— Middletown, Connecticut, since 1868 —

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 VOLUME CLV, ISSUE 18 WESLEYANARGUS.COM One-Goal Shutout Carry That Weight Supports Sulkowicz By Sofi Goode Before the event, the Feminist Co- News Editor op posted a schedule on Facebook of where the mattress would be through- A group of students involved with out the day and created shifts for those the Feminist Co-op carried a mattress to carrying it. Candace Powning ’18 and various prominent campus locations on Natalie May ’18 both carried the mat- Thursday, Oct. 29 as part of the national tress from Fountain Avenue to the Help Carry That Weight campaign. Usdan University Center in the evening. The campaign, hosted at more Powning stated that she believes the than one hundred colleges across the mattress serves as a reminder to the ad- country, is an expression of support ministration of students’ concerns. for Emma Sulkowicz, a Columbia “What’s happened to [Sulkowicz] University student who is protesting at Columbia is a really important issue her university’s lack of accountability on many college campuses.” Powning in regard to punishing perpetrators of said. “...Clearly a school, Columbia, sexual assault. For the past two months, that’s very liberal, very invested in their Sulkowicz has carried her mattress with students, is not being accountable and her everywhere on campus in protest of behaving correctly in light of these is- JONAS POWELL/ASSISTANT PHOTO EDITOR her assaulter’s continued enrollment and sues. We’ve seen it here at Wesleyan as Ben Bratt ’16 protects the ball from a Conn college defender. The men will face Middlebury this presence on Columbia’s campus. well, the administration not behav- Saturday in their opening game of the NESCAC tournament. For more on this story, turn to page 11. The Help Carry That Weight ing how the student body feels they event at the University was organized should.... [The mattress is] a message by various members of the Feminist Co- to the students, but it’s also a message op, including Chloe Murtagh ’15, Alicia to the administration saying that we’re Lucifer Gets Sued in Gansley ’15, Yiyang Wang ’15, Ryden aware of where they’re fucking up and Nelson ’16, Tess Altman ’17, and Isabel where to pay more attention.” Alter ’17. According to Altman, the Feminist Altman said that Sulkowicz’s activ- Co-op had originally planned to write a Original Second Stage Play ism has become a national rallying point list of policy demands on the mattress, for those confronting how college ad- but decided against it to appeal to a By Will McGhee quite supportive of the more endear- Lucifer (Lucy for short), as ministrations handle sexual assault cases. broader audience. Staff Writer ing parts of Christianity while “Lucy” played by Xandra Ellin ’18, is more “She was sexually assaulted on that “I think there have been events sur- is fairly cynical of the state of modern of a child; she’s a self-proclaimed mattress and vowed that she would carry rounding [specific policy recommenda- While Second Stage has long been religion. “bitch,” not exactly evil, and just it around until the university expelled tions], and I think there is a time and a known as a strong supporter of student- “Lucy” is a farce that portrays wants to get drunk with her friends. her perpetrator,” Altman said. “It’s be- place for that, but I think it was more so written works, this season in particular what happens when several religions Ellin has quite a bit of fun with the come this national symbol around this to have this public display of support,” is offering an especially diverse mix of suddenly come together and take Satan role, rolling her eyes at the pros- issue in the last month or so.” Altman said. “It’s always hard because original pieces. Of the eight shows be- to trial for all her (yes, her) crimes ecution and seducing the judge in The mattress itself was intended whenever we do anything we have to ing produced this semester (including against humanity over the last few mil- equal measure. to act as both a show of support for think about who the audience is and one performance art piece), three are lennia. It is a courtroom drama of the Her shield and sword is the Sulkowicz and a reminder to the admin- new adaptations and two are entirely supernatural, but this does not unfold character Saul Goodman, taken istration of its responsibilities. MATTRESS, page 3 original plays. as one would expect. For one thing, straight from the television world of “Lucy Goes to Court” is the sec- writer/director Hazem Fahmy ’17 of- “Breaking Bad” and the upcoming ond of those plays, going up a week fers an interesting take on the Devil, “Better Call Saul,” here portrayed after “Godspell” in the same space, the and not just because he gender-bends. by Jake Lahut ’17 in place of Bob WestCo Café. The two make for inter- “I think about the Devil a lot,” esting companion pieces: “Godspell” is Fahmy said. PLAY, page 6 Ultimate Goals: Frisbee Promotes Collaborative Spirit By Sadie Renjilian est addition to the Wesleyan Ultimate Though the teams’ gender iden- Staff Writer Frisbee scene. tifications are the most obvious dis- Vicious Circles participated in a tinctions between them, they also take If you wear glasses but put in con- tournament at Brown this last weekend, different approaches to the game of tacts to play sports, have FOMO, or just which was the first of the year for the Ultimate itself. don’t fit in, you should play Ultimate, team. It will compete in a second tourna- “The two single-gender teams according to the recruiting signs for ment later this fall, its last for the semester. came first, and Throw Culture was Wesleyan Ultimate Frisbee. “Fall is our off-season,” Gibbel said. formed in that space of the people Ultimate Frisbee is having a par- Sandweiss-Back agreed that fall is a who wanted a less formal, less com- ticularly intense moment on campus, time for rebuilding rather than compet- petitive, more fuck-around-when- according to Noam Sandweiss-Back ’15. ing, especially since Nietzsche Factor re- you-feel-like-it kind of frisbee team, Sandweiss-Back is one of the team’s cap- cently lost several members. The captains and I think that divide still persists tains, along with Isaac Pollan ’15 and have been working to create a new team to some extent,” Owen-Dunow said. Peter Sohmer ’16. All of them are part dynamic this fall. Sandweiss-Back pointed “Throw has always been a sort of chill- of Wesleyan’s all-male Ultimate Frisbee out that the practice schedule is just as gru- er option.” team, which is called Nietzsche Factor. eling in the fall as it is in the spring, despite Throw Culture may be known Nietzsche Factor is one of three Ultimate the fact that the team only competes in for its welcoming and relaxed spirit, Frisbee teams on campus. The other two tournaments in the spring. For Nietzsche but the team makes competition a are Vicious Circles, which is all-female Factor, developing a strong team dynamic priority. A tournament with co-ed and captained by Katherine Gibbel ’15 is just as important as the competitive ele- teams from other schools was sup- and Lucy Salwen ’17, and Throw Culture, ment of Ultimate. posed to take place at Wesleyan last which is co-ed and led by Max Owen- Several players spoke about the weekend, but the plans fell apart at the Dunow ’15, Jesse Lieman-Sifry ’15, Emily differences between Wesleyan’s three last minute. As a result, the team will Schwed ’15, and Tavo True-Alcala ’15. Ultimate Frisbee teams. participate in only three tournaments Throw Culture will be playing in “I’d say it’s mostly gender identifica- this fall. a tournament this weekend at Green tion,” Gibbel said. “There are other differ- The relationship between the Mountain College. This team, perhaps ences, but the basic is that Throw is co-ed three Ultimate teams has a fraught NOAH MERTZ/PHOTO EDITOR best-known for its members’ love of jean and Vicious is all women. And Vicious has Students shared the weight of a mattress on Wednesday in support of shorts and Pabst Blue Ribbon, is the new- drills.” FRISBEE, page 4 Columbia University student Emma Sulkowicz, who is protesting her administration’s lack of accountability in cases of sexual assault. Lena’s Lessons Shrill Isolation Master of Disguise A review of “Not That Kind of Girl” 4 Ringing From Within 7 Method acting for life 9 2 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014

The Wesleyan Argus WESPEAKS established in 1868 Why We Stand With Israel

Editors-in-Chief By Wesleyan United With Israel supports a country that gives its Gazan people by repairing the power and offer better work conditions Gwendolyn Rosen Rebecca Seidel citizens, regardless of their race, lines that Hamas destroyed with their than most businesses in the West Wesleyan is a campus that religion, sexual orientation, or rocket fire into densely populated Bank. Boycotting does not pres- Production Manager prides itself on its openness. Yet gender identity equal rights and Israeli civilian areas. So when we say sure bureaucrats on either side to Eliza Loomis when Israel comes into the conversa- protections before the law. Israel that we are pro-Israel, we are saying create peace. We must instead urge tion, any dialogue that supports the is home to the only gay pride fes- that we support a country that goes to the United Nations and the United Executive Editors country is prematurely dismissed. tival in the Middle East. Israel is unprecedented lengths to minimize States’ Government to encour- Lily Baggott Here, being pro-Israel is ostracizing. the only country that has had a civilian casualties. The Israeli Defense age the Palestinian Authority to sit Claire Bradach Any pro-Israel sentiment is painted woman Prime Minister, a wom- Force, like any other military, is not down in direct negotiations with the Miranda Katz as a disregard for Palestinian life, an speaker of the Parliament perfect. They have made mistakes Israeli Government. Only through News Editors Millie Dent which could not be farther from the (Knesset), and a woman Chief in military operations, but we don’t direct negotiations can a sustainable Sofi Goode truth. The humanitarian tendencies Justice of the Supreme Court in believe that these mistakes warrant peace be created on the principle of Asst. News Editors Courtney Laermer of Wesleyan students blind many to the Middle East. Israeli Arabs, putting Israel under disproportionate two states for two peoples. Sophie Zinser the real facts of the situation. So let of Muslim, Christian, and Druze scrutiny, nor do they warrant con- Time and again, Israelis have Features Editors Rebecca Brill us set the record straight. faiths, serve in prominent roles in demning the entire nation. willingly traded land for peace. Jess Zalph Like the majority of students Israeli society and its Government, In 2005 when Israel forcibly re- Today, the peoples of Egypt, Jordan, Arts Editors Dan Fuchs on campus, and the official policy including Supreme Court justices, moved its own citizens from Gaza to and Israel live in peace as a result Gabe Rosenberg of the Government of the State ambassadors, generals, and mem- give up this land for peace, Hamas of face-to-face negotiations between Asst. Arts Editors Michael Darer of Israel led by Prime Minister bers of the Knesset. Israel boasts built rockets and tunnels from those their governments. Wesleyan United William Donnelly Netanyahu, we support a two state the freest press in the Middle East. territories to terrorize Israelis. While with Israel fervently hopes to see Sports Editors Felipe DaCosta solution. We hope to see two auton- Whatever problems one may we do not support the expansion the Palestinian and Israeli peoples Brett Keating omous, fully functional states coex- have with the Israeli government, of settlements, make no mistake; enjoying a similar era of peace and Asst. Sports Editor Gili Lipman ist peacefully for the sake of both delegitimizing or ignoring these settlements are not the cause of vio- cooperation. Food Editors Emma Davis Palestinians and Israelis. We recog- contributions is wrong. How can lent opposition to Israel’s existence. Wesleyan United With Israel Erica DeMichiel nize the struggle of the refugee, and critics say that Israel is fundamen- Withdrawal from settlements will defines itself as an organization Opinion Editor Jenny Davis hope for a resolution. We value the tally against human rights when not lead to peace on its own. Hamas which supports Israel, opposes di- Photo Editor Noah Mertz innovative resources that Israel pro- presented with these facts? Israel proved this. But peace can lead to the vestment, and wants peace. We are Asst. Photo Editors Jonas Powell vides the international community, values life above all, demonstrated withdrawal of settlements. The Camp not a right wing organization, and Lex Spirtes which include agricultural, techno- by their consistent efforts to be David Accords proved this. we support the right of Palestinians Head Layout Courtney Laermer Layout Redwan Bhuiyan logical, and medical breakthroughs. among the first to send medical We do not believe boycotting to a state of their own, living side Jordan Friedland But most importantly, we acknowl- teams to help disaster zones world- Israeli products is an effective strategy by side, in peace with the State of Molly Schiff edge that Israel is a beacon of de- wide. Israel’s regard for life is also for pursuing peace: nor does President Israel. We want a Wesleyan com- Matthew Wallock mocracy, and has historically been prevalent in a military context. Obama, nor does the J Street national munity that can have an open, un- Business Manager Andrew Hove the United States’ primary ally in Over the summer, in the midst of organization, nor does Palestinian biased, and fair conversation about Advertising Manager Katya Sapozhnina the Middle East. This is an alliance the war, Israel delivered food and President, Mahmoud Abbas. The Israel. Web Editor Cumhur Korkut built on shared values and strategic medical supplies to the citizens Boycott harms both Israelis and Feel free to contact us at Social Media Editor Heather Whittemore interests. in Gaza. Even more telling was Palestinians. Many Israeli businesses [email protected] with any Distribution Managers Gabriela Arias Wesleyan United with Israel Israel’s determination to help the employ both Israelis and Palestinians, questions or interest. Sydney Lolli Ampersand Editor Sarah Esocoff Head Copy Editor Elana Rosenthal Copy Editors William Donnelly FGSS 2014 FALL SYMPOSIUM Michelle Farias Isak McCune Noam Radcliffe Ali Rosenberg

The Wesleyan Argus is published by the undergradu- ates of Wesleyan University. The University does not pub- lish The Argus or influence its content, nor is it responsible for any of the opinions ex- pressed in The Argus. The Argus is published twice weekly during the school year except in exam periods or recesses. The Argus welcomes Wespeaks that pertain to cam- pus issues, news stories, and editorial policy. The dead- line for submission is 4 p.m. (Monday, for Tuesday publica- tion, and Thursday, for Friday publication). All Wespeaks should be submitted through the Argus website and should include the author’s name and ACTIVISM IN telephone number. The Argus reserves the right to edit all submissions for length as well as withhold Wespeaks that are excessively QUEER TIMES vulgar or nonsensical. The Argus will not edit Wespeaks for spelling or grammar. Due to the volume of mail received, REINA GOSSETT neither publication nor return of submissions are guaranteed. Sylvia Rivera Law Project Editorial offices are located at 45 Broad Street, . Middletown. Email: argus@ AMBER HOLLIBAUGH wesleyan.edu Co-Founder, Queers for Economic Justice

