Volume 46 March 26, Issue 10 2007 small ALK The Student Voice of Methodist university www.smalltalkmc.comT ‘SHE WILL BE SORELY MISSED’

“Christ shall come with shout of acclamation and take me home, what joy shall fill my heart.” From her favorite hymn, “How Great Thou Art”

Ashley Genova News Editor On Mon, March 19 Dr. Wenda Johnson, the Interim Vice President for Academic Affairs, was found dead in her home. Johnson was 58. The cause of her death is not yet known. Johnson was born on Oct. 20, 1948, in Minneapolis Minnesota. Johnson came to Methodist on Aug. 14 of 1991 and served as the chair of the Physical Education Department. She was the first person at Methodist with a doctorate in Physical Education. Continued on page 2 Above photo courtesy of Melissa Jameson. Other photos by Ashley Genova. 2 smallTALK March 26, 2007 Volume 46, Issue 10

Reverend Dr. Michael Safley speaks to audience while other speakers One Spirit sings “Thy Will Be Done” sit in the background. All photos by Ashley Genova

Continued from page 1 one to be grateful for Johnson’s dent Development and Services a wonderful woman, life on Earth he said several and Dean of Students. “She was bright, smart and fun- Johnson also played an impor- prayers thanking God for her. a strong advocate for the highest ny. We’ll have a hard tant part as dean of the School Following, members of the con- standards of academic achieve- time replacing her-no of Science and Human Devel- gregation shared memories that ment by all concerned with the doubt,” said Kevin opment by advising to the vice they had of Johnson throughout educational process, but she was Page, Student Gov- president of Academic Affairs. her time at Methodist. an even stronger advocate for ernment Association She also served as the head of “The community will the students that she served.” President. the Interdisciplinary Studies certainly be at a loss,” Safley. Thurs, Mar 22 “A Cel- “In the fami- (IDS) program. “It’s going to be hard to ebration of Life for Dr. Wenda ly, she was the one that Reverend Dr. Mi- walk by her office and not see D. Johnson” was held in order always played with chael Safley, Vice President for her,” said Lois De Vico, office to honor Johnson. The program the kids,” said Miriam Church and Community Rela- manager. “Dr. J. was a great role began with a prelude played Johnson, her brother’s tions, held the worship service model for me, I loved her bright, on the piano by Jane Gardiner wife. in Hensdale Chapel on Wed in bubbly, unique personality and I and concluded with a Hymn of “She was honor of Johnson. He began the hope that I can show that same Grace, “Precious Lord Take My a big kid,” Francis service by reading from Ecclesi- personality.” Hand.” “Scorchy” Johnson, astes 3:1-12, and then the mem- “Dr. Johnson was a “With my education Johnson’s brother. bers of the congregation sang loyal friend and I will miss her work at Methodist University she Johnson will hymns that were Johnson’s fa- friendship greatly,” said George helped prepare me for the differ- live on through her vorites. Safley reminded every- Blanc, the Vice President for Stu- ent aspects of student teaching. mother, Mrs. Arvis She was a dedicated professor Johnson of Haines City, and enjoyed working with Fla. and her brother of Audience sings one of Johnson’s favorite hymns. her students,” said Abby Auburndale, Fla. Boone, a Senior majoring in Elementary Education. “As professionals we felt that she helped prepare us for our future endeav- ors as educators,” said the Student Teachers of 2007. “Tragic loss for com- munity. Dr. Johnson was Rev. Safley lights candles before the service.

