FREE 12/10/00 Issue no: 989

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The University of Surrey Students’ Union movesClub (commercial arm into a period of strategic review and reorganisa-of the Union) facing tion it was announced at Student Council thisan end of year deficit week (10/10/00). of £222,000. (As requested in the Following a month of discontent and uncertainty amongstmeeting a full break- the membership, Union staff and the Union Sabbaticaldown of that figure will Officers concerning the Union and more specifically its com-be displayed on the mercial services, plans regarding the future of USSU havemain Union notice been finalised. A full review, intended to consider all Unionboard from 16/10/00.) services both commercial and non-commercial, will be con-He also expressed ducted with the full support of the University. that stringent action had been taken to put This process of review and reorganisation was initiated by ain place a system to decision that the post of General Manager was no longerclosely monitor and required in its present form and thus Dennis Frost, Generalcurb, where neces- Manager of the past two and a half years, left his desk forsary, expenditure the final time last Thursday, (5/10/00). Dennis commentedwithin the organisa- before leaving, “ The correct management structure for thetion in order to ensure Students listen to Fiona’s (SUPresident) words at Student Council Students’ Union at Surrey is a key decision…I wish thethat budgets are Union every success as it takes some tough business deci-adhered to in the bar prices being one possible example, to take place in a sions.” (The full Public Announcement relating to the depar-forthcoming financial year. The Students’ Union whilstsustainable manner that will ensure all changes made can ture of Dennis Frost can be found on the main notice boardrecognising its current tenuous financial position, acknowl-be guaranteed for future generations of University of Surrey in the Students’ Union Reception area.) USSU President,edges that now is a crucial to time to refocus and strategi-students. Fiona Wareham, stated that this was “…only the first step ofcally plan for the future. a six month review and reorganisation process. “ The progress of the review will be monitored and reported In practical terms a working party will be appointed andon in Barefacts, on the Union website and on relevant notice Malcolm Hamling (USSU Finance Manager), at the Studentcharged with commencing and overseeing the review. Thisboards around the Union building.Meetings and discussion Council meeting of 10/10/00, outlined the critical financialworking party will comprise the six Sabbatical Officers of thegroups will also be publicisedin this same way. position faced by USSU at this present time with the UnionStudents’ Union, members of University senior manage- ment, an NUS representative and several independent stu-We, as the USSU Sabbatical Team, are dedicated to mak- dents. Full time USSU staff will be called upon to offer A question from floor ing your Union the advise, information and support, where necessary. best place it can pos- sibly be for you; offer- The working party will seek information from and report backing you the services, to focus groups that will be set up to discuss specific issues.atmosphere and Members of the Union Executive Committee will lead thesevalue for money you focus groups, consisting mainly of students. External organ-deserve. If you have isations will also be looked to as models for information asany questions or will the Student Survey. The working party, as part of itsqueries or simply remit, will focus on the Union holistically not departmentallywant to get involved to ensure that all areas are thoroughly examined. then please do not hesitate in coming to The aim of the review, via the working party and focussee us in the Union, groups, is to draw conclusions, based on student opinionalternatively you can that will assist in the formulation of long and short-termcontact us by email, goals for the Union organisation. Student involvement isthrough Barefacts or essential at this time in order that USSU truly is a demo-via the Union web- cratic organisation working with and for its members. Thesite. Students’ Union is committed to a reorganisation of the Union following the review. Clear guidelines will be set out Fiona answering one of the many questions that will enable the necessary restructuring, the lowering ofFW Civ Eng Build Bridges with Industry A new scholarship scheme has been announced by UniSwork for their sponsor. and the Institution Of Civil Engineers. The plan is funded by Students completing the scheme will get fast tracked for several engineering companies, which then promise toUniS will be pioneering the course together with the Institutecharted membership of the ICE. This will give them a good employ the graduating students. of Civil Engineers and eventually 25 top firms. It is hopedchance of reaching a senior management position in the pro- that other universities will also want to join. Dr Bob Griffithsfession. About thirty MEng students will embark on the five-yearwho is leading the project said “The scholarship paymentsby James Buller course next year. They will each receive around £2000 perand the links to top class companies should make our wideFor more news in brief turn to page 2 year as well as a salary when doing placement and vacationranging civil engineering courses a very attractive option.”

[email protected] a News 1-3n Green Society4, n Barearts 7 - 14n Lifestyle 16 n Sport 19-20 2 News 12/10/00 Editorial dates. ...And watch out for the second bout of freshers flu!!

Editorial Team Another week done and dusted - So what’s hap-Kevin Marston pened? Well, in Yugaslavia the reign of Slobodan Editor Editorr Milosevic has ended, UniS has topped the latest sur- Kevin Marston vey on the most employable students and the Union has had an interesting week. Deputy Editorr Luke Hickey Over the weekend barefacts had it’s first training ses- sion for new journalists and on the whole it was a Production Editorr great success with students learning basic Desk Top Andrew Thomas Publishing skills, graphic skills and writing skills. Thanks to all the people who turned up and took part. News Team If you missed training look out for further training James Buller Carlos Dunn ....News In Brief.....News In Brief.... Features Editorr Vacant UniS Is Best legally binding code of make practice, to make deal- ings more “predictable”. Music Editorr UniS has topped the latest surveys of UK universities. Owen Hazelby The University of Surrey produces the most employ-Phil Evans, principal policy adviser at the Consumers’ able students as a result of some of the best educa-Association, said this was among the “murkiest areas Arts Editorr tion in Britain, according to the statistics. of operation for the big four and it is good to see that ChrisMorton it will be cleaned up”. Surrey took first place in the ‘Best Job Prospects’ Sports Editorr League table, and offers excellent teaching in sever-The commission also suggested that without altering Dave Chapman al areas, says the Higher Education Statisticsplanning laws, new superstores should gain govern- Agency. ment approval if another branch already existed near- Marketing Team by Vacant Only 0.6% of Surrey students are seeking work 6th months after graduating, compared to 4.4% nationalNo action was called for against “loss leaders” - sell- Writers average. ing goods below cost price. Small shops claim this Emma van-Huysse puts them out of business unfairly. However it was Ali Danaby In the Guardian newspaper’s University Guide, UniSconcluded that “the options available would them- Sariqa Wagley was highlighted for teaching quality in music, bio-selves have adverse effects and would be dispropor- Dave Abbott sciences, psychology, business management stud-tionate to the problems themselves”. Owen Hazelby, ies, electrical and electronic engineering, nursing and Luke Mackenzie, civil engineering. The report has appeared to please most people. The Lucy Andrews Trade and Industry Secretary, Stephen Byers, wel- Andrew Thomas Dr Russ Clark of the careers service was delightedcomed and accepted all the recommendations. James Buller with the figures. “Employers value the skills and Luke Hickey experience of Surrey graduates which enables them The Numbers Game Chops to make a contribution from day one” he said. Tom Sugarman An Oxford professor has discovered how to get play- Libby Hurt Satellite Snaps ing cards into a random order - shuffling. The mun- & Melanie Wilberforce dane result was announced by the Nick Trefethen, Professor of Numerical Analysis, thereby prolonging Photographs from a Surrey satellite have just been the perception that mathematicians don’t inhabit the released. Among the first pictures from the 6.5kg real world ;-D Bare Facts SNAP-1 is this one of a Russian satellite, taken just 2 Union House, University Of Surrey seconds after deployment, when the spacecraft were Actually Tefethen has determined that six ‘riffle’ shuf- Guildford, Surrey, GU2 7XH about 2meters apart. The camera is smaller than a 2p fles are needed to get complete randomness. The coin, with all its components mounted on a single ‘overhand’ shuffle is much less effective he says. Tel: 01483 879275 microchip. Fax: 01483 534749 Sex email: [email protected] Supermarket Sweep: Clean Having sex makes you look younger but also seem Deadline for Publication British supermarkets do operate fairly and do not less cool according to press releases on Tuesday. Monday 12pm make excessive profits a government report has decided. However it also recommended tighter con- In a study in Edinburgh, 95 people who appeared trols on supermarkets’ planning applications and rela- young for their age were interviewed. A significant Submissions tionships with suppliers. number of them regularly indulged in energetic love- preferably on disk /emai in Word 6.0 Format, making. The researchers and authors of “Secrets of After a two-year-long investigation, the Competition the Superyoung” said that frantic sex reduces fatty Text in Arial, size 9 font Commission delivered its findings to Trade and tissue, releases natural painkillers and reduces Bare Facts is an editorially independent newspaper, published by the University of Surrey Students' Union Communications Office. Industry Secretary Stephen Byers. Originally ordered stress. The views expressed within the paper are those of individual authors, and do not necessarily to examine accusations of overcharging, the commis- represent the views of the Editor, the Editorial Board, the University of Surrey Students' Union sion actually found that supermarkets regularly sell or the University of Surrey. Within minutes however a government campaign was goods below cost price to entice customers. This publication may not be reproduced in whole or in part, stored in any form, copied or distributed, without the express permission of the pub- extolling the virtues of celibacy. £60m is being spent lisher. on telling children that it’s cool to be a virgin. “Sex: One reason for this is that the industry has changed All submissions must include the author's name and Union or Staff Number. Submission is no guarantee of publication. Are you thinking about it enough” blare the posters Anonymous and Pseudonymous articles will not be published. considerably since the inquiry started. American Bare Facts reserves the right to edit submissions. destined for UK school cloakrooms. The smaller print supermarket giant Wal-Mart took over Asda, sparking explains the joy of leaving sex until one is old enough. Printed by a price war between Tesco, Sainsbury’s, Asda, Safeway and Summerfield. Byers said this was “esti- East End Offset (TU), Bow, London, E3 3LT “This will be a straight-talking campaign which gives mated to have been worth over £1bn to the con- © USSU Communications Office 2000 teenagers the facts,” said Public Health Minister sumer.” Yvette Cooper. She felt a “hip” and “groovy” approach to the advertising campaign would do the trick. Britain Tim Mason, Marketing Director of Tesco commented has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe. “When this enquiry was started, the worry was that prices are too high, what we actually ended up being Biting Nails - A Pain In The Neck criticised for was that prices are too low.” He added Biting Nails - A Pain In The Neck “The report has confirmed the reality of the market which is the competition and the choice - people fight-Doctors in Turkey removed a 4cm long nail from the ing in a constructive way for customers which is howthroat of seven-year-old girl this week. The girl had it should be”. been complaining of pain in her throat since she was two. “It is possible that she swallowed the nail then,” Supermarkets were criticised over how they treatsaid her doctor. He removed her tonsils as well to farmers and their suppliers. The major chains and themake sure. Office of Fair Trading now have 3 months to agree a by James Buller 12/10/00 News & Emails 3

