THE TEESDALE MERCURY—WEDNESDAY, JULY 20, 1910.

[AM. Ki*i say Tm pretty bad, Lydia; but I like TOU OUR SHORT STORY. you know. Let's shake hands and part:„ WHO'S WHO—AND WHY. TEA TABLE TALK. HUMOUR OF THE WEEK. friends." Lady Lydia gave him a dainty curtsey in • A clever Danish lady, Fran Agnete von A HOST IN HIMSELF. stead of her hand. LORD WARDEN OP THE STANNARIES. LADY LYDIA. "You are quite right," she said. "I don't Lord Balfour of Burleigh, who has been Bauditz, has lately passed an examination in Asked if he wanted to call any witnesses, a care two -straws for you! Good-bye. By appointed Lord Warden of the Stannaries Copenhagen that entitles her to act as a Kingston defendant said: "I conld bring ship's captain. So good was ber work that BY OWEN OLIVER. the way "—-she looked over her shouldei in the Council of the Prince of Wales, is hundreds if I like, but I am quite enough." from the door—"don't you think you'c1 ninth baron of a creation which is over 300 the judges marked her paper "excellent." better apologise to my husband? He's so years old. The first Lord Balfour of Bur­ She has now obtained a concession from the There wu only one drawback to Lady much bigger than you! . . . What did yot leigh was -created in 1607, but the title fell Danish authorities to pilot mail steamers to LOOKING rOEWAED. Lydia, society said — her own exclusive say? Nothing? Good-bye." into abeyance in 1715, when Robert, Lord Ise Fjord. Old Gent (proposing health of happy pair CHAPTI Society. The drawback was her husband. And then her skirts rustled down the pa^ BalfouT, was attainted for taking part in * * * at the wedding breakfast): "And as for the His name was Brown, and he was the only sago; and Graham laughed a laugh that w«s the rebellion of that year. This Robert had For years past the Countess of Warwick bridegroom, I can speak with still more con­ PKEI'AEIVl son of old Bill Brown, the millionaire. not exactly laughter. a curious history, for in 1709 he was tried has taken a practical interest in all matters fidence of him, for I was present at his Brown pere had made his money by soap for the murder of a schoolmaster and sen­ social, political, and industrial connected gevmour was not He went the next afternoon. He had beer: christening, I was present at the banquet „, 'ipated. Only and brains. Brown his had inherited the playing tennis with Brown all the morning, tenced to be beheaded, but managed to with her own sex, yet it is only since 1897 given in honour of his coming of age, I am ic money without the brains, and the money escape from prison dressed in his sister's '•f.ised before a cab I and when they had finished, and were putt that she has been prominently before the present here to-day, and I trust, I may be la clothes. The attainder was removed in 18G0 f Clgrave-Square, fj had been made too late to bring him up as a ing on their jackets, and mopping their fore­ public as advocating the cry of "back to the spared to be present at his funeral." (Sen­ in favour of the present peer. Lord Balfour For a half centur J°H man guised as • | "gentleman." It was not merely that he heads, he spoke to him. land" for women as well as for men. sation.) had missed the civilising influences of a of Burleigh's official experience has been * * * its use and fame haveN ^rticularly original ''I say, old chap." he saiti awkwardly, extensive. He was Parliamentary Secretary • Lrved the purpose public school and a university. He had "your wife—spoke to me. She is such a Miss Margaret Cook, the world's only been extending. Now miUionsX to the Board of Trade some 20 years ago, WHAT'S IN A NAME? J He wore a actually taken part in his father's business charming woman that a fellow can't help en­ "book-surgeon," is nineteen ye. s of age, ' use it. For it shines brightest, and\ for four years. lie had even been known was Secretary for Scotland from 1895 till hi h ls joying her company. I am afraid I imposed and studied artistic bookbinding when still a Judge Smyly, K.C., asked a plaintiff at fit shines longest. It is easily put an\ ido"»««, to allude to the fact. So he was clearly an 1903, and has been chairman of many Royal 'and it cannot rub off. The clothing i l \ r ' a little on her good-nature, and, of course, child. She has for the past year held the the Shoreditch