Volume 21 Issue 6 November 17, 2010

STUDENT EXCHANGE INTERNET TRENDS POETRY OF GAMING Mario enjoys the green, rolling Mario, decent plumber and good Mario is much deeper than he hills and lollipop oaks of England. samaritan, gets his meme on. looks: Mario likes poetry. Camosun’s Student Voice Since 1990 CAMPUS—5 LIFE—7 ARTS—13 The art of being funny page 10 ro Alex H a  VIEWS November 17, 2010 Camosun customer service fails Nexus Editorial A I

Erin Ball ledgeable faculty and quality pro- T

Staff writer grams. It’s also known as a good I CA SS E

A company’s most vital assets place to work. But sometimes staff J Next publication: December 1, 2010 are its customers. Similarly, a members forget that the student is Deadline: noon November 24, 2010 college’s most vital assets are its both their customer and the reason students. why they have a job. Address: 3100 Foul Bay Rd., Victoria, BC, But, judging by the customer Everyone has bad days, but V8P 5J2 service on campus, some staff mem- some staff have been known to take Location: Lansdowne Richmond House 201 bers at the college don’t think of stu- their bad days out on unsuspecting Phone: 250-370-3591 dents that way. Sometimes it even students. Email: [email protected] feels like they think that students are Consider the story of one pro- Website: nexusnewspaper.com somehow less important portions of spective student who was on a Publisher: Nexus Publishing Society the population that doesn’t deserve waitlist to get into a program at to be treated with respect by those Camosun. A few days after school NEXUS PUBLISHING SOCIETY providing a service. had started, the program had some STUDENT BOARD MEMBERS seats open up. The admissions of- Luke Holland ficer called the prospective student Adam Holroyd and, when she didn’t answer, didn’t Emily Laing Sometimes staff leave a message with the person who Jina Mousseau members forget that picked up the phone, and instead Darin Steinkey called the next person on the list. Marty Taillon the student is both It’s understandable that if class- MANAGING EDITOR their customer and the es have already started and seats Jason Schreurs reason why they have open up that the program would ASSISTANT/LAYOUT EDITOR want to fill them immediately, and Greg Pratt a job. the admissions office staff doesn’t waste the staff’s time, and that my time” or indicate that they are STUDENT EDITOR have time to wait for a person to although many students say they too busy to deal with students, it’s Erin Ball call back. want to be on the waitlist, they often just bad customer service. STAFF WRITERS Good customer service is valued But at least a message should change their mind. The email read If the staff member isn’t willing Renée Andor and expected in our culture. As be left explaining that, and the more like a lecture to a child rather to take the time to communicate Emily Laing students who pay large amounts opportunity for the prospective than a professional and courteous to an anxious student, in the form Amanda Richardson of money to attend college and student to call back, just in case response. of leaving a brief message regard- StAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS often take on considerable debt, there’s still a spot. Although the admissions officer less of whether or not they will be Alex Haro we should be thought of as valuable The prospective student, who apologized for not being able to accepted into a program, it’s not Amanda Richardson customers of the college. wants to get into the program as offer a seat to the future student, it good policy. ADVERTISING SALES We are paying a fee (tuition) for soon as possible, was troubled that was still an unprofessional way of Employing communication in a Jason Schreurs a service (education). If there was a no communication was attempted explaining the policy. This student is polite and professional manner is a 250‑370-3593 store where customers were drop- and emailed the admissions of- Campus Plus (national) not a child; she has paid her deposit, form of good customer service. Stu- ping the same amount of money 1-800-265-5372 ficer with questions regarding the has been accepted to the program, dents, as customers, deserve good that student drop on tuition, you waitlist policy. and deserves to be treated in a cour- service from Camosun College. DISTRIBUTION can bet that those customers would She received an email back ex- teous manner. Emily Laing What do you think? be treated like royalty. plaining that their policy is not to Nicolle Rushton When service providers, such as [email protected] Camosun is known for its know- leave a message, because it would college staff, use phrases like “waste or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. CONTRIBUTORS Renée Andor Erin Ball Clayton Basi Open Space accepts submissions from Camosun students. Submissions to Open Space should be Jenna Cotton Open Space 400 words or less. Responses to previous articles in Nexus should be 250 words or less. Alicia Gilmour Email submissions to [email protected] and include your name and student number. Alex Haro Luke Holland Adam Holroyd Naomi Kavka Photo radar techniques not helping anyone Emily Laing Carol-Lynne Michaels Landon Thomas Roadblocks catch drunk or ers are simply not prepared to drive ance premiums; the money ICBC Jina Mousseau Contributing writer stoned drivers every single time. on Victoria’s highways. gets goes into expensive television Shawn O’Hara Photo radar didn’t work, so why Drunk drivers are the ones who cause New drivers who are more com- commercials telling people to use Ashley O’Neill would anyone even consider bring- accidents that ruin peoples’ lives fortable and confident in their cars caution at intersections. Pam Oliver Alex Pask ing it back? Accidents are caused and raise insurance premiums. will fare better on the roads and be Admittedly, there’s no valid Alli Pickard by more than just speed. They are New drivers can cause acci- involved in fewer accidents. reason for speeding; however, the Amanda Richardson caused by, to name a few examples, dents, but the insurance compan- Teaching the newest genera- drivers doing 90 kilometres an hour Tyler Rowe texting drivers, inexperienced driv- ies already charge them high rates tion of drivers how to handle their instead of 80 are much less danger- Jason Saliani ers, and drunk drivers. before they make mistakes. Instead vehicle in a variety of situations is ous than drivers that are texting, Erin Sanderson Going 10 kilometres over the of more radar traps, I propose stiffer a more proactive idea than handing drunk, stoned, or even driving 40 Ed Sum speed limit is probably not the main driving tests with more highway out tickets to people who were prob- kilometres an hour on the Pat Bay Shea Swenson Jessica Tai reason why insurance companies testing. ably trying to make up lost time after Highway. Landon Thomas raise premiums. How about instead Instead of spending two minutes being stuck behind someone who Photo radar doesn’t catch these Jordan Venoit of photo radar, we start with more on the highway, have the new driver didn’t know how to merge. more dangerous drivers; that’s Dylan Wilks police roadblocks, which have been spend some quality time on the Pat The money from speeding tick- why photo radar should be out and All editorial content appearing in Nexus is property of the proven to work. Bay or Highway 1. Many new driv- ets doesn’t go to reducing insur- increased policing be in. Nexus Publishing Society. Stories, photographs, and artwork contained herein cannot be reproduced without written permis- sion of the Nexus Publishing Society. The views and opinions expressed herein are those of the authors, not of Nexus. Nexus Calling out Ball has no official ties to the administration of Camosun College. with strangers is probably healthy, One copy of Nexus is available per issue, per person. too.” Nexus is printed on recycled paper. I’m writing in regard TEXTBACK Nexus is a member of Canadian University Press. Letters to Down with the Hipsters, written by Erin Ball (Nov. Tell us what you think. Send a “Beer intoxicates. I prefer the Send a letter Speak Nexus prints letters that are 250 words or less in response to 3 issue). text to 604–223–0076. simplicity of such a statement at previous stories. Nexus reserves the right to refuse publica- such a moment.” tion of letters. Letters must include full name and student If you replaced the word “hip- number (not printed). Nexus accepts all letters by email to [email protected] up! ster” with any culture, ethnicity, or “Hipsters suck! Great article.” sexual orientation it would be hate “Keep your distance, Chewie, Editorial meetings but don’t look like you’re trying to Come out to our weekly Nexus editorial meetings, where speech. Ball says that “their whole “Hipsters are just ugly people all Camosun students can get involved in their student who still get laid.” keep your distance. I don’t know. newspaper. Meetings take place every Tuesday at 11:30 am look just invites someone to punch in the Nexus office, Richmond House 201, Lansdowne. Call them in the face.” Really? Re-read- Fly casual.” 250-370-3591 or email [email protected] for more information. Did you read something ing this article, I could identify no “Bryan Skinner on DSLRs: you didn’t like in Nexus? point other than to ridicule a visible What an elitist. He has no idea “Luke Holland’s column is like the sound of a flaccid penis Help build This is YOUR student newspaper— segment of the student body for what’s he’s talking about. DSLRs tell us what you want to see covered, their style of dress and facial hair. have come miles and are a great wanking.” our team or come write for us yourself. Ball owes the school commun- equalizer in film.” Nexus needs student volunteers 250-370-3591 ity an apology for this ill-conceived Nexus reserves the right to edit Richmond House 201, attack piece. “Jaws gives me nightmares.” or exclude submissions for any rea- 250-370-3591 Lansdowne Campus [email protected] [email protected] Blake McStravick son. Discriminatory or libelous texts nexusnewspaper.com nexusnewspaper.com Former Camosun student “Avoiding the urge to make out will not be printed. [email protected] NEWS  NEWS BRIEFS Camosun suffers maintenance shortage by ERIN BALL

Emily Laing Interurban, has noticed a shortage ro Staff writer in custodians for years now, and CCSS prepares to lex ha Camosun may be messy for a doesn’t think physical resources a give out Christmas while as the campuses experience is making an appropriate effort to hampers a massive shortage in maintenance cover absentees. and janitorial staff. “When they’re sick I don’t see The holiday season can be rough for those with limited The college’s physical resources any coverage; all I see is someone funds, so the Camosun College department, in charge of keeping the running down the hall and emptying Student Society (CCSS) has campus clean, among other things, garbage cans maybe once a day,” embraced the Christmas spirit has taken a hit in staff as nearly 40 says Lambeth. and has started preparing for percent is out on sick leave. this year’s batch of Christmas “I’ve noticed an increasing num- hampers. Christmas hampers ber of toilets that are out of order “All I see is someone consist of non-perishable food in the last while,” says Lansdowne items, toiletries, and Christmas- student Algebra Young. running down the hall y goodies like candy canes and Associate director of physical and emptying garbage oranges. The hampers are for resources Ian Tol is aware of the students in need of some help concerns and strongly encour- cans maybe once a filling their kitchen cupboards ages students, staff, and faculty during the festive season. The day.” Garbage has been sitting on campus for unknown periods of time. to notify the department with any number of hampers has increased comments. Meghan Lambeth While physical resources scram- to deal with, but just minor strains by nearly double this year, thanks “The staff shortages have put camosun college bles to hire relief staff, Tol explains in the workload. to a generous donation from pressure on our system,” says Tol. that hiring qualified staff isn’t al- “There’s been some changes the members of CUPE 2081 at “We are trying our best to fill these ways straightforward. within our facility that impacts Camosun College. Half of the positions, but in the meantime we Lambeth understands the cus- “When you’re down this many our workload,” says Nunn. “For hampers will be going to individ- are trying to hire on temporary staff todian shortage has presented chal- staff, it has an immediate impact example, the new fixed seating in ual students and half to students to fill the gaps.” lenges for the college, but says her on us responding to issues and the Fisher Building requires us to with families to feed. Students Students and faculty have ex- department needs thorough facility performing the work quickly,” says spend more time cleaning around looking for the family hampers must pre-register, and students pressed concerns that maintenance maintenance at both campuses. Tol. “The hiring process hasn’t been the seats, where before we would who want an individual hamper issues around campus are being “We are a full service-oriented easy. It’s been hard to find people drive an auto scrubber, but we try can either pre-register or pick placed on the backburner and aren’t facility and it’s frustrating when with the required qualifications.” our best to adjust.” one up on a first-come-first-serve being recognized as a priority. people are contacting me when Mike Nunn, Camosun’s super- What do you think? basis. All of the hampers will be Meghan Lambeth, manager of washrooms are dirty or garbages visor of building operations, claims [email protected] available the last week of school, fitness facilities at Lansdowne and are full,” she says. there haven’t been any drastic issues or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. but pick one up quickly: if they aren’t picked up within 24 hours, it goes to the next person on the Ralph the campus seagull continues scrap hunt list. Local gym owner Alicia Gilmour of shipping/receiving. r a finalist in video Contributing writer “Seagulls come around because competition He has the stature of a pelican, of the ice that gets dumped back A local Victoria entrepreneur a beak like a parrot, and the glare of li c i a gil m o u

here,” says Nicholas. a a vulture. He’s the campus seagull, Burger says she has seen Ralph and former Camosun student has been selected as a finalist and he can be found hanging around rolling in the ice during the hotter for the People’s Choice award the back of the cafeteria, looking days of summer. in the Canadian Youth Business for scraps. Although a very cocky seagull Foundation’s Chairman Awards. Donna Burger, Camosun’s dir- who has been known to dive-bomb, Jessica Moulson, who owns ector of food and catering, is familiar no staff member has ever been Vibes Fitness on Fort Street, has with the seagull; when asked about harmed by him. entered a video to win the award it, she reveals his name—Ralph. and a prize worth $5,000. Vibes Ralph has been working in Fitness is a specialized gym that the area since at least 2008, when “We’re all guilty of offers low impact 15-minute Burger started. Burger says they see feeding him.” workouts that are the equivalent Ralph just about every day. of 60 minutes of conventional “We’re all guilty of feeding donna burger strength training. Moulson, who him,” says Burger. aramark was in the professional golf man- Burger says the bird is kind of Ralph, Camosun’s resident seagull, scopes out the campus scene. agement program at Interurban, a pet to the staff, but adds that she Ball says Ralph comes around the peace of mind of unsuspecting will also have a chance of winning does encourage those feeding him Cafeteria staffperson Matt Ball during the lunch hour and paces picnickers, it’s important to remem- the National Best Business to be cautious of what scraps they said he’s “not afraid” of the bird. back and forth at the back door ber that these city birds don’t need Award that comes with $30,000 throw. Although Ball has seen Ralph get looking for scraps, but he’s not to any extra help finding a meal. in prizes. To check out all the The ice that gets dumped from too close while he was eating lunch, be feared. videos in contention and to cast a What do you think? vote, go to cybf.ca/awards/2010/ the salad bar is one problem, ac- he says that Ralph is mostly the Ralph is a senior to the campus, [email protected] videos.php. cording to Ed Nicholas, supervisor strong, silent type. but for his species’ protection and or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. ICBC video contest makes drivers What’s your least favourite word and why? By Jina Mousseau do a 180 ICBC has jumped on the social media bandwagon and created a video contest aimed at reducing fatal car accidents among young people in BC. The contest is called the 180 short-film contest, and they’re looking for a compelling video that will make drivers do a “180” and change bad driving habits. Filmmakers must be 19–25 years old and films must be either about speeding, distracted driving, or impaired driving. The winner of each category Chris Windels Edward Lai Patrick Verhagen Algebra Young Emily Stevens will receive a prize package that includes an HD camcorder and “‘Stoked,’ because there are “‘Monday.’ It’s just an “‘Moist,’ because it’s a “‘Bequeath,’ because it “‘Casserole.’ It sounds like tripod, a Mac desktop computer, better words to say you’re annoying day. You have to nasty word. It implies doesn’t fulfill all of my something at its worst— and Final Cut Studio software. excited. It seems more go to school, can’t sleep in.” several disgusting things. phonetic desires, and you’re mooshy, gooey, slimy, There are also some sweet prizes literal when people say A lot of good things are never quite sure if it’s an ‘ff’ overcooked food—all put for runners-up and finalists.T he it—you’re not a stove or a moist, like cake, but as a or a ‘th’ sound.” together for you to eat, contest ends December 31. To see fire, you can’t be stoked!” word I don’t like the way it when it already looks the videos visit the YouTube site sounds as it comes out of like the contents of your my mouth.” stomach.” at youtube.com/180filmcontest.  CAMPUS November 17, 2010 NEWS BRIEFS Camosun takes the gold for co-op in BC by ERIN BALL Renée Andor at Eightfold Logic, Williams made a “It ties into one of the things I

