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Thousands of documents and photos are languishing in trunks, attics and forgotten drawers in private homes and basements. Now is the time to retrieve this precious material­ before it becomes dust instead of history.

Your help-the public's help-is needed in this effort. Do you have any relevant old photos, documents, or records?

THE CATEGORIES OF ITEMS REQUESTED:

• Documentation of Orthodox ,Jewish rescue work dur­ "' Document<;: and photos pertaining to Orthodox activ~ ing the Holocaust. ism in the social service and civic action fields. • Photos depicting life in the shtetl, the Orthodox com­ ~ Photos of Gedolei Yisroel past and present. munities of the eities, the yeshiva world, and Chassidic • Sets of Orthodox journals and periodicals. centers of Europe before the Holocaust. • Documents and photos relating to the religious Yishuv '" Documents, records 1 letters, 'journals and newspapers in Eretz Yisroel 1 its institutions and struggles for that portray Turah life in Europe as it was, and cast Jewish life. light on the issues and problems facing Jews at the time. • Documents and photos pertaining to world-wide Agudath Israel hisfllry, all Knessios Gedolos, and the "' Documenl<>, records 1 correspondence, newsclippings, development of the American Agudah movement since journals, memorahilia, and phows depicting Orthodox 1922. life in the U.S. from colonial times to the present. ({f you arr hesitant to pa.rt with cheri._<;hidiU>m..i;, arrange· .. Documents and photos pertaining to the development me11t.s can bf' m.adt' fo reproduce certain kind.<; of documents of yeshivos throughout the country. and phfJtos, leaving the original in your pos,-;ession.)

AS A COMMUNITY, WE MUST PRESERVE THIS LEGACY THAT WILi. OTHERWISE BE LOST TO FUTURE GENERA'l'IONS.

If you have any items in the above categories in your possession, or know where they can be obtained, please write or phone: ORTHODOX JEWISH ARCHIVES Agudath Israel of America 84 William Street, New York, N.Y. 10038, 212-797-9000 R

THE JEWISH OBSERVER (ISSN) 0021 ·6615 is published monthly except July and August by the Agudath Israel of America, 84 W\lllam Street, New York, N.Y. 10038. Second class postage paid in New York, N.Y. Subscription $22.00 per year; two years, $36.00; three years, $48.00. Outside of the United States (US funds drawn on a US bank only) $12.00 surcharge per year. Singlecopy$3.00; foreign $4.00. Send address 4 changes to: The Jewish Observer, 84 William Street, N.Y., N.Y. 10038. Tel: (212) 797·9000. The Making of an Educated Kashrus Consumer Printed in the U.S.A. Rabbi Yaakov Reisman RABBI NISSON WOLPIN, EDITOR 8 EDITORIAL BOARO DR. ERNST L. BODENHEIMER The Sword And The Sefer Chairman THE LIFE AND LEGACY OF RABBI MoRDECHAI WEINBERG, ?")IT

RABBI JOSEPH ELIAS Rabbi Yaakov Feitman JOSEPH FRIEDENSON RABBI NOSSON SCHERMAN 13

MANAGEMENT BOARD When Children Are Poisoned With Criticism... AVIFISHOF Miriam Adahan NAFTOLI HIRSCH ISAAC KIRZNER RABBI SHLOMO LESIN 18 NACHUM STEIN "Whose Homework Is it, Anyway?" RABBI YOSEF C. GOLDING Eliyahu Mayer BU$iness Manager

Published by Agudath Israel of America Second Looks: RABBI MOSHE SHERER PRESIDENT SCA AT THE CROSSROADS

SOLE U.S. TRADE DISTRIBUTOR EUROPEAN REPRESENTATIVE Feldheim Publishers M.T. Bibelman Postscript: 200 Airport Executive Park Grosvenor Works Spring Valley. N.Y. 10977 Mount Pleasant Hill "WHEN WOMEN'S PRAYERS ARE WELL RECEIVED .. '" London E5 9NE. ENGLAND ISRAEU DISTRIBUTOR AUSTRALIAN DISTRIBUTOR Hechemia Rosenberg Gold's Book & Gift Co. 26 Kiryat Telshe Stone, 108A 36 William Street And Thou Shalt Love O.N. Harei Yehuda. ISRAEL Balaclava 3183. Vic., AUSTRALIA Libby Lazewnik

THE JEWISH OBSERVER does not assume responsibility for the Kashrus 27 of any product, publication, or service Letters to the Editor advertised in its pages ©Copyright 1993 37

APRIL 1993 Dateline: VOLUME XXVt I NO. 3 NEWS FROM AGUDATH ISRAEL Rabbi Yaakov Reisman

YOUARETHEFINALAUTHORITY that although hashgachos are essen­ commands to distinguish between tial (they communicate information to that which is permitted and that en we talk of the Kashrus the consumer). the process does not which is prohibited to eat. It would ene, we think of the entire stop there. The consumer must re­ seem, then, that the mere research w.alphabet of codes. the ceive the information, evaluate it, and into permitted and prohibited foods is plethora of Kashrus symbols, the full then act upon on it. The educated con­ in keeping with the wishes of the To­ range of supervising agencies. We sumer can make all the dtfference in rah, quite apart from the information also think of the producers, the food the world. He can accept or reject one gains regarding what one may or handlers. and the providers. But we shoddy merchandise-and sloppy may not put into one's mouth. When leave out what is perhaps the most Kashrus supervision. The laws ofsup­ one studies and investigates the ac­ important ingredient-the consumer. ply and demand can apply to quality ceptability of foods. one is mekayem For except for the kal. who will accept hashgachaas they do to specific prod­ mitzvos asei. anything (even the butcher shops ucts. Witness, for example, the prolif­ with signs that call out -w:i -w:i). we eration of Cholov Yisroel dairy prod­ STARTING Nr THE BEGINNING: regularly make decisions as to what ucts and glatt Kosher meats in re­ THE HECHSHER we will accept and what we will not. sponse to consumer demand. People must eat every day. several The consumer's role as a key his article will attempt to times a day. Whenever someone puts player in the Kashrus scene would, present a basic outline of a morsel of food into his mouth, he­ on its own, make it incumbent upon T some of the things one must ar she-is making a halachic decision the consumer to learn and become an learn to become an educated con­ that the item is Kosher. It follows, then, educated consumer. There is, how­ sumer. The starting point of every in­ ever, another reason why one should vestigation into Kashrus is the Rabbi Reisman, who is Rav of Agudath Israel of learn as much as possible about the hechsher. At present, the biggest Long Island, is connected With the Association for Kashrus of available products: The hechsher in the world can be found Reliable Kashrus, a supervising agency. His Rambam in the beginning of Hilchos on the street corners of cities in every ~School and Home: Partners or Adversaries?tt ap­ Maacholos Asuros lists four positive country on every continent on earth. peared in JO May '88.

4 The Jewish Observer. April 1993 It covers the whole gamut of volved, as well as other halachic fac­ Rabbanim. The agencies are not Kashrus-the manufacturer, the tors in the hechsher. The Rav bound to them, so they can do as the packer, the restaurant-eveiything. It hamachshir or supervising agency young girl did, and shop around for a is called "Reb Alleh." Who checked has to be the type of authority you Rav with a lenient approach. into it? Reb AUeh: "AUeh esseTL .. AUeh would ask your other she'eilos. You •Company B has a hashgacha but koifeTL Everyone is buying and eating must ask yourself, "What are my has violated the terms set by the the product, so I am buying and eat­ standards? Am I a 60, or 80, in other agency a number of times. The ing it, too." areas of halacha?" hashgachaagency says, ''You will lose A prominent out-of-town Rosh Ye­ When you see a particular symbol our certification," to which the com­ shiva attended a New York wedding. or hechsher, do you know the posetk pany says, "I'll find a different When the meal began. the Rosh Yeshiva behind that symbol? Would you be hashgacha." Or if the hashgachade­ asked the person to his right, 'Men ken embarrassed to introduce this person mands changes in a certain product, doh essen ?" The guest shrugged his to your guests at your wedding or bris the company may say, "No other shoulders and turned to the fellow next as the person under whose authority hashgacha demands it; so I can go to to him with the same question. And so it they are eating? If the answer to this someone else if you won't give the went around the table. until thefellow at question is "yes," then perhaps you hechsher." In contrast to days gone the left of the Rosh Yeshiva asked htm shouldn't be serving his food. by, when the Rav set the criteria for 'Menken doh essen7' So the Rosh Yeshiva picked himself up and asked the chassan's father re­ The educated consumer can make all the difference gordmg the acceptability ofthe catering. who turned lo themechuten and put the in the world. He can accept or reject shoddy question to him "Alleh essen doh!-Ev­ eryone eats here!" he replied, sweeping merchandise-and sloppy Kashrus supervision. The his hand across the ha1L People seem to believe that com­ laws of supply and demand can apply to quality munities are a hechsher. "I bought ~~'· this in Boro Park." "I picked it up in hashgacha as they do to specific products. New York." The previous Skverer Rebbe once remarked, ''The yeitzer hara (evil in­ MOVING TARGETS Kashrus, today everyone else but the clination) doesn't need a passport to Rav seems to be doing so: either the get into New Square." Entzy is unob­ mother asks her daughter to certifying agency, or the store owner structed. The community per seis not take a chicken of questionable who chooses a hashgacha to his lik­ a hashgacha. A Kashrus to the Rav. The ing, which could be the one who So an educated consumer wants daughter goes to the first Rav who checks the least, who is most lax, or to know who is responsible-who is says. "Not Kosher." The second also is the cheapest. giving the hechsher. says, "Not Kosher." As does the third. I would say that the best situation The fourth says, "Kosher," and she in hashgacha is when the owner is KNOW YOURSELF returns home and tells her mother, frum, shomer Shabbos, is impec­ ''The chicken is Kosher!" Is it? Would cable in terms of integrity and hon­ nee we know that we need a you eat such a chicken? esty, and will go along with the baal hechsher, we have to decide We have comparable situations all hamachshir. In such cases, yotzei 0 which hechsher we will rely the time. A company is seeking a v'nichnas--drop-in supervision­ upon. Kashrus is not a matter of hash9acha. so the CEO turns to would be adequate. passing and failing basic rules, as hashgacha Aleph. The hashgacha might apply to select. non-academic agency says, 'Tm sorry-I see from KNOW THE MASHGIACH subjects in high school. Most sub­ your ingredients that I can't give you a jects do cany grades for different lev­ hashgacha." The company continues mashglach is an auditor, simi­ els of mastery. So too in Kashrus are on to hashgachaBeis, who says,"No." lar to a CPA. To certify that there different levels of reliability, Hashgacha Gimmel also says, "No"­ A something is Kosher, one ranging from failing to 100%, with 70, but hashgacha Daled says "Yes." ... must be competent In many fields. 80, and 90 in between. You, the con­ And you end up buying it. Each field is an area of expertise unto sumer, must know what the stan­ In years gone by, the Rav of the itself. He must know the ingredi­ dards are that you maintain in other kehilla was in control of the butchers, ents-their chemical makeup, their areas of halacha, and then find out and the Kashrus in town, in general: background, their source. He must about the standards of the supervis­ you knew what he stood for, and he set know halacha, and recognize a ing Rav or organization. You must the standard. The butcher and she'eila when one arises. He must know the degree of shaas hadchak shochetwere bound to the Rav. Today, know the nature of the business he (extenuating circumstances) in- we have certifying agencies which hire is certifying. He must know the

The Jewish Obseroer, April 1993 5 manufacturer, the systems of manu­ whether or not the item or situation facturtng. is Kosher. A mashgiach may be a Would you be embar­ Many products have their own in­ freelancer, engaged by the owner. tricacies: if one is certifying a butcher Rather than report. he renders deci­ rassed to introduce this shop, he must know nikkur (de-vein­ sions, as machshir (unless he con­ ing and removing the sciatic nerve sults with some halachlc authority). person to your guests at your and certain "fats") and other skills. A Some organizations display cards bakery calls for its own specialized stating that their hashgacha is being wedding or bris as the per­ expertise with its own array of ingre­ used, and they are setting the stan­ dients and attendant problems. Res­ dards of Kashrus and supervision. If son under whose authority taurants, take-out food, catering­ you see an individual mashgiach each has its own constellation of without any organizational label, it they are eating? If the an­ traps, trials and tribulations. The could be that he is at this assignment mashgiach must know the individual on his own. You must determine what swer to this question is "yes," establishment, the equipment being his standards are, and at which used and its purpose, and how to stages in the food preparation his su­ then perhaps you shouldn't kasher it. He must be tough: When pervision is in effect. someone undergoes an IRS audit, a be serving his food. fear sets in. So, too, when a Rav VARIATIONS ON A THEME: hamachshir comes to check out a PROBLEMS AND PITFALLS place, there should be an atmosphere sources may subscribe to different offear and apprehension. And should ow that the meaning of the standards and use different his visitation be a joke, the joke is on terms is clear, let us explore hashgachos, and not all of these are the consumer. N some of the pitfalls. necessarily acceptable to you. A mashgiachgenerally is supposed • Many caterers and food suppli­ • People who restrict themselves to to be a reporter to the Rav hamach­ ers do not cook at the place of distri­ pas Yisroe!-bread baked by obser­ shir or the certifying agency, telling bution; some cook at a central loca­ vant Jews--will not buy baked goods him (or them) what he sees. Then, tion, others buy some ready-made from a bakery that is not shomer based on this information, the Rav or dishes. or rely on other agencies for Shabbos, yet they unwittingly eat at the certifying agency will decide basic ingredients. Each of these weddings where the pastries come

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6 The Jewish Obseroer, April 1993 ers as to where they will get the uten­ dards when eating at home than The caterer may advertise sils from, or even some of the food­ when they are away on a business perhaps not the main dish, but some trtp, or in other shaas hadchak situ­ that the food is "just like accessories. Some organizations will ations. Do they have structured not go into a hotel or hall where a non­ guidelines, or determine the permis­ Mom used to make," but if Kosher affair will be in progress at the sibility of the food by the seventy of same time. Some will have a team of their hunger pangs and the desirabil­ you think that the six or eight mashgichim. But if one ity of the morsels? comes to a hotel wedding without in­ • If you are aware that the caterer operation in the back quiring how the supervision is being at your fuend's simcha, where you are run, and relies solely on the caterer's a guest, does not have outside room is even remotely judgment and integrity, when the ca­ hashgacha, tell your host in advance terer may be under tremendous pres­ that you cannot eat there without ad­ similar to your mother's sures that can affect his objectivity. he equate supervision. Most likely he may be compromising. was unaware of the shortcoming and kitchen back home, you • Should you ask a local Rav what will appreciate your "alert." At the af­ his standards for Kashrus are. he fair, you have every light to ask the are fooling yourself. may tell you that he will pasken dif­ caterer (in the hotel office or in the ferently for his congregation than he kitchen) as to who is providing would for a large crowd. Which of the hashagacha for the food and for its from just such a bakery. Similarly, two conform to your standards? preparation; does he cook the foods many people who normally do not • Fish may seem like an uncompli­ rely on certain kulos (lenient ap­ cated food to order. but one must re­ proaches in halacha) will eat com­ alize that fish is problematic when If we all do our share, mercially prepared foods that are per­ delivered by a non-Jew in an un­ mitted only because of such kulos. * sealed box. Many suppliers prepare we could definitely make •When one gives a hechsherwhere both Kosher and non-Kosher fish. there is only one type of item, there and one simply cannot determine the a difference in the might be problems, but they will be exact type of fish one is eating when limited in nature and scope. But if the served fillets without skins-a situa­ standards of Kashrus establishment is producing Kosher tion that would render them forbid­ and non-Kosher products, where a den to eat. and, as a result, in the turn of a knob will release non-Ko­ •When eating out. one must know sher ingredients to replace Kosher in­ who the caterer is, who the owner is, kedusha of Kial Yisroel. gredients, one is dealing with a situ­ who the chef is. Then one should de­ ation that is by nature problematic. termine the degree to which the Similar situations prevail at din­ owner leaves the chefby himself. Un­ himself or purchase prepared foods? ners and weddings catered in hotels, derstandably, people tend to be more - from whom? You can ask him de­ or anywhere that non-Kosher food is cautious regarding meat establish­ tailed questions, such as how (or if) he being prepared at the same time as the ments than with pizza shops and examines leafy vegetables for insects, food for the Kosher dinner. Even the dairy restaurants. Certain halachos, 1f the fruits are from Eretz Yisroel, 1f ovens are in close proximity. This however, apply equally to both. For the cookies are pas YisroeL lt is in his should require more than one pair of instance, ifthe food preparation is left own interest that he answer you fully eyes. It may need eight pairs of eyes. to non-Jews, there may be problems and respectfully .... If your doubts are The caterer may advertise that the of bishul akum (food cooked by a non­ not dispelled, consult your Rao-rov. for not to rely on bitul is akin to apikorsus. Yet there are times sume responsibility for other items in eyes are on him as giVing a hechsher that this ruling is relied upon when there is another the stores in which lt is sold. Simi­ on the catertng establishment from way around the problem. larly, a hashgacha on the pizza in an now to eternity. 'Ibe reader is also referred to Teshuvos Chaswn eatery may not cover other items in If we all do our share, we could Soji?r. Yoreh De'ah, 65, regarding the possible responsiblility of a host to inform a b'Uest that the that store. People should be aware of definitely make a difference in the food he is serving him is only permitted because of this possibility. standards of Kashrus and, as a re­ hefsed meruba. •Many people have different stan- sult, in the kedusha of Kial Yisroel. •

