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~ ~ \ ~ :: H~5:o \ \6~ :;-" )...-.; :: § ; ~ \ <:: UJ ~ § <\~~. ~:.~7 ' jL~ § . » § :: ' ~, ~ -: ' .' I _ ~ • :: ~ Vol. 6 Issue 2 April 23, 1976 Marion, Ohio ~A1t\O I .,.~~~.~~~~~~~~.~~~.~~~~~~~~J~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~.~~~~~~~.~~~~.~~.~~~~.~.~~~.~~~~~~~~~.~.~ - ~= "Not-50-Famous F.·rsts" ..r •• r···::-:U~:·3:~~:;:..;h:·;r:·:·t:::i~ ;: SPRING mail wagon was made there in 1899. The first unassisted triple play came in a frem ·o world series game. The first kindergarten Oh. for crippled children came about in 1900. FLING Electric lighting came to the city streets to U.S. Suprene Court and 35 cabinet of Cleveland on April 22, 1879. The first officials. Ohio has not been famous for firework legislation came about there in by Dave Coulson political families, but the Tafts from July of 1908. Paint was first made from INFECTS Cincinnatti are an exception. William standard formulas there in 1880. In 1914, The majority of the students here at Howard Taft is the only person to serve the Plain Dealer was the first newspaper OSUM are Ohio residents, like myself, as chief justice of the Supreme Court and to publish a section using the rotogravure CAMPUS but I wonder how many do not really also serve as President. His father had method. The first political convention know that many of the things we do been secretary of war under Grant and broadcast came from Cleveland by radio A SPRING FLING will occur on which everyone in the country takes for also his Attorney General. After that he on June 10, 1924. In 1895, the first brick campus tonight from 9 till 1. granted now, got their start here in Ohio. was the U.S. minister to Russia and pavement of a rural road came near The Campus Council for Student Ohioans have led the way in politics and Austria-Hungary. His son, Robert A., Cleveland. The first operation that Activities is the sponsor. Don Hallar is the many stages of education. I uncovered served in the U.S. senate from 1939 to successfully separated Siamese twins coordinator. several interesting facts that I'll tell you 1953 and his Grandson, Robert A., Jr. (then living for at least 1 year) came in The rock group "Nyte Syke" will be about now; if you have heard of others was elected to the Senate and is currently Cleveland in 1952. Electric traffic signals here to entertain while bodies are and would drop them off in the Wick serving there. In 1968, Cleveland was the were first used there on Aug. 5, 1914. "boogie-ing down." office, they will be considered for fu tu re first major U.S. city to elect a Black The prohibition party had their first There will be beer sold by the Ski editions of the paper. mayor, Carl Stokes. On Jan. 6, 1885, the national convention in Cleveland on Feb. Club. As students in higher education, we first Black state legislator was elected in 22, 1872. . This dance shows promise of a should be especially interested in the role Ohio. On the personal side of the topic In Dayton, the first cash register was real-honest, well-put-together affair. that Ohio has played in the education of Ohio presidents, Wm. McKinley was patented by J. J. Ritty on Nov. 4, 1879. So - if you think a SPRING FLING business. Ohio State University was the the first president to use a telephone for The first ethyl gas was marketed on Feb. will give you what your spirit needs ­ first state-supported institution of higher campaigning. The Hardings were the first 2, 1923. The first aviator to leave a COME ON OUT! education west of the Allegheny family to die within an elected term of disabled plan by a parachute was H.R . •J'••••••••••••6'~•••_ . Mountains. OSU is the largest contempor­ office. Politically, the Greenbacker party Harris on Oct. 20, 1922. And the first HELPI ary state-assisted university in the was organized in Toledo on Feb. 22, country helicopter flight landed on May country, having the highest undergrad­ 1878. Also politically, it should be 17, 1942 from Stratford, Connecticut. contacts are still needed for Outside uate enrollment. Oberlin College, Oberlin noted that Ohio is split evenly between In Toledo, the first all-glass, help at the Marion coursework Ohio, established in 1833 is the first co­ the two parties today and is a major spot windowless building was completed on Institution-Penitentiary Correctional educational college in the U.S. and was for national politicking. Jan. 15, 1936. The first state employ­ College Program. one of the first to admit Blacks. Antioch Several Ohio cities have several accom­ ment service office was opened in 1890. Help is needed any evening - any College, established in 1852, is the oldest plishments to themselves. The citizens of The first bowler to achieve a perfect 300 between 5:30 and 8 :30 p.rn, in: MATH, experimental liberal arts college in the Akron for instance, had the first police score in a American Bowling Congress ENGLISH, ANTHRO, SOC, and PSYCH. country. This school is in Yellow Springs, patrol wagon in 1899. They also are Tournament was Wm. Know in March of Please call Ernie Loperfido at Ohio and was a forerunner of women's leaders in the tire industry. The first 1913. The first glass-blowing machine was .