IsraelIsrael inin CrisiCrisis Amnesty for Zimbabwean Thugs Conservative leader William Hague then performed a U-turn after seven shadow cabinet ministers admitted to having The crisis in Israel has plunged to new depths after theThe Zimbabwean government have announced that theyexperimented with soft drugs. Hague said that while not Palestinian leader, Yasser Arafat, dismissed Israeli Primewill not prosecute any of the individuals behind the violencebeing against ‘zero tolerance’ he felt the matter should be Minister Ehud Barak’s extension of a deadline for him toin the run-up to June’s elections. During the unrest thou-discussed further. control Palestinian violence as just another “threat”. Baraksands were raped or beaten, with hundreds loosing their warned that he would declare that the Middle East peacehomes and possessions, through arson and looting. An esti-Meanwhile, the pressure group Liberty have announced that process is dead, unless the violence in Gaza and the Westmated thirty people were killed between January and June,they will be bringing a series of test cases under the new Bank ceases. He gave an original deadline of Monday, butincluding a number of farmers who tried to defend theirHuman Rights Act to establish whether anyone found to be has allowed “another three or four days” for his requirementproperty. The amnesty, however, does not include murder orin possession of a small amount of cannabis can be prose- to be satisfied. rape. cuted. Violence in Sri Lanka Dewar in Hospitall The United Nations Secretary-General Kofi Annan and Russian foreign minister Igor Ivanov are currently in Israel inAt least six people have been killed and many more injuredDonald Dewar, Scotland’s first minister, is on a life support an attempt to keep the peace process alive and was in ain outbreaks of violence in Sri Lanka. An overnight curfewmachine and described as “critically ill” after suffering a fall positive mood after talks with the leaders. After the meetinghas been imposed by the army following the outbreaks, that caused bleeding inside his head. The 63 year old Annan said, “I think we can rein in the situation. I think wewhich resulted from over 200 separate complaints of vote-Labour fell outside his official residence in Edinburgh and have a window of opportunity to do it. It is not going torigging in the Southern Asia country’s general election. It ishappened only two months after he returned to work follow- remain open forever. So I am optimistic.” An estimated 100seen by many that the election is a referendum on the gov-ing major heart surgery. people, almost all Arabs, and many of them children andernment’s plan to end the war with Tamil separatists. teenagers, have been killed since violence broke out a fort- Keegan Resigns night ago. The violence has overshadowed the death of the world’s first elected female prime minister, Sirimavo Bandaranaike,Kevin Keegan has quit as manager of the England football Milosevic’s Reign overr who died from a heart attack, aged 84. team after the worst possible start to the European Championships Qualifying campaign. England were beaten Slobodan Milosevic’ 11 year reign as President of Serbia 1 – 0 by Germany in the last game to be played at Wembley, (and all Yugoslavia for the last 3 years) has been ended Are You Cool? the only goal being scored by Liverpool’s Dietmar Hamann after violent protests by the people of Yugoslavia. The in the fourteenth minute. Keegan’s departure left Howard protests are as a result of believed attempts by Milosevic’sThe Government has been once again accused of wastingWilkinson in temporary command and a race to be the long- taxpayer’s money over its new £2 million campaign to tell people to rig the election, which took place two weeks ago. term successor, with suggestions that the Football The new president is Vojislav Kostunica, a 56-year-oldteenagers that ‘It’s cool to be a virgin’. Ministers hope thatAssociation should appoint a foreigner to manage England. this campaign, as part of a £60 million three-year initiative, lawyer. Other names being suggested include Bobby Robson, John will help reduce teenage pregnancies. Britain currently hasGregory, Peter Taylor and the people’s favourite, Terry one of the highest teenage pregnancy rates in Europe, with The events, which took place last Thursday, were preceded Venables. by three days of general strikes. The day itself began withover 90,000 girls under 19 becoming pregnant every year. However, the British Pregnancy Advisory Scheme has com- tens of thousands of Kostunica’s supporters lineing the Meanwhile, in Saturday’s other results the other home streets of Belgrade and ended with a gun battle and the tel-pared the project to the Millennium Dome, suggesting thatnations fared better than England, with Wales drawing at the money would be better spent of education about contra- evision station (at the time controlled by Milosevic) being home to Norway, Scotland winning away in San Marino, burned down. ception. Northern Ireland drawing at home to Denmark and the Republic of Ireland drawing away in Portugal. (Wednesday’s Kostunica has already begun the process of restoring links Drugs Scandall results not in at time of going to press). with the West, all UN sanctions have been lifted and the European Union have pledged $2 billion in aid to repair theThe Conservative Party are at loggerheads over Shadow damage done by NATO planes. He has, however, statedHome Secretary Ann Widdecombe’s speech at the Party that he will not hand Milosevic over to the InternationalConference. Widdecombe announced a ‘zero tolerance’ on Criminal Tribunal to stand trial for alleged war crimes. all illegal drugs, with a criminal record and £100 fine for all by Luke Hickey those caught in possession of cannabis for personal use.

Your Emails

Please send your emails to [email protected] To: barefacts From: Laura Tamblin Subject: Why I am a Christian Cc: Dear editor, Jesus. I don’t have to be good to get to heaven. tent with the way that the world is. He is waiting until as I would like to respond to Andy Gale’s article about why Hopefully I am a good person because I want to follow many people as possible come to realise that he is God, he is not a Christian, by saying why I am a Christian, andJesus’ example. so that more people can go to heaven. When Jesus why it is the most important thing in my life. Firstly can I returns it will be the end of the world as we know it. say that being a Christian is a lot more than going to I believe that the bible is the word of God, but it needs to church/ Christian union, praying or anything else. It is be taken in context of the time it was written and what I find it very difficult to understand how anyone can look at something that affects everything I do and who I am. Godelse was happening. The main theme of the bible is Love.the world around us and not believe in God. I am con- should be number one in my life, with nothing before him.God loves everybody, but doesn’t always like the things stantly amazed at how my body fits together and how This is very hard for me a s by nature I am stubborn andthat they do. He hates the fact that I have lied or been everything works. It is ludicrous to have a building just do what I want to do, not what God, or other people wantnasty as much as the act of murder. Jesus encounteredappear over night, with no architect or builders, and yet me to do. Just because you are born in England or go tomany people who were disliked but he showed them lovescientists say that the whole universe happened by church does not make you a Christian. I would like to and accepted them as they were. He does the same chance. now try and answer some of Andy’s questions, although Itoday. don’t claim to have all of the answers. God does however Finally can I say that even though many people see reli- God is humble. Which other God would come down to gion as a crutch I wouldn’t be here, as the person I am I think that the difference between Christianity and otherearth and live among humans? Christians worship God inwithout the “crutch”. I am a totally different person to who religions is Jesus. I believe that Jesus is the Son of Godtheir whole lives because he is the only thing worth wor-I was when God wasn’t number one in my life. If anyone in human form. God sent him to take our punishment forshipping. He made the whole universe, yet cares aboutwould like to discuss Christianity further I will be more anything wrong that we do. All the other religions have me as an individual. than happy to talk. their God far away and pray/worship as ritual. I have a personal relationship with God, which is possible throughJesus has not returned because God is not happy, or con-Laura Tamblin. 4 Features 12/10/00 Greensoc - Recycling on Campus

WHY, WHAT AND WHERE? extra staffing, but could developed as a model strategy forus seems to…) there is a more extensive recycling point in recycling on a university scale. Tesco’s car park (walk passed the main doors/cash machines and you will reach them, in the far corner on your The recycling facilities on campus at present moment areMeantime, what are we going to do with the bottles? right). Here, as well as the other usual items listed above, pretty poor, but in an establishment as large as the univer-Suggestions made at Greensoc included; sity is, recycling should be a really important issue, espe- you can also recycle your old books, and the cans are col- cially with the current waste disposal problems Surrey is fac-- Moving the bottle banks back up to Stag Hill – they werelected for charity. there all last year without any apparent problems. ing. Plastic bottles pose more of a problem as the nearest col- At the moment there are recycling bins for glass (green/blue,- If the noise really has become an issue, couldn’t the bot-lection site for those is in Woking because on the costs clear and brown) and clothing on the left as you go out oftles be left until the following morning and then taken to theinvolved in reclaiming plastic products. But, if Woking can do Chancellors main doors, which, until a week or so ago, werebins? it successfully, why can’t we? Show your support by writing to the local council and asking for plastic recycling facilities up over by Stag Hill residences. The Union collects glass- An alternative method of transporting or collecting the bot- bottles separately in dumpy bins which before the banks to be developed here – if enough people show willing, the tles so that the increased distance to the bottle banks wascouncil are far more likely to look at it seriously. were moved, were emptied into the bottle banks by a dedi-not a problem. cated team of night cleaning staff when the Union shut, be it Another grey area is food/garden waste. On campus there 11pm or 3am. Now though, because of the further distancePerhaps if there is anyone reading this that can do some-is little you can do (except finish everything on your dinner to wheel the bins and the slope involved (a dumpy bin ofthing about it, they will take the initiative and act on our sug-plate!) But if you are living off campus the council will pro- glass is not the lightest or easiest thing to move!) the glassgestions. Otherwise Greensoc plan to take on the relevantvide you with a Green Cone compost bin. To receive one, is just being thrown into the compactor to go to landfill withstaff bodies themselves. just call 01482 444499 and ask for one. My house are cur- the rest of the Union’s waste. In Residences, for the moment it is down to you. Maybe yourrently awaiting delivery… The only reason why the bins were moved was because ofwhole floor could save recyclables together and share theThe other point is that if you don’t use it, it won’t need recy- student complaints about the noise – it now seems a littlecarrying bit! cling, so try and buy products with little or no packaging, and ridiculous that the bottles are just being binned. Surely there Facilities for recycling cans, newspapers and glass at thereuse things yourself where you can. Join Greensoc in our could be another way around this issue? top of the Park and Ride car park just passed Yorkies bridgecampus recycling mission and come along to our next meet- The ultimate aim of the University’s Waste Manager is to(the town entrance to campus for anyone that doesn’ting on Thursday 12thOctober at 6:30pm in Roots. While the have an enclosed Centre of Waste Management in theknow!). There is also a clothing and textiles bin outside thewhole recycling thing might seem pointless at an individual, existing Central Stores area. This would incorporate recy-Apollo video hire shop on The Chase. This also takes cur-if we all do our bit we can make a big difference (AND cling facilities for all materials possible, and waste from thetains, shoes, blankets, and, believe it or not, teddy bears!PLEASE DON’T JUST BIN THIS ARTICLE!). whole campus would simply be transported there for sorting If you have a car, or are going that way anyway (like most ofEmma van Huysse and recycling. This clearly needs an initial investment and

