The Lightning Bolt “Bringing the Thunder to Chancellor since 1988”

Chancellor High School 6300 Harrision Road, Fredericksburg VA 22407

Volume 28 April/May Issue 7 2016

1 April 2016 Big Fish On May 5th, 6th and 7th Chancellor High School’s Drama Department will perform “Big Fish” a musical, in Chancellor’s auditorium. Tickets are ten dollars and anyone can attend. This is a show everyone can enjoy!

Photos courtesy of Matthew Armentrout April 2016 2 News prepare yourselves. Junior year ing slang. They keep the classes Editorial can be one of the most stress- pretty lively and interesting, ful years for students because contradicting their first day syl- Follow us on of preparing for senior year. I labus spiels which seem to go on recommend using every chance for hours. instagram you have to get priorities taken Chancellor will be losing our Mrs. Gattie @CHHS_TLB_ care of and remember to still seniors, but we will be gain- Adviser have fun. To all rising sopho- ing many students and we are By Ashley Ragonese mores, you’ve made it past your all excited to welcome you, and Editor-in-Chief Elect freshman year and you have sad to be saying goodbye to our ashley ragonese As we approach the end of an- Editor-in-Chief Elect other school year, we begin to learned a lot about Chancellor. seniors. The senior members of forget the sound of school bells Remember to take time to really The Lightning Bolt Newspaper and revisit the sounds of sum- get to know yourself, and find have written their senior fare- myah hidalgo mer. Seniors will be graduating who you truly are now that all wells which can be found in Co-Editor-in-Chief Elect and going to college or pursu- your freshman fears have been the Features section. Since the ing other life paths after their conquered. Last, but certainly seniors, Matt Sanders, Jordan summer vacation. Some of us, not least, rising freshman - you Pearson, Rachel Thompson, raelyn slaughter have a big year ahead of you,. Laura Sullivan, and Kaitlyn such as myself are approach- Layout Editor Elect ing our senior year. What I have There are many things you’re O’Gorman will be leaving us learned most from Chancellor’s probably worried about like get- we have chosen our new edi- beloved seniors is that time goes ting lost in Chancellor’s campus, tors. Sports editor will be Emma makayla tardie by very quickly. I would like to but in reality our students and Haus, Op-Ed will be edited by tell my fellow rising seniors to teachers are very kind and will Lily Church, Features by Tyler News Editor Elect take risks, go the extra mile to help you find your way. Don’t Jacobs and Talon Torres, News make every experience a posi- worry about making friends, will be edited by Makayla Tar- tive one, and make it a year you it’ll be easy. Lastly the classes, die. Our Co-editor will by Myah emma haus will always remember and find most of the teachers here are Hidalgo, and I will be your new Sports Editor Elect impossible to forget. For those pretty “hip” to our social media Editor-in-Chief. approaching your junior year, crazes, and continuously evolv- tyler jacobs Features Editor Contents talon torres Features Editor News: Retirements ...... pg 4 Sports: Updates ...... pg 7 lilly church Op-Ed Editor Op-ed: Digging Deep...... pg 10 Features: Senior Farewells ...... pg 13 mary-cate Special Section: The New Yolk Times ...... pg 21 mosher Website Editor on the cover The Journalism students at Chancellor High School publish The Light- ning Bolt, the only official newspaper on campus. The purpose of the Edward Bloom, portrayed by Brandon newspaper is to factually inform and entertain its readers. As an estab- lished open forum for the student body, truth will be the staff’s major goal. It is the responsibility of each staffer to adhere to the journalism Bolick, is famous for his tall tales that he code of ethics as set by the Society of Professional Journalists, Sigma Delta Chi. The code states that a journalist can not accept gifts, favors or privileges that could compromise their integrity. All material published will be the result of brainstorm sessions by the staff. Subjects stimulat- shares with his son, Will. ing to the majority of the student body will be used. The editorial board, which is comprised of all newspaper staff members will determine the priority of the stories and the overall design of publication. The advi- This musical is told in sor serves to give students a better understanding of the functions and ethics of a free press. The advisor does not serve as a censure. Student editors will decide the material to be published. In accordance with com- munity standards, profanity will not appear in the publication. Students flashbacks as well as in present day. are free to express an opinion on matters of public interests under the, “fair comment rule.” Under this rule, the student has the right to intel- ligently criticize the school and its policies. Editorials reflect the opinion This fun, humorous, and tearful of The Lightning Bolt. Opinion stories reflect the opinion of the writer and do not represent the opinion of the faculty and administration of Chancellor High School. Controversial issues will be covered from both points of view. School news, as well as local, national and international production will steal the hearts of events will also be covered. Letters to the editor are welcomed. All let- ters must be signed and be between 200- 300 words long. They may be submitted to A113 or by e-mailing [email protected]. The its audience. Lightning Bolt retains the right to edit letters to comply with journalistic standards. Anonymous letters will not be published. This is your school, help improve it through your opinions, praises, and constructive criti- cisms. If voiced aloud and in large enough numbers, we can bring about change. Our ultimate goal is to print the truth and with your help we can reach this goal. News 3 April 2016 News Section Kenneth Ryan: Not Being Generic By Tyler Jacobs Features Editor Elect timeline follows the school year, his camera. He also inputs the movies and started to come up “I think for a film to stand showing the harmful effects weird things in life that people with stuff on the spot and film out and stand the test of time, that the medication causes. don’t pick up on. Like when it,” Ryan stated, commenting on it has to have substance. It has “Just seeing all the kids at you’re in the classroom and you his lack of experience in film- to mean something and it has to school. When you read the hear weird things in the hall- making. “Just do it. Because a lot teach people something. And of symptoms of ADD, it’s just de- way, like films don’t put that of film professors say the way course I’d love to be big and be scribing a child. It’s just describ- stuff in there and yet he always to learn film is to make film and able to make huge, huge mov- ing a normal kid, oh they’re hav- finds ways to put the little weird watch film.” ies but something I want most ing trouble paying attention. No things in there. Because I think Due to the success of Generic out of filmmaking in my dreams duh! It’s a kid with a lot of ener- people are weird in nature.” Fate, Ryan has been receiving and aspirations is to continue gy, they’re going to be bouncing Boyle has directed films such offers from Columbia Holly- to make films and continue to around. Some kids can control as Slumdog Millionaire (2008), wood College and is also being teach people,” said Kenneth it, some can’t,” Ryan explained Trainspotting (1996), 127 Hours offered paid internships at Uni- Ryan, a senior at Chancellor when questioned about the in- (2010), and 28 Days Later (2002). versal Studios, 21st Century Fox, High School. spiration behind Generic Fate. “I love David Fincher as well,” and Dreamworks. Ryan is a Drama IV student “And just the fact that is creat- Ryan stated, explaining which “I think [Generic Fate] is a in Mr.Armentrout’s class. Last ing generations of drug addicts.” director inspired his style and good example of a coming of year he began a secret project ti- Generic Fate, which Ryan di- beliefs in film. “I kind of base age story, about high school tled Generic Fate with his writer rected, has been purchased by my idea of film of what he thinks student, and about something Ethan Harmin and several other distributors who plan on dis- is pretty prominent and that is pretty relevant to teenagers,” students at Chancellor as well tributing the film around the that people are perverts. I think Ryan explained why Generic as other schools as the cast. The world. that if you know how perverted Fate would interest Chancellor film centers around a young “I love Danny Boyle,” Ryan people are and what they want High School. “We’re all being high schooler named Alistair commented on one of his fa- to see, then you’ll make a film told we’re insane when we’re all who is put on ADD medication vorite film directors, Danny that people want to see.” pretty normal. I think it would during his freshman year. The Boyle. “I love the way he moves “I started to watch a lot of spark some interest.” 17 Years A Secretary By Lilly Church Op-Ed Editor Elect being secretary here for a sub- Chancellor. He has worked with bers how staff members worked stitute position that was only Przepiora for years, and knows together to buy a driver’s license supposed to last four months, how supportive, professional, for a staff member who previ- Mrs. Przepiora is now retiring. and crucial to the school she is. ously couldn’t transport herself For Przepiora, now is just the “The individual who takes Mrs. to the school for work, and how right time to retire. Her mother Przepiora's place next year will students and teachers bonded is 92 and lives in New York, so have huge shoes to fill,”, he says, together to mourn over and she wants to spend time with “and I think we will only then gradually push through the loss her for more than just a day or get a true idea of all that she of Craig Garvey, a student who two here and there. She also does for us here at Chancellor.” was diagnosed with grade four plans to spend time watching When asked what her most Osteosarcoma and passed away her grandkids for a couple days memorable experiences at while attending Chancellor a a week. Przepiora is also on Chancellor were, Przepiora re- couple of years ago. the board for a couple different sponded with a smirk, “You “It’s stuff like that which I’ll businesses and hopes that will know, this is a hard one because remember, where they just go keep her busy. a lot of things I remember I can’t above and beyond and do what “Mrs. Przepioria is the glue say.” they need to do. In one word, the that holds the office together. However, after consideration, staff is awesome; I am in awe of On the few days a year that she responded, “My favor- all the amazing things they have “I liked it, and then I just she has to be out, it usually ite memory of Chancellor will done for both me and each oth- stayed,” stated Linda Przepiora, takes three of us to cover what be that the students and staff, er.” Chancellor High’s secretary, she does in the morning before they take care of each other. about her first job offer to work school even starts,” states Brian They have so many times where at Chancellor . After 17 years of Gebhardt, a Vice Principal at they’ve stepped up.” She remem-

April 2016 4 News NEWS Forensics team post-regionals Roche Retirement By Ashley Ragonese Editor-and-Chief Elect

