GLCCB Renamed 'Pride Center Of

May 10, 2019 | Volume XVII, Issue 1

now, formerly in the Waxter Center, and The planned wrap-around services in- GLCCB Renamed ‘Pride Center of now at 2530 North Charles Street, its cur- clude case management, housing naviga- rent location. tion, linkage to health care, employment MD’ – Plans Building Purchase The plans for the new building envision assistance, professional development a mixed-use space including two floors that programs, assistance obtaining insurance, by Bill Redmond-Palmer ry building in the Charles North and Old house wrap-around community services. as well as access to education programs, At the cusp of major changes, the Gay, Goucher neighborhoods. The first floor will include retail space, as legal aid, and other services to ensure the Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Com- Following the passage of the bond bill, well as common ar- community’s good health and welfare. munity Center of Baltimore and center Executive Direc- Other programs will include family Central Maryland – widely known Center aims tor Mimi Demissew stat- services, addiction related services, for decades as the GLCCB – is ed that “having an actual after-school programs for youth, as changing its name to Pride Cen- to occupy space that belongs to the well as a variety of evening programs ter of Maryland and has taken new home Pride Center of Maryland for older adults. the first step toward purchasing is imperative to ensuring In addition, an anonymous bene- a building which will serve as its next year Maryland’s sexual and factor and business partners with the new home. gender minority will always center have donated initial capital in- With the support of State Senator Mary have a space to call our own.” vestments toward the project. Washington and State Delegate Maggie Since the sale of the building pre- Additional funds will be raised through Macintosh, the center secured at $500,000 viously owned by the organization eas open for use by the community. The other fund-raising initiatives. The new bond from the Maryland General Assem- located on Chase Street, the center has other floors will house one-bedroom effi- space is projected to open in the summer bly which will allow for the purchase been renting space ciency apartments as well as office space of 2020. t of a five-sto- for several years for business owners to rent.

By Frankie Kujawa around the globe perform with six young The Next Ice Age recent- male skaters in a program in which they ly celebrated over 30 will skate to Aaron Copland’s “Hoe-Down,” years of excellence as from the larger work Rodeo. Baltimore one of only three dance OUTloud recently chatted with program di- companies on ice in rector Nathan Birch. America. On Thurs- A great show “This program will fea- day, May 16th, the ture professional skaters Mount Pleasant on May mentoring the Ice Men, Ice Arena will host 16th – and who are an amateur young MEN ON the Next Ice Age, men’s skating group. These which will join with mentoring six young kids get to work the Ice Men, a with the best profession- group of amateur the next als from around the world. young male skat- generation We’re offering this to these ers, in the revival six young men as a way to of choreographer of men’s get this program out there John Curry’s ad- and elevate it.” Birch contin- aptation for skat- skaters ued, “What the Ice Men will ers of Aaron Co- be skating to is a one-min- plained Birch.ICE “They’ll see skater Jordan pland’s score for the ute version called ‘Hoe-Down.’” Cowan filming it.” Cowan is a former Team ballet Rodeo. During “The special thing is that this program USA Ice Dancer and ballroom dancer spe- this performance, is being professionally videotaped by a cializing in videography on and off the ice. A bevy of Ice Men – ten of the best male company called On Ice Perspectives, and “[Cowan] gets out on the ice and skates performing figure skaters from that’s what the audience will see,” ex- —continued on page 18 May 16th Co-Publishers Jim Becker • Jim Williams [email protected]

Executive Editor Jim Becker [email protected] [email protected]

Associate Editor & Director of Marketing & Production Mary Taylor [email protected]

Arts and Entertainment Editor Frankie Kujawa [email protected]

Leather Editor Rodney Burger [email protected]

Contributing Writers for Baltimore OUTloud Andre Shakti • Bill Redmond-Palmer Brynn Devereau • Charles Dudley, MPT Chuck Duncan • David Egan David Placher • Dr. Eva Hersh MD Elyse Buchbinder • Frankie Kujawa Gregg Shapiro • Jabari Lyles Janan Broadbent, Ph. D. • Jeffrey Clagett Josh Buchbinder • Lauren Lynch • Lee Carpenter Linda A. Dominguez, Esq. • Mark S. King Mark Segal • Michael Ritmiller Rabbi Jan Dodi • Richard Finger • Rodney Burger Sage Piper • Steve Charing • Woody Derrick

Contributing Writers for OUT in the VALLEY Asher Kennedy • Brian George Hose Rev. Kelly Crenshaw • Rev. Robert Apgar-Taylor Zed Sykes

Graphics Ramon Montiel

Web Editor Adam Romanik Computer Solutions for Less

Photographers Corey Brent Eric Randolph

National Advertising Rep Rivendell Media 908-232-2021

Founders Jim Becker • Joe Berg • Mike Chase Lee Mooney (1959-2007) • Jim Williams

Baltimore OUTloud PO Box 4887 Baltimore, MD 21211 410-802-1310 Baltimoreoutloud.com

Additional Information Baltimore OUTloud is published every other Friday by Pride Media, Ltd. in Baltimore, Maryland. Readers comments and unsolicited materials are welcomed and may be sent to: [email protected]. All materials appearing in this newspaper are the property of Pride Media, Ltd. and may not be reproduced without the written permission of the editor.

The opinions expressed in Baltimore OUTloud are solely those of the writers unless otherwise indicated and do not necessarily reflect the views of Pride Media, Ltd., and the staff.

2 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com news // local Getting to Know LaKesha Davis, Pride Coordinator By Richard Finger I like to work behind LaKesha Davis, a native the scenes. I have to Baltimorian, is a student expose myself to many Upcoming 2020 Baltimore Pride at the University of Mary- criticisms to be in this land Eastern Shore pursu- position. I have accepted Fundraising events ing a PhD in organization- that challenge because I Details can be found on the Pride Center of Baltimore Facebook page and web- al leadership. She holds a would like to see a more site (Pridecentermd.org): master’s degree in human cohesive community. • DDL Lounge – Saturday, May 18th services administration and While I know that I will • Pride Paint & Sip R House – Sunday, May 19th associate’s and bachelor’s not be able to please • LGBT Pride Night at Camden Yards – Wednesday, June 12th degrees in criminal justice. everyone, I would like • Bar Vasquez – Thursday, June 13th In addition to being a life- to know that I did the • Twilight on the Terrace – Friday, June 14th long learner, LaKesha is a best that I could to be full-time mother, employee, a part of the solution. and part-time radio person- I would also like to in- ality and entrepreneur. She crease the outreach In addition to the following events, ly spaces to partner on LGBT events. The gives back to her community efforts. We have to find we are planning a bowling party, a Spirit funds from these events will allow us to by serving underprivileged a way to reach people Cruise, the Ultimate Pride2k Experience, make Pride bigger and better! I believe the youth, providing training and outside of social me- and a Winter Gala. I feel that our com- goal is attainable and will have lots of fun mentorship. Checkout her dia. Although we are munity and Pride should be celebrated all in attempts to achieve it. Keep an eye out many ventures by going to living in the land of year long. I know the goal seems crazy for the flyers and social media postings. her website Wonanddonepro- technology, I feel like and far-fetched, however, to accomplish it, We have to increase the attendance in or- grams.org. we are missing a large I am being introduced to and reaching out der for the fundraisers to be successful. I Richard Finger: How group of people. I am to managers and owners of queer-friend- am always open for suggestions. t long have you been the looking into a mar- Pride coordinator? keting strategy to in- LaKesha Davis: This is crease the reach. my second year as the coor- What are some dinator. In 2017, I was chair of of the lessons the Entertainment Committee. learned from last I was able to secure all of the LaKesha Davis, year’s Pride? entertainment within 60 days. That Baltimore Pride The biggest lesson for me year, I was able to secure Big Free- coordinator is to worry about those things dia and Jessica Sutta. It was super that are in my control. I put a NEW EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITY! exciting. It was the first time that I suggestion box on the Balti- had ever participated in a large-scale more Pride website. People New outdoor resort opening this summer located north of event such as Pride. In fact, before that thought I was crazy and a glutton for pun- Romney, Hampshire Co. West Virginia. time, I’d never patronized the Pride festi- ishment. It is important for me to know the We need the following positions filled within the next four val. I selected the GLCCB as an internship concerns of the community so that we can for my master’s program, because I want- strategize on finding the best path. I may to six weeks. Many of these positions will be year round! ed to get more involved in the community. not be able to grant every wish or fix every I have been here ever since. I thank Mimi, problem. Hopefully I can make people feel Restaurant: Bakers, Bartenders, Bar-backs, Bus & cleaning staff, the executive director for having faith in that their voices have been heard. We’ve Dish/Pot washers, Food prep & Line cooks, my abilities and giving me this opportunity. taken measures to improve communica- How are things progressing with tion and security making Pride a safe, fun, Floor managers, Host & Wait staff. Pride this year? and memorable experience for all patrons. Outside Help: Activities attendant, Groundskeepers, Things are coming into place. We are What excites you most about 2019 Horse tenders, Facility maintenance staff. a lot further along in the process than we Baltimore Pride? were this time last year. I feel we can get Unfortunately, I don’t get to partake in better each year. So we learn from the all of the fun that happens at Pride. I have Please complete the job application at the following link things we didn’t do well and strive to do the goal of coordinating a safe and suc- and we will get back to you! things better the next year. I love the team cessful event. However, on the Monday https://rainbowcountryresorts.com/job-application of volunteers. Without them none of this morning following, I get to digest it all and would be possible. They give selflessly to relish in the compliments and photos of a Come grow with us!!! the cause and I couldn’t ask for more. We success festival. have made vital connections in the com- The Pride Center is on a quest to munity, forging new relationships in an at- raise $100,000 for 2020 Pride. What are tempt to find balance and unification in the some of the events that are planned, community. and what are some other ideas the Cen- What are some of the challenges? ter has in mind?

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 3

Select Chase Brexton Health Care patients deemed most in need may be eligible for digital breast cancer screenings through a mobile mammography van to be located at the Chase Brexton Mount Vernon Center on September 28th. The screenings are provided in partnership with Lackawan- na Mobile X-Ray and the Susan G. Komen Foundation. Breast cancer is the second most common cancer in women, and mammograms are capable of finding it up to three years before it can be felt. The Center for Disease Control recommends mammograms every two years for women age 50 and older who are at average risk for breast cancer. The staff of Chase Brexton encour- ages their patients to remember that early detection saves lives! Any patient who feels they may quality should contact their Chase Brexton provider or call 410-837- 2050 for more info. t news // local

First Annual LGBT to Johanna M. Dolan, founder Dolan Re- of their own; they parent each other, love search International Mother’s Day each other, and choose each other to rely Community Leader of the Year was on. On Sunday, May 12th, from 4 to 5:30 Champions Awards awarded to Franklin N. McNeil, Jr., a vice Drag Brunch pm, Dreams and Visions invites you to president at PNC Bank. take part as it explore the topic of “Chosen Dinner Member of the Year was handed to Lee Thinking hard about how to make mom’s Family” – “leaving family, seeking family, Johnson-Lowe, director of sales, at Lord special day special? Look no further! Of and the family that God creates.” By Joan Cox Baltimore Hotel. Love & Regret invites you to their Mother’s The group will explore what makes a The Maryland LGBT Chamber of Com- The evening’s entertainment came Day Drag Brunch, which they promise will family and consider the damage families merce held its first annual “LGBT+ Cham- from the New Wave Singers of Baltimore, be sensational! This one-of-a-kind show can do, as well as the love families can pions Awards” dinner on Thursday, April led by Timothy Gilliam, also a chamber will be hosted by the living legend, Abbi give. “Whatever your background,” orga- 25th at the Lord Baltimore Hotel. Over member. The New Wave Singers’ rendition Kadabra, will star Kristina Kelly, and will nizers say, “if you experience family as 150 LGBT professionals and allies came of M People’s “Proud” resonated perfectly. feature Kit Valentine, Brie DeVine, Kedra complicated, difficult, or damaging, you together to recognize and honor seven The celebratory evening closed out Lattimore, and Saaphyri Wildz. are invited to join the conversation.” outstanding people who have made signif- with cocktails and dessert in the gorgeous Join in the fun on Sunday, May 12th at Dreams and Visions describes itself as icant contributions to the LGBT communi- historic lobby of the Lord Baltimore Hotel. Of Love & Regret (1028 South Conkling a “spiritual community in Baltimore root- ty. The evening was opened by Chamber As the Chamber launches into its third Street, Baltimore). Doors open for seating ed in the faith and experiences of LGBTQ co-founders Betsy Cerulo and Dave Imre, year during Pride month, it is expanding at 11 am and the show starts promptly at people, who work to create an imaginative and was followed by inspiring remarks across Maryland, hiring a part-time execu- noon. You are encouraged to get there ear- space of restoration, where those present from the president and co-founder of the tive director, and expanding their board. The ly to get your food and drinks before the can find the courage to be their full selves. National LGBT Chamber of Commerce newly elected slate of board members tran- show begins. We affirm that everyone, including LGBTQ (NGLCC) Justin Nelson and Maryland’s sitions President Joan Cox into the immedi- Tickets are $40 per person and include folk, is made in the image of God.” first openly lesbian state senator, Mary ate past president advisory role on the board reserved seating and gourmet fare. Add The group gathers each second Sun- Washington. while Tom Koerber moves into position as their bottomless drink special including day of the month at 3400 Norman Avenue, president, Terri Hett as vice president, April mimosas, draft beers, rose drafts, sangria, in Baltimore. Look for the big red doors, Rancier as secretary, and Keith Snyder as and rail mules for just $22. The venue fea- and the sandwich board pointing the way. treasurer. Board members-at-large include: tures a craft cocktail bar, and they make The entrance is close to Lake Avenue. Ricky Adams, Wil Graham, Winnie Hull, and infuse most of their spirits in house. There is plenty of street parking in the Gavriel Legynd, Nancy McDonald, Darlene Tickets are available at Bit.ly/2V61D4s. area, and the 22 and 54 buses will bring Niccoli, and Carlton Smith. Look for the Please note that there will be no refunds you within a short walk of the gathering Maryland LGBT Chamber of Commerce given for online ticket purchases. space. There is a parking space and en- booth at many of the Prides around Mary- The featured special Mother’s Day trance for anyone with limited mobility or land this June and check their website of up- Brunch menu will include your choice who cannot navigate stairs. coming events at Mdlgbt.org. t of crab cakes; lobster mac-and-cheese, Kids’ participation and presence is prime rib, assorted pastries, fruit salad, desired and will have plenty of opportuni- scrambled eggs, crispy bacon, decadent ties for engagement. Chairs are available deviled eggs, veggie frittata, and caprese for the service. Participants are invited to Wanted: Trans salad. wear a name tag with their name and pre- Please note that they do not have an ferred pronouns. Artists ATM on premises, so be sure to bring For more info, the Facebook event The young LGBT chamber, just wrap- cash to tip the queens. Please note that page is at Bit.ly/2V2FQuw, or email emi- ping up its second year of programming, t The Baltimore City Office of LGBTQ Affairs this event is rated PG-13 and involves the [email protected]. has grown to over 150 members and invites Baltimore area transgender artists sale and consumption of alcohol. Anyone held over 45 networking and educational of all ages and experiences to submit art- under the age of 18 will need to be accom- events in the past two years. in 2018 the work to be featured in a Pride Month art panied by a chaperone. For more informa- Maryland LGBT Chamber was recognized show. Artists may submit 1 to 3 pieces tion visit their Facebook event page at Bit. by the NGLCC as its “Rising Star Chamber t which may be sold and 100% of the pro- ly/2IP5z38. FreeState Justice’s of the Year.” The all-volunteer organization ceeds will be returned to the artist. The has built a strong foundation as an influen- submission deadline is May 22nd. tial change-maker and supporter of LGBT Annual Jazz Brunch, Interested artists should contact Ja- businesses across Maryland with focuses bari Lyles at [email protected] Queer Spirituality: on fair competition in business, workplace May 11th with their contact information. They should protection, networking, and collaboration. include in the email the following informa- Corporate Leader of the Year award Dreams & Visions tion about each piece to be submitted: title; went to Neil M. Meltzer, CEO of LifeBridge Following the successful revival of the dimensions; medium; date created; price; Health. Dicusses ‘Families event in 2018, FreeState Justice invites and a digital image of the piece. t Corporate Partner of the Year was everyone to this year’s Jazz Brunch on Stacie M. Rinker, a vice president of M&T of Choice’ May 11th, from 11 am to 2 pm at the Hav- Bank en Street Ballroom (1 North Haven Street, Ally Partners of the Year were Eliza- Baltimore). The group has partnered with beth Della Massing and Allison Benson For many in the queer community, being Haven Street Ballroom, a brand-new ven- O’Brien of 14 West loved and accepted isn’t a given. This ue, along with talented musicians, chefs, Emerging Leader of the Year went baltimoreoutloud.com compels queer kindred to create families and other local talent to create a memora-

4 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com news // local

Out Networking at McCormick

The Maryland LGBT Chamber of Com- merce invites you to join the group’s monthly “Out Networking” event from 5 to Add you business to our distribution locAtions! 7 pm on Thursday, May 16th at the new headquarters of their member company McCormick (24 Schilling Road, suite 1, in Call Baltimore OUTloud Hunt Valley). You’ll have an opportunity to mix and mingle with members of McCor- for more details: mick’s LGBT affinity group Prism, while 410-802-1310 sampling delicious McCormick recipes. Please note that no alcohol will be provided at this event, but plenty of new concoctions and ble event. tasty treats will Haven Street Ballroom is an accessi- be served up. ble venue with free parking. Tickets are The event is free $125. You can also choose your own VIP to LGBT Cham- “lounge,” for you and seven guests with ta- ber and McCor- ble service, for $1500. If you aren’t able to mick Prism mem- join in this year, but still want to support bers and $15 for non-members. Tickets are the event and the work of FreeState Jus- available at Bit.ly/2Dza8dN. All attendees tice, then see how you can contribute at must register before 1 pm on the day of Bit.ly/2vBRvSd. the event and show photo ID to enter the For more info visit the Facebook event McCormick headquarters. For more infor- page at Bit.ly/2IO3Nzh. t mation, visit their Facebook event page at Bit.ly/2GJO15e.

