$3 What Do You Mean We Don’t Support Your System? We Go To Court When We Have To... $3 The Committed Indian The REal Fan’s Program secondcityhockey.com January 16th, 2009 [email protected] WHAT’S YOUR PRICE FOR FLIGHT, JACKASS? “Well, that was unexpected,” Mayor lumbus case, where a team is strictly built to might be lower than 23rd in goals-per-game, Quimby once said after watching Rex Ban- protect its goalie. The Rangers blue line has where they are now. ner catapulted into the abyss (and yes, we’re continually been the team’s weakness, and But Rangers fans will squarely going to try to start these off with a Simpsons this year is no exception. Michal Rozsival has to the power play as the team’s Achilles Heel. quote as often as we can. Get used to it). We had to wear disguises when out in public in Clearly missing the dominating puck-pos- don’t think anyone saw a chippy, nasty affair for fear of physical violence. Wade session of Jaromir Jagr, the Rangers haven’t between two of the less ornery teams around Redden has been a corpse -- a handsomely figured out another way. They don’t have a coming, but that’s exactly what we got. Obvi- paid corpse, but a corpse nonetheless. Only plus-puck mover on the blue line, or a big ously, Drew Stafford’s hit on Duncan Keith and Paul Mara have been consis- -- Redden couldn’t hit a bull in the ass ramped the animosity up, but the Hawks were tently useful on the back end. Oh, and the with a snow-shovel these days. Add to that being physical before that. It was good to see d-corps is about the softest around, delight- the fact they’ve surrendered 13 shorties, and that when the temperature rises, the Hawks ing Rangers fans to no end. The fact that what we’ve got here is failure to communicate. can handle it. There will be sterner tests the Rangers are sixth in goals-against is a So Good To See You against bigger, stronger teams, however. testament to the goaltending they get from There are those out there who will tell you Obviously, the game turned on Lundqvist and #2 Stephen Valiquette. the Original 6 doesn’t mean anything these what was a dominant six-minute kill. It’s so With their d-men bordering on days. But it’s hard to ignore the charge in the heartening to see a team pick up a team- blisters-on-your-dick bad, the Rangers would air whenever the Bruins, Habs, or Rangers pay mate who went to bat for another teammate. clearly have to count on their forwards to be a visit. We expect a rollicking atmosphere to- Upon further review, Stafford’s hit was less significantly better. Well, they haven’t been, night, with a little NY- rivalry to spice than clean. It was a direct blow to the head and now you see why they’re barely over things up. The Rangers come in having won against a defenseless opponent, and whether .500 since the beginning of November. The their last two, but against white flag-waving it was legal or not, it definitely had the scent Rangers have been let down by what should and Long Island. This is not the force of chicken-shit. So did Stafford’s absolute be a glittering forward lineup, or at least is we saw in October, and the Hawks aren’t the refusal to answer the bell when Eager came paid like one. is on the third same either. But, more than likely, it will be calling. The Sabres have never handled physi- line, after playing wing most of the . one of the league’s premier shot-stoppers cal play well, and now you see why. is on pace for 50 points, for $8 facing us, so it will not be easy. Still, with The power play looked a lot better million. After a hot start, Markus Naslund New York’s struggles with their d-men and against a very good kill side, though it reverted to the glorified floater he was in Van- the way the Hawks forecheck at home, they’ll didn’t score. Put another mark on the Why- couver. If it wasn’t for the no-longer-incar- have their opportunities. Take just a few, and We-Love-Coach-Q Board, as we doubt Savvy cerated-by-Hitchcock Nikolai Zherdev and the the points are ours. -Grand Master Flash would have ever fixed a power play with only underrated , the Rangers two days to work with. They’ll have to be on their toes again tonight, as the league’s best PK is in town. There were also flashes -- but only flashes -- of a healthy Patrick Kane. Here’s hoping we’ll see a few more this evening. If not, Havlat will have to come save the day, but he hasn’t had a problem doing that recently. Also, a Committed Indian-kiss to , who not only went to defend Keith, but also has been productive on a line with Sharp and Kane. He’s skating hard, taking the body, and causing a turnover here and there. That should be a lesson to a pressbox-contained Troy Brouwer. If You Can Score Here, You’d Be The Only One To tonight’s soiree, and the inva- sion of the Broadway Blueshirts, the . Any discussion of the Rangers must start with in . A con- vincing argument can be made that since the lockout, there hasn’t been a better netminder than King Henrik. Save percentages of .922, .917, .912, and .913 this year, along with GAA ‘s never above 2.34 are striking enough. In addition, this is hardly a or Co- “I’m gonna make Buff play angry, no matter what it takes!”

MUSINGS FROM THE EDITOR

Okay, I give up. I’ve tried to be patient. I really have. It doesn’t like crackheads at 4am in the park. Duncan Keith rarely, if ever, become me. I’ve tried to act my age for once, and let something lays anyone out and yet he’s playing some of the best defense in the roll off my back. But I can’t take it any more. I’m going to have to league. It’s not always necessary. There are times and places for a chastise some new Hawk fans in the United Center. I didn’t want to big hit, and I wish I saw it more often, but it is not all the time. do this, but I’m sorry, it’s gotten too much. For the love of Jocelyn Lemiuex, stop yelling, “SHOOT!” I -A few people have asked me to address this, and I can’t stand it any more. apologize for waiting so long to do so. Where have I understand that as a novice fan, or a our drummers gone? You remember them. When dumb one, you can’t recognize that there’s no lane the UC first opened, they used to pop up once or to the net. I also get the fact that you won’t grasp twice-a-game during whistles. If you don’t remem- the concept of someone being in front of the net, ber or are new to the scene, they were four guys who as you don’t know that an NHL goalie will most used to do a drum circle during timeouts. They used likely stop anything he can see from a long distance. to get the joint really jumping. It harkened back to But I’m here to teach you. Start looking for these the yahoos in the Standing Room of the Old Stadium pounding on the fire-escape doors (I was one at the things. Cam Barker cannot let one go if there’s a Sam Fels checker four feet in front of him. There’s no point age of 9, and now you know how I got this way). in 51 Phantom letting fly if there’s no one providing Maybe McDonough doesn’t want to cough up the a screen in front. Please, for my sanity, and the sanity of all other free tickets to the four of them when those tickets could be sold to Hawks fans who feel this way, look for these things. It’s not hard. some boring-ass family of four from Wheeling. Maybe those guys You’ll get it after a few tries. I promise. aren’t interested in doing it any more, but I highly doubt that’s the Secondly, and less offensive, are the ones yelling, “Hit case. We’d like our drummers back, as it would be one less timeout somebody!” I, and drinking buddy Matt McClure especially, are when I have to see some fat doofus waving on the scoreboard, or sometimes annoyed at the Hawks soft-play in their own end, too. have to listen to Nickelback or Linkin Park on the PA. I know they However, just because the play is in our end does not automati- can be found, do so. cally mean that every Hawk on the ice should be racing around NHL STANDINGS *late game not included

