Read Ebook {PDF EPUB} Talk To Me by Rachel Burns Talk To Me by Rachel Burns. Click on the book to read Amazon reviews. Anderson, Laurie Halse SPEAK New York : Farrar Straus Giroux, 1999 IL YA ISBN 0374371520. I am an outcast. My first day of high school and I can see, as we are herded into the auditorium for orientation, that I don�t fit in. Everyone else falls into a clan � you know, a clique; THE JOCKS, THE CHEERLEADERS, FUTURE FASCISTS OF AMERICA, GOTHS, �well, you get the idea. Me? I am clanless�I have entered high school with the wrong hair, the wrong clothes, and definitely the wrong attitude. No one will speak to me. I am an outcast. The orientation begins with �the rules� � All lies! #1. We are here to help you! #2. You will have enough time to get to your classes between bells. #3. The dress code will be enforced. #4. No smoking is allowed on school grounds. #5. Our football team will win the championship. #6. We expect more of you here. #7. Guidance counselors are always available to listen. #8 Your schedule was created with your needs in mind. #9. Your locker combination is private. #10. These will be the years you will look back on most fondly. Yeah, right! Fondly. NOT. I didn�t want high school to start out this way � it just sort of happened. I�m not used to failing classes. I don�t skip school. I talk. I have friends. It all started at that end-of-the-summer party. Big deal, that party. Rachel and I were pretty excited about going to a high school party. Now, they all blame me � they blame me for calling the cops and closing down the party. Even Rachel hates me. I am an outcast. No one knows the truth about that night. No one CARES to know the truth. I don�t know the truth - can�t face the truth, anyway. So, I get a brilliant idea � if they won�t talk to me, then I won�t talk to them! I�ll just retreat. Yes, I�ll retreat into that old janitor�s closet I found on Senior Hall. No one will find me there. The closet is abandoned � it has no purpose, no name�. Perfect, for me. There, I can think. Problem is, I don�t want to think. I fainted in biology class the other day and hit my head on the table. I was really worried� Worried when the doctor looked into the back of my eyes with a bright light. Could she read the thoughts hidden there? What will she do? Call the cops? Send me to the nuthouse? Can�t they understand that the whole point of NOT talking about it, of silencing the memory, is to make it go away. IT won�t. I�ll need brain surgery to cut IT out of my head. IT is my nightmare � and I can�t wake up. It�s the first morning of high school and Melinda has seven new notebooks, a skirt she hates and a stomach ache. The empty school bus comes to her corner. She�s the first pick-up of the day. She sits in the front, hoping to make eye contact with one of her friends, that is if any of them has decided to talk to her yet. The bus picks up students in groups of four or five. As they walk down the aisle, people who were Melinda�s middle school lab partners or gym buddies glare at her. This is what she�s been dreading. As they leave the last stop, she is the only person sitting alone. At school, the ninth graders are herded into the auditorium. Again Melinda has no one to sit with. The kids behind her laugh at something so loud, she knows they�re laughing about her. She turns around only to see Rachel, her ex-best friend, at the center of the crowd. This is the girl who suffered through brownies with Melinda, who taught her how to swim, who understood about her parents. She�s the only person in the entire galaxy Melinda is dying to tell the truth about that night. Their eyes meet for a second and Melinda�s throat burns with the desire to talk. But Rachel mouths the words �I hate you� and turns back to laughing with her friends. Rachel actually hates Melinda. But then so does everybody else. Who can blame them? That loser, Melinda, busted the biggest party of the summer by calling the cops. If only she could tell Rachel why she made the call. But obviously, she can�t. And if she can�t tell Rachel, she can�t tell anyone. The way Melinda sees it, if she�s got to keep something this painful to herself, why bother talking at all? (Ona Gritz, [email protected]) Seven new notebooks, a skirt she hated, and a stomachache. Melinda Sordino started out her first day of high school with only that. She used to be a girl with lots of friends, with everyone on her side, until she busted a summer party by calling the cops. Now, since she is in high school, Melinda is trying to figure out where she belongs and who she is, while trying to gain her old friends back. Since nobody will talk, or even acknowledge her, she has become anti-social to everyone around her, except her art teacher. When Melinda takes her first step onto the school bus, every eye locks onto her. Gossip has spread about what happened at that summer party. By now, everyone knows. Kids are whispering and pointing at her all day long, talking about her when she isn�t around. All Melinda wants is someone who she can trust and call a friend. When the bus reaches school, Melinda thinks her day can�t possibly get any worse, it does. I thought Speak was