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If you want to have your say in the reorganisation of the Students Union either as a memeber of a focus groups, working party or just as an individual. Then cut out the slip below and put forward your suggestions with the following details - Name - Contact Number (either tel number or email) - If you want to be in the working party - If you want to be in one of the focus groups

Once you have done this then please hand the slip into either the barefacts office or union reception. Thank You 12/10/00 Religon Feature 5 Why I am a Christian

After last weeks article ‘Why I am not a Christian’ by Andy Gale, barefacts received a phenome- WHY I AM A CHRISTIAN nal amount of responses and therefore have decided to compile this page with a small selection of the responses. Unfortunately we cannot publish all the articles due to limited space in I am a Christian because Christianity is the only way I can make sense barefacts. of life. When I reflect on why we are here, what we are here for and what happens to us when we die, I find the answers in the life and Last week’s feature article, ‘Why I am not Christian’ was a very personal account written by Andy Gale, about teachings of Jesus Christ. I believe that Jesus was with God, “in the his attempt to ‘rekindle his faith’, while struggling to accept the religion in which he had been brought up. I am mind of God” so to speak, when God through the Big Bang, initiated the writing in part in response to that article, but at the same time I want to look at the question of Christianity from whole space-time package. About thirteen billion years later, when this a slightly different angle. planet earth had formed, the process of evolution had done its work and humans beings had developed complex civilisations, something unique The whole area of what we believe and what other people believe is not one that we readily discuss with otherhappened at a critical moment in human history: Jesus was born in people. Everyone is entitled to his or her own belief, just as long as they don’t start trying to make me believeBethlehem. the same as them. Right? Well, er, maybe… But if we think for anything more than a couple of minutes about this, then some serious questions emerge. If everyone believes something different, then what is the point ofMy understanding is that as Jesus grew up he lived so closely with God, believing anything at all? We can’t all be ‘right’ can we? Why don’t I just forget it and get on with my own life?that he showed everyone for all time what God is like - at least as far as it is humanly possible to understand. He was, in a real sense, God liv- That is how many of us think about this whole subject. But that last question just doesn’t sit comfortably withing a human life. He showed us how to live, to do to others as we would me – why not forget it and get on with my own life? No, it just doesn’t make sense… there would just be nohave them do to us, to love our neighbours as ourselves. He also point. I can’t accept the idea that everything we know and experience and see is merely chance or co-inci-showed that God’s love for us doesn’t depend on what we do or who we dence. What is there to make me happy… really happy? Sure, money is great – it would be great to be ableare, it is unconditional. As a wise person once said, “There’s nothing to afford anything wouldn’t it, anything in the world? But then, how would you feel when on your day off, youwe can do to make God love us more and there’s nothing we can do to turn on your Nicam-Digital-Stereo-Widescreen-Flatscreen-Sunscreen television and see pictures of peoplemake God love us less”. being pulled from the burnt-out wreckage of the train you normally take to work? Or how would you feel when in ten years time you call your friend whose great relationship you always envied? You always thought howWhat makes Christianity so appealing to me is that Jesus of Nazareth happy you would be if only you had a partner like that – but now they’re telling you how stressful the divorcewas radical. He couldn’t stand hypocrisy and during his lifetime he proceedings are and how few hours they get to spend with their daughter… OK OK, these are not everydayturned some of the accepted ideas of the religious establishment upside examples, and it’s not as if they will happen to me, right? But how do I know… can I be certain? down. He cared about everyone, particularly the poorest members of society. He enjoyed a good party and was often seen in the company Like Andy, I was brought up in a Christian home by Christian parents. I went unquestioningly to church everyof people considered to be at the bottom of the social pile. He went week, until I was thirteen or fourteen. Then I couldn’t always be bothered, preferring to stay and watch TV,about healing people who were sick and helping others to regain their and then later, sleep off my hangover before Sunday lunch. And nothing much changed while I was still atself-esteem. He was a brilliant teacher and preacher, using stories home. drawn from everyday life that helped people from all backgrounds to understand about God. He gave the clearest possible indication of how So I was looking forward to university with its limitless alcohol and sex – that’s what Freshers do, we were told.God wants people to behave towards one another. But I soon realised that this was not the two-step route to eternal self-fulfilment that many hold it to be. So what now? To say, ‘I turned back to the faith which I once abandoned’, would be, at best, inaccurate. ButAs a scientist I believe everyone is born with a need to have a relation- gradually over the course of the next three years, with the help and support of friends, I came to realise thatship with the God who created and sustains the Universe. God gave in amongst the tradition of the church I had grown up in, was a core set of beliefs which were key to my lifesuch freedom of operation to nature and to ourselves that we all need a and which, again gradually, could give me a real hope and a foundation on which to base the rest of my life.point of reference. In nature, chance and randomness seem to me to be built into the system. Disasters can happen. Human beings have such However, there are still a number of widely held criticisms of Christianity. One major criticism, which AndyGod-given freedom of choice that although we are made to love, we can touched upon last week, is that Christians seem to believe without actually thinking about, or being able toalso hate as well. Evil and suffering have come into the world through explain, what they actually believe and why they believe it. In numerous cases, this is a valid criticism, and Iour choices, because we have behaved selfishly and arrogantly. I have hope that Christians reading these articles will be prepared to acknowledge and act upon this. come to accept that suffering is part of life and realise that God is with us in the suffering, always working to bring the best possible outcomes. However, this criticism must be held in balance with the fact that human beings with brains the size of a bagJesus showed this in his life and in his death. He was tortured and cru- of sugar cannot possibly hope to explain absolutely everything. There are professors and theologians whocified after living a blameless life, doing good for everyone, but death can explain the beliefs of Christians to a great extent, far better than I can, but even they emphasise that theredid not have ‘the last word’. is a place for faith, for believing what you cannot see. And even if scientists could ever be in unanimous agree- ment on exactly how the world was created, or how mankind developed, they would still be a long way from For me there is overwhelming evidence that, after his death, Jesus was being able to explain why. raised to life again. Because of this I believe that he was and is the Son of God. His resurrection shows that this life is not all there is. My con- How many other things do we accept without completely being able to understand them ourselves? Theviction is that I am accountable for the way I live my life and need to feel human body, for example, is bafflingly intricate and complex. Even if one day we are able to precisely explaingenuinely sorry for what I have done wrong. But because God is infi- every feature and characteristic of our bodies, we would again be left asking why it has been designed in thatnitely loving and forgiving, like the best parent I can ever imagine, I can way. How many things do we believe in without being able to see them? Love, radio waves, the wind.be released from the burden of sin that I would otherwise carry round Certainly there is a place for explaining ‘why’ and Christians admittedly stumble on this point at times. But canwith me all the time - and for eternity. And that is totally liberating. we really expect to be able to understand every detail of something before we accept and believe it? The evidence suggests that Jesus never wanted people to worship him, I have deliberately not explained what the core beliefs of Christians are. Becoming a Christian for me was nothe repeatedly said that God alone was to be worshipped and that he a sudden experience. It developed over a number of years and therefore I do not wish to try and summarisehad come to be a servant. Love and service were at the heart of his it here. However, I can quickly say what Christianity is not. It is not a list of rules and regulations, nor an expe-message - deep, sacrificial love. One of the Christian posters that rience, nor a social club. It is about actually getting to know and love God. This has been the same for themoves me greatly shows a wooden cross with the words, “I asked Jesus last two thousand years, and despite all the rules and traditions which have been brought in since then, thishow much God loves me and he stretched out his hands on the cross central relationship to God still remains the foundation for millions of Christians all over the world. and said “This much”, and then he died”. I cannot imagine a love greater than this.

Andrew Goodacre Over the years I have come to understand how the Spirit of Jesus Christ lives on in the life of the Church and in the lives of his followers. When I look at the courage, integrity and faith of people like Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa and Desmond Tutu, I am convinced of it.

Robin Harvey Anglican Chaplain

FINDINGOUTMORE

The Christian Union meets every Thursday at 7.30pm in Rushes (Library Restaurant). There are between 80 - 100 people in these meetings, so feel free to come and see what happens. (Tonight's meeting will be particularly good for people who are interested in finding out more about Christianity). Every Tuesday, out- side the lecture theatres by the accommodation office, and every Wednesday night outside the Union is a tea and coffee stall run by the CU, where you can have a free drink and get to know us a bit. Also running this term throughout the UK is a course called 'Alpha', where you can join a group of people just to discuss and learn about the basics of Christianity. Courses are being run by the CU and also by a number of churches in Guildford (email Zöe [email protected] for more details). Christian Week in the Lecture Theatres 6 My First Month & Pubs 12/10/00 My First Month Well, nearly a month has past since that manic day of mov-Vic trying desperately to give away tick- ing into UniS and what do I really think about life here so far?ets to see B*witched. I was really looking forward to moving here until I realised that I could end up living with any Tom, Dick or Harry. IBy the weekend I was exhausted but prayed that I would be living with ‘normal’ people and as ithad survived my first week and was turned out I was lucky and have some great flat mates!determined to do more than just survive When it came to Sunday evening I was determined to makemy second week. I am lucky enough to friends so dug out a strong bottle of home-made red wine,live above a very generous guy who, knocked on a few doors and we got started. Once in theone night, invited my flat mates and me Union everyone asked me the same questions..... where areto his room for free drinks. Thinking it you from? What are you studying? And where are you liv-rude to turn down such a tempting offer ing? Giving the same answers every time I then asked thewe went down expecting to see a few same questions back but never really listened to thewarm cans of Tesco value larger and answers. By the end of the night I was drunk and pennilesssome lambrini. How wrong we were! but had made lots of new friends. We were told that no-one was allowed to leave the room sober and then our On Thursday night we decided to take part in the pub quiz.eyes were drawn to what looked like What a mistake that was! Don’t get me wrong, it was a greatthe spirits section of an off license night but how the winningshop. Flavoured vodkas, tequila, team new the answers towhisky of all shapes and forms, gin in some of those questionsmany colours and as much lager as you I’ll never know. What nor-could drink! As I’m sure you can imagine no-one did leavebruises and with a couple of broken limbs but I managed to mal person knows thehis room sober although I can’t remember where we wentescape unscathed. The impression I have got from the team name of the gold medallistnext! so far (especially after the events during the pub-crawl!)is in the 1956 women’s high that it is more like alcohol training with a bit of running jump? Despite the impos-Being an adventurous person I signed up to do women’saround to make you feel less guilty about all the drink! sible questions, a greatrugby during the sports fair. Having never played rugbySounds good to me. night was had by all,before it was a bit daughnting going to my first training ses- especially watching unclesion. I was expecting to walk home covered in mud andBy Ali Danby BarefactsBarefacts PubPub CrawlCrawl PhasePhase 11