smallTALK is the student-run smallTALK staff newspaper of Methodist College. It is Advertising Manager published every other week throughout Editor-in-Chief Ferron Grant Ashley Genova the school year. The newspaper is editorially independent of Methodist Web Editor College, and any ideas and opinions Do You Have a News Cassandra Wells Layout/ Copy Editor expressed herein do not necessarily reflect Ashley Young the views and opinions of the faculty, staff Staff Writers and administration of Methodist College. Passion for Justin Morehead Opinions smallTALK welcomes Letters to Zach Yonk the Editor. All letters should be delivered Layout Editor/Copy Editor Byron Lowe David Santiago to the Student Media office on the first Jameson Jones floor of Bern’s Student Center or sent via Fashion? Dionne Drakes e-mail to [email protected]. Story Cara Hale Entertainment suggestions should be sent to the same Byron Lowe be dancing, singing, and other address. Staff Writer breathtaking entertainment. Ex- Layout Editor/Copy Editor Photographers Marianne Mosch Students are free to join perience something new and ex- Margina Cocozza Bendana smallTALK at any point in the school America’s Next Top Mod- citing here at Methodist, tickets Cavis Rodney year. Meetings are every Tuesday at 4 el? How about Methodist’s Next will be as low as $2 for 16 and Sports p.m. in the Heritage Dining Room. Top Model? Come out Tuesday, under, $4 for adults, and FREE Layout/ Copy Editor April 10, 7 p.m. at the Reeves for anyone with a Methodist Remille Shipman Auditorium to experience the I.D. fashion flavor of Methodist Uni- Tickets can be purchased versity. at the door or purchased in ad- Our very own MU Inter- vance at room 12 in the Berns national Club will be hosting a Student Center, phone 910 – 630 fashion show featuring Method- 7225. All are welcome, so bring ist students in various styles of your family and friends to view unique fashion wear. In addition your fellow peers in our First to the fashion show, there will Annual Fashion show. Volume 46, Issue 10 Monday, March 26, 2007  smallTALK 3 ‘Throw Out Your Rules—These are ROAD RULES!’

Alicia Bates challenges and tele- Contributing Writer “If Barbie were an ac- also suggested paying attention vision to develop a tual woman, she would be six to the more positive ads in the personal life, unlike feet tall, 101 lbs, have a dress others who just get On March 14, Rachel media, such as the Dove cam- size of four and a 39” bust; so paign for real beauty. so caught up in it. Robinson of Road Rules came basically she’d topple over,” When asked to Methodist University to ad- At the end of her lec- Robinson said. ture, Robinson told the audience around campus if dress issues on Body Awareness. Robinson talked about more speakers should In her lecture, Robinson talked her opinions of the show. When different types of eating disor- talking about her overall experi- be brought to cam- about the criticism that a lot of ders, from anorexia to chewing pus, 90% of students the female competitors on Real ence on the show, Robinson said and spitting. Statistics show that that it was “incredible because said they would like World and Road Rules receive 43% of young adult between the to have more speak- from fans, especially women. she went to so many places that ages of 16-20 have eating dis- she wouldn’t otherwise be able ers come to Meth- In other countries, orders, and 10% of those cases odist. Students said women are celebrated for their to go.” involve men. In order to over- Robinson then went they would like to curvy figures and their beauty. come media stereotypes, Rob- hear topics including In America, women are com- on to say how the show has inson suggested talking back to changed and has become one sex, sports, religion, pared to unrealistic measure- you television when it shows politics, and drugs. ments of Barbie. big frat party. Along with her something that offends you. She season of Road Rules Campus Crawl, Robinson has done five Real World/Road Rules. She said she is happy that she has What’s QEP? been able to step away from the

