Non-Profit Organization U.S. Postage PAID Montclair, NJ The Academy News Permit 180 Volume XXXIV, Issue 5 Montclair Kimberley Academy’s Student-Run Newspaper January 2009 Inside Law and Order at the Upper School Inside the Executive Committee and Honor Council Giri Nathan ‘09 News Editor With any sort of decision- leads to a letter detailing the inci- conveyed to the Honor Council. making body, a little ambiguity is dent being put into the student’s file. Academic dishonesty encompasses inevitable; that’s just the nature of If, however, A is considered serious everything from cheating on a test Winter Extravaganza Warms any group that’s highly concerned enough to warrant outside consid- to plagiarism to collaborating on an Hearts with confidentiality. At the Upper eration, it’s shipped to one of two independent assignment—essen- Page 2 School, our judiciaries maintain destinations: 1) the Honor Council tially, anything strictly involving student involvement (which is rare or 2) the Executive Committee. schoolwork. Personal dishonesty is among high schools) and have tried Each of these has its own a less concrete category; it’s harder to make their methods and messag- constitution, so to speak: the Honor to define but it generally deals with es as publicly visible as possible, Council oversees the Honor Code, lying and minor cases of stealing. but a little clarification might still while the Executive Committee If, for example, a student commits be in order. On the same illuminat- deals with the Code of Conduct. The academic dishonesty and proceeds ing note, Dean of Students Lauren distinction between the two, can to lie about it when confronted, it Lambert recently released disciplin- be summed up as “‘Honor-related becomes an issue of both academic ary data that lends some interesting versus not-honor-related,’” as Mrs. and personal dishonesty. insight into our MKA microcosm. Lambert circularly put it—which is If A is considered less seri- To untangle these behind- to say the line can be fuzzy at times. ous among Honor offenses, and/or the-scenes workings, it’s helpful In fact, what we now know as the the student is very cooperative and to track the voyage of some given Honor Code formerly fit under the understanding about the whole or- offense: Offense A, for the sake of umbrella of the Code of Conduct deal, the case can be dealt with by Model UN Adventures argument. If A is deemed relatively up until the 2004-2005 school year, an Honor Board, which consists of Page 5 minor, it’s then just the judgment when it was set aside as its own 3 members of the Council and is call of Mrs. Lambert and Head of document. The Honor Council was generally a less serious affair. Oth- School Dr. David Flocco. They de- also introduced that year to attend to erwise, A proceeds to trial with the termine the appropriate course of these newly-defined guidelines. full Honor Council, which consists action (whether that includes pun- Revisiting A, after that brief of both students from each grade ishment or not) among themselves, tangent: If A is a question of aca- level and faculty members. A mini- demic or personal dishonesty, it’s and their word is final. Usually this Continued on Page 3 Recession Hits Survival Shop Prices Up, Balance Down Phil Reisen Editor-In-Chief You Are Supposed to Know The candy bubble too has surer Laura Merriman. The reces- year. Merriman is confident that the Who Mickey Rourke is Now burst. The U.S. has officially been sion has changed that, and accord- Survival Shop will make a “respect- Page 7 in a recession since December 2007, ing to Merriman, the original prices able” profit, and says that the Shop and the implications have now come of goods have risen “dramatically.” is taking prudent measures. One to the Survival Shop. The Shop’s balance sheet is “down of these measures to reduce costs The Survival Shop opened over 50% compared to this time last is the process of scrutinizing pur- its doors over ten years ago with the year.” That means that the Shop is chases through customer satisfac- intention of providing students with making only half of what it did last tion. Senior Georgina Ellison notes a snack before sports practices or year, which reduces its purchasing that although the price changes leaving for home. Over the years, it power and the profit that it will give have caused some inconveniences, has expanded to cover both morn- to each grade. To combat not only “at the end of the day, the money ings and afternoons, and has be- loss of quality, variety, and contri- is going back to the grades, so I come a regular part of any student’s butions to each grade, the Shop has can’t complain.” The plight of the schedule. The food for the survival raised its prices for the first time in Survival Shop, although relatively shop is purchased in bulk at Costco at least six years. Drinks and Candy minor, underscores the larger eco- and sold by PAMKA for a small have gone from 50 cents to 75, Cup nomic problems around the world profit. This profit is subsequently of Noodles have increased from 50 and their far-reaching effects. Noth- divided among the four classes. By cents to one dollar, and other prices ing is safe- not even Mini M&Ms. Broadway and the the time a senior class has graduat- have increased as well.These in- Recession ed, it will have received a grand to- creases have increased the Shop’s PAMKA members Laura Merriman, Emilie Page 7 tal of about $8000 from those sales, profits an average of 16% each day, Wong, Tricia Paolucci, and Patty Strain contributed to this article. according to Survival Shop Trea- still not what it was making last News, Page 2 The Academy News January 2009 Senior Class Launches Holiday The Survival Shop Tradition Welcome to The Survival Shop! Tyler Daniels ‘10 We’re open for business and ready Staff Writer to dish out advice to help you with December the 12th, the se- dents and Athletic Liaison Mrs. and it soon became apparent that the your problems… no worry too big, nior class held its first-ever Winter Mr. Lambert both took the floor dur- Extravaganza was more than just a no queries too small. Holiday Extravaganza. Organized ing the concert. However, they were talent show: it was unifying event So…what’s on your mind? as a benefit concert for the upcom- not even the two most popular Lam- that seemed to bring out the best in ing Prom, it proved to be a night of berts of the evening. It was nine- people. Even though more than one bonding friendship and good music, and seven-year-olds Sophie and act had unexpected blunders, there Every day I stand in line, get my where each act brought something Abby Lambert, whose renditions was never an uncomfortable mo- food, and walk out to the main new and exciting for the audi- ment. The audience was patient cafeteria, where I stand awkwardly ence. and encouraging and forgiving for what seems like forever until I When students first en- to say the least, and the evening see where my friends are sitting. I tered the Weiss Auditorium was about simply enjoying each feel like everyone’s staring at me that Friday night they saw their other’s company. The concert and it makes me nervous. What school in (literally) a different concluded with a performance should I do? Sincerely, Dork with light. Upon entering they en- by the well-liked senior band a Spork countered a festively decorated Dubious Pastry who, after the auditorium filled with lights, completion of their scheduled Dear Dork, bows, and instruments. At 8 number, performed an encore You have three options. PM, the festivities began with a by popular demand. 