“What Is Primary Abuse?” Is the First Step to Healing
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Emotional & Verbal Abuse
24-Hour Crisis & Support Hotline If you are the victim 315-468-3260 of abuse TTY Crisis Line talk to someone who 315-484-7263 (business hours) Emotional & understands and can help Outside Syracuse you explore options & Onondaga County Verbal Abuse New York State YOU DO NOT DESERVE CALL THE Domestic & Sexual Violence Hotline TO BE ABUSED VERA HOUSE 1-800-942-6906 24-HOUR CRISIS & www.opdv.state.ny.us SUPPORT HOTLINE TTY Hotline 315-468-3260 1-800-818-0656 TTY CRISIS LINE (business hours) 315-484-7263 This project is supported by Grant No. 2006-FW-AX-K015 awarded by the Office on Violence Against Women, U.S. Department of Justice. The Vera House, Inc. opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this publication are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views Administrative & Outreach Offices of the Department of Justice, Office on Violence Against Women. funded by: Onondaga County 24-Hour Crisis State of New York 723 James Street Private Donations Syracuse, NY 13203 & Support Line Original content by Esther E. Gray in phone: 315-425-0818 collaboration with the Syracuse Area Domestic fax: 315-425-8942 (315) 468-3260 & Sexual Violence Coalition www.verahouse.org You are not alone You are being emotionally or verbally abused if your partner or YOU DO NOT DESERVE care provider... TO BE ABUSED • puts you down in public or private • causes you to feel confused, “crazy”, unsure, or afraid If you believe you are in when you are around them a verbally or emotionally • keeps you from using a phone, TTY, car, money, or other abusive relationship, shared possessions please contact someone • withholds approval, appreciation, or affection as punishment or ignores you • withholds or changes medication Domestic violence occurs in all • uses your diagnosis, if you have one, as an excuse to hurt kinds of relationships, without you regard for race, gender, class, • ignores or makes fun of your feelings sexual orientation, ethnicity, age, religion or ability. -
The Types of Abuse – Dan Hitz Dan Is the Director of Reconciliation Ministries and Is a Survivor of Sexual and Spiritual Abuse
The Types of Abuse – Dan Hitz Dan is the director of Reconciliation Ministries and is a survivor of sexual and spiritual abuse. He is an ordained minister and a licensed professional counselor in the State of Michigan. This article is part of a series on recovery from abuse. Abuse takes many forms and can affect people from any cultural and economic background. Its effects can go deep, carving painful ruts into the survivor’s heart that can challenge his social and professional interactions for the rest of his life. The first step in fixing a problem is understanding that there is a problem. This article will help identify the five main types of abuse. Future articles will explore the effects of abuse, the profile of an abuser, and the steps to recovery from abuse. Abuse occurs when a person in a perceive position of power exerts that power over another for their own gain, at the expense of the person of lesser power. We commonly think of this between an adult and a child, such as a parent abusing his child or a teacher abusing her student. Abuse can also occur between an adult who has a perceived position of power over another adult, such as a supervisor abusing an employee. Abuse can also happen when a child exerts his perceived power over another child, to the detriment of the other child, who may be younger or physically weaker than the dominant child. Abuse happens when an aggressive child forces a compliant child to do something harmful that he does not want to do. -
On Gaslighting: How to Dominate Others 31 Without Their Knowledge Or Consent 3 on Questioning Used As a Covert Method 47 of Interpersonal Control
Gaslighting, the Double Whammy, Interrogation, and Other Methods of Covert Control in Psychotherapy and Analysis Gaslighting, the Double Whammy, Interrogation, and Other Methods of Covert Control in Psychotherapy and Analysis THEO. L. DORPAT, M.D. JASON ARONSON INC. Northvale, New Jersey London This book was set in 11 pt. Berkeley Book by Alpha Graphics of Pittsfield, New Hamp shire, and printed and bound by Book-man of North Bergen, New Jersey. Copyright © 1996 by Jason Aronson Inc. 10 9 8 7 6 54 3 2 1 All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No pan of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission from Jason Aronson Inc. except in the case of brief quotations in reviews for inclusion in a maga zine, newspaper, or broadcast. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Dorpat, Theodore L Gaslighting, the double whammy, interrogation, and other methods of covert control in psychotherapy and analysis I Theo. L Dorpat. p. em. Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 978-1-56821-828-1 l. Psychoanalysis-Moral and ethical aspects. 2. Control (Psychology) 3. Psychotherapist and patient-Moral and ethical aspects. 4. Mental suggestion-Moral and ethical aspects. 5. Brainwashing. 6. Manipulative behavior. I. Title. [DNLM: 1. Power (Psychology) 2. Psychotherapy. 3. Psychoanalysis-methods. WM 420 D715i 19961 RCS06.D668 1996 616.89'14-dc20 DNLMIDLC for Library of Congress 96-14098 Manufactured in the United States of America. Jason Aronson Inc. offers books and cas settes. For information and catalog write to Jason Aronson Inc., 230 Livingston Street, Northvale, New Jersey 07647. -
