University of Michigan (U-M). He also that I was Japanese. advocated for U-M to amend its non- discrimination bylaws to include sexual I still am full of internalized racism. orientation as a protected category. Toy And I am full of all the other isms that was appointed as a founding member of were rampant in the village: classicism the Diocesan Commission on Human on the basis of economic status, sexism, Sexuality by the Episcopal Diocese of religious prejudice. And to this day, Michigan, serving as its Secretary since getting back to the internalized racism, 1971. my metaphor for myself is a banana: I may be yellow on the outside but, thank We were honored to ask Mr. Toy the you, I am white inside. And at least I following questions as he prepares am aware of that particular “ism” and I to address a large audience at the Big hope of the others. Hearts for Seniors screening of the film Letter to Anita at the Michigan Theater RD: When you talk about the “isms,” on May 26. This documentary explores you mean that you experienced them how yesterday’s discrimination shaped being on the other side of them as today’s LGBTQ older adults. What fol- well as becoming aware that you have lows is an excerpt from our conversa- them yourself? tion. You can read the fascinating interview in its entirety on the Groundcover JT: Absolutely. And it was only years News website, groundcovernews.org. later, after I came out of my – what should I say – gay closet, that I began to [JT: Jim Toy; RD: Rachel Dewees, Direc- get involved with, or directly involved tor of Turner Senior Resource Center; with what some of us refer to as social ZB: Zsuzsa Blom, Groundcover News action. I moved from Manhattan in 117 N. First St., Suite 111, Ann Arbor, MI 48104 board member] 1957, to work in a radical Episcopal www.Iglesiamartell.com (734) 369-2331 church in Detroit because the rector had met me when I was a kid and later Free 30 min. Consultation RD: What in your early life sent you invited me to come to the church to with this Ad down this path? take the music program.