Last week the barefacts team decided to start on a Guildford Pub Crawl.So after the editorial meeting we all headed off to town to sample some of the drinking establishments wonders. Here’s what we thought

Price Guide

George Abbot: Double Vodka £1.95, Heineken (pint) £1.45, Guiness £2.60, Smirnoff Ice £2.45

The Powerhouse Double Vodka £2.60, Stella (pint) £2.30, Tetley £2.20, Smirnoff Ice £2.25

J.D. Weatherspoons Double Vodka + Red Bull £3.10, Carling £1.65, Vodka Source £1.39, Boddingtons £1.35

Watch out for Phase 2 in future Issues DaphaneDaphane && CelestCelestee

Student Council Elections Daphne & Celeste Scalarama Napster 8 Napster / Live Review 12/10/00 to Napster and download it. It only takes one person to buy the album and upload it onto Napster and then thousands of Napster Napster Inc.: Surfing Pirates?users can then have it on their computers. From here it is possible to copy these songs For those of you who don’t know, Napster isMusicians and record companies accuse itple listening to them and buying their music.onto a CD and play it in a normal CD player. one of many on-line “Peer-2-peer” musicof creating an online “den of thieves”. LastThis is a good way for a band to get startedMadonna’s recent hit, American pie, was communities who encourage the swappingDecember, the Recording Industryas it gets their sound out to the world withoutavailable through Napster for free 6 weeks of MP3 music files. Association of America, representing 18them having to pay for the distribution of thebefore the official release date in this country record labels, sued Napster for copyright vio-music. due to someone uploading an advance pro- What is an MP3? lations, seeking to shut it down and collectSome larger bands also support the compa-motion copy onto the site. Anyone who did a MP3 is short for Moving Picture Expertsmore than $100 million in damages. ny: search for Madonna would have been able Group, Layer-3 Audio. Basically it’s just aIf a person buys a CD then copyright lawsColin Greenwood of Radiohead was recent-to access this song, download it and copy it way of compressing a sound file, so that aentitle them to copy that music onto anotherly interviewed on the matter: onto a CD long before it was released. typical song would take up about 3Mb offormat (e.g. tape, MiniDisc, or even MP3) to“We have just finished a tour, we played in hard disk space which is small enough to belisten to themselves. If they let other peopleBarcelona, the next day the entire perform-But you can tell that Napster are scared easily transferable across the internet, andhave copies of these tapes, MiniDiscs orance was up on Napster and three weeksOn their website they have a link to a page Napster is one of many companies thatMP3s, they are in violation of copyright aslater when we got to play in Israel the audi-of quotes from artists supporting the site; a encourages its users to do this. soon as they listen to it. ence knew the words to all the new songs. Itlink to a page asking you to add your name was wonderful...” to the list of supporters of the site; and even How do I go about trading MP3 filesSo why are Napster doing it? All these artists say that they like it whena list of some of the record companies that across the internet through Napster? John Fanning, co-founder of the company,people trade their songs. Ben Folds: “Whenthe RIAA are representing with a note asking When you first log onto their site you have tosays that “music is for sharing … We think itpeople get excited about it, whether fromyou to write to them on Napster’s behalf say- download a programme that was written byis a good idea to bring all the sharing intohearing it on the radio or borrowing a recording that you are one of their best customers then 18 year old Shawn Fanning, one of theone place so people don’t have to lookfrom a friend, or accessing it throughyet still a Napster user. Is this a sign of a co-founders of Napster. around many different sites to find the songNapster, they buy records and come out tocompany that believes it is in the right? When you download and install the pro-they want.” shows.” gramme Napster will have a quick check ofNapster themselves, however, do not own orFred Durst, lead singer of Limp Bizkit;Are Napster pirates? your computer’s hard drive to see whatsell any music so are not in violation of copy-Madonna; Moby; Ben Folds and Dave GrohlI don’t know, and the American appeals MP3’s you have on your system and addright directly. They only store music for abouthave all recently been quoted in interviewscourt can’t make a decision and this is why those to their on-line “library”. You then havequarter of a second as their server uploadsas supporters of Napster. the legal battle has been going on for the last access to this central database of literallythe music off one computer and transfers it 12 months. The next hearing in the appeals thousands of MP3’s from all the other users.immediately onto another. However, accord-Why are the record labels and artistscourt starts on Monday so we’ll have to wait All you have to do is simply type in the nameing to Internet laws Napster can be classifiedagainst Napster? and see what comes out of this. of a song or artist and Napster will searchas an Internet Service Provider, as can anyFor the artists, music is their way of life and the database to see if anyone registered onmember of the Napster community and musttheir source of income. It costs record com-Owen Hazelby their site has that song and, if so, you will betherefore, according to those laws, immedi-panies and artists to make music and they able to download that MP3 from the otherately halt any piracy they know about andare scared that if person’s computer to your own and listen toremove the pirates from their service. people are starting it immediately without having had to pay a to trade their penny for the privilege. Why are the bands in favour of Napstermusic across the supporting it? internet then they Why have Napster caused such contro-Not everyone is against Napster. There arewon’t need to go versy? bands that actively support the company andout to the record They aren’t the only company that promotesits actions. Why? shops and buy the this sort of behaviour, but Napster has madeMany smaller bands are eager to promotealbums as they some powerful enemies in its brief existence.themselves on the site so they can get peo-will be able to go

12 bands in 11 hours, three fiercely inde- Baxendale pendent record labels, 7” singles, fanzines, and the Germany/England match in the top bar. Upon entry you wince at the scene. There are small groups of people who clear- ly buy all their clothes in the Camden market Kings X stables and see little musical future without a hefty Belle & Sebastian influence. For a group that reject current pop and dance music as bland and uninspired it’s strange they look to bands like The Chemistry Experiment to lead them onward.

TCE (who would hate me to use that abbre- viation) make disaffected noise, the bassist Undergroundhas his back to the crowd, the singer des- perately needs a comb, and the guitarist appears to be realising his teenage dreams of stardom about 15 years too late. Still, they Indie All-Dayer are soon forgotten as Kicker take to the stage. A chiming female vocal backed by requisite twee guitar strums, less challeng- ing than an Alice DJ single but pleasantthough. machine and electro vibe climaxes with the multi-vocalled singalong, “Music For Girls”. Kings X Scala none the less. Sportique pass without com- ment, perhaps because most of the crowdFootball over and DJ Downfall is having aAs a band they’re brilliant, the lead singer battle of the Bontempi keyboards with hiscrossing Jarvis Cocker lyrical wit with a have shuffled into the top bar to watch England play a truly terrible game of football.mate on stage. A lolloping drum loop and lo-stage presence as energised as any top 40 fi analogue tones for half an hour. Not verypop puppet. Colour co-ordinated in red the 7th October Tompaulin play during the second half but are actually interesting enough to investi-stimulating, certain to get them bottledother members can also sing and dance, the should they go anywhere near a real clubgirl providing a good play off of vocals. gate, big guitar sound, nice vocals, still at best Belle & Sebastian b-side materialsituation. This is merely warm up though forPossibly the only band here looking like the “big name” act, The Cuban Boys aremaking any real impact in the next year, and Cuban Boys back and there isn’t a hamster dance insounding distinctly out of place this after- sight. As a band they look nothing like younoon (with the exception of the hamster peo- would expect, all being a lot older and lessple). interesting in the flesh. But there is a Human League-esque cover of Offspring’s “SelfNow the come-down. Whistler fey their way Esteem” to raise a smile and the eightiesthrough a lacklustre performance then disco vibe comes over well enough for actu-Jacques attempt to make us feel their al dancing to take place. depression, although to be fair they’re pretty good at it. There are more bands but it’s time This is nothing, however, compared to undis-to leave, we’re hungry and the in venue puted heroes of the day Baxendale. Threerestaurant is an astronomical rip off (multiply twenty some-things pretending to play guitarthe union prices by two). and synths when in fact it’s all streaming off a backing tape. The four to the floor drumAndrew Thomas 12/10/00 Elections 9 Student Council on Tuesday saw the hustings for 4 candidates standing for Union positions. These were Kate Atkins, Emma Van-Huysse, James Wrench and David Abbott. Their manifestos areStudent Council presented here. Don’t forget that if you don’t want to vote for a partic- ular candidate you can always vote RON which is re-open nomi- nations for that position. When it comes to voting, just fol- low the link to the place where you will be asked to enter certain Elections details before you proceed. You can then select the candidates you wish to vote for. Its online voting, we’ve never tried it before, so vote and have your say. David Abbot Emma Van-Huysse Union ChairpersonEthical and Environment Officer

Hello, I'm David, a fourth year Elec Eng stu-attend and put their views across. I wouldHi – I’m Emma Van-Huysse, a 2nd yeartransport and energy usage where improve- dent. take up my seat on Central Committee andmusic student, and I’m standing for positionments to the Universities environmental use it to the best of my ability to ensure thatof Ethical and Environmental Officer. I have aimpact could be made. I would like to help In my three years at university so far, I haveStudent Council resolutions are implement-keen interest in environmental and ethicalgenerate greater awareness of these, and to been a regular attendee of Arts and Entsed, and to report back to all students on theirissues, and feel these are vital factors to con-promote action to decrease the Universities Committee, Societies Standing, and ofprogress. sider on a University, National andfootprint, while supporting and being sensi- course Student Council. I would now like the International scale. I am a committee mem-tive towards worldwide projects and cam- opportunity to put something back into theI believe that student democracy is importantber of Greensoc and was very involved inpaigns. Union: I would like you to choose me for- that is why I am standing for this post.organising last years Greenweek - the posi-I believe the Ethical and Environmental Union Chairperson. Please use your vote. tion would be a positive development of thisOfficer position has great potential, and role, and if elected my main aim would be towould do my best to put this into practice. I have plenty of experience in arranging and act as a link between students, the Union chairing meetings, starting several years ago and the University on the Ethical and when I was elected to Chair OFU. Since Environmental issues which you feel then, I have also had plenty of opportunities most strongly about. to practise my public speaking skills. On the Ethical side, I would like to help develop societies represent- I believe that Student Council has a vital role ing minority groups such as the newly to play in the life of every student, and I formed IMF society, Women’s, and would like to be a part of it. Lesbian/Gay societies. Through the Ethical and Environmental committee I If elected, I would ensure that the priority for would like to offer such societies the issues under discussion fell to the ones that support they need to get their views affect you, my fellow students, and not just heard, which may not be possible at bureaucracy. I would ensure that meetings other Union committee meetings. and individual issues were widely publicised The recent Environmental Seminar in advance, so everyone interested can identified key areas such as recycling, Kate Atkins James Wrench Campaigns OfficerUnion Chairperson

