The Cord Weekly

The Cord WeeklyThe tie that binds since 1926 BIG LEAGUE HAWKS AFGHAN ACTION CO-OPPORTUNITY WLU's football stars drafted to Experts congregate at WLU to Five different dream jobs, all at

the CFL ... PAGE ... 8 discuss Afghan role ... PAGE 6 your choosing PAGES 10-11 * I Volume 48 Issue 1 WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 www.cordweekly.com World's smartest city Waterloo was recently recognized by the Intelligent Community Forum as the world-leader in the use of broadband technology, taking the title in their second year as one of the top seven

Vlasov's body found

Body discovered in Grand River

MIKE BROWN EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

The mysterious disappearance of first-year Laurier student Nick Vla- sovhas come to a tragic conclusion, as his body was found in the Grand River shortly after 2:30 pm on Sat- urday, April 21. According to Olaf Heinzel, Public Affairs Coordinator for the Water- loo Regional Police, Vlasov's death was consistent with the effects of Photos of Sydney Helland drowning.

WE ARE SO SMART. S-M-R-T - Clockwise from top: Perimeter Institute, UW's Dana Porter Library, CIGI, and Research in Motion. "We are not treating it as a suspi- cious death in the sense that we do not believe foul play was a factor in link between the community and his LAURA CARLSON ongoing leadership and collabora- death," he said. NEWS EDITOR 8.5 sq km tion," said Farbrother. the educational institutions," said Police were called to the scene Brenda Halloran, mayor of Wa- Farbrother. "It's not just about when a local woman and her hus- that the theme IFC put learning, it's the co-op programs band stumbled across the body of "Intelligent" may not be the first Total broadband terloo, felt forth this year, which revolved and the partnership work." the Mississauga teen - who disap- word that springs to mind when a COVERAGE leadership and innova- Steve Farlow, the executive di- peared just weeks prior to his twen- Laurier student searches for a way around the of it," tion, also had a factor inWaterloo's rector of Laurier's Schlegel Cen- tieth birthday - while canoeing a to describe the home of their uni- nology and importance "We connected to exactly stretch of the river approximately versity. But an international think said Louis Zacharilla, co-founder success. what were looking for in a one kilometer upstream from the tank based out of New York seems and director of development at they community," said Halloran. -10,957 Freeport Bridge in Kitchener. to think that "intelligent" is the IFC. Zacharilla explains that IFC With Waterloo being the home "Some trees had slid down the perfect way torefer to our dear city Post-secondary at a city's tech- of world-renowned companies embankment and were in the rivet, ofWaterloo. does not just look factor, but as Research in Motion(RIM), YEAR and he was caught in the trees," ex- . After making the list of the top nology as an isolated such DEGREES LAST be- the Perimeter Institute ofTheoreti- plained the canoeist, who preferred seven intelligent communities last analyzes the "relationship cal Physics, the Center for Inter- to remain nameless. year, the Intelligent Community tween broadband communication and their on national Governance Innovation ter and a former member of the "His body was in excellent con- Forum (IFC) has declared Water- technologies impact de- (CIGI), Open Text and DALSA, it Intelligent Waterloo Committee, dition," she added. "I knew that he loo the smartest city in the world economic development, social and seems hard for anyone to be un- has seen first hand the extreme was missing and ... the minute we for 2007. IFC gives out the award velopment, job growth other sustainability clear as to where the city's "buzz" collaborationbetween the univer- saw him, I knew who it was. I didn't based on statistical data that ana- factors that relate to is coming from. sities and businesses within the have to get an ID from the police or lyzes how well a given community of communities." And when 30 percent of Water- community. anything." uses broadband technology. Simon Farbrother, chair of the Intelligent Waterloo Committee, loo's population attends one of the Farlow is optimistic about the The body was sent to Hamilton feels that this year the city was fi- city's three centres for post-sec- benefits this award will bring to for a post-mortem examination, 115,000 nally rewarded for the "continuing ondary education, the fundamen- both the city and the universities and the positive identification fol- journey" that began over two years tal role ofWilfrid Laurier Universi- in particular. "That [Intelligent lowed that Tuesday morning, an ofWaterloo(UW) that will unwelcome six weeks of Population ago when the committee was first ty, the University City] brand, award, help ending to formed. and Conestoga College cannot be us attract top students who are anxiety for Vlasov's friends, family, year's award] was denied. driven to innovation," saidFarlow. and theWLU community. Waterloo, every sector of the "I think [this "In universities and the a consequence of taking a very "The two - the academic, the community are absolutely instrumen- SEE WATERLOO, PAGE 2 SEE VLASOV, PAGE 4 governmental, strong foundation and building on college technological, the there is a strong really demonstrating our tal because I think the businesses - have all seen tech- that and 2 News WEDNESDAY MAY 30, 2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY

The Cord Weekly - The tiethat binds since 1926 ~

phone: (519) 884-1970 ext. 3564 fax: (519) 883-0873 WLU continues expansion email: [email protected] The Cord Weekly 75 University Avenue West New $5 million Career Development and Co-op Building to open in September Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3C5 WEDNESDAY MAY 30, 2007 VOLUME 48 ISSUE 1

Next Issue: June 27

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

"At some point, Laura had to take off her

pants in my room - and then leave without pants." - Some drunken miscreant, aka. Student Life Editor Ashley Jang, after a particularly debaucherous Saturday night

WORD OF THE WEEK

Homeslice - A close friendwhosesudden appearance elicits joy.

CONTRIBUTORS

JeremyCarnegie Carrie McNabb Brian Weadick

Ashley Doodnauth - Don Morgenson Esther Wheaton BlairForsyth-Stark Wendy Nind Tyler White Krystian Imgrum Mallory O'Brien Mike Whitehouse Jon Kit Kari Pritchard Mya Wijbenga Mike Kitchen April Robinson Nicole Wray AllieMaxted Riley Taylor Dawn Zambonini

WLUSP STAFF

Copy Editing Manager Caitlin Henderson Copy Editors Ariel Kroon IT Manager Brian Willey Distribution Manager NicoJe Laouataris

WLUSP ADMINISTRATION

President Keren Gottfried VP: Advertising Angela Foster VP: Brantford Dan Sche|| Chair of the Board Colin LeFevre vlce Chal ' Rafuq Andani Board of Directors Ryan Clubb Rachel Crawford Sydney Helland

ADVERTISING TOOL TIME! - Construction of the new Career Development Center and Co-op building is underway at the corner of King and Lodge Street.

All advertising inquiries should be directed to VP: Advertising Angela Foster at 884-0710, ext. 3560 or [email protected] LAURA CARLSON that can hold up to 75 people when vating the existing space, the uni- Dr. Alvin Woods Building (DAWB), NEWS EDITOR theretractable wall is removed. versity decided to construct a new as well as a 9000 square-foot addi- COLOPHON Career Services will also change building, as the estimates for ex- tion to Alumni Hall - faculty and

The Cord Weekly is the official student newspaper of As one looks to the corner ofKing its name to the Career Develop- tensive reconstruction were very students currently using the 232 the WilfridLaurier University community. and Lodge, it's hard to believe that ment Center when the building costly. King St. building are experiencing

Started in 1926 as the College Cord, The Cord Weekly is an in just three months a brand new opens in September to better com- "Why not take that opportunity very littleinconvenience. editorially independent newspaper published by Wilfrid Laurier University Student Publications, Waterloo, a $5 million Career Development municate what the department of- to construct a building that will "It's minimal impact on any- corporation without share capital. WLUSP is governed by its board of directors. Center and Co-op building will fers, according to Jan Basso, direc- be more acceptable for the longer body. Compared to the DAWB it's be complete. Though only a gen- tor of Co-op and Career Services. term?" reasoned Ron Dupuis, vice the two extremes," said Butler. wlujgy eral framework appears to be in The university undertook this president of physical resources, Aside from being gratefulfor the 3gãpybNcjUom; place, the three-story building is project afterreceiving several com- when the issue was raised with the very smooth transition that Co-op Opinions expressed within 7he Cord are those of the author and scheduled to be open for the cur- plaints from employers regarding university about two years ago. and Career Services is expected to do not necessarily reflect those of the Editorial Board, The Cord, WLUSP, WLU or Can WebPrinting Inc. rent 950 Laurier co-op students in the current Co-op and Career Ser- The $5 million needed to fund have, Basso is thrilled about the All content appearing in The Cord bears the copyright expressly September. located of their creators) and may not be used without written vices building at 232 King the building comes from the newbuilding's prime location. She consent The infrastructure plan of the Street. university's operating budget, as hopes that the strong presence of The Cord is created using Macintosh computers running OS X.2 using Adobe Creative Suite 2 (InDesign, Photoshop, Acrobat, building includes 24 interview "We find employers complain- well as some significant dona- the newly-acquired space will en- Distiller and Illustrator). Canon Rebel XT 8.0 megapixel digital cameras are used forprincipal photography. rooms, a large employer lounge, ing about the space and not nec- tionsfrom external employers. Jim courage more students to come in The Cord Weeklyis a proud member of the a reception room for either work- essarily wanting to come here to Buder, vice president of financial and use thefacility. Ontario Press Council since 2006. T) Any unsatisfied complaints can be sent shops or Accessible Learning test do interviews," said Basso. "We're resources, explained that "the pri- "I think it's really a positive to theCouncil at [email protected]. writing and a Center for Research very much hoping that with the ority [placed on a project] in part step," said Basso. "It really speaks The Cord's circulation for a normal Wednesday issue is 7,000 copies and enjoys a readership of over 10,000. Innovation and Career Develop- new facilities we'll be able to bring comes from the donor." to the value that Laurier puts on Cord subscription rates are $20.00 per term foraddresses within ment. The two level floors more particularly Canada. upper employers here, Compared with the many con- the department of Co-op and Ca- will both be with for the she The Cord Weeklyis a proud member equipped large interviewing process," struction projects in progress all reer Services." (CUP), of the Canadian University Press %| V centers, - since 2004. resource computer labs added. over campus including renova- for student use and lecture rooms After initially looking into reno- tions to UniversityStadiumand the Campus Plus is The Cord's national advertising agency.