Joking, Teasing Or Bullying? • a Kid Who Isn’T Very Nice to You Trips You in the Hall for the Third Time This Week
LESSON 2 It Takes One Unit Joking, Teasing Grade 2 • Ages 7-8 TIME FRAME or Bullying? Preparation: 15 minutes Instruction: 30-60 minutes Students will distinguish the difference MATERIALS between joking, teasing and bullying and Large white poster sheet divided understand how joking, teasing and bullying into three columns with the following headings: Joking, Teasing, Bullying can strengthen or weaken relationships. Create three signs, one that says “JOKING”, another that Lesson Background for Teachers says, “TEASING”, third that says “BULLYING”; post on different walls This lesson builds on previous lessons in this unit. before class For more information on bullying visit PrevNet, an anti-bullying organization that RAK journals provides research, information and resources. www.prevnet.ca Kindness Concept Posters for Assertiveness, Respect Key Terms for Students LEARNING STANDARDS Consider writing key terms on the board before class to introduce vocabulary and increase understanding. Common Core: CCSS.ELA-Literacy. SL.2.1, 1a-c, 2, 3 Colorado: Compre- JOKING To say funny things or play tricks on people to make them hensive Health S.4, GLE.3, EO.a-c; laugh. Joking is between friends, makes all people laugh, Reading, Writing and Communicating isn’t meant to be mean, cruel or unkind, doesn’t make S.1, GLE.1, EO.b-f; S.1, GLE.2, EO.a-c people feel bad and stops before someone gets upset. Learning standards key TEASING Teasing doesn’t happen often. It means to make fun of someone by playfully saying unkind and hurtful things to the person; it can be friendly, but can turn unkind quickly. -
I Hold Your Heart I Hold Your Heart
I Hold Your Heart Teaching Guide INTRODUCTION I Hold Your Heart by Karen Gregory is suitable for teaching to students aged 14+. The four extracts included in this Teaching Guide introduce students to the themes and ideas in the story and are accompanied by corresponding discussion questions and activities. The themes covered in this pack are useful for stimulating RHSE or extra-curricular debate around important contemporary issues – ‘gaslighting’ and abusive relationships, being watched by others, coercion and control, social media, and identifying real, true love. ‘I Hold Your Heart is a thoughtful presentation of how abuse can manifest in young relationships and how difficult it can be to escape and digest the complex feelings that surround it. Young women are at a heightened risk of experiencing partner abuse and novels such as this play such an important role of highlighting the warning signs and support available for themselves and their peers. We would encourage all young adults to read this beautiful and heartbreaking piece of writing that leaves you more informed and better equipped to engage in healthy relationships.’ Solace Women’s Aid CONTENTS EXTRACT 1: Being Watched (taken from Chapter 1) Objectives: Consider the subject of being watched and how it feels; write a poem entitled ‘Watching Me’ describing an experience of being watched. Subjects: Reading Comprehension and Inference, RSHE, Speaking and Listening, Design, Art and Technology, Creative Writing: Poetry EXTRACT 2: Gaslighting (taken from Chapter 22) Objectives: Roleplay an important scene from the text; create a poster entitled ‘Recognising Gaslighting’ advising young people how to recognise and avoid abusive relationships. -
Getting Beneath the Surface: Scapegoating and the Systems Approach in a Post-Munro World Introduction the Publication of The
Getting beneath the surface: Scapegoating and the Systems Approach in a post-Munro world Introduction The publication of the Munro Review of Child Protection: Final Report (2011) was the culmination of an extensive and expansive consultation process into the current state of child protection practice across the UK. The report focused on the recurrence of serious shortcomings in social work practice and proposed an alternative system-wide shift in perspective to address these entrenched difficulties. Inter-woven throughout the report is concern about the adverse consequences of a pervasive culture of individual blame on professional practice. The report concentrates on the need to address this by reconfiguring the organisational responses to professional errors and shortcomings through the adoption of a ‘systems approach’. Despite the pre-occupation with ‘blame’ within the report there is, surprisingly, at no point an explicit reference to the dynamics and practices of ‘scapegoating’ that are so closely associated with organisational blame cultures. Equally notable is the absence of any recognition of the reasons why the dynamics of individual blame and scapegoating are so difficult to overcome or to ‘resist’. Yet this paper argues that the persistence of scapegoating is a significant impediment to the effective implementation of a systems approach as it risks distorting understanding of what has gone wrong and therefore of how to prevent it in the future. It is hard not to agree wholeheartedly with the good intentions of the developments proposed by Munro, but equally it is imperative that a realistic perspective is retained in relation to the challenges that would be faced in rolling out this new organisational agenda. -