1) Go in to get your food mariachi-style performance of According to senior class with a friend or group of friends. “Feliz Navidad.” As the night president Thomas Mazzeo, ev- From there, you can either stand continued the Extravaganza Sophomore Casey Wows Audience erything that evening simply awkwardly looking for a table with proved to be entertaining in its own “worked out.” The diversity of all someone, which might make you eclectic way—in one act, sopho- of “Jingle Bells” and “Rudolph The the different numbers blended well feel better, or start your own table. more Rafi Bildner performed Bach Red Nose Reindeer” won the hearts to produce an overall enjoyable Fri- 2) Find a friend who is on his violin, and in another, fellow of the audience members. day night, not to mention a profit- bringing lunch from home, and go sophomore Jackson Murray spun an While some bands were able outcome for the 2009 Senior sit with him or her until everyone electronic remix live on his laptop. undoubtedly professionals at these Prom. Mazzeo then went on to say else starts to come back to your The majority of the performers were types of gigs, others appeared to be that he hopes the success of the Ex- table with their food. Leave them MKA’s own students. The Lambert more impromptu. Either way, the travaganza will be continued next to it with your friend with the family most definitely proved that audience seemed to enjoy every- year in the hands of the Class of home lunch and go and get your they are not stage-shy; Dean of Stu- thing. As the evening progressed, 2010. food. When you come out, you will know where to go. MKA Strings: Pitch Perfect Direction 3) Realize that no one is Rafi Bildner ‘11 looking at you or cares what Staff Writer you are doing. Embrace the As you walk down the Dr. Upper School Strings Program is Parks competition as well.” awkwardness. Stand there looking Peter R. Greer Arts Wing, beautiful how unique it is from that of other One of the most exciting around and don’t worry about it. sounds can be heard echoing from schools. As Hadjipetkov explained, things about the MKA Strings Pro- Good Luck, The Survival Shop the music rooms. One sound sure “I think we do not have the tradi- gram is its annual performance at to stop people in their tracks is that tional high school orchestra mold in New York’s Carnegie Hall, which of a Beethoven symphony or a Viv- terms of our repertoire. While many offers students pre-K to 12th an op- aldi concerto played by the Upper other high school orchestras play portunity to play on a world famous Dear Survival Shop, School String Orchestra. lighter and more popular pieces… stage. However, as the program en- Random people are always In 1999, when Director we study mostly classical pieces ters its tenth year under Hadjipetk- blocking my locker. They normally Dimitri Hadjipetkov took over the from the standard repertoire, philo- ov’s direction, Hadjipetkovhas said, move over a little when I say MKA Strings Program, there were sophical works with deeper mean- “As the program grew we were in excuse me, but I still have to push about 30 people enrolled in all three need of a bigger hall. With traffic, through or step over them every campuses. Now, a decade later, “The program the Carnegie Hall concerts often time I go to get my stuff. They look the program has more than tripled. tend to be a very hectic experience annoyed now whenever I have to Hadjipetkov essentially founded the has more than for many families, and also don’t get through. Sincerely, There’s a program when he came to MKA. allow as many people as we would Blocker by my Locker According to Hadjipetkov, “When I tripled in size” like in the MKA community to see started at MKA in 1999, the Strings the concerts. This year, we are ex- Dear Locker, Program had about 20 students in ings that have withstood the test of perimenting with NJPAC’s beauti- If you are being polite, then they the Middle School, five at Brook- time.” Hadjipetkov works to instill ful Victoria Theatre, which is per- really don’t have a reason to be side, and five at the Upper School… a sense of appreciation for the mu- fect in terms of size for us and also giving you attitude. If it really Currently, we have close to 100 stu- sic that his students play “My goal closer to home. This should allow bothers, you just put all your stuff dents on all three campuses, includ- is to make learning a classical piece many more people to come see our in your backpack at the beginning ing 32 at Brookside, about 40 at the of music fun, and in the future, I am incredible concert.” of the day. Chances are that they Middle School and 25 at the Upper hoping that all my students will have Led by an innovative direc- don’t care as much as you think, School.” a deep appreciation and understand- tor, the MKA Strings Program has though. Don’t worry about it. Good Senior Katie DeKeizer, who ing for classical music,” he said. reached new heights and has pro- Luck, The Survival Shop has been a member of the Upper The MKA Strings Program vided hundreds of students with School String Orchestra for four provides its participants many op- profound opportunities. The de- The Survival Shop is column an- years, explained that “the Strings portunities for education and perfor- but at NJPAC on April 25 will be swering any type of questions from Program has grown in size, and each mance. Junior Sue Abuhadba said an exciting event for MKA strings the student body. The column is year, people seem to be more inter- “the Strings Program has opened up and one that the MKA community anonymously written by a student ested in it, which is really great.” many opportunities for me as a mu- shouldn’t miss. Ticket information not on the staff of the newspaper. Some members of the or- sician, such as playing at Carnegie can be obtained by emailing Dimitri Any questions can be sent to Acad- chestra, and the director himself, Hall in New York City every spring, Hadjipetkov at dhadjipetkov@mka. [email protected]. felt that what is so great about the and competing in the Music in the org. News, Page 3 The Academy News January 2009 Inside the Executive Committee and Honor Council Right: A flow chart representing he path an MKA student follows after violating rules. Bottom: graphs representing the past three year case history for the Honor Council and Executive Committee. (Graphics by Phil Reisen)

