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Felix Issue 170, 1962

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Felix Issue 170, 1962 rip i j v r IL. L I A, NEWSPAPER OF IMPERIAL COLLEGE UNION No. 176 FRIDAY, 18TH MAY, 1962. 4d. WORLD RECORD . HEAPE IN ACTION Broken in Beit Quad. CARNIVAL PROCESSION COLLECTS BARBECUE WASHED OUT £105 Unfortunately the Barbecue was washed out. There was some dismal dancing under The Carnival procession, winding its way the Marquis and most pepole adjourned to the through the astonished, bemused and gener- Week's Hall Bar, where from all accounts, ous inhabitants of Kensington, Fulham and queer happenings were witnessed. EGG. Chelsea, looked a cross between a Mardi Gras shenadigans and a Pyjama Party. Al- though it was competing for attention against SATURDAY AFTERNOON FETE the Cup Final, it collected over £105. 0 The previous evening, at 4 p.m. G.M.T. SAKE POPULAR AT I.C. a world record was atempted and broken at I.C. Mr. Heape swallowed two dozens eggs in the incredible time of 2 minutes and 11 The Carnival Week received a warm send sees. He had trained for the previous week off at the May Ball, but by Monday the tem- on a dozen eggs (large) at lunch-time. The po was positively vibrating; a fast, colourful, news was reported by the B.B.C. and made and exciting evening was put on by the over- the front page of the Guardian and the Ex- seas societies. The pace was set by H.E., the press. Ambassador of Tunisia (fulfilling his firtjt public appearance in England) briefly and fit- The Fete was poorly attended due to the tingly. After a succession of guitarists, vio- weather being inclement The Union at last linists, and comedians, the show reached a got its chance to pelt the executive, which magnificent climax with the West Indies Steel nearly got out of hand when at one stage, Band. Mention at this stage should be made carried away by enthusiasm and successful of Dan the Bomb who provided continuity rnarkmanship, die throwers didn't pay any- with jokes not in his usual repertoire. thing but just grabbed the rotten fruit and Meanwhile, back in the dining room, a vegetables and let go. constitution shattering assortment of national The exhibition of Judo was the highlight of . RECORD food was laid on — most popular? Chinese the afternoon. After watching a lot of girls tea. Unfortunately, one could not participate were heard expressing their desire to learn, wholeheartedly without serious risk of indi- judo, much to the obvious annoyance and gestion. At the bar, a delightful Geisha did apprehension of their boy-friends. a brisk trade in Sake, but beer still seemed to sell best. CARNIVAL ORGANISER JON BARE- After the interval some fine dancing by oriental beauties in national costume was fol- FORD AND JIM MARSHALL AND CAR- lowed by the popular Night Riders, a good noise group of U.S. Navy origins. NIVAL MAGAZINE EDITOR A. W. An encouraging feature of the evening, IRVINE WISH TO THANK EVERYONE which also included films and dancing, was the large number of visitors who doubtless CONCERNED FOR THEIR HARD WORK left with a good Impression of I.C.U. profit of over £70 was made for charity. IN MAKING THE CARNIVAL A SUCCESS. CARNIVAL RAFFLE Won bv C.G. Glasswel. Advertise No. 2 8 3 5 8 Amoxmt raised — £358.16.4 in FELIX BEATEN FELIX / have the highest regard for the Carnival Queen, and we all realise that her motives £eU&to in allowing- the photograph to be printedOu r student guests deserve the highest praise, who can tell, by Father IVOR SMITH CAMERON to however, where the Editor will lead us with the £dito* his journalistic dabbling. It just won't wash, Mr. Chandmal. If vou wiih to emulate the circulation figures of FELIX STINKS the Carnival Magazine, you'll have to find another way of doing it Dear Sir, Yours sincerely, "Pheonix" and "Scrutiny", in order to in- W. ALAN IRVINE crease their circulations, would pander to the Carnival Magazine Editor more basic instincts of the students, the mor- al standards and general tone of our fort- nightly newspaper were always above repro- ach. A PLEA FOR INSANITY I was therefore shoked when I opened my Felix dated May 4th to find myself staring at Dear Sir, the nearly naked form of our {very attract- We, the undersigned, were most disappointed ive) Carnival Queen. Fortunately, Miss o read the comments in your last issue un- Petri does not lend herself to pornography der the heading of "Your Guess" on page but this was