Examining the Invisibility of Girl-To-Girl Bullying in Schools: a Call to Action
Examining the Invisibility of Girl-to-Girl Bullying in Schools: A Call to Action Suzanne SooHoo It does not matter whether one is 13, 33, or 53 years old, but if you are female, chances are that other girls have bullied you sometime in your lifetime. Bullying is not the kind of abuse that leaves broken bones; rather, it is a dehumanizing experience that manifests itself in the form of rumor spreading, name calling, psychological manipulation, character assassination, and social exclusion. Female teachers who are former victims of girl bullies or who themselves have been complicit with girl-to-girl bullying, consistently casting a blind eye to this ritualized social degradation, allowing it to continue generation after generation. The purpose here is not to blame teachers, but rather to seek an answer to "What are the social or institutional forces that prevent adults in the schools from seeing what they may have experienced themselves?" Throughout generations, girls have been bullied. The dehumanizing rituals and practices, passed on from mother to daughter, have survived even when the victims have not. Damaged young girls become damaged adult women. Mothers who did not know what to do when they were girls still do not know how to handle girl-to-girl bullying as women (Simmons, 2002). Many are unable to intervene when their daughters are bullied and they continue to be victims of adult female bullies. Through the process of "othering" (SooHoo, 2006), girl bullies determine who is valued and who is not and, as such, girl-to-girl bullying contributes to a social hierarchy of privilege and oppression. -
Strategies for Handling Teasing/Bullying
Strategies for Handling Teasing/Bullying Aarti Nair, Ph.D. Postdoctoral Fellow & Clinical Instructor UCLA PEERS Clinic Semel Institute for Neuroscience & Human Behavior Department of Psychiatry & Biobehavioral Sciences Background about PEERS® • International program – Developed at UCLA in 2004 – Adolescent program has been translated into over a dozen languages – Used in over 25 countries • Evidence-Based Social Skills Programs: – PEERS® for Preschoolers – PEERS® for Adolescents – PEERS® for Young Adults 1 Identifying Peer Rejected and Socially Neglected Youth with ASD § Peer rejection § Teasing and bullying § Bad reputations § Actively seeking out peers § ADHD, Mood disorders, Impulse control disorders § Social neglect § Isolated and withdrawn § Ignored and unnoticed § Actively avoiding peers (Volkmar & Klin, 1998; Bauminger & Kasari, 2000; Orsmond, Krauss, & § Anxiety, Depression Seltzer, 2004; Koning & Magill-Evans, 2001; LeCouteur et al., 1989; Marks, Schrader, Longaker, & Levine, 2000; GHaziuddin & Gerstein, 1996; Twatchman-Cullen, 1998; HempHill & Siperstein, 1990; CHurch, Alisanki, AmanullaH, 2000) Consequences of Peer Rejection Peer rejection is one of the strongest predictors of: • Mental health problems – Anxiety – Depression • Juvenile delinquency • Early withdrawal from (BuHrmeister, 1990; Matson, Smiroldo, & Bamburg, 1998; school Miller & IngHam, 1976) 2 Consequences of Peer Rejection • Depression • Anxiety • Loneliness • Low self-esteem • Substance abuse • Poor academic performance • Suicidal ideation (Hawker & Boulton, -
Introduction to Mobbing in the Workplace and an Overview of Adult Bullying
1: Introduction to Mobbing in the Workplace and an Overview of Adult Bullying Workplace Bullying Clinical and Organizational Perspectives In the early 1980s, German industrial psychologist Heinz Leymann began work in Sweden, conducting studies of workers who had experienced violence on the job. Leymann’s research originally consisted of longitudinal studies of subway drivers who had accidentally run over people with their trains and of banking employees who had been robbed on the job. In the course of his research, Leymann discovered a surprising syndrome in a group that had the most severe symptoms of acute stress disorder (ASD), workers whose colleagues had ganged up on them in the workplace (Gravois, 2006). Investigating this further, Leymann studied workers in one of the major Swedish iron and steel plants. From this early work, Leymann used the term “mobbing” to refer to emotional abuse at work by one or more others. Earlier theorists such as Austrian ethnologist Konrad Lorenz and Swedish physician Peter-Paul Heinemann used the term before Leymann, but Leymann received the most recognition for it. Lorenz used “mobbing” to describe animal group behavior, such as attacks by a group of smaller animals on a single larger animal (Lorenz, 1991, in Zapf & Leymann, 1996). Heinemann borrowed this term and used it to describe the destructive behavior of children, often in a group, against a single child. This text uses the terms “mobbing” and “bullying” interchangeably; however, mobbing more often refers to bullying by more than one person and can be more subtle. Bullying more often focuses on the actions of a single person. -