www.groundcovernews.org YOU HEARD IT HERE 5 Interview with activist Jim Toy continued from page 4 I also learned that when I’m trying to gay!” So maybe five years ago,The Daily “How aware are you of their beliefs and produce some kind of positive change ran a retrospective on the black action attitudes towards gender identity and or so women and men who were taking in any particular agency or group, if movement strike. They had on the front sexual orientation concerns?” we asked. the risk of coming to the meeting. We I can, I should become a part of that page of The Daily a picture of a march “Some churches and synagogues are decided to start an ongoing group and group and work from the inside. up State Street. The only banner visible really supportive and some are certainly called it Detroit Gay Liberation Move- said “Gay Liberation Front!” Well that’s ‘anti-TBLGQ’ concerns.” ment. Personally, I have tried to achieve some ironic! kind of balance between listening as “Oh, we never thought of that!” they John and I went in there three to four sympathetically as I can to the concerns ZB: They are still aiming for 10 per- said. So we suggested they vet the times a week for meetings. That got of whoever I’m talking with, and speak- cent. people who come here to provide pas- pretty old pretty quickly, so we said, ing out openly and as persuasively as toral care. If I’m on my deathbed I don’t “Why don’t we start a group in Ann I can to and on behalf of whoever I’m JT: That’s incredible! I think it’s seven need someone to tell me to change or Arbor?” We put an ad in The Michigan trying to help. And if I’m not a member percent now. I’m going to hell. Daily. About 100 people showed up of the group I’m trying to help, I try to to the first meeting and we formed be an ally. For example, I try to ally with RD: What are your thoughts on the RD: That’s an end-of-lifespan issue the Ann Arbor Gay Liberation Front women. issues and implications of working for for all home health agencies. It seems (AAGLF). We met in the Michigan social change for older adults who are practically criminal and truly tragic Union every week. Another principle is to be more open gay, lesbian, bisexual? for somebody to feel that in order to and direct about what I am trying to do get good care at the end of their life The secretary there said, “Jim, do you when I’m working at a lower level of the JT: Elder people in this country are by- they need to again deny who they are. guys know there are people paid here to bureaucracy in a complex organization and-large treated with ignorance, dis- head up an office for women students like U-M. I was trying to consult with dain, and sometimes active harassment JT: One of my lesbian activist friends at U-M? And there’s also paid people to people who were in the closet at upper and discrimination. I’m a member of a who worked in Detroit for decades had head up an office for black students. Do levels of the administration. They very group in Detroit, Services & Advocacy to enter a facility on the west side of you guys want an office for yourselves?” clearly and very accurately said, “At my for GLBT Elders (SAGE), that is affili- the state, very upscale as things go, and ated with the American Civil Liberties sent me a message, “Here I am and I’m At the next meeting of the AAGLF I level I can NOT be open. I cannot even Union (ACLU). They are working on totally back in the closet because I have asked, “Do we want such a group for come out of the closet. But you guys the concerns of TBLGQ [an alterna- sensed that the atmosphere here is not us?” They looked at me like some kind that are lower down in the bureaucracy; tive term to “LGBTQ” – Toy orders the in my favor.” of fool. “Yes, we want an office, go get you can.” groups by the level of discrimination it.” I told the secretary, “Yes we want an And when serving as an ally, I listened they face] people who are aging. For ex- RD: These are the reasons that we office. How do we get it?” “Write me a as best I could to what the people who ample, we need training about TBLGQ wanted this topic and the filmLetter memo,” she said. needed or wanted allies wanted us to concerns in our institutions that are set for Anita for the Big Hearts event. We up to address the needs of elder people. see lots of room for improvement in About six to eight months later (a do. We didn’t go charging out trying to the five agencies that will benefit. We nanosecond in bureaucratic time), they help women, doing what we thought RD: Can you elaborate on the train- also see an opportunity to educate had given us an office in the Michigan we should do. We consulted with the ing needed in these institutions? the community. Can you say why you Union and hired Cynthia Gair and me women with whom we were working, wanted to become involved in Big to head up the office in the fall of 1971. the Women’s Liberation Group. JT: We hear, for example, that there Hearts? The University took the enormous risk ZB: Sounds like mutual respect. aren’t any gay people here. Well of of creating the office; it was the first one course the staff aren’t aware that there JT: This event, I hope, will bring con- in the world, let alone in the United JT: I learned a hard lesson at the office are because the environment is so toxic. cerns about harassment and discrimi- States. I worked there for 23 years or so. that the University had given us. We Never have I seen in an agency that nation against TBLGQ people, racial had co-coordinators for 23 years, a serves the elderly any indication that minorities, people with lower economic RD: When you think about people woman and a man, and our administra- they are aware that TBLGQ people ex- status and people living with disabilities in social activism, are there certain tive assistant was also woman. At one of ist. No magazines, no books, no vid- – anyone who is deemed and judged qualities you feel they should possess our staff meetings my co-coordinator eos, no photos of same sex couple for negatively to be different in a negative that would make them more success- and our assistant said, “Just a minute!” example. The education has to start, I sense – to the minds of the people who ful? They looked at me and I said, “What?” believe, with the administration of any come to see this documentary film. particular agency, and then work down JT: One of the principles that I learned and they said, “You are so sexist!” I said, Hopefully, this film will make it clear administrative levels so that every at the School of Social Work is to trans- “What?” They said, “You are so sex- that discrimination and harassment person who is an employee there or a form a problem into a statement of a ist!” And I said, “What do you mean?” are rampant and must be addressed. In staff person or a member of the admin- goal, a positive goal that is achievable “Well, for example you interrupt us all Letter to Anita, Ronnie had to deal with istrative board becomes clearly aware of and that is visible. So, the person who’s the time.” I was not aware of that and discrimination on a personal level and these concerns. got the problem can tell when they’ve said, “I’m so sorry.” Well, a minute later so she did. Easy for me to say. It was achieved that goal. I interrupted them again so it was a painful and it must have been debilitat- hard lesson! Male privilege, right? Male My stepmom was living in assisted living to her beyond belief, yet it’s uplift- ing and my sibs and I were down there “We want justice” is a big vision state- sexism, yeah. ing because Ronnie has documented for visiting one Sunday. The staff brought ment. Narrow that down to something us her own story, of losing custody of in a guitar trio for entertainment. They like, “We are being mistreated by Let me give another example of trying her children to her then husband, and played a couple of numbers and then whomever and here’s our example.” Fol- to be an ally. During the black action how she went about doing that. That, the leader began making anti-gay jokes. low up with, “How would you like to be movement strike in 1970, they basically for me, is an example of transforming a treated by that group?” And by that we shut down central campus because they harmful situation into as positive of one In Arbor Hospice, 10 years ago, my mean, “What might you be able to con- [the activists] were striving for a 10 as she was able at the time to achieve. friend and I were invited to do a train- vince the group to do on your behalf percent black student enrollment, and ing on TBLGQ concerns and the staff that’s positive for you?” Then we need were not getting it. So they were picket- RD: Thank you so much for giving us were really receptive. We thanked them some practical steps to get us where we ing in front of Angell Hall. I went over your time. and they asked, “What should we do?” need to go with this concern, steps that and said “I’m going to stand with you We said our thing and then asked about JT: Thank you for yours, too. we can take and know that, when we guys.” And they said, “No, you aren’t!” their pastoral care visitors. have taken them, they have produced a I said, “No?” They said “You’re going positive result. to give us a bad name because you’re