Countv-court: "What is the s *hroidered with queer] outsider. Commissions. Further, he has been a Lord- position of "book-surgeon" in the Astor defendant?" [not soiled, while the shoes are softened! people might misunderstand, as you told in-Waiting and a Lord Rector of Edinburgh »kis bead was a black" Lady Lydia, who said very hard things in her: but you wouldn't, of course. Anyhow, Library in New York, her duties being to re­ Plaintiff: "He's had eleven addresses in as and preserved by its use. • very soft voice, called him -her dancing University, while he has also acted as chair­ pair all torn leaves and damaged covers of IKS* you'll take my word that—that you aud I many months, so I should call him a grass­ Especially is it appreciated for ladies'j ^ fe illusion, bear. The name stuck to him. man of Committees of the House of Lords. volumes which are used by the public. Miss e can be friends. I'd like to." Lord Balfour of Burleigh is a Free Trade hopper, but he describes himself as a finan­ and children's shoes, which it keeps in pei "•cpytnour stood still The women spoke of him with more "So would I," said Brown. Cook's salary is £3M a year. cial expert, and I believe him." \ feet condition. malice. "He's a bear that won't dance!" Unionist, and he was one of the peers who Ifumb'led about as if The t'vo men shook hands firmly. * * * * Lady Kitty Spreighton protested, making opposed the rejection of the Budget by the Kjighv. effectively dis ***** House of Lords. At Sandringham Queen Alexandra has one Maae only by k»Sie forward and p| wicked eyes over her fan. He was, indeed, •WHAT LANGUAGE ? S.C, L. Hauthaway & Sons, t nc. > There was a good deal of talk over Gra­ or two uncommon little garden plots. In one J? it's all right," 1 densely stupid at the groat social game of "There was a young fellow there who said BOSTON, MASS., U. S. A. flirtation. His wife was "all the women," ham's sudden departure. Tho general she grows nothing but South African plants. ibeen talking it over A FRIEND OF KING EDWARD. These were presented to her Majesty by her he was deaf and dumb," remarked a witness Agent, for United Kingdom • jjd not think it won so far as he was concerned, and he saw no­ opinion was that Lady Lydia had perceived _ JOHS S. DEED A BOSS, LtA^ at Clerkenwell County-court. thing wrong in anything that she did—not that things were going too far. and had dis­ One of the friends of the late King friends among the officers who served in the London, England. hou here for a sec even in her flirtations. missed him without compunction. "Lydia is Edward's early manhood was the Earl of Boer War. They, knowing her interest in Judge Edge: "That is rather curious." li.ve to be very ear perfectly heartless," Carthwaite told his these veldt blossoms, either sent or brought how much Anstruth Lady Lydia did not parade her genius for Mount Edgcumbe, who has been appointed ot 16 home with them lovely specimens of the pure h»ve g *° t* hack flirtations, and a cleverer man than her hus­ younger sister, "and cared no more for him Keeper of the Privy Seal to his late white rose of the country, the delicate lilies, HE GUESSED. « to the contrary] band might have overlooked it. Such men than she does for anyone elee." His younger Majesty's grandson, the Prince of Wales. n0 and other flowers which bloom out there, but Whilst walking along a quiet by-street an ••I did not quite ecn more, as a THE "RED EARL." of a European ruler—winning a hurdle race Here are some genuine school howlers, [gin at once?" Rigbf when everyone supposed that he was asleep. crowd of flycatchers still remained eutside-j The excitement over Captain Graham's de­ Ear) Spencer, who has recently been when pitted against military officers. This from recent examination papers: [not like to see Barr office with their day's catch, but by tlii< t His flirt at i on with Lady Lydia was diffe­ parture culminated when Lady Lydia's hus­ seriously ill, is almost the last of the old feat was accomplished at Luxemberg not fieymour intimate What are fossils?