Shmiras Halashon Elementary

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February 2019 Elementary Shmiras Halashon —Study Guide—

The elementary Shmiras Halashon examination is based on the book Chofetz Chaim A Lesson A Day By Rabbi Shimon Finkelman and Rabbi Yitzchak Berkowitz, covering the entire 25-page overview and selected sections from the remainder of the book. The overview discusses many concepts of proper speech in depth. The numbered pages alternate between the specific halachos and the concepts of proper speech.

The examination contains two parts evaluating your knowledge of the concepts and halachos of Shmiras Halashon.

1. Concepts of Shmiras Halashon There are 30 multiple choice questions and 10 short answer questions (from a choice of 13). Both types of questions cover in detail the concepts discussed in the overview and the odd numbered pages from Days 1–93 and 150–178. This section is worth 50% of the final grade.

2. Halachos of Shmiras Halashon There are 30 multiple choice questions and 10 short answer questions (from a choice of 13). Both types of questions cover in detail the halachos discussed in the even numbered pages from Days 1–50, 91–109, 118–148, 158–174, and 178. This section is worth 50% of the final grade. NOTE: The answers that you give must be found in the syllabus. There may be other correct answers to a question, but they do not receive credit on the examination.

This Study Guide is the property of TAL and MUST be returned after you take the exam. Failure to do so is an aveirah of gezel.

In this Study Guide you will find the syllabus and a sample Shmiras Halashon examination for you to try (page 31). Please utilize the sample to familiarize yourself with the type of questions that are asked, and for guidance as to how to answer them.

Time: You will have two hours to complete the formal examination.

NOTE: a. Since you are required to answer in black ink, be sure to bring a black pen to your exam. b. Accustom yourself to outlining your answers on scrap paper and writing essays clearly. Illegible exams will not be graded. c. The lowest passing score on this exam is 70. You will not get credit for a score below 70, though in the case of a failed or illegible paper, you may be able to retake the exam after waiting six months. Grades for transcripts are calculated as follows: A = 90–100% B = 80–89% C = 70–79%

Elementary Shmiras Halashon —Topic Syllabus: Concepts—

The Conceptual Topic Syllabus leads you through the book Chofetz Chaim A Lesson A Day, indicating the notes on the right-handed pages that you are required to learn (Sefer Shmiras Halashon). The first section of this syllabus covers the book pages xxi–xlv. Except for the opening paragraphs, the overview is divided according to sub-titles in the margin of the page, such as Take Hold of Life (page xxiii). The topic questions below are referenced according to these subtitles. NOTE: You should be aware that the source book overview often cites pesukim (indented in italics). These pesukim are ALWAYS relevant to the sections which follow — not to the previous sections. Nevertheless, the marginal sub-titles are printed below these pesukim, next to the subsequent text. As you progress through the syllabus, completing the overview and starting the body of the book, you may notice that the bulk of the book is organized according to the daily shmiras halashon learning program, and is not split into content-based sub-sections. In order to aid your studying, the syllabus follows the order of the book (referencing the day numbers in square brackets in the left-hand column), while adding subtitles, e.g., The Importance of Shmiras Halashon (Day 1). These subtitles do not appear in the book A Lesson A Day; their aim is purely to help you mentally organize and categorize the study material conceptually. The subtitles and corresponding topic questions appear in the right-hand column of the syllabus.

Page Conceptual Topic An Overview / The Beauty of Shmiras Halashon [xxi] Opening Section (untitled); Take Hold of Life Overview: These two sections discuss the nature of speech and the importance of proper speech. What is the essential goal (or “plan”) of the halachos of shmiras halashon? What is unique about the nature of the tongue, and why might Hashem have made it like this? How do the halachos help us better perceive and relate to others? Which negative character traits are usually the source of hurtful words? What are the usual social consequences of such words? For what positive purposes was speech intended — in our relationship to others, to the world (“spiritually”), and to Hashem? [xxiii] Inside Lashon Hara Overview: This section discusses how a person’s thoughts and character traits affect his speech. What negative character traits lead to hurtful words and lashon hara? What positive character traits lead to kind words? How did Chovos Halevavos describe the mouth, and why? [xxiv] To See Good; Getting There Overview: These sections develop the above ideas and show how good speech positively affects our character traits and thoughts. How does seeing good promote shmiras halashon, and how does shmiras halashon promote seeing good? How do the halachos of shmiras halashon make us into better people? [xxv] The Binding Thread Overview: This section shows how shmiras halashon is Hashem’s prerequisite for having a relationship with His people.

Page Conceptual Topic How is Hashem’s love of the Jewish people dependent on the way they interact with each other? How did the ketores used in the Beis Hamikdash symbolize this? [xxv] The Essence of Speech; A Bridge Between Heaven and Earth Overview: These sections discuss how Jews use speech to serve Hashem. Why is a Jew defined by the way in which he uses his mouth? How can he use his words to imbue the world with kedushah? How do forbidden words prevent him achieving his purpose? Why is the choice to speak or refrain from speaking lashon hara really a choice between whether to exercise one’s G-dly self or earthly self? [xxvii] Redefining Reality Overview: This section discusses how words affect the world around us. How do words — as opposed to mere thoughts — redefine reality? [xxviii] Tied Up in Court; “Judge Your Fellow Man Favorably” Overview: These sections discuss the effects of lashon hara in Heaven. How does lashon hara enable Satan to accuse the person discussed? Why is Satan also allowed to accuse the speaker and listener? (See Days 13–14.) What happens in Shamayim when one Jew judges another Jew favorably? (See Days 98–99.) Words: A Study in Contrasts [xxxi] Words Move Worlds; Words Can Unravel One’s Torah and Mitzvos Overview: These sections discuss the great harm caused by lashon hara and the reward for shmiras halashon. What does lashon hara have to do with the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash? How does the mitzvah of shmiras halashon lead to the building of the new Beis Hamikdash?