Preamble to The Cord Constitution

The Cord will keep faith withitsreaders by presenting news and expressions of opinions comprehensively, accuratelyand fairly. Laurier offers 'balanced community' The Cord believes in a balanced and impartial presentation of all relevant facts in a news report, and ofall substantialopinions in a matter ofcontroversy. - FROM WATERLOO, COVER raise our voices and tell them how Mayor Halloran is hoping to see The staff of The Cord shall uphold all commonly held ethical conventions of journalism When an error of omission or of successful we are," said Hayter. visits from more internationaldel- Past Winners commission has occurred, that error shall be acknowledged promptly. Scott Hayter, assistant vice pres- "It's a balanced community, egates and businesses starting up When statementsare made that are critical ofan individual, or ident of university development particularly on the education sec- in the area, and a higher retention • 2006: Taipei, Taiwan an organization, we shall give those affected the opportunity to reply at the earliesttime possible. and WLU's representative on the tor and that's where Laurier really rate of graduates from the local • 2005: Mitaka, Japan

" Ethical journalism requires impartiality, and consequently Intelligent Waterloo committee, comes to he said. "You universities. And • conflicts of interest and the appearance of conflicts of interest the floor, as excited as she 2003-04: Glasgow, willbe avoided by all staff. noted that while UW may be larger can't have all these smart geeks, is about thefuture Halloran seems Scotland The only limits ofany newspaper are those of theworld around and • & it, and so The Cord will attempt tocover its world with a special more involved in the develop- you've got to have the geeks that to still be celebrating in this great 2002: Calgary, Alberta focus on Wilfrid Laurier University, and the community of Kitchener-Waterloo, and with a special ear to the concerns ment of new technologies, Laurier provide a bit of culture," Hayter accomplishment. Seoul, South Korea of the students of Wdfrid Laurier University. Ultimately, The Cord will be bound by neither philosophy, nor geography in still plays a critical role in the suc- added with a chuckle. "Winning this award is such a • 2001: New York City, New its mandate. cess of the region. Although the protocol seems to prestigious acknowledgement of York The Cord has an obligation to foster freedom of the press and freedom of speech. This obligation is best fulfilled when debate "We're not as big as UW, but so be that after winning the award what we're doing right and shows • 2000: LaGrange, Georgia and dissent are encouraged, both in the internal workingsof the paper, and through The Cord's contact with the studentbody. what, because we contribute a lot once you don't apply again, Wa- that the world wants to get on • 1999: Singapore The Cord will always attempt to do what is right, with fear of to this community and it's impor- terloo is to remain in the board with us. How cool neither repercussions, nor retaliation. The purpose of the expected is that?" student press is to act as an agent of social awareness, and so tant that we the rafters and some time. shall conduct theaffairs of our newspaper. sing to limelight for quite The Cord Weekly ■ Wednesday may 30,2007 News. 3

