Sarah Newsletter
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sarahnewsletter number 9 october 1994 free!!! I know,I know,itts late, but things kept had read them. yourd know the answers. I happening,or not happening, itrs hard to il!'pose it's'these short attention spdns exp1ain... basically (to fall backon metaphor everybody'sgot these days.. So - I rl I try for a moment)it was as if hugegreat slabs of choppingthis one up into shorter paragraphs, rock kept suddenlymaterialising out of thin even break someparagraphs mid air to block our way across the mountaintop sentenceif that helDs, and throw in a few while evil black carrion birds swoopeddown pictures, mapsand pie-charts. low trying to peck out our eyes. - You really Anyway,HEAVET{LY; canrt imaginewhat itrs like sometimes.These fab London-basedlabels have it sq easy. ANDthey and their new get to go to parties and ridilon tirbe trains. A Pie-Chart LP whichi s called "TheDecline & Fall Anyway,never having been ones to let our of Heavenl,v"and spiri ts get daunted by hobgobli ns or foul not what we you 'I told fi ends and the l i ke, werre now ful l steam ect f imo hocarr<o ahead- a curiously appositechoice of words, frankly werre not to be trusted. And the actually, as a real live steam-trainhas just sleeve sports a njce photo of a kitten amid this second gone past the window (on the j onic col umns wearing a I aurel wreath and train-lines out the back, not downthe street) looking pensive. Wealso have35 negativesof - no, real I y, a STEAlt4TRAIN - Gt.lRI ogo on the the kitten NOTwearing jts laurel wreath and side, a dozenmaroon coaches rattling behind, NOTlooking pensive but thatrs kittens for smoke bi 11 owing up over the rooftops you, no senseof hjstory or drama. Somehrhere sometimes,you know, I feel like I've sturnbled maybe there exj sts a paralI e1 universe j n into somevast theme park in which Time and whichthi s i snrt the case and i n which kittens Geographyhave ceased to have any meaning. take all the leadingtheatrjcal roles andhold SARAHLAND,SARAHW0RLD, now therers an idea... down important jobs I ecturi ng on pre- groups of penuriousstudents paid to dress up industrial societjes at respectedpolytechnics in TRAlll{AYcostumes and amusesticky screaning but donrt let ne scare vou with mind-blowino children with songsand dances... I see that conceptslike that. ActJally though,speak'ir9 somethingcalled FURNITURELANDhas appeared up of the spookyworld of the meta-normal,those by the M5, Irm not sure if itrs a theme-park whorvelong suspectedthat HEAVETLYare not of or not, part of mereally canrt believe people earthly flesh and who find it impossibleto could ever be so daft as to oueuefor 2 hours beljeve that the peoplewho made"Atta Gjrl" just so as to get to spend5 minutessitting could possibly be subject to the samelaws of on a natural-look cane sofa or enjoying the physics, biology and turbary as the rest of warm sensuouspleasures of a nice deep shag us, shouldstudy closely the photoon the back pile but then - people are bloody gullible. of the LP, for here Ameliars occasional Weshould know. Othertimes, I fee'l like Irve transl ucence i s stri ki ng1y evident. Cathy, stumbled into somecinnamon-scented paradise meanwhile,is clearly distracted by the sudden wheretautly-nuscled eunuchsand scarcely-c1ad unexpectedreturn of the mother-shjD. handmaidensdust my feet hourly with icing sugar. I wonderif Irm going mad? Irll get The morehawk-eyed might also have spotted promising gloss-v to the HEAVEilLYdates in a minute, honest. our ads in NMEand MM a free poster jf you bo'rght the LP from the rjght First, speakingto someof you, which we sort of shop. This poster, rather thdn beinq occasionally canrt help doing, despite our yet one more exampleof our warmand generous i ncreasing l y poli shed attempts to di sguise nature (yes, not only can we toast muffjns ourselves as doorways or trivial items. of with our natural body-heat,werll butter them street-furniture, werve noticed that you for you too), was actually a marketinq-device mostly dontt actually read these things... featuring a rather lush black & white photoof becauseyou ask us questions to which, if you the band completel y naked, fol ded i nto The goodnews if you live in Chelmsfordis quarters or sixths if you bought the CD. And that you've one less day left to live than you i ntenti on wasnrt that i t should be a the had yesterday 1i mited, col I ectable thi ng, because anybody who orders from us, or complains, gets one And now, of course, HEAVEf{LYare in too; sad1y, however,our distributjon company America- it's too late to go printing dates, sent posters to many shops who