visit us online at FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 wesleyanargus.com USDAN 108 | 3:30 P.M. RECEPTION IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING Find an Error? Contact us at [email protected] Sponsored by the Feminist, Gender, and Sexuality Studies Program FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS 3 news History Professor Gives “Understanding ISIS” Lecture By Molly Schiff According to Masters, the send enough troops to Iraq. The which we could not have done.” Additionally, the removal of Staff Writer events and effects of the Soviet in- effect of that was that Iraq began a The most recent major contrib- the international media from Syria vasion of Afghanistan marked, in civil war.” uting factor, the Syrian Civil War, caused by the threat of capture has John E. Andrus Professor of many ways, the beginning of the Sectarian conflict occurred began in 2012 and still persists to- limited the release of status reports, History Bruce Masters presented setting of the stage for Da’ash’s de- between the Shia majority and day. Many Sunni militant groups which is something the Syrian gov- the historical events leading up velopment. One of its major last- Sunni minority following the fall that had been based in Iraq capital- ernment may have wanted, accord- to the development of the Islamic ing effects is the concept of jihadi of Saddam Hussein’s Sunni regime ized on the opportunity to move ing to Masters. State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) in a tourism. Young, wealthy men from and subsequent election of a Shia- to and operate out of Syria, where To conclude, Masters gave a History Matters lecture on Tuesday, Persian Gulf countries, including dominated government. funds were raised for individual brief overview of the geopolitics Oct. 28. The lecture, entitled Saudi Arabia, Qatar, the United “We, in [the Sunni’s] view, Jihadi groups. In time, many decid- of the current situation, namely “Understanding ISIS,” focused on Arab Emirates, and Kuwait, would turned Iraq over to the Shia,” ed to join the one group that seemed how Iran will serve to benefit from the ways in which key events in the travel to Afghanistan, fight for a few Masters said. “We made Iraq a Shia to be the most influential: Da’ash. keeping Iraq under Shia control Middle East over the last three de- months against the Soviets, and then country.” In order to attract followers, and Turkey’s support for an Islamic cades contributed to the rise of the return to their home countries and In doing so, Shia leaders were Da’ash claims to represent the only (Sunni) democracy in countries un- extremist group in Iraq. Masters live out the rest of their lives. One brought back from exile in Iran, true Islamic state and to practice dergoing internal conflict, such as focused on three events in particu- major exception to this definition is which served to benefit Iran’s posi- the purest form of Islam. The group Syria and Egypt. lar: the 1979 Soviet intervention in Osama bin Laden, originally from tion in the region. Sunni opposition hopes to capitalize on the anger and Christina Sickinger ’18, who Afghanistan, the 2003 United States Saudi Arabia. took up arms, training guerilla fight- persecution felt by Sunni Iraqis dur- attended the talk, spoke about how invasion of Iraq, and the 2012 out- Parallel situations of jihadi ers, or mujahideen, to resist U.S. in- ing the years of Shia rule. she appreciated the depth Masters break of Civil War in Syria. tourism were seen in Bosnia in the tervention and the Shia government Masters emphasized that the went into about ISIS. ISIS is an English acronym for 1990s and are now evident in the that they facilitated. claiming of the caliphate lends “It definitely informed me,” the group currently aiming to estab- recruitment of Da’ash members With the 2013 withdrawal of Da’ash significant credibility for Sickinger said. “Beforehand, I was lish a Sunni Islamic state, or caliph- throughout the region. troops from Iraq, many have blamed Sunnis. really interested in ISIS, but really ate, in the region extending across According to Masters, the President Barack Obama for the “This is why, in some ways didn’t know a lot about it, so I was Iraq and Syria. In Arabic, the group United States’ involvement in Iraq further sectarian conflict that has [Da’ash] is a very tough nut to really glad I went.” is referred to by the acronym Da’ash. beginning in 2003 created a politi- developed. Masters, however, offers crack,” Masters said. “They have de- Another attendee of the event, Masters used the term Da’ash when cal vacuum on which Da’ash capital- a different explanation of the situ- clared themselves to be the Islamic Talia Kaplan ’18, said the talk helped he referred to them rather than ISIS ized. According to experts, the U.S. ation. state, which means the exclusion of her understand how past events have or ISIL, another acronym used al- presence in Iraq could have been ef- “[Obama’s] been blamed for all others. They are the only authen- led to the current conflict with ISIS most exclusively by the United fective with half a million soldiers, that, but I don’t think it’s fair to tic Islamic state.” in Syria and Iraq. States and European governments. yet fewer were deployed. blame him entirely,” Masters said. Masters also discussed a con- “The history that Professor Masters also emphasized Masters spoke to the conse- “On one hand, he wanted to get spiracy theory that has developed Masters provided helped me con- the United States’ role in Middle quences of the small deployment of out of Iraq, but on the other hand, regarding Da’ash’s success so far in textualize the current issue,” Kaplan Eastern political, economic, and U.S. soldiers. he didn’t have a choice because the Syria: that the Syrian government said. military affairs. “What I will say is that we elected president [of Iraq] would not supported the rise of Da’ash. Masters finished the talk by “The one thing that most peo- botched it really badly,” Masters sign a treaty to keep the Americans “If you think about it, the stating that ISIS must not continue ple can agree on is that the United said. “We did not send enough in Iraq. I don’t know what he could Syrian government never moved unabated. States created ISIS,” Masters said at troops into the country. The U.S. have done, except for fighting a against them until the last three “My ending to you is that some- the start of his lecture. took the conscious decision not to war with the al-Maliki government, months,” Masters said. thing must be done,” Masters said. University Alum Gives Firsthand Mattress: Feminist Account of the Fall of Berlin Wall Activism Targets By Millie Dent Lawrence Ma ’16, who attended the was about her meandering career path. News Editor event, spoke about why Pailthorp’s talk “I went to the talk because I re- resonated with him. ally have no idea what I’m doing with Accountability Bellamy Pailthorp ’89 gave a talk “The way Bellamy brought up the my life after this year and it’s always at the Russell House on Wednesday, Tiananmen Square massacre that hap- really comforting to hear a story of a Continued from front page May also spoke to how atten- Oct. 29 titled “The Fall of the Wall­—An pened in the same year really put into fellow Wesleyan student who found tion-calling a protest involving a Eyewitness Perspective” as part of a series perspective the fear that protestors in her life calling after graduation,” what are we saying. I think that large, unavoidable object is. of lectures hosted by the German Studies Germany experienced and what the stakes Heitkamp wrote in an email to The often it’s hard because it’s differ- “[At] Wesleyan, because we Department. were for them,” Ma wrote in an email to Argus. “Things came together so bril- ent. Often you’re not just send- feel like we’re such a liberal com- The German Studies Department The Argus. “And for a person who has liantly for her. I mean the fact that she ing messages to the students, munity, and we are, it’s important received a grant from the German only been exposed to the history of the turned her Fulbright into a career in you’re not just sending messages to have initiatives of all different Embassy in Washington, D.C., designed Berlin Wall in class, it’s easy to distance journalism just by exploring Berlin— to the administration, you’re types that might be more jarring, to facilitate the commemoration of the myself and not realize the incredible emo- East and West—right before the Wall sending it to multiple people.” more provocative,” May said. 25th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin tional resolve the protestors possessed.” came down was so perfect.” Altman elaborated further Altman asserted that having Wall. Part of this grant is going toward this Bork-Goldfield also hopes that the Bork-Goldfield hopes the talk on the message the mattress the mattress occupy common spac- lecture series. talk will help students realize that there will encourage students to become was intended to portray to the es made it more representative of Pailthorp, a news reporter at an NPR are numerous career possibilities with a involved in today’s current events be- University administration. student voices. affiliate (KPLU), was a University gradu- degree in German Studies. cause the amount of public awareness “It was saying ‘Look, peo- “You can’t deny a big mattress ate who received a Fulbright scholarship “Sometimes people ask me why any- of and presence in Berlin helped enor- ple still care,’ because I feel like taking up so much room in a space to study in Berlin after graduation. After one would want to study German Studies, mously in tearing down the Wall. at Wesleyan you have to reaf- like that,” Altman said. “It’s really arriving in Berlin, she worked as a trans- but it’s a broad field and a Fulbright “We have an election coming firm that you still care every few important to think of Usdan and lator for an American journalist, Chris [scholar] really was able to explore a up here in the United States, and I’m weeks; otherwise, it drops by the some of those really main spaces Hedges. She was working for Hedges the new country and happened to be there surprised at how many of my students wayside with all the other causes on campus as our spaces and spac- day the Wall came down and remembers at a time when it was extremely exciting tell me that they are not interested in at Wesleyan that people are fight- es that students occupy.... I think the event vividly. to be there,” Bork-Goldfield said. “So politics, and some of them even say ing for,” Altman said. “I think that bringing activism to those “The streets were crowded for days, I hope they see that one doesn’t always they won’t go and vote, and it makes it’s less saying, ‘We need to hold places is a way of reasserting our- and after a certain point you could not know where your life will end up and you me sad that they feel it is not impor- [the adminstration] accountable selves and saying this is our school buy any more bananas,” Pailthorp said. should be open.” tant,” Bork-Goldfield said. “I hope in these ways,’ and more saying, and these are things that we care “They sold out very quickly. People were Pailthorp discussed how she, as a events like that will show them that ‘We are holding you account- about at our school, right here. It’s lining up at the banks to get their greeting German Studies major, had no idea what it is important to be involved. The able. We still care and we’re still becoming so much larger.... That’s money and just a big massive party for sev- she wanted to do after she graduated. She wall would not have come down if going to. It’s not going to end how I thought about what hap- eral days in the streets. I found it a little bit applied for a Fulbright Scholarship based people in East Germany hadn’t been when a certain class graduates; pened today: saying we’re a part scary. I’ve never been a person who loves on Professor of German Studies Krishna engaged.” you’re going to keep being held of this national discussion. Yes, it’s big crowds. I found the atmosphere a bit Winston’s recommendation. Pailthorp Pailthorp agreed, saying that if accountable. You can’t wait it out an issue at Wesleyan; it’s an issue threatening.” ended up living in Germany for eight people could work up the courage to because we’re right here; we’re in in so many other places, and we’re Adjunct Associate Professor of years working as a reporter before re- vote under a communist system, those Usdan with a mattress.’” engaged in that.” German Iris Bork-Goldfield described turning to the United States for graduate in the United States should be able to what she hopes Pailthorp’s talk will ac- school. keep themselves informed and vote. complish. “Just to have faith that if you’re do- “Remember that there are people “[The fall of the Berlin Wall] is really ing something that you enjoy, that it’ll all over the world who don’t have a life a historical event of major consequence work out for you, and that if you can as easy as ours, as hard as it might seem not only to Germany, but also to the find something you’re doing not just for sometimes,” Pailthorp said. RECYCLE THIS world, and I also hope for [students] to, the money but because you genuinely get The series will conclude on besides the historical implication and also some pleasure out of it or inspiration, that Thursday, Nov. 6 with a lecture by the importance in politics, also see how eventually you’ll find your path within Krishna Winston, who will read ARGUS! important it is to get involved and also to that,” Pailthorp said. from “Too Far Afield” Günter Grass. see with [Pailthorp] that you never know Another student who attended the Winston translated the novel about where life will lead you,” Bork-Goldfield event, Jacqueline Heitkamp ’15, said she the reunification of Germany from said. felt inspired by how up front Pailthorp German to English. 4 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 features BOOK REVIEW: NOT THAT KIND OF GIRL

By Michael Darer within this new book about how its minutes of the show. “Who Moved story. It’s a sharp and poignant open- Lena Dunham’s unique voice and tex- Assistant Arts Editor subjects are supposed to interact, and My Uterus?” is an exceptionally funny ing that creates conversation between ture before luckily pulling itself out of whether there actually should be any and surprisingly tender meditation by modes of memory. the muck with a punchier follow-up. The inside cover of “Not That internal logic between the stories that Dunham on her reproductive system “Not That Kind of Girl” is not Dunham is a captivating and Kind of Girl,” the new collection of the author wants to tell. In a lesser col- and the alternating frustration and without fault, however. At times its fearless writer, even in the few mo- essays by Lena Dunham, the creator lection, this might prove to be a fatal comfort it has brought her (complete humor feels too conversational to re- ments when she seems to be a disorga- and star of HBO’s “Girls,” is filled flaw. Dunham, however, seems to have with a giggle-inducing diagram that ally enliven some of the prose, which nized or unpolished one. In “Not That with Rorschach inkblots, each com- become rather adept at navigating this labels the fallopian tubes as “Leave Me can be unremarkable and plain, albeit Kind of Girl,” she paints a picture of posed of a number of brightly colored sort of thematic conflict. The result Alone” Mountain and “Actually, Pay readable. There are moments in which the multitude of swarming selves re- totems: martini glasses, ukuleles, ba- may not always be perfect, but for the Attention To Me” Hilltop). Dunham seems to lose the self-aware- sponsible for growth and maturity, nana splits, and polka-dotted Band- most part, “Not That Kind of Girl” These longer essays are broken ness that saves some of the wilder es- balancing the anxiety, trauma, and hu- aids. The clusters of shapes bloom comfortably and fluidly divines mean- up by shorter comedic lists that help says (at one point she refers to a short mor of failure and success gracefully outward toward one another, never ing from its wealth of narrative. Dunham flex her neurotic humor story she wrote when she was twelve with one another. By the end of the quite touching, but always suggest- “Not That Kind of Girl” is di- muscles. These include an exhaustive as Carver-esque, but details its plot book, Dunham succeeds at imparting ing that they might. As a symbol of vided into five sections of essays: Love bag-content inventory and a wonder- with a little too much specificity and a sort of comfort and awareness to her the book they enclose, these shifting & Sex, Body, Friendship, Work, and fully footnoted email sent to a Philip admiration for the plaudit to seem readers, even if the materials of these arrangements of everyday comforts The Big Picture. Though the book Roth/Charles Bukowski wannabe who