~ fJ 1J.1J.0!'le_=!8J):.3..sJ~._ _..... •••• ~ .~ .~ • iF.' •••~ •• liberation in the education field. This is clincher tire was made there in 1899, the patented to M.J. · Owens on Feb. 26, the first school to grant women profess­ first cord tire there in 1910, the first non­ 1895. The first American Lutheran MTC DAY AT CEDAR POINT ors the same privileges as the men profs ­ skid tire on Feb. 14, 1914, the first Church was organized there in 1930. The We have acquired two buses which will this happened in Sept. 1852. On Oct. 5, synthetic tire on June 5, 1940 and the first paint spraying device was used in leave the parking lot at 8 a.m. on May 22. 1853, women on campus were given first tubeless tire on May 11, 1947. 1909. The first television receiver to pro­ We will invade a restaurant sometime on absolute equal rights . The first cooed Before they got in the tire business at all, ject a large image was built in Toledo in our journey north for a late breakfast. literary society was formed on that Akron was the first home of a rubber 1955. The first practical TV tube (rec­ company west of the Allegheny The entry fee for Cedar Point is $5.75 per campus. The first physiology and hygiene tangular) was announced there on July Mountains in 1870. That city produced person which entitles you to utilize every­ courses were also taught at that campus 10, 1949. thing inside the park. We have reserved a on that 1853 date. At Miami in OXford, the first oat crushing machine on Nov. When you speak of more basic areas of 30, 1875 and also the first belt conveyor picnic shelter for those who wish to take the first Greek letter fraternity west of the state, individual towns also have con­ over four miles long. a picnic lunch or just plain rest. the Alleghenies was established on July 8, tributed greatly to the accomplishments Cincinnati has to its credit the first I -have no specific details on the 1839. Mount Union College in 1870 set of the state as a whole. The first hospital ambulance service and the first evening events at Cedar Point, but there up the first summer school program. Did telephone answering service was used in right-hand-drivemail delivery vehicles. usually are a couple of bands for dancing you know that Ohio University in Athens Ohio in March of 1951. In Fairfield, the and some type of musical show or was the first university in the country to The first major league baseball night game first airplane to fly over 28,000 feet high concert. The buses will leave the park late be supported by a federal land grant? was played there on May 24, 1935. The took off on Sept. 18, 1918. Also the first in the ev~ning. You all can decide when Even below the college level, Ohio can be first woman to become a dentist did so in tintype camera was patented there in Cincinnati on Feb. 21, 1866. The first you want to come home! noted for its advancement in education. 1856 by H.L. Smith. In 1955, Mansfield Money - as I stated before, will be The first high school night classes to be fire department to receive a salary was in produced the first electronic range for $5.75 per person. Each MTC student can taught began in Ohio on March 16, 1829. that city in 1853. The first moving domestic use. Milford appointed the first invite one guest. The total cost will be Ohioans have certainly done their share in picture show (peep show machine) was woman as chief of police in 1914. Mt. patented there on Feb . 