The Empty Closet F ollow us on Facebook at Empty Closet News. Follow us at www.twitter.com/EmptyClosetNews local, state and national news, newsmaker interviews, opinion, entertainment, columnists, event calendars, and health resource listings number 467 a publication of the gay alliance of the genesee valley May 2013

G ay Alliance names Scott Fearing as Acting Executive Director

As the Gay Alliance celebrates its “Fabulous and Fortieth Year”, the Board of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley announced on April 23, 2013 the appointment of Mr. Scott M. Fearing to be the Acting Executive Director to lead the Agency. The Alliance would like to thank Joanne Giuffrida in her role as Business Manager for her diligent fiscal management of the agency. She has created a solid financial base for us to move forward with this very exciting appointment. (F earing continues page 2)

Choose your favorite year. L ook who’s 40 and Fabulous: Henry Schroeder By Susan Jordan Henry Schroeder is the first 40 & Fabulous donor to reach his goal of $4000. He stopped by the Gay Alliance office recently to talk about why he would like socialized with was my introduc- the Alliance to keep serving the tion to a supportive, accepting LGBT community for another community. 40 years. “Upon graduation I accepted Henry’s posting on the Fab & a job in Rochester. The gay pic- 40 website, http://www.firstgiv- nic was the first event I attended ing.com/GayAlliance/fabulous- and I met a group of people who 40-challenge is as follows: allowed me to join them for some “1982. I chose this year of the events and parties in this because it is when I decided to city. Eventually I met my best come out. I made the decision er friend and settled into a domes- y while pursuing a professional

tic partnership. I want others erm degree. I had lived in Ithaca for v who are coming out to have a O many years, sharing accommo- diverse support network avail- e dations with my two best friends able. Therefore, I have chosen : who were in a lesbian relation- to financially support as many h ship. The lesbian community we P OTO Ov local lgbt causes as possible. The The vigil at the federal courthouse on March 26 demanded an end to DOMA and Prop 8. programs that GAGV offers and the work that they do through- out the community are amaz- T he Freedom to Marry: ing. That I can help to support our community in the future Human dignity hangs in the balance through the Fabulous & Forty fund is fantastic!” By Ove Overmyer ing to a narrow majority for the to Marry. “We know we have Henry is a vet in the Chili The Supreme Court won’t first time only two years ago, momentum and the winning area. He has four cats and a black rule until June, but marriage and now up again to a significant strategy and we will see whether Lab of his own. In 1982 he was equality advocates say the jus- majority for the first time. the court delivers in June.” studying for his degree in vet- tices’ decision to tackle the issue Moreover, most Americans Wolfson said he is cautiously erinary medicine at Cornell, and on two fronts has already helped now believe the U.S. Consti- optimistic the marriage equal- was housemate to a lesbian cou- Henry Schroeder them win a victory in the court of tution should trump state laws ity movement will notch gains ple. He says, “I went to bars and public opinion. on gay marriage, a question now when the Supreme Court issues concerts with them. I had always The support for the freedom before the Supreme Court of the its opinions on California’s Prop- G ay alliance thought men were attractive but to marry reached a new high in United States (SCOTUS). Fur- osition 8 and the federal Defense just ignored those feelings and the latest ABC News/Washing- thermore, another fundamental of Marriage Act (DOMA), but he PARTNERSHIPS chose not to act on them. ton Post poll (Mar. 18, 2013), shift has transpired – just 24 per- also said activists aren’t taking a “I was in the Peace Corps in marking a dramatic change in cent now see homosexuality as wait-and-see approach. T he Gay Alliance Thailand for two years and when public attitudes on the subject a choice, down from 40 percent Legislators in four states -- appreciates the continuing I came back was leaning toward dating back one decade. Fifty- nearly 20 years ago. It’s a view Illinois, Minnesota, Rhode partnership of businesses saying I was gay, but it wasn’t eight percent of Americans now that closely defines opinions on Island and Delaware -- could vote within our community until I started at Cornell and say it should be legal for gay and the legality of same sex marriage. on same sex marriage measures FAB who support our mission ( continues page 6) lesbian couples to wed. Activists cautiously optimistic even before the justices sign off and vision. The number of mar- “I’m feeling enormously on their opinions, and advocates riage equality advocates has proud at the who’s who of Amer- (D Oma continues page 3) S ilver Level grown sharply in the ABC News/ ica that came before the court G ay student Washington Post polls, from a and the public to say it’s time for couple will attend low of 32 percent in a 2004 sur- the freedom to marry,” said Evan McQuaid ball vey of registered voters, advanc- Wolfson, founder of Freedom Contents Editorials: ...... 2 By Susan Jordan Local/State News...... 3 Two gay teens who attend National/International News..... 4 McQuaid Jesuit High School Interview: Jim Bertolone...... 7 in Brighton are being allowed Making the Scene...... 10 to attend their Junior Ball as a Shoulders To Stand On ...... 21 Columnists ...... 22 couple this month. Community ...... 25 A Change.org petition in Entertainment: Judy Gold...... 27 support of the out students was Gay Alliance News...... 30 posted online after the youth Rainbow SAGE News...... 31 asked permission to attend Calendar...... 34 Classifieds...... 34 McQuaid’s Junior Ball as a cou- mills f f ple and were apparently refused. e Proud Publisher of New York On March 13, according to Day of Silence...... Page 11 : j State’s Oldest Lgbt Newspaper

(McQuaid continues page 6) photo 2 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013 Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley G ay Alliance Board of Trustees W. Bruce Gorman, Co-President and Secretary Emily Jones, Co-President, David Zona, Treasurer, Perspectives John Altieri, Chris Hilderbrant, Jeff Markarian, Peter Mohr, Jessica Muratore, Steve Santacroce, William Schaefer T he Empty Closet Editor B oard of Trustees Susan Jordan announcement tian, Gandhi a Hindu. Both were shot by assassins. How iron- G ay Alliance names Scott Fearing PARTNERSHIPS ic that rightwing extremists, who consider themselves more Chris- as Acting Executive Director continued tian than others, obsess about their right to carry automatic weapons ( Fearing from page 1) ferent for LGBT people today. T he Gay Alliance that can slaughter dozens of people Scott joined the Alliance So, how we do our work needs appreciates the within seconds. in 2007 after serving as Senior to be different. I want the Gay continuing partnership An inspiration in our own Director of OutFront Minnesota. Alliance to be a robust and of businesses within time is the young Muslim girl As the Gay Alliance Education resilient organization, prepared our community who Malala Yousefzai, shot in the and Outreach Director he has to address the new realities that head by the Taliban for daring support our mission served as the media spokesman for the LGBT and allied commu- and vision. to stand up for girls who want the Agency for the last four years. nities face. I am exited about a to go to school. As soon as she “We are proud to hire Scott future that includes more legal B ronze Level emerged from her coma, she with his breadth of experience recognition of our individual picked up a book. She is now and the vision necessary to rights and of our families then back at school – but in Brit- create increased visibility and ever before while acknowledg- I nspirations ain, not in her home country equality for all LGBT people ing the many needs that still of Pakistan, where she inspires and their allies who are navigat- exist,” declared Scott Fearing. Courageous gay men, les- all women and girls. Maybe bians, bisexuals, trans people ing an ever-accelerating change During the past six months someday she will be able to go in legal and social acceptance,” the Board of the Gay Alliance and straight allies have long home. defended and advanced LGBT shared Board Co-Chairs, Emily has met with over 40 business When we despair about Jones and Bruce Gorman and community leaders and civil and human rights. Some our oppression in the U.S., of these inspiring activists Under Scott’s leadership in leaders of key funding agen- we should keep in mind the his role of Education and Out- cies. Scott will continue this paid the ultimate price. Har- courage of activists in coun- vey Milk immediately comes reach Director the agency has relationship building and needs tries where simply being iden- delivered nearly 200 workshops assessment work as his fore- to mind. tified as a dissident is a death Activist David Kato of and trainings each year for the most priority during his first sentence. When the Rochester past three years. This work has 60 days as the new leader of the Uganda was bludgeoned to LGBT community marches in death in 2011. Recently cler- enabled him to create broad agency. The information gath- July, we’ll encounter the usual cross-cultural relationships ered will inform the vision and gy who oppose LGBT people’s bigots with megaphones. But right to exist held a triumphant throughout upstate New York. work of the agency during this we will also be walking with Scott has been responsible for incredible transformative time hate rally at Kato’s gravesite, police protection and accom- within view of his grieving delivering workshops to social in LGBT history. panied by a city fire engine, and civic institutions, includ- The Alliance looks forward mother. which will probably turn on its In a way, the haters and ing businesses, churches, police to the dynamic and creative siren to drown out the screams departments and schools. leadership that Scott will bring killers are actually defeating of hate. themselves by demonstrating “The opportunity to lead to this new role. As the Alli- One never knows when the Gay Alliance comes at an ance celebrates its “Fabulous their own moral bankruptcy. violence will strike in these David Kato will never be for- important point in the orga- and Fortieth Anniversary” and days of constant bombings nizations’ history. As the Gay leads “Pride” to a new level of gotten, and as brave Ugandan and shootings. But if we were activists gradually change their Alliance celebrates its 40th inclusivity and fun, the agency marching in Uganda, Russia or Anniversary it is important to will look to Scott for new areas society, he will come to be many other places, we would revered as a hero and martyr. remember that the good work in which LGBT people will no most surely face bludgeons and of the past means that life is dif- longer strive but will thrive. ■ In a similar fashion, the bullets, not just ugly words. hate groups in this country, And police would definitely such as NOM, the KKK and not protect us or investigate the Westboro Baptist Church, our murders. are unintentionally doing their As a white middle class Champion Level targets a favor. Their actions North American lesbian, I are so extreme, despicable and am safer than my activist sis- irrational that they provide ters and brothers in the Third the heterosexual public with World, and safer than my unforgettable examples of why activist sisters and brothers of LGBT activism is necessary. color in this country. Their Everyone knows that apos- supreme courage will inspire tles of freedom and non-vio- the oppressed of the world Healthcare providers got an education at the Transgender Health- lence Dr. Martin Luther King until all oppression ends. ■ care Conference at UR on March 1. L-R: Scott Fearing, Gay Alliance and Mahatma Gandhi also Education Director; Dr. Linda Chaudron, Conference Activity Direc- had to pay that ultimate price. tor; Jason Ballard and Rowan Collins of TheSelfMadeMen and Gay Both were inspired by their Alliance Speakers Bureau; Jeanne Gainsburg, Gay Alliance Out- religious faith – King a Chris- reach Coordinator.

5/13 Equal=Grounds Name Coffee House & Gift House The Gay Alliance: Address Forty years of City/State/Zip advocating for the Phone E-mail

fair and equal treatment Membership Levels: ❏ $30-99 Advocate ❏ $100-999 Champion of all people, regardless ❏ $1,000-4,999 Triangle Club ❏ $5,000+ Stonewall ❏ Check enclosed in the amount of ______(check #______) of their sexual orientation, Please charge my credit card in the amount of ______To: ❏ American Express, ❏ Discover, ❏ MasterCard, ❏ Visa Credit card # ______Exp. Date: ______gender identity or gender ❏ I would be proud to have my donation publicly acknowledged. Friend Level ❏ Please provide me Rainbow SAGE program news (age 50 & over). expression. B enefits include: Subscription to The Empty Closet mailed to home or work, plus privileges at each level. Phone: 585 244-8640 or mail to: Gay Join us for forty more! Alliance, 875 E. Main St., Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605. Home delivery of the Empty Closet is free with your annual membership in the Gay Alliance. y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 3

page one Kelli McMahon passes; worked with Health Department, Finger ( DOma from page 1) Lakes Health Systems are turning their attention from Washington to the statehouses. Kelli Elizabeth McMahon: Peacefully passed into the During the SCOTUS oral arms of the angels on Feb. 19, 2013, at the young age of arguments last February – the 56 after a short but courageous battle with Alzheimer’s dis- cases challenging Califor- ease. Kelli left this world surrounded by those who loved nia’s Proposition 8 which bans her the most. gay marriage in that state, and Kelli was born in Carthage N.Y. and graduated from DOMA, a 1996 federal law Carthage Central Junior Senior High School. She went on defining marriage as between a to earn her master’s in Public Administration from SUNY man and a woman – revealed Brockport and dedicated most of her life career in the field a Court that is deeply divided of education and elimination of HIV/AIDS in the Roches- about marriage equality. That is ter community. hardly surprising, since the Court At the March 26 vigil. Photo: Bess Watts Those that know Kelli know that she loved to be on is often divided along predictable the water, loving her dogs, being part of nature, especially lines on controversial issues. But law in Texas and, by extension, tion to exclude gays and lesbians the birds, and maintaining beautiful gardens. She had a the arguments also reflected sur- invalidated sodomy laws in thir- from marriage. That would pave tremendous love for her family and friends and lived every prising consensus. teen other states, making same- the way for same sex marriages to moment for music and dancing. She will be missed by her The oral arguments provided sex sexual activity legal in every resume once again in the Golden friends and family and especially Sabrina, who deeply loved still further evidence that our U.S. state and territory. The State. The Court is more likely and cared for Kelli throughout the long goodbye, and Judy, culture’s understanding of the Court overturned its previous to decide the DOMA case on who stood by her through it all. issue has quickly shifted in the ruling on the same issue in the its merits and to agree with the She is also survived by her loving family, especially her past few months – and continues 1986 case Bowers v. Hardwick, intermediate federal courts who brother and sister in law, Kurt and Alice Koniz, cousins to rapidly evolve. Nonetheless, where it upheld a challenged have unanimously struck it down Tina O’Neill and Krystal Koszlowski and several others. several justices expressed concern Georgia statute and did not find no less than 14 times. Kelli’s journey was filled with special people. Howev- about a sweeping intervention a constitutional protection of sex- The Court’s four liberal jus- er, special thanks are given to the loving and caring staff in this ongoing heated national ual privacy. However, the fact tices made clear that they see of Crimson Ridge Gardens and 4-Reservoir at St. John’s debate. remains that the struggle for mar- no good reason for excluding Home. Kelli was cared for with dignity, love and respect in Additionally, because both riage equality across the nation is gays and lesbians from mar- her last days because of them. cases offer avenues for resolution far from over and will no doubt riage under state or federal law, A celebration of her life was held on March 3 at Mary that allow the Court to avoid continue for many, many years and Justice Kennedy, the likely Magdalene Church, 401 Main St., East Rochester. deciding the ultimate question to come. swing vote, repeatedly expressed Donations may be made in Kelli’s honor to St. John’s of marriage equality, neither is What will SCOTUS do? concern that DOMA interferes Home Foundation, 150 Highland Ave., Rochester 14620. likely to be a landmark decision Most SCOTUS observers improperly with the states’ power To share a special memory, visit www.NewcomerRoches- along the lines of Brown v. Board predict a dismissal of the Prop to regulate marriage. The fact ter.com. of Education, which proclaimed 8 California appeal for lack of that marriage is the province of an end to racial segregation, or standing, which seems likely, and the states makes any purported the landmark case Lawrence v. would leave for another day the federal justification for treating Texas. In that 6–3 ruling, the question of whether states have same sex marriages differently Court considered Prop 8, which authentic lives.” Court struck down the sodomy the power under the Constitu- substantially weaker. But by the invalidated the marriages of Cal- NYS Assembly member Harry same token, a decision declaring ifornia couples. The next day, Bronson said that in 2011 when DOMA unconstitutional in part March 27, the justices held a marriage equality was debated on on this basis would also leave the hearing on DOMA, the Defense the floor of the NYS legislature, F abulous Members question whether or not states of Marriage Act, put in place by he had declared that this was a The Gay Alliance is very proud to be celebrating its 40th may deny marriage to same-sex conservatives to prevent LGBT historical moment. “For the first anniversary of working with LGBT and allied community couples. Thus, neither case is couples’ legal marriages from time, we recognized LGBT peo- members of all ages. Our life changing work is dependent on likely to provide a definitive reso- being recognized by the federal ple as citizens… (But) we realized the generous support of individuals. Here are the names of lution to the broader issue. government. our work was not done; as long as people who supported our life changing work by becoming Local marriage equality advo- The Court’s rulings on the the federal government and other members with gifts of $30 or more during the first quarter cate Anne Tischer told the EC, two issues are expected in late states are allowed to discriminate of 2013. Please help us to celebrate our anniversary by sup- “The U.S. Constitution is not a June. our marriages would not be rec- porting our Fabulous and 40 campaign. Become a fabulous static entity; it’s a living, breath- Anne Tischer of Equality ognized…. supporter by clicking on the Fabulous and 40 button on our ing document. It reflects the Rochester, who organized the “All people are created equal. homepage: www.GayAlliance.org nation’s deepest commitments vigil, with her partner Bess Watts It is wrong for the federal govern- and it amends and adapts as of Pride at Work AFL CIO, was ment and California to deny that Wanda Acevedo, John Altieri, Kaaren Anderson, Alexander those commitments evolve over the first to speak. equality and allow the majority to Andrasik, K”Lea Andreas, Joan Arthur, Ruth Atwater, Eve- time as deemed necessary by the Anne said that although she oppress the rights of a minority. lyn Bailey, Gregory Balzano, Jason Barnecut, Pamela Barres, citizenry.” is a good citizen who votes, pays We are here today and across the Christopher Barry, Barb Bonin, Dawn Borgeest, Terry Boyd, Tischer added, “At some point taxes and works for her church, country to express our concern Mildred Boylan, Ed Brockenbrough, Carolyn Burch, Mat- in the near future, the Supreme she is treated as a second-class cit- to the Supreme Court, but also thew Burns, Daniel Callan, Christopher Carretta, Ralph Cart- Court will eventually have to rec- izen under DOMA. “I know that to advocate for public opinion er, Robert Casey, Heidi Chapman, Judith Chryst, Sherman ognize, squarely and clearly, that justice is going to happen,” she to support the rights of gay and Clarke, Patricia Cole, Walter Colley, Catherine Conheady, John it is unconstitutional to exclude said. “In the core of our hearts, lesbian individuals. You are all a Cortinas, Susan Cowell, Judy Cranston, Susan Cunningham, gays and lesbians from being Americans are fair-minded.” She part of history – your voices will Allan Cuseo, Debra Darrow, William Destevens, Gretchen granted federal benefits [and bur- led the crowd in the Pledge of be heard for decades to come,” Dewan, Melanie Duguid-May, Denise Dyson, Rick Easterly, dens] of marriage. Very soon you Allegiance. Bronson concluded. Richard Easton, Joshua Einhorn, M. Elzenga, Jeffrey Epstein, will see the majority of Ameri- Jo Meleca Voigt of Mar- Other politicians present Louise Epstein, Scott Fearing, Joshua Fegley, Jeffrey Fielo, Lois cans view anti-gay-marriage laws riage Equality USA said, “I’m a included City Council member Filreis, Dennis Foley, Lauren Frank, Scott Franklin, Larry with the same condemnation as Rochestarian, wife to an amaz- Matt Haag, Monroe County Fredrickson, David Freedman, David Frier, Jill Frier, Jeanne anti-miscegenation laws.” ing woman, an advocate and a Legislature Minority Leader Car- Gainsburg, Julie Gainsburg, Roy Gainsburg, Lewis Gedi- In the meantime, pro-mar- citizen of the United States of rie Andrews, and Brighton Town man, Harris Gelbard, Esther Germanow, Jerrold Gold, Sue riage equality advocates are sit- America. There are no words to Supervisor Bill Moehle. Goodrich, Judith Goonan, W. Bruce Gorman, Christine Gra- express what I’m feeling.” She Strong labor support came ziano, Arthur Greenland, Robert Grygier, Lois Hainsworth, ting on pins and needles until the federal Court makes its decisions described frustration, anger and from Fareed Mischelen, director Paulette Hall, Valerie Hall, Bonnie Hallman-Dye, Diane Ham- sadness at the denial of rights to of constituency groups for the mar, Daniel Hare, Marla Hassner, Keith Helmicki, Jeff Hofer, public. Bess Watts, president of the Rochester Chapter of Pride loving couples and families, and NYS AFL-CIO, who said that he Martha Howden, Ally Howell, Sue Hughes, Martin Ippolito, “a deep sense of indignity” caused enjoys the institution of marriage, Rochelle Jacobs, Steven Jarose, Amy Jerum, Kenneth Johnson, at Work, AFL-CIO, told the EC, “Everybody is feeling a little anx- when gay Americans are denied which is his right as a hetero- Emily Jones, Patricia Jones, Amy Judson, Heidi Kaiser, Shirley their civil rights “for leading our (V igil continues page 6) King, Liz Konar, Kathryn Korol, Joel Kremer, Matt Krueger, ious right now because our equal- Ronald Kwasman, Patrice Lancelot, Jennifer Leonard, Daniel ity is on the line.” Lewis, Mark Lilakos, Jesse Lombardo, Andrew London, Nich- She added, “What is at stake with these two decisions is our olas Love, Dayanara Luciano, Peter Macdowell, Laurie Man- S usan B. Anthony House spring luncheon cuso, Jennifer Mathews, Leslie Mauro, Mikaela Mazzer, Tracy dignity as American citizens. All Mevs, Bud Minard, Jon Mink, Peter Mohr, Kevin Mumper, we want is the same rights, the is May 10 at the Chatterbox Club same treatment, the same due Francis Novak III, Thomas Ophardt, Deb Oppenheimer, Lori Friends of Susan B. Anthony House, a volunteer organization that Orman, Lawrence Orto, Bliss Owen, Diane Palmeri, Chuck process of law, nothing more and nothing less.” supports the work and mission of the National Susan B. Anthony Perry, Jason Pleau, Thomas Privitere, E. Quatro, Bill Reamy, Museum & House, announces that its annual spring luncheon will be Eric Rodli, Rebekah Rosenfeld, David Runzo, Joseph Russo, held on Friday, May 10, at the Chatterbox Club, 25 North Goodman Michael Russo, Tara Russow, Daniel Sapper, Bryan Schaefer, V igil at federal St., beginning at 11:30 a.m. Susan Schiefelbein, Henry Schroeder, Bruce Smail, Lawrence courthouse The guest speaker is Dr. Catherine Cerulli, Director of the Antho- Solan, Jacqueline Stewart, Lorraine Stricof, Rachel Stricof, protests DOMA ny Center for Women’s Leadership and the Laboratory of Interperson- Janice Theodoroff, Jean Thibodeau, Amanda Tierson, Anne al Violence and Victimization at the University of Rochester. Tickets Tischer, Gary Vedvik, Michelle Wallen, Bess Watts, Robin By Susan Jordan are $35 per person. Wellum, Jamie Whitbeck, Cynthia Woolbright, Jeff Wyatt, Joe Over 100 people took part in For more information, please contact Deborah L. Hughes, presi- Yokajty, David Zona a vigil at the federal courthouse dent and CEO, National Susan B. Anthony Museum and House® at on March 26, as the Supreme 585-279-7490, ext. 13. ■ 4 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