—Fossils are those re­ the clerks were tired of counting the flies a rent from the others—a case of Greek and band drove to the station with him. Some­ sehool of politicians that link us with long since by Princess Charlotte (the reign­ I hurry, and that the mains of plants and animals wSich keep best sorting them from the bluebottles, and at Greek. He did not let her flirt with anyone one suggested that their apparent cordiality Beaconsfield and Gladstone, whose great ing Grand Duke's second daughter) who will I mind would be bea else, and the intimacy did not end in a few wai only a blind, and that they were going not be thirteen until the 23rd of this mouth. when left to themselves. dition the funds were running rather short, ] I time. That meal WL friend the Earl was. He has been longer in A volcano is a very powerful rock. weeks, and he did not pretend that the flirta­ off to fight a duel. Carthwaite rode hastily the Lords than its present leader, for he The race took place at the Annual Military- f;i~- and furious aflh] tion was anything but a flirtation. She was after them. He felt that he ought to stop Sports Meeting, and with the single excep­ What is the feminine of bachelor?—Old j were supposed to all succeeded his father to the earldom as far Made, Axminster. not capable of anything else, he often told the duel if he could; and if he couldn't— back as 1857. Soon after this (says tion of little Princess Charlotte, all the [ ters which they per Name some English sovereigns who died FOUNTAIN PEN PROFITS. her. This seemed to chafe her. She grew well, he never liked to ntis6 sport, and they "M.A.P.") he became attached to the house­ starters were military officers. Mounted on " Therefore I sho violent deaths.—Queen Elizabeth. She fell rather impatient with her husband about were remarkably fine shots, both of them. hold of the Prince Consort, and subse­ her own hunter, and served by her feather Barmouth," Seymou into a deep sleep. Damages of JE200 were awarded by Mr. Jsj rau^e this time, and called him "a bear" with a He only reached the station a,s the train was quently to that of the late King, when weight, Princess Charlotte, who is an in­ I a meeting fori How could the King have let all the tice Ridley, in the King's Bench Division, I touch of bitterness. Carthwaite watched going off, ans in the who boy. "Please, sorr," he said, "Misther a year, and afterwards for three years at 3s. 3d. each, and these were recogms mind your own business." all that sort of thing, you know." A smartly dressed young woman, at Acton, iWj impossible to "It's Brown's business," Carthwaite as­ Birmingham under Max Mossel. This was those which were sold to Mr. Skidmore. "I—I say!" Carthwaite repeated. He felt is waitin' to spake wid you. He sez, who wanted a summons for abuse, on being lev.od men so hideo serted, "and that makes it mine to an ex­ followed'by twelve months with Professor One man's eyes weti the situation beyond him. "I—I don't know will yez come at wauce." "Are you not asked what the abuse consisted of, said: "I tent. Hang it all. he paid my debts." .Tohann Kruse, and while with him the great l/Mwn ; but thi what L\dia will say." making a mistake, my lad!" asked the Earl. could not use such expressions in front of Proposals for the adoption of Greenwicht "Yes," said Lady Lydia, "and you didn't Kubelik interested himself in Miss Hairs be­ Aility of expre Lady Lydia said that her husband could "No, your honour," answered the boy with you or the public." France are under the consideration of have to marry him! If you want "to preach, half, introducing her by personal letter to rsfberrity,* seemed i go to Africa—or to a warmer climate- and inconvenient frankness. "I was to'uld to The Magistrate: "You won't shock us, we mittee of the French Senate. father has the gift of a few livings, if he Sevcik, under whom she remained two years. loo: of 'their fcatui welcome. look out for the man wid the ginger are accustomed to bad language here." She made ber first public appearance in Sir E. Sassoon has introduced in Parlii Fti'r.