“Rejoice at your life,” states ion Marketing in 1978, and later Ms.Kathryn Roche who will be graduated from Virginia Tech in retiring from the Chancellor 1986 with her Masters in Educa- family at the end of this school tion. She has graciously shared year. her knowledge with a diverse Twenty-eight years ago, Roche amount of Chancellor’s stu- joined the Chancellor family be- dents. coming an original settler. She When asked how the students started off teaching Funda- of Chancellor have impacted mentals of Marketing, Market- her life, Roche states, “I've en- ing and Advanced Marketing. joyed working with many stu- She states via e-mail that there dents over 28 years. It is always Photo Courtesy Mr. Armentrout were as few as 17 students in the nice to see graduates succeed in Forensics teamcelebrates with trophies after Regionals. first marketing class. Chancel- marketing.” She also states that lor’s students have noticeably she will miss sharing stories and grown towards marketing over experiences with the staff here Night on Broadway the years. whom she describes as a family. By Makayla Tardie Roche also teaches a Fash- After her retirement Roche News Editor Elect audience. ion Marketing class. She states plans to travel and spend some On Thursday, April 14th at “I know for my class we did that Fashion Marketing is her time relaxing. When asked what 7pm, Chancellor High School’s A Night on Broadway as part favorite class to teach because advice she would like to share choir and theatre departments of our Musical Theater unit,” it was the industry she first with Chancellor students and presented A Night on Broad- stated Zoe Garrick. “We always worked in before becoming a faculty, Roche says simply, “Re- way in the high school audito- like to be able to have an au- teacher. Roche graduated from joice at your life.” rium. dience for our performances.” James Madison University with The evening’s schedule fea- Garrick is a junior in Drama a Bachelor of Science in Fash- tured performances from III’s performance of Skid Row Chancellor’s Jazz Choir, Vo- cal Ensemble, Women’s Select, “We threw in some Men’s Select, Drama 3, and solos from Big Fish Drama IV. Some performances included Hard Knock Life from and Tilly so that we Annie by One Voice and Freak could give people a Flag from Shrek the Musical by Drama IV. Solos from this preview and get them year's musical Big Fish were pumped up for our presented by Ben Ransom, performances,” Brandon Bolick, and Sophie Horn. Everybody Loves my from Little Shop of Horrors. Tricks from Tilly The Trickster “We love to showcase all of was performed by the cast of our talent in our Arts Depart- the children’s musical. Chan- ment because we have so much cellor’s improv group Red Box of it!” created on-the-spot music “We threw in some solos numbers and skits based off from Big Fish and Tilly so that of words shouted out from the we could give people a preview and get them pumped up for “We always like to be our performances,” said Gar- able to have an rick on the topic of the solo previews. audience for our Piano accompaniment was by performances.” Patricia Martin. All Donations went towards supporting the Choir and Theatre programs. News 5 April 2016 NEWS Spotsylvania Budget Uproar Myah Hidalgo dent who spoke on behalf of the let us talk to taxpayers to hear are provided but that’s not what Co-Editor-in-Chief Elect Spotsylvania Women’s Conser- yes or no… they kind of limited we take home for our families,” vative Coalition, who responded our options.” states Slater. On February 23rd, a Spotsylva- with, “You shouldn’t be teaching As a teacher, Slater deals with As well in the poster, it was nia Board of Supervisors meet- if you don’t know anything.” this personally, and would love suggested that parents pay for ing was held in regards to the Here we have a case of a won- smaller classes and more teach- the schooling. “The fact is that school budget and the issues derful and deeply committed ers, but the budget often de- not all families can afford to pay that needed to be addressed. teacher fighting for her school’s ters new teachers from sticking for that, and sometimes it’s all In the meeting, Spotsylvania well being, only to be lashed at around. you can do to put food on the teachers and community mem- by someone doesn't see her side. Another problem that has af- table,” Slater states. bers were allowed to express “There is a contingent group fected teachers such as Slater’s However things are start- their concerns and give their of anti-taxpayers who are small has been the posters that were ing to look up for Spotsylvania opinion on the budget. It was but vocal that have made it clear passed out throughout the teachers. Recently, a proposed there, special education teacher they don’t want a tax raise, and county. Made by a local parent, budget was made by superin- Lori Clark stood up and refer- don’t want to advertise the tax the posters gave false informa- tendent Scott Baker. The budget enced her personal life. rate at anything above 84 cents., tion regarding teacher’s income includes millions of dollars in “I am not here as a teacher to states Mrs. Slater, one of Chan- and failed to give a fair compari- spending, a three percent raise ask for a raise, to be honest, I cellor’s economic teachers and son. for all employees and new addi- can’t even tell you what I make, SEA supporter. “They wouldn’t “In the posters, it was stated tional positions. I don’t care. My heart is for the even advertise it at .88, which that teachers make $70,000 a “I am very excited for things kids… I can’t even tell you what would have given us what we year, but that’s not the case. to come next year,” states Slater. my taxes are-” needed and allowed us to have That’s not our income; it's our “I think this has been a gradual Clark was interrupted by Dale a chance to have those powerful total amount including all the concern that has finally been Swanson, a Spotsylvania resi- conversations that would have benefits and insurance that we brought to light.” thanks to our loyal supporters! Tyler Jacobs Team Manuel Karate Nancy & Allen Kenny Captain C.A. Kenny Congratulations to the Students of the month April : Marianna Smith May: Eric Weiland

April 2016 6 News Sports Section Sport Updates Boys Soccer Baseball On The Road To States Looking Into the Future By David Stack year,” says Robert Bunting. The By David Stack Staff Reporter Staff Reporter Chancellor boys soccer team school baseball career,” states- Soccer is here! Soccer is one of Baseball season is well un- plans on going as far as they Mason Riser. those sports that can be trained derway, and there is a large can this season and would like Baseball is important to these hard and played even harder. It amount of support by family to make big accomplishments. players. Many of them want to is a competitive sport. and fans. The players are excit- Making it all the way would be play or are going to play in col- “Soccer is my life,” states Se- ed to play and are hoping that incredible not only for them, but lege. nior Austin Duke, “I have been they do well this season. for the whole school too. “I would love to play in col- playing it since I was little.” “The season is gonna be “The soccer team is as big as lege and go all the way to the Playing soccer is not easy. good,” states Nick Winston. “I’ve the football team, with all the MLB. But I do not know how There is a lot of training put in played for Chancellor for awhile support they get,” states Junior far I could really go,” states Matt to get good at the game and to and enjoy it a lot.“ Winston plays Thomas Shank. Morgan. understand the game of soccer. outfield. The varsity team can be seen Baseball is more than a game The boys varsity soccer team Chancellor is coming off of a at home against Caroline on for most of the players. It’s a is 6-2 so far this season and plan solid 2015 season that had ev- May 10th. lifestyle. So for some of the se- to only have two losses. erything put together for them niors who will be leaving the “This is my senior year and I in the playoffs. They advanced team next year, they will have to would like to go to States this all the way until their season try even harder to make it in col- ended. The Chargers are grate- lege. Chancellor is an exciting ful they made it so far. They team to watch. Many of the guys plan on going as far as they can make the game fun and exciting go this season including getting to watch. all the way to finals. Varsity baseball is home May “This is my senior year, and 10th against Caroline. if we make it to finals, it would be a great way to end my high Girls Soccer By Mary Cate Mosher “We all seem to have a very Website Manager Elect close bond this year which “Hard work and we’ll put one makes working together out in hundred and ten percent effort Photo courtesy of the Yearbook Staff into every game. We’ll leave ev- “Hard work and Senior Courtney Rhan sprints down the field to score a goal. erything we have on the field,” we’ll put one hundred states Ali Cook, a freshman and a starting player on the varsity and ten percent effort soccer team. into every game. We’ll The girls soccer has been put- leave everything we ting hard work into their prac- tices and it’s showing in their have on the field,” performances during games. So the field this year much easier,” far this season they are 7 and 3. states Savannah Cook. They are hoping to improve in The team has games coming their future games and only get up including: at Courtland on better from. May 3, James Monroe on May 6 “So far this year we have a at home, at Caroline on May 10, better record than we’ve had in King George on May 13 at home, previous years,” states Savan- and Spotsylvania on May 17 at nah Cook, a junior and member home. of the girls varsity soccer team. Photo courtesy of the Yearbook Staff The team has hopes of getting Sophmore Brianna Nassiri takes possesion of the ball. to states this year and improve from last year. 7 April 2016 Sports Sport UpDates continued Spring Track Softball Track Team Does Not Disappoint Chargers With A New System By Alex Keisling breaking records in both of them By Raelyn Slaughter potential, but also to the new Staff Reporter and and making national qualifica- Junior Features Editor players who had heart and were Emma Haus The softball team has been Sports Editor Elect tions on our SMR.” very coach-able. playing strong so far this sea- For those who love to run The girls 4 by 800 relay made “The team is hoping to im- son. With a current record of and get that runner’s high, you school history by qualifying for prove on buying into the sys- 4 - 5 and no injuries, the team should have joined the spring States within the very first race tem in each game that goes by,” is hoping to improve and keep track team this year. of the season. stated Coach Ritchie. “The team working hard. “The progress [we] track run- Senior, Tre Edmonds broke needs to improve on softball IQ. “This season I am hoping to ners make is because of both our the school record in the 3200 They need to be able to antici- bring a system to the team that own personal training, and the meter run at the Lee-Davis In- pate plays and pitches as they will get the most out of the play- help we get from the coaches,” vitational with a time of 9:50. happen so they can be better ers athletically, mentally, and states Mark-Lewis Ndikintum. Freshman, Ana Cox came in equipped to perform task.” scholastically,” stated Coach “Only we know how our bodies second place with a time of 5:39 Ritchie continued, “Louisa will Richie. “Winning or getting bet- work and how comfortable we in the 1600 run. The girls 4 by probably be one of the toughest ter in each game is our main fo- are running a certain way, but 400 meter relay came in a flash- teams we will play against, since cus right now.” the coaches and the other run- ing first place with an outstand- they have strong experienced Coach Richie, and the other ners help you to build the con- ing time of 4:04 and qualified for players.” The team is home May coaches of the team, looked for fidence to never give up, and to states. 4th and May 6th. last year’s players who had good always give it your all.” The track team’s next meets With about three weeks left are: Wednesday, May 11th is the of the season, the team does not home disappoint. Both the boys and Conference 19 Championship, girls teams have been rewarded Tuesday, May 19th at Caroline for their hard work and have High School, and the 4A State qualified for many events. Championship Meet is sched- “Our boys SMR (Sprint Med- uled to take place on Friday, ley Relay) and DMR (Distance June 3rd and Saturday, June 4th Medley Relay) did amazing,” at Harrisonburg High School. states Junior Noah Wise, “with Tennis committed, determined, successful By Matt Sanders “I believe that we have a pretty Senior Sports Editor good chance of getting to re- Photo courtesy of the Yearbook Saff “I think it’s going pretty well gional’s this year,” exclaimed The Lady Chargers congratulate eachother after a successful play this year,” stated senior Simon Kutenga. With it being the mid- Kutenga. With this year’s cam- point in the boy’s and girl’s ten- paign getting off to a good start nis teams, there is no guessing for the Chancellor High School as to how far they will go into Tennis Teams, the teams are their tournaments. “We have a looking forward to being suc- pretty good team this year,” stat- cessful in their pursuits to ed Kutenga. achieve great things. “I think ev- “You have to stay committed,” eryone has stepped up this year stated Kutenga. in commitment and effort,” stat- Though it is hard to see where ed Kutenga. There is no doubt the teams will place this year, that this year will be different there is no doubt that both for the boy’s and girl’s tennis teams will go far and achieve teams. Though there was a sur- their expectations if not exceed plus in talent that left last year, them. there are still talented athletes Photo by Savannah Roberts on the team as well as new tal- Chancellors Color Guard Team recieved 3rd place overall in their ent coming through the ranks. State Competition. April 2016 8 Sports Athlete Of The Month Name: Ana Cox proudly. However, Cox can do times refers to skateboarding more than just be a breath-hold- as her main transportation. Cox ing champion. With only run- also enjoys food and will listen Sport: Cross Coun- ning for two years as a freshman to anything but country mu- try, Winter and Spring qualified in the 4 by 800 meter sic. Cox is half Korean and can relay with teammates, Kara speak Korean fluently. Track Kreiling, Madalyn Amos and “I can use chopsticks,” Cox Hannah Nichols. By her senior states with pride. “I use them Grade: Freshman year, Cox hopes to improve a lot everyday.” Before she was into more, and go to States in an in- running, Cox also was involved dividual event. in gymnastics, swimming and Events: 1600 meter “The people,” Cox states sim- Taekwondo. run/ the mile and 4 by ply, when asked about her fa- Cox’s motivation to run comes 800 meter relay vorite thing about running. “We from the sense of knowing that have interesting adventures and the workout will will over soon. Photo By Emma Haus By Emma Haus “I was challenged to hold my conversations.” She also wants to impress her Junior Sports Editor breath for 45 seconds one day Outside of school, Cox en- coaches and get food, of course. and I did it,” states Ana Cox joys skateboarding and some- Chargers At A Glance

