Deck The Dukes The V.M.L Cadet One of Americans Last Independent College Newspapers
VOLUME LXXVM Virginia Military Institute, Lexington, Virginia, September 26,1986 NUMBERS Polo Comes To VMI Page 2, The VMI Cadet, September 26,1986 s • V Letter To Editor On Tacs Checking Drawers
Santa Claus comes every Christmas eve and I always An Unjustified Accusation leave him some goodies by the tree.
But now my mind's troubled Last week's Cadet featured an article entitled daily and they didn't mention unprofessionalism as a and I'm not sure what to do, just "Culture Shock" in which the happenings that oc- cause for the Jordanians' leaving. what do you leave a Tac when cured during three Jordanian rats' short stay here at Col. Buchanan made his remarks based on what he he comes through? the Institute were discussed. Col. Harbach, the com- heard or thought, not on what he saw first hand in the My gloves in the drawer just mandant, Col. Hammond, the executive assistant to ratline. I myself ate lunch with one of the Jordanian weren't in good taste but that's the superintendent, and Col. Buchanan, the director rats. I didn't yell at him or belittle him in any way. I the fruit of a simple mind work- of admissions, were all asked their thoughts on the tried to reason with him, and the only thing I could get ing in haste. departure of these rats. him to say was, "we want to leave this place, sir." He A beer in the drawer didn't Both Col. Harbach and Col. Hammond made knew he wanted to leave then, and that was two weeks bring a smile, it just brought remarks to the effect that it was too bad these rats before he departed. I tried to treat him in a profes- that cadet PTs and confinement left, but VMI just wasn't the place for them. Col. sional way, and it didn't work. for a while. The Jordanian rats were handled with great care Buchanan had other thoughts. He said there were two I think I've finally got it now, reasons for the Jordanian rats leaving, one of them and the Corps bent as far as it could to accommodate this sincere little note just to let being that ''cadets are snots." them. But it wasn't meant to be. Col. Buchanan's you know I'm not really a dote: assumption that the Jordanian rats left in part When I read this I was surprised and outraged at "My drawers are in order and the same instance. How can Col. Buchanan justify his because, "cadets are snots," is unfounded and wrong. everything's in its place. You accusation that the Jordanian rats left because The Jordanian rats were given the best chance to stay need not bother check them, "cadets are snots"? that the corps could offer, and they couldn't accept time's too precious to waste." Colonel Buchanan said cadets are snots because, VMI. Cadet Kramer, P.R. "they harrass people about personal things: size of their ears, their mothers and families. They are un- professional." It is true that rats face being called nearly anything, and they are ridiculed endlessly. But every rat faces this. However, in the Jordanians' situation, special care was taken. During a meeting of the first class it was emphasized by the regimental commander that great care should be taken in handl- /f: ing these rats. Great care was taken, but the Jorda- nian rats were yelled at, they had to eat with forks and knives, and they had to take mass showers; just like every other cadet to come through VMI and make it. Was VMI supposed to change for them? No. When I came to VMI, alumni, faculty members, my dykes, and cadre members told me that I couldn't change VMI. I would have to change for VMI; just like every other cadet does. No one comes through VMI without changing. If it was known that the three Jordanian rats were The VMI Cadet so locked into their culture, they should have never 1986-1987 been admitted to VMI. If it wasn't known, hopefully, VMI has learned a lesson. That lesson is that VMI VIRGINIA MILITARY INSTITUTE isn't for everyone, and it isn't even for some young men who think it is for them. There are rats every Michael C. Moore year who leave VMI that are from the United States. Editor-in-Chief They leave because they can't accept the VMI way of life. It is no mark against them when they choose to A1 Leatherwood Dean Barr Managing Editor leave VMI, it is just learning that VMI isn't the place Business Manager for them to be. John Lightner This is the case with the Jordanian rats. They Associate Editor weren't meant to be at VMI and they left. If anything, every exception possible was made to accommodate these rats and they didn't adjust. FrancM Arahart Typist Chris Packham Distribution In remarks made about the rats' departure, Col. Lou Buonpana ... Naws a Faaturas Editor Todd Arris Circulation Harbach and Col. Hammond felt that the Jordanian T. Bruca Bonas Sports Editor Matt Morgan Alan Cowan Editorial Editor Alan Cowan Ad Manager rats just weren't ready culturally