THURSDAY,Campus OCTOBER 29, 2015 / VOLUME 142, ISSUE 19 Times SERVING THE UNIVERSITY OF ROCHESTER COMMUNITY SINCE 1873 / campustimes.org Financial Aid Office moves upstairs in Wallis BY ANNA WANG process will not be completed STAFF WRITER until approximately this Thanksgiving, Financial Aid The Financial Aid Office services will not be interrupted, relocated its reception desk as the front desk is still busy and offices this week from booking interviews. Last year, the basement to the entrance a new student organization, the level of Wallis Hall in order to Peaceful Protest of Financial provide more accessible services Aid, was formed to question the to students and improve the transparency of the Financial Aid efficiency of the office. system. When asked whether the The decision was officially move was intended to respond announced in mid-September, to some of the requests from following Dean of College the student protestors, Burdick Admission and Vice-Provost for explained, “I had offered this Enrollment Initiatives Jonathan move as an example of a reform I’d Burdick’s proposal last summer. be happy to undertake, though The reception desk, previously it wasn’t one that the students located on the basement floor themselves had suggested.”

PARSA LOTFI / PHOTO EDITOR of Wallis Hall, is now housed Burdick also recognized the along with the rest of the proposals that the SA Government The two single-use restrooms on the third floor of Wilson Commons have been relabeled as all-gender restrooms, in response to a resolution passed in February by the Students’ Association. In other buildings on campus, 14 additional restrooms have Financial Aid Office near the and protesters brought up during also been converted. building’s entrance on the a meeting in April this year. Some main floor. Downstairs, the old of the reforms are currently being office remains in use, handling discussed in regular dialogues, behind-the-scenes operations such as an early reminder system All-gender restrooms designated such as publications, systems and for the financial aid package document operations. changes. Some other reforms Burdick pointed out that the take more time to plan and will, throughout River Campus primary reason to move up the according to Burdick, involve reception desk was to provide further conversations. BY PAMELA ORTEGO more visible services and to better Burdick expressed his CONTRIBUTING WRITER With the support of various White shared hope that the greet students. excitement about being able transgender representatives, the administration and Facilities Burdick noted that the new to provide better students. He Since the Students’ two approached SA and met would continue to move forward location would be advantageous added that the move is just one Association (SA) resolution with UR Facilities to discuss with other buildings, especially to new students, who are typically step in a chain of improvements, urging the development of the feasibility of the project. restrooms with showers. As of interested in Financial Aid when and that there is more work to all-gender restrooms across Susan B. Anthony Center now, White is proud of the they come to Rochester, and can be done. the River Campus was passed Coordinator of Outreach John progress that the initiative has now get started all in one place. Wang is a member of on February 2, 2015, 16 Cullen also played a role in made over the course of the year. While the entire moving the class of 2017. restrooms have been converted the formation of the LGBTQ “I think that the willingness to provide single-stall, all- Advocacy Committee, which to change the signs is a powerful gender accessibility. University provided leadership to enhance symbol of affirmation from the Dining forum details Facilities and Services is also the LGBTQ climate at the SA and the administration that continuing to evaluate other University. we, as transgender students, plans for new Douglass single-use type restrooms that As of today, several single- exist on campus, and are worth could be similarly converted in use restrooms have been making the change for,” White BY ANGELA LAI a separate interview, “[The the coming months. renovated, with more still on said. NEWS EDITOR Frederick Douglass Building] Current Junior Stephen the way. Awareness for the The newly converted all- is the only facility that has Wegman, who was then an SA initiative has grown, and the gender restrooms are located UR’s Dining Committee not been renovated or built in Senator, and Take Five Scholar University’s support for the in academic buildings such gave a sneak peek of upcoming the last ten years. So it’s the David Markakis brought the movement has strengthened. as LeChase, Dewey and renovations to the Frederick final piece in a ten-year-long topic before SA after Meliora Markakis emphasized that the Hutchinson Hall. They can also Douglass Building on Tuesday, renovation program.” Weekend in 2014, with the goal, however, is not to make be found in student residence Oct. 27, focusing on the major “In addition to that,” he said, goal of creating more inclusive bathrooms that are exclusively halls throughout River Campus, changes coming to Douglass “it gives us space on this side campus environment where for transgender and non-binary including Gilbert and Hoeing, Dining Center. The current of campus that’s more modern, students of all gender identities people, but to make spaces that the University Health Service plan is to close the building more functional, and space have access to safe restrooms. are safe and accommodating Building, Spurrier Hall, Todd on May 1 and reopen it in late that we can control completely Inspired by Laverne Cox, who for everyone. Markakis noted Union and Wilson Commons. August or early September of in ways that will allow us to was one of the speakers during that the initiative is not about “Everyone deserves to be 2016, with the tentative goal of play with different kinds of Meliora Weekend, Wegman preferential treatment, but safe in their personal identity,” completing renovations before programming.” and Markakis collaborated instead a cause for social Wegman said. “It’s all about the beginning of the 2016-2017 The third and fourth floors to write a resolution for equality. safety, inclusion and Meliora.” school year. of the Frederick Douglass the implementation of all- Some students have lauded Ortego is a member of Director of Dining Services Building will house the gender restrooms on campus. the change. Junior Alex the class of 2019. Cam Schauf explained in SEE DOUGLASS PAGE 4 INSIDE ENERGY, LUNCH MEATS THE PASSING OF A MASS, LIGHT AND CANCER LEGEND THIS CT The Opposite of People New research linking processed In memory of the tremendous (TOOP)’s most recent show meats won’t cause a rise in impact the legendary coach features the adventures of a vegetarianism, but it is an Flip Saunders made on the time travelling Victorian woman. opportunity to rethink our health game of basketball. choices.

EMMA GUILFOYLE / CONTRIBUTING ILLUSTRATOR PAGE 11 A&E PAGE 5 OPINIONS PAGE 14 SPORTS PAGE 2 / campustimes.org NEWS / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 WEEKEND FORECAST COURTESY OF WEATHER.COM

FRIDAY SATURDAY SUNDAY

AM Clouds/PM Sun Mostly Cloudy Showers High 47, Low 33 High 54, Low 44 High 57, Low 43 Chance of rain: 20% Chance of rain: 00% Chance of rain: 80%

PUBLIC SAFETY UPDATE Injured deer runs into Emergency Department

PARSA LOTFI / PHOTO EDITOR BY ANGELA LAI NEILLY LECTURE SERIES FEATURES ALLEN KURZWEIL NEWS EDITOR from UR property. He was Allen Kurzweil, the author of the book “Whipping Boy,” gave a lecture in the Hawkins-Carlson Room of Rush Rhees 1. On Oct. 26 at 3:54 p.m., then placed under arrest for Library at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, Oct. 28. a deer was struck by a vehicle trespassing. The male was then on Elmwood Avenue after taken to DPS Headquarters for jumping over the fence from processing, and the Rochester THIS WEEK ON CAMPUS the Mt. Hope Cemetery. Police Department (RPD) After being struck by the car, responded and transported THURSDAY the injured deer ran into the him to Monroe County Jail. OCTOBER 29 Emergency Department (ED) INTERNATIONAL HALLOWEEN CONVERSATIONS ON RACE front loop. The deer was then Male attempts to return WILSON COMMONS BRIDGE LOUNGE, 5:00 P.M. - 7:00 P.M. SUSAN B. ANTHONY FRIEL LOUNGE, 7:30 P.M. - 9:30 P.M. able to run into the ambulance stolen textbook Enjoy Halloween activities from around the world, with The University community is invited to participate doors that were open from activities including pumpkin decorating and making in two two-hour conversations on race and poverty when a patient was brought 3. On Oct. 26 at 1:26 p.m., a your own skull mask. This event is sponsored by starting this week. The second event is planned for into the hospital. The deer DPS officer was at the College CCAS and International Student Mentors. 7 p.m. on Thursday, Nov. 5. made it a short distance inside Town Barnes & Noble taking the ED. DPS officers and staff a report for a male that took FRIDAY were able to secure the deer OCTOBER 30 a textbook earlier in the day. and take it back outside on Staff reported that a male ANNUAL SCARE FAIR DRAG OF THE DEAD RUSH RHEES LIBRARY, 1:30 P.M. TO 6:00 P.M. WILSON COMMONS MAY ROOM, 8:00 P.M. - 10:00 P.M. a hospital bed. The deer was had just entered the store The annual River Campus Libraries’ Scare Fair will Pride Network presents “Drag of the Dead.” Join taken across the street by DPS and wanted to return a book be held from 1:30 to 4:30 p.m. This year’s theme them for their annual fall drag show featuring and Monroe County Sheriff’s that matched what was taken is Classic Horror films. The films from the library’s performasnces by local professional deputies, who were in the ED earlier. Staff confirmed that the collection will be projected during the event. drag queens and kings. on an unrelated call. Once in book was from College Town, the cemetery, it was determined as it still had the tags on it. The that the deer’s injuries were too SATURDAY male stated that a friend asked OCTOBER 31 severe, and it was put down him to return the book, and DAY OF THE DEAD CELEBRATION HALLOWEEN HARVEST AND DOG PARADE by one of the deputies. No that the friend told him his WILSON COMMONS HIRST LOUNGE, 2:00 P.M. - 5:00 P.M. COLLEGE TOWN, NOON - 4:00 P.M. one was injured inside the ED mother bought the book at a Learn all about the Day of the Dead celebration in Celebrate Halloween at College Town with trick-or- when the deer ran inside. nearby Barnes and Noble. The different countries. Make arts and crafts, and discover treating, Halloween activites, fire pits, cider, donuts, male described his friend and it traditions in Latin countries. This event is sponsored tastings and a costume contest. Man arrested at matched the description of the by the Spanish and Latino Students’ Association. Fauver Stadium male that took the book earlier. DPS officers tried to arrest the SUNDAY 2. On Oct. 24 at 1:27 p.m., male for possession of stolen NOVEMBER 1 a Department of Public Safety property when he tried to run VARSITY WOMEN’S SOCCER V. BRANDEIS GOSPEL CHOIR CONCERT (DPS) officer observed a male out of the store. The male was FAUVER STADIUM, 11:00 A.M. - 1:00 P.M. STRONG AUDITORIUM, 8:00 P.M. - 10:00 P.M. acting strangely inside Fauver ground subdued and placed in Come support UR’s varsity women’s soccer team as Come see UR’s Gospel Choir, along with guest Stadium. The male, who was handcuffs. RPD was contacted they play against the team from Brandeis University. Gospel Choirs from SUNY Geneseo, SUNY Brockport in the stadium watching the to transport the male to the and RIT. The concert is free and open to the public. football game, was asked Monroe County Jail. At press to step out and speak with time, the other male had not the officers. The male was been located. If you are sponsoring an event that you wish to submit for the calendar, please email [email protected] cooperative and did so without Lai is a member of by Monday evening with a brief summary, including: the date, time, location, sponsor and cost of admission. incident. A check of the the class of 2018. male’s name determined that Information provided by Campus Times he had been recently banned UR Public Safety. SERVING THE UNIVERSITY OF ROCHESTER COMMUNITY SINCE 1873 Wilson Commons 102 University of Rochester, Rochester, NY 14627 Office: (585) 275-5942 / Fax: (585) 273-5303 campustimes.org / [email protected] EDITOR-IN-CHIEF AARON SCHAFFER MANAGING EDITOR JULIANNE McADAMS

NEWS EDITORS ANGELA LAI HUMOR EDITORS ERIK CHIODO SAM PASSANISI NATE KUHRT FEATURES EDITORS RAAGA KANAKAM SPORTS EDITORS DANI DOUGLAS TANIMA PODDAR MAX EBER OPINIONS EDITOR JUSTIN TROMBLY PHOTO EDITOR PARSA LOTFI A&E EDITORS JEFFREY HOWARD ILLUSTRATOR CHRISTIAN CIERI AUREK RANSOM ONLINE EDITOR JUSTIN FRAUMENI COPY EDITOR SCOTT ABRAMS

PUBLISHER ANGELA REMUS

Full responsibility for material appearing in this publication rests with the Editor-in-Chief. Opinions expressed in columns, letters, op-eds or comics are not necessarily the views of the editors or the University of Rochester. Campus Times is printed weekly on Thursdays throughout the academic year, except around and during University holidays. All issues are free. Campus Times is published on the World Wide Web at www.campustimes.org and is updated Thursdays following publication. Campus Times is SA funded. All materials herein are copyright © 2015 by Campus Times.