9 April 2016 op-ed section DIGGING DEEP What is the best feeling in the world? By Makayla Tardie News Editor Elect Jaime Ericson The best feeling in the world is freedom. Peo- ple at this age are really obsessed with it, but honestly it becomes very cumbersome follow- ing rules all the time and feeling locked down to something. Maybe freedom actually is just a change of pace, something broader. Either way, it seems that most people are looking forward to freedom, myself included. Like turning 18, or getting a car, or anything like that. It gives the illusion that you can do whatever you want, even if that’s not true. For many people, though, that’s enough. 10 Cloverfield Lane messes Photo by Makayla Tardie with minds By Raelyn Slaughter survive would be to live down Layout Editor Elect in the bunker for a few years. The movie 10 Cloverfield Lane Howard made a home out of the is a PG-13 mystery released on bunker with electricity, water, March 11 of this year. This near- and a few year’s supply of food. ly 2 hour movie was directed Michelle thought it was hard by Dan Trachtenburg and pro- to believe Howard, and con- duced by J.J Abrams and Bryan vinced the other roommate Em- Burk. It stars actors John Good- mett, who believed Howard at man, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, first, to believe that the man John Gallagher Jr. , Douglas Grif- was truly crazy and that they fin, and Suzanne Cryer. “...she got in a car ac- Cloverfield starts off with a young lady named Michelle who cident.” just broke up with her boyfriend. needed to get out of the bunker. While driving, she got in a car When she gets out of the bunker accident. When she awoke she she discovers the truth about discovered she was locked away the outside world. in a underground bunker with Cloverfield will definitely keep two men. Howard, the man who watchers on the edge of their created the bunker and the man seats and leave a big surprise at who so-called saved Michelle, the end to follow with hopefully told her she could not leave a new series. the bunker because a chemical outbreak had hit the earth. He told her the only way for her to Photo Source: http://www.10cloverfieldlane.com/

April 2016 10 Op-Ed Op-Ed Join the Club, Watch This Film Interstella 5555 Out of

By Tyler Jacobs world experience Features Editor Elect By Talon Torres Features Editor Elect improves and he proposes start- On February 26, 2001, the a concert, and sent to Earth. Dallas Buyers Club, a film di- ing a business surrounding the French House group Daft Punk When they reach Earth, they rected by Jean-Marc Vallee,is foreign medicines. released their second album are disguised as humans and are an Academy Award nominated Ron, alongside Rayon, a cross- titled Discovery. Unlike their brainwashed into performing film starring the talents of Mat- dresser also diagnosed with previous album, Homework, music to fulfill Darkwoode’s evil thew McConaughey, Jared Leto, AIDS and played by Jared Leto, Discovery was a concept album, plans. Meanwhile, the aliens and Jennifer Garner. The film opens the Dallas Buyers Club in send Shep, a lone pilot, to infil- takes place in Texas during the a motel and begins treating oth- “Unlike their previ- trate Earth and rescue the band, 1980s and follows the true story er people diagnosed with HIV. ous album, Home- who are now performing as the of character Ron Woodruff -af Ron’s path of self-preservation “Crescendolls”. It is up to Shep ter having been diagnosed with leads to a quest of helping other work, Discovery was to save the Crescendolls and re- HIV. people, doing what he can to a concept album...” turn home. Ron is not a man known for fight the system and get people Due to the lack of dialogue, making good choices, often the medication they need. Over with all of the tracks tying into Toei Animation showed char- engaging in criminal activity the course of the film, Ron over- one large story. The album was acter interaction by putting em- and dabbling with illegal sub- comes his homophobia, addic- praised by many, and went on phasis on body language and fa- stances. When he arrives home tions, and generally becomes a to sell over 2.6 million copies cial expressions. The animation after scamming some men out more caring man. It is revealed worldwide. Soon after, on May also relied on the soundtrack, of their money at a rodeo, he in the credits that Ron survived 28, 2003, the sci-fi animated with each track of Discovery set- nine years after his original di- film Interstella 5555: The 5tory ting the mood of the scene . For “Dallas Buyers Club agnoses without using the FDA of the 5ecret 5tar 5ystem was example, if the music had a fast is a beautifully direct- approved medicine. released (Runtime: 1hr 30min). beat and notes were played at a Dallas Buyers Club is a beau- The movie was animated by quick pace, Toei would animate ed film allowing the tifully directed film allowing Toei Animation (who also ani- an action scene to go with the viewer to see into the the viewer to see into the lives mated famous animes such as mood established by the track. of AIDS patients during the Sailor Moon and the Dragon Toei also put a large amount of lives of AIDS patients 80s. One will come to love the Ball series) and it was produced effort into the background as during the 80s.” characters and hope the best for by Daft Punk. The movie had well. Each area had its own dis- each of them despite the odds no dialogue, and had very few tinct trait that would bring life passes out in his trailer. Ron they face. Unlikable charac- sound effects, instead relying on to the area. For example, at the awakens in a hospital where he ters will earn a soft spot in the the film’s score to set the tone beginning of the film, the back- is then diagnosed with HIV and viewer’s heart as the character and mood of each scene. What ground was bright and the alien given a month to live. Due to the becomes more and more human. was the soundtrack? Discovery. city looked as if they were from heavy association of AIDS and Before watching, it should be Interstella 5555: The 5tory of a child’s imagination. homosexuality at the time, Ron noted that the film is rated R as the 5ecret 5tar 5ystem follows In short, Interstella 5555: The reacts negatively, as he is se- it contains strong language, sex- a band of four blue-skinned 5tory of the 5ecret 5tar 5ystem verely homophobic. ual situations, and drug use. The aliens named Stella, Arpegius, is a great film, with the disco Over several days, Ron re- film depicts human characters Baryl, and Octave, as they are beats from Discovery and the searches his disease and is os- and carries a message of love, abducted by the evil Earl De animation from Toei working in tracized by his friends who ac- strength, and perseverance. Darkwoode, while performing harmony to create one piece of cuse him of being gay. Isolated work. Fans of Daft Punk, anime, and fearing death, he begins il- and house music will enjoy the legally buying a new drug that is film, but non-fans should prob- being tested on AIDS patients. ably skip watching this film. The drug has poor effects on him which lands him as a patient in a street clinic where a doctor of- “...he passes out in his trailer.” fers him all-natural medicines not approved by the FDA, to combat his disease. Ron’s health Op-Ed 11 April 2016 Features section APRIL WORD SEARCH Horoscopes By: Laura Sullivan By: Laura Sullivan Website Editor Website Editor Aquarius (1/22-2/18) –Telling your problems on your own. lies, no matter how big or small Your stress may bring others is always a bad idea. down. Pisces (2/19-3/20) – Tempta- Virgo (8/24-9/22) –Maybe times tion may call, but moderation have been hard for you recently, counts. try to stay positive. Good things Aries (3/21-4/20) –Concentrate are coming your way. and make changes to yourself. Libra (9/23-10/23)- If you want Taurus (4/21-5/20) –Don’t to succeed, cut out all your dis- make unreasonable promises. It tractions and focus on yourself will only create problems. for a while. Gemini (5/21-6/20)-Travel op- Scorpio(10/24-11/22)–Tough portunities look favorable, but criticism will only help you. be cautious when you are driv- Don't ignore it. ing. Sagittarius (11/23-12/21) – Don't Cancer (6/21-7/22) –Never be put off anything that needs to be too confident that anyone is on done soon. Always strive for the your side. Some people's feel- best. ings change often. Capricorn(12/22-1/21)–Don't Leo (7/23-8/23) –You're feeling start anything new until all your emotional lately. Try to solve old business is dealt with.