to tackle VMI's Curran Bo«van Entartainmant Editor system. They didn't blame cadets' unprofessionallsm Jack McCarttiy Columnist Brian Colllor Ptiotographar Wayna Fuiiar Consulting Editor for the Jordanian rats' departure. It seems they Victor SradI Uyout Editor Baaf Diasal Humor/Apologias would know the situation with these rats since they ManAtUrga work with the Corps on a daily basis. Col. Harbach has even commended the cadre for their profes- I '^""•'•y Institute, Is published ovary Friday sionalism in handling the rats. But Col. Buchanan, wll •he offices of who is very seldom seen in barracks, felt cadets were Li Th?VMi subscription Is $12.00 on post and $14.00 mailed off snots and unprofessional. I don't see how Col. th A Classniatter September 19.1944, at the Post Office In ® the VMI bar- Buchanan can be vindicated in his remarks. Col. Har- racks, and the mailing address is: Box 1, VMI, Lexington, Va. 244S0. bach and Col. Hammond work closely with the corps postal numberUSP654-880 The VMI Cadet, September S, 1986, Page 7 NCO's On Parade News and Features Rate Lou Buonpane Cadets Friday afternoon parade, a formation that is used by:EdLedford to show off tthe Corps, is a function that works Across a muddy drill field, "Gentlemen, prepare to automatically, and it has been working perfectly. low crawl!", rings out. The Corps of Cadets is showing itself, to be sure, on Polo Exhibition "Gentlemen, if you don't keep hot Friday afternoons, but in the poorest light. your butts down you're going to Misaligned rifles, khaki colored ducks and bad stance get them shot off!" Sgt 1st class poUute the VMI Parade Ground, shuffled in with the by: Lou Buonpane to us in handicap. The field was Alired Lane presides over the Wednesday afternoon, the very nice but short when com- Military Science cadets, as he unreliable and sometimes barely audible requests of seventeenth of September, the pared to a regulation size teaches them how to be platoon officers to keep their ranks in step. This is a VMI Parade Groimd was the field." soldiers. true representation of the Corps of Cadets though; site of a polo match between the Wilson also said that "The The NCO's at Virginia parade really does show VMI's internal state of af- British Combmed Services Polo Americans were used to their Military Institute are in a uni- fairs. No amount of 0:745 beard inspection by Com- Team and Farmington, a team own ponies and this was que situation. They teach young from Charlotte, N.C. definitely a factor throughout men how to fight and lead, and pany tactical officers will change this internal decay. This event has occurred the game; but we were thankful upon their graduation, the new The problem does not lie with some unlucky in- every two years since 1976, with for the use of them anyway." 2nd Lieutenants and Ensigns dividual's appearance who did not get enough sleep the American team travelling While the British Team is become their teacher's leaders. the night before. It lies with the minority of in- to Britain on alternating years. here in the States they will play After spending some twelve dividuals who are chosen to lead them. The series is sponsored by the eleven games against various years in the Army, and instruc- English Speaking Union. This opponents. Mr. E.S. "Tad" ting at VMI for soon to be three Military rank and structure does not exist in the year's match was won by the Humphreys, former VMI tennis years, SFC Lane speaks on the VMI Corps today; a set of gold chevrons to many is Americans, 10-6. coach and recently retired quality of leadership that the In- nothing more than a uniform improvement, not an in- The American Team was business manager of the Lex- stitute produces. "I think that dication of responsibility. made up of players from the ington News-Gazette, arranged after they are commission- many of the details required to ed,and go through OBC, I think Take the Third Class Corporal who possesses the Virginia area. Mr. Garrick Steele of Alexandria has been get the polo team to exhibit they'll be prepared... they're basic unit of rank in the Corps, the faults of his posi- playing polo for ten years and their skiUs at VMI. Dr. Herb going to make great leaders. tion are common to those on up the ladder of "respon- was joined on the team by his Jones, VMI Class of 1948B pro- The ones I've worked with in sibility." A corporal is supposedly in charge of his brother Audra, of Roanoke. vided the ponies used during the class, most of them have good Steele said "I like to try to match. Colonel Thomas Davis attitudes, they've got positive squad, but today he is not at all involved in this. All he of the History Department also attitudes." But would he follow does is take accountability, and maybe yell at some play every weekend. Polo is a fantastic game." About the had a hand in planning the mat- them into battle? He