Eastern Conference Western Conference

W L OTL PTS GF GA HOME AWAY W L OTL PTS GF GA HOME AWAY 1 Boston 33 7 4 70 159 96 17-3-1 16-4-3 1 San Jose 32 6 5 69 152 102 20-1-2 12-5-3 2 Washington 28 14 3 59 147 133 18-3-1 10-11-2 2 Twats 31 7 6 68 165 121 16-3-2 15-4-4 3 NY Rangers 26 15 4 56 120 118 14-8-2 12-7-2 3 Calgary 27 12 4 58 136 124 16-4-3 11-8-1 4 26 11 6 58 136 114 15-4-4 11-7-2 4 HAWKS 24 10 7 55 147 104 14-2-4 10-8-3 5 Philadelphia 23 12 9 55 143 132 14-5-3 9-7-6 5 Vancouver 22 19 5 49 131 129 11-10-2 11-9-3 6 25 15 3 53 132 113 13-8-1 12-7-2 6 Anaheim 22 18 5 49 129 128 13-10-3 9-8-2 7 Buffalo 22 17 5 49 126 125 12-9-2 10-8-3 7 Phoenix 22 18 5 49 113 127 15-6-2 7-12-3 8 Carolina 21 19 5 47 116 138 12-10-1 9-9-4 8 Minnesota 22 18 3 47 111 98 13-7-3 9-11-0 9 Florida 20 16 6 46 120 119 10-5-3 10-11-3 9 Columbus 21 18 4 46 115 117 13-6-1 8-12-3 10 Pittsburgh 21 20 4 46 137 143 9-10-2 12-10-2 10 21 19 3 45 119 130 9-8-3 12-11-0 11 17 21 6 40 130 158 8-9-4 9-12-2 11 Colorado 22 21 1 45 118 129 13-8-0 9-13-1 12 Tampa Bay 14 20 10 38 109 136 5-7-7 9-13-3 12 Nashville 20 21 3 43 108 124 12-7-1 8-14-2 13 Ottawa 15 21 6 36 101 122 10-7-3 5-14-3 13 Dallas 18 17 7 43 121 145 10-6-4 8-11-3 14 Atlanta 14 25 5 33 126 160 7-13-2 7-12-3 14 L.A. 17 20 6 40 104 121 12-11-6 5-9-0 15 NY Islanders 12 28 4 28 111 158 7-11-2 5-17-2 15 St. Louis 17 23 3 37 125 143 11-9-2 6-14-1

TOP 10 LIST PUCK DROP Rangers Fans: You Top 10 Things We’re Tired of Hearing From New York always hear about great 10. Complaints about their winter. If it snows an inch in Manhattan there’s places to see a game, and a Special Report on all four networks. You know nothing about winter. yet somehow MSG never 9. Derek Jeter is a great shortstop. Not no more he ain’t! is at the top of the list. It 8. The Strokes and The Walkmen are great bands. No, they’re not. should be. It’s racuous, They’re decidedly mediocre, always have been. filled with knowledgable 7. The Beastie Boys. fans, and is the last old- 6. The Knicks are the NBA’s premier franchise. The Celtics have 17 titles, time building. It will be the Lakers 14. The Knicks? 2. gutted soon, so try and get there in the next few years. That said, Rangers 5. Their pizza. It’s just like everyone else’s. At least ours is unique. fans are a strange phenomenon. Walk around 4. How it’s the center of the world. You keep your trash on the streets. Manhattan some time, and tell us if you see Have you smelled the place in the summer? The world can do better for a one Rangers jersey. Anywhere. Rangers fans center. are like the people you see at heavy metal 3. This is the Mets Year! Yeah, sure it is. It’s the Cubs one, too. shows. You never see them anywhere else. 2. J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets! F-U-C-K You You You! We think all Rangers fans are kept in a pen 1. How expensive rent is in New York. We know. You know what helps? beneath Penn Station, and are let out about 4 NOT FUCKING LIVING THERE. hours before gametime. It’s the best theory we have. 24-10-7

For those not keeping track (we have to because our friend Margaret says we do, as Havlat is “poetic beautiful.” Her words, not ours), since Havlat was paired with Bolland and Ladd he has 7 goals and 11 assists and is +13 in 19 games. Over a full season, that would be 30 goals, 77 points, and an insane +56.

# Pos Player Ht WT AGE GP G A P +/- PIM PP SH GW S S% Salary (Cap Hit) 88 R Patrick Kane 5'10" 187 20 39 16 26 42 2 26 8 0 2 116 13.8 $3,725,000

32 L VerStud 5'10" 180 22 40 13 22 35 16 43 4 2 2 73 17.8 $491,667 How many teams have this as their 7th d-man? 24 R The Perfect Beard 6'2" 217 27 41 13 22 35 18 16 4 0 1 118 11 $6,000,000 10 L The Sharp-Shooter 6'1" 197 27 41 21 14 35 0 32 7 0 4 124 16.9 $3,900,000 19 C Marvel 6'2" 209 20 41 12 22 34 7 29 3 0 3 95 12.6 $2,800,000 51 D 51 Phantom 6'0" 188 29 41 7 22 29 8 6 4 0 1 57 12.3 $7,142,875 16 L Nails 6'2" 198 23 41 8 19 27 19 16 0 0 0 98 8.2 $1,550,000 2 D Duncan Keith 6'1" 194 25 41 5 21 26 23 20 1 1 1 86 5.8 $1,475,000 36 C Dave Bolland 6'0" 188 22 41 8 16 24 15 18 0 1 2 56 14.3 $845,833 33 R 6'3" 247 23 38 9 9 18 4 51 3 0 2 101 8.9 $3,000,000 25 D Cam Barker 6'3" 213 22 28 3 14 17 -4 17 3 0 1 33 9.1 $2,768,587 22 R Troy Brouwer 6'2" 213 23 33 5 10 15 6 34 2 0 0 56 8.9 $675,000 7 D Brent Seabrook 6'3" 220 23 41 4 8 12 15 43 1 1 0 68 5.9 $3,500,000 55 L Ben Eager 6'2" 220 24 37 8 3 11 3 84 0 0 0 37 21.6 $568,000 46 C Colin Fraser 6'1" 188 23 41 3 8 11 2 42 0 0 0 32 9.4 $500,000 43 D James Wisniewski 6'0" 207 24 12 1 6 7 2 4 0 0 0 33 3 $900,000 23 D Aaron Johnson 6'1" 211 25 23 3 4 7 17 14 0 0 1 17 17.6 $600,000 28 R Craig Adams 6'0" 197 31 26 2 4 6 -1 16 1 0 0 30 6.7 $600,000 37 R Adam Burish 6'1" 189 26 25 2 2 4 1 49 0 0 1 33 6.1 $712,500 8 D Matt Walker 6'3" 214 28 29 0 3 3 6 37 0 0 0 35 0 $600,000 5 D * 6'1" 211 32 23 1 1 2 -4 8 0 0 1 15 6.7 $2,333,333 Totals/Averages 6'1" 203.75 24.17 145 256 614 41 5 1327 10.93% $44,187,795

*injured Cam has been better since he took a seat in the pressbox, but you wonder if he isn’t being showcased. With Havlat and Khabby becoming indispensable, Barker and Buff would appear to be the only valuable (some- what), moveable pieces. # Goalie HT WT AGE GPI Min GAA W L OT SO SA GA Sv% G A PIM Salary 39 6'1" 209 36 22 1274 2.31 13 3 4 1 666 49 0.926 0 2 4 $6,750,000 38 Cristobal Huet 6'1" 205 33 21 1212 2.38 11 7 3 2 572 48 0.916 0 0 0 $5,625,000 Totals/Averages 6'1" 207 34 2486 2.35 24 10 7 3 1238 97 0.921 0 2 4 $12,375,000 TOTAL CAP NUMBER: $57,283,000 CAP SPACE: $274,000* Probable Pairings Probable Lines *space also affected by buyouts and injured players Left Wing Center Right Wing 2 Keith 7 Seabrook 55 Eager 10 Sharp 88 Kane 51 Campbell 8 Walker Injury List 43 Wisniewski 25 Barker 32 Versteeg 19 Toews 33 Byfuglien Duncan Keith- Questionable (Head) 16 Ladd 36 Bolland 24 Havlat Brent Sopel- Out (Talent) 37 Burish 46 Fraser 28 Adams

16 years ago, David Stern sent me to ruin the NHL. I have done every- thing I can think of to drive the core I am so close to completing the task fan away, strip hockey of all that’s Stern charged me with.... great about it, and eliminate any at- tention by the mainstream media... “Potvin Sucks” 26-15-4

Naslund has 3 points in his last 12 games. That faint laughing you hear is from Vancouver.