Page Conceptual Topic [xxxii] How does lashon hara affect a person’s Torah and mitzvos? What happens to a person’s mitzvos when he speaks lashon hara? (See Day 17.) How is a person who refrains from speaking lashon hara rewarded? [xxxiv] The View from Within…; Words Have a Profound Affect on Others Overview: These sections discuss how words alter people’s lives. How does lashon hara destroy people’s lives (both external aspects as well as self-image)? How does shmiras halashon better people’s lives? [xxxvi] Words are a Barometer of Ego; Words Imbue Children… Overview: These sections discuss how lashon hara reflects intolerance and how it bequeaths this attitude to one’s children. Shmiras Halashon does the opposite. What beliefs fuel lashon hara or conversely shmiras halashon? How does hearing lashon hara, and in contrast shmiras halashon, affect children’s outlook on life? [xxxvii] Words Define One’s Relationship to Oneself; Words Determine How Others See Us Overview: These sections discuss how lashon hara hurts the speaker. Shmiras halashon does the opposite. How does lashon hara demean the speaker and lead to his own unhappiness? How does shmiras halashon refine the speaker and bring him lasting happiness? How does lashon hara distance the speaker from his friends, and how does shmiras halashon bring him closer to them? [xxxix] Words Reveal or Obscure the Divine Image in Man (There are no topic questions associated with this subtitle.)

Page Conceptual Topic Lashon Hara: A Well-Stocked Arsenal; Other Prohibited Speech Overview: These sections define and describe the issurim concerning improper speech. What is the technical (or “narrow”) definition oflashon hara? What is the definition of rechilus? What is the literal meaning of the term, and how does it bring animosity between people? What is the definition ofmotzi shem ra? How does it differ from lashon hara? What is the definition of ona’as devarim? What other forms of speech should be avoided? The Road to Peace and Unity Overview: The following sections primarily discuss the benefits and rewards for shmiras halashon. [xlii] Strengthening the Bond How can a Jew form a deeper bond with Hashem through shmiras halashon?

[xliii] The Ultimate Blessing (There are no topic questions associated with this subtitle.)

“Seek Peace And Pursue It” What is the ultimate berachah that every person seeks? How does shmiras halashon help achieve it? (See Days 31–32.) [xliv] Kindness Through Words What is “lashon tov,” and what advantage does it have over other forms of chessed? [xlv] “One Who Has Compassion For Others…” How does shmiras halashon open Hashem’s “store of mercy”?

Day Conceptual Topic Days 1–93 [1] Introduction: The Importance of Shmiras Halashon How do the positive and negative mitzvos correspond to man’s “spiritual organs and sinews” which makeup his neshamah? How do mitzvos or aveiros affect these “spiritual organs”? (Days 1 and 2 are best understood when read together.) [2] How does Targum Onkelos translate the pasuk, “and man became a living being”? Why? What happens to a person’s “power of speech” and, indeed, to his neshamah’s “essential quality” in Olam Haba when he speaks lashon hara? [3] Introduction: Sefer Shmiras Halashon What two sefarim did the Chofetz Chaim author? What subjects do they address, and why? [4] What is the correct balance between learning the halachos of the Torah and learning aggadah and mussar? [5] Strengthening Ourselves Against the Yeitzer Hara’s Arguments What two arguments does the yetzer hara use to dissuade us from acquiring the quality of shmiras halashon? (Days 6–8 answer the first argument, and Day 9 answers the second argument.) [6] According to the Vilna Gaon, what is the reward for refraining from speaking that which is forbidden? How should we pursue spiritual goals? [7] How should we react to our failures to avoid lashon hara? What advice does the Gemara (Berachos [5a]) give us, and why? [8] What should someone do to inspire himself in the afternoon after speaking lashon hara in the morning? What mashal teaches us this? [9] What should we learn from our approach to material matters, and apply to spiritual matters?

Day Conceptual Topic [10] Speech is the Key to Success or Failure How does refraining from lashon hara enable a person to observe large numbers of mitzvos and avoid many aveiros? (See Days 176–177.) [11] Why is the reward for Torah equivalent to all the mitzvos, and the punishment for lashon hara equivalent to all aveiros? [12] The Principle of “Measure for Measure” What principle determines how Hashem acts toward man? [13] How does lashon hara bring suffering upon the Jewish people? [14] How is it possible that a Jew, or the Jewish people, can go unpunished for terrible aveiros such as avodah zarah? (See Day 19.) [15] The Severity of Lashon Hara What makes the sin of lashon hara so severe? [16] How is a person punished for lashon hara? What determines if a man is superior or inferior to other creatures? [17] How does lashon hara cause a person to lose his Torah and mitzvos? [18] To which aveiros is lashon hara considered equivalent? [19] Where in Jewish history do we see the terrible power of lashon hara? [20] What is the Hashem’s response to lashon hara? [21] Why is lashon hara akin to denial of Hashem? [22] Enhancing the Sanctity of One’s Limud HaTorah and Tefillah How does a Jew perfect the “tools” of his trade? [23] How does shmiras halashon or lashon hara affect the power of our mitzvos? [24] Why does a metzora need others to daven for him? (See Day 39.) [25] How does lashon hara affect our ability to daven to Hashem? [26] Whose limud haTorah sustains the world, and why?