Hi! I’m Kate Atkins and am standing for theopen to any suggestions – however bizarreAs someone who has worked in the Union for position of Campaigns Officer. I graduated inthey may be – if it’s important to you, it’sthe last two years on a full and part-time June of this year in sociology and haveimportant to me. basis I feel that I am tailor-made for the posi- stayed on at Surrey to do a MSc in Social tion of Union Chair. Not only do I have a Research Methods. I am very caring, enthu- strong network of ex-colleagues, current siastic and hardworking person, characteris- employees who are both full/part-time but I tics that are ideal for this role, and am not also have strong links with the sabbatical adverse to sticking up the odd poster, some- team as friends and dedicated team mem- thing I aim to do a lot of! Having spent the bers. I have spoken to the previous chairper- past four years at Surrey I am well qualified son (Fiona Wareham – President) and am to recognise issues and concerns that are fully aware of exactly what the job entails. important to the students of this university, Not only will I be the Chairperson of Student and areas where more awareness is needed. Council but will assume the Chair at Union If elected I would devote a great deal of time Executive meetings thus enabling the and effort in not only making the position a President, who currently presides over these success but also actively encouraging sup- meetings, to vote which I feel is important as port and involvement amongst the students. it is to you, the students, who elected the In thinking about this role, issues that have President to represent your views. I have no immediately sprung to mind range from the other motive for running in this election other global, breast cancer, safe sex, to the local, than to dedicate myself to the improvement tuition fees, keeping Wednesday afternoons of the Union and the services it offers. MAKE free for sport, to the more light hearted, SURE U VOTE – FOR JAMES WRENCH. National Smile Week! Whatever the issue, the level of commitment in publicising, co- ordinating and implementing the campaign will be the same from me. I am a friendly and approachable person and will make myself 10 Star Interview 12/10/00 Ooh Stick You!!

Andrew Thomas meets Daphne & Celeste Three top twenty singles, infamous live shows, and"bitches". Celeste reads the piece like it was a bedtimeSo here's the gift horse question, "what are your plans a bizarre association with the NME. D&C have beenstory. Daphne punctuates it with "oh my god!" every sofor the future?". But D&C aren't like other bands who on every television show, played every studentoften, clearly a little surprised. Daphne, "I wonder if it'salways talk about how they're "really excited about our union, and anything that hasn't been bolted downbecause their careers are so over now they have tonew album and forthcoming single, which by the way is has seemingly been thrown at them at someattack two little girls. All power to them for their definiteout on...". No, D&C are going home, although Celeste point... opinions on us anyway, I don't remember being rude tojokes, quoting from the B*Witched interview, "I mean, them". So what do they think of B*Witched? Celeste,we are so not the most talented people, we're not even Snaking through the assault course that is backstage,"well I thought they were nice, oh well, scratch that...".close, so I guess we won't be releasing anymore sin- Daphne, Celeste, three dancers, and their managerThe pop career management training kicks in heregles!". return from Pizza Express. We all head up to the guestthough and through gritted teeth D&C totally fail to slag area and as I pull out my notebook the girls grab someoff the Irish four piece, commenting that they're, "love-The gig itself is a strange affair. After the one song sup- comfy chairs. Daphne spreads out over hers like shely girls", and that they have, "great parents"! port act featuring someone who used to be in North was watching a movie at home whilst Celeste sits a lit- And South doing what sounds like a Britney Spears b- tle more vertically. Still, D&C are well known for side D&C come on to cheering and booing. Why peo- rubbishing other bands soLimp Bizkit'sple pay money to boo a band seems hard to under- "Is this university, like ah, an alternative kinda place?",who do they like? Celeste stand. Don't you see? You've given them your money asks Celeste, "Some of them try to be, that's where youreels off what seems to be version ofand they are laughing at YOU. You don't get it, you've get people liking Placebo", adds Daphne helpfully. Wethe entire top fourty plus a 'Faith' islost the plot, spend your three pounds down the pub go over what sort of bands play at Surrey, Daphnecouple of American non- and grumble how "proper" music, with like instruments whoops when she finds out B*Witched tickets sold forentities (96 Degrees any- goodand stuff, isn't represented at Surrey. The rest of us will five times the price of theirs, "you get real good valueone?). Daphne really likes however enjoy it for what it is, light entertainment. So with us", Celeste says as Daphne catches her breath.the Dum Dums (well I guess someone had to), CelesteD&C play all three singles plus a new one called, 'Roll Daphne, "it's a pound a song with a free one thrownnarrows her scope down to, "any rap artist and hip hopCall'. They smile, they wiggle their arses, they point at in!". Celeste wants to know what the student bands areartist, except Puff Daddy and half the southern rap-the beer boy morons screaming expletives during like, Daphne can't believe there's one that sounds likepers". So if all their favourite bands are doing hiphop or'U.G.L.Y'. Daphne and Celeste rock, forever destined Limp Bizkit (Trayscrape) but has no problem with it somore alternative sounds surely they should want toto be a hundred times more "controversial" than the long as, "the singer is hot like Fred Durst". make music that's like that? Celeste, "not really, wepantomime pretenders of Slipknot et al. want to make music that sells, I want to make money", On with the questions, so she continues, "I don't think us as two teenage girls why as a pop band are D&Cyou get paidcould sell hiphop to people, I don't think they'd buy it". playing alternative venues Maybe they could do a cover of something they liked? like Feet First in Camden andmoney, they"I hate covers", states Celeste, “well, unless you can Student Unions? Celestethrow stuff,add something new to it. Limp Bizkit's version of 'Faith' exclaims, "why does every is good but there was no need for a band like A1 to do college ask us that!". Perhaps then you'Take On Me'”. Daphne disagrees, "no sorry, whatDaphne & Celeste’s because it's a good question? about their dance moves, priceless stuff! I shall Daphne continues, "basically leave!remember that for a long time". "Ow!", at this point Ideal Festival Bill we do whatever we get, we're Daphne, who's been trying to swing her chair around Performers may be dead or alive not picky, basically after Reading everyone thought itwhilst sitting on it, bashes her head into a wall. It's would be a cool thing to do. If they're going to pay usstraight out of the classroom, but at seventeen so are Daphne Day we're not going to say no". But how do they handle allthey. What about the rumours that they're actually a lot Tori Amos the heckling and missile throwing? Celeste, "you justolder than that? Celeste can see why, "I'm normally leave, I mean it's kind of cool, you get paid money, theyreally cynical when it comes to young artists, I always Ieda Franco throw stuff, then you leave, there's barely any work!",add five years to what they're age is supposed to be...", Billy Holiday Daphne, "you can just take it like a man though. It's hotbut then Daphne points out, "...but with us it's like, "no Elle Fitzgerald up there, people throw some beer so you cool off".way, they are definitely twelve", we get the opposite!". Jimmy Hendrix Celeste, "Daphne did take the change off the stage one time and collected, like a pound or something!". What about collaborations, who would they like to work with? Celeste, "I think we should do a Whitney Houston Celeste Day So was the cover of 'Schools Out' a deliberate attemptduet, she's handing them out to everyone so we might Tupac Shakur to annoy metal fans? Daphne, "um, yes, that was com-as well have one!". Daphne, "perhaps we should do Notorious BIG pletely our intention", Celeste, "we like to annoy metalsomething with B*Witched, they'd be lots of fun stuff Eminem fans". But did D&C know they'd annoyed another band,going on with that!", Celeste, "I actually like B*Witched, Jennifer Lopez namely B*Witched? With this I present the evidence,I have both albums!". last week's Bare Facts where D&C are referred to as Marvin Gaye 12/10/00 Union Events 11 12 Music Reviews 12/10/00 track that wasn’t released that long ago if I recall correctly. Apparently the track has Singlesbeen ‘remixed’, though it sounds about theSingle Of The Week same to me. It’s still an ok track, but not THE CROCKETTS – 1939 Returningworth buying again if you got it the first timeEVERCLEAR – Wonderful /Chicken vs. Macho (Blue Dog.) around. 6/10 E.C. (Capitol Records) The Crocketts are impossible to pin down, I find it quite surprising that a ‘1939 Returning’ starts gently but the chorusTHE BOHO SUB BAND - Jiggle Yoursong with such a positive title, has a hook which takes days to get out ofRoots (Mercury) and catchy and uplifting tune your head. ‘Chicken vs. Macho’ has a beau-“Open your ears and let the Boho Sub Bandcan be about how a kid feels tifully shambling rhythm, which featuresleave your feeling” with their funked up gui-when their parents are going Ashley Bird of Eurovision Fame, whiletars and frantic beats that defy all that hasthrough divorce. This is soft ‘Happy as a Bastard’, is a full on punk rockgone before them. A hybrid of guitars andand gentle alternative rock, frenzy. A very talented band who could befunky grooves that actually works. 6/10 C.H.oozing with sentiment, making well worth seeing at London’s LA2 on the Everclear seem shiny and 13th. 9/10 D.N. JAZZY M – Jazzin’ The Way You Knowhappy on the outside, but a little (Perfecto) bit twisted in the middle. 9/10 THE BEAUTIFUL SOUTH - Closer ThanThis tune struck me as just another Ibiza-D.N. Most (Mercury Records) esque dance track with no real substance to The Beautiful South seem to be one of thoseit. The ‘Cool Crowd Pleaser’ mix is slightly groups that most people own albums of, butbetter with a faster beat, but at 7 minutes itthreatening to overshadow the fast-paced don’t admit to listening to. If you do admit tosoon becomes boring due to it’s repetitive-drum ‘n’ bass sounds. This record is anSUPERSISTER - Coffee (Gut) liking them sometimes you should be quiteness. The ‘Ministry Mix’ has a similar beat toobvious choice for a single; the chorus has“I like my man like I like my coffee, hot, happy with this track, nothing special, butthe previous one but I spent the first 2 min-an unforgivably catchy rap lyric. The lack ofstrong, and sweet like toffee...”, sung to a still good to wash dishes or do chores to.utes waiting for it to start and when it didimagination on show here however mayglaring rip off of ‘It’s Raining Men’. There’s a 7/10 E.C. there was another 6 minutes of boring repet-worry fans of “New Forms”. 5/10 A.R. hint of Atomic Kitten about it but still this is, itiveness to go. The final ‘Pacha Dub’ mix is continuing their coffee analogy, weak and GURU’S JAZZMATAZZ - Streetsoulprobably the best of the lot, but I still wasn’tREGULAR FRIES feat KOOL KEITH –instantly forgettable (hah!). A Cindys-on-a- (Virgin) hugely impressed. Overall this isn’t the sortSupersonic waves (coke n smoke) (JBOmonday-tastic 2/10 A.T. The first track is rather rappy, the rest beingof tune that would get me on a dance floorLtd.) more R ‘n’ B. The best track has got to be(more likely it would convince me to go to theI seem to remember this band playing theDUKE BAYSEE - My Girl Lollipop (EMI) the third track ‘All I Said’ featuring Macybar instead), this means it will probably doUnion, and I remember disliking them then.Chupa Chups sponsor a reggae cover of the Gray, although all of the tracks sound like thewell in the clubs but it completely failed toRegular Fries seem to be a mix of everythingclassic, ‘My Boy Lollipop’, with a dodgy Puff sort of thing you hear played on Radio Oneimpress. 5/10 D.D. from guitars to wibbly, wobbly keyboards,Daddy clone in a leather waistcoat taking 20 times a day. 7/10 E.C. with ‘Kool Keith’ rapping over the top, andvocal duties. Yes, that bad. 1/10 A.T. RONI SIZE REPRASENT – Who Told Youunfortunately it’s a little bit crap. The remix MUSE - Muscle Museum (Taste Media) (Mercury) by James Dean Bradfield of Manics fame is This is a re-release of a reasonably goodRap vocals dominate this track, at timesa lot better. 4/10 D.N.