Team Manuel Karate and Kickboxing 4006 Leonard Dr. Fredericksburg,VA 22407 540-642-2122 www.martialartsinfredericksburg.com

April 2016 12 Features FEATURES SENIOR STAFF OF THE LIGHTNING BOLT HAVE THEIR LAST WORDS

make y’all laugh and or smile. endless abyss of stress and anxi- “With every end there is a be- ety that will be your demise.” Matthew Sanders ginning, and with every be- Alright, I think i'm finally Senior Sports Editor ginning you open a new box done. It was a pretty decent ar- Alright then. I got a pencil, a just tell the student body not to of chocolates. You don’t know ticle I guess. Time to turn this piece of paper, and like 30 min- procrastinate! “Do not procras- what will be in that box, but in and -- “Matt! You're past utes to finish this. Let’s get it done! tinate!” Well that sounds a bit whatever’s in it will be good. Be- your deadline by 10 minutes. I Okay, let’s just start it off like, harsh and pretty boring. How cause there comes a day in every can't accept this article now.” “Now there comes a day in ev- about, “you know the due date, Charger’s life that makes him or Thanks procrastination! Well, at eryone’s life.” No, no, that just so hurry up, don’t procrasti- her sing ‘I’m proud to be a Char- least I tried. sounds weird. Maybe, “with ev- nate.” That definitely sounded ger, where at least I know I’m ery end, there is a beginning.” a lot better in my head. How free to express myself and show Nope, now I’m sounding like a about I just mash up everything the real me,’ but always remem- movie trailer for Star Wars. I got in my thoughts together. Be- ber, procrastination leads to an to find something good, some- sides, this senior farewell does thing that will catch the read- a good enough job at show- Thank god, i found the GOOD in er’s eyes, something that will ing why not to procrastinate. say, “Read me!” Something like, Okay, here goes nothing. “Life’s like a box of chocolates!” Hi, my name is Matthew Sand- goodbye By: Laura Sullivan saddened to think I won't be No, now I’m just plagiarizing ers, I’m a senior and a soon to Website Editor movie quotes to make myself be college freshman. Without a spending hours in this class- I remember hearing Mrs.Gat- sound cool. Maybe I should just doubt, I have loved every min- room anymore. I can easily say tie tell all the seniors when I say something from the heart. ute of my time here at Chancel- that Newspaper class was my was just a freshman that they Something that Matt Sanders lor, playing soccer, and being on favorite class all through high had to write their Senior Fare- would honestly say to the stu- this amazing newspaper staff. school. I think what I'll miss well articles. I thought to myself dent body that will give some I hope that I’ll be able to retain more than producing an awe- that it would be forever until I type of lesson and also make these memories for a long time some publication is the support got to write mine. Although it them laugh and smile. Some- and remember all the friends and teamwork from each and was four years after that, those thing that will embarrass myself I have made, the teachers that every student in newspaper. four years flew by faster than I as well as give me some sort of have made positive impacts in We are definitely a fam- could've ever imagined. As I am completeness that no other say- my life, the new experiences ily here. I hope that as myself sitting here in A113 writing this ing can give me. Something that that I have gone through, and and all of the other 2016 se- last article I am both thrilled shows how much I will miss this the moment I walk across the niors leave Newspaper that and sad all at the same. I’m be- schools and those who I have stage and get my diploma. Hon- it remain just as great, if not yond happy to be moving on to met throughout the four year estly, it’s a great feeling to be a better. Goodbye Newspaper. new things in my life, but also that I have been here. Some- senior leaving high school to thing thing that explains all the pursue a dream that I have de- awesome experiences I have veloped mainly throughout Rachel Thompson had and all the fun times I have these high school years. Even Senior Op-Ed Editor had while at this school. Some- in these last two minutes un- for Newspaper. thing like, “I’m proud to be an til my article should be due, I It’s safe to say that room A113 Writing this senior farewell American, where at least I know find myself reminiscing all the has been like my home away is bittersweet, because while I’m free,” – Lee Greenwood; only good times I have had, know- from home these past four I can’t wait to get out of high to replace “an American” with “a ing that there is no possible way years. It was definitely my fa- school I’m sure going to miss Charger” and add “to be who I for me to fit everything into vorite place to be. I came to this the close knit community and want to be” after the word “free.” this one article. However some class not knowing a thing about friendship in this room. I will If only I could just figure out things have to be left unsaid, be- Journalism. I thought it would truly miss it. I would always that one phrase that I could start cause I have a deadline to meet. just be like any other class, I look forward to A4 because that this senior farewell with that’d Though this will be the last ar- would get my work done and meant I could go to Newspaper be just dandy brain. Honestly, ticle I am assigned to write for then leave. But it’s so much where all my friends were. I will sometimes it just seems that my The Lighting Bolt newspaper, I am more than I thought. At first I always remember the memories brain shuts off when it knows positive that I will not be the last didn’t know where to start or and wonderful staff people I I need to finish something that article I will write in my lifetime. how to interview someone. Now meant here. has a deadline 10 minutes from So Chargers of Chancellor High my favorite articles to write “You become like the five now. Why do I procrastinate so School, I leave you with this about are teacher profiles or re- people you spend the most time much? Why do I do this to my- wonderful quote. Hoping that tirements. I love getting to know with. Choose carefully.” -Un- self anyways? That’s it! I could it help y’all in the long run and teachers. At the end of freshman known year I couldn’t wait to sign up Features 13 April 2016 FEATURES Jordan Pearson Editor-in-Chief For the past four years, A113 I have had three amazing Of course, I am going to miss along with me. Junior year I had has been the one room that I years on the staff, starting as Mrs. Gattie, arguably the best a position, Features Editor, and looked forward to stepping into a staff reporter, then Features teacher that I have ever had, I learned so much about layout. everyday, one that I looked for- Editor, to reaching the stage and by far my favorite. Thanks I was pushed and challenged ward to working in everyday. In that I am at currently: Editor- for all the help and for watching and grew as a writer and leader. this room I have memories that in-Chief. Each year has been me grow as a writer, a leader, Finally, this year has been I know I will always look back so much fun, introducing me and a person. I have loved being incredible. Being Editor-in- on and smile, I have friends to new people and teaching on this staff, it is always the Chief has been an unforgettable that I know I will keep in touch me valuable lessons. Thanks best part of my day. experience and I have gotten with, and I have gained skills to Neil and Megan, last years’ Every year that I so much out of this year. This that are imperative to my Editor-in-Chief and Co-Editor- room is more than just a work future. in-Chief, and Mrs. Gattie of have spent in this space, and these people are I didn’t walk into high school course, that I feel that I have room has been be- more than just my classmates. planning to take Journalism. had the strongest possible men- It’s been my creative outlet, my My electives were German torship and background, and I yond memorable, go- sanctuary of sorts. My class- and Band, both of which I was couldn’t be more grateful. ing all the way back mates are my friends, people I continuing on from middle Though graduating is some- love to spend my time with. school. However, because of a thing I have been looking to freshman year, Next year, The Lightning Bolt scheduling conflict, I was not forward to since the minute I when I learned the basics to will have all new editors and able to take German that year became a freshman, and though journalism and I wrote my first staff reporters, and I already and was left with an open spot. I am beyond excited now, there article (homecoming football know the potential that they If it weren’t for my friend Ra- are a few things I will miss, and game, which is kind of strange all possess. I wholeheartedly chel, who was taking Journal- the majority of those things are considering I have only written believe in this staff and can’t ism and didn’t want to be alone, related to being on The Light- one sports article on the news- wait to see the paper next year. I would not have signed up for ning Bolt staff. Some of my best paper). I also created my first I know that they are going to be this class. I guess I have her to friends can be found in this layout, and got to experiment awesome, and I am so excited to thank, but that was likely the room, and I know that they will with photography. Sophomore see everything that is done with best decision I have made these be some of the hardest people year was the first time I was a the paper. past four years. I was sucked in to leave behind as I move to part of any sort of publication, I’m going to miss being on right away, enthralled with the college. Every issue is another my own writing printed. My this staff and the people I have idea of writing and publishing. adventure spent with people I core group of friends that I have met and gotten to know over From there I decided I wanted truly enjoy spending time and had throughout high school the years, but I will cherish the to be on the newspaper. working with. were by my side, having fun memories and the experience that this has given me. Kaitlyn O’Gorman Senior News Editor The past four years have been mental breakdown. have helped me get back on my cause I got to talk to people that fun, boring, exciting, repeti- Those same people feet too many times to count. I probably wouldn’t ever have tive, lame, and probably hold Being part of The Lightning the opportunity to talk to if it some of my favorite moments. were there through Bolt Newspaper has been wasn’t for these interviews. The past four years have taught all four long years, to stressful, but also extremely re- All the friendships me harsh lessons, knocked me warding and character building. down, and changed just about pick me up, support The biggest impact newspaper and the fun I’ve had everything I thought I wanted me, and sometimes has had on me is that it taught in A113 was definitely and who I thought I was. Fresh- me how to talk to people, (with man year I walked into Journal- slap me, tell me to minimal sweating). worth all the stress ism I with basically no friends stop being dumb, and Freshman year, in and panic attacks and no idea what I was doing. because the deadline was I still don’t know what I’m do- to get my life back in Journalism I, I made three days ago and I still hadn’t ing, but the people I have met check. up all the interviews finished any of my articles. BUT in this room taught me that it’s Freshman year I didn’t know we had to conduct again I wouldn’t trade it for really okay to not know what where I’d be in four years, and anything. you're doing, to not have a solid honestly I’m still really lost, but (sorry Mrs. Gattie). life plan, and it’s okay to be the friends I made here in this Four years later I get so weird and have an occasional room (including Mrs. Gattie) excited to do an interview, be- April 2016 14 Features FEATURES