fantastic! When I started reading it, I couldn�t put it down. From page 1 to page 198, Laurie Halse Anderson captures every little detail that teens go through everyday like, dealing with all the cliques and becoming accepted by your peers. Speak kept me on the edge of my seat throughout the whole book. I would recommend Speak to anybody, boy or girl, from middle school to high school. (Kayti L., Maroa - Forsyth Middle School) Talk To Me by Rachel Burns. I can see we're thinkin' 'bout the same things Yes, I see your expression when the phone rings We both know there's something happenin' here. There's no sense in dancing 'round the subject A wound gets worse when it's treated with neglect Well don't turn now, there's nothing here to fear. You can talk to me Talk to me You can talk to me You can set your secrets free, baby. Dusty words lying under carpets Seldom heard, well, must you keep your secrets Locked inside, hidden deep from view? Was it all that hard, is it all that tough? Now, I've shown you all my cards, well isn't that enough? You can hide your hurt, but there's something you can do. Related. You can talk to me You can talk to me When you're down now You can talk to me T-t-talk to me. Though we lay face to face and cheek to cheek Our voices stray from the common ground where they could meet The walls run high to veil a swelling tear. Oh, let the walls burn down, set your secrets free You can break their bounds, 'cause you're safe with me You can lose your doubt, 'cause you'll find no danger here. You can talk to me Talk to me When you're down now You can talk to me You can set your secrets free, baby. How a gala breathed new life, hope into George Street Playhouse, theater. Broadway favorite Jeremy Jordan recently stood on the George Street Playhouse stage, ready to sing. "He stood there and as he was starting to sing, he just stopped and said, 'I need a minute,' " George Street artistic director David Saint said. "And he got very emotional and he said, 'I didn't realize how much it was going to affect me.' " Coming more than 14 months after the COVID-19 pandemic shuttered performance venues along with the rest of the world, the moment of return, of singing in a theater, on stage, with lights, sound and a baby grand piano topped with a giant bouquet of flowers has a reverence to it. And that's exactly how Saint planned it. Andre De Shields performs for George Street Playhouse's 2021 gala. (Photo: Photo by Michael Boylan) With vaccines in arms, capacities and other restrictions starting to be lifted and spring in the air, the general sense that we've turned a corner has many feeling something they haven't in a long while: hope. "I wanted to make it celebrating that we're coming to the end of the tunnel and we're seeing that light at the end of the tunnel," Saint said of the New Brunswick theater's annual gala benefit, set for April 29. And so while the gala is virtual this year, Saint gathered as many of the evening's star-studded performers as possible to sing in person on George Street's stage, filming performances that will be screened as part of a cabaret. "It was very powerful," he said. "Of course the last element of it is the community celebrating the ritual with you, and that we're going to have to wait until the fall, but this was a great taste of what we've all been waiting for." Jackie Burns performs for George Street Playhouse's 2021 gala. (Photo: Photo by Michael Boylan) "I thought they really went above and beyond to create something, especially in this time where we are limited with our creativity…to still make a special event for these times," said Jackie Burns ("Wicked," "If/Then"), another of the evening's performers. Actor and playwright Laiona Michelle, whose "Little Girl Blue: The Nina Simone Musical" made its world premiere at George Street, is part of the gala's welcoming committee. While she says she is looking forward to getting to put names with faces in the virtual cocktail hour rooms and meeting new people, she also says her role is also giving thanks. "This gala, this welcoming committee, is going to be all of our saying thank you to all the people who stand in the gaps for us, during this time, this entire year that has been just been an emotional roller coaster." Michelle said she is appreciative of the support George Street showed "Little Girl Blue." She is carefully selecting the theater for its next staging, and her wish is to see it hit Broadway. The gala. Bobby Conte Thornton and Teal Wicks in rehearsal for "Last Days of Summer" at George Street Playhouse, in their new home at the New Brunswick Performing Arts Center beginning Oct. 15. (Photo: Courtesy of George Street Playhouse) The star-studded lineup, which includes many whose work has graced George Street's stage and other "friends" of the theater, is set to feature Lewis Black, Chris Bohjalian, Felicia Boswell, David Bryan, Burns, Karen Burthwright, Bobby Conte Thornton, Andre De Shields, Joe DiPietro, Ann Dowd, Rachel Dratch, Steve Guttenberg, Jordan, Michelle, Nancy Opel, Maulik Pancholy, David Hyde Pierce, Renee Taylor, Mary Testa, Marlo Thomas and a "very special surprise guest." Honored with the Thomas