Malcolm X. Jefferson Elementary Proudly Presents A Fifth-Grade Production of A Chorus Line By Gregory T. Burns Mom’s happy Iwon’t beonstage,because shesaidMissHighnoteisnuts Miss Highnote,ourchoral director, asked metobethestagemanager. fifth-grade productionof Bethany: auditorium The Scene: Alice, Maria, Douglas, Sarah, Hillary, Henrietta, Bertha, Bethany, Rodrigo, Miss Highnote, Characters: notch performer! material beingsatirized. This selectionisatop-notchchoicefortop- would advisabletohaveagoodworkingknowledgeoftheoriginal This isaverycleverspoofonmusicaltheatreclassic;therefore,it determine justhowover-the-top orrealisticsheshouldbeportrayed. is anespeciallychallengingrole.Itwillbeuptotheperformer physically andvocallydistinct.MissHighnote,thechoraldirector within thisplay. With somanyyoungcharacters,besuretomakeeach in HumorousInterpretation. There areamyriadofcharactersfound may beperformedbyeitherafemaleormaleandshouldentered of fifth-graderstakeonthechallengingmaterial. Thiscomicplay most belovedmusicalsofall-time, humorous satirebringsarefreshinguniquenesstooneof America’s Talent Show This sequelto hours spentcreatingmagiconstageduringtherehearsalprocess. Fifth-Grade Production of A ChorusLine than stellar, across thecountryeachyearthat,forlackofanicerword,areless Inspired bythetensofthousandstheatricalproductionsmounted NOTES afifth-grader afifth-grader, portrays thecharacter, Cassie a fifth-grader, portrays thecharacter, Diana,adancer a fifth-grader a fifth-grader afifth-grader, portraysthecharacter, Zach,thedirector afifth-grader, thestagemanager DearDiary, Today wewereallassignedpartsforourupcoming, a fifth-grader, portrays thecharacter, Paul,a‘happy’ dancer a fifth-grader InandaroundtheMalcolmX.Jefferson Elementary

Malcolm X.JeffersonElementaryProudly Presents a bringsnewcharactersandstorylinestothestage. This thechoraldirectoratMalcolmX.Jefferson Elementary The 17 th Annual MalcolmX.JeffersonElementary A Chorus Line A ChorusLine . Ididn’t getanonstagerole,but paystributetothecountless , byhavingagroup , Boy: Girl: Boy: date. long. Really And Iknowhowyouare,anddon’t knowifweshould Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: with meonthis! know? This istheproblemwithwomen! And everyguyin America agrees Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: freaking outaboutit. Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: (Pause astheytrytoground themselvesinreality) Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: needs tolearnlivewithit. taller thanhewaswhenIworethem.ButI’malwaystaller!He’s short!He Girl: should havespraypaintedthemandhungfromtheceilingfan. women’s shoes,Iwouldn’t havewornthose.ButIstilldon’t thinkhe Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: about Taco Bellandattackme! Boy: ( Hypothetically. I.Don’t. Know. What. To. Do.Just. Tell. Me. Ifyoudon’t knowhowyoufeel,onearthamIsupposedto No,youmustknow. You weretheonewhosaid“maybe.” So,howdoyoufeelaboutallofthis? It’s something? And? Why? You said“maybe.”Somaybeyes? There’s that“maybe” again. Those cloudsdon’t lookgood. Yeah. Hypothetically. It’s notaboutthinkingyoutalktoomuch.It’s about Iknow, Iknow. You talked aboutthis. A lot.Fordays. A LOT. I’mnottryingtotakehisside.Look,ifIhadbeenforcedwear Well, hewasright. Those shoeswerereallyugly. Itlooksatme,watchesme.Ikeepexpectingittosaysomething Yeah, hypothetically. Look,Isaidmaybebecause...I’veknownyoufor solong.Like Stopyelling. You’re nothelping. Idon’t knowhowIfeelyet. Well, Idon’t know. Well, yes!Imean,ithastobeabigdeal,oryouwouldn’t be And that’s scary…Ithink.It’s something. It’s ahugecommitment! Ormaybeno. Look… MaybeIshouldgetmyumbrella. Ireallyhopeitdoesn’t rain. Well, Iamsogladthatwearehavingthishypothetical discussion. So,nowyouthinkItalktoomuch? They wereperfectlyfineshoes.Hejustcouldn’t standthatIwas Ha!Soyouadmitit! Well, mymother’s dogisnotnearlyasbadyourfriend,Darren. (Yelling) To himself,mocking her Okay! ) “Iknowhowyouare.” ( Beat knowing ) What is

!