-ied from ,Jlem , hasn't anything else. You'd better take Nevertheless, she seemed a trifle annoyed whiskers." Vienna in 1902, when eighteen years of age, She wrote it down, and the summons was Bill to render the installation of wireless t one. I can look after myself, thank you. I that he was able to do without her. No I Tt;>v stood there lc and was immediately successful. immediately granted. on passenger ships compulsory. don't flirt with third-rate actresses, any­ woman likes to lose an admirer; not even if very image of the >j how." THE JUDGE'S CONSOLATION. * * * A young man or foreign appearance was r don was still discus he is her husband ! She was very snappish from Glasgow to Dublin, charged wit* h So Carthwaite went off in a rage, and Besides having considerable arrears of A GOOD SUGGESTION. •lour dropped Bat_ for the next few- days while he was in town work to overtake, the Bench of judges is The interesting confession made by that into a post-office and stealing £iU0 from I Lady Lydia went off golfing with Graham. The Rev. Arthur F. Young, the vicar of the latter burst into! arranging about his expedition. short handed just now, owing to the illness famous French actress, Yvette Guilbert, re­ safe. She went pretty often, and some of tho | " No reason to Two days before the bear's departure ne of Mr. Justice Jelf, who may be unable to cently, to the effect that she is an ardent Rudgwick, Sussex, has the following women said nasty things about her. Some had a telegram, and went to town by the Suffragette and wants a vote, recalls the "answer to a correspondent" in his parish In the Edinburgh Court of Session an aetissl be said. " When of the men used hard words about her hus­ appear in the Courts until after the Long Mrs. Williams, of the Gaiety Theatre, Do* next train. When he came back he looked Vacation. It has been said of Sir Arthur keen interest which she takes in the rights magazine: l»t me, we both kn« band. They thought he ought to j-unch more bearish than ever. They were playing of women, particularly those of her own against Malcolm Scott, the comedian, for [outside the pale of Graham's head, being the only man there who that he goes through life rejoicing, for "Wearypins." — Your complaint that alleged breach of contract, was dismissed. bridge when he arrived, and Lady Lydia did though* he has worked extremely hard profession. "I want to defend our profes­ Church-hill is much steeper on Sunday j make the most of could do it. Instead of that he beat him at not deign to notice him, but Carthwaite sion," she says; "to enable all actresses to I ,fe .naDPy hours billiards and tennis, and bowled to him for throughout his career, he is always genial morning than Saturday night has no foun­ ou turned round from the next table and gave and humorous. "Why do you weep?" he earn enough money to live respectably, and dation. If there is any difference in "in­ I«»,' - an hour daily. He had been a great him a friendly nod. to stop the abuse of the weakness erf cricketer in his time, and he wanted to im­ Ones asked a lachrymose prisoner who clination " it must be in yourself. Think I Sevmour "Why, old man," he said. "You look as women." In Paris she has founded an I cigarotte and we . prove Graham's batting. He liked Graham. appeared before him when he was Recorder it over. Your idea that the parish coun­ if you'd found sixpence and lost a sove­ organisation to provide poorly - paid Ire^her. Do you hapfj One day Lady Lydia and Captain Graham of Shrewsbury. "Oh ! my lord, my dear cil should put hinges on the road, and tip — A reign." lord.'' came the tearful answer, "I have actresses with drosses, so that they may be it up on Sundays, is very clever, but the | Barmouth indieafa went off in the motor. They drove in turn—• "I haven't found the sixpence," Lady able to get work. In this way she has helped I'erris perfectly welt never, never been to prison before." "Donrt council cannot undertake to carry it out. • ' In fact, we forty miles an hour—shaving corners and Lydia's husband said; "but you may as weil weiL nearly running into a quarry, and laughing cry, prisoner at the bar," was the cheerful ioO ladies. ceremony," he said.1 know that I've lost all my sovereigns. I've response, "I am going to send you there * * « carelessly at their escapes. new. it wag. And just come to say good-bye. I'm off to the THE ONLY DIFFICULTY. now." Sir Arthur was born at Panko-.v, The Queen of Denmark once paid a visit S0r...i„g i „ "You "and 1 and Carthwaite have all the backwoods, or somewhere, to-morrow." near Berlin, his mother being the Countess on w thout luck here," she said, as they went headlong to the Dan.ish colony of Iceland, where the "It's a very simple thing to pay, you *°r his fellowcounlj No one spoke for a few moments. Tlten