www.groundcovernews.org 6 AROUND TOWN Muslims in Ann Arbor: still waiting to be fully embraced by Maria Hagen fundamentalism, great. But are you also Groundcover Intern concerned about Christian, or Jewish, or any other faith’s fundamentalism?” In a town as culturally progressive as asked Greg Briggs, associate pastor at Ann Arbor, the recent anti-Islamic Bethlehem United Church of Christ chalking that appeared on the Diag on in Ann Arbor and member of the One the University of Michigan campus at Human Family movement. “Islam is a the end of March was a shock to many faith like, any other faith, and people in the community. should just be respected as individuals, free to practice whatever they believe.” Zainab Farhat, a graduate student in social work and public health from One Human Family is an interfaith Dearborn, and a Muslim, said that she group raising awareness about the was not surprised. “When you grow up alienation of Muslims in Michigan. Ac- with this identity post-9/11 you expect cording to Briggs, sometimes Muslim this,” she said. Even in Ann Arbor, she families come to them at the Farmer’s said, anti-Muslims sentiment exists, Market and thank them for their sup- “but people don’t think it does.” port. The organization sells yard signs with the message “We support refugees What did surprise Farhat was the reac- and our Muslim neighbors,” and several tion of her friends and acquaintances local churches that participate in the who contacted her to apologize, to Anti-Muslim graffiti was scrawled in chalk in the University of Michigan Diag. Photo movement have displayed these words ensure she was all right, and to stand in by Maria Hagen. on large banners. solidarity. As a graduate student, Farhat welcome.” In a tense moment like this Groups like ISIS, Boko Haram, and rarely crosses the Diag so she never one, the impact of such gestures is huge. Al-Shabaab in Somalia are extrem- “Actions like this chalking frustrate us,” saw the chalking. “For those who walk ist organizations that have grown out said Farhat. Both she and Mohamed through there it can be triggering, es- The chalking was an assemblage of of desperate conditions. According emphasized the level of diversity in pecially when they are stressed out and provocative phrases, including “#Sto- to Mohamed, their main targets are Islam, and many different paths people away from home,” she said. “I consider pIslam” and “Trump 2016.” With the other Muslims, often those who live in take in it. “There are almost two billion myself emotionally mature and I can election season underway, identities are poverty with few other options and no Muslims in the world, so they can’t all find balance because I’m numb to these being politicized, said Farhat. opportunity for education. “In desper- be bad,” said Mohamed. things.” ate situations, you either lose God or Omar Mohamed, outreach chair at the you grow closer to him,” said The University did not remove the Islamic Center in Ann Arbor, agreed in Mohamed. “When you have chalking. President Mark Schlissel a separate interview. “Ann Arbor is very nothing and someone gives you released a statement condemning the welcoming, but there is a dark side to just a little hope, you take it.” The earth laughs in flowers. message on the Diag and stating that it all of us,” he said. “When xenophobic goes against University values to attack Ralph Waldo Emerson rhetoric becomes common, that side Fundamentalism exists in one group – but also saying that the comes out… This chalking couldn’t many groups, but to identify it right to free speech, even speech that have been done without Trump. And in only one group and include wounds, must remain protected. When Spring into worship! Trump himself is the result of a pro- all people similar to that group asked about this response by the Uni- Sundays at cess.” Mohamed went on to explain is a form of stereotyping that 8:00, 9:30, & 11:00 a.m. versity, Farhat said it was frustrating. that, throughout history, we have often leads to distrust and some- 1432 Washtenaw Avenue seen the political rise of someone who Ann Arbor, MI 48104 “It’s frustrating because it gives the times even violence. “If you 734 • 662 • 4466 www.firstpresbyterian.org targets a specific demographic. “They Rev. Dr. Fairfax F. Fair, Pastor University a way to be neutral. Say- are afraid of Islamic religious are not bad people,” Mohamed said of ing that it doesn’t align with values is Trump supporters. “It is easy to blame very different from removing it. It was other people but we have to step away something simple the University could and see the whole picture.” have done.” Need a Pair of Mohamed said he was surprised by how Several student groups at U-M gathered many people came to the recent open on the Diag in solidarity with their house at the Islamic Center of Ann Ar- Muslim neighbors, and another office bor. “Several hundred guests appeared, a s on campus put up a small sign in their Cool Sh de ? including the mayor,” he said. “The love window saying “Muslim students are they showed spoke for itself.” FREE Find it ALL at the CONCERT Kiwanis Thrift Sale! supported by A Portrait of Sousa Relics, treasures, everyday items and one-of-a-kind keepsakes – we’ve got Sunday, May 22 • 2 pm it! Find everything you need while at Michigan Theater giving back to the children in our 603 E. Liberty Street, Ann Arbor, MI community! Relive the era when the concert band Items shown are representative of typical was the king of live entertainment sale items, not actual inventory. at this authentic Sousa-style concert! www.a2kiwanis.org like us on facebook With guest soloists plus guest conductor Marcus Neiman as John Philip Sousa Kiwanis Thrift Sale DOWNTOWN Kiwanis Thrift Sale WEST Reserve your FREE priority seating at Saturdays, 9am-12pm Fri & Sat 9am-1pm WCCBand.org 200 S. First St. at Washington St. 102 N. Staebler Rd. at W. Jackson Rd.