heaff S race G Bridget By A Chance of Rain of Chance A Malcolm X. Jefferson Elementary Proudly Presents A Fifth-Grade Production of A Chorus Line By Gregory T. Burns

poor want something? There’s a reason you There’s Stop, stop, stop! All Stop, stop, stop! really (Beat) to go to Disneyland, correct? to go to Disneyland, Children, do any of you know do any of you Children, I’m only ten. I’m too young to in you? Didn’t it make you it make you in you? Didn’t are saying to themselves, “I hope are saying to themselves, “I hope fire fire (Beat) wanted What’s the matter, Miss Highnote? Did we the matter, What’s Miss Highnote, everyone’s already been Miss Highnote, everyone’s Shut up, Bethany! Uh-uh. Ever! A Chorus Line A (Beat) (Humming along with the music) (Addressing the company) (Addressing (Irritated) No. (Beat) The three of you were dancing…in see. Bertha, let’s Well, But, Rodrigo, you too parents told you that you were And when your it start a But didn’t All of you are missing the missing the point! You’re wanted to go to Disneyland one time, but my parents said that one time, but my parents wanted to go to Disneyland (Raising her hand) I (Beat) Dear Diary, I think Miss Highnote really likes me. Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I think Miss Highnote really likes me. Dear Diary,

Yes. sad. It made me feel (Slightly out of breath) we girls? all do. Don’t We But we love the ballet.

Bethany: row of the auditorium while she she wants all of us to sit in the front “At the and Hillary in their big number, choreographs Henrietta, Bertha, Ballet.” Miss Highnote: to the of you girls—just stop! I want the three of you to come down here front of the stage. Bertha: do something wrong? Miss Highnote: here. your tutus…and it just dawned on me. Something is not quite right idea Something is amiss. Something is making me not buy into this whole first that the three of you were really inspired to dance after seeing your ballet. Bertha: for choosing such a mature musical in the first place. Tomorrow, we’re we’re Tomorrow, place. the first in musical such a mature for choosing notes. I have to take meeting, and mandatory company having a Miss Highnote: I mean something? to really want what it means Rodrigo: go on dream vacations. stamps can’t families on food Miss Highnote: Rodrigo: Miss Highnote: make you feel? to go, how did that Rodrigo: Miss Highnote: and take your family to get a job, save your money want to get out there, Disneyland someday? Rodrigo: get a job. Miss Highnote: The dancers in point! why they sing the That’s the chorus.” I have what it takes to be cast in hope you get the part? any of you song, “I Hope I Get It.” Don’t Bethany: week, and you posted the cast list auditioned us last You cast, remember? door. yesterday outside the choir room Miss Highnote: want to I never the stage manager. were given the arduous task of being hear you speak! (In . you And I say…maybe. “Oh no! The ice is so slippery. Take me in your strong man me in your strong man Take The ice is so slippery. “Oh no! (At the same time) You’re scared of a six-pound Chihuahua? You’re It represents society— believe you. I can’t Wow. what else about me do you hate? Well, What does that mean? Oh, sure. That was a nice gesture. But what about that stupid car That was a nice gesture. But what Oh, sure. I’m sorry. of watching understand the appeal it. I just don’t I didn’t...hate You did? You damsel in distress. kid yourself. I’m not some Oh, please. Don’t And we go on a couple of other dates. And then, one night we go one night we go And then, of other dates. we go on a couple And it’ll rain? Um...I meant…maybe Well… It represents nothing! It’s just some shapes that are some colors It represents nothing! It’s I’m not the only one who thinks this. hate anything about I don’t dog has it in for me. obvious your mother’s pretty it’s Well, I keep trying to tell you. Go carts are not the same as cars. And it And are not the same as cars. I keep trying to tell you. Go carts I thought you would like it. I just...It means so much to me. get We understand your fascination with modern art! And I don’t Hypothetically I did! And it was super romantic! We held hands, held hands, We And it was super romantic! did! Hypothetically I And what about the poetry slam we went to? I sat through three And you say “yes”. And Maybe? “maybe” you’d be my girlfriend. No. No, you said weeks. I took you been going on dates for like three We’ve What?

Girl: Word! Girl: Boy: even look like anything that you see in real life! How many and don’t circle times are there just a series of green and orange lines with a huge happen. superimposed on them? It doesn’t Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: together. “Disdain in the rain on a plain in a plane.” That’s not poetry! That’s “Disdain in the rain on a plain in a plane.” together. Girl: race thing we went to? Boy: annual Go- School’s just a race. It was the Jordan Park Elementary wasn’t Go Go Carts. Girl: Boy: Girl: twenty minutes. second-graders drive in a circle for Boy: Microsoft a blue square on a red background! I could make that in it! It’s ice skating for goodness sakes! ice skating for goodness Girl: Boy: though I’m pretty sure that you were and I taught you how to skate, even I would help you. faking that you were bad at it so Girl: a high voice) water!” arms and help me conquer this frozen Boy: “forlorn” and “car horn” because you hours of people trying to rhyme put And some of those poems were just random words wanted to go. of learning for me. for of learning Girl: intellectual conversation having a very deep, are We late movie. to see a be you ask me to this film, and implications of social mores and about the your girlfriend. Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy:

