OZ IS TWISTED a play

Book By Joe Ferriero

Based on the Story By L. Frank Baum

Acting Script Final Copy May, 2011

Protected by Copyright

i Cast of Characters

Real World Characters: Gale ...... 16 years old, New York High Schooler James Gale ...... Dorothy’s Dad ...... Dorothy’s Aunt ...... Dorothy’s Uncle Sheriff ...... of small town ...... a stuffed toy, not a real dog! Willy, Edna, Margret ...... farm hands

Oz Characters: ...... Loq ...... Another Munchkin Toq ...... Another Munchkin Glinda ...... the Good Witch of the South Locasta ...... the Bastinda ...... Witch of the West ...... found in the outskirts of Tinman ...... called Nick Chopper, now made fully of tin Cowardly ...... a lion in search of courage The Crow Bars ...... a singing group of 3 Crows Pine and Oak ...... Fighting Trees ...... The great and powerful Conductor & Passengers ...... Of the Great Gillikin Railway Guards ...... of the gate (2)

Note: Several actors should be doubled as per the notes below, however if a larger cast is required some edits to the end of the script will allow for less doubling.

Required Doubling: The actor playing James Gale should also play the Wizard of Oz, the actor playing Willy should play the Tinman, the actor playing Aunt Em should play Locasta, the actor playing Uncle Henry should play Pine.

Sex: Female Male Either Dorothy James Boq Aunt Em Uncle Henry Toq Edna Willy Loq Margret Tin Woodsman Glinda Wizard of Oz Pine Locasta Oak Bastinda (WICKED) Guardians Scarecrow The Crow Bars

9 Females 5 Males 8 Either [22]

Ensemble: , , Poppies

ii Scenes

Act One Scene 1 : Apartment, NYC Scene 2 : The Farmyard, Kansas Scene 3 : Munchkinland, Oz Scene 4 : Old , Oz Scene 5 : The Pine Barrens, Oz Scene 6 : The Poppy Field, Oz Scene 7 : The , Oz

Act Two Scene 1 : Castle of the Scene 2 : Witches Spell Room Scene 3 : Outside the Castle Scene 4 : Witches Spell Room Scene 5 : Oz’s Palace

©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com OZ is TWISTED Act One 1 Act One

Scene One : The Gale Apartment, NYC

[the apartment is scarcely decorated, Dorothy is sitting in her bedroom, talking on her cell phone]

DOROTHY: I don’t know … maybe. I am trying to get out of it. Ask your mom again. I can stay in your room.

JAMES: (from off stage) Dorothy, finish packing and get out here.

DOROTHY: (calling to her dad) Be there in a minute. (back to phone) Look, I gotta go! Text me. Bye. (Dorothy finishes packing her stuff as her dad enters)

JAMES: What is taking so long?

DOROTHY: Do I have to go?

JAMES: We are not going through this again! I have to go away for business. You are too young to stay here alone. Plus your aunt is looking forward to seeing you. It has been years.

DOROTHY: I don’t even know her.

JAMES: Yes, you do. She was here for your birthday.

DOROTHY: Yeah, in 1998! I was 3! I don’t want to go to Kansas! What is there to do there?

JAMES: Your Aunt and Uncle own a farm, you could play with the animals.

DOROTHY: Play? Does it look like I want to play with animals!?

JAMES: What about him? (picks up a stuffed dog toy)

DOROTHY: Dad! I haven’t played with that in years!

JAMES: Toto was your favorite toy growing up. You went everywhere with him.

DOROTHY: Dad, please. Do I really have to go?

JAMES: You have to go. Come on, let’s go grab a taxi and take you to JFK.

DOROTHY: I will be there in a minute.

JAMES: I’m going down to get the taxi, hurry up! (he exits)

2 (Dorothy continues to pack, the last thing she packs is a stuffed dog toy; Toto)

Scene Two: The Farmyard

(Aunt Em, Uncle Henry and Dorothy enter together, Henry is carrying a suitcase, Dorothy another.)

AUNT EM: Well, this is it. Our humble farm.

DOROTHY: It’s nice, I guess.

UNCLE HENRY: That there is the chicken house and the barn. Have you ever rode a horse?

DOROTHY: No.

UNCLE HENRY: Well, alright. You can take a tour later.

AUNT EM: Yes, and tomorrow you can help us with all of the chores.

DOROTHY: Chores?

AUNT EM: Yes, there is a lot to do on the farm. We sure could use all the help we can get. We have a few farm hands that help out.

UNCLE HENRY: (some farm hands enter, all working on different parts of the farmyard) That’s Edna, and Willy and Margret.

DOROTHY: I don’t know about this.

UNCLE HENRY: Well, instead of doing your chores at home, you will do chores here.

DOROTHY: I don’t really do chores at home. Since mom died, dad has been, well he has done everything.

AUNT EM: That’s not like my brother. We were both raised the same way, with responsibility.

DOROTHY: I mean, I do wash the dishes once in a while. I’m sure that counts.

UNCLE HENRY: We’re talking about real responsibility here. Like feeding the chickens, collecting eggs, cleaning up after the animals.

