T H E R A D L E Y C O L L E G E CHRONICLE

Vol. II No. 2 31 October 2005 CONSERVATIVES AT PRAYER

The Church of England is a wondrous thing. Within its not with me is against me.’ (Matthew 12:30) baggy confines it includes gay vicars, and vicars who High Churchers, though, believe firmly that if you believe nothing at all; bishops who deny the Virgin mostly do the right things with good intentions, you Birth; happy-clappy tambourine-wavers; vestment- will be all right in the end (whether you will have to queens who make the Pope look dowdy; incense atone for your sins by spending a bit of time in addicts; gospel choirs; Carols from King’s College, purgatory first – the Roman Catholic line – is a moot Cambridge on Christmas Eve; women priests; those point). The classic text supporting this is the Epistle of who think women can’t be priests at all; nuns in grey St James, which used to be one of our regular morning habits; reformed hookers (some of them nuns, too); bible readings. The High Church approach is about and, of course, the Chapel of Radley College. doing things as a group, at church; the personal Many would say this breadth is its strength, though the moment of revelation is not needed. ‘He who is not good old C of E is particularly fond of believing two against us is for us.’ (Mark 9:40) contradictory things at once, like the White Queen in Radley was founded in the wake of the Oxford Alice’s Adventures Through the Looking Glass who Movement, a period which saw the Church of England ‘once believed as many as six impossible things before swing from Low to High Church in a generation. breakfast.’ Thus they came to the famous compromise Robed choirs and priests’ vestments were popping up that says that while women priests are a good thing, if like daisies; churches that had managed perfectly well you don’t agree that’s OK too, and you don’t have to. with a music group (not quite guitars and keyboards, Most congregations, though, try to steer a course but the 18th century equivalent) suddenly installed through the flotsam and pursue some sort of coherent organs. Radleians were even expected to fast on set of beliefs within the wide variety available. Wednesdays and Fridays (that didn’t last long, Traditionally these are broadly divided into High and inevitably), to attend Chapel twice daily, and to wear Low (approximating to ‘catholic’, with a small ‘c’, and white surplices over their suits on Sundays. The ‘evangelical’). The caricatures: High Churchers like Chapel was, from the beginning, the biggest, most ‘bells & smells’ – incense, fancy clothes for the clergy, important and most expensive building in College. impressive music and complex worship in which the And Radley has always continued vaguely upwards of congregation does relatively little; Low Churchers centre; never extremist, never pseudo-Papist, always hold their hands in the air while solidly respectable. The High Church singing, turn up in jeans and a ripped ‘…the typical Radleian way rather suits the typical, T-shirt, and have a strange fondness conservative (with another small ‘c’) for carpets and OHPs in church. would rather die than Radleian, who would rather die than talk about whether he talk about whether he is saved or not But it runs a little deeper than that. (or whether he ‘knows Jesus’, as a The Low Church approach to religion ‘knows Jesus’…’ recent preacher was asking). He much is a very personal one. You are either saved or damned prefers to ‘do the right thing’, sing along to a few good – there is no middle way. Believers have to experience hymns in Chapel, and leave all that embarrassing stuff a conversion, see the light, tell everyone about it, share to the Christian Forum. their redemption with the world. Everyone who is not saved, or born again in this way is damned. ‘He who is Who’s to say he’s not right?

- – - I N S I D E – - - Social Stereotypes  page 22 • Opinion Poll  page 23 • Michaelmas Reds  page 24 • Harry Potter 6  page 30 An Interview with DFL  page 32 • Haddon Cup Review  page 36 • Correspondence  page 40 and much more… 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE SOCIAL STEREOTYPES A new, occasional series profiling well-known Radley types that may be lurking in a social near you... 1. THE ROWER

Henry has to admit he had mixed feelings about the river in his first few terms at Radley. He was an uncomplicated fellow. For him the simple pleasure of messing about in boats was clouded by the utterly wretched pain of training, which always seemed to take place in intolerable extremes of weather – burning heat (is the river that much closer to the equator than the rest of college?), shrivelling cold, gale-force winds whistling up the valley from Abingdon, or a monsoon (rain seems much wetter at the river, somehow). Henry, being from a distinguished military line of Ffarquarsons, persevered nonetheless, as his family was bred to do in times of hardship, and eventually was rewarded with his own set of red Lycra undergarments. These, and two weeks at the rowing- and-revision camp at Banyoles in Spain (‘Sun, Sand and Suffering’), changed everything. His cherished Lycra offered welcome relief from some unusually- placed blisters and allowed Henry at last to show off his newly tanned and sculpted lines to other members Henry hopes to beat his PB. It’ll mean that his WWI of the Boat Club in a way that was alluring yet socially coursework is late again, but Henry is confident that acceptable. he has his priorities sorted. The word on the rafts is, the History tutor at Edinburgh waves you in if you put He holds RCBC’s Maltese cross and motto – ergo on the UCAS form that you can pull a “6:40 with ergo sum (‘I erg therefore I am’) – very close to his negative splits”. heart. Literally, in fact, since it is emblazoned in Radley Red on the breast of every piece of boat club EDWARD CHALK kit. Fleeces, splash tops, cut-aways, ‘beaters’, tracksuits – it’s all ‘free on the bill’ and jolly desirable stuff. The girls of St Stephanie’s swoon when they see FIRST IMPRESSIONS… him sporting it casually over Leave Away in Meribel After six weeks here we asked a cross-section of the or Caffé Nero on the King’s Road. Shells what their impressions of Radley were so far. In his last Michaelmas at Radley, Henry looks back The comments of more than 30 Shells from different and chuckles at the prejudice he once felt towards wet socials are scattered through this issue. bobs. He used to find their constant talk of ‘Ks’ and ‘splits’ intimidating and then, once the mystique had worn off, tedious. Now, of course, these numbers rule “The sport is good, especially the rugby.” his life, and his favourite sounds are the whirr of a fan with a pounding ’80s dance track and the squeak of an “My first impressions were mixed. The seniors were un-oiled Concept II seat. Henry is often found trying much kinder than I expected – my Dad had told me to convert non-rowers to his statistical nirvana over stories of when he was here [in the same social].” huge plates of high-carb pasta at supper. He’s never had much success, but if there is one thing that rowing teaches you – probably no more than one thing, though “All my lessons have gone well and I like all my – it’s an irrational determination to achieve utterly teachers. Super Sixes is great fun on Wednesday.” impossible goals. Tonight there’s an unofficial 2K test in the ergo shack “When I first arrived everything seemed so big. But during prep, and after his 6.45 warm up this morning when I had settled in the opportunities became and two bottles of Lucozade in the afternoon, endless.” 22 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 A POLL ABOUT THE SHELLS becoming about 15% less intimidating year on year’. Let’s try to hit the 20% mark next year. The Shells have been here for seven weeks now – Another question still plagues us, though. The Shells enough time to impress us, annoy us, or remain hidden are evidently getting an easier time of it nowadays but in Social Hall. We have asked 50 of the rest of the is this beneficial to their education? Tom Browns school some questions about their Shell experiences. would answer ‘yes’ but a few Flashmans, if any are The results, we are sure, will astound you… still around in these enlightened times, may disagree. Did you enjoy your Shell year? ‘SS’ Yes: 30%, No: 62%, Undecided: 8% The Chronicle aims to publish an opinion poll every Were you homesick in the Shells? issue. The size of the sample interviewed is usually 50. Yes: 12%, No: 86%, Undecided: 2% If any readers have suggestions of topics or questions to include in future polls, please let us know at Do Shells respect the older years as much as you did? [email protected]. Yes: 8%, No: 78%, Undecided: 14% Did you feel intimidated by the older years when you were a Shell? Yes: 54%, No: 40%, Undecided: 6% OVERHEARD… Should Shells be punished by the prefects more than by the dons? An occasional column devoted to quotes from around Yes: 64%, No: 26%, Undecided: 10% College. Do you like the Removes more than the Shells? Overheard at a Choir practice: Yes: 18%, No: 50%, Undecided: 32% Boy: ‘Sir, what does ‘Amen’ mean?’ Should ‘fags’/’duties’ for Shells be abolished? Yes: 4%, No: 90%, Undecided: 6% Overheard in a Remove English lesson: Should Shells be allowed to queue for lunch before Five minutes after a discussion of the phrase 1pm? ‘ignorance is bliss’: Yes: 4%, No: 92%, Undecided: 4% Boy puts his hand up, and says thoughtfully: ‘actually, Should Shells be allowed into Oxford at weekends? ignorance is pretty good.’ Yes: 72%, No: 26%, Undecided: 4% Overheard at Christian Forum: Should Shells be allowed fizzy drinks in Shop? Yes: 76%, No: 20%, Undecided: 4% Boy: ‘Jesus versus Batman – who’d win?’ Did you watch the Haddon Cup this year? Overheard in the Music Department: Yes: 10%, No: 88%, Undecided: 2% Don: ‘one of my favourite concerts is Guitars Do you treat the Shells well? Untuned’ Yes: 86%, No: 6%, Undecided: 8% Were you treated well as a Shell? Overheard in the Electronics Department: Yes: 64%, No: 30%, Undecided: 6% Boy: ‘Sir, how do you spell ‘check/cheque’?’ Don: ‘Which one?’ It appears that while our sympathy is aroused by the Boy: ‘The one with the ‘ch’’ plight of Shells in Shop and their (lack of) adventures in Oxford (although not their delayed lunch), the school feels that times have changed since we were ‘Well, it’s nice to be here in D Social’ (visiting don Shells. An interesting comparison can be drawn speaking at H Social prayers) between these attitudes and those of a Chronicle poll last term of 50 Shells, in which only 10% said they Please send us (printable) quotes for the next had felt intimidated compared with the 54% here. ‘Overheard…’. Perhaps there is a trend of decreasing intimidation? We think there is – official statistic: ‘Radleians are