It is our policy to correct all erroneous information as quickly as possible. If you believe you have a correction, please email [email protected]. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / NEWS campustimes.org / PAGE 3 Bernie Sanders National Student Town Hall live streamed on campus BY AMANDA MARQUEZ group University of Rochester and tuition reform are perhaps CONTRIBUTING WRITER Students for Bernie Sanders, the most pertinent to students. On Oct. 28 at 7 p.m., senator coordinated the on-campus Sanders acknowledged the from the state of Vermont and livestream viewing held in increasing expenses of a college presidential candidate Bernie Goergen Hall. While they are education and stated that a college Sanders held a National Student not an SA-recognized group, diploma is the equivalent of what Town Hall meeting at the University of Rochester Students a high school diploma was 50 Recreation & Athletic Complex for Bernie Sanders advocates for years ago­—extremely necessary of George Mason University in the Sanders campaign and aims for future employment. He went Fairfax, Virginia. Hundreds of to raise political awareness on on to state that all public colleges students flooded the complex to campus. In the past, they have and universities should be tuition listen to Sanders speak and show hosted events in conjunction with free in order to be an attainable their support for his campaign. other groups, including the UR goal for all students. At the Students from all over the country College Democrats. The two- conclusion of his speech, Sanders also showed their support by hour-long event had a turnout of urged all students to “not fall into tuning into the event via a live roughly a dozen students, all of the trap of thinking small.” He stream. Over 300 campuses whom actively watched Sanders then opened the floor to questions nationwide hosted events to speak. from both students present at the stream the meeting, UR among During the meeting Sanders event and those tweeting under PARSA LOTFI / PHOTO EDITOR them. touched upon the major reforms the hashtag #StudentsForBernie. UR students watch the live stream of Bernie Sanders’ National Student Town Hall, Junior Katie Hallagan, a he’d like to see, if he is elected Marquez is a member of which took place Wednesday, Oct. 29 at 7 p.m. member of the independent into office. His ideas for education the class of 2017. Warner School to train teachers in city schools with $2 million grant BY SAM PASSANISI NEWS EDITOR school tuition as they take on leadership and coaching roles The Warner School of at other schools. Education has received $2 This grant, titled “Leveraging million in grant funding from Unique Opportunities to the National Science Foundation Develop STEM Teacher Leaders (NSF) to further the Warner for Urban Schools” represents School’s work in improving Phase II of the Warner School’s science and math education initiative. In this phase, the in urban high schools. The project’s reach will extend grant will be used primarily beyond Rochester City School to fund the Warner School’s District (RCSD) to encompass urban science, technology, high schools in Geneva City Valid through December 31, 2015 engineering and math (STEM) School District and Newark education initiative, the UR City School District, located in neighboring Ontario and Wayne counties, respectively. ‘Our goal is to develop Phase I of the project, which received a $3 million grant from high-quality math the NSF and took place from 2010 and science teachers,’ to 2015, funded a team of teachers drawn from different schools in Associate Professor RCSD. Callard noted that in d Phase II, Warner School officials Winter net at the Warner School will be seeking out a group of 14- Cynthia Callard 16 teachers from the former East The Coolest Season at SUNY Ulster High Schools and from Nathaniel said. [...] The project Rochester Community School 3. earn 3 Credits in 3 Weeks! Online COurses* involves selecting These teachers will then become “master teachers” and “teacher • Reduce your Spring course load Computer AppliCAtions in Business leaders” at schools in the other teachers from urban Business lAw i & ii districts. • Complete a required course schools and providing “We’ve been working • Credits transfer back to intro to mACroeConomiCs significantly with School 3 [...] wwestern CivilizAtion i them with academic and they’ve been working toward your own school support [...] becoming a STEM school,” AnCient rome Callard added. Low $95 informAtioninform literACy Robert Noyce Master Teaching She also noted that the Phase December 26 to per credit GenerGenerAl psyCholoGy Fellows Program, which provides II of the grant is a rare and tuition stipends and graduate school much-appreciated opportunity eelementAry spAnish ii tuition for high school teachers for the Warner School, in January 16, 2016 iintermediAtentermedi spAnish i in the program. that they will be able to apply “Our goal is to develop their findings from Phase I to Y*Online courses cost an additional high-quality math and science other high schools in the other Register by December 18 teachers,” Associate Professor district. $10 per credit. at the Warner School Cynthia Callard’s co-investigators on Callard said. Callard is also the project are professor of the executive director of Mathematics Carl Mueller; and Warner’s Center for Professional Dean of Graduate Studies Wendi Registration is Easy! Development & Education Heinzelman, who is professor Reform and the lead researcher of Electrical & Computer Find the course you need at on the project. The central idea Engineering. The Rochester www.sunyulster.edu/winternet of the project involves selecting Museum and Science Center is teachers from urban schools and a partner in the research. Call 1-800-724-0833 x5075 providing them with academic Passanisi is a member of Email [email protected] Start Here. Go Far. support, a stipend and graduate the class of 2017.

Univ. of Rochester 6.12” x 7” PAGE 4 / campustimes.org NEWS / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 Dining unveils floor plans, stations for new Douglass