# Pos Player Ht WT AGE GP G A P +/- PIM PP SH GW S S% Salary (Cap Hit) 13 R Nikolai Zherdev 6' 2" 203 24 45 12 25 37 6 23 3 1 0 117 10.3 $2,500,000

23 C Chris Drury 5' 10" 190 32 45 13 16 29 -4 16 4 1 1 125 10.4 $7,050,000 Feeling any better about that 51 Phantom contract? 19 C Scott Gomez 5' 11" 200 29 40 8 21 29 -9 38 0 1 3 142 5.6 $7,357,000 91 L Markus Naslund 6' 0" 191 35 45 14 14 28 -11 24 5 0 0 111 12.6 $4,000,000 17 C Brandon Dubinsky 6' 1" 205 22 45 6 17 23 -2 49 2 0 5 111 5.4 $633,000 3 D Michal Rozsival 6' 2" 205 30 44 7 14 21 -9 30 3 0 2 65 10.8 $5,000,000 24 L 5' 11" 188 23 45 12 5 17 -2 24 2 1 0 132 9.1 $575,000 10 L 5' 9" 193 23 35 8 8 16 5 15 3 0 4 59 13.6 $588,000 6 D 6' 2" 212 31 44 2 14 16 -7 27 1 0 0 85 2.4 $6,500,000 5 D Dan Girardi 6' 2" 210 24 45 3 13 16 -4 15 1 0 1 75 4 $1,550,000 27 D Paul Mara 6' 4" 212 29 45 4 11 15 0 59 1 0 0 67 6 $1,950,000 34 L Aaron Voros 6' 3" 215 27 40 8 6 14 -5 83 3 0 1 58 13.8 $1,000,000 45 D 6' 3" 210 28 45 1 8 9 -9 24 0 0 0 45 2.2 $2,100,000 18 D Marc Staal 6' 4" 209 22 45 1 6 7 7 30 0 0 0 50 2 $827,000 25 R Petr Prucha 6' 0" 175 26 18 3 3 6 0 9 0 0 0 26 11.5 $1,800,000 15 C 6' 3" 210 28 44 4 2 6 2 6 0 1 0 49 8.2 $615,000 29 L Lauri Korpikoski 6' 1" 195 22 33 2 3 5 -2 6 0 0 1 29 6.9 $957,000 20 R Fredrik Sjostrom 6' 1" 218 25 43 2 3 5 -7 14 0 0 0 59 3.4 $840,000 49 C Dan Fritsche 6' 1" 204 23 15 1 3 4 -2 2 0 0 0 19 5.3 $875,000 28 R 6' 3" 222 26 45 1 3 4 -4 93 0 0 0 25 4 $537,000

According to Behind The Net, Mara is the best on the PK in the the PK in on Net, Mara is the best The According to Behind league. Totals/Averages 6' 1" 203.35 26.45 112 196 -59 587 28 5 1452 7.71% $47,254,000 Not only is Prucha playing, and scoring, again, but he’s drawing 1.5 more penalites than he’s tak- ing per 60 minutes on ice.

# Goalie HT WT AGE GPI Min GAA W L OT SO SA GA Sv% G A PIM Salary 30 Henrik Lundqvist 6' 1" 195 26 37 2191 2.55 22 12 3 2 1068 93 0.913 0 1 0 $6,875,000 40 Stephen Valiquette 6' 6" 210 31 10 548 2.19 4 3 1 1 276 20 0.928 0 0 2 $725,000 6' 3" 202.5 28.5 2739 2.37 26 15 4 3 1344 113 0.915 1 2 $7,600,000 ** injured If the Hawks don’t have the best goaltending duo in the league, the TOTAL CAP NUMBER: $55,107,000 Rangers probably do, and they’re not paying $12 mil for it. CAP SPACE: $1,683,000* Probable Lines Probable Pairings *space also affected by buyouts and injured players Left Wing Center Right Wing 6 Redden 5 Girardi Injury List 91 Naslund 19 Gomez 24 Callahan 18 Staal 3 Rozsival 29 Korpikoski 17 Dubinsky 13 Zherdev 27 Mara 45 Kalinin 10 Dawes 23 Drury 25 Prucha 28 Orr 15 Betts 20 SJostrom

...IS THIS THE YEAR? If we had our way when the Geico Caveman tells us to make some noise...

We’re hard men, but fair. The Fight Card

HAWKS vs. RANGERS Fight Stats provided by Hockeyfights.com

GAME FIGHT TIME Bloody Black Bruised Just Analysis Nose Eye Ego Dancing 1-10-08 Skille v. 2nd. Skille and Mara basically hug-out what- Mara 16:16 ever dispute they were having. Mara √ wins on the takedown (takedown is the nickname my college roommate got for courting his wife, who was a lesbian at the time). 1-10-08 Fraser v. Callahan objects to semi-late Fraser hit. Callahan √ Both land nice shots early. Draw. 2-18-07 LaPointe v. LaPointe knocks Hollweg down twice Hollweg in a marathon battle. No major shots, √ √ but enough punches land to make it worthwhile. What To Watch For: The Rangers have a couple unpleasant fellows in Colton Orr and Aaron Voros, though Voros is likely to fins himself sitting tonight.. They have the 8th most fights in the league (strangely, the Hawks are 7th). That being said, Rang- ers fans are livid at how soft the Blueshirts have been this season. The Hawks haven’t had a scrap in a while, but an Original 6 match-up and a packed, ravenous UC, there should be one tonight. Now that Wiz has his first goal, we’re once again calling for his first fight. Power Play Penalty Kill Team Opp PPG PP% Team OPP PPG PP% Team TS PPGA PK% Team TS PPGA PK% DET 183 50 27.3 NJD 156 28 18.0 MIN 151 18 88.1 NJD 168 31 81.6 PHI 165 44 26.7 EDM 197 35 17.8 NYR 173 21 87.9 ANA 232 44 81.0 BOS 168 40 23.8 NYI 184 32 17.4 BUF 174 22 87.4 CBJ 194 37 80.9 SJS 200 47 23.5 VAN 200 34 17.0 CGY 185 26 86.0 PHX 172 33 80.8 WSH 189 43 22.8 PIT 202 34 16.8 SJS 161 23 85.7 TBL 223 43 80.7 CHI 184 41 22.3 COL 183 30 16.4 CHI 175 27 84.6 STL 194 38 80.4 STL 190 42 22.1 CAR 206 33 16.0 NSH 207 33 84.1 DET 183 36 80.3 ATL 182 39 21.4 MTL 204 32 15.7 BOS 163 27 83.4 WSH 213 43 79.8 ANA 178 38 21.4 TBL 188 29 15.4 PHI 222 37 83.3 PIT 194 40 79.4 MIN 187 39 20.9 FLA 166 25 15.1 FLA 178 30 83.2 COL 172 38 77.9 TOR 193 39 20.2 DAL 181 26 14.4 LAK 186 32 82.8 CAR 169 38 77.5 BUF 188 37 19.7 NYR 196 28 14.3 NYI 199 35 82.4 DAL 168 38 77.4 CGY 195 38 19.5 NSH 179 24 13.4 MTL 197 35 82.2 EDM 192 47 75.5 LAK 188 34 18.1 PHX 190 24 12.6 OTT 176 32 81.8 ATL 189 50 73.5 OTT 177 32 18.1 CBJ 190 21 11.0 VAN 213 39 81.7 TOR 166 45 72.9 Spotlight