ironic). Her references to “Girls” of- feelings seem hard to locate. Perhaps are both shamelessly on the nose does not demand to be read all the demanded that Dunham read his mi- ten fall flat, and the more recent the it’s the book’s shameless tendency to and playfully evasive. Certainly, they way through, there’s a distinct tonal sogynistic short story about a hookup anecdote, the less interest Dunham hold the uncomfortable under bright promise the expected mash-up of the uniformity to the writing that seems with a J.Crew saleswoman while still displays in really digging through it. lights. Perhaps it’s the author’s unwill- serious, the mundane, and the twee. to suggest a united whole. It’s also a refusing to acknowledge her existence Her references to her current relation- ingness to settle for simple answers, At the same time, the level of tendency that can become frustrat- for an extended period of time. Other ship with Jack Antonoff (of Bleachers even when she seems tempted to dig mystery that these symbols gesture ing over long stretches, as conflicts highlights include Dunham’s pieces and fun. fame) also fall flat, due to for them. Or perhaps it’s that, despite toward is something that Dunham’s of various severities unavoidably read “Emails I Would Send If I Were One a strange over-romanticization of it. any plan or promise to the contrary, book never quite achieves and perhaps similarly. While certain moments do Ounce Crazier/Angrier/Braver” and “I Even stranger is Dunham’s refusal to Dunham has, like it or not, learned isn’t interested in achieving. The col- stand out because of Dunham’s fear- Didn’t Fuck Them, but They Yelled at call him by his name (which becomes something worth sharing. lection’s subtitle is, after all, “A young less honesty, others seem to get lost Me,” which together form a spectacu- more frustrating when a mention of woman tells you what she’s ‘learned.’” in the myriad frustrations that she’s lar one-two punch at sexist dynamics “him” is accompanied by a doodle of a That said, Dunham never seems quite intent on discussing. No topic ever in the workplace. key ring labeled “Jack”). sure of what those quotation marks seems superfluous, but some do not Of all the collection’s essays, Furthermore, at times, despite actually stand for. Is “Not That Kind quite seem to fit into the book. though, “Barry” may be the collec- her titular promise, Dunham stretch- of Girl” interested in the failings of That being said, no one section tion’s strongest. Through a series of es too hard to end the essays with a the memoir as an educational tool, or ever seems wholly underdeveloped, meditations on Dunham’s history distinct lesson. While many of the are the quotes simply a cheeky stylistic each speckled with bits of insight and with the idea of sexual assault, the themes work extremely well, there are flourish meant to undercut the self- humor. In “Take My Virginity (No, piece discusses her rape at the hands moments when Dunham’s summary seriousness of the autobiography? Really, Take It),” Dunham explores of an Oberlin super-senior, who took of them comes across as didactic, tact- This question ends up being one her early views of her own sexuality, advantage of her one night after a less, and preachy, despite her attempts of the central tensions of Dunham’s and the use of virginity as a check- party. It’s a tour de force in emotional to preface these paragraphs with some collection, if it isn’t already the central point for maturity. “Platonic Bed and situational detail, and it paints a sort of self-aware teasing. Essays tension of her work overall. “Girls,” Sharing: A Great Idea (for People searing picture of recovery from sexual such as “Falling in Love,” in which which over its past three seasons has Who Hate Themselves)” identifies violence. It’s also a masterful meta- Dunham recounts her relationships proven to be both mercilessly funny Dunham’s early need for nonsexual textual evaluation of how writers and with each of the men to whom she’s and breathtakingly cogent, often finds attention as a destructive mechanism memoirists discuss sex in their work, said “I love you” before hastily pull- itself settling into a purposely uneasy of self-loathing. “Sex Scenes, Nude and how individuals write and rewrite ing a quick lesson from the memory middle ground on the topic, positing Scenes, and Publicly Sharing Your their own stories in order to accom- of each encounter, are especially guilty lessons learned through failure by ev- Body” gives Dunham a chance to modate their personal ideas of what of this. It’s at these points that the eryone but those who actually need enter the conversation about “Girls” their lives and relationships should prose seems laziest and the humor the them. Similarly, there seems to be a that still seems to galvanize people look like. “I’m an unreliable narrator,” least enticing. In fact, at these points decent amount of internal confusion who refuse to watch more than fifteen Dunham begins, before telling her the book seems all but certain to lose C/O NPR.ORG Celtic Cavern Brims with Frisbee: Ultimate Classic and Modern Charm Teamwork Prevails

By Taylor Leet-Otley staples such as Eli Cannon’s, the First website as the owner’s secret recipe. Continued from front page ence with competitive sports, especial- Staff Writer and Last Tavern, and La Boca. “A lot of people love the lobster ly soccer and basketball. Despite the While the moniker and Gaelic bisque here, but I think right now history. For a long time, the three players’ diverse levels of background “Call it, buddy. Heads or tails.” typeface on the sign may evoke the the chowder is better,” one bartender teams felt competitive toward one with the sport, all are willing to com- When walking into Celtic vaguest image of an old country- noted. another. However, members of all mit to the intense team schedule. Cavern during its 3-to-7 p.m. happy themed mead hall, the Cavern is in The menu includes a couple of three teams were quick to point out When Gibbel played Ultimate hour, patrons may be greeted by the fact a pleasantly appointed and mod- explicitly Irish dishes, including a that the groups are getting along Frisbee for the first time during her bartender with this cryptic proposi- ern-looking Irish pub. It possesses the shepherd’s pie and Celtic bangers and very well this year, in large part due first year at Wesleyan, one aspect of the tion. Call the toss correctly, and the usual accoutrements: a row of six TVs mash, described as a blend of Irish to the friendship between Gibbel, game that she found especially engag- drink is free. Call it incorrectly, and above the bar tuned in an alternating sausage and mashed potatoes with Owen-Dunow, and Sandweiss- ing was the pervasive notion of “Spirit you’ll receive at worst a sympathetic pattern to ESPN 1 and 2, a felt-green gravy. Also included are more contem- Back. of the Game.” The philosophy, which grin and at best an offer to try again billiards table nestled into the corner, porary New England staples like the For all three teams, the has been a crucial aspect of Ultimate on the next glass. and a large chalkboard listing the 18 aforementioned clam chowder. Ultimate community is what keeps since its invention in the late 1960s, “That one’s on me,” said Chris, beers and ciders on tap on any given Beyond that, the menu includes them around. Frisbee players at invokes the honor system. Players call who wished to be referred to in night. tweaked versions of classic bar staples Wesleyan feel a strong sense of kin- their own fouls; there is no referee. The Argus as “Chris the Attractive Beyond meeting these neighbor- like wings, here made of pork shanks ship both with the members of the “For me, ‘Spirit of the Game’ is Wednesday-Night Bartender.” hood bar standards, the Celtic Cavern and tossed in buffalo sauce, and three University teams and with about a sort of camaraderie, not just Chris has been a bartender at the has a distinct personality. The coun- Reuben sandwiches made with Mahi the larger collegiate Ultimate com- with your own team but with other Cavern since it opened in March. tertop is lined with several CDs drawn steak in place of the traditional pas- munity. Gibbel attributes this to teams, and a sense of respect, a sense of “I’m the last man standing, actu- from almost every existing genre of trami (although pastrami is available Ultimate’s tendency to attract a cer- character and integrity, that you want ally, who’s been here since the open- the 1990s, with artists like Limp as well). tain type of person. to bring to the field,” Gibbel said. ing,” he said, pocketing the coin and Bizkit and Nirvana featured promi- The bar seems suited for a casual “People who [play Ultimate] “People are competitive, obviously; reaching for the tap. nently. Although the bartender knows night on Main Street with friends. For are really interested in sports and people want to excel and do well, but Where did Chris develop the the precise number of CDs, it will not older students who still have fuzzy being competitive and athletic, but at the end of the day it’s about having coin toss happy hour? be disclosed here; those who manage memories of bar nights at Titanium, also a lot calmer and friendlier than fun and making sure it’s a great time “I had a friend who owned a bar to guess within 15 CDs of the actual the question remains as to whether [those who play] other sports I’ve for everyone.” a few years back and he did that,” he count will receive a free drink. Celtic Cavern is equipped to meet the done in the past,” Gibbel said. Owen-Dunow agreed that a said. “I picked it up from him.” Overall, the atmosphere is ca- needs of a Wesleyan bar night, espe- The teams attract players with peaceful approach to the game is part The bar is located at the bottom sual and friendly. Patrons range from cially in light of the gaping hole left varying levels of Ultimate Frisbee ex- of Ultimate’s appeal . of a glass-hemmed staircase, around college-aged to likely retired, and they in students’ schedules with the recent perience. Many members of Throw “What separates Ultimate from the back of the 386 Main St. build- chat readily down the bar, shooting demise of The Nest, which hosted the Culture did not play Ultimate be- a lot of other sports I’ve played, espe- ing that also houses the New England the breeze about the highlights of the iconic Wednesday bar nights of years fore joining. In contrast, Nietzsche cially in high school, is that even at a Emporium and Froyo World. beer selection or the game on TV. past. Factor’s new roster consists entirely competitive level of play there’s really a Founded as a collaboration be- Despite the low-key atmosphere, “I remember being out and about of people who have played before. focus on having fun,” he said. “In col- tween Bob Jeffrey and Scott Brown, a the Cavern boasts a small but well- when the Wesleyan crowd would come Vicious Circles tends to attract a legiate Frisbee, it’s not uncommon to longtime restaurant owner and a build- designed menu of upscale bar food. through with a vengeance for about mix of the two, but whether or not mingle with the teams on the sidelines, ing contractor, respectively, the pub Supposedly the biggest draw therein is 45 minutes and then they were gone, they have played Ultimate before, and everyone is applauding great per- has found a niche among Middletown the lobster bisque, noted on the bar’s and that was the night,” Chris said. most of the members have experi- formances on the other team.” FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS features • 5 WesCeleb: JACOB MUSINSKY

By Lily Baggott A: When was that? A: Are you a pro? a drummer. Surprise!” And I was like, and I ran all the meetings. Honestly, it Executive Editor JM: It was sophomore fall. So that JM: No. Now I can do the Monday, “Great, okay. I’m very happy.” And so I was a really cool year to do that job be- was the first dance I did. And then I maybe I’ll get Tuesday done, and started playing drums in my house and cause we did so many really cool things. As I tried to find a seat among the choreographed in the spring with Sky Wednesday is where I get a little they were like, “Okay, let’s get you les- We had the USLAC resolution, we did sea of clocks scattered about the living McGilligan [’14]. And that was a bar lost. I can do maybe fifty percent of sons.” So I took lessons and then I was the Wes, Divest! resolution, we had the room of his house, Jacob Musinsky mitzvah-themed dance. Wednesday, if I’m lucky. good, and the guy told my parents, “If coeducation resolution—I’m missing a ’15 began to tell me about what he he continues like this, he’ll be famous lot of important things…. So we did a describes as his “multifaceted” life. A: What does that mean? A: Is Sunday the hardest? by the time he’s 16.” And then I was lot of really cool things. It was a really At first he could barely break away JM: It was so great. We danced to… JM: Saturday’s the hardest. Thursday is like, “Wow!” and then I quit. Like, im- important year for my Wesleyan career from his Tuesday crossword puzzle, “Yeah” by Usher, “My Humps,” harder, and then Friday is really, really mediately. Because I couldn’t commit. but it was not always fun. but once we started talking about “Beautiful” by James Blunt. Do you hard. Saturday is, like, impossible, and Terp, he was unstoppable. A for- know, “You’re beautiful—” then Sunday is different. It’s also hard, A: Does success scare you? A: Anything else that’s cool about you? mer would-be celebrity drummer, he but they’re bigger puzzles, so they’re JM: I don’t know. I think what intimi- JM: I’m trying to think. What else do I spilled the details about his theatrical A: Yeah. just a little different. dates me is—putting my creativity on do? I know that I do a lot of things. Oh, past, the upcoming Terp dance, and JM: “Everytime We Touch” by Cascada, the spot is really hard for me. But I’ve I’m on Spring Fling committee. Halloweekend costumes. By the way, “Hollaback Girl” by Gwen Stefani. A: This is The New York Times, right? learned to overcome that with Terp. does anyone have a soul patch that he And we had the girls wear dresses with JM: Yes. So that’s how I picked it up. Terp is the best. It’s been a formative A: Who are we going to have for Spring can borrow? T-shirts over them with spray paint on But they’re so cool because you learn experience for me.... Oh, I know what Fling? them. Did you go to bar mitzvahs ever? how to do crosswords. Like, when you I really want to talk about. I want to JM: The Baha Men. The Argus (A): Why do you think first look at one, you have no fucking mention “Shrak” because it was the you’re a WesCeleb? A: Oh yeah. clue what you’re doing, but then you best thing ever. A: What are you going to be for Jacob Musinsky (JM): I don’t know. I JM: Okay, yeah. So you know how learn the tricks of how to do crosswords Halloween? feel like I really put myself everywhere you come in your formalwear and they and then you become better at them, A: What’s “Shrak”? JM: Jules [Lighter ’16] is going to be around campus, force my way into ev- give out T-shirts that have your name and it’s fun. It makes me feel like I’m JM: “Shrak” was a musical that we did Cruella de Vil and she’s trying to get as erything. spray painted across them? So we had smart and keeping my brain in shape last spring that I was in. And I feel like many sexy dalmatians as possible, so I people wear that, and people had light- because I’m, like, in college. I do other I could be a WesCeleb because of this might be one of them. And then I’m A: Like what? up things on their hands. And the boys, things, though. I’m multifaceted. musical because it was the best musical going to be sexy Ash Ketchum...be- JM: I’m a science major, so that’s one we all greased our hair up awkwardly that was ever put on at Wesleyan. cause I have a denim vest and his shirt thing. And that’s a serious way to meet and then wore button downs with ties A: What else? kind of looks like it has denim in it, and people here because I feel like there are and khakis, and it was so funny. And we JM: I’m in steel band. A: I’m so sad I missed it. I have his hat. And then my last one is so many people here that don’t know did slow dancing and there was a grind JM: It’s online; it’s on YouTube. sexy Guy Fieri because he’s my inspira- any science majors. And