H. Kean Arts Advocacy Award at the gala will be former New Jersey. Gov. Thomas H. Kean, Thomas F. Kelso, chairperson of the New Brunswick Cultural Center and James N. Heston, chairperson of George Street Playhouse’s Board of Trustees. Song selections. Performers were asked to select a celebratory piece or otherwise mark the moment. Thornton ("Company," "A Bronx Tale"), who performed in "Last Days of Summer" at George Street in 2019, chose "No One Is Alone" from "Into The Woods." "It's one of the greatest songs ever written from musical theater," he said. "I think that song is always timely and relevant, but it's especially (now), given the year we've all been going through." Posted! A link has been posted to your Facebook feed. Interested in this topic? You may also want to view these photo galleries: Tony Award winner De Shields took the opportunity to expand the definition of "celebratory" to an honoring of self and one's journey. "The reason I am the individual that I am is because my perspective is not from the celebratory Broadway canon. The shows I've done are all unicorns — 'The Wiz'; 'Ain't Misbehavin''; 'The Full Monty'; 'Hadestown.' " And so he'll be singing "Believe In Yourself" from "The Wiz." He says he's been on a mission to make it a favorite in the canon. "It isn't celebratory in the sense of meter or tempo and that sort of thing. But it celebrates the individual who's making personal success in his life. It's sumptuous and self-actualizing. So I said to (Saint), 'Well, that's the kind of celebration we need during this period — tears of joy.’ " Laiona Michelle at George Street Playhouse's 2021 gala. (Photo: Photo by Michael Boylan) Burns had just flown from Los Angeles to start rehearsals for George Street's planned April 2020 East Coast premiere of "A Walk on the Moon" when the pandemic struck. The new musical is an adaptation of the same-named film, which Burns says was a favorite of hers growing up. She'll sing a number from the musical, which features a book and additional lyrics by Pamela Gray, with music and lyrics from Paul Scott Goodman. George Street plans to mount the production when theater returns. Pandemic silver linings. George Street's forward-looking gala has many not only enjoying the return to the stage, but considering the future. Broadway and the theater world also are going through a reckoning on systemic racism, equity, inclusion, social justice and more that has become more pressing over the course of the pandemic, and the hope largely is to return to a system changed for the better. De Shields calls this "a teaching moment." "Although industry-wide we paid lip service to diversity, equity and inclusion, this pandemic has forced us to put our art where our mouth is. So we now see specific changes being made in the structure of theater in New York. Because things that were not obvious to the civilian gaze became totally bald and apparent when there was a moratorium on theater activity. So I think we've got to come back more mature, more ecumenical." James N. Heston, chairperson of the George Street Playhouse Board of Trustees and recipient of the Thomas H. Kean Arts Advocacy Award. (Photo: Photo by Michael Boylan) Burns and Thornton also say they are hopeful for change. "Hopefully there will be really good changes implemented when we go back and things will be moving forward and getting better. And we'll be taking steps in more diverse and more inclusive ways and hopefully, we see a brighter future for the theater," Burns said. "I hope that we can take full advantage of the recognition of the change, and the real present awareness of that change," Thornton said. "I think that gives us the capacity to really flip the system on its head, and really try to uplift the historically disenfranchised, and just make our industry and really the world as a whole a far more inclusive and self-aware and loving place, and therefore the work will be that much better because of it, because we exist in a world of empathy. So the more empathetic and aware we are, the better our work is going to be." Returning to works. The time away also will inevitably change works. The pandemic shaped "A Walk on the Moon" in ways that otherwise may not have happened, Burns said. "I've talked to the director (Sheryl Kaller) and the writer, and they have actually, with what has been happening, have taken everything into account and are changing and adapting the story and their ideas are brilliant. Had we gone with it a year ago, the story would be a little different, and so I think in the end, it will all be for the better." Former Gov. Thomas H. Kean, recipient of the Thomas H. Kean Arts Advocacy Award. (Photo: Photo by Michael Boylan) "Company" on Broadway was just about to be frozen when the pandemic struck, Thornton said. "We were feeling really secure in the work we had created over those six weeks of rehearsals, and a couple of weeks of teching and the week or so we had done previews. But you can't just replicate and re-create what was done before," he said. "We're all going to be vastly different individuals and human beings coming back." Andre De Shields performed for George Street Playhouse's 2021 