cally necessary for transgender patients. G ay man arrested for A 2008 study conducted by Trans- gender Law Center found that an alarm- not leaving partner’s NewsFronts ingly high number of transgender patients hospital bed were denied coverage for essential health care. Fifteen percent were outright denied A gay man in Missouri has been arrest- gender-specific care such as pap-smears ed after refusing to leave his partner’s national and international or prostate exams just because they were hospital beside when the ill man’s fam- transgender. ily demanded that he be ejected from the premises. Via Raw Story: Roger Gorley told WDAF that even M ontana ends though he has power of attorney to han- criminalization of dle his partner’s affairs, a family mem- homosexuality ber asked him to leave when he visited Research Medical Center in Kansas City Montana Rep. Bryce Bennett gave a on April 9. powerful speech in April in support of Gorley said he refused to leave his repealing the state’s statutes which crimi- partner Allen’s bedside, and that’s when nalize gay sex. The Montana House took security put him in handcuffs and escort- a vote on it April 9, and it was decisive, the ed him from the building. “I was not rec- Billings Gazette reports: ognized as being the husband, I wasn’t After a half-hour of emotional debate recognized as being the partner,” Gorley for and against the measure, the House explained. voted 64-36 to endorse Senate Bill 107, The Trans 100. He said the nurse refused to confirm one day after House members narrow- that the couple shared power of attorney ly voted to remove it from the House and made medical decision for each other. GLAA D launches “Trans insurance exclusions that limit access to Judiciary Committee, where it had been “She didn’t even bother to look it up, to 100” list for visibility medically necessary care for transgender tabled on a party-line vote with Republi- check in to it,” the Lee’s Summit resident patients. cans in favor. recalled. In March GLAAD president Herndon Speaker Pérez said, “This is an impor- “It’s not about encouraging a lifestyle,” The arrested man is now under a Graddick declared his organization’s focus tant step in protecting the health of all said Rep. Bryce Bennett, D-Missoula, one restraining order and may not enter the on transgender equality. Now GLAAD Californians, including transgender indi- of the Legislature’s only openly gay mem- hospital grounds at all. A hospital spokes- points to the launch of the “Trans 100,” a viduals. No Californian should be denied bers. “It’s simply about respecting privacy man has issued a statement. “We believe listing of transgender activists working to care and treatment because of their gender between two adults. … It’s just as simple involving the family is an important part advance the cause across the nation. identity or expression. Implementation of as saying that all Montanans deserve dig- of the patient care process. And the GLAAD is proud to sponsor the California’s Insurance Gender Nondis- nity and respect.” patient’s needs are always our first prior- inaugural Trans 100 and honored that crimination Act (IGNA) is a simple mat- Twenty-five Republicans joined all 39 ity. When anyone becomes disruptive to GLAAD board member and author Jenny ter of fairness and equality in health care. House Democrats to support the bill, providing the necessary patient care, we Boylan was included. I commend the Department of Managed which removes gay sex from the definition involve our security team to help calm the “The Trans 100 will bring much-need- Health Care for issuing its Director’s Let- of the crime of “deviate sexual relations,” situation and to protect our patients and ed visibility to the critical, grassroots work ter reminding health care service plans of a felony that carries a penalty of up to staff. If the situation continues to escalate, that trans people have been doing in com- their obligation to comply with IGNA.” 10 years in prison and a fine of $50,000. we have no choice but to request police munities across the country for years,” “This one letter will save lives,” said Thirty-eight Republicans voted to keep assistance.” said Wilson Cruz of GLAAD. “While Masen Davis, Executive Director of Trans- the unconstitutional language on Mon- The arrested man says he and his part- media coverage so often misses the mark gender Law Center. “For years, trans- tana’s books. ner were joined in a civil union five years on accurate portrayals of trans people, gender Californians have been denied GOP Rep. Kerns’ stance, and the fact ago. Civil unions, of course, are not legal- the Trans 100 is changing the game by coverage of basic care merely because of that 38 Republicans effectively voted to ly recognized by the state of Missouri. – sharing the inspiring and diverse stories who we are. Discriminatory insurance keep gay sex a felony, incensed Rep. Aman- JoeMyGod.com behind trans advocacy.” exclusions put transgender people and our da Curtis (D-Butte). “It was so hard to sit RELATED: In 2010 President Obama families at risk for health problems and through that and not walk across the floor mandated that any hospital that receives C alifornia guarantees financial hardship. Now we can finally and punch him,” Curtis said of Kerns in federal funding such as Medicare or Med- get the care we need.” a video uploaded on YouTube. “That’s so icaid must allow visitation privileges for trans medical insurance The DMHC directive applies to offensive. Talk about starting a fight. same-sex partners. HMOs and PPOs regulated by the “...To say that our friends and our California’s Department of Managed Department of Managed Health Care. In neighbors and our brothers and sisters and Health Care (DMHC) has issued guid- 2012, the Department of Insurance issued our cousins, aunts and uncles should be fel- A labama bill would end ance clarifying the obligations of Cali- non-discrimination regulations with simi- ons, and we support this because the Bible “gay is illegal” sex ed fornia’s health plans under the Insurance lar protections for health insurance regu- says so?... It’s wrong,” Curtis railed, accus- Gender Nondiscrimination Act. lated by the Department of Insurance. ing two of the Republican lawmakers who A new “Oppose hate in the classroom” In a groundbreaking directive to health Combined, this means that all California oppose the bill of “promoting hate.” bill was introduced on April 2 in Alabama plans, the DMHC confirmed April 9 health plans and insurers cannot arbitrari- Buzzfeed’s Chris Geidner spoke with to remove a requirement that sexual edu- that California’s Insurance Non-Discrim- ly deny medically necessary services pro- Bennett following the second reading of cation teachers tell students that being gay ination Act of 2006, authored by former vided to other policy holders or members the bill: is “a criminal offense” and “not an accept- Assemblymember Paul Koretz, guaran- simply because the patient is transgender. “It feels like we’re entering a new day able lifestyle to the general public.” tees all people the right to access coverage The newly issued DMHC letter in the state... and people are ready to move All Out, a global movement for LGBT for medically necessary care regardless of instructs health plans to revise current on from this discussion of whether homo- equality, along with Advocates for Youth their gender identity or gender expression. plan documents to remove exclusions sexuality should be legal or not,” Bennett and AIDS Alabama, has launched a peti- The directive also provides that patients and limitations related to gender transi- told BuzzFeed shortly after the second tion to call on Alabama lawmakers to who are denied coverage can appeal the tion. For transgender people, how and reading of the bill..... swiftly pass the bill and stop lying to decision for review by the Department. when they transition is typically a pri- “While it’s exciting that we got to this young people. Transgender Law Center applauds the vate decision made with their doctor. The point ... we’ve got a number of steps to “Right now, Alabama is forcing teach- DMHC, Governor Jerry Brown, Insur- American Medical Association, American take forward before we can tackle other ers to lie to students and tell them that it’s ance Commissioner Dave Jones, the Psychological Association, American Psy- issues to make sure everyone in our state illegal to be gay. This despicable mis-edu- Assembly Speaker John A. Pérez, and chiatric Association, and the American is truly equal,” he said. cation must be repealed without delay,” the Legislative LGBT Caucus for their Academy of Family Physicians have all Read more: http://www.towleroad. said Andre Banks, Executive Director and commitment to ending discriminatory deemed transition-related care to be medi- com/#ixzz2Q4BFpG7r co-founder of All Out. “All around the y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 5 world young people face stigma, shame but the organization’s board must still service members in obtaining professional are frequently locked out of asylum pro- and bullying at school because they are vote in May on whether to ratify the reso- licenses during their time in the state, tections when they come here fleeing lesbian, gay, bi, trans -- or even just ques- lution. If the vote is approved, “no youth while signing an identical bill to help only anti-trans violence, denied recognition tioning their sexual orientation or gender may be denied membership in the Boy straight spouses. for their families, subjected to especially identity. Alabama needs to move out of Scouts of America on the basis of sexual Republicans across the country are harsh and dangerous detention condi- the dark ages and make it legal for teach- orientation or preference alone,” Deron coming out for equality. But not in New tions, and often deported back into harm’s ers to spread the facts about sexuality Smith, the organization’s spokesman, told Mexico, and certainly not Gov. Susana way. This goes to the core of what NCTE rather than damaging propaganda.” Reuters. Martinez. stands for.” The spokesman says the resolution The legislature sent the Republican Statement signatories include local Delaware House draws on three months of discussions, governor two versions of the same bill, and national transgender advocacy groups surveys, and research. HB180 and SB258, making it easier for from across the U.S. including The Trans committee passes UPDATE: The Courage Campaign the state to help our active duty and People of Color Coalition, Gender Justice marriage equality reacts. retired service members and their spous- Nevada, and The TransLatin@ Coalition. “Despite the efforts of a vocal minor- es obtain professional licenses like those “Immigration is an issue that impacts Delaware’s House Administration ity, from politics to business to culture, issued from the state for contractors and us all and reform is necessary as the racial Committee has passed its marriage equal- we are seeing a rapid and historic shift barbers. and ethnic composition of our country has ity bill, HB75, by a vote of 4-1. It now towards equality for all. The Boy Scouts The only difference? The Senate ver- vastly changed over the past few decades. goes to the House floor. are now beginning to catching up with sion contained an amendment, offered These concerns must be addressed for us Among those testifying was Richard this reality. This is yet another step in the by Sen. Jacob Candelaria (the state’s only to move forward on every issue from the Smith, president of the Delaware chap- right direction towards ending discrimi- openly gay member), to be sure domestic economy to education. Everyone deserves ter of the NAACP. “We believe marriage nation against LGBT youth across this partners of gay service members would be fair and just immigration policies that equality is a civil right,” Smith told law- country. Yet, the Boy Scouts need to go covered too. ensures dignity and respect,” said Kylar makers. further and end all discrimination within On April 5 she made her choice: Gov- W. Broadus, founder of the Trans People Jared and Jordan spoke on behalf of their organization. Discrimination and ernor Martinez pocket vetoed the version of Color Coalition (TPOCC) their two-mom family. “No child should hatred have no place in a country found- to extend help to partners of gay service Jane Heenan, co-director of Gen- have to fight for their hardworking, dedi- ed on the principles of liberty, justice and members. der Justice Nevada, said, “Immigration cated parents to have the same rights as equality.” “In the post-‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ reform is important because trans com- other parents,” Jordan said. The AP writes: Under pressure over era, openly gay service members are munities suffer specific and sometimes Opponents said they oppose the mea- its longstanding ban on gays, the Boys proudly serving and dying for our coun- unspeakable harm from current policies. sure because it would force religious Scouts of America is proposing to lift try. And their partners back home bear From the pervasive discrimination that groups to marry gay couples; this is not the ban for youth members but con- the same burdens as their straight neigh- keeps trans people from meeting employ- the case. tinue to exclude gays as adult leaders. bors,” says Pat Davis of ProgressNow New ment requirements to the unreasonable- The current state senate is split 13-8 The Scouts announced Friday that it Mexico, a non-profit advocacy work advo- ness of immediately disclosing anti-trans for the Democrats. Gov. Jack Markell has would submit this proposal to the rough- cating for LGBT equality and progressive persecution to officials, the current system supported gay marriage for years. All the ly 1,400 voting members of its National issues in the state. does not work for trans communities.” Delaware legislature needs to do is alter Council at a meeting in Texas the week “The rest of the country has moved Bamby Salcedo, founder and presi- Delaware’s statute on marriage, which of May 20. forward and understands the sacrifice our dent of The TransLatin@ Coalition said, prohibits unions between “people of the The resolution must still be ratified by proud gay service members make. There “Immigration issues are trans issues and same gender.” the organization’s board in May. is no excuse in today’s age for signing a there are many trans brothers and sis- Crafting of the bill has been led by bill that intentionally thumbs one’s nose ters that are in the shadows because they members of the gay rights group Equal- I owa celebrates fourth at our gay soldiers unless you believe that may be undocumented, or they may have ity Delaware. Markell has pledged to sign their service and sacrifice is somehow less a loved one that is undocumented or the bill if it passes the General Assem- year of marriage equality important.” detained in an Immigration and Customs bly, where it has the support of Demo- One Iowa cheered via press release: A CBS News poll conducted after the Enforcement detention center. We need cratic leaders in both chambers. In 2011, April 3 marked the four-year anniver- repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell found that to support immigration reform because Markell signed a bill authorizing same-sex sary of the historic marriage decision in more Republicans favored allowing gays it will provide a better way of life for civil unions in Delaware, effective last Iowa. to serve in the military than opposed. many people who are still in the shadows, year. On April 3, 2009, the Iowa State Martinez signed HB180, providing including trans people.” The Washington Blade has more: “We Supreme Court unanimously ruled that job assistance to straight military couples want to make sure that everything is lined excluding gay and lesbian couples from on March 26. She pocket vetoed SB258 R eport covers marriage up that we’ve got a bill that’s legally and marriage violated the equal protection on Friday, April 5 when time to act on equality support state by technically perfect that way there can be clause of the state Constitution. Since legislation from the 2013 legislative ses- no question,” [Rep. Melanie] Smith said. then, roughly 6,000 couples have wed in sion expired. state since 2004 “It’s such a controversial issue from some Iowa. people’s perspective that we don’t want Every state has seen increases in sup- The case was Varnum v. Brien. O ver 30 trans groups port for same-sex marriage over the last folks picking apart the bill on technical “Iowa is a better place because of mar- matters or anything along those lines.” back immigration reform eight years, according to new analysis by riage equality. For four years now, gay and Williams Institute Public Opinion Proj- Attorney General Beau Biden; U.S. lesbian couples have been able to stand up Sens. Chris Coons and Tom Carper; Con- On April 10, as thousands marched in ect Director Andrew Flores and Williams in front of friends and family and make the nation’s capital in support of immi- Senior Scholar of Public Policy Scott Bar- gressman John Carney and John Fluharty, that lifelong commitment to one another the gay executive director of the Delaware gration reform, the National Center clay. and to have that commitment recognized for Transgender Equality and over 30 “Public Support for Marriage for Republican Party, are among those who by their state. To hear those words ‘by the support nuptials for gays and lesbians. transgender service and advocacy groups Same-sex Couples by State” examines power vested in me by the state of Iowa’ released a Statement of Principles on public support for same-sex marriage, is powerful,” said Donna Red Wing, One Immigration Reform. by state, and reveals the current position S couts may end ban on Iowa Executive Director. The statement outlines fundamental of each state’s general population on the gay members but not That case was first filed in 2005 by policies critical for reform that affect the legality of same-sex marriage, how public openly gay leaders Lambda Legal. estimated 20,000 undocumented trans- opinion differs across the fifty states and -JoeMyGod.com gender adults in the U.S., and thousands the District of Columbia, and the change The Boy Scouts appear set to end their of transgender youth who came to the in public opinion since 2004. ban on gay scouts. Openly gay leaders, it NM governor vetoes help U.S. at an early age and also lack legal Main findings from the report include: appears, will remain banned. Reuters has for gay military families status. By the end of 2012, California, Col- the news: NCTE Director of Policy Harper Jean orado, Connecticut, Hawaii, Maine, The Boy Scouts of America called to Republican Governor Susana Marti- Tobin said, “For thousands of transgen- Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York, end a long-standing ban on openly gay nez has vetoed a bill to provide assistance der immigrants and their families, the Oregon, Rhode Island, Vermont, and members, a spokesman said on April 19, to families of active duty and veteran gay need for reform is especially urgent. They (R eport continued page 6) 6 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

people. It’s about DOMA being unconsti- touch! You are invited to join Henry and the page one tutional.” “In the past seven years poll numbers other initial members of the “Fab 40”: City Council member Matt Haag said, have been flipped. Seven years ago 58 Pam Barres, Micheal Faucher, Bruce Gor- “In the next few days and weeks we must percent of Americans polled in an ABC man, Ralph Carter, Van VanZanten, Dan ( Vigil continued from page 3) hope, pray and meditate that the Supreme News Washington Post survey were against Meyers, Jennifer Leonard, Peter Mohr, Court will reflect society’s change. It’s the marriage equality. Today 58 percent of Bill Valenti, Emily Jones, Joe Nardone, sexual. He added, “It’s an institution that Americans polled are in favor of marriage John Altieri, David Frier, Chris Hilder- doesn’t set up gender or sexual orientation Court’s job to protect minorities oppressed by the majority. Today’s a day for opti- equality. brandt, Jason Barnecut, David Zona, Jes- lines… we in labor don’t see differences “Among young Americans, 81 percent sica Muratore, Evelyn Bailey and Steve among people; we see haves and have-nots, mism. We’re seeing the world change before our eyes.” in the 18-29 age group endorsed marriage Santacroce, as well as the staff at the Gay we see injustice and we can’t tolerate that. equality. Alliance, who have each chosen a year near It’s time this country stopped building Temple Sinai sent a message; members were unable to attend because it was Pass- “The legalization of same-sex marriage and dear to their hearts so that this orga- walls to keep people out, and started let- takes nothing from anyone, other than nization will be here for another 40 years. ting people in.” over. The message stated that Passover is the time when Jews retell the story of being the illusion, which is all it is and ever was, Please sign up by sending an email to Bill Moehle said, “We can talk about that healthy, nurturing relationships are Emily Jones ([email protected] or Bruce legal issues, and lawyers will talk for years. slaves in Egypt. “We’re on a journey started 4,000 years ago to increase freedom and reserved for people of opposite sexes. Gorman ([email protected]) But we are talking today about fundamen- “Fairness is where we are heading, our The need to empower pride and self tal civil rights for ALL Americans. When equality around the world… Temple Sinai is committed to providing a welcoming trajectory is undeniable and the trend line respect in all individuals is as important one group has rights taken away, we all is clear. today as the day we opened in 1973. So have rights taken away. No matter what spiritual home to all. We must expand ‘We the People’ to include all Americans.” “It would be wise for the Supreme chose your favorite year and let’s get this happens, we’re seeing the community all Court to be handmaidens of history rather party started! Go to the Gay Alliance web- around the country changing. Change is The Reverend Tom Decker, Interim Pastor of Open Arms Metropolitan Com- than to sit this one out. The final chapter site www.gayalliance.org and click on the going to come.” of this story has been written!” Fabulous & 40 icon today! ■ Pediatrician Dr. Kate Greenburg said munity Church, said, “I’m coming to you today as a voice from the future.” He said Ralph Carter of Out & Equal stated, she wants youth to lead healthy, happy lives. “President Obama said, ‘Our journey is not “No law should keep them from being free that as someone born in Europe and raised in Australia, who had lived in Canada complete until our gay and lesbian broth- citizens… I want my daughter to know she ers and sisters have equal rights.’ A new can be whoever she wants to be when she for 18 years before coming to Rochester, (McQuaid continued from page 1) he has witnessed the gradual advances in day is dawning. We might help our world the gay blog towleroad.com, and several grows up.” be better, brighter and more fabulous!” He Colin O’Malley of Metro Justice Canadian acceptance of LGBT rights. He Empty Closet sources, a gay McQuaid stu- pointed out that civilization did not end said that the civil rights advances of Selma, dent called the Brother Wease show (The emphasized, “We’ve already won… If Seneca Falls and Stonewall all took hard you’re under 30 in this country right now in Canada when same sex couples won the Brew) and indicated that he and a male date right to marry legally. “Straight folks still work and that we are not afraid of hard had asked their McQuaid school counselor it’s an absurdity to even talk about this…. work. He ended with Dr. Martin Luther Courts and legislatures are lagging behind get married and we haven’t issued licenses whether it would be any problem for them for someone to marry their dog. But peo- King’s famous quotation, “The arc of the to attend the McQuaid prom as a couple. popular will. No matter what happens moral universe is long, but it bends toward tomorrow, we’ve won as long as this sort of ple who love each other and want to spend Allegedly, after two weeks of decision-mak- their lives together can share their lives. justice.” ing from administration and above, the energy keeps up.” Perhaps the most moving comments Thomas Warfield, choreographer and That’s what this is all about. youths’ request was rejected, although this “Marriage is a right not up for popu- of the day were those of Dick and Tammy has been denied by the school. RIT associate professor, said, “There is a Beebe, who talked about their daughter’s revolution occurring; an evolution of our lar vote. Fifty-eight percent support us The Brew (Wease) website story: “After now, but it’s really an inalienable right and coming out to them as a lesbian. At the yesterday’s show Pauly was approached by mind and heart.” He recalled the emo- time they lived in a small town of 3,000 tions in New York City on the day when shouldn’t be up for popular vote.” someone close to a story he tells us about Emily Jones and W. Bruce Gorman, co- people, and Dick Beebe said, “We have today. At McQuaid high school there are marriage equality became law, and said, a straight son and a gay daughter and “This must have been how my parents and presidents of the Gay Alliance board, both a couple gay kids (a junior and a sopho- spoke. Emily Jones said, “The Gay Alliance are very proud of both. About 20 years more) that are out, popular, and accepted grandparents felt during the civil rights ago, our daughter told us she was gay. It advances of the ‘50s and ‘60s… We inter- is 40 years old. We have been advocating by their peers. for social justice… we have educated cor- wasn’t much of a shock, we accepted it and “With prom season coming up this sect… each one of us has the power to became a safe house for friends of hers who transform the community we live in and porations, colleges, churches, and small couple went to their school counselor businesses, and are proud to have worked had been shunned by their own families. to see if it was an issue for them to go the relationships we cherish.” To this day, we still have lots of kids!... Ally Linda Donohue of Cornell Indus- with so many of you to get to this moment together as a couple. After a couple weeks I will never back down from defending of the school deliberating, and talking to trial Labor Relations joked, “I am not afraid in time.” equality. I will always be there.” of you! I have friends who are gay and les- Bruce Gorman said, “No matter what their superiors, the couple was denied the Tammy Beebe said, “When Danielle request and they are disappointed with bian and I am still straight!... Because I am the justices say during this week’s hear- met Samantha, my friends asked, ‘But straight I have access to rights, benefits and ings and no matter how they rule months the decision. Many people in the school’s what kind of a future do they have?’ I administration are also supportive of the privileges that my friends who are gay are from now, the final chapter of this story said, ‘They have the same future as any- denied… Same sex loving couples ARE has in fact been written. In an astonish- guys, but are caught between a rock and one else.’” a hard place when enforcing rules handed and they matter and are entitled to the ingly brief period of time, this country has She noted that her daughter has a bum- same rights as other Americans.” experienced a seismic shift in opinion -- a down to them, and how the religious poli- per sticker which reads, “Legalize gay mar- cies of the school are also an issue. KaeLyn Rich, director of the Roches- profound social and political revolution -- riage so we can be as miserable as everyone ter chapter of the NYCLU, said, “I’m to when it comes to LGBT people. “On the other hand, tuition is almost else.” $11,000, and the Catholic religion is a all intents and purposes same sex married “Scores of prominent Republicans, Tammy went on, “We’re one of those in Canada and New York, and hopefully including a few senior advisors to Mitt huge money maker, so should the people lucky families whose in-laws are as crazy as paying to go to this school be in the deci- across the country very, very soon. My Romney’s campaign, broke ranks in Feb- our family.” (The Beebes’ in-laws also took partner is a transgender man but according ruary and put their names to a Supreme sion making process. Also, at what point in kids rejected by their own families for should school rules move forward with to New York State and the federal govern- Court amicus brief in favor of marriage being gay.) “We have dozens of ‘children’ ment, we have the same gender markers equality. These folks have joined dozens of society, which is becoming way more open who call us Mom and Dad, and that’s the to homosexuality. and are technically a same sex couple…. It’s professional athletes, the American Acad- best gift God can give us.” ■ amazing to be a part of history and some- emy of Pediatrics, tech giants, accounting “One of the boys in the couple calls day we’ll say, ‘I was there.’ firms, retailers and airlines in so doing. in to tell us how disappointed he is in the “Yes, it’s about our rights, but it’s also “At the recent annual gathering of the decision, but does not blame the school, but rather the Jesuits above the local adminis- about Edie Windsor finally getting her Conservative Political Action Conference ( BFA continued from page 1) marriage recognized,” Rich continued. (CPAC), opponents to gay rights spoke to tration. As we said earlier, the boys feel sup- went to Common Grounds, the Ithaca gay ported and respected. He does bring up the “Her partner passed away and Edie had a nearly empty room while supporters had bar, that I decided I wanted to start getting to pay $360,000 in estate taxes, which a standing room only crowd. Republicans point that at Mercy a lesbian couple was involved with men. allowed to attend prom together. she would not have had to pay if she was need to get with the program or get comfy “I came out to myself in 1982, and in heterosexual. These rights affect us all as with their image of being woefully out of “Lots of calls in support of these guys, 1986 I met my partner. Actually I met and a couple that played devil’s advocate. someone at the Gay Alliance Picnic who Hopefully the decision is reversed, but to introduced me to other people, and even- quote Wease... ‘Wimmens Is Crazy, And tually I got set up for a blind date with the Rules Is Rules’.” person I am still with.” Read more: http://www.951thebrew. He also donates to AIDS Care, the com/pages/Random.html?article=110579 Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus and Ima- 29#ixzz2PzxN77Ki geOut. “I like to support the people who Support for the boys also appeared in are doing the outreach,” he says. social media, with a brief change.org peti- It’s our Forty & Fabulous Cam- tion and a twitter feed. paign! The petition garnered 828 support- Celebrate and congratulate Henry ers and several comments from alumni in Schroeder being the first member to meet favor of letting the youth attend. Shortly his goal of $4000! thereafter, school president Father Edward Individuals or organizations can join Salmon sent a detailed note to parents on the Fab 40 Team who together will create March 27, saying, “If our two brothers a thriving community for all of us, as we who have asked to attend the Junior Ball educate, advocate, incubate and celebrate wish to do so, they will be welcomed.” He a future that is truly inclusive of all our wrote that no decision had been made to fabulous gifts. refuse to allow the youth to attend the Visit our website (see icon at end of ball, and criticized those who he said had article) and check out who is leading this acted out of “the darkness of anger” in the campaign. Help your favorite Fab 40 lead- social media. ers to become successful by joining their Father Salmon did not return calls team, making a donation or choosing a from The Empty Closet requesting an year! interview. ■ y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 7 Interview Jim Bertolone Jim believes that there should be no special privileges for married heterosexual By Susan Jordan couples. He said, “I think there shouldn’t James Bertolone is president of the be all these special rights that come Rochester Labor Council, AFL-CIO. He with marriage. I quote Betty Freidan tell- is also president of the American Post- ing feminists that equality and freedom al Workers Union Local 215. And he shouldn’t be handed out to couples just has been a strong supporter of LGBT because they’re married. rights for many years, helping to persuade “I just think the rightwing courts the NYS AFL-CIO to endorse marriage we’ve seen for the last 30 years have equality. harmed marriage, first. Second, histori- Why be an ally? Jim Bertolone said, cally, working people didn’t get mar- “I’m one of those baby boomers that came ried. They had common-law marriages. out of the ‘60s, and I look at expanding Only within the last 150-200 years has civil rights in our country and the evolu- the church started pushing marriage (for tion of democracy in our society. Obvi- working class people). So that was my ously we have a long way to go!” issue – that people shouldn’t have to get He said that he has known gay people married in order to have rights.” J im Bertolone. Photo: Susan Jordan for four decades in the progressive and In spite of those views, Jim has worked labor movements, especially Tom Priv- for years to enable same sex couples to have itere, vice president of Pride at Work legal marriages. He said, “I’m on the NYS (PAW), the LGBT labor group organized Executive Council for the AFL-CIO – 2.5 Hopefully in a few years people will not be by the Empire State Pride Agenda. million members statewide. Seven or eight Jim said, “I knew the Priviteres grow- years ago the state AFL-CIO had not taken ing up in the city. I’ve known Tom for a position on the issue. I came out in the able to believe that gays didn’t always decades. We had arguments about mar- newspapers saying that politicians looking riage vs. civil unions; I was pro civil for labor endorsement should know that have equal rights. unions, but Tom convinced me that mar- this (marriage equality) is part of our agen- riage was the right step. da. It seems like other NYS labor leaders That’s where we should go “I met Bess Watts, president of PAW, were on the fence. I was told by PAW that through CSEA and the Labor Council, my statements broke the logjam and then as a society. and I’ve known her and her partner Anne the state AFL-CIO endorsed gay rights. I (Tischer). Also, a cousin of mine came out didn’t realize at the time that I was taking as a teenager. These were gay people who such a radical position!” were friends before Stonewall and all the Labor began to lobby elected officials endorsed marriage equality. whiskey much like the British tax on tea stuff that’s happened in the last decade on the issue – with the exception of Harry While he compares fanatical oppo- that set off the Revolution -- and now or two.” Bronson who didn’t need lobbying! Jim nents of gay rights and equal suffrage has been claimed by the Tea Party reac- Jim feels that when straight people said, “We lobbied candidates looking for to the Taliban, Jim does not think they tionaries (who perhaps should call them- realize that they know and respect some- endorsements and then after they were represent an American move toward the- selves the Whiskey Party). Jim said, “The one who is gay, their attitude toward elected too. So there was lobbying and ocracy rather than democracy. He said, second amendment was not meant to LGBT rights changes dramatically. He rallies and so on for half a dozen years “No, I see it more as the Koch broth- enable the people to rise up against their said, “We’re seeing a lot of Republicans before 2011. At their first annual ban- ers etc. using the social issues and the government.” like Cheney and Portman who have gay quet, PAW gave me their first award.” evangelicals to further their economic He went on, “There’s a huge histo- family and change their views.” The national AFL-CIO has also agenda.” ry of labor vs. religion. The opposition As a student of history, who majored to the idea of ‘the dignity of work and in that subject and political science in the right to join a union’ comes mostly college, Jim finds it interesting that from the South. The Klan historically the Right is obsessed with the second has hated unions even more than black amendment (the right to bear arms) and people or Jews.” ignores the 15th amendment (“The right Jim continued, “Another issue that of citizens of the United States to vote seems to get lost is that youth have pro- shall not be denied or abridged by any gressed further on (gay rights) than state on account of race, color or previous adults. We have to think how hard it is condition of servitude”) in their drive to for children to come out at the age when reverse the Voting Rights Act. acceptance by their peers is so important. He says that James Madison’s origi- We should build a culture where gay kids nal language for the second amendment won’t be afraid to come out. We focus on referred to a “well-regulated militia” to adult rights, but we need to make sure defend a “free nation.” This was changed kids can grow up to be adults.” to “a free state” due to lobbying by Madi- Jim summed up, “I’m very hopeful son’s fellow slave owners, so each of the and encouraged by what I’ve seen in the original 13 states’ militias could enforce last 10 years. To the next generation, this slavery. The militias would check a plan- (marriage equality) will look like ancient tation’s slave quarters for runaways, con- history. My kids found it incredible when traband, weapons, etc. A “free” state for I told them about race relations and the whom? civil rights advances in the ‘50s and ‘60s. Jim noted that George Washington Hopefully in a few years people will not put down the Whiskey Rebellion, when be able to believe that gays didn’t always armed mobs rose up against the new U.S. have equal rights. That’s where we should government, unwilling to pay a tax on go as a society.” ■

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PoetrynLove (Maisha B.) In background: Poet Marie Starr. photos by Jason Ackerman.