23 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE MICHAELMAS REDS

There is blasphemy in our ranks, fellow Radleian! in corpore sano, in other words: a well-rehearsed There is a Communist cancer in the system that must argument. We also know that children are becoming be rooted out and destroyed! Dangerous subversion less fit and more overweight – traceable directly to the from a deluded fanatic appeared in these august pages twin evils of a poor diet and lack of exercise. recently. An article dared pose the question “are we all Inculcating the habit of regular exercise in young taking rugby too seriously?” Our raison d’être, our people is a government target, and it would be wrong Saturday religion, our hallowed turf is being for any Radleian to pass up the unsurpassed sporting challenged. Is this a crackdown on rugby, the opium of opportunities on offer. There’s yet another benefit… the Radleian? cynics might say that Removes, for example, tired after two hours on the rugby pitch, will lack the energy Hmmm. But seriously, folks, some interesting points to misbehave in lessons; certainly this was the view were raised in that coruscating attack in the last issue, taken by some headmasters in the 19th century. ‘Michaelmas Blues’. Do some of us do get a bit over- excited on match day? Do rugby and its adherents It is absurd to suggest that Radley has a ‘one size fits have a undeservedly elevated status in college? I do all’ approach to sport in general, and rugby in not think so. It is not the players themselves that take particular – there is so much to do here and a large the game too seriously; it is the very idea of ‘taking it degree of choice from the Removes upwards. Neither seriously’ that is being taken too seriously. For do hierarchies in the Shells or any other year depend example, the whole ethos of the two (very successful) very much on which team one is in, according to my Stonewall rugby teams is not to take the game own extensively-researched ‘anecdotal evidence’. seriously at all. A majority of the top three years do There are other benefits to playing a game such as not even play school rugby at all: if that article is to be rugby, at whatever level. Most would say that the good believed, however, this silent majority are “regarded old-fashioned values of sportsmanship, discipline and as dangerous subversives”. Take one example – the teamwork are important; these are inculcated Head of School. No doubt about it, there’s a maverick effectively by a team game such as rugby. Those who revolutionary if ever I’ve seen one. disagree with this, and the whole competitive team One has to remember (stop me if I’m sounding too sport thing – well, they knew what Radley is about, establishment) that at Radley, the academic side to and perhaps would be better off somewhere else college is, and has always been, number one (it says so (perhaps not Wellington). in the New Boy’s Guide so it must be true). Do the To take on another point mentioned – the excitement national newspapers devote many column inches to that is apparent in college on a match day is not school sports results? Is there an annual parental oppressive at all, it’s just a bit of fun. Perhaps some frenzy in December over the ‘Independent Schools’ have slightly lost sight of that; rugby is only a game. Rugby League Table’? No, I don’t think so. We know that, but loyalty and support for one’s fellows is, surely, a good thing, rather than apathy and The anonymous critic writes, safe in the knowledge going into Oxford “shopping”. that no-one will challenge him, ‘anecdotal evidence suggests some candidates may fail to shine in the Despite seditious grumbling, there is no doubt that Oxbridge interviews because they are simply too Radley is a more-than-averagely rugby-orientated tired’. For ‘anecdotal evidence’ read, ‘I just made this school. Every-one knows about the size of the posts up.’ What real evidence is there? The under-achieving (you can hardly miss them) and the tired old jokes that rugger-buggers in Bigside contain 6 out of 11 pups, are plastered over Covered Passage every week are and, over the years, more than their fair share of hardly discreet either. Yet this enthusiasm is integral successful Oxbridge candidates. Not to the character of the place: there that this matters – the benefits of ‘This was like a seems to be (albeit from my ever-so- rugby spread far more widely than slightly biased view as a Bigside to the top team and the academics. crackdown on rugby, the player) a ‘work hard play hard’ As for the time-wasting accusation, opium of the Radleian…’ attitude that is encouraged by the in our daily timetable it would not college; half of this is clearly the be healthy or possible to sustain concentration through ‘playing hard’, and rugby is perhaps the best way we the afternoon, as well as all morning and in the have of doing this. Nationalism may be frowned upon, evening: sport provides fresh air, exercise, a in England, at least, but the one opportunity to support challenging different activity to apply yourself to – it the country comes in international sport – similarly for is almost impossible to worry about coursework us with inter-school matches, which give us a chance deadlines while giving your all to the game; mens sana to cheer on the reds and be proud of the institution we 24 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 are part of (OK, I admit, this is rather establishment). nothing better than to make everyone else worship Sport may form a fair part of college life, but this, to a their game. I can promise you that they don’t really certain extent, is what you sign up for. Without sport, mind if you don’t watch the game or can’t name the college life doesn’t really bear thinking about. It last 40 Samoa captains. Those who take it seriously do would be, God forbid, like Winchester. In the same so because they enjoy it; this is certainly not way, if the colour red gives you a migraine, you mandatory or, even at Radley, exceptionally common should probably not come to Radley. We are lucky behaviour. Radleians should play rugby at a level they that sport is taken seriously here: in most state schools, enjoy, and if for some this is not at all, that’s fine. sport is not able to be enjoyed nearly as much. The Spare a thought, though, for we Bigside players who Government itself is just waking up to this, and have to play for fun, for the entertainment of others, making noises about protecting the few school playing and the glory of the school all at the same time. Now, fields left that survived the great sell-offs of the 1980s if you’ll excuse me, I must get back to perfecting that and 1990s. lineout move: the crowd will crucify me on Saturday if Don’t think rugby players are muddied oafs who like I get it wrong again…

OCTOBER DIARY ß Squash has taken over my life recently – an of the man than I had before, and a warm patriotic addictive recreational habit has never come in so feeling about England and ships and bravery and all virulent a form, I can assure you. I have already that. I’ve done my three term stint in the Navy CCF broken two racquets this term, but that’s alright, as and can, therefore, rest at night safe in the knowledge neither were mine. Guilt? Not much. Anyway, these that I am part of Britain’s great naval tradition. Supper minor incidents are merely tiny stains on the pristine afterwards was a feat of culinary genius, the likes of white bedsheet of my soul; the Ariel Ultra of Sunday which human civilisation has never before achieved. I Chapel usually does the trick. don’t think I have ever seen so much meat in one At this point, though, I thought it only considerate place, at one time. Oh – bad memory – apart from a St to my peers to get a racquet of my own. It is an Mary’s social I once attended. impressive device that sends the ball careering onto ß One of the occasionally vexing problems of my the front wall, zipping to the back of the court and life, more so than where am I heading, or the colour of dropping there, ensuring the double bounce for my my hair, is what the hell a chap is supposed to scribble opponent. If only the rest of life was this simple. The on the piece of paper when he is trying out a fountain colour scheme is even more impressive: red and black pen. I always feel like a prat, whatever I write. I found with bright green strings. I’m still not winning, myself re-hashing the translation of my Latin GCSE dammit: my ungainly, mal-coordinated swipes at the text the other day, much to the bewilderment of the ball prove the traffic jam to its Ferrari. shopkeeper: he must have thought I was completely ß Jim Norton provided an alarming view of the future mad writing hocus pocus about some chap called in his talk here on Thursday. His vision of centres of Aeneas hiding protecting gods under stones and losing computer processing taking away power and choice his wife on a pleasant evening walk and then going from individual people was very disturbing in a 1984 back to find her and meeting her ghost, but not, as way. Although he showed us a mobile phone with some rather dubious characters across the pond would paper for a screen, which looked fun. The most have it, being given the sword of Troy. It is essential perturbing realisation I had during his talk was one of to give a prospective pen a good test run – this one my own – far more distressing than all of this future may soon be sitting in my fingers for some very nonsense was the difficulty I had, at the back of Silk important weeks in the Barker Gym… Hall, reading his paradigm of a PowerPoint. If it’s ß David Cameron is the man for the job. SR and going to be glasses, then I can imagine myself better in Boris Johnson have been saying it for ages. a pair of half moons rather than the Soho art dealer, Dolce & Gabbana type of ophthalmological nose gear. ‘TRUMPINGTON’ There’s nothing for it – I’m preparing myself for a trip to Specsavers. …FIRST IMPRESSIONS… ß The Nelson Mass was very impressive, to say the least; the speakers read with clarity, the band – “Art is good, especially doing work for the new orchestra seems a bit dignified for all those military Theatre. I hope we get more freedom later though.” trumpety bits – performed excellently and the overall experience left me with much more of an appreciation “I don’t like Chapel as I am at the back so leave last.” 25 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE FERGUSON SINGING PRIZE OCTOBER 13, SILK HALL ADJUDICATOR: Mr Ralph Allwood, Precentor of Eton College INTERMEDIATES gamut of emotions, and he sang and acted these with great intensity, ranging from ff to a whispered pp. The In the late afternoon a small audience gathered in the A. was very complimentary. Silk Hall to hear the eight singers of the Intermediate competition. The following are a mixture of this Jamie Watkiss (H) sang one of the hardest Bach arias, reviewer’s opinion and the comments of the Schlummert ein from Cantata 82. He has a good voice, adjudicator. This part of the competition, perhaps and had learnt a good many of the words. The only because of the smaller audience and informal feel, felt trouble was that there are an awful lot of them in somewhat like auditions for the X Factor, catch phrase German, and there was no safety net of a copy to – ‘do you have the X Factor’? Fortunately, rank-and- hand. We all felt for him when the repeat came round. file audience members did not have to pass vicious The A. while sympathising with Jamie, said that he judgement in a Simon Cowell-like way – “My dear, was the only performer he had ever seen to sing a you have the voice of a chainsaw and the personality whole piece with his hands in his pockets… There was of a doorstop…” – that being left to the adjudicator. a good tenor voice there but he was hamstrung by an over-long, difficult piece. Freddie Tapner (F) sang An die Musik by Schubert, one of the most beautiful Lieder ever written, the A. James Roupell (A) played Shelter by Ray LaMontagne commented. It is a hymn about Schubert’s own with James Twallin (A) accompanying on the guitar. feelings on music, and in form a canonic dialogue This was different – an informal, sit-on-chair-and- between the singer and the piano’s bass line. Freddie walk-around kind of piece, and so James (the singer) sang confidently with a solid German accent. His pitch did just that. The A. commented that the audience was was spot on, and all enjoyed a thoughtful performance. not sure whether the crossed arms were a sign of Arthur Sawbridge (E) sang Bright is the ring of words unconfidence, or a stylised look... best to make that by Vaughan Williams, a piece well suited to his range. clear. James has a clear, high voice and made light of His voice has not settled down yet, but his was a the high parts. Good to see something a little different pleasant, soft tone, although the A. said that he must at the end of this competition. practise not singing ‘through the nose’ so much. ADJUDICATION Alex Douglas (C) sang Sea Fever, an atmospheric 1st Rupert Lazarus (B) setting of Masefield’s three verse poem. We were Commended Alexander Easdale (A) treated to only two of the verses, however, although only someone who knew the song well would have SENIORS noticed. Alex’s tone was varied from a whisper to ff, and, in short bursts, he showed the potential of a very There weren’t any yodellers this year, which was good adult bass, said the A. Next, Edward Crichton disappointing, but what made up for it was the (C) sang a well-known Handel aria, Where’er you remarkable standard of singing on offer. Our first walk, with a promising sound. The A. advised him to contestant in this savage competition was Robert take it down a tone, just to be slightly more Crabtree (E). Pur dicesti, o bocca bella by Lotti was comfortable, so that he did not have to worry at all sung more-or-less to the floor with a somewhat about the high notes. He relaxed into his performance scarecrow physical presence, but nonetheless his tone and, by the end, seemed to be enjoying and phrasing were excellent. Being our himself. ‘this part of the leader the Head of Choir, he began the concert in an excellent fashion allowing The next performer breezed on and competition felt like us to relax into our seats and drool just sang Alma del core by Caldara in a a little bit as bella floated into our strong tenor voice. Alexander auditions for the minds, soothing, soothing… Easdale’s (A) Italianate ‘rs’ were a X Factor’ delight, and the audience enjoyed his Well! Awoken with a start by Francis simple, confident delivery. He appeared relaxed on Forbes-Edwards’ (C) By Strauss by Gershwin. He stage, and so we were too. His dynamics were simple displayed a controlled, strong voice but the manner in but effective – the phrases repeated piano. Rupert which he declared ‘by Strauss’ during the performance Lazarus (B) later admitted that he has only been caused us to fear for our lives – the volume, the singing for two terms but none would have guessed it volume! Next was George Nye (E) singing Stars by during his very confident performance of Stars from Schoenberg (the Miserables one, not the twelve-tone Les Miserables. This song encompasses the whole one, fortunately). Good phrasing, strong assertion of 26 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 the melody, a nice little added character and voilà! who goes when in the programme. But, Seb was a very Très bien! He seemed to sway about a bit though and, musical performer and perhaps with a little more oh, George, no tongues please, we’re British. I strength of voice he would have made the top placings. thoroughly enjoyed it and wanted more but he left the Ed Hodgson (H) now glided across the floor toward a stage and all was sad. Not for long, though, for Rory piano prepared by the forces that are Mr Williams and Stallibrass (C) soon appeared to perform All I care Dr Morris. Coldplay. Coldplay! Ah yes, that’s better. about is Love in a very cheeky chappy kind of way. I Well, it was a tidy performance and Ed did a good job was never tempted to write anything rude here for his of resembling Christopher Martin. His multi-tasking – performance was splendid. As the adjudicator accompanying his own song on the piano – was explained, ‘he really knew what he was gonna do next’ impressive, though at times he may have got carried – a little crude, yes, but he was from Eton so it was away with one skill and forgotten the other. On the OK. Indeed, Rory explored the stage in front of the whole, however, it was a welcomed contrast and piano very well and made full use of his pockets, memorably different. As several people tried to escape planning his dramatic gestures well. His shoes were at the back Tom McPhail (H) appeared and began to also very clean. sing Amarilli, mia bella (I know, those Italians – one track minds). His performance was professional, Theo Whitworth (C) gave us another Italian largely flawless and clearly musical. He now has a monstrosity, O del mio dolce ardor by Gluck. I have to powerful and individual countertenor sound – rare, and say this had hugely improved from the coffee concert good to see, said the A. a few weeks earlier and the A. thought it was ‘musical and well-prepared’. The only thing I really remember The end? No! One more? Who could it be? Of course, about that section of the evening was the splutter of we all had programmes so we knew but I’m trying to crudely muffled giggling given by some shameless inject a bit of excitement here. Adrian Pascu (B) was person in the vicinity of Miss Naylor (although I am the final singer of the evening and an excellent choice stopping short of saying it was actually her). A at that. Now, I could go on about Adrian’s silly pleasant English song came next in the form of gestures and his habit of grinning at the audience but Duncan Browne (H) performing Anyone can whistle. my brief is to review the music, so I won’t. He really Call me old-fashioned but I felt a little let down when pulled this off, the last of the Italian rubbish, Torna a the virtuosic whistling passage never came and so I Surriento. His singing, in the bluntest terms possible, decided I didn’t like that piece. Duncan sang well, and was very good. Strong, but delicate at times, well- laughed off a very slight loss of the words. An odd phrased and there was an understanding of the thing: Duncan chose to stand in a different postal meaning of the song there that other performers were district to the piano, for some reason. not so good at. One of the better performances. Our first countertenor soon arrived, rather resembling Well, to finish off quickly, despite my unnecessary Benjamin Sheen (C) singing the Evening Hymn by words the competition this year was a triumph – this Purcell: one of his most beautiful songs, a serene event should be far more popular. Why do so few boys farewell over a mesmerising come to support? Remember that ground bass. Ben has a charming ‘The only thing I remember anyone can enter – they do not and delicate voice and his middle about that section of the need to be ‘serious’ pieces sung in range was a real delight to listen a ‘serious’ way. Many thanks to to. The long phrases are tough to evening was the crudely Mr Allwood for his superb manage, but at this relatively brisk muffled giggling’ adjudication – a model of its kind: tempo he managed them very well a warm, witty, sympathetic and indeed. Easier to scold is Edward Chalk (C) who sang engrossing dissection of the singing. I only want to say from Jesus Christ Superstar. This One final comment – have you noticed how this year was an extraordinary performance. Firstly, his little the senior competition was dominated by C Social (6 introduction was very formal, very public service entries) and H Social (3 entries), with three socials not announcement circa 1940. Then came astounding represented at all? Who allocates the music scholars? vocals through a huge range of emotions and notes. I A mystery. was a little frightened at first by the facial expressions, but once over that I found myself liking Lloyd Webber MATTHEW JOHNSON a little, so thank you, Ed. ADJUDICATION CONTRAST! Mozart. Seb Lomas (H). He performed Mozart’s O Isis und Osiris with confidence and a very 1st Robert Crabtree (E) serious face, but I needed someone to equal Ed’s mad 2nd Tom McPhail (H) madness. Of course that wouldn’t suit Mozart at all but Commended Edward Chalk (C) I’m sorry that’s the fault of the person who arranges Ben Sheen (C) 27 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE VI.2 LECTURES David Cameron MP – ‘The Tory Future’ SEPTEMBER 16, SILK HALL Dr Evan Harris MP – ‘A Liberal Democrat Perspective’ SEPTEMBER 29, SILK HALL