5, 1861 by S.D. $10 per person with refreshments provid­ the past to promote education; I hope Vernon was the home of the first man to Goodale. ed and the first 80 people to pay in room this continues in the futu reo patent chewing gum in 1869. The first Cleveland is the Ohio center that has 316 will be going to Cedar Point May 22. Ohio has also made a name for itself in robbery to come to a disabled train the distinction of producing the first Please pay by check. the field of politics. Ohio has given the happened in North Bend in 1865. Port automobile advertisement. It was for the It's going to be a fun day so get your $ federal government 6 presidents, 3 Bucyrus got the first woman airport Winston Motor Car Co. and came about to Room 316 (See Donna or Marge) as presidents, 3 chief and 8 associate justices manager in 1932 while Sandusky was the soon as possible so you're one of the 80. site for the first over-water airplane flight, See you at 8 a.rn. May 22. • _•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• -.J by G.H. Curtis in Aug. of 1910. In ~~.:::.~~~~.:::_~~~~~~~.~ ,.~~~~.~,~~.~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ .. .•...... Schoenbrunn, the first Protestant church TO ALL POETS communion to take place west of Pa. happened on June 9, 1772. The first AND WRITERS school house west of the Allegheny Mts. Don't forget that the deadline for the was constructed in 1773 there, also . Ohio State University Marion Campus Ohio ranks 35th according to size in Literary Awards for 1976 is this coming the U.S., but ranks 6th in population. Monday. Ohio has 260 people per square mile as Anyone can enter - you don't have to compared to the national average of 50/ be a student. sq. mi.. In the 1850's Ohio was first in There is a maximum number of entries the country in Agriculture production; in permitted in each category and it is three. the 1970's, we still rank close to the top. The categories are the poem, the short We are first in the country in sandstone story, and the essay. production and lead the nation in the The manuscripts must be typed and industrial use of water. We from Ohio double spaced. have much to be proud of. Many things Please send them to Dr. Citino in we have today are worth the pride that Room 328. we give them, but many things from our ..-.r.·.·.·.·.:-.~.·.-vv"_-A·.·.·,.~il' ..,.·.·..... past deserve recognition also - be aware Everyman throws a rock now and then "A nd /l OW I want yo u to m eet our compu ter science reacher." of Ohioan's accomplishments from the that he would like to have back in his past! hand. ' , "", ' .., ' ' ...... Everyone is shooting, but no one takes In spite of our troubles, we all do IN AMERICA aim. pretty well. ONLY - Philemon Martin does the vocals in "The WICK-ED Note You Never Wrote." He sounds as LOOKING though he were reciting a poem. "She's My Baby" is a catchy tune. Paul's voice is AlA FROZEN COMMENTS in splendid form on it. An organ solo starts "Beware My Litterbugs beware! An investigative Love." The song evolves from the group POND Al DAWN figure is out to get you. Namely me. as a whole into Paul as a soloist. this morning's ice It seems as though every time I walk "Wino Junko" ends side one. Jimmy is anxious for the sun: our haUs, I see trash everywhere. It's on McCulloch has the vocal honors on this one. the tables, chairs, floor, etc., etc. Every­ it's been lying here where but in the proper place - the trash "" is the best song on th~ al~~. for dark moments can. I know that this problem has not It starts off side two. Every­ watching the gray grown out of the lack of trash cans. thmg IS Just perfect. An orchestra is the sharpen itself I am beginning to believe it is because backgrou nd puts the icing on the cake along that row our students are turning into, or already The sound of an egg frying is the intro of Southern Ohio hills. are slobs. into "Cook Of The House." This is the I sure would hate to see their habitats one rock'n'roll song on the album. Linda does the singing. the wind's twisted, if this is the way they dispose of trash ' at long-nailed hands home. "Time.To Hide" has the catchy Wings sound to It. Denny does the singing again. claw whispers I recently overheard a conversation from a brown, dry vine, between a visitor and a receptionist. It does the vocals on "Must Do Something About It." He is backed went something like the following: yet the misted ice VISITOR (At desk): I have come to by an acoustic guitar and various percussion instruments. reassures me see you about those who live in their own as I stand here offal. "San Ferry Anne" has a flute in the background throughout the song. It is wrapped like a cocoon, RECEPTIONIST: Come again. my breath billowing out VISITOR: About your college reminiscent of "Listen To What The Man Said. " like foundry smoke. students. RECEPTIONIST: Oh! I thought you The album ends with "." This is a McCartney classic. two hours from now were referring to swine virus. when the pondface is cut VISITOR: Yes, I see a widespread Music RevieYl