TheJewtsh Observer. April 1993 7 1!101 11 'l~~tm The Sword And The Sefer

THE LIFE AND LEGACY OF RABBI MORDECHAI WEINBERG, 7"~, AS RECALLED BY A TALMID, RABBI YAAKOV FEITMAN

SPEAKING OF OTHERS-­ burned in front of us. Dedication to arena of protecting kavod Shamayim DEFINING IDMSELF learning, middos, hashkafa. mesiras and preserving the integrity of Torah nefesh for Klal YisroeL entered our from its would-be distorters and t must have been Friday, Novem­ souls with all the intensity and el­ perverters. ber 1, 1963 /14 Cheshvan 5724. emental authority of a hurricane. On the other hand, continued our I That Shabbos was the 10th That Friday, as he did so frequently, Rebbe in the name of Reb Elga Meir, Yohrzeit of the Chazon !sh, .,.. ~, and he shared with us the words of his own David Hamelech was the gentlest of the Rebbewas about to give his Fri­ Rebbe, Reb Elya Meir Bloch, '>":Gadol is a fighter. His passing means the same time be afather io every indi­ is Rav of the Young Israel of Beachwood, in Cleve­ that weapons in the war of Torah vidual who needed him land. A frequent contributor to these pages, his uDaas Torah:. Tapping the Source of Eternal Wis­ against mendacity have been laid to We listened that Friday, as always, dom" was featured in JO, May °92. rest. The Gadol is the champion in the enraptured, transported, challenged

8 The Jewish Observer. April 1993 to become what he wanted us to be. Torah giants ofthe last generation-Reb to see cars. buses and the usual commo­ But little did we know that he also Elchanan Wassennan, Reb Baruch Ber tion of city life on the Day of Rest. "But spoke of himself that Erev Shnbbos, Leibowitz, the Te/sher Roshei Yeshiva, you knew what it's like out there," his thirty years ago. and, ofcourse, his reveredsandak, Reb questioner persisted. Shlmon Shkop, '>"lit. He didn't quote "Yes," came the future Rosh A LIFE CONNECTED TO them He breathed them And we didn't Hayeshiva's reply, "but I hod forgotten ETERNITY just hear them He made us feel their what it's like since I haven't left the Ye­ presence. After but a year with the Rosh shiva grounds for four months." agaon Rav Mordechai Hayeshiva, these names and theirTurah Not only for months, but for Weinberg-Reb Motte!, as he approaches became a part of our vo­ years-full of days and nights spent H was universally and cabulary and our discourse. exclusively in the bets hamidrash­ belovedly known in the Torah Those who were privileged to spend Reb Motte! toiled to make his mind world-was born in 5629 (1929) on even longer with him learned to converse and soul conform solely to the wis­ the Lower East Side of Manhattan. with these giants of Baranovitz and dom and demands of the Torah. The sandak at his bris was the famed Karnenitz, Te/she and Grodno, Brisk The combination of almost super­ Gaon, Rabbi Shimon Shkop. '>"lll, and Votozhin ... and to be elevated by human diligence, natural brilliance in who was visiting the United States to them aswelL learning, a phenomenal memory and raise funds glowing personality soon endeared for his Reb Motte! to all and made him one yeshiva in He would of the closest disciples of the Rosh Lithuania. Hayeshiva of Telshe, Rabbi Eliyahu Less than virtually Meir Bloch, '>"ll'r. From Reb Elya Meir fifteen years he gained his approach to Torah later, the bring alive learning, the Telshe derech in youthful hashkafa through the profound Torah genius the Torah shiurei daas discourses, and a vision would be of how to spend his life teaching To­ hungrily giants of rah to his own talmidim swallowing Indeed, Reb Mattel's entire life, page upon the last gen­ tragically cut off at the height of his page of Rabbi accomplishments and spiritual pow­ eration­ ers, was an unbroken chain of Torah study and its transmission. In 1953, Reb Elchanan Wasserman, Reb Boruch Ber Leibowitz, when Reb Motte! was only 24, Rabbi Yitzchok Hutner, '>"ll'r, invested in his the Telsher Roshei Yeshiva, and, of course, his great potential for spreading Torah revered Reb Shimon Shkop, 7"::lr. He didn't and influencing American students, sandak, and appointed him to the hanha1a of quote them. He breathed them. And we didn't just Mesivta Rabbi Chaim Berlin. In 1963 he was selected to be Rosh Mesivta of hear them. He made us feel their presence. the newly-formed Mesivta of Eastern Parkway, and within five years he opened a beis hamidrash with the Shkop's Shaarei Yosher, rapidly be­ A PAPER TRAIL TO LEADERSlilP clear goal of total and absolute com­ coming expert in the works of a mitment to Torah study. With his ap­ broad range of Acharonim the more s profound attachment to pointment in 1972 as Rosh Haye­ recent Torah authorities. When oth­ Gedolei Yisroel began for Reb shiva of Yeshiva Gedolah Merkaz ers sometimes made a point ofignor­ ffi ottel when his parents, with Hatorah in Montreal, he entered what ing Torah commentaries of the past great self-sacrifice, sent him to the was to be the final phase of his life. century, he studied them, mastered newly-founded Telshe Yeshiva in Here he emerged in his full influence them, and cherished them all. For Cleveland. There, he rapidly became and greatness, inspiring hundreds of the Rosh Hayeshiva, it was a point known as a masmid of remarkable taimidim establishing shiwimamong of emunas chachamim The genera­ proportions, learning with incredible baalei battim, finding the time to be tions are getting smaller in stature, energy and vitality through days and the father of the Montreal Pirchei he would teach, and all the Torah of nights, uninterrupted. Agudath Israel. turning complete previous generations is precious Once he took a walk on Shabbos and families toward higher levels ofTorah and sacred. returned to the yeshiva, visibly shaken. living, and raising the standards of I vividly remember the electrifying When asked what hod happened to dis­ the entire city by his very presence moments in his Shev Shma'atsa class, turb his usually sunny disposition, he and constant vigilance. when he would virtually bring alive the responded that he hod been distressed In Montreal, that ostensible para-

7he Jewish Observer. April 1993 9 dox of traits that the Chazon !sh, ':nil, Montreal, there existed no [institution tion was relevant except trying to de­ exemplified, began to blossom in all promoting th.el concept of a Ben Torah termine what the Creator wants from its glory. There the RoshHayeshiva's dedicating his life to 'Ibrah. AU Bnei To­ us in each situation. For the RoshHa· middos of truth and compassion, rah [who learned in Montreal! eventually yeshiva, emes was a trait that meant kana'us and caring, coalesced went to college. Reb Mattel. in his first not only truth, but the imperative to seamlessly and naturally, developing Kol Nidrei drasha, spoke aggressively proclaim it with courage and elo­ harmoniously into the phenomenon and fearlessly about the need for Bnei quence, fearlessly "telling it like it is." known affectionately in the Torah Torah to be immersed totally in Torah At the same time, his constant, over­ world simply as "Reh Mattel." study. The remarks were directed at whelming fatherly love and caring several par· reached each of his talmidim. ents in the RebMottel minyan who A HEART AS GREAT had been AS KlAL YISROEL Weinberg planning to send their he letters that poured into imitated the children to Montreal after his petira college. Reb T (passing) from former students trait of G-d Mattel's and their families constitute an eter­ hearife1t and nal legacy oflove, reverence and affec­ known as truthful tion from those whose lives he touched Tzur. He words pen­ and elevated. One mother wrote:"! am etrated, and so-and-so's mother. He was always was as their children known as a trouble maker and non­ accomplisher, but the Rosh immovable as the most powerful of physical forces Hayeshiva singled him out, infused him with self-worth, and peeled away and as unshakable as the mountain upon which our his rough exterior. No one else saw what there was beneath the surface. nation's mesiras nefesh began. But Reh Mattel did and he saved my son." The change in the descliptive words tells a story in semantics that TRUTH: THE LEITMOTIF remained in yeshivos." (from the the RoshHayeshiva exemplified in life. OFALIFE Monthiy Bulletin of the Te/she Yeshiva He took people who had epithets and A1umniAssociatiOn, Summer, 1992) labels attached to their names and led all the wonderful traits the This devotion to emes was one as­ them by the hand into the beis ash Hayeshiva had learned pect of the Rosh Hayeshiva's phe­ hamidrash. There, using nothing but ram Reh Elya Meir, none was nomenal success with his talmidim. the power of his love for Torah and its asa important, or as deeply embedded, Surely the secret of his ability to ac­ people, he reassembled their sptritual as the absolute, uncompromising tuate and transform entire families molecules and they emerged with To­ and courageous commitment to into mishpechos Torah was not that rah in their veins. truth, no matter what the conse­ he was undemanding and easy to sat- A young man came to Montreal af. quences. Rabbi Avrohom Chaim isfy. When it came to setting stan­ ter a long series of failures in other Levin, N"P>""1, Rosh Hayeshiva of dards for right and wrong, to deter­ yeshivas and was about to give up on Telshe-Chicago, drew the parallel in mining the Torah attitude toward a ever becoming a talmidchacham Reh a moving eulogy for his close friend: particular issue, to changing a status Mattel devoted a portion of his dally 'The Rosh Hayeshiva Reb E1iyahu quo with which he was unsatisfied, study time to the bachur for two Meir, i,~:n, and a prominent rabbi were Reb Mattel Weinberg imitated the years, until he was well on the road once collecting.funds for Tels he Yeshiva. trait of G-d known as Tzur. He was as to becoming a Torah scholar on his The Rabbi suggested that the Rosh immovable as the most powerful of own. Today he credits his and his en­ Hayeshiva modify his anti-Zionist physical forces and as unshakable as tire family's love of Torah and Torah stance, in order to increase his revenue the mountain upon which our life to the unswerving faith placed for the Yeshiva. He answered, 'Not nee· nation's mesiras nefesh began. upon him by the Rosh Hayeshiva. essarily must! be a Rosh Yeshiva: how· The Rosh Yeshivas adherence to This was another mantfestation of the ever, I am obligated to be a yarei emes sent a signal that here was one Rosh Hayeshiva's gevura: He never Shamayim and a truthfal person. If. be· person whose motives were totally gave up on a Jewish soul. And they cause of the truth. I cease to be a Rosh pure. The Rosh Hayeshiva could be knew it, and responded. Yeshiva, so may it be.' counted upon to present a view based In Montreal, as in Camp Horim, "Reb Mattel learned the lesson of purely upon his objective view of which he founded for summer Torah truth well It was tol.d to me that when what the Torah demands. Everyone study and where he spent part of his Reb Motte[ came twenty years ago to knew that for Reh Mattel, no motiva- summers, everyone looked forward to

10 The Jewish Observer. April 1993 seeing the Rosh Yeshiva first thing in talmid to live a joyful Torah life. at health and honor were insignificant the morning. One typical comment least in part to justify the Rosh when someone was in distress. The carries the sentiment of scores of oth­ Hayeshiva's confidence and love. Rosh Yeshiva insisted that I drive away ers: "His 'good morning' could cany Reb Mattel's compassionfor those in so that the recalcitrant husband not be you through the day. especially as it need was legendary. Once, when driv­ frightened off. ... was always accompanied by his radi­ ing on the outskirts of Baro Park, I was I remembered, then, a moment in the ant smile." Just watching the Rosh shocked to see him standing alone in a beis hamidrash, many years before. Hayeshiva walk to the beis hamid­ howling wind, his beard blowing madly The Rosh Hayeshiva had come into the rash, the joy and anticipation of in the storm. I pulled over. 'Rebbe, what room brandishing an article as if it were teaching Torah illuminating his face, are you doing out here?" I shouted above sullied with something he would prefer was itself the greatest inspiration to the din. "Can I please take you some­ not to be touching. We feU silent as he try to do the same one day. where?" waved the offending piece of paper in Once someone had learned Torah "I am trying to convince someone to the air. IrontcaUy, his first words were, from Reb Motte!. a lifetime bond was agree io give his wife a get." Reb Mattel "I cannot be silent when the word of forged, never to be broken. The Rosh answered, "and he insisted I meet him Hashem is being disgraced and the To­ Hayeshiva rejoiced with every stu­ out here." The Rosh Yeshiva would pro­ rah is being falsified." dent who made a stmcha, refusing to test loudly andforcefelly ifhe perceived We listened and watched the accept payment for his time and ef­ a breach o}Ravod HaTorah. but his own Rebbe 's face grow altemattngly as red fort. "This is as his beard and as white as his teeth. my nachos ------...Ii For the while he warned us of dangers that as well," he lurked outside the walls of the Study would de- ·.~ individual HalL "Here is someone, " he proclaimed clare, and in ominous tones, "wfw teaches Torah the obvious I hewould and claims that the Chafetz Chaim and pride he Reb Yisroel Salanter are ins4/Jlcient as took in the I sacrifice guides for improving ourmiddos. He as­ talmid's serts that you need Kant and family be- I anything. Shakespeare-philosophers and po­ cruneanon­ ets-to be a good Jew! Rachmona going inspi­ To preserve litzlanl" I daresay that any of us who ration to the heard those words, spoken with mea­ the purity sured vehemence and emotion. with pain and concern for Kial Yisroel. waz and sanctity of the Torah, he would brook no forever more be sensitive to statements and writings that undercut the Torah infraction, tolerate no corruption. For the individual As I reluctantly drove away ftum the Rosh Yeshiva that blustery day, I re­ there was always hope; eternal values had to .fleeted on the greatness ofthe man who could balance two such middos, which protected at all costs. do not always coexist in such harmony. For the individual he would sacrifice any-