Staff writer strong impression at her job there by really like about Camosun—every- nd or Camosun students A Camosun student recently asking lots of questions and having body really cares,” says Williams. n ée A vote for teaching e took home the provincial Co-op a positive attitude; Caws can’t say “It isn’t like some universities, how R excellence Student of the Year Award, mak- enough good things about her. staff just deal with thousands and Everybody, now: Camosun ing it the third win in a row for the “She fit right in,” says Caws. thousands of students; here it’s nursing instructor Paula Littlejohn college. “We have her picture up here in our really apparent that people care.” deserves a round of applause. Computer systems technology coffee room. We all miss her.” Camosun has strong co-op stu- For the first time in its history, grad Katherine Williams won the dents—in the two years before Wil- Camosun recently gave its award for her co-op at Eightfold liams’ victory, both winners were students the opportunity to Logic in Victoria. Besides the hon- “Camosun isn’t like from Camosun. Jennifer LeMercier nominate their instructors for an our of being dubbed the best co-op from the environmental technol- award that recognizes dedica- student in BC at a college level, she some universities, how ogy program won in 2008, and the tion and hard work; Littlejohn also received $1,000. staff just deal with 2007 winner was Kevin Ginley, who is the first-ever recipient of this Williams cleaned up shop in the was in the applied communication award. Students could vote for co-op department. She received an thousands and program. Ginley also won at the their favorite teacher up until honourable mention at the national thousands of students; national level. October 31 for the Student Choice level for co-op awards, and was also Gloria Darroch, Camosun’s Award in Teaching Excellence. given $500 for the Yvonne Thomp- here it’s really director of cooperative education Littlejohn will be presented son Page Co-op Student of the Year apparent that people and student employment, says the Award winner Katherine Williams. with the award during Camosun award at Camosun. Williams says credit goes to the students first and for the national Best Co-op Student Celebrates, which is Camosun’s she laughed when she found out she care.” foremost, but strong programs and Award shortly, and encourages employee recognition program, won because she was so surprised, Katherine Camosun’s hands-on approach to students to ask their co-op repre- on November 18. but thought it was “pretty sweet,” Williams teaching also contribute to students’ sentatives about it. Anarchist bookstore too. She says she got “razzed” by Camosun student success. She says not many students her friends because she had so “One of the strengths of col- apply for these awards, and raided by police many wins. lege is that you get people that are thinks Camosun students have On November 5, Victoria “All my buddies were like, ‘Oh, Williams says she highly recom- doers,” says Darroch. “We have a good chance if they fill out the Police raided the Camas what are you going to get next? Co- mends the co-op program to anyone the pleasure of working with good application. Education Bookstore, an anti- op student of the universe?’” says she talks to about it. She appreciates programs and good students, and “We have outstanding candi- authoritarian and not-for-profit Williams. “It’s funny in a way, but the help she received from the co-op it’s our job then to up the level by dates,” says Darroch. “It’s a matter bookstore run by the Camas it makes me happy.” office in getting the job and filling coaching them.” of these people taking the time to Educational Society. Police According to Greg Caws, vice out the paperwork to be nominated Darroch says the co-op depart- make the application. We definitely entered the space with a warrant to search and seize computer president of technology operations for the awards. ment will be accepting applications have the potential.” equipment and documents. Four volunteers were detained while two computers were seized, along with a Camas Educational Camosun’s counsellors here to help students Society annual report and Shaw and Telus account bills. The Ashley O’Neill there are free counselling services “Hopefully by next year we’ll has about a two-week waitlist for society says they had no informa- Contributing writer available at the college. have developed a more thorough students who want to book an hour- tion as to why the police searched Everyone has struggles from “I’m new to Camosun and I’m advertising approach in terms of long appointment in advance. But the bookstore or what led them time to time; the life of a student unaware of the types of student ser- web, posters, surveys, announce- students can book a same-day, there, but on November 10, after is no exception. It’s important for vices that are offered in the counsel- ments, and notices; however, it half-hour appointment to meet with a man was arrested in connection students to take care of their own ling department,” says Interurban depends on faculty development a counsellor and can book more with vandalism at Mayor Dean mental well-being and seek out welding student Chris Dunn. and time,” says Balmer. appointments from there. Fortin’s house, police confirmed professional help if they need it. Located on the second floor of It’s always tough for a busy “If students are having an emer- that the arrest was a result of “It is essential that students the Dawson Building at Lansdowne student to make time to speak to a gency crisis there is always a coun- the raid at Camas Bookstore. know where to access counselling campus and the second floor of counsellor. But finding time isn’t sellor available to speak to them,” Police say an email written by services and strategies for stress,” the Campus Centre at Interurban the only hurdle that may stand in says Balmer. an anonymous person claiming says Lori Race, life coach and owner campus, Camosun’s counselling the way of students reaching out In addition, the counselling responsibility for the vandalism of Simple Essence Life Design. departments offer career, per- for help. department offers workshops and was sent from a computer inside “Students should try speaking with sonal, educational, and cultural Not knowing what services are seminars throughout the year. the bookstore. A volunteer from a counsellor about what some of counselling. offered or where the services that “I’d be interested in attending the bookstore says that they have the causes of their stress are, as According to Camosun counsel- are offered can be obtained can workshops and presentations,” no involvement or knowledge of the vandalism. The man who was most stress is caused by thinking lor Chris Balmer, the department prevent Camosun students from says university transfer student arrested was later released with thoughts about the past or jumping acknowledges that they haven’t attempting to access the services Farrah Machnee, “ones that teach no charges laid. ahead to the future.” done a good job of advertising their of a counsellor. strategies for coping with everyday Many students don’t know that services. The counselling department concerns.” Clement wins CCSS leadership award The Camosun College Student Society (CCSS) has established a new award to recognize outstand- ing contribution to students. The Josh Zotzman Student Leadership Award will be awarded once a year to any person who has made an outstanding contribu- tion to improve student life or who has provided a significant service to students at Camosun. At the CCSS board meeting on November 1, Matteus Clement was voted this year’s recipient of the award. Clement got the award for his contributions as external executive for the CCSS. Clement receives a certificate and a $600 FLY TO CHINA, ASIA, OR EUROPE vacation package for his work as external executive. “I am really honored to get this award,” says FlyGreatChina.com Clement. “I have never thought of myself as a leader, but rather Lowest Fare Tickets to anywhere just someone who wanted to get things done. This leadership Tours, Hotels, Insurance award is nothing without the Chinese Entry Visa people who have helped along the way. This team we have Ph: (250)884 3389 EMAIL: [email protected] this year is amazing and I look forward to my last six months 100% local owned * BBB member * BC Reg 47387 here at Camosun with the student society.” [email protected] WORLD  Exchange program thrives UBC students study Renée Andor When a student from Camosun Staff writer goes to a partner school, that school Antarctic ice changes Camosun College’s exchange sends one of their students here. student program has been growing Ritcey says choosing a school de- Jessi Gilligan ers from New Zealand, the US, and over the last two years. For anyone pends on what field students are The Brock Press (Brock University) France, recently used the robot, or interested in studying in a foreign most interested in. ST. CATHARINE’S, ON AUV, to study the Antarctic sea ice country, it’s a really good deal, for Camosun student Kris Koniczek (CUP)—Andrew Hamilton is part and its rate of destruction. many reasons. chose to study creative writing at of a team working with an under- “Few labs in the world are able Sarah Ritcey, assistant to the the University of Wales Trinity water robot that is exploring the to investigate the spatial variability director of Camosun College Inter- Saint David in the UK. He says his effects of climate change on Ant- of ocean properties under ice,” said national, says that in Fall 2009 three experience has been amazing so far, arctica by surveying the ice-covered Bernard Laval, a professor involved students used the program to study and he even got elected as the RAG ocean. in the project, in a news release. abroad. This fall, 12 students used officer, or charity coordinator, in the “The climate system is changing Hamilton says the AUV robot it, although the program can ac- school’s student elections. both due to natural cycles and as a will allow the scientists to collect commodate up to 50. Koniczek has immersed himself result of human interference,” says data that they would not normally Doing an exchange allows stu- in the culture by seeing castles, Hamilton, a civil engineering PhD have access to; on top of that, it also dents to continue paying tuition going to food festivals, and, most student at the University of British greatly reduces risks of physical at Camosun even though they’re importantly, getting to know the Columbia. harm. studying at another school, which people there. Exchange students are this fun! “Under-ice scuba diving or Ritcey says ends up saving them “There is really no better way of which she says she’s doing here man-submersible exploration of money. to get to know a culture than to live in Victoria. She wants to work as “Few labs in the world this environment would be more there,” says Koniczek. “As a tourist a travel agent or work in a foreign dangerous and require much more you only see a slice of the pie, but as airport, and says her experience are able to investigate logistical infrastructure, and quite “It looks like a real-life a student you get to eat that whole here can help her accomplish her the spatial variability frankly the AUV can collect data pie to yourself.” goals. that these other methods could not,” version of Super Mario Kanae Ebina, from Morioka “I can turn this experience into of ocean properties says Hamilton. Land, replete with College in Japan, has been study- an advantage in my future,” says under ice.” “The AUV is like a remote sens- ing English language development Ebina. “English is an international ing satellite, and navigationally she rolling green hills and courses at Camosun for the past six language. If I can speak English, I bernard laval maneuvers like an airplane,” he ubc lollipop shaped oaks.” months. She says it took her some can communicate with many people says. “It excels at surveying large time to adapt to life in Victoria, but very easily.” areas and collecting precisely geo- Kris Koniczek she enjoys the city now. Ritcey participated in a student referenced data.” exchange student “I got accustomed to school exchange when she was in school A UBC news release states that Ultimately, the research team life, people, and foods, little by and says the experience was invalu- “scientists predict that the sea ice aims to gain a better understanding little,” says Ebina. “Now it’s much able to her because it made her more area around Antarctica will be re- of why the ocean mixing and flow “It’s significantly cheaper,” more comfortable for me to live in adaptable and open to different duced by more than 33 percent around the glaciers, collapsing of she says. “Our students who are Victoria than Japan. I’ve had a lot of cultures. She encourages students by 2100, accelerating the collapse ice shelves, and reduction in sea in Japan right now, they’re going experiences in Victoria that I can’t to consider joining the exchange of ice shelves. Up to hundreds of ice affects the temperature of the to classes with students who have do in Japan.” program. metres thick, ice shelves are floating ocean, and, by extent, the global paid like $14,000 to be there; they’re Ebina says she didn’t have many “The way the world’s changing platforms of ice that cover almost climate. paying $900.” chances for conversations with so quickly it’s just such a benefit to half of Antarctica’s coastline.” “Climate change is a global Camosun has 18 partner schools foreigners in Japan, and wants to have an international experience,” The team, which includes Ham- issue,” says Hamilton. “It’s very in countries around the world that improve her English skills as well says Ritcey. “It’s a benefit to have ilton’s classmate Alexander Forrest, important that we achieve sustain- exchange students can choose from. as learn about other cultures, both that on your resume.” scientists from UBC, and research- ability on a [large] scale.”  LIFE November 17, 2010 The month of the moustache Canada’s culinary Renée Andor