Spencer Davis idea in as many different aspects CONTACT RACHEL! Contributing Writer of students’ lives as possible. www.collegedropout.com. 3) The Teaching and Learning Have you heard about the www.myspace.com/collegedropouttv Quality Enhancement Plan Center at Methodist Univer- Rachel Robinson with a student. Photo (QEP)? The QEP is a project that sity – The center will present courtesy of Doris Jackson. Methodist University is required workshops and seminars on us- to do for accreditation. Method- ing contemporary and innova- ist University will be choosing tive approaches in teaching and one aspect of student learning learning. As well, the center and applying it campus-wide. will serve as a vehicle to help The QEP committee now improve student learning skills. Donate plasma brings forward to students, staff, Emphasis will be placed on en- faculty, and alumni the “Big hancing such skills as critical Five.” These are the five pro- thinking, reading comprehen- posals for the QEP theme. Take sion, and writing. a look at the “Big Five” and Your fill up could help choose your favorite.Once you 4) Enriching the International have chosen, let your favorite Experience at Methodist Uni- professor(s) know. Professors versity - A major component of will be voting in April on the this project will be to encourage someone have a “Big Five.” Methodist University students to take part in exchange pro- 1) The Internship Project - grams. Along with travel, there Methodist University will de- are many activities we can do regular life. velop campus-wide internship on campus that can enhance the opportunities. All day students international experience. We would be encouraged (required) can, for example, bring in inter- to participate, as well as those national speakers and conduct GET A $ BONUSBONUS night students who have the op- seminars and conferences. We can assist professors in develop- 0010 portunity to engage in intern- ships. Internships with govern- ing curriculum that focuses on the international experience. First Time Donors ment agencies and nonprofits Present this coupon on your first visit. could especially focus on com- munity involvement and civic 5) The Research Project at learning. Methodist University – Meth- Donate plasma. odist University will develop a ReceiveReceive up up to to $00.00 $200 It’s easy & simple. 2) The Big Idea Project – This program that will focus on im- program would involve adopt- proving and enriching the re- a month and give life ing a “big idea” at periodic in- search skills of students, faculty, tervals (every year, every other staff, and alumni. Every student to patients in need. year etc.) and address the idea will learn research skills and will from as many different angles be required to complete a senior as possible. The idea in question thesis within their field of con- might be phrased as a subject centration. Faculty and staff will also engage in research and will 910-764-9300000-0000 AvailableAvailable toto firstfirst timetime donorsdonors only.only. - love, war, freedom etc - or it Expires 00/00/00.Expires 07-30-06. DIS Paycode: Paycode: 00000 40022 T-code: NPADFNC UWOSHKOSH might be phrased as a question. be given opportunities to share Address4441 Bragg Line Blvd. 1 their work with colleagues. This proposal would have the Fayetteville,Adress Line NC 2 28303 campus community choose the Alumni will be invited back to Call for an appointment today. “big idea” and then address this campus to share their latest re- search projects. www.biolifeplasma.com 4 smallTALK March 26, 2007 Volume 46, Issue 10 Opinions