gala. (Photo: Photo by Lia Chang) While he says the universal truths of "Company" will always stay the same, "what we all bring to that world I think is going to be hopefully far more enlightened and self-aware. I'm just excited for us all to be in the space to explore those ideas together and make whatever this new version of 'Company' will be." De Shields says Broadway's return — expected in the fall — will come right at the start of what is traditionally the low point in the season, and will be a "hard row to hoe." But he says, "I'm ready to get back to the discipline of eight shows a week, the appreciative audiences and particularly 'Hadestown,' which I think is a piece of entertainment for the changing zeitgeist." De Shields, who has been working throughout the pandemic, said what he hopes to impart to people about rough times like these are to always seek out the positives, which in his case meant the flexibility to tackle projects like NBC's "New Amsterdam," which would have been impossible with a full Broadway schedule, as well as larger meanings. "When I have these opportunities to talk, especially to the young people, I say to them, 'When we are faced with these difficult situations, these complications, these problems, don't act in panic. Don't react in fear. Always understand that somewhere at the core of the complication is a gift, is a blessing.' And what we need to do is uncover that blessing and understand while on the surface it looks like only a problem but way down deep there's a vein of gold for us to mine." Thomas F. Kelso, Esq., chairperson of the New Brunswick Cultural Center and recipient of the Thomas H. Kean Arts Advocacy Award. (Photo: Photo by Michael Boylan) Gala tickets are $400 and can be purchased at georgestreetplayhouse.org. Up next in George Street's 2021 streaming season is "Tiny Beautiful Things," adapted by Oscar-nominated writer Nia Vardalos from the best- selling novel by Cheryl Strayed, which was based on the "Dear Sugar" advice column. Michelle stars in the production, alongside John Bolger, Kally Duling and Ryan George. "It was so healing for me to be with my peers and to be with a director (Saint) with a vision, a clear vision, and then also to have gorgeous material to work with," she said. "Everything was selected so carefully, the entire season was selected perfectly, you get a little bit of everything that we've missed along the way, everything we all have a taste for in our lives, things that connect us. Our spirits have been aching for and it was so much fun to do it, so satisfying." Dressing Like David From Schitt’s Creek Made Me Want To Burn My Wardrobe. In Elite Daily's I Tried series, we put celebrities’ favorite products, recipes, and routines to the test to show you what living like your fave star is really like. In this piece, we dress like David Rose from Schitt’s Creek . Schitt’s Creek is one of those shows you can’t help but love more and more with every rewatch. The series — which follows Johnny (Eugene Levy), Moira (Catherine O'Hara), David (Dan Levy), and Alexis (Annie Murphy) — taught viewers everything from how to find yourself when you hit rock bottom to the sheer fact that selling unpasteurized milk is illegal. Some people connect to the friendships (shouts to David and Stevie), some to the self-realizations (hi, Alexis), and some to the love stories (looking at you, Patrick and David). But for me? My most recent rewatch has drawn me to one thing and one thing only: the fashion. In particular, how David Rose dresses in the series. Everyone on the show has their thing . Moira never leaves her house without a wig and Alexis is down to do community service in heels. For David, it’s his signature look: dark colors, lots of layers, and a facial expression that says, “please don’t talk to me unprovoked,” — the latter of which I can completely relate to. As more Americans receive their coronavirus vaccinations and leaving the house becomes safer, I figured now was the perfect time to switch up my own personal aesthetic. While I usually spend my time in pajama bottoms and free T-shirts from college as opposed to designer labels like the sassiest Rose, I figured infusing some of David’s style into my lewk could be a fun way to change things up. After pulling out just about everything in my closet, I put together a few looks David would (maybe) be proud of. Look 1: Classic David. When you think “David Rose,” chances are visions of skirts over pants, bold sweaters, and over-the-top sunglasses dance in your head. To really test out David’s fashion, I figured it was best to go all in and recreate his most iconique ‘fit. In one of the main promo photos for Schitt’s Creek , David rocks a black skirt over black pants, a black and white sweater, and some Willy Wonka-esque glasses. While I didn’t have the exact pieces David wore, I got pretty close with leggings, a black skirt, a cropped sweater, and some sunnies I got for free as a promotional gift from my old apartment complex (#connected). I decided to get some use out of my look by wearing it to walk my dog to a nearby restaurant to pick up dinner. As I marched down the street, I felt more like I was in