Staff writer n otto identity unclear It’s that time of year again. The nna c e lip ticklers, crumb catchers, nose j Zoë Robertson a necessary foundation for a distinct neighbours, and misplaced eye- The McGill Daily (McGill University) national cuisine. brows come out of the closet fight- MONTREAL (CUP)—In the “If you’re growing food organic- ing for a cause. minds of most people, the words ally, you’re really working with the Movember is in full swing, and “Canadian” and “cuisine” don’t soil that’s in your particular region while many people participate be- go together. to create food that tastes of that soil cause it’s fun, growing out the mo is Other countries, like France and and of that region, and you start to all about raising money for prostate Italy, have internationally recog- work with the natural advantages cancer and creating awareness nized menus whose popularity has of that region,” says Webb. “Re- about men’s health in general. crossed borders. Even Quebec has gional food identity all depends on Started in Australia in 2003, developed its own hearty cuisine, sustainability.” Movember reached Canada in 2007. with poutine beginning to appear Despite the nation’s abundant Since then, it’s grown so fast here across the US. The closest thing natural resources, most of it is not that this year Canada is leading the to a distinctly Canadian culinary being used in a sustainable or prof- world in funds raised for prostate staple comes in a large paper cup itable way. The discrepancy lies cancer research. from Tim Hortons. partly in a lack of motivation, Webb Jesse Hayman, campaign co- Nathalie Cooke, a professor explains. ordinator for Movember Canada, at McGill University, has some “The one thing we lack, of says the goal this year is to raise background in the matter. She is course, is strong support and ap- $10.4 million. As of press time, the founding editor of CuiZine: The preciation for good farming in this Canada had raised $8,989,356. Journal of Canadian Food Cultures, country, and a strong appreciation Hayman says Canada’s taken on and, most recently, editor of What’s and support for quality ingredients. Movember very well because it to Eat: Entrées in Canadian Food We have incredible opportunity but relates to Canadians’ attitudes. History, which was shortlisted for we don’t have a deep enough food “I put it to being a proud Canad- the 2010 Cuisine Canada Book culture.” ian,” says Hayman, “that we’re very Awards. laid-back people that have a good makes those conversations more collages of ‘staches that will be Cooke recognizes the problems sense of humour and can see why lighthearted. posted in high-traffic areas of the with trying to determine Canadian “Half of the best the moustache works.” UVic student Abhay Puri is campuses. food identity. According to Hayman, one in growing a mo for the third year The bigger the donation, the “Certainly, the notion of a singu- farmland in Canada is six men are diagnosed with prostate in a row. He agrees with Hayman bigger the photo that person gets lar Canadian culture is problematic,” devoted to corn and cancer, but 90 percent of the time that guys don’t talk about health on the mollage. Girls can participate says Cooke. “With a multicultural it’s curable if it’s caught early. He issues enough, and although he says by wearing fake moustaches. All of population that includes successive soybeans. It makes no says the problem is that men don’t raising money for prostate cancer the money will go to prostate cancer waves of immigrants from around sense. Most of us get checked often enough because is important, his main reason for research. the world, in addition to descend- of their pride. growing his moustache is to create Petrunik says wearing his mous- ants of the land’s First Nations, didn’t eat corn and awareness about men’s health. tache makes him feel nostalgic skepticism about a singular culinary soybeans for dinner “There’s definitely a taboo in because he always wanted to live culture is understandable.” last night, did we?” “Guys can’t normally the guy world about talking about in the ’70s, and seeing ‘staches all Margaret Webb, a writer and stuff like that,” says Puri, “so it’s a over the place makes him feel like teacher at Toronto’s Ryerson Uni- margaret webb just go and rock a good way to get the conversation he’s back in that decade. He says versity, echoed Cooke’s explanation ryerson university going.” moustaches tend to have a stigma that a particular food identity in moustache. We all Puri calls his moustache style in our culture now and likes how Canada is difficult to pinpoint. secretly want to, but the musketeers, which is a mous- Movember makes it acceptable to “Because Canada is so large, it’s Another problem is the un- we see it as socially tache with a soul patch underneath. wear one. very difficult to have a national food informed market, says Webb. Puri says Movember becomes a “Guys can’t normally just go and identity,” says Webb. “Half of the best farmland in unacceptable.” competition among men to see rock a moustache,” says Petrunik. She is hopeful, however, that Canada, which is in Ontario, is who can grow the best moustache “We all secretly want to but we see it this will change, mentioning that devoted to corn and soybeans,” she Kyle Petrunik in a month. as socially unacceptable. Any excuse aside from an initial step to produce says. “It makes no sense. Most of Camosun College Student Society And competitions and special to have a moustache, and we’re all tastier food regionally, Canada also us didn’t eat corn and soybeans for events will happen around town for right there.” has great ethnic diversity. dinner last night, did we? Yet we did. the month, including some goings- Although Movember is only “When you bring people from It’s in all our food. It’s in our cattle; on at Camosun. Kyle Petrunik, In- one month out of the year, Hayman all over the world and when these it feeds all of our livestock. It’s in all “It’s just from society, I guess,” terurban director for the Camosun hopes the conversations sparked folks bring their food inclinations of our processed food. Essentially, if says Hayman. “The idea behind College Student Society (CCSS), is during the month will make it easier to Canada, and you marry that with you have an industrial farm system, being manly and invincible and holding a “mollage” competition for men to talk about their health great, local, diverse food, then you you have no food identity.” nothing can go wrong to you.” between the two campuses for the issues all year long. get this food culture that starts to Not only is Canada’s current Hayman says men don’t talk rest of the month. “Hopefully they keep that with be pretty uniquely Canadian,” says agricultural system nutritionally about their health enough to each Petrunik and some volunteers them all year,” says Hayman, “not Webb. detrimental, according to Webb it’s other, and he hopes styling the are going around taking photos of the moustache, but the mindset, and Canadian food identity is mired economically illogical as well. ‘stache will create conversations moustaches for a minimum dona- spread it to the people they deal with in stereotypes, not all of which are “We’re producing these really about health issues because it tion of $2. The photos will go on in their everyday life.” unjustified, says Cooke. cheap crops and farmers don’t make “Maple syrup is synonymous a lot of money, and then we export with Canadian food, in part because them and we’re not getting value Canada is one of the only places, out of them,” says Webb. “Ontario John Albert Hall Lectures besides the northeast United States, is importing half of its food and it’s The John Albert Hall Lectures are sponsored by the Anglican Diocese of British Columbia with climatic conditions conducive the food we’re actually eating. We and the Centre for Studies in Religion and Society at the University of Victoria. to its production,” says Cooke. really have to get back to feeding “Quebec remains the world’s pri- ourselves. There are few countries in Kwok Pui Lan, Postcolonialism and Christianity mary maple syrup producer.” the world that have more potential William F. Cole Professor of Christian Theology and Spirituality, Episcopal Divinity School, Cambridge, Massachusetts But Webb is hoping to raise than Canada to produce amazing awareness for Canadians to cre- These lectures will scrutinize the colonial legacy of Christianity, with a focus on changing Christian demographics, the transformation food. And then you marry that with of Christianity to a non-Western religion, and the impact for theology of the rise of China and India as global economic powers. ate a lasting food identity for all the incredible ethnic diversity themselves. Lecture 1 Postcolonialism and World Christianity Lecture 3 Religious Difference and Dialogue coming into our country.” Tuesday, November 23, 7:30 pm Friday, November 26, 7:30 pm “Canadians have grown too dis- Webb mentions Ukrainian im- (Hickman building, room 105) (Hickman building, room 105) connected from our food systems, migration to Canada’s prairies as Lecture 2 Transnationalism and “Doing Theology” Lecture 4 The Postcolonial Jesus so I wanted to give them a sense of, an example of influence on a Can- in the Asia-Pacific Monday, November 29, 7:30 pm ‘Where does our food come from, adian region’s cuisine, saying that Thursday, November 25, 7:30 pm (Social Sciences and Mathematics building, room A110) how is it grown, and what are the “Ukrainian meets prairie buffalo (Hickman building, room 105) challenges these farmers are facing? equals bison perogies.” Why is environmentally sustainable Although fusion cuisine is not Kwok Pui Lan is an internationally known scholar and pioneer in Asian feminist and food better tasting and better for the a uniquely Canadian concept, it postcolonial theology. She is the author of numerous books and co-editor of Off the Menu: environment than all this industrial can be a good starting point for Asian and Asian North American Women’s Religion and Theology and Empire and the crap that we’re getting?’” the development of a national food Christian Tradition: New Readings of Classical Theologians. When food is produced locally, identity. organically, and sustainably, it starts What do you think? Persons with a disability requiring accommodation for these lectures should call 250-721-6325 at least 48 hours in advance. to take on a flavour of its own. To For more information visit www.csrs.uvic.ca or phone 250-721-6325. [email protected] Free and open to the public. Seating is limited. Visit our online events calendar at www.uvic.ca/events. Webb, this means that local food is or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. [email protected] LIFE  Digging into Victoria’s coffee underground

Tyler Rowe and proprietors is, according to Dis- it. We work so much, we don’t make Contributing writer covery Coffee owner Logan Gray, any money—we do all of it because Victoria is home to a few Blenzs, one of the best in the world. we really believe in the product. It t y ler rowe Black Stilts, and Moka Houses, and “When I got into coffee everyone makes me want to come to work at least a half-dozen Serious Cof- was really separate. When I started every day.” fees. Starbucks and Tim Hortons are Discovery, I really wanted to break Gareth Edwards, manager of each represented in double digits. down those borders,” says Gray, the King Street Café Fantastico, But every Canadian city can boast a who defines coffee culture as “the agrees with Gray. He likens the local ton of chain java houses, which turn belief in the product as an experi- specialty coffee shops to commun- out varying degrees of quality brew ence, not just consumption.” ity hubs. and espresso. What makes Victoria “At a chain store there’s a cer- different is the bustling gourmet- tain anonymity,” says Edwards, coffee scene, where espresso is “whereas a big part of our ethos taken as an art form rather than just “We work so much, we is transparency and trying to pass a hot stimulant. don’t make any on a very clear product from really There’s Discovery Coffee, Habit, well-defined and well-established 2% Jazz, Café Fantastico, Fernwood money—we do all of it sources.” Coffee, Mirage Coffee, Street Level because we really Street Level Espresso owner Espresso, Bubby Rose’s Bakery believe in the Ken Gordon notes from a technical and Café, and Café Artigiano’s, to standpoint that our climate plays a name just a few. These are the places product.” big role in coffee culture. where coffee is no longer just coffee, “We have a particularly inter- logan gray but something more serious, like esting climate here with a lot of discovery coffee cuisine or even existentialism. This humidity, a dark season, and a lot A very devoted subculture has arisen around coffee in Victoria. is called third-wave coffee. of rain,” says Gordon. “Being at sea four or five months of rain and Gordon says that consumers The first wave was instant cof- level with the humidity that comes grey. That’s the kind of emotional are starting to have a frame of refer- fee after World War II; the second By having “jams,” where baris- off the ocean is really important to environment where people really ence of what they want to taste, and wave came when the fresher Italian tas from all over the city could get brewing espresso. Crema [the light- want a coffee—something to make they’ll be disappointed when their approach to espresso started to be together and share their craft, the brown film on top of the espresso] is them a little more alert and happy needs aren’t met. taken seriously; the third wave of movement began to develop some a response to the amount of humid- the way the sun would have in, say, Edwards agrees with Gordon’s coffee includes the perfect Ethi- cohesion and co-operation. People ity in the air. If we were to take my Manitoba.” assesment of the modern coffee opian Yirgacheffe espresso, the shared information and the product setup here to Boulder, Colorado, This scene, this culture, is mo- drinker, saying people want to know Sam Jones Shitake Mushroom Soy began to improve. Gray believes the I wouldn’t be able to emulsify oils tivated to wrest coffee away from more about coffee, and about fair Cappuccino, and the pepper and 80 coffee community can be thought of in the shot and get such a viscous the big boys both for profit and for trade and organic in general. percent cocoa espresso. like an art collective. product.” the sake of coffee itself. That certainly seems to be the It’s also no longer enough to “It’s definitely an artist’s com- Another interesting aspect of “We’ve worked as a team to case. Over 8,000 people were in simply craft a drink. Discovery, Mir- munity and it’s definitely an industry Victoria’s climate and how it relates take over more of the market in the attendance at the last World Bar- age, 2% Jazz, Fernwood Coffee, and that brings together people who are to coffee is how caffeine affects rest of Victoria,” says Gordon. “We ista Championships in London, Café Fantastico are all roasting their artistic and believe in a certain way peoples’ moods, says Gordon. want to take the Starbucks and the England, with competitors from own beans, and at least a few are of doing things. That’s what I love “It’s a drug,” he says. “It’s mak- Tim Hortons drinkers because we 60 different countries. buying beans directly from coffee about the specialty-coffee industry,” ing people more positive and alert. believe in what we’re doing. Right What do you think? farmers all over the world. The local says Gray. “Everyone at the top of We have a micro-climate here that now in 2010, coffee is where wine [email protected] community of roasters, baristas, our industry is in it because we love has a particularly dark period with was in the mid-1970s.” or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. Memes keep growing in popularity Robert Snow net users. Chris Menning, a com- The Muse (Univ. of Newfoundland) munity manager for the website ST. JOHN’S, NL (CUP)—In- knowyourmeme.com, highlights ternet memes—the term may be the constantly changing nature of unfamiliar, but the content isn’t. memes. LOLCats and the Christian Bale “Basically, a meme is a handy, rant are two commonly searched theoretical unit of culture that memes. undergoes natural selection in its One of the most popular is David replication,” says Menning. “On After Dentist, where seven-year-old the internet, this often comes in the David is trying to come to terms with form of an image, phrase, or video the lightheaded feeling of anesthesia that inspires people to manipulate after a trip to the dentist. it, pass it around, and oftentimes The video has received over seek out more of it.” 71 million hits on YouTube and Knowyourmeme.com—based spawned a few giggle-worthy one- in New York City—is specifically liners—“Is this real life?” and “I designed to track memes, analyze feel funny, why is this happening their content, and report on the dif- to me?” ferent opinions of each trend. Cats are popular internet memes. The site incorporates detailed memes consisting of auto-tuned articles on most known memes remixes of viral videos, some of and their writers use web-traffic which display the creator’s legitim- “A meme is a handy, tracking tools, like Google Trends, ate musical talent. YouTube musical theoretical unit of to track how popular a meme be- group The Gregory Brothers are an culture that undergoes comes over the course of weeks excellent example, with their Auto Jan 2011 and months. Tune the News series and the wildly natural selection in its The site also posts video epi- popular “Double Rainbow” and replication.” sodes in which knowyourmeme. “Bed Intruder” songs. The Gregory com “internet scientists” explain Brothers have even begun to earn a Chris Menning how a meme began and why it’s profit from memes by releasing their knowyourmeme.com spreading. remixes on iTunes. One important aspect of memes Meanwhile, Menning believes is how they show off the artistic skill that internet memes are here to But the memes all have one and creativity of their creators. Alter- stay. thing in common—as they spread nate Universe is one such meme that “Culture is fundamentally made from person to person, new ver- is made up of images depicting out of memes like words, pictures sions and parodies are created. This popular characters re-imagined and concepts,” he says. “As long results in a unique piece of culture as part of other worlds—highly as we are social animals who com- that both entertains and connects realistic illustrations of Super Mario municate with one another, and as its audience. characters, for example. These im- long as there is an internet, there Memes take multiple forms, ages are posted purely for fun and will be internet memes.” but they are set apart from a com- they rarely carry a complicated What do you think? monplace viral video in how they message. [email protected] are copied and altered by Inter- A popular trend now is to create or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076.  SPORTS November 17, 2010 Men’s b-ball coach obsessively dedicated