Romans 12 Verses 9 to 21 PART 2 SERMON 2021.Pdf
1 St. Andrew’s Presbyterian Church Bless, Don’t Curse Followers of Jesus are to respond to hatred with love. Scripture: Romans 12:9-21 Rev. Steve Filyk July 11, 2021 Opening Hymn: #350 to God be the glory Choruses: The power of the cross & Whom shall I fear Closing Hymn: #637 Take my life Can you remember the last time someone said something or did something to hurt you? [just to be clear I’m not talking about physical/mental/sexual abuse But people being uncaring and mean] Can you remember the last time someone said something or did something to hurt you? Maybe they joked about your weight… Maybe they criticized a decision… Maybe they ‘borrowed’ something without asking… So how did you respond? How did you respond? In the movie John Wick we meet the title character, An orphan who had been raised by Russian mob to become a notorious hitman. After many years of violence He retires from this old life, And adopts a peaceful existence. 2 That is until someone makes the mistake Of breaking into his home, stealing his vintage car, And most egregiously, killing his dog… a dog who was a gift from his recently departed wife. This transgression draws Wick out of retirement To unleash vengeance against those who had hurt him. Wick avenges his dog with 91 deaths. Talk about over-kill. But what is more astounding than the body-count Is the success of this franchise. The first three films in this series have grossed over half a billion dollars. -
Emotional Child Abuse
Fact Sheet: Emotional Child Abuse What is it? Emotional child abuse is maltreatment which results in impaired psychological growth and development.i It involves words, actions, and indifference.2 Abusers constantly reject, ignore, belittle, dominate, and criticize the victims.1,3 This form of abuse may occur with or without physical abuse, but there is often an overlap.4 Examples of emotional child abuse are verbal abuse; excessive demands on a child’s performance; penalizing a child for positive, normal behavior (smiling, mobility, exploration, vocalization, manipulation of objects); discouraging caregiver and infant attachment; penalizing a child for demonstrating signs of positive self-esteem; and penalizing a child for using interpersonal skills needed for adequate performance in school and peer groups.1,3 In addition, frequently exposing children to family violence and unwillingness or inability to provide affection or stimulation for the child in the course of daily care may also result in emotional abuse.3 How is it identified? Although emotional abuse can hurt as much as physical abuse, it can be harder to identify because the marks are left on the inside instead of the outside.4 Not surprising, there exist few well-validated measures of childhood emotional abuse. Clinicians can use a revised version of the Child Abuse and Trauma Scale (CATS) which targets measures for emotional abuse.5 Caregivers can also closely observe children’s behaviors and personalities. Children suffering from emotional abuse are often extremely loyal -
Developing the Covert Traumatic Experience Scale (Cotes)
DEVELOPING THE COVERT TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE SCALE (COTES): A RETROSPECTIVE EARLY PSYCHOSOCIAL TRAUMA ASSESSMENT TOOL by Tiffany E. Vastardis A Dissertation Submitted to the Faculty of The College of Education in Partial Fulfilment of the Requirements for the Degree of Doctor of Philosophy Florida Atlantic University Boca Raton, FL December 2019 Copyright 2019 by Tiffany E. Vastardis ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS The journey to the completion of this project was certainly not one that was treaded alone. Many individuals have contributed to this process, and the fostering of the personal growth, development, and fortitude necessary to accomplish this feat. I would like to take this opportunity to recognize those of who have served pivotal roles in this pursuit. First, I would like to acknowledge my family, Mom and T.J. Whether it is the case that we are as similar as three completely different people could possibly be, or that we are as different as three extremely similar people could possibly be; the reality remains that, no matter what, we have always stood together to bear the brunt of each storm that we have been forced to face. Things have not always been easy; however, I shall forever be proud of both of you, and grateful for how far that we have all come. In addition, I would also like to thank a more recent addition to our clutch, Michael, as your sustained encouragement and enthusiasm have served as guiding lights at times during which I began to question my aptitude and endurance. On the note of family, I would like to take a moment to recognize those who have proven that “the blood of the covenant” can, indeed, be “thicker than the water of the womb”, namely, The Barrs, The Perrys, and all of my loved ones in the Bahamas.