MOM, APPLE PIE & WRESTLING Michael DavisMike Klingoman The Sun (1837-1994); Mar 24, 1985; ProQuest Historical Newspapers: The Baltimore Sun pg. SM10

Sgt. Slaughter has Nature Boy where he wants hlm ••• • •• throwing him over In a conlrolled lllp . .

Cue Yard Dog, who, in an unpremeditated jackets and Iron Maiden T-shirts. The kids say wave of patriotism, hurls himself ringsk'e m,e an professional wrestling is camp, sort of lil:e "The MX missile and sprays the contents Qf dlS soda Rocky Horror Picture Show" with C-minus chore­ cup on the suspect Russians. ography. Yard Dog, a scruffy biker type, is immediately Nearer the ring, a man and woman are sharing hustled off by four security men. His army fa­ french fries. The fries and their hair are identical tigues disappear behind a moving patch of blue. colors: half-black, half-brown. Behind them, a But he is remembered by someone in the. crowd. middle-aged, greased-back Elvis cheers bis "You got 'em, Yard Dog, you uneducated 1'-sbirt's namesake: The Boogie Woogie Man. moron, you! USA! USA! USA!" The Boogie Woogie Man, a.k.a. Jimmy Valiant, The crescendo of tired Olympic cheers builds has long blond hair and the name Chewbacca on from this blue-collar anvil chorus. It's Oriole Sec­ the seat of bis pants. He and bis tag-team partner, tion 34, cubed. Bob Backlund, are Good. Their opponents are "These folks are Working Class Only; ain't no­ !!:vii. They are Billy Graham, who is bald, and the body here with a whole lot of money," says Ralph Barbarian. What seem to be pulsating corpuscles Herndon, a 310-pound house detective who, in atop Graham's skull make bis pate look like a blue coveralls, looks like a black Haystacks Cal­ tialf-finished lobotomy, or $2.29 ground round. Mic!iael Davis is sports editor of The Evening houn. He came from Washington for the show, "You could have nightmares about the way the Sun. Mike Klingaman is a sportswriter for The and is sitting amid an odd melange of skullcaps top of his head looks," says Oriole announcer Tom Evening Sun. and USA hats, of Meade High School lettermen's Marr, who is ringside. Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. .•• and sending him hurtling to the mot. Photos bv David Harp The Barbarian, less repugnant, is wearing a year-old grandson Maurice, nicknamed. Bam­ same mustache, same hair (short and bald on choke collar, with studs, and has the equivalent of Bam, balks at attending the matches, "because top), same look (a pouting frown with jutting jaw). a large black tarantula painted over one eye, Nana got hurt." Mr. O'Shea, who is from Randallstown, looks so The Good are not amused. The Boogie Woogie Others are taunting the wrestlers, hoping for much like Slaughter that the Iron Sheik took a Man calls them slimy dogs, and groins both with• their own badge of courage. Fred Creutzer of swipe at him last year. in a five-second span. Good triumphs, in 10:13, Parkville - Dr. X to the crowd - wears a white □ less time than it probably took to apply the Bar­ mask with a black X and barks insults at the ring, The Saturday night security detail earns its barian's makeup. like some yippy chihuahua who gets underfoot. pay at the Civic Center. They're often abused by Grace Johnson, 59, is ecstatic. She lives in Too often, he succeeds. George (the Animal) the customers ("Chicken-bead biters and geeks," Westminster and arrived by bus. Mrs. Johnson Steele, who has a green tongue, once chased him is how one guard described the crowd) and often likes wrestling for "the excitement, the men." up the aisle. "I've been spit at, called names and abusive. Wrestling shows are their anathema. From her second-row seat, she has had both. grabbed," says Mr. Creutzer, who works in a Says one guard: "U wrestling were the only thing Once, Backlund gave her a sweaty hug, staining Mars supermark~t freezer. on TV, I'd turn on the radio." her blouse with his blood. Her granddaughter, Dr. X bas an American flag in bis pocket. It is With courage fueled by alcohol in excess, one Kathy Watson, swooned over the blouse and there to pay tribute, not to tease. "This is for Sgt, sorry patron recently transgressed the tenuous traded for it. Mrs. Johnson got the flowered knit Slaughter," he says softly. "He shook my band at yet perceptible breach between spectator and sweater she always wanted; three years later, the Capital Centre; he's U.S. of A. all the way." performer. "Didn't take an instant before Rowdy Miss Watson still hasn't washed the blouse. As Slaughter's match approaches, the flags Roddy Piper saw the guy coming toward the Last year, Mrs. Johnson - a great-grandmoth• multiply, and Mickey O'Shea becomes more vis­ ring," says Larry Beatty, a world-weary shock er - was hit with a chair thrown by