Photo By Danielle Gray Seniors spend some last moments together as members of the The Lightning Bolt Newspaper Staff. From Left to Right: Jordan Pearson, Kaitlyn O’Gorman, Rachel Thompson, Laura Sullivan, and Matthew Sanders.

Features 15 April 2016 FEATURES Chastain Chronicles Chapter 7: The End, For Now By: Tyler Jacobs forced Chastain to tirelessly only illumination provided was it. Natasha had marked their Features Editor Elect pursue, which Chastain found that of the dimly lit street lamps course which would take them A year of pursuing a vicious suspicious. It was as if Marcus and passing cars, both being through the subway tunnels. danger to society, an old friend. was letting Chastain rest up be- sparse. Chastain came upon a “We cut through here, despite An enigma who leaves a trail fore their conflict would finally subway entrance and looked the map saying otherwise. of meticulous, brutal murders conclude. around cautiously. He glanced There’s a new tunnel that isn’t in his wake. Marcus’s reign of Chastain used his time to look at his watch, making sure he on the map leading straight terror hiding under the shadow into his lead on Marcus. It was was on time. It was 2:13 AM, toward Valentino.” of human ignorance was going an opposing vampire coven, run and he was early by two min- to end, and Chastain was going by a man named Valentino, that utes. Chastain walked down the “And you’re sure?” to be the one to stop it. probably wanted Marcus dealt steps and entered the concrete Chastain questioned, It had been raining for the with as much as Chastain. They cavern, lit by flickering fluores- past week, the heavy droplets were in control of Long Island cent bulbs along the moldy and studying the dark drawing out all of the city’s long before Marcus took over, paint chipped ceilings. Chastain marker lines made by secrets and grime. Chastain al- but their policies weren’t as pulled out a handkerchief and ways viewed dreary weather as aggressive as his, wanting to be wiped the water from his face Natasha. an omen. Winter was supposed secretive and less involved with and neck. He walked around “Never been more to be over, and the extension human society. Marcus desper- the station, arms crossed over of it forbade death and dismal ately wanted to be woven into his chest. sure in my life,” Na- outcomes. Chastain needed human culture and would do “There you are,” said a calm, tasha assured him. to act and fast, but he had no whatever he could to interfere soothing female voice. Natasha idea where Marcus was or what in the lives of innocent people. approached Chastain wearing Natasha pulled out Marcus was planning to do Chastain pushed his hands a solemn expression. She wore a flashlight from her next. It had been three weeks deep into his pockets, trudging a navy blue parka with fur trim since the last task Marcus had along the slippery concrete. The around the hood, slimming jacket and cracked jeans, and steel-toed, black her neck. “You ready, combat boots. “I was at the next southward station. No one there Chastain?” “Never been more ready in either, not even a lady of the my life,” Chastain replied with night.” a small smile. “Let’s get go- “You bring the ing.” The pair set off toward the north tunnel and entered the map?” Chastain abyss, Natasha's LED flashlight questioned, taking leading their way. “Et erit lux,” Chastain mumbled, an orb of another look around. light forming above their map Minor paranoia was of the subway network. “We make a right across the growing at the back tracks through this mainte- of his mind. The last nance wing into the parallel tunnel and we head south,” thing he needed was Natasha explained, jumping off a goblin attack or the walkway along the tracks and over to the other side. someone to spy on Chastain followed and climbed them. “We need to up over the handrail. Before them was a sealed metal door get moving, the faster labeled ‘Maintenance.’ Natasha the better.” shook the handle and sighed. “Right here,” Natasha stated “Chastain, if you would.” as she pulled a folded document “No problem,” Chastain from one of her parka’s pock- returned. He gripped the ets. She placed it in Chastain’s handle and closed his eyes, Natasha Kalunga-Anansi Illustration by Makayla Tardie hand, and they stood together light flickering from under his as he opened and observed palm. The handle began to glow