EROTIC NIGHT: Diane Conway presented the first Erotic Night of 2013 on March 30 at Equal Grounds. Above: Musician Denise Reese gets ready to perform. Photos: Jill Frier

Steph Poetic Stuff. Poet Christopher Coles. Artist Allison Snyder-Nichols.

M y Own Private Rochester: Ramona Santorelli town United Presbyteri- an Church. It is a lesbian league but accepts straight women – and you do have to have some skills. “We play pick-up competitive- ly,” she says. The League is Ramo- na’s favorite Rochester group. She is a member of the congregation at Spiri- tus Christi and calls the church “probably my most important affiliation. It not only is an inclusive church, but it embraces and tries to help the poor locally,” she said. “The first time I attended mass I cried like a baby. It had distilled all the ways I wanted the church to be.” She considers herself “a recovering Catholic.” Ramona’s favorite res- Ramona and Gail Neisner as brides at the first Roch- Ramona and Happy at Mendon Ponds. Photo: Susan Jordan taurants are Sea, an Asian ester Pride Parade in 1989. restaurant on Monroe By Susan Jordan ful, indecent bodies.) ing them off in the hot Ave., and India House on Abilene’s, the former Tara, ly she has organized the New York women have That would be a story weather,” she jokes. South Ave., to which she and catches movies at The Moe Town (for Ra-moe- a legal right to remove in itself, but it is only one Ramona was a Speak- was introduced by an ex. Cinema or The Little. She na) music parties at the their tops when sunbath- accomplishment Ramona ers Bureau volunteer for (“Why do we call them swims every day in the Tay House in Cobbs Hill ing on a hot summer day. has to her credit. She was the Gay Alliance in the Xs?” she jokes. “Why not winter at the YWCA and Park, with a goal of bring- That wasn’t always the an early gay rights advo- ‘80s and ‘90s, and for 20 ‘Ys’ as in ‘Y did I ever get in the summer at Mendon ing women of all races case – while men could cate -- see the photo of her years she facilitated the involved with this per- Ponds, one of her favorite together. Unfortunately, sunbathe to their hearts’ and a friend as “brides” domestic violence pro- son?’”) She is adamant places. While she swims, the city has increased the content, women risked in the very first Roches- gram for men who batter that Pizza Stop on State Happy fishes. Her favorite price for Tay House to arrest for “indecent expo- ter Pride Parade in 1989, women at Genesee Hos- St. has the best pizza in local band is Tegan and the point where, Ramona sure.” which Ramona helped to pital. She also worked at Rochester. “It’s the best the Tweeds – “I’m a Tegan says, only wealthy people All that changed in organize until 1992. In Alternatives for Battered pizza in the city by far. and the Tweeds groupie,” can afford it. 1992, thanks to Roches- 1990 she was dressed in Women in the children’s I’m from New York so I she laughs. Ramona walks Happy, ter’s Ramona Santorelli, Victorian garb and pro- program in the ‘80s. know!” Ramona’s endless ener- and other dogs belonging fearless feminist. From claimed “the Gay ‘90s” Today Ramona lives in Born in Brooklyn and gy makes her an ideal to her friends, in the city 1985, when she was told and in 1991 she was the South Wedge with her raised there and on Long event organizer. She has parks, especially Cobbs to put her shirt back on “Homocoming Queen.” dog Happy and two cats, Island, Ramona came produced benefits like the Hill, Highland, Ellison while the man next to her Although she is no Philly and Sunny. She to Rochester in order to Lesbian Fashion Variety and Corbett’s Glen. She sunbathed without a shirt, longer a Pride organizer, works with autistic adults play basketball at St. John Show (to benefit the now- says, “One thing I love until 1992 when the NYS Ramona is still someone as a job coach and just got Fisher. She was also drawn defunct New Women’s about Rochester is the Court of Appeals ruled to watch out for during a volunteer award from St. to Rochester’s tradition of Times and raise aware- parks. There are so many in her favor, Ramona led the Pride Parade, when John Meadows. Since 1998 activism, especially Susan ness of hunger local- and I take advantage of the “Topfree” movement she likes to spray marchers she has run the Women’s B. Anthony and the suf- ly and globally) and them because I walk the (top-less implied that with her water gun. “I like Basketball League, which frage movement. Amazon Utopia, a vari- dog every day. I also like women were “less” with- to say I’m blessing people plays Wednesday nights On weekends Ramona ety show at the original to ride my bike to Genesee out covering their shame- with holy water and cool- from 7-9 p.m. at Down- likes to hear some music at Jazzberry’s. More recent- Park.” ■ y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 11

BREAKING THE SILENCE: GLSEN’s Day of Silence event to break the silence on ZACH WAHLS: National activist and Eagle Scout Zach Wahls, who has two moms, was the youth hate violence and bullying took place April 19 at Tilt. 210 youth from 41 schools big draw at RIT’s N.E. LGBT college conference on April 12. Above: he relaxes the next day attended. Photos: Jeff Mills with a drink at the RIT Inn. He also spoke at Brockport on April 17. Photo: Khoury Humphrey 12 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

P hilly archdiocese diocese addresses seven more outstand- ums, and community service. A parent national ing cases. says the only event his son misses from the and international finally discharges The remaining seven administrative Boy Scouts is the Pinewood Derby, where abusive priests; victim leave cases are not being announced yet scouts build and race model cars (the par- for a variety of reasons. The Archdio- ent points out that “as a parent doing Report committed suicide ( from page 5) cese referred all of its cases to the local much of the work on it, I do not miss it.”) Washington, and the District of Colum- On April 7 the Archdiocese of Phil- district attorney. Four cases have not yet But there is one big difference: The bia had support for same-sex marriage at adelphia permanently discharged three been released by law enforcement so the Navigators’ Moral Compass, which or above 50 percent. priests accused in a 2011 molestation internal Archdiocesan investigation can- expresses the group’s philosophy that Of these 12 states, all currently per- scandal. not begin yet. Three cases were released members shouldn’t be discriminated form marriages, civil unions, or domestic The Revs. Joseph Gallagher and Mark by law enforcement over the past several against over gender, religious beliefs, or partnerships for same-sex couples. Gaspar were suspended following a scath- months. Those cases are either currently sexual orientation. The organization has Alaska, Arizona, Delaware, Illinois, ing 2011 grand jury report that ultimate- under investigation, awaiting examination openly gay chapter leaders, as well as Iowa, Maryland, Montana, Nevada, New ly led to the landmark conviction of a by the Professional Responsibility Review board leaders and co-members. Hampshire, New Mexico, Pennsylvania, high-ranking archdiocese official on child Board or a final decision by Archbishop As for other inclusive alternatives to and South Dakota are currently within endangerment charges. Two other priests Chaput. In one additional case a priest on the BSA, there are also the Baden-Powell five percentage points of majority support. and a Catholic school teacher were also administrative leave was arrested. Service Association (BPSA), and Camp In the last eight years, every state has convicted. The three priests fired can appeal their Fire. increased in its support for marriage for The February 2011 grand jury report terminations to the Vatican. same-sex couples with an average increase prominently named Gallagher as a priest RELATED: In February of this year V ideo features DOMA’s of 13.6 percent. who remained in ministry despite appar- Philadelphia Archbishop Charles Chaput If present public opinion trends con- ently credible allegations of abuse. The announced that he would be organizing discriminatory effect on tinue, another eight states will be above grand jury said the archdiocese had found buses of anti-gay protesters to send to Marine, partner 50 percent support by the end of 2014. the allegation against him unsubstanti- NOM’s hate march at the Supreme Court Recently, support for same-sex marriage ated despite the accuser’s “obvious cred- the week of March 26. Because gay par- Freedom to Marry and OutServe- has increased at a rapid pace. Since 2009, ibility.” ents abuse children, you know. -JoeMy- SLDN released the newest video in their legislative majorities in six states – Maine, “Our only problem is that it took so God.com, joint “Freedom to Serve, Freedom to Maryland, New York, New Hampshire, long,” Marci Hamilton, the attorney for Marry” campaign featuring gay U.S. Vermont and Washington – have passed the family of Daniel Neill, said Sunday. Marine Corps Captain Matthew Phelps laws introducing same-sex marriage and, Neill committed suicide in 2009, less G ay-friendly alternative and his soon-to-be husband Ben Schock. over that same time period, legislatures in than a year after being told his allegation to Boy Scouts doubles Captain Phelps and Schock previously five additional states – Delaware, Hawaii, couldn’t be substantiated. numbers in past year made news when they became the first- Illinois, Nevada, and Rhode Island – intro- Father Richard Powers, the third priest ever same-sex couple to get engaged duced civil unions or domestic partner- fired, was suspended last year after being The gay-friendly scouting alternative through a marriage proposal at the White ships for same-sex couples. named on a list of abusive priests. From to the Boy Scouts, called Navigators USA, House. However, despite increasing levels of the official statement by the Archdiocese: has doubled its numbers in one year, “There seems to be a contradiction support for same-sex marriage across the “Archbishop Charles J. Chaput, Mother Jones reports: between serving my country and my country, a notable disparity still exists O.F.M. Cap. has found Monsignor Rich- In March, 2012, the Navigators had country not fully supporting my rela- across state boundaries. Research revealed ard T. Powers, a retired priest of the 19 chapters, but today, there are about tionship with Ben,” says Captain Phelps a 31 percent difference between the lowest Archdiocese of Philadelphia, not suit- 45 chapters across 21 states, according to in the video. “Every day, I’m reminded level of support found in a state and the able for ministry following a substanti- Tony Porterfield, a chapter leader in Los that my marriage to Ben is different from highest. These marked differences have ated allegation of sexual abuse of a minor Altos. They are growing at a rate of about everybody else’s marriage, and it’s just important consequences for predicting that occurred approximately 40 years ago two chapters per month, with each chap- not right.” The full video can be viewed the outcome of future legislative activities outside the Archdiocese of Philadelphia. ter having an average of 8-12 children, so here: http://youtu.be/yhHgVg65bJE and statewide initiatives around the issue. The announcement regarding Monsi- there are up to 600 boys and girls enrolled Captain Phelps will marry Schock in For the full study, please visit http:// gnor Powers is not directly connected to in the program. May in Seattle, Washington and he will williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/research/ the cases of priests placed on administra- For the most part, Navigators partici- subsequently be transferred to Japan this marriage-and-couples-rights/public-sup- tive leave following the February 2011 pate in the same kinds of activities that summer for a minimum of two years. But port-for-marriage-for-same-sex-couples- Grand Jury Report.” Boy Scouts do: Camping, organic farm- because of the so-called Defense of Mar- by-state/ In a separate statement, the Arch- ing, hiking, tie dying, excursions to muse- riage Act (DOMA), Schock will not be y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 13 allowed to join him on base. Even though and examples decision-makers here in IBM, Microsoft, Nike, and dozens more macki, this picture was taken “probably they will be legally married, Schock must the United States, including our Supreme support ending the taxation of health one second after the explosion.” He writes: leave the country every 90 days at his and Court justices, should swiftly follow to get benefits, and endorse the Tax Parity for [The runner] was blown over by the his husband’s own expense, just to reenter the U.S. where it needs to be.” Health Plan Beneficiaries Act. blast and fell on the ground. The cops are again. The military does not provide the When marriages between same-sex “In today’s economy it is more impor- just reacting as cops. They didn’t know same housing, allowance, and assistance couples begin this summer, Uruguay will tant than ever that we are able to attract what was going on. They’re pulling their for married same-sex couples as it does for join 13 countries that have the freedom to the best and brightest. Domestic partner guns out, looking left and right. They opposite-sex married couples, which will marry for same-sex couples nationwide: benefits play a large role in our ability to were pretty close to where the explosion make it more difficult for Schock to find The Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Can- recruit and retain top talent. This legis- went off and could have been killed or a job and for them both to support one ada, South Africa, Norway, Sweden, Por- lation would end the discriminatory tax injured also.” another financially. tugal, Iceland, Argentina, New Zealand, burden our employees and their fami- Pandemonium reigned in that split “As Captain Phelps prepares to put his France and Denmark. Three others have lies face when we offer these important second, but Tlumacki reports that the life on the line every day for his country, taken judicial and regional steps to allow benefits to them,” said Howard Unger- police almost immediately switched into his government has yet to ensure that his same-sex couples to share in the freedom leider, Executive Vice President, Advanced crisis mode, clearing the area and try- marriage will be given the same respect to marry in parts of the country: Brazil, Materials, for the Dow Chemical Compa- ing to maintain some semblance of order and dignity that his colleagues receive,” Mexico, and the United States. ny and executive sponsor of Dow’s GLAD amidst the chaos. (His account is incred- said Evan Wolfson, founder and president (Gays, Lesbians and Allies at Dow) Diver- ibly compelling and worth reading in its of Freedom to Marry. “Captain Phelps has B ill would end tax on sity Network. entirety.) made a commitment in life and will be “We believe a diverse and inclusive In addition to being one of the heroes legally married, but his husband will be domestic partners’ workforce is one of our greatest strengths of the Boston Marathon bombings, Pagan treated as a stranger in the eyes of the fed- health insurance and a key measure of the wealth of our is a hero to the LGBT community: his eral government. It’s time to end the dis- company,” said Karen Elinski, Senior Vice position makes him the most highly vis- crimination of military families like theirs The Human Rights Campaign on President and Head of Government Rela- ible LGBT member of the Boston Police and repeal DOMA.” April 15 lauded Senators Charles Schum- tions at TIAA-CREF. “Central to that force, he’s a member of the Gay Officer’s “As much as military leaders at all lev- er (D-NY) and Susan Collins (R-ME) commitment is providing health care ben- Action League, and he had the honor els may wish to treat the troops under their for introducing the Tax Parity for Health efits that include our employees’ diverse of escorting LGBT civil rights attorney command with equity, they are forced by Plan Beneficiaries Act in the United States families. We are proud to support the Tax Mary Bonauto to a celebration at City federal law to discriminate,” said Ally- Senate. Parity for Health Plan Beneficiaries Act Hall plaza on the day same-sex marriages son D. Robinson, Executive Director of The bill, which was also introduced in and salute Senator Chuck Schumer, our became legal in Massachusetts. OutServe-SLDN. “As a result, gay and the 112th Congress, would end the unfair home state senator, and Sen. Susan Col- And Pagan isn’t the only hero in his lesbian service members are denied access taxation of employer-provided health lins for their leadership.” family: Pedro, his husband of four years, to critical benefits and meaningful sup- insurance for domestic partners, as well To see a full listing of businesses is a retired sergeant from the New York port programs the services provides to as the penalty imposed on fair-minded which have publicly stated their support Police Department who served on 9/11 help families face the unique challenges employers who provide equal benefits to for this legislation, go to: http://www.hrc. and helped rescue people from the rubble of military life. This denial weakens the their LGBT employees. On average an org/resources/entry/business-coalition- after the Twin Towers collapsed. force itself.” LGBT employee will pay $1,069 a year in for-benefits-tax-equity-members. Javier and Pedro are amazing examples federal taxes for employer provided spou- of bravery and heroism -- not just for the U ruguay is fourth Latin sal health care, according to the Williams LGBT community, but for all people. Institute at UCLA. JoeMyGod.com American nation to pass The Tax Parity for Health Plan Bene- marriage equality ficiaries Act addresses a fundamental flaw in the U.S. tax code. Currently, employ- H ouston trans student The Uruguayan Senate passed free- ees are taxed on the fair market value may wear dress to prom dom to marry legislation on April 3 allow- of employer-provided health coverage for ing same-sex couples to marry legally, and same-sex domestic partners or spouses. Tony Zamazal, a trans student at making Uruguay the 17th nation in the The same employer-provided health cov- Spring High School in Houston, will world – and the fourth in Latin America erage for opposite-sex spouses is excluded be allowed to wear a dress to prom – where gay and lesbian couples can share from the employee’s gross income and no after the national and Texas ACLU got in the freedom to marry. taxes are paid. involved following reports in February The bill had been modified slightly While a growing number of fair-mind- that Zamazal’s request was denied, the since passage by the Chamber of Depu- ed companies “gross up,” or pay LGBT ACLU reports: ties in December, but those changes are employees with dependent partners more “Like every other student, Tony expected to be easily approved. to offset the tax burden, most do not. deserves to feel comfortable and be herself The Uruguay Senate approved the bill Employees who elect to cover domes- at prom,” said Amanda Goad, staff attor- by a vote of 23-8. The bill now returns to tic partner or same-sex spouse pay more ney with the ACLU Lesbian Gay Bisexu- the nation’s lower legislative chamber to income and payroll tax and employers al and Transgender Project. “We’re glad reconcile a minor change. President Jose who offer benefits to domestic partners H eroic Boston police that Spring ISD has affirmed Tony’s First Amendment rights.” Mujica has promised to sign the bill and face the administrative burden of calcu- officer is LGBT liaison marriages should commence within a few lating taxes separately, and they also pay The ACLU sent a letter to the principal months. additional payroll taxes. This photograph, by John Tlumacki on March 18, explaining that both fed- Evan Wolfson, president and founder “Health insurance is critical to the of the Boston Globe, taken immediately eral law and the U.S. Constitution protect of Freedom to Marry, said, “Freedom to stability of any family and gay and les- after the first explosion in April 16’s hor- Zamazal’s right to wear a dress to prom. Marry applauds the people of Uruguay bian couples shouldn’t be unfairly taxed,” rifying Boston Marathon bombings, has The school district responded and affirmed and their government for moving forward said HRC President Chad Griffin. “In emerged as one of the iconic images of the that it will allow Zamazal to attend the into a future in which all loving and com- removing a discriminatory tax burden, day. And like all iconic images, it contains prom in the formal clothing of her choice. mitted couples can share in the freedom this legislation will make families stron- a number of compelling stories. “Tony has the right under both fed- to marry and the meaning and protec- ger and will end the penalty imposed on The Dallas Voice has uncovered one eral statutes and the U.S. Constitution tions marriage brings to families. Uru- fair-minded employers who provide equal such story, about the police officer on to express her gender identity,” said Adri- guay’s vote today to move past civil union benefits to their LGBT employees.” the far right. His name is Javier Pagan, ana Pinon, senior staff attorney with the to marriage itself, Argentina’s enactment The number of major companies and he’s the Boston Police Department’s ACLU of Texas. “Students’ legal rights of the freedom to marry in 2010 and the providing family benefits for domestic liaison to the LGBT community. Bos- aren’t something that public schools get Mexico Supreme Court’s unanimous rul- partners continues to rise. Currently, six- ton Pride, which lists Pagan as a “good to put up to a vote. We’re happy to see the ing last month in favor of the freedom to ty-two percent of Fortune 500 companies friend,” says that he happened to be stand- school do the right thing.” marry -- citing the U.S Supreme Court offer these benefits as a matter of funda- ing right behind the flags where the first Read more: http://www.towleroad. cases of Brown v. Board of Education and mental fairness. That is why a coalition of bomb went off. com/#ixzz2PatTLIrL Loving v. Virginia -- all are inspirations top employers like Dow, Corning, Chubb, According to photographer John Tlu- ( Newsfronts continue page 14) 14 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

elected with the backing of the Tea Party. David Kato. the officer answered, “Yes, it is possible.” national In 2011 Seabaugh introduced an amend- Kato’s mother was reportedly inside The local police department attended and international ment which gutted a proposed anti-bul- the family home and saw the entire rally. and, according to reports, endorsed the lying bill. Pastor Male was joined onstage by two rally. people who claim they are “ex-gay,” both The organizers also praised Uganda’s Newsfronts ( from page 13) F our males attack of whom said they were “recruited” into Red Pepper tabloid for its ongoing cov- homosexuality by bribes and nonconsen- erage dedicated to outing LGBTI people GOP state rep: anti- 17-year-old Calgary sual sodomy, according to a report pro- in Uganda, often along with personal discrimination lawsuits lesbian in hate crime vided to The Advocate by LGBTI activists information, including home addresses Pepe Onziema and Jeffrey Ogwaro. The and phone numbers. Shortly before activ- are “frivolous” An attack on a 17-year-old lesbian in religious leaders also claimed that gay ist Kato was found murdered, another Calgary, Canada is being investigated as a In early April Louisiana GOP state people force young men into homosexu- tabloid called Rolling Stone (no relation hate crime, CTV reports: ality at gunpoint, when they aren’t brib- to the U.S. magazine of the same name) Rep. Alan Seabaugh filed a bill that would The 17-year-old lesbian was jumped effectively ban employment discrimina- ing them with gifts and promises of an published Kato’s picture on its front page late Thursday night (April 14), shortly education. tion lawsuits filed on the basis of sexual announcing “Uganda’s Top 100 Homos,” after getting off a transit bus near her When Pastor Male took the stage, he under a banner reading “Hang Them.” orientation. home. hurled a rapid-fire stream of homopho- The so-called Kill the Gays Bill con- Equality Louisiana writes on their The victim says a group of four teen- bic rhetoric at the crowd. Male claimed tinues to linger in the Ugandan parlia- website: agers attacked her, punching and kicking that Paul Kagaba, one of the “ex-gays” ment and has widespread support among HB 402 by Rep. Alan Seabaugh her several times, while using homopho- in attendance, had been recruited into members. But according to an article from (R-Shreveport) would require that any bic slurs. homosexuality by Kato, delving into a Uganda’s Observer, MPs are hoping for a employment discrimination lawsuits filed She says one of the attackers recorded graphic description alleging that the mur- private, closed vote on the bill, to shield for reasons other than a very short list the beating on his phone. dered activist sodomized Kagaba until his themselves from being “blacklisted,” as of protected categories be automatical- “(I’m) pretty shaken up, it’s hard not rectum tore and infected Kagaba with the bill’s author, MP David Bahati, claims ly dismissed and considered “frivolous.” to be scared,” says the victim. “This is my HIV. he has been, due to international outrage Currently, Louisiana law doesn’t explic- neighborhood and I’ve always felt safe in Male went on to explain the deliberate at the Anti-Homosexuality Bill. itly protect people against discrimination it and now I don’t. I’ve had people throw choice to launch his hate-filled campaign But while antigay sentiment is strong based on their sexual orientation, gender things at me and play ‘pick on the lesbian on the doorstep of Kato, who was blud- in Uganda, LGBTI activists there contend identity, or gender expression. If HB 402 on the bus’, and put gum in my hair but geoned to death inside his Kampala home it is not ubiquitous. becomes law, courts would have grounds nobody has physically assaulted me until in 2011. Police ruled the murder the result “Homophobia is the real import to to dismiss discrimination cases that they now.” of a robbery, ignoring calls to investigate Uganda,” said Onziema, a transgender decide are based on sexual orientation or The victim says she has a black eye Kato’s death as a hate crime. man and program director for LGBT gender identity – which current law does swollen so tight she can hardly open it, a Pastor Male said he launched the anti- advocacy group Sexual Minorities Ugan- not protect – and makes workers pay dam- split lip, and her mouth and forehead are gay campaign in Kato’s hometown “to da (SMUG). Onziema is an outspoken ages and court costs to their employers, cut open. make sure Namataba Village was not activist in a nation where simply acknowl- adding more financial burden to victims Read more: http://www.towleroad. turned into a pilgrimage site for homo- edging one’s homosexuality could bring a of workplace discrimination. com/#ixzz2QYyosiak sexuality because Kato was buried there,” death sentence, and in 2012 he received Independent Media Group reports on according to Ogwaro, of Uganda’s Civil the Clinton Global Initiative Award for their blog that Seabaugh’s bill would U gandan haters rally Society Coalition on Human Rights and his work. (Richard Lusimbo of SMUG supersede any local anti-discrimination Constitutional Law, who covertly attend- was interviewed in the April issue of The ordinances. Here’s the text of HB 402: at slain gay activist’s ed the rally and shared a report with The Empty Closet.) Provides that suits filed for employ- grave; mother is witness Advocate. To help change the hearts and minds ment discrimination for any reason other Pastor Male promised the crowd that of his fellow Ugandans, Onziema has than age, disability, race, color, religion, On Easter Sunday, antigay religious the “Say No to Homosexuality” campaign teamed up with American videographer sex, national origin, pregnancy, childbirth leaders in Uganda held a rally to launch was stepping off in Namataba Village but Tim McCarthy to produce a documenta- and related medical conditions, sickle cell the “Say No to Homosexuality” cam- would continue throughout the country. ry about Ugandan LGBT life to be shown trait, and genetic discrimination shall be paign, led by Pastor Solomon Male and During a question-and-answer session, primarily to other Ugandans. The project dismissed and considered frivolous. the Reverend Thomas Musoke. The rally one rally attendee asked a police officer if uses the Lugandan equivalent of the Eng- According to his Wikipedia profile, was held in Namataba Village, just out- police dogs could be trained to sniff out lish word “queer” to raise the Voices of the Seabaugh was the first Louisiana state rep side the gravesite of slain gay activist homosexuality. Responding in Lugandan, ( Ugandan continues page 16) y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 15 Opinion P aulk renounces honest, Truth Wins Out believes much curiously attractive gay men. John and more needs to be done. According to Anne didn’t really disappear from the “ex- “ex-gay” movement Truth Wins Out Executive Director gay” scene, though. John spoke in 2010 Burlington, Vt. - Truth Wins Out Wayne Besen, “It is not enough to simply at the Evergreen “ex-gay” conference, and commends former “ex-gay” poster-boy send an e-mail that says, ‘I’m sorry.’ John in 2012, Anne was a co-founder of the John Paulk for taking an important first Paulk must work to atone for the damage Restored Hope Network, a group of “ex- step in being honest about who he is, but he has done to LGBT families by taking gay” ministries that defected from Exodus stated that Paulk must do much more to a public role in renouncing and working International when Alan Chambers began make up for the damage he, his estranged against the harmful ‘ex-gay’ industry by to tell the truth, that reparative therapy wife and the Religious Right have done embarking on a speaking tour to show and “ex-gay” ministries do not change to the LGBT community over the last that he truly has changed. Further, he anyone’s sexuality. twenty years. should advocate for a bill in Oregon that Indeed, Anne seemed to double down J ohn Paulk In a piece in PQ Monthly, Paulk, who would ban so-called ‘reparative therapy’ on the lie at the group’s inaugural meet- has perhaps done more to hurt LGBT for minors. Only then can he start to ing. “I never thought I would be married on the Religious Right have had ample families than any other single person in repair the damage he has done to count- and the mother of three sons,” she told the opportunity to remove the Paulks from the “ex-gay” industry, states for the record less LGBT people and their families.” eager crowd mixed with anti-gay extrem- their literature and to stop using them as that he no longer endorses efforts to John Paulk was at one time the most ists and the hurting parents of gay chil- poster children for the lie that “ex-gay” change people’s sexuality: well known and influential person in the dren. Anne Paulk continues to propagate programs work. While John expressed in “Until recently, I have struggled all “ex-gay” industry, appearing on the cover a false narrative of her own “ex-gay” life the recent investigation that he no longer my life in feeling unloved and unaccept- of Newsweek with his wife Anne in 1998 in order to stay in the spotlight and make wanted to be associated with his “ex-gay” ed,” Paulk said. “I have been on a jour- under the headline “Gay For Life?” He money off of suffering LGBT people and past, he was unwilling to publicly cor- ney during the last few years in trying to was instrumental in forming the Love their families. rect the record, and his estranged wife understand God, myself, and how I can Won Out “ex-gay” roadshow, which sub- During this same time period, Truth has continued to peddle their false story best relate to others. During this journey jected countless LGBT youth and their Wins Out had been receiving reports that to any “ex-gay” charlatans who will listen. I have made many mistakes and I have families to misinformation, indoctrina- John and Anne Paulk had split up, and In light of John Paulk’s announce- hurt many people including people who tion and lies, and which destroyed many that John was living as an out gay man in ment, Truth Wins Out also calls upon are close to me. I have also found a large families in the process. Portland, frequenting gay bars and prop- Anne Paulk and the rest of the Reli- number of people who accept me for who In 2000, Wayne Besen, founder of ositioning men for sex. In 2012, Truth gious Right to immediately cease using I am regardless of my past, any labels, or Truth Wins Out, photographed John Wins Out attempted to give Paulk an the Paulks’ story to sell harmful “ex- what I do.” Paulk coming out of a Washington, DC, opportunity to set the record straight and gay” therapy to vulnerable people. “Anne Paulk continued, “I no longer support gay bar, and the lies began to unravel. come out with dignity, instead of continu- Paulk and her Religious Right cohort the ex-gay movement or efforts to attempt Though John resigned from the board of ing the lie that his family was an “ex-gay” must immediately cease lying to people to change individuals - especially teens Exodus International following this inci- success story, a narrative that the Reli- about the false ‘ex-gay Paulk fairy-tale,’” who already feel insecure and alienated. dent, the Religious Right continued to gious Right uses to this day. When that said Truth Wins Out Associate Director I feel great sorrow over the pain that has use the Paulks’ story as evidence that the offer was ultimately refused, Truth Wins Evan Hurst. “Indeed, both Paulks should been caused when my words were miscon- “ex-gay” life was a fairy tale rather than Out released the results of an investiga- become poster children for the very real strued. I have worked at giving generously a nightmare, and many LGBT people tion that showed that ongoing narrative nightmare that has been the ‘ex-gay’ expe- to the gay community in Portland where and their families have been damaged or of “ex-gay” healing in the Paulk family rience for so many LGBT people.” I work and live. I am working hard to be destroyed over the years as a result. was fraudulent, as John had been pursu- Truth Wins Out is a nonprofit organi- authentic and genuine in all of my rela- John and his wife moved to Portland, ing relationships with men who worked zation that fights anti-LGBT extremism. tionships.” Oregon, shortly thereafter and lived rela- for him, buying them things and asking TWO specializes in turning information While John Paulk is to be commend- tively quiet lives as John built a catering them for sexual favors. into action by organizing, advocating and ed, after so many years, for finally being company called Mezzaluna, staffed by Focus On The Family and others fighting for LGBT equality. ■ 16 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