the Samoans. ible, In his Sunny's Surplus uniform, Mr. O'Shea is She received only a sprained knee, but now her 3- a scaled-down clone of Sgt. Slaughter. He has the Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. were dragging the sucker away." The wrestlers certainly don't. forming well and avoiding injury. (A Wrestling's most unfortunate mo­ Backstage the performers have been wrestler recently dodged a misfired ments occur when spectators blm known to kibitz, chain-smoke and dart aimed toward the Civic Center trauma technician who workS many the distinctions between fantasy and share stories of their children and ring by a fan. "It landed right at my a Civic Center card. "Before the guy reality; when they begin to take all the lonely road, not unlike long-haul feet," said usher Bob Greco. "I still even touched the rope, Piper broke the raging bull from ringside toe drivers at a 66 truck stop. They are have the dart at home.") his nose. A second later the police seriously. serious only about two things: per• "The truth is, wrestlers are intel­ ligent, approachable, rational, real people ... and great athletes," says 30-year-old promoter Gary Juster, a backstage heavyweight in the Na­ tional Wrestling Alliance. "We don't have a high percentage of Rhodes Scholars, but we don't have a high percentage of illiterates, either. "When problems arise in arenas, it always strikes me the reason is the wrestlers are professionals while the fans are not," he says. Often a fan incident can change the course of the evening's script. "A villain who senses things are getting out of control will take a fall quickly and end the match," says Gerald Morton, an English and drama pro­ fessor at Auburn University-Mont­ gomery, who was co-author on the recently published tome "Wrestling to Rasslin' " (Popular Press, Bowl­ ing Green State University). "They won't mess around. These guys have been shot at and stabbed before by fans, so they must always take precautions to protect themselves from some fans. But they must do it in such a way as to not turn off the rest of the audience." No one is more aware of the crowd's visceral ebb and flow than Slaughter, the 36-year-old, 6-foot-6, 305-pound ersatz marine. Government ~ecords reveal- Slaughter, a.k.a. Robert Remus, never served time in-the l:J. S. Marine Corps, though he claims to have been a drill instructor from 1966 to 1973. Slaughter dodges all questions about his armed service record - for good reason. "We've been 'interested' in Slaughter for a couple of years, since he began using our parapher­ nalia, but the guy has been very elu­ sive," says Capt. Jay Farrar, of the Public Affairs Office of the U.S. Ma­ rine Headquarters in Washington. Captain Farrar's office has received 50 complaints in the past year from true-blue marines, citing Slaughter's abuse of the uniform. "What they really didn't like - and we know of two such cases - is when his oppo­ nents staged attacks on people wearing dress blue uniforms, whom we strongly believe were not ma­ rines. Then Slaughter came in and rescued the guys. " However, the USMC could do lit­ tle (until last fall, when Congress passed a law prohibiting the use of the Marine Corps emblem and insig­ nia by civilians). "That gave us re­ course to fight back," says Captain Farrar, whose office fired off a let­ ter de:nanding that Slaughter stop because his actions "reflect discred­ it on those who have served." Nei­ ther Slaughter nor his former Con­ necticut agent, Mark Sotichek, ever Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. Slaughter holds Nature Boy In a head lock. replied. lion's jingoistic frenzy, the Slaughter "Our next step is to try and get character, a Bad Guy turned Good the U.S. attorney's office involved," Guy, has become, in effect, an says Captain Farrar. "From a pub­ American Phenomenon. (Expect the lic relations standpoint, it may not story in USA Today soon.} "It's nice be worth the effort. You've got to to walk down the aisle now and have look at this broad-minded. Sgt. people shaking my hand instead of Slaughter isn't a bad guy. He's spitting on me," he says. "That trying to uphold good things. But abuse gets old." he's abusing something that marines Since its earliest days, the plot­ hold near and dear to us, just for lines of wrestling's passion play showmanship." have been directed by political and Slaughter's reponse? "We have no cultural swings. comment on that," said Maria Pass­ "After World War II, the sneaky erelli, his secretary-booking agent in Japanese and the Nazi Germans Westport, Conn. were standard villains," says Mor­ Slaughter was born August 27, ton. "Now, new national foes like the 1948, and grew up in Eden Prairie, Iranians and the Russians have