April 2016 16 Features FEATURES and snapped off. He attempted “Leave ussss!” the reptilian cern. “Come along, friends.” ing. He turned toward his new to push the door, to no avail. creature hissed, lingering on the Julius waved them along and visitors, running his hands It was far too heavy for him ‘s.’ Natasha struggled and then turned around, walking down through his wavy, silver hair. to cast an incantation quiet slammed the creature against the tunnel. “We pass through “Hello and benvenuto. Wel- enough to not alert anyone. the cinderblock wall. “Valen- here.” Julius led Chastain and come, friends. What a plea- “Help me,” Chastain request- tino’s land! Leave!” Chastain Natasha to a brick wall and sure to meet such a beautiful ed. Then the duo pressed up pulled his stake from inside pushed one of the bricks into woman,” the old man said to against the door and pushed it his coat. The handle was an the wall, revealing a hidden Natasha, kissing her hand. “And inward, the screeching of the ivory cross and the wood white passage. He smiled at the duo seeing you again, Damian Chas- hinges echoing down the tun- oak with a silver rod within it. and led them down a stairwell. tain, a sight for sore eyes.” The nel. “Let’s go before someone or Natasha struggled, putting up The walls were painted crimson man’s Italian accent was thick something decides to follow the heavy resistance. She grabbed and a cello played. but understandable. He seemed noise.” the humanoid lizard creature “Whoever is playing, my to breathe charisma. Natasha continued to lead by the wrists and threw it over compliments,” Natasha stated, “Grazie, Valentino, the plea- Chastain toward the supposed her head, slamming it into the putting her hands into her sure extends to me,” Chastain temporary headquarters of the ground. The beast hissed and pockets. She looked around replied, firmly shaking Valen- Valentino coven. “So this Valen- leapt on the corroded wall of with great interest, observing tino’s hand. It was rare seeing a tino, what do you know about the tunnel, crawling around. It the paintings, furniture, and vampire who had been turned him?” Natasha questioned, was seemingly deciding where cardboard boxes containing at such an old age, but Valen- avoiding stepping on a rat. to strike next. more belongings. “You recently tino’s appearance was a well “I met him forty years ago at “Stop this!” rang a male voice moved here?” kept secret. “But I’m not here a banquet I was looking into. further down the tunnel. “Val- “Valentino had to...relocate,” for kicks.” I can tell you he’s so polite entino welcomes these guests, Julius sighed softly. He led them “Ah, let’s not get into that yet, that it’s uncomfortable. His Kundalini.” A man wearing a into a study where the cello amico. Let’s eat first, please,” words are concise and prompt,” bright blue v-neck and khaki player sat, facing away from Valentino smiled, waving over Chastain stated. “But he’s very pants walked into the light. them. The cello player ceased Julian and whispering into his indirect.” The lizard creature leapt off the and leaned his instrument ear. “That’s going to be a problem ceiling and stood behind the against his chair. He took a “No, old man. We’re here for for us,” Natasha grumbled. “We pale man. “Pardon my associ- deep breath and stood, stretch- need someone who’s going to ate, friends. We aren’t used to answer us and not beat around getting visitors.” the bush.” A reptilian hiss “Well you need to teach that echoed through the tunnel and little freak to keep his claws to the pair stopped in their tracks. himself,” Natasha snarled, pull- ing her hand out of her parka. “We both heard She didn’t see any reason to that, right?” Natasha increase hostility by bringing out her dagger. asked quietly. “Well I’m Julius. Kundalini “Don’t move,” Chas- and I work for Valentino. He welcomes you to his… tempo- tain whispered. He rary home. And I personally reached over to the apologize for any trouble you’ve both come across on your way orb of light that hov- here,” Julius explained,using ered over Natasha’s hand gestures frequently. “I’ve been sent to retrieve you for map. “Magna,” Chas- him.” tain mumbled. The “Then let’s meet him,” Chastain said with a feigned smile, put- orb of illumination ting his stake back into his coat. went up to the ceiling He watched Julius’s eyes follow the vampire killing weapon into and lit up the tunnel. the heavy coat. “I’m Chastain A humanoid figure and this here is Natasha.” Chas- tain patted Natasha’s shoulder leapt toward them gently. and latched onto Na- “Pleasure to meet you,” Julius smiled, his eyes showing con- Damian Chastain tasha. Illustration by Makayla Tardie Features 17 April 2016 FEATURES Marcus,” Natasha cut in. “No Marcus kicked us out. He’s liv- you all can deal with his fist, worry spreading across avoiding this.” ing it up in my household, fill- his face. “Cutting to the chase, huh? Al- ing it with his ravenous parties Marcus if your inten- “Are you going to kill me?” right, alright,” Valentino stated, and eccentric deeds. You know tions are indeed what Marcus asked simply. Chastain putting his hands up. “Let’s talk my people, we stopped killing didn’t respond. He hung up and about that Germain child.” humans almost three-hundred you say.” slipped the phone back into one “Valentino, again, grazie for years ago. We act behind the “They are true, Julius. Trust of his inner pockets. welcoming us into your home-” curtains, meanwhile Marcus us,” Chastain replied as they “Come on,” Chastain said, Chastain started off. tears them down. He’s going to stopped at a door which depict- starting towards the hotel “No, hunter, this is no home. expose everything, Damian.” ed Biblical stories, hand carved doors. Natasha stood stationary. Marcus took my home from “Then let us get you back to into the wood. Chastain turned and looked at me,” Valentino cut off Chastain, where you belong, Valentino. “Thank you, Damian,” Julius her. “Natasha?” showing minor aggression. He Back to your home,” Natasha smiled sadly. He opened the “Are you going to kill him?” took a seat in a leather arm- replied. She placed a hand on door and revealed a portal. “It’s Natasha questioned, her hood chair, gripping the armrests. Valentino’s for added effect. a safe passageway.” Chastain shadowing her solemn features. “We’re looking to get rid of “We’ve been tracking him to and Natasha walked through She stood motionless. “If you him, Valentino. We need to the best of our ability. My best and found themselves at the aren’t, I can’t go. Because I will. know where he is,” Natasha men and women, some have subway station where they He had me locked up as a killer stated blandly. She wasn’t going gone missing. But their con- had met that night. Chastain for six months. I will kill him, to waste any time with formali- tributions are great,” Valentino pulled the slip of paper with Damian.” ties. sighed. “We’ve found that he’s the address from his pocket and “Natasha... Please,” Chastain “Are you really? Is this true, been frequenting a penthouse studied it. mumbled. His crystal blue eyes Damian?” Valentino asked, uptown. Julius, the address.” “Let’s go, Natasha,” Chastain searched for hers. He didn’t leaning forward. “Did you get Valentino waved his hand said simply. Natasha stood know the answer to her ques- rid of him last time I was told and Julius wrote the address on silent for a moment, thinking to tion. you would?” a small sheet of paper, handing herself quickly before following “If you aren’t, I’m leav- “This isn’t like last time, Val- it off to Damian. him. ing. You’ll be on your own entino,” Chastain growled. “He “Grazie, Valentino,” Chastain ------with him,” Natasha stated. A needs to be stopped this time.” stated, as he read the address. Chastain and Nata- blue mist that she apparently “For good?” Valentino ques- He shook Valentino’s hand and couldn’t see formulated around tioned. “The things that man stood up. sha stood in front of her feet. Elektra walked out has done. What he’s said he was “I’ll have my people contact an uptown hotel. It from behind her. going to do. I want him dead, you in the future, Damian. “Do not worry for her, Dami- Damian.” Next time we can discuss other seemed to loom over an. You must follow the path of business besides enemies. We them, taunting them. light, Paladin. She will return. “Just tell me where can talk friends,” Valentino said Do not let her hatred cloud your he is, Valentino,” with a small smile. “And you Chastain stepped judgement,” Elektra stated, her miss Natasha, I’ll be contacting towards the doors be- melodic voice echoing around Chastain pleaded. you as well. You both may leave. him, seemingly clearing his “We both want him Julius, show them the pristine fore the phone Mar- head. He knew what he needed way out.” cus had given him to do. dealt with. So where “Come along, friends. No need “Natasha, whatever it is I plan is he?” to come through the tunnels,” started ringing. He to do, I need to do it alone. Go Julius entered the room with Julius said with a smile. He led pulled it from one of to your family, be safe. Won’t a small plate, on which was a Chastain and Natasha out of drag you down with me,” Chas- tall bottle. Julius uncorked the Valentino’s study and through his inner pockets and tain stated. Elektra smiled and bottle and poured the crimson the blood red painted corridors. answered, glancing at walked back behind Natasha, liquid into a wine glass for The cello once again started disappearing. Natasha pulled Valentino. Valentino lifted the playing, resonating elegantly Natasha. her hood back, her frustration glass to his lips and sipped it through the halls. “Hello, Damian. I see that evident. delicately. Julius stood behind old man gave me up,” Marcus Valentino’s chair, biting his lip “Ever since we were stated, he sounded ecstatic. “Are you serious? as he observed the situation. kicked out of his “As expected. Goodness, it is You won’t give me “Tutto apposto, Damian, al- so wonderful to see you so close right,” Valentino sighed. He set place, he plays for again. I’ve been looking forward the satisfaction of down his glass of blood. “You hours without end. to it. seeing the light fade want to know why myself and “Can’t say I feel the same my family are living in this rat- His wife can’t even way,” Chastain replied, looking from his manic eyes?” hole? Because your little amico, stop him. Hopefully up at the building. He clenched Natasha snarled. “I April 2016 18 Features FEATURES want to watch you Chastain got to the top floor, turned the knob slowly and and suddenly the door to the the louder the music became. pushed the door open, stepping penthouse was kicked open. put the stake right At the top floor, a speaker held in. He closed the door and faced One of Marcus’s guards hold- through his heart and the door open. Chastain kicked Marcus who stood behind a ing a crossbow, fired a silver the speaker out of his way and desk. Chastain stepped forward. tipped bolt at Chastain, landing if not you, I want to pushed open the door, stopping Marcus leaned forward on the the arrow in Chastain’s right be the one to drive the music. Chastain entered the desk. “Thank you so much for shoulder. Chastain howled in corridor, walking to the door- coming.” pain and dropped to his knees, my dagger right be- way at the end. Chastain took a “If you wanted me to come clutching the desk for support. tween his ribs!” deep breath and heard several here so badly, you could have Marcus jumped up on the desk, “No! Go to your family! You doors behind him open. He just told me where you were,” a look of pure joy upon his face. killed for him before and I turned and watched as several Chastain stated, staring straight “I’ve made you won’t let him make you do it other vampires, each dressed in into Marcus’s cerulean blue again! It’s what he wants from black suits with red ties, various eyes. kneel again!” you, Natasha. So go,” Chas- trolls also stepped out from “I wanted you to see that I Marcus laughed. tain barked back. “Go home.” the doors. They faced forward, could make the mightiest of my Chastain turned away from her. standing guard. Chastain sighed enemies kneel before me like “Now how about you “Marcus isn’t your problem, and turned back to the door the garbage they are. Valentino where he knew Marcus resided. is only one of the ones kneeling. lay down!” he’s mine.” Marcus kicked Chastain in the “Come in!” Marcus yelled I made you kneel too,” Marcus jaw and sent him backwards. “You dare say that from beyond the door. Chastain smiled. He slid over the desk Chastain landed on his back, to me? After all he’s the crossbow bolt pushed done to me and what through Chastain’s shoulder and exited the other side. we have done togeth- “You lousy cheat,” Chastain er to find him?” Nata- grunted, clutching the crossbow bolt. He groaned and ripped it sha questioned, tears out of his shoulder. Chastain of frustration slowing clamored to his feet, stumbling around. “No more cheating, coming along. fight me fairly” Chastain pulled “Go home, Natasha Kalunga- a metallic canister from inside Anansi. To your son, your his coat and poured holy water daughter, your husband! Go on his hands. He rubbed his home to the people you fought hands together after putting the to be with for six months! The canister away. Marcus jumped people you killed for. Go home,” Marcus leaning over his desk. off the desk and smiled. Chastain ordered. Illustration by Makayla Tardie “Fine, Damian. Fine,” Natasha and walked towards Chastain. “If that is truly the case, I ask “Let’s,” Marcus replied. “Go to hell while you’re “From my point of view-” again,” Marcus began. “Are you smiled. He lunged to- at it.” Natasha turned away Chastain was cut off by Mar- going to kill me? Finally end and started walking. Chastain cus who put his index finger to this little conflict between the ward Chastain, fangs wiped away a tear of frustration Chastain’s lips. two of us that has gone on for exposed. Chastain sorrow. Chastain took a deep “You think all those tasks all these years?” breath and then turned toward I sent you on were just for “That’s what everyone wants, grappled with Mar- the hotel, entering. It was pris- giggles? I had you running er- isn’t it?” Chastain questioned. cus and tossed him tine and extravagant, but there rands, dear. You did everything “It seems like the best option, wasn’t a staff member in sight. that I asked without question. all things considered.” Chas- over his head, slam- “Alright, Marcus,” Chastain You killed monsters who threat- tain cracked his knuckles and ming him against the stated. “Let’s finish this, old ened my position,” Marcus said crossed his arms over his chest. friend.” Chastain entered the as he withdrew his finger from Marcus grinned and took his marble wall behind hotel stairwell and ascended. Chastain’s lips. “All you did for finger and pressed down on him. The thought of what he needed me was clean house.” Marcus Chastain’s nose. Chastain grabbed the nearest to do burned at his philosophy, leaned back on his desk and “Boop,” Marcus chuckled, chair and smashed it on Mar- his morality. Suddenly, ‘All I crossed his arms over his chest. sliding back over his desk. cus. Marcus grunted and kicked Ask of You’ from Phantom of “Fine. I’ve knelt,” Chastain “Yes. Killing me would seem Chastain in the shin, kicking the Opera echoed down the replied, stepping towards Mar- like the best option I suppose. him down. Marcus climbed to stairwell. “You and your music,” cus. “But now I’m standing. The But I’m afraid that I can’t let his feet and grabbed one of the Chastain sighed. The closer games are over, Marcus.” that happen.” Marcus smiled legs from the broken chair. He