an Avril Lavigne music video than a character from a TV show. When I stood in line at the window to grab my food, I expected people to whisper and stare, but no one gave me a second glance. By the time I got back home, I was hungry and overheated from the sweater, but felt a little more confident about dressing like a Rose. Look 2: Casual David. Even when David Rose is dressing casually, he’s still got a whole aesthetic going on. As someone who usually just grabs whatever shorts and T- shirts are within reach, I was excited to actually try to pull his everyday look together. Luckily, it easy enough to emulate with chunky sweaters, tight pants, high socks, and Converse, all of which I already had in my closet. After pulling out a black-and-white sweater and sweatpants, I felt David AF as I walked down the street for an iced coffee. Unfortunately, I live in Florida, and considering it was the middle of a scorching May afternoon when I decided to test out David’s style, things got hot — and not in a cute way. Just a few minutes into my stroll, sweat was already pouring down my back, and I could tell some blisters were forming around my pinkie toe from the shoes. I decided walking all the way to the coffee shop (about 20 minutes one way) would be a big mistake, so I pulled a move David would be proud of: I went home and paid an extra $10 to have the coffee delivered after calling my mom to complain how hot I was. Look 3: David’s Kilts. One of David’s most famous looks involves paring a kilt with an array of loose, boxy pieces. While David is known for his kilts, I didn’t exactly have traditional Scottish duds lying around my house. In order to pull off this ‘fit, I decided a pleated skirt, a sweater, and some sneakers were as close as I was going to get. Since I didn’t really have anywhere to go while decked out David-style, used the outfit as an excuse to drink a mimosa in the middle of the afternoon in my backyard. For pictures! For content! For fashion! While I felt a little more like I was an outsider on Gossip Girl as opposed to the owner of a hip apothecary, I couldn’t deny: This was a whole look. Sure, I hated it and felt like I looked like an old-timey blacksmith, but it was definitely unlike anything I had ever put together before. Look 4: The Amish Field. In Season 2, Episode 1, the Rose family finds David camping out with an Amish community after he flees Schitt’s Creek. While it was an unusual scene on its own — he hides out in the pasture as an Amish woman tries to do her work — the vision of David, crouched in a field and holding a pitchfork while wearing a fuzzy hoodie and oversized shades, will forever live rent-free in my mind. While going anywhere with a pitchfork in public is probably a crime, I figured the least I could do was throw on David’s Amish getaway outfit for a few pics in my yard. After digging out my heaviest jacket, I spent about 45 minutes in the shed in my backyard, looking for a pitchfork. While I didn’t have anything quite as dramatic (considering my job involves typing on a computer and not, you know, farm work), I did find a sinister- looking rake that seemed just old enough to complete my look. As I couched outside, sweating through my jacket and clutching my rake, I could see my husband watching me through the window, a look of concern and horror on his face. As soon as I went inside, I immediately threw my sweat-soaked jacket in the washing machine and acted like I had never seen the rake when my husband suggested we do some yard work the next morning. Final Thoughts. While I had a lot of fun channeling the Schitt’s Creek fashionista, ultimately, David Rose’s style definitely isn’t for me. I like wearing items that are a little more colorful and form-fitting versus baggier and darker. That said, branching out from my normal style definitely reminded me that fashion doesn't need to be taken so seriously. I can play around with styles and looks and if I don’t like it, so what? At the end of the day, it’s a way to express my feelings. The next time I feel like living out my Schitt’s Creek dreams, I might throw on a wig or say “ew” instead of dressing like David. He might be the king of sassy comments, but when it comes to style, I think I’ll stick to my own aesthetic. I lost my job over a Facebook post - was that fair? When Rachel Burns posted a photo of a singalong at work on her Facebook page, she had no idea that her actions would end her career. The BBC's Laurence Grissell has been following her story for the past year. "I absolutely loved my job. It's my vocation, I love caring for people," Rachel says. For 21 years, until December 2015, Rachel worked at Park Hall, a residential care home for elderly people and vulnerable adults in Reigate, southern England. She'd started there as care assistant, and worked her way up. She'd been the manager for the last eight years. "There were always activities going on. I wanted the clients to have a decent quality of life." One of the activities that Rachel organised for the residents at Park Hall was a regular music night, every Friday. "We'd put flowers on the tables," Rachel says. "The residents would all get dressed up and we'd