He accompanies himself on the piano and does the solo vocals. and wet lisps out melange of wrappers, cups, papers, and by Mike Shinner to still the rattle other sundry garbage carrying mange, Paul is now on a nationwide tour. He of wind in leaves clap, arthritis, caries, and various inflam­ has been the most successful of the Paul McCartney's long-awaited album Beatles. mations. is finally out. It is entitled"Wings At The my face will appear RECEPTIONIST: Well, sir, they are . (If you get a chance to see him, go. It Speed Of Sound." This Ip is faster than to smile up at a whole sun our future ecologists. How else are they will probably be the last time you get "Venus and Mars" and sounds more like and winter will walk to learn? that chance. Hopefully though, this won't the old Paul McCartney. be his last album. from this pond edge VISITOR: The re must be a better way. Side one starts off with a door bell up twisted paths RECEPTIONIST: Well, sir, the ringing. This phases into "Let 'Em In." and a sleeping field situation can't be that bad. An orchestra cuts in and picks up the to our house. VISITOR: On my way in, I saw a tem~o. ~~ dreaded she-student wallowing in her own ,...... - .-.- - . if you're awake, dung... please don't let it in, RECEPTIONIST: She probably just even if you know dropped a course she was failing. That's its name and smell. merely the educational system, sir. if you're not there VISITOR: Well, I'm going back home. it will find you. My Harpies are hungry. Of course the above conversation is - David Citino fictious, but something like it could happen. Maybe not that drastic - but enough to make the public guestion what type of people we-have- here ~~Pu s . - Please: all you fellow students - when you go to deposit a waste article at the nearest place within your arm's reach, think about it a moment and put it in the proper place instead. ..Let's ask Sam here what determinant means. H e's the intellectual." 'rJf ", - , "' J'••••••••" ".·.·•••·'.·.·M LETTERS TO THE EDITOR There are some people that nothing improves except a slap in the face. Dear Annette R. Thompson: Hooray! for you r comment on abortion in the last issue. It is about time someone wrote in the WICK about one of the important issues facing us today.

Karen Risner

r...·.·.·rI'.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·•.•.. Personnel e COMI'LAINT • FORM PL EASE WRITE Y OUR COM PLA INT IN SP AC E B ELOW WRITE LEGIBLY . "YOU'VE GOT TO HAVE APPEAL o

, ,/ AS WELL A.S POWER IN YOUR The Wick The Marion Campus Wick is a bi-weekly newspaper, published with the VOICE. YOU'VE GOT TO CONVINCE help of both O.S.U.M. and M.T.C. The views expressed are unofficial. The advisors are Dave Citino (O.S.U.M.l and Ruth Wilson (M.T.C.l The Wick office is THE HOGS YOU'VE GOT SOMETHING located jn Room 211. Student Activities advisor is Harry McLaughlin. FOR THEM." Editor Annette Thompson News Editor Position Open Staff Writer Position Open Staff Writer (M.T.C.l Dave Kohler FRED GLANZ Staff Writer Position Open Staff Assistant John Dunbar WORLD'S CHAMPION Staff Assistant Position Open Music Critic Position Open HOG CALLER Sports Position Open Photographers Position Open Typing Position Open MAYDAY! TENTATIVE MAYDAY! SCHEDULE This year's Mayday will not be the FOR usual, run-of-the-mill Mayday. Although beer will be served as usual, there will be many more activities, than beer-guzzling. MAYDAY The On Friday there will be movies, card games, beer and an overnight sleepfest outside. On Saturday there will be tour­ Friday May 14 naments in many activities; ranging from volleyball to wristwrestling, active, and 8:00-12:00 p.m. Movies passive games and contests, entertain­ 12:00 - 8:00 p.m. Camp out Key ment, and a dance in the evening. Food will also be served on Saturday. Admission is free. Mayday provides an excellent oppor­ Saturday May 15 tunity for students and faculty alike to 8:00 a.m. Golf Match unwind. This is one of the best possible escapes from the drudgery of academ ia. 9:00 - 12:00 a.m. Car Show to If any students are interested in assisting the Senate with Mayday, or wish 10:00 a.m. Start Games - Softball to make suggestions, contact any member of the Senate or come to the Student 10:30 a.rn. Wrist-wrestling Senate meetings on Tuesdays at 3:00 in 11 :00 - 12:30 p.m . Chow Decision Room 247. CAMPUS SPORTS 12:30 p.m. volleyball 1:30 p.m. Tug-og-war (across lake)? NEWS 2:00 - 5:00 p.m . Sack races, egg toss, Making Thursday April 15 was the last night 3-legged races, boat races, boat rides, etc. for indoor sports at the Y.M.C.A. and the Armory for campus students. 5:00 - 7:30 "Free Time" bonfire, wiener • Our next phase of campus sports will roast, marshmallow roast be outdoors. These sports include softball, touch football, volleyball, and 7:30 - 11 :30 Disco dance (outdoors) IS.... portable tennis. If anyone is interested in getting If you have any suggestions for May outdoor sports going here on campus Day - you can contact any member of please contact Harry McLaughlin in the Student Senate or drop them off in Room 211 . .~.oom 160. ···~ (la' 2 ~';'--lNh·."''''.'_~A·.·-._·_·.·th' ·W'.·.'.·.·.·.·.v£'Jf'.... ·a·.·.·...-.-_-.·.--·...... Knowledge Sailing Club News Pianist to Appear, Here