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The Jewish Observer. April 1993 11 thing. To preseroe the purity and sanctiiy at a late hour, so it was not until 8:40 cern over the schedules ofseveral ofthe of the Torah. he would brook no in.frac­ A.M. that he knocked on the door of campers and reiterated his insistence tion. tolerate no corruption. For the indi­ one of the Hatzoloh volunteers. When that some boys go home briefly to vidual there was always lwpe; eternal he was seen by the doctor soon after­ spend a few hours with their parents values had to be protected at all costs. ward. it was determined that he had for kibud av v'eiJTL Before leaving the suffered a massive heart attack and emergency room, he made sure to ask THE PASSING OF A GADOL was rushed to the hospital. Through­ the names of the male nurse who was out the next few hours, the Rosh taking care ofhim and that ofone ofthe t was the fifteenth of Tamuz, his Hayeshiva would give his final shiur, Hatzoloh volunteers whom he did not mother's Yahrzeit, in his beloved a lesson in both life and death, in what know personally. Later, the entire staff I Camp Hortm (soon to be renamed it means to be a true Torah leader. would inquire anxiously about the ex­ Zichron Mordechai), that the Rosh In the aftermath of the heart attack, traordinary rabbi whom they had met Hayeshiva suffered his final heart at­ when others talked of different things, for only fleeting moments, but who tack. Although he had been in pain all the Rosh Hayeshiva reviewed with made an indelible impression on them. night, the RoshHayeshiva character­ great joy a Torah chiddush he had re­ When the Rosh Hayeshiva heard that istically did not want to bother anyone cently recited at a bris, expressed con- he would have to stay for Shabbos, he immediately Issued instructions con­ i , ,'' cerning any Jewish staff members and the laws of chiUul Shabbos and dis­ I WOULD YOUR mGH SCHOOL-AGE soN I cussed with the Hatzoloh members as­ pects of the hashkqfa of seeking medi­ I BENEFIT FROM ...... cal treatment. e Torah tells us that Pinchas' I ...• EXPERIENCED. WARM RABBAIM DEDICATED TO THE PERSONAL eward for his kana'us-his DEVELOPMENT AND LEARNING SUCCESS OF EACH OF THEIR TALMIDIM.? zealotry for Hashem-was the .... AN UNCOMPROMISING, TOP-NOTCH GENERAL STUDIES PROGRAM? covenant of peace. Rewards in the Torah are not antithetical to the acts .... SHH.JRIM JN !YUN, B'KIUS, CHUMASH, HALACHA AND NAVI? of heroism that earned them. True ...• THE PRESENCE (IN THE SAME DORM AND BAIS MED RASH) OF A kana'us leads to peace if its purpose RENOWNED YESHIVA GEDOLAH? in life is peace. Hagaon Rav Mord­ .... A SJl.l'E, WELL-MONITORED DORMITORY IN A BEAUTIFVL echai Weinberg's purpose in life was SUBURBAN-NEIGHBORHOOD? to preserve the Torah so that it could be learned in peace. He helped many IFSO... a family achieve internal peace, and taught many a talmid how to fight so that peace could reign. Tzaddikimgo YOU SHOULD BE TALKING TO US from strength to strength because that is their peace. Chazal (Sifri, Eikev 11,12) tell us, 'The sword and the sefer came down from Heaven intertwined.· Only the person with burning love for the sefer can successfully wield the sword, in its protection. And only he who has the courage to both love and chastise ulti­ ~J1::l'J11.::l mately carries both in tranquility, hav­ o:i 'i\'.:lii!l''i ing earned the gratitude and affection m.es1v_-zA ofthose he has shielded with his sword. b'pizov1oewce fter the Rosh Hayeshiva's passing, an envelope arrived FOR MOREINFORMATION A at the Telshe Yeshiva in Cleve­ land. In it was the Rosh Hayeshiva's PLEASE CALL regular contribution to the Sefortm fund. In his quiet but regular way, RABBI_ AVI SHAFRAN, MENABEL Reb Motte! was one of the major bene­ A DIVISION OF THE NEW ENGLAND ACADEMY OF TORAH factors of the yeshiva library, and 450 ELMGROVE AVE. even after his petira his contribution PROVIDENCE, .RHODE ISLAND 02906 continued on. The same can be said (401) 33tc5327 of his Torah legacy, which will surely endure forever. • ~------J 12 The Jewish Observer, April 1993 Miriam Adah.an WHEN CHILDREN ARE POISONED WITH CRmCISM ... A Plea for Humane Treatment ofthe Souls inOurTrust

A PRAYER OFT THOUGHT, "Any love that is dependent RARELY UTTERED upon a spetjfic consideration, when that consideration van­ anyaparentwouldprob­ ishes, the love ceases; but if it ably like to offer the fol­ is not dependent upon a spe­ Mlowing informal te.fiJ.Ia; cific consideration, it will never "Dear Almighty. I think there cease"IPirkeiAvos 5:19). was a mix-up on the order I plnced The child who is unable to ful- «;. concerning my child. I specljled: fill his parents' demands feels un­ brilliant and obedtent. 'That's not loved. He is filled with fear and what I got. Since I realize that shame. He may have suicidal and there is no exchange policy Up homicidal fantasies. His pain will be There, I have been doing my ut­ manifest in various signs. For ex­ most to take what You gave me ample, between the ages of three andfitmydreams. Unfortunately, and eight, he may show: no matter how hard I try, I'm still • Sleep disorders: He may refuse not getting my way, and that's to go to sleep or have nightmares making me more .frustrated and about being chased or killed. angry all the time. Please take my • Eating disorders: He may refuse pleas to heart." food, restrtct food to a veiyfew types Adults don't utter such teflllos. or vomit after eating. But they do call therapists, like my­ the face and • Delay or regression in motor ac­ self. saying, "I can't stand this child. shouted, 'Dummy! tivity: He may cling to "babyish" be­ How do 1 change him/her?" A typical You can't do any­ havior, not wanting to feed or dress conversation goes something like thing right!' My son himself. this: stoodthere,frozen.ItwasawjUL Weall • Depression: He may be with­ "Our teenage son is not doing well rn ate in silence. A few days later, my son drawn and apathetic, too "mature" his studtes and my husband crushes was helping me clean for Shabbos. and serious for his age, act robot-like him every chance he gets. if I try to de· When my husband walked in, he said, and inhibited, lacking the natural fend the boy, he attacks him even more 'Idiot! That's all you're goodfor-jani· exuberance and curiosity of normal viciously, or he slams me for being the toria! work.' I see this boy's spirit dying children. cause of it all, telling me that I've been before my eyes. But I don't want to de· • Delay or regression in language: too soft on him. I'U give you an example. stroy my marriage. What can I do?" He may use babyish words. or refuse When we stood up to say Kiddush, my to speak at all. son spUled a little wine. My husband A PLANT WITHOUT SUNSlilNE, • Delay or regression in toilet train­ jt.ew into a rage and slapped him across ALIFE WITHOUT WVE ing: He may revert to wetting or soil­ ing himself. withholding stool. reliev­ Mrs, Adahan ls a published author whose works ceptance Is the essence of love. ing him/herself in inappropriate include Appreciating People (Including You.self!) Love is to people what sunshine places. etc. and, most recently, It's AU a Gift, both published by Feldheim. Her article, 'The Pain of the Single or and water are to a plant. With­ • Somatization offeelings: He may Childless Woman,~ appeared in JO, Jan. '93. out it, people's lives are stunted. have frequent headaches and diges-

The Jewish Observer. April 1993 13 tive problems and complain of feeling vous movements, such as hair twirl­ tired all the time. ing, stuttertng or fidgeting. He may A person's ability to • Anger: He may overreact to minor show excessive fear of bugs, animals, frustrations by yelling, biting. hitting, ghosts, demons, etc. experience love for and throwing objects. Older children may exhibit the fol­ • Lack of emotional independence: lowing symptoms: from Hashem is, to a He may cry hystertcally or cling when • Denial offeelings: He may deny a parent leaves, be anxious about that he is touched by upsetting events large degree, leaving home, refuse to play with age­ (e.g. "l don't care if I flunk," or "It mates, or have trouble shartng with doesn't hurt me when you hit me," or determined by the way others. "Go ahead, punish me. I don't care."). •Diffuse anxiety: He may be fear­ • Aggressinn: He may become ex­ he was treated by his ful about his health, death and pos­ tremely crttical, argumentative and sible catastrophes. He may have ner- uncooperative, or even physically via- parents ....

Gemma, Machshavah, Biography and Reflection - lent with the weaker parent or other some timely selections from Arl:Scroll: children in order to cover feelings of helplessness, shame, vulnerability or Now available -in plenty of time for Daf Yoml (starling May 18)• - sadness. ThE schoTTENSTEIN Ebmo,;:: TRACTATE NAZIR - • Depressinn: He may find no plea­ sure in anything, may over-sleep, rAJ[Ml.Jf bJ Jl3A\1[~ Complete in 2 Volumes stay in his room for long pertods of time and be unresponsive to any Never before has the Gemara been present­ overtures from others to engage in ed in English so clearly, so accurately, so faith­ fully, so beautifully. pleasurable activities, Try it. You'll find clarity you never expected • Perfectionism: He may feel like a outside the lecture room of a great teacher. crtminal ifhe makes a minor mistake. See why it is acclaimed from Moscow to He may feel he must be perfect to de­ Melbourne, London to Los Angeles. serve love and respect. He is devas­ tated by any hint of criticism. He takes great delight In pointing out other's imperfections and reminding A brilliant anthology adapted from the profound and scintil­ them of their mistakes. lating discourses of the Sfas Emes on the Shalash Regalim: • Addictive behavinr: He may use Pesach, Shavuos and Succos. Divided into dozens of topics, alcohol or drugs, overeat, spend com­ this is one of the most satisfying and stimulating books in pulsively, etc. many years. A full index enables access to hundreds of divrei • Delinquent behavior: He may torah for your Yorn Tov table. By Rabbi Yosef Stern. steal, destroy property, be cruel to animals, set frres, etc. • Poor schnol perfomiance: He may The Life and Times of Reb Yaakov l\amenetsky ';·~ underachleve and be unable to con­ Reb Yaakov Kamenetsky 7"::lT spanned many worlds: the centrate in class. world of the Alter of Slabodka, the pre-War shtetl mv. Seattle, Toronto, Torah Vodaath and Agudath Israel. • Self-injuring behavior, (This is Reb Yaakov was one of the prime architects of the new more likely with girls who may cut Torah-world he helped build on the ashes of the Holocaust. themselves with razor blades or other Reb Yaakov was a wise man of his generation. This 400-page sharp instruments, pull out their book is the biography of the year. By Yonason Rosenblum; hair, become anorexic or bulimic, based on the research of Rabbi Nason Kamenetsky. etc.) • .....,,.&ILL •Accident proneness: He may have Reflections on the World frequent emergencies requiring medi­ of Today's Jewish Woman cal attention which demand parental Jewish women's aspirations, roles, and responses involvement. to the new feminism and old challenges in modern • Promiscuous behavinr. guise. An anthology of ideas and ideals from the • RW11ltng away.from home. Jewish Observer. Stimulating hashkafah guideposts. • Isolation.from peers: He may com­ Provocative approaches. Skillfully edited, with a plain that he has no friends, that no moving introduction, by Sarah Shapiro. one likes him, that he is unpopular. Having been taught to expect rejec­ Available now at Hebrew booksellers or call: 1·800-MESORAH In NYS: {718) 921-9000 /FAX: {718) 680-1875 tion, he is defensive and bitter.

14 The Jewish Observer. April 1993 they were treated, or to pick spouses ROMANTIC HOPES VS. ... Thus, those brought who berate them as good-for-noth­ REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS ings, thus perpetuating the cycle of up with endless degradation. o parent sets out deliberately Furthermore, a person's ability to to destroy his child's spirtt. criticism are certain expertence love for and from Hashem N Parents believe that they siin­ is, to a large degree, determined by ply "want the best" for their children, that Hashem could the way he was treated by his par­ want to ensure that they will survive ents. Thus, those brought up with and be successful 1n a cruel and com­ never love them, and endless crtticism expertence G-d as a petitive world. To have an "average" rejecting, punishing or indifferent be­ child, is, in their mtnds, to have failed­ despair of ever feeling ing. They are certain that Hashem to be doomed to a life of mediocrtty. ex­ could never love them, and despair of ploitation and humiliation. No wonder His closeness. ever feeling His closeness. we often hear children say, "l feel like

• Compulsive approval·seeking and attention-seeking: He may be the AA OPEN.LETm! TO 8AIS YAAKOVH.S. .,. .. 'O':l clown, desperately seeking reassur· GRADUATES ance that he is important. • Selfdentgration: He may con­ stantly say, 'Tm so stupid, clumsy, crazy ... ," etc. When such symptoms appear in children, parents often believe that the child is betng manipulative, rebel­ lious or just plain "bad." Yet there is usually a history of chronic rejection at home and at school. He may have been a colicky baby or a "difficult child." Parents may have often slapped, punished or yelied at him 1n an attempt to get him to calm down and cooperate. Teachers may have complalned that the boy had "con­ centration problems." He may have been often humiliated and rtdiculed by teachers and students for being "slow" or disruptive. Chronic crtticism is a death wish for the other person, which is why it hurts so much. The sub-message is, "You are not fit to live. You don't de­ serve love or respect because you don't meet my standards." In time, the crtticized child forms destructive beliefs, such as, "People will always hurt me. I must protect myself by withdrawing, or hurting them before they hurt me." "I am essentially defec­ tive and unlovable. I must never let anyone see who I really am." It is not difficult to imagine how these beliefs affect his relationships, including his relationship with Hashem. People tend to recreate the emotional atmosphere of their child­ hoods. Thus, rejected children tend to treat their mates and children in the same abusive manner in which

'The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 15 garbage because I'm not one of the top son makes tn a Critical atmosphere Many have organizational problems. one percent tn the class." They learn are made despite the criticism, not To give the reader an idea of what one this attitude from grown-ups. because of it. The result is that the particular handicap is like, read the Many parents believe that love tn­ child is immobilized with fear and followtng sentence: duces arrogance or apathy in chil­ shame or becomes aggressively hos­ \ c do 1 ""•j,e- do'(, c.o.,-1'\ dren. To avoid this, they criticize, nag, tile tn an attempt to protect his frag­ ~ This is how a dyslexic child sees scream, hit, nudge, hover over, be­ ile sense of self. words, with many of the letter back­ rate, punish. bribe, threaten, cajole, wards, especially p's, b's, d's and q's. chase after, tnduce guilt tn, lecture THE LEARNING-DISABLED CHILD The average teacher has had no tratn­ to... their children. tng tn how to recognize or cope with Does this make children love Torah hose who suffer the most are an LD child. In frustration, he might and act tn lovtng ways toward others? children with learning disabili­ say, "Come on! You're holdtng up the Quite the opposite. The children grow T ties. It has been estimated that whole class. It's a simple sentence. up thinking, "Adults have the right to up to 25% of all children have some Everyone else can read it. You're just humiliate, torment, torture and dehu­ kind of"learning disabili1y." Between lazy. Tiy harder. You'll miss the break manize me to make me fulfill their four and ten percent of all children if you don't get it right tn the next ten needs. When I get to be an adult, I'm suffer from hyperactivity (80% of seconds. I'm gotng to send a note to gotng to have the same right." these are boys). Approximately 12% your parents. You'll be punished." So Coercive methods never work. also have A.D.D.-Attention Deficit the child sits there, feeling like a Chronic criticism always intensifies Deficiency-which means that they dummy, trytng out different combi­ the veiy behaviors that are betng criti­ have trouble focustng on the meantng nations. If he's lucky, he will finally cized. Whatever achievements a per- of what they are heartng or readtng. come up with, "The boy made pop com." Or take the case of the hyperactive Considering a move child who is told to "Sit still and keep toMOJVSEY? your finger on the word," while he feels like he has grasshoppers jump­ tng around tn his bratn and tractors for rareful attention to your racing through his body. individual needs, call us today! Imagtne how painfully humiliating life is to such children. Yet most of (914) 354-8445 these children are quite bright and would do well with proper guidance and creative outlets. Unfortunately, constant rejection from parents, sib­ ARE YOU MOVING? ltngs, peers and teachers often shat- ters them psychologically so that they IS YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS PRINTED grow tnto adults who are too passive INCORRECTLY ON THE JO MAILING LABEL? and depressed or aggressively hostile We need your help to ensure proper delivery of the 10 to your home. Please to achieve much. attach current mailing label in the space below, or print clearly your address Instead of alerting the parents tnto taking action. some teachers encour­ and computer processing numbers that are printed above your name on the age a false sense of hope by saytng, address label. "Don't woriy. You've heard of Rav X. ADDRESS CHANGE FORM He was a great scholar who had diffi­ (Affix label here) cul1y learning tn his early years. So, be patient. You'll be a big talmid chachmn!" Typically, when a father is told that his child has a learning disabili1y, he will reply, "Nonsense! He's just lazy Name ______and stubborn." He cannot accept that his child is handicapped. He takes it

Add~ss ______as if it were his own personal failure. This is especially true when the par­ City, State, Zip------­ ent has some disabili1y himself, stnce hyperactivi1y and learning disabilities Date Effective------are often hereditary conditions. Please allow 6-8 weeks ior a!! changes to be reflected on your mailing label. WE WILL NOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR BACK ISSUES MISSED unless you notify us 8 weeks prior to your move. Children should be encouraged to develop their potential to the fullest.