Emily Laing to find its identity early on and performs as a unit. Staff writer maintain long-term players, but The new lineup will go through Chargers basketball head coach the Chargers are proving to be up some growing pains, but centre Jor- Craig Price is ready to reconstruct for the challenge. dan Pendlebury expects the team to the men’s basketball team as they Point guard James Lundy is new come together and improve over the prepare for the season ahead. After to the team, and while he’s known course of the season. Pendlebury, a disheartening string of losses last for his hustle plays and teamwork, a new recruit from Cowichan, is season, the Chargers are returning he will be sure to contribute a strong projected to be a starter and a focal with a much younger team and offensive role this season. point in the offence. many uncertainties. “We’re a young squad, we only “We did poorly last season,” have five returners, so it will take us says Price. “We had seven players “Our overall goal is to time to get our heads into this, but leave and some were let go due to we hope to bring home some wins,” bad attitudes, which was very frus- be perfect, and I know says Pendlebury. “This is a lot more trating for me because I recruited that’s never going to intense than high school, but we’re most of the players that left.” all here to support each other.” According to Price, losing some happen.” Price realizes that with rookie key starters is going to be tough on craig price players such as Lundy and Pendle- the team; however, players who have camosun chargers bury, the team has their work cut out had less demanding roles in the past for them, but he’s trying to keep his will be stepping up and contributing goals realistic. heavily this season. “We’re aiming to at least make “Some years you’re not going “Our team is full of rookies the playoffs this year,” says Lundy. to have the talent and we haven’t, fresh out of high school, so it’s “We have a lot of first years, but but I also think we haven’t played not a surprise that we’re lack- that’s no excuse to lose.” to our full potential,” says Price. ing in certain areas,” says Price. What will prove most difficult “Our overall goal is to be perfect, Camosun Chargers coach Craig Price hopes for the perfect season. “We’re predominately a two-year for the Chargers will be building and I know that’s never going to he admits to an overall level of equally get discouraged,” says Price. school, so we’re accustomed to the team chemistry. Being familiar with happen.” frustration. “I’m always concerned, it’s my job. turnover.” each other and how each teammate Although Price insists he feels “When we fail to perform the Most successful coaches I know are This year’s team may struggle plays will be crucial in how the team optimistic with his new recruits, same way we do in practice we all fairly obsessive.” Increasing Canucks ticket prices alienate students Jason Saliani start at $151; the most expensive “It’s expensive to go see a than the $300 she would have paid in,” says Simpson. “For purely Contributing writer seat is $252. Canucks game,” says Simpson, for tickets in Vancouver during the watching the game itself there’s The NHL season is once again “especially if you’re a student on playoffs. nothing better than a 50-inch HD in full swing, and the Vancouver Vancouver Island, with all the asso- “The price difference in other TV with play-by-play and colour Canucks are serious contenders for “The price difference ciated costs of ferries and hotels.” hockey markets is pretty eye open- commentary.” the ever-elusive Stanley Cup. Interurban business student ing,” says Simpson. “It’s pretty Many sports bars also have This is very exciting for local in other hockey and self-proclaimed “nucklehead” crazy, especially if you’re going to game-day specials on drinks, which hockey fans, but actually going to markets is pretty eye Alyssa Sommerfeld says that after see the exact same product.” is much cheaper than what Simpson see a game depends on how deep paying for tickets, meals, and trans- Cheaper alternatives are avail- refers to as the “outrageously over- people are willing to reach into opening. It’s pretty portation costs, the price tag is able as well. Junior teams such as priced $8 beers at GM Place.” their pockets. crazy, especially if indeed hefty. the Vancouver Giants, the Victoria What sports fans are paying for This year the price of a single “The whole thing for one Salmon Kings, or the Victoria Griz- now when they go to see a game is nosebleed seat went up to $71, you’re going to see the game can be $500,” says Sommer- zlies play a high-calibre game at a the experience; the all-encompass- making them the most expensive exact same product.” feld, “which most students can’t fraction of the ticket price. ing atmosphere, and doing the cheap seats in the NHL. afford.” And for more of that great Can- wave and cheering with 18,000 “That’s pretty hefty for a trevor simpson Sommerfeld says that last year adian hockey atmosphere there’s other fans. cheap seat, where you’re gonna be Camosun student she flew down to Los Angeles and the sports fan’s home away from “You could never really sub- crammed at the back,” says eco- saw the Canucks play the LA Kings home—the sports bar. Simpson stitute that in-game atmosphere,” nomics student Trevor Simpson. in game five of the playoffs for the says that sports bars have lots of says Simpson. And the news doesn’t get better Buying the tickets isn’t the only same cost as if she went to Vancou- people, lots of screens to watch the What do you think? for seats anywhere near the action. expense that comes with leaving the ver to watch a game. She got tickets game on, and it’s always loud. [email protected] The prices for the lower bowl tickets island to see a game. for $59 in LA, which is much less “It’s a great atmosphere to be or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. GRAB A NEXUS Copies of Nexus are now located on the outskirts of campus in our handy blue boxes. Find us near the Richmond and Foul Bay bus stops at Lansdowne, and near the bus shelter at Interurban. No more boring bus rides!

250-370-3591 [email protected] nexusnewspaper.com Richmond House 201, Lansdowne [email protected] SPORTS  SPORTS BRIEFS by ERIN BALL Local swimmer brings home the gold Emily Laing Ryan Cochrane is studying Chargers women Staff writer psychology at the University of Vic- win two, lose two Local swimmer Ryan Coch- toria and is in his 13th season with The Camosun Chargers rane recently returned from the the Victoria Academy of Swimming, women’s basketball team won Commonwealth Games in Dehli, training with Olympic and World two games against the Columbia India with not one, but two gold Team coach Randy Bennett. Bible College Bearcats on medals. “I’ve been training with Randy November 5 and 6. The Bearcats Cochrane burst onto the inter- since I was 13 and we’ve been were competing with only seven national swimming scene with his through all the highs and lows players and the Chargers out- debut at the 2006 Commonwealth through my maturing as a competi- scored them in every quarter, games in Melbourne, Australia, tive swimmer,” says Cochrane. ending the game at 92–34. The finishing with a bronze in the 1500m The Commonwealth Games Bearcats were down to five category. were a bit daunting for Cochrane players for the second game But this year was Cochrane’s his first time around, but this year and lost their center after she year. He won gold at Dehli in both he went into the competitions with fouled out in the third quarter, the 400m and 1500m categories. more confidence. leaving them short-handed. The Swimming hasn’t always been “It’s intimidating going into Chargers ended the game 92–20. first priority for Cochrane, but he But despite a promising start to these scenarios and not knowing the season, the women lost their learned fast that the sport had more what’s going to happen,” says Coch- home-opener game on November to offer him. rane. “My first international meet 12, 91–47, against the Capilano was in Melbourne, so I knew what Blues. The Chargers couldn’t to expect going to Delhi.” penetrate the Blues defense and “It was tremendously Cochrane is the first Canadian had problems scoring, with 19 hard, but I remained man in 72 years to win the 400m baskets on 69 shots. They played freestyle at the Commonwealth the Blues again the next day, focused to get my Games. On the first day of the and the game was close for the hand on the wall first.” games, Cochrane stood on the po- first three quarters, but the team dium to receive gold. fell behind in the fourth and lost Ryan Cochrane “The 400 is what I do inter- 80–73. Championship swimmer nationally, but definitely not what I’m known for,” says Cochrane. Chargers men also “It was tremendously hard, but I win two, drop two “I played soccer and baseball, remained focused to get my hand The Camosun Chargers but I have plantar fasciitis, so I on the wall first.” men’s basketball team won couldn’t run very well. I was also in Competing in different countries both their season opener games a lot of pain most of the time,” says is exciting, says Cochrane, while at Victoria’s Ryan Cochrane stands proud with one of his swimming medals. on November 5 and 6 against Cochrane. “Swimming was one of the same time he has learned to ap- the Columbia Bible College the things I could do because there preciate his home even more. was an overall great experience.” twice this year at the Common- Bearcats. In the first game, the was no pressure on my knees and “I really love to compete, but it’s “We really didn’t know what to wealth Games, Cochrane hopes Bearcats were leading until the it’s such a different environment hard at times since I average 80,000 expect going into the games, you his momentum will progress at the third quarter, when the Chargers than what I’m used to.” meters a week, so it gets monoton- want to think the best but when 2012 Olympic Summer Games in surged ahead and won the game He took to the pool as a child and ous,” says Cochrane. “Traveling to the press is telling you the villages London, England. 81–66. The second game saw was competing in swimming meets all these places makes you appreci- in Delhi are unlivable, it’s a little “This has been a motivator for the Bearcats take an early lead, by age nine. Now the 22-year-old is a ate what you have.” daunting,” says Cochrane. the next two years,” says Cochrane. but the Chargers were eager for decorated champion and dubbed as Despite being warned of the con- another win in front of the home After winning Olympic bronze “I got my mind set on being on top one of the most versatile swimmers crowd and pulled ahead to lead ditions in Dehli, Cochrane says the in Beijing in 2008, silver at the world of the podium at the Olympics in the rest of the game. The game in the world. volunteers were “incredible and it championships in 2009, and gold London.” ended at 95–78 for the Chargers. But the men couldn’t hold onto their winning momentum and lost their home opener against MMA league fights to be understood Nanaimo’s Capilano Blues on November 12. The Chargers lost Emily Laing to recognize this as a professional 67–57, even though they out- Staff writer sport rather than human cockfight- scored the Blues in the fourth The Armageddon Fighting ing. But some of the illicit cockfight- quarter. The two teams matched Championships (AFC) is the pin- ing behaviour still occurs during up again the next day and at nacle of mixed martial arts, which the fights. half time the Blues led the game is a hybrid of boxing, jujitsu, and by six points. Despite an evenly wrestling; it represents the highest matched game, the Blues ended level of accomplishment in hand-to- “Mixed martial arts up on top again with a score of hand battle. 81–77. In his last 15 years as a boxer started as very Victoria Seals and mixed martial arts fighter, Jason barbaric, but now it Heit has received stitches above his call it quits eyes over 20 times. involves numerous Local baseball team The Interest in the sport stemmed rules and regulations Victoria Seals announced on from a destructive curiosity for November 10 that they will cease Heit, and it quickly developed into to make it safe.” operations, effective immedi- a lifestyle. Jason Heit ately. The team has announced “I was an aggressive child and Armageddon Fighting that this decision is due to the I didn’t have a way to channel it, Championships conditions of their lease at Royal so I was put into boxing and mixed Athletic Park and the unstable martial arts,” says Heit, who is state of the Golden Baseball League (GBL). The Seals have ex- also executive producer of the Vic- “The training is the biggest chal- pressed dissatisfaction with their toria-based AFC. “It has given me lenge and the reward is the feeling I lease agreement with the City of tremendous focus in my years.” get from fighting,” says Kaufman. Victoria in the past, and there is Mixed martial arts has long been “I admit to being a little crazy in the some uncertainty surrounding considered a very risky sport for its cage because I go out there smiling the financial situation of the GBL. participants, but with the success of and I always have a great time.” Just look at those amazing washboard abs on Jason Heit! Seals president Darren Parker the mainstream Ultimate Fighting Kaufman explains there have says that he’s disappointed about Championships, it’s risen to the been many preconceived notions Kaufman. “It’s been misinterpreted The AFC itself has begun a ma- the decision to shut the Seals mainstream in Victoria. in regards to mixed martial arts, and has been very difficult to get jor national expansion effort and down. “The support we received “Over time it’s evolved into an which are believed to be similar to the proper acknowledgment over has continued to generate an audi- from this community was un- extreme sport; it started as very raw back-alley fights where blood the years.” ence between the ages of 18 and 35, paralleled at this level, and I am barbaric, but now it involves numer- is shed, veins bulge, and faces go In an effort to get that acknow- according to Heit. extremely disappointed that our ous rules and regulations to make it blue as fighters seem intent on just ledgment, the AFC has attempted “The sport is misunderstood by current situation with the lease safe,” says Heit. choking out their opponents. to better their image by working older generations,” says Heit, “but and the City of Victoria has made World champion Sarah Kauf- But this is not always the case, with sports commissions, which younger people seem to get it.” it financially impossible for the man has been involved in the world according to Kaufman. are increasingly regulating mixed Seals to go forward any further,” What do you think? of MMA for over five years, and has “The sport involves intensive martial arts and establishing a [email protected] said Parker. been encouraging the community training and incredible skill,” says combined set of rules. or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. 10 November 17, 2010 FEATURE Hecklers and rubber chickens: Stand-up comedy in Victoria