Nikolai Zherdev

Every time we watch Zherdev with the Blueshirts, we keep hearing The Who’s “I’m Free” in our ears. To say Nikolai chafed under Ken Hitchcock’s system would be like saying your member chafed after 12 consecutive hours of self-flagella- tion. There has never been a question of Zherdev’s talent, and as Hawks fans we’ve certainly seen it as he’s lit us up more than enough times. But in Hitch’s world, skill is the enemy, conformity king. They couldn’t wait to punt him out of town. How do you think Columbus feels about that now, with their power play dead last in the league, and by some margin? We’re sure Christian Backman’s one goal on the season doesn’t make them feel any better. Neither would Fedor Tyutin’s ho-hum displays. Zherdev started the season on fire, with 12 points in his first 13 games on Broadway, and actually made Markus Naslund useful. Unfortunately, no one else on the Rangers, even the ones being paid millions, could keep up. Zherdev started seeing opponents’ best checkers, and Naslund turned back into the weenie we remember in Vancouver. No one would benefit from Drury and Gomez earning their paychecks more than Zherdev, and we’d love it. Anything that makes Hitchcock look stupid, we’re all for.

The Committed Indian is printed by Royal Omega Graphics- Elk Grove, IL 847-952-8000 [email protected] KNOW THY ENEMY

This evening, Kevin of the New York Rangers Blog (nyrangersblog.com) and Dubi will Rozival live through the year? from Blueshirt Bulletin (blueshirtibulletin.com) answer our inquisitions about the Kevin: It’s tough to get on a defensive unit that’s fifth in the league in GAA. But Broadway Blueshirts. yes, they do have problems, with the number one issue being lack of toughness. Q: The Rangers might set a record for loudest complaints from a fan base They don’t have a big bruising defenseman that would intimidate another team. for a team in first place. Is this just a New York thing where nothing is ever A lot fans wanted the Rangers to get Brooks Orpik in the off-season, but instead good enough? Or is there genuine concern about the blueshirts? GM decided to over pay for both Michal Rozsival and Wade Redden. Kevin: Right now the Ranger fan base is in a quandry because in the late 90’s While Rozsival was in the fans doghouse big time earlier this year his play over when the were winning with defensive hockey we Ranger fans the last month has improved dramatically and -- I can’t believe I’m saying this-- complained that they were ruining the game. he might actually be playing up to his contract. Redden has been a complete bust. Now our beloved Rangers are playing that same type of hockey and He’s given us nothing. It almost seems like he doesn’t want to be on the ice. No we’re not sure what to think. The worst part about it is we’re not playing that passion. It’s not all doom and gloom defensively though as we have two of the defensive system half as good as the Devils (the Rangers only have three players brightest up-incoming defensmen in Marc Staal and Dan Girardi. with a + rating). Without Henrik Lundqvist’s brilliant play in the beginning of the sea- What is up with Petr Prucha? We remember a 30-goal scorer in his rookie son we’re a .500 team at best. So I don’t think it’s a “nothing’s ever good enough year who then disappeared to never-never land for the next two seasons, and for New York” because if this team was flying up and down the ice every night now has popped up with 3 goals in his last five. What’s the deal? the city would love this team. Kevin: The Petr Prucha situation is one that no Ranger fan will ever accurately be able to describe. Some fans think Prucha’s first year was just an aberration and Chris Drury is barely on pace for 20 goals this season. Is that enough for $7 he hasn’t deserved the ice time, while others feel that coach pulled mil? the plug on Prucha too early when he started to struggle and he lost all his confi- Dubi: Drury was never about numbers. He was supposed to be “Captain Clutch” dence. This year a couple of players we brought in during the off-season haven’t -- his intangibles on and off the ice were his calling card, what earned him his panned out (Aaron Voros, Patrick Rissmiller and Dan Fritsche) opening the door salary. Beyond his scoring woes, his defense has disappeared on him, as has his for a Prucha re-emergence. Despite his previous struggles the kid always worked trademark face-off superiority. But worst of all has been his captaincy. Drury hard and gave maximum effort which kept him as a fan favorite. There’s not a angered Ranger fans after the Rangers blew a 4-0 lead to the Caps and lost in OT Ranger fan out there that isn’t ecstatic with Prucha’s turn around. just before Christmas when he said that he had already forgotten about the loss, would not let it ruin his holiday, and hey, you never know if that’s the point that Really hit the jackpot with Zherdev there, didn’t you? gets you home-ice advantage or something. The first angry fan was me -- I was Kevin: The Nikolai Zherdev had to be one of the biggest steals in NHL there when he said that and lost my composure when I said to him, “You have history. Well, maybe that’s a little much. But this guy is a player. He reminds a 4-0 lead with Henrik Lundqvist in net and you’re happy to come away with a Ranger fans of a young Alexei Kovalov. His talent is still very raw, but once he point?” figures it out he’s going to be All-World. Without him we’d probably be only scoring one goal a night. Markus Nasland was drummed out of Vancouver, and after a hot start in NY With all the talent you have, why do you struggle to score so? seems to be rounding into that form again at -11. What’s the feeling on him Dubi: Some will talk about lack of size up front and lack of a big shot from the in Ranger-land? point. T here is currently no one up front who meets the criteria of a true first Dubi: Oddly enough, few people have taken notice that he has just one point (an line player (though Zherdev might be that guy some day, maybe even soon, and assist) in his last six games, just two goals and an assist in his last twelve, and has Naslund once was that kind of guy, though he is no longer) and no one on the taken over the team lead in worst +/- from the widely reviled Dmitri Kalinin (who blue line who is a true first pair defenseman (though Staal might be that guy has just as quietly gone from -17 to -9 in the past month). Somewhere between some day, maybe soon, and Redden once was that kind of guy, though he is no low expectations based on his last couple of seasons in Vancouver and the atten- longer). But to me, the problem over the past two seasons has been one thing and tion focused on the poor season his playmaking center Scott Gomez is having has one thing alone -- the power play. One extra goal per game on the power play allowed Naslund to slip under the radar. There is some validity to the latter half is the difference between a poor PP ranking and an average one, and that would of that assessment -- Gomez has told us several times that Naslund is always open translate to an average offense and an outstanding won-loss record. Here too, the and that it’s his fault for not being able to get the puck to him. problem falls somewhere between an ill-conceived game plan that funnels too Your blue line is catching a lot of heat. Is it as bad as were are led to many pucks to the point and the wrong collection of personnel (especially the believe? Is this somewhere you might look to upgrade at the deadline? And lack of a quarterback, which Redden was supposed to be).

Hawks-Rangers: the Last 4

Oct. 10th, 2008: Hawks 2, Rangers 4 Feb. 18th, 2007: Hawks 1, Rangers 2 Opening night, Rangers get benefit of opening Absolute snoozer. The Other Hossa and Martin season against Melrose-led ‘Ning and Savvy-led Straka score in the 1st, and that’s all King Henrik Hawks. Dubinsky bends us over a chair with the needs. The Perfect Beard is the only one to dent for aid of Zherdev. Even Redden and Voros score. the Hawks, as he so often was then.