vote for UAFA during the amendment House to implement the National HIV/ 60 students in professional health pro- national and process. AIDS Strategy. This resolution is ground- grams through a clinical rotation hosted international “We will not give Senators of either breaking in nature, as it is the first time at Lyon-Martin Health Services and pro- party a pass on the inclusion of our fami- PACHA has issued a transgender-specific vided administrative, cultural, and clinical (U gandan continued from page 14) lies in immigration reform. We are watch- set of recommendations. training to more than 25 community clin- Abasiyazzi, as the film is titled. The pair ing – and we will remember – which “We’re incredibly grateful to PACHA ics and hospitals. have launched a Kickstarter campaign to lawmakers stand with us, and which stand for passing such a strong and compelling In September, Project HEALTH make the documentary a reality and are to the side, when this critical vote hap- resolution,” said Cecilia Chung, Senior launched TRANSLINE, an online con- hoping to raise around $75,000. pens. The Judiciary Committee includes Strategist. “These recommendations, if sultation service for healthcare profession- Senators from states with full marriage implemented, will meet some of the dire als seeking help caring for transgender equality, such as New York, Vermont, needs of our community, which include patients. The team of leading organiza- M arriage equality Connecticut and Iowa. Other states rep- data collection, education, and cultur- tions and practitioners has responded to becomes legal in France resented on the Committee – California, ally competent prevention and care for more than 70 requests since September, Texas and Arizona – are home to large transgender people, as our community with a 100 percent satisfaction rating. The French National Assembly has numbers of LGBT binational families. continues to face extreme violence and Transgender Law Center works to made a final vote approving marriage Twenty six LGBT rights groups signed discrimination which contribute to a high change law, policy, and attitudes so that equality in a 331-225 vote. a statement of solidarity on the legisla- prevalence of HIV/AIDS.” all people can live safely, authentically, and The vote went down April 23, shortly tion including the National Gay and Les- Some of PACHA’s 15 recommenda- free from discrimination regardless of their after a protest in the gallery. The Speaker bian Task Force; GLAAD; the National tions include: gender identity or expression. http://www. ordered, “Get these enemies of democracy Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR); the Relevant Health and Human Services transgenderlawcenter.org To learn more outside parliament!” Queer Undocumented Immigrant Proj- (HHS) operating divisions should dedicate contact Mark Snyder, mark@transgender- There have been numerous violent pro- ect (QUIP), a project of the United We grant funds to projects specifically focus- lawcenter.org, 415.865.0176 ext. 310. tests against the new law by the Catholic Dream Network; National Queer Asian ing on transgender health, particularly in Medicare coverage of sex reassign- church and anti-gay activists, including Pacific Islander Alliance (NQAPIA); and the context of HIV prevention and treat- ment surgery: reconsidered gay-bashings, bar burnings, a child used Immigration Equality. ment… Medicare, beginning March 28 and for as a human shield and death threats to the “The current broken system hurts, The Indian Health Service (IHS) a 30 day period, invited comments from families of liberal lawmakers. The U.S. scapegoats and vilifies all immigrants, should develop a health services protocol the public regarding reconsideration of its hate group NOM has praised what it calls including LGBT immigrants, and their specific to providing culturally and clini- current policy to deny coverage of sexu- the “peaceful” anti-gay protests in France. friends and families. Comprehensive feder- cally appropriate care for male and female al reassignment surgery. This gave trans France joins New Zealand, Uruguay, al immigration reform is an urgent priority bodied, Two-Spirit individuals, including people a chance to have their voices heard. The Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Cana- for our nation and the LGBT communi- HIV prevention, education, outreach, and CMS opened this reconsideration of da, South Africa, Norway, Sweden, Portu- ty,” said Kate Kendell, executive director treatment; the NCD on Surgical Treatment for Gen- gal, Iceland, Argentina, and Denmark as of the National Center for Lesbian Rights. And The Centers for Medicaid and der Identity Disorder, Section 140.3 of the the 14th nation to offer its citizens nation- Said President Obama in a statement: Medicare Services (CMS) should require NCD Manual and considered all public wide marriage equality. “This afternoon, Senators Schumer facilities and providers receiving any feder- comments. Brazil, Mexico, and of course the U.S. and McCain briefed me on the bipartisan al funding to undertake regular staff train- Surgical Treatment for Gender Identity offer it in parts of the country. immigration reform bill that they have ings on transgender cultural competency. Disorder (formerly referred to as transsex- Read more: http://www.towleroad. drafted with their colleagues in the Sen- The report “Injustice at Every Turn” is ual surgery in 140.3) is currently non-cov- com/#ixzz2RIgg0zAr ate. This bill is clearly a compromise, and one of the few studies that has some data ered under the Medicare Part A and Part no one will get everything they wanted, about transgender HIV rates. According B programs. The existing policy, which I mmigration bill excludes including me. But it is largely consistent to the report, the HIV sero-prevelance became effective in 1981, states that trans- LGBT families with the principles that I have repeatedly among transgender women in the U.S. is sexual surgery is considered experimental. laid out for comprehensive reform. This more than seven times the national aver- LGBT rights groups expressed disap- bill would continue to strengthen secu- age. The PACHA resolution notes that SCOTUS ruling may harm pointment on April 16 when they learned rity at our borders and hold employers there is a lack of adequate data about that gay and lesbian families were left out more accountable if they knowingly hire transgender HIV risk and infection rates Ugandan lawsuit of a long-anticipated comprehensive immi- undocumented workers. It would provide and recommends ways to collect it. It also The Supreme Court has ruled in a gration reform bill. a pathway to earned citizenship for the points out that transgender people are pro- case that may set a precedent regard- “We’re disappointed that we’re not 11 million individuals who are already tected from discrimination in the Afford- ing the crimes against humanity law- in the base but we’ve always known that in this country illegally. I urge the Sen- able Care Act and lists ways to ensure suit brought by Ugandan LGBT activists our best shot would be at the committee ate to quickly move this bill forward and, agencies are aware of this and have ade- against American hate group leader, Scott level,” said Fred Sainz, spokesman for the as I told Senators Schumer and McCain, quate funding in place to care for trans- Lively. Human Rights Campaign. “The goal is to I stand willing to do whatever it takes to gender people. The US Supreme Court ruled unani- get into the underlying bill. How that hap- make sure that comprehensive immigra- Transgender Law Center works to edu- mously April 17 in Kiobel v. Royal Dutch pens is not as important as the fact that it tion reform becomes a reality as soon as cate legislators, policymakers, and advo- Petroleum that nothing in the Alien Tort happens.” possible.” cates about the importance of addressing Statute of 1789 rebuts the US presump- Immigration Equality writes: Read more: http://www.towleroad. the HIV/AIDS epidemic in the transgen- tion against extraterritoriality and that “As we anticipated, however, the base com/#ixzz2QjEOtXFl der community, and eliminating discrimi- suits challenging torture and internation- bill does not include the Uniting Ameri- natory barriers that transgender people al law violations that took place overseas can Families Act. (A ‘base bill’ is the T rans health issues: face when attempting to access quality cannot be brought in US Court. first version of the legislation, before any care. The staff has held meetings with per- Chief Justice John Roberts authored lawmakers have an opportunity to make HIV Advisory Council sonnel from HHC, HRSA, and the CDC the majority opinion. Kiobel was held amendments, or changes, to the language.) trans resolution; surgery to help educate them about the important over from last term when the court decid- “UAFA’s exclusion renders the bill coverage reconsidered issues addressed in the PACHA resolution. ed, after oral arguments, that the parties incomplete. It is not comprehensive and Additionally, in collaboration with should brief on the circumstance when is does not reflect the values or diver- Transgender Law Center applauds the Lyon-Martin Health Services, Transgen- the ATS should apply extraterritorially. sity of our country. Senators on the Judi- Presidential Advisory Council on HIV/ der Law Center has spearheaded Proj- On Wednesday the court held that extra- ciary Committee must allow a full and AIDS (PACHA) for passing a ground- ect HEALTH: Harnessing Education, territorial disputes – disputes concern- open amendment process that provides an breaking resolution recommending ways Advocacy, and Leadership in Transgender ing foreign actors that violate treaties to opportunity to add UAFA as an amend- to address the high rates of HIV/AIDS Health. Since 2008, Project HEALTH which the US is a party – cannot be liti- ment during that process. We need a among transgender communities through- has led a comprehensive effort to improve gated in the US under the ATS, and “suf- majority of Committee members to sup- out the United States. Recently made pub- access to and quality of healthcare for ficient force” is necessary to displace that port adding UAFA to the bill. This means lic, the resolution was passed in February. transgender people throughout California, presumption. The opinion also suggested the time is NOW to contact Judiciary PACHA’s advice and recommendations and increasingly in other regions as well. that “mere corporate presence” will not Committee Senators and demand they are vitally important in assisting the White Project HEALTH has trained more than suffice to bring suit in the US. y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 17

Lively’s Liberty Counsel, identified by N ew Zealand approves the Pakaranga highway as a series of troops mailings that used the photo of Brian Southern Poverty Law Center as a hate or whether it will be a gas that flows over Edwards and Thomas Privitere (son of group, is already claiming victory. marriage equality by 77 the electorate and blocks us all in… Rochester’s Tom Privitere Sr.), created to 44: song follows vote “I also had a Catholic priest tell me and owned by Kristina Hill, without the O hio Catholic school that I was supporting an unnatural act. I photographer or couple’s permission. New Zealand’s Parliament on April found that interesting coming from some- The mailers were a way for the Vir- fires lesbian teacher 16 passed a law legalizing gay marriage, one who has taken an oath of celibacy for ginia-based Public Advocate of the Unit- 77 votes to 44, amid loud shows of jubi- his whole life… ed States, which has been designated as A Catholic school in Ohio has fired a lation from the floor and the gallery. The teacher after an anonymous person sent “I also had a leader tell me I would an anti-gay hate group by the SPLC, declaration of the vote was followed by a burn in the fires of hell for eternity and to insert itself into the 2012 Colorado the school a copy of the obituary for the waiata (a Maori song, sung by the entire teacher’s mother. The obituary mentioned that was a bad mistake because I’ve got Republican primaries. For RMGO, and parliament). a degree in physics. I used the thermody- NAGR, these mailings were a part of the teacher’s same-sex partner. MPs held a conscience vote on the When Carla Hale, 57, received her namic laws of physics. I put in my body a larger attack against the candidates. private member’s bill sponsored by gay weight and my humidity and so on. I termination letter from Bishop Watterson The organizations came together to use Labour MP Louisa Wall. assumed the furnace to be at 5000 degrees the topic of LGBT rights as a polarizing Principal Marian Hutson, Hale said she The bill will take effect in mid August and I will last for just on 2.1 seconds… was in, “total shock. Like your legs had topic to advance their own agendas. and comes 27 years after New Zealand “One of the messages I’d had was that “This scheme not only shows the just been cut out from under you.” decriminalised homosexuality. “Yay, we this bill was the cause of our drought. This The letter was from the Columbus utter disregard these groups have for pri- did it,’’ was the celebratory catch cry from bill was the cause of our drought. Well if vate property, but also the hatred and Diocese and signed by Hutson. “I turned Ms. Wall when she spoke to media waiting any of you follow my Twitter account, in to the principal and I said, ‘Are we talking discrimination that lesbian, gay, bisexual in Parliament April 16 after the Marriage the Pakuranga electorate this morning, it and transgender people must still face like immediately? Am I supposed to leave (Definition of Marriage) Amendment Bill was pouring with rain, we had the most in society,” said Anjali Nair, SPLC staff the building?’ And she just, she said, ‘Yes.’” passed. enormous big gay rainbow across my elec- attorney. “There should be no doubt that That was March 28, and Hale hasn’t “Following last week’s vote for mar- torate. It has to be a sign.” we will aim to ensure everyone is held been back since. Hale is gay. And she said riage in Uruguay, New Zealand today Read more: http://www.towleroad. accountable for their involvement in this that is the reason the Columbus Diocese became the 16th country where same-sex com/#ixzz2QjE3KvIe attack against innocent people.” fired her, for what it said was a violation couples can now share in the freedom to The SPLC also sought to add as of moral law. An anonymous letter, along marry -- and grew the number of free- I rish Constitutional defendants Dudley Brown, founder and with Hale’s mother’s obituary, was sent to dom to marry continents to five,” said executive director of RMGO and execu- the Diocese in February. Hale’s same-sex Evan Wolfson, founder and president of Convention backs tive vice president of the NAGR, as well partner was listed in the obit. Freedom to Marry. “With France poised marriage equality as Lucius O’Dell and Andrew Brown, Over 11,000 people have signed an to embrace the freedom to marry within employees of the National Association online petition for Hale to get her job the month, and England and others likely Ireland’s Constitutional Convention for Gun Rights. Public Advocate was back. to move to marriage this year, the global wants marriage equality, RTE reports: named as a defendant when the lawsuit -JoeMyGod.com momentum for the freedom to marry The vote was 79 in favor and 18 was originally filed in September 2012. is undeniable. The momentum is there against, with the rest expressing no opin- Dudley Brown proposed the mailers RNC resolution reaffirms because the more people have talked about ion. The decision was taken by 29 mem- in an April 2012 email to Public Advo- gay people and why marriage matters, the bers of the Oireachtas, three members of opposition to marriage cate where he described how “[t]he gay more it’s become clear there is no good rea- the Stormont Assembly and 65 citizens lobby smells blood in the water, and if equality son to continue the exclusion from mar- selected by a polling company to represent some pro-gay legislators don’t lose their riage. It’s time for decision-makers in the a cross-section of the Republic’s electorate The Republican National Commit- primaries, I fear Colorado will tumble United States to end the denial of mar- broken down by age, gender and region. [i.e., pass legislation authorizing civil tee approved a resolution reaffirming its riage, do right by all families, and uphold The Government has promised to stance against the freedom to marry for unions] in the 2013 session.” our own American commitment to liberty decide on whether to accept the recom- He added: “What I propose is that same-sex couples on April 14. and justice for all.” mendation after an Oireachtas debate on Evan Wolfson, president and founder PA [Public Advocate] pay for mailing. ... The first weddings for same-sex cou- the Convention’s reports later this year. My staff and I would do all the work, but of Freedom to Marry, issued the follow- ples are expected to begin in mid-August, The outcome represents a major boost ing statement: we’d want PA to sign off, put its name on four months after the Governor-General for the campaign for equality for gay the dotted line, and pay for the mailings. “With Republican support for the signs the bill into law. With the law’s pas- and lesbian couples and children in their freedom to marry increasing every day I would counsel mailing slick and gloss- sage, New Zealand will become the 16th households with the rest of the families in ies, with the ‘two men kissing’ photo.” -- aided by the journeys of leaders like country in the world to provide nation- the State. Senators Mark Kirk and Rob Portman The mailers featured an engagement wide or regional recognition for married photo that showed Edwards and Priv- -- the RNC is showing itself out of touch same-sex couples. T enth Brazilian state itere kissing. In the mailers, however, with this resolution. A party that claims New Zealand MP Maurice William- legalizes gay marriage the New York City skyline was removed to value individual freedom, personal son gave one of the greatest speeches ever from the background and replaced with responsibility, family stability, and limited delivered at the marriage equality debate. The Brazilian state of Parana has snowy and rural backgrounds suggestive government should be embracing the free- Said Williamson to great laughter (Towl- become the tenth in that nation to legalize of Colorado. dom to marry, as have a growing major- eroad transcript): same-sex marriage. In one mailer, bold words on a red ity of young Republicans. RNC leaders “I’ve had a reverend in my local elector- According to a count by the office of background were added to the picture would do well to align themselves with ate say the ‘gay onslaught will start the day Rep. Jean Wyllys, Brazil’s first openly gay of the couple kissing: “State Senator these supporters, who represent the party’s this law is passed’. So, we are struggling lawmaker, 10 states out of 27 now auto- Jean White’s idea of ‘Family Values?’” A future, instead of digging in against the to know what the gay onslaught will look matically convert such unions into mar- similar mailer was used to attack House right side of history.” like. We don’t know if it will come down riage; they include Alagoas, Bahia, Ceara, candidate Jeffrey Hare. Both candidates Sergipe, Espiritu Santo, Piaui, Sao Paulo, lost their primaries. Parana, Mato Grosso do Sul and the Fed- “It’s shocking that so many groups Open Arms eral District. worked together to defile a photo that Marriages conducted in those 10 states meant so much to me,” Privitere said. “I Metropolitan Community Church are recognized nationwide. am sickened by this discovery and the depths these groups are willing to sink We offer a VIP Worship Experience the to attack the gay community. It’s obvi- Vibrant Unconditional Love of God ous they don’t care who they hurt, just as long as they get their propaganda out.” Inclusive 740 Marshall Road Progressive Rochester, New York 14624 The couple has received hate mes- sages since the mailers were produced. Sundays at 10:30 585-271-8478 Internet postings have said that the couple deserves to go to hell and to be killed, and that any children they may have would be better off dead. The lawsuit, filed in the U.S. Dis- trict Court for the District of Colorado, P ro gun groups conspire charges that the defendants misappro- priated the likeness and personalities with anti gay hate group of the couple. It also charges that they Two pro-gun groups conspired with infringed on photographer Kristina an anti-gay hate group to create politi- Hill’s exclusive right to the photo, which cal mailers that used a gay couple’s is registered with the U.S. Copyright copyrighted engagement photo to attack Office. candidates in the 2012 Colorado Repub- This isn’t the first time Public Advo- lican primaries, according to the South- cate, based in Falls Church, Va., has ern Poverty Law Center (SPLC), which attacked the LGBT community. A fun- filed a motion with the court April draising letter asked readers to “imagine 3, seeking to add the pro-gun groups a world where the police allow homo- and other individuals as defendants to sexual adults to rape young boys in the the ongoing federal lawsuit brought on streets.” The group has even compared behalf of the couple and photographer. marriage equality to bestiality by stag- The motion reveals a scheme in which ing a “Man-Donkey Mock Wedding two Colorado-based pro-gun groups, the Ceremony.” National Association for Gun Rights A copy of the lawsuit can be viewed at (NAGR) and the Rocky Mountain Gun http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/ Owners (RMGO), worked with Public case-docket/kristina-hill-et-al-v-public- Advocate of the United States to produce advocate-of-the-united-states. ■ 18 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013 There’s No Place Like Pride y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 19 24 hour emergency service