Executive Committee Cases Honor Council Cases From From The Last 3 Years The Last 3 Years

11 Harassment Personal Dishonesty: 8 8 Conduct Unbecoming Academic Dishonesty: 31 6 Drugs and Alcohol Plagiarism: 9 11 Code of Conduct Total: 48 36 Total

Continued from Page 1 duct unbecoming, drug & alcohol with some unsavory connotations. and up-to-date. High school admin- mum of 7 students and 2 faculty use and—or, more philosophically, However—and as a member of the istrations are so often perceived as members is necessary for a quo- “how we treat each other, how we Honor Council I can attest to this draconian, punishment-doling ma- rum. present ourselves, and how we treat fact—these trials are meant to fos- chines, but this feature serves as a To shed some light on the ourselves,” respectively. The first ter open conversation, comprehen- safeguard, in a sense; by keeping sort of cases the Honor Council gen- and third are self-explanatory, but sion of what students involved, our rules better erally deals with, Mrs. Lambert pro- “conduct unbe- exactly oc- retain their relevance. vided data from 2005-2008 school coming” could “Trials are curred and how And once all the numbers years. Over this three-year span, 48 bear defining. It’s to best remedy are taken into consideration, these Honor-related cases came to trial, 9 the conveniently serious, to be it. Committee offenses really are, as Mrs. Lambert of which were specifically linked to abbreviated ver- members gen- characterized them, “occasional plagiarism, 31 of which were other sion of “conduct sure, but there erally use “dif- bumps in the road,” just “rare oc- instances of academic dishones- unbecoming of an ficult questions currences.” To date, 11 cases have ty, and 8 of which were related to Academy student is a general in order to get faced either the Executive Commit- personal dishonesty. Mrs. Lambert or detrimental to to the bottom tee, Honor Council, or an Honor ranked cheating and collaborating the reputation of atmosphere of of a situation.” Board this school year. There have as the most common offenses, fol- the Academy,” Trials are se- been 10 incidents that have caused lowed by plagiarism, personal dis- which in practice understanding.” rious, to be Dr. Flocco and Mrs. Lambert to put honesty, and—in very few cases— serves as a “catch- sure, but there letters in students files by them- theft. all” for anything is a general at- selves. All of this indicates a low- Back to the flowchart: if that doesn’t explicitly fall under mosphere of understanding. This er rate than previous years. Mrs. A is a Code of Conduct issue, it’s other major categories. is largely due to the fact that stu- Lambert acknowledged that there instead passed on to the Executive In the same three-year span, dents are judged among their peers, is ultimately an inherent challenge Committee (which likewise consists the Executive Committee has faced which is a distinguishing detail of for each of us at the Upper School: of students and faculty, and requires 36 total cases: 11 harassment cases, our school judiciaries. Mrs. Lam- weighing the “expectations we have a quorum of at least 4 of each) to 8 conduct unbecoming, 6 drug & al- bert emphasized the importance of for ourselves in balance with all the be determined in trial. The Code of cohol, and 11 other violations of the student participation in these de- pressures we deal with,” but she Conduct is a dizzyingly diverse list, Code of Conduct. cisions, noting that “students are emphasized that for the most part but Mrs. Lambert cited three main It should be noted both of often the sharpest critics” and that we rise to that challenge honorably. offenses with respect to the Execu- these roads end in “trial,” which is their presence ensures that the deci- (and Honorably.) tive Committee: harassment, con- admittedly an intimidating word sion-making process stays dynamic Opinion, Page 4 The Academy News January 2009 Talkin’ Slang ‘Round the World News Briefs Chris Stavitsky ‘09 When I woke up Saturday Issue Contributor games that brow off your prowess Midterms morning, I didn’t want a cup of cof- wouldn’t want to use within 500 feet at inserting the word “bro” (which fee. I wanted a cup of joe. Is there of Yankee Stadium. The diction- is, of course, slang referring to a They are over! Wooo! a difference (there are a number ary definitions of these words don’t good friend) into random words of theories ranging from “joe” as matter in their slang context, and at the appropriate places to create a mispronunciation of the coffee although they might defy the con- new ones—which may or may not Stricter Morning capital Java, to “joe” as the drink of ventions of the English language, take on amusing double meanings. the working man – the average Joe) nobody seems to care. Different It’s fun to play the game with peo- Meeting Rules between the two? Maybe not— but subcultures have different sets of ple who don’t know it—you never Starting this semester, the I’ve been slanging it up ever since jargon; sometimes words tunnel out brow how they’ll react. I myself doors of the auditorium I stopped frequenting the stuffy old of their set and work their way into have a bropensity to start playing doors will close at 9:20 coffee shop and started chilling at this game whenever, wherever the in an effort to keep the this bangin’ new java joint. After a urge strikes—it once hit me when I “It’s hella easy to meeting running on time. sip of bean juice I started to think was talking to an admissions officer about slang and its origins. The first over-season your during a college session. I wasn’t thing made clear to me was that particularly brolific at that session, Mr. Jeremiah slang is all about context. I’m will- conversations” but it was fun just the same. For ing to bet that many times in your brose of you who think this game Leaves MKA life you’ve heard a word or phrase mainstream conversation. Plenty of is dumb, you’ll brow to love it, trust After mid-term that doesn’t seem to make any sense. words in heavy use today are taken me—the reason you hate it is be- examination week, beloved You probably asked the speaker from the surfer subculture (though cause you haven’t tried it. You can Spanish teacher Mr. what it meant. You found out—in just as many, like “gnarly,” or “am- even play this when you travel to Jeremiah left the MKA that instant, you became free to use ped,” are ignored or even scorned France—just say breaux. community to, in the words whatever sweet new word you’d by the general population), such as I encourage