GroundCover_5x5_V1.indd 1 2/15/16 9:51 AM www.GroundcoverNews.orgwww.groundcovernews.com AGENCYFeature SPOTLIGHT 7 Houses and Hearts: helping seniors stay at home by Maria Hagen said Nemerovski. “It’s fabulous. I’m a huge fan!” Located in an unassuming brick building on Plymouth Rd., the Housing If anyone above the age of 55 wants Bureau for Seniors accomplishes work assistance determining the best that is easily overlooked by those whose housing for the future, the Housing lives do not rely on it. This small orga- Bureau offers a number of different nization, a branch of the University of ways to help. The best way to contact Michigan Health System, helps older them is through their website, www. adults – an often forgotten part of our med.umich.edu/seniors, where all the population – either keep the homes that information about their programs they have or transition to a new place. can be found, or simply by calling This immensely difficult task is further them at their office at (734) 998-9339. complicated by the fact that the actions Through a number of assessments, taken are determined by the needs of the Bureau will find the individual the the individual client. place that best serves the homeowner’s needs, whether that includes help “What many people don’t realize is that remembering to take medication or housing truly is a health care issue,” just having company. Every year the said Janet Hunko, head of the Housing Janet Hunko heads the Housing Bureau for Seniors, one of five members of the Bureau puts out a housing guide that fundraising organization, Big Hearts for Seniors. Bureau for Seniors. “If you don’t have shows what is available and what the housing, what else do you have? It’s that The home share program is slightly 80-year-olds who may need more as- requirements are for each place. roof over your head that isn’t about to more complicated because it involves sistance like getting the mail or grocery be taken away from you. It makes ev- “It may be a bit of a wait,” said Hunko. more people. This program is a re- shopping,” she said, adding that she erything else that much easier when you “Unfortunately, money helps people get source for elderly homeowners who only really needed help with mowing have that place. It really is the founda- where they need a lot faster.” need additional income, and for a the lawn, raking leaves, and shoveling tion of health for older adults.” younger person – often a graduate snow. Some waiting periods are up to three The bureau runs a number of programs, student – who is looking for an afford- years long, and there is little help for Because this program involves two mostly focused on helping people stay able place to live. “It’s the most fantas- people needing housing in the mean- strangers getting along in very close in the home that they have. In fore- tic program,” said Margie Nemerovski, time, especially for low-income people quarters, there is an extensive applica- closure prevention, the bureau works who has been a part of the home share who are more likely to end up on wait- tion process that includes questions with a homeowner to keep them from program for seven years. The person ing lists since there are fewer places for about sleeping patterns, temperature losing the house they own due to fall- coming in – the home seeker – helps them to go. preferences and much more, as well as a ing behind on payments. According to with the household tasks in exchange meeting before any decisions are made. Hunko, most of these cases arise from for lower rent while also providing The generation that is now retiring and Once the seeker and the provider both unpaid property taxes because the older the home owner with company and entering assisted living facilities is the agree, they sign a contract for a month, person forgets to pay or because there support. For instance, Nemerovski same generation that was a part of the which can be terminated at any time is a change in household income, often said that she needs someone who is given 30 days’ notice. “It’s set up to re- see HOUSES & HEARTS, page 11 due to the passing of a spouse. A similar social and will talk with her, and only ally help seniors to stay in their homes,” program helps renters who are at risk of requires help with few chores. “I’m not eviction to either stay in their current as old maybe as some of the people in residence or transition to another place. home share. They maybe have some