Amanda Richardson staff writer

very three-year-old with a good knock-knock or chicken joke is a stand-up comic, “You have to go somewhere where there are a lot of rooms, where you can perform nightly and Jimmy Fallon, give credit to tours and TV shows like Just for Laughs. Cook says that One of the better-known jokes of Victoria-born and New York-based comedian Kristeen commanding the rapt attention of parents and siblings, honing their craft and in front of an audience and get a real gauge for how you’re doing,” he says. “I know Victoria his defining moment was in New York City in 1995. Von Hagen is based on the Shania Twain song, “That Don’t Impress Me Much.” Featured punch lines... until something shiny comes along. It’s a rare few, however, that has a couple of rooms, but there aren’t enough to get a really good grip on standup.” “[I was] five years into standup, and the producers ofDavid Letterman saw me at a club in on her Comedy Now special as well as Just for Laughs, the joke’s blatant theft by an upstart can parlay that childhood art into a career. Lamb echoes Alaimo’s advice, but says that you should begin with local open-mic nights The Village, and it was then I got offered to do my first Late Night set,” he says. “And to be comedian at Heckler’s saw a chorus of furious whispers break out amongst ELuckily for us, some people do manage to hang on to that stage presence through the before making the move off the rock, saying that the opportunities exist in Victoria if you able to do that with Letterman was kind of that validation that you’re looking for.” the comics waiting in the wings. rough-and-tumble years of adolescence, adding just enough paranoid, neurotic baggage make the effort. “That’s a really bad version of Kristeen Von Hagen’s bit,” Lamb to make them perfectly qualified for the job of stand-up comic. “There are other little rooms popping up here and there around Victoria,” says Lamb. Going pro says before slipping away to discuss the matter with a thoroughly There are as many styles of stand up as there are comics, and for up-and-coming comed- “The Upstairs Lounge is getting one on Wednesday nights, and there’s the comedy night Having done standup for the past 20 years, Cook has seen it all. From a Comedy unimpressed Banner. ians there’s no shortage of inspiration to draw on. Whether you’re inclined towards the at the Victoria Event Centre.” Network special to seven full-length albums, Cook has been in the business for Despite the night’s events, Lamb still says that joke stealing is family-friendly stylings of Bill Cosby, the relentless cynicism of Jeremy Hotz, or the crass, long enough to no longer get phased by the small stuff like unruly audience uncommon and rarely happens at Hecklers. physical humour of Billy Connelly, there’s a comic idol and style out there for everyone. Sellout arena members and bad reviews. “It’s so rare because you can’t get away with it,” he says. “The Admittedly, Victoria isn’t the easiest place in the world to get a start at as a young comic, With the big city comes bigger crowds, and now that Humber College has a once-a-week “It’s almost weird to admit, but it becomes, it becomes a badge of honour comedy community is so entwined that eventually someone’s go- and isn’t likely to be the birthplace of the next Robin Williams or Norm MacDonald, but spot at Yuk Yuks Comedy Club, Alaimo is learning that there’s more to comedy than hold- in a strange way,” says Cook. “You learn to appreciate the fact that if ing to narc you out. It will blow your career out of the water.” there are rooms popping up around the city featuring amateur and open-mic nights that ing a mic and memorizing punchlines. you’ve got a group of fans and then nobody else cared, you feel somewhat are prime places to start. “You have to have a thick skin. When I first started hecklers would tear me apart. They vanilla. And yet, I find the more that you have detractors and people Comic’s code still do sometimes. You almost have to dedicate entire sets to dealing with the crowd. Just pounding you, it’s kind of good for everybody. It keeps you in everybody’s Comedy, like so many other things, is subjective. Amateur night abandon your routine and interact with the audience. It’s like a muscle you have to work discussion. It certainly has helped me continue to find fans because I can’t tell Standups can be booed off the stage one night Jason Lamb, morning-show co-host at The Zone radio station and host at Hecklers Bar out. If you stop doing it, you’ll lose your skill at it. And sometimes the hecklers are right,” you how many emails I’ll get where somebody says, ‘I heard a DJ saying that he and given a standing ovation the next night, and Grill, advises burgeoning comedians to make up a five-minute set and try an amateur Alaimo says with a laugh. “Sometimes you do suck, and you can’t argue with them.” didn’t care for you. I listen. I’m a fan.’“ though those extremes are rare. A good set night. He also recommends coming out beforehand to see what it’s all about. If moving to Toronto isn’t an option, Christine Melko Ross, vice president of operations Melko Ross says that the potential for being poorly received isn’t the depends on the room and the audience, “It can be pretty empowering to come down and you think, ‘Oh, I’m funnier than that and business affairs at Canadian comedy TV show and tour, Just For Laughs, says they hardest part of being a stand-up comedian; the lifestyle is. but ultimately comes down to the comic guy. I could do this.’ It can build your confidence, as daunting as it is to get on stage,” says have scouts around the country constantly seeking out new talent. being able to judge what his audience Lamb. “We have a variety of showcases across the country where we arrange with comedy clubs wants and needs. Over 12 years into his comedy career, Lamb remembers his days as a stand-up fan, long to find new talent, and we send scouts out there,” says Melko Ross. “When we’re looking “It’s important to have a clean set and before he ever took the stage himself. for talent, we’re really looking for up-and-comers, just on the verge of breaking.” a dirty set,” says Alaimo. “You have “I’ve always been a fan of comedy, ever since I was a little kid,” says Lamb. “I was obsessed Comfortable where he is as the host at Hecklers, Lamb says he’s not interested right now to gauge it on your audience. I’ve had with Steve Martin when I was younger. I would make collages out of his TV Guide clippings, in making a big push forward in his career. With a steady job, a wife, and kid, Lamb isn’t sets where I’ve been like, ‘Fuck this, really just getting into comedy at a really young age as a fan.” willing or able to hit the road on a tour. fuck that,’ and I’ve looked beside me “I’m not a huge success or anything, but I’m happy with my progress,” says Lamb. “I’ve and there’s a seven-year-old kid with made a lot of really cool friends doing comedy, and honestly, that’s a really big part of it their parents covering their ears, “I was obsessed with Steve Martin when I was younger. I would for me. The network of comedians I’ve met over the years, they’re really cool people, and staring at me in disgust.” make collages out of his TV Guide clippings.” I’m happy to be a part of that. For now, this is great.” Yet putting too much thought into “It takes work,” she says. “It can get lonely, because comedy isn’t like it can stunt the natural flow of a rou- Jason Lamb hecklers bar and grill music. There’s no band or entourage with you. There’s a lot of time tine. When it comes down to brass “If you’ve got a group of fans and then nobody else cared, you spent alone on the road. Then it’s about hard work, writing lots, and tacks, you have to just do it. feel somewhat vanilla. The more that you have detractors and trying new things.” “The only way to be a stand-up Grinning down at Steve Martin’s silk-screened face on his t-shirt, Lamb says that his people pounding you, it’s good for everybody.” Lamb says that another difficult part of comedy is dealing with other comic is to be a stand-up comic,” says biggest regret when it comes to comedy is not starting earlier. comedians. The community is small, which can lead to a lot of ego and Lamb. “It’s not enough to just watch Dane Cook “I went through my teens and early twenties just doing my thing, and then when I was comedian unnecessary drama, and while he’s made a lot of friends by network- it or memorize things, you have to get 27 I decided that instead of just being a fan of stand-up comedy and thinking I’m a funny ing, there’s still the aspect of competition. up on stage, alone with a microphone, person, that I would actually give it a shot,” says Lamb. “So I started showing up at open- “Everyone is each other’s competition,” says Lamb. “Everyone is and do it.” mic nights, and have gone from there.” Having been through it all and come out on top, celebrity comedian Dane Cook says that looking for work.” Now at the pinnacle of his career, Cook Just breaking onto the comedy scene is Camosun College applied communication program every comic finds their footholds in local clubs. Just five years into stand up, Kevin Banner, a regular at Hecklers, has come to terms with the reality of show graduate Guy Alaimo. Currently taking comedy writing and performance at Humber College “It all starts in front of 35 people on a random Monday night, where you’re going to pop has already started a room out in Sooke. Mulligan’s Bar and Grill business and the constant ebb and flow of in Toronto, Alaimo is quick to say that he’s not at school to learn to be funny, but rather to in,” says Cook during an interview with Nexus. “You’re not scheduled. And it’s one little now has the Stump Ranch Comedy Show, with thanks to Banner. highs and lows. build and perfect what he already knows. nugget of an idea that kind of strikes your fancy during the day. For me, it’s that immediate He says that the best way to be a part of the comedy scene and keep “There was always this voice in the back “A lot of people shit on the program because they think that you can’t teach somebody to itch that I have to scratch. Does that work? Is that funny? Is that relatable? And so it starts feuds at bay is to follow one simple rule—do not steal jokes. of my brain, like just enjoy the whole thing. be funny, and that people are taking the program because they think it’ll make them funny, in that small club atmosphere, and you work it up.” “You have to be yourself, and don’t steal jokes,” says Banner. There’s going to be ups. There’s going to be downs. but that’s not how it works,” says Alaimo. “We learn general business things, like how Cook, who’s coming to Victoria on November 28, is going back down to his roots, resur- “You won’t get respect, and you won’t get work. You also have to There’s going to be incredible highlight moments. much to charge for standup, that kind of thing, as well as all the other aspects of comedy recting the style that made him a household name, saying that his last tour was a bit heavier have a point of view, not just an attitude,” says Banner. There’s going to be really difficult, impossible mo- and acting like improv, sketch, and script writing.” and darker than the old days. Lamb, too, is adamant about having original material. ments. That’s what a career is,” says Cook. “There The comedy writing and performance program at Humber has only been around for the “This time around, I feel like this would hearken back a bit more to when I released Harm- “Every comic in the world will say this—do not steal jokes from other com- are always going to be the people that embrace you last decade, but has come to be well known and respected. Often compared to The Second ful If Swallowed, when I was really in an absurd-humour phase,” says Cook. “I really loved edians,” he says. “Regardless of how unknown they are, just always write and fill an arena, and then there’s going to be people City Training Centre, also in Toronto, Humber is a stepping stone for those interested in physical and absurdist-type humour and stories. And so I find myself kind of back in that your own stuff. If someone finds out that you’re doing their stuff, you’ll be outside throwing an egg at it.” perusing comedy as a career. And like most will tell you, Alaimo insists that the key to place.” shunned from the community and it’ll really fuck up your career.” What do you think? [email protected] jumpstarting your career is to move to a bigger city. Many comics have schools like Humber or Second City to thank. Others, like Jerry Seinfeld A mere two hours later, an in-the-flesh joke stealer graced the stage at Hecklers. or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. FEATURE [email protected] 11 Hecklers and rubber chickens: Stand-up comedy in Victoria