so that’s a line, and just, like, weird crap. Oh, and A: Tell me about that. tion. So those are my three costumes. way that I’ve met a larger group of “Cotton-Eyed Joe.” JM: WesleyPan, as we call it, is a class, A: What did you play? I’m really excited about it, especially people that I might not meet based on actually, but it’s a class that I’ve now JM: So it was written by six of my Guy Fieri. I might just do that for all my extracurriculars. A: So you’re choreographing a Terp taken twice and I TA-ed it last semester, friends that graduated last year. It was three nights. dance this semester? so I’ve been involved in it for the past Sky [McGilligan ’14], Liza [Pine ’14], A: You major in all science? JM: I am. I don’t want to give too much three semesters. We basically play a mix Nick [Petrillo ’14], Ben [Kafoglis ’14], A: I have one more question. JM: Yeah. Well, I’m a molecular biol- away to your readers. This year we’re of classical Trinidadian music and pop Charlie [Kaplan ’14], Keegan [Dufty JM: Okay. ogy and biochemistry major, and so just doing, as you know, a very raun- music and dancehall. It’s what you’d ’14]. So it was a musical and it was the I work in a lab and do that stuff. As chy, disturbingly—maybe sexy, it’s un- see in the Caribbean. It’s literally an oil real story of Shrek, that he was actually A: Why do you have so many clocks? far as my other stuff...I am really into clear—dance to, um, some songs. drum that they cut and indent and then a man who was just, like, on a lot of JM: Rizky Rahadianto. dance on campus, and so I’ve done indent the indent from the other side. drugs and living in a swamp. I played Terp. And I feel like Terp has put me A: Why so secretive? They push it back up from the bottom Daniel Day-Lewis. I do a really good This interview has been edited for onstage in front of a lot of people, JM: I don’t want to give away Vivaldi. to create these bumps and they’re differ- impression of him. length. and it’s the best show on campus. And Should I give away Vivaldi? ent notes. So yeah, you read music, and then I take a lot of performance class- it’s really fun. You play really awesome A: What did you do on the WSA? es, like dance classes and music classes, A: I think you should give it away. music, and it’s just so cool to learn a JM: Freshman spring and all soph- and I was on the WSA in front of a lot JM: To some Vivaldi. And to some, new instrument at such a late point in omore year I was on CoCo, the of people for a really long time, sent like, house music. It’s [to] “Pressure” my life. Community Outreach Committee, some emails out under my name by by Chase and Status and “Delirious” by now Community Committee. That was accident a couple times. Steve Aoki. And we think we know the A: Do you consider yourself a percus- a lot of talking and planning things to last song. We think the last one is going sionist? bring the campus together, get student A: What was your first Terp dance? to be “Jump Up” by Major Lazer. JM: Um, interesting question. I played groups working together, talk about JM: The first Terp dance I ever did was drums before. campus climate, and see what we can do choreographed by Nora Thompson A: Are you going to dance in it? to change things. A lot of working with [’15] and Liza Sankar-Gorton [’15], JM: Yes. A: Really? student groups. All the work we wanted and it was beach-themed. It was so JM: A little bit. Like, not really. When to do was through student groups. It’s great. It was a combination of songs. A: What else do you do in your life? I was younger. getting other people to have dialogue It was like, “Vamos a la Playa,” [“Sex Crosswords? and to work together. And then ju- On The Beach”]—I think it’s by the JM: Crosswords. I try, I really try. A: Did you take lessons? nior year I was coordinator and chair Vengaboys—and “Surfin’ U.S.A” JM: This is going to seem like I’m brag- of OEAC [the Outreach and External by the Beach Boys. And we all wore A: Why do you like crosswords? ging, but this is just a really funny story Affairs Committee]. So OEAC is re- beach clothing and at the 10 p.m. JM: Well I started doing the cross- about me and the drums. So when I sponsible for outreach and external af- performance we all took off our shirts word last year during physics. It got was, like, ten years old my parents fairs.... I sent all the emails to the whole halfway through the dance. It was me through my physics class—maybe I bought me a drum set for Hanukkah, campus, I sent all the emails inside the huge and fun. shouldn’t share that. and they were like, “You’re going to be WSA, I organized all the elections… C/O FACEBOOK.COM

“She’s basically the Kardashian of Wes 2015.” NOMINATE A WESCELEB [email protected] // [email protected] 6 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 arts Play: Religion Gets Put on “The Book of Trial in the WestCo Café Life” is All Style, No Substance By Ali Jamali each shift between the lands, the feel Staff Writer and energy of the movie changes to make every frame of it visually pleas- “The Book of Life” is the lat- ing. While the story is heavily influ- est attempt from Reel FX Creative enced by Mexican culture—some- Studios—the studio behind “Free thing that is often evaded to avoid Birds”—to bring a distinctive ani- limiting the audience demograph- mated feature to screens. It is a vi- ic—with visuals and a vibrant color sual masterpiece, but it ultimately pallet that are true to its theme and fails to leave a long-lasting effect the characters, these are perhaps the on its viewers. only things that will keep you pinned “The Book of Life” begins down on your seat. with a group of students arriv- Although there are effective ing at a museum on Nov. 2, the jokes lined up throughout the story, Day of the Dead, for a tour. A they can’t help the poorly written mysterious tour guide leads the script from worsening as the plot ad- NIC DE SOTO-FOLEY/STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER group through a spooky gate into vances. There is a smart twist in the “Lucy Goes To Court,” which goes up this weekend in the WestCo Café, features characters ranging a chamber that holds the magical middle of the movie that seems to from Gandhi to Saul Goodman. Book of Life. The guide proceeds suggest a promising sub-plot, but in- to tell the story of San Angel, a stead it seems like the writers treated Continued from front page The production, quite like its narra- Stage application materials until the night town in Mexico described as the it as a gap, desperately struggled to fill tive, is somewhat miraculous. Fahmy and they were due, Werlinich recalled. center of the universe, and two it, and then leapt to an anti-climatic Odenkirk. The prosecution consists of stage manager Nola Werlinich ’17 said they “Well, looking back, it’s indicative,” gods: La Muerte, the god of the and predictable ending. Mother Teresa (Hannah Skopicki ’18), struggled with repeated setbacks, including she said, laughing. Land of the Remembered, and Unfortunately, even the very King Henry VIII (Oren Maximov ’17), having to switch actors halfway through Fahmy said that working with other Xilbalba, the god of the Land of talented cast is not enough to dis- and Mitt Romney (Daniel Giovanniello the rehearsal process. Werlinich, like many inexperienced cast members helped calm the Forgotten. On the Day of tract from the charm-deficient script. ’17), each representing a different religion stage managers, is the unsung hero of the his anxieties about putting on a show. the Dead, these two gods bet on While there are some great romantic and acting nothing like their real-life coun- production: she recruited new cast and “It helped with me not being intimi- three kids, a girl named María songs along the journey of the three terparts. Mother Teresa livens up the room, crew members mere days before opening dated,” Fahmy said. “We were very newbie (voiced by Zoe Saldana) and two main characters, they are poorly in- prancing around in her long robes, scream- night. Before the penultimate rehearsal, she when this process started.” boys named Manolo and Joaquín tegrated into the soundtrack. There ing obscenities the real life version would gathered the ensemble in a warm-up while For Werlinich, that atmosphere con- (voiced by Diego Luna and are numerous scenes that could have never dare say in public (or, probably, at paint dried on the remaining pieces of the tributed to a more collaborative project. Channing Tatum, respectively) used a better soundtrack along with all). Romney and Henry VIII are at their set that were intended to transform the “We had a big cast and so many other who are both in love with María. the scenes that are unnecessarily over- best when they grovel at Mother Teresa’s Café into a distinguished heavenly court- people have joined the team since then, If María marries Manolo, Xilbalba lapped by a song. “The Book of Life” feet, which is not a sentence that gets writ- room, and Maia Nelles-Sager ’17 hung the and I was just excited to be working with will never interfere in mortal lives will make you furious with its writ- ten often. final lights. so many people,” Werlinich said. again, but if she marries Joaquín, ers since it could have been so much As the trial progresses, chaos reigns. “It’s been very appropriate,” Fahmy There does certainly seem to be a La Muerte will switch lands with more if only it had a screenplay wor- The intent of some characters is not as said. “For me, this is my first time directing sense of camaraderie amongst the large cast, Xilbalba. thy of its visual greatness. clear as it first seems, and Lucy becomes and my first time writing.” and that isn’t entirely surprising. The vast Last month, “The Boxtrolls” No one can deny that “The increasingly fed up with what she sees as Fahmy and Werlinich are among majority of them alternate between sitting brought a unique, beloved anima- Book of Life” is one of the most vi- false accusations while the court discusses quite a few novice combos producing shows together in the courtroom and hiding be- tion style back to screens, offer- sually inventive and striking films of the philosophy of war, America, sex, and this season. “Worm Queen,” “Godspell,” hind the set for the entirety of the produc- ing outstanding visuals for those the year, but it is also a perfect exam- other things. Most importantly, the court “Lucy,” and the upcoming “Theban Plays” tion. That is the exact type of situation that who are bored with the realistic ple that even visual perfection is not at large discusses religion. Gandhi (played all boast first-time directors and stage man- fosters cast bonding. images used in most Disney and enough to make a movie memorable by Fahmy) muses on the merits of Heaven, agers for the Wesleyan stage. The “Lucy” “There are so many inside jokes in Pixar movies. To my surprise, when an unsatisfactory script drags it while Lucy is adamant she is not the source cast is relatively new as well, with nine out the cast,” said Max Cembalest ’18, who “The Book of Life” brings yet an- down. With its breathtaking scenery of the world’s ills. of its 11 cast members never having acted plays the angel Gabriel. “They are vulgar, other style that is not often used and brilliantly designed characters, Fahmy makes the interesting deci- in a Wesleyan production before. they are disgusting, and none of them in the animation industry. The “The Book of Life” will certainly fas- sion to add several original songs to the “Neither of us had any idea what we make sense.” universe of “The Book of Life” cinate you through its runtime, and it production, but without live accompani- were doing,” Werlinich said. Lucifer and “Lucy” have been consists of three worlds, the Land deserves to be watched and cherished. ment. Actors instead sing to recordings or, When Fahmy asked Werlinich to through heaven and hell over the last two of the Living, the Land of the However, if you leave the cinema feel- more often then not, entirely a cappella. It stage manage his show, she accepted on a months, and now both arrive in WestCo Remembered, and the Land of the ing pitiful, you don’t need to worry, is an impressive feat for the performers to whim, later admitting she thought it was a this weekend. Seats are first-come, first- Forgotten. Each land is unique “The Book of Life” will soon disap- achieve. joke. They also didn’t submit their Second serve to Heaven’s courtroom. and astonishingly beautiful. With pear into the Land of the Forgotten. Run the Jewels Brings More Nihilism to Hip-Hop By Dan Bachman scorched-earth dance party, two guys POPPIN.’” But despite everything, ed this alive all year. Even these early strangest and most skilled nihilists, Staff Writer flipping over all of the furniture in it feels somewhat muted. “Jeopardy” standouts, however, don’t bring any- selling lines like, “It’s all a joke be- your house, stealing your pets, danc- is made of elements that are very thing new to what Run the Jewels tween mom contractions and cof- If you want to know what Run ing on your windpipe, and high-fiv- similar to those in the first track of has already done. fin fittings/ So we disappear in the the Jewels has above other hip-hop ing each other about it later because their last LP, “Run the Jewels,” but It is in the second half, when smoke like we’re fuckin’ magicians.” duos, watch the interview they did what are you going to do about it? it lacks that song’s searing intensity. the duo experiments and gets to But the star is Killer Mike, and his for Pitchfork’s “Over/Under” series. The first LP was probably more Chalk it up to diminishing returns, play around, where Run the Jewels smooth, heavy voice throws volleys After being asked whether Hulk of a breakthrough than either art- perhaps; it’s good, but it’s just not 2 shines. The pulsating, hypnotic ar- of words at the audience the way Hogan was overrated or underrated, ist had previously in their careers, quite as good as it was. peggios and metallic drums of “Lie Zeus throws lightning bolts. rapper Killer Mike paused for a sec- not because it was better than their The same can be said for most Cheat, Steal,” the hook on “Early” With Run the Jewels 2, Killer ond, thought about it, and replied, previous work, but because it is an of the first half of Run the Jewels 2. that feels like a great remix of a Mike and El-P continue to set the calmly, “Fuck Hulk Hogan.” He then unbelievably engaging and entertain- Tracks like “Oh Darling Don’t Cry” Radiohead song, the genuinely sur- world on fire with smiles on their proceeded to deliver a minute-long ing listen. The camaraderie between and “All My Life” feel like they’re re- prising appearance of drummer and faces. And while it’s less graceful diatribe, tearing Hogan apart, while the two wasn’t obscured but was in working two songs from the previ- middle-school hero Travis Barker on than it was last the time out, who rapper and producer El-P interjected, fact amplified by the violence of the ous LP, “Banana Clipper” and “Sea “All Due Respect,” and the glitchy are you to stop them? over and over again, “Hogan! Hogan! record. So, here we are, a year, later, Legs.” They’re effective and fun to MIDI organ on “Crown” all bring We’re coming for you, Hogan!” The with Run the Jewels 2. listen to but they don’t pack the same something new to the Run the Jewels two chuckled and moved on to the Run The Jewels 2 begins the punch as the tracks they resemble. In aesthetic. These songs feature dy- next question. only way it can, with Killer Mike’s transposing beats that he has made namic, interesting, new production, Recycle Run the Jewels is a project built thick, deep voice shouting something before, El-P loses a little bit in trans- something missing from the first half on three things: idiocy, aggression, brutal and unintelligible, before lation, and the verses don’t have the of the album. When he’s on, El-P is and friendship. Their first, self-titled declaring a chest-thumping, “Let’s same fire as they did a year prior. the best producer in the game. this LP is one of my favorites of last year. GO, El-P!! HUH?” that gives way to However, the two pre-release sin- But El-P isn’t always on. While these two artists are known the opening track, “Jeopardy.” The gles from the first half, “Blockbuster Production on the album varies for socially-conscious, politically beat is right in