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PFLAG meets the 3rd Sunday of each month Meetings are at Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church, 740 Marshall Road, Rochester, NY 14624 from 1 to 3pm. Questions? Call: 585-244-8640 and leave a message, or e-mail: [email protected] - Join us! y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 21 Shoulders to Stand On the GLF encouraged people to come out, filled most of the gym floor, with walk- T he 40 and Fabulous probably the first time that the same ways around each group of panels, as well expression was used by the gay and the as covering the walls and hanging from 2013 Pride Fundraiser of heterosexual communities at the same the ceiling. the summer! time. It was mainly used by the media, A month later, Rochester experienced but soon came to be commonly employed. its first Gay and Lesbian Pride March, There’s No Place Like Pride! Just To “come out” meant to emerge from the which marked the 20th anniversary of the click your heals together three times and closet publicly, to acknowledge one’s own Stonewall riots in New York City. Well immerse yourself in fun, flag raising, lesbian or gay identity. Today there is an over 300 people marched on June 28 from floats, music, entertainment, glitz, glam- estimated 600,000+ LGBT individuals Genesee Crossroads Park to the Liberty our, parties, family activities, food, drink, living in Monroe County. Pole, where a rally was held with speakers picnic and more! Rochester has much to On April 14, 1978, the Brockport Gay and entertainment. celebrate and be proud of! Freedom League held an unusual event I was a marshal for the First Gay Pride For 40+ years the LGBT community – National Gay Bluejeans Day. Students March in 1989. There were hecklers then in Rochester has worked hard to make at SUNY Brockport and other area col- as there are now. The Gay Pride Parade Rochester the “gay friendly” city it is. leges had to decide if they were going to today as then is a celebration of our diver- The Gay Alliance has led the way in these wear blue jeans or dress slacks. National sity, and a challenge to be visible and sup- efforts. Pride, the major Gay Alliance Bluejeans Day had been an annual event portive. event of the summer, is a wonderful way at Florida State and Michigan State Uni- These are some of the events which to help us celebrate our accomplishments, versities at the time. The day was used took place during the ’70s and ’80s that while also helping to support this amaz- to urge students to support gay rights our shoulders stand on today. Many men ing organization. and show their support by wearing blue and women worked hard to keep our The Parade, Festival and Picnic, great jeans. Today we celebrate Coming Out issues in front of the Rochester commu- community events, come with substan- F rom 1970 to 1990 Day on October 11. Visibility remains a nity. Shoulders To Stand On is proud to tial cost which the Gay Alliance cannot Rochester’s Gay and challenge. recognize and celebrate the contributions cover without the financial support of sponsors and the admission fees collected Lesbian Movement A large event, the Rally for Rights, was made by these men and women during held at Genesee Crossroads Park on Sept. the ’70s and ’80s. at the gate. Costs include location rental, Grows and Evolves 24, 1978. The official count was about tent rental, security costs, entertainment 800 gays, lesbians, and supporters. Leon- costs, port-a-johns, etc. to name just a By Evelyn Bailey 40 and Fabulous 2013 few. Pride is a fundraiser for the Gay This month our series on gay and les- ard Matlovich, a former Air Force ser- geant who had been discharged from the Pride Picnic! Alliance. bian history continues. We will look at military when he came out, spoke at the This year marks the 40th Anniver- what occurred over these 20 years from By Evelyn Bailey, 2013 Picnic Chair sary of the Gay Alliance and the Gay rally. His story appeared in Time maga- There’s no place like Pride! The 2013 1970 to 1990 with excerpts from Jeff zine that same year. Pride Picnic, the 24th Anniversary of Lehigh’s Empty Closet article of March, picnic will be an Old Fashioned Pic- the Parade and Festival. We expect there The Rally for Rights was held in nic – the way it used to be! Retro is the 1990. response to the appearance of Anita Bry- to be a record number of attendees. The The Gay Liberation Front of Roches- theme. Wear your bellbottoms, shorts, theme this year is There’s No Place Like ant at the Dome Arena in the Monroe white socks and sneaks! ter founded The Empty Closet in January County Fairgrounds. Bryant had been Pride, inspired by the fabulous classic 1971. The first issue was pamphlet-sized, This year’s Pride Picnic will serve hot film Wizard of Oz. So make sure to pur- campaigning against gay rights for two dogs, hamburgers, cheeseburgers, baked and following issues were single sheets years in Dade County Fla. with her “Save chase your Ruby Pass on-line at www. with news and information about meet- beans, chips, watermelon, soda and beer gayalliance.org, grab your ruby slippers The Children” campaign. When a report- in Canalside. All of this for $20 in ings and other community concerns of er asked if Bryant thought that homo- and help us make this event a ruby anni- advance or $25 at the gate. Without beer, versary celebration to remember! the time. sexuality was contagious, she replied “No, the cost will be $15 in advance and $20 The GLF, housed at the University but I believe it’s a learned behavior, and I at the gate. Without beer and food, the of Rochester at 201 Todd Union, River don’t want my kids to learn it.” entrance fee will be $10 in advance and H istory Corner Station, became the Gay Alliance of the Such incorrect stereotypes have $15 at the gate. Children under 12 pay A monthly newsletter of the Univer- Genesee Valley in June 1973, and moved plagued the gay community for centuries. no entrance fee and will be served food to 812 Brown St. At this point the EC Another is the concept that “homosexual- sity of Rochester Gay Liberation Front, for $5. May, 1973. During May the GLF begins was a biweekly four pagc newsletter. The ity can be cured.” The Nazis, for instance, For those who want more, you will be December 1975 issue was thicker, with tried to “cure” gay men in concentration to plan for moving off the U of R Cam- able to purchase food items at a nominal pus to 812 Brown St. two pieces of paper, making eight pages camps by having them visit brothels. Cas- cost. There will be no other food vendors of news. tration was another option. HAPPENINGS at the picnic. Abbott’s Ice Cream will be SUN 6 MAY: “GAY LEGISLATIVE In April 1974, the Alliance and the EC In the ‘80s, Rochester saw AIDS rights on hand to satisfy your sweet tooth and moved to the Genesee Co-op, 713 Mon- protests by ACT UP, such as an April PROGRAM” A discussion of the laws your dog’s, if you bring one. Please pur- before the assembly and senate with a let- roe Ave. Both the Gay Alliance and The 1988 demonstration during a debate by chase your ticket in advance so we can Empty Closet have come a long way from Democratic presidential candidates in the ter writing session. Bring pen and paper, plan the quantity of food more accurately. 8:15. Preceded by a coffee hour and busi- their humble beginnings 42 years ago, but Eastman Theater. The presence of protes- We will have our Annual Picnic Site some of the issues that were being raised tors caused the candidates to deal with the ness meeting at 7:30. Business topic: Contest with a “retro’’ theme. Take us Name, location, purpose, and member- then are still current today. We are still issue of AIDS during the televised debate. back in time to the ‘70s by decorating fighting for elder rights, to stop bullying The Names Project Quilt came to ship in the new community gay group. your site with “antiques” from an earlier Todd Union, Music Lounge, River cam- and for marriage equality for all. Rochester on May 20, 1989. The Quilt era. Let’s celebrate our 40th anniversary In the early ‘70s, the Gay Liberation was shown at Monroe Community Col- pus., by taking a walk down memory lane! SUN 13 MAY: “GLF ON THE Front gave an estimate of 28,000 gays and lege in the gymnasium, and large crowds The Pride Picnic will have dancing lesbians in Monroe County. Although came to view its moving record of lives MOVE” planning for the community in the Roundhouse, and a children’s area outreach via the relocation of community this number may have been shocking to lost to AIDS. Volunteers at the show- in Riverbend, complete with a bounce the heterosexual community, it was still ing wore white, and most carried small house, and other fun activities. members and a “mini – please touch” ses- an estimate based on the Kinsey theory boxes of tissue which went quickly, since Genesee Valley Park provides the set- sion, 8:15. Preceded by a coffee hour and that four percent of the population is many wept openly at this display of only ting for our community picnic as it has business meeting at 7:30. Business topic: exclusively homosexual. In the early ‘70s a small portion of the Quilt. The Quilt for the past 40 years! See you in the Park! Organization, finance of new community group. Todd Union, Music Lounge, River campus. SUN 20 MAY THE NUMBERS GAME/THE GAY PERSON’S FEAR OF AGING, 8:15. Preceded by coffee hour and business meeting at 7:30. Busi- ness topic: Amendments and bylaws of new community group. SUN 27 MAY “Picnic” for the GLF Family. Bring your own meal and some spare to share. Call 275-6181 for details. Fun supplied or bring your own games, songs, etc. GROW (GAY REVOLUTION OF WOMEN) LIST MAY MEETINGS SUN 6 MAY: Steering Committee 3 – 5 pm. SUN 13 MAY: General Meeting. A working meeting writing letters in sup- port of gay legislation 3 – 5 pm. SAT 19 MAY Social meeting: DANCE 8pm. SUN 27 MAY: Guest speaker: Julie Lee from DOB, Farmwood, New Jersey. 3 – 5 pm. All meetings are at the Wom- en’s Center, 185 East Ave. ■ 22 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

Harris told AP “his mind went to Dear old Mom has always had a ‘dark places at times’ as he struggled with delightful way of keeping our fami- his secret identity” because “being gay ly’s life full and adventuresome. In her and being a professional football player younger days, she had a heartwarming Columnists in the NFL were ‘incompatible.’” tradition of always causing some sort of Harris knows that homophobia bizarre excitement for every holiday. espoused by African American sports One Thanksgiving afternoon she professionals like Clemons is shaped by The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers took a break from the cooking and went a particular type of black masculinity are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the to get the good linen tablecloth off the that no longer has to break through this Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. back clothesline. On her way into the country’s color barrier to represent the house, she slipped on an icy patch on the race and prove athletic prowess or man- porch steps and fell headfirst through hood in sports. this. The last twenty minutes will be his the glass storm door. She ended up in G rowing Up It is now a black hyper-masculinity the emergency room, had a few stitches, little secret. and urban aesthetic shaped by hip-hop T wenty Minutes Gone is the fear. The mistake was not but the entire time her main concern was culture and “video-mercials” that not if anyone had checked to make sure she By Eric Bellmann made this time. He knows he’ll go to this only exploit women, but also unabash- horrible place again. That’s life. But he didn’t get any blood on the good linen Feels like an edly denigrate and go after lesbian, gay, tablecloth. hour. Or Eternity. knows how to get through it. bisexual, transgender and queer people. Email: [email protected] Another time, it was late on Christ- Twenty minutes And they care little about its deleterious mas Eve, after my siblings and I were late. W. gets off at effects on all children – straight and gay. snug in our beds, when Mom tripped 4. It takes 10 min- F aith Matters The aggressive posturing and repu- coming down the attic stairs with her utes to get to his A nother tackle in the diation of LGBTQ people allow these arms filled with brightly wrapped gifts. car. Then 15 min- athletes to feel safe in the locker room by world of homophobic There arose such a clatter, my brother utes to get here. maintaining the myth that all the guys and I sprang from our beds to see what That’s what he sports gathered on their team are heterosexual, was the matter. We rushed to our moth- thought. Did W. really say he was com- and sexual attraction among them just er’s side and quickly rolled her over … to ing over right after work? There are no By Rev. Irene does not exist. Monroe see whose gifts she had fallen upon. That tapes to re-play. He doesn’t know. So This myth allows homophobic team- year it was easy to spot my brother’s gifts he waits and stares out the window. W. Another for- mates to enjoy the homo-social setting mer professional under the tree – his were the flat ones. should have been here by 4:30. It’s nearly of the male locker room that creates Then there was the Independence five. athlete came out male bonding – and the physical and last month — 6’, Day celebration when Mom thought it And what happens next is fascinat- emotional intimacy that goes on among would be fun for her father, my grand- ing in the extreme. Was it all a game? He 7” Jamaican-born them. The homoerotic slaps on the but- NFL offensive father, to set off some small fireworks to wonders, was he being punked? He mar- tocks, hugging, and kissing on the cheek entertain the family. Fireworks are dan- shals the energy to consider variables. A tackle Kwame Har- that happen on the field and locker ris. gerous, we were told, so only the men flat tire. An accident. Did he have a heart room would be labeled gay anywhere were allowed out in the backyard; the attack in the parking lot. The toughest With news of LGBT equality in the else. LGBTQ professional athletes must news daily, one may wonder why this is women and children stayed in the house, sentence in the English language is: I constantly monitor how they are being peeking out the open dining room win- don’t know. So he speculates, imagines news at all. But it is. The world of sports perceived by teammates, coaches, and is quickly becoming the last closet where dows into the twilight. and none of it is good. endorsers to avoid suspicion. They are The first rocket my grandfather He imagines W. doesn’t really care. gays and lesbians hide their sexual ori- expected to maintain a public silence so entation. In a homophobic, testosterone- launched spun wildly out of control, It’s all a game and he is always the loser. that their identity does not tarnish the then soared through the open dining He goes right away to the bad place and driven sport, like American football, rest of the team. Harris’s concealment is understandable. room window, barely missing my head. stays there but not for long, not for an Whenever discrimination is the cul- Accompanied by the hysterical screams eternity, just slightly more than twenty The African American community prit for barring great athletes from com- desperately needs openly LGBT public of my aunts, the rocket flew across the minutes. peting openly, it is not only the athletes dining room, into the living room and Then he remembers a number of role models. We need them to come out who miss out, but so too the world. and denounce homophobic bullying, vit- crash landed on the couch where it fiz- things and tries to stop his mind from For example, male synchronized zled out, leaving a small, round scorch racing. He’s playing the old tape. Rejec- riol, and discrimination. swimmers, unfortunately, are still barred Very few role models have come from mark on the cushion. tion is always his fall back attitude, what from competing in the Olympics. A And for the rest of my childhood, my he remembers, what he is familiar with, the Black Church. That leaves many of month before the London 2012 Olympic us lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender mother could never fathom why I had it was how he was raised. But he’s worked Games began, Out To Swim, Britain’s such an “unreasonable” fear of fireworks. on this. Years of therapy. Spiritual train- and queer (LGBTQ) brothers and sisters gay male synchro team, wrote a letter to of African descent looking to black role But it isn’t just her physical abili- ing. He has awareness. He has the capac- the International Olympic Committee ties that cause attention. She has a very ity to face the lie of abandonment. It just models, especially males, in the areas of and FINA, the international federation entertainment and sports. unusual way of looking at language isn’t easy. governing body of swimming, contesting as well. One time she was helping me And then awareness reminds him But sadly, that list too is short, which that males deserve to compete in syn- is why I applaud Harris. It’s important with a 6th grade social studies presenta- that all these dire thoughts are just that: chronized swimming, and their discrimi- tion about the National Parks and she thoughts. His active brain is telling him to note that, to date, no NFL player has natory rules need to be changed in time come out while still in the game. reminded me not to forget: “Yose Mite a story. It’s ideas based on feelings based for the 2016 games in Rio de Janeiro. National Park.” on history and it’s all in his head. The NFL Players Association president I could have never imaged an openly Domonique Foxworth thinks Harris’s Yes, two words: Yose and Mite. remedy? Remove head! gay professional boxer. Then I found I could have killed my mother a few Can’t do that. Maybe just shake coming out will encourage those players Orlando Cruz. in the game to follow suit, but Seahawks days later when the teacher corrected me his head real hard and dislodge those Cruz is not only fierce in the ring but in front of all my giggling classmates that notions. He can do that. He can remind defensive end Chris Clemons queries any he is also fierce for having the courage future gay player’s motive for doing so. it was actually pronounced Yo-sem-i-te himself that this is what He does in to come out. As part of an old bastion of National Park. a panic: feel hurt, then shift to anger. “I’m not against anyone but I think heterosexual masculinity, Cruz as well as it’s [coming out] a selfish act. They just I remember one time when Mom Anger is great, energizing. The nerve of today’s female boxers are breaking down wanted to know who put the yapalat in it all, the injustice. How dare W. treat trying to make themselves bigger than walls and dispelling stereotypes. While the team,” Clemons told Danny O’Neil the refrigerator. That confused all of us. him this way. Orlando Cruz is not the only gay profes- “Yapalat? Is it a fruit?” asked my sister. Yes, he’s been had, played once again. of the Seattle Times. sional boxer in the history of the sport; Clemons cloaks his homophobic “Yapalat? Is that some kind of drugs?” Has W. never heard of karma? he is, however, the first to make it public. my father wanted to know. We quickly He thought he had good karma. tirade as a gay player’s ploy to draw In Oct. 2012 this 31-year-old Puerto attention away from the team and toward uncovered the mystery when we looked Why is this happening to me? At 15 Rican featherweight was revving up to in the fridge to see that my brother had minutes overdue he is ready to pick up himself. challenge Mexican boxer Jorge Pazos “That’s one of the primary reasons bought a couple of cups of Yoplait Greek the phone and scream in rage. Or text. for the World Boxing Organization’s yogurt. Rage is harder to express in a text. Damn no player has done it. Football players (WBO) Latino title. Cruz had more than want to play football, and they gener- And the sad thing is that my sister technology. And that is the mistake he a good chance at it. He won. And he was and I still call it that. “Hey, David, did doesn’t make. Not this time, at least. ally don’t want to create a distraction the first to knock out a stereotype. for themselves or others on the team. you see the coupon in today’s paper for Anger is the treat, the buzz, the high, Harris is doing the same. 75 cents of Yaplat?” a comparative happy place to land believe Even if teammates have no issue with a player being honest about who he is, A few years ago when my sister it or not. It has the potential for action, A Few Bricks Short announced that she was expecting trip- for lashing out, for returning the hurt. some teammates won’t understand why the player felt compelled to grab a mega- Mother’s Day lets my whole family was thrilled. “It’s a And that is the mistake. Stay with the pretty incredible thing,” I commented to hurt. Remember where it came from. All phone and let the world know private, By David Hull personal information that results in a my mother. “Triplets are only conceived those old tapes, those ancient situations. Ah, yes, the once in three million times.” Relive them. Dismiss them. Choose dis- microphone eventually being stuck in all month of May – their faces,” Mike Floro posted on NBC “Goodness gracious me,” replied my comfort over resentment. Every time. So springtime, sun- mother. “When did your sister ever have he paces. And worries. In silence. Sports blog “Pro Football Talk.” shine, flowers and The only way to allow LGBTQ ath- time to do any housework?” Instead he reaches for the phone and robins bob-bob- A guy I was dating years ago came dials the number and purrs into the letes to openly engage in their sport of bobbin’ along. May choice is to purge homophobic stereo- over to my parents’ house for dinner and phone, “I’m looking out the window, is the month of at the end of the evening he commented waiting to see you, wondering when I types from its milieu. But not all sports Memorial Day, the are open to it. to me: “Your mother is an angel fallen will.” Three minutes later his cell phone unofficial start of down from Heaven.” makes its familiar noise, a text appears, Harris said one of the reasons for the summer season. And, of course, how staying in the closet about his sexual “Yeah,” I replied. “So was Satan.” “Had to stop for gas, be there in five.” can we forget, May is also the time for But I don’t want to paint a bad pic- And indeed, in four minutes there is orientation was because both his college Mother’s Day. and professional environments made it ture of my mother -- she can do that all W. walking towards the house. Innocent I’ll be sure to honor my Mom on her by herself. I remember lots of good times babe, not a clue to my drama, the storm impossible to come out without derailing special day. After all, my mother is a spe- his career. too – birthdays and vacations and warm that has passed. They will not talk about cial lady – crazy, but special. chocolate chip cookies when I got home y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 23 from school and grilled cheese and toma- spiritual womyn named Faith Lavender. stood by us, the legal newlyweds, to nized over the irreplaceable splendor of to soup on snowy afternoons. I remem- Flying above the meadow of daisies and mark the momentous day. In 2013, when the woods. Sobbed each time I looked at ber my Mom letting me stay up late to Queen Anne’s Lace, sweet notes from I affixed my signature to the Divorce what was not there. Grieved a change I watch Star Trek even though she kept Faith’s Native American flute purified Decree, I stood alone, surrounded by had not wanted. asking: “Why in the world are that man’s the air. The voices of friends chanted bulging manila folders holding other The squawk of the nesting geese ears pointed?” poetic words of sage advice. Sips of peoples’ disappointments. brought me back to the present, to the I also recall her telling me: “You can purple juice from the sea-blue Blessing A judge agreed that “the marriage present day in this spring of 2013. I be anything you want to be, as long as it Goblet symbolized shared promises of has broken down irretrievably.” This I scanned the surface of the freshly dug makes you happy.” I guess she was tell- forever. have known for months. Knowing it pond where once upon a time trees flour- ing the truth – our relationship didn’t It must have been that flute. I think was going to be The End and seeing the ished. A rippled V trailed behind a mal- change a bit after I told her I was gay. it was out of tune. Because “forever” words on a legal document are very dif- lard. To think I had worried that the Happy Mother’s Day, Mom! expired two years later. And the New ferent. Pain bolted through my body. denuded land would force all the birds Contact David at davidhull59@aol. York divorce cost many dollars and a tor- Leaden regrets that we had not created away. com rent of tears. a sweet and sparkly Disney fairytale I felt a tremendous lightness sweep Dividing marital property reminded inundated my mind. Then my guts won- down my spine. I unclenched my fists, C leaning My Closet me of the day my sister and I faced a dered how many steps it takes to go from released the toxic shrapnel still in my house filled with our just-dead mother’s “adore” to “abhor.” heart. To think that I could not have C ontainment stuff. What should we take? What could After I watched my ex-wife drive imagined the magnificence of a differ- By Meredith we leave? Sister and I decided that any away with her dog, my dog and I walked ent wonder. Elizabeth Reiniger Thing that we had given her would be toward the little red Japanese maple tree, Now I can only smile. Laugh each I fear the Lesbi- ours to take away. The rest we peacefully still in winter sleep. I began to think time I look at what is here. Celebrate an Police will seize sorted into I-Want piles. about the year we were spiritually mar- changes I now can cherish. my microwave. Yet Similarly with divorce, but the guide- ried, the year I had carried that hopeful [email protected] another one of my lines included the logical return of indi- sprout to our first home. I stared at the live-in, same-sex vidual possessions accumulated prior to long branches, a measurement of nine I nspiritual relationships has our Move-In-Togetherness. A detailed years of faithfully nurturing our tree S is for stalking exploded. Wedding inventory printed neatly on lined paper through drought and frost. vows have vapor- facilitated the distribution of the Whats I fell to my knees onto the sun- By Rev. Dr. ized. Shrapnel has bombarded my home. we had acquired during the twelve years warmed soil. I bent into my work, used Sharon Jacobson Shrapnel has lodged in my heart. of our cohabiting. my bare hands to grab chunks of winter- Most of us when It really does not make any differ- Then the moving van took away all matted maple leaves. Cradled them in we hear the word ence why or how the gash started. In her belongings, except her heart. That my arms. Then gently dropped them stalking, think of any case, the answers depend on whether had moved out long ago. onto my compost pile. someone who is you watch 20/20 or Fox News. What Eventually I had to face the Paper As my fingers combed away more constantly watch- does make a difference is the small word Lies, decide how to discard them. Hand debris, I uncovered the striated green ing us, following or “legal” connected to the large word “law- written vows from the private, hillside buds of Jacob’s Ladder. Caressed the firm harassing us, mak- yer.” commitment ceremony, May 2001. The pointed buds that promised to give their ing us feel afraid I should have remembered that statis- Certificate of Domestic Partnership, #25 vibrant pink flowers to me. or unsafe. Those of you who know me tics confirm marriages are prone to dis- issued by the City of Rochester on Febru- Slowly I stood, the better to survey well enough, know this is not the type solution. It was only a few years ago that ary 20th 2004. Health Care Proxy. Power the beauty all around me. I raised my of thing I generally blog about and you Wise Wary Ones reminded LGBT New of Attorney. Photograph album from the eyes, looked across my driveway. My would be right. Yorkers that the right to legally marry September 2004 Spiritual Union shared mind wandered to last year when a devel- You also probably know that I tend to came attached to the right to legally with beloved family and friends. Certifi- oper bought the wild woodland next to take words that have “negative” connota- divorce. The first Right is lots of fun. cate of Marriage issued by the Town of my house. My mind wandered to the day tions to them and looking at them from The second one not so much. Dennis, July 30, 2010. Trash can? Recy- I watched the backhoe snatch the first a completely different perspective. So The Massachusetts marriage license cle bin? Chew and spit out? Shred? Fire? tree. Carry that victim, roots and all, to today, I want to talk about stalking as a cost only $25. It was July, a perfect day Ice? Any will suffice. a waiting dump truck. Tree by tree until healthy and transformative thing we can on Cape Cod. The marriage ceremony In 2010, when we signed our mar- the woods existed only in my memory. do for and to ourselves and not others. was performed by, believe it or not, a riage certificate in the Orleans Town Helpless to stop the destruction, the Toltecs, a group of spiritual warriors, Hall, our also legally-married friends terrible losses, I could only cry. I ago- (Columnists continue on page 24) 24 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

(Columnists continued from page 23) going back in time and seeing where our to devote (or sacrifice) their lives. One talk about stalking as “the process of beliefs and agreements originated. surgically altered (a kind way to state hunting, following, and observing our Step 7: Release all of the expecta- it), middle-aged woman argues over habits, beliefs and weaknesses for the tions we have in life about everything which of her friends gossiped about purpose of transforming them into our and everyone. the other, while another throws her strengths. A Warrior will Stalk her own Step 8: Forgive and let go. Forgive- martini at her own daughter and grabs mind to break her obsession with the ness is not about the other person, but a chunk of her bleached extensions. rational mind, with thinking and with about setting ourselves free and letting Famous and genuinely talented female the Tonal.” Warriors fight for freedom go of the past and harmful judgments. music stars date men who have beaten from their own social conditioning, self- Step 9: Erase our personal history. them, and celebrate the fact that they rejecting, self-neglecting, and otherwise This is not to say that events did not are still together. OK, that last refer- harmful beliefs, thoughts, and wishes happen, but that they no longer have an ence wasn’t so vague, but I’m not try- for self or others. Stalking allows us to emotional hold on us and hook in us. ing to sugar-coat here. I’m bothered. break free of this and the world of reason Step 10: Become impersonal by total- Many of my friends and colleagues we have been trained to accept uncondi- ly detaching from the egotistical mind. agree that a majority of the images tionally. Stalking, from this perspective, is not of women and girls out there at the Becoming a stalker, in this healthy about causing anyone to feel unsafe, but moment are not exactly positive, let sense, involves us gaining control of our about a way of being which leads us to alone empowering. I can’t tell you how thoughts, our actions and ourselves. It freedom and happiness. It is about hunt- many times I have dragged myself out requires us to objectively examine the ing the beliefs in our mind, which cloud of bed, scrubbed my face off, put my things we normally think, say, and do our vision and removing them so we face back on, and lugged myself to and create new and different ways of have greater clarity in life. This is why work only to be greeted by stories of being in the world. In doing so, we are I am constantly working on my stalking what “real” housewife got into another controlling what we think and do and skills and invite you to join me. fight last night. What about the late not being controlled by the patterns, Rosenthal, S. A. (2005). Complete Margaret Thatcher, who died only last which have become a part of our being. Idiot’s Guide to Toltec Wisdom. New month? I suppose this isn’t as impor- Changing these patterns requires dis- York: Alpha.​ tant as Bella’s latest sigh or, brace your- cipline. It requires us to be mindful of self, expressive frown. ourselves and our environment and be What’s Bothering What really bothers me about this is intentional about maintaining control that most people can identify that this over our lives and practicing this on an Brandon? representation of women and young ongoing basis. We create a discipline of Where Have All the girls is harmful, especially to growing constantly being mindful of our words, Buffys Gone? female minds, yet they play off these thoughts, and ways of being in the negative representations as only “one world. We learn how to stalk our mind, By Brandon W. facet of reality television.” In other like a jaguar stalking its prey. Brooks words, the fact that many of these neg- As a stalker, we develop new skills Having been ative representations of women come and ways of interacting with those who born during the from reality television allows us to dis- attempt to get on our nerves or with late 1980s, a tance ourselves from these images, as whom we tend to take things person- majority of my we are just casual viewers and not par- ally. As we are able to gain and maintain childhood and ticipants. We can rationalize the fact greater control over our lives, we learn subsequent early that we enjoy these shows about dis- how to create ways of minimizing or adolescence was enfranchised, undereducated, overly- eradicating our interactions with those spent in the 1990s. consuming women because “we know who attempt to zap our energy, or with Just over twenty years have passed since better” than they. We can enjoy the whom we are still practicing not taking this glorious antebellum decade began, violence of reality television because things personally. and now that it is over, I am left with a we, as so-called “casual viewers”, can For example, a friend of mine has a sense of longing. silently and remotely judge these peo- family member whose negativity wears No, I do not wear flannel, nor have I ple. on her. Being a family member, it is hard ever visited Seattle. I long for the 1990s This, in turn, continues the cycle to totally ignore him, but she has learned as this was a time of such strong femi- of what Susan J. Douglas refers to to neutralize the situation by going for a nist fervor, and even better, media out- as enlightened feminism. Enlightened walk with him, which energizes her, and lets that expressed and celebrated this feminism is the idea that since women provides him with the space to vent. By feminist spirit. From Murphy Brown, are now at a point where they have controlling the environment in which Alex Mac and Xena to The Spice Girls essentially reached equality with men she interacts with him, she finds herself and Ani Difranco (she is still quite (yeah right), it is “OK” and even funny more at peace after spending time with active today, thank God) many of us for women and girls to revert back to him. were surrounded by pro-female images retrograde sexist ideals because “we’ve It is important that we remember that insisted that woman can be both made it already.” this self-stalking is not a race or a com- feminine and powerful simultaneously, It’s a seductive message that femi- petition. It is part of our spiritual jour- most of all without sacrificing wit, self- nism has been fully realized, and that ney and evolution. The pace at which worth, integrity, or even sex-appeal. our work is over. It’s a means by which this work is done is about us and our This was also the time when I was a largely patriarchal media, govern- readiness and patience with ourselves. first introduced to my favorite super- ment and society can delude a youth There may be times when we are able to hero of all time; Buffy the Vampire generation (both males and females) move at a faster pace than others, and Slayer. For those of you who do not into thinking that they are in control there may be times when our ability to know (for shame), this weekly hit of their own destiny, bodies and sexu- move through the process of stalking revolved around teenager Buffy Sum- ality when really they are not. the prey in our mind requires patience. mers, blonde Valley Girl with super- What’s more, enlightened feminism This journey of stalking is an act of love strength and hilariously witty and tends to pit baby-boom mothers against for ourselves, so it is important that we cutting retorts to match. their “girl power” daughters, especially move through this with unconditional Buffy’s duty and destiny as “The over the ideas of obsessive-consumer- love and respect for our lives and our- Chosen One” was to slay the vampires ism and expressed female sexuality. It selves. and demons that lurk in the darkness tells women and girls that they can be Finally, I must remember that it is of our world, as well as to study for that whatever they want to be, just so long my determination to remove all the biology test which may also be taught as they conform to the rigid guide- parasites from my life, to liberate myself by a praying mantis lady-thing. What- lines of femininity, and don’t want too from the agreements I have been taught I ever the high school or college inferno much. And with most teens and adoles- must agree to, and to do whatever I have may have been, Buffy was there to foil cents nowadays being so disconnected to do in my life to set myself free. it, and delivered the message to all of from and altogether unaware of their According to Sheri Rosenthal, there us that it doesn’t take misogyny (or foremothers’ and forefathers’ work (I are ten steps to stalking: misandry for that matter) to vanquish have bemoaned this in columns past), Step 1: Watch ourselves with absolute evil, or date the not-so-evil. it is easy to see how enlightened femi- objectivity, observing how people behave So now that we are in 2013, I’d nism can be a very dangerous thing in our presence and how they react to like to know, where have all the Buffys indeed. our actions. gone? I look around me and I wonder Until the specter of enlightened Step 2: Create an inventory, through what happened to all of the pro-wom- feminism is more directly addressed journaling, of what we believe about an, pro-women’s bodies, femininity-as- by us all, you may find me patrolling what is happening to us, noting our a-source-of-power messages that were Mt. Hope Cemetery for vampires and judgments, opinions, and points of view. so abundant in decades past. One demons, or at least watching re-runs Step 3: Examine our emotional reac- would think progress only travels in of Buffy on Netflix (thankfully the tions and journal what we believe about one direction. entire series is there to peruse). And each of the emotions we have listed. Sadly, for anyone who opens their before anyone cites me as hypocritical Step 4: Look at everything you have eyes and ears to the messages that are for doing so (patrolling for vampires journaled to date, and ask ourselves if now present, this isn’t so. The images isn’t exactly Gentlemanly), I’ll have our journaled beliefs reflect the truth. of women and young girls that cur- you know that it takes a real woman to Step 5: Acknowledge the truth of rently prevail in the mainstream media do a job like this. If only I could kill what is happening in our lives, and are vastly disappointing, and pale in Edward too. accept responsibility for our half of mak- comparison to those images only a few Questions, comments or critique? ing it happen. years old. Apathetic young girls with Please feel free to e-mail the author at Step 6: Recapitulate our lives by sour faces languish over to which boy [email protected] ■ y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 25