Minn., a southwest suburb of Min­ given birth to new confrontations." neapolis. From all reports he was an You can't attend a wrestling card unremarkable (save for his stature}, these days and not exl?.llCt to find well-mannered student at Eden bogus Russian villains, like Ivan and Prairie High. Nikita Koloff or Nikolai Volkoff, Slaughter is recalled fondly by scheduled in a feature match. The John Ryski, his football line coach, dreaded 305-pound Volkoff, who reg­ as being "a quiet, shy kid who didn't ularly is pelted with produce, begins particularly like contact sports at each match by singing "Hymn of the first. He was never muscular, but Soviet Union," the Soviet national from hs sophomore year on he was anthem, in a voice that Ra:t. Diding­ awfully big and awfully strong." er of the Philadelphia Daily News Legend has it "Big Bob" broke off wrote "would clear Red Square on an arm of a seven-man practice sled May Day." one day. "Aw, it was rusted," Mr. Thus, the satisfactions of pro Ryski remembers him saying. wrestling in these nationalistic After high school Slaughter times are lip-smacking good to com­ worked for his father's roofing busi­ monfolk: They not only see us win ness and then became a barber. He the battle of the Superpowers at broke into wrestling in 1974 after at­ ringside, they witness a character tending a camp in Minnesota run by like Sgt. Slaughter twist Uncle ex-wrestler Verne Gagne. That was Ivan's arm until he says "uncle." back in a time when the military As Morton told the Los Angeles was in disfavor. Now, Slaughter is Times: "Wrestling is such a broad cresting majestically on the coun­ spectacle or drama, it plays itself try's current nationalistic wave. out like a soap opera does. It can Slaughter appealed to Republican change quickly to react to current leaders - to no avail - to allow events. It is not confined by intellec­ him to recite the Pledge of Alle­ tual concerns and it can do what its giance at an Inaugural Ball last audience wants it to do. January. "If Mr. T can be Santa "Wrestling will put in the ring the Claus at the White House, then Sgt. representation of our greatest night­ Slaughter ought to be allowed to re­ mares and then try to destroy them. cite the Pledge," he reasoned. Thanks to geopolitics and the na-

Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. Above, Fred Creutzer, a.k.a. Dr. X, cheers on the wrestlers. Al right, youngster ot ringside clutches American flag. Patriotism Is a molar Iheme of many wrestling matches.

That's why people go, be­ cause they're willing to buy that. Evil is simple enough for them that it can be rep­ resented. It's cathartic." Slaughter crossed the metaphysical brink between Evil and Good on a night in 1983 when he overpowered the Iron Sheik in Allentown, Pa., a pig-iron city where the scars of unemployment are all too visible. It was the perfect setting for the fiery eruption that would propel Slaughter clear out of Hades. Or Allentown, at least. The moment of transmu­ tation was both preposter­ ous and ingenious. Promot­ ers had claimed that the Iron Sheik, a scuzzy fiend who formerly fought as the Sheik, presumably in his pre-Geritol days, was de­ scended from a line of wild­ eyed Iranians. He was said to be a distant cousin of the "kooks who had held Our Boys hostage in Eye-ran!" Before the match, the Iron Sheik waved a flag Fans cheer defeat or Nature Boy (hrs !eel can be seen lower right). bearing the likeness of Aya- Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. tollah Ruhollah Khomeini. He appears to have a era! and MTV in particular. Slaughter countered by un­ heart proportionate to his Three of the top l O pro­ furling Old Glory and un­ massive frame. He says he grams on cable during Octo­ locking the gates of wrath. is a favorite son of Vietnam ber were wrestling shows on "I stood up for America that veterans, and that the sun­ either the USA Network or night," says Slaughter, "just glasses he always has on his Superstation WTBS, accord­ like everybody in the hall person were among the per­ ing to Advertising Age. wanted to." sonal effects of a service­ MTV and McMahon have Ever since, it's been the man who was killed in formed a marriage of con­ Sgt.'s stripes forever pound­ Southeast Asia. They were venience, co-promoting ing in the hearts of his legion given to Slaughter by the wildly successful rock 'n' fans. He gets fan mail by the man's school-age son in At­ roll challenge matches at gunnysack delivered to the lanta. Madison Square Garden and Connecticut headquarters of Clearly, he has a soft spot elsewhere. Cobra Inc. USA, Slaughter's for young people. This night, In February, MTV pro­ corporate barracks. Fathers be would pose for snapshots moted and