ter tracks on ‘Hi-fi’ and certainly sounds like Albumsthe Stranglers. ‘Rainbow’ is also a good solid track with catchy lyrics and a decent array ofAlbum of the Week 28 DAYS – Kid Indestructible EPsounds throughout the track. ‘Miss Teazy (Mushroom records) Weezy’ which is about an argumentativeRED SNAPPER - Our Aim Is To Not content with a number 1 album in theirfemale friend is fun and jolly and incorpo-Satisfy Red Snapper (Warp) own country, Australian quintet 28 Daysrates backward guitar solos. This album def-Red Snapper really are very good at attempt to take on the UK with their interest-initely grows on you and if you enjoyed thewhat they do, they were good back ing blend of Punk, Hip-Hop and Metal. Stranglers’ you won’t be disappointed. 6/10in 96, now with this album their This EP gives us a taster of all their styles,N.M. funky dub is highly polished. The tracks 1 and 2 (‘Sucker’ and ‘Never Give Up’ vocals are either male or female respectively) are both catchy blends of punkDJ CLUE – Backstage (Mercury Records)depending on the track, and whilst punky riffs with hip-hop style rapping andInspired by the Hard Knock Life Tour( one ofthey have guest vocalists they blend scratching. Track 3 (‘Kid Indestructible’) isthe biggest recent hip hop tours ). The cdtogether perfectly to make this one the most metal-esque on the EP but withfeatures Jay-Z, DMX, Redman, Methodsmooth laid back album. However definite punk undertones. The final trackMan, Beanie Sigel, Mya T-Boz & Capone.not all the tracks have vocals and (‘La Tune’) is basically one and a half min-The albulm features a few good songs andthose that don’t are atmospheric and these constitute some of the best and most beautiful utes of punk silliness which put me in mindone outstanding track : Mya & Jay-z’s Bestpieces. Whilst at times it strays into the background music category it can usually manage of Blink 182. So, all in all, not bad, but youof Me part 2. to drag itself back to being an engaging listen. 8/10 I.P. can’t help but think that you’ve heard itSome of the tunes seep into the R& B genre somewhere before. 7/10 D.D. and others are harsh rap, and even some“nasty” with a lady or two, to him reiteratingVine, no John Virgo”. Quite what Finley was sweet sounding love songs. Check it out forthe idea behind the title of theon when he wrote this I dread to imagine. It’s yourselves 6/10 C.H. album.(Greatest of All Time)5/10 C.H. a disappointing album especially after the HUGH CORNWELL - Hi-fi (Koch) success of ‘maverick a strike’ and will proba- Hugh Cornwell, the former Strangers’ frontLL COOL J - G.O.A.T (Mercury) THE PECADILOES – The Chi EP (Limebly not even appeal to his fans. 4/10 N.M. man has released his first album since 1997.You may, like me, have thought he was longStreet) The first track ‘Leave me Alone’ has catchygone but Mr Cool is back from the graveThe Pecs mark their return from a two-year melodies and great rocky guitar sounds butsigning up to play the hip hop game. A fewabsence with a strong four track EP. This lacks a desire to want to hear it more thanbig names are featured on his album, per-release is a clear progression from their once. You could be forgiven for thinkinghaps to give him a boost of street credibilitydebut album “Caught on Venus”. All four John Lennon is signing in the second track(Method Man and Red Man).The songs varysongs are perfectly competent if at times a ‘One Day at a time’ which is one of the bet-in lyrical content. From how LL Cool J getslittle uninspiring. 6/10 A.R.

FINLEY QUAYE - Vanguard (Epic) RecommendedMr Quaye has been in the media a lot recently mainly through his black eye from Goldie but it hasn’t made him more popular. V/A - Tinsel Town (BBC Music)This is the soundtrack to BBC 2’s half attempt at a club- His recent single ‘Spiritualized’ got in the bing centred drama, more than vaguely inspired by the success of Trainspotting and Queercharts but didn’t stay too long and it’s easy to As Folk. Thankfully this two cd set is a good deal more enjoyable than the lamentable tv see why. This album is at best melodic and series. Featuring good solid club tunes from regulars such as Fatboy Slim, Propellerheads,funky but seems rather directionless and full This weeks reviews byNigel Morris, and Moloko there are also other contributors including Manic Street Preachers and Death of inane ramblings most of the time. The first Ian Purvey, Christian Hunter, Andrew In Vegas to reflect the “characters development” during the series. The mixing is spot onsong entitled ‘Broadcast’ seems to be a dig Thomas, Emma Clarke, Owen Hazelby, and as a pre-club soundtrack this is as good as any. 8/10 A.T. at celebrities with the lines “no Dennis Wise & Denise Nicholson. with his home and away eyes” and “no David

Elections: Make Your Vote Count 12/10/00 Various 13 Leaving No Turn Unstoned This Week on This week, we bring you three pieces of top-flight media enter- tainment that are utterly uncon- the Web: nected other than the fact that we decided to screen them all in the same week. This Sunday, Richard Music sites Linklater’s cinematic felch of 70s teen America, ‘Dazed & http://www.peoplesound.com: If your taste in music goes beyond boy Confused‘. The following Monday, bands, or even girl bands, you might just find something to download on well-received thriller ‘The Usual peoplesound.com. This is one of the new breed of MP3 sites that lets Suspects‘. And at University Arts you download selected tracks, or listen to music streamed live to your Cinema on the following computer all for free. The site is well laid out, although you can be bom- Wednesday, Roberto Benigni’s barded by a lot when you first enter, you’ll soon spot the good naviga- controversial yet widely-acclaimed tion bar and there are good reviews by people. This means that instead film, ‘Life Is Beautiful‘. As a film, it’s inspired some fairlysome critics for not addressing theof trawling through hours of dross, you can go straight to something that exceptional devotion - check thisHolocaust in harsher or more real-will probably be good even though you probably won’t have heard of ‘Dazed & Confused‘deals without: http://suspects.cjb.net/ istic terms - yet I feel that this filmmost of the artists. It also means that we can search by the type of artists 70s America in much the same was not intended to be an accuratewe like… or by the kind of manner as George Lucas’Arts Cinema this week is showingreflection of the holocaust. It’s notmood we’re in. Oh yeah, if ‘American Graffiti‘ dealt with 50sRoberto Benigni’s controversialthat the atrocities are trivialized, faryou’re feeling really lazy you America. Its keen cast of generally‘Life Is Beautiful‘. The story infrom it. They don’t have to becan head straight for their unknown actors carry the movie faressence of a father’s love for hisbroadcast and explicitly shown toeditor’s choice and down- beyond the possible limitations ofson, it is in its first half the story ofmuster the same horror - the senseload chart which gives you a the script. It’s been put that the sto-the relationship between Benigni’sof dread that the audience feels aspeoplesound choice top 20, ryline of this film is light and thatmadcap waiter and a womana dark and essential undercurrenta good way to hear different the characterizations are vague orwhom he literally runs into. Someto the touching affection betweentypes of music from a range stereotypical All this becomesyears later, we find them happilythe father, son, and mother.of up and coming new artists immaterial in the face of the film,married, with a precocious son,However, any criticism that this iswho just want the exposure. however. From the cars, to theGiosu. All too suddenly, their idyll isrewriting history, that the holocaust9/10 sounds, to the people, to theshatter by the Second World War,wasn’t as bad as it seems, is sim- omnipresent fug of marijuanawhere, as Italian Jews underply indefensible. This film is, in myhttp://www.regaetrain.com: This may not be everyone’s taste but it’s smoke (author sneezes violently),Mussolini, they are transported to aopinion, very much worth seeing.a good site with lots of links to anything regae. You can listen to their this is 1976. You’d have to climbNazi death camp. The film fromSee you there, if this damnedregae radio station whilst going through the history of regae they’ve laid into a time machine to get a betterhereon depicts the father’s coura-freshers’ flu clears up... out for you, or if you’re look. It’s irresponsible, politicallygeous struggle to conceal the already a fan you can look at incorrect... and great fun. awful truth of their situation fromAnd, as a footnote, I’d like to per- the news reviews and inter- his son, by contriving an elaboratesonally apologise to the people views. There are competi- ‘The Usual Suspects‘, starringexplanation of the camp and theirwho came to see ‘Blood Simple‘ on tions and a music store if you Kevin Spacey, Gabriel Byrne, andsituation as being an excitingMonday the 2nd for the quality of want to buy anything you Pete Postlethwaite, is a noirishgame, with a big tank as a prize.the screening. The print we were liked listening to. The only thriller that has a flawless cast giv-Throughout the traumatic separa-supplied with was generally agreed thing that could do with ing a fantastic ensemble perform-tion of the mother from father andto be of the worst condition in col- improvement is the layout, ance, a torturous plot that makesson, and the slow disappearancelective memory, and an official other than that a good site for Pulp Fiction look like Jackanory,of their fellow prisoners, Guido’scomplaint has been made. enthusiast and amateur and a superb soundtrack. Very,ceaseless efforts to make life forSpeaking as projectionist for that alike. 8/10 very much worth going his son an exciting and happyscreening, I’d like to thank all the to see. Kevin Spacey, in particular,experience act as solemn testa-audience for their patience and tol-http://www.brandnewmusic.com: Another site about listening to new is superb, really playing off ofment to human endeavour. ‘Life Iserance. Cheers. s•Secretary unsigned artists, but this one has a difference. Gone are the days of the Bryan Singer’s inspired direction.Beautiful‘ has been attacked byGruntfuttocks. old point and click naviga- tion here you pull the virtu- al button up and down their selected track and stop them when you like the selection. It’s not easy to use if you haven’t used one before, but you can get used to it. I’m guessing there will be people out there who hate it but I have to say I like it and it certain- ly gives an air of originality to this genre of sites. 7/10