DOROTHY: Cleaning up after the animals? As in …?

AUNT EM: As in their waste.

DOROTHY: OH, no way am I cleaning up horse poop. That’s gross. ©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com 3

UNCLE HENRY: It’s a part of life!

AUNT EM: Now, enough talk about this. Let’s get inside. We’ll get you unpacked.

UNCLE HENRY: Here, let me take your bag. (as he takes the bag from Dorothy it opens, her stuff is dropped out, including Toto) Sorry about that.

EDNA: Let me help with that. (helps pick up Dorothy’s items, Aunt Em, Uncle Henry, Edna & Margret take Dorothy’s items inside the house)

WILLY: (picks up Toto, hands it to Dorothy) You seem to have this. He looks old.

DOROTHY: Yes, my mother gave that to me years ago.

WILLY: Does he have a name.

DOROTHY: Toto.

WILLY: That’s a fun name. Where did it come from.

DOROTHY: Well, my mom use to tell me that when I was little whenever I would see a dog I would say toto, so, the name just stuck with him.

WILLY: Emily, uhhh … your aunt tells me that your mom died a few years ago. Sorry.

DOROTHY: Yeah.

WILLY: My name is Willy by the way.

DOROTHY: Yeah, I know.

WILLY: Oh. Well, I guess I should go finish feeding the chickens. I’m hoping the eggs will hatch sometime soon. Have you ever seen baby chicks?

DOROTHY: In kindergarten we hatched eggs in the classroom.

WILLY: You raised chickens in ?

DOROTHY: No, we just hatch the eggs, then we sent them back.

WILLY: Back to where?

DOROTHY: I don’t know, the nugget factory?

WILLY: Dorothy, you have a lot to learn about a farm.

©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com 4 DOROTHY: No thanks. (she takes out her cell phone) Darn, no reception. Could this day get any worse?

WILLY: Well, looking at the sky, I would say it is about to. Looks like there is a coming in.

DOROTHY: Perfect.

WILLY: A storm usually brings a beautiful rainbow out. A rainbow is a sign of good luck!

DOROTHY: Where I come from a rainbow means something a little different. They are all over the east village.

WILLY: People there must be really lucky.

DOROTHY: Yeah, sure.

WILLY: Well, I better get moving. I will talk to you soon. See you later Dorothy. (he begins to walk away, turns around) Oh, here’s Toto back.

DOROTHY: Thanks (Willy exits – Dorothy, still trying to get cell service) Hello? Can you hear me now? Hello? Ugg, I hate Kansas. (she wanders off stage – we hear the wind and the stage darkens)

UNCLE HENRY: (exits from the house) Oh, no, it’s a tornado, Em.

AUNT EM: (follows) Oh no. Open the storm cellar Henry. I’ll get Dorothy.

UNCLE HENRY: Hurry! (he exits)

AUNT EM: Dorothy! Dorothy!

UNCLE HENRY: (from offstage) Hurry Em, it’s gettin’ closer!

AUNT EM: Dorothy! Dorothy!

UNCLE HENRY: (rushes onstage and drags Aunt Em off) We have to go now!

AUNT EM: No, Dorothy!! (they exit)

DOROTHY: (Rushes onto stage) Oh no. Aunt Em? A tornado! Aunt Em? (she rushes into the house)

The Cyclone

(The theatre is darkened, we hear wind. This is a great opportunity to insert a cyclone ballet dance number. Choose a piece of music that is in public domain and mix with wind sound effects.)

©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com 5 Scene Three : Munchkinland

As lights come up on munchkinland we discover that a small farmhouse has fallen on the and we only see her legs and slippers sticking out.

DOROTHY: (exiting the house with toto in hand) Oh, Toto. I’m so scared. What is this place? Where’s Aunt Em? (looks around) Uncle Henry? Willy? That cyclone picked the house right up – and put it down again – but where?

BOQ: (enters from right) Welcome, most noble witch to the country of the munchkins.

DOROTHY: (still holding Toto) What?

LOQ: (entering) We are grateful to you, noble witch.

DOROTHY: Who you calling a witch? My name is Dorothy.

TOQ: (entering) Oh snap, you killed the wicked witch of the East and set us free.

DOROTHY: (noticing the witches feet) Oh no. I didn’t mean to. I Don’t understand. Free? From what?

BOQ: We shall call Glinda to explain.

DOROTHY: Glinda?

LOQ: The good witch of the South.

DOROTHY: A good witch, why I’ve never heard of such a thing.

TOQ: Oh, yes, she is very good. Call for her Boq.

BOQ: Sure thing, Toq. (he clears is throat) Dorothy, please do not repeat this, only the munchkins can call Glinda in this way …

LOQ: Oh, yes, it is a very secret way of calling Glinda.

TOQ: You must promise, never to call Glinda in this special way.

DOROTHY: O.K. , I promise.

BOQ: (again, clearing his throat – yelling) Yo, Glinda – we need you!

DOROTHY: That was a special way?