the use of slang, of Dr. Flocco, “assume full- learned—the alternate context the the simple yet elegant “dude,” and as long as it’s shared freely, just be- time daddy duties.” He will speaker used the word in. the endless variations on the word cause it brings people together. Each be sorely missed. Slang often varies by sub- “brother.” Said variations are some- year a number of new words are culture or region. For example, there what like the Chinese syllable “ma” added to the dictionary; a good num- are a number of regional variations mentioned in the last issue of the ber of those are slang. Yet, like with Want to Write that essentially replace the word Academy News—the smallest nu- anything else, moderation is key. “very.” They aren’t always gram- ances can change the meaning of It’s hella easy to over-season your for the Academy matically correct, but they’re hella the word (“bruh” may be different conversations with slang words— News? fun to use (SoCal). You have to be from “brah,” which may be differ- and to someone who doesn’t have careful when you use slang; it’s ent from “bro,” etc.). Some people a hella good attendance record at The Academy News wants mad annoying if you want to com- love to immerse themselves in slang Hella Club meetings, it can be hella YOU! Come to our next municate something and the person like this while others may find it te- annoying. Just make sure you learn meeting on Tuesday, you’re speaking to has to keep ask- dious. to use the slang correctly or people February 3rd in Room 11 if ing you to repeat yourself (“mad” Nobody can deny that slang will look at you funny. But I would you are interested in is the most common in our area). is fun, brough, especially when hella never get caught using slang writing! Free food! “Wicked” is a term you probably you’re in the brow. You can play incorrectly. Musician’s Story Strikes a The Academy News Staff: Chord in Hearts Editors-in-Chief: Chris McEwen ‘11 Katie Davis ‘09 Jake Perl ‘10 Brian Perlmutter ‘11 Philip Reisen ‘09 Brian Perlmutter ‘11 Staff Writer Managing Editor: Sheridan Watson ‘10 The Chicago Tribune re- der to help Lang Lang reach the top. Rob Gelberg ‘10 Copy Editor: ferred to Lang Lang as “the big- Although China’s classical music Laura Ovadia ‘09 News Editors: gest, most exciting keyboard talent program is based almost completely Issue Contributors: encountered in many years.” When on competition, Lang Lang eventu- Mike Dunn ‘09 Isabel Glusman ‘11 still a teenager, he substituted for the ally learns that when he breaks free Giri Nathan ‘09 Chris Stavitsky ‘09 famous Andre Watts, receiving rave from this focus on winning and los- Opinions Editor: Chelsea Strickland ‘10 reviews from critics and a standing ing, he is able to appreciate the ‘true Ian Pelse ‘10 ovation from thirty thousand peo- essence’ of music. Even though at Photo Contributor: ple. Since then he has performed times our lives may seem taxing, Arts Editor: Marta Garibaldi ‘09 Melissa Wong ‘09 piano at the White House and the Journey of a Thousand Miles makes Faculty Advisor: Kremlin; he played for the queen of us realize how extremely fortunate Sports Editor: Tim Lynch Ashley Krones ‘09 England, and six times for President we really are. The hardships of Lang Printer: Hu Jintao of China. In Lang Lang’s Lang’s life, including a nearly abu- Technology Consultant: Park Press Printing autobiography Journey of a Thou- sive father, financial insecurity, and Ian Pelse ‘10 sand Miles, co-written with Da- the immigration to a completely dif- Staff Writers: vid Ritz, he explains his transition ferent country, show the pettiness of Rafi Bildner ‘11 from a boy in the slums of China most of our problems. By fighting Joanna Capela ‘09 to a world-renowned pianist. The through these difficulties and fo- Tyler Daniels ‘10 Cultural Revolution had quenched cusing on his passion for the piano, Erin Furlong ‘10 many Chinese musicians’ aspira- Lang Lang is able to completely tions. Once it ended, Lang Lang’s transform his life. After finally ac- Letters to the editors can be sent to academynewsmka@yahoo. parents then channeled their goals quiring his dreams, he desires to com or can be dropped in Mr. Lynch’s mailbox. Letters may be into their one child. Both of his par- go on to help others, and becomes edited for clarity or content. We reserve the right to refuse the ents had been in this situation, result- the youngest UNICEF ambassador. publication of obscene or otherwise inappropriate material. ing in extreme pressure to become Lang Lang’s story is inspiring and ‘Number One.’ His family sacrifices compelling, and is definitely worth Thank you, nearly everything they have in or- reading. The Academy News Staff Humor, Page 5 The Academy News January 2009 Captured in a Word Model UN Adventures Rob Gelberg ‘10 Chelsea Strickland ‘10 Managing Editor Issue Contributor Let’s face it: charisma is word quote. It is one word repeated On the third week of this gry announcement in which guilty overrated. Moreover, memorization in a chant by a stadium full of foot- past December, thousands of high delegates were to scolded for their is overrated. The two put together is ball fans who love an underdog. It school students from across the actions. Fortunately, once the se- just redundant. Shakespeare could has made it on to the list simply be- world gathered at the Sheraton curity department felt that the del- get away with writing three-minute- cause to ignore the stadium’s chant Hotel in Boston, Massachusetts to egates were prepared to once again long speeches for characters with would be downright mean. The meet new people, spend a day tour- handle the privilege of note passing, spectacular vocabularies, but he scene gets me every time. ing Harvard’s campus and college the paging system was reinstated in died like fifty years ago and the art 6. Rosebud. town, and undertake the daunting various assemblies (except the His- of the speech died with him. Now, a Spoken by: Orson Welles in task of passing mock resolutions torical General Assembly, whose simple word is all it takes to make paging privileges were sadly sus- Citizen Kane on worldwide issues. Model United your point. Don’t believe me? Here Nations, a four-day, frenzied, fun- pended for the majority of the ses- Movie critics and film buffs are the top ten one-word movie filled conference, provides students sion). alike have called this the most fa- quotes of all time. every year with an opportunity to Model U.N. also provided mous single word in cinema his- represent assigned worldwide coun- participants with invaluable learn- 1. Freedom! tory. Unfortunately for them, I’m a tries, and let their inner diplomats ing experiences and chances to use Spoken by: Mel Gibson in sucker for sports movies and Scot- emerge in a sea of heated debate and leadership skills. With over two