Slipponhach of Prussia, a Maid of Honour good old bishop exerted himself to the know," said Judge Bray in the Shoreditch | »as that thev were Sown Breakneck Hill. Lady Lydia finished her hand. to the Queen of Hanover. He was, however, "No," Graham protested. "There's your utmost to show her everything that was County-court the other day. """self. But I w, "Three in hearts," she said. "Game and educated at Eton and Oxford, and became a ha husband." worth seeing. The Queen paid many com­ "Yes," replied the defendant's solicitor, * '-. Do you mea rubber. . . . The backwoods will be i barrister of the Inner Temple in 1863, and pliments to her host, and, having learnt "Mv husband?" She looked at him "but the job is to find the money." (Laugh­ I *erris?" rather fun. I shall have to cook, and chop | Q.C. in 1880. He was known at the Bar to that he was a family man, graciously in­ quickly, and shrugged her shoulders. "One's ter.) erri the wood, I suppose, sha'n't I?" I be a most persistent fighter. Sir Arthur quired how many children he had. It hap­ -,'\? * >• at thel husband never counts." he She rose with a laugh, and took her hus­ was raised to the Bench in 1901. pens that the Danish word for "children " is I *\, Present mon "Not with his wife, apparently; but, hang A FOREIGN TONGUE. THE DEADLY MOTOR. band's arm. Uore or less sod it all, Lydia, he> a man. You may be sur­ almost identical in sound with the Icelandic "Sha'n't I?" she repeated, with a little word for "sheep," and the worthy bishop A police officer who had arrested a man on "Afield. Jack Mi prised to hear that I like him; but I do. I Out of a total of 1,151 fatal accid«»*J*l 1 side-way smile at him. Carthwaite thought a charge of street betting told the West U'" that he kno. —I'm going sway." TAXI-DRIVER V.C. promptly answered, "Two hundred." "Two by vehicles in the streets of the Um«"~5' that he had uever seen his beautiful sister—• hundred children!" cried the Queen. "How London magistrate that the man said to a tel'""overl , I daresav Lady Lydia curled her lip scornfully. The only taxi-driver in London. and dom during 1909, motor-cars were ^"Ik and she was beautiful—look so delightful possibly in the United Kingdom, possessing can you possibly maintain such a number? " woman who stood near "Copology," which is >'ou the story'i "Of course," she said, "if you're afraid of for 311, equal to 27 per cent, of tot that Ferris before. •"Easily enough, pleaBe your Majesty," re­ meant "take the papers from me." ,tf him—perhaps you'd better." the Victoria Cross is Mr. Frederick Hitch, Motor-omnibuses killed 75 people, n» &I 1 "Your money is all right, Lydia," Brown of Chelsea. Mr. Hitch received the coveted plied the prelate, with a cheerful smile. "In The Magistrate: "Do you understand f^neh surgeon w Graham a dark rod. cars 122, horse-tramcars 5, horse-omnil** flashed explained. "I didn't touch your settle­ award for an exceptional act of gallantry at the summer I turn them out upon the hill to Greek? " of'T, *»>'". quite suej "Now I shall stay," he 6aid ; and he and other horse-drawn vehicles 623. ^| ments, vou know." the defence of Rorke's Drift on January 22, grass, and wheni the winter comes I kill and "No, sir; but that is a slang term meaning faster and knifS staved. Thus of the total of fatal accidents ,he cou "Oh!" She laughed again. "Then I 1879. He was serving with the 24th Regi­ eat them." * * * ' take hold' " res,, "\ >-se o* The flirting grew more pronounced after cent, were attributable to mechanic"-" I *<*nmod bis normal * shall have to keep you, I suppose, you great ment (South Wales Borderers) and, in com­ pelled vehicles. ^ that. It seemed almost as if Graham wished Mrs. Humphrey Ward devotes most of her ( * great cry brolo dancing bear! " pany with Private William Allen, who also 6 a i Brown to notice it. At last he did. He leisure and much of her money to philan­ PICKINGS FROM "PUNCH." There were 26,872 non-fatal accidec,- %. She drew him away, smiling all the time. received the V.C., held open the communi­ * :! ; <"' was somet spoke to his wife at once. If he iiad an un­ thropic work. The famous novelist has in­ which 7,149 (equal to 26 per cent.) »f Cured," he Carthwaite stared after them. cation between the hospital and the inner augurated many schemes for the relief of