Features 19 April 2016 FEATURES began beating Chastain with one ruin your perception of me! it, yelling obscenities as he did Even if it was part of my plan to Watchmen, a Graphic Novel so. Chastain put his arms up in cheat!” Chastain kicked Marcus in the As Marcus spoke, stomach. He stood as Marcus to Watch Out For was keeling over in pain. Chas- Chastain ripped tions of these costumed crime- tain pulled his fist back and By Tyler Jacobs the stake out of his Features Editor Elect fighters have on the people of connected it with Marcus’s jaw. the world and the governments “This is over, Marcus,” Chas- bleeding shoulder. Watchmen, a graphic novel from the 80s written by Alan around the world, especially tain growled. He kneed Marcus during a time where tensions in the stomach and then kicked Chastain groaned Moore and drawn by Dave Gibbons is one of the most re- were at their height between him in the mouth, sending and stood up slowly. Russia and America. People ev- Marcus to the ground. Chas- nowned and profound graphic Marcus shouted at novels of all time according to erywhere were constantly on tain straddled Marcus and be- edge and ready for disaster. gan punching him repeatedly. the remains of what critics such as the New York Marcus shoved his thumb into Times. The comic takes place Ultimately, Watch- Chastain’s shoulder wound. used to be a guard. during the height of the cold war “Marcus, you changed my men is a commentary Chastain yelled out and clasped and follows the lives of several perception of you years ago. He his hands around Marcus’s arm ‘heroes’ including Dr. Manhat- on morality, psychol- had nothing to do with it. You trying to pull it away. Marcus tan, Nite-Owl, Rorschach, the always were seeking the easy ogy, and human soci- used his free arm and reached Comedian, Silk Spectre, and way out, always cheating. Even inside Chastain’s coat, pull- Ozymandias. ety as a whole. when we fought side-by-side,” ing out Chastain’s infamous It offers a slew of morally am- Chastain explained, now stand- Watchmen isn’t any stake. Marcus gripped the stake biguous characters with ex- ing behind Marcus. Marcus and stabbed Chastain through ordinary superhero traordinary abilities, but ordi- went silent. “Marcus, I did all the other shoulder. Chastain nary lives. There is a character that I could to save you from story however. The screamed and fell off of Marcus. for which everyone can relate the darkness which brewed Marcus got on his knees and novel paints a world to, like, or dislike. in you, and I still will.” Mar- then slammed his fist down on The story of Watchmen is of- cus turned around and faced in fantastic neo-noir the stake, driving it through the ten highly convoluted, ensur- Chastain. rest of Chastain’s shoulder. panels what it would ing that the readers will have to “Damian, everything I’ve be like if heroes ac- glance over pages a few times “Have fun getting done, I’ve done for you,” Mar- so that one can actually un- that out,” Marcus cus stated. “You were my hero tually existed in the derstand what is happening. when you were my mentor. And The novel contains many over- barked. He cracked after I turned… I tried so hard real world, their effects on society, pop arching plots and subplots as to stop the urges but I couldn’t. it switches point of view and his neck and turned So I figured that the only way to culture, and world peace. It also dives into the psychology of the travels back and forth in time. away from Chastain. learn from you was to challenge Watchmen is meant for mature you.” Marcus hugged Chastain. heroes depicted within the pag- “When was the last es, the human beings who wear readers and can be very confus- “I’ll never stop, Damian. And ing, however, if one wishes for time we fought, Da- you’ll never stop.” the masks for the greater good. The comic isn’t about fantas- a lengthy and profound read, “Stop this Marcus,” Chastain Watchmen is that read. mian? I can’t think at replied. He eyed the stake as he tical battles, but what the ac- all!” Marcus started held it over Marcus’s back. “Damian you were like my laughing again. brother. You were the only thing He picked up the silver cross- I had. I love you, Damian,” Mar- bow bolt off the ground and cus mumbled, holding Damian turned toward his guard who tighter. stood in the doorway. Marcus “I love you too, Marcus,” smiled as he approached. “Bye Damian stated. Tears fell down bye,” Marcus grinned. He pulled his cheeks as he continued to the bolt back and slammed it stare at the stake hovered over into the chest of his guard. The Marcus’s back. He could end it vampire’s face was an expres- for good. sion of pure shock before he disintegrated into ash. “I never 1. Kill Marcus liked that guy, Damian. He 2. Let Marcus Live and Impris- should have known you’d call on Him Photo by comicvine.gamestop.com me a cheater. Can’t have some- April 2016 20 Features Special FEATURES SECTION The following section was produced for the Fredericksburg Area Food Bank’s 9th Annual Seminar

Special 21 April 2016 Recipes By Mary Cate Mosher

Ingredients: 7 large eggs 1/8 teaspoon salt 2-3 tbsp mayonnaise 1/8 teaspoon black pepper squirt of yellow mustard paprika to sprinkle on top Steps: 1. Place eggs in large pot with lid. 2. Place cold water in the pot covering the eggs with one inch of water. 3. Bring water to boil over high heat. 4. Turn off burner, place pot on cool burner, place lid on pot and let sit for 12 min- utes. 5. Drain eggs and run under cold water or refrigerate eggs until cold. 6. Peel eggs. 7. Carefully slice eggs in half lengthwise. 8. Place cooked eggs yolks in a bowl. If a white hard cooked egg does not look good chop it up and add it with the egg yolk. Mash the yolks and mix the mayonnaise, mus- tard, salt and pepper together. 9. Place the hard cooked egg whites on a platter or egg plate. Fill each hard cooked egg white with the egg yolk mixture. 10. Sprinkle the filled eggs with paprika. 11. Keep refrigerated. Enjoy! April 2016 22 Recipes Ingredients: 2 eggs butter grated cheese of your choice (cheddar herbs (optional) works well) half &half (optional) ham salt and pepper (optional) Steps: 1. First you will need to grate as much cheese as you want to use into a bowl. You will also need to cut up the ham into small pieces and set both aside. 2. Crack eggs into a bowl and whisk them with a fork, whisk, or egg beater. 3. Once the eggs are whisked add about 2 tablespoons of half and half. This will make the eggs in your omelet more fluffy. For added flavor sprinkle in some salt and pepper or herbs into your eggs. 4. Place a nonstick pan on the stove and turn to medium heat. Cut a piece of butter (about as much as you would put on a piece of toast) on to the pan and let it melt. Make sure the butter is spread around the pan so your omelet doesn’t stick. 5. As soon as the butter is all melted and has stopped sizzling, pour your eggs into the pan. Now comes the tricky part. Using a spatula in one hand and holding the pan in the other hand drag and push the eggs around the pan. Also use the spatula to lift the edges of the omelet and allow the un- cooked egg to flow underneath the cooked egg. Make sure to move the pan around to ensure that all the egg gets cooked and to that the bottom of your omelet is not stuck to the pan. 6. Once all the egg is cooked, (about 2 minutes) turn down the heat on the stove. Add your ham and cheese to one half of the omelet. 7. Fold the omelet in half on the pan, then use the spatula to help get the omelet off the pan and onto a plate.

23 April 2016 Recipes By Lilly Church

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1st Recipe for Egg White Icing Ingredients:

1 cup white sugar ⅓ cup water ¼ teaspoon cream of tartar 2 egg whites 1 teaspoon vanilla extract Steps: 1. Combine the first three ingredients in a saucepan over medium heat until bubbly. 2. In a separate bowl, beat together the vanilla and egg whites until the mixture looks like fluffy, white mountain peaks 3. Add the bubbly mixture to the egg white peaks 4. Beat until stiff peaks are formed and serve April 2016 24 2nd Recipe for Egg White Icing Ingredients: 3 egg whites 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 4 cups powdered sugar Steps: In a bowl, mix the egg whites and vanilla until light and frothy Gradually add sugar to the mixture and beat on a low speed until the new mixture is shiny Beat on high until the icing forms peaks (5-7 minutes) If applicable, add food dye to the mixture and beat until the color is spread evenly throughout the icing Add to any dessert for a delicious sweetness

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25 April 2016 Recipes By Myah Hidalgo

Photo source: quiche pie crust cooking food dinner.jpg public domain image Ingredients: Steps: 1 ready made pie crust 1. Whisk eggs and half and half togeth- 8 eggs er until blended well and smooth. 1/2 cup half and half 2. Layer cheese and bacon in bottom of 8 pieces cooked bacon, crumbled pie crust. 1 cup of swiss cheese, shredded 3. Pour in egg mixture. chopped green onions, optional 4. Top with option green onions if de- salt and pepper to taste sired. 5. Bake at 350* for 40 minutes or until Egg Haiku toothpick comes out clean. Scrambled, fried, or sunny 6. Serve immediately with fresh fruit Eggs any way still taste yummy and/or toast. Enjoy! Fill up your tummy! -Myah Hidalgo

April 2016 26 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5) Ingredients: • 1 dozen eggs, hard boiled, peeled, chopped 1/2- 1 cup of mayonnaise, until desired consistency, more for creamier salad, less for more dry 1/2 cup pickle relish 1/2 cup finely chopped white or red onion, optional 2 tbsp mustard, preferably whole grain salt and pepper to taste • Steps: 1. Mix above ingredients thoroughly until desired consistency. 2. Prepare sandwiches on bread or toast of your choosing; white, wheat, pumper- nickel or rye work well. 3. Serve with pickles and/or deli chips. 4. Enjoy!