Braveheart tish people. Still, the faint whisper numerous caucuses, both moderat- hundred different countries repre- Mel Gibson might be a of “rosebud” and the image of the ed and unmoderated. This year, the sented in the larger committees, the drunken anti-Semitic bigot, but let’s snow globe falling out of his hand is topics open for deliberation among page system was often disorganized face it: the guy makes good mov- beautiful in it’s own right. Clocking the various committees ranged from due to the multitude of notes coming ies. As Gibson’s Scottish rebel is in at number five, the greatest movie missile defense from the vari- bound, quartered, and emasculated, quote of all time. systems and ous delegates. he screams out not for mercy, but “Erin learned 7. Aa-ooo! governance of Thankfully, in for love of his country as his people. Spoken By: Really buff ex- the Internet, the case of the Though screaming out “Freedom!” quickly that not all tras in 300 to polygamy Special Po- resulted only in his beheading, it Granted, it’s technically not and family litical and De- still makes for good cinema. delegates are to be a word. Still, “Aa-ooo” is an ac- planning. Cou- colonization 2. Stella! ceptable response to “What is your rageous del- trusted.” Committee, Spoken by: Marlon Brando occupation?” in many southern Eu- egates wishing junior Erin in A Streetcar Named Desire ropean city-states. And anything to participate in the ever-evolving Furlong put her leadership skills to Forget Justin Timberlake. spoken by three hundred angry sol- debates in their respective commit- good use and quickly became the Brando introduced sexy to the Amer- diers with CGI muscles has got to tees are encouraged by the commit- prominent authority figure in the ican people in this historic movie. make this list. tee leaders to approach the micro- paging inner circle, or the “queen After a drunken rant, Brando’s wife 8. Whoa. phones at the front of the rooms and of the pages” as she was known runs out from the poker game into Spoken by: Keanu Reeves in share their opinion on whatever top- among her loyal subjects. How- the room above, and Brando moans ever, Erin learned quickly that not The Matrix ic is being discussed. Adventurous out her name in a now iconic movie delegates are encouraged by their all delegates are to be trusted. When Keanu Reeves was unfortu- moment. Next time your lover runs peers to approach the microphone asked by a classmate to deliver an nately born without a personality, out on you, moan out her name and and share original raps about weap- important note to Puerto Rico, Erin and yet he gave Neo so much char- maybe she’ll come back to you, ons of mass destruction, or to pro- combed the aisles multiple times acter in The Matrix Trilogy. The too. pose working drafts of resolution looking for the elusive Puerto Rican fact that he didn’t win the Oscar for papers for organizations such as the delegation. Puzzled, Erin stopped 3. Wilson! Best Actor and Best Supporting Ac- People’s Organization of Registered to ask a fellow page if he knew Spoken by: Tom Hanks in tor (one for Neo, the other for Mr. Net Enforcers (P.O.R.N.E.). of Puerto Rico’s whereabouts, to Cast Away Anderson) is beyond me. His per- Those who are less inclined which he enlightened Erin to the Few things are more beau- formance can only be described in to surrender to their diplomatic alter fact that the United Nations did not tiful than the love between a man one word: Whoa. egos can find other ways of amusing recognize Puerto Rico as a nation. and his volleyball. Admit it, if you 9. Bueller. themselves during the twenty hours Although bristling with anger at the were stuck on an island by yourself, Spoken By: Ben Stein in Fer- total spent in conference, as those clever classmate who sent her on you’d talk to anything with a face. ris Buheler’s Day Off who attended Model U.N. this past her journey, Erin left Boston with Wilson was certainly a good lis- December discovered. The page sys- newly discovered information, as tener, but unfortunately not a good Talk about a varied re- tem, in which delegates volunteer to did the majority of delegates who swimmer. As he floated out to sea, sume. Ben Stein has been everything walk up and down the aisles pass- participated in Model U.N. Tom Hanks screams out the name from a presidential speechwriter to ing notes between countries, offered Although twenty hours of of his adopted best friend. We feel a game show host to an eye-drop many delegates a form of entertain- rigorous committee sessions your pain, Tom. spokesman. Yet his entire working career will forever be immortalized ment throughout the conferences. can be trying at times, delegates 4. Adrian! by one droning role-call. Suck it up, However, as various committee par- are rewarded for their hard work Spoken By: Sylvester Stalone Ben. You’re famous. ticipants quickly discovered, abuse and concentration in the culminat- in Rocky I 10. Ricky! of the page system, as judged by the ing event of the Model U.N. experi- Rocky lost his title fight. Spoken By: Cuba Gooding Model U.N. Department of Secu- ence: the delegate dance. Formerly Boo-hoo. And even though he was rity, was not always tolerated. This suit-clad delegates who dominated beaten into a human hamburger, Jr. in Boyz n da Hood “abuse” came in many forms; de- the debates in their respective com- Adrian loved him anyway. As he is This quote just barely makes manding pages to pass notes to fake mittees traded in their pinstripes for crowded by reporters, Sly screams the top ten, beating out “Jenny!” countries, sending raunchy love party clothes for the delegate rave out for her in a nearly unintelligible from Forrest Gump. The only rea- notes to other delegates, or passing that took place on the final night of moan. Adrienne runs after him, even son it beats out that quote is because short, succinct messages such as Model U.N. Though some delegates after her security hat falls off. That’s Ricky got shot and killed right after “you’re hot” to certain college-aged definitely had a more memorable love, people. Cuba called out for him. Out of re- committee directors. Notes such as night than others, the dance was a spect for good old Ricky, his name 5. Rudy! these were severely frowned upon fitting way to end a weekend of full- makes the list. Spoken by: Notre Dame Uni- by the Model U.N. security officers fledged, unrestrained, diplomatic fun. versity in Rudy and resulted in the abrupt suspen- sion of the page system and an an- To be fair, this isn’t a one- Arts, Page 6 The Academy News January 2009 8 Fashion Myths Sparking Music Debunked Trends Joanna Capela ‘09 Erin Furlong ‘10 Staff Writer Staff Writer There are certain fashion let it slide. Overall, don’t let leather I’ll admit it, I’m a hypocrite. and the final mix “The O.C. Mix 6: rules you’ve learned