El-P’s wheelhouse, Night Part 1” and “Close Your Eyes wildly from stale to stunning. The Argus. charged, raw hip-hop (Killer Mike’s low, fuzzed out bass, cheap, heavy (And Count to Fuck),” fare better. verses, however, are consistently ex- “Reagan” and El-P’s “Drones Over drums, with the addition of a vio- They both have a playful buoyancy cellent. These two MCs have distinc- BKLYN” are masterpieces in their lin and a trombone solo. It’s a great matched with stark, soldier-like ag- tive styles that play off of each other own right), their first fully collabora- beat that gets better after multiple gression. “Close Your Eyes” in par- excellently. El-P is slick, sly, and sav- tive album had one goal: to figure out listens, and El-P delivers one hell of ticular benefits from the appearance age, with words tumbling over each how many ways one could creatively a final line with, “Run the Jewels is of Rage Against the Machine vocalist other in his thick, Brooklyn accent. threaten a person. The result was a the answer/the question is ‘WHAT’S Zach de la Rocha, who hasn’t sound- He remains one of the country’s FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS arts • 7 Who Wore It Wes: Halloween Edition By Gavriella Wolf room that withers away with disuse where Halloween spans multiple Staff Writer for most of the year, and Halloween is nights and possibly multiple cos- its time to shine,” Baurer said. “If any- tumes, it’s nice to band together with In case you haven’t noticed (or are one is looking for face paint, brightly friends for an ensemble outfit, perfect still a freshman), Halloween is a big colored leggings, a mask, or anything for big group photos. deal on college campuses. The excessive else, I’m your girl. I also like raiding Maia Nelles-Sager ’17, Kiley amount of candy and horror-themed the Rite-Aid candy isle on November Rossetter ’17, and Allison Cronan ’17 paraphernalia everywhere is both entic- 1 when all the candy goes on super- are all teaming up to dress as characters ing and daunting. Wearing a costume is sale.” from Guardians of the Galaxy, with one childhood tradition that students Alexa Burzinski ’15 is dressing as Nelles-Sager as Star-Lord, Rossetter as rarely eschew; in fact, almost every the pink emoji girl every iPhone user Gamora, and Cronan as Groot. The party during “Halloweekend” expects has come to know so well. group is mostly drawing from clothing people to dress up. “I’m just wearing a pink, long- they already have, bringing in various For some, it is a hassle or a source sleeved v-neck, and I’m straighten- accents and hair dye to make it hap- of stress to conjure up a costume that’s ing my hair,” Bursinkzi said. “Not pen. creative, clever, silly, or sexy. Some slap sure what I’m doing for bottoms yet, “I think my costumes are usually a pair of animal ears on their heads though. Also [I’m] going to be striking colored by who I do them with, and and call it a day. But for others, the all the poses all night.” group or pair costumes are often way perfect Halloween costume is an art, People may have already more fun than just being something and the Wesleyan atmosphere encour- seen Karmenife Paulino ’16 wear- clever,” Nelles-Sager said. ages all kinds of debauchery and cre- ing her Tina Belcher—from “Bob’s I am taking part in a group cos- ativity at which the real world might Burgers”—oufit around campus. tume as well. My housemates and I turn its nose. For my final Wesleyan “I plan my costumes months are dressing up as Abraham Lincoln Halloweekend, I decided to look to in advance,” Paulino said. “I love through the ages, an admittedly weird the costumes of others for inspiration Halloween because it’s a celebration of but unique collaboration. and entertainment. I gathered a sample transformation. It also gives me an in- Jeff Kasanoff ’15, one of my of Halloween costumes to give you a credible chance to witness the creativ- housemates, came up with the idea for sneak peak as to what this weekend will ity of others firsthand. Plus, the free our group costume. have to offer. candy doesn’t hurt.” “We were going to be histori- Talia Baurer ’15 brings her ex- Some students look to make cal figures, but we all wanted to be perience as an intern with the Center statements through their costumes. Lincoln because he’s obviously the for Sexual Pleasure and Health in Matt Fine ’15 said he is stuck between best,” Kasanoff said. “This seemed Providence, RI, as well as her role as two options for costumes, contingent like the best way to make everyone a sex columnist for The Argus, to her on how much time he has to get to the happy. We’re all wearing the signature costume. costume store. hat and beard with our own twist. “I’m being a condom fairy for “[I’m dressing as] Uncle Sam, Personally, I’ll be in a caveman cos- Halloween,” Baurer said. “I have a belt with fake blood splattered all over tume with a club and terrible posture, that holds a condom in the buckle, so my body,” Fine said. “I am going as a as pre-historic Lincoln.” GAVRIELLA WOLF/STAFF WRITER I’m wearing that, and I taped strips Marxist critique of capitalism. This is The rest of the group includes Karmenife Paulino ’16 chose to wear a spot-on Tina Belcher cos- of condoms—in their wrappers!—to midterm week for me, so if I can actu- a ’50s housewife Lincoln, a ’70s hip- tume for her Halloweekend. it to make a condom skirt. I also tied ally go out and grab the costume, I’m pie Lincoln, a ’20s flapper Lincoln, dental dams together to make sus- gonna be it. If not, I’m going to wear an ’80s Jazzercise Lincoln, and even has to offer. The Wesleyan Student sexy animals and more traditional penders. The rest is a surprise!” sweatpants and a t-shirt or something a Lincoln from the future, with a full Assembly’s Community Committee outfits is sure to emerge, but there’s Baurer said she loves Halloween like that and be ‘the feeling of just giv- robot costume. has assembled an entire list of every- always a guarantee that some students for the opportunity to break out ing up.’” The best way to witness thing going on, from concerts and will put their creativity where it really bright costumes. Group costumes are also a popu- Wesleyan’s costume creativity is to dance parties to more traditional counts: into memorable Halloween “I have a big costume box in my lar choice. At a place like Wesleyan, explore the nightlife Halloweekend trick-or-treating. A fair number of costumes. Grad Student Confronts Tinnitus Through Music By Charles Martin this music was ear-piercing. Yet as ing hit by stray buckshot. He killed received a multitude of emails from told one story of a close friend who Staff Writer the suite proceeded my ears adjust- himself in 2010, and in his suicide neuroscientists commending his also suffers tinnitus and came to see ed to the subtle dimensions of the letter, he blamed the roaring sound work. Fishkin is also currently an the “Suites.” The condition of tinnitus, in never-static sound in a way that de- in both ears. ambassador for the German-based “She had to leave after two min- its most common form, creates a manded my absolute focus. “I hope that my death will help Tinnitus society Deutsche Tinnitus- utes,” Fishkin recalled. “She said, sound that is totally subjective, a fre- When the lights dimmed to bring about some cure for those that Stiftung. ‘You got it!’ But I felt I’d failed. I’m quency that can only ever be heard accompany one movement, it gen- suffer with tinnitus by bringing at- And yet, Fishkin said he is con- not trying to convey it: Tinnitus has by whomever it afflicts. Whether it uinely felt as if part of the world tention to it. It is important that my stantly struggling to adapt his work no acoustic composition. I also felt I takes the form of a ringing, hissing, around me had been swallowed up, life will not be wasted,” the letter to best convey the experience that failed a fellow sufferer. Advocacy is a or clicking, the noise makes itself leaving me alone within this all-en- reads. he and many others endure. Fishkin critical part of my work.” a way of life for its host. When ex- veloping resonance. At some points, Fishkin calls the “Tinnitus plaining his own experience with the an unpredictable dissonance inter- Suites” his lifework, and he hopes it condition, University graduate stu- rupted the regularity of the sound. won’t go to waste either. dent Daniel Fishkin makes it clear It was a surreal phenomenon when “I think tinnitus is stuck on that uncontrollable sounds are ever- the tone my ears had struggled to the margins,” Fishkin said. “I want present. adapt to suddenly came to an end to cure tinnitus; I want to create an “I hear different things all the and was replaced by sharp applause. urgency.” time. It comes and goes, grows and This strange experience of deal- When Fishkin talks about his swells,” Fishkin said. “Doctors told ing with a sound that seems to come musical process, he is eager to avoid me to get used to my tinnitus; I de- not from without but from within, any labels of innovation or novelty. cided not to get used to it but to use is something that Fishkin has had Although his work does fit within it.” to deal with for the past six years. the experimental tradition, Fishkin Fishkin’s “Composing the His tinnitus first emerged while he also likes to cite his early background Tinnitus Suites: 2014” is both a was working on his senior recital in in punk music, a genre in which tal- confrontational tour of the nature music composition at Bard College, ent and skill sometimes aren’t always of tinnitus as well as an ode to his causing a ringing that grew painful as vital as tenacity and dedication to own relationship with the condi- during loud noises. The new pain producing one’s own sounds. tion. He performed the 35-min- associated with music also caused a “From punk rock, I learned that ute piece, part of his larger show creative block; Fishkin found him- I didn’t have to be a master of some- “Transitions,” this past Tuesday at self growing increasingly distrustful thing in order to devote my life to the World Music Hall. The Lady’s of his former passion. it,” Fishkin said. Harp, a musical instrument and in- “I used to think of sound as a Even for constructing the stallation of Fishkin’s own creation, neutral phenomenon, and I used Lady’s Harp, Fishkin refuses to ac- was the centerpiece of the suite: He to think of music as a benevolent cept full credit. He explained that would manipulate a feedback ampli- force,” Fishkin said. “Now music the name of the instrument is a trib- fier connected to a set of 25-foot- can be quite threatening, something ute to the composers Ellen Fullman long piano wires, carefully adjusted not to be trusted.” and Maryanne Amacher. by Gabriel Greenberg ’14, Adam After composing—at least in What Fishkin played on Johnson ’14, and Noah Rush ’14, the way he had previously conceived Tuesday was the fourth incarna- sending a haunting, whining fre- it—was rendered impossible by his tion of the “Tinitus Suites,” with quency throughout the room. condition, Fishkin began to study previous versions receiving perfor- Most striking about circuitry, which eventually led him mances in Philadelphia, Brooklyn, “Composing the Tinnitus Suites: to experimenting with amplified and Greensboro, N.C. Fishkin’s next 2014” was the powerful experience feedback. He also steadily discov- rendition, “Composing the Tinitus of loneliness and isolation that it ered more about tinnitus, finding Suites: 2015,” will take place at evoked. The slowly morphing fre- inspiration not only from other Wesleyan in late March. quency began shrill and discomfort- afflicted musicians but also from So far, he’s earned a wide array ing; its frequency and volume were the story of William L. Morris. of positive feedback, including an ar- so overpowering that I could actually The sheriff of Greene County, Va., ticle on the “Suites” on Nature.com. feel my sternum vibrating. Literally, Morris suffered tinnitus after be- After this was published, Fishkin 8 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 opinion Unpopular Opinion: Demystifying Conservative Talking Points By Bryan Stascavage, Staff Writer

Recently the Opinion section Religion: The discussion of abor- lazy,” but there is anecdotal evidence taken out of their paychecks once they and bureaucratic. Do you really want published an article called “The tion leads me to discussing the role of to support the fact that there are many themselves are employed. the same type of people who run the Elephant in the Room,” in which religion. Religion is much more than people on the government dime look- Gay Marriage: Stances on gay DMV to be in charge of running your Jenny Davis calls for conservatives a priest’s droning on and on and on ing for ways to keep the free money marriage are usually cultural and can healthcare? Instead, via the private on campus to speak up in order to in front of a congregation: it is a sys- flowing. Conservatives see increas- transcend political party lines. Many market, conservatives want to drive provide a voice that has been silent tem of morals. Despite liberals’ claims ing the aid to these people as a thinly Hispanic and black Democrats have down costs while leaving the indi- on this campus for some time. I, as a that the United States’ founders were veiled way for Democrats to use gov- historically been anti-gay marriage vidual in charge and in power of one’s moderate conservative, shall attempt not religious, religion played a huge ernment money to buy votes and to and routinely vote against state bills, healthcare decisions. Yes, I know that to provide that voice. It should be part in the formation of America, pay people to stay at home instead of such as the one in California, that other countries have a single-payer noted: in some cases I am expressing specifically the morals and ideals of committing crimes. would legalize same-sex marriage. system that supposedly works. But views that I agree with and in others I Protestant individualism. It’s what a My own views on welfare were Another reason for the anti-gay mar- those countries also have small, ho- am expressing views I don’t agree with virtuous citizen looks like: hard work- solidified when I went to Haiti in riage position is that Republicans have mogeneous populations that are sub- and will explain why. ing, independent, productive, person- 2010 after the earthquake. The mod- a specific view of what makes a virtu- sidized by the United States military Abortion: In a country where our ally accountable, charitable, and fru- ern welfare state is not a pretty pic- ous citizen, and specific views on how and pharmaceutical companies. It is politics are complex, abortion is one gal. Honestly, I like this version of a ture. I believe that given our nation’s to promote the next generation of vir- easy to pay for health care when the of those issues that can turn entire virtuous American. This is why, in an wealth, we can afford to provide a cer- tuous citizens—namely, through the U.S. government is nearby, providing demographics into single-issue vot- oversimplified way, so many conserva- tain baseline living for every citizen. traditional family, a male and female military power and drugs. ers. Simply put, many conservatives tives are against welfare; they believe I also think, though, that our current who are married and raise their chil- Health insurance itself is the are pro-life and vote for pro-life can- a hard-working American never needs welfare system is destroying commu- dren to be “good” Americans. In their problem: it encourages waste and didates. When I engaged pro-life sup- welfare or that it should be very tem- nities. This is a view that I share with minds, gay marriage short-circuits overspending. By increasing compe- porters in conversation, I quickly real- porary. I will elaborate on this later. political scientist Michael Sandel. this “natural order” and creates or pro- tition among health insurance com- ized this is not a women’s rights issue If you take conservative religiousness Welfare is more destructive and more motes the existence of citizens who are panies, or removing them altogether, for them. They believe that abortion as simply a system of morals, then addictive than heroin, and it makes partly responsible for the dysfunction healthcare providers will be forced to is government-sanctioned murder, the