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ESPERANTO VERSION 1.0 - 04-FEB-2019 Translator's note: - The given names were chosen to be translated, so they give an Esperanto colour to the story, they sound more familiar to the Esperanto readers (from different language backgrounds) and they could fit better to the grammar. The same is traditionally used for classical names, always represented in their Esperanto forms (e.g. Lukrecio, Demosteno). The family names were kept as in the original. "Bait" by Iago Faustus, Ph.D. part of the series Fabulae Atroces Fausti [email protected] [email protected] +1-718-440-1873 1 Special translator©s edition of the script. 2 Overall production note: This script represents a comic-book representation of a sort of obscene nature documentary, and so a number of elements will appear as panels representing camera shots in that documentary. The documentary has a "narrator" who will appear from time-to-time in a CAPTION element (CAPTION – PSEUDO-NARRATION). At other times there will be "interviews" with people knowledgeable about the events this "documentary" is about. In the course of these interviews, an unseen interviewer will occasionally interpose questions of the interview subjects. These will be handled through speech balloons attributed to an "Unseen interviewer." When the interviewees speak a foreign language, that language will appear in their speech balloons and "subtitles" will appear below to "translate" what they are saying. Also, "Subtitles" will also appear from time to time to indicate the "source" of various "footage" that the documentary makers made us of in putting the documentary together. Notes for the translator: Much of the material in the comic that follows consists of instructions to the artist who illustrated it. The artist is a native speaker of English and, in any event, the comic has already been drawn, so there is no need to translate that material. What does need to be translated are the lines of dialog – either appearing in balloons or in caption boxes – and other verbal elements of the comic, such as "sound effects" (designated as SFX in the script) or occasional "action words" that substitute for motion in a static medium. In hopes of minimizing confusion, I have put different kinds of text into different colors. Words in black text are part of the descriptive material of the comic. You are welcome, indeed encouraged, to read them, as they along with the copy of the comic you have been provided, will provide you with valuable context as you work on your translations. They do not themselves have to be translated, however. Words in blue text are elements that actually need to be translated. Usually you will find a blank in red text below the blue text where your translation should go. There will usually be a guide number with every request for translation to show you what you should be translating. I think it should become clear what I'm looking for as you go through the script. Finally, words in turquoise text are comments designed for guidance with English phrases that might be unusual, colloquial, or ambiguous. I am providing these to try to make sure that your translated text corresponds well to the original English meaning. I am happy to discuss any questions you may have about this translation. You may relay them through the translation service for which you are working or, if that service permits you to do so, you 3 should feel free to contact me directly via the contact information listed on the cover page to this script. 4 COVER: Same Fabulae Atroces Fausti logo as appeared on "She's the Ransom," over another bit of neo-pulp, in this case a young woman swimmer in a 1940s-style swimsuit and hairstyle being menaced underwater by tentacles coming up from the deep. There some be if feasible some bubbles to emphasize the underwater. CAPTION (title) (1): "Bait" Translation (1): "Logaĵo" CAPTION (author) (2): Written and produced by Iago Faustus Comment (2): "Produced" in this context means that Faustus paid an artist's commission to Erosarts for his services in doing the illustration and also arranged for the publication of the webcomic. Translation (2): Verkita kaj produktita de Iago Faustus CAPTION (artist) (3): Illustrated by Erosarts Translation (3): Ilustrita de Erosarts 5 PAGE 1 (Four panels) Panel 1: CAPTAIN IVAN DRUMMINGDALE ("Drummingdale') stands at the bow of his ship, the RV SEAGOON. Drummingdale is a gaunt, tall, naval-looking man. He wears a short-sleeved white shirt with captain's epaulets and a seaman's cap. It is dawn in the tropics. Drummingdale is staring out to sea and speaks without turning aroud. Drummingdale (1): You're up early today, Professor Turpentine. Translation (1): Hodiaŭ vi frue ellitiĝis, Profesoro Turpentine. Panel 2: Drummingdale stands on the rail