The future of the Conservative Party is a subject dear which modern politicians in the era of Tony Blair to our hearts and close to our wallets (or should that be seem prone: sometimes the audience did get the vice versa?). Since political time immemorial, impression that the polished paragraphs of his wobbling right-of-centre governments have taken exposition were just a little too smooth to be true, solace in the fact that, whatever might happen in glossing over details in some areas. deepest Westminster, there will always be a strong fan This was vehemently not the case, however, when he base in OX14. So it is with interest that we pursue the was answering questions put to him from the floor. Mr tortuous throes of the Tories in finding a plausible Cameron was hugely impressive thinking on his feet, a leader, and it was with great warmth that we received skill, of course, essential if he is to become Leader of one of the front-running candidates, Mr David the Opposition and survive the rough-and-tumble of Cameron, the Shadow Education Secretary. Prime Minister’s Questions. The depth of his It was never going to be a rough reception: the Old knowledge was revealed here, and many probing Etonian Mr Cameron is quite clearly questions were rebutted with ease. “one of us”, professing fond ‘right-of-centre Not answering the question is memories of cricket on our pitches. governments know there something at which politicians are His shirt/tie combo had many of the adept; for Mr Cameron this was not snappier dressers in Common Room will always be a strong the case. He has just become, at the admiring, his choice of car made the fan base in OX14’ time of writing, the bookies’ Warden wonder why he’d ever favourite and while this may be bought a Ford, and his dulcet, lyrical speaking tones somewhat premature, and at the risk of appearing in put the tenor section of the Choir to shame. The gags Private Eye’s ‘Order of the Brown Nose’ column, we that soon flowed were genuinely amusing – smooth hope he gets in. He is young, agreed, but he will grow enough to be comfortable, yet not obviously rehearsed out of this fault, and although relatively inexperienced – and it’s fair to say that the audience was soon firmly and untested, he looks very much a future (somewhat on his side. Blairish) Prime Minister. The Conservatives are a brand, according to Mr Dr Evan Harris had a much tougher job. To alter the Cameron, and one that is strongly in need of updating Conservative bias of Radley is like trying to reposition and making more palatable to a twenty-first century the stars themselves: some things are just meant to be. electorate. His tripartite slogan seemed to be “modern, But perhaps this was not the exercise: the title of the compassionate Conservatism, implying perhaps that lecture, ‘A Liberal Democrat Perspective’, indicates the Conservatism of today is hard-nosed and out-of- that the purpose was to introduce Radleians to a date. Clever Mr Cameron knows, of course, that it is different ideology from that of the green welly very tricky to be arguing against modernity or brigade. Also, more literally, perhaps to give us an compassion, particularly so for his rivals, all older than idea what it is like sitting way off to the right hand himself. Above all, he would like to distance the side on the Opposition benches. Whether this Tories from that damning epithet of the last two succeeded we are not entirely sure: certainly we were elections, ‘the nasty party’. more disparaging of his shoes than his ideals. To be fair to the sartorial police, he was not brilliantly turned His style was hugely impressive. He spoke fluently for out, Doc Martens not the best choice, half an hour without notes and but his ideas deserved a second look. appeared engaged in all the issues to borrow a phrase from that were brought up; we could see the Sub Warden – Dr Harris spoke passionately about that he had very definite ideas of his desire to change things, and in what he wants to do with the ‘it was a treat’ some cases for them not to be Conservatives. His own shiny new one notwith- changed. For example, he was keenly pro-hunting, standing, Mr Cameron said that the Conservatives which had a certain placatory influence, not least in G must “go beyond slogans”, and this was reflected in Social. He baffled some in comparing hunting to his admission that he doesn’t like the word “choice”, homosexuality as “something people do”, but his because it is “glib”. Indeed, glibness is the one ill to argument – that you have to be consistent in tolerance 28 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 of these practices – was a strong one. Agreed, genius? Although his “inept chavish likenesses made terrorism is also a minority activity, but the London shudder,” as Gordon put it, his death was ridiculousness of comparing the two highlights the mourned nationwide and commemorated by statues common sense of his ideas. and namings all over the English-speaking world. The account of the battle was given in great detail Dr Harris also spoke without notes, and his delivery (complete with Frenchmen bashing) right down to made up in passion what it may have lacked in Admiral Lord Collingwood’s apple-throwing antics fluency. He was clear about his desire to see the Lib and the point-blank firing tactics that the English used Dems in power – “I’m not in this to be forever in third when breaking through the French and Spanish line. place”, he declared – and as a result his support for The consequences: the 19th century became Britain’s constitutional reform is hardly surprising. What those great century of commerce and Empire-building not dazzled by his tie would have noticed, however, is despite a decline in the power of the Navy. that his policies, although definitely left wing, were not quite the “socks, sandals and beards” image that After a break for questions, the speaker told us of his we had nursed all these years. He was refreshingly great interest in the battle, despite being a WWI frank about Charles Kennedy “not liked in the historian. He described the rise and fall of the Royal Commons, but liked by ordinary people”, and his Navy and used many comparisons with the Battle of belief in personal liberties was favourably received. Jutland in the First World War to illustrate how the Royal Navy had declined in power over the course of Where he could be criticised, however, is in attacking 110 years, especially due to the transition from the the other parties more than praising his own. His wooden ships to those made of metal. response to the question “What would you do about Iraq if you were elected tomorrow?” was a rather We were given a good insight into the events of 1805 disappointing answer along the lines of “We wouldn’t in the run up to the celebrations of the bicentenary. have gone into Iraq in the first place”, which didn’t answer the question or show much grasp of realpolitik. THE ANGELL PIANO TRIO Similarly, he was scathing about the Tories’ attitude to WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 28, SILK HALL electoral reform: “You’d have to be stupid, but they are”. Full marks, however, for not compromising his My, My, My! No, I’m not quoting that trendy dance views to suit a naturally Tory audience: he was never remix song, I’m actually referring to the concert put on going to be preaching to the converted, and although by the Angell Piano Trio (on ‘the day we lost to his speech probably did little to sway our political Warwick’, for some of you). The repertoire performed beliefs, it raised some interesting issues. was Beethoven’s Piano Trio Op 1 No 3 and Shostakovich’s First Piano Trio. Attended by the What we saw were two very different speeches with same number of people who subscribe to Fish Hooks very different goals. It is fair to say that both Weekly – or probably many fewer – I am appalled at succeeded to some extent, and both provided much to the lack of suppport given by students and staff to chew over and discuss afterwards. Sixth Form lectures these quite remarkable events. Need I only quote that are an excellent mode of getting us to think beyond the ‘we haven’t heard piano playing like that in this hall next Bigside match and past “Jordan’s bazookas and for some time’ even though it was soon followed by Kylie’s behind”, as a certain dons’ song had it. On ‘that piano has a dodgy A’. both occasions – to borrow a phrase from the Sub Warden – ‘it was a treat’. So, to actually review the thing: all I can say is that it was simply wonderful. The piano playing was at times Andrew Gordon – ‘Trafalgar’ light and sensitive and at others menacing and 14 OCTOBER, SLT determined, without being harsh. The ’cello seemed to be played ‘as if the ’cello wasn’t there at all’ – in The bicentenary of the Battle of Trafalgar fell on layman’s terms it was very good. And the violin, THE October 21, and Radley has celebrated with the Nelson VIOLIN! Vanessa Mae go farm something, a new kid Mass and a special meal for college. Disappointingly is in town. Although I don’t know his name – we shall there were no plans for a re-enactment of the battle by call him Mr X. X was fine indeed, while indulging the the CCF Naval Section on College Pond, but, as if to audience with a little romantic vibrato that we all love make up for this, Andrew Gordon, a prominent World to hear, he was sensitive to the period and had a firm War I historian, was invited to give a VIth Form control of the work. The choice of pieces Lecture on the Battle (as a warm-up to his talk at demonstrated the performers’ virtuosity and versatility Portsmouth on the big day the following week). and even if you’re not into that music mumbo jumbo The first part of his lecture was concerned with the rubbish the performances were stunning and very question of exactly what we were celebrating: the impressive so why didn’t you, just this once, miss that result of the Battle? Or Nelson’s heroism and naval crucial beginning of Desperate Housewives? 29 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE or WHAT I READ ON MY SUMMER HOLIDAYS