America the Bootyful!!! Remille’s Rhetoric David Santiago Opinions Editor As I look at myself And how about those And ladies, for the love in the mirror every morning I starving children in China and of all that is sacred, don’t go Remille Shipman say to myself “Who is that Africa? They are the reason we around with your cute little “life Sports Editor fat pig in the mirror?” and all got this way in the first place. is sweeter with chocolate, choc- my reflection says back to Remember when you were a kid olate is a woman’s best friend” me “Just your average Amer- and actually were smart enough attitude and then ask us if you ican buddy!!!” to eat half your food and say look fat in the pants that were What is it about us “I’m done.” Our parents, and Americans that makes us so two sizes to small for you when more so our grandparents, would you were 12! The answer is obsessed with eating every- say “Finish your plate, there are It is common knowl- sponsible for their mishap. Stu- thing in sight? It’s gotten so starving kids in China.” I fail to YES, you ate the entire box of Valentines Day chocolates in an edge to many upperclassmen dents still have to maintain the bad that spreading democra- see how my eating myself into at Methodist that graduating in checklist that their advisor gives cy in the world has become a childhood obesity benefited hour, you are going to look fat. Hey, you don’t see four years is a difficult task. The them own their own, because code for estab- late Interim Dean of Academic advisors, like all human be- lishing grease us guys crying over Affairs Dr. Wenda Johnson-God it, were just as fat ings, are imperfect. Plus, these ball burger rest her soul-stated in a meeting professors who advise us have joints in Bagh- as you, so for our with the entire freshman class a million other things to do be- dad. You think next date, let’s take that it takes an average of 15 sides advise us. the war is just that walk on the hours per semester for one to I feel we need a system about oil? It beach you said you graduate in four years. that allows students to be as- is, cooking liked in your match. I believe that it is also sisted in their class advisement oil. Petroleum com ad. common knowledge among more closely. When I attended is fraction of A n d Methodist upperclassmen that Fayetteville State, I had a sepa- how much of course then we not a lot of people manage to rate academic advisor that saw money were get all these diets graduate within the stereotypi- that I was on the right track aca- going to cheat that tell you what cal four-year requirement. From demically. Now Methodist isn’t out of Iraq low fat stuff you what I have witnessed in my 6,000 students strong like FSU, when we set can eat endlessly. three-year Methodist tenure, but couldn’t we at least look at up McDon- I haven’t seen a lot of people moving away from professors alds over Hey, how about eating what you graduate in four years without a advising us and replacing them there. bit of worry. And I’ve also wit- with personnel whose main fo- A n d want, just not in bulk. You don’t nessed a lot (by my count) of cus would be to bend over back- of course it’s four-year seniors having to wait wards to see that we get out of not our fault, need a bucket of another semester to walk that French Fries and here in four years? I believe it’s because stage. Maybe we need bigger- that’s the solution to our long- there is an ten patties of beef name speakers for our December term problem. “obesity epi- on your burger, commences, because I’ve come This advisement situa- demic” going how about just across a lot of past, present and tion is a problem here at Meth- around. Great, learning to eat future nine-semester students. odist. Why do I even write about let’s take a ONE HAMBURG- Why are all these fifth- this, you ask? I’m a victim of collective lack ER, with maybe a year seniors continue to lurk on what I just wrote about. But I’ll of self-control and turn it them. If there starving, send the real vegetable (fries don’t count) our campus? I don’t believe that also add that it is your respon- into the flu. I suppose my food I don’t want to them. They like some carrots in dip, and it’s because Methodist is full of sibility to follow your calendar. grandchildren will be sitting need it more than me, and then then instead of sitting on the unintelligent individuals. I think And I screwed up on that one on my knees asking me about we can be one happy world of bean bag all day playing your that every student that has failed myself. this horrific event. “Oh it people at exactly our ideal football and basketball X-Box to graduate is only halfway re- was horrible kids; there were weights. ribs and cheesecakes and games, GO OUTSIDE AND That’s how we do it PLAY REAL BASKETBALL quarter pound cheese burg- here. We eat 20-ounce steaks, ers and donuts everywhere. I grease-ball burgers from Mc- AND FOOTBALL! don’t know how I survived.” Donalds and Burger King, and Naturally, I am spoof- That’s the irony of then get dessert. While on a re- ing myself here in a way since it all, in some countries they cent trip to New York I was in as I indicated before; I ain’t no die from involuntary starva- the food court of the airport and bean pole myself. But personal- tion and we have gotten so saw a sign for a Burger King ly, I’ve determined to take re- fat we actually have a dis- credit card. A BURGER KING sponsibility for my own weight, ease like anorexia where CREDIT CARD!!!! Terrific! not hide behind some supposed people starve on purpose Now I can have Burger King for fat disease and accept being the when they have three course breakfast, Burger King for lunch fat American who ate what could meals in front of them. That’s and be dead by dinner and total- have kept some kid in Africa pathetic! ly dodge paying for it. alive one day longer. Volume 46, Issue 10 Monday, March 26, 2007  smallTALK 5 to have the reign, because hope- Corner Worker A Voice fully, they will be governed by God and submit to Him.” Than From The when called out on it he com- pletely denied what he was Jameson Jones