16 The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 High expectations in a child can help 3. "I am committed to saying is miserable because he cannot keep build his sense of self-worth and self­ only what will help my children feel up with the rest of his class. Who is confidence. closer to their TZeUem Elokim and to the father thinking of when he sub­ enable them to feel Hashem's pres­ jects his son to this daily torture? OVERCOMING ence. !fl scream at the child for spac­ Chronic criticism (including well­ CONDEMNAHOLISM ing out, for being disorganized or meaning but unasked-for advice) in­ clumsy, or for not catching on stills a deep sense of inadequacy and very parent has an obligation quickly, will he feel better about him­ despair, often for one's entire life. If to instill good middos in his self? Will he love Torah more?" the mother whose example I quoted E children: consideration for 4. "'Ibis child offers me the op- at the beginning of this article saw her others. patience. modesty. zeal, portunity to develop spiritually by husband stabbing her child in the cleanliness, order, cheerfuiness, em­ practicing self-control and uncondi­ heart with a knife, she would not pathy, diligence, perseverance, etc. tional love." stand by helplessly, wringing her To do so, it Is necessary to point out We are obligated to "Love our neigh­ hands in despair. She would act! to a child where he can improve. Re­ bors as ourselves" (Vayikra 19, 18). Criticism is a stab to the psyche. buke is a sign of love and respect for Implicit in this command is that to love Unfortunately, because words are others. However, Chazal tell us that others, one must first have a sense of less tangible than physical blows, rebuke must be done in a manner self-worth. Self-worth means being people often think they are less harm­ that does not destroy the other able to say, "I accept myself as I am ful. Yet words destroy more lives than person's spirit (i.e. it must be deliv­ right now, with all my faults and bullets. It is no wonder that we are ered in private, in a low voice. with told, "One who shames another has love in one's heart, for the other no portion in the World-To-Come" person's good, and with a practical, Acceptance is the (Babba Metzkl 59a). achievable solution in mind, and In Criticism is a life-destroying addic­ keeping with the child's personality essence of love. Love is to tion. The Maharal states that the and skills). source of all sin is the feeling of self­ Unfortunately, crtticism is a lot people what sunshine diminishment (Nesivos Olam, Vol 2, like cigarette smoking. Those who in­ "Nesiv Ahavas Re'd'). A person who dulge in it think it is natural and and water are to a plant. has lost his sense of Divine value will even good for them. Thus, unless the not believe that there is any transcen­ person realizes that he is endanger­ Without it, people's lives dent meaning to the events of his life. ing himself and those around him, He will have no trust in himself or in he will continue. are stunted. his ability to overcome the tempta­ The aware parent has to be very tions of his yeitzer hara, or to cope firm in fighting this addiction. He or with life's hardships. He will not feel she can announce, "Hostile criticism foibles." Unfortunately, "Self-respect" that he is capable of forming a loving is trei.f. I'm not allowing it in the home has a negative connotation in many bond with others or that he is deserv­ anymore." Of course, it isn't easy to people's minds. It smacks of smug ar­ ing of anyone's love, including stop an addiction. One must learn to rogance and apathetic complacency. Hashenis. substitute compassion for hatred in truth, acceptance of one's faults (not when children misbehave, by think­ denial of them) creates the atmo­ o we might picture Hashem's ing the following: sphere in which growth takes place response to our opening I. 'The child is innocent. He is automatically. S imaginary tefilla: doing the best he can with the tools We can really value others only to "I gave you a precious neshama to he has right now. Ifhe knew any other the extent that we value ourselves as nurture and love. This chUd has his own way to get relief from pain or atten­ we are. This is something every child needs, talenis and propensities. Your tion, he wouldn't be acting this way." craves from his parents for as long as control is ltmitecL Yourjob is to teach him 2. 'What is my motivation? Am he lives. proper middos. You can do this only if I criticizing because of my ego's desire Make sure your expectations are you, yourself, are a model of good for kavod so that I can boast about appropriate for the child. A brilliant, middos, particularly patience and com­ having a brilliant child to my frtends secure child can take the harshest passion. Let go of wanting this child to and relatives? Am I crushing the child rebuke, but an insecure child will be felfill your fantasies. I have a different because of my ego's desire for comfort devastated. Ifyou are blinded by your picture in mind. lfyouflghtMy Will, you and convenience and because I don't selfish ego-need for kavod or control, will only make yourself and everyone want to be bothered with the de­ you will not act in their best interests. around you miserable. Allow your mands of a child who is hurt or A mother complained that her hus­ child-and while you're at it, your handicapped?" (You can tell when band insisted on sending their five­ spouse and the other people in your your motivation is unkosher because year-old to the most demanding, life-to seroe Me with love. Accept them you feel impatient and hostile when high-pressured cheder in Yerusha­ as they are so that they can become all the child doesn't fulfill your needs.) layim. The child, who is hyperactive, that they can be." •

The Jewish Obseroer, April 1993 17 ~ ~\ \ 1 I .49\~C• . '•49\fl" 6~.~~~~~o~, · N '-'''I~ Yi.I'-' "~ t.1~.y ~ __ ,, ,,,,,,,,,,~1·,11r.:lJl·~~' ~L··.~·

then dallied some more. I com­ shared by others as well. plained and mumbled and then "How lnng did it take you to answer complained some more. But I did it. tlwse Navi questions. last week?" asked In retrospect, I don't believe that it one father. ''.Are you kidding?" the other father f I g~~~~e~n:r~~;'ir~:f~~i·o} snapped in disgust. "I let my wife do 7 those p'rokiml reviewed, p'sukim those questions. She went to seminary; I memorized and words I looked up. weneverleamedNavi inyeshiva." AM(iwAf "' And 1f not for all of those composi· "How lnng did it take you to complete tions I had to write, I might not have the Chumash homework. last night?" I don't consider myself middle­ been able to write this article! asked anotherfather. aged, yet. But if you'd ask my Today, however, the homework children, they'd probably tell situation is very different from when "I'm ashamed to admit it, but I I couldn 'tfinish that one. I put in about an you that I went to school during the I went to yeshiva. Oh, sure, my chil­ hour and a half and then Ijust gave up. Middle Ages. Of course, some things dren still come home with loads of So I wrote my daughter a note that she were different when I attended ye­ sefortm, books and stencils, just as I didn'tfeelwelL" shiva ketana. We were discouraged, did; and yes, they do launch into the for example, from watching the now same impassioned oratory on the in­ My wife asked another mother how ineffable black box, but not excom­ justices of homework, just as I did. she managed that difficult social stud­ municated for it. (While community But... they don't do the homework, as ies homework which was due after a standards have risen, the media's I did. Instead, my wtfe and I end up chassana. have plummeted!) Instead of check­ doing a lot of the homework! "It wasn't easy," the other mother ex­ ing candy wrappers for Hebrew writ­ My parents were certainly there for plained. triumphantly. "But we had a ing, we checked for "pure vegetable me when I needed help with my lnng drive to the hall So I took the social shortening." And the only "uni­ homework, but that usually con­ studies book with me in the car and dic­ forms" were "yarmulkas and tzitzis sisted oflittle more than giving me the tated the aitswers to my son over the for the boys, and skirts or dresses spelling of a word that I might have car-phone while my husband drove to for the girls." otherwise had to look up in the dic­ the wedding." But while some things have tionary or helping me cut a piece of changed, I have always assumed that cardboard in a straight line. Today, it nd so it goes. More often than others would not and should not is increasingly difficult for children to we would like to admit, change. One of those Rock-of­ complete many of their homework chavrusos are kept waiting, Gibraltar components ofyeshiva edu­ assignments unassisted; and in some suppers are served late, and shiurim cation is homework, or more prop­ cases, it is even necessary for the par­ are missed as parents hassle with erly, the "h" word. ents to complete the assignments un­ homework. In some extreme cases. Now don't get me wrong. 1 HATED assisted by their children! invitations to bar mitzvas or sheva homework. I dallied and dillied and I would not lift pen to paper on this berachos are declined because of sensitive subject had I not surveyed homework, as parents are held hos­ Eliyahu Mayer is a New York-based wrtter. His dozens of other yeshiva and Bais tage at home. Invariably, tension ~Candyman For A Day" appeared in the October '89 Yaakov students. My wtfe's and my mounts, patience runs out and at issue of The Jewish Observer. experiences are, unfortunately, least one person ends up crying. And

18 The Jewish Observer, April J 993 it is not always the child! In this mad race for the top, the ~ ~,~~,~ Hopefully, all would agree that chinuchitself can be lost, or at least this situation cannot continue. Our compromised. Our children are be­ children are simply not learning ing asked, in effect, to teach them­ from the homework we do for them, selves. If they cannot, then the par­ which denies them the education ents must teach them. And if the they need and deseive. And we can­ parents are ill, incapacitated or ~ AUTl+ORS & ~RTISTS ~ not keep up under the strain with­ undereducated, then the children out burning out. collapsing or hav­ end up either turning to each other, ing neivous breakdowns. Our rela­ like the blind leading the blind, or authors and artists to submit tionships with our children are suf­ worse, falling hopelessly behind. (It manuscripts and artwork for fering the most, as we become the has reached the point where some evaluation. We seek manu­ targets of each parents are scripts in all areas of judaica other's tempers. even asking publishing with originality, which have been I HATED homework. whether the creativity and high literary standard. Our editors develop shortened by ac­ teachers are and highlight the individuality cumulated frus- I dallied and dillied and teaching at all!) of the author and our graphics tration. then dallied some more. department gives each book ome might t its own identity, aparent. I suggest a ~ We welcome the opportu· 11 find myself I complained and S private nity to work with you. A singing mumbled consultation the all-too-familiar (~\~'!jf chorus, "Whose homework is it. and then anyway?!" How complained did this happen? When did it start? - ~ . Limdm ·JtrurainrL l some more. 180 Park Avenue• Lakewood NJ 08701 ~~I' Who is to blame? {201) 90S.-3000 •Fax (20)) 367 6666 To answer the But I did it. 1 "'· 1: ~.:•• 1 °:, ·:::::: last question first, I we have to blame ourselves, not our ~,;:~,;: ~ children. It is our fault for putting grades above learning and "success" The. Vitti Leibel above genuine achievement. If our daughter did not understand her HELPLINE teacher, if the Rebbe went over our with the teacher. I've tried that. It No Ptoblerii ls, io _Big.-, son's head, or If our children cannot doesn't work. The teacher has cunicu­ . No Ptoblem ls too smatt .. , get all the right answers, that does 0 Is there some terrible thing'_ happening iii yOor lum guidelines and deadlines from the family that' you are,atraid 'Of ashamed to le1t not mean that we are supposed to do principal. ti.nyooC? the work for them. They will gain Others would suggest speaking O_ Are you a -teenage , Or yoong --Adult ,having more from accepting the responsibil­ with the principal. I've tried that, too. problems that are --:too difficult for you , -to handle?? ity for their own limitations than they Each time I do raise the "h" question 0 Are 'Ytitr single or·ri18.tried, and experlcn'cing will by passing the buck to us. with a principal, I'm told my child is personal or inter·personal conflicts'?'? But parents do not bear all of the "unmotivated," "unrepresentative," D Are-you simply confronted with-Ii, situation that guilt for this homework nightmare; or-my favorite-" too sensitive." requires you to find an _objective-listener'? the yeshivas and Bais Yaakovs are at Frankly, 1 would have hired a tutor Sbme of the Torah_ ci>trtmunity's highly ski1led least partially at fault, as well. The 1hempists are available to talk to you on- the already had I not checked with par­ phone, with total -a:nonym:lty, ' drive towards "excellence" in chinuch ents of my children's classmates and has gone too far, as competition is no discovered that they were also told H•O•U•R•S Monday-Friday (Day) 8:00 AM-12:00 Noon longer just a problem amongst stu­ that their children are "unmotivated," Monday-Thursday (Eve.) 8:00 PM-11:00 PM dents but also amongst schools. "unrepresentative," or "too sensitive." Sunday 9:00 AM-12:00 Noon Some yeshivas are trying to outdo What we need here is a revolution! 9:00 PM-1 l:OO PM each other while some Bais Yaokovs We need a return to tradJtional fam­ DIAL (718) HELP-NOW(435·7669) are attempting to set ever-higher ily values! We need to make home­ In Chicago call l.fl00-HELP.fJ23 standards. Every few years the level work a job for children, not parents! ltiNe'lf JerseytCall t-90B-363•llUO for starting Mishnayos drops one And we need to end this hostage cri­ Thls' project has been approved · grade, as does the grade for beginning sis so that I can get to my shiur on by leading Torah authorities Ramban. time! •

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t is now more than nine months to do? each of since Rabbi Herny Michaelson re­ The SCA Jewry's I tired from his position as execu­ consists of three so­ tive vice-president of the Synagogue six con­ called de­ Council of America, and no one has stituent or­ nomina- as yet taken his place. Part of the rea­ ganizations­ tions. As son for this vacuum in leadership is lay I congrega­ such, it was a problem inherent to the SCA since tional and rabbini­ meant to be the its founding in 1926: What is it meant cal groups from united voice of reli­ gious Jewry on issues of conscience, where a singularly Jew­ ish perspective calls for specific statements, actions, and reactions. This inter-denominational union was ill-conceived, and as a result, was destined for organizational pa­ ralysis from the very start. It is sim­ ply unacceptable for Orthodox groups to affiliate with correspond­ ing Conservative and Reform bodies under a religious umbrella, sending out the message that Orthodoxy, Conservatism and Reform are merely variants of the same religion. The readers should be reminded that, in response to a query from an Orthodox rabbi in 1956, eleven lead­ ing Roshei Yeshiva and Rabbonim of the time• issued a statement declar­ ing such joint participation as halachically unacceptable. True, there may have been a time • Rates in U.S. dollars when most members of the Orthodox • Rates include unlimited mileage rabbinate inAmertca were not articu­ • Rates do not include insurance late in English, or simply felt that they had little clout without being part of • T.L.D. W· $6 per day- is mandatory if C.D.W is not purchased. some larger groups. While such mo­ tivation is not a justification for legiti­ • 7 Days advance booking requiered mizing groups that propagate defi­ • Prepayment by credit card. ance of halacha and deviation from • Cancellation or modification fees basic principles of faith, at least the may apply. desperation that prompted such af­ 'Based on 7 days Rental. filiation is understandable. U.S.A: 1-800-33H0840R 1-800-552-0141 ·Rabbi Moshe Feinstein [Tifereth Jerusalem): Rabbi Yitzchok Hutner {R' Chaim Berlin); Rabbi CANADA: 1·800·879-2847OR1-800-526-5343 Avraham Joffen {Beth Joseph); Rabbi Avraham Kalmanowttz (Mir); Rabbi Yaakov Kamenetsky ffo­ rah Vodaath); Rabbi Chaim Mordechai Katz (Telshe); Rabbi Ahron Kotler (B.M.G.J: Rabbi Yaakov Yitzchok Halevi Ruderman (Ner Israel); Rabbi Gedalia Schorr {Torah Vodaath): Rabbi AVIS Menachem Yosef Zacks (Yeshivas R' Yitzchak Elchanan) ~?t:nrt:n; and M"~'. Rabbi David Llfshutz (Yeshivas R' Yitzchak Elchanan) N""f.re.l.