very three-year-old with a good knock-knock or chicken joke is a stand-up comic, “You have to go somewhere where there are a lot of rooms, where you can perform nightly and Jimmy Fallon, give credit to tours and TV shows like Just for Laughs. Cook says that One of the better-known jokes of Victoria-born and New York-based comedian Kristeen commanding the rapt attention of parents and siblings, honing their craft and in front of an audience and get a real gauge for how you’re doing,” he says. “I know Victoria his defining moment was in New York City in 1995. Von Hagen is based on the Shania Twain song, “That Don’t Impress Me Much.” Featured punch lines... until something shiny comes along. It’s a rare few, however, that has a couple of rooms, but there aren’t enough to get a really good grip on standup.” “[I was] five years into standup, and the producers ofDavid Letterman saw me at a club in on her Comedy Now special as well as Just for Laughs, the joke’s blatant theft by an upstart can parlay that childhood art into a career. Lamb echoes Alaimo’s advice, but says that you should begin with local open-mic nights The Village, and it was then I got offered to do my first Late Night set,” he says. “And to be comedian at Heckler’s saw a chorus of furious whispers break out amongst ELuckily for us, some people do manage to hang on to that stage presence through the before making the move off the rock, saying that the opportunities exist in Victoria if you able to do that with Letterman was kind of that validation that you’re looking for.” the comics waiting in the wings. rough-and-tumble years of adolescence, adding just enough paranoid, neurotic baggage make the effort. “That’s a really bad version of Kristeen Von Hagen’s bit,” Lamb to make them perfectly qualified for the job of stand-up comic. “There are other little rooms popping up here and there around Victoria,” says Lamb. Going pro says before slipping away to discuss the matter with a thoroughly There are as many styles of stand up as there are comics, and for up-and-coming comed- “The Upstairs Lounge is getting one on Wednesday nights, and there’s the comedy night Having done standup for the past 20 years, Cook has seen it all. From a Comedy unimpressed Banner. ians there’s no shortage of inspiration to draw on. Whether you’re inclined towards the at the Victoria Event Centre.” Network special to seven full-length albums, Cook has been in the business for Despite the night’s events, Lamb still says that joke stealing is family-friendly stylings of Bill Cosby, the relentless cynicism of Jeremy Hotz, or the crass, long enough to no longer get phased by the small stuff like unruly audience uncommon and rarely happens at Hecklers. physical humour of Billy Connelly, there’s a comic idol and style out there for everyone. Sellout arena members and bad reviews. “It’s so rare because you can’t get away with it,” he says. “The Admittedly, Victoria isn’t the easiest place in the world to get a start at as a young comic, With the big city comes bigger crowds, and now that Humber College has a once-a-week “It’s almost weird to admit, but it becomes, it becomes a badge of honour comedy community is so entwined that eventually someone’s go- and isn’t likely to be the birthplace of the next Robin Williams or Norm MacDonald, but spot at Yuk Yuks Comedy Club, Alaimo is learning that there’s more to comedy than hold- in a strange way,” says Cook. “You learn to appreciate the fact that if ing to narc you out. It will blow your career out of the water.” there are rooms popping up around the city featuring amateur and open-mic nights that ing a mic and memorizing punchlines. you’ve got a group of fans and then nobody else cared, you feel somewhat are prime places to start. “You have to have a thick skin. When I first started hecklers would tear me apart. They vanilla. And yet, I find the more that you have detractors and people Comic’s code still do sometimes. You almost have to dedicate entire sets to dealing with the crowd. Just pounding you, it’s kind of good for everybody. It keeps you in everybody’s Comedy, like so many other things, is subjective. Amateur night abandon your routine and interact with the audience. It’s like a muscle you have to work discussion. It certainly has helped me continue to find fans because I can’t tell Standups can be booed off the stage one night Jason Lamb, morning-show co-host at The Zone radio station and host at Hecklers Bar out. If you stop doing it, you’ll lose your skill at it. And sometimes the hecklers are right,” you how many emails I’ll get where somebody says, ‘I heard a DJ saying that he and given a standing ovation the next night, and Grill, advises burgeoning comedians to make up a five-minute set and try an amateur Alaimo says with a laugh. “Sometimes you do suck, and you can’t argue with them.” didn’t care for you. I listen. I’m a fan.’“ though those extremes are rare. A good set night. He also recommends coming out beforehand to see what it’s all about. If moving to Toronto isn’t an option, Christine Melko Ross, vice president of operations Melko Ross says that the potential for being poorly received isn’t the depends on the room and the audience, “It can be pretty empowering to come down and you think, ‘Oh, I’m funnier than that and business affairs at Canadian comedy TV show and tour, Just For Laughs, says they hardest part of being a stand-up comedian; the lifestyle is. but ultimately comes down to the comic guy. I could do this.’ It can build your confidence, as daunting as it is to get on stage,” says have scouts around the country constantly seeking out new talent. being able to judge what his audience Lamb. “We have a variety of showcases across the country where we arrange with comedy clubs wants and needs. Over 12 years into his comedy career, Lamb remembers his days as a stand-up fan, long to find new talent, and we send scouts out there,” says Melko Ross. “When we’re looking “It’s important to have a clean set and a dirty set. “It’s important to have a clean set and before he ever took the stage himself. for talent, we’re really looking for up-and-comers, just on the verge of breaking.” I’ve done dirty sets where I’ve looked beside me and a dirty set,” says Alaimo. “You have “I’ve always been a fan of comedy, ever since I was a little kid,” says Lamb. “I was obsessed Comfortable where he is as the host at Hecklers, Lamb says he’s not interested right now there’s a seven-year-old kid with their parents to gauge it on your audience. I’ve had with Steve Martin when I was younger. I would make collages out of his TV Guide clippings, in making a big push forward in his career. With a steady job, a wife, and kid, Lamb isn’t sets where I’ve been like, ‘Fuck this, really just getting into comedy at a really young age as a fan.” willing or able to hit the road on a tour. covering their ears, staring at me in disgust.” fuck that,’ and I’ve looked beside me “I’m not a huge success or anything, but I’m happy with my progress,” says Lamb. “I’ve guy alaimo and there’s a seven-year-old kid with made a lot of really cool friends doing comedy, and honestly, that’s a really big part of it comedian their parents covering their ears, for me. The network of comedians I’ve met over the years, they’re really cool people, and staring at me in disgust.” I’m happy to be a part of that. For now, this is great.” Yet putting too much thought into “It takes work,” she says. “It can get lonely, because comedy isn’t like it can stunt the natural flow of a rou- music. There’s no band or entourage with you. There’s a lot of time tine. When it comes down to brass spent alone on the road. Then it’s about hard work, writing lots, and tacks, you have to just do it. trying new things.” “The only way to be a stand-up Grinning down at Steve Martin’s silk-screened face on his t-shirt, Lamb says that his Lamb says that another difficult part of comedy is dealing with other comic is to be a stand-up comic,” says biggest regret when it comes to comedy is not starting earlier. comedians. The community is small, which can lead to a lot of ego and Lamb. “It’s not enough to just watch “I went through my teens and early twenties just doing my thing, and then when I was unnecessary drama, and while he’s made a lot of friends by network- it or memorize things, you have to get 27 I decided that instead of just being a fan of stand-up comedy and thinking I’m a funny ing, there’s still the aspect of competition. up on stage, alone with a microphone, person, that I would actually give it a shot,” says Lamb. “So I started showing up at open- “Everyone is each other’s competition,” says Lamb. “Everyone is and do it.” mic nights, and have gone from there.” Having been through it all and come out on top, celebrity comedian Dane Cook says that looking for work.” Now at the pinnacle of his career, Cook Just breaking onto the comedy scene is Camosun College applied communication program every comic finds their footholds in local clubs. Just five years into stand up, Kevin Banner, a regular at Hecklers, has come to terms with the reality of show graduate Guy Alaimo. Currently taking comedy writing and performance at Humber College “It all starts in front of 35 people on a random Monday night, where you’re going to pop has already started a room out in Sooke. Mulligan’s Bar and Grill business and the constant ebb and flow of in Toronto, Alaimo is quick to say that he’s not at school to learn to be funny, but rather to in,” says Cook during an interview with Nexus. “You’re not scheduled. And it’s one little now has the Stump Ranch Comedy Show, with thanks to Banner. highs and lows. build and perfect what he already knows. nugget of an idea that kind of strikes your fancy during the day. For me, it’s that immediate He says that the best way to be a part of the comedy scene and keep “There was always this voice in the back “A lot of people shit on the program because they think that you can’t teach somebody to itch that I have to scratch. Does that work? Is that funny? Is that relatable? And so it starts feuds at bay is to follow one simple rule—do not steal jokes. of my brain, like just enjoy the whole thing. be funny, and that people are taking the program because they think it’ll make them funny, in that small club atmosphere, and you work it up.” “You have to be yourself, and don’t steal jokes,” says Banner. There’s going to be ups. There’s going to be downs. but that’s not how it works,” says Alaimo. “We learn general business things, like how Cook, who’s coming to Victoria on November 28, is going back down to his roots, resur- “You won’t get respect, and you won’t get work. You also have to There’s going to be incredible highlight moments. much to charge for standup, that kind of thing, as well as all the other aspects of comedy recting the style that made him a household name, saying that his last tour was a bit heavier have a point of view, not just an attitude,” says Banner. There’s going to be really difficult, impossible mo- and acting like improv, sketch, and script writing.” and darker than the old days. Lamb, too, is adamant about having original material. ments. That’s what a career is,” says Cook. “There The comedy writing and performance program at Humber has only been around for the “This time around, I feel like this would hearken back a bit more to when I released Harm- “Every comic in the world will say this—do not steal jokes from other com- are always going to be the people that embrace you last decade, but has come to be well known and respected. Often compared to The Second ful If Swallowed, when I was really in an absurd-humour phase,” says Cook. “I really loved edians,” he says. “Regardless of how unknown they are, just always write and fill an arena, and then there’s going to be people City Training Centre, also in Toronto, Humber is a stepping stone for those interested in physical and absurdist-type humour and stories. And so I find myself kind of back in that your own stuff. If someone finds out that you’re doing their stuff, you’ll be outside throwing an egg at it.” perusing comedy as a career. And like most will tell you, Alaimo insists that the key to place.” shunned from the community and it’ll really fuck up your career.” What do you think? [email protected] jumpstarting your career is to move to a bigger city. Many comics have schools like Humber or Second City to thank. Others, like Jerry Seinfeld A mere two hours later, an in-the-flesh joke stealer graced the stage at Hecklers. or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. Nexus logo contest Design our new logo!

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There will be prizes. What kind of prizes? It’s a surprise. Deadline December 8 But they will be good. And noon the grand prize will be great. [email protected] ARTS 13 Video game poetry gets to level two a i n otto t i ca ss e j nna c e Nexus logo contest j

Shawn O’Hara their cultural products.” ment. They are our storytelling med- ment, and video games are pure Contributing writer After discussing Jones’ poem, ium, they’re our way of expressing entertainment.” The poetry of Zelda Poetry brings to mind many the group began to wonder if any- ourselves.” Jones says that Select Your Char- things: romance, heartache, beauty, one else had poems that were about Jones laughs as he elaborates acter is a good opportunity for Wondering exactly what poetry based the inner workings of the human video games. It turns out they did. on that last thought. “Or maybe we people to get lots of entertainment on video games might consist of? soul on an intrinsically intimate “We got to talking,” says Jones, can’t express ourselves properly, so out of poetry. Check out this excerpt from “Zelda,” level. But not video games. “and almost organically, it became, we play video games.” “They’ll laugh, they’ll cry; well, written by local poet Dave Morris, as A group of local poets called ‘Hey, this would be great as the Jones says that one of the rea- hopefully, they’ll mostly laugh,” he a teaser for what to expect at Select Not Your Grandma’s Poetry aims to theme for a show.’” sons that the first video game poetry says. “It’s big on audience partici- Your Character. change that with Select Your Char- At first glance, the marriage show was so successful was that it pation. There won’t just be poetry acter, the second annual videogame of the themes of poetry and video injected that degree of entertain- either. There will be comedy, music, poetry show. games may seem strange, but Jones ment back into the medium. performance, and consoles through Maybe we’re supposed to learn that The show was originally con- and company don’t think so. “Something people, unfortu- the ages.” in life, ceived over dinner by the 2009 “When you look at it, we’ve nately, forget sometimes about high scores don’t make you a better Victoria slam poetry team, says poet all grown up with video games,” poetry is that it’s supposed to be en- Select Your Character person... Scott Jones. says Jones. “When we perform, tertainment. You’re not supposed to And that only by exploring, “I had a poem that was essential- we’re performing our own personal go to a poetry reading and be bored 7:30 pm, Monday ly an open letter to [Halo character] narratives. It’s these characters, to tears. It’s supposed to excite, and November29 do we become stronger... Master Chief, and paralleled the nar- these themes that resonate with provoke, and entertain,” he says. Victoria Event Centre Because sometimes all you need rative of Halo to various events and us. Whether you’re playing Super “That’s what this show is trying facebook.com/ in life is a crappy blue candle and a things in my life,” explains Jones. Mario or Splinter Cell they speak to to do,” he continues, “bring it back notyourgrandmaspoetry burning sense of adventure. “I think people do that with a lot of us in a critical time in our develop- into that realm of pure entertain-

GirlsMonday NightNite Out!! Music Bingo + + + Music Themed Martinis $5.00 + + + Start Time 7:30 pm & LIQUOR STORE În£äÊ-  "1, Ê-/, /ÊUÊÓxä‡ÇÓ£‡ÓÎÎÇ 14 ARTS November 17, 2010 Wil takes the rock time machine to 1975 Dylan Wilks Hermann’s Jazz Club. It’s the first Contributing Writer date of his Wil-1975 Tour, which If Wil Mimnaugh had his way, thematically harkens back to the he wouldn’t even record albums. pre-internet era, where in order to The acoustic guitarist, better get your music out there you relied known as Wil, prefers live per- heavily on word of mouth. formances as his primary means Mimnaugh looks up to a band of reaching audiences. he listened to during his youth, “I guess I’m just a simple person Iron Maiden, and how they played when it comes down to what I want to over two million people in 2008 to do,” says Mimnaugh, who lives and 2009 for inspiration on this way just outside Qualicum Beach. “I love of doing things. getting in my truck and I love load- “They achieved this feat by ing it up. I love the tactile nature of performing live—without radio showing up and thinking, ‘There’s play, without tubes and tweets, this the stage, plug in, sing a song, and band personally connected to every see if anyone cares.’” fan,” says Mimnaugh. “They just fucking played, and they killed it every time.” “It’s no longer 15 Despite his love of music in the pre-internet age, Mimnaugh is now minutes of fame. Now using technology as a new means to it’s 15 seconds.” reach people. “It’s fantastic. It’s an amazing wil tool,” says Mimnaugh, “I use Gar- musician ageBand on my laptop to record demos and send them to my man- ager or whoever via MP3s, which I Playing music live in intim- could never have done.” Vancouver Island acoustic-guitar-wielding singer-songwriter and singularly-named dude Wil rocks out. ate settings is where Mimnaugh This kind of instant exposure ing live. Playing live trumps all other “My principle will always be excels—and is exactly where he isn’t without its faults, however, aspects of being a musician for reaching people by being in front wants to be. which Mimnaugh realizes. Mimnaugh; it’s all about the energy of them,” says Mimnaugh. “My Wil “Personally, that’s my favour- “It’s no longer 15 minutes of the show and the audience. He least favourite process in all of this Thursday, November 18 ite,” says Mimnaugh. “I’d opt for of fame,” he says. “Now it’s 15 describes it as a romantic fondness is making records and recording Hermann’s Jazz Club that over anything massive.” seconds.” for something that only exists in things. If I had it my way I’d never $18-20 Mimnaugh’s latest tour be- But the internet doesn’t distract the moment, and once it finishes is record a record. I’d just fucking ibreakstrings.com gins in Victoria on November 18 at from Mimnaugh’s passion for play- lost forever. play shows.”

JosephCurtain and CHALK diverse playCall displays Adam Holroyd Contributing Writer d sum e CHALK, a production of Wil- liam Head Onstage (WHoS), which has been giving inmates of William Head Institution the opportunity to become involved in theatre for 49 shows, challenges what we think of as theatre. The show has no plot, no dia- logue, and little in the way of set or costumes. Stripping away the layers of artifice normally associ- ated with the medium highlights what remains. Chalk it up to anonymity. The cast of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat get gleeful. The seven actors on stage are dressed all in white, and doused often find in everyday objects. ED sum With shades of Jim Steinman in white chalk. The chalk has the One of the most remarkable Contributing Writer (Bat out of Hell, “Total Eclipse of dual effect of rendering the players aspects of the piece, and a credit to The Sooke Harbour Play- the Heart”) influence in the early anonymous, almost archetypal, but director Ingrid Hansen, is that it ers has a kind of magic in their musical scores, the question isn’t also bringing attention to the actors’ wasn’t at all apparent that almost hands. Joseph and the Amazing who deserves credit in turning a bib- eyes and mouth and exaggerating none of the actors had any previ- Technicolour Dreamcoat is one of lical story into a non-stop musical their expressions. Without the ous theatre experience. Only one those shows that brings a touch of number, but just how many musical distractions of plot and dialogue, all had done shows with WHoS in the charm, a yearning of innocence, genres are explored during the show. that’s left is the sheer emotive power past, but the nature of this piece and a harmony that you can’t stop Everything old is new again of human physicality, exploring the completely evened the stage. whistling to at the end of the day. and the Sooke Harbour Players themes of innocence, exploration, This play certainly isn’t every- Joe Scheurel as Joseph really nicely recreate the Broadway and loneliness. one’s game. It’s a challenging piece starts to show his singing diversity spectacle into a simpler form by The show largely focused on of work that isn’t so much watched mid-act. making the venue part of the stage. the actors as children; playing, as it is experienced. But for anyone The best song is not “Any Dream To enjoy this production, you just learning, and interacting, with the who’s looking for a thought-provok- Will Do,” it’s “Potiphar.” Scheurel need a magic carpet ride to get out exuberance of innocence. Soon ing and, more importantly, emotion- emotes more in this tune than any to Sooke. after the opening scene, a mass of ally provoking show, spend some other, and the rest of the cast does old hardcover books was slid on to time behind bars and support this their best, sometimes giving that the stage. The “children” are at first truly unique theatre experience. gaze and special nuance that’s Joseph and the confused, but soon begin working needed to carry the performance Amazing Technicolour out uses for the books, none of further. Dreamcoat which involve reading them. And Matt Geiger as Pharoah CHALK The books are ripped, hoarded, isn’t to be outclassed for those November 19-21, $12-20 November 18-20 thrown, and worn, which is at first audiences already familiar with the Sooke Community Theatre disconcerting, but reminds the William Head Institution tale by Andrew Lloyd Webber and facebook. audience of the imagination and snafu.liquidbeat.com Tim Rice (Jesus Christ Superstar). com/sookeharbourplayers the limitless potential that children nexusnewspaper.com [email protected] ARTS 15 The Friday Quiz offers entertainment