VOCAL CORD ternational students. communications technologies. Dr. Bob Rosehart, president of Rosehart wonders where research What do you do for Wilfrid Laurier University, is gen- in disciplines such as religion, mu- PM opens erally optimistic about this "long sic, and history fit within this plan. fun in Waterloo over awaited" announcement. How- Paul Maxim, associate VP: Re- ever, Rosehart does have concerns search, feels thatLaurier is evolv- the summer? with the government possibly lim- ing into a much more comprehen- itingresearch that isn't necessarily sive and research-active univer- the vault S&T related. sity, and that the plan put forward "I think it's good toidentify some by the government will have a very Feds to invest $9.2 billion in science and tech national priorities, but on the oth- positive effect on our dynamic er hand [the government] should community. LAURA CARLSON fund the research side and direct be cautioned that they don't try to "I think, given a chance, strate- NEWS EDITOR income support for students," said tiebasic research to only [S&T] ar- gies oudined from this position Harper. eas," said Rosehart. paper and in this document will On May 17, Stephen Harper chose Specifically, Canadian universi- Specifically the government has have beneficial effects across the the PerimeterInstitutefor Theoret- ties are expected to see an increase identified four key areas to focus board," said Maxim. "In some "I like going to the Starlight and ical Physics in Waterloo as the site in the number of scholarships and research on: environmental S&T, ways, this was one of the most hanging out at JaneBond." to announce a $9.2 billion invest- internships available for students natural resources and energy, comprehensive strategies that I've ment by the federal government in in S&T related fields, as well as health and related life science and seen."

- Roxy Riess Canada's science and technology available incentives for skilled in- technology, and information and Third-year Communications/ (S&T) industry. Global Studies This strategy to advance S&T growth is in accordance with the government's 2006 Advantage Canada economic plan, which aims to make Canada a world leader in the global market. "In today's world, a scientific and technological innovation is fundamental to economic and social progress of all kinds," Harper told those gathered at the Perim- "Sports: baseball, hockey, tennis, golf. eter Institute. I'm athletic." "We're lagging behind our com- petitors in the next generation of

- Neil Parker scientists and engineers." Masters of Business Administration With the enrollment of math- ematics and computer science students dropping 13 percent between 2000 and 2005, the Con- servative government has serious aims to increase the number of engineers, graduate students and S&T students at both the graduate and undergrad levels. "Recognizing of course that education itself is obviously primar- ily a provincial jurisdiction, our Tyler White

activities as a federal government BEARERS OF GOOD NEWS - RIM founder and CEO Mike Laziridis, Minister of Industry Maxime Bernier with friends. We "Hanging out my are largely focused on trying to and Prime Minister Stephen Harper at the Perimiter Institute in Waterloo. went to the park for a barbeque."

- Dong Lim Third-year Economics/ Global Studies Masters in integrativebiology

DAN POLISCHUK As obscure as something like NEWS EDITOR this may seem, Szabo feels that there should not be any problem Having received approval at the with reaching their goal of hav- beginning of April from the On- ing 20 students enrolled for the tario Council in Graduate Stud- two-year program within the next ies (OCGS), Laurier is now in the couple ofyears. "I like going to the Starlight and Jane process of admitting students for This expectation is supported Bond. I also go to Waterloo Park." its brand new Master of Science by Joan Norris, dean of graduate degree in integrative biology. studies at the school. Besides Lau- the - Stefan Sereda Sights are set to accept six indi- rier graduates, new program English Grad Studies viduals out of a pool of 12 appli- has peaked the interest of students cants to kick off the new program from the University of Waterloo,

this September - something that University of Guelph and the Uni- only fuels the high level of eager- versity of Saskatchewan. ness of Dr. Arthur Szabo, dean of To fund such an academic en- science at WLU. deavour, Norris explained that "We're really pleased with this students are guaranteed at least because [the program] will attract $12,000 for their studies with op- high quality graduate students," portunities provided to them said Szabo, adding, "It should through T.A.-ships and scholar- enable our research activities in ships. the biology department to really Norris added that this particular thrive." field was chosen because it was "I play on the MLSB baseball team, it's For those who are not intimately something the heads ofthe depart- awesome. There are a lot of keg parties familiar with integrative biology, ment felt really passionate about. and get to be outside all day." I Szabo describes the "niche for "Because of the nature of the graduate studies in biology" as department and the interest that - Melissa Abercromby science rooted in 'organismal bi- they have in their knowledge of Masters of Business Administration ology.' In short, one learns to un- this emerging way of dealing with derstand organisms while moving biological problems, they felt that Riley Taylor Compiled by Laura Carlson, more towards a molecular biology this was the direction to go," she STEADY HANDS - A biology student carefully mixes chemicals. photos by Riley Taylor approach. explained. WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY 4 .News CANADA INBRIEF Canoeists discover body Western newspaper Laurier computer science and math student found on banks of the Grand River amon§st forestation loses its free voice

London, ON The University of Western On- tario's student newspaper The Gazette lost its independence over a controversial spoof issue released on April Fool's Day. One article in particular was said to trivialize rape and ridicule feminism. University administration now has the power to withhold student fees from the publication and prevent the paper's distribution on campus if they find any material contained within its pages inappropriate. This decision by the Board of Directors makes Western's newspapers one of the only student publications in Canada to have their distribution and funding subjected to the influence of administration.