says yes. rats. He is never made truly responsible for the ap- British Team, Steele said "I en- ch, and said "I really love it "One thing I like about them is pearance or performance of his squad in ranks'! The joyed the challenge of playing a when they play here because they're honest. You can give Company Commander rarely delegates the task at different team. The Brits really polo has always been a part of them a mission and they would know how to play." the VMI scene." Major Tate of go ahead and accomplish it." hand to this squad leader, and he is thus put in the the ROTC Department, known "If they make a mistake they're This was the second time that position of having to ineffectively police the whole polo aficionado, said "I think honest about it, if they do Major Richard Wilson has been this is a great historical event. something right they're company himself. Before marching on to the Parade to the United States on a polo It brings back shades of the past honest." "One thing, regardless Ground platoon sergeants and lieutenants should in- tour. He said "the Americans here at the "I". of the group of folks you've got, form their ranks of exactly what is going to happen have a very strong team, equal there's always that one bad ap- and then be carefully watching to see who is not the ple.", he says humorously. best parader, or who needs help. This almost never Chief Banks of the Navy happens, and as a result any particular company does Department also spoke highly not work as one, but as many individuals. Until the of VMI cadets. "WeU, I've had military structure of the Corps is recoupled with its Chaplain's Corner the opportunity to serve with respective responsibilities, time will just be wasted two VMI officers. And I can say practicing clumsily for an event that is supposed to be throughout my 13-14 year career in the Navy that the two done with precision, but the true organization of the To Those Who Dare ninety-mne of them, VMI officers have been by far corps will remain on parade. The path to wisdom and do not conclude that the two of the greatest officers I've success journey is a failure. served with." What makes the is not for kings alone, it is Press on and up... cadets better Chief Banks says open to you and me. the prizes are generally at the is "the VMI tradition. I think You may not succeed at first, end it's because of the tradition of I but the failure of your efforts of an effort, not at its VMI they feel perhaps honored maybe beginning... to see bigger and better the needed preparation for and not to go on things." your final triumph. is to miss them. Back in the Military Science If there are a hundred steps in Be valiant.. .have faith... Department, SFC Block said your path to success Success belongs to those j(ddngly, "Do you really want And you have not reached it in who dare to win it. me to tell you what I think?" "As a lieutenant they George S.Forest turn around. As a cadet they're doubled up. They're a cadet and YouVe Successful? they're a college student. Everybody knows when you go You advertise in to college you're supposed to The VMI Cadet (continued on page 7) We are now accepting ads for Southern Inn Restaurant Serving VMI Cadets and the 1986-87 Cadet. Their Families Proudly If interested, contact for the Last 50 Years Alan Cowan or Matt Morgan,. VMi; Box 7, Members of the VMI Keydet Club Lexington, Va. 24450 37 S. MAIN ST. Page 2, The VMI Cadet, September 12,1986 Second Half Blues
Contrary to what was first five minutes of the game to sive machine. By scoring three predicted, the VMI Big Red take the lead early. After a cou- touchdowns in the second half Team played quite competitive- ple unsuccessful drives, the along with a field goal, the We Aren*t That Bad: ly against the Paladians of Fur- VMI offense finaUy got on the Paladins comfortably increas- man this past Saturday at board with a field goal by place ed their lead to 34-3 which re- An Opinion Alumni Memorial Stadium. For kicker Jim WaU from about 34 mained the final score. the first half, one could have yards out to close the gap. However, the VMI Keydets did by: Randy Janey And after a few moments of probably called the game an However, Furman managed to not go out without any close at- During the past couple of deep thought, the perfectly even match up with the Keydets boot a field goal to make the tempts at putting themselves days, specifically this post- logical answers came to mind. being down by only one halftime score 10-3 before the back on the board. The VMI of- Furman era, I have been ap- Firstly, we are a very young touchdown, 3-10, when heading Keydets ever bot on the board. fense just didn't click, and the proached by several cadets who team. I know, you say this "ex- into the locker room for After an impressive halftime defense continued to work hard. all asked me to "do them a