The first really difficult question of term was the But perhaps the sacrament of HP6 has its own English department’s inevitable ‘what have you read drawbacks too. The terrible agonies of anticipation. this summer?’ Combing the insipid swamp of my The nerve-rending worry of whether JKR could mind for something long and Russian, I was surprised possibly deliver the goods yet again. And, of course, to find a suppressed literary secret. I wanted Brontean the ostracisation by one’s peers. Following generations sophistication, Wildesque wit, Dickensian gravitas. will never know our pain. They will bypass it with Admitting to devouring HP6 within hours of its audio book, feature film and themed pencil case. Not release seemed inappropriate, sacrilegious, even, for them the purgatory that awaits any fan between within a small range of the David Rae Smith building. books (see the cover article in the last issue about the unique experience of the current VI.2s, growing up With the exception of some of the more aggressively alongside Harry Potter); people will be able to read all reclusive members of E social, it is unlikely that the seven books on demand. Patience will become a lost penultimate instalment of JK Rowling’s heptology has art. Endurance will be passé. Society will crumble. escaped the notice of any member of College. Indeed, Life will end at 40. Red wine will be served chilled, many, both young and old, exhibited prophetic skills and with a McFish burger. But worst of all, I’ll bet that of such vision and clarity on the subject of its release the ensuing generations that grow up with all the seven date, sometimes from as far off as the Lent term, as to books available will actually try to analyse the stories. put Isaiah and his mates in the Old Testament to shame. One got the impression that holidays were And, God forbid, the prose. If it were to be compared being planned around a certain midnight date with to an element, then leaden is more like it than golden. Ottakar’s on July 16. Nationally there was an epidemic Let’s be honest: most of the writing is pretty of the ‘Harry Potter virus’ – imaginatively named by formulaic, comprising thousands of pages of ‘ ‘X,’ said one of their advertising executives. Probably the same Y adverbly’. Go on, pick up a Potter, flick it open at a one who came up with the idea of calling the chain random page and see what I mean: ‘Pottakar’s’ for the week. ‘Gosh,’ said Hermione anxiously. ‘Never mind,’ said Ron reassuringly. When the red-letter day arrived, I happened to be in ‘Come, on, we haven’t much time,’ said Harry Italy. I had fully expected to be awoken that morning suddenly. (I made these up, but you get the idea.) by the sound of the seventh seal being broken. Perhaps even the four horsemen of the Apocalypse would Book Six was always going to be grim. Storms had make a guest appearance. But there were no trumpets, been brewing for several books now, and while some and so, rising late, I set about my well-established pre- squalls had blown themselves out, there was still the Potter reading rituals uninterrupted. Unfortunately, big one lurking offshore. The story picks up again in a naïvely, I had not reckoned on the swarms of public world that is being roundly thumped by the evil school brats festering in the sun mere minutes away sorcerer Voldemort (incidentally, according to from the peace of my poolside reading sanctum. How I Rowling the correct method of pronunciation is in the was to preserve my dignity while satisfying my urge to French manner, excluding the ‘t’, as this ‘adds devour the book whole was quite beyond me. After a menace’). Strange, gloomy weather and a series of couple of nail-chewing hours I looked like a heroin unexplained natural disasters nationwide add to the addict getting the shakes. I was putty growing sense of unease. We are in the grip of Ms Rowling’s fantasy, ‘We can’t be pretending spared the usual warm-up chapter at and so, clad in a dark, concealing to enjoy the Booker the Dursley’s and flung this time garb, shading my bloodshot eyes headlong into the Prime Minister’s behind a pair of enormous novelty shortlist all the time’ office with the new Minister for sunglasses, I made my way down to the local libraria, Magic, and a story in which Harry battles evil, suffers (bookshop) and handed over what at the time I would many complicated plot twists and emerges one or two have considered (had I been fully conscious of the friends fewer at the other end, ready for the last exchange rate) a whopping €30. instalment. Some loose ends in this expanding universe of walk-on characters and magical gossip To the uninitiated, it is difficult to empathise with the needed to be tied up, certainly, but there are still plenty ecstasy of a Potterista falling upon a fresh instalment. left to occupy volume seven. The experience is so intense that I can well imagine it compares to great landmarks such as marriage or the Our hero’s violently adolescent behaviour can be birth of a child, but without any of the expense, sweat, confusing, even for a fellow teenager, but, given our or post-natal depression. own rapid mood swings, this can be forgiven, and is 30 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 thankfully less prominent than in HP5 (‘TOOTP’ for CHIPS, PEAS & QUEUES those in the know). Although given the twists and turns of the plot, and the bleak outlook for them all, Yoghurt. Not, I admit, an easy food to serve well – I it’s not surprising that Harry is a bit grumpy mean, you have to open a container and decant the sometimes. stuff into bowls. Okay, it also helps if you keep it “Anyone else we know died” enquires Ron at one refrigerated so that it can be preserved for as long as point, when he sees Hermione reading the Daily possible and served, from the same batch, for weeks Prophet. For a ‘children’s book’ this one is on end. However, despite years of building up remarkably brutal, killing off a major character, and acquired tastes unique to Hall – chicken lasagne, putting Harry (along with his readers) through the sardine bagel rarebit, etc – I did suspect that this mental blender. Characteristically, this novel is particular yoghurt was not supposed to taste like remarkably long for its genre: months of father-son unripened berries in mayonnaise. Mmmm. In fact, I bedtime readings-aloud there, then. However, the was feeling so generous that I let the others on my author’s talent for storytelling easily transcends any table have a taste. Our conclusion, backed by reliable issues of length. She has a remarkable ability to hold a sources that had attended lunch on Wednesday the reader’s rapt attention, even if, or perhaps partially previous week and had exactly the same stuff, was that because the style is so simple and accessible. perhaps it might just be off. It doesn’t take a Rowling’s characters are compellingly human. They microbiologist to know that yoghurt only keeps for a seem to think what we would done in the few days; a week might just be pushing it a bit. circumstances. Anyway, I took the offensive pudding to some of the white coat wearers in charge of this joint who sent me They all, though, have extraordinary names. There’s away saying that I was ungrateful. Albus Dumbledore (an old English word for a bumblebee), Rubius Hagrid, Dobby the house elf, This kerfuffle was, however, the only complaint I have Professor Flitwick, Ronald Weasley, Draco Malfoy, about the food from the new kitchens, and the only Filch the caretaker, ‘Mad-eye’ Moody and a plethora major one I have heard for a long while. Clearly the of others. And just to think that Baroness Orczy new kitchens are great, and the food has improved managed to propel herself into the literary hall of fame significantly. At any school there are always strong with only the ‘Scarlet Pimpernel’. opinions about the food and the queues to get the food – this is mandatory, it is endemic in schoolboy Rowling manages to create a world in which we can conversation. Ask any kids across the UK about all revel in fantasy, and yet it has become so school food and they’ll tell you that it’s horrific. If mainstream that to know all the characters and they’re not getting given chips dripping in fat, they situations off by heart shows only the faintest whiff of complain, and if there aren’t any peas, or green of trekkieness. She allows us to connect with our inner some kind on the plate then there’s always some children and not have to stand trial for it - live for a sanctimonious expert harping on about nutritious moment in a world that seems only just out of our content – spare me. There are always going to be old reach and let yourself enjoy reading every page of this people fussing over our diet, and governmental health book just the once, cover to cover. Even the eminent tsars grumbling about how the younger generation is reviewer AN Wilson wrote last week in the Telegraph: all becoming obese, when the only factor that we care ‘Comfort reading is not to be despised. We can’t be about is the taste. Look at the hordes that run from pretending to enjoy the Booker shortlist all the time.’ seventh lesson on Wednesday to fill their trays with junk food before the queues start. The fact is that by the start of ‘rush hour’, five past six, there are columns …FIRST IMPRESSIONS… of boys stretching as far back as the eye can see. Removes, those slapstick comedians, are inevitably “The food can be great but has its days. There is pushing each other around and causing involuntary always something that you’d enjoy or maybe enjoy. Mexican waves. This is because of the choice.” Don’t get me wrong – generally the food is great at Radley, and better than any of the schools we “There are a lot more responsibilities compared to religiously deck at rugby each week. And Harrow. prep school. The sermons in Chapel can be quite Queuing, though, is still a bit of a problem. Perhaps boring but it is good to have time to reflect on life.” year groups should be staggered, or more staff put on the serving, or maybe it’s the huge number of options “I have discovered that my typical Radley day is busy that confront us when we finally get to the front of the and lots of fun. It is an exciting challenge. Changing queue that is the problem. Too much choice is the root from the top of the pile to the bottom is so different.” of all evil – now, don’t get me started… 31 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE AN INTERVIEW WITH DFL