women. For 11 attendees, this was their the Rochester Defense of Marriage Act first Us TOO meeting. Two of the new (DOMA) Candlelight Vigil on March attendees indicated they are planning 26. We are again glad to support, show Community robotic surgery in the near future. Of the up, and show the world our beliefs. 16 who attended prior Us TOO meet- In addition, the RWCC performed at ings, some had robotic prostate surgery the Transgender Day of Remembrance in recent weeks, some are not currently Memorial Service in Palmyra last year. F ind the friends, fun, and common interests you’re looking for through in treatment of any kind, and some have Hearing and reflecting on the lives of the various groups listed here. had treatment for metastatic cancer. people that we have lost to oppression, The meeting started on time at 7 stigma and violence was extremely pow- p.m. and ended on time at 9 p.m. Many erful and moving. We’ve also walked CNY Depression E-mail:[email protected], call our thanks to Dave Clawson, Augusta Sys- in the Rochester Pride Parade and par- message line at 585-281-4964 or write tems, for being available to discuss use ticipated in the Pride Picnic. Many of Bi-Polar Support ROMANS, PO Box 92293, Rochester, of “the pump” as it pertains to the heal- our members walk with other organi- The Depression Bi-Polar Support NY 14692. ing process, to Bob Bonn and the folks zations, including local churches and Alliance of Central New York Support at JCC for providing coffee service and a employers. Other outreach opportuni- Group Adult Group meets the third R ochester Trans comfortable meeting space for Us TOO ties have included small groups singing Thursday of every month from 6 p.m.- Rochester NY! carols at local nursing homes and hos- 7:30 p.m. at SAGE Upstate, 431 E. Fay- Group NEXT MEETING: Thursday, May pice benefit concerts. ette St, Syracuse, NY 13202. 9. Topic: Metastatic Cancer and Onco- A phrase you hear reiterated at RWCC The next Meeting of the Groups, logical Care, by Dr. Chunkit Fung, is “I love my chorus.” While this is par- The Youth Group meets the second which is an ongoing semi annual meet- Monday of every month from 5 p.m.- SMH/URMC. tially due to the wonderful individuals ing of all Upstate (and beyond) New Check our website for details: www. that we have with us, it is also because 6:30 p.m. at Transitions Living Services, York trans groups, is on Saturday, May 420 E. Genesee St., Syracuse, NY 13202. sites.google.com/site/ustoorochesterny of our support of our LGBT loved ones. 18. We are a non-auditioned sing- Here is an edited version of the email RCWC Reaches Out ing group that performs two concerts Dignity-Integrity we got from the Transgender Alliance in each year. The two concert seasons run Syracuse: D-I Rochester meets weekly at 5 p.m. The Rochester Women’s Community between September and June. Practices On May 18 at 2 p.m. -- Meeting of Chorus (RWCC) takes part in many out- are held each Tuesday night within each at St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 the Groups III is at 431 East Fayette St. S. Fitzhugh St., corner of Broad St. We reach opportunities every year. In fact, season. Come visit us during the first in downtown Syracuse New York. The part of the organization’s mission state- three weeks of the next season (Septem- have the following services and activities event is free. We just ask that people let for the month of May 2013. ment reads as follows: “The RWCC is ber) and come see us at our upcoming us know if they are hoping or planning dedicated to using music as the vehicle concert. We’ll be performing “Music of 1st Sunday: Episcopal Mass/Healing to attend as soon as they can so we can Service, with music. for messages of peace, hope, understand- the Night” at 7:30 p.m. on June 8 at St. figure out how much food we will need ing, and cooperation within the global Anne Church, 1600 Mount Hope Ave. ■ 2nd Sunday: Roman Catholic Liturgy and what kind of set up in our ballroom of the Word, with music. community.” would work best. Each year the RWCC Outreach 3rd Sunday: Quiet Episcopal Mass in We will give everyone a tour of our the Chapel. Committee strives to bring this objective lovely home which is spectacular. All to life. In this regard, we have participat- 4th Sunday: Evening Prayer, followed food, snacks, drinks and pizza are being by a Potluck Picnic! ed for many years in events such as the provided by TGA-CNY. All TG persons, Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Our Potluck theme for Memorial Day their loved ones and their allies are wel- Weekend is “Picnic in the Park”. It has Walk and various LGBT and Pride gath- come. There is an event set up on this erings. Our chorus considers this impor- been our custom on to find a spot at one site’s calendar where you can indicate of our local parks (usually Genesee Val- tant work and gladly devotes its time and whether you will attend, may attend or energy to these causes. ley). I’ve always enjoyed this event and can’t attend at http://transgenderalliance. you’re welcome to join us! We will make Many chorus members, as well as ning.com. There is also a Facebook their friends and family members, have sure there’s a fire to cook on, as well as event where you can also indicate your paper goods and beverages. Bring some- endured the treatments and traumas of attendance status at: http://www.face- breast cancer. Like many others, we have thing to grill and a dish to pass. No time book.com/events/624819980865913/ . to cook? Just ask a friend or two and join also lost loved ones to this terrible disease And if you need a ride or can drive and hope that participation in the Mak- us for food and fun! please leave a message on our RTG web- Looking ahead to June, we’ll be hav- ing Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk site: www.rnytg.org or on Facebook at: will provide funding and awareness for ing our Annual Garage Sale back up https://www.facebook.com/Rochester- nearer the city this year. If you have been cancer research, along with support for TransGroup. those dealing with the illness in their spring cleaning and want to donate any- Our next RTG meeting is on Satur- thing, contact us through the Hotline. daily lives. day, May 25 at 3 p.m. to 5:30 p.m. Hey, RWCC is a member of GALA, the We can help with pick-up if necessary. it’s finally Spring! Come out and find You can call the Hotline at 585-234- Gay and Lesbian Association of Chorus- out you are not alone! Note: we’re still es. Our chorus consists of many LGBT/ 5092 or check our website for updates on working on the details for this meeting services and activities. gender-neutral members and allies. We -- keep checking our website for further all support the rights of each individ- info on this and SO much more!) ual and to show this support, we sang EMPIRE BEARS We meet in the Gay Alliance’s Com- in front of the Federal Building for munity Center located in the Audito- Lookin’ for some new friends? Wanna rium Theatre, 875 E Main St. on the get out of the house more often, but not last Saturday of each month between into hanging out at the bar? Come meet 3:00 – 5:30 p.m. Parking is available in the EMPIRE BEARS any Wednesday the back of the theatre off of Prince St. night at the Wintonaire at 6 p.m. for and College Ave. Note: if there is a guard supper. at the booth, just say you’re here for the We’ll invite you to attend movies, Gay Alliance and they have instruc- concerts, theater, camping, walking, din- tions to let you in without paying the ners, and parties. We play cards and parking fee. Also if you’re coming by board games. We cook and eat well, bus get off at the Prince St stop, walk especially at our monthly potluck at the up the sidewalk to the first set of doors GAGV on second Saturdays at 6:30. (they have the number 875 in large let- We’re a bunch of gay men who like ters over them). Once you’re in the and support each other. We’d like to like lobby head toward the elevator and you, too. We’re open to gay men of any just to the right there is a hall, go age. If you’re looking for a change, give down that hall and there will be a us a chance. door with a RTG Meeting sign and just come on in! Our web- ROMANS site is: www.rnytg.org or on Facebook at: https://www.facebook. ROchester MAle NaturistS com/RochesterTransGroup. (ROMANS) is a social organization of gay naturists who enjoy camaraderie in the nude. Us TOO: Prostate Our May meeting will be a clothing cancer support optional picnic in the Finger Lakes area. A hot tub is also available at this loca- Great, great discussion at our April tion. If you are hesitating about being meeting! Thank you to all who attended, nude, this is the meeting for you. The and to Dr. Eichel for educating on the meeting will be on May 18 from 1-5 p.m. topic of “Robotic Surgery and the Nerve- Call for location and more information. sparing Process”. We will also be having outdoor pic- This open forum allowed for much nics in June and July as well as camping discussion. For many, the presentation during the summer months. allowed a more complete understanding Visit the Romans web site where of the surgical process and the nerves an application for membership and that control sexual function in men. information about the club is avail- Twenty-seven people attended, in able. http://www.wnyromans.com or addition to Dr. Eichel; 20 men, seven 26 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

The Avenue Pub 37 Year Landmark in the Gay Community

The Avenue Pub 522 Monroe Avenue 585-244-4960 y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 27 Arts & Entertainment

J ason Forbach

O n the barricades: ting like a glove at the same time. In a way, Enjolras is exactly like that for me. Jason Forbach rebels in A challenge, and yet, it feels as if I was “Les Miserables” meant to play this part.” What keeps him going when things By Susan Jordan get tough? “I have to re-center in silence. Jason Forbach is student rebel Enjolras I think we are always over-stimulated and in “Les Miserables,” which runs May 7-12 at the Auditorium Theatre. I find it to be even more true on the road. Tickets are on sale now at Ticket- We are always in hotels and airports and master.com, 800.745.3000 and the Box always around one another. Sometimes it Office. Prices begin at $37.50. is good to escape. Any kind of meditation You can spot Jason especially in the brings me back to an appreciative space barricade scenes. His previous credits when I’m ready to lose my cool.” include The Phantom Of The Opera. As a musician, he is constantly listen- (Raoul u/s) Off Broadway: The Music ing to something new. “I’m really into Ed Teacher, A.W.O.L., As You Like It. Sheeran’s album + right now. I love the Regional: SMC, NSMT, Paper Mill Play- band Raised By Swans, Gregory Porter, house, Kennedy Center, Carnegie Hall. One Republic, Melody Gardot. Those Judy Gold does honest stand up comedy Albums: A New Leading Man, Remem- artists get a lot of repetitive play nowa- bering to Dream on iTunes. jasonforbach. days. I just saw Pink in concert and she By Susan Jordan blew my mind.” Stand up comic and out lesbian Judy It was a dramatic part and I really do love com. Twitter: @jtforbach. Jason recently answered some ques- What should Rochester audiences Gold will be performing at The Comedy serious acting. I’d love to do more of that. know about this production of “Les Club in Rochester from May 9 to May EC: What comics and writers of the tions from The Empty Closet. He said that he decided on a career in theatre Mis”? Jason said, “This production is 11. She answered some questions recently past have inspired and influenced you the unlike any other they’ve ever seen before. from The Empty Closet. most? comparatively late in life. “I had just completed my Masters in It’s tougher, grittier, more powerful than Empty Closet: You’ve said that you JG: There are so many and I know ever before. The famous turntable is gone first tried stand up comedy on a dare. I will forget many, but here you go. Opera from New England Conservatory in Boston and had spent a year with Bos- and it is completely re-conceived and How long did it take you to learn the art Sophie Tucker, Phyllis Diller, Totie Fields, re-directed with beautiful projections of how to do stand up – the most effective Molly Picon, Lucille Ball, Moms Mab- ton Lyric Opera before I finally decided to pursue this life long dream of mine... to inspired by Victor Hugo’s artwork. It’s way to deliver jokes, handle hecklers, etc.? ley, George Carlin, Richard Pryor, and an incredibly powerful production. It’s Judy Gold: That is correct. Someone of course, the incredible Joan Rivers. She pursue theater in New York. It was a scary proposition, starting over from square more modern. A ‘Les Mis’ for this gen- dared me to do stand-up in college, and continues to be an inspiration to so many eration. Even if you are a fan of the film, female comics. one, but it was the right choice. I’ve been I was hooked. It takes a minimum of 10 there will be new things to see and dis- EC: Who makes you laugh today? incredibly happy ever since,” he said. years just to know what you’re doing up cover. Nothing compares to seeing these JG: My kids. They crack me up. And Jason finds creative inspiration in there. When I started out in the mid- stories lived out live before you. The ‘80s, I would perform anywhere I could -- there are a bunch of comics, but I don’t many places. “I find inspiration every- want to forget anyone, so I cannot make a where, all the time. I was most recently emotion seems that much more palpable happy hours, college lunch rooms, street and real!” fairs. I’ve done it all, seen it all -- so noth- complete list. I am a big fan of Joy Behar, in Paris and couldn’t have found the sen- Susie Essman, Lewis Black, Wendy Lieb- timent to be more true. From an accor- Jason added that he has a few albums ing can throw me off at this point. released: “A New Leading Man” and It is all about stage time and honesty. man, Kathleen Madigan, Melissa McCar- dion street performer to the grandeur and thy, and so many more. I love Family Guy, beauty of Saint Chapelle... inspiration is “Remembering To Dream” are available You can sit and write jokes at a computer online and on iTunes. “I also have a new all day long, but if you don’t get on stage South Park - and all other juvenile humor everywhere. I left a performance of ‘Once’ that I can share with my sons. feeling exalted. I re read ‘The Great Gats- single ‘Revolutionary,’ the title taking every night, you will never be a good inspiration from my life as a revolution- stand-up comic. EC: You interviewed over 50 Jew- by’ recently and was so taken by the beau- ish moms for “25 Questions for a Jew- ty of his prose. Lots of things turn me on. ary in ‘Les Mis,’ that will be released EC: Have you ever been heckled by soon. People can follow me on twitter @ homophobes? ish Mother.” What conclusions have you I get goosebumps on my arm. That’s how I know. Ha!” jtforbach.” JG: As a matter of fact, I was in Chi- drawn from that and from your life with your two sons? Any questions still unan- His ideal role? “I would imagine any Show Schedule: Tues./Wed./Thurs. - cago a few weeks ago and there was a role that challenges me mentally and 7:30pm; Fri. - 8pm; Sat. - 2pm & 8pm; group of elementary/middle school teach- swered? physically and transforms me, while fit- Sun. - 1pm & 6:30pm. ers from Alabama in the audience. As a JG: There are always unanswered ques- mother of two children in public school tions. What is life about if you have all the (middle and high) I asked if there were answers? The women I interviewed for any same-sex parents. One teacher men- 25Q changed my life. I learned that every- tioned that she had a child of two women one has a story. Everyone -- and it’s never N athan Lane opens World’s Fair. in her class and that they are very nice. what you think. Someone always has it The action moves from burlesque the- When I asked if she thought they would worse off than you. What’s most impor- in “The Nance” on ater where bawdy acts play out, complete ever be able to get married, she said, “Not tant is doing your best and never ever giv- Broadway with a tatty orchestra, to Chauncey’s Vil- in Alabama.” I knew that I had an oppor- ing up. Life throws a lot of punches. “The Nance,” the Broadway show star- lage apartment to a downtown automat tunity to explain why marriage is a civil, EC: “The Judy Show: My Life as a where Chauncey trolls for assignations. Sitcom” ran Off-Broadway in 2011 and ring Tony-winner Nathan Lane, opened human right -- and I did. It might not John Lee Beatty’s evocative set spins its have been the funniest moment of my set got good reviews. Any plans for a new this week. From the four-star review in that night, but I had her attention and show? Do ideas come easily or is writing a the New York Daily News: way to each location. Lane has won Tonys I felt that it was my obligation as a gay struggle? And how hard is it to get a show Set in 1937 New York, the action fol- for musical star turns in “The Producers” mom. Humor is the most palatable way produced Off-Broadway? lows Chauncey Miles (Lane), a performer and “A Funny Thing Happened on the to get a point across. I have had people JG: Yes, we got great reviews -- I was with a niche role in a ragtag theater com- Way to the Forum.” Under Jack O’Brien’s come up to me after a show and tell me so thrilled. So many people my age relate pany. Chauncy plays the nance — a stock assured direction, he’s funny, sad and that they understand now why marriage to that show because the sitcoms of our character who was a flamingly effemi- touching as the conflicted Chauncey. equality is so important. youth are such a huge part of who we are. nate homosexual. “I like to play with the Speaking to The Slant, playwright EC: Do you write your own material? The Judy Show is actually going to The organ,” quips Chauncey. “I love, love, love Douglas Carter Beane cited the “holy JG: Yes. And my mother writes a lot of Geffen Theater in LA this June, and I am when the organ swells? Oh, you brutes.” trinity” of television’s nance performers: it without even knowing it. really excited! And yes, I’m always think- It was fine to swish and dish on stage, Charles Nelson Reilly, Paul Lynde, and EC: You’re a stand up comic, writer ing about the next show. Writing is a long but it wasn’t OK to be gay offstage. A kiss Alan Sues. Beane then provided some and producer; is there any aspect of show process, and life experience is the key. between two men could get them pum- Depression-era theater history on nance business that you still want to explore? I feel VERY lucky that I have had two meled by police and tossed in the clink. characters. JG: You forgot actress. I filmed the shows produced Off-Broadway. It’s a huge All the more so, thanks to Mayor LaGuar- In the early part of the 1930s there was series finale of Showtime’s “The Big C”. accomplishment, and I am very grateful. dia’s morals crackdown in advance of the something called the “Pansy Craze,” and 28 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

Marty Thomas (Mr. Xanadu 2008), munity Center is located at 1200 Edge- Anthony Hollock (Mr. Hair 2009), wood Ave. Charlie Williams (Mr. Memphis 2010), JCC would like partners to help Michael Cusumano (Mr. Chicago 2011), expand awareness and also to participate and Andrew Chapelle (Mr. Mamma Mia! in panel discussions to follow the perfor- 2012). mances. For details contact Artistic Direc- The Broadway Beauty Pageant will be tor Ralph Meranto at 585-461-2000 ext directed by Seth Sikes and choreographed 1236 or email [email protected]. by Paul McGill. The evening was con- First published in 1985 and revived on ceived by Jeffrey Self and will be produced Broadway in 2011, Kramer’s play exposes by the Ali Forney Center in association public and private indifference to AIDS with Ryan Davis. and one man’s lonely fight to awaken the world to the epidemic. It is a cautionary “8” is a real-life tale about the consequences of fear and ignorance. courtroom drama By Darren W. Plunkett The Bread and Water Theatre’s pro- duction of “8” by Dustin Lance Black was performed the weekend of April 5-7 at the New Life Presbyterian Church. This show is an historical recounting of the land- mark federal trial of California’s Propo- sition 8, which repealed legal same sex marriage in that state. It is currently under review by the Supreme Court, making this production very topical. Dustin Lance Black is a gay rights advocate and Academy-award winning F ierstein’s “Kinky Boots” screenwriter with credits to his name is a Broadway hit such as “Milk” and “J. Edgar.” Black adapts this real-life court drama to the By Brandon Voss, posted on GayNet, Nathan Lane stars in “The Nance”. stage chronicling both sides of California’s 4.22.2013 Proposition 8, Perry vs. Schwarzenegger. Based on the 2005 movie about a drag every nightclub, burlesque, vaudeville, and B roadway Beauty As the judge disallowed cameras in queen named Lola who saves a shoe fac- Broadway house had these gay characters. the courtroom, Black adapted the words tory, “Kinky Boots” is now a hit Broadway There was an explosion of this particular Pageant benefits Forney from the courtroom transcripts to show musical written by Harvey Fierstein, with type of comedy and it was hugely popular. Center for youth the public what transpired behind closed songs by Cyndi Lauper. And then by the late 1930s there was a doors. The sexual orientation of Lola — backlash. There was a new mayor of New It was announced April 10 that four- The opening of the play shocked the played by out actor Billy Porter — may be York and a new administration: Fiorello time Tony Award nominated and Drama audience as they listened to an adver- up for debate, but it’s obviously one of the LaGuardia was probably the best mayor Desk Award-winning actress Tovah tisement by the campaign in favor of gayest shows on Broadway. the city ever had, but he was very Catho- Feldshuh will return to host the seventh Proposition 8. The advertisement claimed It’s so gay, in fact, that Ricky Mar- lic and very uptight. He couldn’t stand annual Broadway Beauty Pageant. its supporters were beaten and property tin recently materialized backstage out of burlesque. He thought it was cheap and Celebrity judges have also been destroyed. thin air. vulgar and so he hired a man named Paul announced. Andrea Martin (“Pippin”), Spencer and Elliott Perry, the children “Great dose of Broadway last night,” Moss as the commissioner of licenses. You Billy Porter (“Kinky Boots”), and Michael of Sandy Stiers and Kris Perry, open the the former Evita star tweeted, along couldn’t perform in New York without Urie (“Buyer and Cellar”) have been performance with a youthful viewpoint. with this photo of his handsome self having a license first, and Moss basically tapped to judge the event, which will take Their concern is not whether or not their bookended by Billy Porter and cutie took it upon himself to shut down bur- place on May 20 at 8 p.m., at the NYU mothers were married, but rather if they costar Stark Sands. “’Kinky Boots’ amaz- lesque, not only for women stripping, but Skirball Center for the Performing Arts would make it out of court before sports ing talent! Congrats to the whole compa- also for “deviance on stage.” That meant (566 LaGuardia Place). Lisa Lambert, practice. ny! #WeLoveLola.” any portrayal of a gay person in a play. the Tony Award-winning lyricist of The With obvious emotion and under- You couldn’t make a reference to a gay Drowsy Chaperone, will write the open- standing, Stacey Jones and Kristy Fun- M usical Feet: character even in a Broadway show. ing number. The popular event is the derburk (Sandy Stiers, Kris Perry) gave You’ll find quite a few references to annual benefit for New York’s Ali Forney excellent representations of their charac- Celebrating National Tap modern day politics in The Nance, par- Center, the shelter for homeless LGBT ters. Dance Day ticularly in Lane’s gay Republican title youth. Tommy Mastrangelo and Michael The Hochstein School of Music character and in the closeted Ken Mehl- The Broadway Beauty Pageant will Celso (Paul Katami , Jeff Zarillo) revealed man-like license commissioner deter- feature male cast members representing & Dance is pleased to commemorate their characters’ desire to be able to call National Tap Dance Day on May 18 with mined to keep gays off the stage. And if their respective Broadway shows, com- each other husband. “Husband is so you like the rimshot groaners that were peting for the title crown through talent, a series of workshops and a public perfor- definitive,” Celso says as Zarillo. mance dubbed, “Musical Feet: Tap as an the stock of burlesque -- those are non- interview and swimsuit competitions. The The presentation was intermingled stop. I’ll give you just one. Dressed in a contestants will go head to head in front American Art Form.” of a panel of celebrity judges, but ulti- with Pro Proposition 8 advertisements A (very) Brief History of Tap Dancing drag as an aging hooker, Lane says, “He that exposed a decidedly negative side of said to me, ‘Hortense, you are nothing but mately, the final vote is in the hands of the Tap dancing as we see it today devel- audience members. This year’s contestants the anti-gay campaign. oped from more than a century of evolu- a two-bit hooker.’ So I hit him with my Unfortunately, the performance con- bag of quarters.” Bah-dum-dum. Highly will be announced shortly. tion. With roots in Past Pageant winners include Frankie tained a number of drawbacks. One could English clogging, Irish step dancing recommended. only wonder how long the script had been -JoeMyGod.com James Grande (Mr. Mamma Mia! 2007), and West African dance and music it was in hand, as the actors were reading from an early fixture in minstrel shows, and it while performing. Additionally, a single later very popular in vaudeville. The pop- folding chair was the only set utilized on ularity of traditional tap dance faded with stage, while the actors playing multiple the end of vaudeville in the 1930’s, as it roles could barely be differentiated as moved to the silver screen, where people there were no costume changes. like Fred Astaire helped to optimize tap Bread and Water Theatre’s perfor- choreography for films. Later, Paul Drap- mance of “8” was not meant to be a er combined tap and ballet emphasizing professional presentation, but intended physical expression while African Ameri- to enlighten the public, much like per- cans in jazz clubs created the hoofer’s style formances of Eve Ensler’s “The Vagina stressing rhythm and musicality. Monologues”. Tap dance popularity declined in the Bread and Water Theatre is a local 1960s, experienced a renaissance in the group committed to making the arts 1970s and continues today in musical affordable and accessible to a broad-based theater, concert dance companies, inter- community. Bread & Water’s annual national arts festivals and jazz clubs. Rainbow Theatre Festival presents “No Tap dance giants through the ages Word in Guyanese For Me” through May include Bill ‘Bojangles’ Robinson, Gene 5 and “The Fat Boy” May 10-19. See Kelly, Sammy Davis Jr., Eleanor Powell, breadandwatertheatre.org for tickets and the Nicholas brothers, Gregory Hines and more information. Savion Glover. About National Tap Dance Day JCC seeks partners for National Tap Dance Day falls on May 2014 “Normal Heart” 25 every year (although due to schedul- ing Hochstein will celebrate a week early) JCC CenterStage is asking for social and is a celebration of tap dancing as an and financial partners to join the team American art form. The idea of National The May show at The Gallery @ Equal=Grounds is “My journey of life through my producing Larry Kramer’s “The Normal Tap Dance Day was first presented to art: a collection of work from my soul,” mixed media work by Jessica Bell. Artist Heart” in March 2014. U.S. Congress on February 7, 1989 and Statement: “My art work evolves from the pages of my journal: personal and com- The production will be part of 2014 was signed into American law by Presi- plex. A way of transfiguration and reflection on my past, present, and future.” LGBT Health Month. The Jewish Com- dent George H.W. Bush on November 8, y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 29