Pre-Prom Gay- LGBTQ Teacher Straight Alliance Happy Hour Mixer, May 17th

If you’re gearing up for this year’s LGBTQ Following the successful premiere of this Prom, take a chance to make new friends event in December, GLSEN Maryland (Gay at the Pre-Prom GSA Mixer on Friday, May and Lesbian Students and Educators Net- 17th, from 4:30 to 7:30 pm, at Paul Lau- work) and the Baltimore City LGBTQ Com- rence Dunbar High School (1400 Orleans mission are teaming up to create a space Street, Baltimore). This event is for current for LGBTQ teachers to have a little recess high school students only. School ID is re- after work. Join them for this first-of-its- quired for entry. kind event “Mx: An LGBTQ Teacher Happy This event is hosted by the Dunbar Hour” on May 10th, from 5 to 7 pm at Chez GSA and supported by Baltimore mayor’s Hugo Bistro (206 East Redwood Street, office, the Baltimore City LGBTQ Com- Baltimore). More info at Bit.ly/2vsq0Kv. mission, GLSEN Maryland, and the Len Oh, and in case you were wondering, “Mx” Jackson fund at the Baltimore Community is now a thing. Learn more at En.oxforddic- t Foundation. tionaries.com/definition/mx. Register at Bit.ly/2XTP21h. For tickets or more information about the mixer, visit the Facebook event page at Bit.ly/2IN- prE1, or email jabari.lyles@baltimorecity. gov. t

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 5 beyond the beltway

compiled by Jim Becker Disease Control, at the end of 2016, 1.1 thought you were gay, Tugay!’ she said .… million people aged 13 and older had HIV Since then, my mum, aunt, and sister have infection in the US, including an estimated been fully supportive .... If I hadn’t found a Is the end of HIV 162,500 people – 14% – whose infections place where I could truly be myself, I truly had not been diagnosed. Globally, there fear what I might have become.” (BBC – transmission in were approximately 36.9 million people Rahil Sheikh at bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/ worldwide living with HIV/AIDS in 2017, cc70b8a4-f14f-4324-a81a-82fe347f9664) sight? according to HIV.gov. Of those nearly 37 million people, and only about 75% were London – A study of gay couples pub- aware of their HIV-positive status. (Dallas lished on May 2nd in the medical journal Voice at Dallasvoice.com/the-end-of-aids- Tugay at Berlin Pride with Seyran Ates Kuwait prof: Lancet indicates that HIV-positive men study-suggests-drugs-fully-suppressing- founder of gay frendly mosque in whom the infection is fully suppressed hiv-can-stop-transmission) Killing anal by anti-retroviral drugs have no chance mons …. They talked about things like how of passing the virus to their partner, even there shouldn’t be equality between men worms cures through sex without a condom. The UK and women, and that anyone who believed Guardian reported on the findings with the ‘My gay- in a different god should be killed …. They homosexuality headline declaring “End to AIDS in sight,” were so charismatic … I could feel my- and noting, “The success of the medicine friendly mosque self being sucked in …. By the time I was Kuwait City – A Kuwaiti academic has means that if everyone with HIV were about 15, I started feeling like I wanted to claimed that she has developed a cure saved me from be around other people who shared the for homosexuality that targets semen-eat- views I saw onscreen .... I started hanging anal worms. Dr Mariam Al-Sohel, who becoming a ing out with them in a local Turkish cafe .... claims to have qualifications in “Sex Man- We were hearing more and more about the agement,” appeared on Kuwaiti channel radical’ rise of the so-called Islamic State and we’d Scope TV to sell suppositories that she talk about joining them .... I was naive – I claims kills worms making men gay. Berlin – Now 21-year-old openly gay mistakenly saw IS as a force for good .... I In a clip translated by the Middle East Muslim Tugay Sarac tells his story of near was obsessed with being a ‘good Muslim’ Media Research Institute Sohel claims radicalization and finally acceptance to and following the teachings of the online that she has “discovered therapeutic sup- Rahil Sheikh and published by the BBC. preachers so that I wouldn’t go to hell for positories that curb the sexual urges” of What follows is an abridged version of his being gay. Two more years passed, and gay men and lesbians. Sohel explains: story in his own words: I still knew deep down I was gay .... [A “The sexual urge develops when a person fully treated, there would be no further “Sitting in my bedroom alone, a wave of non-radical friend told me IS was killing is sexually attacked, and afterwards it per- infections.” Earlier studies, the report not- fear washed over me. I was 12 years old, innocent people and] sent me a video that sists, because there is an anal worm that ed, have shown that the drugs also stop confused, and scared – I was beginning changed everything – it was a beheading feeds on semen .... It feeds on sperm. So, transmission in straight couples where to realize I was gay. My dad was watch- of a civilian. I felt sick – how could I have what I did was to produce suppositories one partner is HIV-positive and the other ing TV in the living room, and all I could got this so wrong? which are to be used by certain people at is negative. think about was how disappointed he’d be “It was a line from a Youtube news show, a certain time, and it cures those urges According to the paper in the Lancet, if he ever found out. I grew up in a Turk- ‘The Young Turks,’ that changed my path. by exterminating the worm that feeds on 972 sero-discordant gay couples were en- ish neighborhood in Berlin. My family are ‘Why would you believe in a religion or a rolled in the study from September 2010 conservative Muslims and my dad was al- God if this God hates you, if this God will to July 2017, and the HIV-positive partner ways pretty strict. But we were still close throw you to hell and let you burn forever?’ was receiving treatment to suppress the …. [But] [h]e was the one who first made the presenter asked. That question got me virus, there were no cases in which the me feel like being gay wasn’t acceptable. thinking. I hadn’t chosen to be gay, so why HIV-negative partner was infected through He didn’t outright tell me I couldn’t be gay would God punish me for it .... If I couldn’t condomless sex with his partner. There – it was more like he had just never consid- be gay and Muslim, I wondered, should I were 15 men who contracted HIV during ered it as a possibility for his child. be Muslim at all? .… Then I heard about the study, but DNA testing proved they “My dad’s attitude wasn’t the only thing a new, liberal mosque in Berlin called Ibn were infected through sex with someone that made me feel like I needed to hide Rushd-Goethe, that was right on my door- other than their partner. my sexuality. I was also frightened of step. It has a female imam, lets Muslims Co-author Alison Rodger of Univer- what people in my community would say. of all genders pray together, and accepts Wormcatcher – Dr Mariam Al-Sohel sity College, London, called the results I had overheard people saying bad things gay, lesbian, and transgender Muslims. It’s “brilliant, fantastic,” telling The Guardian about gay people on TV …. I didn’t want caused controversy in the Muslim world, sperm.” The academic, adds: “By the way, that the study “very much puts this issue people to think I wasn’t a real man, or a receiving condemnation from Turkish or- this is all science, so there’s nothing to be to bed. … Our findings provide conclu- real Muslim. Then when I was 13, I lost my ganizations and even a fatwa from Egypt ashamed of. Of course not. It’s Prophet- sive evidence for gay men that the risk of dad to stomach cancer. The grief hit me but for me, it was a light in the darkness. ic medicine. It’s all in the books.” Sohel HIV transmission with suppressive [an- hard. Religion became my way of coping When a gay imam from Marseille, France, goes on to claim that the treatment works tiretroviral therapy] is zero. Our findings ….. I thought that if I devoted myself to my visited the mosque and delivered a semi- for both gay men and lesbians, though it support the message of the international faith, I could forget about my sexuality …. nar, my mind was blown – I began to real- is unclear how exactly semen-eating anal U=U campaign that an undetectable viral That how I started to follow a more radical ize that being gay and Muslim at the same worms would survive in most lesbian rela- load makes HIV untransmittable.” Rodger form of Islam. I’d secretly search online time is natural and normal .... I saw a way tionships. She adds that the treatments for added, “This powerful message can help for blogs and videos about radical Islam to reconcile my religion with my sexual- gay men also include a balanced diet of end the HIV pandemic by preventing HIV .... My searches led me to Youtube videos ity .... [and tell my family] I was terrified, foods “that increase their masculinity and transmission.” According to the Centers for of ‘online preachers’ giving hate-filled ser- until my aunt broke the silence. ‘I always build muscle.” Sohel claimed: “Any food

6 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com beyond the beltway

that is buried underground provides men ple with the least re- the jury system. It also defines and includes vocal advocates for LGBT rights. “Travel at with stability, strengthens their muscles sources will be most sex, sexual orientation, and gender identity its best enriches us with new connections and increases their masculinity.” harmed by these among the prohibited categories of discrim- and a deeper understanding of the world in This semen-eating anal worms theo- rules if such a broad ination or segregation. “The ability to have which we live,” said Craig Smith, president ry received a frosty reception from many. range of providers a job, to receive medical care, or to rent a of Source Events. “Given the high profile of Gay German politician Volker Beck told and other entities home should not depend on who someone Prince Manvendra, (including an appear- the Jerusalem Post: “The cure for homo- are allowed to deny is or where they live. And it certainly should ance on “Oprah” in 2007), and his commit- sexuality is popular among religious funda- access to compre- not depend on who they love,” committee ment to improving the lives of LGBTQ people mentalists. It is quackery and charlatanry. Susan Fogel hensive quality care chairman Jerrold Nadler (D-NY) said May in India, a get-together with the prince was a “Such therapies and their apologists must based on their personal religious beliefs.” 1st. The bill, introduced by Rep. David Cicil- natural fit,” Source Events staff shared. be warned. Whether it is Sohel’s suppos- “Since his first days in office, Donald line (D-RI), has more than 230 Democratic At a reception, the 21 members of the itories or from Catholic doctors in Germa- Trump has used executive powers to un- co-sponsors, including all the Democratic tour were able to interact in an informal set- ny, it is hocus pocus that reveals much dermine access to health care in this coun- House members from Washington state. ting with the prince, who was joined by his about the mental state of these people.” try, particularly for those who are struggling The Business Coalition for the Equality husband Duke DeAndre Richardson. During British campaigner Peter Tatchell added: to make ends meet and for those who are Act, which is made up of about 200 compa- that time, they learned about the challenges “This takes gay ‘conversion therapy’ and the most marginalized in our health care nies, teamed up with the HRC to push the faced by India’s LGBT population, as well as quack medicine to new heights of absur- system,” says NHLP attorney Candace bill through Congress. On the other side, the the work of the Lakshya Trust, the founda- dity .... [It] shows how dogmatic religion Gibson. Williams Institute’s Jocelyn Samu- Heritage Foundation claims that the Equal- tion established by the prince to advocate for, is the enemy of knowledge, truth and els, the former director of the Office of Civil ity Act would force employers and workers and improve the lives of, the marginalized human rights.” (Pink News at Pinknews. Rights, said, “In the Obama administration, to conform to new sexual norms and force communities of LGBT people and those in- co.uk/2019/04/24/kuwaiti-academic-se- we were focused on expanding access to hospitals and insurers to provide and pay fected with HIV in India. “Meeting with Prince men-eating-anal-worms-homosexuality) health care through the implementation of for therapy against any moral or medical ob- Manvendra and his husband, and learning the Affordable Care Act [ACA] and the full jections. They also said it would harm fam- firsthand about their monumental work was and balanced enforcement of anti-discrim- ilies by normalizing hormonal and surgical inspiring,” said Liebe Gadinsky, co-chair of ination and provider-conscience laws. By interventions for gender-dysphoric children, Trump issues contrast, this administration is simultane- lead to the erasure of women by dismantling ously trying to restrict universal access to sex-specific facilities and sports, and affect new rule care through attacks on the ACA and ex- faith-based charities. Rep. Doug Collins pand the authorization for denials of care (R-GA), the committee’s ranking member, allowing bias by religious providers. These actions stand said the bill “marginalizes almost an end- to undermine the health and well-being of less spectrum of Americans” – presumably in health care vulnerable communities, including LGBT meaning right-wing Christians – and is “leg- people.” (Seattle Gay News, the Williams islation based in political theory, not scientif- system Institute at UCLA School of Law, and the ic reality.” (Seattle Gay News – Mike Andrew Royal reception National Health Law Program at Sgn.org/ at Sgn.org/sgnnews47_18/page1.cfm) Washington, DC – The Trump admin- sgnnews47_18/page15.cfm and gn.org/ the National Gay & Lesbian Task Force, who istration, through the Department of Health sgnnews47_18/page17.cfm) was on the trip with her husband. and Human Services’ Office for Civil Gay tour group The 53-year-old prince had previously Rights, issued a new rule that expands lived a very closeted life, conforming to the current refusal laws, allowing providers meets with ‘out’ expectations of his family and fulfilling his and institutions involved in the delivery of US House royal obligations, including a marriage that health care to refuse services based on re- Indian prince was never consummated. It was in 2000, ligious or moral convictions. Committee while still not out publicly, that Prince Man- Susan Berke Fogel, of the National Mumbai – Travelers on a tour through In- vendra established the Lakshya Trust, and Health Law Program (NHLP), criticizes okays LGBT dia with Miami Beach-based Source Events in 2007, the year after he came out, he was the administration for ignoring input from engaged in an up-close and personal meet- invited to appear on the “Oprah Winfrey patients and health workers. The new rule discrimination ing at a private reception with Prince Man- Show,” which brought international atten- will likely result in widespread harm to the vendra Singh Gohil, India’s openly gay royal tion to India’s LGBT issues. During the re- health of people all across the country, in- Washington – The House Judiciary who has become one of the country’s most ception, Prince Manvendra announced that cluding those trying to survive in low-wage Committee approved the Equality Act on his dream of establishing India’s first LGBT jobs that provide little to no access to May 1st. The measure would amend feder- center will become a reality this year, and al civil rights laws to include protections for Source Events pledged their financial sup- health care services. “More than 200,000 These news notes have been compiled, port to the project. “My own journey is the members of the public submitted com- sexual orientation and gender identity. When with permission, from the online version reason behind this center. I was disowned ments urging the Trump administration she became speaker in January, Nancy Pe- of various newspapers and other web and disinherited from my ancestral proper- to put patients first,” Fogel said. “Instead, losi said that passing the legislation would sites. We thank these publications for ty after going public about my sexual ori- the Trump administration has ignored the be one of her signature goals, and the mea- allowing us to bring you their news sto- entation,” he said. “I understand the kind public, health care providers, and medical sure went through the Judiciary Committee ries. Usually the reports have been sig- of struggles that LGBTQ men and wom- standards of care. There are already prob- on a straight party-line vote, 22 to 10. The nificantly edited and you can read the en face after coming out, and my hope lematic federal exemptions on the books. bill is now in line for a floor vote. full story by going to the web site men- Trump is dangerously expanding them to The Equality Act prohibits discrimination tioned following the item. Comments is that the Center will provide a safe and allow providers and institutions to deny based on sex, sexual orientation, and gen- are strictly the opinions of Jim Becker empowering space for others to achieve their potential.” t (Q Notes Online – Lain- women, LGBTQ individuals, and others der identity in areas including public accom- and not of Baltimore OUTloud or Pride medically necessary care that is based modations and facilities, education, federal Media. ey Millen at Goqnotes.com/62826/indi- in science and rigorous research. Peo- funding, employment, housing, credit, and an-gay-price-welcomes-events-travelers)

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 7 IMPORTANT FACTS FOR BIKTARVY® This is only a brief summary of important information about BIKTARVY and does not replace (bik-TAR-vee) talking to your healthcare provider about your condition and your treatment.