U of M butts out

Winnipeg, MB Effective April 2, the University of Manitoba has become a completely smoke-free school. The newly-implemented policy placed a ban against smoking anywhere on the university's property. This forces individuals Google Maps to travel to the public sidewalk before lighting up. TRAGEDY - After leaving Little House residence on Laurier's campus for either his friend's house on Fir Street or the 7/11, Nick Vlasov's whereabouts were unknown for over a month until his body was finally discovered in Kitchener, 15.5 km from his discarded backpack. Laurier is considering imple- menting a similar policy, but the audits and compliance commit-

- FROM VLASOV, COVER on Fir St., while others thought he his backpack and body were found mind for math. tee must first approve the mo- was bound for the 7/11 at the cor- is approximately 15.5 km. "His passing away has definitely tion before it is presented to the Vlasov, a first-year computer ner of King Street and University Between Vlasov's disappear- brought all of us closer together Board of Governors. However, science and math student, went Avenue. ance and the discovery of his body, and has helped us to value the Dr. Rosehart, president of WLU, missing from his Little House He was reported missing to po- Waterloo Regional Police con- time spent with those we love," feels that without strong enforce- residence around 11:30 pm on lice on Wednesday, March 7, and ducted numerous canine-assisted said long-time friend and second- ment, smoking policies such as the evening of Monday, March 5, a backpack containing some of his searches of the river, even bring- year psychology and English ma- a campus ban or the current lO- shortly after an intramural soccer clothes and books was found along ing in dive teams from Niagara re- jor, Alana Vieira. meter rule are not necessarily game and a floor meeting. Friends the banks of theriver the next day, gion, explained Heinzel. But these Vlasov was buried at St. Volody- effective. "We've tried a whole said he'd been his usual joking self near Bridge and Lancaster streets. yielded noresults, in part owing to myr Cultural Centre in Oakville bunch of different schemes, but just prior to his disappearance. According to a spokesperson how far downriver Vlasov's body on Friday, April 27, with approxi- I don't thinkwe're winning," said From there, Vlasov told some for the Grand River Conservation had traveled. mately 200-300 visitors attending Rosehart. friends and residence mates that Authority, the winding stretch of Friends described Vlasov as the funeral. he was headed to a friend's house river the between location where an avid chess player, with a sharp $210 million gift for BAG O'CRIME A WLUSU official reported a THEFT UNDER $5000 May 26 and early morning May universities possible theft. The matter is still REPORTED: 9:2OPM 27 person(s) unknown broke THEFT UNDER $5000 under investigation by Special MAY 26/07 into several PP&P vans parked Ontario REPORTED: 12:37 AM Constables. Footpatrol reported that two at 81 Lodge Stand stole various In March, Ontario universities MAY 21 /07 vending machines on the third tools from the vans. Total value of saw a commitment of $210 mil- While on patrol a Special Con- MVC HIT & RUN floor of the Nichols Centre had the tools taken is approximately lion from the government to help stable found a vending machine REPORTED: 2:OOPM been moved and broken into. In- $30,000. It appears that those re- post-secondary facilities across at a residence had been broken MAY 23 /07 vestigation revealed that the coin sponsible also attempted to steal the province deal with cost pres- into. The coin box was empty. A A student reported that her car boxes had been removed. Special one of the vans as it had the igni- sures of operating higher learn- wrench was found on the top of was struck by another vehicle Constables and Regional Police tion punched out and had been ing institutes. and has the machine been turned while parked in lot 3A. Damage Forensic Identification Unit was moved. Regional Police Foren- A one-timelump sum was dis- the in to Regional Police Forensic was minor. A Special Constable called in to check for fingerprints. sic Identification was called to tributed to various universities Identification suspects. attended and Unit. No a MVC report was Investigation continues. check for evidence. Investigation that can be used for capital, qual- submittedto Police. Regional continuing. ity or growth. WilfridLaurier was THEFT FROM VEHICLE PROPERTY DAMAGE one of the universities to be ap- REPORTED: B:47AM STOLEN GOODS REPORTED: 3:29AM If you have any information re- proved for funding and received REPORTED: 12:35 MAY 21 /07 AM MAY 27/07 garding these or any other in- $5.6 million. A guest at the King St. Residence MAY 26/07 While on patrol a Special Con- cidents please call Community reported that sometime during Regional Police contacted Com- stable found a window at the rear & Safety Security at 519-885-3333 - Compiled byLaura Carlson the the & night someone damaged munity Safety Security to advise of 232 King had been damaged. or Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222- lock on his vehicle while it was had they arrested a male at the No entry was gained. PP&P were TIPS. You can also report a crime in the garage and of & parked had corner Albert St. University called to makerepairs. electronically through the Com- car. It Ave. and gone through the appears charged him with pos- munity Safety & Security website. Log onto the Cord's website that nothing was stolen. session of stolen property when THEFT OVER $5000 he was caught with a WLU park- REPORTED: B:O3AM The Bag O' Crime is submitted forbreaking news THEFT UNDER $5000 ing sign. MAY 27/07 weekly by Community Safety and REPORTED: APR 26 /07 Sometime between late night Security. www.cordweekly.com The Cord Weekly ■ Wednesday may 30,2007 News. 5