1989. Tap Dance Day is also celebrated in Demonstration traces the evolution of a other countries, particularly Japan, Aus- uniquely American art form with refer- tralia, India and Iceland. ences to multicultural dance forms and National Tap Dance Day was the American popular music. Highlights Travel brainchild of Carol Vaughn, Nico- include performances of Irish Jig, Spanish la Daval, and Linda Christensen. They Dance, African Drumming, vaudeville, deemed May 25 appropriate for this holi- the Jazz Age, MGM musicals, the Harlem day because it is the birthday of Bill Renaissance, and much more. M aryland’s Talbot County T he Big Apple: a travel “Bojangles” Robinson, one of the greatest The dance and live music performers By Merle Exit guide tap dancers of all time. include faculty and students at Hochstein Talbot County, Maryland has special About Hochstein’s Programming School of Music & Dance. The Lecture/ By Darren W. Plunkett towns, each with their own ambiance and The Big Apple. The City that Never 10-11:30-“Doin’ the New Low Demonstration is free. things to do. With Oxford, St. Michaels, and Down”: This workshop, taught by nation- Calendar: Sleeps. The Fashion Capital of the World. Tilgman Island, the county seat is located in The Empire City. No matter what nick- ally-known Tap Dancer, Choreographer, Hochstein School of Music & Dance Easton, the heart of the county and our first and Hochstein faculty member Cheryl Celebrates National Tap Dance Day name is bestowed, New York City endures destination. as a favorite tourist destination for tens of Johnson is open to intermediate level tap Saturday, May 18: 10-11:30-“Doin’ Traveling into Maryland, it was getting a dancers ages 10-adult. “Doin’ the New the New Low Down”: Workshop taught millions each year. bit past lunchtime. We found a place called Fortunately, Monroe County lies only a Low Down” is one of Bill ‘Bojangles’ Rob- by nationally-known Tap Dancer, Cheryl Oxford Greens Homestore and Market Res- inson’s signature dances. This is a study in Johnson, for intermediate level tap danc- taurant. From the outside you would never tell short distance from this thriving metropo- classic rhythm tap dance. Fees: $15 ($10 ers ages 10-adult. Fees: $15 ($10 for Hoch- that the decor has lots of antiques. A chicken lis bustling with shopping, sightseeing, arts for Hochstein Students) Includes Musical stein Students) salad sandwich and tiramisu were just fine. and theatre. Finally, The Nation’s Greatest Feet Performance. 11:45-12:45-“Shim Sham” Work- Harrison Street is one of the main strips City avails itself for the budget conscious. 11:45-12:45-“Shim Sham” Work- shop: This workshop is open to all levels of of Easton. Just outside the Visitors Cen- Traveling to New York is a choice of shop: This workshop is open to all levels tap and swing dancers ages 10-adult. Fees: ter office sat a bus, owned by a Blue Grass what one enjoys. Whether it is driving, of tap and swing dancers ages 10-adult. $10 ($5 for Hochstein Students) group called The Grascals. We would later be plane, or train, the cost is minimal. Air- The “Shim Sham” is the tap dancer’s Pre-register for both workshops by attending the show at the Avalon Theatre, a fare prices start at around $118/per person anthem and is shared by both tap danc- calling Hochstein at 585-454-4596. venue that houses the heart of entertainment, round trip or as low as $90/per person via ers and swing dancers worldwide. Fees: 1:30-2:15-“Musical Feet: Tap as an located on Dover Street, just kitty-corner Amtrak. Half of the fun of any vacation is $10 ($5 for Hochstein Students). Includes American Art Form”: This Lecture/ from The Tidewater Inn, where we would the journey. Musical Feet Performance. Demonstration traces the evolution of a be staying overnight. Central location and The cost of accommodations is still the Pre-register for both workshops by uniquely American art form with refer- comfy rooms! biggest challenge to conquer in The City of calling Hochstein at 585-454-4596. ences to multicultural dance forms and On the first Saturday of the month, Towers. Luckily, new avenues have arisen in 1:30-2:15-“Musical Feet: Tap as an American popular music. Free and open Easton does an Art Walk. Easton is known the last 10 years. Many investors own homes American Art Form”: This Lecture/ to the public. ■ for having lots of art galleries as well as the or apartments in all areas of the city, allow- Academy Art Museum on South Street. We ing rentals by the day, week or even month. took some of the walk, spending some time One can rent an entire two-bedroom apart- at Troika Gallery, just next door to the visitor ment for half of what a hotel charges. The center. Two of the three owners were present, Internet connects owners with potential Laura Era and Jennifer Heyd, each having renters on sites such as vrbo.com. their own style of art work. With an apartment, many choose to Most intriguing was a piece of art that cook a meal or two per day. This greatly Restaurant Review Laura was commissioned to paint involving decreases the budgeted dining cost. Anna Ella Carroll. It appears that Anna Ella Having shaved the primary expenses, Carroll was much a part of the Abe Lincoln/ entertainment prices are the next obstacle. Civil War era without getting her due credit Depending on tastes, there are so many in a painting and now she has. adventures to have. Dinner was at the Bartlett Pear Inn. Jor- A huge draw to Manhattan is Broad- dan and Alice Lloyd are the owners with way. (See previous pages for “The Nance,” Jordan as the Executive Chef. I would char- “Broadway Beauty Pageant” and “Kinky acterize it as “local finest dining cuisine”. Jor- Boots.”) Ticket prices have skyrocketed due dan not only makes it a point to use local to the enormous budgets of shows produced foods, you can just see the amount of work by large corporations. It is not necessary to done to complete each dish, even beyond the pay these high prices. art work itself. There is a limited menu that An important note for Broadway fans on changes every day. a budget is that all seats in NY theatres are With a name like Barlett Pear, I had to excellent. One should always check for the have a pear drink. It was a pear liqueur mixed least priced tickets. If unable to acquire tick- with a pear puree. Boy, do they make a great ets for the exact show desired, find another pear! The bread is made in the kitchen, the with deep discounts. It will be a great per- butter comes from a local creamery called Nice formance (it’s on Broadway!) and it may Farms Creamery. Best butter I’ve had in years! surpass the original choice. An excellent Next door to Barlett Pear is Mason’s, resource for the best theatre deals is Broad- where we had lunch. Indoor and outdoor wayBox.com. seating were perfect on a gorgeous day. Certain tourist spots are overpriced, Rise Up Roasters buys organic beans and while others retain great value. A 60-min- roasts them for some great coffee. They set up ute boat tour, viewing the Statue of Liberty, kiosks around the area or you can go to their Ellis Island, Governor’s Island and many main place on Dover St. more sites, can be obtained for as low as $19 We later ventured to Chapel’s Country per person. The reservation cost for the 9/11 Creamery, where we got a demo of cutting Memorial is $2. the curd for some most delicious raw milk Window-shopping at Sak’s 5th Avenue John’s Tex Mex explains. cheeses. Cows were out, babies each had their and Macy’s is free as are Rockefeller Center, The drinks menu is one of a kind. own indoor/outdoor space. I was able to pet a St. Patrick’s Cathedral, Times Square and By Darren W. Plunkett John’s carries a variety of soft drinks that newborn. Holly and Eric Foster run the farm, Central Park. A quaint storefront rests just a minute few restaurants have, including cream along with their offspring. One favorite was A well-researched excursion can be off the expressway on South Ave. in the sodas, birch beer and root beers. Their the cream top yogurt with local honey. mutually enjoyable and economical. If South Wedge, with more to it than meets FYI, same-sex marriage is legal in you’ve never vacationed in NYC, try a week- Coke is imported from Mexico as it is ■ the eye. made with actual sugar rather than the Maryland. end. A lifetime of memories awaits. Now in its seventh year, John’s Tex syrups in American Coke. Mex Restaurant looks like the type of The beer menu is even more select, restaurant one would discover in a little featuring 20 beers from which to choose. Mexican town. There are no fancy signs Ask a server for their current offering. or elegant billboards. The idea is simple. John’s uses the freshest ingredients “We make stuff that we like,” says John receiving deliveries six times per week. Roth, owner. “We try to keep (our food) both fresh and What it lacks in an overdone exterior, reasonably priced,” says Roth. it gains in atmosphere and comfort. With Although John’s is not traditional or seating for about 25 inside, John’s is often authentic Mexican, John has taken the teeming with people waiting for an appe- best of what he and wife Jeana like and he tizing meal. Fortunately, they have an has given it a personal spin. outdoor seating area, opening as weather John’s Tex Mex is the perfect place on permits with five additional tables. the way to a show or if one is looking for The interior is clean and well deco- a great Mexican meal; even the heartiest rated for the Tex-Mex experience. The of appetites will be satisfied. service is impeccable. Making the restaurant feel even more A simple menu contains the basics of comfortable, John and Jeana Roth are Mexican dining. Tacos, burritos and que- proud supporters of the GAGV. “The sadillas are the mainstay. John’s welcomes organization is great,” John remarks. They vegetarians as nearly every meal can be value everyone in the community they made with tofu or un-beef. “Vegetarians serve and look forward to being part of the are a large demographic of the area,” Roth community for many years to come. ■ Academy Art Museum, Easton, Md. 30 Gay alliancethe empty closet • newthe gay alliances for of the gmayenesee valley 2013 • number 467 • may 2013

ter world for those most marginalized by oppression and inequality. Ove is very well known in library and G ay Alliance Trainings, Tablings and political circles, chairing his union’s polit- Speaking Engagements for April 2013 ical action efforts and serving as a sector leader for the local Monroe County Dem- 4/2...... Sharing Our Stories at the Gay Alliance ocratic Committee. Ove was responsible 4/3...... SafeZone Training at Nazareth College Social Work Class for crafting and presenting draft resolu- 4/3...... SafeZone Training at Nazareth College Social Work Class tions to CSEA and MCDC supporting 4/5...... LGBQTI Resource Fair at University of Rochester Marriage Equality and the Dignity For 4/7...... Sharing Our Stories at the Gay Alliance All Students Act, both which passed back in 2009. 4/13...... Homophobia and Violence at the NELGBT Conference, RIT As a library leader, Ove leads the 4/14...... Beyond Binaries Panel at the NELGBT Conference charge every year to make sure local 4/16...... LGBT Issues in Healthcare at the UofR for the Med School Students libraries get the funding they deserve. 4/22...... Who’s Who Panel at St. John Fisher College Since 2000, he has also been a staff Comments of the month reporter and photographer for The Empty Closet. “Worth every minute. Excellent combo of activities, well-timed breaks, extremely Ove specializes in political journalism relevant and interesting material. Just very well done, all in all. Excellent.” and analysis for the EC. His interviews, “Enlightening, empowering and entertaining. The presenters’ command of the columns and reporting have helped the subject is truly evident. I felt in the hands of experts. The humor and positive LGBT community understand issues and relationship between the two was a treat.” Ove Overmyer social policy that shape our lives and the “Informative, thought provoking, very educational. You can see the wealth of people who are – or want to be -- our knowledge and passion in both presenters.” elected representatives. Ove’s freelance V olunteer of the work has also been published in some of Month: Ove Overmyer the most well respected media outlets, most recently with PBS’ Bill Moyers & were surprised to find so many interesting difference between a plaster splint and a Rochester resident and longtime activ- Company. ist Ove Overmyer is not your typical things to study, from video game produc- more permanent fiberglass cast. Then we In 2004, Ove was instrumental in res- tion, to nursing, to vitiology or the science had fun as we learned how to do a plas- agent of social change. As primarily a urrecting the Gay Alliance Library and public librarian and President for the Civil of making wine! ter cast and practiced casting each other’s Archives Project with Todd Plank and Three great student volunteers took us “broken” arms! We are super grateful to Service Employees Association (CSEA) Gerry Szymanski. Over the years, Ove City of Rochester Library Workers Unit on tours of the campus. They were pro- our Youth Program volunteer, Adrianne has done countless assignments for the fessional, knowledgeable, and enthusias- Chesser, who is a MD/PhD student at 7420 and the Monroe County Local 828 Gay Alliance Speakers Bureau, visiting Vice President, Ove wears many hats tic supporters of their school. Some of us URMC, for setting up this awesome tour local schools and business settings with took a special tour of the Nursing depart- and to the staff at the University who took every day. Everything he does expresses the hope of changing hearts and minds his passion and desire to help create a bet- ment. We saw classrooms that looked like the time to help us learn even more about about the issues of poverty, fairness and hospital rooms where nursing students careers in medicine! ■ equality. develop their skills. Some of us took a spe- Ove is also becoming well known as cial tour of the Music Recording Technol- a local videographer, telling stories that ogy program. There we saw the recording document the lives of so many people students where students learn to record, who call Rochester home. He will also tell edit and mix music and voice tracks to you the most important thing in his life is make a CD. Did you know that the music his three kids and his close knit blended recording program attracts students from on D family. around the country? Youth The Alliance thanks Ove for all his Our next Queer Career tour desti- volunteer work and the many contribu- nation was the University of Rochester GAR tions he has made to our community! Medical Center, or more specifically The T he Gay Alliance G ay Alliance School of Medicine. This tour was the On-Line Resource culmination of our month long workshop Youth Program Y outh tour FLCC, U.R. Directory (GARD) campuses in April series on Health Care Careers. The Gay Alliance Youth program We began our with a visit to Sim Man, The online community tool empowers today’s teens to meet By Kelly Clark a $70,000 simulation dummy that is used providing local, statewide and today’s challenges! It provides a Gay Alliance Youth took advantage of for everything from training of medical national resources, 24/7 at: safe space to explore their identity, Spring Break this year to take not one but students to refresher training for ER docs www.GayAlliance.org make friends, build community, two college tour field trips! and nurses. We learned you could practice gain life skills, become a leader Our first Queer College tour destina- lots of skills using Sim Man. Students had and have fun! tion was Finger Lakes Community Col- fun feeling for his pulse, listening for his lege in Canandaigua. We were greeted heartbeat, and intubating him. with one of the most professional admis- Our last stop on the tour was in the Wed./Thurs.: 3:30-7:30pm sions presentations ever! The students plaster-casting lab. We all learned the Fridays: 7-9pm Coming Out/Being Out Support Group Thursdays 6:30-7:30pm (13-18 yrs old) Gender Identity Support Group Thursdays 6:30-7:30pm (13-18 yrs old) S how a Rider your love Gay Alliance Community Center Ride For Pride 4 is just a month away! All of our riders must bring in a mini- Auditorium Theater Bldg, 875 E. mum total donation of $100. Main Street, 1st Floor T he Gay Alliance Please take a look at our fabulous bik- Rochester, New York 14605 Library & Archives Hours: ers, who will be riding a hilly 50-mile Phone: 585 244-8640 Every Wednesday: 6-8pm route in June in order to raise money for Mondays & Tuesdays: 1-3pm the Gay Alliance. You can check out all Check out our weekly programs 875 E. Main Street, First Floor our riders at: http://www.gayalliance.org/ descriptions and special events: 585-244-8640 events/rideforpride.html www.gayalliance.org/events/youth GAGV youth learned about healthcare Just click on the name of a rider and career options at URMC with Sim Man. show some LOVE! XOXO.

T he Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley: is a non-profit agency, dedicated to cultivating a healthy, inclusive environment where lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people are safe, thriving and enjoying equal rights. We are a coalition of individuals and groups working to empower LGBT people, to affirm their identities, and to create an atmosphere where the diversity of our community can thrive both collectively and separately. We educate and advocate for civil rights for all and for the eradication of homophobia. 875 East Main Street, Rochester, New York 14605 4 Phone: (585) 244-8640 Fax: (585) 244-8246 Web: www.gayalliance.org E-mail: [email protected] Hours: Monday-Friday, 9 am-5 pm Board Co-Presidents: Emily Jones, Bruce Gorman Acting Executive Director: Scott Fearing Business Manager: Joanne Giuffrida Director of Intergenerational Programs: Kelly Clark Outreach: Jeanne Gainsburg of the Genesee Valley The Empty Closet: Editor: Susan Jordan Graphic Designer: Jim Anderson Empowering pride for 40 years E-mail: [email protected] Phone: (585) 244-9030 Fax: (585) 244-8246 Advertising: (585) 244-9030 y Ma 2013 • numberGay 467 • gay aalliancelliance of the genesee new valley • tshe eformpty closet may 2013 31

pleting his 500-hour requirements campuses and community health and will continue working toward fairs on behalf of the HIV vaccine the new, 650 hour Yoga Therapist trials. Patrick retired from the Uni- certification which he will start this versity of Rochester Medical Cen- summer. ter in 2011 following a diagnosis Thomas’ classes are the biggest of prostate cancer and subsequent SAGE PAGE draw wherever he teaches. Com- surgery. Lilacs in Full Bloom Open Arms MCC ing from a place of injury, Thom- What Patrick found after his bout If you’re From Rochester then “Summer Appetizers” as teaches using a different style, with cancer was that there was no which is more medical in focus. He most likely the month of May Hosting at all this summer? support. There was not one sup- pays great attention to safety, good means LILACS! The Lilac Festi- Then you won’t want to miss out port group for men living with or form and health. Instead of teach- val has been a multi-day festival on May 28 as Open Arms hosts recovering from prostate cancer ing in Sanskrit, he uses medical at Highland Park since the late “Summer Appetizers!” Come sam- in the Rochester area. Given Pat- terms for the muscles of the body 1970s, but people have been com- ple and learn how to make some rick’s reputation as a fierce health ing to Highland Park to look at the tasty treats to serve up at your next and explains why/how each pose advocate, it is not surprising that lilacs since 1898. gathering, pool party, or just to give works. Thomas has made it to the he is now the Leader & Program This year the festival runs May into summer time food cravings! top three finalists in City Newspa- Manager of the new local chap- 10-19. Who is ready for the first Demonstration begins at 1 p.m. per’s The Best of Rochester, every ter of Us TOO International. In meet-up of the year? RAINBOW years for the past four or five years. less than five months, and after SAGE! We will plan to meet at the Our May yoga class will meet only five meetings, Patrick’s effort center (875 East Main St.) at 12 each week on Tuesday from has grown Us TOO Rochester NY noon on Tuesday the 14th, then 11-11:30 a.m. in the Gay Alliance from being just an idea shared by depart for Highland Park. Bring a Community Center. Class can be two cancer survivors, to a group of lunch or bring spending money to done on the floor (bring your own over 75 members. He developed a purchase from their vendors and yoga mat) or seated in a chair. Stu- website that identifies meetings and we can find somewhere to sit and dents are invited to stay for Rainbow speaker topics and engages urol- enjoy the music of several commu- SAGE at The Center programming ogy or cancer specialists to conduct nity bands that will be performing which begins at 11:30. The cost is informational presentations at each throughout the day. Tom Somerville $3 per class. Please RSVP for class meeting. Any questions? Please ask Ash- Aches & Pains Slowing (585) 244-8640 ext 31. No one knows the exact cause ley by emailing ashleyp@gayal- of prostate cancer. We do know You Down? Try our new Estate Planning for Non– that age is the strongest risk fac- liance.org or asking while in the Yoga Class! Traditional Couples center any Tuesday leading up to tor. As the baby-boomer generation Local yoga instructor Thomas Rochester Elder Law Fair, on this event. ages, the numbers of new cases are Somerville has agreed to offer a May 7 at the Museum and Science expected to rise. Family history is April Showers Bring May weekly class for Rainbow SAGE Center, from 9 a.m.-12:30 p.m., another strong risk factor. Risk of Flowers during the month of May. Thom- will include a workshop on Estate prostate cancer is higher than aver- Do you have a green thumb? as’ yoga experience started after Planning for Non–Traditional Cou- age if your brother or father had Well it is great if you do and fine if a profound spinal cord injury, six ples, from 9-11 a.m. the disease. you don’t. Tuesday, May 21 we will hours of spinal reconstructive sur- It will be led by Marcus Kroll Esq. Us TOO Rochester, NY and be planting flowers in pots you can gery and a poor prognosis for ever and Miles Zatkowsky Esq. Patrick work to ensure that men decorate and take home with you. walking again. In physical therapy The workshop will cover estate and women of any sexual orienta- Come to The Center and socialize at Strong Hospital, he recognized planning for second marriages and tion and gender identity are wel- with friends all while putting your some of the exercises they taught blended families, and LGBT rights come and have the opportunity talent to work and planting flow- him as being yoga. After a year in and planning. To register, call 877- to learn about the risks and ben- ers that will bloom into beautiful a wheelchair, Thomas used yoga to 926-8300 or go to http://aarp.cev- efits involved with prostate cancer flowers sure to make you “think rehabilitate himself the rest of the ent.com/ElderLawRoc. testing, treatment, and research. Spring!” way and set a long term goal of not The event is free but space is Spouses and partners are also wel- only walking again but of teaching limited! come. Monthly meetings are held Join us on Mondays! yoga. on the second Thursday of each Our winter consolidation is over Prostate Cancer In Men Is Today, Thomas walks with a month, 7-9 p.m. at The Jewish and the doors are re-opening on slight limp and has been teaching The Most Common Can- Community Center, 1200 Edge- Mondays, in addition to Tuesdays! yoga for eight years. He is certified cer Across Nys wood Ave. Seeing all of you one day a week in Yogafit Levels 1-5, Senior/Dis- New Cases May Be On Additionally, Patrick will share just isn’t enough, so please check abled, Pre/Postnatal, Yoga for Kids about his journey with prostate can- out the calendar and join us for The Rise. Facts: and Yoga Alliance Registered at the In the U.S. approximate- cer at Rainbow SAGE at The Cen- programming on both days! 200 hour level. He is close to com- ly 2,496,784 men are living with ter on Tuesday May 21, at 1 p.m. prostate cancer [NCI, 2012]. For more information about US A man is 35 percent more likely TOO, visit the website at:www.sites. Rainbow SAGE at The Center May Calendar to be diagnosed with prostate can- google.com/site/ustoorochesterny , The Center is open for adults 50+ Mondays and Tuesdays 11:30am-3pm. cer than a woman is to be diag- call Patrick Fisher at (585) 787- Hot lunch $3. Internet access, billiards. Library open 1-3pm. nosed with breast cancer. [Prostate 4011 or send email to: ustooroch- Cancer Foundation, 2013] [email protected] ■ April 6: Movie on the Big Screen...... 1pm In NYS alone >18,756 men April 7: Yoga Class...... 11am have died from prostate cancer May Puzzle Flower Planting...... 1pm since the year 2000. [NYS Cancer 1.) What gets wetter and wetter the April 13: Game Day in The Center...... 1pm Registry, 2009] more it dries? April 14: Yoga Class...... 11am U.S. military service men have 2.) What goes up and down the Lilac Festival Meet Up at The Center...... 12pm higher rates of prostate cancer than stairs without moving? April 20: Dryden Theater Meet Up civilians. [Army Times, 2010] 3.) What can you catch but not Bringing up Baby (1938) 102 min As men of the ‘baby-boomer’ throw? April 21: Yoga Class...... 11am generation become Senior Citizens 4.) I can run but not walk. Wherever Prostate Cancer - Patrick Fisher...... 1pm new cases are expected to rise. I go, thought follows close behind. April 27: CLOSED for Memorial Day Readers may remember Patrick What am I? April 28: Yoga Class...... 11am Fisher from his dedication to the Name: OACC “Summer Appetizers”...... 1pm LGBT and HIV/AIDS communities Puzzle drawing Drop off in Center by 5/28/13 to over the past 20 years, and his out- enter for your chance to WIN! reach efforts at churches, college 32 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013