MOST IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT BIKTARVY POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF BIKTARVY BIKTARVY may cause serious side eects, including: BIKTARVY may cause serious side eects, including: } Worsening of Hepatitis B (HBV) infection. If you have } Those in the “Most Important Information About both HIV-1 and HBV, your HBV may suddenly get worse if BIKTARVY” section. you stop taking BIKTARVY. Do not stop taking BIKTARVY } Changes in your immune system. Your immune system without ﬁrst talking to your healthcare provider, as they may get stronger and begin to ﬁght infections. Tell your will need to check your health regularly for several months. healthcare provider if you have any new symptoms after you start taking BIKTARVY. ABOUT BIKTARVY } Kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare BIKTARVY is a complete, 1-pill, once-a-day prescription provider should do blood and urine tests to check your kidneys. If you develop new or worse kidney problems, medicine used to treat HIV-1 in adults. It can either be used in they may tell you to stop taking BIKTARVY. people who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before, or people who are replacing their current HIV-1 medicines and whose } Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which healthcare provider determines they meet certain requirements. is a serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these BIKTARVY does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS.HIV-1 is the virus symptoms: weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual that causes AIDS. muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, Do NOT take BIKTARVY if you also take a medicine feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or abnormal heartbeat. that contains: } Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. } dofetilide Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these } rifampin symptoms: skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, } any other medicines to treat HIV-1 dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, or stomach-area pain. BEFORE TAKING BIKTARVY } The most common side eects of BIKTARVY in clinical studies were diarrhea (6%), nausea (6%), and headache (5%). Tell your healthcare provider if you: These are not all the possible side eects of BIKTARVY. } Have or have had any kidney or liver problems, including Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any hepatitis infection. new symptoms while taking BIKTARVY. } Have any other health problems. You are encouraged to report negative side eects of } Are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.FDA.gov/medwatch, BIKTARVY can harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare or call 1-800-FDA-1088. KEEP provider if you become pregnant while taking BIKTARVY. Your healthcare provider will need to do tests to monitor your } Are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not health before and during treatment with BIKTARVY. breastfeed. HIV-1 can be passed to the baby in breast milk. HOW TO TAKE BIKTARVY Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines PUSHING. you take: Take BIKTARVY 1 time each day with or without food. } Keep a list that includes all prescription and over-the-counter GET MORE INFORMATION Because HIV doesn’t change who you are. medicines, antacids, laxatives, vitamins, and herbal supplements, and show it to your healthcare provider } This is only a brief summary of important information about and pharmacist. BIKTARVY. Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist to learn more. BIKTARVY® is a complete, 1-pill, once-a-day prescription medicine used to treat } BIKTARVY and other medicines may aect each other. Ask } HIV-1 in certain adults. BIKTARVY does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS. your healthcare provider and pharmacist about medicines Go to BIKTARVY.com or call 1-800-GILEAD-5. that interact with BIKTARVY, and ask if it is safe to take } If you need help paying for your medicine, visit BIKTARVY.com Ask your healthcare provider if BIKTARVY is right for you. To learn more, BIKTARVY with all your other medicines. for program information. visit BIKTARVY.com.

Get HIV support by downloading a free app at BIKTARVY, the BIKTARVY Logo, DAILY CHARGE, the DAILY CHARGE Logo, KEEP PUSHING, LOVE WHAT’S INSIDE, GILEAD, and the GILEAD Logo are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies. Please see Important Facts about BIKTARVY, including important MyDailyCharge.com Version date: December 2018 © 2019 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. BVYC0103 02/19 warnings, on the previous page and visit BIKTARVY.com.

8 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com BVYC0103_BIKTARVY_B_9-875x9-6_BaltimoreOUTloud_KeepPushing1_DR4_r1v1jl.indd All Pages 4/23/19 3:22 PM IMPORTANT FACTS FOR BIKTARVY® This is only a brief summary of important information about BIKTARVY and does not replace (bik-TAR-vee) talking to your healthcare provider about your condition and your treatment.

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 9 BVYC0103_BIKTARVY_B_9-875x9-6_BaltimoreOUTloud_KeepPushing1_DR4_r1v1jl.indd All Pages 4/23/19 3:22 PM VoiceVoice ofof thethe CenterCenter Your 2019 Baltimore Pride Parade Emcee: Monty Howard

Baltimore Pride 2019 is only 45 days away! Each year the Pride Parade Committee se- lects an individual from the community to an- nounce the parade floats and organizations as they travel the parade route up Charles Street. This year’s Pride Parade Emcee is treasure of the sexual and gender minority and faith-based communities—Monty How- ard. Monty was born in California to a military family, so he spent most of his childhood re- locating to various states—a total of 29 times to be exact. He identifies as a gay Episcopa- lian, a graphic designer, and community activist. Monty arrived in Baltimore in 1998 and has been with his partner, Steve Howard for 16 years. In addition to the longevity of his partnership, Monty has also worked in the architectural graphic design business for 37 years and has served as a Big Brother to two siblings for 10 years. He earned a Bachelor of Fine Arts (BFA) in Graphic Design from the Rhode Island School of Design in 1981, and has lived and worked in Virginia, Minnesota, Texas, and Delaware before coming to Balti- more and feeling ‘right at home’ from the start. Since arriving to Charm City, Monty has been an active member of several faith-based and other community organizations. He is a veteran Emcee, having previously served in the role for the Festival in Bolton Hill from 2004-2012 and Quiz Nite on Bolton Hill from 2009-2014. His connections with many of Bal- timore’s groups and institutions will ensure that Baltimore Pride 2019 will be diverse and engaging for all that participate. We hope to see you there! Visit www.baltimorepride.org for more information on the 2019 Baltimore Pride Parade and other Baltimore Pride sponsored events.

10 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com THE LATEST UPDATES FROM THE GAY, LESBIAN, BISEXUAL, AND TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY CENTER OF BALTIMORE AND CENTRAL MARYLAND

Calendar of Events May 17 May 24 Center Work 3:00 PM Pay-What-You-Can Chair Massages at the Center 12:00 PM May 10 Young & the Restless YA Group 6:00 PM Breaking Bread Project 6:30 PM Center Work 3:00 PM Marijuana Anonymous 7:00 PM Community Advisory Council Meeting 6:00 PM Breaking Bread Project 6:30 PM Marijuana Anonymous 7:00 PM May 18 May 25 Queer Families Potluck 11:00 AM Alcoholics Anonymous 6:00 PM May 11 Alcoholics Anonymous 6:00 PM May 26 Alcoholics Anonymous 6:00 PM Mother Helena Hologram’s Pre-Pride Fashion Show 7:00 PM Narcotics Anonymous 11:00 AM May 12 May 19 Gentle Mindful Yoga 3:30 PM Narcotics Anonymous 11:00 AM Narcotics Anonymous 11:00 AM May 28 Gentle Mindful Yoga 3:30 PM Gentle Mindful Yoga 3:30 PM Free & Confidential Testing at the Center 2:00 PM Coming Out Support Group 5:00 PM May 14 New Volunteer Orientation 6:30 PM Free Legal Clinic with MVLS 1:00 PM May 21 May 29 Free & Confidential Testing at the Cente 2:00 PM Free & Confidential Testing at the Cente 2:00 PM The Mankind Project 7:00 PM Dudley Physical Therapy Information Session 5:00 PM SILhouette 7:30 PM Teen Art Group 5:30 PM Sexual Compulsives Anonymous 7:00 PM May 22 Civic Engagement Series: Kelly Cross 6:00 PM May 30 Center Work 3:00 PM Free & Confidential Testing at the Center 2:00 PM May 15 Vogue Night with STAR TRACK 6:30 PM Center Work 3:00 PM The Mankind Project 7:00 PM May 31 The Mankind Project 7:00 PM Sexual Compulsives Anonymous 7:00 PM Marijuana Anonymous 7:00 PM TransBaltimore 7:00 PM Sexual Compulsives Anonymous 7:00 PM May 23 Free & Confidential Testing at the Center 2:00 PM May 16 Helping Hands Clothing Closet 3:00 PM National Honor Our LGBT Elders Day Sistahs of Pride 7:00 PM Free & Confidential Testing at the Center 2:00 PM SOGAA Book Club 7:30 PM Youth Against Oppression 4:30 PM Baltimore Trans-Masculine Alliance 6:30 PM

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 11 thinking outloud

of us. For gay men like me, our questions Community. Viki reduced the job at hand to a stereotype. and I had a con- “Are you comfortable working around versation about My Fabulous gay men?” We asked. She said she was. her book and the “Really?” We pressed her. “Because erasure of wom- there’s a lot of explicit sexuality, because this en in the narra- Disease tive of AIDS. By Mark S. King is HIV, of course. Are you sure you would feel comfortable working here?” Mark S King: “Yes,” she answered Thanks for again, and then added, Straight speaking The First “but you make me wonder to me, Viki. if I would be comfortable women played You know, Ladies of AIDS working with you…” when I think Sue Crumpton not an oversize of wom- only got the job, she led en in the It’s By Mark S. King LA Shanti into a period role in the AIDS arena, a graphic novel written by a My first job in AIDS in the 1980s was at the of growth, program ex- fight against I think of Krishna Stone, one of lesbian nurse, about her expe- Los Angeles Shanti Foundation, an orga- pansion, and heightened all those lesbian nurses the many women pro- riences with AIDS patients. I filed in the book, Fag nization that provided companions for the visibility. And her roots in first. Why are you focus- loved it. It’s another piece of the AIDS. Their Hags, Divas and Moms: dying. When our founding director, Daniel feminism taught me les- ing on straight women? story that hasn’t been told. P. Warner, retired from the organization, the sons I have never forgot- Victoria Noe: I have The Legacy of Straight story gets told Women in the AIDS That outsider status you final candidates for his job met with the full ten. always felt that straight Community. mention comes up a lot in the staff for final interviews. HIV/AIDS history itself in a new book women were true outsiders book. You’re not happy with One of those job candidates, Sue has been similarly skep- in the community. Lesbians the way straight women have Crumpton, had the audacity to be a straight tical about the contribu- were part of the LGBT community al- been left out of the narrative. woman. Trying to replace our gay founder. At tions of straight women. ready, so they were accepted in a way Even now, to a lesser extent, that’s still an AIDS agency. In 1991. Thankfully, HIV activist and author Victo- that straight women were not. The experi- true. I’ve understood the ownership of the Sue’s credentials as a skilled administra- ria Noe helps to set the record straight with ences of straight women were a little differ- epidemic by the gay community. But that tor with a background working on behalf of her new book, Fag Hags, Divas and Moms: ent. Have you read Taking Turns? doesn’t mean straight women weren’t effec- battered women didn’t resonate with some The Legacy of Straight Women in the AIDS No. tive.

To Our Readers and Advertisers With this issue, we begin our 17th year publishing Baltimore OUTloud. Although last year was a bit of a struggle financially, we hope that those problems are behind us as we enter the 2019 Pride season and the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall Rebellion. Our progress on some fronts during the past half-century has exceeded our wildest dreams. But in other areas, we have actually experienced some regression as acceptance by the mainstream has dampened our radical spirit. None the less, we are happy to still be here and thank our advertisers and loyal readers for their com- mitment to the newspaper. We consider it an honor to provide a voice for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer communities of Baltimore, Maryland and parts of the Mid-Atlantic. We look forward to another year of activist journalism as we continue the struggle for our liberation. Thanks again for your support!

12 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com thinking outloud

You don’t pull any punches in terms cluding friends who were lost to AIDS, and of stating your displeasure with gay men another about friends lost who were in the owning the history as well as the services military. Survivor guilt is so common in both and the sympathies of the public. groups. The issues of long-term survivors I don’t discount that at all. The gay com- are very important to me. munity was and continues to be dispropor- Why do long-term survivors strike a tionally affected. But that doesn’t mean there chord with you? aren’t other parts of the story. I’ve heard that I see a lot of survivor guilt among my straight women’s stories were not as im- friends who are long-term survivors. I see portant. When AmFAR wanted to expand the isolation, and the need research to hetero for groups, in the way we transmission, for have veterans groups to instance, the fear support them. There’s a was that gay men lot we can do as a commu- would be left in the nity to support them, and lurch in favor of het- make them secure in the erosexual research. knowledge that we have Isn’t it a shame not forgotten about them. that it always You included my comes down to a mom in your book! contest of sorts, Yeah, I did. hemophiliacs vs My heart stopped Nancy Pelosi gays vs women … when I read the quote with Elizabeth A couple of them surprised me That’s why I in- from her, which opens Taylor, during because they shattered stereo- cluded several wom- the chapter on moms. so specifically to gay white men. congressio- types that I had. The involvement en in the book who It’s something she You’re pissed off about that. nal testimo- of the Junior Leagues, for instance. were told not to get said in my video inter- Yeah, I guess I am. ny about HIV/ I was a member a long time ago, tested. They found out view of her, “What It There’s a real tension there. AIDS. but I did not know they became in- they were positive be- Feels Like for a Mom.” The tension has always been volved in HIV in 1986, and they are cause they insisted on It was perfect. It there. Those issues have always been in still doing HIV services today. the test. That kind of was a perfect expres- the community. What is different now, I think, What were your actual interviews like experience has been sion of what it is to be is that women in the community are much with the women in the book? way too common. “If a mom, speaking as a more pro-active, more vocal, and meeting Most of the women I talked to cried you’re not hemophiliac mom. their own needs in a public way. during the interview. All of them apologized or gay or inject drugs, I then went What needs of theirs are being met, at first, but by the end of the interview they you’re not at risk.” I’ve straight to the bibli- that they are more vocal about? weren’t apologizing for crying. always felt everybody ography just to see her name again. She Taking ownership of their health care. Why? was at risk. Women were trying to take care was a librarian so she would have done Women are more assertive, and less likely to Because they were finally able to tell of their health and were running into road- the same thing, immediately. accept less attention. Women who are work- these stories, and someone was listening to blocks from their own doctors because they I love librarians. They were a big help to ing in the HIV community have become loud- them who thought they were important. didn’t fit a definition of who might test posi- me. er, they are making their presence known. Are you changing the narrative, then? tive. And all those mothers in your book, They are no longer willing to be quiet when I’m correcting it. I’m filling in the gaps You kind of dared yourself to write taking their sons in. That meant cleaning they are the only woman in the room at a that people didn’t know existed. Part of my this. up the vomit and the shit. I mean, that’s meeting. Because that still happens. research included reading a book about the Yeah. I guess I did. When I went to a the nitty gritty, isn’t it? I can also see black men and women history of women in the second half of the panel discussion on this topic at the New Yeah. But you know, they’ve done it all nodding their heads at everything you 20th century. York Public Library, I assumed women’s before. This wasn’t something new just said. I am going to bet that you were not im- stories had been gathered somewhere, and Oh, come on. This was their grown Yeah. We’re seeing more and more pressed with their historical perspective. they hadn’t. Even women’s history books sons they were not supposed to outlive. women of color taking leadership roles and I immediately went to the index of the ignored the epidemic. Women’s health is They were not. Thank God for the moms being very public and vocal. There’s no book, and AIDS was listed on only one page. about reproductive health but never HIV. If who did not turn away their children. You downside to that. That page had one paragraph about wom- you can’t find a book you want to read, you and I know there were far too many of them Speaking of diverse women, I often en in the epidemic, about the fight to have should write it yourself, they say. who did. refer to Positive Women’s Network as the the definition of “AIDS” changed so women So many of the women you write I feared that would be my mom’s fate, most ferocious HIV advocacy group on could get proper treatment and diagnosis. about are fueled by grief. that she would end up taking care of me. the planet right now. Do you agree? They didn’t mention ACT UP or anything. Absolutely. Like the quilt or ACT UP or Outliving her was a real triumph for me, if Absolutely. Very vague. It pissed me off. volunteering, the initial impetus was almost that makes sense. What makes them that way? Well, you getting pissed off seems always grief. We’re still dealing with that to- Absolutely. You spared her that. The same thing that made gay men that to have benefits, like this great book. day. There’s a certain vexation you have way in the beginning. The urgency. The Thanks, Viki. That is fairly universal, isn’t it, in with institutional memory lapses of the need. If they don’t do it, no one is going to You’re welcome! t terms of what brought people into the contributions of women. You return to do it for them. movement. it often in the book. The lack of specif- Did many of the stories you uncov- I wrote a series of books about grief, in- ic services, the organizations catering ered in your research surprise you?