22 The Jewish Observer. April 1993 This inter-denominational union was ill-conceived, Rabbi Aryeh Schechter and as a result, was destined for organizational SOFER S"TAM paralysis from the very start. 1558 4 lst St. Brooklyn, NY 11218 ut, by the admission ofits own for serving as a bridge over an un­ e make "housecalls." leadership, the SCA is a say­ bridgeable gap, and to attempt to bring B little, do-nothing organiza­ harmony to clashing elements--then, (718) 972-4003 tion. lnaJTAstory(March 16, '93) on why persist in hanging on? Isn't it time l.P. M-""'IN- the SCA's current talent search, the UOJCA and the RCA ended their / • - -,b:::if.v- Debra Nussbaum Cohen reports: "In pointless membership in an organiza­ reality, the representatives of the Re­ tion with neither pragmatic purpose form, Conservative and Orthodox nor ideological justification? • movements have found little that they can, or want to, address jointly.'' While the non-Orthodox constitu­ ililn ':Jlno? 1l'?J1' ents would relish theological discus­ sions within the SCA as well as with ~"l'\!.'n :11·~1r1on-o,?\?."11' other religious groups-"to officially represent world Jewry in dialogue with other religious groups," in its own TORAH EDUCATORS INSTITUTE words-the Orthodox contingent (the Registration is now open for the summer program of 5753 which will be held IYH in UOJCA and the Rabbinical Council of Yerusholayim. Once again, the program which has been recommended and endorsed by Gedolei America) is bound by a clear psak Yisroel, will present an intensive course of study, prepared for Bnei Torah to enable them to develop tl1eir full potential as Mechanchim in Yeshivos and Day Schools. from Rabbi Joseph Soloveichik ?"Olt • prohibiting such dialogue. This leaves Our dedicated staff of Roshei Yeshiva, professional Rabbeim, and prominent Mechanchim, political and social concerns for the will present the full range of subjects vital to tlie success of the rebbe in the classroom. SCA to discuss. Thus, according to We invite motivated individuals possessing higher Yeshiva and (or) Kolle! education, to participate Henry Siegman (the group's executive in this program. vice president from 1965 through Scholarships Are Available 1978), the Synagogue Council is left Recognized for a Yeshiva Teacher's License with "an agenda really outside their For further information contact area of concern. These are issues that RABBIHILLELMANDEL,Dean RABBINACllMANZAKON,Administrator non-religious organizations could deal NY(718)805-l 191 Jerusalem 02 -519-739 with just as well." It is interesting to note that the SCA's current president, Reform Rabbi Jerome Davidson, disagrees. "Our role is to reflect, for the Jewish religious community, what its feel­ ings are on social and political issues like religious freedom, and to harmo­ -<. ··.·• ,c,'.@ ntze and bridge some of the differ­ ~~ CATERERS.~:.:1, ences that persist between various religious groups," he said. The insistence of the RCA and the ..- .. _..... offer$ _...... · _. ·.... UOJCA to maintain their membership Glatt C'fter;tt;ig in the SCA in spite of Rabbi Ko~~er Soloveichik's severe limitations, and . ..-a.t leading ~yna~qgqe$, the outright prohibition of other major ·~;.~~· figures, has been a sertous point ofcon­ · ..,.,:;:. I-Iotels & Country Clubs· tention between Agudath Israel of America, as well as the rest of the 3 .··. throughout the Chareidi world, and the two "Modem metropolitan• a,rea. Orthodox" organizations. lfby the SCA leadership's own admission, the orga­ nization is not going anywhere-except CALLRABBIMORRlSWOLOFSKY: (718) 849•88'17 -Word of Rabbi Soloveichik's passing reached us as we are on press. The Jewish Obseroer, April 1993 23 ·wften CU)Jmens 9?rarers ,4re CU)eff cv~ . d.. .. "Aliya Ruchanit ": Spiritual ['.'~~··· betzibbur, or answer to the Kaddisll- Ascent vs. Getting High on 2. They did not hear the Torah Religion reading. They were not permitted to, ~~' in accordance with the stipulations of ligious belief and practice Rabbi Sacks. Instead, the Silira was bring one closer to G-d. It fol­ read from a Chwnasll- R!ows, then, that one should The gain? In the words of partici­ achieve a degree of loftiness-a taste pants: of ruchnius, or spirituality-as a re­ Several women were moved to sult of a genuine, religious encounter. tears. "It's the most amazing thing to Sometimes, though, the "religious" hear a woman leyning (reading from the Torah) if you·ve never heard it be­ high is induced by dubious means, fore," said Doreen Fine. such as musical sessions ofquestion­ She a&led: "Within the conditions. able content or inappropriate perfor­ we made the absolute best of what we mances ... sermons or rituals that re­ could." flect pagan rites, Christian liturgy, or Celia Levy, whose home provided trendy causes such as ecology, radi­ the venuefor the seroice, said: "For the first time as a woman. I felt important cal feminism, or global pluralism. In spiriJ:ually. It was a lovely atmosphere. such cases, there is no doubt as to Isn't it clear that the and such a positive experience." (JTA, whether the inspiration is of a Jewish, Mar. 5, ·93) spiritual nature, or just an emotional feminist agenda burdens Some Questions: Must a woman lift. It should be obvious. take the lead in services, and perform At times, the act can be religiously tefilla with an extra in the manner of men. to feel "impor­ authentic, but so driven by other tant spiritually"? Does the man who agendas, that the spiritual content, if load-a proving ground lights Sabbath candles in his dining there at all, gets lost on the way. for egalitarianism-a room. in his wife's absence. feel "im­ An exchange comes to mind between portant spiritually:· and find himself, the Kotzker Rebbe and a foUower who load it is not meant to for the first time, having "such a posi­ hadjust completed an exceptionally tive experience"? long. intense Shmoneb Esrei. carry? Or does he find himself a bit out of The Rebbe; "You really poured your sorts, and missing his wife even more soul into thattefilla. didn't you?" than when he was cooking the The Talmid (dropping his eyes, smil­ Torah and Megilla reading, and chicken soup that afternoon? ing modestly): "I did my best. Rebbe." such-giving women more active Isn•t it obvious that one of the costs The Rebbe; "Do you know what G-d roles in these activities, when even offeminism is that itimposes a sense does with tefillos like yours?" halacha and tradition throw serious of unworthiness on women, and Talmid (wide-eyed): "No. Please teU questions on these choices. The re­ forces them to assume masculine me,Rebbe." sponse by the participants? Nothing roles to which they may not be The Rebbe: "A Malach is appointed ID short of ecstasy. For example: suited? Isn't it equally clear that the catch every breath. He hands it carefelly • In London, the ladies of the feminist agenda burdens tejilla with to a Malach on a higher rung-and so it Stanmore Community Synagogue re­ an extra load-a proving ground for is passed on. upward until it reaches the acted to Chief Rabbi Jonathan egalitarianism-a load it is not meant Almighty on His Throne.... ·· Sacks's restriction against holding to carry? Talmid: "And then?" women's services in the synagogue Tefilla, after all, is the ultimate ex­ Rebbe: "He roUs it up inlD a tight little building (see JO. March. ·93) as a pression of bittul hayesh-self-abne­ wad and hurls it inlD the abyss, where mandate to convene such a gathering gation. How can words of tejilla carry it sinks under the weight ofits own self­ in a private home. What was lost in one's entreaties up to their ultimate importance." the trade-off? destination when they are so Some people have been experi­ 1. No opportunity to recite weighted down with self-Important menting with Jewish rituals-tefilla, Kedusha. participate in tejilla posturtng!

24 The Jewish Obseroer. Aprtl 1993 Halacha-By Public Demand? than extraordinary." In light of the for ways to enhance one's Avodas grave halachic questions, that boast Hashem (Divine service), then details nother example is the reading should be amended to read, 'The lack of halacha will not be ignored, nor will of Meglllas Esther by a relay­ of seriousness ... was nothing less restrictions be circumvented. Con­ A team of five women and three than extraordinary." formingwith the minutiae of halacha men in Rabbi Avi Weiss's (Orthodox) From anothervantage point, there is the starting point of any genuine Hebrew Institute of Riverdale, this are questions-what prompted this splrttual growth experience. If unful­ past Purim morning. This exciting exercise, and where is it Ieadlng? As filled expectations and other frustra­ perfomance was flawed ln execution reported in a story on the incident tions plague the congregants, which by such grave halachic consider­ (NewYorkJewish Week, Mar. 12, '93): would not be unusual tn today's tur­ ations as the ability of women to read "I feel strongly about this evolution bulent social climate, ideally the rabbi the Megilla on behalf of men, the in Jewish life." said Marcel Linden­ would do his best to address these Talmud's definition ofrequisite k'vod baum. who came {to Riverdale] from problems, not indulge in them. Oth­ hatzibbur, as well as clear proscrip­ Manhattan's Upper West Side. 'To the erwise, the "high" experienced is a tions against kol isha. Rabbi Weiss extent that halacha will pennit women dangerous step in "an evolutionary to.find a more equal role, it's going to acknowledged the problem of the va­ come only if. .. a large enough nwnber process" akin to the Conservative's lidity ofa woman's Megillareading for ofpeople demand and support it. "-As continual abandonment of ritual men (the "listeners vs. readers di­ though to suggest codifYing halacha on norms these past 90 years; a tragic lemma"), yet he proudly crowed, 'The the basis ofpublic demand! slip downward instead of the tnspir­ seriousness and sensitivity to the mi­ When the driving force behind an ing ascent of an aliya ruchanit that nutiae of halacha was nothing less unusual action is a genuine search religious experience is meant to be.•

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The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 25 Libby Lazewnik

And Thou Shalt Love

Consider the diamond. A gem like a rose And this is my struggle, and this is my fight It swallows the light and spits out rainbows To weed out in me what reflects not the Light But the Giver of Life, He passed right over those: To gladly embrace what's decreed from on high A diamond's dead rock, for all its grand pose. To comprehend Who, though I may not know Why.

The moon, like a pearl in the sky-such a sight Each moment's a groping, a plowing through mist ls another dead rock, reflecting the light (He holds all the secrets in His mighty Fist) Of the sun, inferno of fearsomest fame While I, tested often, enfeebled by strife But who set match to that great ball of flame? Still strain to distinguish dead matter from Life.

And the stars spin so fast that they seem to go slow Begone, bubbling anger; shut tight, wrathful eye And the grass grows so slowly it seems not to grow Away with self-pity, that so-mournful sigh. I know very little, but this much I know: They blind me, these things. They make me un-whole He is the Mover Who makes it all go. They crumble and break me. They shatter my soul.

My sleep is adorned by sweet images, dreams And the diamond, it twinkles; the moon, it still shines The night takes a bow right on schedule, it seems And I nibble reality, bite at a time. The trees greet the morning, the flower's unfurled I do not see much, but this much I see: When He, with a flick of His Will, wakes the world. There's something that He wants to teach only me.

Diamonds I like, and the sun blazing high My days have a beauty descended from pain Horizons of hills underlining the sky Like fine hammered gold, I am beaten again I lavish my love on inanimate things And again. And each time my chastened heart glows And yet, V'Ahavta-for Him my soul sings. With fresh understanding, and love that still grows.

Ubby Lazewnlk, a published poet and author of stories for youth, lives in the Har Nof section of Jerusalem. Her 'The Traveler and the Prtncess" was featured in JO, May '92.

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26 The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 and so does common sense. I have heard horror stories of 40 children with one Rebbe. I don't care how good that Rebbe is-he is not reaching all 40 students. Letters Then there is the Russian reality, which causes me great anguish. I am ••••••••••• to the sure that most of the homes of my ••••••••••• Russian students looked like the Editor cover of the Kislev JO-the Menorah that was distributed in our Torah Umesorah Day School, and a timely evergreen tn the background. What have I done about it? Not all that much. There's no time during the CHINUCH: WHY THINGS ARE NOT ktnd to me tn providtng many a spur· week, and by Shabbos my husband of-the-moment einfaU (tnspiration) tn and I are left with barely enough AS GOOD AS THEY COULD BE/ SHOULD BE my classroom, but I'd ideally prefer to be able to have it written in the plan book before the actual class. After all, To the Editor, "einsomchin al haness-one may not n•rE$'.t·~~~~~~I,~ As I flipped through the recent edi­ rely on miracles." Even worse, a 't:J'Ti"? •... 'tt1ffi.·~~,~~· tion of JO, I felt the same sense of Rebbe's "extra-curricular" jobs take 1n:tr'"iW"'k "'1on1Z1 l'.:l'.!"'lhl:I helplessness as I did when reading time away from the all-Important out­ ; , Availhbl~al, the Chanuka edition about kiruv. My of·classroom effectiveness, such as feeling of wanting so much to help vs. staying after school for a good LEK1..ITSI the reality that my husband and I are shmooze with a talmid. Often, this is ~r.1...;~~k',11~b•ij>··· stretched to our absolute limits where the real chinuch takes place, to;\illest47th s1teei, Jloowso,a causes me excruciating pain. In the and many times it affects decisions • Now\tJ~k,j\jY10~3~ •• ··•·· ... ·. _·• Jan. '93 edition, Rabbi Moshe regardtng a student continutng tn Ye· 121z) 719·F1? • .•. ·••••··••·. Silberberg's plea for funds to help shiva High School. When a Rebbe is 21J.v91u~lls~n'lb~1'.hi.~)'eli.\ .·· young Russian olim in Eretz Yisroel is forced to race to another job, such MeHl.'llsh;.Megtlos•ancl'.fb1.mu«J• heart-rendtng and no one can deny golden opportunities are lost. Pmc!'l!d~o~~~~·~m19bu11jif·•••···•r; the paramount importance of saving Economic difficulties have also ·· ~l!)bJ.lg Y,~sl\j~ a.!'!J 1l~tl!~ .. \J these "neshomalach." but at this time contributed to over-crowdtng tn our rep~li!U~!f qf.v~l~l\)ef~1Jl•Ofi!1"fl).t ·.. • • I think that the public must realize classrooms. Halncha dictates the op· •..-RICE: •!!•!llJ ..../l!l VQ~Mfl . that a similar, yet more subtle holo­ timum number of students tn a class, Pitkei liVo~ a11i:iilable caust is happentng here tn the U.S. The state of chinuch(Torah educa­ tion) in America is at a dangerous point. Although I think that most mechanchtm (Torah educators) are better prepared than ever, tn terms of . [i1 their tratntng and understanding of their students and their diverse needs, economic realities either force the best mechanchim out of chinuch (~ITOL altogether, or force them to take on HOTEL t MOTEL extra jobs simply to make ends meet. Chinuch itself is a 24-hour -a-day vo­ WEEKEND cation, with teachers worrying about LAKEWOOD, NEW JERSEY BAR MITZVAHS their students' progress as parents do Madison Avenue; Corner of 7th Street for their children (sometimes even SHEVA BROCHOS more). Any extra responsibilities on SHABBATONS the part of a Rebbe greatly detract (201} 363-5000 from classroom effectiveness tn terms SEMINARS of sharpness and awareness (and 1-800 CAPITOL (227-4865} awakenessl) that are necessary for Catering under supervision of KCL Vaad HaKashrus of Lakewood good classroom management. Hakadosh Baruch Hu has been very

The Jewish Obseroer, April 1993 27 ko'ach to enjoy our own young cllil­ edge that if one of the children needs dren. When you live on five to six braces, it won't send the parents to a hours of sleep a night, although you gemach. know that Shabbos is in reality for The fact that teachers are under­ spirttual menucha. the need for a "no­ paid is not news. It has always been s tress day" unfortunately super­ that way. But the situation has be­ sedes. For two people whose life­ come intolerable. Mechanchim are blood is teaching others and reaching daily entrusted with the most valu­ out, this is an awful way to live. able asset of Kial Yisroel and are ex­ The bottom line, though. is that pected to cultivate it so that it reaches our students are paying the price be­ its highest potential. Each and every cause their teachers could be so Jewish child is a diamond that needs much more effective if yeshivas paid a top-notch cutter who can concen­ enough to make ends meet-no, to be trate on brtnging out as much brtl­ able to breathe a little with the know!- liance as possible. Who would entrust a raw diamond to someone who is sleep-deprived and rushing off to an­ other job? How can the Am HaSefer tolerate such conditions for chinuch THESIDDUR habanim? There must be a serious change tn the mind-set of every Yui tn YOU'VE America. We must all make chinuch and kiruv the top priortties, even at the expense of other. more "exciting" BEEN projects. If we don't wake up and re­ alize what's gotng on, we're gotng to WAITING chas v'shalom lose a generation of maggidei shiw: Frumkeit tn America- 1993 looks tmpressive on the outside, FORll but as a momh and wife of a Rebbe, I see a lot that is lacking on the tnside. We must think of ways to finan­ cially aid our yeshivas. We must re­ structure values in our communities so that every Jew bears his responsi­ bility and the onus does not fall on the [fill es! No expense has been spared in producing a truly "Davenable" Siddur ~ to be used around the year and guide you in '11 n"M!I» as never before! rtch. In order to do that, every Yid must realize that this is not another ! n':i"' n,!731"3 1'1"3!1 ''worthy cause"-it's the hemshech of • nt11l of the Siddur R' Wolf Heidenheim (Redellieim) Kial Yisroel. Baruch Hashem, our • M"il,, ntiu • ''V'tl and )ll M1'0 • tl'O printed in full • Important Halachos pertaining to Tefillah; generation has seen incredible with tl"11"1) M)'Otl tp'O!:I growth in Torah and shmiras • 1'1~1'!:1tll"I S'1'11tlll hamitzvos. Let's make sure that we Source references of the Tefillos, Nusach, are maalin b'kodesh. Agudath Israel Halacha and P'sukim has, Baruch Hashem, been success­ • ;M"l't" n,.1))1 'Oli'!t ful in arousing Kial Yisroel to its re­ on Hoshanos, Slichos, sponsibilities before. I implore your and Yotzros • Piyuttim leadership not to waste another day. and Zemiros by and address this crucial issue. R' Yehuda Halevi, • ))l:)l:>!:l >mn ll'!:l1J W'l~ PCP 11!>" NAME WflliHEW BY REQUEST and Ibn Ezra that 1\1« 1\1< 1':l' tl';l 1i:>K •i:Q Kl!').'( P:ll Ui'nln o~;J:)';li m'J':i n n;n~ x•:iil'J (TO PRarECT MY JOB) appeared in early Siddurim •••• 1<';1ti1om i1i.1i:i11111•011 nx and were deleted over the years •t1t1'1'!:1 corrected, edited and researched from the original sources ADDRESSING PAIN GLOBALLY CHARTS for: Halachic problems coming up during Davening • Z'manim of sunrise, 11ll'?Y' and 'U"iP AND COMPREHENSIVELY 1'11'01'1 '~))It)) A luach of Tefillos and Halachos for the entire year