The Chancellor's slighting reference to the motor-cars, 1,346 to motor-omnibuses, 33 »] pleasant thing to do he always did it d Hkc "By Jove!" he said. "By Jove!" And he defence, enabling the wounded to be carried the poor, and some year* ago founded a Law Society in his Budget speech has caused motor-tramcars, 111 to horse-tramc*1*' So , *T othe. promptly. a d banged the table suddenly and laughed. "I across when the Zulus set fire to the "University Settlement" for University grave offence to the members of that institu­ horse-omnibuses, and 13,241 to tr,., Iy»m; lik«1 "Look here, Lydia," he remarked. "I T thatcfaed building. He was very badly hit by tion, who recently hung his portrait there. *f„ " . o think f don't interfere with you much, but—well, see! men and others who could combine theolo­ vehicles. a roughly-made bullet, which inflicted a They would now like to replace the portrait liii.^g to stand _ it's no use beating about the bush. I have But Lady Lydia's husband did not see. gical and other studies with personal atten­ "Lydia," he said, when they reached the fearful gash in his shoulder, no less than 36 tion to the welfare of the poor districts by the Chancellor himself. no doubt of you, of course, and Graham's a ,de pieces of bone being taken away from the around it. Although she is now one of the i »«,.. " ousness ! nice fellow, and I don't wonder that you like conservatory, "you—you've given me a lift. PIONEER MOTORIST KILLED. I 'lliml'i It's jolly good of you. Thanks. I cquldn't wound. When prevented from firing he most widely read of living British novelists, Some time ago "Punch" suggested that a to talk to eaeh other; but there's too much v as served out ammunition during the night. He Mrs. Humphry Ward was nearly thirty n live on you, of course, and so—there's more 0 of it, and -x-ople are l>oginning to say useful invention would be an umbrella which Mr. J. Lyons Sampson, a well-i" *" ;V r," »°° »»i chance of making a living abroad." received the Victoria Cross from Queen Vic­ when her first book was published. This things. You mflt stop it. that's all." would cry out when left behind. Apparently suiting engineer, has. been killed in * rutl w "You can go abroad if you like," said toria at Netley Hospital on being invalided was "Robert Elsmere," which captivated "I shall not stop it." replied Lady Lydia, experiments have been madeen these lines car accident. j^s businessJ Lady Lydia, "but I'm coming too." home. Mr. Hitch was born in 1856, and Mr. Gladstone, who made a great reputation "d tSf- "° ^ "I am going to make you," said Lady through the Kaffir War of 1877-8. and when near Holinwood it is said, ta* ^ "No," said her husband quietly, "not quite * * * the "Evening .News": the Lydia. passing a traction engine ran into a [**• ^, Mv Power of all. If you will not take a hint, I must The "youngest" old ladies -of Los Angeles mvself "Lost, on Tuesday night, 28th June, at road, with the result that the y'fj'j*! 8 - )Rt tha She seized him by the sides of his jacket, me half mT speak to Graham. 1 don't want to quarrel have organised a club. They call themselves Shepherd's duet, a small packet of papers forced into the traction engine at rigW * -^M *aitif A GREAT STORY-TELLER. 8 or with him. I like the chap. But " He and pulled herself on tiptoe, and held up her the Jolly Old Ladies. They are the 1 "Soj-, ' me, The famous American orator and after- (list of furniture on ear, name on collar, Mr. Sampson was thrown out, sustain" ? ^1 me d stretched hie great arms- uueonsciouslv. "1 face. ieT "o'sibil " "«- "youngest" old ladies beca.use they boast Sam Glenroy, co. of 'Era.' Answers to the injuries that he died about an hour l» f [ d wams v fo dinner speaker, Mr. Chauncey M. Depew, is it •Souttruth h "?? ' don't say that it's your fault, but about their age, bubble with optimism, and name of Bob; finder rewarded." cottage hospital. The chauffeur was noi 8aid now on a visit to this country. He is get­ (<!