Wilderness clearly on record saying: “I nev- Staff Writer David Santiago er said that in my life ... I never said only Christians and Jews. I never said that.” And of course It seems like only yes- programs in which many of he has repeatedly stated that the terday as I was going through my friends are a part of. separation of church and state is similar emotions of mourning It will be hard to re- not in the constitution. Pretty the death of someone special in place Dr. Johnson due to the clever trick there, building on the North Carolina region back numerous contributions she Now it appears I rubber padded room! in December 2005. made not only from being have only three articles John Hagee. I can’t be the fact that no, that exact phras- Now as I think about the left to rant on in this col- nice about this, his ideas of mak- ing of the concept does not exist sad news of Dr. Wenda John- the Interim VP for Academic umn before I enter the real ing homosexual acts punishable in the constitution, but there is a son’s passing, am seeply sad- Affairs and a tenured faculty world and start a new by imprisonment makes him the little thing he might want to do. dened. member in the Wellness and chapter in life. One of Hitler of the right wing. He ac- It’s called comprehending what Even though I did not Exercise Science program, these will be a farewell so tually thinks homosexuals make you read, if he had any concept know her personally, I found but her contributions to life. I only have two articles to a choice to be that way, even of this, I can only imagine what out how great of a person he re- To the family of Dr. really stir things up and other Christians who are against he might discover about the very ally was and when I saw the Johnson, I mourn your loss create some controversy, homosexuality admit that it is news release on the website, I and ask that the Giver of Life so with no further de- something physiologically in- First Amendment in the Consti- felt that someone had kicked bring you peace during this lay… grained, but not to John, he pret- tution. me in my stomach. sad time. I am so sick of ty much thinks people purposely Again I wish there was After reading on what To the entire Method- the simple minded con decide to be ostracized by there a way I could be nice about this, she had done for the Methodist artist I see on TV every- families and most of society. ist University community, but it’s impossible, these guys University community, it has we must be inspired by Dr. day called “televangelist.” And even as the “Hitler” of the have nothing to do with the made me realize that without How do these people still right wing, John Hagee ironi- her ideas for what are now MU Johnson’s contributions to make money? Hasn’t any- cally loves the Jews. So much kingdom of God, there just a at Night and MU Online, this this community so that we one gotten the hint that so that he basically would com- bunch of money hungry wind- university would be not in the can move forward in making these are just a bunch of mit genocide on the Palestinians bags who’s political ideals boil position that it is today. this a great and outstanding sleazy business types like in Israel. And hey, I am not go- down to crying like a bunch of With the dedication that university that serves all who the guy who sold you that ing to deny the historical fact five-year-olds because the world she had for not only those pro- desire academic success. really crudy car for three that the Jewish people came out doesn’t work the way they want grams but for the other pro- Until next my friends, times it’s value? They tell of Israel long ago an understand it to. grams that she was involved in, I will see you at the races. you everything will be all the want to returns and have including the teacher education happy and sunshine with there own state, but you can’t no sickness if you believe just show up an tell the people in Jesus (under their own who were there for last 2000 given conditions). Natu- years at least to leave. John Ha- rally this always involves gee ought to be watched by the giving them money which FBI, he is literally one of the finances THEIR extrava- most dangerous leaders on the gant lifestyle. Naturally planet. there are a few I must People remember this isn’t point out. some atheist talking here, this is First let’s talk one of your own (Christians) about our good friend Jer- speaking. ry Falwell, good ole Jerry. Now for a close look at From his right wing fas- good Pat Robertson. From run- cist agenda to homoerotic ning for president to calling for puppets, Jerry gets an A in world leaders assassinations, Pat making a first class jac- is the crown jewel of insane tel- ka** out of himself. First evangelist. He mystically cures his politics are garbage. I diseases of people he never has am admittedly a liberal met over the airwaves, interprets non-affiliated democrat the news so we know what the with some heavily social- latest to be announced date of Merle Norman Salon ist sympathies true, but I the rapture is, and now he gives can be respectful of my health advice. Yes, he is a health more conservative peers guru now. Because when I think when it is within reason. about getting in shape, I think But Jerry basically has about how great it would be to succeeded into tricking look like a hunch backed wrin- most evangelicals into kly bobble head doll. Seriously, thinking that God is a his head is more agile than Sha- modern day Republican, kira’s hips, and unlike Shakira’s that Teletubbies like to get immaculate hips, Pat does lie. it on back stage with pup- While running for president Pat pets of the same gender, was quoted of saying about who and somehow making the should be in the government: 9/11 attacks out as God’s “Individual Christians are the punishments for giving only ones really -- and Jewish women equal rights in the people, those who trust God of work place. Falwell be- Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob -- are longs in a strait jacket in a the only ones that are qualified 6 smallTALK March 26, 2007 Volume 46, Issue 10

