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C00KIEEE 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page ii Copyright © 1999, 2008 by Gregory J.P. Godek Cover and internal design © 2008 by Sourcebooks, Inc. Cover photo © Corbis Sourcebooks and the colophon are registered trademarks of Sourcebooks, Inc. 1001 Ways to be Romantic® is a federally registered trademark of Gregory J.P. Godek. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems—except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews—without permission in writing from its publisher, Sourcebooks, Inc. All brand names and product names used in this book are trademarks, registered trademarks, or trade names of their respective holders. Sourcebooks, Inc., is not associated with any product or ven- dor in this book. Care has been taken to ensure the information in this book was “Greg Godek should be accurate at the time of publication. Be nominated for the Nobel advised that addresses, phone numbers, and web addresses may change and that companies Peace Prize for teaching 1001 may go out of business or change products or services. Ways To Be Romantic.” Originally published in 1999 as 1001 Ways to —Boston Magazine be Romantic—Author’s Annotated Edition. This is a revised edition. Published by Sourcebooks Casablanca, an imprint of Sourcebooks, Inc. P.O. Box 4410, Naperville, Illinois 60567–4410 (630) 961–3900 Fax: (630) 961–2168 www.sourcebooks.com ISBN-13: 978-1-4022-1004-4 ISBN-10: 1–4022-1004-3 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data: Godek, Gregory J.P. 1001 Ways to be Romantic/Gregory J.P. Godek— Authors Annotated Edition p. cm. “The book is a well- ISBN: 1-57071-481-9 (pbk: alk. Paper) 1. Courtship Miscellanea. 2. Dating (Social customs) thumbed romantic Bible Miscellanea. 3. Love Miscellanea. I. Title that I consult often.” HQ801.G554 1999 646.4’7—dc21 99-36946 CIP —B. Wicker, Reader Printed and bound in Canada TR 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page iii Dedications • To the romantics—who simply want more. • To the cynics (the romantics of tomorrow). • To those who want to fall in love again. • To those who want to save romance from the scientists and psycholo- Dedication Page gists—and put it back into the hands Theme Song: of the poets and dreamers and lovers. “[This One Goes Out To] the One I Love,” • To my son, the future author, R.E.M. Thomas Valentine Godek. • And to my bride, my best friend, my soul mate, Karyn Lynn Godek…(Who is more fun than you and me? Nobody.) “I like your book 1001 Ways To Be Romantic! It will fill your brain with all kinds of wonderful romantic ideas. I like number 584!” —Oprah Winfrey 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page iv Also by Greg Godek • 10,000 Ways to Say I Love You • Love Coupons • I Love You Coupons • Romantic Questions: 264 Outrageous, Sweet and Profound Questions • Your Relationship Report Card “These books are worth memorizing.” —Boston Herald Theme Song: “Paperback Writer,” The Beatles 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page v Acknowledgments • Deborah Werksman • Bruce Jones • Kate Broughton • Dale Koppel • Mary Ann Sabia Acknowledgments ary-Lynne Bohn • M Page Theme Song: • Bonnie Robak “Thank You,” • John & Jean Christina Aguilera • Warren & Judy • Steven Jobs • Lou Rizzo & UPS • Sam & The Group • Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart “1001 Ways To Be Romantic. That seems like an awful lot! I mean, guys, if the first thousand ideas don’t work—what are the chances she’s going to stick around when you say, ‘Okay, just one more’?!” —Jay Leno, The Tonight Show 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page vi Contents Introduction..........................1 I Do ..................................35 Once Upon a Time ................4 Do’s & Don’ts ......................37 They Lived Happily Don’ts & Do’s ......................39 Ever After ..........................5 Do ....................................41 Don’t ................................42 Little Things Mean a Lot ..........7 Bigger Is Better ......................8 You Must Remember This ......43 A Kiss Is Just a Kiss ..............45 Creative Gifts ........................9 A Sigh Is Just a Sigh ..............47 Creative Gestures ..................10 The Fundamental Things Romance on a Budget.............12 Apply..............................48 Spare No Expense..................13 As Time Goes By ..................50 The Most Important Things (Play It Again, Sam) ..............51 I’ve Learned in Twenty Love Notes (I)......................52 Years of Teaching Romance....14 Love Notes (II)......................53 The Ten Commandments Freshman Lessons..................55 for Loving Couples..............15 Sophomore Lessons ..............56 Left-Brained* ........................16 Junior Lessons ......................57 Right-Brained* ....................17 Senior Lessons......................58 Romance for Dummies ............19 Le Boudoir............................59 Romance for Smarties ............20 La Cuisine............................61 What’s Your Romantic “Style”? Love Notes (III)....................62 (Men) ..............................21 Love Notes (IV) ....................63 What’s Your Romantic “Style”? “I Love You” ........................64 (Women) ........................22 “Ai Shite Imasu” ....................66 Flowers ..............................23 Be Creative..........................67 Chocolate............................24 Be Prepared ..........................68 Jewelry ................................26 Perfume..............................27 Always, Always, Always ..............70 Champagne..........................29 Never, Never, Never................72 Lingerie..............................30 Gifts, Gifts, Gifts ..................73 Sex, Sex, Sex........................74 It’s Not What You Do—............31 —But How You Do It................33 Love Notes (V)......................76 Love Notes (VI)......................77 To Do................................34 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page vii Lovesick..............................78 A Month of Romance: Prescriptions for Love ............79 Week 4............................117 Help for the Hopeless............80 The Golden Rules Hope for the Helpless ............82 of Romance........................118 Travel Tips ..........................83 Rules Were Made to A Suitcase Full of Romance ....84 Be Broken........................119 Fun & Games ......................85 Be My Valentine!..................121 Weird & Wacky ....................86 Kiss Me, You Fool! ..............122 Cats & Dogs ........................87 The Mathematics Satin & Lace ........................89 of Romance ....................123 The Calculus of Love............125 Strategies & Examples ............90 Bed & Breakfasts ..................92 Couplehood ......................127 Parenthood ........................129 Gifts & Presents....................94 Presents & Gifts....................96 Erotica..............................130 Exotica ..............................131 Daily & Weekly ....................97 Monthly & Yearly..................98 Creating an A+ Relationship ..132 The Relationship Yin & Yang ........................99 Report Card ....................135 Yang & Yin........................100 Common Sense ..................137 Mozart ..............................101 Uncommon Sense ................138 Elvis ................................102 It’s the Thought That Counts ....139 Lame Excuses (#’s 1-4)..........104 Actions Speak Louder Than Lame Excuses (#’s 5-8) ........105 Words ............................141 Lame Excuses (#’s 9-12) ........106 Lame Excuses (#’s 13-14) ......107 S.W.A.K. ..........................142 G.M.F.L. ..........................143 For Men Only ....................108 Can’t Buy Me Love................144 For Women Only ................109 I Want to Hold Your Hand ....146 For Singles Only..................110 Help!................................147 For Marrieds Only ................111 All You Need Is Love............148 A Month of Romance: At Home ..........................150 Week 1 ............................113 At Work ............................151 A Month of Romance: Sweet Stuff ........................152 Week 2............................114 Kid Stuff ..........................153 A Month of Romance: Funny Stuff........................154 Week 3............................116 Cool Stuff..........................155 1001Ways.int 1st half NEW 10/9/07 4:55 PM Page viii Dirty Stuff..........................157 Slightly Outrageous..............196 Sex!......................................158 Quite Outrageous..................197 Surprise!..............................159 Slightly Naughty ..................198 Celebrate! ..........................160 Quite Naughty ....................200 Outrageous!........................162 Shopping for Dummies ........201 Passionate!..........................163 Advanced Shopping Games People Play ..............164 Strategies........................202 Games Lovers Play ..............165 Words of Love/ Off the Wall........................166 Shakespeare’s ..................204 On the Wall........................167 Words of Love/Poetic............206 Words of Love/Your Words......207 The Myths of Romance (I) ......168 Words of Love/ The Myths of Romance (II)....169 the Ancients ..................209 Men Are from Mars ............170 Memorize This List..............210 Women Are