next to PROFESSOR EUSTACE TURPENTINE ("Turpentine"). Turpentine is a short, fat man with a white mustache and a white fringe of hair around a head which would otherwise be bald. However in this panel he is wearing a pith helmet and a twin-pocketed shirt. He looks relaxed. Drummingdale, still staring over the rail out to sea, looks anything but. Turpentine (2): It's a big day for us, Captain Drummingdale. Our first attempt. Translation (2): Ni havos grandiozan tagon, Kapitano Drummingdale. Nia unua provo. Drummingdale (3): Oh, aye. Comment (3): "Aye" is "yes" with an archaic or maritime flavor. To to the extent possible, the translation should reflect this. Translation (3): Ho ja. Panel 3: Close-up on Drummingdale's face. His jaw is clenched. Drummingdale (4): Can't say I approve of what you're going to put those girls through. Comment (4): "Can't say" here means "I can't say." Translation (4): Mi ne povas diri, ke mi konsentas kun tio, al kio vi submetos la knabinojn. Panel 4: Close-up on Turpentine, though not quite as close up as on Drummingdale in the previous panel. Turpentine's expression is one of jolly unconcern. 6 Turpentine (5): They both signed the release, Captain. Turpentine (5): A "release" in this context is a legal document in which one person agrees not to sue another person for certain damages that might be incurred in an activity both are involved in. Translation (5): Ambaŭ subskribis la dokumenton, Kapitano. Turpentine (6): They understand what they're doing. Translation (6): Ili komprenas tion, kion ili faros. 7 PAGE 2 (Splash page) Sngple panel: Helicopter view of the RV Seagoon, plowing through turquoise sea against the backdrop of a brilliant tropical sunrise. The RV Seagoon is a good-sized vessel, with an extended midsection that appears to contain some sort of giant tank. There is also a crane of sorts on deck. CAPTION – PSEUDO-NARRATION (1): What is it that Professor Eustace Turpentine is proposing that so disturbs Captain Drummingdale? Translation (1): Kion Profesoro Eŭstaco Turpentine proponas kaj kio tiel perturbas Kapitanon Drummingdale? CAPTION – PSEUDO-NARRATION (2): Only one of the strangest and most significant scientific adventures yet recorded. Translation (2): Nur unu el la plej strangaj kaj signifoplenaj sciencaj aventuroj iam okazintaj. CAPTION – PSEUDO-NARRATION (3): And we document it here for you for the first time! Translation (3): Kaj ni dokumentas ĝin por vi tie ĉi la unuan fojon! 8 PAGE 3 (Four panels) Panel 1: ELIZA FANSHAW ("Eliza") sits in a big wicker chair in a kind of hippie-ish apartment. She's a bubbly-sexy blond girl. She wears thin cotton tie-dyed shirt that stretches a bit over her breasts (she's obviously braless) and a floral skirt and sandals. Her posture indicates she's being interviewed. Eliza (1): People ask me, "What on earth do you think you're doing, Eliza?" and "Don't you know you have your whole life ahead of you?" Comment (1): The material in quotation marks are things that Eliza has been hearing about her plans and which she is quoting back to the interviewer. The expression "what on earth" is a figurative expression meant to express incredulity or surprise. It shouldn't be translated literally – substitute an equivalent expression if one exists in the target language. Translation (1): Oni demandas al mi "Kion damne vi kredas fari, Eliza?" kaj "Ĉu vi konscias, ke vi havas vian tutan vivon antaŭ vi?" Eliza (2): And I see their point but, the thing is, about me... Translation (2): Kaj mi komprenas ilian vidpunkton, sed temas pri mi... SUBTITLE (3): Eliza Fanshaw, prospective subject. Translation (3): Eliza Fanshaw, kandidatino. Panel 2: Close-up on Eliza's smiling face, which should emphasize that she has a cute little snub nose. Eliza (4): ...is that I think that the most amazing thing about being alive... Translation (4): ...nu mi kredas, ke la plej mirinda afero en la vivo... Elize (5): … is sex! Translation (5): ...estas seksumado! Panel 3: View of Eliza (in very soft focus, to the point that we can scarcely identify her as Eliza) naked, seen from behind on top of a guy). 9 CAPTION – ELIZA NARRATING (6): I'm not supposed to say things like this, but ever since I was fifteen, I have been seeking out sexual adventure. Comment (6): "Ever since I was fifteen" is short for "ever since I was fifteen years old." Translation (6): Mi ne devus diri ion tian, sed depost mia 15-jaraĝo mi daŭre serĉas seksaventurojn. CAPTION – ELIZA NARRATING (7): I've even acted in some experimental adult films, just to see what it would be like. Comment (7): "Adult films" here is a semi-euphemism for pornographic films, or at least films with explicit sexual content. Translation (7): Mi eĉ rolis en kelkaj eksperimentaj pornaj filmoj, nur por kontroli la sperton.
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