‘300’ a Historical,Entertainment Inspiring Bloodbath Movie

Aaron Sagers Miller graphic novel about the about the fa- Merge of The Morning Call titular number of Spartans bat- mous battle at (Allentown, Pa.) tling a massive Persian army _ Thermopylae. (MCT) slaughtered its box office com- But it does say History buffs take note: petition on opening weekend. a little bit This may be the first and only Taking in around $70 about human time the word “Thermopylae” million, and setting the bar for a nature. will be making headlines. potentially successful upcoming The blood-soaked epic summer movie season, the mov- When the final “300” _ adapted from a Frank ie doesn’t actually teach much heads had

A wounded Leonidas, played by Gerard Butler roars his defiance at the Persian invaders in Warner Bros. Pictures’ action drama, “300”. (Handout/MCT)

people into (a hopeless) battle that 300 Spartans gave their rolled and the last against a tyrant is inspiring. Sure, last breath to defend it.” soldier felled, the movies and history tell us those (“300”) Rorschach-like heroes always die _ and sometimes “I wonder if the blood splattered they die while painted blue and get- carbs in that Olive Garden credits flashed ting disemboweled _ but they die breadstick are really worth and the audience with honor and glory. it.” (Your ) rose from their Who doesn’t want that? Not exactly an in- seats, filled with Those heroes fought for spiring message to the troops, a lust for battle something, and if the notion of that right? Nope, but I’m not and glory. Grown doesn’t grab on tight and squeeze ashamed to be soft. men filed out of the cockles of your heart, I doubt That’s why I go to the theater sound- you bleed warm red liquid. the picture shows _ to vicari- ing war cries Maybe I’m an optimist ously experience love, ad- while flinging but I think a movie like “300” is venture and glory, then go nacho speartips. popular because it is at our core to home to a cushy bed. want to be the hero; to right wrongs It’s one thing to like You’ve heard of and leave a mark on the world. And the idea of a life of purpose, beer muscles? if someone erects a statue in our and quite another to pursue it. This was a case honor, well, that would be cool, Plus, saving your fellow man of movie mus- too. is time-consuming and cles. But honestly, most of our tough. I am life’s battles consist more of com- Besides, true glory not immune to it, peting with a fellow driver for the is hard to come by and some either. same prime parking spot or scoring of us are just better at being A f- the empty checkout line in the gro- sheep than shepherds. ter seeing “The cery store. After all, some are Matrix,” I spent a Although there are those born great, some achieve week trying to who fight poverty, corruption, dis- greatness, some have great- run up walls. And ease or actual wars with guns (like ness thrust upon them _ and if not for a pa- the current one in the area once some are just great at flinging tient girlfriend known as Persia), overall, we are nachos in the theater. adept at literally pretty soft. ___ talking me off a To wit: Aaron Sagers writes ledge, I’d still be “What we do in life echoes for Merge, an edition of The trying out a in eternity.” (“Gladiator”) (Allentown, Pa.) Morning homemade grap- “Every man dies, not ev- Call. Reach him at Aaron. pling hook ala ery man really lives.” (“Brave- [email protected]. Batman. heart”) Find Merge online at: www. B u t “All men lose when they mergedigital.com epic movies like die and all men die. But a slave and “300” affect us a free man lose different things.” the most. Tales of (“Spartacus”) a warrior with a “A new age has come, an sword leading his age of freedom. And all will know Volume 46, Issue 10 Monday, March 26, 2007  smallTALK 7

‘The Last ‘300’ a Historical, Inspiring Bloodbath Movie Mimzy’ A Familiar Story

Coutesy of yahoo movies.