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 13 quality of life // Health and Wellness

that they can only be transmitted by sex- you initially disliked or even feared? ual intercourse, and not in other ways. On Some of the concerns about living occasion it may be emotionally important alone do involve fear and anxiety. I re- for a person to insist that (for example) he member a neighbor, a young man who had or she got Chlamydia from a toilet seat be- Ask been divorced, ask me for help because Open Wide cause it might be awkward or even danger- Dr. J he was absolutely panicked about using a ask Dr Eva ous to admit what really happened. That’s washing machine to do the laundry. Yes, Dr Eva Hersh understandable, but it doesn’t make it real. Janan Broadbent, Ph.D. I can hear the laughter from you all but People who squat on toilets to avoid some relationships reward dependency contact with the seat frequently get the to that level. Then there is a legitimate Can You Get seat wet with urine, dirty from feces Living Alone concern over getting sick when no one is (poop), or from their shoes and are at risk around to help. These are all issues any of falling. I don’t recommend it. human being has to cope with and find That from a People who use lots of toilet paper to I am old enough to remember that once ways of connecting with others and maybe cover the seats of public toilets contribute upon a time, a man – or heaven forbid, a creating a family of sorts with friends. Toilet Seat? to the frequent problems of clogged toilets woman – living alone was frowned But let’s focus more on those and lack of paper. upon. There were all kinds of ex- And loving it who love living by themselves. I Dear Dr. Eva, Most infections people get planations or rumors as to why talk with many people who have I love your columns and ap- Probably are either airborne (breathed they may be doing so. We now relationships they cherish but preciate the variety of topics you in, like influenza or tuberculo- know that there are millions of people in feel equally committed to not sharing address – always sensitively. not, but don’t sis) or fecal-oral, like diarrhea this country and elsewhere who choose hous- I know this sounds nutty, but and hepatitis A. Fecal-oral to live by themselves and en- how safe (or not) are public / forget to wash infections occur when an in- joy every minute of it. There shared toilets? I remember as a fected person does not clean are also those who for different kid my mom would carry those you hands! hands well after a bowel move- reasons end up in the same life- paper toilet seat covers or use ment then shakes another style but are not happy about it. toilet paper before sitting down. My sister person’s hand, touches paper money, or It definitely creates much does the same. But is it really necessary? prepares food. Then the second person consternation when one does Especially if there’s nothing visible on it becomes infected. The place to break that not have a choice in one’s life and you know it’s cleaned nightly? I’ve chain of infection does not relate to toilet circumstances. Losing a partner, been wondering this for years but have use. It is about hand-washing. alienation by one’s family, and been too embarrassed to ask. Let’s consider some more common many other situations may make ;) Thanks!! and less noticed sources of fecal-oral infor a single occupant in housing. ing. In Pee-shy fections, in the bathroom How to adjust? How to reframe it Found fact, some partnerships survive on long- innocent! and elsewhere: as a choice and not one that is imposed on term basis because there is no shared Dear Pee-Shy, • Door knobs and han- us? Is it possible to come to like something abode. Given that no human is an island, It’s not necessary. There is no health dles, especially in the do we look at those people and think problem that is transmitted by sitting on bathroom – the home something is wrong with them? Is living a toilet seat that is dry and appears bathroom as well together some kind of a natural norm? clean. It is also pretty farfetched that as public. Think people touch far more things – and a far Wanting to be close, physically and emo- people would pick up infections from about it: hands, greater number of other people – with their tionally, is what we look for, in mind and wet or dirty toilet seats, either, unless and whatever hands than with their bottoms. Also, money body, but there is nothing that dictates it they had a sore or rash on their own those hands passes through far more individuals’ hands should be on a 24/7 basis. People differ in “seat” (thighs and buttocks). The skin touch after than the number of people who sit on a toi- the amount of space they need. Some like is an important part of the immune wiping and let between cleanings. to be joined at the hip and if the partner system. If there are breaks in the skin, before wash- • Now that swimming weather is here, feels the same way, life is good. Or, if both it makes us more vulnerable to infec- ing, are far remember to wear rubber shoes or flip- want more space, same result. It is when tion, but the main sources of infection more con- flops at the pool to keep from getting ath- we have differing needs that conflict is the are others’ hands, pets, and dirt – not taminated letes’ foot fungus! result.” I want you with me except maybe toilet seats. No one wants to sit in urine, with bacteria • A study showed that only 32% of men for work, but you may want more time to but it’s important to know that urine than buttock and 62% of women wash their hands in yourself, and when you are at work, you normally contains no bacteria. cheeks. Use public bathrooms. It’s a new low! It’s also a better keep in touch too.” How to recon- Even if a urine infection is of a dry paper recipe for frequent illness. Remember that cile that? It is those kinds of dilemmas that present, urine infections towel or dou- to wash your hands effectively you need can strengthen the love, if resolved with are not passed from per- bled toilet pa- to use soap, wash for least 30 seconds, compromises at each end, or dissolves the son to person. per to touch door wash between your fingers, and wash un- love, if one insists on getting their needs Many people have handles, faucets, der your nails. t met at the expense of the other. t concerns about getting and the door of the “Space and light and order. Those are a sexually-transmitted in- bathroom is a smart idea. the things that men (and women) need just fection from a toilet seat. If that’s not practical, apply as much as they need bread or a place to There is no reported case of this hand sanitizer once out of the bathroom. sleep.” – LeCorbusier occurring. At the risk of being obvious: the • Wash hands after handling money. reason sexually-transmitted infections are Money has a greater number and variety called sexually-transmitted infections is of bacteria than a toilet. This is because baltimoreoutloud.com

14 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com quality of life // Health and Wellness Baltimore observance of pelvic physical therapy. She went to the only person in town fitting that bill, who was also Mending a colleague. It was thought at that time that National Honor our Set for the the pain was due to stress and anxiety. The result was that she was referred to counsel- May 16th at Gap ing. While stress and anxiety can exacer- Center Stage Charles Dudley bate pelvic pain it is now better understood LGBT Elders Day that there is often a physical reason for the pain. Alicia moved to Baltimore which meant By Aaron Cahall stone influenced this year’s National Hon- When a Pelvis seeing a different pelvic therapist that lead Chase Brexton Health Care or Our LGBT Elders Day? to a different perspective. There was a nar- The struggles and triumphs of LGBT elders There’s an energy in the air. We’re Needs Some rowing of the vaginal vault (also known as will be remembered during a night of laughter, thinking about our movement and the pace vaginismus) but she also had vestibulitis: inspiration and recognition at Baltimore’s up- at which change has come, and we’re also extra nerve tissue at the vaginal opening coming National Honor Our LGBT Elders Day stinging as we see and feel so much prog- Elvis which made it hypersensitive. She did well event. ress moving backward. This is a dynamic May is National Pelvic Pain Month from which with dilators to stretch and open up the vag- The celebration will take place Thursday, LGBT people are all too familiar with. We an estimated 15% of men and women suffer. inal vault which led to easier intercourse May 16th from 5:30 to 8 pm at Baltimore Cen- have marriage equality, but we don’t have I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Alicia (yeah!). She also did several rounds of Bo- ter Stage, featuring storytelling vignettes from federal non-discrimination protections. We Bolden-Jeffers, a fellow physical therapist tox in order to quiet the nerves. There was community leaders as well as a buffet dinner. have an out gay man running for the highest who not only has treated women also a lot of manual therapy, General admission tickets are $30 and are office, but transgender and men for pelvic pain but is also A chat with in which the therapist released available at Tinyurl. people are banned a survivor of pelvic pain. trigger points in the pelvic floor com/elderday2019. from military service. Pelvic pain in general terms Dr. Alicia muscles, stretched the fascia We asked the I know our elders would be any pain “down there” (elastic connective tissue that Center’s director, Sam will remind us that in the groin, taint, anus, and tail- Bolden- helps hold us together), and McClure, to share a we must continue bone. This can lead to sexual gave Alicia exercises to take preview of the event to do the hard work dysfunction ranging from erec- Jeffers control and use her pelvic floor and discuss its impor- required for real tile dysfunction in men to painful muscles more effectively when tance: change and visibili- penetration in men and women, pain when moving. She now has a healthy baby boy, Why is it so im- ty has always been riding a bike, sitting in the car, or even hav- something she did not think possible at the portant to set aside at the heart and ing a bowel movement. height of her symptoms. a day and hold a cel- soul of that work, Alicia was 19 when she went to her ob- Her story is not unique. A lot of women ebration to honor our so we’re excited to LGBT elders? gyn for her first pap smear. The pain she between the ages of 16 and 21 have the celebrate and hon- It’s not only import- experienced at that time was over after the same issues with the trigger often being or them with our ant to set aside a day, test was done and was written off as normal their first pelvic exam or intercourse. The storytelling event it’s important to cele- when getting a first pap smear. But during trend now is to wait for the first pap smear. on May 16th at brate elders every day. the test, she says, it felt like some- Alicia’s mission is to raise Center Stage. Respect for those with awareness of the benefits The day is now in its fourth year of more experience is an essential element of of pelvic physical thera- celebration. What has the community re- civility. In intergenerational dialogues, we dis- py and I cannot think of a sponse to this effort been, both here in cover we have differing opinions based on our Baltimore and nationwide? better person to go to than experiences and perspectives. I love seeing This is a beloved community tradition Alicia – someone who has elders and youth learning from each other. here in Baltimore and we get lots of inquiries herself been through it, too This year marks the 50th anniversary – an ally. of the Stonewall riots. How has that mile- from other cities that want to start celebra- Men don’t get off the tions. hook that easily! I have How does National Honor Our LGBT seen several men for pelvic Elders Day fit in with the other work the pain and realize men have center is doing to support LGBT elders? a little bit of a different set tercourse. In no matter what case – male, fe- This celebration is the centerpiece of our of circumstances. Keep male, or trans – some of the things that help work to nurture and care for our elders. Our in mind: there is, ahem, a in addition to those listed above is electro- number one concern for our LGBT elders is “vas deferens” between men myography and biofeedback, with the focus social isolation. We have support groups, one had a Bump ’n’ grind’s and women! This means the base- on strengthening what is weak and relaxing and Lunch & Learn events that create oppor- lit match to her vagina. The a gruel for a pelvis line muscles, nerves, and bones are those things that are tight. Nerves are driven tunities to get out and meet folks. At Chase following year, she went in for in pain all the same but a few muscles are by the brain, and if the brain is excited then Brexton, we’re lucky enough to count some another pap smear, but things reoriented based on the expressed so are the nerves. We can retrain things to of our founders among our Elders and we were worse due to the fear and anxiety of gender. Men can also trap nerves around move better and with less pain. t continue to learn from them. t the anticipated pain, and this time she had the sits bones (ischial tuberosities) and also Reach out to Alicia with your questions To join in Baltimore’s celebration of Na- increased blood pressure and sweats. She at the base of the penis around the pubic at [email protected] or 443-219- tional Honor Our LGBT Elders Day 2019, also began to have pain with intercourse. bone (not too dissimilar from vulvadynia). 7683. You can also email me at charles@ visit Tinyurl.com/ElderDay2019. For more on This added even more stress and anxiety The pain can radiate to one side of the pe- dudleypt.com or call/text 443-742-0019 The LGBT Health Resource Center’s older between her and her boyfriend. She want- nis or one testicle, but can also include both. or even fax me at 443-345-3414. All good adult programs and services, go to Chase- ed to be sexual but just couldn’t tolerate the Men, like women, can have a hard time with things start with a conversation. Let’s have brexton.org/LGBTelders. pain. Fortunately, her doctor recommended sitting, walking, running, biking, and also in- yours today! BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 15 quality of life // Health and Wellness