Dec. 7th, 2005: Rangers 1, Hawks 2 Nov. 16th, 2003: Rangers 2, Hawks 2 (OT) Ah, ties. Remember those? Don’t you miss them? Another sedative. Prucha and Spacek trade goals Just a little? This is really all we know about this 18 seconds apart in the 2nd, and then Arnason one. Probably a bore too. leaves the buffet long enough to hit OT winner. Hockey Sabermetrics CHICAGO Every game, we provide you with the Behind The Net numbers. These are at even strength, 5-on-5. Key: QUALCOMP- A measure of the quality of competition each player faces on the ice. Calculated by averaging +/-/60 for opponents on the ice against player. QUALTEAM- A measure of the quality of teammates each player plays with. Calcu- lated by averaging +/-/60 for teammates on ice with player. TOI/60- Time on ice, per 60 minutes, that player spends on ice at full-strength. GFON/60, GAON/60- Goals for and against team per 60 min. player is on ice +/-ON/60- Team’s Plus/minus, per 60 minutes, while player is on ice. +/-OFF/60- Plus/minus of team while player is off ice, per 60 minutes. RATING- +/-ON/60 subtracted by +/-OFF/60. NAME QUALCOMP QUALTEAM TOI/60 GFON/60 GAON/60 +-ON/60 GFOFF/60 GAOFF/60 +-OFF/60 RATING Aaron Johnson -0.04 -0.16 11.65 4.48 1.34 3.14 2.66 2.01 0.64 2.49 0.07 0.26 12.44 3.88 1.88 2 2.73 2.24 0.49 1.51 Martin Havlat 0 0.12 13.26 3.64 1.99 1.66 2.8 2.2 0.6 1.06 Duncan Keith 0.06 0.19 18.39 3.5 1.99 1.51 2.73 2.24 0.49 1.02 Dave Bolland 0.07 0.4 12.08 3.76 2.18 1.58 2.79 2.12 0.66 0.91 0.06 -0.19 12.52 3.35 2.04 1.32 2.97 2.24 0.73 0.59 Troy Brouwer 0.02 -0.21 11.38 2.72 1.44 1.28 3.16 2.19 0.96 0.32 Brent Seabrook 0.07 0.39 16.76 3.06 2.01 1.05 3.04 2.21 0.82 0.22 Matt Walker -0.05 -0.16 12.97 3.03 1.91 1.12 2.98 1.96 1.01 0.1 Patrick Kane 0.07 -0.15 13.86 3.22 2.78 0.44 2.73 1.95 0.78 -0.34 Dustin Byfuglien 0 0.15 11.97 2.24 1.58 0.66 3.33 2.31 1.01 -0.35 James Wisniewski 0.03 -0.03 15.11 2.65 1.65 0.99 3.37 2.02 1.35 -0.35 Ben Eager -0.13 -0.25 8.1 2.4 1.6 0.8 3.32 2.14 1.18 -0.38 Brian Campbell -0.01 -0.19 17.7 3.06 2.4 0.66 3.04 1.97 1.07 -0.4 Colin Fraser -0.14 -0.28 7.78 2.63 2.07 0.56 3.13 2.15 0.98 -0.41 0.05 0 13.07 3.13 2.57 0.56 3.01 1.96 1.05 -0.49 Adam Burish -0.07 -0.14 6.85 2.8 2.1 0.7 3.36 2.13 1.23 -0.52 Craig Adams -0.19 -0.25 7.66 1.81 1.81 0 3.36 2.28 1.08 -1.08 Patrick Sharp 0 0.02 13.41 2.84 2.73 0.11 3.13 1.89 1.24 -1.13 Brent Sopel -0.1 -0.02 10.89 2.16 3.11 -0.96 3.22 2.25 0.97 -1.93 Cam Barker -0.02 -0.11 14.12 2.12 2.73 -0.61 3.53 1.77 1.77 -2.37

Corsi Rating Penalties Drawn Face-offs Shots attempted for a team vs. how many are Player Face-Offs Taken FO% attempted against while a given player is on vs. Taken the ice, per 60 min. Pretty self-explanatory. A measure of penalties Jonathan Toews 644 52.6 drawn vs. taken, per 60 min. NAME CORSI Colin Fraser 426 48.4 NAME PDRAW/60 PTAKE/60 James Wisniewski 27.1 Patrick Sharp 474 45.4 Adam Burish 2.1 0.7 Martin Havlat 14.7 Kris Versteeg 71 45.1 Colin Fraser 1.7 0.8 Andrew Ladd 11.9 Dave Bolland 578 45.0 Patrick Kane 1.6 1.1 Dustin Byfuglien 11.6 Total Rank: 28th 47.3 Dave Bolland 1.5 0.6 Dave Bolland 10.8 Craig Adams 1.5 0.9 Power Play Ratings Penalty Kill Ratings Duncan Keith 10.5 This is a measure of a team’s This measures how many goals a Troy Brouwer 1.4 1 Brent Seabrook 9.9 goals-for per 60 minutes of player team gives up per 60 minutes the Kris Versteeg 1.3 1 being on the ice on the power play. player is on the ice on the PK. Brian Campbell 9.5 Patrick Sharp 1.3 1.1 Player GFON/60 Jonathan Toews 9 Player GA/60 Andrew Ladd 1.2 0.8 Kris Versteeg 8.5 Cam Barker 11.89 Andrew Ladd 2.57 Ben Eager 1.2 2.8 Adam Burish 8.4 Patrick Sharp 8.65 Matt Walker 4.32 James Wisniewski 1 0.7 Aaron Johnson 8.3 Jonathan Toews 8.17 Dave Bolland 4.6 Jonathan Toews 1 0.8 Cam Barker 8.2 Brian Campbell 8.15 Brent Seabrook 5.11 Dustin Byfuglien 0.9 1.3 Patrick Kane 8.1 Dustin Byfuglien 7.95 J. Wisniewski 5.49 Martin Havlat 0.8 0.7 Ben Eager 7.6 Patrick Kane 7.94 Adam Burish 5.52 Brian Campbell 0.7 0.2 Troy Brouwer 7 Brent Seabrook 7.54 Duncan Keith 5.99 Matt Walker 0.5 0.5 Patrick Sharp 6.2 James Wisniewski 7.04 Aaron Johnson 6.07 Brent Sopel 0.5 1 Matt Walker 4 Martin Havlat 7 Brent Sopel 6.43 Aaron Johnson 0.4 1.3 Craig Adams 3.6 Duncan Keith 6.81 Kris Versteeg 7.72 Brent Seabrook 0.3 1.1 Kris Versteeg 6.68 Colin Fraser 7.76 Hockey Sabermetrics NEW YORK RANGERS Every game, we provide you with the Behind The Net numbers. These are at even strength, 5-on-5. Key: QUALCOMP- A measure of the quality of competition each player faces on the ice. Calculated by averaging +/-/60 for opponents on the ice against player. QUALTEAM- A measure of the quality of teammates each player plays with. Calcu- lated by averaging +/-/60 for teammates on ice with player. TOI/60- Time on ice, per 60 minutes, that player spends on ice at full-strength. GFON/60, GAON/60- Goals for and against team per 60 min. player is on ice +/-ON/60- Team’s Plus/minus, per 60 minutes, while player is on ice. +/-OFF/60- Plus/minus of team while player is off ice, per 60 minutes. RATING- +/-ON/60 subtracted by +/-OFF/60. NAME QUALCOMP QUALTEAM TOI/60 GFON/60 GAON/60 +-ON/60 GFOFF/60 GAOFF/60 +-OFF/60 RATING Nikolai Zherdev 0.01 0.01 13.24 3.67 2.37 1.29 1.64 2.08 -0.44 1.74 Nigel Dawes 0.04 0.11 11.99 2.8 1.62 1.18 2.04 2.36 -0.31 1.49 Petr Prucha -0.01 0.19 11.52 2.14 1.23 0.92 1.74 1.53 0.2 0.71 Paul Mara 0 -0.02 14.29 2.2 1.7 0.5 2.24 2.38 -0.14 0.64 B. Dubinsky -0.01 0.2 12.18 2.7 2.23 0.47 2.06 2.14 -0.09 0.55 Ryan Callahan 0.07 0.02 13.1 1.74 1.31 0.44 2.42 2.51 -0.09 0.52 Wade Redden 0.03 0.08 15.37 2.38 1.9 0.48 2.24 2.28 -0.05 0.52 Dan Girardi 0.01 0.09 15.48 2.31 1.94 0.37 2.19 2.28 -0.1 0.46 Marc Staal 0.09 -0.02 16.12 2.22 2.04 0.18 2.23 2.23 0 0.18 Aaron Voros 0.05 0.22 9.84 2.64 2.64 0 2.07 2.16 -0.09 0.09 Chris Drury 0.03 0.1 13.3 2.47 2.36 0.11 2.13 2.08 0.04 0.06 Scott Gomez 0.1 0.13 15.07 2.26 2.26 0 2.23 1.96 0.27 -0.27 Blair Betts 0.02 -0.56 7.98 1.79 1.97 -0.18 2.32 2.21 0.11 -0.29 Lauri Korpikoski -0.07 0.01 10.28 2.14 2.33 -0.19 2.53 2.3 0.22 -0.42 Markus Naslund 0.06 0.11 13.78 1.97 2.28 -0.31 2.34 2.11 0.22 -0.54 Dan Fritsche 0.09 0.08 9.16 2.01 3.02 -1.01 2.22 2.62 -0.39 -0.62 Dmitri Kalinin -0.02 0.06 14.63 2.15 2.73 -0.59 2.26 1.89 0.37 -0.96 Michal Rozsival 0.06 0.05 15.53 2.07 2.73 -0.66 2.34 1.85 0.49 -1.15 Colton Orr -0.01 -0.42 7.12 1 2.01 -1 2.45 2.19 0.26 -1.26 Fredrik Sjostrom 0 -0.18 9.48 1.42 2.85 -1.42 2.48 2.03 0.46 -1.88