divide between liberals and con- people beholden to a bureaucrat who that is present in today’s society. price services that reflect actual costs. and that there should be a voice for servatives isn’t as wide as you think. lives thousands of miles away rather I do not agree with this view, As it stands, healthcare providers issue the unborn since they can’t speak for Liberals have their own system of to their local communities. It isolates but I am simply providing an ex- bills to customers expecting them to themselves. A response I once got is, morals: openness, inclusiveness, ac- people and perpetuates cycles of pov- planation for this perspective to the be negotiated down. This favors insur- “If a woman were to commit murder, ceptance, charity, and so on. We both erty. Conservatives want to reform best of my ability from my research ance companies and leaves individuals it wouldn’t be a women’s right issue, it want to promote the idea of a virtuous welfare and to build up local commu- and conversations. I hope that con- in an inferior negotiating position. would be a murder case. Abortion is citizen, but we disagree on what that nities, just as Robert F. Kennedy tried servatives change their views on this I am, however, in favor of “OS” the same thing.” citizen looks like. Calling conserva- to do. I would support a system in topic. Simply put, I cannot fathom (OH SHIT) insurance being provided I personally am pro-choice, as I tives “religious right-wing nut jobs” which welfare recipients perform some how a group of people that believes by the government in a single-payer do not think the government should is divisive and toxic, just as calling form of community service or are the government should keep out of a style system. That means that things be allowed any measure of jurisdic- liberals “left-wing godless nut jobs” is provided assistance while they go to person’s private life can turn around such as cancer and other debilitating tion over a person’s body. I do believe, detrimental. Toning down the vitriol community college. That way, people and endorse the government’s dictat- diseases or injuries will be covered by though, that abortion is ethically and is essential to working together again. would feel as though they have earned ing whom one can and cannot marry. the government, but the day-to-day morally wrong, as long as the fetus is Welfare: I have talked to social their money from the government, a Healthcare: Let it be known health costs are paid for by the indi- not a product of rape or incest. More workers who have become vehement feeling which would in turn empower that conservatives want healthcare vidual. I believe this will significantly importantly, this is a private issue, conservatives after some experience them and make them free. This would to be accessible to everyone; we just cut down on medical bankruptcies. and one that I personally wish con- doing their jobs. Conservatives are also encourage more Americans to disagree on how to implement that servatives would pursue in the private derided for being “anti-poor” or ac- get off welfare, become productive, goal. The government, while good for Stascavage is a member of the class arena. cused of thinking that “the poor are and pay back the taxpayers via taxes some things, is incredibly inefficient of 2018. FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS opinion • 9 A Matter of Course: Technology in the Classroom Raises Deeper Questions By Isabel Fattal, Staff Writer

On the first day of the new semes- lecture quiz. second nature to most students. The student Nicole Short argues that laptops nology. ter, the professors for three out of my It makes sense that the distraction popularity of this phenomenon is worth should not be banned from the class- Banning laptops, or not banning four classes mentioned that they discour- of using a laptop, be it through visiting questioning. room. Instead, students should be given them, is not enough. Technology has aged the use of laptops in class. I sighed other sites or simply being consumed by The use of technology has not just the option of distraction, and if they been around for a while now, albeit a in disappointment with the rest of my the mindless task of typing, minimizes a affected the level of focus that we give to truly do desire to learn, they will learn short while, but real discussion about the classmates. But after a moment, to my student’s ability to absorb information. our work; it has also changed the qual- to overcome this temptation. This view ramifications of its use seems less com- surprise, I found myself feeling relieved. But it seems that the problem that we are ity of the work itself by offering us an seems overly optimistic. It would be ide- mon in college than it should be. The Taking notes on my computer for a few attempting to solve by banning laptops opportunity to retrieve information in- al if students were able to actively make questions raised by technology are not of my classes last year was certainly easier extends beyond the laptops themselves stantly. No matter how reputable the the choice to engage with their learn- just questions about distraction or temp- than writing by hand, but once I thought and even beyond technological devices sources that we find on Google might ing despite the rivaling temptations of tation. They are deeper human ques- about it, I realized that I was mainly ex- in general. The real question is rooted be, there is a difference between looking technology, but in light of the fact that tions about how we learn, and they must cited to be free of the constantly looming in the values and habits that our use of up a term in an instant search engine and the need has arisen to debate whether or be addressed if we ever hope to reach distractions of new emails or Facebook these devices has inculcated in us. going to the greater lengths of looking not to ban laptops from the classroom, an understanding of how technology notifications—or the distraction of the The average college student’s use of the term up in a book or discussing it it seems to me that we’re not there yet. should be used in the service of learning. student in front of me checking these technology encourages a short attention with a professor. Technology offers us a College students might not be ready to Whatever decision professors or students same sites—and, most importantly, the span and a commitment to speed over world of information that is, quite liter- choose learning, and it’s time for us to might make about the use of technol- individual walls of distance that the slow and careful study, two traits which ally, at our fingertips, and we are lucky figure out why. It is our obligation as ogy in the classroom, these questions screens seemed to form between each drastically change the way in which we to have such a vast array of resources at students to delve more deeply into the can serve as springboards for discussion student and the rest of the class. learn. When we spend an afternoon our disposal. But the consequence of this impacts of technology on our education about the importance, for example, of Banning laptops seems to be a juggling writing a paper with checking innovation is that we have learned the and our values, and this can only hap- an engaging classroom environment, fairly popular decision in college classes Facebook or creating new playlists on art of quick intake: We Google, we skim, pen through reflection about the influ- and about why complete focus and open and for good reason. In a piece in The Pandora, we brush these distractions and minutes or seconds later we close the ence of technology on what and how we interaction with one’s classmates are es- New Yorker over the summer that ar- off as a normal, inevitable part of doing tab, telling ourselves that we have fin- learn. Technology can be a powerful tool sential to this environment. Through gued for the banning of laptops in the schoolwork, but most of us don’t stop to ished learning about a particular topic. for both harm and good in the field of these types of discussions, we can pave classroom, Dartmouth professor Dan think about what it means that it is so We’re often aware that this knowledge education, and it is the task of professors the way for an image of technology not Rockmore cites a Cornell University ordinary, even expected, for us to be as will likely disappear from our memory and students alike to take steps to figure as a replacement for older methods of study from 2003 called “The Laptop easily distracted as we are. What does it as soon as the test or paper is over, but out how it ought to be used. Professors learning but instead as a newer, shinier and the Lecture,” in which half of a class mean that we would rather hop around even this can seem like a tiny problem: should encourage students to use tech- aid in the service of an ever-consistent was given permission to use their laptops among countless diversions than focus We can always Google the information nology in the right way and discourage goal: education. while the other half was not; the study intently on the task at hand? Using these again. them from doing the opposite, and most showed that the students who did not distractions now and then isn’t necessar- In a September article in the importantly, they should provide reasons Fattal is a member of the class of use their laptops scored better on a post- ily a bad thing, but their use has become Journal of Higher Education, college for their decisions about the use of tech- 2017. Don’t Be Yourself; Who Is That, Anyway? By Jenny Davis, Opinion Editor

It’s Halloween, and we all know ously happy and supremely confident Identity Disorder (DID); it was what that means. In a PG-13 world, in my life are when I’ve been channel- known then as Multiple Personality at least, it’s time to break out the cos- ing someone else or wholeheartedly Disorder. Sybil, the main character, is tumes. Some will show up as dead pretending to be someone else. That a woman with a traumatic past who brides, and others will be mermaids, sentence reads as though I hate myself, copes by fracturing into 16 different or Nancy Drew, or politicians, or but as “myself” is nothing more than personalities. She is based on Shirley characters from movies, or all sorts of the 40-plus characters that live under Mason, a Minnesotan treated by fa- delicious puns. my skin, it’s quite the opposite. Being mous psychiatrist Cornelia Wilbur, And some of us really get into somebody else is being incredibly kind known for popularizing the diagnosis it: We act as though we’re that new to myself. I let other characters take of DID in the 1960s. character, adopting the creepiness, over and do what do they best. Let me Though the jury is out on sultriness, effervescence, and knack explain. whether DID is a real phenomenon for solving mysteries of those we’re In my life, I’m Flora Goldwasser or not—Debbie Nathan, author of portraying. Usually, though, the act is (a glamorous teen I made up) when “Sybil Exposed,” accuses Dr. Wilbur short-lived, and we go back to being faced with adversity, I’m Judy Blume’s and Flora Rheta Schreiber, the au- ourselves at the end of the night. Rachel Robinson when I’m organizing thor of the original novel “Sybil,” of Some people love Halloween my sock drawer, I’m my 10th grade manipulating poor Shirley Mason for because it’s a chance to dress up as chemistry teacher when doing a math financial gain—having multiple per- somebody totally different, to forget problem of any kind, I’m Laura Ingalls sonalities, in the non-medical sense, is their sorry lives and look and act like Wilder when confronted with nature, stigmatized. We as a culture are fond of Hillary Clinton or Beyoncé for an I’m a 64-year-old Frenchwoman consistency. We don’t like the unpre- entire evening. Halloween is a total while shopping for groceries, I’m a dictable, the unexpected. Consistency, escape, a day that it’s finally O.K. to 1950s track star from Indiana when though, is vastly overrated. attend in disguise. running, I’m Bartleby when feeling Some of us love taking personal- But it doesn’t have to be that way. overwhelmed with homework, I’m ity tests. Those are all about tenden- We can be new characters any old time Professor Lois Brown when participat- cies. But who cares about knowing we want—changing our personalities ing in class, and I’m the teenaged ano- what your personality is? Who you to suit any situation or any whim— rectic from the movie version of “The are is who you think you are, and it’s and indeed we should. “Be yourself” Best Little Girl in the World” when who other people think you are. There is the worst advice ever cooed to teen- crossing any bridge with my arms full is no essential “you,” no matter how agers and pathetic adults. Don’t be of books. old you are or how many personality yourself. Who is “yourself,” anyway, if But it’s easy for me to say, right? tests you take. At the core of it all, not a creature of your own invention, I’m a Gemini, so maybe having more you’re just organs and blood and stuff. and why should we care at all about than one side comes naturally. And Personality is just a way of categoriz- this person that many of us trek to though I will admit that acting like a ing a bunch of tendencies. Friends, do Do you have an Southeast Asia or Nepal to find? totally new person—Miranda Priestly, not categorize yourselves or let your- More importantly, is it really the demon boss from “The Devil selves be categorized. Be the person realistic to expect “yourself” to be at Wear’s Prada,” for example, when pro- you want to be, even if that person all consistent for more than two days? claiming my distaste for people who changes shape every day. You’re al- unpopular opinion? Why go to all the trouble of finding move at glacial paces while plucking lowed. yourself just to lose that person in a tomatoes individually from the salad Don’t limit your costumes to crowed Designer Shoe Warehouse bar container—gets a few eyebrow Halloween. Switch who you are con- during the holiday season? Instead raises, it’s worth it. It’s totally worth stantly. Never stay the same person of being yourself, be the person you it. Being or channeling someone else for too long; it’s boring and restric- want to be, whether that person is a is not a lie because, after all, I’m the tive. You can accommodate thousands character (an existing one or one that one doing the pretending. Don’t listen of personalities. Unleash your inner Email Jenny Davis: you make up), a mermaid, or even a to people who say that changing who Sybil. pun. It takes a whole lot of pressure off you are on a whim is being “fake.” So don’t be yourself. God, no! “staying true to yourself” (the second- Fakeness is a social construct. Never be yourself. There are too many [email protected] worst piece of advice ever cooed to In 1976, the movie “Sybil” was all hats, both literal and figurative, to try teenagers and pathetic adults), and it’s the rage. The plot is supposedly based on. much more fun. on a true story of a woman who suffers The only times I’ve been deliri- from what is now called Dissociative Davis is a member of the class of 2017. 