Carol-Lynne Michaels

Contributing writer i cha el s

What happens 52 times a year, e m

features arbitrary questions, and ynn makes a man sing ’80s songs using rol-l

only cat noises? The Friday Quiz at ca Fort Street Cafe. Boeing the Icarus of airplanes “It’s a surreal quiz show,” says quizmaster and Fort Street Cafe Legends of Flight co-owner Benji Coey. “I want to offer more than what’s available for Victoria’s nightlife. The quiz is ★★★★★ a different way of going out.” Pub quizzes sprouted up in the UK during the ’70s; the Fort Street Ed Sum quiz night is two years old, and Contributing Writer although Coey says it took about Although Boeing made a bid to four months to catch on, it’s now a send passengers into outer-space popular local activity. orbit by 2015, what they really do is build planes. The IMAX format is appropriate to give viewers a sense of just how large these passenger “It’s a great way to go planes are. Unlike the usual 45-minute out on Friday without IMAX show, viewers are given spending way too a hefty 90-minute treatise about much money and man’s quest to fly like the birds. And while mankind’s reach for the waking up hung over.” Benji Coey of the Fort Sreet Cafe loves quizzes... and rotary phones. heavens is impressive, flying like michael smith chael Smith. “People are friendly a good way—some in an arbitrary Icarus is not without some massive former camosun student and there’s a competitive element, a way.” hurdles. Mike Carriker, the chief test Yup, those are airplanes, alright. humorous level of competition. It’s The quiz goes far beyond geog- pilot for Boeing, carefully narrates ledging their competitor, Airbus. a great way to go out on Friday with- raphy, math, and music. Players this film with that sense of under- There’s plenty of detail to give Coey takes the stage around out spending way too much money might count scrabble word scores, standing. He also talks about what viewers a peek into what happens nine o’clock on quiz night and sets and waking up hung over.” order things chronologically, guess inspired him to fly. down in Boeing’s HQ, located in a swift pace for the night. The cafe Smith’s team was the first team country populations, or recall recent With his training as a Navy test Everett, Washington. But if the reaches capacity about an hour prior to ever win two quiz nights con- news topics. pilot, he comes from good pedigree movie stayed focused more on Car- to the show. The setting includes the secutively. They came away with “It’s about taking the piss out and it’s his dedication that carries riker’s inspirations, it’d be more of a classic red curtain, vintage appeal, the prize booty, plus discounted of knowledge,” says Coey. “Know- the film. humanist story than one of techno- British accents, and a selection of admission to all future quizzes. ledge is a perception. It’s an illusion. But he’s not the only star of the logical innovation, which would local micro-brews. “They’re not trying to make it The Friday Quiz is a show. I want show—that’s Boeing saying how make it resound more powerfully “It has a laid-back atmosphere,” an intellectual night,” says Smith. to keep it like a show. A stupid, fun great they are while briefly acknow- with audiences. says former Camosun student Mi- “Some of the quiz is challenging in show.” 16 ARTS November 17, 2010 No T&A for new men’s site TMG Nick Spector “With TMG, we wanted to cre- to the 6,000 it’s averaging now. ArenaRock The Eyeopener (Ryerson University) ate a site where people who didn’t Although there’s some com- r s TORONTO (CUP)—Phil Ad- know what to do or what that end petition, it pales in comparison to Ozzy Osbourne u re rien and Gavin Seal were tired of all goal was or how to get there could what’s available for female audi- Save-on-Foods Memorial the “tits and ass” they saw in men’s come and just have a conversation,” ences. Women’s lifestyle sites are a Centre

lifestyle publications. says Adrien. fast-growing market, but there are jas o n sch Frustrated with the lack of real And so the website lives up to few options for men and even fewer November 12 and down-to-earth coverage of its name, informing the young, still for the younger crowd. GREG PRATT men’s lifestyle topics, the Ryerson chivalrous man on how to deal with “Women are much more open STAFF writer University graduates launched a situations he’ll encounter during the about their feelings and are much Some strange things happened website called The Modern Gentle- transition from student to young more apt to share that in an online when metal icon Ozzy Osbourne man (TMG) instead. professional—all while looking af- space,” says Adrien. “It’s much hit the arena recently. Since this past spring, TMG fordably stylish and up-to-date with more challenging for a guy to go, For example, I was standing in the drink line when an older has catered to an audience of young the most recent technology. ‘Let’s have a real conversation Ozzy came, Ozzy conquered. men; some are students, others about money,’ which is a very taboo couple approached the guy behind are professionals, and many are subject, but it’s something that we me and asked if he was looking for But the strangest occurrence of transitioning from the former to “It just seemed like all think about, right?” some fun after the show. The man the night was that Ozzy, now 250 the latter. But, most importantly, it’s the of the couple said, as casually as if years old, put on a great show. Though there are plenty of everything was open nature of TMG’s contributors he was asking for the time, that the Opener Rob Halford, of Judas women’s lifestyle websites for the catering towards these that has helped it stand out from woman was looking for a golden Priest, did a great job as well, play- younger crowd, TMG targets a niche other men’s lifestyle websites and shower. ing a solid set of material touching market that conventional lifestyle guys that went out and magazines. Later, still in line for a drink, on most of his musical projects. publications like GQ and Esquire had wild sex every In an age where every publi- an obscenely drunk and haggard Osbourne also had a great tend to ignore. cation has a Twitter feed and a woman cut in front of me, and, backing band, who tore through an “It just seemed like everything night.” Facebook page, Adrien and Seal somehow, accused me of cutting excellent, high-energy set of Black Sabbath and Ozzy classics. was catering towards these guys phil adrien say that appearing connected only in front of her. that went out and had wild sex every the modern gentleman goes so far; an actual connection We stared at each other; she And they are classics: a sea of night,” says Adrien, TMG’s founder is what makes the difference, and looked frail, like a rocker ghost. thirtysomethings were practically and CEO. that’s exactly what they’re striving Suddenly, Ozzy’s set started; we rooting around looking for the “They drink the most expensive “We met up and started talking for with TMG. both smiled. I, inexplicably, said, tit of ‘80s hard rock to suckle on champagne, wear the most expen- about things we were experiencing “What we feel is our greatest ac- “It’s all good for Ozzy,” and nudged when some of those keyboard sive suits, drive the most expensive in that stage of our life; that transi- complishment is the user response. her, in her upper chest. tones dropped. cars and it’s, like, when you gradu- tional period between education and We’ll go to sites like Ask Men or She smiled, closed her eyes, We make fun of Ozzy because ate and you’re making a salary for the real world; between studying GQ and we’ll see articles that have and… just stood there. About 10 he’s buggered, but, really, we laugh the first time in your life, those are and working,” explains Seal. no re-tweets or no comments and seconds passed; I didn’t know because he’s cheated death and we not realistic expectations.” The pair focused on less obvious with our site we are getting some what to do. I just kept staring at can only hope to be so lucky; it’s a What sets TMG apart from big issues, like whether or not to add incredible feedback,” says Seal. her eyes, which were shut so tight it nervous laugh, and it’s a jealous publications like GQ, Esquire, and your boss on Facebook, or how to “To us that’s the difference between looked like they would never open laugh. Details is more than just its younger develop professional relationships. people that just skim your articles again, shut forever to the amazing, Don’t die yet, Ozzy, you crazy, demographic, but also the way it As a result, TMG has grown from and people who are actually dedi- transcendental sounds of Ozzy’s lovable old bat. We still need you. approaches its audience. 1,000 visitors per month at launch cated readers.” “Bark at the Moon.” Music still needs you. Noise Addict BY ALLI PICKARD Singers and screamers With many genres of music come many types of singers. In heavy metal it’s usually a screamer; with rock it’s usually a singer. But there are the odd ones who have the talent to do both; when that happens it’s a wonderful shock to find out the person who’s doing the crushing brutal screams can also sing harmonious melodies. Canadian metal band Threat Signal (myspace.com/threatsignal) shows that you don’t have to be just a grunting beast to be heavy. Singer Jon Howard’s vocals on songs like “Vigilance” are harsh when needed, but get melodic to change things up. Tracks like “Through My Eyes” and “Severed” show off his amaz- ing vocal range. The finger-pick- Anders Friden of In Flames. ing guitar work is a nice technical Anders Friden, vocalist of Swed- change of pace to all the brutality, ish melodic death metal crew In and it still manages to keep a solid Flames (myspace.com/inflames), beat going. is a legend in the metal scene when Hailing from Chicago, IL, Soil it comes to mastering a balance (myspace.com/soil) has proved between clean vocals and scream- time and time again that heavy is ing (and rocking dreadlocks). On in the eye of the beholder. After their 2006 release, Come Clarity, their 2001 release, Scars, the band songs like “Crawl Through Knives” exploded onto the scene with their and “Take This Life” highlight the mix of heavy rock and roll. Their fact that after over 20 years in the song “Halo” hit heavy rotation industry Friden can still belt it out on rock stations that year and has better than any 18-year-old gar- become one of the hardest-hitting age-band wannabe. For longtime songs of all time. Its lyrics and beat fans, this album was a melodic and make you just want to grab someone catchy turn for the worse from the and make out with them; this is most heavy band they had grown to love, likely not its original intentions, but taken out of context this group but the temptation to do so is very put forth one amazing set of music strong after listening to it. with Come Clarity. [email protected] COLUMNS 17

, Worth the Trip? #:
/BPNJ
,BWLB The battle of on-campus and off-campus eats These past two weeks I’ve eaten a

BY SHAWN O’HARA AND ALEX PASK k av

a lot of stew; I needed a break from i k m

such hearty cooked food. I’d been o on a fresh-salsa bender all sum- na Campus Café mer, and I feared this deliciousness would end with the warm weather. Lansdowne campus Thankfully, my mom came to visit Chicken Caesar Wrap last month and bought a flat of to- matoes and a sack of avocados for $6.26 me. I honestly don’t think I can eat them all fast enough, so I’ve been keeping up by making fresh salsa and bruschetta. If you have fresh goods, like tomatoes, cucumbers, and avocados, at risk of going bad, salsas are a great way to consolidate Presentation and service all those foods into one delicious, Alex: The Camosun Cafeteria has more options if you know to ask for them; it’s the delicious package. Avocado is chock Fight Club of Camosun. I step up to the grill and, squinting, I ask for the super-se- full of very heart-friendly and skin- cret Caesar wrap that isn’t on the menu. friendly oils, plus it adds a lot of rich Shawn: It’s hard to criticize the service here, since it’s so consistently mediocre. colour and texture to many meals! They look at you like you’re a floating $20 bill instead of a person. But, hey, I look My favourite thing to eat with salsa at them like they’re an Easy-Bake Oven, so it’s a fair trade. This wrap looks all fresca? Burritos! right. Not good, just all right. Filling: salt and pepper to taste. If you’re When I Die, Burrito Me Low Taste feeling adventurous add a bit of • 1 cup black beans, soaked, spice. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, A: The wrap is a whole lot of dry chicken laced with lettuce and huge chunks of What you’ll need: tomato. I think there is some faint amount of Caesar dressing, but I’m not sure. cooked, and drained heat a skillet and place in a tortilla Maybe they just smiled and nodded when I ordered because they knew they were • shredded cheese shell with a sprinkling of cheese. going to make us something else. Salsa: • sour cream Keep the heat below medium, and once the cheese has melted, fill shell S: I think when we said “Caesar Chicken Wrap” they heard, “Make whatever kind • tortilla shells of wrap you want then set it next to a Caesar salad.” I’m not even sure what I’m • 1 large or 2 medium tomatoes, with beans, salsa, and sour cream. eating. I mean, it tastes fine. It’s just that it doesn’t really taste like anything finely diced Combine all ingredients for the You can also put some extra sprigs special. • 1/2 large red onion salsa and stir together in a med- of cilantro in. If that’s not up your • 1/2 cucumber, finely diced ium-sized bowl. To reduce extra alley, lettuce or spinach are tasty alternatives. • 1 red bell pepper, finely diced fluid, after dicing the tomato and cucumber, place them on 2–3 paper Tasty Tip: Dice a whole, ripe The Urban Cup • 2 cloves garlic, finely diced towels or cheesecloth and squeeze avocado into the salsa. The lime juice of 1/2 a lime 3690 Shelbourne • out the extra water. Set aside salsa. juice usually keeps the avocado • 1/4 cup chopped cilantro (op- Take cooked black beans and reheat fresh. Or slice it thin and put it in Street tional) in a saucepan. Using a large spoon your burrito for an extra buttery Chipotle Chicken • 2 tsp chili powder or potato masher squish the beans texture and a nice healthy dose of salt and pepper to taste Caesar Wrap • so they make a consistent paste. Add vitamin E. $7.25

Presentation and service A: If you were born before 1940, this is the place for you! The café was like a pep rally for grey hairs. Service was distracted, but did the job. I wanted to eat every- Call us on it! thing listed on the menu. S: The service was pretty good, if not a little disinterested. The food makes up Nexus writers are a lively bunch that like to express their for it, though. This wrap says quality. It smells good, and looks good, with bright, fresh ingredients. points of view. Now we want to hear yours. Did any of our articles spark your interest or get you riled up? Tell Taste us what you thought in 250 words or less, e-mail your A: This is a mighty good wrap. The chipotle sauce is a welcomed flavour thrown in with the usual Caesar wrap ingredients. They added a pickle as a garnish, but the letters to Nexus, and we’ll reprint them. Give our writers pickle juice leaked all over the plate and soaked the bottom half of the wrap. I gave the soggy bit to Shawn. a piece of your mind! S: It was dense, but not too filling, and the Caesar dressing wasn’t too overpower- ing. It was a little cold, but I think that was the point.