GLINDA: (entering in her bubble, we hear her sing) AHHHHHHHHH … Glinda in the house! Can I get a what, what? ©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com 6

MUNCHKINS: What, what! (additional munchkins pop out)

GLINDA: And I’ve heard the news. What a glorious day here in Munchkinland!

TOQ: Dorothy has killed the Wicked Witch of the East!

DOROTHY: I tell you, I didn’t mean to hurt her.

GLINDA: You have set the munchkins free. The Wicked Witch held them in bondage for many years, making them slave for her night and day. They are very grateful you came to their rescue!

DOROTHY: That’s terrible. But, I didn’t intend on killing anyone.

GLINDA: No matter your intentions, It’s a miracle!

DOROTHY: Where am I?

GLINDA: Munchkin Country … in the magical .

DOROTHY: Oz? Is that anywhere near Kansas City?

GLINDA: I’m afraid I don’t know where that is.

DOROTHY: You are a witch?

GLINDA: Yes, Glinda, the Good Witch of the South.

DOROTHY: I’ve never heard of a Good Witch?

GLINDA: Yes, there are two of us. My sisiter, Locasta is the Good Witch of the North and ruler of the .

DOROTHY: I thought all witches were wicked and ugly. You’re very pretty.

GLINDA: I know, I use moisturizers every night … no plastic surgery here!

DOROTHY: O.K., So the wicked witch is dead?

BOQ: That wicked witch is dead.

TOQ: There’s also her sister, the wicked witch of the West.

LOQ: Thank you for making us free. We shall build you a home here in Munchkinland.

DOROTHY: Oh, thank you but, I would like to go back home. (to Glinda) Can you help?

©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com 7 GLINDA: I wish I knew how to help you.

BOQ: Perhaps, Oz will help her.

TOQ: Dorothy, you can go see the wizard … to the Emerald City.

MUNCHKINS: The Emerald City – ahhhh.

GLINDA: Great idea. Maybe the great Wizard of Oz can help you.

DOROTHY: Where is the city? Who is Oz?

GLINDA: It is exactly in the center of things and is ruled by Oz, the great wizard I spoke of.

DOROTHY: How do I get there?

GLINDA: You must walk. It’s a long journey, sometimes dark and terrible. Sometimes bright and wonderful. (a beat) But mostly dark and terrible. However, I will use all my magic arts to keep you from harm.

DOROTHY: Won’t you go with me?

GLINDA: I cannot do that, but I will give you my blessing, and no one will dare injure a person who has been blessed by Glinda the Good.

BOQ: The road to the Emerald City is paved in yellow brick.

LOQ: You can’t miss it.

GLINDA: When you get to Oz, do not be afraid of him, but tell your story of the cyclone and ask his help. (we suddenly hear thunder and the wicked witch of the West appears)

WICKED: Where is she? Where is my sister?

BOQ: No, the wicked witch of the west! (All the munchkins hide)

WICKED: (notices Glinda) Oh, well if it isn’t Glinda – the good!

GLINDA: That’s me …. What’s up?

WICKED: So where is my sister?

GLINDA: There. (pointing to the house)

WICKED: All I see are her feet, oh, I see … you turned her into a house! You better change her back now or I’l ---

GLINDA: I didn’t turn her into a house, she (pointing to Dorothy) dropped a house on her. ©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com 8

WICKED: What? Ahhhh …. My sister! … You … you!!

DOROTHY: I didn’t mean it! I swear! My house just dropped on her!

WICKED: Oh, little miss Clumsy! I can cause accidents too.

GLINDA: Watch that , you could poke someone eye’s out!

WICKED: Excuse me! Witches are suppose to travel by broom, we all can’t go around in bubbles!

GLINDA: Aren’t you forgetting the slippers?

WICKED: The slippers, oh yes, those , how I loved them. You know they’re Prada. (she goes to get the slippers) They’re gone! No!! The slippers! They were my size and everything. (she uncovers a munchkin) Have you seen them?! My slippers … no!! What have you done with them? Give them back.

GLINDA: It’s too late. There they are (on Dorothy) and there they’ll stay!

WICKED: Uh huh … give me back the slippers. (nicely) Dorothy, is it? Can I call ya Dot? You know, Dot, I’m the only one who really knows how to use those slippers.

GLINDA: Dorothy, never take them off.

DOROTHY: (whispers to Glinda) What do they do?

GLINDA: No idea, but they must be powerful? Plus they totally match your outfit!

WICKED: Stay out of this Glinda.

GLINDA: Ha! You don’t scare me. Your powers can hurt me here.

WICKED: You … you … Blonde.

GLINDA: Broccoli face!

WICKED: Oh, no you didn’t! (a wand-broom fight ensues)

GLINDA: Look a flying …

WICKED: Where? (breaking the fight) Ohh, you think your slick Glinda! (to Dorothy) Well, I can’t touch you here in Munchkinland sweet little Dorothy! But you won’t escape forever. I will make you pay for what you did to my sister!

©Joe Ferriero | Twisted Plays | www.twistedplays.com END OF PERUSAL COPY

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