When did you first come to the school? Ronnie Howard long to sort things out. He came in I came in January 1956. In those days quite a few boys 1960 just as I left and within two years Radley were left at Christmas after taking Oxbridge scholarship or right at the top winning the Princess Elizabeth Cup at entrance exams so there was still a three term entry Henley. into the school with some more boys arriving in the summer term. How did you get involved in coaching at Radley? I started coaching here as a boy. In my last year I Why Radley? coached several scullers in B. In my last term I had a I took a Scholarship to Charterhouse in summer 1955. knee injury and, not being able even to scull on the The whole experience was a complete nightmare and, river (since rowing was then not an option in the of course, I was not successful. At the same time John Michaelmas Term), I coached Colts Rugby alongside Kenyon (Sewell Scholar 1956) took a Scholarship to James Batten (who became Head of King’s, Taunton) Eton and also failed. Stowe had been highly favoured and Simon Langdale (who became Head of by the Headmaster of my prep school, Mostyn House, Eastbourne and then Shrewsbury). This was when I which is on the Wirral peninsula at Parkgate. Both the realised I could coach people who had more ability Headmaster and Sir George Kenyon were ORs but did than me. not approve of what was going on at Radley in the I have always been interested in Radley rowing, early fifties under Warden Wilkes. When Wyndham keeping in touch with it first through Ronnie Howard Milligan became Warden he at once attracted a and then JKM, but in 1991 there was all change and number of boys such as John Kenyon and myself to JKM was forced into the background. Radley. So I arrived in B Social in January 1956 and was awarded an Exhibition largely on the strength of In 1995 my nephew, Edward Legget, who was an my Classics. John stayed on and took the Scholarship Exhibitioner in B, rowed in the J16s. They had done externally. I should add that Radley then was very really well at J14 level, but had a poor J15 season. different from the hugely popular and successful AJM took them on as J16s in 1995 and I asked him if school it has now become. he would like a bit of help. They beat all other J16s easily and were much faster than our 2nd VIII, so they When did you first start rowing? were entered for the PE at Henley in the days when a school could enter as many VIIIs as they liked. The Midgets played Rugby for the first few weeks of Amazingly they beat Westminster and Latymer 1st the Lent Term but then took to the river or played VIIIs to reach the Friday when they lost to St Joseph’s, Hockey. I can recall being shoved out in one of B USA. Even so, they were recording very similar times Social’s ‘Fennies’ by JKM’s elder brother and falling to the 1st VIII who also went out on the Friday. in after only going about 20 metres! We had loads of wet-bobs in B (a hangover from when it was Eason’s. It seemed to me and others that AJM and I could work Jo Eason coached the 1st VIII for many years. Rowing well together, so I suggested to the Warden that AJM was organised by Socials in those days and there were should coach the 1st VIII with some help from me and probably well over 250 boys rowing out of a school that the 1st VIII coach be directed off to the J16s and numbering about 480.) None of the current leave at the end of the year. alternatives, such as Badminton or Golf or Cross Country, were available to younger boys. You were How has the Boat Club changed since you came to either a Wet-Bob or a Dry-Bob. You took ‘Exercise’ Radley? every day. You had to record what you had done. If After a fairly disastrous first year I brought in Harry you had not done what you stated you were severely Mahon to help AJM and myself with the Senior punished. Squad. Within 12 months we had won National Later in the Summer I was 3rd or 4th in Junior Sculls, Schools with the 1st and 2nd VIIIs. For the next seven which was a timed race from 2nd to 4th Gates. We had years after that all Radley crews continued to win a a ‘Race-Off in B as to who should represent B Social steady stream of medals. in Junior Sculls – a side-by-side knockout. I won this We had a successful formula that was emulated by all and ultimately that event. I progressed into the Colts in the other age groups and Harry was a tremendous help ‘57 and ‘58 and then the 1st VIII in ‘59 and ‘60. I right up to his tragic death in May 2001. I still think, reckon I rowed about 8 or 9 external races in my entire “What would Harry do now?” whenever there are any rowing career at Radley and I always seemed to run up problems against and lose to Shrewsbury, Eton or Teddies who were the prominent forces in those days. It did not take 32 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005

If you could change two things at the school, what Gold Medals in their two Coupe races. would they be? 1. Most Radleians are pleasant and polite, but I do feel What, or who, do you regard as your greatest that they tend to look scruffy if allowed to do so. Hair coaching success? is too long on some and shirts, etc are not always done There have been quite a few so I have picked out up. I also find that it is extremely difficult to three. First, helping Derek Drury turn Leander Cadets distinguish any boy who is a School Prefect and who around in 1968 with a blisteringly fast crew that won has any authority but that is probably me being old- the first of three successive Thames Cups. Second, fashioned. putting together the CUBC/Mladost (Croatia) 4- to win the Stewards at Henley in five outings in 1995. 2. Proper games kit seems to be issued for the Rugby, This crew beat GB 4- which included the Searles, Tim Cricket, Hockey and Football teams. This is more Foster (that’s three Olympic Gold Medallists!) and controversial down at the River since everyone in the Rupert Obholzer in the Record time of 6.22, a record world who rows is accustomed to buying direct from which has never since even been touched. But third, the manufacturer without Shop putting its mark-up on. and probably my proudest moment, was when the Shop has to exist and cover its costs but the situation Radley ‘98 crew came back from nearly two lengths to me is very unsatisfactory. down to beat St Mary’s, USA, to win the Princess Elizabeth for the first time since 1962. Who do you currently coach both at Radley and on the outside? If you had to sum up a Radleian in ten words or less, At Radley my brief is to help all the coaches with their what would you say? crews and this year I hope to be much more involved Nice blokes who seem easy-going but respond to again with the Senior Squad (which looks like being stimulus. numerically higher than it has been for years) plus the J16s and J15s. Otherwise I have helped (with AJM) What would be your ideal meal? Magdalen College, Oxford to go Head of the River in Summer Eights for the past two years with three ORs Something like Avocado – Roast Duck – Raspberries in their stern three. They train at Radley so it is just a and cream with some really top class wine! question of fitting them in when I am not coaching Radley. I have coached the Cambridge Squad ever What do you think about the Olympics coming to since January 1968. In those days I started both crews Dorney in 2012? in the first 10 days of January on the Cam and for the The Olympics in GB is bound up with the first six years both Cambridge and Goldie won, often infrastructure of all sports. At present Eton’s lake, by huge margins. Then came the great Oxford run which is privately owned, is the only 2,000m from 1976 to 1992 and I was coaching 2 or 3-week international course in England. Caversham will soon periods in January or February then. All the CUBC be open but only for GB and OUBC crews, which is coaches then were amateur and only being paid a no use to me! Courses have been discussed ad contribution to their (not inconsiderable) expenses. nauseam at Cambridge and Bedford. It seems the The first professional was employed as a coach by Bedford one might now become a reality and it would Cambridge in 1989 and in 1991 he asked me to be be great if the Cambridge lake happened too. As to the much more involved with Goldie. That started a run of Eton course, it is built on the wrong axis, which makes wins with Goldie in the ’90s when the OUBC ignored it susceptible to side winds. This is marginally worse Isis. I have always coached the Blue Boat guys as well than rowing with a prevailing head or tail wind such as because we coach as a team and row as a squad – one usually has at Nottingham. All man-made courses something I have insisted upon at Radley. are susceptible to wind – I remember being at the Munich Olympics in 1972 where there was a stand All this is not to say I don’t help others when asked filed with 30,000 people (most of them German). That and if I have time. I coached Exeter University under course is built on the right axis but that week suffered their President Harry Mee (OR) at Henley this year strange cross headwinds that made things difficult. and they certainly increased in speed enough to qualify in the Temple. I have declined coaching the GB Junior Finally, have you anything else to say to our readers? Squad since this is unpaid and takes a huge chunk out of the summer – I doubt if I would now be asked Well, I am known as someone who does not mince his again, but that does not bother me! But I continue to words. I feel we are standing still at Radley with most go to the GB Trials with Radleians and it is always of our sports. APT, Drama, Music, etc. all have to rewarding when they gain places in GB crews like have their time priorities and among the sports Rowing Paddy Montgomery did in the Coupe 4- and Chris is the one that consumes the most time and physical Hobbs in the Coupe 8+ – the two of them won two effort. Also, there are huge pressures of work and 33 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE league tables to think of – it never ceases to amaze me de rosée à mon front…”etc.). After a year teaching in a that boys who seem semi-literate when they arrive law firm in Madrid and playing rugby for the Madrid leave with a stream of As and Bs. But if Radley has Lions RFC, we are glad to have him back in the pretensions of winning the PE again then sometime in Modern Languages department as an enthusiastic the future the age-old problem of three term rowing is young don. going to rear its head again. Unless you know what you are up against you cannot quite understand that it RE is one thing to win at National Schools and another to René Eagle is the new Pastoral Housemistress in E beat the best that comes from overseas at Henley. Our Social. She comes to Radley after working for many crews in 2000 and 2001 were never even over-lapped years in a co-educational school in Surrey. After a here. They were clearly faster than the 1998 crew and initial few weeks of settling in, she says, ‘the Radley won National Schools as they liked (as did the 2nd charm has worked its magic and I am totally under its VIII) but St Joseph’s USA and King’s Parramatta from spell. The boys of E Social are great.’ Australia proved to be too fast for them at Henley so they were only the national but not international best. Her interests include reading, going to the theatre, There is no doubt in my mind that three term rowing swimming, rambling and dancing. will eventually come. There is SO MUCH one can do to make huge progress before Christmas. Just look at a SAG Calendar and you will see there are 12-13 weeks this term, about 10 next term plus a week’s camp and then After reading Classics at Queen’s University, Belfast, 4-5 weeks to National Schools. Stephen Graham left Northern Ireland to train as a teacher at Cambridge. His student placement was at I rest my case, but then not all are as passionate about Norwich School, and he loved the city of Delia and the the sport as I am and always have been. Canaries so much that he stayed there for four more happy years. Boarding school life is quite a new experience for him but his upbringing on a County NEW DONS – PART II Down farm, where he was surrounded by twenty relatives and quite a few other mammals, has helped The Chronicle would like to welcome the new members him to settle quickly into G Social. Interests include of Common Room and their families to Radley, and music, travel and the developing world. introduce them by publishing short profiles: six were printed in the last issue. EVH ECB Lizzie Honeycombe schooled in Suffolk before a degree in English Literature and Heritage Elodie Bécret comes to Radley from the Lycée Sainte Management. She enjoys many sports but is passionate Geneviève in Paris. She is a History graduate and about cricket – coaching at Notts County CC after “needs” (as she says) a break before becoming a university while working freelance for Sky Sports and primary school teacher. She hopes that teaching some writing for a cricket magazine. She lived on a farm in French to Radleians will be an unforgettable Hertfordshire and worked for the National Farmers’ experience... Union before coming to Radley in September as the Pastoral Housemistress in B Social. SHD Simon Dalrymple first came to Radley in 1996 when Lizzie is interested in history and art, fond of the odd he was 13. Within 4 years he had become Head of H glass of wine, and, under the surface, nurtures an Social, he hooked for Bigside, struck for the 1st XI unhealthy passion for superbikes. With her comes hockey and batted number 3 for the 1st XI cricket. Bertie Wooster, already notorious in B Social for Despite his considerable ludic commitments, he being slightly crazy with no fear, sense or brain. Bertie managed to find time to read a few books and with the is a one-year-old tabby. help of an impressive section 10 (see ‘A Very Personal Statement’ in the last edition of the Chronicle) gained SK a place at Christ Church, Oxford to read French and Sholto Kerr comes to Radley as Head of German from Spanish. As an undergraduate he continued to hone his Reigate Grammar School, where he taught German skills as a cricketer and a rugby player while and French for 10 years. He attended Birmingham and developing a special interest in 19th century French Hamburg Universities, and in a previous life worked poetry (he is often heard in the department quoting for American Express in Hamburg and London. Other “Ma Bohème” while typing emails or writing reports qualifications include skiing in Austria for a season, “ces bons soirs de septembre où je sentais des gouttes diving in Sharm-el-Sheik, a love of racket sports,