rate going. The slight heart rate increase endeavor to a stereotype (or, even worse, a means more treats for you! joke). For those queer women who have never 2) Try something new! Make sure you The In engaged in scissoring, it makes perfect sense take advantage of as many activities as and why they’d be quick to dismiss it as “some- YouFit possible – such as hiking, snorkeling, or thing that men make women do in porn.” But kayaking – if your destination offers them. Out as someone who has scissored a time or two Here It’s a great opportunity to finally give scuba Andre Shakti in her life, dear reader, I promise that’s not the diving a go and burn some excess energy [only] case! while you’re at it. Taking time to relax and Now that your girlfriend’s argument has Travel Tips: be still is very important while on vacation, been confirmed, here’s some critical informa- but don’t forget to be adventurous. You Scissoring: tion about scissoring. Y’know, just in case you never know what you will discover while want to give it a whirl! Staying Active sneaking in some physical activity. Afraid to Ask? First things first: Scissoring is an ad- 3) Walk through the city. If you’re vanced sex move. It’s not for the weak. It can on Vacation traveling to a city or more of an urban en- Dear Andre, be awkward, inefficient, and there’s a solid vironment, make walking your main form I’m hoping you’ll settle a debate between chance you’ll kick your partner in the face at With summer quickly approaching, people of transportation. Try to avoid taking taxis, my girlfriend and me. She’s been trying to sell some point. It also requires a lot of coordina- are already making travel plans trolleys, or subways to get to me on “scissoring,” but I’ve only ever heard tion and a fair amount of core strength, but to squeeze the most out of sum- Pump iron your destination. Not only will guys talk about it and I’m con- hey, it’s way more fun than mer and maximize on all the sun- you be getting a great workout, vinced this isn’t a real thing that Vulva-to-vulva going to the gym! But all that shine and fun times. Depending when you’re but you’ll also save some mon- authentically queer women do. doesn’t make it pointless. If on where you’re traveling to, you ey while getting a way better What’s the deal? rubbing is the you can manage to get into may not have access to workout not punching glimpse of the hustle and bus- Sincerely, the rhythm of scissoring, it’s equipment. While you’re on va- the clock tle. Alyson B. bee’s knees pretty mind-blowing. Keep cation, it is important to get rest 4) Enjoy your hotel’s in mind, though, if you don’t and relaxation, but that doesn’t pool. If your hotel has a pool, Alyson, enjoy clitoral stimulation and/ mean you can’t also enjoy some physical then take advantage! Not only is a pool Not only is scissoring a real or need a ton of intense, pro- activity! great for getting a tan and relaxing but you thing, but way more queer women engage in longed clitoral stimulation (like the kind provid- Here are some tips to stay active on can also swim laps, which make a great it than you’d initially think! In 2015, the pro- ed by a powerful vibrator) to get off, this may vacation. Whether it’s a trip to the Caroli- low-impact workout for your whole body. gressively feminist web blog Autostraddle con- not end up being your favorite position. nas, backpacking through Spain, or cruis- Create your own swim-aerobics course for ducted an Ultimate Lesbian Sex Survey (open Also, unbeknownst to most, there’s more ing the Caribbean, make sure to squeeze you to complete while soaking in the sun. to all women who sleep with women), and a than one way to do it. Like many sex acts, in some unconventional exercises to keep The challenge will not only get your heart whopping 40.7% of the scissoring is customizable. It can be achieved your body and mind healthy. You might be pumping, but your brain will thank you as 8,556 women who in a variety surprised to read just how easy it can be well. completed the sur- of positions, to stay active when you travel. It’s time for Traveling is one of the best parts about vey said scissoring including some vacation fitness tips! summer, and now you can enjoy your time was a regular part missionary, 1) Always take the stairs. Whether away from your everyday routine with a of their sex lives the cowgirls it’s at your hotel, parking garage sprinkling of fitness mixed in. It (including 43.98% (standard, or somewhere in the city, always credit: doesn’t have to be hard, make it of lesbian-identi- reverse, and opt for the stairs to get your heart jessicalophoto fun! Think outside the gym and fied survey-takers reverse-re- experience a new way to work and 43.48% of verse, ie, riding out – travel style. survey-takers in a ass-grinding), Are you a Youfit Lime Card relationship). and side-by- member? Don’t forget that our So why – if side (also called Lime Card members have un- scissoring is this the dirty spoon limited access to any Youfit lo- prevalent – do or forking). My cation. So, if you happen to be so many LGBTQ personal favor- traveling and find one nearby, folks think it isn’t real? In short, porn ite scissoring you can always pop in to check and the male gaze. See, while scissor- credit: position involves one partner laying out a new location. Visit Youfit. ing is a legitimate sexual position for Autostraddle flat on their back. Then the other part- com/gyms to see all our loca- many, it’s not nearly as common as ner straddles one of their thighs and tions near you, whether you’re it’s depicted or fetishized. For those al- grinds on it while having hand sex home or calling a different city with the reclined partner. Fun abounds! t ready confused, try this: Using your index and home for the summer. middle fingers, make two Vs with both hands. Finally, If you’re rubbing against a surface Visit Youfit Health Clubs on Now rub them together where the webs of the that has hair – like genitals, a chest, a leg, etc Instagram to learn more about hands meet and imagine the webs are two – you might want to add some lube to reduce how you fit in here. Plus, if you sets of genitals. Congratulations, you’re scis- any unwanted pulling or chafing. There’s a are on vacation take a quick soring! noticeable comfort difference between “dry” snapshot of how you stay fit There’s something about the grinding of and “wet” grinding. To optimize enjoyment, while on your getaway. Use two vulvas together that drives men crazy, I recommend using either Swiss Navy’s Sili- #YoufitTravels and share it and since male fantasy narratives permeate cone Lubricant or one of Sliquid’s many wa- with us! so much of our culture, scissoring at some ter-based Lubricants. Best of luck to you! t point transitioned from a private pleasurable 16 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com SPIRITUAL DIRECTORY Baltimore Ethical Society Govans Presbyterian Church 306 W Franklin Street, #102 5828 York Road. Worship Baltimore, MD 21201 Baltimore MD 21212 Sunday, 11a.m. 410-581-2322. baltimoreethicalsociety.org 410-435-9188. govanspres.org Christian Bolton Street Synagogue Interfaith Fairness Education Classes 212 West Coldspring Lane Coalition of MD Sunday, 9:45 a.m. Baltimore, MD 21210 P.O. Box 13132 410-235-5354. boltonstreet.org Baltimore MD 21203 browndowntown.org 410-233-5555. ifcmd.org 1316 Park Ave., Balt., MD, 21217 Brown Memorial Park Avenue 410.523.1542 Presbyterian Church MCC of Baltimore 1316 Park Avenue 405 West Monument Street. Baltimore MD 21217 Baltimore MD 21201 410-523-1542. browndowntown.org 410-669-6222 mccbaltimore.org Chevrei Tzedek Congregation 3101 Fallstaff Road Memorial Episcopal Church Baltimore MD 21209 1407 Bolton Street 443-992-7485. chevreitzedek.org Baltimore MD 21217 410-669-0220 Congregation Beit Tikvah memorialepiscopal.org 5802 Roland Avenue Baltimore MD 21210 New Light MCC 410-464-9402. beittikvah.org 40 W. Church Street Hagerstown MD 21740 Emmanuel Episcopal Church 301-797-5698 811 Cathedral Street newlightmcc.com Baltimore, MD 21201 410-685-1130. emmanueldowntown.org The Church of the Advent 1301 South Charles Street First and Franklin Street. Baltimore, MD 21230 Presbyterian Church 410-539-7804 210 W. Madison Street advent-baltimore.org 䄀䰀䰀䄀刀䔀圀䔀䰀䌀伀䴀䔀 Baltimore MD 21201-4693 410-728-5545. firstfranklin.org Veritas United Church 䴀愀猀猀匀挀栀攀搀甀氀攀 of Christ 匀愀琀甀爀搀愀礀㔀㨀㌀瀀⸀洀 First Unitarian Church of Baltimore 22 N Mulberry Street., Suite 113 匀甀渀搀愀礀㤀愀⸀洀⸀Ⰰ ㄀㨀㐀㔀愀⸀洀⸀Ⰰ ㄀㈀㨀㄀㔀瀀⸀洀 1 West Hamilton Street. Hagerstown, MD 21740 刀攀挀漀渀挀椀氀椀愀琀椀漀渀椀猀愀瘀愀椀氀愀戀氀攀匀愀琀甀爀搀愀礀猀愀琀㐀㨀㌀瀀⸀洀⸀ 琀漀㔀瀀⸀洀⸀ Baltimore MD 21201 240- 310-6891 410-685-2330. firstunitarian.net veritashagerstown.com 䌀漀渀琀愀挀琀匀琀⸀ 䈀攀爀渀愀搀攀琀琀攀倀愀爀椀猀栀 Grace United Methodist Church 䐀攀愀挀漀渀䘀爀攀搀倀愀猀猀愀甀攀爀㠀㄀匀琀攀瘀攀渀猀漀渀刀漀愀搀 5407 North Charles Street 匀攀瘀攀爀渀Ⰰ 䴀愀爀礀氀愀渀搀㈀㄀㄀㐀㐀ⴀ㈀㈀㤀㤀 Baltimore, MD 21210 倀愀爀椀猀栀䄀搀洀椀渀椀猀琀爀愀琀漀爀 410-433-6650. graceunitedmethodist.org 㐀㄀ ⴀ㤀㘀㤀ⴀ㈀㜀㠀㌀㐀㄀ ⴀ㤀㘀㤀ⴀ㈀㜀㠀㌀

Chevrei Tzedek Congregation 3101 Fallstaﬀ Road, Baltimore, MD 21209 [email protected] www.chevreitzedek.org The Source for the lgbtq community (443) 992-7485 To advertise in our Spiritual directory RABBI RORY KATZ JTS Gladstein Fellow please call 410-802-1310 BaltimoreOutloud.com An informal, Welcoming, Participatory, Conservative Jewish Community

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 17 Cockpit In Court Lively Arts // out on the rink

Summer Theatre —continued from page 1

with the skaters while they are doing their 2019 Subscriptions choreography. Someone who is watching his video will feel like they are right out there with the skaters. This videotape will 2019 SEASON PRODUCTIONS: then be edited and sent all around the June 14 - June 30; Mainstage country.” Birch added, “Most of the ice rinks today have televisions in their lobbies like MEN ON Disaster! you’d see in an airport. One of the loops Greg brings home a dog he found in the we are hoping will air on these televisions park, or that has found him, bearing the will be this one-minute choreography. We name "Sylvia" on her name tag. A also hope this is the beginning of a na- street-smart mixture of Lab and Poodle, tionwide program for an organization in Sylvia becomes a major bone of contention our governing body of our sport called ‘Ice between husband and wife. Men.’ Ice Men was a group started with a few men figure skating a few years ago to June 15 - June 30; Cabaret help unite the male skaters in our sport. In some rinks around the country, there is skaters. WhatICE we are trying to do with this only one male skater and they often-times particular program is elevate the Ice Men Sylvia don’t have a chance to meet other male from program development at US Figure Greg brings home a dog he found in the park, or that Skating to a fully-funded program that will has found him, bearing the name "Sylvia" on her go nationwide. We hope to have US Figure name tag. A street-smart mixture of Lab and Poodle, Skating hopefully lend more support to the t Sylvia becomes a major bone of contention between growth of this program.” husband and wife. For more info, visit Thenexticeage.org. baltimoreoutloud.com July 6 - July 9; Lecture Hall Aladdin Jr. MAY 22 - JULY 28 The beloved story of a “diamond-in-the-rough” street rat has been given the royal treatment! This new adaption of the 1992 Academy Award®-winning film and 2014 hit Broadway show features expanded characters, new songs and more thrills. It’s sure to open up “a whole new world” for your young performers. July 19 - August 4; Mainstage Nice Work If You Can Get It A hilarious new screwball comedy, Nice Work If You Can Get It pokes fun at the Prohibition era in a clash of elegant socialites and boorish bootleggers, all set to the glorious songs of 410-730-8311 George and Ira Gershwin. TobysDinnerTheatre.com Due to the nature of theatrical bookings, July 20- August 4; Cabaret all shows and dates are subject to change. The Unexpected Guest Lost in the fog, a stranger seeks refuge in a nearby house only to find a man shot dead and his wife standing over him with a smoking gun. A tangled web of lies reveals family secrets and chilling motives, where the real murdered turns out to be the greatest mystery of all.

GET YOUR SEASON SUBSCRIPTION NOW AUGUST 1 - SEPTEMBER 8

18 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com Lively Arts // personalities

in the crowd smiling up at you and singing your songs back to you. The people are the best part. The planes, rental cars, and Maybe Stars in His Eyes long drives are another story. You have to “Bones” is another incredibly mov- learn to stay centered and that’s no easy By Gregg Shapiro and stop stigmatizing faith because of the ing song from Maybe Stars. What can task when you’re in a different location ev- Queer singer/songwriter Bobby Jo Valen- bad examples. Instead, we should be point- you tell me about it? ery day. tine is that rare out artist who isn’t shy about ing to people who are using their faith to Oh man, that’s a song that still gets me How would you say that crowdfund- his faith. Raised in the church, Valentine create a more loving world, lifting them up; and can be hard to sing. It’s just about our ing, via Patreon for instance, has worked has found a way to make expanding what faith can own tendency to self-sabotage our lives. for you when it comes to financing your those two sometimes be. I hope my songs’ uni- When I look back on my life with some emo- recordings? conflicting aspects of his An interview versal themes and messag- tional honesty, I have to admit that a lot of Fans have been the number one reason life work in harmony. For es about love, acceptance, my pain has been self-inflicted. This song why I’ve been able to continue this creative instance, the live perfor- with Bobby Jo and hope can offer some is just admitting that to the world, and I’ve work and do it professionally. The crowd- mance schedule on his Valentine examples of that. found, performing it, that once it’s out there, funding piece of it is such a benefit. With website (in July at the As a creative artist, a lot of people identify with that, and then the help of Patreon and other crowdfunding time of this interview) includes dates at both what do accolades such as winning feel less alone. Sometimes a song is build- resources, I’m able to spend less time on Pride festivals and churches. Talk about Songwriter of the Year at West Coast ing community around shared experience. the business side of music and more time versatility! One thing’s for sure, chances Songwriter’s Association, in 2011 and In this song, that experience is pain. But on the creative side. It’s incredibly valuable are good that you will hear Valentine sing- 2015, as well as Song of the Year in 2017, there’s a beauty in admitting that and that’s to me! ing songs from his luminous new album mean to you? what the song is trying to express. You shared a poem by the late, les- Maybe Stars (BobbyJoValentine.com). I think they gave me a little extra Lesbian singer/songwriter Margrit bian poet Mary Oliver on your Facebook Gregg Shapiro: Bobby Jo, when did strength to keep going in moments of self- Eichler, of the band True Margrit, pro- page in 2018. Can you please say some- you begin playing guitar and how soon doubt. They didn’t come with any huge cash duced the song “Back to the Moon.” thing about after that did you begin to write songs? prize, or exposure to a giant fan base, but How did you come Bobby Jo Valentine: I got a guitar right what they did was help me realize that before I left for college. The school was a my music was connecting with people very strict, conservative, religious place. and was worth sharing. That’s important I really wanted something that I could ex- when you constantly find yourself swim- press myself with and explore my own ming in a giant sea of music and musi- thoughts and opinions and poetry. I wrote cians, wondering if what you say has any some while I was in college, but just off and worth. It’s like a little extra hope you’re on. It wasn’t until (I was) around 23 that I able to lean on in the harder times. really started pursuing writing and making it “Strong Enough” is one of the most a big piece of my life. universal and powerful songs on Maybe Which presented more challenges for Stars, with a message that is especially you, coming out as a gay man or coming meaningful during these increasingly out as a gay Christian? difficult times. Please say something Wow, great question. Coming out as about the genesis of the song. a gay man in the culture I was in was ex- Thank you! Well, I grew up in a small tremely difficult, but I’d met a wonderful school where anyone who was different man who really helped support me through was an easy target for bullying. And I was it. We were together for over seven years. usually the different one. I liked reading, I As far as my faith goes, I feel it’s a thing was a bit more thoughtful and introverted, I’m constantly learning and discovering I wasn’t super interested in sports or the Bobby Jo Valentine new things about, so it’s always hard for latest trends, and it wasn’t a big enough me to want to label it. I’d describe myself place where that could be seen as “cool” as a hopeful, Jesus-leaning, poetic mys- or “counterculture.” It was just made fun of. tic [laughs]. Jesus was about love, about And while the physical pranks are things the role that contem- peace, about fighting powers that used fear I can laugh at now, a lot of the words still to work together? porary poetry plays in your life? to control people, about healing. A lot of the stick with me, and took a lot longer to heal. Margrit was recommended to me by I read it every morning and take it like people that use his name do the opposite of That song is about internal wounds and another fantastic artist, Kress Cole. We re- vitamins. To me, poetry, like any good song, that now. The word “Christian” has so much how it’s a lot harder to break free from a corded that song in a day, I think. The guitar has the ability to come in through the side baggage now, and it’s frustrating that the negative idea you’ve been attacked with and vocal is from the very first take. The door of our hearts and minds and move us negative side always gets the headlines. than for your body to heal a scratch or process was super smooth and Margrit is a more powerfully than anything else can. The truth is, there are faith communities bruise. In the gay culture, many of us can joy to work with. Mary Oliver’s “The Journey”, in particular, is that love, support, and are excited to accept act like everything bounces off us, and that You are currently on a multi-city con- one of the poems that completely changed gay people in most towns around the coun- attitude is usually a shield built up from past cert tour. What are the challenges and my life. I’d recommend everyone to read it, try, but the unaccepting faith communities wounds. This song was just me being hon- rewards of performing live and touring? and poetry, in general, if they want a more are what make the news. So, a lot of gay est about the power words can have over The biggest challenge I’d say is the open heart and a sweeter spirit. t people cut spirituality out of their lives alto- us, but also about finding our “true name” travel. Being away from home really wears gether in response, and that’s such a sad once we know who we truly are, and our on you. The rewards are meeting new peo- result. Our soul is a big piece of who we value in the world, then those words do lose ple and experiencing them connecting to are. I hope we get permission to explore it some of their power. your music, and also seeing familiar faces