Hagaon R' Nlsslm Karet/tz Shi/ta NUSACH ASHKENAZ • HARDCOVER 6" X 9" • 620 pages ;n:at),,ll'lll""~ I To the Editor: ,nonn vn;:i11 v111J ffil'l>nl 'mim tl l:>'l" Ideal for a truly meaningful gift I 0»11<1 Oill:> m:i';lm n11P11 ,mrunn pi AVAILABLE AT ALL FINE HEBREW BOOKSTORES When I opened, recently. your ••.. mu1:> ':i11m n':iwm ':op n:i1:i':i or call (718) 436-8238 I January '93 edition ofJO to the table of contents, my eyes moved past the

28 The Jewish Observer, April 1993 various titles and fell upon the article aside time for Torah study, yet entitled, 'The Pain of the Single and struggles in his Torah-learning pro­ Childless Woman." On one hand I cess: At great sacrtfice to self and fam­ was happy to see the topic of pain ad­ ily, he makes the effort to reach closer Ulrge Selection of; dressed, especially by so expert and to the word of Hashem And yet, even •BORSALINO sensitive an author. On the other while studying, he is beset with a •BILTMORE hand, I could not help but wonder sense of inadequacy, of stagnation, of •STETSON •PANIZZA how the stngle and childless women abandonment, of shame. • RAFFAELLI would feel by betng singled out as a 2. The pain of the marlied person, minortty in that way. Is it the pity of struggling to establish a respectful, the majolity that they are really look­ loving relationship: Perhaps the pain SHIRTS o TIES o ACCESSORIES ing for? of a truly good person unable to affect Daily 11:30. 7 '63 lll• Shel Pain is not, nor has ever been, the a bad marrtage. Perhaps the patn of a Sun. 10:30 • 6 -··T--1 monopoly ofa specific group ofsuffer­ person who recognizes something Tu.s. 2:30 • 7 ~1~ 46•7420 ers. Pain is an unconditional part of wrong, wants so much to tmprove his the human condition. The spiritually/ emotionalJy healthy person acknowl­ edges his pain, learns to balance it with joy and with inner peace; to uti­ lize it to further accomplishment. The spilitually/emotionally unhealthy the hat rack person denies his pain even while wal­ 5416 16th Avenue, Brooklyn, N.Y. lowing in it, thus bringing upon him­ self even more pain, and hurling, too, (718) 871-2278 those around him in the process. The greatest gift we can give the single or childless woman (after we have given <§;• the basic needs we are humanly ca­ ((STETSON'}) pable of) is to humbly acknowledge, to ourselves and to them, the common element of pain that all of us, as hu­ ~.~?JY mans, share together. This penetrat­ ingly honest admission ties all of us KANGOL·LONDONFOG together in a common bond of under­ standing and sensitivity. CAPS• TIES It is to Mrs. Adahan's credit that tn her article, as well as in all of her books, her approach of spllitual heal­ ing is not limited to a specific type of pain, but rather addresses the uni­ .. versal condition of human prun. Her words are readily accessible to any person to help him or her focus upon ''~lfll{l'ttlt8:,~""~libi!~;"iJffJaf~ij,$ .. his own situation and improve it. In­ , ',,' "' , ,,, ',', /> deed, it is not Mrs. Adahan to whom my letter is addressed, but to The ,/J'ftd all afits i{liJlu'nt~~ts- . _. ·-..... -•· ., ·-••·· Jewish Obseroerl .· ~xtenti-tkeirdeepestgra~itutle a_~~litJn~sflJ The universal human condition of pain that 1 am referrtng to is some­ AlilllJA'l'lllS/MBL.fJFA.MBltlCA thing I would like to see addressed · ...... _., f'~Yi#g~nerliJ~ilJl!J~e~tktrp'«ftJie~rs- i~ hetpi~g more clearly by The Jewish Obseroer. The individual, by having his or her '/!1'1J.1Jid.e/aadfarfbe, neetlie,srjamilfe$.ofaut:C'a.'{ftmunifa!.··•·• struggles more openly discussed, would find him- or herself identified °rhfS. "el{fS; grqnt '<>f,~15, ()00,.iJnS;U~ett" t#!it eflt,~ 'di fhes~ •.. ·. and strengthened, and would more {amities enjoyed a C.hag Kasher/Ve Same~hfc easily take part in the unit of Kial ':-~/->'___ - __ >,>--:" -/_>--:_->_------r:,-> - _: '":-: -_ --:-:- '<,_>__ -:'/_":-_:- :------< ----; _____ ::--~:-__ -:'-----::_<_-:i:- Yisroel, with honesty and vigor. Here >• ~~ajtHfifbetr!~~fS t,hestaff(lflda~1/l/ni~tr~fiotJ••·(}f are some specific examples of the uni­ many versal pains I am referring to; ~#tlJl.tli tsnte1 ()t;Amertcaf,Qt;allt~e wotillif_iful~hi~gS;jhey;do, 1. The pain of the person who sets

The Jewish Obseroer, AprU 1993 29 pg or her way of interaction but does not thodox Jewry today. As such, JO has tears of frustration and helplessness-­ knowhow. a huge responsibility to address the of the unawareness of our communi­ 3. Tue pain of the dedicated parent, real issues that reach the hurt of the ties and families of the emotional and wanting so much to see his or her individuals that together make up the physical strains of caring for our loved child nurtured and developed to po­ unit, not only to institutionalize, but ones who had cared for us. tential, yet finds little or no under­ to personalize. It hurts me to see Baruch Hashem people are being standing around. Tue pain of the par­ those issues go, at large, unad­ blessed with artchas yomim But. we ent who sees his or her child suffer­ dressed. no longer live in the Alte Heim mode. ing abuse or neglect, obvious or RABBI NAFTOLI BASSMAN where the extended families live(! to­ subtle, and the parent helpless to Lakewood. NJ gether and responsibilities were stop it. shared. Because of our fragmented 4. Tue pain of the person who feels INVESTING IN THE FUTURE BY society, the responsibilities of cartng severed. rn, from Hashem Aban­ CARINGFORTHEAGED-NOW for the elderly parent usually falls on doned and uncared for. Unable to one member who has to juggle trust that Hashem accepts or takes spouse/ children/parent/job I and care of all of His children's needs: To the Editor: home, and still be a pillar of strength. ~ ':>:i ,., ;11!!))1'1. 1 just returned from our daily trip We all daven .. Al tashlicheinu l'eis 5. The pain of the individual, longing to the Radiation Unit at Methodist zikna--Do not cast us aside in our old to be a good person and not knowing Hospital. I accompany my grand­ age:· and. Baruch Hashem, in our how to. wanting to give to others and mother for her daily treatment and communities children are shoulder­ not knowing when, longing to learn today's visit was the catalyst for this ing the dual responsibilities of cartng his own strengths and not believing long-planned but never-executed for their parents and their children. he has any. letter. But there is a feeling of Isolation and 6. Perhaps the most basic pain of all, Today 1 met a young.frum woman frustration in dealing with this the pain of weakness, of helplessness, who had brought her mother in for beracha/ dilemma. Perhaps Agudath or powerlessness. Of not being able to her first treatment. She was very dis­ Israel of America could address thls alter the course ofworld events, of not traught because she could not afford growing concern by having Gedolim being able to control even family to pay the 20% that Medicare would speak publicly about our halachic members or self, except with the help not cover for their daily ambulance obligations to the elderly and give of Hashem one step at a time. transport. Because of information chizuk to those who have undertaken As difficult as these areas are to that 1 had acquired. 1 reassured her to help provide a saiva tova. This honestly address. the consequence of that if she would discuss thls with the would be in conjunction with support not addressing them is denial. And financial office, the hospital would groups where professionals and pri­ the consequence of denial of a prob­ absorb the cost. mary caregivers would share infor­ lem is denial of the solution to the This exchange of information led to mation and encouragement. problem: inexcusable! conversations and confidences, ofwor­ We say amein when someone The Jewish Obseroer is certainly ries and guilts, of medical problems, of bentches us .. biz a hundert un one of the most articulate and re­ family and social problems that pri­ tzvantzig yohr,.-and we hope that sponsible English publications of Or- mary caregivers bear. We cried unshed one day our children will care for us

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30 The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 in our old age i1"'N-so we must ad­ Jn the same January issue of JO eryone would voluntarily add ma'aser dress the issue now. It's our invest­ there were four advertisements for (I 0%) to their camp bill as a donation, ment in our future. American girls' summer camps in or "adopt" a Russian child, numerous NAME WrrnHEW BY REQuEsr EretzYtsroeL If a four-week overnight neshamos could be saved from the The reader is referred to a sympo­ camp in America costs approximately shmad (spiritual death) that threat­ siwn on the topic. "When the Elderly Be· $1,100, I can only guess how expen­ ens our Russian brothers. come Depemient. " held at the Nationnl sive a summer tour in Eretz Yrsroel Perhaps people are becoming a bit Convention qfAgu.dilthlsrael ofAmerica must be. I am not denigrating the im­ numb to such calls to action, but Kial in 1988, with Rabbi Reuvein Feinstein. portance of such camps, or the Yisroelcan ill afford complacency. For Dr. Jacob Mermelstein and Rabbi Dovili unique experiences they can offer. a relatively small cost we can save Grossman in participation. Tapes of the What I would like, though, is to sug­ many. Hashem has presented us session are available. gest the following idea: with the opportunity; it is up to us to People are spending hundreds and act. "If not now, when?" SUMMER CAMPS: sometimes thousands of dollars on MRS. M. FABIAN A CRITICAL NECESSITY sending their children to camp. If ev- Unsdorf. Jerusalem

To the Editor: Want your kids to love to read? The important benefits that sum­ Try these treats from ArtScroll mer camp can provide are widely rec­ ognized. For some. though, a camp expertence is not merely pleasant or New in the ArtScroU Middos Series! Carefully chosen illus- BAT-'EM-IN BENJIE beneficial-but critical. Jn Eretz ! trations and com­ Yisroel summer camps for Russian ments teach the CHANIE FRIEDMAN, that master of children are very often a crucial first lessons of the mish­ Seuss-like rhyme, JS back. touch­ step in bringing these youngsters to nah. and bring time­ ing all bases in a Torah education. A child denied the less wisdom to a new teaching prioritles opportunity of camp is not deprived generation. By Rabbi and what scoring · simply of a fun time, but possibly of a i A vie Gold; illustrated big really means. Torah life. Children who do not attend by Michael Horen a religious program often end up in and Andras Halasz. r"'("' municipal secular camps. The influ­ ence of such camps is not dtfficult to Im•••••• New from '"...,"'.Books imagine. Rabbi Silberberg's letter (Jan. ·93 THEN I GOT THREE SCOOPS MANNY'S A THIEF JO) included a tragic example that Follow the ups and downs A charming book that of life with David as puts a new twist on the occurred in Eretz YlsroeL A program geared for Russian teenagers was se­ Grandpa shows that not old game of "telephone", verely cut back due to lack of.funds. everything is the way it and brings home the 111is program had a 50% success rate seems, and something damage that can be -"';''"''·'l":;_ ...t.i;4~- "bad" may really be won- done by spreading a in enrolling its participants in reli­ 1 gious schools. Jn addition to the derful rumor Written & illustrated by GETZEL Written & illustrated by GETZEL sleep-away camps, day-camps are run for younger children. These day­ A great new series tor 8~ 14 year olds! camps charge a minimal fee per child, A SMILE FOR SAMMY yet they can not function without out­ Br@©h~ rt.rt. side support. Sensitively, Chassi. Leah, Devori, Elisheva. and Yocheved subtly - and were burstmg wlth energy and filled with fun. entertaining­ They formed the Brookville Chesed Committee ly - SARA - and had a host of excitmg. hilanous, fun. STERN paints filled adventures. So will you. a word por­ as you join them m - trait of the #4SECRETS suburban Chassi has two big secrets, Weintraub Yet keeping secrets can lead ' .. -----·-·-·--~~.-~:' Family and to trouble, and that's no adventures 4916 13th Ave.,B'klyn, NS. 11219 exception in Chassi's case. By (718) 854·291 I Tzipora Elian Availabie now at Hebrew booksellers or call 1·800-MESOR.A.H Jn NYS· {718) 92 J-9000 /FAX· (7] 8) 680-1875

The Jewish Observer. April 1993 31 A RIDE ON THE "RUSSIAN VAN" Avenue Bus durtng the days of Rabbi I seldom have to resort to this mode (as it is affectionately called in Levy ';"~r's Bais Yaakov of Crown of transportation .... Flatbush-Boro Park} Heights, where children actually Baruch Hashem for the mini-van, stood up to give their seats to adults.) a vehicle that demonstrates that the I have gotten safely on the bus shortest traveling distance between To the Editor: (Baruch Hashem!) only to find that a two points is a straight line, and Since moving back to Brooklyn, I woman getting on the bus after me, shows that there are people who live have had the occasional misfortune had her pocket picked by the teen­ Kiddush Sheim Shamayim, as the of having to use public transporta­ ager pretending to be on line behind Novominsker Rebbe called for in his tion-namely, the Coney Island Av­ her. I have been warned at the bus address (JO, Feb. '92).1 think the van enue Bus. I have personally wit­ stop to hug my pocketbook "as if it should be called 'The Chessed Line," nessed teenagers terrortzing elderly were an infant" to make sure that it based on the rtde I took today, dur­ people. (I contrast this in my mind could not be grabbed easily (in day­ ing which: with fond memortes of the Tomkins light!). I can only thank Hashem that a lady, holding both baby and stroller, was cheerfully {and voluntar­ ily} assisted by an anonymous woman ISRAEL'S passenger; the driver insisted on retrieving RENT-A-CAR No. 1 money that this same woman dropped on her way out-in order to save her the trouble, but TYPE OF CAR someone else jumped to pick it up to save the driver the trouble: a lady up front heard a sneeze fur­ A FIAT UNO STING ther back and generously offered tis­ B PEUGEOT 205 AC ·~·------sues; C PEUGEOT 309 1.4 224 1 younger people got up to give older --c- APPL_A,,U_Se ii·------23s 2 people seats (and it's not easy to -2 PEUG§9_T 405 1.:~--- 280 stand up in a crowded van!); M MINIBUS FORD 455 Yeshiva of Brooklyn girls remained . ' standing in the middle of the van, not D CHARADE 1.3 231 occupying the nearby seat, to leave it E APPLAUSE 1.6 294 for others: F APPLAUSE 1.6 P.S 322 an obviously pregnant woman -·------G _____SIERRA ,.1.8 ____ " ___ _ 420 stood shyly in a corner, while numer­ L SUBARUSW 420 ous people offered her their seats, un­ ---·------USA A CANADA K GMC SAFARI PS 525 til their persistence paid off, and she X PEUGEOT 405 1.9 800-938-5000 finally sat down. IN NY: 212·629·6090 XL VOLV0740 And all this took place durtng the ------! ten minutes it takes to get from Kings Highway to 18th Avenue. Just imag­ ine the chassodim that must have oc­ curred between there and 10th Av­ enue (I'm sorry I missed it!). "Mi k'amcha YisroeU" How beauti­ ful are Your People, Hashem. in the The Golden midst of this "Me Generation" Galusl Sounds of the In a world where families treat their own like strangers, how fortunate are Original Pirchei we to be part of a world where strang­ and JEP records ers treat each other like family! 'Ashreinu, ma tov chelkeinuf" have been re-released on MALK! ANTEBY quality cassette tapes! Brooklyn. NY

all Jewish ~·~------·------Now available at PLEA FOR LABELS ON book and record stores DONATED GARMENTS individually or in reduced -·------·---~- price, 9 volume set. To the Editor: I'd like to present my quandary to the public in the hope that an easy