DOUGLASS FROM PAGE 1 which will no longer be meant to have an international Paul Burgett Intercultural accessible from the patio linking flair and will rotate between Center and the Language Douglass to Wilson Commons, offerings like sushi, noodle Center. On the second floor, will house the new dining center bowls, banh mi and char siu; where the dining center is and a late-night retail location. Korean BBQ and Korean currently located, the balcony This retail location can be hot pot; Indian food; South will come down, creating a opened separately from the dining American food; and foods large, open space which can center, with a quarter window like poutine, pickled salads, be sectioned into three rooms that directly accesses the station fried macaroni and cheese by using new moveable walls. where the food will be prepared. and grilled cheese. At the Those rooms will be available While the retail location probably European/exhibition pasta will not have a set menu until station, diners can get omelets The first floor of December, Schauf said that it will the building, which use grills and fryers to prepare In addition to some of its items. will no longer be There will be seats in the retail moving down a floor, area for 60 people, as well as two [Douglass] will now accessible from attached rooms which can be the patio linking opened up. The fireplace from the feature a micro- old bookstore will be incorporated Douglass to Wilson into the space. restaurant style. Douglass faces a major IMAGE COURTESY OF UR DINING Commons, will house overhaul. In addition to moving The floor plan for the renovated first floor of the Frederick Douglass Building was the new dining center down a floor, it will now feature for breakfast, and, later, can unveiled on Tuesday night in a Dining Forum open to the student body. a micro-restaurant style. Diners get foods like crepes, antipasto, and a late-night will be able to get a full meal at salad, flatbread and pizza. The each station or, if they choose, allergen-free zone will focus retail location. will be able to mix and match on healthy, local foods, and portions from each station. The will offer items without milk, to reserve 24/7. eggs, peanuts, tree nuts, fish, The second floor will also micro-restaurant solution will offer kosher, street, European, shellfish, soy and wheat, as house Grab n’ Go and its well as made-to-order items. attached kitchen. During allergen-free and dessert food stations. Though the allergen-free and the presentation, Schauf said kosher zone will always offer that the plan was for UR to The kosher/comfort station will have kosher supervision their own dessert options, eventually start making all there will also be a desserts of its Grab & Go offerings during all hours of operation and will offer house meats, station offering a coffee shop on its own, allowing Dining style bakery, ice cream and a to respond more quickly to house pickling, fresh breads, roasted proteins, smoked meats, waffle bar. student demand. Lai is a member of The first floor of the building, composed salads, soups and more. The street station is the class of 2018. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / FEATURES campustimes.org / PAGE 5 OPINIONS EDITORIAL OBSERVER EDITORIAL BOARD We welcome Provost Clark The red meat Change hangs heavy in the was carried out under Clark. preexisting humanities programs, brisk Rochester air. UR’s top Research opportunities for but developing them alongside question administration has experienced undergraduate engineers the STEM programs that have significant changes since the have proliferated. Enrollment burgeoned under his leadership. beginning of the semester, of aspiring engineers in the Humanistic inquiry is strong discussion. The WHO has including the appointment of Hajim School has skyrocketed, at UR, and we believe Clark created an opportunity—and Robert Clark, Dean of Hajim doubling since his appointment recognizes that. In his speech an incentive—for individuals to School of Engineering and to the deanship in 2008. following the announcement reevaluate their lifestyles. Applied Sciences and Senior Vice In the role of University of his appointment as provost, Compared with the risks President for Research, to the Provost, a position focused Clark cited his own investment associated with smoking and position of University Provost. primarily on academics and in the humanities not only as alcohol consumption, the Clark will be the University’s research, we expect Dean Clark a musician but as an engineer, “dangers” of red and processed 10th provost, replacing current to shine. searching for ways to interweave meat are relatively low. It is provost Peter Lennie. With his roaring successes the humanities with the difficult to isolate—in any We are excited to see Dean BY DANI DOUGLAS in the science, technology, sciences. study—one particular cause of a Clark fill this role. Under his engineering and math (STEM) UR, particularly through its SPORTS EDITOR disease. There are an enormous leadership, the Hajim School domain, we were interested in new Humanities Center and number of variables that could has evolved into an academic how Clark would address the digital humanities initiatives, Are we on the verge be considered. Individuals who powerhouse, with new and more humanities and social sciences. has worked to couple these two of a worldwide spike in eat large quantities of bacon rigorous programs. We believe that he will rise to ordinarily disparate areas of vegetarianism? and hot dogs are also more Integration of Computer the challenge: the challenge of not study. We look forward to seeing Earlier this week, the World likely to be those who live less Science into the Hajim School only preserving the University’s what comes of this marriage. Health Organization (WHO)’s healthy lifestyles. These may be The above editorial is published with the consent of a majority of the editorial board: Aaron Schaffer (Editor-in- International Agency for the people who get inadequate Chief), Julianne McAdams (Managing Editor), Justin Trombly (Opinions Editor), Aurek Ransom (A&E Editor) and Research on Cancer (IARC) amounts of exercise and make Raaga Kanakam (Features Editor). The Editor-in-Chief and the Editorial Board make themselves available to the warned that consuming certain poor nutrition decisions in UR community’s ideas and concerns. Email [email protected]. types of meats may lead to general. EDITORIAL OBSERVER increased rates of cancers—in But, the goal of the study particular, colon cancer. After is not to persuade the global reviewing over 800 studies, public to eliminate red meat Hold off on your post-mortem the WHO determined that entirely or to become vegetarian. science. Together, they harmonize. must not only come up with the red meats like beef and lamb The scientists behind the work Their separation begets dissonance. answers, but the questions, too. We are “probably carcinogenic understand that red meat does Science is the framework for all that can more accurately assess today in to humans,” while processed contain important nutrients we know how to do, and it allows terms of the past. The United States’ meats, such as bacon and and proteins. The reason that us to move toward something. The immigration restrictions in the late sausage, have shown “strong the IARC report has struck a humanities allow us to conceive ‘30s and early ‘40s, for instance, mechanistic evidence” for chord with so many around the of that something. If science and left many Jews fleeing Europe with causing cancers. world is that red meat, for many, technology are the skeleton, the little recourse. Our modern policy The language used by the is an important part of both humanities are the flesh, organs, dilemmas—the Syrian refugee organization is somewhat diet and culture, and it is not crisis, say—can be informed by our BY AUREK RANSOM tendons, nerves and skin—all­ that vague, but the moment that an something that everyone wants senses, feels, aches, lives. previous ones. If we are not students esteemed health organization to give up. The uncertainty of A&E EDITOR This is especially true now, in of history, we are mere bystanders, The red meat- how much risk exists, and the Decades from now, a student the dawn of the digital humanities. doomed to neither learn from past identification of the slightest might glance at her course syllabus Humanistic study is bolstered mistakes nor let others learn from cancer correlation correlation between processed and see our generation, the early by today’s technology: computer ours. meats and cancer, is what is 2000s, listed as an area of study. programs can analyze text, A common rebuke of the [...] shouldn’t be causing the situation to escalate We could be the focus because of identify style and understand humanities is that the courses interpreted as an in the media. our generation’s historical merit: our language; studies show us how offered in them are easier and, This said, it is unlikely that we intrinsic interestingness, perhaps, our brain treats activities—reading by extension, not as worthwhile opportunity to instill will see an increase in the number or our events—migrations, a book, for instance—and how or information-dense as science, of those who remove meat from movements, each taking years to we can use that information to technology, engineering and math fear [...] but rather their diet. A Gallup survey manifest, all the way down to the enhance our experience; and (STEM) courses. (Though, if true, as an opportunity to of eating preferences found minutiae of days, hours, minutes, media proliferates itself around I hardly see why that is a reason that five percent of Americans seconds. We might live between us, changing the way that we to ignore them.) I wholeheartedly encourage healthy identify as vegetarians, two dates, bookended by more receive and process information. disagree. I think it is the case that, compared to six percent of the significant events, but still be present Likewise, our understanding in the humanities, you’re less likely dietary choices. American population in 1999 and very much accounted for. of—and apprehension about— to be “wrong”—there seldom and 2001. In 2004, the U.S. Or, she might not. We might be modern science is made richer by is a “wrong.” Paramount in the invokes the word “cancer” as Food and Drug Administration swallowed up by a more compelling the humanities. They guide the humanities is a critical thought a consequence, it is more than and the Environmental Protection time period. We might be a mere questions of what to make of a process, not a search for a single likely that people around the Agency warned of the effects footnote on the flank of the 21st world with self-driving cars and “correct” answer. In this way, the world will be put on edge. of consuming tuna fish because century. We might even—perish hyper-intelligent computers. humanities can be more dynamic Already, the North American of the presence of mercury, the thought—be ignored altogether. But, this attempt to preserve the than STEM disciplines: the door is Meat Institute has responded and, although consumption There’s a disquieting notion: we humanities is the initiative of the never closed to new interpretation. by criticizing the organization’s decreased, we haven’t seen tuna might not be remembered by our few. What scares me is the mood The humanities are not dead. claims, stating, “The IARC says entirely disappear from the ancestors in the same way that we of the many. There is popular tepid Their preservation, however, you can enjoy your yoga class, American diets. Both cases show remember or study our past. support to keep the humanities requires more than feeble but don’t breath the air”— that often, this sort of behavior How could this be? With our around that does, in my view, more commiseration. We need to throw referring to the vast number of remains relatively static over technology, our science, surely harm than good. This commitment ourselves into the humanities and factors that are argued to lead time. we will have left an indelible manifests itself in the student who allow ourselves to experience all that to cancer. Christian Schmidt, Although I myself am a mark on history. Perhaps that’s says, “Yeah, the humanities are it can provide. We should not allow the German Minister of Food vegetarian, I am not advocating just the issue: our parochial and, good,” but makes little or no effort ourselves to be passed over because and Agriculture, encouraged for the end of all red and processed increasingly, pernicious focus on to study them. We grow indifferent we, in our apathy toward the culture people not to “be afraid if they meat consumption­—nor do I scientific advancement has clouded by virtue of everyone weakly of the past, were unable to generate eat a bratwurst every now and think that this imminently in our vision. Vocational science declaring their support. a culture of our own. Eschew the then.” PETA has even taken our future. The red meat-cancer and technology are hogging our A student should have the insular STEM-centric ideology that the opportunity to promote correlation, however strong or intellectual processing power, and desire and the freedom to explore pervades us—study STEM, and vegetarianism and veganism by weak, shouldn’t be interpreted there is a distinct lack of effort— the humanities on his or her more. If we don’t, we’ll be little more offering “free starter kits.” as an opportunity to instill fear and motivation—to do something own. With the humanities, we than an itemized list of scientific Even if there is only shown and worry in the public about about it. Blindly marching toward a can use the experiences of others accomplishments, shunted to the to be a small increase in the the inherent doom of disease, future of yet-unconceived scientific to understand ourselves. We are dustbin of history with a ribbon rate of cancers, both the but rather as an opportunity marvels hollows us and leaves exposed to new ways of thinking, that reads “Participant,” and skepticism of dissidents and to encourage healthy dietary us without a spirit, an ideal, a creating and exploring. Writing a nothing else. the applause of supporters choices. humanistic desire—a culture. paper, for example, is a different Ransom is a member of bring the topic of nutrition to Douglas is a member of Humanities are counterpoint to kind of inquiry, one where you the class of 2017. the forefront of international the class of 2017. PAGE 6 / campustimes.org OPINIONS / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 ‘NO COMMENT’ OP-ED Keep speech The state of the free Republican Party against “judging an entire BY WILLIAM SEHNERT RealClearPolitics, Congress Planned Parenthood videos profession off the actions of has a 78.7 percent disapproval she still claims exist. Fiorina a few members,” he does the On Oct. 28, the Republican rating. The House Freedom has declined in the polls same to BLM, writing that if Party finally nominated Rep. Caucus has responded by because of the same reason “vilification and denigration Paul Ryan to be the Speaker moving even further to Clintonwouldn’t make a good of the police force continues of the House. This came the right, polarizing the president. Each have weak to be a significant portion of after Rep. John Boehner’s Republican Party. policy positions and feed Black Lives Matter’s message, resignation from the position Anyone with even the most off of others’ mistakes and then I will not support the in September, following BY JESSE BERNSTEIN rudimentary knowledge of personal flaws. Fiorina only movement.” That is quite pressures from numerous politics should be able to climbed in the polls because COLUMNIST emphatically not central to political factions within the analyze this situation and she successfully attacked On Sept. 14, Bryan what BLM stands for, and understand that the American Stascavage, a student at while there are certainly valid As a Republican, I people do not want more of Ryan is above this Wesleyan University, published criticisms to be made of some something they dislike. The an op-ed in the student the group’s tactics and policies, write this mostly in vast support for a government onerous behavior, newspaper, the Argus. Thethis one is a bit off-base. distress because of shutdown manifested by the article, titled “Why Black Lives In the wake of recent events, first Republican debate about and I believe he Matter Isn’t What You Think,” Stascavage has decried the the way the GOP has Planned Parenthood amazes has the power to was a relatively mild criticism “disease” of “Social Justice me. It is as if Republicans of the Black Lives Matter Warriors.” I assume he’s driven its reputation, can’t grasp that the American pass conservative (BLM) movement, stating that referring to, oh, people who along with that of people prefer bipartisanship Stascavage felt he could not feel as if they’re witnessing an over polarization and lacking bills that facilitate back a movement that he saw injustice and then deciding Congress, into the productivity. productive solutions. as being anti-police. He wrote