27 April 2016 Egg Battlefield Real Eggs or Egg Substitutes? By: Danielle Gray and Kaitlyn O’Gorman Why have real eggs when you can have year or longer. That is way better than the fake eggs? two weeks of an actual egg. Real eggs are really messy and can cause bacterial con- When deciding whether to eat a real egg or tamination and nobody wants that. That is an egg substitute, consider the following. why powdered are great because they are The first step in the powdered egg mak- easy to use and clean up. ing process is breaking the eggs and sepa- rating the yolks from the unwanted shells. Baking with powdered eggs is easier. The eggs are processed by automated Powdered eggs are simple to equipment that moves the eggs from Why use and they blend well with flats, washes them and sanitizes the have the other ingredients. With shells, breaks the eggs and separates real eggs real eggs you have to crack the whites and yolks or keeps them them and be bothered with together for the whole egg process. It when you whether you dropped the is a good substitute for vegetarians, could have shell in it or not. You also vegans and many people. have to deal with if they are fake eggs? thawed out or not. It is just Second powdered eggs contain a overall stressful. lot of beneficial values. For example, one tablespoon of powdered egg contains These eggs are also great if you the same nutritional value of an real egg. are going camping; you can just whip out These eggs are also fat-free, 75 calories, some powdered eggs. With using real eggs cholesterol free, has vitamin D, vitamin you have to worry about cooking them A, and thirteen other essential vitamins and bringing all your cooking gear along. needed. All you need to cook up powdered eggs is some water, put it over heat and there Normal eggs must be kept refrigerated, you. Go eggs! Please remember if you but powdered eggs do not need to be under cook them you have the threat of cold. Dry eggs can also be stored up to a getting salmonella and other diseases.

April 2016 28 Egg Battlefield Decide What is Best for Your Lifestyle Real eggs are natural and good for you, an egg is just as easy as pouring this pro- while egg substitutes are powdered and cessed substance into a frying pan. A real just not the real deal. Why would anyone egg’s flavor beats the Egg Beater’s unnat- buy an egg substitute when they can get ural flavoring any day. the less expensive real egg option? Other than it being an easier option, what What When buying a carton of eggs reason would anyone have to buy at the grocery store one knows fake eggs? Both egg options con- reason exactly what they’re getting tain high amounts of protein, how- would themselves into. It’s twelve eggs ever what goes into making these and if they’re all natural, and if egg substitutes? An egg laid by a anyone they’re organic, they’re 100% chicken is natural, an egg substi- have to without a doubt natural. A cus- tute is processed liquid made in a buy fake tomer picking up a carton of egg factory. substitutes should read the back eggs? for the nutrition facts to know ex- Egg Beaters is a popular form of egg actly what they’re about to put in their substitute and pretty much all of America body. Unless one knows what Folic Acid has heard of this brand. Egg Beaters are and Alpha Tocopheryl Acetate are, they made of 99% egg whites and 1% natural probably won’t know what they’re getting flavor, along with Color, Spices, Salt, On- themselves into. Bottom line, no matter ion Powder, Vegetable Gum, and other how “natural” egg substitutes might say random vitamins and minerals added into they are, think twice. the concoction. That is not an egg, at all. If you want an egg for breakfast cracking

29 April 2016 Word Scramble By Talon Torres Directions: Unscramble each word! HINT: All of the words have an egg as an ingredient Trat Tualb TomeeleT Keca Dalas Lvedeid Alovavp Nawihcsd Egg Haikus Don’t walk on eggshells Feel free to have a good time. Don’t live by limits.

Eggs are a treasure So simply open the chest And take all the gold -Tyler Jacobs

April 2016 30 Dangers of Salmonella By Emma Haus cording to www.webmd. used to replace eggs in Salmonella? Keep Salmonella or Salmo- com, Salmonella poi- cooking is applesauce foods such as eggs, beef, nellosis also known as soning occurs 12 to 72 which is recommended and poultry refrigerated a type of food poison- hours after consumed in their banana bread until needed for cook- ing caused by the sal- and lasts about four to recipe. ing, and cook the items monella enterica bacte- seven days. Symptoms properly. rium, which sometimes include diarrhea, fever, How do you prevent is found in eggs. Many cramps and dehydra- people in the United tion. Although this does states slightly fear this not sound pleasant, the Egg Haikus bacterial disease in illness is rare. In eggs, 1 My eggs benedict eggs, however, it is not a out of every 20,000 is in- Goes of my English muffin deadly illness. fected with Salmonella. It tastes really good. Salmonella is a common Although this illness is -Danielle Gray illness that can be found highly unlikely to oc- in more than just a main cur, restaurants still take cooking ingredient. precautions in replac- Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg This illness is found in ing eggs in recipes with Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg food items from beef to other ingredients. Ac- Egg Egg Egg Egg Egg. poultry, and can harbor cording to Chefinyou. in a kitchen sponge. Ac- com, one popular item -Mary Cate Mosher

31 April 2016 Egg Battlefield

By Myah Hidalgo and Jordan Pearson Hop Off the Hype Lately everybody of eggs, you would as eggs can be a this can be damaging has been jumping on have to pay relatively waste of money. to the eggs. Because the “organic trend”, $4.18, 61% of this, your best transforming their more It Organic eggs bet would be to buy entire diets to or- than may seem can be ex- them straight from ganic products and non t r e m e l y farmers. This is in- ingredients. There organic. that grocery d i f f i c u l t convenient for many are, of course, ben- With stores to find. It shoppers, especially efits to this, but is similar may seem in metro areas, un- it worth the extra health carry that gro- less you have person- amount of money bene- organic cery stores al connections. and the search to fits, the carry or- find organic eggs? extra eggs, but ganic eggs, If you are focusing on cost is those can but those improving your diet, Eggs are full of a bit can not there are many other nutrients, organic unreal- not be trust- be trusted options that will ben- or not, packed istic for ed as truly as truly efit you more than with vitamins and some o r g a n i c . organic eggs. Think healthy for your people, organic. In many twice about spend- diet. Although there espe- states it’s il- ing the extra money are more nutrients cially if legal to sell on something that in organic eggs, they are trying to organic eggs if they doesn’t need much an everyday non- transform their en- aren’t processed in improving. organic egg is also tire diet. Dietary a certain way, and incredibly healthy. or specialty foods Egg-cellent Jokes The relative cost are typically pricey, of a non-organic and there are other Why did the chicken win the comedy contest? His jokes were Eggcelent! carton of eggs from foods that have the grocery store is lower health benefits What happens when you microwave an egg? An Eggsplosion! $2.59. However, if that need replacing. you want to pay for Replacing already -Talon Torres the organic carton healthy foods such April 2016 32 Egg Battlefield

The Truth About Real Eggs For years companies the men who worked of starch, resin, and especially when it have tried many dif- dawn to dusk. Once pigments. Other ad- comes when it comes ferent ways to create America was fully ditives make up the to human health, food that will last lon- populated and gro- yolk, and this whole and definitely when ger, taste better, and cery stores came to mixture is put into it involves food. The take a shorter amount exist, eggs were col- a mold then dipped reason organic food of time to make for lected from coops, in a calcium carbon- is more pricey is mass output. Fast washed, and ate based faux because it not only food chains and large put in card- Real shell to re- tastes better, but it food processors are board car- is always sult in the also is significantly infamously associ- tons by utter dis- better for the health ated with this harm- the dozen. better than grace that of all humans. ful food processing, Now, in fake is the fake and now grocery the 21st egg. stores carry thou- century, a Real is al- sands of processed, new phenomenon of ways better than fake, unnatural foods on egg has been born; their shelves. The the fake egg. Egg-cellent Jokes egg, one of the most What is a saint’s favorite breakfast meal? nutritionally benefi- The fake egg was Eggs Benedict. cial and protein filled created to provide a foods, is one of the How does a chicken annoy people? cheaper alternative to He eggs them on. many organic foods real eggs. They look that has been altered and taste like the nat- -Talon Torres and downgraded. ural kind, but what they are made of is In the 1800s, eggs disgusting. Accord- were collected by ing to an article in hand from chicken Time magazine, fake coops and cooked egg whites are made inside log cabins for from a combination

33 April 2016 uses a formula to measure the pro- tein quality based on the height of its egg white. They judge the egg whites, also called albumen, by its clarity and firm- ness. They also check for the qual- ity of the yolk itself; they check for cor- By: Ashley Ragonese First when grading misshaping may be rect color, thick- an egg the grader in- passed, but with a ness, and other Not only are there spects the exterior, Grade B. factors. Another in- different colors, and or the shell of the terior quality is the types of eggs, but egg. Typically they Next, egg graders air cells. Typically there are grades as look for things like look at the interior the shallower the air well which say a lot cleanliness, shape, of the egg. To do cells, the higher the about the egg itself. and even the texture this, they candle the grade. The grade classifica- of the shell. If an egg egg which means tion of an egg is al- is not clean, or if it is they hold up the egg So when shopping ways decided based oddly shaped there to the light in order for eggs with perfect on its interior and is a possibility it to test for freshness interior and exterior exterior qualities. won’t pass the grad- and or even fertility. qualities such as un- Most egg grading is ing requirements It can also be done broken shells, clean- done at egg packing necessary for it to with the Haugh unit liness, and yolks that facilities by the Unit- later be packed and system. The Haugh stand high and are ed States Depart- sold. Minor stain- unit system was in- firm, find a Grade ment of Agriculture ing is normal, along vented in 1937 and AA egg and enjoy! (USDA). The facil- with slight misshap- ity, the equipment, ing. The egg should Egg-cellent Jokes sanitation and other be oval-shaped with What is another word for cracking an egg? factors involving the one side slightly An Eggs-ecution packaging are con- larger than the oth- sidered in the grad- How did the police know the egg was guilty? er. As a result, eggs He cracked during interrogation. ing. with stains or slight -Talon Torres April 2016 34 35 April 2016 THE LIGHTNING BOLT

April 2016 36