http://www.jockrock.org: Well a look at different Scottish music, so it isn’t all Rod Stewart, The Proclaimers and Garbage. I like this site, and it’s well used, the message board has a lot of recent postings that can be worth a read and there are plenty of other features that make this site well worth a look. Although some people won’t be a fan of the tartan they’ve used as a back- ground…8/10

http://www.twistedtunes.com: If you’re looking for something a little different this is the place to come. The juke box is free and you can download the songs too…of course if you want cd’s you have to pay for them. The layout of this site is good, clear, and very easy to use and if you’ve always been looking for “OOPS I farted again” or other songs of the same calibre you now know where to come. 9/10 14 Ents Planner 12/10/00 12/10/00 Societies 15 UKUK AwarenessAwareness NighNightt UK Awareness Night this year kicked off with the mostgiven free magazines with places to visit in London outlined English of pastimes – partaking in a cup of tea and a rich teaand took great pleasure in the mini Union-Jacks placed on biscuit. The Teaching Block was filled with English boardeach table. games and a variety of drinks and nibbles and strains of the Beatles could be heard in the background. The third room on our magical mystery tour involved ‘British Publife’. In true British style the process of getting dressed The tour through the weird and wonderful aspects of Britishup, drunk, peckish, then dancing till dawn was explained Culture began in the with the aid of some beer cans and hedex – the evening’s ‘Serious Room’ where advice was given about British trans-comedy props. port, welfare, employment and the like. But the room proved to be far from serious! Within five minutes the entire crowdWith the tour finishing in the ‘Video Room’ the audience had were playing musical chairs and dancing round the room tothe chance to experience British TV humour and drama with the dulcet tones of the Spice Girls. a viewing of ‘Fawlty Towers’, ‘Ali G’ and the wedding of Prince Charles and Princess Diana. Next came the ‘British Culture Room’ where newspapers were compared, the English system of monarchy outlinedThe night ended with a UK Pub Quiz where the students had and snippets of Shakespeare were recited. Students werea chance to mingle, munch on peanuts and win themselves free entry to Wacky Wednesday.

The event ran smoothly and fun was undoubtedly had by all. Many thanks to the Sabbs, Rodney and all at Educational Liaison, and Stadia for the funding.

Words by Lucy Andrews

Pictures by Kevin Marston

Left: One of the many themed rooms at the night Top Right: A warm up game of Musical Chairs to lighten the evening Right: A scaled down version of a British Pub quiz

Like two personalities with matching ideas, SPOOKED trodes Poetry Rowexcept we bicker as much as we concur. And think ‘this is the only way, up-river, Nothingness in Ecstasy screaming in my down-river, When reality does impose, It’s really all the same’ and I enter the dun- Being With Myselff head, sundering my thoughts, Watching the quarter to five morning show, geon, the comradeship of friends I find; Band my head on the low ceiling, In the smallness of my room For all the lonely toys that can’t sleep on only to grasp nothing, sometimes. the floor. And blink for a second; there is me, recumbent in bed, At the Nothingness in Ecstasy that’s savouring the company of my thoughts. The darkness swirls and the oil rigs drill At request my thoughts shield reality for And the plug is locked in the socket: screaming in my head, me, Laughing stupidly at the twisted corpse of Within the confines of my mind, I can’t just wrench the madness free, as my mind reaches for reason - There are mountains in my head to climb. the talking fly, there are my thoughts, roaming heedless- that guards the solace in me, Lighting cigarettes off the toaster in this ly; ‘Black holes make the galaxy spin…’ reassuring that I am never alone, And I want to kiss Patrick Moore, fireproof house I need only think and they respond, in the smallness of my room or the con- and smiling sweetly at the thought of some always, surely, absolutely. Play the xylophone on his head, fines of my mind. And say ‘cheers mate’, but I can’t see with green. only one eye, Sometimes I think aloud, yk blOOcOw tAn President of PretentIous Society and my thoughts find voice as well. As I unscrew the skullcap, apply the elec- 16 Lifestyle 12/10/00 Dr Russ of postgraduate courses know what’s happened to their for- Dr Russ mer students. Why not ask them for this information before Dear Russ If you would like to check whether a particular careeryou commit yourself? If they are reluctant to tell you, per- requires postgraduate study, individual Occupationalhaps it’s because many of their students are still job-hunting. Do you think it’s worth doing a postgraduate degree?Profiles in the Careers Service provide this information.

Dear Monica Finally, a lot of people drift into further degrees without hav-Russ Clark ing a clue what’s at the end of it. Fortunately, most directorsCareers Service I’m going to throw the ball back into your court and ask ‘do youthink it’s worth it?’ In other words, why has it come into your mind in the first place? For example, you may be attracted to the prospect of remaining a student. Or maybe you think it would give you a breathing space before decid- ing which career to follow. Perhaps you’re thinking it might improve your employment prospects, or, that you ought to stay on simply because, after all, doesn’t everyone stay on who gets a good degree?!

Only you can answer some of these questions. What I will try to do is to give you some idea of the implications for your career if you take certain courses of action. The first piece of advice I can give you is to suggest that you think about what career you’d like to follow and then work backwards.

For example, if you see yourself in a long term research career, then a PhD is a tremendous asset since it confirms your ability to carry out effective research. It also means you can compete more effectively with colleagues when promo- tion opportunities come up.

Similarly, you may be considering a career which requires more specialised knowledge than your first degree provided. Masters courses are tailor-made to meet these demands with virtually every subject from actuarial work to zoology covered in one course or another.

On the other hand, if you would like to pursue a career in say, chartered accountancy, your employer would sort out your training for you. A postgraduate degree would be quite unnecessary.

BarefactsBarefacts EditorialEditorial MeetinMeetingg 7pm Mondays in The Grant Mitchell Room in SU

JeansJeans 44 GenesGenes DaDayy Thanks for everyone’s contribution £348.60 Raised in Total! 12/10/00 Gossip & The Universe 17

Big Sister Who’s Been Caught This Weekon camera

Go first years go, set yourself free…….the backlash has started, one brave little first year took the plunge and like dominoes they have all followed suit. They have released themselves from the tirade of relationships and enjoying the cold nights cuddled up to just about anyone they fancy at the time. Should be a good night on Friday!!

Is there anyone out there with a skinhead? And are you a big lad? Did you find yourself in a fight this week? Well we have one piece of advice for you, next time you have a fight, remember to take off your pink and frilly frock!! Apart from causing the funniest fight of the year you might like a handbag next time, it may do a better job!

Rugby boys, rugby boys, the same things happen week after week. Believe it or not it is not essential or desirable that we see so many of you naked!! Still it keeps this gossip column going and its something for the girls to giggle at.

Lizard D I have been informed that you are all talk and no action, so you didn’t get laid again, never mind, but get hold of that unicorn before she slips into the night with the sexy German.

Daphne and Celeste proved a big success this week…….one bloke in par- ticular had to be held up through laughing so much, keep it up Ben the Union wouldn’t be the same without you.

Now the Ministry on the other hand had to be one of the best nights spent at the Union except perhaps for those of you who went to the Bewitched night. But CJ Mackintosh the DJ on the night was larging it with one par- ticular girl who happened to be attached to our own Phat Vibes DJ, won- der what he’ll have to say about that then? If you have any photos you wish to send into With Little Sister been and gone, it has been revealed that not everyone can go for four hours without a quick tug, isn’t that right, Lukey!! barefacts then please send them to

Keep the gossip coming on [email protected] [email protected] or pop them into the office And remember Big Sister is still watching you. Tinks and Winks in the Students’ Union Personals Vodka, Malibu, Martini’s...yeah baby Congrats Special on your first ever Tactical Chunder, Would the Cambridgeshire Rose care to tango?? To all ya knakers out there! gracefully dispatched in Murpheys, Munich. I’m sure you’ll get the sly dog back for buying the Pina Colada pitcher-butNgan Tran-Charles Khan Usher - can we be Fancy a bit of Tallaght. at 20DM how could we go wrong? Bring on the bridesmaids..in Stonehenge!?!!! Sparkie+Special tour to Nuremberg next month to join South side rules!!! Jonah in some double vodka+redbulls for 4DM!!! Who What a WEY 2 nick a bench...and take it back again!!!! needs USSU?! Prepare to ‘TC’ again Special! Who the fuck is zake? any why is he back? MY LITTLE PRINCESS, ITS SOOOO NICE WORKING Happy Birthday ‘Cheese Boy’ aka Cactus Kean love M & HWITH YOU!!! The Rusty fly is airborne, soon no s**t will be safe!!! Sparkie-stop renting dodgy german DVD’s and get to all Carrot lovers, you better watch your every move, you Actually, I’ve already registered www.my-name-is-sam-and-involved with special in some ‘TC’-ing! just dont know who is watching you!?! my-head-is-too-far- up-my-own-arse.com and www.get-a-life-you-sad- Cheers Kev for putting barefacts back up on the web andmetals and ligands are just like couples, they like to be fuckwit.com So there keeping surrey placement students worldwide INVOLVED!together in the right situation (and they dont cheat on from the ElecEng boys in Deutschland, the land of eachother!!!) Dear foamygroper, tell me your fantasies. Mine is a wan-unshaven women dering erect foamy member. Love Sheep. SCANDAL ON BLACKWATER 4!! Senior resident gives up Why does an old bird have more energy? baby sitting job! Actually, I think my last personal was a bit rude and abu- sive and there was no Why do people keep disappearing? What’s the best thing to have naked with Cornish Pasties? need for it. Please don’t use it. GINGER of course!!! Questions that need to be answered people!-AR there is a person in 2B who not only kills moths by burning Finnish economics bloke, can you bring your sexy London them on the hob she also stabs them with her utensils!! Who let the Claire out? Woof, Woof,Woof,Woof! friend next time?!!!

I didn’t sleep with you, you just wanted it to happen Do you always scare first years? JB can’t WEY to see you in that dress again!!

BEARDED BROTHER WEEK 5: the angel is not as cronically shy as you would think!!!! IMPORTANT!!! ALL FANS OF Z PLEASE CONGREGATE Drama in the Bearded Brother Household this week as one AT GATWICK 20/12/2000 0200 HRS of the housemates is discovered to be harbouring a secretlittle matt try using KY jelly supply of Razors and Shaving foam. He is duly evicted. Simon says: “Will the Lativian final year sociologist give me Beard length: 1.5 inches. what will she (AR) think of next? a M.S.O!”