program planning of this MBA NEWS INBRIEF will give students the problem Laurier to solving and critical thinking skills 2006-2007 Student conference in Ottawa, where del- to survive in the buisness world. egates have had the chance to meet This includes the development of Life Levy Projects with people such as Belinda Stron- three new courses, which focus on ach and Stephen Harper in the past, offer things such as leadership and cre- to voice issues that these political unique as well as to can ativity, plans bring in The Wilfrid Laurier University figures then address because of speakers from local buisnesses. Students Union (WLUSU) has their positions of power. Dybenko is confident that this recently announced the Student McNiven explained that CASA's rigorous combinationofacademic Life Levy projects from the fees goal is "focusing on post-secondary MBA degree skills and a more informal work- collected during the 2006-2007 education and lobbying for accessi- shop-type environment will pre- academic year. bility and affordability. WLU to offer the nation's first pare students for what is to come WLUSU receives almost "The fee for the whole year is in their professional careers. $700,000 from Student Life Levy $46,000, which is not an additional entrepreneurial masters degree program "This provides it all in one pack- funding, which is divided be- student fee since it comes out of the age because you get to come out tween the Waterloo and Brant- WLUSU budget," she said. LAURA CARLSON on how well the start up process with your MBA and you come ford campuses proportionate to McNiven was excited to explain NEWS EDITOR goes. out with a brand new business the number of students enrolled. that CASA will benefit Laurier's stu- "It's a very different environ- all set up and ready to go," said Projects at the Waterloo cam- dents, as itis the "only group thathas September will see the launch of ment that we're preparing our stu- Dybenko. pus include computer lab up- been able to meet with three prime a brand new one-year entrepre- dents for than a typical academic The program is still pending grades, an accessible learning ministers. CASA looks at prob- neurial MBA program at Laurier, environment offers," said Ginny approval from the Ontario Coun- accommodation bursary, an lems and develops a solution and which is thefirst of its kind in Can- Dybenko, dean of business and cil of Graduate Studies (OCGS), audio system for the Athletic works cooperatively with people in ada. Laurier is planning on open- but Dybenko Complex, video equipment for power." ing its doors to between 10 and 15 "We feel like we've built a lot of is expecting to the Theatre Auditorium and the students who are looking to get a see that happen Maureen Forrester Recital Hall, EXPERTISE business education that includes IN THE PARTICULAR AREA "momentarily." as well as a project enhancing 'Peeping Tom' busted a more hands-onapproach. SO IT ONLY MAKES SENSE THAT WE Although other Laurier's wireless network. "The program is designed post-second- Each year at WLU, full-time Wieslaw Mozdzen, a 45-year-old WILL CAPITALIZE ON THAT." for people who either want to ary institutions students pay $38.04per semester man residing in Kitchener, has start their own business or work are expected to towards the Student Life Levy. pleaded guilty to voyeurism and within the young firms that have - Peter Carayannopoulos, MBA director follow suit and Part-time students are required prowling at night. Mozdzen will be just started up and are entrepre- at Laurier develop similar to pay $9.51 per 0.5 credits. sentenced in Kitchener's Ontario neurial in nature," said Peter Ca- programs, Dy- Court on September 28, 2007, but rayannopoulos, MBA director at benko feels that must undergo a psychiatric assess- Laurier. economics at Laurier. the vibrant community of Water- University enrolment ment before being sentenced. "We feel like we've built a lot of Steve Farlow, executive direc- loo will contribute to the success Last December, Mozdzen was expertise in the particular area so tor of the Schlegel Center, echoes of the new program. expected to increase found coming down a fire escape in it only makes sense that we will Dybenko's thoughts. "Histori- "When you have