Big Hearts for Seniors & Honorary Event Chair Ingrid Sheldon Present

ts Big Hears Letter to Anita for Senior How yesterday’s discrimination shaped today’s LGBTQ older adults Thursday, May 26, 2016 at the Michigan Theater

A fundraiser benefiting Ann Arbor Meals on Wheels Housing Bureau for Seniors Remarks by Osher Lifelong Learning Institute Dr. Ronni Sanlo and Jim Toy Silver Club Memory Programs Turner Senior Wellness Program VIP (5:30 pm) and General Admission (6:30 pm) Ticket Information at www.med.umich.edu/geriatrics/BHS or call 734-998-9350

George Bedard and the Kingpins perform at 6:30 pm l Film starts at 7 pm

www.GroundcoverNews.orgwww.groundcovernews.com 8 PUZZLES

Cryptoquote:

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Clue: U = R

Groundcover Vendor Code Bethlehem United Church of Christ While Groundcover News is a nonprofit to or buy papers from other Groundcov- 423 S. Fourth Avenue, Ann Arbor, MI 48104 organization and newspaper vendors er News vendors, especially vendors who 734-665-6149 are considered contracted self-employers, have been suspended or terminated. Bethlehem Church is the home of the Groundcover office

we still have expectations of how vendors • I agree to treat all customers, staff and Sunday Worship Times should conduct themselves while selling and other vendors respectfully. I will not 8:30 am and 10:00 am representing the paper. “hard sell,” threaten, harass or pres- Sunday school at 10:15 am sure customers, staff, or other vendors Fellowship Hour follows each service The following list is our Vendor Code of verbally or physically. Conduct, which every vendor reads • I will not sell Groundcover News under May Community Events – Welcome! and signs before receiving a badge and pa- the influence of drugs or alcohol. pers. We request that if you discover • I understand that I am not a legal May 1 (Sun.) Cake Auction fundraiser, 11:30 a vendor violating any tenets of the Code, employee of Groundcover News but a Concert by the American Guild of Organists, 3:00 please contact us and provide as many details contracted worker responsible for my May 7 (Sat) Concert by the Ann Arbor Youth Chorale, 4:00 as possible. Our paper and our vendors own well-being and income. (For tickets, 996-4404) should be positively impacting our County. • I understand that my badge is property May 8 (Sun.) Happy Mother’s Day of Groundcover News and will not May 14 (Sat.) German Pretzel Sales, 10:30 – 12:00, $1 or $10 dozen All vendors must agree to the following code of deface it. I will present my badge when May 15 (Sun.) Bethlehem Concert Series: conduct: purchasing the papers. • I agree to stay off private property when Gail and Andrew Jennings, 4:00 • Groundcover News will be distributed selling Groundcover News. May 27 (Fri.) German Pretzel Sales, 11:00 – 2:00, $1 or $10 dozen for a voluntary donation of $1, or the • I understand to refrain from selling on May 30 (Mon.) Memorial Day face value of the paper. I agree not to ask public buses, federal property or stores

for more than face value or solicit dona- unless there is permission from the

tions by any other means. owner. • I will only sell current issues of Ground- • I agree to stay at least one block away cover News. from another vendor. I will also abide by • I agree not to sell additional goods or the Vendor corner policy. products when selling the paper or to panhandle, including panhandling with If you see any Groundcover News vendors only one paper. not abiding by the code of conduct, please • I will wear and display my badge when report the activity to: selling papers. [email protected] bethlehem-ucc.org • I will only purchase the paper from 734-707-9210 Groundcover News Staff and will not sell