cuse" is too easy to use and an halftime. performance by the Marine Overall, the performance of the favor." Well, I, being the easy way out. All right, that's The first half was more of a Corps silent drill team, VMI team was respectable and gracious, always-willing-to-do- true, but tell me how many defensive show for both sides. alunrni and cadets hoped for a adhered to the VMI standards. a-favor icind of guy said "sure, other division I football teams The VMI defense quickly similar performance as in the This week the VMI Keydets I'll be more than willing to help have only nine returning tightened the screws after they first half. However, Furman face the Dukes of James you fellas out." As it turned out, seniors. allowed Furman to score in the came out like a well oiled offen- Madison. the favor they asked was for me Secondly, our team is still in a to berate, belittle, verbally rebuilding stage. With the ar- bludgeon and "dog" the football rival of Eddie Williamson as team to the best of my ability head football coach, many for, what they called, "their changes have taken place over stellar performance during the slightly more than one football Runners' Furman massacre." season. A whole new philosophy Soccer Wins In Well, I considered this pro- of football is being integrated posal. I considered it for two into the existing system. This Dominate reasons: A. Mayt)e they were takes time. Newport News by: PeteCarty indeed correct in their ap- Finally, and possibly more The VMI cross-country team proach toward solving our foot- importantly, one must consider by: DanSchnock Thursday VMI travelled to easily defeated Samford ball team's woes; and B. I, too, the talent of the Furman Last week when Appalachian Newport News to try for its first University here Saturday in was rather irritated at the Palladins. This team was pick- State came to VMI they ex- victory. The VMI team was not their second meet of the year. Keydets' rather disappointing ed by almost every person and pected an easy victory, but denied what it had travelled so The Keydets took the first ten performance Saturday. agency who knows anything at what they got was far from an far for. They came away with places as the first Samford run- their firsfr victory beating ap- So, to solve my dilemna as to all about football, to win the easy victory. They did limp ner finished eleventh. Last prentice school 4-0. Goal whether I should write the arti- Southern Conference title. It is away with a 1-0 victory, but week the team competed in the scorers for VMI were Mike cle or not, I wrote a list of pros this same team that tied when the final whistle blew they Wake Forest Invitational. Williamson, Pete Monty, Kevin and cons in regards to the effect Georgia Tech just one week had given VMI the respect they For the second time. Second Cavanau^, and Jim Cottrel. which it would have on our foot- prior. The Palladins are a had been lacking. Appalachian Classman Greg Hoofnagle led Outstanctog defensive players ball program. Well, once this talented team with a well State met the tough defense of the way for VMI. He was follow- were Wilson Brown and Bill was finished, it was plain to see established program. VMI but held them close the ed by Second Classman Dale Melvin. The shutout was held by that not only would this "verbal Well, I've done my best to whole game. Defenders with Williams and First Classman good play in the set by all three attack" on our own football legitimize the football team's outstanding play were Mike Henry Loving, who were second keepers Rob Miller, Ned Hann- team accomplish nothing what- troubles. Obviously there are Pilley, John Draper, Dan and third respectively. Roun- ingan, and Jack Roman. The soever, but it would also pin- some "kinks" to be smoothed Schnock, Derick "Stonewall" ding out the top seven were Keydets hope to keep on the point me as an idiot for writing out, but just be patient. After McCown and Rob Schnock. Third Classmen Jack Toepfer wuuiing track by defeating such an editorial. Consequently all, as the saying goes, "Lex- When the ball had gotten by and Ed Rodriguez, and Rats Hampden-Sydney in their next (not wanting to look like an in^on was not built in a day," them they met the terrific play Steven Yarborough and Tar- home match. idiot) I decided to approach this so how can you expect our foot- of goalkeeper Rob Miller. rence Kemer. article differently. ball program to be. The next race for the cross- I decided there must be some Letters in response to the country team will be a dual logical manner in which to ra- editor are welcome. meet at James Madison Satur- Note: The Keydets defeated day, October 4. This should be a tionalize such a sound defeat. Hampden-Sydney 3-0 this past tou^ test for the Keydets as Wednesday. JMU usually has a good squad to provide excellent competi- tion. KINDLEY FORD SALES, INC.