Day Conceptual Topic [27] How does lashon hara affect the study of Torah? [28] How can we learn from the business world as to what our attitude to lashon hara should be? [29] How does lashon hara cause a person to lose the merit of his Torah? [30] The Rewards for Shmiras Halashon What do we learn from the command to throw treifah meat to dogs? [31] The Importance of Peace How does shmiras halashon bring peace? [32] Where in the Torah do we see that the truth was altered for the sake of peace? [33] What happens when we greet others with peace? [34] In what situations should we pursue peace, and how? What do we learn from Moshe about pursuing peace? [35] Why do Shabbos candles take precedence over Kiddush wine? [36] In what zechus did Bnei Yisrael receive the Torah? [37] In what situation do we see Hashem permit His Name to be erased? What do we learn from this? [38] Who is a talmid of Aharon, and what is his reward? Why were the two men in the marketplace destined for Olam Haba? [39] The Punishment of Tzara’as: 1. The Affliction Why did the metzora have to live in isolation? [40] What were the different forms of tzara’as? How and why did it progress from one form to the next? [41] Why does tzara’as not manifest on a person’s body today? [42] What will happen in Olam Haba to a habitual speaker of lashon hara? [43] Why are those who habitually speak lashon hara punished with poverty?

Day Conceptual Topic [44] The Punishment of Tzara’as: 2. Miriam’s Affliction Why, according to the Ramban, does the Torah publicize how Miriam was punished with tzara’as? What lessons can we learn from the incident? [45] What was so severe about a metzora’s punishment? How did a metzora rid himself of his tzara’as? (The four factors which we must remember in the episode of Miriam’s affliction are answered in Days 45–47) [46] Why should we specifically remember that it was Miriam who was punished? Why would we have expected Hashem to have overlooked her remarks? Why should we specifically remember where she was punished? [47] Why was the sin of the meraglim considered so grievous? [48] What is the best medicine for the neshamah, and why? [49] Chet HaMeraglim What are two of the approaches that the yetzer hara uses to entice people to sin? [50] Why did the meraglim despair of conquering the Land and then resort to slandering it? [51] How did the words: “But do not rebel against Hashem” counter the meraglim’s contention? [52] What lesson can we learn from this episode about what Hashem expects from us? [53] More Punishments for Speaking Lashon Hara From where do we learn that one who has spoken lashon hara is fit to be stoned? [54] In which ‘world’ are speakers of lashon hara punished? What terrible end awaits them? [55] What will happen to habitual speakers of lashon hara in acharis hayamim? What punishments befall the community because of such people?

Day Conceptual Topic [56] Why are speakers of lashon hara not allowed to stand in the presence of the Shechinah? How does Hashem ‘record’ the words that a person utters? [57] For what types of speech is a person punished? Which ‘craft’ (i.e., profession) should everyone engage in? (See Day 85.) [58] Gossip: 1. Rejecting Gossip How should a person react on hearing that someone has spoken against him? What will inevitably happen if he does not do this? [59] Why do speakers of lashon hara lack credibility? [60] How does the story of Yeravam ben Yoash teach us the great zechus of rejecting lashon hara as false? [61] Gossip: 2. Gossip in the Beis Hamidrash and Beis Haknesses How do gossipmongers behave toward those known to refrain from listening to lashon hara? What advice does the Chofetz Chaim give to the head of a family? [62] What are the benefits of refraining from engaging in any conversation while in a beis hamidrash or beis haknesses? [63] What aveiros can one transgress by speaking lashon hara during kerias haTorah? [64] Gossip: 3. The Sin of Causing Others to Speak Lashon Hara Why is causing another to sin — such as by telling him lashon hara — considered worse than killing him? [65] How does the mashal of the swindler prove false the speaker’s rationalization, “But the listener enjoyed the lashon hara!”? [66] How many are ‘killed’ by the speaker of lashon hara? How are those who join the gossipmonger’s group punished? [67] Gossip: 4. Avoiding Gossipers How should someone who has caused others to speak lashon hara start improving his ways?

Day Conceptual Topic [68] Why should one flee from a group of idle chatterers? [69] What is the lesson to be learned from the mashal about the arrested man? [70] Strife: 1. A Terrible Sin What are some of the aveiros that usually accompany a feud? What are the two reasons that usually draw people into feuds? [71] How do we see from the incident of Korach the great destructiveness of strife? [72] ‘Who’ is the one who incites strife? [73] Why was the generation of Enosh spared (despite their avodah zarah), while the generation of the Mabbul were not? [74] What are the ultimate results of strife? [75] Strife: 2. Quarrelling With Torah Scholars How is a person who disparages a Torah scholar punished? [76] To what does the Gemara compare arguing against one’s teacher of Torah? [77] Strife: 3. Parties to a Feud How does a feuding parent bring harm upon his family? [78] What should one do if he finds himself embroiled in feud? Why? [79] What mitzvas lo sa’aseh does a person transgress by maintaining a dispute? How are those who support a party in a feud punished? [80] From which animals are korbanos brought, and why? Why should one refrain from assisting in a feud? What should one think about to motivate oneself to not get involved? [81, 83] What should a son do when his father gets involved in a feud? Why? [82] In what zechus were the sons of Korach saved from their father’s terrible punishment?