Roger Moore about innocent children receiv- The ing a message from the future, (MCT) across the eons of time, has be- Something in the theater come a “Little Buddha” for the made my hand work across the new millennium, with pushy Ti- page. There it is, scribbled in the betan-loving teachers and seem- notebook, barely legible. ingly “chosen” children. “Why is `The Last Mimzy’ Plus a doll, a stuffed rab- so much like `Ghost’ ... so Ti- bit named Mimzy. betan?” It’s been 25 years since COLLEGE SPECIALS A slow movie will do that “E.T.,” so we’re long overdue to you when you take notes in for an emotional sci-fi movie the dark. that kids will connect with. ADD-ON SPECIALS And then, there’s my an- “Mimzy,” directed by the fellow DINO’S PIZZA swer, in the credits. Bruce Joel who runs the New Line movie $1.49 - 2 liter of Coke Rubin, who introduced “The Ti- studio, Bob Shaye, benefits from ANDREWS AT betan Book of the Dead” to a tear-jerking turn by little Miss movie audiences with “Ghost” Wryn and some very familiar $1.99 - 16 Breadstix and “Jacob’s Ladder” in 1990, is story beats. RAMSEY ST one of several credited writers But it’s awkwardly con- $2.49 - 10 Cinnamon Stix on this odder-than-odd chil- structed, with a lame teacher- dren’s film. tells-a-story-in-the-future frame- 488-6100 $2.99 - 16 Cheezystix A famous sci-fi short story work that gets the film off on the (“Mimzy Were Borogoves”) is wrong foot. It takes a good, long the framework for this movie, while to get going, and the ac- $4.99 - 10 Wings about kids who find a cache of tion doesn’t exactly crackle strange toys _ spinning rocks, a when it does. “Mimzy” has the Add-On Specials can only be used wriggling blob, an aged stuffed same E.T. “government agents” with the other offers on this page. rabbit doll _ in a box that washes tracking these goings on (Mi- Prices plus tax Limited Time Offer up near their beach house. chael Clarke Duncan is their WE DELIVER The kids, Noah and Emma chief), only with less menace (Chris O’Neil and Rhiannon and more incompetence. Leigh Wryn) keep the cache se- Still, that kid can make cret from their parents (Timothy you cry, and the story’s payoff is LARGE PIZZA Hutton and Joely Richardson). rich and heartwarming. It has a But it’s obvious they’ve gotten few moments that suggest the their hands on something ex- movie it might have become, traordinary. The stones spin and but the poor pacing robs the CHEESE & 1 TOPPING weave holographic pictures. The movie of urgency and emotion. doll whispers to Emma. It ap- Shaye marshaled this proj- PICK - UP DELIVERED pears to see all and know all. ect through his studio as a labor 1 OR MORE 2 OR MORE And the children _ the of love. No doubt that included girl’s 6, Noah’s about 9 _ start bringing in multiple screenwrit- doing amazing things, complex ers, including the Oscar–win- science projects for school, doo- ning Tibeta-phile, Mr. Rubin. dling obscure Tibetan picto- But Bob, don’t you re- 00 graphs. member that ancient Tibetan $ EACH00 $ EACH

That gets the attention of catch-phrase, “If you love some- PLUS TAX DeliveryPLUS charge mayTAX apply. the hipster science teacher thing, set it free”? 6 (Rainn Wilson of “The Office”). Or at least let somebody 5 Limited Time Offer Before you know it, a movie else direct. 8 smallTALK March 26, 2007 Volume 46, Issue 10 Sports