34 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 parachuting, travelling the world (America, most of JIM McCOOL – ‘IONIAN TALES’ Europe, Australia & New Zealand so far), reading the OCTOBER 6, STUDIO THEATRE Lord of the Rings trilogy one summer holiday, and personally hacking out a multi-coloured piece of the He was certainly different; I’ll give him that. The Berlin Wall. sapped look on Mrs Sargent’s face as we enter the Studio Theatre says it all; she had entertained our EJS guest performer for two hours and arrived looking like Ed Schneider took up the post of Development the living dead. Her will to live was clearly at a low Director in August after 18 months in the same role at ebb. Some of us start to wonder. St Albans High School for Girls. Ed spent ten years We file along the back row of chairs, arranged in a teaching history in the US before moving to the UK to horseshoe (a thoughtful touch of the English study Art History. He joined Christie’s, the art auction department to consider his rural background) and are house, as managing director of Christie’s Images. immediately shuffled forward to the front by various Before moving into development he ran his own holders of supreme authority. A bright red silky marketing consultancy, Focus Marketing. bowling jacket stands drooped over a chair with the Born and raised in the US, Ed has lived in the UK back towards us, so that we can see his name since 1990. He is very excited about the possibilities embossed on the back of it. An overwhelming sense of and challenges presented by development at Radley dread wells up within me. and looks forward to becoming part of the Radley community. Ed has two daughters, currently being The man enters accompanied by a wan JMFB. He educated in the US, and is married to Jenny, a writer. pulls a tambourine out of his bag – bad sign – and begins to yodel. Turns out he’s not a poet, but an Irish yodeller. He sings a folksong accompanying himself on the tambourine; I thought we were in for some performance poetry, not Worzel Gummidge. No, I …FIRST IMPRESSIONS… don’t want to be broadened, where’s my Keats? Ten seconds in and the entire room have gone scarlet with “Radley is top quality but some refs need to read the suppressed mirth. I am struggling to breathe. Tears rule book again: the Harrow ref was Irish!” welling up in eyes. Kill me now. Just kill me now. After a few ballads the audience participation kicks in. “Rugby is good, lots of injuries though.” I clap woefully out of time. I appeal to God. There are more and more of these songs; he seems to have the “IT still uses OS9 on almost all Macs – OSX or entire cultural history of Ireland stored in that soul- Windows are far easier to use.” destroying head. Time does not stop, despite illusions. He turns now to a piece of his original work. I can tell “When I arrived at Radley it was hard to find my you now, with great authority, there is at least one fate lessons but being surrounded by older people who are worse than death. He proudly claims that this is one helpful really makes things easier.” tale from his own version of the Canterbury Tales. Er, OK. So, after hundreds of years of critical acclaim, a small time yodeller can do it better than Chaucer. He “I loved it from the beginning but there is a lot of prep can’t. but lots of time to do it.” Fifteen minutes of absurd rhymes and lyrics, which he calls “The Boxer’s Tale.” At last it ends and he asks, “My wallet disappeared yesterday – just like magic. “is that all we’ve got time for?” (Yes it is.) JMFB, The supper queues move backwards: that’s magic assembling a politely regretful face, nods and so he too.” says, “I’ll just play one more before the end then.” Three chairs along Mr Collings buries his face in his hands and groans audibly. No, nice Mr Yodeller, “Upper years are intimidating but are OK if you are we’ve run out of time, dear boy. The one last ballad not arrogant.” turns out to be about Robbie Burns, sex and porridge – the ‘porridge’ in the poem apparently is code for bonking. It ends. Smiles, applause and relief all round. “The food is good. My bed is comfy. It was great winning the Haddon Cup.” Except that I was lucky enough to be volunteered by JMFB to help get his stuff back to the car.

35 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE THE HADDON CUP 2005 SUNDAY OCTOBER 9, THE OLD GYM THE FIRST HALF – E, C, B & G actor’ of the evening. His rendition of MC Hammer’s Can’t Touch This was a moment that will haunt me for To write about the Haddon Cup is an extremely the rest of my born days. The rest of the C Social daunting task. The prospect of doing so filled me with Shells gave a commendable performance in the form dread every time I thought about it during the week of assorted greenery. Oh, and the Dog, Toto. Special leading up to the performances. The overriding mention must be made of Ed Chalk’s entertainingly thought was of myself, knackered, sitting in an surreal programme. overcrowded Old Gym watching a series of rather dubious plays, ranging from mediocre to downright B Social – 101 Dalmatians. This was an ambitious appalling. This year I was most pleasantly surprised. performance as it is an extremely difficult play to fit Having endured the three previous years of poor into a small time period. This abridged extract worked acting, forgotten lines and cheap gags, this year was a on the assumption that the audience knew the plot. refreshing eye-opener. For the first year I can Cruella (Alex Murison) was played extremely well, remember, each play was good, and there was no proving to be frighteningly similar to the Disney obvious winner. All the performances I watched in the creation. One of the aspects of this performance that first half were extremely close, and I would have impressed the most was the simple use of collar found it difficult to choose a winner from those four, ribbons to signify the puppies, rather than elaborate as they were of such high quality. attempts at dog costumes. The cues and dialogue was very slick, with Pongo (Will Eden) and Missus E Social’s performance of Teechers seemed to be (Jonathan Quicke) pulling of a very touching double thoroughly enjoyed by all. The actors maintained their act. In fact, so impressed were some with young accents, and some were convincing, particularly Quicke that he was selected to read at the Nelson Mass through the play. The play balanced humour with, on the evidence of this performance. well, more humour, as is usually the style of this G Social performed an extract from The Madness of evening. My only criticism with this production would George III – famously renamed for the Americans The be the cutting of the script. I found myself lost in Madness of King George because they might imagine certain places, and I have seen the play before: I can’t they had missed the first two instalments of the imagine the difficulty some of the parents had. trilogy... This was very well staged – almost too much Otherwise, this play was well done, and was an so, in fact, since it smacked of the positioning and extremely good note to start the evening on, setting a style of a GCSE drama piece. The acting area was high standard of things to come. defined by a ring of courtiers, with the ailing king in C Social chose The Wizard of Oz. There’s always one his wheelchair at the centre. His advisors, wife and (last year it was D Social’s The Sound of Music). This physician came on and off slickly enough, but there performance smacked of one was not as much excitement about particular 6.1 director’s impact, ‘I have never seen such this piece as some of the others, mixing Liverpudlian accents, Lord of a small woman with despite, or because of, its the Rings soundtracks and MC professionalism. The music, Handel’s Hammer wannabes – a potentially such enormous breasts’ coronation anthem Zadok the Priest, volatile combination. How can all these themes be set the scene very effectively indeed, and, technically linked, while running the story line from The Wizard this was pretty flawless. G Social won for four years in of Oz? a row, with, I remember, ‘serious’ pieces. I am sure they were in the running this year, but perhaps a more Well, the answer is remarkably well. We were treated relaxed approach without the pressure of being the to a feisty Dorothy in the form of Nick Pattinson: I defending champions will help next year. have never seen such a small woman with such enormous breasts, and that accent... I can say with some certainty that was not what L. Frank Baum had in mind when he wrote the play. Nevertheless, Nick THE SECOND HALF – F, H, D & A pulled it off. He played the part extremely well, and portrayed an extremely convincing Dorothy. The The Haddon Cup this year was a major disappointment supporting roles of the Scarecrow (Owen Petty) the to me. As far as parents seemed to be concerned, the Tin Man (Toby Momoh) and the Cowardly Lion (Jack evening had gone swimmingly. Darling Rupert’s Lahif) were entertaining. A special mention must be curtain-pulling and prop-moving had gone perfectly made to Toby Momoh, who gets ‘best supporting (so they had been told) and despite having drunk more than a pint of what they had been assured was ‘wine’, 36 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 they drove home in the highest spirits, busily mercy to the rest of the play. Were the directors aware preparing anecdotes of amateur dramatic excellence to that Nazis actually killed people? How am I to laugh at be spun out at the following evening’s dinner party. that? And if they insisted on a Germanic flavour, Leaving the Old Gym, I watched as one by one, where were the lederhosen? The giant beer tankards? mothers began to shriek like delighted banshees and The platinum-haired busty barmaids? rushed to engulf their sons in a blur of silk scarves I hope you are getting my crudely-made point. and Chanel while embarrassed fathers murmured Certainly there was theatre of a high standard to be congratulations from a distance. had, but where was the soul? Where the badly-timed With all this merriment around me, I could not at first crashes from backstage as the next act got ready? I am understand why I had not enjoyed myself. Was I such all for drama, but I think that you will agree that there a philistine as to be unable to appreciate the drama on is a time and a place for everything, and the Haddon offer? No. Was I simply bitter that my own Haddon Cup (I had always understood) was a celebration of Cup masterpiece had not won? Partly. What is true is team-building, of amateurism, cross-dressing, of wine that the standard this year was extraordinarily high. in the foyer, parents networking – anything except Even I was occasionally forced to peek out from drama. Clearly I was wrong this year, and with the behind my mask of cynicism at times to watch. This move to the new Theatre from next year, it looks to be happened for example when a truly enormous H Social firmly the end of the amateur effort. Let us mourn the Shell beat another in an extremely lifelike fashion, or passing of the Old Gym, and this, probably the last when an F Socialite lit up centre stage (in the smoking evening of drama within her walls, and think of the sense). But there was something amiss. half-century of Haddon Cups and assorted plays that have lived in her. Ladies and Gentlemen, a round of Gradually, I came to understand the root of my applause and a minute’s silence for the Old Gym – disquiet: this year’s Haddon Cup had moved away both at once (you can do that in an article). from its heritage of enormously-breasted stage women and hastily prepared props. Where was the ad lib? It We have neglected to mention the adjudication until had been replaced with well-learnt lines. Oh, A now – it was one of the best of its kind, fair and Social’s traditional Patricia the Stripper, where art complete – thanks to Ms Judy Gray for her skill and thou? Instead of farce, we got parody. In place of kind words about the Shells’ performances. improvisation, there was slick rehearsal, and I, for one, Congratulations, finally, to the stars – this year’s was bitterly disappointed. Shells. With this much dramatic talent in evidence, there is much to look forward to on the stage of the ‘F Social’s play was ‘a very modern approach to the new Theatre over the next five years. idea of chance’ MODERN? IDEAS? So what if it was polished, well rehearsed, and conceptually brilliant (by Haddon Cup standards, it was), it had a concealed moral message, dammit. H Social’s Nicholas Nickleby was another ‘good’ play. Clearly vast amounts of time and effort had been spent on its development. Surely this is completely against the ethics of a Haddon Cup? No play should have passed its most primitive stages of casting more than a week in advance of the big night, and H’s barely concealed preparation should therefore be considered as flagrant cheating. D Social was terrible to watch. People were actually …FIRST IMPRESSIONS… laughing at a Shakespeare comedy. What else is there “Radley feels homely. There is a lot more to say? They performed the ‘mechanicals’ play-within- independence than at my prep school. Not being a-play from A Midsummer Night’s Dream with real forced to wake up at 7 o’clock in the morning is skill, borrowing ideas, admittedly, from last year’s fantastic.” College production, but it was so good that one forgot we were watching Shells perform. “Haddon Cup hurts... I never knew there was a I must take a break whilst contemplating A Social’s trapdoor in the stage.” piece to commend properly the brave soul who sang the excellent solo at the start of The Silver Sword, through which the scene was so perfectly set for the “I have found Radley easy to settle into and my time ensuing drama. However, I will not extend the same has not been plagued with many difficulties.” 37 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE MATHS SOCIETY HOW CAN I GET HOLD OF RONAN CANTWELL (OR) – THE Chronicle? ‘A Career in the Stock Market’ SEPTEMBER 23 The Chronicle is now online: there is a link on the front page of the College Intranet, from which pdf files of the current and previous issues can be downloaded. In essence this talk was a down-to-earth description of the day-to-day life of one of Radley’s more notable If any reader – boy, don, OR, or member of the Further Mathematicians – notable because he ‘always community – would like to ‘subscribe’ (at no charge) had his prep finished by the end of the lesson’ (GW). in order to receive their own printed copy of the Mr Cantwell works for a hedge fund in the City and Chronicle, please let us know via email at { his job is to look at graphs and guess what they’re HYPERLINK "mailto:[email protected]" }. going to do in the future. This task may seem simple enough for all the economists out there used to nice straight lines possibly crossing in the middle at a significant point, but his job is the less menial task of predicting the unpredictable. In fact, the only thing …FIRST IMPRESSIONS… they can accurately foresee, claims Ronan, is what time work finishes. Economists make predictions and “The place is big: I spent 45 minutes finding the link present and future world events to changes in the Precentor’s house.” market; the mathematicians throw their hands in the air and get paid more for it. In effect, with the aid of very little in the way of ‘maths’ as we know it, Ronan “[The work is] harder than I expected. There is a explained how you can have a career in it, be finished massive difference in workload.” at work by three, get rich, and not be an accountant, and all in one lifetime! Very entertaining. “Lots of fun. Because we are at the bottom I thought we’d have less fun than the older years.”