heaff S race G Bridget By A Chance of Rain of Chance A Malcolm X. Jefferson Elementary Proudly Presents A Fifth-Grade Production of A Chorus Line By Gregory T. Burns you toslamyourfingers inadoorseveraltimes.Ifyoudon’t thinkyou answer. Miss Highnote: Sarah: become almostnumb!Do youunderstandthis? but inreality—she’s dyinginside.She hasso character, Diana, istellingusshetookanactingclassandfelt“Nothing,” Miss Highnote: Miss Highnote. Sarah: emotion Like you!Notthatyou’readummy! emotions. A mannequinnjust standsthereanddoesn’t do anything. they dressupindepartmentstores.It’s likeamodel—a Miss Highnote: girl—not a Sarah: Miss Highnote: that isShakespeare—ifsheactuallyauditioned—she’dgetthepart! Witch ofthe West in people cry, it’s likeshe’s constantlyauditioningforthe Wicked Wicked Bethany: about thestagepretendingthey’reballerinas. audience willunderstand make moresensetotheaudience.Ifyou’resinging“AtBuffet,” the “At theBallet,“Iwantallthreeofyoutosing—“At to cry) eaten agreatdealofsincebeingweinedoff thebottle. the proofisin Miss Highnote: Henrietta: another nutritionist. “ yourselves, girls.Justlookatyourselves. You looklikeOprah—the by alittlesomethingcalled“sweettooth.” All threeofyou.Lookat Miss Highnote: Hillary: been inspiredbysomethingeven question yourlovefortheballet.It’s justthatIthinkthethreeofyouhave Miss Highnote: Hillary: Henrietta: before” Girls,please,don’t cry. This isaneasyfix.Insteadofsinging, I’msorry, MissHighnote,I justcan’t relatetothischaracter. (Misunderstanding theinsultsbeingthrown ather) (Confused) tobeasentertaininga Ido,too! picturestheyputontabloidmagazinesto (Getting anidea) (Beat, lookingateachother, confused) DearDiary, NowthatMissHighnoteknowsshecanmake Absolutely. Iloveballet! man (Hurt andshocked) ! Sarah,Iknowyou’rea Sarah,Ihaveaquestionforyou. Are youamannequin? Well, Hillary, Ithinkthethreeofyouhavebeeninspired

(Beat) (Trying tobetactful) (Disappointed) (Trying pudding A mannequinn? The Wizard ofOz Idon’t thinkIhavetosayit,Henrietta

to helpSarah) why Sarah,foryourhomework thisweekend,Iwant —something thethreeofyouhavenodoubt theyarewitnessingthreehipposprancing Are yousayingwe’re… Okay, then. Thank youforthathonest more dummy (Embarrassed) Please,understandthatIdonot (Beat) ! And Isweartoyou,Diary, onall thanballet. Inthisscenefromthemusical, girl. ! You’d havetofindsome A mannequinnisa much We don’t understand. MissHighnote,I’ma shame emotion thatshe’s (The girlsstart fat statue Buffet herintohiring ? Thank you, —with no .” Itwill dummy (Beat)

Boy: Girl: Boy: afterwards, andit’s great. try tobefunnyandI...am stillfunny. And wegoforawalkinthe park And wehaveagoodtime. We laugh.I’mfunnyandyou You Girl: Boy: corner nearyourworkplace. Girl: much money. Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: restaurant thatthinks“bursty”isaword. Girl: and bursty…” Doodle.” And thethemesongistotuneofthatgreat American classic“Yankee Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: ( There isalotofdetailinthis“whatif”story. ButhypotheticalmeisstillnotDonald Trump! Idon’t havethat The LavishSpoon? That’s soexpensive. Oh.Okay. So... You love Thirsty’s. They bringyoucheesefriesandwearsuspenders. Alright! Sowegoto Thirsty’s... Okay. Doyouwanttogodinner? Okay. Great.So... Okay. Ijusthypotheticallyaskedyouout. Somefeministyouare. Why doIhavetoaskyouout? Why can’t youaskmeout? Okay. So,“whatif”wedated? Yeah, let’s entertainthenotionforasecond. Well, whatifwewere? Oh. ( What doyoutellthem? Oh. I’mpicky. Fine,fine.Sowegos This isonlyhypotheticalmoney. Sowegoto The LavishSpoon. Woah, woah,woah...you’retakingmeto Thirsty’s onourfirstdate? Soundslikeadate. Well, nowwegoonadate. And, hypothetically, Isayyes. Will youjustaskmealready?Hypothetically, ofcourse. Becausetheguyissupposedtoaskgirlout. Well, youwouldfirsthavetoaskmeout. Um...okay. What if? See,that“oh”worriesme. What does“oh”mean? Well, that’s thetruth. I’vebeentellingthemno. “Oh”isright. (Under hisbreath) (Talking overhim,shootinghimalook) (Interrupting) Sarcastic Beat (Sings) )You’ve beentellingthemno. ) Noway! And theskyisblue! Well, thisisjustadayfull “Cometous,we’llmakeyousmile,we’refunandcute Yeah, Idon’t reallywanttohavemyfirstdateata Ithinkweshouldgoto Thirsty’s. omewhere fordinner. Likethatcafeonthe

And it’s fun. And it’s nice.

heaff S race G Bridget By A Chance of Rain of Chance A