to do something about it, Ryan is above this onerous that he believed BLM shouldn’t in which case he’s a fool. ground. Although behavior, and I believe he has By demanding be judged based on the actions Attacking people for having much damage has the power to pass conservative support from the of a few, just as conservatives the gall to stand up for what bills that facilitate productive shouldn’t be blanket-labeled they believe in is just plain been done to the solutions. By demanding numerous factions as “homophobic” because of silly, but that doesn’t absolve support from the numerous one country clerk in Kentucky. those who stand from any and Party, I think— factions within the Republican within the Republican Within a day of publication, all critical evaluation. to use President Party, he is taking a step Party, he is taking a Stascavage was being threatened At a liberal arts institution, toward unifying Republicans online, copies of the Argus students are supposedly taught Obama’s campaign to provide solutions, rather step toward unifuing were being stolen and burned to engage with ideas that than to compete to see who by BLM activistss and national may seem repulsive to them. slogan—there is hope. can be the least liberal. Republicans to media picked up the story. The students who believed Although Ryan will better provide solutions, The Argus editorial boardthe Argus to be implicitly party. It took Paul Ryan quite the name of the Republican apologized for publishing the supporting racism by publishing some time to acknowledge Party, the next president needs rather than to piece the next day, writing that Stascavage’s article believed that he is the best man for to be able to follow through though they acknowledged the that they were being denied the job. Ryan’s conditions with comprehensive policy compete to see who importance of having difficult a voice—that the inclusion regarding his acceptance that is economically efficient. can be the least or controversial opinions of a voice they judged to be of the position evince a Right now, Republican published on campus, they repulsive warranted burning maturity and understanding presidential candidate Ben liberal. believed Stascavage’s article and stealing newspapers and of the current state of the “cites inaccurate statistics and then dramatically reducing the Republican party that most Anyone with even the other candidates. I hope her twists facts,” though nothing budget of the newspaper. This of his fellow Republican peers decline is because Republicans specific was detailed. A few is no less narrow-minded an have failed to recognize. most rudimentary understand that policy is the weeks after the incident, the attempt to stifle discourse than Progressives like President most important aspect of a Wesleyan Student Association far-right conservatives who Obama and former Secretary knowledge of politics candidate, not how skillfully voted to re-allocate a large stomped on “Rubber Soul” or of State Hillary Clinton should be able to they can trash talk. portion of the Argus’ funds burned “Das Kapital” in this promote policies intended As a Republican, I write this towards 20 work-study positions country. Think about how to boost those with a analyze this situation mostly in distress because of to be distributed among all of ridiculous those people look lower socioeconomic status the way the GOP has driven the campus publications. now. while promoting equality and understand that its reputation, along with Free speech is a tricky I don’t at all intend to tell throughout the nation. These the American people that of Congress, into the thing that few people seem people how to behave. There progressive policies frequently ground. Although, in the eyes to understand. Any blogger is, of course, much to be said have adverse side effects. do not want more of the American people, much or writer who’s been asked to for pursuing justice outside Republicans would most of something they damage has been done to the take something down will cry what popular society deems likely not support these types Party, I think—to use the that they’re being censored, “appropriate.” Anyone who’s ever of bills, which is perfectly dislike. President Obama’s campaign perhaps not realizing that the had a gripe with the government reasonable. What is not slogan—there is hope. First Amendment only applies could tell you that you can only reasonable is providing no Carson and—as I am sure Senator Marco Rubio is to government censorship. If write so many letters to your alternatives. The Republican you all have heard—his peer the greatest ray of hope for the Campus Times found my Congressional representative Party, as a result, has earned Donald Trump lead in most the Republican Party. He is articles to be blatantly racist, before you throw your hands itself the reputation of the recent polls. A neurosurgeon progressive in the sense that misogynist, xenophobic, up in disgust. Some of the “no” party. and a television personality/ he is a policy promoter, as classist, etc., then they would most effective and important I think the most significant business leader, neither of opposed to just a pure anti- have no responsibility to civil rights campaigns in this implication of Paul Ryan’s whom have any previous liberal. I think that he can publish them. There’s a line country’s history owe a great new, powerful position is political experience, are work in tandem with Ryan between discourse on an deal of their popular support to the transition “from being the current Republican to change the face of the exceptionally polarizing topic sit-ins, bus boycotts and protests an opposition party to a frontrunners. Ben Carson: the Republican Party from that of and purposefully inflammatory that pushed lines of perceived proposition party,” as Ryan soft-spoken orator who has a an old, white, rich man who material, and it’s up to the propriety. himself said; however, his charisma of divinity. The enjoys allowing monopolies editors’ discretion to decide However, that comes with a other required concessions man who said he could not see and exploiting the working where exactly it lies. Opinions caveat. The inclusion of a new voice are also intelligent. Among a Muslim being President of class in his free time. aren’t free from scrutiny, which cannot and should not come at the other factions within the the United States. If Carson As long as Paul Ryan follows is why debate exists. expense of another, because that’s Party, the House Freedom himself is so ignorant as to say through with his intentions Go and read Stascavage’s not discourse. That’s monologue. Caucus divides and impedes this, do Republicans have any and wins over difficult article. It does, indeed, tend What makes an effective group is the Party’s success most hope? All of the candidates conservatives, and Marco to paint with a broad brush that they don’t just talk amongst significantly. The group has who have no previous Rubio is the commander-in- and make a few unwarranted themselves—they get everyone ousted Speaker John Boehner political experience have chief of America in just over a assumptions; in other words, talking. Otherwise, they’re just and prevented Representative been manifestly incompetent year, the Republican Party has it’s a fairly standard campus another voice screaming aimlessly Kevin McCarthy from in playing politics. Fiorina, a chance of escaping the hole op-ed. I happen to disagree into the Internet abyss. nomination, arguing for largely considered the biggest it has dug itself into. with Stascavage—just a Bernstein is a member of stronger conservatism. From winner of the first GOP Sehnert is a member of few lines after he warns the class of 2018. recent polling data from debate, overtly lied about the class of 2019. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / FEATURES campustimes.org / PAGE 7 FEATURES ‘Pizza Prty’: Grab yourself a slice and tune on in BY JUSTIN TROMBLY On the desk inside the studio between their individual styles. listening,” Kashket says. people told me they’d listen OPINIONS EDITOR sits a sleek grey soundboard, Though their tastes are both “That’s the beauty about that,” tonight. This is the worst!” which Taschman is manning rooted in indie, “hipster” from Taschman. She leaves to try to find “We’ve got like two and a half tonight, fading songs out and music, there are some slight “Of radio,” Kaskhet returns. someone to fix the issue, and minutes, Toby,” Carrie Taschman switching others on; it looks like differences—Taschman’s songs “You don’t know your when she comes back through the says. Toby Kashket croaks in something out of science fiction— are sadder, generally, Kashket’s audience,” Taschman says. “You studio door, her partner suddenly response. buttons, sliding switches, green happier. can’t see them.” realizes they’re wearing matching It’s a Thursday, almost 8 p.m., bars bouncing on screens—and Beneath the music, the Later, Taschman takes the black and white outfits—“Oh and the two sophomores are controls almost all the functions atmosphere in the studio shifts concept a bit further, saying, “I my god, Carrie,” she laughs. stationed around a horseshoe- of the show: volumes, transitions from silent scrolling on phones like to joke that we’re forming Taschman and Kashket deejay shaped desk littered with CDs and the like. Behind the desk, a and laptops to laughter-filled a collective conscious.” She asks not just because they love music, and papers. Taschman, standing window looking into an adjacent reminiscing on past episodes. Kashket what she’ll do without but because they love sharing on the inside of the counter, is studio stretches across the wall, a Every so often, one of them her, if she studies abroad. “Slowly it with others, too, even if they rifling through a pile of discs. holiday garland draped above it. whispers a reminder about how die in the studio,” Kashket replies. think their audience is mostly just Seated on the outside of the A few albums and posters look much time is left until they need Early on in the night, as one their parents and truck drivers counter, Kashket is typing on down from their perches above. to sit up, pull their mikes close of their first songs hushes to who’ve randomly happened upon her Macbook. Both are in a quiet “They watch over us and give and talk for on-air bits between a murmur, the two outline a their station. “It’s a way for me to hurry, behind schedule. us strength,” Kashket deadpans, songs. They talk for around six manifesto of sorts. force people to listen to the music “Shoot, I don’t even know if I going on to name a litany of minutes per broadcast, and their “My favorite thing about Toby that I like, rather than stealing remember how to do board, yo,” other trinkets found around exchanges feature commentary and I is that girls in radio aren’t as the aux cord in my friends’ cars,” Taschman says. “You got it, you the office: a figurine made of on music, current events, fun common as guys are, and when Taschman quips in explanation. get right back into it,” Kashket seashells, school photos featuring facts about popular musicians and you have two [similar]-looking, Kashket emphasizes how’ve replies. More shuffling—papers, faces no one knows, a seemingly scores of little laughs and knowing short [sophomores] who run a they’ve benefited from this CDs. Kashket’s keyboard clacks. random biography of rapper glances—the physical hints of show together and are also the exchange, too, saying they’ve “It’s the most nerve-wracking T.I. The office is a labyrinth of a kind of running meta-gag. same e-board position, I have this “broadened each other’s part,” Taschman says, drumming rooms, hallways and closets, “We like to think we’re funny,” theory that no one knows the horizons” and introduced each her fingers, now waiting on the filled with loose cables, on-air Kashket confesses. Foot taps, desk difference between us,” Taschman other to artists they would have edge of a rolling chair. She and signs and CDs—boxes, shelves, drumming and head nods all says, as acoustic guitars begin to never found otherwise. It’s also her partner are both poised before piles of CDs. And, though they punctuate their musical debates. strum. exciting, Taschman adds, when craning microphones, silent. broadcast from these cramped Taschman and Kashket’s main “Basically,” Kashket says in people they don’t know approach A button clicks. “You are bunker quarters, Taschman and objective as music directors is to turn, “our plan is to keep moving them with compliments about listening to 88.5 FM, WRUR- Kashket can reach listeners miles judge how appropriate the music up the ranks and be co-general their show. Interactions like this FM,” comes Taschman’s voice. She and miles away. the station receives every week managers, never do a job by soothe any worries that radio reads from a scripted introduction “Pizza Prty” began in January; from promoters is and whether it ourselves.” might die out on campus. “I on paper. Acoustic guitars and it takes its name from a song by meets their standards for “good” “Why bother, you know,” think people are always going to tambourines ring out from the L’Homme Run, a defunct rap music. Anything offensive or low Taschman concludes, returning think it’s cool,” Taschman says. speakers fastened above them. group fronted by indie rocker Ezra quality is tossed aside; the rest to her CDs as the song crescendos As the show’s second-to-last Their FM radio show has begun. Koenig, who is the lead singer of is reviewed, ordered and sorted and the singer croons, “We all are song ends, Kashket fades the WRUR is UR’s student-run Vampire Weekend, a band both somewhere among the legions your friends.” music out and hits a button on radio and television station. It Taschman and Kashmet adore. of CDs around the office. They The next Thursday evening the soundboard. Click. “You’re operates in partnership with The two had each hosted online hadn’t originally planned to work in the studio, seven neat stacks listening to the ‘Pizza Prty’ on WXXI Public Broadcasting WRUR shows the semester together as music directors—it of CDs sit on the counter. The 88.5 WRUR,” she says into her Council, which runs, among before, and after bonding over used to be a single-person job. deadline rush of last week’s silver mike. She and Taschman other things, Rochester’s premier shared music—“Hipster music,” But when WRUR executive show has vanished; Taschman recap the previous songs, self- NPR member station. Taschman Taschman explains later, “dirty board elections came about and and Kashket are prepared and deprecate to their anonymous and Kashket, who, along with hipster music”—and meeting they both were on the ballot, the ahead of schedule. In opposite audience about their hipsterism being DJs, are the music directors the requirements, they decided organization’s general manager roles this time, Kashket is on and then segue into their for WRUR, host their show, “ to move to FM radio and co-host told them they could share it. the soundboard, and Taschman goodbyes. Pizza Prty,” every Thursday. a show. Taschman’s decision, in Clutching hands facetiously at is sitting with her laptop, “Thank you all so much It is their second show of the part, was fueled by her family; that meeting, they said yes. managing the song roster and for listening,” Taschman says, semester, and they are tucked both her brother and sister It’s narratives like this that online schedule. Who does what “and be sure to tune in every away in the basement of Todd worked with FM radio in college, bolster the idea—held by many, depends on the week and how Thursday.” Union in the FM radio studio and her brother, a UR grad, according to Taschman and they’re feeling. “Every Thursday, 8-10,” of WRUR’s office. You might hosted a show in the same studio Kashket—that the two are “It gets boring doing the same Kashket adds. “For the best miss the main entrance of the she now sits in. indistinguishable. Apart from thing every time,” Kashket says. music—” office, if not for the mosaic of “And, it seems more real to me,” their similar musical interests and Like Taschman, she sits on the “Best DJs—” stickers plastered over its door. she adds about FM, her eyebrows shared WRUR role, they often edge of her seat. Despite their “Best time: ‘Pizza Prty,’” In the middle of them all lies one jumping in faux-seriousness. finish each other’s sentences and preparation, though, the online Kashket says. saying, “DO NOT BULK.” The Each of them puts together banter with an obvious chemistry. stream of their show is failing “‘Pizza Prty,’” her friend echoes FM radio studio’s pockmarked about an hour of music for every When asked about their for some reason, and their calm into her mike. “Grab yourself a door is sparse by contrast, minus broadcast. The songs they play nervousness while broadcasting, falters. slice and tune on in.” a note that proudly spouts, “Shit alternate between playlists, in they respond in tandem. “It’s nice “Why us,” Taschman wonders, Trombly is a member of Bin.” an attempt to strike a balance because you can pretend no one’s her tone half-serious. “So many the class of 2018.