\ • 'n n "Because I was a fool," said her hus­ ness, disaster, or death is strictly pro­ hlel , mer8 the hardest steel with gold aud silver. George Washington as first President, at the tume. Lieutenant-Colonel J. R. Hanson, <*' anei, ? <'d inl band ; and he turned on his heel and left hibited." "As like attracts like, sweet, Cl, opening of the World's Fair at Chicago, and «»3or ,°'y of his ' Among the Chinese and the Turks these two tender sentiments often expressed, mould a (Territorials) Durham Light '"^"whire, ^ her. She sat biting the feathers of her fan upon other occasions of world-wide import­ or a Uess secrets arc guarded well. Apprentices, be­ character of sweetness and tenderness. Be "A. Lindsay started by deep cutting ie now in camp near Richmond, * /„nd ^ | ? " in ,l **P for several minutes. Then she laughed ance. He is a delightful story-teller, and »o,,n^ the desert fore they are taken for either trade, must missed, and after a seaich was harshly, and went to find Graham. She told one of his best stories is against himself. He jolly at all times and resolve never to look Bridges to the ropes, and followed up with swear a fearful oath to reveal nothing of dead on the Richmond soil links. him the conversation, and he frowned was pointed out to a little boy as "the glum." a string of braces, taken indiscriminately slowlv. what passes in the workshop. These appren­ from both bowlers."—"Saturday Post." not d tices, furthermore, must belong to families world [s greatest story-teller." Next time * • • "He's quite right," he said. "I'll go." that little boy saw Mr. Depew he ran up and Persian girls do not go to school, but re­ Another time, Linsday should provide his «J of standing, must pay a large sum by way of u "Go!" cried Lady Lydia in astonish­ own braces, or string, or whatever it is he _ *' j- , have oner guarantee, and must furnish certificates of said, "I know you.'' "Well, my little man, main at home with their mothers. H they ment. and who am I?" "My papa says," was the have been receiving some lessons from the affects. "Go." he repeated. "You see—I suppose good character and honesty. These secrets have been, handed down faithfully from one serious reply, "that you're the biggest liar "laleh" of their brothers, that is all they you'll think I'm afraid of him, but it isn't on earth." will ever be taught. It is exceedingly rare, generation to another for hundreds of years. WATEE-ON-THE-BBAIN. K EATING^ that. It's—he's such a thundering good even among the daughters of the wealthy and a"ds T"1*! chap. He'd do the fair thing by me, aud I powerful, to find a girl who can read or The "Daily Mirror" on the divining-rod: haveu't done the fair thing by him, and No fewer than 1,916,161 Suffolk eggs have " If people don't git out of the way when write. But they are taught to play on the "On several occasions the thick end of the POWDER so " been dealt with during the past six months by shouted at, you should assume they're either deaf lute, to overlook the servants, to prepare stick rose up and struck the operator on the "I do not reckon, of course," said Lady the Framlingham and District Agricultural or blind," said the coroner at Apethorpe, tea, coffee, and sherbert, and especially to do head. On these spots, he asserted, water Lvdia. Northamptonshire, to the driver of a van which would be found fifty feet down." Co-operative Soeietv-an increase of nearly fine needlework and embroidery. In this l ran over and killed un cid man. \ verdict of b 1 lie I said- . "Oh, you!" He laughed savagely. "Don't naif a million on last year's figures. last respect the Persian girls are quite His head, even at the swollen spots, can't think I'm such a fool as to that you " Accidental death ' was returned. superior. From their ninth year the girls Su nppoM Chief Boatswain John Peain was gazetted have been as thick as that. 4*0 I>posec must never go out of the house unveiled. So care. I don't believe you care two straws recently a lieutenant in his Majesty's Fleet, The Japanese M.P.'s who are visiting England wills the law and custom. They from that for anvone but vour pretty self. Even if and Corporal II. G. Garbett, of the Cameron will be entertained at Hampton Court on July 22 time give all their time and all their "At half-time the visitors fell off," says you did--I'm a bit of a fool over you. but— Highlander*, was gazetted as second lieutenant by Mr. Lewis Hiircourt, First Commissioner of thoughts to dress. the "Field," in reporting a polo match. A but I'm not a blackguard, and—well, I dare­ in the West India Regiment- Works, on behalf of the Government most unfortunate accident.