Corsi Rating Penalties Drawn Face-offs This measures how many shots are attempted Player Face-Offs Taken FO% for a team vs. how many are attempted against vs. Taken Scott Gomez 682 51.3 while a given player is on the ice, per 60 min. Pretty self-explanatory. A measure of penalties drawn vs. taken, per 60 min. Brandon Dubinsky 541 50.8 NAME CORSI NAME PDRAW/60 PTAKE/60 Chris Drury 599 49.9 Aaron Voros 16.7 Aaron Voros 2.1 1.6 Blair Betts 484 46.7 Brandon Dubinsky 16.3 Petr Prucha 1.8 0.3 Lauri Korpikoski 107 42 Nikolai Zherdev 15 Ryan Callahan 1.7 0.5 Total: Rank: 21st 49.2 Scott Gomez 13.8 Lauri Korpikoski 1.6 0.6 Markus Naslund 11.5 Scott Gomez 1.4 0.9 Marc Staal 9.6 Brandon Dubinsky 1.2 1.4 Ryan Callahan 9.2 Power Play Ratings Penalty Kill Ratings Dan Fritsche 1 0 This is a measure of a team’s goals This measures how many goals Michal Rozsival 9 Colton Orr 1 1.8 for per 60 minutes of player being a team gives up per 60 minutes Wade Redden 7.9 on the ice on the power play. the player is on the ice on the Blair Betts 0.9 0.2 Dan Girardi 7.3 Player GFON/60 Player GAON/60 Fredrik Sjostrom 0.9 0.9 Nigel Dawes 4.9 Paul Mara 5.42 Paul Mara 0.67 Nikolai Zherdev 0.8 0.5 Fredrik Sjostrom 3.5 Michal Rozsival 4.3 Wade Redden 3.3 Markus Naslund 0.8 0.9 Paul Mara 3.4 Dan Girardi 4.27 Marc Staal 3.34 Dmitri Kalinin 0.8 0.9 Petr Prucha 2.8 Nikolai Zherdev 4.21 Dan Girardi 3.81 Nigel Dawes 0.7 0.3 Chris Drury 1.3 Markus Naslund 4.09 Blair Betts 4.17 Chris Drury 0.6 0.5 Dmitri Kalinin -0.8 B. Dubinsky 3.98 Fredrik Sjostrom 4.77 Paul Mara 0.5 0.9 Blair Betts -3.8 Chris Drury 3.92 Chris Drury 4.89 Wade Redden 0.3 1 Lauri Korpikoski -5.1 Aaron Voros 3.91 Scott Gomez 5.55 Dan Girardi 0.3 0.3 Dan Fritsche -8.1 Wade Redden 3.79 Dmitri Kalinin 6.01 Marc Staal 0.3 0.5 Colton Orr -12 Scott Gomez 3.59 Michal Roszival 6.97 Referee Stats For The Hawks

Referees 1st NHL Hawks Games Hawks PP’s Hawks Pens/Game Hawks PP/Game Hawks PK/ W L OTL Game PK’s Game 2 Fraser, Kerry 1980 3 14 17 10.3 4.7 5.7 3 0 0 3 Leggo, Mike 1997 3 10 15 8.3 3.3 5.0 2 0 1 4 McCauley, Wes 2003 5 11 14 5.0 2.2 2.8 2 2 0 5 Rooney, Chris 2000 ------6 Marouelli, Dan 1984 3 14 11 8.3 4.7 3.7 1 2 0 7 McCreary, Bill 1984 3 14 12 8.7 4.7 4.0 2 2 0 8 Jackson, Dave 1990 3 14 13 9.0 4.7 4.3 2 1 0 10 Devorski, Paul 1989 2 9 13 11.0 4.5 6.5 1 1 0 11 Sutherland, Kelly 2000 ------12 Koharski, Don 1981 1 6 7 13.0 6.0 7.0 1 0 0 13 O’Halloran, Dan 1995 2 12 10 11.0 6.0 5.0 1 0 1 14 LaRue, Dennis 1991 4 17 16 8.3 4.3 4.0 3 0 1 15 Auger, Stephane 2000 4 17 13 7.5 4.3 3.3 3 0 1 16 Shick, Rob 1986 1 2 2 4.0 2.0 2.0 0 0 1 18 Kimmerly, Greg 1996 5 26 25 10.2 5.2 5.0 3 2 0 20 Peel, Tim 1999 2 13 13 13.0 6.5 6.5 1 1 0 21 VanMassenhoven, Don 1993 2 6 4 5.0 3.0 2.0 1 0 1 23 Watson, Brad 1996 2 7 4 5.5 3.5 2.0 1 0 1 25 Joannette, Marc 1999 2 13 5 9.0 6.5 2.5 1 0 1 26 Martell, Rob 1996 1 3 1 4.0 3.0 1.0 1 0 0 27 Furlatt, Eric 2001 3 14 10 8.0 4.7 3.3 1 1 1 28 Lee, Chris 2001 1 5 4 9.0 5.0 4.0 1 0 0 29 Walsh, Ian 2000 1 1 3 4.0 1.0 3.0 0 1 0 30 Hasenfratz, Mike 2000 2 11 7 9.0 5.5 3.5 0 1 1 32 Kowal, Tom 2000 3 11 7 6.0 3.7 2.3 3 0 0 33 Pollock, Kevin 2000 2 7 9 8.0 3.5 4.5 1 0 1 34 Meier, Brad 1999 3 12 14 8.7 4.0 4.7 3 0 0 35 Warren, Dean 1999 ------36 Morton, Dean 2000 1 5 4 9.0 5.0 4.0 0 1 0 38 St Laurent, Francois 2006 2 14 15 14.5 7.0 7.5 1 0 1 39 Dwyer, Gord 2003 3 16 15 10.3 5.3 5.0 2 0 1 40 Kozari, Steve 2006 3 18 12 10.0 6.0 4.0 2 1 0 42 O’Rourke, Dan 1999 2 11 13 12.0 5.5 6.5 1 0 1 43 Pochmara, Brian 2006 1 4 7 11.0 4.0 7.0 1 0 0 45 St. Pierre, Justin 2003 4 19 15 8.5 4.8 3.8 2 0 2