such a hotbed a student house on Noecker Street capitalize on that," he added. cally, [entrepreneurial compa- of innovation and entrepreneur- Despite the fact that the number and his footprints in the snow led to According to Carayannopoulos, nies] haven't been able to turn to ship in the community, it's only of 18to 21 year-old Canadian citi- other locations on Noecker and El- the most unique part of the pro- business schools for graduates natural that that be reflected in zens will begin declining in 2012, gin Street. gram is that students are actually which have skills which are really the [educational] institutions as the Association of Universities Brad Dempster, Mozdzen's law- given course credit for developing relevant to them." well." and Colleges of Canada (AUCC) yer, is trying to arrange a condi- their business and will be graded And Dybenko feels that the predicts university enrolment tional discharge so Mozdzen can will increase by up to 150,000 continue with his job in the United students nationally in the next States. This decision will be based decade, due to an understand- on a psychiatric assessment to make Union buys BlackBerrys ing that Canada's future labour sure Mozdzen has no issues, espe- market requires an educated and cially of a sexual nature. skilled workforce. Student leaders aim to increase availability with new wireless devices The AUCC noted thatthe number of Canadian jobsfor degree- No leads in King St. fire DAN POLISCHUK lison] and with Management that holders has doubled from 1.9 NEWS EDITOR it would increase productivity and Cord/Online million to 3.8 million since 1990. No culprit has been found in the reliability." But Park also admitted > cordweekly.com Ihe increase in students will test King Street residence fire that oc- With the transition into the tenure that the decision raised some eye- >News the ability of a university to add curred in the sixth floor lounge on of anewWLUSU president already brows with some of the directors students to existing physical and March 31, 2007. Chris Dodd, man- underway, Dan Allison's vision initially, regarding whether it was Exams stolen human resources. On the other ager of housing services and resi- has started to take shape - and really a necessary expense. Film class has final hand, the increased enrolment dence life, says there is an "ongoing some that apparendy means hooking up "The question that it really exams stolen in a break- will be unequal, meaning investigation by the regional police his staff 24 hours a came down to with a lot of board post-secondary institutions are and Safety and Security at Laurier." day. and-enter. This will basically be the re- members was, 'Was [the decision] expected to face lower enrolment By Dan Polischuk sult of the decision to purchase prudent?"' explained Park. rates because of the general de- - Compiled by Nicole Wray five new Blackßerry devices for "I think the people that look at cameras cline in the youth population. himself and four other Manage- it throw the balance by asking 'are New AUCC researchers have noted ment members. While the goal they justtoys and, ifso, how much Laurier installs 15 new that higher participation rates is to increase availability to stu- money do students actually have cameras to increase cause even low-level jobs to re- dents, other committee members to pay for toys?"' campus security. quire a university degree. Sta- and individuals within the local Having already purchased the By Mike Brown tistics Canada agrees and even community, Allison joked that Blackberries under a $90 per claims that we may be over- the technology (new to WLUSU) month plan for each of the users Campus break-in educating many Canadians by could very well become a thorn in as part of the interim budget, Alli- encouraging everyone to go to Laurier his side. son explained that everything will A Tim Horton's university. 9 Complete 30-Hour Seminars "It's a blessing and a curse all be reevaluated in August when becomes crime scene 112 Proven Test-Taking Strategies at the same time," he said with a the operational budget for the up- after a break-and-enter. slight chuckle. coming year will be worked out. April Robinson WLUSU becomes full * Personalized Professional Instruction