www.groundcovernews.org POETRY 9 Article to my mother by La Shawn Courtwright Vendor #56 I’m so grateful for my mother. She taught me how to read, write, work, cook, clean, and a lot of valuable lessons about life. I didn’t always take heed of all of the things that she would tell me and I’ve had my share of regrets. I treasure having a mother that I can call and talk to. I can’t and don’t want to think of not having my mom here. We’ve had some ups and down and it wasn’t easy for me to get along with my mom for a number of years. I had to forgive her and myself for us to get back to where we are. There were times that didn’t feel loved and was very rebellious to my mom. If she said “go right,” I’d head left. I realized that I thought I was only hurting myself. It didn’t dawn on me that when I was hurting myself, I was hurting her too. I appreciate and have a newfound respect for my mother than I did earlier in my life’s journeys. I want my mom to know that I wouldn’t change a thing because that’s what made me who I am today. I will honor my mother by being the very best I can be. So, thank you, Mom, for all of the blood, sweat and tears it took to help me be a better me today. Most of all, thank for not giving up on me. I love you always, Mom. A mother’s love Is a many treasured thing And on to her love I cling To hear her voice And see her face Bring much joy to My heart I never want to From her heart be apart She loved me before I knew You may qualify for the Washtenaw How to love myself County Senior Nutrition Program I place her love first To qualify you must be 60 years of age or older Cause it’s like nothing else A mother’s love Is unique in kind When I’m goin’ through somethin’ My dear mother’s teachins come to mind That’s why a mother’s love Is unique Congregate Meals Meals on wheels Like nothing to it - Enjoy meals and activities in a - Hot meals delivered to persons in group setting their homes. Can compare -Participants must be homebound. -Suggested contribution is $3.00 I love my mom - Suggested contribution: $3.00 per per meal meal And for her - You will not be turned away due -A liquid dietary supplement can be to inability to contribute provided for individuals at nutritional I’ll always be there risk Thank you Mom For your loving For more information and directions, please contact Caring WAY Jamila Rahman at: [email protected] or 734-544-2977 To you, for that, Visit us at: http://www.ewashtenaw.org/seniornutrition I wish you a Happy Mother’s DAY!

www.groundcovernews.org 10 THINK ABOUT IT Pound of flesh – a day with a prostitute by William Crandell “I ran out of rock one night and decid- run-ins with law enforcement through- why people wanted to help her – why Groundcover Vendor #328 ed to try posting an ad on Backpages. out her life, having multiple arrests for a I wanted to help her, maybe find her com; it was that simple. I needed to get variety of offenses including shoplifting some kind of treatment. Last week I met a woman named high and I knew another girl who had and drug possession, and has spent a Michelle and it turned into one of the done it.” Now Michele makes between lot of time in jail. “I just put one foot in When I asked her about working the most provocative evenings of my life. $200-500 per night. front of the other every day.” streets, she explained that she had tried it in the past but didn’t like it. One I had stopped by the apartment of When I asked her if she had ever had a We kept driving and talking. By now, place in particular that she avoids is the a friend of mine to see what he was pimp, she “no” and stated that she pre- she had gone on five dates and visited Michigan Avenue Corridor in Ypsilanti, up to and he introduced me to her. I ferred to run her own business. “Why nearly as many dealers’ houses. as it involves having to meet random remember thinking at the time that should I give my money to some man? men and also has a more active police she looked like a soccer mom, with her I smoke up what I make and pay bills. Later that night, we were running out presence. hair in a neat ponytail, conservative I’ve got kids to feed.” of gas and I had very little money to clothing, and the way she kept glanc- put in the tank. We swung into a gas The increased police presence there ing at her phone like she was waiting to Michelle told me that she had been station and I gave her the money I had in recent years is due to the Washt- have to go and pick somebody up. The physically and sexually abused from to take care of the gasoline prepay. enaw County Sheriff’s Department’s two of them had been smoking crack ages six to about 13 by two male mem- Before I knew what was happening, she Enforcement Against Streetwalkers in that night prior to my arrival and even bers of her family. I could tell from the came out of the store with a big smile Ypsilanti program – or, as it is com- though I never used the drug I had look in her eyes she didn’t want discuss explaining that she had gotten a woman monly known, the E.A.S.Y. Program. been around it enough addicts in the the subject anymore, but she did tell me to pitch in three dollars for gas. I asked According to their website, the program late 80s and early 90s to recognize the that she has never received any treat- her how she had accomplished that and was designed to target prostitution chemical smell that permeated the air. ment for the abuse. “At the time nobody I found her answer surprising. She ex- along the Michigan Avenue corridor believed me. Now I look at it as just one plained to me that panhandling was all and in Ypsilanti Township. The idea of After about a half hour of chatting of those things that happen in life,” she about the story. Tonight she was telling the program is to combine law enforce- she asked me for a ride. I had a pretty said. I had a feeling that she has had a people that her husband had threatened ment with human services, the judicial good idea of what she wanted and I lot of those “things” happen to her. to beat her up and I was a kind stranger system and elected officials to not only was immediately intrigued. When she who had offered to drive her home but get prostitutes off the streets but also told me that she wanted me to drive She went on to explain that she has also was out of gas. As she said this, she to help them stay off the streets and her to another friend’s house, I knew I’d been raped and beaten three times in smiled at me, and I noticed just a hint possibly build better lives as well as a guessed right. One thing that I knew for the last couple of years by johns. I asked of pain in her face. I understood then healthier community. But to prostitutes certain about cocaine is that the party her if she had didn’t end until the money ran out, and ever received see PROSTITUTE, page 11 though she kept telling us that she was any treat- broke, I had a strong suspicion that she ment she said had at least a little left. I had nowhere to no – and she be in the morning and I could tell my couldn’t report friend was ready for bed, so I decided them, either, to follow curiosity and agreed to give because of the her a lift. illegal nature of her busi- When we drove away from the house ness. Nonethe- she told me that she worked as a prosti- less, Michelle tute. She also told me she was going on has had a more a date and wanted to know if I would than a few wait for her and then take her home afterwards. Sensing an opportunity, I asked her if I could interview her and she said yes. It turned into one of the most interesting nights of my life.