obviously foremost in the mind six column three. In th's article, idiot or of the Editor when he had the picture prin- idiots unknown have attempted to place ted. methodical interpretation on the labels "In", In the name of common decency, I wish "Out", "Left". "Right", "Up", "Down" 0 protest most strongly that by inserting which one of\us placed on the letter racks such material in a Union publication, the in the Union Office at the request of the best interests of the College are not served. other. Now isn't this just typical of the in- 1 suggest that this is not the way to render human approach of the unimaginative, logic Felix solvent once more. Is Mr. Cfumdmal incensed technologist! Doesn't he under- giving us a newspaper or a 'Playboy'! stand that in thif high pressure world of People in positions of responsibility such Lvle-Stacev organisation and 'Business Meth- as the Editor must see to it that any corrup- ods we need some nonsensical outlet for our Seen on a notice board outside a place of tion of student morals must not occur be- frustrations. Let's have an Illogical Society. worship; cause of perusual of their magazines. They Yours insincerely, "SERMONS during the following Sundays must ensure that the contents of same are MR. & MRS. ROB will be on the following subjects; pure and decent. {Ex-Ed. & Perm. Sec.) GOD CHRIST COLOURED PEOPLE ORBITING IN THE NOOSPHERE bedroom and like Dad does he remember a DISEASES tiling the next morning O no he says took nu. Put in this way they sounded quite signific- by CATCALL twenty minutes to find what I call my car ant! and O my God like You should have been The telephone bells rings. 'Oh, I'm sorry Like my rival Colcutt has given up and in Weeks Hall the night when the sheep wa» for bothering you, but could you help? My Colcutt the second too and like how its only barbecued and like 1 say Dad it wasn't only friend from Accra can't find any accom- gonna be me this week as the Editor says the sheep that was fried that night like modation. He is studying at L.S.E." Such like {"Quick man fill six pages or you'll go here were the Secretary and President calls are frequent yet what can I do? I know the way of your forefathers") and me beine of I'd like to tell you but I can't and that the need is urgent while adequate accom- so alcoholically elevated that I almost or- certain members of Council and soccer play- modation for the persons concerned is scarce. bited out like man here I was with this un- ers and girl-friends and like this prominent But do something we must. dulating female at the May Ball and I dan- ICWArian is sitting next to this Council Of the 40,000 students from overseas cing and twisting like I got the aches man member and hitting him and teasing him and studying in this country, over half of them and what with seven pints fighting it out O I'm so sweet and coy and you big bully are in the London area. In 1945. there can- with the Salmon I said I must quick make and like how the big bully takes her and turns not have been more than 1.500 in the whole for the vouknowwhat and suddenly I hear a her around and smacks he daintily covered country, but by 1950 this had risen to 10,000 cry in distress. Pinners Fm p . and like I youknowwhat and the shenadigans that en- and to 30,000 in 1955. Of the 40,000 at pre- alwavs said if a man's drowning you got be sue like just then a man walks straight in sent in England, epproximately 10,000 are thre with a straw and so I rushed to the through the door only it wasn't and the glass at Technical Colleges. Another 10,000 are at bar and the barman he looked all queer so on the floor and on the door and like this the universities, and the rest at other instit- he could have been Martian (green he was is the third time in Week's Hall ; nd utes of learning, such as training colleges, and yellow looks) and so I rushed to the you- it was only the other night I pass a Inns of Court, trainees in industry, com- knowwhat and my holy cow if it ain't some- locked door and I hear voices (lmost merce students, evening class students etc. one (his stance curved like a Hockey stbk) ancestral) shouting and then I recognise Among the problems which confront visitors looking into the locked of the youknow with them like Dad the President of R.C.S. says from overseas are the following: a mirror like the Chairman's inside he says Hey iLawrie what do you thing of my article 1.
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