UR OPINION “IF YOU COULD HAVE THE PERFECT COSTUME, BY BRIAN CAPUTO WHO WOULD YOU BE?” CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER

CRISTIAN MARAVI ‘PhD DAN METHERELL ‘17 VICTORIA STEPANOVA JESS ALEXANDER ‘19 DAVID VANDERMEER ‘18 EMILEE BRECHT ‘19 ‘T5

“Harry Potter” “Danny Phantom” “Borat” “Wonder Woman” “Franz Kakka” “Shrek” PAGE 8 / campustimes.org FEATURES / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 UR TECH Beneath the Surface: Comparing Microsoft’s two new options BY PARSA LOTFI used the majority of the time. As obtain has an NVIDIA graphics Microsoft fixes in the future. touchpad and an improved touch PHOTO EDITOR many have come to learn about processor in the base. According to The Surface Pro 4, on the other surface. As college students, one of the the Surface Pro series, it is meant some reviews, this doesn’t make it hand, is naught but another Unfortunately, Microsoft still most integral parts of the learning as a full-time tablet that does some an ultimate gaming laptop, but it evolution. This doesn’t mean that hasn’t done anything about giving process has become the computer. laptop work in its off-time. is enough to allow it to play most amazing changes haven’t come. you the keyboard when you buy Most of us rely on laptops to get The new Surface Book is the mainstream games and medium This new version gives us a bigger the Surface Pro. You still have to the job done, as they are easy other end of that, a full-time graphics settings. screen with higher resolution, buy it separately for $129. Other to carry around and offer more laptop that can and will moonlight than that, the new Surface Pro 4 is versatility and practicality in the as a tablet when it feels like it; or, very much like the Surface Pro 3, classroom. And let’s be real, most more importantly, when you feel which is pretty good thing, given of us don’t need the power a proper like it. the Pro 3 was the best product desktop computer provides. But we can come back to Microsoft has made. The addition For the majority of college the differences in a bit. If we’re of Windows 10 makes the tablet students, a computer needs to to properly compare them, we that better much. be reliable and able to browse should first look at the similarities So, which do you buy? Given the internet, able do some word between the two. Both share many that we are college students, the processing and maybe run components and design features. biggest factor is likely budget. The some special applications for They both have a 3:2 aspect ratio Surface Book is priced much like 3-D modeling or video editing. to their screens, they both use a Macbook Pro. It starts at $1,499 Therefore, the laptop has largely roughly the same processors and and climbs from there depending been the best bet. they both start with 8GB RAM. on what options you tick. Ticking Now, say it’s time to buy a new Of course, this all depends on all of the options, the price can laptop. There are so many choices configuration. You could get them quickly rise to $2,699. The Surface on the market today that it can to be drastically different based on Pro 4 starts at $899, but this gives often be a very difficult decision. how you set them up. But, let’s get you the Intel M processor. We One of the largest questions is to the fun part: the differences. want better than that! Apple versus Microsoft. In the A lot of the fun bits about the Start with those options, and past week, Microsoft unveiled two the new Surface Book come from CHRISTIAN CIERI / ILLUSTRATOR you can get your tablet to above new products to bring you to their the base. Again, depending on A couple of downsides do exist which is always a nice addition. $2,000. But, that’s if you go for side. The Surface Book and the how you configure, you can get when looking at the Surface Book. Another new feature students will the highest-end tablet you can Surface Pro 4 are on the market as some really nice things added into One is the weight, weighing in appreciate is the slimmer body. imagine. Another thing you Microsoft’s own hardware, rather your new computer. Because the at about 3.5 pounds, which is Imagine all of the new places in should take into consideration than putting their operating Book is meant to serve as a laptop, a lot for what is supposed to be which you can lose your new is purpose. What do you need system in the computers of so most of the batteries live in the such a slim computer. The other computer! to do with your device? If you many other companies. base (about 75 percent). You can major downside is what I believe This is all great on the tablet end, like games and video editing, the So, what’s the difference? still remove the screen portion to be a design flaw. When you but what about when you want to Surface Book is the way to go, but They’re both surface products, and use it as a tablet, but the best attempt to close the laptop, there use it as a laptop? Microsoft has if you need it for basic writing and right? Yes, but that only means battery life comes when the two is a slight gap between the base revamped both their detachable internet, the Surface Pro 4 is the it’s part of Microsoft’s hardware halves are a whole. and the screen near the hinge. I keyboard and their pen or stylus. better bet. lineup. The main difference lies in If you are into graphics-heavy would have preferred a complete The new keyboard has wider Lotfi is a member of how the device is to meant to be tasks, a configuration you can close, and I hope this is something keys, a better typing feel, a larger the class of 2016. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / FEATURES campustimes.org / PAGE 9 Ten spooky ways to spice up your Halloween sex life

BY JORDAN POLCYN-EVANS CONTRIBUTING WRITER partner (not too hard though). Ever entertained a voyeuristic of your very own. with Ursula! Ace Ventura and Once you’re both zombies, fantasy? Jack-o-lanterns are a sexy nurse getting it on! The Halloween is this weekend, you have to move twice as excellent secret keepers, and 7. Painting your bodies Cat in the Hat humping the and what better time to slow, only speak in disgusting, quieter than your pet. They orange (like a pumpkin) yellow Power Ranger! reinvigorate your sex life than unintelligible gargles and rasps also provide fantastic mood When someone says “sexy,” The possibilities are endless. during the spookiest event and jerk your body around as lighting! what’s the first thing that pops of the year? Here are some if you’re fighting against rigor into your head? A pumpkin, of 9. Quoting ‘Monster Mash’ strategies to spice up your mortis. Have fun! course! This Halloween classic is monster mashin’. The best way to attract a chock-full of lyrics to really 3. Pumpkin condoms “ the mate this Halloween is to cover crunch your leaves. Bobby 1. Threesome with a ghost This one is self-explanatory. Sex & yourself in orange paint from Pickett knew exactly what he If you’ve always wanted to gourds can also work depending ” head to toe to get that classic was doing when he wrote lines try a little menage a trois, but on the size. CT pumpkin sheen. Head on over like “my monster slab began to you’d rather ease yourself into LET SEX & THE CT HELP YOU to your local Home Depot and rise,” “the coffin-bangers were it, then why not try finding 4. Yelling “BOO!” when THROUGH YOUR MOST pick up some bold colors, it’s so about to arrive” and of course, someone from the afterlife? you’re about to come AWKWARD SEXUAL YEARS. easy! Make sure you get water- “the ghouls all came.” Thrusting Being a ghost is probably pretty This can really add some based paint, not silicone! to the beat is encouraged. boring, so they’d most likely adrenaline to your Halloween be down. Check out that old night. Everyone loves being 6. Fog Machine 8. Sex in your costumes 10. Summoning Demons Demi Moore film, “Ghost,” to spooked, so why not bring it to When Buffy and Spike got If you’ve ever been curious What better way to spook up warm up. the bedroom? You can also flip it on in graveyards, there was about role-playing, Halloween the bedroom than by holding it around and yell “Boo!” when always fog. Borrow your mom’s is a great place to experiment. a satanic ritual pre-coital? It 2. Pretending to be zombies your partner is about to come. Amazon Prime account for It’s convenient—you’re already really gets the blood going, and This one is fun! If you’re the “free” two-day shipping in costume! I heard Satan is pretty kinky. into biting, try pretending 5. Letting the jack-o’- and you can recreate that sexy Just imagine the potential: Polcyn-Evans is a member of you’re a zombie, and bite your lanterns watch atmosphere with a fog machine Ronald Reagan getting frisky the class of 2017. 75004