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 19 Lively Arts // out on screen What’s Cooking? By Gregg Shapiro Award-winning filmmaker Crystal Moselle boy skaters is nice enough to give her a makes her dramatic feature directing de- board. Camille doesn’t answer her moth- but with Skate Kitchen (Magnolia). While er’s calls to her cell. She begins to stay at it’s at least 20 minutes too long, Skate Janay’s house. Kitchen (the first of 2018 skateboarding Things escalate when her mother movies – the second being Jonah Hill’s comes to the skate park, embarrassing and Mid90s) is nevertheless worth seeing for then slapping Camille. Camille packs her the performances Moselle things and leaves home gets out of her cast of mostly for good. Unfortunately, newcomers. Skate Kitchen is Camille’s life becomes Camille (Rachelle Vin- complicated again when berg), a socially-awkward 18 a skateboarding she becomes attracted year old, lives with her single saga to Devon (Jaden Smith), mother (Elizabeth Rodriguez a photographer, skate- from “Orange is the New Black”) on Long boarder, and stock clerk at the supermar- Island. She enjoys going to the skateboard ket where she works. Devon, as it turns out, park and working on her skating skills. She is the heartbreaker ex-boyfriend of Janay. also posts videos of herself skateboarding When word gets out that they’ve been on Instagram. When she takes a serious hanging out together, Camille’s newfound fall at the local skateboard park, getting social world banged up and “credit carded” in her genital region, she is treated by a gynecologist in the emergency room. Her overprotective mother’s main concern is that she might have done something to herself that would affect her ability to have children. On the day Camille has her RHIANNON stitches removed, her mother makes her promise she won’t skate anymore. Camille acquiesces, but as soon as her mother leaves for work, GIDDENS she catches a train into the city with & MEMBERS OF THE her skateboard in hand. At a Low- er East Side skate park she meets BALTIMORE SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA Kurt (Nina Moran), a baby butch who follows her on Instagram, telling the other female skaters, Janay (Ardelia Lovelace), Indigo and photographer THURSDAY, MAY 16 8:30 PM Ruby (Kabrina Adams) that Camille is “mad good.” Singer and multi-instrumentalist Rhiannon Giddens has taken the folk world As she connects with these other by storm, winning a Grammy for Best Traditional Folk Album with The Carolina young female skaters, we see Camille Chocolate Drops and receiving critical acclaim for her solo career. Hear the transform before our eyes. She has 2017 MacArthur "Genius Grant" winner who is revitalizing decades of American found her crew and a place to belong. roots music with invigorating style. Pretty soon, she’s sneaking out of the house with her skateboard on a regu- Starting at 6 PM, enjoy a pre-concert party with music from Caleb Stine, happy lar basis and hanging out with her new “Skate Kitchen” friends. hour drink specials and food from our favorite Baltimore restaurants. Camille is aware she’s not as cool as comes crashing down on her.

MADE POSSIBLE BY THE WALLACE FOUNDATION • MEDIA PARTNERS: WTMD | BALTIMORE MAGAZINE the others: she doesn’t get high, she’s not While some potentially bleak scenarios SUPPORTING SPONSOR: PNC • BEVERAGE SPONSORS: THE BREWER’S ART | NATIONAL BOHEMIAN BEER a hugger, she’s naive. But it’s her talent on arise, it’s not all doom and gloom. Camille BOORDY VINEYARDS | BALTIMORE SPIRITS COMPANY a skateboard that guarantees her a place is able to mend the broken wheels in her in the group. life and live to skate another day. DVD Just as things begin to go well for her, special features include deleted scenes, conflicts arise. She misses the last train a photo gallery and a pair of behind the JOSEPH MEYERHOFF SYMPHONY HALL home from the city, gets home late, and scenes shorts. TICKETS FROM $25 • BSOMUSIC.ORG/PULSE • 410.783.8000 fights with her mother, who then takes Rating: B. t her board away. This doesn’t stop Camille from returning to the city where one of the

20 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com Lively Arts // BETWEEN THE COVERS

Beginning in 1912 and continuing mance novel by into the 21st century, Correspondents Gary Garth Mc- Creative Reading (Grove, 2019), the second novel by Cann, involves By Gregg Shapiro Within (Arthur A. Levine/Scholastic, 2019) gay writer/activist Tim Murphy, author Lenny, the manag- Pride 2019 is taking on special meaning with tells the story of Celi Rivera, whose life of 2016’s brilliant Christodora, is every er of a struggling the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall riots be- “swirls with questions” about her first crush bit as powerful and epic in breadth and bookstore, his fideli- ing incorporated into celebrations across the on a boy, the changes taking place in her scope. ty issues with Dave, country. With that in mind, it’s never too early body and the way her best friend Magda ex- Straight novelist/ally Elinor Lip- and his flirtation to begin assembling a reading list for the cel- plores gender-fluidity. man is no stranger to writing about with grad student ebration as well as for the summer of 2019. Adult books – Original co-founding queer characters (read 2009’s The Ian which threatens Visit your favorite indepen- member of the Violet Quill Club, poet Family Man) and her hilarious and to upend every- dent bookseller or the love- / novelist / memoirist Felice Pica- touching new novel, Good Riddance thing. it-or-hate-it Amazon.com to Pride 2019 no’s new novel Justify My Sins: (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 2019) Michael G. reserve and order copies of A Hollywood Novel in Three Acts about the troubles associated from a Williams has de- these forthcoming LGBTQ reading list (Beautiful Dreamer Press, 2018), discarded yearbook and a nosy neigh- scribed his science books for readers of all which incorporates “noted names bor, is no exception. fiction detective (rainbow) stripes. and events” of the 1970s through the In Nirvana Is Here (Three Rooms novel A Fall in Au- Poetic paths – It’s hard to believe that 1990s, is described by the author as “one of Press, 2019) his first novel since 2005’s in- tumn (Falstaff Books, 2019), set in 9172 and The Tradition (Copper Canyon Press, the most rational, pleasant, and easy expe- credible Faith For Beginners, gay writer Aar- featuring gay protagonist Valerius Bakhoum 2019) is only the third full-length collec- riences he can recall.” on Hamburger follows historian Ari on his (“a washed-up private eye and street hustler”) tion by gay African-American poet Jericho The latest installment in James Earl quest to reconnect with (straight) high school as “a little filthy and a lot of fun.” Brown, because he’s such a constant and Hardy’s B-Boy Blues series, Men of the crush Justin, while also dealing with a crisis For readers of various ages – Cele- invigorating presence in the world, but it’s House (IAJ Books, 2018) tells the story of involving his ex-husband, all set against the brations of families with same-gender par- true! A poetic examination of terror, The Brooklyn-based high school senior Raheim, backdrop of “the meteoric rise and fall of the ents, My Two Dads and Me and My Two Tradition incorporates Brown’s literary de- the oldest child of a gay male couple, who band Nirvana and the #metoo movement.” Moms and Me (both Doubleday, 2019) by vice known as the duplex, a form that merg- has his hands full balancing his relationship A letter from a son, Little Dog, to a Michael Joosten and Izak Zenou features es the sonnet, the ghazal, and the blues. with girlfriend Maxine, admissions offers mother, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous a variety of kids having breakfast, going to In the “fore/words” to her new poet- from Ivy League universities and creating (Penguin Press, 2019), the debut novel by the park, having lunch, enjoying a playdate, ry collection Sweet World (CavanKerry an identity for himself. award-winning gay poet Ocean Vuong, going to the pool, eating dinner and reading Press, 2019), multi-award-winning lesbian In The Stars of Locust Ridge (Vivid traces the history of a family, from Vietnam a bedtime story, all under the watchful eyes poet Maureen Seaton asks the reader for Imagery, 2018) his third novel since 2017, to America, and the events that shaped the of two dads and two moms. forgiveness for having “mixed up magic with prolific writerC raig Moody takes us to rural lives of the characters. Lesbian poet/novelist Lesléa Newman grief, love with terror, light with impenetra- Tennessee (in the Great Smoky Mountains “Set in the glamorous literary and film (author of Heather Has Two Mommies), re- ble darkness” in these Colorado-created near Dolly Parton’s childhood home) and circles of 1950s Italy,” Leading Men (Viking, turns with her latest children’s book Gittel’s poems written during the “decision-making introduces readers to teenaged Genevieve, 2019), the fourth novel by gay writer Chris- Journey: An Ellis Island Story (Abrams, of breast cancer treatment.” in this coming-of-age tale. topher Castellani features Truman Capote, 2019), in which the titular character must Described as an exploration of “queer, Lesbian novelist Nina Revoyr says that Tennessee Williams, Williams’ lover Frank make the voyage alone, from her old coun- Asian American femininity,” the “Turing her new novel A Student of History (Akashic Merlo and “legendary film icon Anja Bloom.” try shtetl to America, with stunning illustra- Test-inspired” poems in Soft Science (Alice Book, 2019), “is an LA story, but it is also an Taylor Saracen joins gay authors St. tions by Amy June Bates. James Books, 2019) by writer/performer/ American story,” about economic disparity, Sukie de la Croix (Chicago Whispers) and The debut young-adult novel by gay educator Franny Choi are a thrill to behold. history and “invisible aristocracy,” all wound Jim Elledge (The Boys of Fairytown) in ex- poet, novelist and playwright R. Zamora Celebrating the 200th anniversary of the around the country’s “complexity and diversi- ploring the queer past of Chicago’s notorious Linmark, The Importance of Being Wilde birth of legendary “gay poet-preacher” Walt ty,” as narrator Rick becomes involve with two and openly gay Towertown neighborhood of at Heart (Delacorte Press, 2019), tells the Whitman, Lovejets: Queer Male Poets on powerful and irresistible women. Revoyr’s de- the 1920s in her novel In the City by the tale of Ken Z, seeking guidance from the 200 Years of Walt Whitman (Squares & but novel The Necessary Hunger (Akashic Lake (13 Red Media, 2019). late “Oscar Wilde, Patron Saint of Rebels Rebels, 2019), edited by Raymond Luczak, Book, 1997/2019) has been reissued with an In Todd Sweeney: The Fiend of Fleet and Bookworms,” in regards to his blos- features the work of 80 (!) gay poets includ- introduction by Lynell George. High (Hosta Press, 2019), gay writer David soming love for “beautiful, mysterious Ran.” ing the aforementioned Jericho Brown, as One of the most eagerly awaited books Pratt takes the story of Sweeney Todd in a Award-winning gay young-adult author well as Edmund White, David Trinidad, Bry- of the year, Stella Maris & Other Key West new and entertaining direction, setting the Bill Konigsberg’s The Music of What an Borland, Scott Hightower, Alfred Corn, Stories (Turtle Point Press, 2019), the sec- story in a high school where the titular char- Happens (Arthur A. Levine Books, 2019) is Felice Picano, Jaime Manrique, and M. J. ond book by award-winning gay writer Mi- acter, along with pal Nellie Lovett, comes to told by “comfortably gay” Max and “never Arcangelini, to mention a few. chael Carroll, in which he makes the political the rescue of best friend Toby Ragg in an been kissed” Jordan in alternating chapters Everything you need to know about personal, set in the “beautiful town, Key West, unexpected way. as their romance buds and they struggle LGBTQ Fiction and Poetry from Appala- the last bastion, the place of the just-misfits.” Gay novelist Henry Alley’s new book with their own secrets. chia (West Virginia University Press, 2019), Sexual identity and self-acceptance be- Men Touching (Chelsea Station Editions, How It Feels to Float (Dial, 2019), the edited by Jeff Mann & Julia Watts, can be come a major through-line in Anatomy of a 2019) is set in 1986, where Seattle-based debut young-adult novel by Australia-based found in the descriptive title. The first of its Miracle (Hogarth, 2018/2019), the new novel Vietnam vet Robb attempts to take action re- Helena Fox shares the story of Biz, who kind collection features poems by Nickole by Jonathan Miles, featuring the subtitle “The garding his drug addiction as his high-school “knows how to float, right there on the sur- Brown, Aaron Smith, Dorothy Allison and ‘True’ Story of a Paralyzed Veteran, a Missis- teacher partner Bart faces the prospect of face,” while those around her have no idea Kelly McQuain, as well as short stories by sippi Convenience Store, a Vatican Investi- coming out to his family while dealing with a about her “dark, runaway thoughts,” which Silas House, Fenton Johnson and others. gation, and the Spectacular Perils of Grace.” friend dying of AIDS complications. include kissing Grace and her desire to Told in verse, straight writer Aida Sala- The paperback edition “Extra Libris” edition The Shape of the Earth (Bold Strokes bring back her father who died when she zar’s debut young-adult book The Moon includes essays, reader’s guides and more. Books, 2019), the new full-length erotic ro- was seven. t

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BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 23 out in the valley Hagerstown Hopes: Open Meeting and Updates by Brian George Hose It’s been another busy month for us at Hagerstown Hopes! We recently hosted Gives, a fundraising event for nonprofits Should there be any concerns, Lt. Fetchu our first ever LGBTQ+ prom, attended by in Washington County, and our first ever will address them and act as a liaison. We dozens of young people from three states. Pride Night Out at Municipal Stadium. Prom was our first event exclusively for We will also have a special guest at the “We’re also making it young people in our community, and we’re meeting. Lt. Becky Fetchu of the Hager- glad that everyone (including the chaper- stown Police Department will be joining us easier to stay up-to- ones) had a great time! A lot of work went to listen to our concerns and answer ques- date on our work and on behind the scenes to make prom a suc- tions about her new role as HPD’s LGBTQ erment. This is a wonderful opportunity for cess, and we’re just getting started! liaison officer. We recently met with Lt. Fet- what we’re doing in us to work with young adults and provide If you’d like to learn more about our chu and are pleased to have a supportive the information and resources necessary work, along with new opportunities to vol- and affirming ally working with us. In her the community. The to promote understanding and acceptance. unteer, please join us at our open meeting! role as liaison officer, Lt. Fetchu will be the Hagerstown Hopes We’re also making it easier to stay up- Our open meeting is scheduled for Tues- go-to for all police matters affecting the to-date on our work and what we’re doing day, May 14th at the Hagerstown Hopes LGBTQ community. Though she will not newsletter is now up in the community. The Hagerstown Hopes Hub at 6:30 pm. This will be our second personally handle every case involving a newsletter is now up and running and will open meeting at the Hub (22 North Mulber- member of our community, she will provide and running.” be sent to our email list at the beginning of ry Street, Hagerstown) in suite 016 (base- education, trainings, and resources for all every month. Each edition of the newslet- ment level). You can expect updates on re- officers to ensure that our community is hope you’ll join us in welcoming Lt. Fet- ter contains updates on our work, oppor- cent events, including Washington County treated fairly and with dignity and respect. chu to the community and supporting her tunities to get involved, and a list of up- as she works to ensure that all members coming events. There are several ways to of our community feel safe and protected. sign up for the newsletter via our website: There are also a number of exciting HagerstownHopesMD.org new developments we look forward to Mark your calendars for Hagerstown telling you about. We’re making signif- Pride! Hagerstown Pride is scheduled icant progress in developing our youth for July 13th. The theme is “Love Grows” group, thanks to feedback from some of in honor of the 50th anniversary of the our guests at the prom. Now that we know Stonewall Riots that launched the fight for what the youth want, we’re putting finish- LGBTQ civil rights. We hope to see you ing touches on a number of details. We’re there! t hoping to have an information session for youth in the month of June, so please stay posted for updates. The Keystone Gay Rodeo Association is a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt Now that we’ve laid the founda- non-pro t organization whose purpose is to promote the tion for our outreach services and events, we expect to have many country and western lifestyle and rodeo type events within more opportunities for volunteers. the LGBT community and their allies. We hope you’ll join us at the open meeting to tell us about yourself and Do you enjoy any of the following activities? how you’d like to be involved with •Social Events including country music and dancing. Hagerstown Hopes. We’d also like •Meeting new people and making new friends. to hear the community so we know how to better serve you. If you aren’t •Helping other community organizations by volunteering and able to attend the meeting, please raising much needed funds. feel free to reach out to us through Facebook or our website, Hager- •Trail riding, open horse shows, stownHopesMD.org rodeos and other horse related events. We’re also continuing our outreach work with Shepherd Univer- sity. We were asked to participate If so, then KSGRA membership may in the planning of a series of events be for you. To join visit our website for the fall semester to address diversity, inclusiveness, and empow- at ksgra.org