NHL LEADERS Goals Points GAA SV%

Player Team G Player Team P Player Team GAA Player Team SV% 1 Jeff Carter PHI 29 1 Evgeni Malkin PIT 67 1 Steve Mason CBJ 1.80 1 Tim Thomas BOS .937 2 A. Ovechkin WAS 29 2 Sidney Crosby PIT 59 2 Tim Thomas BOS 2.00 2 Steve Mason BOS .936 3 Tomas Vanek BUF 27 3 A. Ovechkin WAS 57 3 M. Fernandez BOS 2.07 3 Craig Anderson FLA .933 4 NJ 25 4 Marc Savard BOS 53 4 N. Backstrom MIN 2.16 4 M. Fernandez BOS .928 5 Phil Kessel BOS 24 5 Ryan Getzlaf ANA 53 5 VAN 2.17 5 Roberto Luongo VAN .928 9 Patrick Sharp CHI 21 23 Patrick Kane CHI 42 9 N. Khabibulin CHI 2.31 8 N. Khabibulin CHI ..926 Tell Your Statistics To Shut Up Once again, our maven from Behind The Net, Hawerchuk, drops in to share some of his mature and analytical thoughts. So So splitting youth hockey into two leagues is too complicat- yeah, he totally doesn’t belong here (www.behindthenet.ca) ed even if it increases the number of players these leagues graduate to the NHL by 30%? If only it were so simple. The ratio of early-to- If you’ve got a friend in business – sales guy, MBA, doesn’t late birthdays is much higher in junior hockey than it is in the NHL, matter – you’ve probably heard him talk about Malcolm Gladwell. and so while the player development process may favor the older Gladwell writes books about unintuitive things: his 2005 book Blink, players from age 5-18, the jump from junior hockey to the NHL actu- was, if I recall correctly, about how thinking too hard on the job ally favors players born later in the year. causes people to make more mistakes. Some of you might remember that line of thinking from Bull Durham. At any rate, Gladwell’s most It’s not surprising either – a player like Patrick Kane, who recent book, Outliers, is about how success is a combination of both was born at the end of December, suddenly gained an extra year talent and surprisingly more opportunity than we of development compared to a player who was expected. born in January of the same year. After all those Behind The Net years playing in leagues where coaches were only One outlier he identifies is the distribu- concerned with how good you were going to be tion of NHL players’ birthdates: for decades, this season, the NHL is really only concerned with NHL players have been twice as likely to be born how good you’re going to be at your best, which in the first three months of the year than in the is usually when you’re in your early-to-mid-20s. last three. The reason why is fairly obvious – Even without the extra season, if you have two because little kids are divided into teams on the players with identical statistics in junior hockey, basis of what year they were born, the kids born the December player projects to score 50% more earlier in the year are, on average, bigger and points in the NHL than the player born in January, stronger and have almost an extra year of devel- largely because he’s put up those points against opment. So they’re the most likely to get picked competition that’s relatively bigger and stronger by coaches focused on having the best team over than he is. the new few months. That leads to better coach- Hawerchuk ing and competition and ultimately being more Now remember that we’re talking about likely to get picked for a better team the next all NHL players, including anyone who plays year. in even just one game. If we only look at former Canadian junior players who were in the top sixth in NHL scoring, which was anyone This effect continues all the way through Junior hockey and with 42 points or more last year, the ratio of early-to-late birthday the NHL, where the ratios of Q1 to Q4 birthdates are 3:1 and 2:1, players over the last decade is about 1.20:1. If we managed to respectively. Gladwell suggests that a lot of hockey talent is being equalize these two groups over the course of the next 25 or 30 years, squandered because professional players only started out a little bit that would ultimately add about seven Canadian players to the top better when they were kids but benefited tremendously from better sixth of the league. That’s nothing to sneeze at, but it’s not as if, as coaching and competition. In an interview with ESPN, Gladwell Gladwell suggested, we’re “squandering the talents of hundreds of said he suggested to officials from the Canadian national junior hock- boys with late birthdays” by not doing so. It turns out that the group ey team that they start a parallel league for kids born in the second where players with early birthdays are most over-represented is the half of the year, which would conceivably result in 150 additional league leaders in penalty minutes per game, and I can’t see anyone NHL players if they equalized the first and second half birthdates. getting up-in-arms about whether some kid’s December birthday kept The officials supposedly told him it was “too complicated.” him from becoming the next Ogie Ogilthorpe.

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YEAR DRAFT TRADE FREE AGENT 2008-2009 Brian Campbell (BUF 6th round 1997 Cristobal Huet (LA 7th round 2001) Matt Walker (STL 3rd round 1998) Aaron Johnson (CLB 3rd round 2001) 2007-2008 Patrick Kane (1st round) Ben Eager (PHO 1st round 2002) from Brent Sopel (VAN 6th round 1995) PHI for (FA PHI 2000) Craig Adams (HAR 9th round 1996) from CAR for future considerations. Andrew Ladd (CAR 1st round 2004) from CAR for Tuomo Ruutu (CHI 1st round 2001) 2006-2007 Jonathan Toews (1st round) Martin Havlat (OTT 1st round 1999) from OTT and Bryan Smolinski (BOS 1st round 1990) for Tom Preissing (FA SJ 2003), Josh Hennessy (SJ 2nd round 2003) and Michael Barinka (CHI 2nd round 2003) Kris Versteeg (BOS 5th round 2004) from BOS for (OTT 7th round 2001) 2005-2006 Patrick Sharp (PHI 3rd round 2001) Nikolai Khabibulin (WIN 9th round from PHI for Matt Ellison (CHI 4th 1992) round 2002) and CHI 3rd round pick 2006 2004-2005 Cam Barker (1st round) Dave Bolland (2nd round) Troy Brouwer (7th round) 2003-2004 Brent Seabrook (1st round) Colin Fraser (PHI 3rd round 2003), Dustin Byfuglien (8th round) Jim Vandermeer (PHI FA 2000) and 2004 2nd round pick from PHI for Alex Zhamnov and 2004 4th round pick (WIN 4th round 1990) 2002-2003 Duncan Keith (2nd round) James Wisniewski (5th round) Adam Burish (9th round) info in part provided by hockeyreference.com GM HISTORY COACHES Dale Tallon (2005-Present) Head Coach-Joel Quenneville Bob Pulford (Too Fucking Long, Too Many Fuck- Assistant Coach-John Torchetti ing Times) Assistant Coach-Mike Haviland Mike Smith (2001-2004) Assistant Coach- Bob Murray (1999-2000) Goaltending Coach-Stephane Waite The Making of The New York Rangers