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Estelle's Grill Alutn-BeimtH 123 Soutli Randolph St. CM it«r diitf fast Sarvka Headquarters for Corfam Shoes Foot LoiHrHol Dogs M.OO and Blue Blazers m West Washington St., Lexington, Va. Homturadt CtiiM M.OO Chargt Accounts viSA Masttr Chargt John Johnson - Cadet Representative ''national Bo''Botr > .75 Tht VMI Cadtt, Stpftmbtr 26, pagt 5 VMI vs. Jomes Moditon Dukes The Game: James Madison Dukes Date: Saturday, September 27,1986 Site: JMU Stadium (omni-turf) Cap. 15,000
Kickoff: 7:30 P.M. Attraction: Government Day Expected Attendance: 11,500
COACHES: LAST WEEK: JMU is coached by Joe Purzycki (Delaware 71). Purzycki is in his se- Furman broke open a tight 10-3 game with three third quarter cond season as coach of the Dukes where he has a record of 5-9-0 and 0-1 touchdowns in route to a 34-3 win over the Keydets. Each touchdown in vs. VMI. the period resulted from a Chris Bunn interception. VMI is coached by Eddie Williamson (Davidson 74) who enters his se- cond season as coach of the Keydets where he has a mark of 3-9-1 and 1-0 On the day VMI had seven turnovers, five of those coming after inter- vs. JMU. mission. Two Keith Moore to Kirk Bennett touchdown passes came just three and a half minutes apart midway thru the third quarter, and SERIES & LAST MEETING: tailback Robbie Gardner had an 11 yard touchdown run with 2:08 remain- This will be the fourth meeting between the Shenandoah Valley schools ing in the period. The Paladins added a 39 yard Mike Wood field goal in and the Keydets hold a 2-1 advantage. The Dukes claimed the only the fourth period for its final score. previous meeting in Harrisonburg, a 21-17 decision in 1984. Last season, Furman limited VMI to just 62 yards rushing, while the Paladins VMI utilized a tough defense and excellent field position to post a 14-7 vic- balanced attack churned out 342 yards total offense. Gardner rushed for tory over state rival James Madison at Lexington. The Keydets rode the 88 yards on 13 carries and two touchdowns while Moore completed 8 of 15 record setting performance of quarterback Al Comer, who set records for passes for 145 yards and two TDs. single game completions (23) and career total offense (3,751). All the scoring occurred in the first half, and the Keydets tallied on their first James Madison lost five fumbles, had two passes intercepted, and had possession when they moved 51 yards in 13 plays, consuming 6:27 off the two punts blocked as they lost their third consecutive game, a 17-7 deci- first period clock. Fullback John Parrott slanted over left guard from the sion to Liberty University. four yard line for the-touchdown with 8:33 remaining. After an exchange Liberty recovered one of the blocked punts in the endzone to tie the of punts, the Dukes mounted a drive and scored on the last play of the first game at 7-7 in the third quarter. The Flames added a field goal late in the quarter when fullback Warren Marshall slammed into the endzone from period and scored a touchdown early in the fourth quarter after a Mickey the one. VMI then embarked on what proved to be the winning drive when Page interception which he returned to the JMU two yard line. they covered 80 yards in 13 plays with Parrott's 34 yard gain proving to be the crucial blow. Tailback Trent Bridges, dove in from the two arid the The Dukes piled up 469 yards total offense to 239 for Liberty. Halfback Keydets led 14-7 with 2:16 remaining in the half. The VMI defense Warren Marshall rushed for 118 yards on 21 carries for JMU. stymied the Duke ground attack in the second half and did not allow JMU to cross midfield in the second half. The Keydets held a huge advantage in time of possession for the game, controlling the ball for 41:36 to James Madison's 18:24.