Action Front Center (Action for a Better Community.) Provides HIV TRANSGENDER prevention education and case management Rochester Trans Group services. Training and technical assistance to Social/educational group for gender variant Resources service providers. Resource library open to people and friends. Last Saturday, 3-5pm, public. All services free and confidential. Multi- GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. Check our monthly and ongoing calendar as well as the community section cultural and bilingual staff. 33 Chestnut St., 244-8640. www.rnytg.org for more groups and events. For further information, call the Gay Alliance second floor. Hours 8:30-5pm, Monday-Friday. Gay Alliance Youth Gender Identity at 244-8640 or visit: www.gayalliance.org. And send us your information. 262-4330; fax 262-4572. Free anonymous Thursdays, 6:30-7:30pm, Gay Alliance HIV testing on walk-in basis, Tuesdays, Community Center, 875 E. Main St. first floor. Wednesdays 1-4pm, provided through NYS- Ages 13-18. 244-8640; [email protected] AIDS Care DOH. Thursdays 1-4pm at Aenon Baptist BISE XUality AIDS Care is the leading provider of HIV/AIDS Church, 175 Genesee St. Genesee Valley Gender Variants services in Rochester and the Finger Lakes. Thurs. 7-9pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. resources On-site services include HIV testing and limited Anthony L. Jordan Health Center, [email protected] AMBI Los Angeles; American Institute of Bisex- Prevention and Primary Care. STD screenings, Primary and HIV Specialty Transgender online: uality (Journal of Bisexuality); Bay Area Bisexual Medical Care, Pharmacy, and many more. AIDS Provides Medical Case Management, Mental Network; Bi Café; Bi Definition: Milwaukee; Health, Primary Care, HIV Counseling and Test- Transenough.com; www.endtransdiscrimina- Care satellite offices in Geneva and Bath. AIDS tion.org; genderfork.com; www.transgender- BiNet USA; Bisexual Organizing Project (BOP); Care is also a leader in providing services and ing (using rapid testing) Hepatitis C rapid test- Biversity Boston; Boston Bisexual Women’s ing and services, Educational Presentations, care.com; International Foundation for Gender education to members of the LGBT community. Education Gender Education and Advocacy Network; ComBIne - Columbus, Ohio; Dallas/ Contact Information: Website: www.acRoches- and access to other Jordan Services. Preven- Fort Worth Bi Net; Fenway Health’s Bi Health tion and Primary Care is a walk-in program; no http://www.gender.org/; FTM Information Net- ter.org. Main Office: 259 Monroe Ave., Roches- work http://www.ftminfo.net/; Transgender at Program; Los Angeles Bi Task Force; New York ter, NY 14607; Main Phone: 585-545-7200, appointment necessary. Office Hours are Mon- Area Bisexual Network; Robyn Ochs’s site; day thru Friday 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. For more Work http://www.tgender.net; PFLAG Trans- Health Services After Hours: 585-258-3363; gender Network http://community.pflag.org/ Seattle Bisexual Women’s Network; The Bi Case Management After Hours (Lifeline): 585- information call (585) 423-2872; fax (585) Writers Association; The Bisexual Resource 423-2876. Website www.jordanhealth.org. For page.aspx?pid=380; TransActive http://www. 275-5151; Fax: 585-244-6456. Finger Lakes transactiveonline.org; The Transitional Male Center (email [email protected]) Office: 605 W. Washington St., Geneva, NY more information, call the Program Manager Charlie Lytle,(585) 423-2872. http://www.thetransitionalmale.com/; National 14456, 315-781-6303. Southern Tier Office: Center for Transgender Equality http://transe- CULTURAL 122 Liberty St. Box 624, Bath, NY 14810 607- CDC National STD and AIDS Hotline quality.org/; New York Association for Gender 776-9166. The Health Outreach Project: 416 1-800-CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) 24 hours a Rights Advocacy http://www.nyagra.com/; Rochester Women’s Community Chorus Central Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; 585-454- day. TTY service: 1-888-232-6348. E-mail 234-4441. (See Ongoing calendar). Transgender Aging Network http://forge-for- 5556. address: [email protected]. ward.org/aging/; Transgender Law Center Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus http://transgenderlawcenter.org; Transgender www.thergmc.org Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley Fair Housing Enforcement Project Referrals to physicians and service agencies. of Monroe County Legal Defense and Education Fund http://trans- (585) 244-8640; www.gayalliance.org. 585-325-2500; 1-800-669-9777. Deals with genderlegal.org/; The Self Made Men http:// deaf services housing discrimination on basis of race, orien- theselfmademen.webs.com/ (please send us Victory Alliance your favorite sites/groups) Advocacy for Abused Deaf Victims University of Rochester Medical Center. One of tation, HIV status, etc. Mailing address: c/o ASADV, P.O. Box 20023, several research sites worldwide that comprise Public Interest Law Office of Rochester Guys Night Out Rochester, NY 14602. 24-Hour Hotline: ASAD- the HIV Vaccine Trials Network. Rochester site 80 St. Paul St., Suite 701. Free legal services Social group for transmen. Third Saturdays, [email protected]; VP: 866-936-8976; TTY/ conducts research vaccine studies sponsored to HIV positive persons, families. Spanish bilin- 1pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguys- FAX : 585-232-2854. by National Institutes of Health (NIH). 585-756- gual advocates available. All civil cases except [email protected] Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf 2329; www.vaccineunit.org. divorce; no criminal cases. Ask to speak to someone in PILOR. 454-4060. (LRAD) Threshold Women’s health Meets second Saturdays, 6-9pm. For location, At The Community Place, 145 Parsells Ave., Evergreen Health Services, Buffalo Highland Hospital Breast Imaging Center information: [email protected] third floor, 585-454-7530. Provides confiden- Primary care, HIV and family care, HIV testing 500 Red Creek Drive, Rochester 14623; 585- Spectrum LGBTIQ & Straight Alliance tial HIV, STD testing and General Health Care, and counseling. (716) 847-0328 487-3300. Specializing in breast health, diag- ages 12-25. Sliding fee scale, no one denied, RIT/NTID student group.

Out & Equal Second Thursdays Men’s Cooking Group Social/business networking, 5:30-7:30pm. Third or fourth Sundays, 355-7664. Changing venues. E-mail: fingerlakes@outand- Civil Rights Front Ongoing Calendar equal.org Every Tuesday, 5pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Genesee Valley Gender Variants Ave. http://www.civilrightsfront.wordpress.com 7-9pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. GV Rainbow SAGE Ruby Slippers [email protected] Mny o da Wednesdays, 5:45 pm, Callan-Harris Physical L.O.R.A. – Late Bloomers Group Therapy, 1328 Universty Ave. Meets Weekly on Mondays 7pm – 9:30pm. Identity Group FRIY DA R ochester Coming out group for women of all ages and The Identity Group is for LGBT identified indi- L.O.R.A. – Foodies Group backgrounds. Meets weekly on Mondays at 7pm viduals who have a developmental disability Potluck 2nd Friday of the Month, 6:30pm – AA/NA at private location!.Group Facilitators: Cathie diagnosis. The group meets Wednesdays 3-4 Open Arms MCC – 740 Marshall Rd. Rochester. Timian & Wanda Martinez. For more information pm at ARC Health Services (2060 Brighton- Bring a friend and a dish to pass! Coffee, Tea & and meeting location contact Cathie at Henrietta Townline Rd. 14623). The goal of the Hot Chocolate provided! For more information, Meetings [email protected] or call 585.313.3037 For group is to provide a safe space to discuss contact Cathie at [email protected] or call more information on L.O.R.A. (Lesbians of Roch- identity issues, share personal experiences and 585.313.3037 For more information on Every week there are four regularly ester & Allies) visit: www.l-o-r-a.com increase self-esteem. The group is facilitated L.O.R.A. (Lesbians of Rochester & Allies) visit: scheduled GLBTI AA and two NA www.l-o-r-a.com Gay Alliance Library & Archives by Delaina Fico. LMSW. For more information, meetings in Rochester. David Bohnett Cyber Center. Every Monday please contact Delaina Fico at dfico@arcmon- Gay Men's AA meeting 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 roe.org or 585-271-0661 ext. 1552. Fridays, 7:30-8:30pm, Closed meeting. Born That Way Gay Alliance Board of Directors Emmanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. Formerly 3rd Presbyterian LGBT Support Group. Meets Third Wednesdays, 6pm, GLBTQI Motorcycle Group T suesday First, 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9:30pm, 34 Meigs St. 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 Second Fridays, 5:30pm, Various locations. Narcotics Anonymous Carol, 482-3832 or Kaara, 654-7516. New Freedom New Happiness [email protected]; 467- 6-7:30pm. AIDS and Recovery 1124 Culver Road (Covenant United Methodist Church) This Lilac Squares AA Gay meeting, 7pm, Unitarian Church, 6456; [email protected]. 220 Winton Rd. Men and women. Open. is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who Gay Square Dance Group, Mondays, 7pm, have a desire to stop using. Although it is not 140 Alex Bar. To reserve space: 467-6456; Support Group for Parents who have lost SATURY DA specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is wel- [email protected]. Children coming to people of all sexual orientations and Rochester Rams Bar Night Free syphilis testing First, 3rd Wednesdays, 11am-12:30pm, gender identities, as well as to anyone who is Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. Gene- Third Saturdays, 8pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, affected by HIV and AIDS. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave., 5-8pm. 442- 670 University Ave. 271-6930 2220. see Region Home Care. Free. 325-1880 COAP Rochester Trans Group Rochester Historical Bowling Society Social/educational group for gender-variant We dnesdays 7:15pm, Mondays. Clover Lanes, Come Out and Play. Wednesday game nights. New Freedom/New Happiness Group 8-11 pm. Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. people, friends. Last Saturdays, 3-5 pm, GAGV 2750 Monroe Ave. (Group is full.) Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. 7pm, [email protected]. Bus riders: Take the last #18 University bus to HIV Positive Men’s Support group Rochester Rams General Meeting Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 12 Corners. Use the stop just past the top of Every Monday, 5pm, AIDS Care Center for Pos- 9am, George Eastman House parking lot.www. the hill at Hillside Ave. and before Highland Ave. itive Living, 259 Monroe Ave. 2nd Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Bachelor Forum, rochesterfrontrunners.org. 670 University Ave. www.rochesterrams.com Or take the #1 Park Ave. to the corner of East Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Empire Bears Potluck and Winton, then walk five minutes south Brothers Keeper 2nd Saturdays, Youth Center, 875 E. Main, 1st (uphill) on Winton. This is an open discussion Mondays, 6pm, George Eastman House park- Support group for men over 30. Third Wednes- ing lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. floor, Prince St. entrance. 6:30pm greet; 7pm din- meeting. All issues – as they relate to our alco- days, 5:30-7:30pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Lib- ner. Bring dish to pass. www.empirebears.org. holism/addiction and recovery – are fair game. Steps Beyond Stems erty Pole Way. 420-1400 Crack Support Group, Mondays, 7-8pm, Cross Dresser Support Group HIV+ Mixed Men’s Group First Saturdays, 6-9pm, call for location: Fisr day 289 Monroe Ave. Wednesdays, 11:30 am-12:30 pm. 251-2132; [email protected] Gay Men’s Equality Rochester AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. Guys Night Out 7:30pm. Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. 2nd Mondays, 7-8:30 pm, Equal=Grounds. Gay Alliance Youth • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and 426-0862; [email protected] GNO, social group for transmen, now meets on Wednesdays, 3:30-7pm, Gay Alliance Youth the second Saturday of the month, @ 1pm @ addicts Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. • Men’s meeting first floor. 244-8640 x 13. • Handicapped accessible T uesday Saturday Night Special Gay AA This is a round-robin discussion meeting. If you L.O.R.A. – Knitters Group Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd., S. are shy about meeting people or speaking up in Everyone Welcome! 3rd Tuesday of the Month. 6pm, Eastman House parking lot. Men and women. Open meeting. a group, you will find this meeting particularly 7pm – 10pm. FREE. Equal Grounds Coffee www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. warm and inviting because everyone gets their House, 750 South Ave. Contact Person: Cath- Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David 2nd Saturdays, 6-9pm. [email protected] turn to speak (or pass). As a result, this meet- ie: 585.313.3037; Email: ctimian@l-o-r-a. Bohnett Cyber Center ing often runs long, so plan on more than the com; Website: www.l-o-r-a.com Every Wednesday. 6-8pm. First floor, Sophia’s Supper Club usual hour. 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. First and third Saturdays. http://www.inspiritu- Gay Alliance Library & Archives, al.biz/online-spiritual-evolution-gro/ David Bohnett Cyber Center Empire Bears S aturdays Every Tuesday. 1-3pm; First floor, Every Wednesday. 6pm dinner at The Win- Saturday Night Special 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. tonaire. www.empirebears.com Syunda 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Charlie’s Group L.O.R.A. GLBT Sunday Brunch Bus riders: The #18 University Ave. bus does 2nd Tuesdays. Monthly peer-facilitated support 1st Sunday of the Month: 11:30am – Jines Res- not go by the church on weekend evenings. group for married men who have sex with men. Ts hur day taurant - 658 Park Ave, Rochester. 3rd Sunday Take the #1 Park Ave. bus to the corner of East Confidential, free. For time, place: email: char- Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay of the Month. 11:30am – Golden Ponds Restau- and Winton, then walk five minutes south [email protected]. Concerns rant – 500 Long Pond Rd. Rochester. Breakfast (uphill) on Winton. 6:30pm, first Thursday. Ralph, 271-7649 Brunch Buffet. For more information, contact Rainbow SAGE • Open meeting, all are welcome, “straight- Queer Radical Reading Group Cathie at [email protected] or call friendly” Senior Center, 11am-3pm, Gay Alliance Center, 585.313.3037 For more information on L.O.R.A. 875 E. Main St., 1st floor. First and third Thursdays, 7pm, • Mixed men and women Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. (Lesbians of Rochester & Allies) visit: • Handicapped accessible, take elevator to MOCHA Youth Drop-In www.l-o-r-a.com basement Pride at Work Tues.-Fri., 1-9pm, MOCHA Center, Parents Families & Friends of Lesbians Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420-1400; 244-8640 First Thursdays, 5:30pm. 167 Flanders St. open discussion. off Thurston Rd. 426-0862. and Gays (PFLAG) MOCHA Hepatitis Clinic 3rd Sundays, 1-3pm. Open Arms MCC, 740 Mar- Free Hepatitis A & B vaccinations, third Tues- GLOB&L (Gays & Lesbians of Bausch & shall Rd. 244-8640 x 27; [email protected]. Sn u days Lomb). days, 5:30-7pm, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420- Gay Alliance Library & Archives Step in the Right Direction 1400 Meets every third Thursday in Area 67 confer- ence room at the Optic Center. Voice mail: Sunday hours ended. 7:30-9pm. 1275 Spencerport Road (Trinity Alli- ance Church) This is an NA meeting that is Women’s Community Chorus 338-8977 Rochester General Assembly Rehearsals each Tuesday, 6:30-9pm, Down- open to all addicts who have a desire to stop Gay Alliance Youth Sundays, Flying Squirrel Community Center, using. Although it is not specifically a gay-ori- town United Pres. Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh 285 Clarissa St. Street. 234-4441, www.therwcc.org Thursdays, 3:30-7pm, Gay Alliance Youth Cen- ented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all ter, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, first Unity Fellowship Church sexual orientations and gender identities. Each Free HIV Testing floor. 244-8640 x 13. Sundays, 1:30 pm, Lutheran Church of Peace, week features a reading from NA literature, fol- lowed by discussion. 9am-7pm. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. Coming Out Being Out Youth Support 125 Caroline St., 14620. 520-6188. Group Dignity-Integrity Rochester Gay Men 6:30-7:30pm; ages 13-18 Gay Alliance Youth 1st Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist with music; 8pm. St. Luke/St. Simon’s Episcopal Church, We dnesday Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, 2nd Sunday: 5pm Roman Catholic Liturgy of the 17 S. Fitzhugh Street. Bus riders use the L.O.R.A. – Poker, Cards & Gaymes! first floor. 244-8640 x 13. Word with music; 3rd Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Fitzhugh Street stop on Main Street at the Coun- 3rd Wednesday of the Month, 7pm – Open Eucharist (quiet); 4th Sunday: 5pm Prayers to Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus ty Office Building and walk south one block. Arms MCC – 740 Marshall Rd. Rochester. start the week, followed by potluck supper. • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and Everyone is welcome! Bring a friend and your Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. 6:30-9pm, 423-0650 Open Arms Metropolitan Community addicts own snacks/munchies. Coffee, Tea & Hot Choc- • Men’s meeting olate provided. For more information, contact Church Free confidential walk-in HIV testing 740 Marshall Rd., Chili, 10:30am, 271-8478 • NOT handicapped accessible Cathie at [email protected] or call Every Thursday night, 5-8pm, AIDS Care, Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by 585.313.3037 - For more information on 259 Monroe Ave. 442-2220 Gay Men’s Alcoholics Anonymous open discussion. L.O.R.A. (Lesbians of Rochester & Allies) visit: St. Luke’s/St. Simon Cyrene Church, www.l-o-r-a.com Gay Alliance Youth Gender Identity Thursdays, 6:30-7pm, Ages 13-18, Gay Alli- 17 S. Fitzhugh St. 8:30pm, 232-6720, Weekly. U.R. Pride Network ance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St., 1st floor Closed meeting 7:30pm, Gamble Room in Rush Rhees Library. (Prince St. entrance). 244-8640 ext 13. [email protected] 34 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013 May 2013 Classifieds Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional 10 words is FRIDAY 3 https://www.facebook.com/Rochester- another $1. We do not bill for classifieds, so please send or bring ad and pay- “No Word in Guyanese for Me.” TransGrouphttp://transgenderalliance. ment to: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, New York Opening of third Rainbow Festival play, ning.com. 14605. produced by Bread & Water Theatre, 243 Empire State Pride Agenda Spring Paying by check: checks must be made out to Gay Alliance. The deadline Rosedale St. off Monroe. 8 pm. Also May Dinner. Rochester Riverside Convention is the 15th of the month, for the following month’s issue. We cannot accept 4, 8 pm, and May 5, 2 pm. Center. Reception 5:45; dinner and pro- ads over the phone. Pay when you place your ad. We will accept only ads gram 7 pm. Hosts: Josh Kilmer-Pur- accompanied by name and phone number. Neither will be published, but we saturY DA 14 cell and Brent Ridge (“The Fabulous Astrodance. Dance by Thomas Warf- must be able to confirm placement. Beekman Boys”). Keynote: Donna Rose. The Empty Closet is not responsible for financial loss or physical injury that ield. RIT Imagine Festival, Ingle Audito- Screening of trailer for Shoulders To rium, 11 am and 2 pm. may result from any contact with an advertiser. Advertisers must use their own Stand On video; Community Service box number, voice mail, e-mail or personal address/phone number. SUNY DA 5 Award to Ralph Carter. 917-522-3403; Cinco de Mayo. www.prideagenda.org. Dignity Integrity. Episcopal Mass/ Rochester Rams bar night. Can-Am ANNOUNCEMENTS towers or anything made of metal. Call Healing Service, with music. 5 pm, St. weekend opener as the Rams welcome the Recycle Queen: 585-305-9602. Children’s Ministry thriving at Handyman: Simple repairs or full Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Ottawa Knights at the Bachelor Forum, Open Arms Metropolitan Community Fitzhugh St. 670 University Ave. 9 pm-2 am. renovations, no job is too large or small. Church for toddlers to ‘tweens. Join us for Carpentry, Plumbing, Electrical, Interi- MONDAY 6 SUNDAY 19 vibrant, inclusive, progressive worship on Dignity Integrity. or & Exterior. 35 years experience. Call Rainbow SAGE at the Center. Yoga Quiet Episcopal Sundays at 10:30am. 740 Marshall Road Alan & Bill 585-204-0632 or cell 304- classes begin, led by Tom Somerville. 11 am, Mass in the Chapel. 5 pm, St. Luke’s and off Chili Avenue. info@openarmsmcc. 517-6832. Gay Alliance, first floor, 875 E. Main St. St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. org (585) 271-8478 Hate to paint or clean gutters? I have THURSDAY 9 MONDAY 20 SERVICES tall ladders! Dale’s Pleasure Painting and Out & Equal Second Thursday Net- Rainbow SAGE 11:30 am at Gay Alli- Man to Man Rubdown. Relax with Gutter Cleaning has very reasonable rates working. 5:30-7 pm, JCC, 1200 Edge- ance Center for lunch. Then to Dryden this experienced, fit, healthy. middle-aged, for painting year-round and gutter clean- wood Ave. Tapas 177 Lounge, 177 St. Theatre of George Eastman House for non-smoking GWM. Central location. ing in the spring or fall. 585-576-5042. Paul St. 1:30 screening of “Bringing Up Baby” Private home. Incalls/outcalls. Reason- Email [email protected]. Us TOO prostate cancer support with Katharine Hepburn, Cary Grant able rates. Cell #585-773-2410 or home Martin Ippolito master electrician. group. Topic: Metastatic Cancer and and a leopard. For more SAGE events, see #585-235-6688 or email:magichands@ Electrical work, telephone jacks, cable Oncological Care, by Dr. Chunkit Fung, page 31. rochester.rr.com TV, burglar alarm systems, paddle fans. SMH/URMC. 7-9 pm. Details: www. SUNY DA 26 Wedding Space and clergy services 585-266-6337. sites.google.com/site/ustoorochesterny Dignity Integrity. Evening Prayer, available. Celebrate your special day at FOR SALE SUNY DA 12 followed by a Potluck Picnic! Potluck Open Arms Metropolitan Community Exquisite metal king bed, perfect Dignity Integrity. Roman Catholic theme for Memorial Day Weekend: “Pic- Church 740 Marshall Rd. off Chili Ave. condition. Includes headboard, footboard, Liturgy of the Word, with music. 5 pm, nic in the Park”. Hotline at 585-234- [email protected] (585) 271-8478 side rails and platform. Colors: black, St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. 5092. Free recycling/hauling of motor gold, gunmetal grey, copper. Stunning Fitzhugh St. TUESDAY 28 vehicles, kitchen/laundry appliances, fur- designer quality and one of a kind. $850. naces, water heaters, lawn equipment, 585-734-9770. W EDNesDAY 15 Rochester Trans Group. Monthly snow blowers, metal fencing, pipes, PC Empty Closet deadline for June meeting, 3-5:30 pm, Gay Alliance, first issue. 244-9030; [email protected]. floor, 875 E. Main St. SATURY DA 18 FRI1 DAY 3 ROMANS clothing optional picnic, Ambush Buffalo Pride Party. 6 pm-1 Finger Lakes. 1-5 pm. For location e-mail am, Cobblestone, 130 S. Park Ave., Buffa- [email protected], call 585-281- lo. Featuring Kristen Becker, bands, DJs. 4964 or write ROMANS, PO Box 92293, $10. www.ambushbuffalo.com. Rochester, NY 14692. J Une Meeting of the Groups. 2013 gath- ering of WNY trans groups, 431 East SATURDAY 1 Fayette St. in downtown Syracuse. 2 Big Gay Prom. Theme: Alice in Won- pm. Information available at http://www. derland. 7 pm, Cathedral Hall, Auditori- facebook.com/events/624819980865913/ um Center, 875 E. Main St. LGBT youth If you need a ride or can drive and allies ages 13-20. $15. Info: Kelly please leave a message on RTG web- Clark, 244-8640 ext. 19. site: www.rnytg.org or on Facebook at y Ma 2013 • number 467 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet 35

The Empty Closet is published by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500 Bed & Breakfast Rochester, New York 14605 © 2013, All rights reserved. Editor-in-Chief: Susan Jordan Staff Reporter: Ove Overmyer Graphic Design: Jim Anderson Advertising policy: The Empty Closet does not print advertisements that contain nude drawings or photographs, nor does it print advertising that states that the person pictured in the ad is for sale, or that you will “get” that particular person if you patronize the establishment advertised. Advertisements that are explicitly racist, sexist, ageist, ableist or homo- phobic will be refused; advertisements from organizations that are sexist, racist, ageist, ableist or anti-gay will also be refused. All political advertisements must contain infor- mation about who placed them and a method of contact. Additionally, The Empty Closet does not print negative or “attack” advertisements, whether they relate to a product or politics and no matter in whose interest the ad is being produced. A negative advertisement is defined as one that focuses upon a rival product, or in the political area, a rival election candidate or party, in order to point out sup- posed flaws and to persuade the public not to buy it (or vote for him or her). The Empty Closet maintains, within legal boundaries, neutrality regarding products, political candidates and parties. However, “attack” ads that fail to provide undisputable evidence that the information in the ad is true do not further in any way the objectives and policies of the Gay Alliance or The Empty Closet, includ- ing the primary tenet that The Empty Closet’s purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community and to provide an impartial forum for ideas. Submissions: For publication, submit news items, ads, photos, letters, stories, poetry, ads, photographs or art by mail or in per- son to The Empty Closet office by the 15th of the month. Design services for non-camera ready ads are available for a fee. ([email protected]) Publication Information: The Empty Closet is published 11 times a year (Decem- ber and January combined) by The Empty Closet Press for the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc. Approxi- mately 5000 copies of each issue are distributed during the first week of the month, some by mail in a plain sealed envelope. The publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles is not an indication of the sexual or affectional orientation of that person or the members of that organization. For further informa- tion, please write to The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main St., Rochester NY. 14605, call (585) 244-9030 or e-mail emp- [email protected]. The Empty Closet is the official publication of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc., as stated in the bylaws of that organization. Its purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community about local and national gay- related news and events; to provide a forum for ideas and creative work from the local gay community; to help pro- mote leadership within the community, and to be a part of a national network of lesbian and gay publications that exchange ideas and seek to educate. Part of our purpose is to maintain a middle position with respect to the entire community. We must be careful to present all viewpoints in a way that takes into consid- eration the views of all – women, men, people of color, young and old, and those from various walks of life. The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessar- ily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. The Empty Closet shall not be liable for any loss or expense that results from the publication (whether correctly or incorrectly) or omission of an ad. In the event of non-payment, your account may be assigned to a collection agency or an attorney, and will be liable for the charges paid by us to such collection agency or attorney. Letters to the editor: The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other con- tributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. We will print letters at the edi- tor’s discretion and on a space available basis. Only one letter by the same writer in a six-month period is allowed. We will not print personal attacks on individuals, nor will we be a forum for ongoing disputes between individuals. We reserve the right to edit for space and clarity. We will print anonymous letters if the name and phone number are provided to the Editor; confidentiality will be respected. Submissions are due by the 15th of the month at: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605; e-mail: [email protected]. The online edi- tion of EC is available at www.gayalliance.org. 36 the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 467 • may 2013