have a different supper every week." As a keen amateur singer, Rachel would perform at the music nights, everything from Roberta Flack and Nina Simone to Boney M. "The staff would get up dancing with the residents. You'd see smiles on their faces - it really was such a lovely thing to see." One Friday Rachel returned home after music night and decided to share some of the special moments from the evening online. "I was quite elated at how the night had gone," Rachel says. "I posted the picture thinking that it would just be seen by a few people, mainly staff, on Facebook." But two months later Rachel got a phone call summoning her to head office. "As soon as I got there, when I saw their faces, I knew I was in big trouble." Rachel had done four things wrong. She'd posted the photo on Facebook, she'd identified a Park Hall resident in the photo - a man with Down's syndrome who, eager to be photographed, had jumped into the shot beside her - she had also posted a video of the music night, and she was Facebook friends with a relative of one of the residents. These were all breaches of Surrey County Council policy. Two days later Rachel was suspended from her job. From the word go, Rachel held her hands up and admitted all the council's allegations but nonetheless wanted to appeal against their decision. "I know I shouldn't have put that picture up there, but should I really have had my career of 21 years taken away for one mistake? I wanted justice because I didn't believe what they had done to me was fair." Find out more. Rachel told her story to Laurence Grissell on Radio 4's The Untold. Rachel lost her appeal and was given just two days to decide whether she would accept demotion - with a significant pay cut - or face dismissal. She asked for extra time to consider her options, but the council refused. Instead, Rachel, who by now had been signed off with stress and anxiety, received a telephone call demanding that she come to a decision immediately. "I said, 'I'm off work sick, my doctor doesn't feel I can make such a life-changing decision at the moment.'" But Rachel was told if she didn't accept the demotion she would be dismissed from her £45,000 a year job, with immediate effect. "I got a letter the next day which said, 'I'm sorry you have decided to accept dismissal.' And that was it." Claire Pooley's brother is the Park Hall resident in the photo that Rachel posted on Facebook. Claire says her brother loves to be the centre of attention and loves to share photographs of himself with the rest of his family. The Friday music nights were the highlight of his week. "He loves singing and dancing," Claire says, "Rachel and the guys allowed him to just blossom on a Friday evening. "The moment we walked in the door we knew Park Hall was a special place," Claire's husband Graham continues. "The atmosphere, the culture and the behaviour - people were happy there and had a lot of stimulation." The couple say that the Park Hall staff always encouraged Claire's brother to get up and sing at the music nights. "He would practise and get ready for it - although he sang the same three songs every week," Graham says. "We loved watching him - it brought him alive, it was wonderful." Neither Claire nor Graham feel that Rachel should have been fired for posting the photo of Claire's brother. "None of us had a problem with it - gross misconduct or not," Claire says. "After 21 years is it appropriate to sack the manageress who's created a culture and environment at this special home in the way that they have?" asks Graham. "The answer is no, it's not." It's autumn 2016 and Rachel has decided to take Surrey County Council to an employment tribunal for unfair dismissal. "They have to understand that this is my life that we're talking about here," she says. "I want my career back." A preliminary hearing date is set for early November. But she can't afford any formal legal representation and so is planning to face the council's barristers with only the help of her close friend, the Reverend David Walford, a retired healthcare chaplain who's never done anything like this before and admits he's out of his comfort zone. "I'm very happy to stand up in front of people," David says. "What I'm not sure of is facing people who have had a lifetime's career in legal work." David was at Park Hall on the evening that the photo was taken. Like Rachel, he's a singer and would perform at the Friday night music shows. "I've seen a lot of care homes in my time as a parish clergyman and as a hospital chaplain. I knew the difference between what I'd usually see and Park Hall. Care with love, not care out of duty - that's what Rachel was giving. The thought that Rachel was being taken out of that actually brought me to tears." To make matters worse, Rachel's husband Gary is very unwell. "He's had the brain tumour for four years," Rachel says. "He was very healthy, but he walks with a stick now." Not only is Gary unable to work, but without a reference Rachel can't find a new job. She and Gary are racking up huge debts living off their credit cards, but she hopes her money worries will be sorted out once the case is resolved, with any luck out of