She agreed to the interview on the terms that she remain anonymous and would only discuss her work as a prostitute and her addiction. She explained that she didn’t want to reveal any more than that for fear of one of her family members discovering her identity. Join us!

I asked her to start at the beginning. As Worship - Sundays 10:00am I drove, I started asking her questions, scribbling down her answers at stop- Hunger meal - Tuesdays 5:30pm lights. She told me that she had chosen Michelle as a fictional name, and that Small groups, campus fellowship, christian education for all ages, service opportunities, musical events. was the alias that she normally worked under. Michelle went on to state that she was 35 years old and had been fbca2.org prostituting for the past few years. She 734-663-9376 explained that getting into prostitution 517 E. Washington was easy for her. Revs. Paul and Stacey Simpson Duke, Pastors

www.groundcovernews.org COMMUNITY 11 Day with a prostitute Houses and Hearts continued from page 10 the end of the evening. When I asked continued from page 7 The Housing Bureau collaborates with Michelle how she feels about prostitut- four other organizations – collectively ing herself, she said, “It’s alright, it’s gay liberation movement of the 1970s. known as Big Hearts for Seniors – to like Michelle, the program just means a Despite this, many older LGBTQ people money, it’s survival you know. I view raise funds. Each of these agencies greater chance of being arrested and her are returning to the closet as they enter my clients as my dates and just a way to focuses on a different facet of aging, relatives finding out about her chosen communities with other older adults, get crack. I have no feelings for them, yet they work together to help people profession. feeling that they would be unwelcome if I mean I wouldn’t date any of them in get the care that they need. Big Hearts they were open about who they are. Our night ended around five a.m. – at my personal life and if I wasn’t doing has been working together for several dates I wouldn’t want to know any of years to raise funds for all of the pro- least for me – but Michelle was still The standard language surrounding planning on going somewhere in a little them because of the sick shit some of grams. Every spring they organize a big retirement and care of the elderly is fundraiser. This year they are hosting a while. Driving home later, I realized them are into. This is about money and extremely heteronormative, always that prostitutes and addicts live in a getting high and taking care of my kids reception and showing a film, A Letter assuming that the partner is of the op- to Anita, at the Michigan Theater on midnight world, guided by an animalis- and nothing else.” I could see her point, posite sex. In order to become more in- May 26, highlighting the importance of tic instinct to feed whatever their souls but from my perspective her habit was clusive, the Housing Bureau for Seniors LGBTQ awareness and acceptance. crave. It’s a naked world under those bleeding her soul $20 at a time and is changing the language that they use, streetlights of people feeding their one night she may not make it home to attempting to get rid of assumptions “A big part of Big Hearts is to create impulses, one where predators rule and those children. that people are heterosexual. awareness for what we all do as well,” anyone could be a victim. It is a world said Hunko. “Yes, it’s a fundraiser but many of us will never see or under- Michelle is not a lazy person, receives “We are open. Our goal is to make this it’s also equally important to get our stand. As another addict once told me, no government assistance and is utiliz- part of the mainstream. This shouldn’t name out there, everyone’s name out “There are no friends among junk- ing the only tools she feels she has. be a conversation, it shouldn’t be an is- Maybe she should be applauded for that there, to say ‘this is what we do and we ies, no partnerships, no brotherhood; sue. It should be everyday,” Hunko said exist and there are resources for older – I don’t know. But the most important everybody steals from everybody – it’s of her organization and others that they adults.’” just part of the game.” Earlier in the thing to remember about Michelle is work with. night, Michelle had echoed that same that she is a survivor. thought when she ANN ARBOR YMCA said “it’s not 400 West Washington Street Ann Arbor, Michigan 48103 about being a www.annarborymca.org professional prostitute, I don’t care JOIN HERE about that, it’s about be- IT’S GOOD FOR ing an addict and doing THE HEART whatever you At the Y, we exist to strengthen community. have to do to Together with people like you, we nurture the get a fix.” potential of kids, help people improve their health, and provide opportunities to support our neighbors. I had saved So join our cause. And create meaningful change not just for your family, but also for your community. the big question till Cryptoquote Solution