werenrt the but we hopeyrall had a nice time, and will rjght sort at all, oh goodnessrne n0... s0 - have other nice times in years to come, even grrrrr, basically. Werll do our best. if y'all do wakeup one day to find your faces have melted as moral retribution for the sins you get eight newones, four of Song-wise, of your president; which reminds fi€, we from the last Peel themre-jigglings of things promisedHeavens to Betsy werd apologise for whichwe've been promised will be re- Session, commentslast time about them being wiliing in 0ctober... though Irll believe broadcast tools of the Bush/Reaganadrninistration, which I a turnip dance the two-step that when see we meantto be taken slightly tongue-in-cheek, as they say aroundthese parts. with a swede, but there you go. And Wiiija Recordsgot a Elsewhere,HEAVEIILY's crazy jnternationa'l bit bad-temperedand argumentative about being jet-setti ng I j festyl e continues to rankle and called bolshy, so apologiesto themtoo! amongthe poor and cause social disturbance The HEAtGilLYU.S. tour was organised by K, - we donrt care, just self-pitying but !g]Jg. who have released "The Decline & FalI" over ME''dridwith themfti? very had a fr-ee tri D to there. Supportwas from Lois, who is American jt you didnrt get a njce was too. Sorry (So oh, sue uS, sue us! ! ! but, more postcard, who you are. t,le ) but we dontt know interestingly, the L.A. Alligator Loungedate waterfall in the esoecially-Col6n recornmend the also featured our own latest love-children (you walk behind it, just Plaza de can ABERDEEII,whose singer Beth currently has was huge metaphorfor something), like it a purple hair, due to a bottle mix-up. Atocha station (which has a tropical rajn- forest in it)(just a small one)(thankyou - uABERDEEII,uyou cry indignantiy,."who are have one yourseif), and the AZCA office ABERDEEII?"t,lel1, basically, if yourve spent complex on the Paseo de I a CastelI ana' your entire life searching for the missing especially the PicassoTower. There are some link betweenTalulah Goshand New0rder, then museumsand galleries with old stuff in too, this js the bandfor you. You poor sad lonely "Byron", but we didn't bother with those, becausewerre fool you. the debut EP, cameout 0n young and built for The Future and because 0ctober 3rd, and they seem to be playing theyrre closed on Sundays. around town ouite a bit at the momentand generally becomingthe toast of LA (including played two concerts, both sold HEAVET{LY supporting B0YRACER,the crumpet of lletherby, weekendpassed in a happyblur of out, and the on their forthcomingU.S. tour...) so, if you Iots of heaving bodies, cameras,autographs, livfiEirby, don't be surprised. l'lervealso roomnot looking quite free drinks and a hotel managedto obtain (well, they posted it to us) at end of our stay as it had as shevelled the a rather wonderful cassette of them doing an what with the odd when we first arrived, acoustic version of BRIGHTERTs"HaIf-Hearted" - for this, we broken lamD and Djcture-frame live on KXLU- donrt knowwhat it stands for, must blame A Drummer,who denies everything, but it's a radio station in LA. And theyrre jncludes very existenceof but since that the now recording a NEl.lEP, for January release: the eveni ng of September1 6th, thj s doesn't "Fireworks", 'rWhenIt Doesntt Matter" and prove the hotel were honestly much. Luckily, "Super Sunny Summer",a title destined t0 just proper rock- happy to have had English rouse Steven t,lells to the usual purple-headed Flathew with stars staying, and let off signing fury but then he is rather pathetic, and itrs an autographfor the receptionistrs nephew. not like it's exactly a paeanto beachballs. goodnews if you live in Spain The other I said "BoYRACERU.S. tour", and therers a year be easier to is that from next it should mapover there to prove it; whatrs more, a 7" our records, thanks to a newdistribution buy featuring their version of "OneStep Forward" by the nice people from service being set-up is going to be on sale at all the gigs... or Recordsand Spiral Magazine(hello Elefant you can wflite to the usual EoYRCER address... Luis & Joaquiml) , who al so organised the concerts. l4etaphorically,we dredge their BOYRACERhave also just finished someU.K. toes with sherbetand suckgreedily. dates with The WeddingPresent - David Gedge l{ov lst 27th &t (Incidentally, we had a demo'last weekfrom a band who said they wanted t0 be on our rostrum. A rostrum i s something el se P3&drJloilb-oi:i#iA 0ct entirely, usually circular and about tvio feet IIEUYORK high, and we donrt haveone. Andwe wouldnrt tladronaHill tfinery Acne 5th ilov 29th oct I,ASHINGT0I'IDC 1et you on it if we did.