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5021A0058 C24849C Fall B2C Print INTEGRITY_10x9.56_nwsprnt_1.indd Cyan Magenta Yellow Black PAGE 10 / campustimes.org HUMOR / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 HUMOR Chris Christie’s White House Fans excited about hopes are history Yankees-Royals BY ERIC FRANKLIN will and look down at the ant-like winning strategy going when he CONTRIBUTING WRITER masses. Now that’s something I boarded the big-government- World Series can relate to and vote for! socialist “quiet car” (or, as it’s Chris Christie blew it. He But that wasn’t Christie’s only known to true patriots, the may have been struggling in the “Obamacar”) until the Osama BY CHRIS D'ANTONA and Synduh-gard are still so polls—and in all other measures bin-stablishment asked him CONTRIBUTING WRITER young and show a lot of promise of success—but his definitely- to leave, and he did what they for years to come. I’m about to not-a-waste-of-time-and-money asked. The First Amendment New York—New York Yankees buy a new player T-shirt, and I campaign is doomed after this guarantees the freedoms of speech fans everywhere are showing can’t decide which one I want.” past weekend. On Sunday, he and assembly, and by letting the up for the Bronx Bombers’ first “It’s been a little weird adjusting boarded an Amtrak train, got lame-stream media bully him World Series appearance since to the new captain since Jeter into the “quiet car,” yelled at his out of those rights, he showed their 2009 win over the Phillies. retired, but this David Wright guy security detail and then yelled his true Washington-insider-PC- They’re buying the new orange is a stand-up dude,” said Bronx at several people over the phone, immigrant-communist colors. and blue jerseys, reserving tickets native Patty McGovern. “I like offending the bleeding-heart I remember when Christie in the Yanks’ new Queens-located the new outfielder they got too. liberals with such terms such as used to make the news for Cespollies—or something like “Frickin’ ridiculous!” and “You yelling at teachers’ unions, ,We expect to be that? It’s so great being a New cowards don’t even smoke crack!” citizens at his town hall Yorker at a time like this. We Having encroached on the left- meetings or that one guy on in the World Series really showed the Sox this year!” wing-PC-bubbles of “politeness” the beach before Superstorm every year, you “You expect to be in the World and “common decency,” the Sandy, or for punishing the Series every year, you know?” conductor asked him to go to anarcho-feminist-al-Qaeda town know?’ [...] Paul Long Island native and die-hard another car. Not only did he of Fort Lee by shutting off their Yankees fan, Paul Cuneo pointed agree to do so, but he later issued access to the George Washington Cuneo pointed out. out. “But, this year, you really saw an apology to the socialists! Bridge. He used to be the perfect them fighting for it. It’s great to have Christie is clearly out of touch candidate, the “straight talker” (as Citi Field and getting behind been behind it for so long ‘cause I with what everyday Americans if God intended talk to be anything arguably one of the greatest pitching hate all of these bandwagon fans.” want out of leaders and their but straight), before the lame- staffs in Major League history, Cuneo expressed how / ILLUSTRATOR future president. His first mistake CHRISTIAN CIERI stream media sucked him in to even for the historic Yankees. aggravating it was to see Facebook was taking public transit. As mistake. If this summer taught their Obama/Clinton conspiracy Thirty-two-year-old Staten Island friends posting about the Yankees’ almost all polls over the last me anything about politics, it’s to destroy the founding principles native and loyal Yankees fan Ralphy success after he’s gone through the several months have shown, that the best strategy is to say of this great nation. I guess now I’ll DiCicco, is optimistic about thick and thin with the Yankees for clearly the interests of Average Joe ridiculous things when everyone have to find another candidate to the Yankees’ chances against the years. “It’s crazy ‘cause all this time I are best represented by someone wishes you would just shut up make America great again. Kansas City Royals. “They’ve got thought these guys were Mets fans!” who owns his own helicopter— or go away, then sit back and let Franklin is a member of the best pitching staff I’ve ever D’Antona is a member of someone who can literally fly at the votes roll in. Christie had a the class of 2017. seen,” DiCicco said. “DeGroom the class of 2016. Fraternity throws ‘perfect’ party, R.I.P. Glenn Rhee students complain that BY SCOTT MISTLER-FERGUSON surprising, however, that with HUMOR STAFF so much outrage at the death of glass is overflowing Glenn, no one—not even the For those of you who spend most dedicated of fans—could BY NATE KURHT for, but can they not see that I me my chance to obtain more Sunday nights reading, eating, recall his last name. “Look, his HUMOR EDITOR didn’t have pockets? Do bottles fresh air, but also totally changed sleeping or doing any other activity name’s not important. I just care just open themselves nowadays? the incentives for me at future not as important as watching the so much about the person that I This past weekend, the brothers It’s sad to say, but I think it parties. Now, what incentive is “Walking Dead,” let me spoil can’t remember his last name,” of Delta Omicron Gamma, is true: chivalry is dead. If it there for me to befriend the cute the show for you forever. Glenn announced a source that requested (DOG), threw a party for the weren’t, they probably would girls on my hall if DOG is going dies. He was our hero and, in to remain anonymous. Whether ages. The theme: “Catering to have given cans.” to let me into parties without some ways a greater survivor than these fans really knew the real Goddamn Independants.” After Freshman Jeff Ransom had a them? When I am a real-life the show’s main hero, Rick. He Glenn Rhee or not, we’re sad to the party, it was clear this theme similar issue with the party. He 40-year-old-virgin, it will all could get out of any dramatically lose him. was not a hit. One freshman on complained, “It was frustrating. go back to DOG not making horrifying situation because of his Or, did we? Thanks to the Yik Yak wrote, “Wow, it appears For the majority of the party, me bring girls to parties to get skills gained as a pizza delivery power of the information age, DOG managed to throw a party I had been talking to the girl ‘free beer.’” guy before the zombie apocalypse. we already have a slew of reports so considerate to our typical of my dreams—some may A final discussion took place He’d been with us since the first coming in that Glenn did not in complaints that it surpassed our even say future-wife material. with Junior Julianne Schaffer. episode, and now they took him fact die because the blood and hopes and completed the circle Then, out of nowhere, some She said, “This party pained away because Noah had to have a guts spurting from him actually to bad. Way to go DOG.” It brother came over and joined me. When I went downstairs, it panic attack and ruin everything. came from a different-colored appears the glass was more than the conversation. He—I can’t was a comfortable temperature. Longtime fans of the show were shirt! Ergo, Noah was being ripped half full—it was overflowing. believe this—asked her out to Not too hot. Not too cold. What devastated by the death of what apart on top of him, and Glenn’s Students found this to be a pain, Starbucks for me. But worse, else do I have to complain about many proclaimed to have been screams of agony were really just still finding complaints. It seems she said yes. I don’t have the on Yik Yak and Snapchat to my their favorite character. cries of remorse because he was that nobody likes it when the declining for that! I wanted a friends who decided to stay in “I just can’t believe he’s gone,” just so passionate about Noah’s glass is overflowing. Douglass date!” and play Settlers of Catan?” Carla Suitor said, a longtime fan safety and so heartbroken to see For instance, Junior Dani When catching up with Junior After the results of the party, of the show and Glenn. “He’s him dying. So, there. Take that, Eber said, “It was ridiculous. Erik Kuhrt, he also had a few DOG is confused as to what been my role model ever since haters. Glenn is a god and can When I go to parties, I usually issues with the party. “When I to do next. They feel they have he saved Rick from that tank in never die! have concerns with my drink arrived, the party was at ‘max done everything that can be season one.” In other news, Jon Snow is being made harder than I like. capacity.’ In response, the done to cater to party-goers. Here on campus, one particularly still dead, and Kit Harrington Before college, Mama Eber brother at the door told me, In response to the negative enraged senior had quite a bit to has contacted Steven Yeun to told me to mix my drinks ‘Hold on, I’ll be right out.’ He feedback, despite their valiant say about the show’s decision invite him into his support group myself or only drink out of went inside and brought out efforts, they stated they may to kill one of his most beloved composed of Ned Stark, Mufasa, a prepackaged container that four brothers. He then told my only have closed parties next characters. Albus Dumbledore, Gwen Stacy, notes the alcohol by volume. group of four friends, all guys, semester. This has sparked “It’s just bullshit man! Total Nick “Goose” Bradshaw, Dobby, At DOG on Saturday, they gave that it was our turn to go in. This outrage in the community. bullshit. Glenn was my boy, ya Primrose Everdeen and Old Yeller. me unopened bottles. I mean, I was ridiculous. I couldn’t believe Kuhrt is a member of know?” Ben Young said. We know, Mistler-Ferguson is a member of appreciate what they were going this outcome. He not only cost the class of 2017. Ben. Believe me, we know. It was the class of 2018. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / A&E campustimes.org / PAGE 11 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT Varga’s ‘Energy, Mass, Light’ shines BY JESSE BERNSTEIN turns out to be Lillian White A&E STAFF (sophomore Meredith Watson), a girl miraculously transported “Energy Mass Light,” by from 1915 into the present. A.J. Katherine Varga ‘T5, took a is skeptical at first, but Lillian’s long road to get on stage. The thirst for knowledge and play, which closed this past earnestness starts to chip away Saturday, was originally selected at her hard exterior, until we’re to be a staged reading as part of finally given a chance to meet Geva Theatre’s Regional Writers A.J. at her most vulnerable. Showcase last spring. Varga, “While many will see the who will graduate this spring, central love story as being has now collaborated with UR between Lillian and AJ, I theatre group The Opposite of believe (after being convinced People to fully realize the show. by Katherine) that the actual Sophomore Michelle Fonda love story is one of love within and senior Steven Winkelman family, between the twins,” play twins and college students director and junior Jordan A.J. and Elliot, living together Polcyn-Evans said. “If applied PARSA LOTFI / PHOTO EDITOR as total opposites. A.J.’s the to the other ideas of the show, whip-smart physics student— it can be thought of as a love unsentimental, exactingly story between not only the NJR ROCKS OUT IN 'BEST OF THE BRITS' realistic and sharply funny. twins, but also the types of On Friday, Oct. 23, No Jackets Required performed their show, “Best of the Brits.” The setlist exclusively included British Elliot is a Shakespeare lover thought that they represent: music—classic rock, pop, alternative and more—from the ‘60s to the present. whose fluffy poetry andscientific and humanistic, propensity towards brief logical and romantic, etc.” infatuations is a constant thorn Fonda as A.J. is excellent. in A.J.’s side. Though the two She’s pitch perfect when it Deerhunter album shoots straight agree on little, their bond is comes to her biting sarcasm strong. One night, during (“Lesbians are a dime a dozen BY AARON SCHAFFER On “Breaker,” the third song, song, with Cox’s warped vocals a rousing game of Trouble, in the English department”), EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Cox sings with guitarist Lockett fading in and out. When Cox there’s a power outage, and the and her ability to be the grown- Pundt, and their lyrics warp concludes the song with the next thing they know, a girl up in her home is warmly Late last month, before the imagination of the listener, fractured lyrics “I drove my car dressed a century out of fashion believable. Fonda has a talent they released their seventh juxtaposing strong ocean over the edge / The leather and is sitting in their living room. for snarling out her lines when full-length album, “Fading currents and the powerlessness the wood / Formed a ledge / What follows is an she needs to, but she’s at her Frontier,” the indie rock band of humanity with the dying I believe we can fly / I believe exploration of what it means best when Elliot’s annoying her. Deerhunter put an interactive anything is real / I believe we to move through time, what’s Though he spends most of the map of their influences on [...] it’s a plea can die / I believe we can live worth holding on to and what first act as not much more than their website. The concept for honesty in an again”, it’s hard to see this as it means to love. The girl SEE ENERGY PAGE 12 map, which was signed “B. anything but an allusion to the Cox”—the moniker of the industry beset by December 2014 car accident band’s singer, Bradford Cox— that sent him to the hospital. included such eclectic sources masked performers Cox has provided little Adele’s ‘Hello’ a as Pharaoh Sanders, Tom Petty, (sometimes information about the accident “souless new car smell” and in the interviews. “decline of music industry” literally, sometimes Deerhunter is known for its much-awaited greeting (sic). experimental brand of indie metaphorically) and music, one long-beloved by BY PAMELA ORTEGO As albums go, “Fading worth the wait. Adele did Frontier” is uncompromisingly the not-so-subtle the indie music machine. CONTRIBUTING WRITER not disappoint, coming honest. It’s a 36-minute long In an August interview with back to the music industry swirl of melancholia and drones of corporate Pitchfork—in which Cox “Hello, can you hear me?” with a bang. The strength of dense instrumentation, and is mentions the nostalgia that Yes, Adele we can hear you, her voice, coupled with the a complex conversation about capitalism. comes and goes in his life— loud and clear. deep, emotional meaning nostalgia and its very human he notes that the album is his After a three-year hiatus from of “Hello” proves to be the effects. In short, it’s everything stars that he sees when driving the world of music, the beloved perfect combination of heart indie rock should be. at night. That’s not a bad thing, [...] the accessibility queen of pop/soul finallyand soul to make up for her Moreover, it’s a plea for at least for Cox, as he explains: returned to the spotlight on prolonged absence. People honesty in an industry “Jack-knifed / On the side- of the album is one of Friday, Oct. 23 with the release everywhere have responded beset by masked performers street crossing / I’m still alive its strengths. of her new single “Hello.” to the release with craze and (sometimes literally, sometimes / And that’s something / And To say that Adele’s comeback adoration; on social media, metaphorically) and the not- when I die / There will be 71-year-old father’s favorite has been strong would be an even celebrities have made their so-subtle drones of corporate nothing to say / Except I tried thus far, because, among other understatement. Within a few love and appreciation for the capitalism. / Not to waste another day / things “It’s really much more hours of her music video’s singer’s return apparent. In a The album’s first song, “All Trying to stem the tide.” The musical.” That’s true, and the release, it has already hit over society and generation where the Same,” sets the mood, with song, which was the second accessibility of the album is 100 million views—a number the overproduction and auto- Cox detailing what it’s like single off the album, features one of its strengths. which is bound to increase. tuned songs of musicians are to just—without metaphor, a guitar melody front-and- The album’s cover, “Zuma Along with the video, Adele the norm, Adele represents class without pretension—exist. center. However, Cox sings #25,” is a 1978 photo by publicized an open letter and grace as an artist. She shows Throughout the album, Cox in a general monotone, and artist John Divola, and comes announcing her upcoming great respect for musicality; her laments a changing America the composition is beset by from a series of photographs album “25,” explaining her emotions surface effortlessly. It is and a changing self. In the melancholy. documenting the destruction extended absence: “My last clear that Adele has mastered second song off the album, On “Take Care,” there’s a of a beachside home that is record was a break-up record the art of making people cry “Living My Life,” Cox laments lurking synthesizer, operated used by firefighters to train. In and if I had to label this one I through her music. Even a a changing America. Over a by Broadcast’s James Cargill. the photo, we see rubble and would call it a make-up record. drought can be solved with all backdrop of guitars, Cox sings, It just about transforms the the colorful metal frame of I’m making up with myself. of the tears caused by Adele’s “I’m off the grid / I’m out of four-minute-long song into the house. But, perhaps more […] 25 is about getting to new hit song and music video. range / And the amber waves of the realm of dream-pop, where hypnotizing is the ocean, pure know who I’ve become without She is truly a rare talent that grain / Are turning gray again.” it stands bare and almost blue and extending as far as the realizing. And I’m sorry it took we are grateful to have in this The song is neither pretentious disemboweled. eye can see. so long, but you know, life century. nor is it inaccessible, and this “Leather and Wood,” which Schaffer is a member of happened.” Ortego is a member of is how the band approaches follows “Take Care,” is perhaps the class of 2016. Her new song was definitely the class of 2019. much of the rest of the album. the album’s most disturbing PAGE 12 / campustimes.org A&E / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 Cringe comedy finds a home in ‘Nathan For You’ BY JESSE BERNSTEIN company that’s tangentially “Curb Your Enthusiasm” come for the show coming to him uncomfortable to speak their A&E STAFF related to a Holocaust denier, to mind), but it’s flourishing during the economic collapse mind.” He’s aping that in a and so Nathan decides the right now. “Review,” “Comedy at the ends of the aughts. way, just on a much smaller Nathan Fielder walks up to only option is to create his Bang! Bang!,” “Louie” and, He’s described reading up on scale. The results, rather than a model. The model is clad own jacket company, called of course, “Nathan For You” the culture of shady dealings being catastrophic, can be in a soft-shell jacket designed Summit Ice. If you go to represent a very specific breed that led to recession, and hilarious. specifically for the company the website, there are light, of comedy. For the more how it dawned on him that “Nathan For You” airs on Nathan has just started. fashionable soft-shell jackets squeamish among us, it can so many enormous decisions Thursday nights at 10 p.m. Nathan pulls the model right along an image of the be excruciating to watch, and came down to “…basically on Comedy Central. aside and says, “Six million “Arbeit Macht Frei” gate into even for those of us with the two people in a room Bernstein is a member of Jews died in the Holocaust, Auschwitz. stomach for it, there are still with one person being too the class of 2018. approximately.” The model, “Nathan For You” is not moments where you can’t confused, stammers out, your typical show, and believe what people will do. “OK.” “So, how many Jews Nathan Fielder is not your What separates “Nathan died in the Holocaust?” typical comedian. The show’s For You” from those shows is that his is not scripted; consequently, the stakes feel higher. We’re not laughing at some poor schlub of a character agreeing to an absurd business proposal—we’re watching real, actual people decide that yes, it would be a good idea The show’s formula is as follows: Nathan approaches a real business owner with an idea that’s either insane, bordering on illegal or both.