Day Conceptual Topic [83] Strife: 4. Seeking Peace From which episode in the Torah do we learn that one must do everything in one’s power to resolve a feud peacefully, even if one party is clearly wrong? [84] Regarding a feud, for how long should one pursue peace? If one cannot influence the prime quarrelers to make peace, to where should one turn one’s attention? [85] The Quality of Silence Why is silence a precious quality to acquire? Why did R’ Yitzchak compare it to a craft? [86] Why does a person deserve to be a mute for speaking forbidden words? How can this thought motivate us to refrain from such speech? [87] Why is it better to study the halachos than to simply remain silent? Can we ever relax our vigilance? [88] What did Shimon ben Rabban Gamliel mean when he said that he found nothing better than silence? [89] What are the benefits of the quality of silence? How is the tongue more powerful than the sword? What is alluded to by the fact that we have two eyes, ears, etc. but only one mouth? [90] Why is silence referred to as a “protective fence” for speech? [91] Making Conversation What guidelines does the Chofetz Chaim give for conversing with others? Can one praise one storekeeper in front of another, or even mention his name? [92] What should one do if there is a possibility that a conversation will lead to lashon hara? How should one motivate oneself regarding this? [93] Can one associate with a group that contains just one sinner? What should one do if one finds oneself in a gathering of sinners?

Day Conceptual Topic NOTE: The elementary examination has no questions on Days 94–149; these days are covered in the advanced examination. Days 150–178 [150] Lashon Hara and Limud Hatorah How can a person nullify the zechus of his Torah and mitzvos without even realizing it? [151] How can it be that a person can learn Torah and daven with kavanah yet be no better than a “lazy man”? [152] What is the way to rectify the aveirah of speaking lashon hara? How does the tongue differ from man’s other limbs, and hence, what is the way to prevent one sinning with it? [153] The Kelalah of Lashon Hara vs. the Berachah of Shmiras Halashon Why is it that when a person “contaminates himself a little” it follows that “they contaminate him a great deal”, but when a person “sanctifies himself a little” then “they sanctify him a great deal”? [154] Who was the first to slander, and what was the result? Why do people hate gossipmongers? [155] What should a person do if he wants material success? Why? [156] Performing Mitzvos: 1. Yiras Hashem and Striving to Perform Every Mitzvah Why is yiras Hashem necessary for someone who wants to guard his tongue? How should he pursue such yirah? [157] Why must limud haTorah be accompanied by yiras Hashem? [158] What difference is there between the reward or punishment for mitzvos that are bein adam leMakom and mitzvos that are bein adam lechaveiro? What should one do to ensure a ‘good life’ in Olam Hazeh and Olam Haba? [159] Why must one strive to perform each and every mitzvah without exception?

Day Conceptual Topic [160] What must a Jew believe in to be considered a ‘believer in Hashem’? Why then do some Jews habitually transgress some commandments? Why were the two Luchos identical? [161] Performing Mitzvos: 2. Hillel’s Message What fundamental message about the difference between spiritual and material accomplishment did Hillel teach with his maxim (Avos [1:14])? [162] Why does a wise man dedicate every moment to avodas Hashem? [163] How can a person ensure that he will receive reward not only for his limud HaTorah but also for his efforts at earning a livelihood? [164] What lesson do we learn regarding our spiritual obligations from the comparison of our time in this world to “market day”? [165] Why is it foolish for people to convince themselves that there will be time in their old age for spiritual pursuits, while meanwhile they spend their younger years ‘enjoying’ life? (This Day is an explanation of Hillel’s words: “And if not now, when?”) [166] Performing Mitzvos: 3. Shmiras Halashon and Torah How does shmiras halashon save a person from transgressing thousands of aveiros each year, and earn him thousands of mitzvos? What is the reward for refraining from a sin such as lashon hara? How can one purify oneself from ‘the morass of sin’? [167] Why is the Torah likened to bread? What should be done if extenuating circumstances force one to cancel one’s daily study session? [168] Performing Mitzvos: 4. Dedication to the Mitzvos of Shmiras Halashon What are the advantages of being dedicated to one mitzvah? [169] How do mitzvos become akin to a meis mitzvah? Why is shmiras halashon a meis mitzvah and, hence, what is the reward for those who fulfill it? [170] How do we see that shmiras halashon has become a meis mitzvah?

Day Conceptual Topic [171] How do we know that a gossiper really does believe that every word of the Torah is true? Why is it fitting to choose shmiras halashon as the single mitzvah to which one dedicates oneself? [172] How can we bring about the coming of the Mashiach and building of the third Beis Hamikdash? [173] Reasons Why People Disregard Shmiras Halashon and the Importance of Teaching Them the Halachos Why is there widespread disregard for shmiras halashon? According to the Chofetz Chaim, how will people respond to those who attempt to guide them? What reward awaits such people? [174] How can we learn from our ancestors in Mitzrayim as to how to respond to enticements to sin? [175] According to the Ramban, what does the mitzvah to recall the episode of Miriam’s affliction obligate us to do? [176] The Mitzvos Associated With Lashon Hara How many negative mitzvos might be transgressed by speaking lashon hara? Be familiar with at least eight of them. [177] How many positive mitzvos might be transgressed by speaking lashon hara? Be familiar with at least six of them. [178] A Postscript: Everyone Must Learn About Shmiras Halashon What did R’ Yanai learn from the peddler? What do we learn from this about the need to learn the Chofetz Chaim’s sefarim?