to live by your scare you; it does wonders when Sure, when my friends obsessed Covering Our Tracks”. Along with entire stylish life. But fashion is worn correctly. over what Seth and Summer had its soundtracks, the show chose to fast- paced. Before you know it, argued about in the latest episode I include live performances during what’s old is new, what’s in is out, nodded and rolled my eyes, scoffed the actual episodes from an impres- and now…what was out is certainly at their interest in something so sive list of bands including Rooney, in. This season I have seen more ta- trivial, and went back to a different The Killers, The Walkmen, Modest boo fashion errors making a come- conversation. But while I laughed at Mouse, The Thrills, Death Cab for back than ever before, so be daring their devotion to these meaningless Cutie, and T.I.. As well as includ- and brave the bold! Here are some characters and their over-dramatized ing actual performances the show conventional beliefs that are now lives, I knew exactly what had hap- was also the site of many single de- total myths: pened in that episode and the rea- buts, among them the Beastie Boys’ “Ch-Check It Out”, Gwen Stefani’s Myth 1: Sequins are for sons behind it. While some teenage The “Cool”, Imogen Heap’s “Hide and nighttime only girls might watch shows like O.C., One Tree Hill, Gossip Girl, Seek”, U2’s “Sometimes You Can’t Truth: They can be eye-catching and 90210, for the hot actors or to Make It On Your Own” and Cold- for day when layered with plain ba- study whatever fashion trends have play’s “Fix You” as well as the song sics. Sequins are a personal favorite You don’t need to be made an appearance on the heroine “Turn Me On” by The Shins which because they are glamorous, but I Stella from Project that week, I’m sure almost none of was on the show before the album think they can work for day. How- Runway to use letha them are solely tuning in for the was even released. The show was ever, I recommend keeping silhou- music. One the other hand I would also a jumping-off point for the ettes simple and easy. Also, don’t Myth 6: No white after be willing to bet music supervisor, go overboard; try only a touch of Labor Day. that every single “The phenomena Alexandra Patsa- sequins. person reading vas, who had pre- Truth: How did this even come to this article has, has sold over a viously only been Myth 2: Never mix denim be? Don’t bother checking the cal- at one point or the music supervi- with denim. endar when you comb your closet. another, heard a million copies of sor for a television Truth: Although we’ve often heard Winter white, which is a more mut- catchy song they show from the 90’s that jeans and jean jackets add up ed version of bleach white, is perfect didn’t recog- The O.C. Mixes” called Roswell, and to a farmer look, you can sport a for the chilly months! Just cause it’s nize during a commercial and then a legal drama Boston Public. After jean jacket with jeans as long as you cold out does not mean you have to proceeded to the internet to search becoming a celebrated supervisor on vary the wash of the two pieces. Try suffer in black. Even just a touch of out the song and artist. The power The O.C. she now currently super- wearing skinny white jeans with a white with all black (see Myth 4) of advertising has absolutely been vises the music for the shows Grey’s light-wash belted jacket, or black can add a touch of humor and en- proven to advance music careers or Anatomy, Private Practice, Chuck, jeans with a classic blue bomber. ergy to your outfit. Just remember to gain a wider audience for the art- Gossip Girl, Rescue Me, Mad Men, keep accessories seasonally appro- ists (look no further than the chart and Supernatural as well as running Myth 3: Never mix priate by wearing closed toe shoes topping success of M.I.A.’s second Chop Shop Records under Atlantic navy and black. or even booties. album single “Paper Planes” and its Records. Growing press celebrated the work done by Patsavas and its Truth: This is probably the most Myth 7: Horizontal stripes use in the trailer for Pineapple Ex- compatibility with The O.C.’s mes- cliché fashion rule, and frankly, it’s make you look fat. press). ridiculous. Cobalt and black is one However, what I think de- sage encouraging other shows in its of my favorite combos, but navy Truth: The secret to horizontal serves a bit more attention is the ef- genre to follow suit, most notably and black screams sophistication. stripes is how you wear them. Skin- fect that a television show’s sound- One Tree Hill and Gossip Girl, both The queen of the little black dress, ny stripes make you look wider, track can have on its demographic of which have also released several Coco Chanel herself, was a fan of while thicker stripes do just the op- and the effect that its demographic mixes from the shows soundtracks. this misunderstood mixture. posite. Also, make sure any hori- can have on the artists featured, In addition One Tree Hill also titles zontally striped clothing you wear specifically the teenage soap opera every episode after the name of a Myth 4: Don’t wear is not tight, even the slightest pull- genre. The O.C. could be viewed as song, and Gossip Girl has created light shoes with dark ing effect paints an ugly picture. the instigator of this trend, a show a fictional band featured on its mix stockings. that drew in most high school age which ties into the back story of a Myth 8: Don’t mix girls and featured an excellent bal- main character. Truth: Black tights are a must, and patterns. are extra chic when worn with a pair ance of previously known alternative Whether you’re a fan of of eye-popping pumps. Give a mini- Truth: Emilio Pucci, (no, not Gu- and pop acts while mixing in emerg- these types of shows or not, the evi- dress a downtown spin with opaque cci) made his fame by mixing crazy ing and under the radar acts (includ- dence shows that they have had a tights and pale pink heels. However, prints. Although it is not usually a ing the band Phantom Planet, whose positive influence on the music in- keep the shoes in mind, all eyes will quiet statement, mixed patterns can song “California” is used as the dustry and have hopefully expand- be drawn downward so be wary of look either fun and playful, or styl- theme). A large amount of reviewers ed the musical tastes of those who scuffs. ish and put-together. Remember that of the show made positive mentions watch the shows. The phenomena Myth 5: Leather is for different patterns should be differ- of how the show’s soundtrack not has sold over a million copies of The punk rockers and ent scales, so if you’re wearing a big only reflected the moods and energy O.C. Mixes and garnered a Grammy bikers only. floral print skirt, your top should be of the show but also fit well with nomination for the second mix from a