10 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 sports Coach Feature: A Chat with Tennis Coach Mike Fried By Asher Young on and off Wall Street for the next 15 coaching you’ve done in the past? tennis in a really cool setting at Wesleyan. you think they draw from your personal Staff Writer years or so. A few years ago, the business MF: The similarity is that what I was do- That’s what distinguishes us from most playing style at all? that I was working for started a smaller ing long ago at these academies was work- other places: just the feel, the setting, and MF: Absolutely. Most of my coaching After taking the unusual route of be- company, and the niche we were working ing with very high-achieving, high-goal- the types of people here. The full immer- now comes from understanding the per- coming the head coach of both the men’s in was changing pretty rapidly. So around setting types of kids, and we’re looking to sion into the recruiting side of things was spective of having gone through it at ev- and women’s tennis teams, Mike Fried has the time that we were going to have to do the same thing here. So the difference, the biggest transition from a volunteer po- ery level, taking all the things I did well begun to build up what looks to be one of evolve with that niche and reinvent our- and the reason I was never really attracted sition to head coach. and the many more things I didn’t do as the strongest programs in the NESCAC. selves was the same time that I really to the academy setting or the junior set- well as I could’ve. This is in terms of ev- For the first time in the program’s history, started to miss tennis again, sincerely, for ting, is that I really think to be a part of A: How does the double duty of coaching erything: in terms of comprehensiveness Fried brought recruiting classes for both the first time in a long time. Through one that in a team setting is exponentially teams affect your recruiting? of training, off-court training, nutrition, the men’s and women’s teams, which were thing or another, I started playing a little more rewarding for the kids, and for me. MF: On the one hand, it’s a huge chal- sports psychology, and just trying to ap- top-three ranked nationally. In light of bit of tennis again myself for the first time, Here, you have the ability to create a cul- lenge, and one that our premier competi- ply everything that I loved from my own the end of this fall’s tennis season, Fried and started working with some of the very ture that maximizes what I think is the tion isn’t faced with exactly. It’s consider- college tennis experience. And at the same answered some questions about his path good juniors in New England. That led coolest part of college tennis: a very, very ably more work, for sure, and it has me time, it’s about trying to bring to the table to Wesleyan and the process of creating a me to come up here and begin to volun- individual sport in a team setting. That’s travelling in the summertime a lot more everything I wish had either been avail- successful program. teer a bit with the teams here, and I kind what gets me most excited about coaching than most people. At the same time, I love able to me [during my career], or that I of fell in love with the school and work- college tennis. that challenge. It does get a little rough had the ability to take advantage of at the The Argus: Where did you grow up and ing with kids at this age and this potential sometimes, but at the end of it, I can’t time and didn’t. how did you initially become involved tennis level. A couple years later, strangely A: As you moved through the Wesleyan imagine not doing it for both programs. with tennis? enough, here I am, and I’m happy to be tennis programs, starting as a volunteer There are such distinct subtleties in both A: How did your college experience com- Mike Fried: I grew up in Poughkeepsie, here. coach for the women’s team and becom- coaching and in the recruiting process for pare to the type of experience your play- New York, which is famous for Vassar ing the head coach for both the men’s and the men and women, and I think the dif- ers are getting now? Are there significant College and that’s about it. I started play- A: When you were at Brown and figuring women’s teams, what types of responsi- ferences are cool. I’m excited to try and do differences between the Division I tennis ing tennis when I was probably seven or out life past college, did you think about bilities came with each jump up in the something that we’ve never done here be- you played and the Division III level that eight, particularly in the summertime. I coaching a college team as something you system? fore, which is trying to produce top-level you’re coaching now? used to get dropped off at tennis courts might do? MF: On a volunteer basis, it was just when national tennis teams. MF: I think, truth be told, our teams and stay there all day and play until my MF: You know, I always did think at some my time allowed me to come up and work right now would play very competitively dad would come by on the way home point I’d love to coach college tennis, and with the teams, and I loved it, but it was A: Just about every Wesleyan athletic team with my college team. So that distinction from work. He would also play with me ironically enough I never really thought largely intermittent. Coming in more for- has become far more competitive over the between D-I and D-III is one of the cool for a little while before going home. I got that coaching junior tennis at a younger mally as the assistant coach of both teams, last several years. Where in your program things that’s rapidly disappeared in the really into it at a really young age, prob- age, or coaching tennis at any level or it really allowed me to get a better sense of does that growing competitiveness come last 10 years or so. Top-level Division III ably too young. I started playing tourna- location other than collegiately, as very not only the types of kids that Wesleyan from? tennis is easily competitive with anything ment tennis around 10 or 11 and did it attractive. I loved the idea of coaching a was attracting in terms of student-athletes MF: [Athletic Director] Mike Whalen has outside top-50 national Division I tennis, pretty competitively, nationally and in- college team in theory all along. At the and students as a whole, but also the types really been the catalyst for that whole pro- and that used to be a bigger gap for sure. ternationally, through the 14, 16, and 18 time, I thought the concept of doing that of kids that the other NESCAC schools cess. He hired me, and one of the things As for the experience itself, we’re doing [and under] age groups. I played tennis and potentially teaching college classes in and the top-ranked Division III programs that actually excited me about coming to more here in terms of that comprehen- when I was at Brown and played pretty one of the fields that I studied would be were attracting. That really paved the way Wesleyan was his presence. He was very siveness with strength training, off-court unsuccessful tennis for a year or two on really attractive. But that was when I was for me when I did take over the head- excited about the idea of creating top-cali- conditioning work, and flexibility and the professional tour after college, and as I young and naïve and didn’t realize that it coaching role by giving me a better sense ber national tennis teams here, and it’s his injury-prevention stuff. We work with an was kind of winding that down, I ran part takes 90 hours a week to coach the tennis of how I was going to recruit. The answer enthusiasm and support of the program outside nutritionist and a sports psycholo- of the program for a couple of the bigger teams, and certainly just as much to teach to that, which is the same with most of that’s really the backbone of what we’re gist that I bring in, so I think we do as junior tennis academies in south Florida. any classes, so it didn’t pan out that way. these other schools we’re competing with trying to do. It certainly mimics my own, much if not more so than a huge portion Then, through a tennis-related in- and trying to join the ranks of, is the foun- and he’s a cool guy to have in your corner. of the Division I teams, just in terms of troduction, I went completely in the oth- A: How does coaching a tennis team like dation of a tremendous educational op- what we’re trying to make available with er direction and went to work in finance Wesleyan’s compare to the individual portunity with the balance of top national A: As far as your coaching methods go, do regard to resources and information.

Field Hockey Falls to Camels Good stuff. Good price. By Grant Lounsbury the half, to send the Cardinals into a half minutes later the Cards once Staff Writer halftime with the score remaining again found themselves in their de- 1-0. fensive half. After a scrum in front of goodwill Wednesday night’s field hockey A mere 35 minutes were all the Cardinals’ net, the Camels were Goodwill. game held high stakes for both the that separated the Cardinals from a awarded a penalty stroke, and they Cardinals and Conn. College’s Camels, win and a sixth straight playoff ap- did not waste the opportunity: they as the game determined which team pearance, but the Camels were not capitalized on the penalty stroke and would make the NESCAC tourna- ready to have their season end. The took the 3-2 lead, which held as the ment as the eighth and final seed. For Camels came out determined in final score. the Cardinals a win meant they would the second half, but they could not “Everyone really played with scary good be in, but a loss would put them in a convert for an equalizer as Grundy heart this season,” Plappert stated three-way tie with the Camels and the and the Cardinals’ defense stood after the game. “Wednesday we just Hamilton Continentals for the eighth strong. Once again on the attack, couldn’t pull out the win; Conn. re- halloween finds! and final playoff spot. the Cardinals wasted no time. As a ally upped their tempo in the second Both teams knew the impor- result of their perseverance, the Birds half. Regardless, we’ve had a lot of fun tance of a win for the evening, and were awarded a penalty corner. Off this year. Goodwill – Your Halloween Headquarters their play on the field reflected it. The the inbound pass, Vanessa Block ’15 The loss put the Camels, Cardinals came out firing and domi- took a shot that was stopped by the Cardinals, and Continentals in a nated the pace of play throughout the Camels’ netminder, but the rebound three-way tie, with the tiebreaker also We’ve got everything you need first half. The Cardinals spent most of came out to Hemphill. Hemphill even as the three each held 1-1 records the opening 11 minutes of the game lobbed the ball over the goalie, who against each other. Therefore, to de- for your costume and more possessing the ball in their offensive was still recovering from the initial termine which team would make the end, creating some quality scoring op- save, into the back of the net and playoffs a name was drawn randomly frightfully fun surprises! portunities. gave the Cardinals a commanding out of a hat, and unfortunately for In the 11th minute, the Camels 2-0 lead with 20 minutes to play. the Old Methodists, the Continentals tried to clear the ball out of their own “I think that when we went up were selected. defensive end, but the Cardinals ap- by two goals, we felt like that was Despite dropping their last seven MIDDLETOWN plied enough pressure to stay put. a good enough lead, whereas Conn games of the season, the Cardinals Mackey Hemphill ’15 stole the ball came out for the second half fired were pleased with the way they played from a Camel defender and centered up,” commented Captain Anna in the second half of the season. NEW BRITAIN a pass to Captain Hannah Plappert Howard ’15. “I’m proud of how well we ’16, who hit a low bouncer into the Despite being down 2-0, the played in the second half of the sea- back of the net and put the Cardinals Camels were determined to put up son,” Plappert said. “Although our ROCKY HILL up 1-0. a fight and mount a comeback. Two record doesn’t reflect it, we were really During the first half, the minutes after Hemphill scored, the playing great hockey and competing Cardinals outshot the Camels 8-3 and Cardinals suddenly found their lead against some of the best teams in the SOUTHINGTON had seven penalty corners while the cut in half, and the momentum start- country.” Camels had only one. Despite hav- ed to shift. Five minutes later, the Although the Cardinals will be ing fewer offensive opportunities, the Camels were awarded their second losing four key players to graduation, WALLINGFORD Camels still applied pressure. With of three penalty corners in the half. Block, Howard, Hemphill, and Lilah less than 10 seconds until halftime, The opposing attacking player cen- Fones ’15, the Cards will return seven the Camels sprinted downfield after tered the pass and took a shot from starters for the 2015 season. the Cardinals turned the ball over, cre- the top of the circle that was heading “This is a very young team that ctgoodwill.org ating a two-on-one. The Camel player to the left post where another Camel has some great potential,” Howard passed to her open teammate, who waited to redirect the ball into the said. “I am bummed that my senior took a wide- open shot as the clock back of the net past Grundy. With year had to end this way, but I am ticked, but Sara Grundy ’16 made a 13 minutes remaining, the score was excited to see this team grow and be- Happy Halloween! spectacular leg save, her lone save of level at two goals apiece. Three and come a force to be reckoned with!” FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2014 THE WESLEYAN ARGUS SPORTS • 11 Women’s Soccer Ends Year with 2-1 Loss to Top-Seeded Conn By Andrew Jacobs Livi Block found twine on a long curl- crosses or through balls and overall, Staff Writer ing shot near the left post. The 2-1 each goal was a team effort. I hope next score would remain through the 90th year the leading scorer will have many The Wesleyan women’s soccer minute, and the Redbirds’ second half more goals!” team ended its season with a defeat rally came up short once again. The Although it was certainly a frus- at the hands of NESCAC rival Conn Cardinals, who trailed in shots 12-1 trating season for the Cardinals, there College. The Cardinals held the previ- at the half, played a closer game in the were a few positives to take away from ously 12-2 Camels scoreless through second half, trailing 14-7 after half- the year. The Cardinals’ lone win of the first half, but two second-half goals time. Rachel Hobert ’16 got the start in the year occurred in late September earned the nationally-ranked Camels a net for Wesleyan, keeping the Camels against Eastern Connecticut State. The 2-1 victory. The Cardinals end the sea- scoreless through the half while making team was able to enjoy its victory on son with a record of 1-12-1 overall and five saves. Meghan Hanan ’18 started home turf. The Cardinals were also 0-9-1 in NESCAC play. The Camels, the second half for the Cardinals by able to tie a big NESCAC foe, Tufts, on the other hand, finish the regular saving four of six shots on net before on September 16. season at 13-2, and 8-2 in conference being removed for Jessica Tollman ’15, Marisa Yang ’16 was the team’s play. This is the first year the Cardinals in what would end up being Tollman’s other leading scorer for the season. have failed to qualify for the NESCAC last game as a Wesleyan Cardinal. She tied for the team lead in goals with tournament since 2007, although the Sylla reflected on what proved to three, along with Sylla, and also dished season was full of close games and be a difficult season for the squad. out one assist on the year, for a com- some missed opportunities; the team “I think this season was tough, but bined seven points. Sylla finished sec- had eight one-goal losses on the year, definitely important because we learned ond on the team in scoring, with three along with three games decided by a a lot as a team about what we need to goals as well, for six points. Madeline 2-0 score. do differently moving forward,” Sylla Keane ’16 finished third on the team in Conn barraged the Wesleyan net said. “We unfortunately had a lot of points, with one goal and three assists, in the first half and held a 12-1 advan- injuries and few numbers, which made for a combined five points. tage in shots. However, the Cardinals’ everything difficult from practice to Tollman led the team in appear- back four proved strong, keeping games. I think we played well in many ances in net, appearing in 13 games multiple scoring opportunities off the games and didn’t get the outcomes we on the season and starting 12. Tollman Long Lane board. deserved some of the time.” had a goals-against average of 1.30 In the second half, the Cardinals Sylla laid out a plan for the team per game, made a total of 56 saves on came out with a vengeance. They bat- in order to improve next year. the season, and recorded one shutout. tled the Camels shot for shot, exchang- “To make the next step, I think it’s Hobert made seven appearances in Hoop House ing shots off the crossbar; each team important to look at the entire team,” net for the Cardinals and started three had multiple scoring opportunities. Sylla said. “I feel that everyone needs to games. Hobert made 32 total saves on However, it was Conn’s Grace Bilodeau step up in terms of fitness, foot skills, the season. who broke the scoreless tie, putting in and their overall game. If everyone A common trend in many of the Extravaganza! a left-footed shot off the post. Not long works hard this year and works on what team’s one-goal losses was allowing op- after, however, Wesleyan’s Sarah Sylla they need to improve, I think the team ponents to take the lead late in games. ’17 answered with a left-footed shot will really benefit next season.” On the season, the Cardinals were only Date: Saturday, November 1 high into the right corner that found Sylla also spoke about being one outscored by one goal in the first half, the back of the net. Sylla’s third goal of the team’s leaders in goals, emphasiz- by a margin of 5-4, but they were out- Location: Long Lane Farm of the season came a mere 57 seconds ing that it was always a team effort. scored 20-6 in the second half of games, after the Camels struck and tied her “I’m happy to be a leading scorer, leading the Cardinals to press for a late Time: 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. for the team lead in goals. However, but I definitely cannot give myself all goal often. If the team is looking for it was Conn who would strike again the credit,” Sylla said. “My goals came one area in which to improve, it must in the 79th minute, when the Camels’ from my teammates playing me great start with getting on the board early. Men’s Soccer Team Shuts Out Conn College to Cap Regular Season, Launches into NESCAC Postseason