There will be a get-together Saturday, Pianist Diana Duffin will appear in April 24 from 3 p.m. till "I" at Dan concert here on Thursday, April 29, at 3 Shifflets'. p.m. in Room 100. , The concert, KNOW YOUR CHOICES The sailboats are going to be cleaned sponsored by the Honors Opportunities and there will be a wiener roast Committee, will include the following:.La afterwards. MeImful.u.se by C. Daquin, Graun's G..i.Qu.e. SQna1a..JJLB.:£lat.. Op. Posth., D. 960 by . KNOW YOURSELF Everyone is asked to bring his or her .·.·.·.vJ', · ·.r ·_T_~.-.- ..", . own beer (or whateved, weiners and Schubert, Fiye preludes from Books 1 marsh allows. arnl2.by Debussy, the Hindesmith's.swte.. NEW CLUB Providing Dan's tractor is running, fQr. Klarier, 1922. UNSKILLED there will be a hayride. Diana Duffin received her early piano Anyone who is interested in sailing training in Philadelphia where she studied ON CAMPUS WORKERS vited to bring it and join in the fun - as with Eleanor Sokoloff and Susan Starr The LUMAR club (LET US MAKE and appeared with the Philadelphia there will be a jam session in the evening. ABORTION RETROACTIVE) an ad hoc WORK , The map below explains how to get Orchestra as a winner of the annual group has been born on this campus. Junior Student Competition. During her there. If, however, you get lost, call Dan The club's guiding philosophy is based H'E RE at 528- 7383. studies at the Juilliard School, where she on the beliefs of John Brown, who was earned a Bachelor of Science degree, she Anyone interested hanged for his pro-abortionist views. • was awarded a fellowship at Tanglewood or likes anything about sailing or likes A memorial lectu re is being planned 'i'.VV'.....:vv.9,JIJIa...... """...... ·.·.V.·.·.."" for two consecutive summers. As a grad­ anyone that is into sailing is invited. uate student and teaching associate at ,::.~~;;;..":.~YNN~.V. CONTEST OSU, Miss Duffin has appeared as a soloist with the OSU Symphony Orches­ tra and has received the Graduate Com­ A Questionairel ANNOUNCED mittee Award for Distinguished Teach- ing and Musicianship. Miss Duffin is a The Student Activities Council is The Wick is sponsoring the NAME student of Richard Tetley-Kardos and is getting ready to set up next year's HARRY'S BABY CONTEST. presently completing her doctorate. agenda...... ,....-••tf#f,...... ""...... ,.-.-.••••' ••••••, ... They would like to get an idea of what Mr. Harry McLaughlin and his wife are DAV NEWS the Student Body would like to see, or expecting their first child in May and are hear or do. To do that we print the in need of a name . Therefore we decided Chapter 22 of the Disabled Veterans questionaire below and would appreciate that we would help them and we have til!: will meet May 6 atB p.m. The mee~ing your cooperation in filling it out and come up with the brilliant idea of this contest. l . U+~ L II;; will be held at Cadet Hall, Manon. dropping it off in Room 211. All entries must be in by May 1 (since ~.'1 """S~ If you need transportation ~r infor- ot\ --'-5 the baby should be coming around then). mation you can call Dan Shifflet at Please mark the items below according le.+T '" Entries can be dropped off in Room 211. , ~ 528-7383. to preference. (# 1 - 6) .•....•.....••••••••••_...... •••••••••••••••••••r._- ••••••-MIx". ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••",••••••••••, •••••, To the winner will go an autographed Movies copy of Harry G. Crews' Art Collection. Second and third place winners will Dances receive an autographed copy of Francesco De Boya's "Edibles Raw". Fourth place Theatricals winner will receive an autorgaphed copy of the complete works of Philemon Lectures h.·.·.·.·NI.·.·.·.,Martin. ...·.,.,.,.,.,.,."",....."..;.·.·.·.· Sports "Blessed are they who never read a A./rr /01,. newspaper for they shall see Nature and Concerts through her, God." Henry David Thoreau.