court. Two weeks before the date of the preliminary hearing Rachel is doing an unpaid gig at a local pub. She's on stage singing Stuck In The Middle With You by Stealers Wheel and urging the punters to get up on the dance floor. "It's just so much stress, it's crazy," Rachel says later, "which is why nights like this are brilliant, just to let off some steam." The day of the preliminary hearing in Croydon arrives. Rachel, who always believed the case would be settled out of court, says she never thought in a million years it would come to this. She's nervous. "I've got to stand up against one of Surrey's senior solicitors to defend myself when I made one mistake in a 21-year career. They have crucified me." The judge sets a date for a full hearing, but it's seven months away, at the start of June. Then, out of the blue, towards the end of December, Rachel receives a settlement offer from the council. For a couple of days, she considers accepting the £7,500, before having a change of heart. "It was a joke, an absolute joke," Rachel says. "And it's not even about money now, it's about showing them for what they are." With the case dragging on, Rachel is really feeling the strain. She is anxious and depressed. So much is at stake - by now, she and Gary are in dire straits. Their debts are mounting, and they're seven months in arrears with the rent on the house in Reigate that they share with their border collie, Bramble. "We are scraping pennies, literally pennies," she says. "It's never-ending, it never goes away. "All I did was put up a picture of a client enjoying their life in the care home that I loved working in," she says, beginning to cry. By June 2017 the couple are at breaking point. They have no money in the bank and no savings to fall back on. Rachel is fearful that they're going to lose everything, including the roof over their heads. "It just goes to show that when you think you have everything it can be snatched away from you just like that, for one mistake," she says. The trial is taking its toll on David, too. He's exhausted. "This case has just become monstrous," he says. Two days before the tribunal is due to start Rachel decides that she's packing it in, she can't go on. Her husband Gary pleads with her for almost three hours not to walk away now. This isn't the first time Rachel's doubted the wisdom of continuing with the case. "This case has destroyed her," Gary explains. "She has no confidence any more, she doesn't sleep any more, we argue much more now. It's been disastrous. "I've had to watch my wife slowly falling apart, because of what they've done to her." Finally, in early June, in a rundown corner of West Croydon, Rachel's employment tribunal gets under way. She has given evidence and a number of witnesses have spoken and been questioned. But two days into the proceedings the judge has to adjourn the hearing when Rachel becomes very distressed. "It just got too much," she says. "I thought, 'You've broken me to the point where I don't have the self-esteem at the moment to go back into management.' And it's such a shame. I said I was sorry, I told the judges the absolute truth." The case finally concludes but without any decision. Rachel will have to wait another seven weeks for an answer. It's the beginning of August 2017, nearly 20 months since Rachel was first suspended from her job, and she has some exciting news. "I won! Oh, my God, I won!" The court has upheld her claim of unfair dismissal. The judge decides that Surrey County Council's decision to demote Rachel was within the band of reasonable responses, given that she'd admitted the allegations against her. But she concludes that the timescale the council gave Rachel to decide whether she would accept redeployment or face dismissal - just two working days - wasn't long enough. This procedural aspect, she says, was a fundamental flaw. "Justice has prevailed!" Rachel says. "It's amazing that if you believe in something and you know your worth you just keep going. You keep going, and going and going." But Rachel will have to return to the employment tribunal on 13 November for a remedy hearing at which the court will decide how much she should be given in compensation. She has no idea how much that's likely to be but fears that the sum will be reduced because she admitted the allegations against her. She and Gary now have debts to the tune of about £50,000 and are 14 months in arrears with their rent, and although Rachel now has a reference from Surrey County Council, it states that she was fired for serious misconduct, so the prospect of her finding work is still uncertain. "As a manager myself I wouldn't look very favourably on that candidate," she says. Despite the win, going back to work will be a struggle. Before losing her job two years ago, Rachel had been signed off with stress, and she still suffers from anxiety and depression. Meanwhile the job she loved has gone forever. Park Hall closed its doors on 30 June as part of Surrey County Council's plans to shut down all six care homes it owned and ran. The residents were rehomed. "I really loved Park Hall," Rachel says. "It was like a family to me more than going to work."