32 The Jewish Observer, April 1993 solution be found. As the coordinator of a used-clothtng center tn Jerusa­ lem. Beged Yad LeYad, which is part of a loose network affiliated with Yad Eliezer's multifaceted relief program Subscribe now to tn Jerusalem, my counterparts and I are constantly being faced with the The Jewish Obsener shatnez-checktng problem. Stnce we cater to a mixed public. tncludtng Russian begtnners taktng and$AVE baby steps in Yiddishkeit, regular baalei teshuva and elements in the population naively trusting that "if Become a monthly subscriber someone wore it before them, it's OK. .. to The Jewish Observer and we feel it very necessary to pre-check save up to 47% off the single­ items that come tn: basically men's and women's woolen suits and coats. copy price (a savings of over After much negotiation, we have suc­ $40.). The longer you sub­ ceeded tn obtatntng the services of a scribe for, the more you save. certified checker for half the usual price. This runs us about $300 a And this introductory offer is fully guaranteed. You have but to ask and you will receive month, a cost which we cannot al­ a prompt refund on any undelivered issues should you decide to cancel at any time, if ways pass on to the public. (And the for any reason. service were quicker and we had a larger budget, we'd be checktng all of Each month, The Jewish Observer will be delivered directly to your door, fil!ed our woolen skirts as well, which we with the views of leading Torah thinkers on current issues. .comments on the don't do. yet.) strengths and foibles within the Jewish community ... analysis of contemporary We, too, would like to rely on the I Jewish events ... inside reporting, interpretive commentary, inspiring biographies, religious probity of our sources, infuriating letters and illuminating responses-all within the covers of one magazine, which is usually a chareidipublic. We The Jewish Observer. are thus hard-put to understand why So don't delay. Check the money-saving terms below and send in your order right so few SHATIVEZ-FREE labels appear away. We'll try to get your order filled in time for our very next issue. in anything we get. Where are all those labels??? This letter will, hopefully, brtng a :------· SUBSCRIPTION SAVINGS CERTIFICATE : solution to our problem: Please de­ THE~H Suite 1200 • 84 William Street I I mand that a label or certification be UBSER\tfR New York, N.Y. 10038 sewn or stamped inside each gar­ I USA 'OUTSIDE I ment, testifying to its kashrus in D YES! Please enter my subscription for: I terms of shatnez. It will make it so ONLY USA much easier for the next person to 0 3 years-at 47°/o off the cover price $48 0 S84 wear this garment. 0 2 years-at 40°/o off the cover price $36 0 S60 SHEINDEL WEINBACH, COORDINATOR 0 1 year - at 2 7°/o off the cover price $22 0 S34 BEGEDYADLEYAD *Price reflects $12 extra per year to defray air shipping costs. Foreign Panim Meirot J, Mattersdoif, Je111Salem payment must be made in U.S. dollars, either by check drawn on a bank in the U.S.A. or by Visa or MasterCard.

NAME {Please print) ______COMPUTERS: A TWO-EDGED SWORD ADDRESS------CITY, STATE ______ZIP _____ To the Editor: Tzvi Schindler's article, "Booting 0 Enclosed: $ 0 Charge my D MasterCard D VISA Up To Torah," (JO Jan. '93) brought out some interesting observations on Acct.LL!No. . I I I I I I I I I I I I I I the computer, but fell far short of the mark tn its attempt to potnt out some Expiration date: [I] {month) [I] (year) of the potential pitfalls of this technol­ Signature ______ogy to the Orthodox Jew, ignortngar­ The Jewidi Observer is published monthly except July and Augu>t. Please allow 4-6 week> for delivery. eas of great importance. (He surely did not mean to be taken literally in ------

The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 33 Q?A ...... J------~ 1~~! regard to relying on back-up as con­ with the chinuch of our children. strate how the computer might teach trary to bitachon. so I won"t comment Imagtne: a child is sitttng by the com­ Lashon Hakoclesh. imagine that you further on that point.) puter. He sees an Aleph on the screen, are readtng somethtng and the word We know how helpful computers while a digitized human voice says, Aish is highlighted. You click your can be in business applications, viz., "Aleph." Some time later, he sees a mouse on the word. and suddenly word processors, spreadsheets, data Bais with a kametz under it. That you see and hear a blazing inferno bases. desktop publishtng. commu­ same voice announces "Kametz Bais light before your eyes. Additionally, nications. etc. However, how does this Baw" (or Bah or Boo. stnce the par­ stnce there are programs that simu­ apply to us in terms of Torah? ent or Rebbe has chosen whether he late all kinds of things. from flying For one thing. the entire Tana.ch wants Ashkenazic. Sephardic or planes to physics expertments to dis­ and Shas have already been stored on Chassidish pronunciation from a secttng frogs. why not carry it over to CD-ROM. There is also a program menu). Farfetched? Not at all. Such Limudei Kodesh applications? Why that aids sofrim in examining Sifrei programs that deal with the English not simulate the koshering of chick­ Torah. Beyond the aforementioned, language tn a similar manner are al­ ens, for instance? the technology is also there for aldtng ready available. To further demon- Children are not the only ones to benefit from computer technology. CoME ANd pARTicipATE iN A pROGRAM THAT HuNdREds of HEiMisHE Picture how helpful such programs could be to the baal teshuva who does fAMiliES HAVE cliosEN iN THE lAsT 42 YARCHEi ~LIA!; SEMiNARS. THE not have the luxury of betng able to devote a few years of his life lo attend­ Topics discussEd CATER TO YOU, HElpiNG ANd ENCOURAGiNG you TO ing a special yeshiva. Furthermore, build ANd CONSTRUCT A brnrn TOMORROW. besides programs, what about BBS's (Bulletin Board Service), a modem­ equipped computer containing files • that can be shared with other mo- 1 dem-equipped PCs? With a computer and a modem. a bustnessman would be able to attend an on-line Daf HaYomi shiurdurtng his lunch hour, complete with all the give and take of a live session. (Indeed, it really is a live session.) Speaking of telecommuni­ cations, there is plenty of opportunity for on-line kiruvwork. These few ex­ _...... _,_.""; r:::::==== S{tea~ ======::: amples barely scratch the surface when it comes to explortng the enor- RAbbi EzRid TAubER mous potential of the computer. RAbbi Slti111sltoN PiNcus However. the same technology that

RAbbi YisRod RAkowsky i"UJ. CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST DR. BENZION RAbbiTAubrn is THE AUTHOR of: I SIJALl NoTWANT, To BEcoME ONE, SORITTZKIN N.Y. STATE LICENSED Cltoose LifE, DAys ARE Co111iNG A.Nd Di1.RkNESS BEfoRE DAWN. ADULTS FoR ovrn THREE dECAdES prnplE HAVE SOUGHT liis GUidANCE. His METHod AND CHILDREN is siMplE: ExplAiN THE ROOT pRiNciplE of THE ToRAH id TO EMpowrn EAL (718) 633-3248 OTHERS GROW iNTO fulfillEd iNdividuAls. (718) 219-3867 1270, 48rh SmEET, BRooklyN, N.Y. l l 219 lHE To REGiSTER CALL: VISUAL (718)4)5-1041,(718)4>8-0851(718)6)),)005, IMAGE The finest in ( 71 8) 4 '8-7' '2 ( 91 4) ' 5 6,' 5 l 5 ,,-~ Video Production :,,::;; Dan Rscnman

34 The Jewish Observer. April 1993 Q?*

can do so much good contams the ca­ pacity for great evil. Ftrst of all, pro­ grams and BBS's oriented toward Avoda Zora and immorality abound. Th.is, however, is not the only caveat. As Mr. Schindler mentioned, comput­ SARASCHENIRER ers can occupy a disproportionate amount of time and thought, consti­ tuting bttul Torah Games and BBS's SEMINARY present a case in point. Beyond these BROOKLYN, NEWYORK examples, even greater dangers to our entering its 28th year, is pleased to announce that spiritual well-being exist. Pundits are predicting that computers will eventu­ Registration ally replace television and video as the for the 1993-94 (5754) School Year is in progress for the ultimate in entertainment centers. For now. software is avallable that allows INTENSIVE SEMINARY one to watch a program in a small win­ and the regular Half Day Seminary dow. without missing a single stroke under the direction and leadership of the Menaheles on his keyboard. Multi-media is al­ Rebetzin Malka Paretzky ready state-of-the-art, allowing one to produce and view his own animated Sara Schenirer Teachers Seminary is frequently asked to sequences. Perhaps the mostfrigllten­ respond to the following inquiries - our response follows: ing of all is the virtual reality, which Can you define tht: goals of the seminary: has been dubbed an "electronic drug," We seek to create a knowledgeable and inspired young lady who will serve herfami!y the ultimate escape from reality. and her people with the proper priorities and responsibility in Torah-ethics. Beyond merely considering various Do you have living arrangements in the neighborhood: positive and negative points, one must We have maintained a Residence Dorm continuously tor the past 21 years, offering remember that a computer will never toad. lodging, and a warm atmosphere. It is a 3 minute walk from the school, and is replace the Rebbe-talmid relationship very reasonably priced. that is so crucial to the Mesora of To­ Can I train for other skills while attending Seminary: rah. What it can do is help eliminate The immediate neighborhood provides the most successful training schools avail­ much of the competition and pressure able for the religious student in computers, business skills and other areas, that is a serious bane of our current Can I attend the I nstitutefor Special Education in conjunction with my educational system, by providing an Seminary studies: environment in which each student Yes, and our Seminary students are given preferential selection when applying. can progress at his own level. He can Is the neighborhood a safe one: proceed at an accelerated pace with­ While we beseech the protection of Hashem Yisborach everywhere, Bora Park and, out being held back by his classmates, specifically, the area of the school at its center, provide a safe, populated, and dynamic atmosphere of Y!ddishkeit, unequaled anywhere in the United States. Will I benefit even ifl do not intend to become a teacher: A full, vibrant program is offered with the goal of building Torah values, and creating a woman of conscience, while providing the opportunity to train for a teach"mg career as well. What degree is offered upon completion, and do you accept credit earned elsewhere: Sara Schenirer Seminary accepts prior credits from a recognized Seminary program, and confers upon graduates its own widely recognized certificate and a Torah Umesorah Teachers license . . . Is financial aid available: MALOHN Financial aid is readily available to eligible students. MfFAL Rabbi Michael Meisels, Dean VISITING NEW YORK?? Beautiful rooms, wlth kitchen Graduates of high school and those returning tram Eretz Yisroe! are invited to inquire. facilities, in heart of Boro Park Applicants may enter the second year program. by day or week. Near Shuls, Details of the intensive and the Halt-day seminaries. Dormitory facilities, and take,out foods, etc. Profits to registration information available by letter, phone or tax. 4622·14th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11219 (718)633·8557 Fax (718)435·0115 Mifal Torah Vodaas. Call f718) 851 •2969 . NOT.V/s

The Jewish Observer, April 1993 35 if he is particularly bright. and with it cannot easily be dealt with by course, is not anonymous. more repetitions mtnus the shame, if merely assering it. I am not prepared to say that the he is a little slower. I have presented a brief sampling particular mailings I have received Perhaps the biggest fault of of some issues that must be grappled are part of a racket. But we live at a Schindler's article is that he treats a with as computer technology be· time when eveiy tzedakka dollar is critical issue with too much frivolity. comes more and more commonplace. needed for urgent purposes, vouched A computer can be likened to a fire: While it is obvious that off-color soft· for by responsible sponsors. Why when harnessed, it can advance To· ware and BBS's must be avoided, should anonymous solicitations that rah tmmensely, but if left out of con· where do we draw the line on other we know nothing about, systemati­ trol. it can destroy. Unlike television, applications? Baruch Hashem, the cally siphon off tzedakka funds? In Torah provides us with the proper Eretz YisroeL some efforts are pres­ course of action to take. Llke every­ ently being made to put an end to for YOUR thing else, use of the computer is an fraudulent mailings. If we would all FUNDRAISING or issue that our Rabbonim must de­ agree not to send money to anony· PROMOTIONAL CAMPAIGN cide; only they can clarify the grey ar· mous causes, we might be able to do CONSIDER a eas and define the role of these ma· so here, as well! chines in our lives. It is incumbent on BEN MEIR CUSTOM DESIGNED Monsey,NY LUACH or DIARY us to listen to their psak. Only then wili the computer assume its rightful (7 1 8) 851 - 1 3 14 place in our homes. PRIORITIES IN HELPING THOSE (MRS.) DEVORAH SHULMAN IN NEED OF SPIRITUAL Brooklyn, NY ASSISTANCE ------·------CONTROLS ON MAIL To the Editor: nr.i>'ll nNl!J"\; '7!>nn~:n 11r.i7' NJ SOLICITATIONS Could I offer a humble piece of ad· 'O>n "l'Yl vice as regarding the discussion in recent issues, about how and how To the Editor: much outreach is to be done? I do not nn'~ 'Nl'ln Rabbi Hollander's article on com­ think it correct to persuade people to O''n munity controls over tzedakka solici· move out of a makom Torah (see end tations (Sept. '92) brings to mtnd an­ of Aoos). However, even in our own '"l'' ill'VJ)l other uncontrolled situation. A while circles, people tend to neglect those ago, I received a sefer in the mail. heimishe who need extra help, and which I had not ordered. The letter these are also slipping fast. Why enclosed attracted my attention for should the totally unorthodox take two reasons: (a) it asked for $36.00, preference? At least they should be not an inconsiderable amount. and equal. Many. many baalei battim (b)itwassigned, "VaadL'maanEnyia could have had much moreTorah·di· Artzainu Hagdosha"-no names or rected, fulfilled lives tf they had had verifiable location (note the spelling!). more support in their youth. More recently, I received a differ­ My suggestion is, therefore, (bear­ FINE MEN'S CLOTHING" ent sefer which I did not order. This ing in mind a Dibros Moshe in letter, too, asked for $36.00; it was Where each customer is treated Kiddushin, 1st Perek (Daf30] that one "Beis as our only customer! signed YISroer'-no name, and is obligated to give away a tenth of his there was no listing for Beis Ylsroel at ttme for others, as in money) that ev· SALE RACKS the address given (which, of course, eiyone should "donate" without cost, was not the address of the legitimate of course, an hour or so of his ttme for Su;ts $89.00-$145.00 Beis Ylsroel institutions in Brooklyn). helping others besides those to whom S;ngle Bceosted Blozecs $35.00-55.00 Only $25.00 was asked for a some­ one would have been obligated to help what smaller sefersent-to me; the let­ anyway (such as one's children). The ter was signed by "Keren Yedey ALSO choice is up to each individual-either Chessed"-again no name, and no a slower child, a yeshiva baclun; a re­ • Slacks • Rainwear listing for the organization at the tired citizen, or a potential baal 1769 51 St., Brooklyn, NY Broadway address given. teshuva. Perhaps it isn't tax deduct· (718) 854-1196 Earlier on, I received an appeal for Ible, but you get more than you put in. Doily 1 l :00 AM-9:00 P.M. "Ezraih CholiTn," located at a Rockland As the rabbis expressed it: "I learned Fri. & Motzoei Shabbos by oppt. County mall address. This mailing much from my teachers... but most of struck a special chord because there all I learned from my students." Silbiger Suits You Best is an Ezrath Cholirn organization in RABBI C. LAUER Monsey that does great work, and, of Gateshead, England

36 The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 llil!ll='Ill =~rtDT'l::'JUn I t::l.l(J 111~84 It:: The WilliamNational Street/NYC Headquarters 10038'~=='1======of Agudath Israel of America

