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Expectations of Pastoral Leadership January 2017 Seventh Edition Under 2016 Book of Discipline A REFERENCE FOR PASTORS AND STAFF/PASTOR PARISH RELATIONS COMMITTEES Page 32 Page HELPFUL HINTS FOR PROBLEM-SOLVING This booklet contains guidelines which reflect traditions and practices of the Illinois Great Rivers Conference. This booklet has been approved by the Bishop and Cabinet of The Illinois Great Rivers Conference of The United Methodist Church for use in local churches. Additional booklets may be obtained from your District office, or Be yourself may be photocopied. Speak only for yourself (Use “I” statements) Be honest Speak the truth in love Address behavior, not the person Let the other finish his/her thought before you speak Remember that conflicts are problems to be solved, not con- tests to be won. Remember that a person is usually a part of the problem if they’re not a part of the solution. Remember that no one is perfect and that we’re all doing the best we can with what we have been given. “Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. (Philippians 2:14-16) Page 2 Page 31 THE DRAMA OF TRIANGULATION Triangulation is a destructive pattern of relating to others TABLE OF CONTENTS Page in which a person identifies with one or three roles and invites 1. A Mutual Ministry 4 others to play the other two. There are multiple payoffs for playing 2. A New Model 4 any one of the roles, but the main one for each is avoidance of 3. Four Essential Leadership Functions 4 one’s own issues. We have all unknowingly played each part at 4. Understanding Pastoral Changes 6 one time or another, although one role may feel most comfortable 5. How Itineracy Works 7 to us. A mature person in Christ is able to identify when he/she is 6. The Change of Pastors 10 playing one of these roles and takes ownership and control of the 7. Job Descriptions 12 issues that rightly belong to him or herself and no one else. 8. Division of Hours in Multiple Point Charges 13 9. “Working” Hours 13 The victim in the drama is seen by self and/or others to be 10. Worship and Sacramental Leadership 14 weak, injured, or suffering injustice. The savior is seen by self 11. Weddings and Funerals 15 and/or others as the “hero” who intervenes to rescue the “victim” 12. Supervision 15 from the real or imagined problem. The 13. Sabbath 16 Persecutor persecutor is the one seen by self and/or 14. Accessible for Emergencies 16 others to be “the heavy,” harassing or op- 15. Clergy Self-Care 17 pressing the “victim” with real or perceived 16. Clergy Family Care 17 ill treatment. These three roles work to- 17. The Pastor’s Family 17 gether to sustain any drama of triangula- 18. The Parsonage 18 tion. Victim Savior 19. Housing Allowance 19 S/PPRCs are often enlisted as 20. Financial Matters 20 “saviors” by church folk who see themselves as powerless (i.e., un- 21. Mileage 21 able to confront or be honest with a staff member) or by pastors 22. Consulting on Vacation Dates 21 and staff who see themselves as victimized by supervisors or un- 23. Educational Requirements 22 reasonable people around them. The response of the S/PPRC to 24. Camping and Evangelistic Responsibilities 23 such situations is to encourage and expect the “persecutor” and 25. Connectional Responsibilities 23 the “victim” to deal face-to-face with each other, participating in 26. Pulpit Supply 23 the direct resolution of their issues, and thereby ending triangula- 27. Sick Days 24 tion. 28. Family and Personal Days 24 29. Annual Conference 24 S/PPRCs sometimes play the role of “victim” by asking their 30. Former Pastors 24 Superintendent (“savior”) to intervene in conflict before they have 31. Problem-Solving & Conflict Resolution 25 worked Steps 1-3, described in the previous section. The Superin- 32. The Drama of Triangulation 30 tendent is willing to help counsel the S/PPRC about conflict man- 33. Helpful Hints for Problem-Solving 31 agement if called, but will ask what steps have already been taken in the local church by the parties involved. Page 30 Page 3 STEP FOUR: (verse 17a continued) If the pastor is involved, the next A MUTUAL MINISTRY: A pastor is one of many leaders in the step is to once again broaden the base of those who help the church, which is the Body of Christ. All baptized Christians are offender hear the concern by involving a denominational repre- expected to exercise leadership according to the spiritual gifts sentative—the District Superintendent. The DS can arrange to visit they have been given. A pastor’s gifts