Suggestions - The trouble in the world is nearly all due to the fact that one -half of the people are men, and the other half are women.

"No American newspaper will print anything contrary to its own interests" -George Bernard Shaw "School dropout, /10 doubt." PROBLEMS NOSTALGIA Joke of the Week Mystery 1. What was the name of the first by Jovial Harry OF EDUCATION women's college to play basket­ of the Week ball? In what year? A grammatical study by S. Roger Tacky, A Kentuckian worked at a local Prof. Eng. grammar at Milwaukee State factory. After several years of saving his 2. In what year was basketball (See if you can match wits with Inspector money, he grew lonesome and wished to invented? Novatny). What always gets me is how nobody return home. Entering the bus station, he can write sentences no more. Even college asked the price os a ticket. 3. What singing group vocalized the Police Chief Samuels called Inspector kids. I and alot of my friends has discuss­ "$9.30," said the agent. Glenn Miller Band to record Chat­ Novatny to the scene of the murder. He ed the widespread problem and have The Kentuckian pulled out his savings, anooga Choo Choo?" knew he would need Novatny's brilliant come up with a few possible solutions. which totaled $9.25. mind. The Inspector did not like what he Seems to me alot of students forget , "Will that do?" he asked. 4. Who wrote the play "Mu rder in the saw. The nude body of Andrea Ames, verbs. Since verbs denotes action, the "No," said the agent, "But I'll tell you Cathedral?" wealthy and beautiful young socialite, teacher should make those people get up what. Just go outside and ask someone was hanging from a maple tree, a crude and run around the room or something so for a nickel. It's no real bother, and he 5. Who invented basketball? From hemp rope around her neck. There were is that they won't forget to put action in won't mind." what college did he graduate? several bullet wounds in her legs, and nine their sentence. If this don't work then the The first person the Kentuckian inch dagger was lodged in her throat. teacher should punch them in the mouth encountered was a learned man. 6. How old was Fred Astaire when he "You say the body hasn't spoken since real hard so as the student will get so "Say, Bud," the Kentuckian began. debuted professionally as a dancer? you arrived?" asked the Inspector. much action and he will never forget to "I'm going back to Kentucky and I need "That's right". said Chief Samuels, put it in his sentence again. . a nickel." 7. Who wrote the T.V. title song "77 sipping his coffee while he munched on a Tenses is again a wholly different The learned man reached into his Sunset Strip?" hydrox. "But I did gather three suspects, problem of which almost everybody has pocket and pulled out a quarter. who were acting strangely, in the vicinity. problems with and I didn't lick the "Here, take four more with you." 8. Who founded the New York They had her furs and jewels in their problem myself until I reread a~d ~eread Tribune? possession. They apparently assaulted, again the dialogue of Krasotkm ~n the y.y··....A'RTAWARir·...... robbed, and murdered Miss Ames. Brothers Karamanzo in the translation by 9. Who won the 1969 Nobel Peace They're in the car." David Magarshack Abednego. Only then Prize in Literature? Inspector Novatny walked to the car do I now know how to handle tenses. If TO BE GIVEN and looked in. There he saw Arlo "Mad we want to draw a parallel we can go to 10. At what college was Henry Kis­ The Harry C. Crews Memorial will be Dog" Brunson. Nathan "Punko" Delps, tenses as pertaining to muscles. A student singer formerly a professor? awarded to this year's winner of the art and James Earle Ray. having problems with tenses should be and food preparation contest. He stood upright. made by the teacher to do isometrics. 