in. Neon Tennis - Other note worthies in- dio will have banked seating for Baseball Updates Susan Miller Degnan clude: senior Michael Ellsworth about 500 spectators with the Byron Lowe home games), two versus batting .500 with 32 at bats, and McClatchy Newspapers rest standing on the pitch-black Staff Writer Shenandoah (April 6, 7 road (MCT) sophomore Brad Davis dance floor that surrounds the games). Methodist will need to batting .358 in 42 at bats. (all MIAMI _ Nineteen-year- tennis court. A giant clock with The Monarch baseball improve in conference play to old tennis pro Marcel Good- statistics as of March 19, 2007) neon lights is projected on the team is off to a proficient start position themselves for a desir- Pitching Leaders man, ranked 1,014th in the back wall to keep score, show with an impressive record of 14 able position in the NCAA Re- world, knew he would never - Junior Chris Toth has replays and flash cool colors. A wins and only six losses. Under gionals (May 16 – 20). been the work horse so far for survive in the midday sunshine UV-intensive Gen Art fashion head coach Tom Austin the of this week’s Sony Ericsson the Monarchs pitching a total of show will take place in the dark Monarchs have never won fewer Performance Players 35.2 innings, with three wins, Open on Key Biscayne. between games, and renowned than 22 games in 26 seasons. Offense Leaders But when the dance-crazy and 26 strike outs while posting DJs Paul Oakenfold, Masters at The team is currently on a pace -Freshman Seth Kivett is a 2.52 ERA. teenager from Boca Raton, Fla., Work and Miami-based Murk to win at least 25 once again. making a huge contribution as a was invited to play in the dark - Sophomore Kurt Kelly will spin music from 1 a.m. to So far it seems the main rookie, batting .342 with 73 at is close behind with 35 innings under psychedelic ultra-violet 4a.m. issue for the team is conference bats. Kivett is also leading the lights in another Miami Sony pitched, while striking out 22, The fast-paced tourna- play where they own a 3 – 3 re- team with two homeruns, and in with a 3.34 ERA. Ericsson tennis tournament, he ment will be played on a spongy- cord, splitting their two-game runs batted in with 16. jumped at the chance. Specta- - Sophomore Elliott foam court with unconventional series with Ferrum, North Caro- - Senior Matt Hunt, is Bisplinghoff has three wins in tors will drink free booze and but simple rules and scoring. lina Wesleyan, and Greensboro. leading the team in runs scored groove to remixes by world fa- 30 innings pitched, and a quality Each game is limited to three The Monarchs have 6 games left 20, stolen bases with 11, and ERA of 1.50. mous DJs in town for the Win- minutes. Taylor even got well- versus conference opponents: base on balls with 12. ter Music Conference while - Freshman Fred Geis- known tennis umpire Debra two versus Christopher Newport - Senior Jonathan Spivey inger also has three wins with Goodman and his indoor oppo- “Vigi” Dreker of Boca Raton _ (Mar. 24, 25. road games), two is a steady contributor with 16 nents’ reflective outfits and ten- three saves and an impressive she has been a chair umpire or versus Averett (Mar. 31, Apr. 1. runs scored and 14 runs batted 1.80 era. nis equipment glow in neon linesman for the past 14 U.S. whites, pinks, blues, reds, Open finals _ to be the umpire. greens and purples. Each night’s winner among the 2006- 07 Schedule “That sounds awesome, eight mostly pro or former tour- September really cool, a glowing ball with ing players will get a trophy and Hang out in Hot-air Ballooning flashing lights like a disco with a pair of VIP tickets to the Sony a tennis tournament right in the Ericsson Open, which begins Sailing School- Annapolis, MD middle,” Goodman said. “I’ll Wednesday at the Tennis Center October try to stop from dancing in the at Crandon Park. White Water Rafting, Rock Climb middle of the point because I Don’t be surprised if some the outdoors! love to dance.” Sony Ericsson Open players pop & Rappelling Sony Ericsson has dubbed in for some late-night entertain- West Virginia, New York City, NY its new concept Night Tennis, ment. and it’s free to the first 1,200 “It’s out of this world, but November people 21 and older who regis- extremely fun,” said Sergio Swimming with Manatees- ter for tickets online at www. Moreno Gomez, 20, who plays night-tennis.com. The two-night for Madrid Polytechnic and Deep Sea Fishing- Carolina Beach event March 22 and 23 takes competed in the Madrid event December place at the Ice Palace Film Stu- last November. “It was quite dio in downtown Miami. electrifying, especially with the Cross-country Skiing, Snow Shoeing, Dean Taylor, Sony Erics- spotlights and music playing. & Dog Sledding son’s British senior manager of Having people dance by the side sponsorship marketing, created of the court while you were January the concept for a similar event playing was quite strange...” Downhill Skiing, Snowboarding, & last year at the Madrid School Next week’s players in- Tubing of Fashion. Taylor said Spanish clude Adriana Biasella, 26, of college players competed in Rome, who plays Futures and February “everything from specifically Challengers tournaments and is Horseback Riding School designed UV hooded tennis tops ranked 675, and Horacio Rearte, to A-line skirts with tennis balls 43, who grew up in Argentina Washington D.C. attached. and France and now lives in March “Visually, it’s incredible,” Boca Raton. he said. “Our vision was to “I heard it will be a bit dif- Join the Fishing, Snorkeling, & Scuba Diving knock down boundaries that put ferent because we’ll play with Key West, Florida (Spring Break) some people off to tennis _ black lights, disco lights, so the `Quiet please!’ _ and unleash ball will have a cool effect,” Bi- April some fun and excitement. Ten- asella said. “When the ball goes Outdoor Adventure Sea Kayaking, Claming, Surf Fishing nis to music is a great idea, and that fast and everything is dark, Outer Banks, NC the ball gets a tail-like comet ef- it could be tough to see. But the fect when it’s hit back and forth. color, the music and all the peo- Club May We’ll celebrate amazing shots ple dancing and drinking _ may- Backpacking, HikingGrand Canyon with light displays.” be tennis will be the least impor- The Ice Palace Film Stu- tant thing.”