include the abilities of with S/PPRC and parties involved. Goals of the work remain the preaching and teaching the Word of God, nurturing Christians in same. their faith, leading congregations in visioning and goal setting, and equipping members of the local congregation to fulfill the DS vision and mission. Beyond those particular gifts, a pastor will have other specific gifts which are unique to their own faith and X journey. S/ O PPRC A NEW TESTAMENT MODEL: Congregations need to recognize that changing times have called forth a “new” model of pastoral leadership which focuses on a pastor-centered, pastor- dependent church life. Based on practices of the New Testament NOTE: It is not the practice or polity of United Methodists to church, this model of pastoral leadership involves: hold all-church meetings for problem-solving or to pass peti- tions for support of a particular cause. * Teaching disciples how to reach out in the name of Jesus Christ * Nurturing disciples in their journey of discipleship. STEP FIVE: (verse 17b) Someone who does not know about the life * Sending disciples into the world to be the church and teachings of Christ may assume that letting someone be “as a Gentile or tax-collector” means ending the relationship. Christians know that these are precisely the persons that Jesus was most in- FOUR ESSENTIAL LEADERSHIP FUNCTIONS: The new model of tentional about seeking. What this verse does suggest is that there spiritual leadership includes four essential leadership functions. may come a time when the offending party needs a clear state- Fulfilling these functions must be the pastor’s highest priority. ment from the church that certain behaviors cannot be tolerated 1. Helping people discover and name the current reality in and that they may need to remove themselves from the gathered which they live. With the pastor’s leadership we answer the community until their behavior is in greater compliance with Chris- question,“ Where are we in the here and now?” tian community values. 2. Discerning, naming and casting the shared vision. Together we reflect on the question, “What is the positive future to which God is calling this church, this community, and God’s world?” Page 4 Page 29 STEP TWO: (verse 16) If the problem is not solved by Step One, 3. Developing bridges. Pastoral leadership is called to help the the offended person (X) brings a witness with them. In United congregation plan actions and develop systems that enable Methodist Churches, S/PPRC members are elected to be reconcil- the church to cross the bridge between the current reality ing agents and interpreters. The offended person may ask for a S/ and shared vision. PPRC member to go with him/her to assist with the conversation or ask another party. Before matters come to the S/PPRC as a 4. Monitoring the journey. Pastoral leadership keeps an eye on whole, the offended party must include a S/PPRC member in a the whole of the faith journey of the congregation, stepping two (or three)-on-one conversation. back from the “busy-ness” of constant doing to paying attention to the big picture. X O Fulfilling these four tasks, in addition to leading worship, will be a full-time job for a pastor. Expecting a pastor to do all the rela- S/ tional and administrative work of the church (shut-in calling, PPRC hospital visits, evangelism, etc.) limits the ministry of the entire congregation. For God has called the laity, not just the clergy, to perform these ministries every day as representatives of Christ and the Church. It is reasonable to expect that pastors will give STEP THREE: (verse 17a) At this point the S/PPRC as a whole personal leadership in the development of congregational sys- (representing the church) is involved. The offended party needs to tems which provide a full range of ministries employing the gifts be present at the meeting with the one who has offended long of each disciple/member. enough to state the concern and summarize the efforts to resolve the problem on his/her own. To do otherwise is for the S/PPRC to risk “triangulation” with committee members trying to speak for the offended party and often second-guessing what the real issues are in the event there is more than one offended party, each may meet for a time with the S/PPRC in the presence of the one who has offended, one-by-one. The goals of all involved at this point still remain reconciliation, building up the church, personal growth, and learning to live with less than perfect coworkers in Christian community.
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