RDS – ‘Fractals and the Mandelbrot Set’ “A new experience. I’ve never been to a single-sex OCTOBER 17 school.”

This talk was about the intriguing concepts of self “I’ve had ups and downs so far, but it always turns similarity and fractals. This is English but, for those of out right eventually.” you who are still learning the language, fractals are objects that have a similar appearance at various stages when zooming in and out of the original, e.g. a fern “The food’s generally fine but I think the puddings leaf, a coastline, or ‘JCN’s jumper’, as RDS put it. He could be better. The library is huge, it has got a great was concerned with measuring the degree of selection of books and I thought my prep school roughness of these objects. It was established in the library was good.” course of the talk that the west coast of Britain is anything from 3000km to several million km long, depending on how big your ruler is. We also learnt “One of the things I thought was good at the start of about the perils of ‘unholy’ numbers and the 2.6th the year has been how all the older boys have helped dimension, as well as the only ‘female’ and been kind around school.” mathematician, Gaston Julia. Musing on complex numbers and the square root of “Radley is quite good but I find it really tiring. It is minus one, RDS pronounced that his subject doesn’t non-stop the whole time. School food isn’t great.” exist. There was some fun with sums and graphs too, and for those of us who got lost after the mention of JCN’s leisurewear, there were colourful pictures to “They worked us too hard in the first couple of weeks. look at and play with. All in all, we were presented We all got too tired.” with a large open window into some of the most interesting aspects of Maths. “Facilities are phenomenal, and I hope I will be able to make the most of them.”

38 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 THE SCHOLARS’ INVITATION CONCERT WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 5, SILK HALL

As is customary every year, in the couple of days with Scriabin’s Piano Prelude no. 13, Andrew Savill following Michaelmas Weekend, Radley’s Music (G) played a Strauss Nocturne with his renowned Scholars prepare the Scholars’ Invitation Concert. The sonorous French horn tone, whilst Francis Forbes- weeks leading up to the event are invariably stressful Edwards (C) played an incredibly hard flute piece by and frantic, particularly for the 6.2 who organises the Tafnel with no mistakes and lots of expression. event; Robert Crabtree (E) ran the show this year. But However it was boy prodigy Arthur Sawbridge (E) despite the short tempers and high nerves created as playing Brahms on the violin who stole the show. He the day of the concert approached, and the somewhat undoubtedly moved and captivated the entire audience last-minute attitude to rehearsal adopted by some of with his dynamic variation and virtuosic style. the performers, the concert is usually a fantastically The concert included three compositions by Mozart, varied, diverse and impressive display of musical the first of which was the Spring Rondo played by the talent. This year was no exception. Wind Trio. It was later performed in Chapel, and has Over past years it has become traditional for the been impressive on both occasions, with a clear and Radley College Pipers to open the major evening well-rehearsed sense of dialogue. The next Mozart concerts. Although these majestic instruments have heard was the most sentimental number of the night been labelled “agony-bags” (and worse) by certain with the Watkiss brothers uniting to treat the audience cynical members of the audience, it is always quite a to the Duet in Bb for Violin and Viola. This is the first spectacle as they confidently march on in their full and time a familial duet has been heard at Radley for quite uninhibitedly Highland get-up. This year they played some time; the Thorns and the Nyes in the Dons’ five traditional numbers including The Colonel and Musical Revue are the only others within memory. The Piper. Finally, Jonathan Williams (H) played the distinctly operatic first movement of Mozart’s Piano Sonata in After the pipers had blown away any musical cobwebs C with a wide range of dynamics and articulation, and with deafening decibels we were transported from pulling off all the quick passages with elegant Scotland to America by Freddie Tapner (F) playing the phrasing. He was as technically secure as ever, and it jazzy Feelin’ Good by Bonsor. The concert also ended is always a treat to hear him play. with a jazz item played by the curious Jazz Quintet (curious’? There were four of them). Soloist Callum The two large ensembles were the Wind Quintet, who Davidson (D) played tenor sax with ‘Stan Getz-esque’ did a typically ‘SVC’ 20th Century number with purity of tone and lyricism, accompanied musically by unusual harmonies and dynamics; and the Baroque drummer Charlie Oakes (G) and double bassist Ensemble, which played a movement from Alastair Holmes (G). Meanwhile Adrian Pascu (B) Telemann’s Trio Sonata in G minor. What was created a sea of harmony underneath with well chosen particularly delightful was the presence of the voicings, as well as impressing with a complicated harpsichord, rarely heard in Silk Hall performances. solo. Pascu had a jazz-bar pianist’s characteristic The other Baroque item was Vivaldi’s Vivace played ‘foot-tap’ which added to the cool ambience, although charmingly by Jonathan Wong (A) on the violin. AJAW is less than impressed with his habit of tapping It was an impressive and lengthy concert. One would the piano’s pedals rather than the floor. have thought that such a large programme would have The evening featured three contrasting singing solos, led to tense shuffling in the seats and surreptitious the soloists being Alex Easdale (A, tenor), Benjamin watch-checking, but there was none of it: we were Sheen (C, counter tenor) and Robert Crabtree (E, captivated throughout. The music this evening showed baritone). Easdale’s soaring tenor voice delighted all the strength and variety of the current music scholars’ and Sheen hit the high notes flawlessly, a difficult task interests. to do with a countertenor voice. Crabtree sang Pur dicesti, a bocca bella by Pergolesi, a charming number that was to win him the Ferguson Singing Prize a week …FIRST IMPRESSIONS later. We were also introduced to the charismatic stage presence and excellent voice of William Storey D), “Being at the bottom of the food chain makes life singing in the recently formed ‘Radley Funk Band’ harder but it’s fun all the same” who performed a Stevie Wonder track with bravado and great aplomb. “Only one teacher scares me. I hate mornings. Food is Romantic solo music featured frequently in the standard.” programme. Theo Whitworth (C) impressed early on 39 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE

CORRESPONDENCE

Correspondence is invited from any interested parties: please send contributions via email to [email protected]. Correspondents are welcome to use a pseudonym but must make their identity known to the Editors.

To the Editors of ‘The Radley College Chronicle’ Dear Sirs,

Dear Sirs, In recent years those of us that go to breakfast have been confronted in Covered Passage on 1st XV match We are told that Chapel is one of the first places we days by an array of dubious photographs, often of will return to when we visit Radley after we leave. players in states of undress. I, for one, have found it Most Radleians ask why. Apparently it is because it is unappetising to witness a set of spotty buttocks when with Chapel that we feel the greatest sense of about to grapple with my morning sausage, so I am ‘tradition and routine’ while we are here, and that relieved that a degree of self-censorship is now being stays with us. Why, then, do we now have only one exercised and we now normally face fully clothed ‘traditional’ service – i.e. one free of a musical recital sportsmen. (That said, there is now less material for or patronising talk – a week? This is not just a boy’s amateur psychosexologists to speculate on). complaint; it has been noticed that a distinguished member of Common Room attends Chapel only on Nevertheless, I imagine I am not alone in still being Thursdays now. I, for one, think this bored by the repeated images of is a great shame, and that the powers gurning public schoolboys caught on that be should rethink the schedule. camera, often apparently worse the Yours sincerely, wear for drink. What purpose does this serve, other than self- THOMAS SPENDLOVE advertisement? I can’t imagine it C Social encourages support. After all, the hockey players, footballers, cricketers and rowers don’t inflict this kind of Dear Sirs, thing on College for the rest of the As I am sure you are aware the format of our weekday year. Is it not time for the rugger players to desist Chapel services has changed quite considerably in entirely from their solipsistic wallpapering? recent weeks. I would like to ask the senior Yours hopefully, management, is it not enough that we are forced into attending a service in worship to a God that many have ‘AESTHETE’ not chosen to worship? Now we must listen to this same assumed truth in a new and more ‘youth friendly’ version that makes even less sense than The editors would like to add that there are a wide range of views before. I would ask the new Chaplain to stop inflicting around College – both favourable and critical – on the various his own brand of worship on the rest of us. changes introduced in Chapel this term, but that the Chronicle can only publish the letters that are sent to us. We invite further Yours sincerely, correspondence on this topic. In an article in the next issue we intend to examine in detail the points being put forward from all ‘AN AGNOSTIC’ sides. 40 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005

Dear Sirs, In the first issue of the Chronicle last term ‘Snappy place look so much more colourful. The custom that Dresser’ complained of the general scruffiness around Shells wore tweed so they could be recognised as such college. Gone are the days of the judicious shirt/tie has also died out. combination or the well-cut suit, it seems, but is this Perhaps the Sixth Form, or at any rate the top year, not partially due to the stringent dress codes imposed could be allowed to have more say in the manner in on us? which they dress themselves? More liberty would, I After all, we are constantly told that it is important to am sure, encourage more creativity and ultimately be well dressed, in order to give a good impression of more smartness. As it is, we can only indulge our ourselves and the school. Yet Radley hardly allows passion for clashing combinations on Sundays or scope for sartorial improvisation of the kind that we all holidays (unless one is a Pup, whose waistcoats have admire in the History department. Coloured socks are recently blinded many of us), but were we to be banned, even though they are smarter than the bog- allowed more freedom, we could get it all out of our standard anklewear available in Shop. Ties, similarly, system before emerging impeccably dressed and are restricted to school ones: black and dark blue. Not stylish, and clutching our string of As as we hit the very nice, and no single one of us is entitled to wear big, bad world. many of the “seventy-plus” college ties that, Yours elegantly, apparently, there are. Worst of all, they are all polyester. Woven silk should at least be an option. As ‘BEAU BRUMMELL’ for the “dark blue or black” ties we can wear from home, that seems to be missing the point. Dark blue is Dear Sirs, dull, while black – well, one does not wear a black tie except if you are at a funeral (or a pupil at Harrow I should be at Wednesday supper now, but I’ve been School). put off by the hundred-strong queue reminiscent of a Soviet bread line. Most of the people queuing for their This commentator must also lament the quality of dose of burger are Shells or Removes. This should not school suits and the decline of the tweed jacket. be the case – we used to have a system where the School suits, as in the ones available in Shop, are, to younger years had a set time to go to Supper. This was be honest, not brilliantly cut; there is something in the days of the old servery, yet the queues were distinctly uninspiring about them. Double-breasted is, smaller. Would it be hopelessly old-fashioned to ask at any rate, not ideal for the growing boy; they either for this to be reinstated? look too small or too big. Thankfully most people have discarded them by the Removes. Tweed, similarly, is Yours, hardly ever to be seen, which is a shame; it makes the ‘RONALD McDONALD’

Dear Sirs, Radley’s skyline cannot really compare with Manhattan, or Rome, or even, for that matter, Oxford. Whatever its merits, no one can really say that the new Theatre improves things very much, either. Things were more interesting when E Social still had a spire. A spire on E Social? Yes – on top of the tower that has CRB’s study at the bottom (formerly Pups’ Study). The enclosed photograph shows it clearly. Even now you can see the stub where it used to be. Perhaps it is time to campaign to have it rebuilt?