Elementary Shmiras Halashon —Topic Syllabus: Halachah—

This section of the syllabus outline is divided into two parts, leading you through the book Chofetz Chaim A Lesson A Day, and indicating the halachos that you are required to learn.

Under each part heading (I. The Halachos of Lashon hara and II. The Halachos of Rechilus) in the following list, are subheadings which correspond to the small headings at the very top of the left-hand page in the source book, under “Sefer Chafetz Chaim.” For example, on page 52 (Day 2) of the book is the title, “LASHON HARA: Laws of Derogatory Speech.”

The day numbers in the cycle of daily shmiras halashon learning are recorded in square brackets in the left-hand column, and the corresponding halachic topics are in the right-hand column.

Day Halachic Topic I. The Halachos of Lashon hara (Days 1–50, 91–109, 117) LASHON HARA: Laws of Derogatory Speech Overview Days 2, 3, 5, and 12 deal with which types of statement are considered derogatory. Days 4, 6, and 8 explain that before determining if a statement is derogatory, one has to consider the circumstances of the subject as well as the opinions of the speaker and listener. Days 2, 3, 9, 10, 11, 16, (and 31) teach that most common justifications for speaking lashon hara are invalid. In Day 14 you learn the halachah regarding wicked people, and in Day 15 the halachos regarding the deceased and Eretz Yisrael. (The halachah regarding children is explained in Day 26). Day 17 explains how to do teshuvah for the sin of lashon hara.

Day Halachic Topic [1] Definition: What are the two basic categories of lashon hara? (These are dealt with separately below. Days 2–17 discuss derogatory speech and Days 18–28 discuss harmful speech. Days 29–32 discuss halachos which apply to both categories.) [2] Can one relate that someone is remiss in any aspect of Jewish observance? Does it help if the subject’s society commonly ignores that halachah? [3] Can one relate that someone lacks commitment regarding a particular mitzvah? Does it help if the speaker and listener also lack such commitment and would openly admit it? [4] Can a statement be derogatory in regard to one person but not in regard to another? [5] Can one relate that someone has a negative character trait? Is it permissible to say that someone is of “average character”? [6] Can one relate a statement which is technically not derogatory, but is considered so by the speaker or listener? [7] Can one relate that one does not like a lecturer’s oratory style? [8] Can one relate something about an individual’s past which is technically not derogatory, but is considered so by the speaker or listener — e.g., that someone is a baal teshuvah? [9] Does it help if the speaker mentions that he is guilty of the same thing, or if it is clear that he is not speaking out of malice? Can one relate negative information about loved ones? [10] Does it help if the subject does not mind or even gave permission to say the derogatory statement? Why is this so? [11] Does it help if the matter is already known to the listener or is common knowledge? Why is this so? (See Day 24.) Can one repeat or believe information written in newspapers? What if he has verified the information? [12] Can one say ambiguous statements which can be misinterpreted as derogatory? [13] What conditions must be satisfied to permit saying ambiguous statements?

Day Halachic Topic [14] Can one speak lashon hara about a rasha? What defines a person as such? [15] Can one speak lashon hara about the deceased or about Eretz Yisrael? What did the “wise man” say in response to his student’s comment and why? [16] Can one relate lashon hara to friends, family, or a spouse? [17] How should one do teshuvah for speaking lashon hara? LASHON HARA: Laws of Harmful Speech Overview Days 19–22 focus on why harmful statements are forbidden and which types of statement are considered such. Days 23–24 explain when such statements are in fact permissible. Day 25 details the halachah regarding wicked people, and Day 26 details the halachah regarding children. Days 27–28 describe how to do teshuvah for uttering harmful statements. [18] Definition: What type of speech, though not derogatory, is lashon hara? (See Day 1.) Does it matter that the damage was caused indirectly? [19] Can one relate information which, though not derogatory, the subject would find embarrassing? If a person is sensitive about being a baal teshuvah, does it help that the community highly respects such people? [20] Under what circumstances is it permissible to relate that someone is a baal teshuvah? [21] Can one relate information which, though not derogatory, might harm a person’s job or shidduch opportunities? [22] Why may one not make disparaging comments about products, a lecturer, or food? [23] Can one relate a potentially harmful statement if the subject does not object, or explicitly grants permission?

Day Halachic Topic [24] Can one relate a potentially harmful statement if the listener is already aware of the information? Can one relate a potentially harmful statement if it was originally heard in the presence of three people? Under what conditions? According to the Chofetz Chaim, can one relate a derogatory statement if it was originally heard in the presence of three people? [25] Can one relate a potentially harmful statement about a rasha? [26] Can one relate a derogatory or a potentially harmful statement about a child? How does this halachah apply to teachers? [27] How should one do teshuvah for uttering a harmful statement? What if no actual harm has resulted so far? [28] How should one do teshuvah for uttering a harmful statement if the victim does not know that he was harmed? LASHON HARA: General Rules Note: These halachos apply to both derogatory and harmful speech. All the issurim discussed here are ossur d’Oraisa, unlike avak lashon hara (discussed below) which is ossur d’Rabbanan. [29] In what way is it ossur to communicate lashon hara other than by speaking? [30] Does it help if no names are mentioned? What if a story reflects badly upon a group of people? [31] What is hotza’as shem ra (or motzi shem ra)? How is derogatory information which includes exaggerations or altered facts classified? [32] Can one relate for entertainment purposes an amusing incident which contains lashon hara? Avak Lashon Hara [33] What is avak lashon hara, and why is it forbidden? [34] Can one publicize a person’s hospitality or generosity?