Sharon has the laugh of the Irish! Nurse Jo P., watch out AMD is after you and won’t stop Hey Paul!!!! DIdn’t know you knew the Art of Seduction in until you submit to his charms German!!! TopBanana What have all the tonsilitus suffers been up to together?! “G’day Scott, G’day Scott, Say G’day to Helen...... Scott” Where’s Mike Rotch??? More toast please Dave “So who will be summoned before The Committee this Stag Hill Social Committee is up and running!!!! KEEP UR puis bien! week, will it be me i’s peeled 4 upcoming events!!! will it be you, who knows and quite frankly who cares”. SHC social committee.... Run by U... 4 U!!! Did you hear the one abut the pussy and the vegetarian sausage? BDS “Babs, is it true that you won’t be plucking Conan’s pubesHey... I c my personal got put up last wk bout the pub this week, golf.....I wonder if this will go up?? The pussy ran away! BDS don’t worry, we know why - The Hockey Boys”. 18 Notices 12/10/00

AGMS & NOTICES AGMS

Thursday 12th October Hellenic Society AGM 6PM LTG

Thursday 12th October Sonic Boom AGM 7pm Hari’s Bar

Thursday 12th October Fencing AGM 7.30pm in UniSport Main Hall

Friday 13th October Physoc AGM 1PM 7AC22

Friday 13th October Taiwanese Society AGM 6PM LTK

Friday 13th October Cypriot Society AGM 7PM LTG

Surf AGM 17th October TB19 (Time to be Confirmed)

PGA AGM 7pm Wednesday 18th October Venue to be confirmed

Thursday 19th October Afro-Caribbean Society AGM Xtreme Sports Club - SKY DIVING Main Union 6.30pm If you would like to join this semesters Sky dive Course please contact the xtreme sports club at: Friday 20th October [email protected] or 07941 134 240 asap. Closing date will be Monday 16th of October. Yoga & Meditation Society AGM Price:- £180 for first jump, training and insurance. Further jumps :- £35 approx. Time & Venue TBC

Monday 23rd October With Fudge it won’t budge!!! TAE KWON DO AGM In Studio Room (Campusport) @ 5:15pm

Monday 23rd October Scout & Guide Club AGM HAIRTEC Main Union Time To be decided 24 Madrid Road Wednesday 25th October Riding Club EGM (01483) 440414 4.30pm In Chancellors

Tuesday 31st October The Mountain Biking Club r AGM Reduced 6pm in TB23. prices for NOTICES

Ultimate Frisbee Students 12-2pm Sundays At Unisport Sports Hall Tuesday’s - Guildford Job Centre Will be visiting Union Reception on Wednesday 18th October 12-4pm Friday’s inclusive

TUITION FEES: LOCAL EDUCATION AUTHORITY ASSESSMENTS

Full-time UK & EU undergraduates who have applied to a Local Education Authority (or DfEE in the case of EU students) for a means-tested public contribution towards their tuition fees are reminded that a copy of the LEA (or DfEE) assessment notification should be sent to the University Registry. Lloyds If you have received a Local Education Authority or DfEE assessment, and Chemist have not given a copy to the Registry, please do this as soon as possible. The Registry is on the 6th floor of Senate House, open 09.00-13.00 and 14.00-17.00, Monday to Friday. Madrid The Astolat This request does not apply to those students who started their course before 1998 whose fees are paid in full by the Local Education Authority. Road RegistryOctober 2000 Apollo Video Store xNewsagent 12/10/00 Sports 19 SURREYSURREY PRIDPRIDEE

Dazzeled by a gleaming forehead UniSport USMHC 1st XI 2 - 2 Addiscombe Student Badminton The second half started sprightly as a 14-man Surrey The men's hockey 1st XI made a welcome return tobegan to run rings around the opposition. The oppo'sStudent Badminton at Surrey is enormous – so much so that we at fortress Varsity after a summer spent loving teachers,no. 8, and probably their best player took a right beat-UniSPORT have to apologise for all those who were disappointed on eating chips, babbing and strict fitness regimes. Aing in the 2nd half. First, Ivy tangled heatedly withTuesday evening, who weren’t included in the 5 week workshop or who poor season last year resulted in 'nil points' gained athim, then Conan put in what the umpire called awere unable to play during club sessions. Sorry – but we are trying to home, a record that we were keen to change. 'clumsy' challenge, sending the poor man flying.keep you involved with Badminton. Obviously Conan had heard that he had the secret to Everyone turned up on time, a surprise given theman red fire! Surrey kept battling and were unlucky to Beginners badminton workshop – Tuesday 19.30 – 20.30 state of many at the union the night before... (Conan,have a goal disallowed which would have surely killed Workshop I is full but names are being taken at the Sport Centre once again your little brother ruined you, and whythe game off. Spurred on by this, Addiscombe came reception for the next 5 week workshop starting on Tuesday were Ivy's fingers down your throat?). After anback and scored the equaliser, a shame after such a November 7th. encouraging team talk given by a drunked presidentgood performance by the boys. et al, the boys started the game well. Surrey had a Sunday Morning 10 –12 majority of the possession with great performancesOn reflection there can only be one sensible expla- Two courts have been allocated for recreational badminton while from the flighted one and the machine down the right.nation for the Surrey goals. Their keeper was obvi- the teams train on courts 1, 2 & 3. The club chair will assist during We took the lead via a short corner, buried in the bot-ously not wearing the correct equipment. When faced the morning. tom corner by a man who should never leave his ownby a shiny forehead (and soon to be whole head) of half. A fluke the whole team thought, not surprising,such intensity clearly sunglasses were necessary. Recreational Badminton (Students) one goal in three years is no impressive record.Being blinded can be the only reasoning for T. Courts can be booked at the Sport Centre free of charge on pro- Addiscombe came back hard and capitalised onKemp's goals. It's certainly not his flair in front of goal! duction of a UniSPORT Card or a Sports & Classes Card. Please another short corner despite the best efforts of The contact other players for a game from the list on the Badminton Beak. 1-1 and the game was anyones, Surrey winby Le president de camp. Clubs Board in the Students Union. another short corner and Kemp only goes and pops(No bias in this report - honestly) another one in, something was clearly the matter with Addiscombe's keeper. Pole Walking – Nordic Walking

New to Britain, new to Surrey and new to UniSPORT Who Wants To Be An England Manager? Come and join in a lunch time group who meet at Senate House Entrance on Tuesdays at 13.10, to enjoy walking around the campus, ONE VACANCY FOR ENGLAND MANAGER the lake, grass and paths with walking poles. The poles are provided – all that is required are sensible walking shoes and a sense of humour. JOB PROFILE: Must have following qualities Nordic walking releases muscular tension and pain in the neck and - Patience, and high levels of tolerance when dealing with the consequences of the job. (I.e. loosing!) shoulder region, you can burn 400 calories an hour (but you may enjoy - Must have good motivational skills, tactical skills (anything other than 4,4,2 most appreciated) to walk more slowly!). It does not aggravate joints and its suitable for all - Most importantly be able to work fast (seeing as next World Cup qualifying match is in 5 months time andages and sizes. We hope to see you for a half hour walk! England need to win!)

So who is in the running, to fill Kevin Keegan's shoes

PETER TAYLOR Who Is He?- Ex-manager of England's under 21 and Gillingham by Employed? -2 months into managing Leicester City Tactics-excellent record for the under 21's but inexperienced when it

comes to the worlds best. Has good motivational skills and is quite tactically aware. RULING:Very strong possibility if he is willing to leave Leicester

TERRY VENABLES Who is he? -The people's choice! Employed? - TV pundit Tactics -Led England to quarter finals of Euro 96 therefore tactful Has excellent managing and motivational skills, however has not done so well after leaving as England's coach RULING:Strong possibility if the F.A are willing to take him back on

BRYAN ROBSON Who is he? / Employed? - Middlesborough's present manager Tactics -When it comes to transfers, the man is completely tactless (but that would not be a problem in this job). Not much of a motivator and judging by Middlesborough's performance not very tactically aware. RULING:Okay but only if were desperate!

OTHER OPTIONS Arsene Wenger -Excellent record need I say anymore. However proba- bly unwilling to leave Highbury Road

Marcello Lippi (picture right) - Ex Inter manager and took Juventus to win 3 Italian League Titles. Currently unemployed and also willing to take on England

Sariqa Wagley SURRESURREYYPRIDPRIDEE

X1 UNBEATEN THEHOGSBACK

University of Surrey 1stXI 3 Mountain Walking Club Day Walk Royal Holloway Old Boys 0 Hello again! The First Team continued their unbeaten start to the season and their 100% Saturday This Sunday the Mountain Walking Club record with a convincing win against a physical Holloway side. In difficult conditions went on a short walk around the Surrey managed to play some good quality football, exposing the opposition’s lack ofHogsback and surrounding area (includ- mobility. ing Ye Olde Ship Inn!). We were pleased In a tight first half chances were few and far between, though it was the home side’s to see so many people turn up, and we two wingers, Dom Walker and Gaz Batty, who were invariably involved in anything enjoyed the good weather. Anyone is Surrey could create. as the half wore on a superb run and cross from Batty resulted welcome to join us on any of these walks; in Lee Turner missing a glorious chance to open the scoring. Unfortunately Simone e-mail [email protected] to Pietri had to leave the field injured just before half-time but utility man Stve Cattbe kept up to date with our planned excur- stepped in to sure up an already formidably strong defence. Despite the deadlock sions. You can also find out what’s hap- remaining through the opening 45 minutes it was Surrey who looked the stronger pening by looking up the website by fol- side. Mountain Walking club says HI lowing the links from the Student’s Union The second half continued in much the same vein with the First Team having far more Sports Pages. of the possession. The pressure finally told as a well worked corner saw Walker cen- tre for skipper Sam Nourizadeh to head home and break the Holloway resistance. The away side continued their tactics of kicking as many Surrey players up in the airAs promised last week, here are some photos from the trip. as possible, but the fleet-footed Turner foiled their plans; he was too quick for them Mountain Walking club decide to have an unexpected Coffee stop just minutes later as he cracked home his seventh for the season. Nourizadeh At our weekly meeting on wrapped up victory with a well taken second for himself and third for the team as the Tuesday lunchtime, 1pm in First’s consolidated their position at the top of the Surrey Intermediate Premier the Teaching Block foyer, we League. will be planning the trip at the MOM - Walker BOM - Gurtin end of week 8 (October 27 – 29), and hopefully some more day walks. We will also Football Definitions for Yanks plan another social event, if you wish to become involved No1 - The Bicycle KickSometimes referred to as the “bicycle” by ill-informed in any of these, please come American Football fans, the bicycle kick involves the player athletically volleying the to the meeting. ball with his back to goal, performing a scissor-kick while suspended mid-air before landing comfortably and seeing the ball nestling in the bottom corner of the net… something an American Football player could only dream of.