My issue isn’t about physical aging; my issue is about wanting to remain vigorous and youthful in my spirit. – Rob Lowe

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www.groundcovernews.org 12 FOOD White Chocolate Macadamia Cookies • by Liz Bauman WHY SHOP CO OP? Groundcover Contributor

A perfect combination of flavors!

Ingredients: 3 cups all-purpose flour 3/4 teaspoon baking soda 3/4 teaspoon salt 3/4 cup white sugar 1 cup packed light brown sugar 1 cup butter, softened 2 eggs 1 tablespoon vanilla extract

LOCALOne coupon per transaction. Must present coupon at the time of 1 cup vanilla baking chips purchase. No other discounts or coop cards apply. Not valid for 1 cup chopped macadamia nuts gift cards, case purchases, beer or wine. $1.00OFF 1 cup dried cranberries ANY PURCHASE OF OFFER EXPIRES 5/31/2016. $8 OR MORE Directions: In a medium bowl, mix together and set aside flour, baking soda and salt. 216 N. FOURTH AVE. Ann Arbor, MICHIGAN Cream together white sugar, light brown sugar and butter (do not use shortening). Phone (734) 994-9174 PEOPLESFOOD.COOP Add slightly beaten eggs and vanilla. Add flour mixture until just mixed. Stir in vanilla chips, macadamia nuts and dried cranberries. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Place on ungreased cookie sheet by small scoop or rounded teaspoon. Bake for 10 minutes or just until set. Remove Groundcover Groove from oven and let cool. A fundraiser for the INSP trip to Greece and for equipment and office supplies for Groundcover vendors featuring Stevie D. and the Wannabees May 6 7pm to 12am at the Club Above at the Heidelberg Inspired by last year’s International Network of Street 18+ only Papers (INSP) Conference, the Groundcover vendor Suggested donation for admission: $10 manager and a longtime volunteer registered to attend Tickets sold in advance and at the door this year’s conference in Athens, Greece. Join us at the Email [email protected] to purchase in advance Heidelberg on the evening of May 6 for live music and to raise money to finance their journey.

Hey! What’s this about you and You know your job is to chase away Well as your mother it’s important Well, when I was younger that squirrel on the balcony?!? those intruding on our special to me that you know your place in outdoor space, right? the world - and it isn’t “figuring out” the world was different!! squirrels!!! I was getting around to it. This is me rolling my That would sound Huh? Yes, I acknowledge eyes Mom. Your even funnier if you seeing a squirrel on the Besides, the squirrel is smart and stays a step away from an anti-squirrel bias is a used your Abe balcony. Are you going escape route. It’s pretty much bit out-dated, though Simpson voice. I know you mean somewhere with this? a standoff as we stare at each Happy Mother’s Day, other trying to figure each well. And what’s this other out. When I twitch the “my place in the Mom! squirrel scurries. world” stuff?!?