LasUVeePsHigh^^ Page 2, The VMI Cadet, September 12,1986 At Ease Lime Kiln Curran Bowen Strikes Again He was an outlaw, lawman, preacher, ladies' man and maybe a murderer. For the past decade his story, told by Autumn Frolic Don Baker, Gary Slemp and Frankie Taylor, has captured the imagination of audiences all With the official end of sum- Sunday also provides choice over America from tiny towns mer, the Shenandoah Valley alternatives. The Randolph with funny names like Grundy has begun to take on the look of Macon calendar features The and Slap Out to huge cities wiUi autumn. Try to pause for a mo- Deal in the Dell from 2 p.m. to 6 not so funny names like New ment in your busy day and ad- p.m. You might tote along an York, Washington and Las mire the firey colors of the extra pack or two because it Vegas. trees. It has begim to cool down may be one of those dry ones. The story of Red Fox/Second Red Fox/Second Hangin' — Left to right are Frai a bit during the evening hours, Nobody enjoys a desert party! Hangin', with its original cast, Slemp, and Don Baker. Photo Credit: Dan Carraco so this might be the last en- The other Sunday option will be performed under the doors in the fall, when the clear spinning.'' joyable weekend for outdoor ac- resides outside Charlottesville stars, just west of Lexington in stars and woodsmoke carry you "It is remarkable entertain- tivity, and the events available at Foxfield. The races begin a special one night only produc- back to the days when families ment," said the Christian are many. about 2 p.m., but the party tion at Lime Kiln Arts theater gathered around their camp- Monitor. "Working on an The VMI Rugby Club has a traditionally starts many hours on Saturday, September 27, fires to tell tales of long ago.'' almost bare stage with the match scheduled at JMU early before. There is a minimum beginning at 8 p.m. "Red Fox/Second Hangin'" simplest of props, the cast Saturday afternoon, so split as charge per person at the gate, "The show casts the same tells the story of Doc Taylor, a draws the spectator ir- soon as possible and get up however, there is a maximum kind of breathless spell that a realtive of Baker's who was the restistibly into this strange there for an early start. The good time inside. Even if masterful teller of ghost tales second man ever hanged in story of mountain conflicts, the party following the match is a equestrian sport is not your sad- can induce," said the Atlanta Wise County. The well resear- coming of big-money exploiters guaranteed smash. dle, hoof it up to Charlottesville Journal. ched story comes from musty and the corruption of justice." If Rugby is not your cup of for what will probably be the Don Baker, Lime Kiln's pro- old court records, photographs, "Smooth as applejack and tea, then perhaps Van Ripers best party of the weekend. ducing director who co- newspapers and the recollec- just as powerful," said the Lake can quench your thirst. For those non-travelling authored, directed and acts m tions of old-timers which tell the Charlotte Observer. Saturday afternoon's lineup types get yourself over to the the show, says the show is com- story not only of Red Fox, but Boston critic Elliot Norton features The Waxing Poetics, Lime KiUi Theater and really ing to town by popular demand. also the vanishing way of life in said that it is the finest stage Indecision, the White Animals, impress your date. "There are a lot of people who the mountains. production he had seen in the and Awareness Art Ensemble, Drive safely, especially if you want to see it and thought it The New York Times said it past ten years the work itself, a reggae band. are attempting to attend all would be back this summer." is, "as stirring for ite historical the staging and the artistry these events. And, Baker said, "I've always detective work as for the (continued on page 7) wanted to perform the show out- vanishing art of frontier yam- Sound Off LIME KILN ARTS Hoodoo Gurus ''Stoneage Romeos by: Scott McCumber "Stoneage Romeos" was album. There isn't a poor song presents It's pretty unusual to review released late in 1984, but has on the album. an album that's over a year old, gotten little publicity. The Since "Stoneage Romeos", but in this case it isn't so bad, music is very entertaining, pro- the band has released