And the winner is... The Urban Cup Verdict It’s just a quick bus ride up Shelbourne, and although it’s almost a dollar more, the wrap at The Urban Cup is infinitely better.W e love you, Chipotle Caesar Wrap. Run away with us.

Dunlop House PUB NIGHT

250-370-3591 Nov. 18 [email protected] Casino Royale nexusnewspaper.com 4–6 pm Off Lansdowne Road, beside the staff parking lot 18 COLUMNS November 17, 2010

The Electric Bungalow First person,plural by Ed Sum #:
1BN
0MJWFS

Getting an earful consider a pair of active noise- Surviving the big one is easy—with Did you know we could chal- pastry from a stainless steel gas canceling headphones. These a little luck and a plan. lenge the themes and strategies this range. devices require a power source demon of modern society seeks to The inner stuff is harder to deal When it comes to a good pair of and have a button to filter out When I think of the big one, impose on us at this time of year? with, of course. The good news is, headphones, people can either wear the ambient noise of anything I envision two things. The first is I have only my own holiday habits if we have feelings we don’t like tiny earbuds or look like Princess from a bus to that party next the earthquake when we all surf to to draw from, and the following about this time of the year we can Leia. No headphones can improve door. Denver. The second is the month notions are just to get you started. challenge them. After all, they are a low-quality mp3, but when you • Want surround sound? You’ll heading into the Christmas holi- Feel free to pack your suitcase with our feelings! We can do what we know the source is good, it’s time have to dig up a lot of hard- days. A quake is survivable pretty your own ideas. like with them. It takes practice... to find a pair that performs. earned cash for Sennheiser’s much only by the luck of where you Who says we have to shop in and slowing things down. • Remember those buds that RS 130 Wireless set. Video happen to be standing when it hits, the malls after December 1? And And, finally, there’s the old came with your music player? gamers will want to check out but December can be completely why can’t we cook the turkey, or problem of the legacy thing. This Ditch them. They’re low-quality Zalman’s ZM-RS6F. avoided. faux-turkey, the day before we have requires a bit of mental reframing, pieces of crap. • If you’re looking to really head- There’s no use denying it— our main holiday meal? but if there’s a tradition that’s bur- • Bud-style headphones don’t bang, you’ll want to consider Christmas is on its way, relentless Did you know you don’t have densome it can be deconstructed always do a good job of filtering purchasing some cupped head- as an addiction and, for the unpre- to wait until December 25 to open and rearranged into a modern out external noises. Custom-fit phones; they offer the widest pared, just as dangerous. But it’s your gifts? Or who says that it’s not miracle. pairs do a better job. range of sound. not too early. Best to face it and a real holiday (and that we should Put yourself in the driver’s seat • Some stores have demo units to • Good brand names to keep in metaphorically get the big suitcase feel sorry for ourselves) if we don’t and kick Santa to the backseat for plug your music player to. Try mind when headphone shop- out. The one with the wheels. get together with our family of a change. them in-store before buying. ping are Bose, Sennheiser, and We’ll need to pack a few essen- origin? This year, why not gentle your- Panasonic. • Sennheiser’s PX100 are a good tials and keep our heads—because Apartments and rooming hous- self into the season and start your example of lightweight travel- For my Electric Bungalow web all the normals are about to lose es can produce steaming-hot Amy’s holiday now? Scale the sadness ling headphones. exclusive weekly column, go to whatever tiny grip they have on Pies from a microwave that taste back and make it a good time of year • When living with roommates, nexusnewspaper.com. theirs. every bit as good as hand-rolled that speaks to no one else but you.

Green your world By Luke Holland

DIY learning: Transition Victoria 7 pm: I just got home from the high-priority for hospital staff. And Samantha and I make out for a bit most expensive liquor store on fair enough—looking around, I see before joining everyone. Erin Sanderson in “transition towns” that strive to Earth. It’s Monday night and the people who look like they stepped 11:59: I’m inside Lucky and that Camosun Students for move from oil dependence to local gang and I are going to ’90s Night off the set of 28 Days Later. I look “Mambo #5” song is playing. I’m Environmental Awareness resilience. at Lucky Bar. I put my $17 mickey at my finger, then at Hollywood. belligerently drunk and my bandage The term DIY, which stands for So what would need to change of Smirnoff in the freezer. “Screw this. Let’s go to ‘90s Night,” is flopping around loosely. do it yourself, means just that—it’s if we weren’t dependent on oil? 7:02: I slice my index finger I say. He agrees. I check out of the 12:34 am: Samantha and I are all about doing things yourself. A lot. open trying to sponge crusted hospital. dancing and I’m barely keeping it This might mean looking at That’s why Transition Victoria cheese off my roommate’s sharp- 9:32: Hollywood, Adora, Sam- together. I look at her, trying to un- your needs for food, transportation, has interest groups that meet to as-fuck butcher knife. There’s blood antha, and I are waiting in line cross my eyes. “Where do I know tools, shelter, and clothes and then discuss a wide range of topics, in- everywhere. outside Lucky. A makeshift bandage you from?” I slur. She is justifiably seeing how you, along with others in cluding re-skilling (sharing skills for 7:04: I’m standing over the bath- is taped droopily around my finger. offended; justifiable because I’ve your community, can work together a resilient future), food, reduction room sink bleeding. The cascade We get our stamps and return home known Samantha for over 10 years. to meet those needs in a way that’s and reuse, green energy, education of life fluid draining out of me will for pre-drinking and foosball. She takes off and ends up hooking not dependent on something else and child development, water, shel- not stop. I yell for Hollywood to 10:11: I discover it’s extremely up with an unfairly good-looking like, say, oil. ter and housing, and even heart and take me to the hospital so I can get challenging playing foosball with a hockey player. Transition Victoria is a local vol- soul (change isn’t easy). stitches. tampon bound around my finger. I Result: Opportunity missed. unteer-run group that’s part of the If any of this is at all interesting, 7:26: With my finger wrapped concentrate on swigging my over- What did Luke learn today? larger global grassroots movement take a moment to visit Transition up in about 19 paper towels, I check priced vodka. Drinking heavily after losing lots known as The Transition Move- Victoria’s website at www.tran- myself in to emergency. The bleed- 10:55: Samantha and I are flirt- of blood is not a good idea. ment. The Transition Movement is sitionvictoria.ning.com to have a ing has temporarily subsided. ing by the fireplace. What do you think? spreading across the world, primar- look at some of their events, blogs, 8:42: The wound to my digit 11:21: The group consensus is [email protected] ily in the UK and North America, or working groups. doesn’t seem to be an injury deemed that it’s time to go back to Lucky. or TEXTBACK to 604–223–0076. Look for web-exclusive content on the Nexus website. nexusnewspaper.com nexusnewspaper.conexusnewspaper.comm Quick Bites The Electric Bungalow The Dating Diaries Exclusive reviews and articles nexusnewspaper.com nexusnewspaper.conexusnewspaper.comm [email protected] HUMOUR 19

Norma Jean By Jenna Cotton Campus Callosum By Pam Oliver

You draw comics and we know it!

If you think you might be able to make folks laugh with a short Norma Jean By Jenna Cotton Off-kilter Subjects By Jordan Venoit comic every other week, then we’d like to see your work in print — almost as much as you’d like to see it in print. It’s how Doonesbury got its start. Really.

Submit samples to: Nexus, 201 Richmond House, Lansdowne Campus, or email: [email protected]

250-370-3591 [email protected] nexusnewspaper.com Richmond House 201, Lansdowne

Camosun College Sexual Health Centre

in the Richmond House on the Top Floor (Lansdowne Campus on Richmond Road next to the daycare) Clinic Times for Male/Female STD Services Female Sexual Health and Birth Control Thursdays

1:30 - 4:30pm Other Clinic Locations and Hours Available at: Victoria --250-592-3479 Saanich Peninsula --250-544-2424 250-592-3449 West Shore --250-888-6814 i s l a n d s e x u a l h e a l t h . o r g eye on campus

By Erin Ball By Erin Ball

Wednesday, November 17 Wednesday, November 17 Curtis Eller Camosun Ukulele Sing- Intrepid Theatre Club, 8 PM, $11 ers Circle Yodelling banjo player from New This uke circle is on the first and York, Curtis Eller, brings his music third Wednesday of each month. and moustache back to Victoria for Beginners are welcome and can a special exclusive performance at borrow a ukulele to try it out. BCBGMAXAZRIA Intrepid Theatre. Fresh from a tour Seasoned players are encouraged of Norwegian schools, Eller will to bring their uke, music stand, be playing his bluegrass-infused and tuner. The night will begin with Mexx and Mexx Kids old-time tunes. Sporadic yodelling, half an hour of learning chords and acrobatics, and strong language the next hour and a half will be for Melanie Lyne should be expected at this concert. playing and singing. Admission is Saturday, November 20 $2 for the public and $1 for stu- dents. Check out camosun-ukulele- The Children’s Place Forestry, Run River, Sun- singers.tumblr.com for locations hawk, Adam Barter and more information. Moores Clothing For Men Sugar Nightclub, 10 pm, $10 Thursday, November 18 Indie-folk quartet Forestry brings their heartfelt jams to Sugar Night- Symbolism and Rock Art: Urban Barn club. Backing them up will be local Understanding the Uni- NOW rock trio Sunhawk, who are fresh from a second-place finish at UVic’s versal Human Language Battle of the Bands this year, as well What does it mean to be human? Megson FitzPatrick as Run River from Vancouver, and UVic graduate student Genevieve OPEN solo acoustic artist Adam Barter. von Petzinger has been doing research on prehistoric cave and Walmart Sunday, November 21 rock art in France and presents her research at the Nellie McClung Best Buy The Outspoken branch of the Greater Victoria Wordsmiths Public Library from 7:30–8 pm. Solstice Café, 7:30 pm, $5-$15 Register online at gvpl.ca. Shoppers Drug Mart Beat boxers and political poets The Outspoken Wordsmiths wrap Tuesday, November 23 up their Canadian Cross Pollina- Job Search: What Do You Future Shop tion tour in Victoria with a show at the Solstice Café. This high-energy Want to Do When You duo has garnered a reputation as Grow Up? Candy Cures a versatile, crowd-pleasing act that This workshop, held by the mixes spoken word with spontan- Camosun student employment eous beat-box and rhyme sessions. department, will help interested Cupcakes, Qoola Frozen Yogurt Bar, Soho Boutique, They’ve toured extensively across students develop a plan for a job Canada, in every type of venue search after graduation. Dana OPEN Sweet Nancy’s, Jackpot, Optiks, Jacob, Willie’s Bakery, imaginable, bringing their political Tremblay, executive search consult- beats directly to the people. ant with Boyden Global Executive The Noodle Box, Medi Spa Search, will discuss traditional and SOON Friday, November 26 non-traditional methods of how to Alexisonfire, Norma Jean, look for work. The workshop is free and takes place from 4–5:30 pm at La Dispute the Lansdowne campus in Fisher Club 9ONE9, 6:30 pm, $37.50 310. To register, visit employ@ Juno award winners Alexisonfire camosun.bc.ca. kick off their Canadian tour in Everyone looks good Victoria with an early show at Club Friday, November 26 90NE9. Touring in support of their new EP, Dog’s Blood, this is the Fund Freeset, Fuel band’s first major headlining tour Freedom since the release of Old Crows/ The geography students at Young Cardinals in 2009. Norma Camosun are hosting a fundraiser Jean, a trailblazing metalcore band to benefitF reeset, a fair-trade in a voting booth. from Atlanta, and La Dispute from business that offers employment Grand Rapids open the show. to women who have been driven by poverty or sold into prostitution. Friday, November 26 The event features a performance Marcus Visionary, Slim by local folk musician Mike Edel, a Pickins, Tedder guest speaker from Freeset, and a presentation from the geography Victoria Votes Hush Nightclub, 10 pm, $16.75 students. It takes place at Lambrick Marcus Visionary has been around Park Church from 7–9 pm and since the dawn of the rave scene in admission is only $10. Visit freeset- Toronto and is now one of Canada’s global.com to check out the bags most accomplished drum and bass and learn more. DJs. Slim Pickins from Calgary will be bringing his bassy beats and lo- Tuesday, November 30 cal DJ, Tedder, will be pumping out Saturday, some smooth drum and bass. More than Just a Game: Marketing and Selling Saturday, November 27 Sports as Entertainment Jason Collett, Al Tuck In this workshop, Roxann Bury, Lucky Bar, 7 pm, $16 general manager for the recently Recently nominated for a CBC Radio defunct Victoria Seals baseball November 3 Bucky Award for Most Canadian club talks about her career. Pick Song, Toronto singer/songwriter up some tips for applying for a Jason Collett will hit the Lucky Bar position in professional sports. stage. Although Collett is a member Bury will also talk about volunteer of Broken Social Scene, he’s made opportunities in sports. The work- five solo albums since 2001.F olk shop takes place from 4–5:30 pm Voting places open 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. singer Al Tuck made his name in at the Lansdowne campus in Fisher the mid-nineties in Halifax, playing 310. To register, visit employ@ alongside bands like Sloan. camosun.bc.ca. Classifieds FREE EYEBROW THREADING with Brazilian $37. Specializing in waxing and threading. Fernwood Holistic Health Care Centre. Only by appointment. 250–507–7174.

GUARANTEED TIRES from $10. New and used tires and auto repairs. discounttires- autorepairs.com 250-412-7300.

GUIDELINES Each registered student at Camosun is eligible for up to 40 words FREE per semester. This can be in the form of a 40-word ad or two 20-word ads. Drop off your ad at Nexus, Richmond House 201, Lansdowne, email it to [email protected], or call the ad in at 250-370- 3591. Please include your student number and contact information. Small print: Nexus reserves www.victoria.ca the right to refuse ads for any reason. No sexist, racist, homophobic, or otherwise derogatory or slanderous ads. Business-related ads are $15 for 20 words or less. 50 cents per extra word.