Yours observantly, ‘NIMROD’ 41 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE RUGBY RESULTS ANALYSIS Radley College v Oratory School: Radley College v Lord Wandsworth College played: 12, won: 7, drew: 1, lost: 4 played: 3, won: 2, drew: 0, lost: 1

Radley College v Harrow School Radley College v Cheltenham College played: 21, won: 5, drew: 0, lost: 16 played: 12, won: 11, drew: 0, lost: 1

RESULTS IN BRIEF 1st XV Colts 1st XV Junior Colts 1st XV Saturday 8th October Saturday 8th October Saturday 8th October v Oratory (H) v Oratory (A) v Oratory (A) drew 15-15 lost 8-13 won 11-5 Saturday 15th October Saturday 15th October Saturday 15th October v Harrow (A) v Harrow (H) v Harrow (H) lost 5-20 won 12-3 lost 12-15 Thursday 20th October Thursday 20th October Thursday 20th October v Cheltenham (H) v Cheltenham (H) v Cheltenham (A) won 25-8 won 22-3 Won 11-5

2nd XV Colts 2nd XV Junior Colts 2nd XV Saturday 15th October Saturday 8th October Saturday 15th October v Harrow (H) v Oratory (A) v Harrow (H) won 15-14 won 11-3 lost 14-22 Thursday 20th October Saturday 15th October v Cheltenham (A) v Harrow (H) Junior Colts 3rd XV won 27-14 lost 6-31 Saturday 8th October v Oratory (A) 3rd XV Colts 3rd XV won 34-28 Saturday 8th October Saturday 8th October Saturday 15th October v Oratory (H) v Lord Wandsworth (A) v Harrow (H) won 19-18 won 43-0 lost 5-29 Saturday 15th October Saturday 15th October Thursday 20th October v Harrow (A) v Harrow (H) V Cheltenham (A) lost 6-10 lost 17-19 won 12-10 Thursday 20th October Thursday 20th October v Cheltenham (A) v Cheltenham (H) Junior Colts 4th XV won 29-19 won 31-10 Saturday 8th October v Lord Wandsworth (A) 4th XV Colts 4th XV won 50-0 Saturday 15th October Saturday 8th October Saturday 15th October v Harrow (A) v Oratory (A) v Harrow (H) won 20-14 won 36-0 lost 5-30 Saturday 15th October Thursday 20th October Stonewall 1st XV v Harrow (H) v Cheltenham (A) Saturday 15th October won 24-12 won 58-5 v Harrow (A) Thursday 20th October won v Cheltenham (H) Junior Colts 5th XV won 12-7 Stonewall 2nd XV Saturday 8th October v Oratory (A) Saturday 8th October lost 7-31 v Oratory (H) lost 25-17 Saturday 15th October v Harrow (H) Saturday 15th October lost 10-31 v Harrow (A) lost 0-19 42 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE 31 October 2005 Midgets 1st XV RACKETS Saturday 8th October v Oratory (H) Thursday 29th September won 20-0 v Rugby (A) Dance & Stallibrass (1st pair) lost to Hawkesly & Murphy Saturday 15th October 12/15, 9/15, 15/8, 6/15, 16/17. (1-4) v Harrow (A) Strang & North (Colts) beat Stonor & Carver lost 5-10 15/3, 15/10, 15/10, 15/3. (4-0) Thursday 20th October Hackett & Manners (Junior Colts) lost to Corcoran & Winstanly v Cheltenham (H) 4/15, 15/3, 15/10, 10/15, 14/17. (2-3) won 15-7 Thursday 6th October v Winchester (H) Midgets 2nd XV Dance & Strang (1st pair) beat Morse & Cartwright Saturday 15th October 15/7, 15/8, 13/18, 11/15, 15/2, 6/15, 15/8. (4-3) v Harrow (A) Holbech & Hackett (Junior Colts) lost to Knight & Portz lost 0-50 9/15, 1/15, 1/15. (0-3) Donger & Eccles-Williams (Midgets 1) lost to Jesty & Portz Midgets 3rd XV 2/15, 17/18, 15/10, 15/8, 3/15. (2-3) Saturday 8th October Norton & MacDonald-Milner (Midgets 2) lost to Morse & Wyld v Oratory (H) 8/15, 13/18, 10/15. (0-3) lost 0-27 Thursday 13th October Saturday 15th October v Eton (H) v Harrow (A) Dance & Stallibrass (1st pair) lost (0-4) to lost 14-31 Burgess & Redmayne, 4/15, 7/15, 11/15, 9/15. Strang & Pritchard (Colts) beat (3-1) Thursday 20th October Higson & Powell-Brett, 15/6, 15/17, 15/12, 15/4. v Cheltenham (H) Holbech & Hackett (Junior Colts) lost (0-3) to lost 10-22 Hopton & Pugh, 14/17, 2/15, 2/15. Norton & Roupell (Midgets) lost (2-3) to Midgets 4th XV Faber & Crichton, 18/13, 15/11, 7/15, 16/18, 0/15. Saturday 15th October v Harrow (A) lost 0-49 SQUASH Thursday 20th October Thursday 22nd September v Cheltenham (H) v Harrow (H) won 45-5 Seniors lost 0-5 Juniors lost 0-5 Midgets 5th XV Thursday 6th October Saturday 8th October v Cheltenham (A) v Oratory (H) Seniors lost 1-4 won 36-7 U15s lost 0-5 U14s won 3-2 Saturday 15th October v Harrow (A) Thursday 13th October lost 5-19 v St Edward’s (A) Seniors won 4-1 Midgets 6th XV Juniors won 3-2 Saturday 8th October v Lord Wandsworth (H) REAL TENNIS lost 12-14 Thursday 13th October Saturday 15th October v Oratory, drew (1-1) v Harrow (A) J Manners & J Crisp v M Conway & A Montourlis lost 2-4 lost 0-29 E Lyle & R Edwards v M Conway & A Montourlis won 4-3 Sunday 16th October v Oratory, drew (3-3) T Dance & J Stallibrass v C Coupland & B Howell won 6-3 E Crichton & J Stallibrass v C Coupland & C Whittaker won 6-4 O Hunter & H Nicholls v F diStefano & G Williams lost 1-6 J Stallibrass & H Nicholls v B Howell & C Whittaker lost 3-6 E Crichton & O Hunter v C Coupland & G Williams lost 1-6 J Stallibrass & H Nicholls v F diStefano & B Howell won 6-2 43 31 October 2005 THE RADLEY COLLEGE CHRONICLE EDITORS OF INDEX The Radley College Chronicle Vol. II No. 1 4 October 2005 Rupert Barwood (G), Thaddeus Cooper (D), Tom Dance (H), Dunluce Eccles (E), Rupert Harrison (F), Harry Potter: A Half-Hearted Comparison 1 Robert Hewlett (D), Edward Holman (F), Matthew A Poll on Security 3 Johnson (G), Tom McPhail (H), Frederick Moynan Overheard… 3 (B), Tom Muir (D), Adrian Pascu (B), Tom Spendlove No Ordinary Place? 4 Michaelmas Blues 5 (C), Chris Sykes (B), Will Tanner (F), Stephen Tracy Progress Report on the New Pavilion & Theatre 6 (F), Tristan Wood (C), Luke Bartlett and Ian Yorston. East End Development 7 Sub-editors: Myles Dowley (A), Alex Sants (B), Ed Philosophy in Action 7 Chalk (C), Ed Kerr (C), Jonathan Williams (H) and A Very Personal Statement 8 Here & There 8 Sam Radclyffe (H). If any 6.1 or 6.2 is interested in New Dons 9 becoming an editor or finding out more about what New Noise Concert 9 that entails, please contact one of the editors. Perplexed: ‘the Biology of Sex’ 10 Contributions and correspondence on any topic are A New College Newspaper 10 Romania: Piatra Neamt 11 welcomed from all current or former members of the Romania: Buzau 11 Radley community: please send to our email address, Romania: A Don’s Perspective 13 [email protected], or to ‘The Editors, TRCC, A Tutor’s Diary, Part III, ‘The Order of the Bath’ 14 Radley College, Abingdon, Oxon. OX14 2HR’. Odds & Ends 15 Correspondence 16 Articles and letters will, for the most part, be Sailing: Summer Tour Report 17 published anonymously, and any views expressed do Sailing Results 17 not necessarily reflect official school policy. Rugby Results 18 Rackets Results 20 Editors 20 Index 20

Vol. II No. 2 31 October 2005

Conservatives at Prayer 21 Social Stereotypes – 1. The Rower 22 First Impressions – throughout the issue 22 A Poll about the Shells 23 Overheard… 23 Michaelmas Reds 24 October Diary 25 The Ferguson Singing Prize: Inters & Seniors 26 Reviews of VI.2 Lectures 28 The Angell Piano Trio 29 Review: ‘Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince’ 30 Chips, Peas and Queue 31 An Interview with DFL 32 New Dons – Part II 34 Jim McCool – Ionian Tales 35 The Haddon Cup 2005 36 Maths Society Talks 38 Scholars’ Invitation Concert 39 Correspondence 40 Rugby Results 42 For those of you interested in such things, this issue of the Rackets, Squash and Real Tennis Results 43

Chronicle contains 180752 words and has been typeset in Microsoft Editors 44 Word using 9, 11, 12, 14, 16 and 18 point ‘Times’. Index 44 We would like to reassure readers that we are not considering a The illustration on page 22 is by Tom Blest (G) move to Berliner format in the near future. The illustrations on page 37, 40 and 44 are by Adrian Pascu (B)

The third issue of Volume II will be published on Monday, 21 November. The deadline for copy and letters is the preceding Wednesday evening, 16 November. © Radley College 2005. Printed by Radley Reprographics. 44