24 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com out in the valley

him and I took a deep breath and fought we could make a difference after all, and I back the lump in my throat. And I told this wanted to be part of that. man that he did not need to speak to me It wasn’t always that way for me, that way. And then I braced for the blow- Brian’s though. My experience, which I think many Asher’s back and rage from this six-foot-tall bur- of us share in one way or another, is that ly man who towered over my miniscule Brain of the outsider. I grew up in a rural area World frame. And he looked at me, and as I felt Brian George Hose before LGBTQ persons were visible in Asher Kennedy the lump rising in my throat and the feeling the media. No one I knew had any open- of wanting to let the waterworks flow was ly LGBTQ friends or relatives, and as a growing, it took me a minute to realised One Year Later young adult I often felt like I was the only Breaking that the words he had spoken were “I’m one. I knew that there were other people sorry.” like me, I just didn’t know where to find My Chains He apologized again when he came up The last year of my life is a blur, a series of them. There was a community, but I wasn’t to the desk to get his new keys, and then events that feels like one long day. Sure, part of it. I was on the outside. Today, a guest yelled at me. Usually I deal yet again. He also made a point to shake there are highlights and landmarks, events Being the outsider isn’t easy. I had to with one to two disgruntled (re: absolutely my hand, and I assured him that we were that stand out and memories I’ll never for- conceal parts of myself to stay safe, and brutish) guests on a shift. It is currently at as cool as cucumbers aspire to be. It took get; but still, all the days run together and during that process I learned to internalize the halfway point in my shift this evening, me an hour to really process the outcome I often find myself remembering having a a lot of things that weren’t good for me, and I am on my second hand of counting of events. I stood my ground, and some- conversation, but not with whom or when. things like shame and guilt and self-ha- individuals who just needed to use me as one apologized. They did not turn into The Or, I remember an event, but not when it tred. The world was a different place then an emotional outlet. On one hand I am Hulk and rip my limbs from my torso, and took place. It’s almost as though I’ve lost and I felt it was my “fault” for being differ- sympathetic – there is nothing more ex- they did not admonish what I said. Staying all sense of time. ent. I knew I wanted to belong, to be part hausting than an entire day of traveling. calm worked. Keeping my This occurred to me a few days ago of the community, but I also thought that As someone who has been all composure worked. when I was leaving a meeting at the Hag- would never be possible. over this country and a couple I stand here now com- erstown Hopes Hub. We had met to dis- That was half a lifetime ago and things international places, traveling pletely floored that simply cuss ways we can better serve the com- are different now. I’m happier and I love is exhausting. Vacationing is stating that speaking at me munity and, as we were gathering our the work I get to do with Hagerstown wonderful – the get- actually corrected the bad belongings and saying our goodbyes, we Hopes. It doesn’t bother me that I’ve lost ting there is behaviour! I think a lot of my in- realized something: it was May first. all sense of time because a lot of my not. Howev- ner turmoil stems from growing up time has been spent build- er, as a front female in a patriarchal world, never ing and supporting the desk agent, wanting to be labelled as an “itch-b,” community that I always I can control and now as a man, never wanting to wanted to be part of. And, very little out- be seen as hot-headed. So, I cling to the along the way, I’ve met side the scope o f far opposite side of the spectrum of emo- so many others who have my desk. I cannot fix heavy traffic, unruly tions. It felt nice to break free from that, always wanted the same children, weather, accidents, construction even if for just one tiny minute. To be the thing for themselves. or anything that is not accessible from my one that admonishes and instead of feel- As I left the meeting desk. By the tone of some people I interact ing admonished. And if nothing else, that I realized that I (and we) with, you would think I am Zeus and hurl- have been busy because ing lightning bolts in rapid succession at “When I have had the world is now validat- some of them, and the way some of them ing us for these negative treat me, doing just that has sometimes guests or customers experiences. Organiza- crossed my mind. or managers feel the tions, including the city However, I am the most non-confron- and the police depart- tational person you could meet. Outside of need to speak to me ment, want to work with my realm of quip-happy columns and ar- us so that others won’t ticles, I am a head-down type of person. in a scolding manner, have the same negative experiences Outside of social events that are attend- I usually shut down. I May first is an important day for Hag- we’ve had. They recognize that a world ed by people I am close to, I am content erstown Hopes. It was on this day, a year that isn’t inclusive is a dangerous world to sit in a corner and eat quietly until the am six years old again ago, that our community center, the Hag- for outsiders. Times have changed, and event is over. The most Libra trait about erstown Hopes Hub, first opened for busi- we play an important role in shaping the myself is that I will choose to eat the wrong and my mother just ness. Back then I wasn’t formally involved future of our communities. The outsiders food instead of letting the server know it caught me with a whole with Hopes. Instead, I was the writer/re- are being welcomed in. was not what I ordered. When I have had porter who covered Hagerstown Hopes Only one year later, the community we guests or customers or managers feel the bag of Doritos in my and their work with the community. I was are a part of and the community we call need to speak to me in a scolding manner, also hungry to get involved. I had a degree home are in a better place. Our resourc- I usually shut down. I fumble in my words, room before dinner.” in social work I wasn’t using, and somehow es have grown, opportunities have opened my shoulders slump. I am six years old just seeing that a small group of dedicat- up, and we’ve accomplished more than again and my mother just caught me with gentleman learned to not use hospitality ed and concerned citizens had been able many (sometimes including ourselves) a whole bag of Doritos in my room before workers as a punching bag for his emo- to acquire and sustain its own space for have thought possible. The community is dinner. tions. As someone who has 35 years to the LGBTQ community made me realize here, and we hope you’ll be a part of it. t But not today. Today I stood there, go before thinking about retirement, that that there was real potential here. Maybe holding the luggage cart I had brought for alone puts a smile on my face. t

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 25 out in the valley

parent children with severe mental illness. If you think your child has mental illness found people who were willing to listen to Many struggle to maintain relationships and/or behavioral issues, don’t hesitate to what we had to say and not just dismiss us with their children. The behaviors are a reach out and find someone to help you and our experiences. This time, we found challenge to endure. There are some- navigate these difficult waters. If the first an innovative treatment that worked. Parenting times violent words or ac- professionals don’t seem Michael still has a serious mental health He’s OUTloud tions. I have heard more to understand, then talk disorder. Michael still has to have round- worth it Rev. Kelly Crenshaw parents say they want to to another and another the-clock supervision. But, he is calmer. walk away than not. And, until you find someone He no longer attacks people for no reason. it breaks my heart. Would who makes headway He no longer bites himself and leaves an- they walk away from a with you and your child. gry wounds. He rarely bangs his head on Can You Just child with cancer? Or pa- Not every therapist or the concrete floor. He is a changed person. ralysis? Or brain damage? doctor or psychologist or We’re encouraged to see a brighter I don’t think so. whomever can work with future for Michael. We’re hoping he can Walk Away? Our society has made every single family. It’s graduate to a group home facility that will it easier to walk away from about finding that right allow him to have aspects of a normal life Today I went to the hospital where our son people we deem difficult match. again. We’re excited that he no longer de- Michael lives. He’s in his mid-20s. We ad- or abusive. If a friend is Michael has received sires to hurt people who bother him. We’re opted him as a teen, but he’s been in our in an abusive relationship, therapeutic help his entire over the moon that we can see the sweet lives much longer. Michael has a long his- we advise them to run life – at least since the age young man inside – the one we always tory of institutional living. He struggles with away and don’t look back. of three or four. He made knew was there. severe mental health issues and has spent And, that is very practical no progress and, in fact, And, more than anything else, we’re more of his life in psychiatric hospitals than advice. But, what if the worsened as he got older. glad we never gave up on him. Unlike so not. For most of us, it would abuser is your We sent him to this psy- many, who reached the end of their ropes, be difficult. For Michael, it’s Children child? Can you chiatric facility as a last we didn’t reach the point where we had to familiar and comforting in just walk away? Can you see resort. We felt we’d run out of options. It’s walk away just to maintain our own sanity. many ways. with severe the child without seeing the a state hospital. We feared for the worst. We stuck it out and now, many years later, Parenting a child with abuse? Is there a way to man- And, we found healing. we’re getting our reward. We’re rewarded a serious illness, whether medical or age both? This time, we found a group of pro- with a young man who can finally show his medical or psychiatric, is So many people try to man- fessionals who understood. This time, we kind nature. It was worth the wait. t tough. And, in many cases, psychiatric age seriously mentally ill chil- the parenting responsibili- dren without professional inter- ty doesn’t disappear as the problems vention. They are embarrassed children become adults. In that their children are hard to Michael’s situation, I am his legal guardian handle. They are frustrated that the tech- ANDRE SHAKTI as well as his mother. For Michael, experts niques they try don’t always work. And, so predict that there will never be a time when many people love to shame those parents he can effectively make good decisions by claiming that love is more than enough about his life. He will always have a guard- to cure any child. But, would love cure ian to make decisions for him. cancer? Or paralysis? Or brain damage? I talk with hundreds of parents who I don’t think so. Sex, Intimacy and Relationship Coaching for Every Body

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26 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com Quality of life // did you know!? Maya Montana, What Should We Do?!

By Kevin Assam Miss Gay America 1998! Maya Montana has been impersonating I’m going in for my interview at a sea- females for 25 years as a performer start- soned nightclub. To be dressed in drag or ing in Baltimore. Here, she won Miss Gay not to be dressed in drag? Maryland Newcomer 1994, Miss Hippo I think you can show up either or but 1995, and Miss Gay Maryland 1996. She my advice is to not be in drag. Save that subsequently moved to Virginia winning for your performance audition. Give them a the title Miss Gay Virginia 1997 and ulti- chance to see the genius behind the mask. mately Miss Gay America 1998. Maya now The drag queens I work with have a resides in Key West as an entertainer at tendency to share certainty beauty tools Aqua Nightclub. Notorious for her elab- – lipstick, brushes, sponges. Is this a good orate peacock costume, let’s ruffle her idea in light of the measles outbreak? feathers and dive into her world I for some fanciful advice. Maya Kevin Assam: The hair Montana spray for my Tina Turner wig works fabulously but isn’t eco-friendly. What should I do? Maya Montana: Well that’s a conundrum. Tease that base! Teasing does not require hair- spray and you will get that bigger than life legendary Tina Turner hair! I’m racing for the first time in a heels-only race. Any advice on how not to face plant in my stilettos? Practice, practice, practice! And running around your neighborhood in pumps is a good exercise and a way to meet a potential new boyfriend. I’m tired of being expected to sew all my garments. Where are the best places to go hunting for cur- know sharing is caring but vaceous looks? not in this case, boo! Buy your own make- There are so many to choose from. The up! Make-up are your tools for your job best thing is online shopping! EBay, Ama- so you need to show up well equipped for zon, or Instagram. Yes! Even Instagram. work. Boosting empowerment and breaking the bonds Be resourceful and let your fingers do I’ve just been elected to a local state of homophobia, racism, and stigma in same the walking. You could look around at the office. What’s the most immediate issue curvy queens and ask them. Some queens that needs legislative or policy addressing gender-loving (SGL) men in Baltimore City sew for money so you could be support- in the drag community? • NETWORKING ing your sisters at the same time. There is Equality! I think television has exposed nothing like a one of a kind costume. a lot of people to drag and there is not as Every 1st Wednesday I’ve been asked to open for a marquee much discrimination. I feel that there is • HIV EDUCATION drag performer. The exposure could be more of an issue when it comes to trans- Every Last Wednesday life-changing. However, they’ve decided genders and their rights in our communi- to offer me peanuts for compensation. It’s ty. This is not something they do for four • SOCIAL EVENTS gonna cost a small fortune out of pocket. hours a night, three times a week. They Monthly Should I take the gig? live this life every single day. I would make • ART CREATION PROJECT Absolutely! We all have to start some- sure that no transgender is discriminated where so I did plenty of free small pay gigs against. One thing I love about Key West is [email protected] • 410-837-5573 in my early days. Some expenses came that its motto is “One human family,” which out of my own pocket. By doing that, it not is an excellent motto to live by. t FB: New Horizons Baltimore • aidsactionbaltimore.org only gave me exposure but I also gained HIV Prevention Advocacy for SGL Men's Health supported by experience. The experience helped me ViiV Healthcare's ACCELERATE! Program tremendously and I captured the title of BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 27 TheThe Quality of life your wedding day. Getting the 1) Be forward-looking, focusing on the love and devotion you will bring to your part- DrinkerDrinkeryy Wedding ner in your marriage. You Want 2) Traditional vows include a list of con- David Egan ditions under which you will continue to TheThe LittleLittle CoCorrnerner BarBar withwith aa GreatGreat BigBig HeHeartart!! love and support your partner. In essence, they say, “No matter what happens, I will be 205 West Read Street “Corner of Read and Park” there.” This is your opportunity to say the Eight Tips on same, in ways that are specific to your rela- 410-225-3100 • ATM Available tionship with your sweetheart. Writing Great 3) Don’t get hung up on making it the best prose or poetry ever, or on entertain- Wedding Vows ing your guests. What everyone wants to hear, and especially your beloved, is your “I, ___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded authentic desire to be present, to care, and husband / wife, to have and to hold, from this to be your best possible self. That will make BALTIMORE’S BEST day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, it great. for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love 4) Give yourself some time to craft what and to cherish, till death do us part, accord- could be the most important few sentences ing to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I you’ll ever write. Start three or four months pledge thee my faith [or] pledge myself to ahead of your wedding, and have it com- HAPPY HOUR you.” pletely finished a month ahead. One single sentence pledging a lifetime 5) Write from the heart. It doesn’t have of of love and devotion. What could be sim- to be long or fancy. A few good sentences pler! that express your love and intentions are all 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Your wedding vows are your promises that you need. A writer’s tip: if you’re having to each other of how you trouble getting started, start in will comport yourself the middle. The beginning will as a marital partner. reveal itself as you write. BESTBEST PRICESPRICES ININ TOWNTOWN The vows are gener- 6) Read it to yourself as ally composed of two you edit, polishing it until it says or three parts: an ex- what you want, in your own pression of your un- voice. Then practice saying it conditional love, your out loud. You want to be able intention to honor these to speak those words to your promises as long you about-to-be spouse clearly both are alive, and an and with ease, with every bit invocation of your spir- of the love you feel for them itual source to support coming through in your voice. you in your promises. 7) Write it all down. Make The wedding vows a pretty presentation copy to used by most of the hold in your hand. Have it with world’s organized reli- you, even if you plan to memorize your gions contain these core elements. Their vows. Your officiant will be happy to hold it origin is in the 16th century, about the same for you to keep it safe and looking good. time that the church decreed that weddings 8) Don’t worry about being heard by your be performed in public and by a priest and guests. Speak to your sweetheart. You can before witnesses. Prior to that, a marriage always repeat your vows during the recep- ceremony was simply a contract between tion or put them on the web. Conversely, us- families. Romantic marriage didn’t take off ing a lapel microphone or a wireless, hand- for another hundred years or so, A marriage held one will allow you to be heard while that upholds equal rights for both partners is keeping your attention on your partner. a 20th century innovation. Heartfelt vows, presented well, will be Interestingly, male bonding ceremonies remembered and held dear. They are words were performed in churches all over the that you will live by every day. Give them the Mediterranean up into the 1200s, sanctified loving thought, feeling, and attention that by priests with many of the same prayers your marriage deserves. t Look ahead for the and rituals used to join men and women in David L. Egan is the proprietor and stew- Look ahead for the marriage. ard of Chase Court, a wedding and event But I digress. venue in downtown Baltimore. Visit Cha- Here’s how to write great wedding vows secourt.com, and follow ChaseCourtWed- BackBack BarBar toto reopenreopen and how to offer them to your beloved on dingVenue on Instagram and Facebook. 28 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com DINING OUT