RELIGIOUS FREEDOM during the fierce snow storm that hit yeshivas were realized In early April, as RESTORATION ACT New York City on March 13. The bless­ lawmakers approved increased appro­ REINTRODUCED IN CONGRESS ing within the misfortune was that the prtations In the new Stale budget both collapse occurred on Shabbos, the one for textbook aid and "mandated ser­ WASHINGTON - The Religious day of the week when no-one is in the vices" reimbursement to non-public Freedom Restoration Act, re-intro­ building. schools. duced in March in the I 03rd Congress. Some 250 students per semester at­ Agudath Israel of Amertca, which Is "a histortc piece oflegislation that is tend COPE lnstitute's computer pro­ had played a key role In the non-public of crttical import to Amertcan citizens of gramming and technology, secretartal school community's fight for the fund­ all faiths," said Agudath Israel of and bookkeeping courses at the site. in ing, hailed the legislative leadership for Amertca, in voicing its strong support addition to faculty and staff. Open six their approval of the approprtations at for the measure. days a week, the building was also a a time of difficult fiscal decision-mak­ Among the speakers from various busy center of activity for the many cli­ ing, as well as a number of Assembly­ religious groups on hand at the press ents who are served by Project COPE, men and Senators from both parties conference at which the bill was intro­ Agudath Israel's job counseling and who were also helpful In this effort. duced was David ZWiebel. general placement program, its English as a The textbook aid appropriation counsel for Agudath Israel. Second Language classes for immi- raises the allotment to non-public The proposed legislation seeks to school students for textbooks to restore fundamental religious liber­ $30 per pupil. up 20% from the al­ ties that were long considered to be location provided for the past nine a matter of basic constitutional years. For yeshivos, the increase rtght until the United States Su­ will mean nearly half a million dol­ preme Court ruled otherwise in the lars more in textbook aid for the q;. controversial "peyote" case of 1990. coming year alone, brtnging the In the aftermath of that decision, total allocation to approximately Agudath Israel worked closely with $2.5 million annually at current Congressional leaders and other or­ enrollment levels, according to ganizations to develop the ortginal Deborah Jacob, Agudath Israel's version of the Religious Freedom associate director for education Restoration Act, upon which the affairs. current legislation is based. The bill The "mandated services" ap­ restores legislatively what was propriation, $57. l million, will taken away judicially. grants from the former Soviet Union brtng the State up to date on its debt to "Without federal law to restore the and other countrtes, and the recently the non-public schools for such func­ liberties denied by the peyote ruling, created Agudath Israel Professional and tions as reporting attendance. keeping any religious practice that ever conflicts Management Employment Services. a immunization records, and administer­ With governmental regulation in this job exchange network for family bread­ ing state tests. By law, non-public country would be vulnerable to attack," winners who have lost their livelihoods schools must be reimbursed for the cost says Abba Cohen, director of the due to the economic tumdown. of these se:rVices -which they are obli­ Agudath Israel Washington Office, In For the short term, COPE classes gated to provide-but In past years the explaining the Importance of the legis­ and Project COPE counseling offices State has fallen behind In its payments lation. have been temporarily relocated in fa­ due to budget cutbacks. President Bill Clinton expressed his cilities swiftly remodeled for the pur­ The new budget approprtates suffi­ support for the legislation In a letter to pose on two floors al 84 William Street cient funds to fully take care of the sponsors of the bill that was read at the In downtown Manhatian. The school backlog -which has accrued to a total press conference. has undertaken comprehensive search of $18 million - and also to make full for permanent facillties In Brooklyn to and timely payment for expenses In the enable it to return to its neighborhood SHABBOS COUAPSE OF COPE coming year. The ortginal budget figure base area as soon as feasible. proposed by the State Board of Regents INSTITUTE BUILDING, IN NYC for mandated services last year would BLIZZARD, SPARES LIVES MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR have fallen $16.4 million short of this FUNDING PROVISIONS FOR NEW objective. It was after an appeal by The loss of property was enormous, YORK NON-PUBLIC SCHOOLS Agudath Israel that the Regents unani­ but the fact that no one was hurt was PASSED IN NYS BUDGET mously adopted the $57.1 million fig­ nothing short of a miracle. ure. Governor Mario Cuomo's sub­ The roof of the two-story domed sequent endorsement of the full appro­ building housing Agudath Israel of ALBANY - Two major legislative prtation, at the urging ofAgudath Israel Amertca's COPE Institute and Job Ser­ gains that will spell millions of dollars and other groups. provided strong im­ vices divisions came crashing down more in funding for New York State petus for its passage.

The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 37 -:::rnDTLJ ll"t~ 84 William Street!NYC 10038•1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 II Un I l::Utl (/;; The National Headquarters of Agudath Israel of America

RUSSIAN TORAH SEMINAR NEAR Afier the group of tenants, residents post-mortem decisions made by others ST. PETERSBURG DRAWS 400 of an apartment complex in Rego Park, on their behalf conform to Jewish law, PARTICIPANTS FROM 16 cmEs Queens, brought suit against the land­ has now been adapted to conform with lord and management agent, a lower the laws of all 50 states as well as the More than 400 participants from 16 New York State court ruled that they District of Columbia. cities attended a recent Torah Seminar indeed had a cause of action, based on The standardized document, devel­ in Russia sponsored by Agudath the Fair Housing Act and the New York oped over months of arduous research Israel's Vaad L'Hatzolas Nidchei Yisroel. State Human Rights Law. The case is and consultation with legal and rab­ binic authorities. has to date generated The retreat, held in Luga - some three now pending before the State Supreme hours from St. Petersburg (formerly Court Appellate Division. thousands of requests and inquiries Leningrad) - lasted five weeks and was from rabbis, physicians, attorneys, hos­ divided into sessions of one and a half NEWEST AGUDAH HOUSING pital and nursing home administrators, to two weeks each, for young men, PROJECT, FOR ELDERLY AND and laymen across the country. young women, and families. HANDICAPPED, IS LATEST IN According to Reb Mordechai NEIGHBORHOOD I 00 RABBONIM GATHER AT Neustadt, chairman of the Vaad PRESERVATION CHAIN AGUDATH ISRAEL HALACHIC L'Hatzolas Nidchel Ylsroel since the in­ CONCLAVE ception of its activities in the dark days BROOKLYN - Scores of elderly and of the early 1980's, the seminar, con­ handicapped citizens have moved in at FLATBUSH - Some 100 morei cluded at the end of February, was one Webster Terrace, the beautiful nine- lwraah of kehillos from a wide spectrum of the most successful ever. of the Torah community came together Leading sessions was a group of here in early March for an intensive seven native Russian kollel scholars conclave on halacha sponsored by the from Yeshiva Shvut Ami in Jerusalem Conference of Synagogue Rabbonim of - including "graduates" of Vaad pro­ Agudath Israel of Amertca. grams from the pre-glasnost years The unusual gathering - attended headed by Rabbi Moshe Pantiliat. exclusively by rabbonim involved in From theyoungmen'ssessionalone, day-to-day psak halacha, and distin­ he said, some 15to20youngmenwho guished with the presence of many na­ attended have now enrolled in yeshivas tionally prominent authorities in the in their home communities, five more field -was an auspicious beginning for are traveling to the U.S. to attend what is being planned as an ongoing American yeshivas under a student ex­ series of such conclaves. change arrangement, and another 15 are to enter yeshivas in Israel. AGUDATH ISRAEL WORLD EXECUTIVE TO MEET IN NETANYA SABBATH-OBSERVANT TENANTS, AFTER SHAWOS BARRED BY ELECTRIC LOCKS BACKED BY AGUDATH ISRAEL Well-attended meetings of both the story building that sits on the comer of Eretz Ylsroel and the Amert can sections A new and different twist in the field Ocean Parkway and Webster Avenue, of the Vaad Hapoel HaOlami (Interna­ of religious rights has arisen in a case In the Kensington neighborhood of tional Executive) of the Agudath Israel now making Its way through the New Brooklyn, between Boro Park and World Organization- held respectively York State court system. in a lawsuit Flatbush. in Jerusalem and New York in March brought by a group of Orthodox Jewish Tue 89-unit building, constructed following consultations with the apartment house dwellers whose land­ specifically for low-income senior and movement's European leaders - de­ lord installed electric locks on the doors disabled residents. is the most re­ cided to convene a worldwide confer­ of their buildings - despite being told cently completed project of the South­ ence in Netanya after the Shavuos Yorn it would prevent the tenants from open­ ern Brooklyn Community Organiza­ Tov. ing them on the Sabbath and Jewish tion (SBCO), a division of Agudath Is­ The conference will open Monday af­ holidays. rael of America. ternoon. May 31, and continue through Petitioning in March for the right to Wednesday, June 2, in the Gale! Sanz me a friend-of-the-court brief in the suit HALACHIC LMNG WILL NOW Hotel, and will deliberate on a broad was Agudath Israel of America. ADAPTED FOR ALL 50 STATES range of problems facing Jewish com­ The locks in question hold doors munities throughout the world, accord­ closed by means of a magnetic force cre­ Agudath Israel ofAmerica's pioneer­ ing to the co-chairmen of the Agudlst ated by an electric current. To open the ing "Halachic Living Will," introduced World Organization, Rabbi Yehuda doors, one must insert a special key two and a half years ago to help obser­ Meyer Abramowitz of Jerusalem and that breaks the electrical current. vant Jews ensure that medical and Rabbi Moshe Sherer of New York.

38 The Jewish Obseroer. April 1993 ••rtDTJ:::'Jlllllllllllllll Un I l:l.111 trt£:'84 It: The WilliamStreetlNYCNational Headquarters 100381":::::======of Agudath Israel of America

BRAVING BUZZARD, 800 ATTEND for the Tomche Shabbos organizations make life and death decisions for an tn­ PIRCHEI AGUDATH ISRAEL ofBoro Park/Flatbush and Queens. to capacltated patient - and grant them NATIONAL SIYUM MISHNAYOS distribute in the form of food packages the power to terminate life support even to the needy. when the patient's own wishes are not Braving the bitter elements of the The new monies brings the total of clear - drew the formal opposition of "Blizzard of '93'', 800 children came to­ such grants charmeled by Agudath Is­ Agudath Israel of America in testimony gether on Motzoei Shabbos, March 13. rael to Tomche Shabbos to more than this winter. for the 30th National Siyum Mishnayos $900,000 over the past nine years. Agudath Israel praised elements of the bill, developed by the New York TONS OF KOSHER FOR PESACH State Task Force on Life and the Law, FOOD SENT TO FORMER USSR but ultimately disapproved of the mea­ sure in its current form. The rtght it Activists in behalf of Soviet Jewry would grant to third parties to stop life­ were elated that 18 huge containers of preserving treatment and thereby let a Kosher l'Pesach food provisions col­ patient die, said the organization, lected by a variety of tzedoko organiza­ would be "an unWise step down an ex­ tions were able to reach Jews in cities tremely dangerous road." across the former Soviet Union in time New York State has already passed of Pirchei Agudath Israel of America, cel­ for the Yorn Tov. a health care proxy law, which allows ebrating their many individual achieve­ The massive shipment, coordinated tndividuals to pre-designate agents of ments in personal Torah learning. by Operation Open Curtain, was suc­ their own choosing to make medical de­ Rabbi Aharon Schechter. Rosh cessfully expedited as a result of the in­ cisions on their behalf in case they are HaYeshiva ofMesivta Rabbetnu Chaim tercession of Agudath Israel ofAmerica incapacitated. The current bill would Berlin and member of the Moetzes with the U.S. State Department. provide for situations in which a patient ~ Gedolei HaTorah. also braved the ice. The delivery included literally tons of has not designated an agent. snow. and sleet that had virtually shut matzos, fish, oil, grape juice, and other The bill does require surrogates to be down New York City, just to address the foodstuffs. Top level officials in the De­ bound by-and make a good faith effort youngsters. to congratulate them for partment, in keeping With government to ascertain-a patient's own wishes in­ their achievements and to encourage policy of supporting humanitarian ef­ cluding personal moral and religious them further. forts in that area of the world, agreed to beliefs, rather than their own assess­ Top honors this year at the Siyum arrange for the Defense Department to ment of the patient's "best tnterests." went to Yehoshua Zev Ulshin. Shimon cover the over $100,000 of shipping ex­ But it is fundamentally flawed, ac­ Waxman, and Refoel Herzka, all of penses when approached on the mat- cording to Agudath Israel, by the extent Lakewood, who learned 1400, 1380, ter by Agudath Israel on behalf of a con­ of the life and death decision-making and 1300 mishnayos by heart, respec­ sortium of groups working in Russia authority it grants to a surrogate-even tively. Nine-year-old Shmuel Waxman and other republics. a surrogate unappointed by the patient was cited for knoWing 900 mis/mayos -when tnformation on the patient's be­ b'al peh. Eight young men were 250 BNOS AGUDATH ISRAEL liefs cannot be ascertained. It would al­ awarded for learning the entire text of LEADERS CONVENE low such a surrogate to make a decision the Shishoh Sidrei Mishna - all 4190 that Will result in the patient's death mishnayos. even in certain circumstances when the DETROIT - Some 250 girls from The Siyum was dedicated to the patient is not in a terminal condition or Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, Milwau­ permanently unconscious. memory of the departed Gerer Rebbe, kee, New York, Providence, St. Louis, the Lev Simcha, zt"l. and Toronto gathered in Detroit for the Further, shattering precedent. it bar Hundreds of boys had come in from National Leaders Convention of Bnos would not the surrogate even from out of town for Shabbos just to be at the Agudath Israel of America. The conven­ authorizing Withdrawal of nutrition and celebration - from Baltimore, Boston, tf this tion included a full program of sessions hydration the surrogate considers Edison, Monsey, Passaic, Philadelphia, and practical workshops designed to in the "best interests" of the patient. It Providence, Scranton, and South help them improve their skills and would also allow doctors - in the ab­ Fallsburg. and had spent an entire sence of family or friends - to Withhold boost their confidence in their leader­ ruach-raising convention in Baro Park ship capabilities. or Withdraw life support tfthey determine in prelude to the event. that a patient "Will die Within a short time period despite provision of treatment." AGUDATH ISRAEL OPPOSES NY BILL $110,000 MORE OBTAINED BY 'The potential for abuse of this awe­ THAT WOULD ALLOW THIRD PARTIES AGUDAHFORTOMCHESHABBOS some decision-making authority is self­ TO WITHDRAW LIFE SUPPORT evident," says David Zwiebel, general Over $110,000 more in emergency counsel for Agudath Israel. "especially food funding for the hungry has been A proposed New York State law that where the surrogate may have some obtained by Agudath Israel of America would vastly broaden the authority of personal interest in the outcome of the family members. friends and doctors to decision." •

The Jewish Obseroer, April 1993 39 DEMONSTRATE YOUR SOLIDARITY WITH THE TORAH ACTION COALITION OF AGUDATH ISRAEL The movement that brings together the broadest spectrum of Orthodox Jewry in America for effective action addressing the needs of Kial Yisroel the world over. You encourage this unity by joining the diverse assemblage participating in the

71 SZNNUAL DINNER AGUDATH ISRAEL OF AMERIC.A i11?',l:lN:J ?~-ra» n,.1lN Sunday evening, May 16, 1993 / l"n?m ~'~ii:> I New YorltHilton

Honoring: Community Service wn;mnn.:w Awardees MORDECHAINEUSTADT JOSEPH M. GLATSTEIN, Esq. HaGaon Rav Aharon Kotler Memorial Award NOSSON HIRSCH FOR DISTINGUISHED SERVICE TO TORAH RABBI YISROEL HISIGER • JOEL F. KAPLAN, Esq. SHLOMO WERDIGER RABBI BEREL ROSENFELD Reb Elimelech Tress Memorial Award DR. MECHEL SCH!FFENBAUER FOR PRESERVATION OF THE LEGACY OF THE SHEARIS HAPLAITOH • MORDECHAI AVIGDOR, Esq. RABBI AHARON SCHWEBEL William K. Friedman Memorial Award Moreinu Yaakov Rosenheim Memorial Award FOR DISTINGUISHED SERVICE TO AGUDIST IDEALS The Hon. PETER F. VALLONE • Speaker. New York City Council Dedication of the Public Service Tribute Office of Government Affairs REUVEN KAUFMAN ln Memory of Joseph Melahn il"V Dinner Chairman

PLJEASJE MAKJE YOUR DINNER RESERVATIONS NOW A commemorative journal with greetings and advertisements will be published on this occasion. RSVP: $400 per couple or $500 in journal ads. (no appeals) If you cannot attend in person, let your journal ad speak for you. AGUDATH ISRAEL OF AMERICA/84 WILLIAM STREET, NEW YORK NY 10038 I (212) 797-9000