another ROADSIDE THEATER'S since most people have never viding a good mix t>etween rock album, "Mars Needs Guitars." heard of the Hoodoo Gurus. The and country, with a little punk This is a good follow-up to name alone is enough to scare thrown in. The guitarist. Brad "Stoneage Romeos", so the most people away, and suffice it Shei^erd, plays fast and loud, Gurus are definitely not a fluke. to say that little exposure is but with a unique folksy twang, So pick up a copy of "Stoneage RED FOX/ given to the Gurus music on the and the lyrics are quite good. Romeos" next time you're great radio stations in our area. The first side of the album is home (progressive music has Hopefully, this will better ac- somewhat better than side two, yet to arrive in Lexington) and SECOND HANGIN' quaint you with the Gurus. as "I Want You Back" and "To- give it a listen. Chances are The Hoodoo Gurus hail from jo", probably the album's best you'll discover something you the land down under, Australia, two songs, are on the first side. like without your favorite radio and are one of the best bands However, the listener isn't station drilling it into your from Kangaroo land in years. bored for the remainder of the brain. It's quite refreshing. THIS SATURDAY ONLY, m: SEPTEMBER 27
8:00p.m. at the Kiln
"...genuine Americana at its best." Las Vegas Sun
"...the most strikingly original show..." San Francisco Chronicle
"...with no pretensions whatever, but with talent and charm.*'
The New Yorker For information call 463-3074. Qaron von Tate I, United States Air Force 0. Admission $9.00. Tht VMI caatT, jtpTtmotr m, IVM/ rag« / Lime NCO's Kiln (continued from page 3) (continued from page 6) have fun. Some of them come A limited number of seats is down here and play Patten", available for the show. Admis- but SFC Block doesn't think sion is $9. For tickets call (703) they should act like Patton, 463-3074. "No, heU no, while they're at To get to The Kiln, take Route College they should enjoy col- 60 West from the center of Lex- lege as much as they can." ington, turn left on Borden Road Right now this is not soldiering (at the blinking light on top of time, it's cadet time, college the hill just outside of town), time." Would he foUow them to and follow the signs. battle? "Because he gets com- Nights at The Kiln can be chU- missioned on May 16, doesn't ly, so theater officials remind mean I'm going to follow him to folks to dress warmly and bring batUe." Block beUeves that an extra sweater or blanket. after OBC, the cadets will come iround and be leaders. "Usual- y always, they present Courtesy of iiemselves as a 'dadgone' eader." Lime Kiln Arts, Inc.
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RHETT CLARKSON Diamonds Are Not PRESIDENT RESIDENCE: (804) 358.9824 You mean DADDY LIED? Forever RICHMOND
Did you know that the tiny tip of your phonograph needle can exert over CORRUQMH>BOK 50,000 pounds of pressure per square inch on the grooves of your records? And phonograph needles - even diamond tipped needles COMMNY - are "forever". The useful life of a diamond needle is 400 to 600 playing hours, or about 1200 to 1800 plays of a 33 '/s R.P.M. record. After that amount of time, the diamond begins to wear into a chisel-like point...a point that can gouge and permanently damage your records, before you even know EAST LEX All Diamond needles are sold at off list price every day Hot Dogs 48^ Skoal/ Copenhagen $1.1S Q: How do I go about replacing my Some Questions needle? Stroh's, 12-Pack, Cans $3,99 AndAnswers: A: Flip Side has a complete line of Pfanstiehl and other Diamond 9 Ocinm M * IIINIH^IIimIiImIiiLII U.S. 11 NorHi Q: I don't know how many hours of play- needles. Since there are over 900 ing time my diamond needle has now, varieties of phonograph needles When should I replace it?' available, you will need to provide us A: Now. The cheapest insurance you will with information to insure our finding London Leather the proper replacement for you. The ever provide for your valued record more of the following you can bring to collection investment is a brand new Boot Shoppe Ltd. Flip Side with you. the better: needle bffore it's too iate. Lexington-B.V. Shopping Center near D.M.V. Q: I keep my records and needle clean, • Your old needle. but I'm starting to hear some minor • The brand name and model number of distortion. Will a new needle correct your cartridge (the part into which the One Day Service on All Work! that? needle fits). A: Sorry. If you are hearing distortion, • The brand nanie and model number of Excellent Leather Shoe Repair. that record is already damaged. A new your stereo. needle will prevent damage to your • The brand name and model number of other records. your last replacement needle. Page 8, The VMI Cadet, Septembar 2A, 1986 Humor Beef Diesel Dartboard