televised 'the line up to have their sons with two young boys, war to settle the score," a photographed with him. minutes before entering the comic book come to life, be­ "Mothers have asked him to ring. "He is a good kids' per­ fore a Garden sellout of baptize their babies, and son," says Larry Beatty, the 22,000. Like Popeye defend­ others swear he has healing medic. "I've seen him stop ing Olive Oyl, WWF cham­ powers," says Passerelli, and give autographs to chil­ pion Hulk Hogan - uphold­ who books Slaughter's dren at almost the moment ing the dignity of that flower travel, answers the mail and he steps out of the ring. If I of maidenly virtue, Cyndi fields the ever-growing com­ had just spent 20 minutes in Lau_per - fought to a draw mercial offers being thrust the ring with a 400-pound agamst the evening's Bluto, his way. guy who was acting like be Rowdy Roddy Piper. What Examples? This year, wanted to make 8 ounces of prompted these wrestling Hasbro Industries discus,;ed orange juice out of me, I'm vidiots to duel was Piper's creating Sgt. Slaughter ac­ not sure I would be ready to effrontery of breaking one tion figures as part of the talk to anybody for a while." of Lauper's gold records G.I. Joe merchandise line. For his la hors, both in over the head of Capt. Lou Slaughter, a budding record­ and out of the ring, Slaugh­ Albano. The latter, a former ing artist, already has cut a ter likely will make an esti­ wrestler-turned-manager, 45 on the Camouflage label mated $250,000 to $500,000 played Lauper's overweight and intends to follow with this year, vaulting him into and overwrought father in an album. ("He wants to do wrestling's select company the Lauper video, "Girls a couple of ballads and a of perhaps a dozen million­ Just Want To Have Fun." few recital numbers," says aires-in-the-making. He took The WWF claims that "35 Passerelli, who would not an Andre the Giant-sized percent of all young people disclose whether Slaughter's step toward financial inde­ in America, 18 to 34, are warblings recall John pendence recently by break­ proud to call themselves Wayne or Wayne Newton.) ing away contractually from wrestling fans.'' MTV, which Slaughter says he worked second-generation promoter wants to be the nation's pur­ every day of 1984, except Vince McMahon, whose veyor of sex, song and sock, New Year's Eve and Christ­ World Wrestling Federation believes if you have wres­ mas Eve, and will allow no is by far the country's most tling in your soul, it's likely letup in '85. "The only states powerful. you have rock - or is it I haven't wrestled in are The wrestling industry, rocks? -, in your head. Alabama and Utah," he says which generates an estimat­ There is a distinction be­ with regret. "But I'll be ap­ ed $250 million annually, tween the wrestling specta­ pearing in Salt Lake City thrives in what sociologists tor and the wrestling view­ soon ... and I've invited the might call a closed society. er. An Advert-I.sing Age whole Osmond family to Its leaders operate in virtual survey in July revealed 45 come out!'' obscurity, their movements percent of the cable TV Spend an hour with Sgt. all but undetected. As with viewers were 18 to 34. Four• Slaughter and you walk the mob, secrets just don't teen percent attended col­ away wondering where his leak easily. "If only our CIA lege, 13 percent earn more act begins and ends, since he were as controlled and en­ than $40,000 a year and 11 seems to slip in and out of closed," sighs author Mor­ percent are professionals. his public persona easily. ton, "our country would be Watching wrestling on cable "It's like a politician, or in better shape. has almost become a Yuppie anyone else who comes in "And when you under­ holy obligation. contact with the public," stand the jockeying that Wrestling whips college says promoter Juster. "You goes on between the three basketball by a 3-to-1 mar­ hear the adulation all the top promoters (Juster's gin in the ratings on USA time, and after a while you NWA, McMahon's WWF and Network, and the audience begin to believe it all." the Midwest's American appears to be growing. The Slaughter says he is a Wrestling Alliance} you can nation's No. 1 cable show is patriot and "a throwback to begin to see bow vicious this USA's "Wrestling TNT," a the old-time athlete. I don't business can be," he says. bizarre wrestling news-and­ smoke, I don't do drugs and I Wrestling, the nation's talk show taped in Owings drink only occasionally." He No. 3 spectator sport behind Mills. It ts what TV would says he often speaks to auto racing and horse rac­ be like if the Bomb fell and school groups and has ing, has been a consistent mutants took over the sta­ worked with the disadvan­ draw for decades. But the tions. taged. He has helped raise sport is in the midst of a The TNT set is so tacky it money for the restoration of giddy television resurgence, the Statue of Liberty. thanks to cable TV in gen-

Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. could trap horseflies. It has the standard desk, couch and urban backdrop of the "Tonight" show, but the Manhattan skyline hanging behind host Vince McMahon appears to have been fash­ ioned by somebody's Cub Scout den mother. TNT's patter is so vulgar and brainless it inspired critic James P. Breig of the Long Island Catholic to write: "Picture Johnny Car­ son on steroids and with a lobotomy and you have some idea of what TNT is like." But the Friday night show is seen in 1.4 million homes weekly and is consid­ ered a white-hot TV proper­ ty. Why? Because it has a unique sense of chaos. Last fall, they televised the na­ tion's first triple-ring cere­ mony. Wrestlers Butche~ Paul Vachon and Diane Page exchanged vows on the mat, then they exchanged blows with some of the invit­ ed guests, including the Wild Samoans. It degenerated into a brawl, climaxing with the lovely bride being pelted with a coconut cream pie. She got her just desserts. Slaughter, whom some merchandisers see as an alabaster Mr. T, is himself a made-for-TV caricature. When time allows he contin­ ues to make local TV car­ dealership commercials, as he does for Larry's Chevro­ let, for small truckloads of money. There bas been talk of including the Sgt. Slaugh­ ter character in a Saturday morning action cartoon show. "Sgt. Slaughter knows the time is right to make it now while he can," says author Morton. "In wrestling, any­ thing can happen. He could get injured and have his ca­ reer ended overnight. And you always have to worry about the fans. They are fickle, and could turn on him at any time." This night, at a stop in Baltimore, in a match for "the NWA champeenship of the world," the fans are turned on to him. D The Sarge enters first, marching in to "The Ma­ rine Hymn" and glad­ handing like a politician. Mickey O'Shea gets his wild­ est wish: The two Sgt. Slaughters face and salute one another.

Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission. mere are pocKetS 01 nate. :some• Sgt. Slaughter raises the cham­ "Bull-! Bull-!" out, didn't you? The Sgt's gonna get one yells, "Hey, Gomer!" A placard pionship belt. Whistles blow. Fists, Briefly, they tangle again in the a Texas Death Match and whip reads, Slaughter the Sergeant. These both white and black, go skyward, ring, and the Sgt. parades out with a hita" people are craning to see Ric Flair, but only momentarily, because now satisfied look and the belt he'll have The crowd of nearly 6,000 isn't a.k.a. Nature Boy, the champion the Sgt. bas been disqualified for to give back. "Flair's got more particularly happy, but America who rides in on an electronic carpet throwing Nature Boy out of the ring. money, he paid somebody off," didn't lose. It only got screwed. of rock music, in a long white robe The generic crowd reacts according­ growls the marine from Camp Han­ There's a difference, in pro wres­ with pink sequined butterflies. The ly. sen. "You saw who carried the belt tling as ill life. II hair is platinum. He is Barry Mani­ low-brow. Unperturbed by the dazzle, the Sgt. begins to disrobe: first the hat, then the shirt, which he burls at the darkened crowd. It is caught by a man in the eighth row. What will he do with the keepsake? "Wash it first," says Jerry Allen. The match begins, and it is the Sgt. who has the upper hand. His hand is in Flair's hair, messing about as if searching for fleas. Na• ture Boy feigns insult, and a mo­ ment later he Is parallel with the floor, caught in a headlock and kick­ ing his feet like a 6-year-old who has to go to the bathroom. Bad. But Flair gets up. as he must, and whacks the challenger's throat with karate chops - once, twice, three times. Then he throws the Sgt. out of the ring, where he lays at the feet of ageless Lena Warner, of Glen Burnie. "Get in there, you jackass you!" screams Mrs. Warner, who makes a meoacing gesture toward him. Three ushers move in on Warn­ er. The Sgt. recovers. But what is this, blood? Is the Sgt. bleeding? The ooze cues the chant. "USA! USA! USA!" Now Nature Boy has the Sgt. in a headlock, and his face is purple, and a marine in a Camp Hansen T-shirt is screaming, and Mickey O'Shea's sunglasses are steaming. First the hockey team in Sarajevo, and now this? But the Sgt. breaks free, and delivers the Slaughter Cannon, which is like a triple windup by Eddie Feigner, and suddenly Nature Boy is outside the ring. And defeat­ ed. Reproduced with permission of the copyright owner. Further reproduction prohibited without permission.