By Daniel Kim pension that kept him out of the well following the goal, then Coach Staff Writer majority of last week’s match against Wheeler made some changes to Trinity and the entire game against bring in players that have been start- Ending the season on a positive Middlebury—notched three saves ing most of our games,” Hoy wrote. note, the men’s soccer team trumped in the competition against Conn “They knocked the ball around com- the Conn College Camels 1-0 on in addition to one team defensive fortably because we had the lead, but Wednesday, Oct. 29, to finish with save, marking his fifth shutout of it seemed almost too comfortably at a 6-4 NESCAC and 8-5-2 overall the year. A four-year varsity veteran, times. We adjusted at halftime and record. Playing on Jackson Field, the McConnell ended the regular season Coach Wheeler let the team know Cardinals hosted their conference with high marks: an 8-3-2 record, an that our goal was to play in our op- rivals for a match with implications 84.3 save percentage, and 0.56 goals ponents’ half, so that if we turned the in seeding for the conference playoffs per game average with 43 saves over ball over, Conn would have a much that are due to start this weekend. 1278 minutes of play. farther distance to go to attack our “We were expecting Conn to In a continuation of the prevail- goal. This helped us a lot, and we come out with tons of energy, as ing pattern that has characterized the were able to get good scoring chances they were fighting for a playoff spot, team’s season, Wesleyan outshot its in the second half while maintaining and we knew we would have to, at opponent 14-12 while keeping Conn a sense of security in our own half.” the very least, match their energy, off the scoreboard. Capitalizing on a Looking ahead, Wesleyan heads if not surpass it,” wrote Dylan Hoy free kick, Hoy led the team to victory up to Vermont this Saturday, Nov. ’17 in an email to The Argus. “It’s by scoring the game’s only goal in the 1, for a rematch against Middlebury JONAS POWELL/ASSISTANT PHOTO EDITOR always a battle when we play them, 24th minute. to kick off the NESCAC postseason. Omar Bravo ’15 settles a pass in the men’s soccer regular season but honestly this time they seemed “I believe it was Adrian The Birds head into the match as the finale against Conn College. The Cardinals won 1-0. to have a little less bite in their play. Reifsnyder [’16] who drew the foul fifth seed, while Midd is the fourth. Regardless, we had good energy and with excellent hold up play outside In last week’s meeting against the their front two. I’m sure they won’t “Those golden goals are always super pressured well, which limited their the box,” Hoy wrote. “Coach [Geoff] Panthers, Wes lost 3-1 after taking give us nearly as much trouble this exciting and to beat Amherst in such chances offensively. As we head into Wheeler told me before the game the lead in the second half. time around.” dramatic fashion was terrific. Other the playoffs, we know that it’s less that I would be in charge of set pieces “To be honest, I’m pretty hap- This weekend, it becomes a than that, I would say my favourite what our opponents do and more while I was in, and as soon as I saw py that we’re playing Middlebury,” one-game season for the Cards. The part of the season was the beginning. what we do as a team.” how far the free kick was from goal Issroff wrote. “I think that we are a playoffs leave Wes in a do-or-die situ- It’s always great getting back together “I thought it was a bit of a I knew I would be shooting it. I’ve better team and in a way, the silver ation. with all of the guys after the summer strange game actually,” wrote Captain practiced set pieces from this range lining of our loss to them [last week] “We’re excited,” Issroff wrote. and I think that we were playing with Daniel Issroff ’15 in an email to The many times, and at this point it was is that they probably go into the “We all know what we’re capable of, some real verve and swagger early on Argus. “[Conn] came out really flat, all about executing what I had prac- game expecting a bit of an easy ride. and it will require us playing at our in the season. Hopefully we can re- which was unusual for them because ticed. This was the first time I’d really We’re all very confident that we can highest level to get where we want to cover some of that as we head into they usually play with a lot of energy gotten a chance in a game to have a beat them, but as I’ve been saying the go.” the playoffs.” and they still hadn’t technically qual- shot on goal from a free kick, and the whole season, it’s going to have to be Asked to reflect on the close The winner of Wesleyan’s game ified for the playoffs. We had to try only thing on my mind was scoring.” a complete performance with lots of of the regular season, Issroff looked this weekend will take on the winner and create our own intensity. I think To hold on to the lead, the focus and lots of energy. Other than back at some of the better moments of top-seeded Tufts against eighth- we defended well; they didn’t have a Cards adjusted at halftime to main- that, we’ll be making small adjust- of the fall thus far with an eye on how ranked Conn. In the other half of lot of chances.” tain dominance for the rest of the ments to fix some of the problems the team hopes it will end. the bracket, Amherst will host Colby, Goalkeeper Emmett McConnell game. that we had with them last weekend, “Obviously Amherst was the while Bowdoin will take on the Ephs ’15—returning from a red card sus- “The group that started played particularly with the movement of highlight of the season,” he wrote. in Williamstown, Mass on Saturday. How to Be Allergy-Friendly A Letter From a Haunted Ghost Without Losing Your Edge Dear Intruders, You ruined my 126th death day evacuate my premises, I will Halloween’s right around terrifying ;) I’ve tried to remain cordial with your stupid friends, the so- report you to the Inter-Realm the corner, but the spooky 3. Hexed Amulets - your but I cannot spend the rest of my called “Ghost Hunters.” Were you Protection Department and file amount of food allergies in neighbors’ children may be afterlife in fear. I didn’t mind people raised in a barn? You can’t harassment charges. Get out. your neighborhood has got you cursed with a life of misery and hosting you for a night, but it’s just walk in here and demand that shivering like there’s a ghost in misfortune after taking these, but been FIFTEEN YEARS. You I reveal myself to you and ask me Yours literally forever, the room! What’s the trick to at least they won’t have to endure scared the spiritually linked atoms to “turn on the light” so you Casper-the-Not-So- finding a treat that won’t trigger the misery of using their Epi-pen! out of me when you’ve barged into know I’m real. Some Friendly Ghost little Joey’s IBS? Luckily, you 4. Dead Rats - gluten-free my bedroom and CLUTTERED pretty traumatizing don’t have to be a wizard to and soy-free! Also, a great way my personal space with your old things happened invent such tantalizing sweets. to fix your household rodent exercise equipment and boxes to me in my Here’s a list of allergen-free problem…just in time for of stuff that you don’t need and earthly life that goodies that your kids will think Thanksgiving! should probably throw out anyway. I’d prefer are swell — without swelling up 5. Flaming Human Feces - You drown out my screams with to keep to their throats: easy to make and fun to give out. the inane chirp of “The Voice” myself, so Plus, No tree nuts! coming from the other room. I d e m a n d i n g 1. Ice cubes - these mouth- 6. “One-Way Tickets to guess you don’t understand, but that I “make watering (literally!) sweets are Hell” covered in the blood of a my “eternal resting place” can be m y s e l f just as slimy and cold as the newborn - its time to get crafty! anywhere I so please! So pardon k n o w n ” “zombie brains” your trick-or- me for choosing to spend the is a pretty treaters are pining for, and heck, With these allergy-sensitive better half of forever in my own insensitive they only contain water! Halloween treats, your house damn home instead of a hole in and triggering 2. Needles -These little guys will still be plenty scary — just the ground! I know, how DARE request. This is your are pure metal, and their eminent not in the “ambulance” kind of I? Well, HOW DARE YOU!!! two weeks notice: if you don’t choking-hazard is deliciously way. Hillary Clinton’s Tips for a How to Defend Yourself in the Skeleton Uprising Fun-tastic Halloween to them), our campus will soon is to take one of the traditional become a battleground for these hollowed out gourds and thrust Hey there, lovelies! Today it is about talent or even drive. forces of evil. Follow my sage it onto the skeleton’s head. This we had the pleasure of sitting Help people out — and they just wisdom, and, perhaps, you may will hinder his vision and give down with politician, mother, might come to your rescue in the avoid falling victim to their cold, you an opportunity to escape. and total celeb girl crush Hillary future. [Editor’s note: You know boney clutches. ● In addition to being servants Clinton to talk about our favorite where we’ll be having lots of ● Do not adorn your homestead of the Prince of Darkness, fast-approaching holiday — “interpersonal relationships?” At with representations of the skeletons are masters of dance. Halloween. Whether you’re still the Halloween party later! Get it, W i t h skeletons’ fallen brethren; this If a skeleton challenges you to trying to think of the perfect Hillary? It’s sex. We mean sex.] All Hallow’s will provoke them and make you a dance off, do not engage him. costume or debating which party Practice forgiveness. Eve upon a target of attack. You will most certainly lose, to go to, our former Secretary of Nobody’s perfect. Forgive us, the Skeleton ● When preparing to partake in and the entire skeleton army will State is THE person to go to for all yourself, and forgive others; Uprising is the Hallow’s Eve ceremony in all laugh at you, causing you your spookiest needs. holding grudges will only hurt imminent. Upon which you accost strangers for profuse, eternal embarrassment Choose your battles. I’ve had you in the end. [Editor’s note: You the setting of the confectionaries, do not adorn before they ravish your flesh. to make a lot of tough decisions know who we’ll never forgive? All sun, Satan will yourself in robes mimicking Know that no matter how in my career, and I’ve learned those hot guys for totally making send his boned a skeleton. The skeletons will much you attempt to fend off the that what you choose to prioritize fun of our costumes! Well, I guess minions to the mistake you for one of their own Skeleton Uprising, you will never defines you as a person. [Editor’s we might forgive them if they give surface to and draft you into their army. be able to purge yourself of the note: Umm, like choosing between us some “candy.” Okay, fine, get wreak havoc on ● In the event that you find skeleton that lives inside of you. the hot guy dressed as a sexy over here, you.] our mortal realm, just as the yourself in combat with a You will live with this shame for plumber and the hot guy dressed Learn from your mistakes. prophecy foresees. Because of skeleton, remember that all of your life, until you die and as a sexy Mayor Bloomberg? It’s not the mistake that matters; Wesleyan’s close proximity to skeletons are made of bones and join the ranks of those you once Thanks but no thanks — we’ll take it’s what you learn from it. I always several skeleton districts (or are impervious to your arsenal of defended yourself from. Happy both, and STAT.] view mistakes as opportunities for “cemeteries,” as laymen refer flesh-based attacks. Your best bet festivities! Do your research. It’s betterment. Then, you can apply so important to have the facts. that new knowledge to your next A Very Dystopian Halloween Knowledge is power, and I never endeavor, and be better for it. would have gotten where I am [Editor’s note: If only we could It really was nothing no one cared whether or not first house. today without an unwavering learn from the mistakes we make like Halloween was in the the candy contained sucrose. Standing further back, commitment to the truth, not every year after too many pumpkin old days. Going through the This night, October I updated my status so that to mention a team of stellar shots! But you can’t learn from neighborhoods, taking candy, 28 (Halloween had been the Department would know fact-checkers. [Editor’s note: what you don’t remember. You feel it just wasn’t the same. I don’t moved because of temporal- we had made it to the house One fact we’ll be ignoring, us, Hil?] know if it was the policemen gerrymandering), I brought safely. Joelle held her bag up thanksverymuch? The calories in Whew! That was a lot of making sure the children were my eleven-year-old, Joelle, to the hatch in the Plexiglass all that yummy Halloween candy. advice from one of the most properly attached to their out for her first time trick- screen that had been erected Come on — it’s a holiday! We can influential women in the global leashes, or the electric light of or-treating. I was a carrot; behind the front door. Behind start dieting for next year’s skimpy political sphere. Now, only a few the artificial moon the Town she was a rabbit. It was cute the screen was an older costume on November 1, right, more weeks before we can get Board had set up, but trick-or- — and, more importantly, couple dressed like a pen Hillary?] dangerously wasted and make out treating left a bad taste in my board approved. We decided and pencil. They smiled and Beware of burning bridges. with multiple people at once in a mouth — and it wasn’t just to choose the “B” (novice dropped a can of dehydrated Success is as much about gross pile of punch-soaked ghost the mandatory carob-cube trick-or-treaters) route, apples into the rotating hatch. interpersonal relationships as cookies! candies distributed by the which started at the post Unfortunately, the can got Citizen Enjoyment Bureau. office and ran through the stuck in the hatch, and after The Ampersand is a humor page. Sarah Esocoff, Sam Raby, Katie Darr, Ian Gone were the free more modern neighborhoods a few minutes of trying to McCarthy, and Emilie Pass, Editors; Emma Singer, Queen of Layout. festivities of my reckless before finishing at of the old get it loose, I had to pull a Allergies, Sam Raby; Casper, Katie Darr; Hillary, Sarah Esocoff; Dysto- youth, the questionably Sharpening site. We passed disappointed Joelle away by pia, Nico Hartman; Skeleton Uprising, Celeste Barnaby. appropriate skeletal costumes by several other carrots and her leash. Write for the Ampersand! E-mail [email protected]. of so long ago, the fact that rabbits before coming to the