Day Halachic Topic [35] Can one praise someone in the presence of another who is known to dislike him or in a large group? Can one praise a businessman in the presence of a competitor? What about excessive praise? [36] Can one say, “I’d rather not discuss So-and-so”? What should one say instead? [37] Can one relate negative information for a constructive purpose without telling the listener why he is saying what seems to be lashon hara? LASHON HARA: General Rules Bear in mind that these halachos apply to both derogatory and harmful speech. [38] What is a baal lashon hara? Why is his sin so great? Should one associate with him? [39] Are there any personal or practical reasons to justify speaking lashon hara? [40] Can a victim of lashon hara respond by speaking lashon hara? Laws of Toeles [41] What is the rationale for permitting derogatory speech said for a constructive purpose? (See Day 49 which clarifies that speaking lashon hara l’toeles is normally only relevant to derogatory speech and not to harmful speech.) [42] What are the four categories of constructive purposes? TOELES: Seven Conditions [43] Condition #1: What source of information must be used to speak lashon hara l’toeles? Condition #2: How should one evaluate whether a wrong was actually committed? [44] Is the chance of achieving the desired result relevant? (Remember that this halachah is in addition to the seven conditions.) [45] Condition #3: When must one reprove the sinner before speaking about him, and when not?

Day Halachic Topic [46] Condition #4: Assuming one is permitted to speak lashon hara l’toeles, what is one allowed to say? Do alternative means have to be pursued if available? [47] Condition #5: Are there any restrictions to what can be said l’toeles? [48] Condition #6: Is the intent of the speaker relevant? Why? [49] Condition #7: May one relate lashon hara l’toeles if the subject would be unduly harmed? [50] Summary. (Note that the seven points listed in the summary present the seven conditions mentioned above in a different order!) NOTE: The elementary examination has no questions on Days 51–90; these days are covered in the advanced examination. Listening to Lashon Hara [91] What issur d’Oraisa is violated by listening to lashon hara? What about if one merely pays attention to it? [92] What issur d’Oraisa is violated in the case of a lone listener? [93] What is required by the mitzvah to reprove? When is a listener required to reprove a speaker of lashon hara, and when not? How should reproof be given? [94] Is one required to reprove a group, and to what extent? What if one is in a community that disregards the issur of lashon hara? [95] What should one do on hearing lashon hara? (There are four possibilities.) [96] What should one do on hearing lashon hara from a parent or Rav? Is one required to reprove a child who speaks lashon hara? [97] Is one required to reprove a non-observant Jew who: (i) knowingly sins ?(מומר לתאבון) or (ii) sins due to temptation ;(מומר להכעיס) without concern Should one reprove someone with whom one has no relationship?

Day Halachic Topic TOELES: Constructive Listening Overview Days 98–101 deal with halachos about listening to negative information which is relevant for a constructive purpose. Days 102–104 discuss the halachos concerning listening for the relief of emotional pain. Day 105 explains when one can listen to lashon hara about the non-observant. [98] To what types of information can one listen for constructive purposes? [99] Before hearing negative information which may be constructive, what should a listener do to ensure that the speaker does not sin? [100] Is there any justification for drawing out negative information from a speaker without informing him that it is for a constructive purpose? [101] What conditions must be fulfilled before soliciting information? [102] Why is it not lowly to listen to someone’s frustrations? What should one be careful about in such situations? Can the listener believe the speaker? [103] When is it constructive for one spouse to listen to the other talk about difficulties, and when not? [104] What approach should a parent take in disciplining and educating his child about speaking lashon hara? [105] When can one listen to negative information about a non-observant Jew, and when not? Believing Lashon Hara [106] Why does the Torah warn us not to accept as fact negative statements said about people? [107] Can one accept as fact negative information said for a constructive purpose? [108] What is the correct way to respond on becoming aware of negative information? Should one alter the way one acts towards the subject of the negative report? Why?

Day Halachic Topic [109] Before relating negative information for a constructive purpose, what should the speaker say to the listener? NOTE: The elementary examination has no questions on Days 111–116; these days are covered in the advanced examination. [117] How does one do teshuvah for listening to and believing lashon hara? Should one inform the subject of the conversation that lashon hara was said about him? II. The Halachos of Rechilus (Days 118–148, 158–178) The Many Forms of Gossip [118] Definition: What is rechilus? [119] Can one tell someone that another spoke or acted against him, but in a manner which was totally justified? [120] Can the members of a committee or beis din reveal how they, or others, voted? [121] Can one reveal to a manufacturer, writer, or artist that a certain person does not like his work, or to a lecturer that a certain person did not enjoy his lecture? [122] Can one tell someone that another spoke against his friends, children, or other relatives? [123] Can one tell members of a community, family, school, or organization that others spoke against their group? Does it help if the members joke about themselves? [124] If ill feelings already exist between two parties, can one tell one party what the other did or said against him? [125] When can one relate to a third party non-derogatory information which, if passed on to others, might arouse animosity between two people? [126] How might the issur against speaking rechilus apply to information of which the listener is already aware? (Don’t confuse this with avak rechilus. See Day 131.)