Major Hanly, why do you run Fananous Gayle, A.K.A. ToUey, that's two strikes with Famer's, come on down to the Sparks this week for those snaz- the stick with a baseball bat? Cadet Captain/Cheerleader: th6 Pep RaUys. One more and Cadet room and yourself and zy low-quarters at the Sweet- Just because you are short, Rah Fananous Gayle, Rah, you're out! Beef can discuss the ramifica- briar Dell Party last weekend. don't worry — those mean Rah, Rah. Rah-Rah, Cadet Cap- Hey, Suthard, if you can have tions of how to lead a winning Way to go, Kent! No doubt, cadets won't beat you up. You tain, 1.9, 1.9, 1.9! Oh, the in- a pow-wow on the first stoop life. Doupnik would be proud of his can do it with a coat hanger just justices of life at the "I". after Taps with all of the Hall of The Tom Doupnik properly prize-pupil! like everyone else; except for Scott Armstrong, you durable dressed award goes to Kent Major Tate — he needs a stick stud, you. When you get back with a portable seat on it just to from New York, please teach us get attention. Look, Sir, Buford how to be a non-stop love T. Pusser you are not! machine like you! The award for clothing treno- New Book in the Bookstore: setter of the week goes hands Self-Made Greatness: How I down to Monte Ferguson for Did It, By Kevin Sincavale. wearing those really sharp jun- "Mr. Turnout-In-The-Mess- gle fatigues, jungle boots and Hall; any questions come by casual "Ranger" black t-shirt Room 181." Autographed copies to MS Lab this week. Oh, wait, available. Coming soon: How let's not forget the "Ranger" To Tell Everyone Tactfully (?) tab on the patrol cap to top off That You Are The Best. the stunning ensemble! Monte, Hey, Party Jack Avis, how the uniform for MS Lab is can you he so cool if you are not Pickle Suit, and anyway, did on the Folding staff this week? you not know that the Ranger Party-down at parade this Platoon has been cancelled this week,Jack! semester due to lack of in- Capt. Suthard, contrary to terest? what Time magazine says, the Hey, Room 202, no Confed- MAFIA is alive and well, and a erate flag, huh? This is 1986. certain Cadet Staffer's father The Civil War ended in 1865. But (and Beef Diesel's Godfather) then again, we guess nothing is is on his way down for Parent's really over until your permit Weekend! Watch out for suit gets slammed right, "Southern wearing wrap-around sunglass- Gentlemen"?!? Get a grip!!! es and a red carnation. and Arboneaux, you're from Oh yes. Major Hanly, you join California! the ranks of Capt. Suthard by Capt. Suthard, nobody but running a late stick on Wednes- nobody bones Cadet Waiters! day night. Once again, need we Also, by running the stick on the remind you that Wednesday is second, third and fourth stoops the Boys'Night Out! before 2030 and not running it on the first stoop, you have proven Hey Volant, what is the deal? yourself (no doubt about it) the Were you at the Third Class biggest loser of the Tac staff meeting gaining some tips on this year. You are obviously a how to run your class? We Band Co. product, and we pro- heard you didn't have anything mise, you have earned yourself to say, but were taking notes. a spot in the Dartboard in- What are you trying to do, end definitely. How are you going to up like Spears? lose next week? Hey Scott Jones and Echo Frye, nice dyke-job at Guard Company Staff — we see you Mount Thursday. Do you mean are winning again by not letting to tell us you didn't get enough anyone join on to your com- of it last year? How much pany. Hope your Garrett An- money have you earned, or did drews scores go up, bunch of you spend it all on Snickers Geeks! bars? PuNJtooANjs rNC. Tltt-rtri ^ Sco-H- "AMAd Rft-SH^a" Mc-C'v^/^^bci- , a (^ov/tf ihfeide- OKirvK Nooo, (^rouy^ t-Vv; Rvro,,ic c^rtx-AcA/^cC^-Yvbe r i-i. 5?l. V vC.^ie Nio , OC+i.dc , cJe