smaller print like thin pinstripes the age bracket of both the show’s Grey’s Anatomy. With downloads Truth: Leather can be whatever you or small polka dots, and remember characters and the show’s audience, of “Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol make it. A light brown leather jacket to stay in the same general color reflecting creator Josh Schwartz’s increasing from 2,000 to 21,000 with a fur collar can look sporty and scheme. desire that “the music be a character the week it aired on Grey’s Anato- sophisticated, or a motorcycle jacket I’ve set you free (fashion- on the show”. To date The O.C. has my and similar success of the song can look rough and tumble. We all ably speaking anyway). So before put out six mixes from the show’s “Hide and Seek” by Imogen Heap have come to know and love leather tackling your next shopping extrav- soundtrack, including one holi- after playing in The O.C., I think it’s leggings; even though they’re not aganza, forget your old conventions day mix entitled “The O.C. Mix 3: safe to say the practice of excellent technically leather, we’re willing to and remember to break the rules! Have a Very Merry Chrismukkah”, television soundtracks is not a trend to die out soon. Arts, Page 7 The Academy News January 2009 Brad and Jen Fight For Wrestling From Box Office Glory the Ashes Sheridan Watson ‘10 Chris McEwen ‘11 Staff Writer Staff Writer The Curious Case of settings, and the special effects 2008 had a wide range guaranteed. Every location from Benjamin Button is indeed a, shall are enough to wow anyone. They of great performances. Frank Randy’s decrepit New Jersey trailer we say, “different” sort of movie. simply do not make movies like this Langella’s Nixon, Heath Ledger’s to the American Legion hall where Marley & Me is a more “normal” anymore. And for a final punch, I Joker, Sam Rockwell’s tortured he goes to sign autographs is not film, with a loveable dog and a found out that Brad Pitt can actually born-again in Snow Angels, Sally a Hollywood set that glamorizes tearjerker ending. However, it is act. Cate Blanchett, a woman who Hawkins’ cheery teacher in Happy Randy attempt at redemption, but my consensus could do Go Lucky, Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate a real life location that, combined that The anything, is Winslet, and Michael Shannon’s with flawless cinematography, gives Curious Case just as great. work in Revolutionary Road, the film a documentary-like feel. of Benjamin But the real Michelle Williams’ performance in Aronofsky’s use of steadicam shots Button comes kudos goes Wendy and Lucy, and of course Sean are both realistic and make a striking out the victor to Taraji Penn’s brilliant portrayal of Harvey connection between Randy’s need over Marley & B. Henson, Milk were all fantastic displays of to be a performer in life both in and Me in this Brad she took acting. However one performance out of the ring. Pitt – Jennifer a typical of 2008 stuck out for me more than The star of the show, A n i s t o n c l i c h é any other, not just in terms of talent, however, is Rourke. Randy’s own smackdown. Brad Pitt Ages (And De-Ages) mother-type but also in the rawness and emotion career, which peaked in the ‘80s U n l e s s Like a Champ role and turned displayed. I’m talking about Mickey before sputtering out in the ‘90s is you have been living underneath it into a tour-de-force performance. Rourke’s career defining work in a clear parallel to Rourke’s, which a rock for the last four years, Brad The film was adapted from a F. Scott Darren Aronofsky’s The Wrestler. makes scenes, such as a speech he Pitt and Jennifer Aniston divorced Fitzgerald short story about a man Rourke headlines as Randy has at the end, all the more powerful. and Brad went on to find love with who ages backwards. Just include “The Ram” Robinson, whose Little moments stick out too, like someone named Angelina Jolie. a couple of symbols like Hurricane wrestling career peaked in the ‘80s, Randy playing a game of Nintendo Every time any of the three yawn, Katrina, death and love and you is now relegated to smaller shows with a neighborhood kid, or the the whole world knows about it. have got a nice big movie. As for when not working behind the deli way Randy and his “opponents” Therefore, one should be curious Aniston’s kind family flickMarley & counter of a supermarket. After a congratulate one another following over this Christmas’ fight. Although Me, I came out satisfied. Did I leave near-fatal heart attack following a a match forming a sort of surrogate Marley & Me made an estimated bawling like my sister? No. But I particularly brutal match involving family. Randy may have trouble two million dollars more than Brad’s did not feel cheated or significantly a staple gun, Randy is forced to functioning in the real world but he epic, technically it opened on more moved in any way. Maybe it is stop wrestling and confront his will always have a home backstage. screens and therefore The Curious my cold heart, but Marley & Me mortality. In the process he tries The Wrestler is a movie Case did not have a chance. That was not enough to get these tears to develop a relationship with a about performing, limitations, and box office fact does not stop The flowing. Marley & Me was also kindly stripper (Marisa Tomei) and doing what you love for as long as Curious Case of Benjamin Button’s adapted from a memoir, apparently reconnecting with his estranged you can. It sounds like the makings sheer magnificence. It amazed me a bestseller Not to dismiss Aniston’s daughter, Stephanie (Evan Rachel of a Rocky-like story of a comeback that while I was watching the film, movie too greatly, her acting is Wood). Randy tries to make good, but The Wrestler is a very different I never felt like I was watching a actually good, as is Owen Wilson’s. but is tempted back for a rematch kind of film; it’s mournful yet two and a half hour movie. David Both performances were strangely with an old foe where he can return sporadically comedic. Maybe it is Fincher, famous for his brutal love believable. Alan Arkin was also a to the one place where he is a hero: better described as an existentialist- ‘em or hate ‘em flicks like Fight treat as Wilson’s newspaper boss. inside the ring. Rocky – a picture about self-merit Club, tones down his usual violence Without giving too much away, both The plot is simple and sounds and the power of a roaring audience. into a beautiful masterpiece that has films clearly examine death and loss incredibly hokey and clichéd, but Throw in a new Springsteen song Academy Award written all over in a family. Both films ultimately the story is told with the utmost and the best performance of 2008 in it. The mere production value, the warm one’s holiday spirits. naturalism. Rourke’s character is Mickey Rourke, and the result is