Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn • Page 1435 © 2008 Kwan Um School of Zen •
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701 October 29, 1977 Dear Seung Sahn Soen Sa Nim, At last, I finally sit down to tell you of my recent decision. I have decided to resign as Housemaster of Tahl Mah Sah, which also means that, if the big house is the Center’s new home, that I will not be living there. I told See Hoy the other day, and I think he thinks I’m not making the “right” decision. And, to tell the truth, that day, I didn’t know if it would be best for me, either. I felt miserable staying with the Center, and felt miserable about leaving. Very frustrating, to say the least. Anyhow, I’ve decided to try keeping a clear mind and to sit on my own, as we all have to do eventually, anyway, in or out of the Center. I was talking with my guitar teacher today, and he was telling me that, when he was younger, he spent three years studying to be a Greek Orthodox priest. But, he left and did not finish the training, which is seven years. I asked him how he felt when he left, and why he left, and he said he left because he had a lot of energy inside him, and the peace and quiet became too peaceful and quiet. When he left, he knew it was okay for him to do it. But, he also said that those three years were time well spent, and have never really left him. This is not exactly my situation, but, although at times, I get incredibly pissed with you for having so many rules and set ways for doing things, I am very thankful to you for having encouraged me to stay and see through those other two times when I thought I “just couldn’t stay.” And also thankful to you for being so simply clear in your teachings. I really have no idea where this decision will take me, but I’m sure I’ll see you again, sometime. See Hoy told me that when he first knew you, you totally ignored him, and that once, when he came to you to learn calligraphy, you made him wait for hours, and still didn’t teach him. He said he went home and understood what it was you were trying to teach him: patience… Because, without patience, you can’t do anything well. Was that the lesson? Is that the lesson? Have a good stay on the East Coast. Take care, and good bye, Alicia November 10, 1977 Dear Alicia, Thank you for your letter. How are you? Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn • Page 1435 © 2008 Kwan Um School of Zen • www.kwanumzen.org What are you doing now? You said, “I have decided to resign as Housemaster of Tahl Mah Sah.” Not good, not bad. Not coming to Tahl Mah Sah and not being Housemaster is not so important. What is most important? I often have told you, nobody guarantees your life. After one hour, tomorrow, after one month, after one year, you don’t know when your body will disappear. Your body has many desires. Your body has six bad robbers. Eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body, mind. Always, those six robbers don’t have enough. If you have a good situation, they want a better situation. But, if you have a bad situation, those six robbers don’t like this at all, and the six robbers tell you, “I don’t like this! I cannot try this!” Then, your true self, not being strong, only follows your six robbers. Then, anytime, you have not enough mind, and also are sometimes very confused, and then, you have already lost your center. If your center is strong, those six robbers can have many desires, anger, and ignorance, but your center doesn’t move. Then, your daily life is correct. Also very clear, no problem. You said to me that I have many rules, many set ways of doing things. But somebody said, “Soen Sa Nim is not special. He is teaching nothing.” Your speech is different, which means you have too strong opinions, too much understanding, and too much checking your feelings. So, you need many rules; many set ways of doing things is very important. If, moment to moment, you keep your correct situation, then my many rules and many set ways are not necessary. Many rules, many set ways are only for you. Maybe your six robbers don’t like this. But, your true self likes this very much. Which one do you like? I understand your mind. I told you before, you must put down your condition, your situation, your opinion. If you cannot put down your condition, situation, your opinion, then if you stay outside the Zen Center, anyplace, you will have a problem. But, if you put down your condition, your situation, your opinion, then if you keep on being Housemaster and stay at the Zen Center, even if you go to a demon’s place, you will have no problem. So, I tell you, a bad situation is a good situation. A good situation is a bad situation. But, you don’t like bad situations; you want a good situation. That is very bad. In a good situation, you can lose your true way and your center very easily. But, in a bad situation, you understand your karma, so you want to make your bad karma disappear. So, if you try, try, try this way, making a good situation and finding the way is very easy. So, again I ask you, what is most important? Situation, feeling, staying, going, location are not important. What are you doing now? How do you keep your just-now mind? Moment to moment, where are you going? What are you? If you don’t know, only go straight—don’t know. Put down your opinions. Don’t make anything. Don’t check your feelings; don’t check your thinking. Only go straight—don’t know. Then, you will get everything, O.K.? Maybe one week rest is necessary. Then, next week you must go to the Zen Center. If you don’t like Tahl Mah Sah, any Zen Center is O.K. You must try. I like you, so don’t lose your true way. What do you want? If you want something, you must fight and try to get it. But, if you already have enough, fighting is not necessary, and trying is also not necessary. You can see; you can hear; all, just like this, is truth. Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn • Page 1436 © 2008 Kwan Um School of Zen • www.kwanumzen.org I hope you always keep a mind which is clear like space, always control your six robbers, soon find your original face, get Enlightenment, and save all people from suffering. Yours in the Dharma, S.S. Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn • Page 1437 © 2008 Kwan Um School of Zen • www.kwanumzen.org 702 November 2, 1977 Dear Soen Sa Nim, Here is a simple Buddha, from simple mind to simple mind. You, I consider, were the first REAL TEACHER I have met in this LIFETIME. Intermittently, I share the joy of DHARMA with you. Zen is basically formless, yet, the handle which forms, we call ZEN. The golden thread of this tradition also passed through the hands of the West, invisibly. Some call it the Self, remembering. As a gift to you and your students, three public meetings will occur in New York and Boston. Please phone me at these numbers. Respectively, Sim Seon November 10, 1977 Dear Sim Seon, Peter, Thank you for your beautiful card and your letter, and for the invitation. How are you? You said from simple mind to simple mind. Those are wonderful words. Zen is complicated mind becoming simple mind. But, what is simple mind? Tell me! Tell me! And, you said, “Zen is basically formless, yet the handle which forms, we call Zen.” You understand better than I. You already understand Zen handle. I will never understand Zen handle. Maybe you can teach me about Zen handle; then, I can use Zen handle and save all people. But, before I can understand Zen handle, first, I ask you: What is Zen? If you open your mouth, I will hit you thirty times. If you close your mouth, I will hit you thirty times. What can you do? Understanding cannot help you. If you want to understand Zen, throwing away your understanding is very necessary. If you don’t understand, only go straight—don’t know. Don’t check your feelings; don’t check your mind; don’t check your understanding. Next, you invited me. Thank you very much. But, you only gave the telephone number. What? Where? How? Who? Why? When? Zen is, moment to moment, keeping your correct situation and keeping clear mind. So, when you invite someone, you must give those six pieces of information. Then, everything is clear. Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn • Page 1438 © 2008 Kwan Um School of Zen • www.kwanumzen.org I hope you always go straight, keeping a mind which is clear like space, soon finish the Great Work of life and death, get Enlightenment, and save all people from suffering. Yours in the Dharma, S.S. Teaching Letters of Zen Master Seung Sahn • Page 1439 © 2008 Kwan Um School of Zen • www.kwanumzen.org 703 November 4, 1977 Dear Soen Sa Nim, Thank you so much for the interview yesterday. Before I came to you, I was thinking I was walking towards heaven; being with you was like hitting a brick wall—now, I see I was only walking further into hell—you put a wall on BOTH sides.