11. Who wrote the song "Gentlemen Technique and artistic excellence in "Arrest these men. They're the ones," This usually cures the problem. However, Prefer Blondes?" food preparation is the basis for the he told the Chief. we have by experience that isometrics judging. works only on the pluperfect tense. For 12. What was the date of dedication of Last year's winner, Francesco De the rest of the tenses, it is still a problem the National Baseball Hall of Fame Boya 's "Edibles Raw" is on display in How did the Inspector know? and some of us are still hunting up the and Museum? Where is it located? Room 211. Answer: He didn't ~ he was solution. See next issue for the winnir .. dru nk at the time and not accou ntable Lastly and finally there are those IIV' ,.•••••••••••••••••• •••••~ ., • 13. What poet wrote "Tulips and for his statements. Actually, the three students who don't know the English Chimneys?" Was there ever a lecturer who did not men explained themselves to the full language well enough and can only speak come well recommended? satisfaction of the jury. They encounter­ very slowly. The solution for this is that 14. Who originally translated Aesop's ed the socialite in a lonely neck of the the student should be made to ride on a ·...·.·JI.·.·...·.....·.·.·.·.·.-.V.·...·...·•·•·.·...'...·...,. fables into verse? woods. She was gasping for air, so they roller coaster or car or something other loosened her clothing to enable her to that goes pretty fast and speak in a tape 15. What was the profession of the breathe. When this failed, they performed recorder. Now it happens that the student Marx Brothers' father? a tracheotomy with the knife. They said should take only the microphone in the WHY? that her legs appeared gangrened and they roller coaster or car with him and leave attemped amputation with bullets. The answers to the Trivia Quiz can. be the tape recorder somewhere standing Fearing bleeding, they applied a found in the Student Activities Office, still. Now that he is riding 30 mph's or so tourniquet with the rope. The fur and his words will be recorded all that much jewels were given to them by Miss Ames faster on the tape recorder, which has ULOM~:~N~"'~~~~~~N:~~IY""~~~~~~~~~~~""~~~~~"111~~2..~----..rtt:>-opayment for heir. services. ;rh thre_e been standing still, he will sound as were acquitted and will begin employ­ though he's talking normal. For this pur­ ment as nurses next Monday. pose I have built a roller coaster and ...•." , v..•.•W' .. Bump-Em cars on the school yard & the students enjoy the cou rse very much. Why does man kill? Man kills for food, However, I am not too worried about this but not just for food, frequently, there problem of talking too slowly as with the must be a beverage. progress of science, everybody will be riding around in rockets and the problem Woody Allen "····I[SM···---will be virtually extincted. I observe Marion and "know there is a I have no respect for a man who can spell heaven, for here I see Hell. a word only one way. Arkansas Humming Bird Mark Twain

Definition of the Week There is major solace in this sad life, and that is the soothing effect on one's "Quixotic" - Absurdly chivalric, from depression when he views the boring, Don Quixote obscure mediocrity of the silent majority. The excellence and beauty of this incomparable adjective is lost on him who The Arkansas Humming Bird has the misfortune to know it is pro­ _.-_re-nounced Ke-Ho-Tay.

'"F'--""-~::_~-I::::" __ ,,_, __ Ambrose Bierce .t:'tIItT -w VW. ·PEN PAL LIST Pity the obedient of any society. Do not give honors, awards or such Larry McGhee 141-213 To the sheep who follow the lead P.O. Box 57 Who'll follow to hell and back Just like that. Marion, Ohio 43302 Shun those fools, these automatons P.Curtis Adams 139005 As they grind and rumble onward P.O. Box 57 Move from their rutted pathway, Marion, Ohio 43302 For the masses of human sticks Are naught but soineless shells. Leonard K. Braxton 139623 Do not bow a President or worse A trumped up autocrat. No! _ P.O. Box 57 Worship not God in the churches Marion, Ohio 43302 Or Satan in the flesh To follow is to follow no matter where it Ben Panky 136527 leads P.O. Box 57 And if the goal is known, still worse Marion, Ohio 43302 A curse this is. Robert Holladay 143-637 P.O. Box 57 by Miles Marion, Ohio 43302 ...... - ... William Hardwick 136233 P.O. Box 57 Marion, Ohio 43302 LIFE