Gigs NEW VISION,, Friday, August 3, 2012 17 FILM ‘I Love to Hate DJ FAT BOY

ho does not know that Wcocky bulky fella, who thinks he can outreason every one, ranging from his co-presenters on the breakfast show, to the callers. By the way he is a little in shape nowadays and if for some reason you do not know him, I hate you because you do not have swag. Knowing Fat Boy is having swag. He has all the crazy opinions about why relationships are crap and he does not believe in God. He cannot stand Children made in Hollywood these crappy girls and corporate ones, who keep stalking After all those heavy blockbusters     him because he is Fat Boy yet for some reason I am sure he that come with Hollywood’s summer enjoys what they have to off er behind closed doors. season, it is time to sit back and watch  Jennifer Westfeldt, Adam Scott and Maya You bully, why don’t you go celibate and stop whining something silly and funny. Only this fi lm Rudolph about these girls. Just give them what they want and they might not be that silly or funny, after all. give you what you want or leave them to us. The movie is based on the way   Comedy Through his famous blog Free thought Kampala, Fat Boy Hollywood sees marriage and life, which    107 minutes has rubbished everything including religion, witchcraft and is obviously far from even the American the existence of demons. middle class, let alone the Kampalans  R for sexual content, language This very annoying dude, who recently earned a who will go and watch it. Here children   Cineplex philosophy diploma, believes that the entire stuff is creepy are a necessary nuisance, because and thrives on the poverty, desperacy and the need everyone seems to be having them, so   Kalungi Kabuye to escape hopelessness. So he becomes an expert on should others. everything already, how annoying! Julie (Jennifer Westfeldt, who also rearing and the spark of eros do not runs truthfully to what is always the Dude, with human sacrifi ce becoming a norm and people wrote and directed the movie) and Jason seem to co-exist. So, they decide to have ending to movies like these. confessing to have gone under water and had coff ee with (Adam Scott) have been best friends for a child together, share in child rearing, “Friends with Kids is funny and likable,” the devil and Mama Fina dealing with the evil spirits, that years with no romantic interest in each but pursue their own romantic lives. wrote Jason Solomons for the UK stuff is real. other. He sleeps with someone new Things go well until he meets Mary Observer; “ and while the dialogue is Annoying Fat Boy is your typical male chauvinist. Just every few days and she is looking for Mr. Jane (Megan Fox) and she meets often bawdy and sexually frank, its drop a smooth line to Seanice or anybody else and he will Right. Now in their late 30s, they notice Kurt (Edward Burns). Both seem like elements are completely fairy tale, drop ice on it. that their friends seem to lose their good perfect mates. What could go wrong? including a climax involving a cross-town qualities when they have children – child Everything, it turns out and so the plot dash.” COMPILED BY MICHEAL KANAABI     

wo weeks ago, I was gallant guy, saying “… of at a friend’s house for course, I do” while trying to he knew them. That is how he what is called a ‘drink remember if he even knew ended up at our kafunda and Tup’, which others may her. Or wishing somebody told us his story, asking for our call a house party. It was all would come and rescue advice. going on well until this pretty him. Inevitably, that answer Obviously, there is no way to girl came smiling up to me, so is always followed by “Okay, answer that question from a I said “hello”, and she brightly what’s my name?”, Causing woman. One has to take their replied “hello.” the guy to wish Titanic was chances. The best advice came I was wondering where it sinking right there and then. from one guy, who said while was all going when she asked: At least Celine Dion would be the woman is waiting for an “Do you remember me?” singing while he is drowning. answer, call over a friend and I don’t know about the rest For some reason, girls seem hopefully he will introduce of you, but that is one of the to enjoy this because they WHAT’S UP himself to the lady in question, trickiest questions one can will not help you out by in which case she would be be faced with on the social volunteering their names,   forced to introduce herself too. scene. Of course, you want or the circumstances where Hopefully. to be polite and not hurt you might have met. You  In my career as a journalist, I anyone’s feelings as you try end up by humbly asking for have met thousands of people, to search your memory for their help. The kind ones will in Kampala speak. He was and as a fashion photographer, anything that might help you chide you for being forgetful having a blast at the party almost simultaneously after around for a while and then taken millions of pictures of out. But usually, nothing ever and forgive you, but will not when this vaguely familiar that; the smile froze, her decided to go home and tell girls. Inevitably, that “Do you does and it remains a blank. tell you their name; you will girl came smiling to him mouth dropped open and his wife about what a lousy remember me?” question And the person asking the have to fi nd out by yourself. and happily asked: “Do you then closed with an almost evening it had been. comes up more than for normal question, despite it being Apparently, that is the way remember me?” audible clang. Then it opened He had not even stepped folks. But I still haven’t fi gured obvious that you don’t have the game is played. Michael had been married again and did not close for fully indoors when his wife out how to deal with it. the foggiest idea who they Some guys, probably tired for many years and fi gured what seemed an eternity. was all over him; how can So, how did it all end at that are, will not help out. They will of the game, will say outright it was a happy marriage. The woman called Michael he not remember her cousin house party? I was lucky the patiently wait for your answer, “No, I do not remember you, He owned his own fi rm, all kinds of names, least of from abroad, who had hostess came up and said “Rose most times with a smile on where did we meet?” Which which was doing well. He which was that he was not a contributed so handily to (not real name), I see you have their faces. It is even worse if is why I will tell you Michael’s was having a good time, so gentleman; how could he say their wedding? met KK.” So I smiled and said it is a girl, because we do not story, because that is what he he fi gured he did not owe that to a woman, and so on. Apparently, the pissed-off how Rose and I were getting care if a guy’s feelings are hurt did, and is lucky to have lived anybody anything, least of all The noise brought the hostess cousin had called his wife along quite well, before she or not. But a girl?! No guy in to tell the tale. a strange woman trying to to the scene, and when she before he got home. She took Rose away to meet other his right mind will want to One of his buddies was play games with him. So he heard what Michael had done, went on and on till Michael people. But up to today, I don’t deliberately hurt a girl. So, having a birthday party and answered: “No, I do not. Who she turned on him too. was forced to ‘escape’ and really remember where I had what is a guy to do? his wife did not mind him are you?” The poor guy was forced to look for a place, where there met Rose or if I had, in fact, Some try and play the going alone. He got a ‘visa’ Three things happened leave the party. He wandered were no strangers asking if actually met her.