YEAR DRAFT TRADE FREE AGENT 2008-2009 Nikolai Zherdev (CLB 1st round 2003) Markus Naslund (PIT 1st round 1991) and Dan Fritsche (CLB 2nd round Aaron Voros (NJ 6th round 2001) 2003) from CLB for Fedor Tyutin (NYR Dmitri Kalinin (BUF 1st round 1998) 2nd round 2001) and Christian Backman Wade Redden (NYI 1st round 1995) (STL 1st round 1998) 2007-2008 Fredrik Sjostrom (PHX 1st round Chris Drury (QUE 3rd round 1994) 2001), Josh Gratton (PHI Undrafted FA Scott Gomez (NJ 1st round 1998) 2004), David LeNeveu (PHX 2nd round 2002) and conditional pick for Al Mon- toya (NYR 1st round 2004) and (MON 1st round 2000) Paul Mara (TB 1st round 1997) from BOS for (WIN 1st round 1991) 2006-2007 Dan Girardi (Undrafted FA) Stephen Valiquette (LAK 8th round 1996) 2005-2006 Marc Staal (1st round) Colton Orr (BOS Undrafted FA 2001) Michal Roszival (PIT 4th round 1996) 2004-2005 Lauri Korpikoski (1st round) Brandon Dubinsky (2nd round) Ryan Callahan (4th round) 2003-2004 Nigel Dawes (5th round) Blair Betts (CAL 2nd round 1998), Jamie McLennan (NYI 3rd round 1991), and (CAL 5th round 2003) from CAL for (PHI 2nd round 1990) and 2004 7th round pick 2002-2003 Petr Prucha (8th round) 2000-2001 Henrik Lundqvist (7th round) info in part provided by hockeyreference.com

COACHES GM HISTORY Head Coach- Tom Renney 2000-Present: Glen Slather Assistant Coach- Benoit Allaire 1991-2000: Neil Smith Assistant Coach- Perry Pearn Assistant Coach- Mike Pelino The Hawks Record When...

Playing at home...... 14-2-4 Allowing a short-handed goal...... 1-1-1 Eddie O tells crew to “stop it right here!”.... 22-10-7 Playing on road...... 10-8-3 Taking 30 or more shots...... 19-7-4 Eddie O tells us D have the forwards and forwards have the D Scoring first...... 14-3-2 Taking less than 30 shots..... 5-3-1 during 4-on-4...... 22-10-7 Opponent scores first...... 10-7-5 Allowing 30 shots or more...... 11-6-5 We fantasize about shooting Eddie O.... 22-10-7 Shoot the puck bimbo scores...... 4-0-1 Allowing 30 shots or less...... 13-4-2 We’re ecstatic Pat Foley is back...... 22-8-7 Shoot the puck bimbo doesn’t score...... 10-1-3 100 Level doesn’t cheer for anthem. 14-1-4 Ice-girls wear skirts...... 6-1-3 Shoot the puck bimbo blows editors of Commited Indian..... 0-0-0 1st of a back-to-back...... 2-3-2 Ice-girls wear pants...... 3-1-0 ANYONE blows editors of Committed Indian ...... 0-1-0 2nd of a back-to-back..... 5-2-0 ice-girls wear shorts.... 5-0-1 Playing on a Monday...... 1-1-1 Opponent played night before.... 6-1-1 Ice-girls wear hideous pink outfit...... 1-0-0 Playing on a Tuesday...... 4-1-0 Seabrook gets a flat-footed penalty.... 8-2-3 Leading after 2 periods...... 19-1-3 Playing on a Wednesday...... 5-0-2 Burish takes a penalty...... 4-3-2 Losing after 2 periods...... 1-6-2 Playing on a Thursday...... 0-2-0 Keith takes a penalty...... 5-1-2 Tied after 2 periods...... 4-3-2 Playing on a Friday...... 4-2-1 Sharp takes a penalty...... 8-2-2 In overtime...... 2-2 Playing on a Saturday...... 3-3-3 Toews takes a penalty..... 6-2-2 In shootout...... 2-5 Playing on a Sunday...... 7-1-0 Havlat takes a penalty.... 5-1-0 Cam Barker plays...... 17-6-4 Savard changes lines during game... 1-2-1 Sopel takes a penalty...... 3-2-1 Cam Barker is in Rockford due to GM incompetence..... 3-2-3 Coach Q keeps lines as they are..... 23-8-6 Sopel looks 6 steps slow...... 7-5-5 Lacking a #2 center...... 24-10-7 Are out-muscled by opponent.... 7-8-3 51 Phantom blows a coverage...... 15-8-6 In 1-goal games..... 5-4-7 Outshoot opponent...... 17-5-2 Toews is trying too hard...... 3-6-2 In 2-goal games...... 6-3-0 Are outshot by opponenet.... 7-5-5 At least 1 fight in 300 Level... 2-1-2 In 3-goal games...... 6-2-0 Havlat shies from contact...... 16-6-6 No fights in 300 Level..... 12-1-2 In 4+ goal games...... 6-1-0 Patrick Kane scores...... 8-3-2 Playing Eastern Conference..... 4-2-1 Scoring 3+ goals..... 21-2-4 Jonathan Toews scores...... 5-0-3 Playing Western Conference..... 20-8-6 Scoring less than 3 goals...... 2-8-3 Martin Havlat scores...... 8-1-1 Playing Central Division...... 3-3-5 PA plays Ministry...... 0-0-0 Patrick Sharp scores...... 14-2-2 Playing Northwest Division.... 10-2-0 PA plays Modern Cock-Rock..... 13-2-4 Dustin Byfuglien scores...... 6-0-1 Playing Pacific Division 7-3-1 PA plays Classic Cock-Rock...... 9-1-4 Dustin Byfuglien turns down a hit...... 21-8-5 Playing Atlantic Division 1-1-0 PA plays P.J. Harvey...... 0-0-0 Andrew Ladd scores...... 7-0-1 Playing NASCAR Division 0-1-0 Fraser fights...... 7-2-1 Dave Bolland scores...... 6-0-1 Playing Northeast Division 3-0-1 Burish fights...... 4-1-0 Adam Burish scores...... 1-1-0, and totally ruins that joke Playing in October.... 4-3-3 Seabrook fights..... 0-0-0 51 Phantom scores...... 3-2-1 Playing in November.... 6-3-3 Barker fights...... 0-0-1 Duncan Keith scores...... 2-3-0 Playing in December...... 10-1-1 Buff fights...... 0-0-2 Brent Seabrook scores...... 4-0-0 Playing in January..... 4-3-0 Sharp fights...... 0-0-0 VerStud scores.... 8-3-1 Playing in February..... 0-0-0 Eager fights...... 8-0-1 Troy Brouwer scores.... 4-0-0 Playing in March...... 0-0-0 On Comcast...... 19-5-4 Scoring a Power Play goal...... 18-4-6 Playing in April...... 0-0-0 On WGN...... 5-3-3 Not scoring a Power Play goal... 6-6-1 UC plays really stupid goal song..... 14-1-4 On Vs...... 0-1-0 Allowing a Power Play goal...... 8-7-7 Huet’s five-hole open like Lindsay Lohan’s..... 2-5-2 On NBC.... 0-1-0 Not Allowing a Power Play goal...... 16-3-0 Getting obliterated on face-offs...... 9-7-4 Judd Sirott swears a lot off-air 24-10-7 Scoring a short-handed goal...... 3-1-0 Are even close on face-offs..... 15-3-3 Editor of Committed Indian bleeds on programs...... 1-0-0

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