Day Halachic Topic [127] Aside from speech, in what other ways is it ossur to communicate matters of rechilus? [128] What conditions must be satisfied before saying an ambiguous statement which could be interpreted by the listener as rechilus? [129] Are there any personal or practical reasons to justify speaking rechilus? (See Day 39.) [130] In what situations does silence constitute rechilus? Why is it better to lie than to speak rechilus? Avak Rechilus Overview In certain situations, even though the speaker has good intentions, his words might be forbidden if they arouse animosity between Jews. This can occur in a number of different ways, as outlined in Days 131–134. In addition, speech which arouses a minor degree of ill feeling constitutes avak rechilus (Day 135), as does revealing secrets for no constructive purpose (Day 136). [131] Can one remind another of how he was wronged by someone? Does it help if the speaker has no ill intentions? [132] Is saying, “I’d rather not tell you what So-and-so said about you.” rechilus or avak rechilus? [133] In what situation might praise be considered avak rechilus? [134] When seeking a person’s assistance, can one mention that he knows that others received similar assistance from him? Why? [135] Which issur is transgressed by arousing a minor degree of ill feeling between Jews? What episode in the Torah illustrates this? [136] What issurim might be transgressed by revealing confidential information? Laws of Toeles [137] When might it be considered a mitzvah to relate words which would otherwise be considered rechilus?

Day Halachic Topic [138] What are the three most common constructive motives for relating such information? [139] In what situation is it not constructive to identify to someone the person who caused him damage? TOELES: Seven Conditions [140] Condition #1: What source of information must be used to speak what would otherwise be rechilus? (Compare with condition #1, Day 43.) When seeking to prevent harm, what source of information can be used, and how should the information be presented? [141] Condition #2: How should one evaluate whether a wrong was, or will be, committed? (Compare with condition #2, Day 43.) [142] If someone overhears plotters, in what case should he inform the potential victim? In what case is it ossur to do so? [143] Condition #3: When must one rebuke the sinner before speaking about him, and when not? (Compare with Day 45.) [144] Condition #4: Are there any restrictions to what can be said l’toeles? (Compare with Day 47.) [145] Condition #5: Is the intent of the speaker relevant? Why? (Compare with Day 48.) [146] Is the chance of achieving the desired result relevant? (Remember that this halachah is in addition to the seven conditions. See Day 139. Compare with Day 44.) [147] Condition #6: When should an alternative to speaking rechilus l’toeles be pursued, and when is it unnecessary? (Compare with Day 46.) [148] Condition #7: May one relate rechilus l’toeles if the listener would respond by causing the subject undue harm? (Compare with Day 49.) NOTE: The elementary examination has no questions on Days 149–157; these days are covered in the advanced examination.

Day Halachic Topic Laws of Toeles [158] Conclusion: When is it best to be silent to avoid transgressing halachah, and when not? Listening to Rechilus [159] What issur d’Oraisa is violated by willfully listening to rechilus? (Compare with Day 91.) [160] Is it permissible to listen if the gossip concerns oneself or one’s family? [161] What should one do on hearing rechilus? Is an employee required to rebuke his employer? (Compare Days 161–163 with Day 95.) [162] How should one rebuke someone who is speaking rechilus to a group? [163] What should one do if one cannot interrupt the speaker? [164] What should be our approach concerning (i) contact with those that gossip, and (ii) settings prone to discussions of gossip? TOELES: Constructive Listening [165] What are three common constructive motives for listening to what would otherwise be rechilus? (See Day 138.) [166] Before listening to information which would be rechilus if not for the constructive purpose, what should a listener do to ensure that the speaker does not sin? (Compare with Day 99.) What should the listener do if the speaker was already telling the information to others before he arrived? [167] How should one solicit information which would be rechilus if not for the constructive purpose? (The conditions listed on Day 101 surely also apply here in most cases.) [168] Can one listen to rechilus to relieve another’s emotional pain? What should one be careful about in such situations? (Compare with Day 102.) Believing Rechilus [169] Why does the Torah warn us not to give credence to negative speech? (Compare with Day 106.)

Day Halachic Topic [170] Can one believe as fact rechilus said for a constructive purpose? (Compare with Day 107.) [171] Can one believe another’s insight which transforms an apparently innocent occurrence into a malicious act? (Compare with Day 126.) [172] What is the correct way to respond to negative information related for a constructive purpose? (Compare with Day 108.) [173] What should one do if one finds it difficult to believe that rechilus heard from a close friend is totally false? [174] Can one believe rechilus related in public or in the presence of the subject? Laws of Rechilus [178] How should one do teshuvah for: (i) speaking rechilus, (ii) listening to rechilus; and (iii) believing rechilus?

Elementary Shmiras Halashon —Sample Examination—

This examination consists of the following two parts, each worth 50% of the total grade:

1. Concepts of Shmiras Halashon Answer all three multiple choice questions and one out of three short answer questions.

2. Halachos of Shmiras Halashon Answer all three multiple choice questions and one out of three short answer questions.

The answers to all questions in this sample examination can be found on pages 36-37.