CHRISTIAN CIERI / ILLUSTRATOR Fielder asks. “Six million,“ formula is as follows: Nathan to put an ad for a pet store on the model answers. Fielder approaches a real business a gravestone at the local pet smiles. “OK. Great. Let’s sell owner with an idea that’s cemetery. some jackets.” either insane, bordering on It’d be easy to walk away That comes out of a illegal or both. Without fail, from the show and deem the business owners will it cruel. Indeed, watching ‘Nathan For You’ is consent, and Nathan will regular people get essentially spend the episode politely duped into wacko decisions not your typical show, navigating obstacles and can be tough to watch, and Nathan Fielder making it difficult for people and Nathan’s insistence on to say no. His politeness and bringing their personal lives is not your typical awkward social navigation into the businesses factors (he often makes reference into that. In one episode comedian. to his being single and lack last season, he tried to sell of friends), paired with his a reality show based on the TAKE ME segment from the second unsmiling deadpan, can extremely sad, lonely life of a episode of the newest season create wildly uncomfortable security guard he’d met during of “Nathan For You.” The situations. another scheme. It feels a bit premise is that Nathan’s Cringe comedy has always exploitative, but that also father has asked him to stop existed (the best of “Space seems to be the point. Fielder wearing a jacket made by a Ghost Coast to Coast” and has discussed the inspiration HOME Time, art and science collide

FROM PAGE 11 makes it far more palatable poignant, and Varga has TONIGHT ENERGY punch-line, his development than it sounds. Polcyn-Evans’ crafted a low-stakes show that in the second act brings his direction gives the show its is—dare I say it—a crowd- high-pitched blathering to a shape, while Varga’s writing pleaser. much more sympathetic place. holds the audience’s attention. Bernstein is a member of His maturation coincides with It’s funny, it’s tight and it’s the class of 2018. some of the more important events of the second act. Watson is delightful as Lillian–bubbly but not vapid, inquisitive but not annoying. Her brief dalliance with A.J. is as sweet as it is brief, but watching it unfold is wonderful to watch. Jake Lowenherz portrays A.J.’s classmate, and he dutifully TM plays dumb as to Lillian’s SERIOUS DELIVERY! temporal origin. Meanwhile, ★ ★ the set design perfectly displays JIMMYJOHNS.COM the off-campus living decor (neatly arranged bottles, witty posters), and the costuming rightly characterizes its wearers. TO FIND THE LOCATION NEAREST Though “Energy Mass YOU VISIT JIMMYJOHNS.COM Light” is an odd show, it’s still grounded in traditional theatrical conventions, which ©2014 JIMMY JOHN’S FRANCHISE, LLC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / A&E campustimes.org / PAGE 13

CT RECOMMENDS ‘BOOGIE NIGHTS’ BY JESSE BERNSTEIN A&E STAFF

Whether or not you like the films of Paul Thomas Anderson, you can’t say he doesn’t take on difficult material. “The Master” dealt with debilitating alcoholism and cults. “There Will Be Blood” was a scorching essay on capitalism and fatherhood, set in California oil fields in the 1890’s. But perhaps nothing quite touches the high wire act that is “Boogie Nights.” Mark Wahlberg plays Dirk Diggler, a young porn star whose rise and fall are rendered in gorgeous fashion. After his mother kicks him out, Diggler is taken in by Jack Horner (Burt Reynolds), who sees himself as the last great artist in pornography. Their earnest love for the films they create makes the movie great. Julianne Moore plays the porn den-mother, Horner’s wife. Heather Graham, John C. Reilly, Don Cheadle, William H. Macy, Phillip Seymour Hoffman and others play the rest of the production team, each of them fully realized and full of humor and pain. In typical Andersonian fashion, normal people are asked to make impossible decisions that they mess up catastrophically and profoundly. But we’re meant neither to pity nor hate them—just to accept them. Horner laments the shift from ‘70s film to ‘80s video, not just from the point of view of a porn connoisseur, but from the point of view of someone asking what’s being lost. Is it a sense of artistry? Is there even any artistry to filming people having exaggerated sex? Anderson seems to think so, and by the end of the movie, you’re inclined to agree. “Boogie Nights” is available on Netflix. Bernstein is a member of the class of 2018. PAGE 14 / campustimes.org SPORTS / THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 Men’s soccer program records 600th win

BY EMILY LEWIS and junior Alessandro Incerto. SPORTS STAFF Sophomore keeper Redd Brown was only required to make a The University of Rochester single save for Rochester in men’s soccer team picked up its nearly 80 minutes of play. Senior fifth win of the season this past goalie Marshal Davidson played week against Moravian College. the remaining 10 minutes and The 3-0 victory marked the was not required to make a save. 600th win for the men’s soccer The ‘Jackets are one of eight program over its 82 years of teams in Division III to reach existence. the 600 win mark. The program The ‘Jackets got off to a hot now holds a total overall record start against Moravian; senior of 600-333-109. Head coach Andrew Greenway scored his Chris Apple has an impressive fourth goal of the season during 201 wins to his name in his 14 the first 10 minutes of play. years on the sidelines at UR. Junior Jeff Greblick doubled The ‘Jackets look to gain the ‘Jackets’ score when he COURTESY OF UR ATHLETICS another victory against the New found the back of the net off Junior forward Jeff Greblick shields the ball with his body, on his way to a two-goal outing. York University Violets on Oct. a hard blast at the 24:26 mark. night) during the second half of The ‘Jackets ended the game from junior Michael Cross, 30. Greblick scored his third goal the Moravian game, bringing with four shots each from and one each from senior Tyler Lewis is a member of of the season (his second of the the score to 3-0. Greenway and Greblick, two Buck, junior Tanner Chester the class of 2016. Running Club claims Flip Saunders: ‘Crosstown Classic’ title in memoriam BY DANIELLE DOUGLAS competed from the two schools Robaszewki initially reached BY JESSE BERNSTEIN once, Saunders remains far and SPORTS EDITOR combined—22 boys and eight out to RIT through an SPORTS STAFF away the most successful coach girls. Awards were given to the unconventional medium: Reddit. in the history of the franchise. For the first time since its top male, female and overall “I knew I was trying to contact Flip Saunders, the legendary Saunders was fired midway conception, the UR Running winning team, and with their someone who was a part of their NBA head coach and executive, through the 2004-2005 season Club overtook the Rochester exceptional performance, UR running club and realized I had died this past Sunday from before being hired by the Detroit Institute of Technology (RIT) received all three. no idea how to find these people,” complications relating to his Pistons. in a bi-annual, co-ed 5k race “The first year, there were he said. chemotherapy treatment for In three seasons in Detroit, on Saturday. In what is also only four of us from UR [in After posting to the RIT Hodgkin’s lymphoma. He had Saunders led the Pistons to two known as “the Crosstown the Classic],” Coli said. “This subreddit—a specific niche been in a coma for nearly six of the three highest-winning Classic,” UR defeated RIT year, we had 20 runners. It’s section of the Reddit site— weeks. percentages in the team’s history; with UR runners finishing gotten more popular overtime, Robaszewski got a lot of however, in three successive in seven out of the top 10 but the route itself has stayed positive feedback, and, after [...] Saunders was an Eastern Conference Finals, positions. the same.” being contacted by members all-state basketball the Pistons ran into the Shaq The first-place finisher, UR Before the race, the members of the RIT club, a date was set and Dwyane Wade’s Heat, junior Jean-Marc Boullianne, of both teams congregated in for the race. player in high school the historically great Celtics ran a time of 16:09—just Genesee Valley Park (GVP) at “I really like that RIT is championship team and LeBron’s one second slower than the the juncture of the Genesee there, they’re like an alternate before he went on to Cavaliers during perhaps one of course record that had been River and the Erie Canal. They version of us,” Robaszewski play at the University his greatest seasons to date. set in 2014. Boullianne then ran down the Genesee said. “It’s not as much as a After the loss to Boston, was followed by two other Valley Riverway Trail and competition as a ‘sharing in of Minnesota. Saunders was fired. He coached members of the ‘Jackets club, crossed over the pedestrian Rochester’ activity.” the Washington Wizards for a few with senior and club secretary bridge behind UR’s academic The Crosstown Classic is Saunders grew up in Cleveland, seasons and spent some time in the Brendan Coli running 16:30 quad. The course then cut just one of the five or so races the son of a marine and hairdresser. broadcast booth before returning and sophomore Noah Sims behind the Brooks Crossing in which the club competes. Though undersized, Saunders to Minnesota in 2014, where coming in at 16:39. Apartments and continued This year, they have taken part was an all-state basketball player he was president of basketball Freshman Haley Wohlever onward past the Genesee Valley in the University of Buffalo in high school before he went operations and head coach until set the all-time course record Waterway before turning Bulls Invite and won the on to play at the University of complications from his treatment on the female side, placing 21st back over the river into GVP, Kappa Delta Shamrock 5k, but Minnesota. There, he played necessitated he go on indefinite overall with a time of 20:35. ending just before the park’s they plan to run a 15 kilometer alongside NBA luminaries like leave in early September. Wohlever was followed by intersection with Elmwood and several other 5 kilometerss Mychal Thompson and Kevin Saunders was remembered three consecutive RIT runners Avenue. throughout the year. McHale, starting 101 out of his before sophomore Emily Volk Coli, along with senior The club leads runs at 7 a.m. 103 games. claimed the second slot for and business manager Paul and 5 p.m. four days a week. Immediately after his collegiate Though [the the UR girls, and sophomore Robaszewski, founded the The next race against RIT will career ended in 1977, he began Timberwolves] only Lindsey Perrin snagged third. Classic in 2013, hoping it be next semester on the RIT coaching, eventually returning Saturday’s event was the would be a way to increase the campus. to Minnesota as an assistant advanced past the third time that the Classic competitiveness of the running Douglas is a member of from 1981-1986. From there, was held, and 30 athletes club. the class of 2017. Saunders coached all over the first round once, country, spending time in Tulsa Saunders remains far as an assistant and as a head coach for CBA teams in Rapid City, and away the most Sioux Falls and La Crosse––where he won several championships. successful coach in The NBA finally came calling the history of the in 1995, when Saunders was hired as a general manager for franchise. the Minnesota Timberwolves and worked under his old teammate, across the NBA this week, his McHale. loss mourned by everyone from Saunders was quickly inserted his former players—Garnett, as the head coach, where he Stephon Marbury and Ricky worked on developing a brash Rubio—to his fellow coaches, young rookie named Kevin Tom Izzo, Doc Rivers and Rick Garnett. Carlisle. He is survived by his Over the next 10 years, Garnett wife and four children. He was became one of the best players 60 years old. in the league, while Saunders Bernstein is a member of led the Timberwolves to eight the class of 2018. PHOTO COURTESY OF MEREDITH REESE playoff berths. Though they only The running clubs for both U R and RIT hang out together after UR secured the semesterly “Crosstown Classic” title. advanced past the first round THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / SPORTS campustimes.org / PAGE 15 ATHLETE OF THE WEEK Justin Redfern - Football

BY DANIELLE DOUGLAS every time to continue to play the couldn’t believe what we just did. I SPORTS EDITOR game he loves. was fortunate enough to be part of After winning the Walter Payton something special this past Saturday, 1. What is your earliest memory Man of the Year Award in the NFL and I couldn’t have asked to share it playing football? last season, he gave an inspirational with a better group of men. My earliest memory playing speech that I can truly relate to. He 5. With just two games left football would have to be the first talked about how his whole life he before playoffs, what do you hope game I ever played. At the time, felt like he came up just a little bit to accomplish? I was a running back on my 7 to short. The moments I have shared 7-2. That’s our goal. This game 8-year-old Pop Warner team, and with my teammates and coaches is fun no matter what, but we play the first time I ever touched the ball this season have finally allowed at this level to win. The amount in a live game I ran for a 60 yard me to remember how much I love of preparation, time and effort it touchdown. this game, and I believe watching takes during the week to get just Back then, it seemed so simple the emotion Davis felt when a few hours on Saturday are only and so easy, with almost nothing he was awarded with such an completely rewarded with a victory. to worry about. It’s amazing to look accomplishment really connected 6. Would you rather go to back as time flies by at where I began with me. a haunted house with Ellen and everything I have been through 3. After Union took a lead PHOTO COURTESY OF UR ATHLETICS DeGeneres or Trevor Noah? to get to where I’m at today. early on in Saturday’s game, what Senior Justin Redfern looks to pass in Saturday’s game against Union College. To be honest, I don’t really follow 2. Who have you consistently motivated you to step up your another, and it just goes to show that throwing three consecutive either celebrity, so I would have to looked to for inspiration? performance? it’s not over until that last second tics touchdown passes to end the say my offensive line. I was not Thomas Davis, a linebacker for All season, this senior class has off the clock. “Great moments are game with a win? sacked one time this past weekend, the Carolina Panthers. Davis and I been preaching about how we born from great opportunities,” said Honestly, it was surreal. The and that is 100 percent credit to have both been plagued with three only get a few more chances to Herb Brooks of the 1980 “Miracle sequence of events that ended this them. No matter what may pop up severe season-ending knee surgeries, play this game. As frustrating as on Ice” USA hockey team. We were game were unlike any other game in that haunted house, I know the all within a few years of each other. the beginning of the game was, not going to be denied our moment I have watched or taken part in. A big fellas up front have my back! He continued to never give up, there was no time to feel sorry for Saturday. lot of us didn’t even want to leave Douglas is a member of working his way back each and ourselves. This team believes in one 4. How did you feel after the field after the game because we the class of 2017. LAST WEEK'S SCORES Thayer and Moczulski honored by Liberty League FRIDAY, OCTOBER 23 • Field Hockey vs Skidmore College - W 2-0 SATURDAY, OCTOBER 24 • Football vs Union College - W 33-30 • Men’s Soccer vs Moravian College - W 3-0 • Women’s Soccer vs St. John Fisher College - W 4-1 SUNDAY, OCTOBER 25 • Field Hockey vs St. Lawrence University - W 3-1 TUESDAY, OCTOBER 27 • Women’s Volleyball vs Buffalo State - W 3-1 WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 28 • Women’s Field Hockey vs Houghton College - W 3-0 PHOTO COURTESY OF UR ATHLETICS Junior Jennifer Enos takes a breath mid-stroke during the UR Invitational.