a costumes, the cinematography, the never given easy answers and a deeply moving, well-made film. heartfelt epiphany for him is never Casualties of the Recession: Over 18 Shows Closed Melissa Wong ‘09 Arts Editor From changes in federal such as Dividing the Estate, White starring the immortal Patti Lupone. thirteen Tonys it was nominated policies to the Survival Shop price Christmas, Liza’s at the Palace, Perhaps one of the most for. Spamalot, based on the movie hike, everywhere we look we see the and Slava’s Snowstorm ended their disheartening aspects of these clos- Monty Python and the Holy Grail, effects of the economic recession. respective runs along with crowd ings is that several of the shows that earned three Tonys out of its four- Broadway is no exception. Theater- favorites Boeing-Boeing, Grease, closed this month were not only teen nominations. Finally, Gypsy goers can see a record number of and the long-running Hairspray. On acclaimed by audiences and critics was acclaimed for its three leads, shows close in a given month and January 11th, the number of shows alike but were also big Tony Award Laura Benanti, Boyd Gaines, and even a given day. In January 2007, to close was less severe but the in- nominees and winners (for those Patti Lupone, who swept the Tony three shows closed on Broadway. jury to the theater community was who don’t know, the Tony Awards Awards for Best Featured Actress, In January 2008, five shows closed. just as profound because the shows are like the Oscars of Broadway). Best Featured Actor, and Best Ac- This January, thirteen shows closed. to close on this date were definitive Boeing-Boeing won six out of the tress in a musical. The troubling thing is that many of productions that opened new doors six Tonys it was nominated for, in- As sad as it is to watch the them closed on the same night. New on Broadway. These casualties in- cluding Best Direction, Best Actor, spotlights fade on these beloved Yorkers can wake up one morning cluded Arthur Miller’s limited run and Best Revival of a Play. Hair- shows, we can only hope that the to find that the marquee in Times of All My Sons (yes, the production spray, which was based on the John newly vacated theaters on Broadway Square shining a little less brightly. starring Katie Holmes), the Monty Waters film and later made into an- will yield more successful produc- On January 4th, the sea- Python-inspired Spamalot, and the other movie starring Nikki Blonsky tions that will follow the esteemed sonal/limited engagement shows illustrious production of Gypsy, and Zac Efron, won eight out of the legacies of their predecessors. Sports, Page 8 The Academy News January 2009 MKA SPORTS

Nothing But Hard Work: Swimming Sets Goals High Isabel Glusman ‘11 Issue Contributor Did you know that during 14 members in 2004 to nearly 40 and crushed Newark Academy by So what are they practic- an average practice the swim team swimmers. Practices now involve 56 points, taking first in all but one ing for? To race the length of that swims the length of the football more sprinting compared to last event. Unfortunately, both the boys football field in just over a minute field more than 23 times? That’s a year’s emphasis on long distance and girls teams suffered losses to with less than a breath per yard line. mile and a half, underwater, in 90 with Coach Flocco. Senior captains powerhouse Mountain Lakes , but, Next time your friends leave for a minutes. But what are they practic- Jeff Zak, Colin Humphreys, Jenny none the less, all swimmers are set- swim meet, think twice about what ing for anyway? Glusman, Laura Dudek, and two- ting new individual records. Re- they’re really doing, and remember New head coach, Pat Col- time captain, Katherine Phillips, are cently the team missed school for to support them at their next meet. lins, formerly assistant coach of among the fastest in their events as the Essex County Championships, the elite swim club, Cougar Aquat- well as the oldest team members. and looks forward to the Colonial ics, has set new standards for the So far the changes look pos- Hills Conference, Prep champion- For the Record constantly improving team. The itive. Girls defeated Oak Knoll at an ships, and Easterns competition. Final Scores 2008-2009 team has grown from all-girls meet by a sheer 2 points,

Fencers Battle at Santelli Ice Hockey 5-10 Jake Victor Perl ‘10 Staff Writer Once upon a time there was health. In the first pool, teams from degree of triumph in the first pool. a crazy spectacle of a sport called kingdoms of varying reputations In the majestic pool of first through Swimming (Boys) 2-2 fencing. There were weapons, tears, compete to be placed in the better eighth, braved by noble warriors blood, and anguished groans. But re- second pool. Those worthy of en- Lily “Mad Dog” Shepard, Chrissy ally, there were only weapons (and tering the better second pool must “Foiler” McIntosh, and Katie “Dan- some anguish). In one famous se- ger” Davis, MKA conquered four Swimming (Girls) 3-2 ries of MKA battles, often referred “The noble squad but fell to three comendable teams to as the Santelli Tournament, each in three well-fought battles. Alas! squad of warriors fenced tag team placed third in The ferocious cougar-knights of against other tribes such as Newark the Montclair Kimberley Academy Fencing (Boys) 1-3 Academy and Millburn. Each squad the fencing war earned an honorable third posi- was composed of warriors armed tion in the great fencing war with with the same weapons, though of more than equally honorable representatives three such fencers may compete in from more than forty assorted king- Fencing (Girls) 3-2 a match, left to their own demise or forty assorted doms. This is an honor not easily victory. ahcieved, nor easily borne. Without In the four-membered foil kingdoms.” a doubt, this band of fencing war- squad, from which three brave souls place in the top eight warriors in riors is among the finest group of Basketball (Boys) 2-9 with the fierocity and intensity of the aformentioned battles. Anything competitors in the entire Montclair blue and green Cougars engaged short of eight and there is a chance Kimberley Academy. If these fero- in battle, two great matches were for neither victory nor glory. The cious fighters of fierce ferocity from fought. These battles of epic propor- MKA foil warriors triumphed in our own alma-mater continue on Basketball (Girls) 5-6 tions are known in the dog-eat-dog their personal pool with a first place their conquest of the imposing Co- world of fencing as “pools.” Pools ranking, but were seeded second in lonial Hills in this fashion, glory in are elaborate tournaments in which the overall pool due to Millburn’s the entire statehood is undoubtedly fighters boldly risk their dignity and high indicator, which expresses the the next honor to gain.