1. Concepts of Shmiras Halashon

I. Multiple Choice (25%)

Directions: Answer the following three questions, selecting the best out of the four suggested answers.

1. Why is there no affliction of tz ara’as in our times? A. The transgression of lashon hara is so rare in our time due to the enormous influence of contemporary works like Sefer Chofetz Chaim. B. The sin of lashon hara is so prevalent nowadays that if tzara’as was administered, everybody would be living in metzora zones and nothing would be accomplished. C. Since there is no Beis Hamikdash, and therefore there is no way to perform the process of taharah, if someone had tzara’as now, he would be stuck in tumah indefinitely. D. Tzara’as does still exist in our times just as in the times of the Beis Hamikdash, but since it is a spiritual affliction, we are not on the requisite level of kedushah to perceive it.

2. The halachos of proper speech are directives for A. how to perceive people B. how to speak to people C. how to speak about people D. all of the above

3. Theaveirah of lashon hara is the antithesis of which mitzvah, and why? A. the mitzvah of chessed, because lashon hara breaks up friendships and chessed forges friendships B. the mitzvah of keeping kosher, because lashon hara contaminates the mouth while kashrus sanctifies the mouth C. the mitzvah of limud haTorah, because lashon hara is equivalent to all other aveiros combined, and Torah is equivalent to all other mitzvos combined D. the mitzvah of judging people favorably, because lashon hara is the result of looking for faults in people, and judging favorably requires one to look for the good in people

II. Short Answers (25%)

Directions: Answer one out of the following three questions. Please limit your answer to about 40 words. Partial credit is awarded for partial answers. No extra credit is granted if you answer more questions than required.

1. According to the Maharal, what are we to learn from the fact that the tongue is partially hidden and partially revealed?

2. Explain with examples how lashon hara can literally destroy people and every aspect of their lives.

3. Besides the four basic forms of lashon hara, in what other ways is it forbidden to speak? Give two examples.

2. Halachos of Shmiras Halashon

I. Multiple Choice (25%)

Directions: Answer the following three questions, selecting the best out of the four suggested answers.

1. When is it NOT considered derogatory to reveal that someone is remiss in his observance of halachah? A. He is a member of a social circle where halachah is commonly ignored. B. He has publicly displayed his disregard for halachah, and is considered wicked. C. He has told people that he doesn’t mind if people reveal this information. D. The information is common knowledge.

2. Which of the following issurim is violated if one conveys negative information for a constructive purpose without informing the listeners that the conversation is permitted? A. motzi shem ra B. rechilus C. lashon hara D. avak lashon hara

3. When speaking negatively for a constructive purpose, one must be accurate in conveying the necessary information. Nevertheless, which of the following is muttar? A. omitting true negative details — if the constructive purpose can be achieved without mentioning them B. altering facts — if the constructive purpose cannot be achieved without it C. omitting true positive details that would minimize the severity of the person’s actions — if the constructive purpose cannot otherwise be achieved D. using superlatives (e.g., “very”) to exaggerate — if the constructive purpose cannot otherwise be achieved

II. Short Answers (25%)

1. Which type of lashon hara is forbidden despite the subject’s approval, and which is permitted because of it?

2. In what way can a manufacturer who is the victim of lashon hara respond?

3. How does one do teshuvah for uttering a potentially harmful statement?

1. Concepts of Shmiras Halashon —Answer Key—

Below are the answers to all the questions in the sample examination section on concepts of Shmiras Halashon.

I. Multiple Choice

Day Day Day 1. C 41 2. D xxi 3. C 11

II. Short Answers

1. According to the Maharal, what are we to learn from the fact that the tongue is partially hidden and partially revealed? It shows us that speech is a vehicle by which a person reveals his hidden self — his thoughts, ideas, and personality. (Overview, page xxi)

2. Explain with examples how lashon hara can literally destroy people and every aspect of their lives. Lashon hara affects the way others view the subject. It can thus mean a lost job or business opportunity or a damaged marriage or friendship. Lashon hara diminishes a person’s self-worth. For example, if others look down on someone as a result of lashon hara, he might feel lowly, depressed, or a failure. As a result, he will not live up to his potential. (Overview, page xxxv)

3. Besides the four basic forms of lashon hara, in what other ways is it forbidden to speak? Give two examples. One should not speak in a way that “violates the sanctity of the mouth” and is contrary to respectable character traits. For example, with lies or words of anger. (Other examples include words of arrogance, deceit, and false flattery.) (Overview, page xli)

2. Halachos of Shmiras Halashon —Answer Key—

Below are the answers to all the questions in the sample examination section on the halachos of Shmiras Halashon.

I. Multiple Choice

Day Day Day 1. B 2,10,11, 14, 2. D 37 3. A 46,47

II. Short Answers

1. Which type of lashon hara is forbidden despite the subject’s approval, and which is permitted because of it? Derogatory statements are always forbidden despite the approval of the subject. (Day 10) Harmful information is permissible when the subject willingly subjects himself to the potential harm. (Day 23)

2. In what way can a manufacturer who is the victim of lashon hara respond? He cannot respond by a counter-offensive of defamation, but he can take the offending party to a beis din for compensation. (Day 40)

3. How does one do teshuvah for uttering a potentially harmful statement? One should confess, feel regret, and make a resolution not to speak lashon hara again. One must also prevent damage by approaching anyone who has heard the harmful information and explain that it was inaccurate. (Days 17 and 27)