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BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 29 your money Strategies for Investing Cash

By Woody Derricks takers, investing money once a month for The stock markets are at all-time highs and three, six, or 12 months may be the ide- don’t appear to be ready to change course al fit. By investing over a period of time, any time soon. If you have a rollover from you’re dollar cost averaging the money into an old 401k or some saved cash, you may the market. This allows you to get some be asking yourself if this is the right time to money in right away if the market goes up invest that money. You may want to have and to allow you to buy into the market if it your money invested right away so that goes down over a period of time. you don’t miss the potential upside of the While this strategy doesn’t fully protect market or you may want to wait on some or you from a market decline, it might soften all of your investing for fear that the market the impact versus investing it all at once. It may pull back. When clients come to me also limits your upside should the market with cash to invest, I typically offer them continue going up from day one. three options: invest the money all at once, Hold off for now – For market timers, invest over a period of time, or hold off and holding off for the time being and waiting invest later. Each option has its pros and for a market decline to invest the funds is cons and should be evaluated to determine also an option. Market timers are hoping which is most appropriate for you. that they are correct in projecting a mar- Invest the money all at once – This ket decline and that they’re able to buy at strategy is akin to jumping into a pool and or near the market bottom. This strategy doesn’t work for everyone. I find that in- might provide some downside protection, vesting all of the money at once works but might miss out on potential gains prior better for people who have a rollover from to a market drop and relies heavily on the their 401k or other employer retirement investor to accurately time the market bot- plan. The reason for this is that the money tom. Doing this may lead to missing any was already invested and has only been potential upside and buying in at a high- out of the market for a brief period of time. er price than where the market currently This is simply reinvesting the proceeds. stands. This strategy also potentially works for None of these strategies assures gain clients with higher risk tolerances. They or protection from loss. Each has its advan- are more inclined to not want to miss any tages and risks and should be weighed in opportunities in the market and are willing coordination with your overall investment to accept some short-term losses should objective with your financial professional. the market pull back. You may even find that a combination of The advantage of this is investing all these strategies is ideal for you. of your money with the potential to see it Dollar cost averaging involves continu- all rise over time. The obvious disadvan- ous investment in securities regardless of tage is that the market could pull back and fluctuation in price levels of such securi- you could see immediate losses in your ties. Investors should consider their ability account. to continue purchasing through fluctuating Invest the money over a period of price levels. Such a plan does not assure a time – This strategy is akin to gradually profit and does not protect against loss in walking into a pool. For people with excess declining markets. t cash or clients who are more moderate risk

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employees are guilty of creating a toxic work The More you environment by acquiescing to the dominant Know About “bullies,” promoting rumors and gossip, and COMMERCIAL/Federal a culture of blaming. Interestingly, the same Hill. 2,100+ sf office/ Business employees that are creating this toxicity are retail above grade, top waiting for the manager to do something to fix quality renovation. Your Richard Finger business needs a home! things. The manager has responded by com- Offered at $769,000! plaining about the dynamic and noxious behavior of the team, but does not take a stand, www.charmcityrealestate.com What Kind of to demand that it cease. By the manager, or 410-467-8950 (direct) the employees themselves, doing nothing, Manager Are You? this team has experienced low engagement, inconsistent teamwork, and steady turnover. The team does not value their relationship AVAILABLE FOR RENT! I’ve had occasion to watch managers in with this manager, and feels the manager is action over my career. I think we can all uninvolved. Charles St. – 2nd Floor agree that managers display many differ- In the case of the overly-active manag- ent styles, from completely hands-off to er, this manager seems to react to each and overly involved, and somewhere in be- every situation that arises. This manager has Newly renovated, 2BR/1BA, all new tween. What is most interesting for me as a commanding and controlling management an HR practitioner is to monitor the impact style: managers order, employees obey. Dis- appliances, includes heat & water. the varying styles have on employees. obedient employees are punished. I’ve heard Walking distance to MICA, UB, Light When I say “management style,” I’m many times claims of insubordination and referring to the way a manager makes de- seen many times warning letters written with- Rail, Penn Station & Baltimore Eagle. cisions relating to their subordinates. The out due process. These managers tend to be $795/mo plus security deposit. wrong management style demotivates em- less candid and trusting; creating an environ- ployees, kills productivity, and causes em- ment of fear, un- certainty, and doubt. 866-474-7000 ployees to disengage Fear, guilt, and and leave. shame are tools to One successful scare the team into management style is compliance. There known as the “demo- are many examples cratic” manager. These of emails blasted managers are high in out to the entire openness, have a great team after one team degree of intellectual member makes a curiosity, preferring a mistake. Many ex- diversity of ideas. They amples of explosive are imaginative, and conversations in the open to feedback and heat of the moment ideas from their team. that hours later end One way to measure im- up in remorse and pact is through the an- ‘Democratic’ managers apology. Not only nual employee engage- rank high in openness do the team supervisors ment survey. Generally speaking, and welcome feedback not trust this leader, they good managers seem to yield the and ideas from their do not trust each other. best results; employees enjoy the team The line staff see, hear, relationship they have with their im- and feel what is happen- mediate manager, feel their manager coming but are fearful to speak up. Unfortunate- municates well, fosters teamwork, and chal- ly, for this team, the manager feels a need to lenges them appropriately. Most importantly, do something all the time. Often times, these these employees are less likely to leave the knee-jerk actions are the wrong ones, result- organization. Likely, the democratic manag- ing in low team morale and very high turnover er will see these positive results. rates that are off the charts. When I set out to write this article, the It was in conversation with another col- premise was to highlight how the hands-off league that led me to the realization that manager and the overly-active manager managers that do nothing are just as bad seem to produce the same result. In one as those that do too much of the wrong case, the hands-off manager lacks account- things. In reviewing key indicators of high ability for the behavior from the team. You performing teams, managers that skew might call this the “seagull” manager, only towards the democratic style are seeing choosing to become involved when things better productivity, better retention, and go wrong. Under this management style, the overall better results. t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD MAY 10, 2019 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 31 leather

while wearing an outfit that included a large inflatable penis. ShipMate President Jahleel presented a small token of appreciation to Rik Newton-Treadway and announced that - Baltimore Leather the ShipMates had voted for his club Hooker Line & Boys as club of the year for their continued Resur of the Rodney Burger support of the ShipMates. David Sugar took Eagle great pride in reading for the crowd a Gover- rection nor’s Citation signed by Maryland Governor Larry Hogan which congratulated the Ship- By Rodney Burger Mates for their many years of community On Easter Weekend the long dormant Baltimore Eagle located at 2022 North service. After the party many in attendance Charles Street reopened to the delight of many in the Baltimore LGBT communi- ShipMates went on to Leon’s bar for the sendoff party. Invitations went out to members of many leather clubs in the area for a private ty and fundraiser for Mr. Maryland Leather re-opening reception on Thursday, April 18th with food and open bar from 7 to 11 Celebrate 45 2019 Scorpius Red who will be traveling to pm. The party brought members of Centaur MC, ShipMates Club of Baltimore, Chicago over the Memorial Day Weekend to FIST, Hooker & Boys, ONYX, as well past and present leather titleholders, includ- Years of Service represent Maryland at the International Mr. ing the very first female Eagle bar titleholder Ms. Baltimore Eagle 1992 Glenda Leather 2019 contest. Rider. Everyone was warmly greeted by the new staff and management. Founded in 1974 at the Gallery Bar in On Good Friday, April 19th at 7 pm a line gathered at The ShipMates Club of Baltimore, Mary- Baltimore, the ShipMates continued to not the door as the popu- land’s first leather club, toasted 45 years of only celebrate the fun and camaraderie that lar bar reopened service to the community with a cocktail par- is the leather community, but they have also to the public with ty on Saturday, May 4th at Max’s Taphouse raised funds for many local charities. Their the theme: “The in Baltimore’s historic Fells Point neighbor- biggest fundraiser is their annual Daddy Rise.” At a time hood. It was an evening that will go down Christmas event held traditionally on the first when many LGBT in leather history as longtime members of Saturday of December. This year’s Daddy spaces are clos- many Mid-Atlantic leather clubs as well as Christmas will benefit CHANA, a Baltimore ing, it was great to current leather titleholders joined in the cel- based nonprofit that helps persons who ex- see the Baltimore ebration. perience physical, psychological, sexual, Eagle reopen. The three-hour party – which was or financial abuse. The ShipMates’ Daddy There is no cover chaired by ShipMate member David Sugar Christmas 2019 will be held on the evening for the main floor, – not only included lots of food and drink, of Saturday, December 7th at the Baltimore which also includes Baltimore Eagle but there was also a parade of leather club Eagle and will include a silent auction, pic- a larger Code Bar. The new man- arises anew – colors, a swearing in of the new ShipMates’ tures with Santa, a raffle for a wagon of agement promises “a welcoming environment to everyone Maybe its mascot executive board as they gripped a wood- booze, and more. A kickoff to Daddy Christ- while maintaining the needed space for our leather com- should be the en ship’s wheel (in keeping with tradition), mas called: “Ho Ho in the Heat” is sched- munity.” The bar jumped right in with drag shows upstairs phoenix! and entertainment provided by Baltimore’s uled for Saturday, July 13th at Mixer’s bar. featuring many of Baltimore’s popular performers and held Queen of Comedy Shawnna Alexander. Next up for the ShipMates is a bar night at a “Resurrection Tea Day” on Easter Sunday. Shawnna was particularly hilarious when she the Baltimore Eagle on Saturday, May 18th On Monday to Wednesday, the Baltimore Eagle has a happy hour from 4 to 7 performed “Don’t Want No Short Dick Man” starting at 9:30 pm. You pm, with $1 domestic bottle beers and from 7 to 10 pm, $3 rail drinks, $5 pitchers can follow the ShipMates of draft, and other specials. All with no cover! Many additional shows, karaoke and learn more about nights, dances, drink specials, and leather club events are planned. Visit Balti- their coming events by moreeagle.com or their Facebook page at “Baltimore Eagle Night Club and Bar” liking their Facebook for more information. The Baltimore Eagle has risen again. Hallelujah! t page: The Baltimore ShipMates. As readers of this column know, I joined the ShipMates in 1997 and the club has brought me many years of enjoyment as I have Hearts and Ears Inc. made countless friends LGBTQIA+ Wellness & Recovery Center and have traveled the country attending leather events. The ShipMates Hearts & Ears, Inc. is a non-profit organization for Gay, are always looking for Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex and new members. Find out what has been keeping Questioning, and Gender Non-Conforming individuals the ShipMates afloat for with behavioral health issues and concerns. 45 years. Come join the

ShipMates – 611 Park Avenue Suite A, Baltimore, Maryland 21201 • 410-523-1694 Celebrating almost half a century [email protected] • heartsandears.org

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Wills & Trusts Professional Powers of Attorney Woody Derricks, CFP® [email protected] Service • Advance Medical Directives • Probate & Trust Administration Directory. For • Prenuptial Agreements 2809 Boston Street • Suite 509 more information Baltimore, MD 21224 • Contact Mary at 500 E. Pratt Street, Suite 900, Baltimore (410) 732-2633 partnershipwm.com 410-802-1310 facebook.com/partnershipwm (410) 332-8626 • [email protected] COUNSELING SALON Phil Pecoraro Dr. Janan Broadbent LCSW-C, DCSW Specializing in Relationships FOR RENT Therapy and LGBTQ Concerns AFFORDABLE BOOTH Psychotherapy “The greatest stock market you located in TO A BARBER, can invest is yourself. Finding this Mt. Vernon BRAIDER, truth is better than finding a gold 1 E. Chase (The Belvedere) OR NAIL TECH mine.” – Byron Katie Office: 410-327-6892 Pam's Comfort Zone Cell: 410-370-6724 To Schedule an appointment 2800 Greenmount Ave. Visit drjanan.org Waverly Area philippecoraro.com Or call 410-825-5577 For more info: 410-814-8649

Bar 704 ASBURY PARK, NEW JERSEY 704 N 3rd Street Georgies Bar Harrisburg, PA 812 5th Avenue 717-234-4228 Asbury Park NJ 07712 BALTIMORE, MARYLAND 732-988-1220 Station North Arts Cafe Gallery The Brownstone Lounge Club 1722 1816 North Charles Street 412 Forester Street Paradise 1722 North Charles Street 410-625-6440 • stationnortharts.com Harrisburg, PA 17102 10 Asbury Avenue 410-727-7431 • club1722.com SteamPunk Alley 717-234-7009 Asbury Park, NJ 07712 732-988-6663 Club Bunns 227 W. Chase Street • 410-539-4806 REHOBOTH BEACH, DELAWARE 608 W. Lexington Street • 410-234-2866 The Rowan Tree Blue Moon The Asbury Drinkery 1633 South Charles Street 35 Baltimore Avenue 210 5th Avenue 203-207 W, Read Street • 410-225-3100 410-468-0550 • therowantree.net Rehoboth Beach, DE Asbury Park, NJ 07712 302-227-6515 • bluemoonrehoboth.com Hotel Tides The Eagle MARYLAND 408 7th Avenue 2022 North Charles Street The Lodge Lounge & Dance Club The Purple Parrot Asbury Park, NJ 07712 410-200-9858 • thebaltimoreeagle.com 21614 National Pike 247 Rehoboth Avenue Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 • 302-226-1139 732-897-7744 The Gallery Boonsboro, MD 21713 1735 Maryland Avenue • 410-539-6965 301-591-4434 Rigby’s Bar & Grill 404 Rehoboth Avenue Grand Central HARRISBURG, PENNSYLVANIA Rehoboth Beach, DE 1001-1003 North Charles Street Stallions 302-227-6080 • rigbysbarandgrill.com 410-752-7133 • centralstationpub.com 706 N 3rd Street Iguana Grill Leon’s Harrisburg, PA 717-232-3060 • stallionsclub.com 52 Baltimore Avenue 870 Park Avenue • 410-539-4993 Rehoboth Beach, DE 19971 Mixer’s 302-227-0948 • iguanagrill.com 6037 Belair Road • 410-599-1952

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CLIENT COMCAST FILE NAME: CMCIN18016M20_9.875x9.6_BaltimoreOUTLoud_v02.indd APPROVAL JOB NUMBER CMCIN18016M20 DESCRIPTION: DIV031-Q4-NED-A10-V1 BILL TO NUMBER CMCIN18016 COLORS: CMYK PROOFREADER GRAPHIC ARTIST Johnny Villalobos NOTES: NONE STUDIO DIRECTOR DATE 9-26-2018 11:55 AM FONTS: XFINITY Standard TT (Italic, Bold Italic, Light, Bold, Regular) TRAFFIC REVISION 2 IMAGES: 41668_GettyImages-852949206_Clutch.jpg (CMYK; 493 ppi; 60.76%), PAGE 1 CMCIN18016_Tablet_v01.psd (CMYK; 975 ppi; 7.38%), Comcast_S_4C_GRAY.eps PRODUCTION PUB Baltimore OUTLoud (9.38%), Pride_2018_CMYK.ai (29.79%) ART DIRECTOR BLEED None COPYWRITER TRIM 9.875” x 9.6” LIVE 9.375” x 9.1” ASSOC CREATIVE DIR SCALE 100% CREATIVE DIRECTOR PRINTOUT 100%

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