THIS WEEK'S SCHEDULE BY BEN SHAPIRO in the individual medley, SENIOR STAFF finishing over six seconds ahead FRIDAY, OCTOBER 30 of the second place competitor. The University of Rochester In his first ever college- • Men’s Squash at Price-Bullington Invitational - Richmond, VA - All Day men’s and women’s swimming level meet, Moczulski was • Women’s Volleyball vs Stevens Institute of Technology - Pittsford, NY - 4:00 P.M. and diving teams kicked off named Liberty League Diver their seasons this past weekend of the Week, thanks to his • Women’s Soccer vs New York University - 5:00 P.M.* in the annual UR Invitational, fourth-place finish on Friday’s • Men’s Soccer vs New York University - New York, NY - 7:30 P.M. welcoming Division I Canisius three-meter board event. College along with UAA He also earned fifth place • Women’s Volleyball vs Fredonia State - Pittsford, NY - 8:00 P.M. rivals Brandeis University on the one-meter board. SATURDAY, OCTOBER 31 and New York University Moczulski and Thayer were to compete on Friday and not the only underclassmen • Men’s Squash at Price-Bullington Invitational - Richmond, VA - All Day Saturday. Over the course of who thrived. Sophomore • Women’s Rowing at Head of the Fish - Saratoga Springs, NY - 8:00 A.M. the two days, both the men’s Gunnar Zemering, who and women’s squads grabbed was a top swimmer as a • Men’s Cross Country at UAA Championships - Waltham, MA - 11:00 A.M. at least one victory—both freshman last year, won the • Women’s Cross Country at UAA Championships - Waltham, MA - 11:00 A.M. topping Brandeis, while the 50 freestyle and finished women also defeated Canisius. second in the 100 freestyle. • Men’s Swimming and Diving vs Hartwick College - Oneonta, NY - 1:00 P.M. Two of the younger members A more established member • Women’s Swimming and Diving vs Hartwick College - Oneonta, NY - 1:00 P.M. of the ‘Jackets teams had perhaps of the team, junior Alex the best performances of the Veech, took home the win in • Women’s Volleyball vs Montclair State University - Pittsford, NY - 2:30 P.M. weekend, with sophomore the 100 breaststroke event— SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 1 swimmer Annie Thayer the only other event the and freshman diver Kasper ‘Jackets finished first in. • Men’s Squash at Price-Bullington Invitational - Richmond, VA - All Day Moczulski both receiving The ‘Jacket teams will next • Women’s Soccer vs Brandeis University - 11:00 A.M.* honors from the Liberty compete in a Halloween League for their performances. meet at Hartwick College in • Men’s Soccer vs Brandeis University - 1:30 P.M.* After winning two events Oneonta, N.Y., a rematch of WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 4 in the pool, Thayer was a meet that the UR men and named the Liberty League women won last year. The • Field Hockey vs Skidmore College - 7:00 P.M.* Swimmer of the Week. The swimmers and divers will then Framingham, MA native won head to Grove City, Pa. to face the 200 butterfly and 400 Grove City College along with *DENOTES HOME GAME individual medley, taking UAA foe Carnegie Mellon. (DH) DENOTES DOUBLEHEADER both by comfortable margins. Shapiro is a member of Thayer cruised to victory the class of 2016. PAGE 16 / campustimes.org THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 / SPORTS SPORTS The overlooked hero of the 2015 New York Mets

BY JACKIE POWELL intellect became known when he giant contracts of Johan Santana, Minaya selected both Matt But, you know what they say: CONTRIBUTING WRITER was hired as a scout for the Texas Oliver Perez, Luis Castillo and Harvey and Jacob Degrom in the everything happens for a reason, Rangers. He was partly responsible even Pedro Martinez. Let us also 2010 draft. and the embarrassing past nine Seven home-runs, 11 RBIs for their pursuing and signing not forget about Guillermo Mota 2. He had a last-minute signing years do make 2015 even sweeter and a slugging percentage of over baseball legend Sammy Sosa. and Frankie Rodriguez, who both of Steven Matz after being drafted for the Metropolitans. 1.000 would qualify any player as Eventually, his work with the earned too much money and in 2009. So, let’s give a big thanks to a playoff hero. For most New York Rangers allowed him to become collectively had issues regarding 3. In ‘06 and ‘07, respctively, he not only NLCS MVP Daniel Mets hopefuls, Daniel Murphy’s assistant general manager (GM) integrity and moral character. drafted Daniel Murphy and Lucas Murphy but also to Omar breakout postseason hasn’t been of the Mets from 1998-2002, and (The Mets couldn’t handle Duda. Minaya, who indeed is the man anything short of “heroic.” he later assumed the role of GM K-Rod’s hot-head of a personality, 4. His willingness to make risky behind Murphy’s success. But, it seems clear that there’s for the Montreal Expos in 2002, and Mota served a 50-game gambles of signing break-out Powell is a member of someone else to thank for creating making him the first Hispanic suspension for testing positive for closers Jeurys Familia, Wilmer the class of 2018. what many never would have GM in MLB history. performance enhancing drugs.) Flores, Ruben Tejada and Juan Sophomore Ryosei Kobayashi stretches to save a ball. imagined could be the hottest From that brief summary Looking back at Minaya’s Lagares after seeing the players team in all of the MLB—the alone, it seems that Minaya is lackluster signings and when they were around age 17. Mets. generally well-received within the acquisitions, I’ve come to the 5. He signed R.A. Dickey to Would it be obscene to say league, considering his numerous realization that Minaya was a minor league deal in 2010. that the reason the 2015 ‘mazing accomplishments. But, to our battling with what any sport mind Without Dickey having his Mets are competing in the World dismay, once he re-joined the in New York must face: he was stellar CY Young winning season, Series is because of someone who Mets as their full-time GM in competing with the Yankees. He the Mets wouldn’t have had trade- isn’t even associated with the 2004, New York baseball fans and felt as though he needed to have bait for the Toronto Blue Jay’s top organization? the media outlets of the Big Apple “stars” or big money free agents prospects—heat throwing Noah Omar Minaya, currently a began to attack him on many every season in order to keep the “Thor” Syndergaard and special adviser to the Major League fronts. fans engaged. Minaya was the hitting catcher Travis Baseball Players Association I spent my tween and adolescent essence of both Dr. Jekyll and d’Arnaud. (MLBPA), was born in the years listening to radio hosts, Mr. Hyde, but up until now, the Minaya could have Dominican Republic and later television analysts and former sports world has only seen him as avoided compensating moved to Queens after entering Mets criticize and scrutinize the evil Mr. Hyde. with ridiculous the 1978 amateur players draft. every move Minaya made. It Let’s take a look at why Minaya contracts if he had Although Minaya’s professional became clear that Minaya went resembles the brilliant Dr. Jekyll. stuck with his guns career was short-lived, his strategic from breaking barriers to being From the beginning of his career, and understood that baseball mind will certainly go the laughing stock of Flushing, Minaya’s mission objective was the Mets prime time down in history. Queens. always being able to analyze and would eventually Before Minaya became His disastrous signings ranged allocate talent properly. In other come. Then, maybe, associated with the Met(ropolitan) from Jason Bay—who could only words, he was a master scout, as Sandy Alderson s in the 1990s (and then again bat in a Pirates uniform or hit a evidenced by five key components: wouldn’t have even 1. At the end of his tenure, from 2004-2010), his baseball homer at Fenway Park—to the been in the picture. CHRISTIAN CIERI / ILLUSTRATOR

FROM THE ATHLETE’S PERSPECTIVE UR rowing has strong performance at the Head of the Schuykill BY JADE MILLER traveling. was so great,” said freshman The Women’s 1V and of Pittsburgh’s B Boat. The CONTRIBUTING WRITER “I got to go back to my home novice rower Josephine Foong. 2V eights raced against four’s A and B boats came in state, which was awesome, and The novice women’s eight-plus teams such as the University 21st and 35th, respectively, This past Saturday, the the experience was so great,” came in 12th out of 41 teams, of Pennsylvania, Fordham racing against teams like St. women’s varsity and men’s freshman novice rower Colleen holding off the 13th place University, Temple University Joseph’s University, University club rowing teams headed to Stone said. “It was really great holder, Lafayette College, by and Drexel University. The of Pennsylvania and Loyola Philadelphia, PA to compete team bonding.” over 13 seconds. They came teams came in ninth and 32nd, University Maryland. in the 44th-annual Head of The course itself was about in fourth out of the Division respectively. The 1V team came The men’s novice eight plus the Schuykill. The ‘Jackets left 4000 meters, much shorter III schools, but managed to in ninth only 0.2 seconds came in 18th out of 38 teams, Rochester at 2 p.m. Friday than the course of the Oct. 4 beat teams like University of behind the University of beating out all but two Division afternoon and came home tired Head of the Genesee and other Connecticut, Trinity College Pittsburgh and behind Drexel III teams. They beat teams Saturday night after competing similar regattas. and University of Pennsylvania. University’s B boat by 1.2 such as Hamilton College, against many major rival A fall race is normally about “Getting our results, we seconds. The four boat also did Catholic University and Duke Division III teams, along with 5000 meters, and many rowers came in as the first Division III well, with the A boat coming University, and they managed

a number of Division I teams. felt that the shorter distance team,” sophomore rower Becca in seventh behind teams like to hold solid placement over PHOTOS COURTESY OF UR ATHLETICS This race marked the first meant that the teams were able Fuchs said. “It felt really good Princeton and University of the course of the race. away regatta for the novice to push their limits and see to come in a solid placement Pennsylvania. UR rowing teams will teams—they had their how they ranked against other against teams like [University The men’s boats hadcompete at the Head of the inaugural race last weekend schools. of Connecticut and University exceptional performances Fish in Saratoga Springs, New on the Genesee River home “The race was painful, but of Pennsylvania], especially in the regatta as well. The York on Oct. 31 at 10 a.m. course—and both teams getting to walk two boats during knowing that those teams are 1V eight came in 10th, four Miller is a member of showed a lot of excitement for the race after the halfway point Division I.” seconds ahead of the University the class of 2019.

PHOTO COURTESY OF UR ATHLETICS The UR women’s varsity and men’s club rowing teams competed in the Head of the Schuykill competition this past Saturday where they raced against Division I, Division III and club teams.