Explaining in more detail, Al- * Comprehensive Study Materials up decision as member of CASA lison backed his * Simulated Practice Exams having performed a thorough de- Join the Cord'sAction News team! * Free Repeat Policy liberation - in his mind. OnApril 23,2007, theWilfrid Lau- s Personal Tutoring Available "After talking to a number of Email Laura Carlson or Dan Polischuk at: rier University Students Union Management Committee mem- [email protected] [email protected] (WLUSU) became a full member s Thousands of Satisfied Students bers from last year, as well as the of the Canadian Alliance of Stu- incomings, going to the electronic dents Association (CASA). organizational model would be Lauren McNiven, WLUSU vice the best idea," he said. president of university affairs is Matt Park, Chair of the WLUSU the primary delegate of CASA Board of Directors agreed that at WLU and will attend CASA's "it was a decision with Dan [Al- 6 International WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY 2009 troop return unlikely Experts gather at WLU to discuss Canada's role in the reconstruction of Afghanistan

LAURA CARLSON Ed deliveries across the board," said NEWS EDITOR Hetherington. He also believes that the key to With every soldier that comes success in Afghanistan is ensuring home in a body bag, and with ev- that any aid offered is not imposed. ery multi-million dollar tank pur- Upon entering the Kandahar re- chased bythe government, Canadi- gion, Hetherington says his team ans seem to be feeling increasingly made one thing clear: "We are here skeptical of our current mission in to support the government and let Afghanistan. the government help the people." However, comments from in- He feels that "understanding the ternational experts who gathered needs of the local population is es- at Wilfrid Laurier University on sential and if that is done, then a May 14 and 15 confirmed what great deal can be achieved." you would suspect representatives Hetherington was one of 30 mili- from the United Nations, NATO, tary, foreign affairs, development the US State Department and the and academic professionals who Canadian Forces to say: while our gathered at WLU to participate in efforts in Afghanistan are making the fourth of a series of workshops a difference, they are, at the same about Afghanistan. The conferences were put on by the Laurier Center for "I don't think withdrawal Military Strategic and IS DESIRABLE OR LIKELY IN THE Disarmament Studies (LCMSDS), the Center NEXT FOUR TO TEN YEARS, BUT for International Gover- MODIFICATION IS INEVITABLE." nance Innovation (CIGI) and theAcademic Coun- cil on the United - Professor Terry Copp Na- tions Systems (ACUNS). This workshop focused time, not enough. specifically on the role of PRTs in Lt.-Col. Simon Hetherington Afghanistan. spent over seven months in Kan- Katherine Sage Hayes, the work- dahar as the commanding officer shop's coordinator, says the goal of a Canadian Provincial Recon- of the conference is to make the struction Team (PRT) and, from Afghanistan mission clear to the his experience, the aid we are cur- public. rently offering in Afghanistan has "It falls on the people of Canada allowed the country to see real to ask the hard questions," said improvements. Hayes. "If we're reconstructing in In responding to the needs of cit- Afghanistan, [we need to ask] what izens, Lt-Col. Hetherington's team are we reconstructing?" Riley Taylor actively worked with the Afghani Though the workshop remained MAKING SENSE OF IT ALL - Prof. Terry Copp speaking at the conference about PRTs in Afghanistan. government and in 2006 witnessed closed to the public to protect par- the re-population ofkey villages as ticipants' opinions from falling un- a chance to ask selected experts port to the war-stricken country. withdrawal is desirable or likely in well as the re-opening of schools der government and media scru- some questions themselves. "Afghanistan is not in black and the next four to ten years, but modi- and markets. tiny, a report of the conferences' The panel discussion held in the not beyond salvation," Professor fication is inevitable," said Copp.

"We are making progress and findings will be made available to Maureen Forrester Recital Hall fea- Maley - director of theAsia-Pacific Professor Thakur also felt that a people are getting back to their way the public at a later date. Hayes tured three of the workshop's key School of Diplomacy at the Austra- quick exit from Afghanistan is not oflife," said Hetherington. hopes that many of the looming participants, each of whom were lian National University - told the the best strategy for the military to He explains that the people of questions Canadians have about able to offer a plethora of knowl- crowd. take. "Costs of exit and re-entry are Afghanistan receive Canadians the mission in Afghanistan will be edge to an eager and mostly senior Though 2009 seems to be the high and if we believe [helping re- very positively, which he attributes answered in this report. audience. date burned into everyone's minds construct Afghanistan] is worth do- to the tangible changes that have Aside from various written docu- Professors William Maley, Ra- regarding the removal of Canadian ing and doable, then we need to fo- occurred since PRTs began the re- mentation, a public lecture on the mesh Thakur and Terry Copp spoke troops in Afghanistan, at the mo- cus on the things we need to do so building process in 2001. first day of the conference entitled of their opinions regarding Afghan- ment Professor Terry Copp, direc- we don't have to come back again." "[The people of Afghanistan] 'Afghanistan and After' gave mem- istan and unanimously agreed that tor ofLCMSDS, does not necessari- 14 need to see results and we provid- bers of the Waterloo community we must continue to offer our sup- ly see this happening. "I don't think See PAGE for editorial reaction to this story Army besieges militants in refugee camp

slip out ofthe camp during sporad- under Islamic Sharia'a Law and to Civil unrest reaches fevered pitch in northern Lebanon; death toll hits 80 ic moments of calm, or sometimes fight Israel. dodge militant sniper fire or the Since the beginning of the Nahr- WALEED HAFEEZ Bared camp, which consists of Pal- continues, began with a barrage army's constant shelling in order to El-Bared clash, the Lebanese gov- INTERNATIONAL EDITOR estinian refugee families, in hopes of artillery and heavy machine- save their own lives. ernment has asked for $280 million of luring Fateh-al-Islam members gun fire aimed at points within As of now, only 13,000 refugees for military assistance from the In what has now become the worst out, dead or alive. the camp where it was known that have been able to leave the camp, United States. case of civil unrest since the end Initially, militants had seized Fateh-al-Islam had set up. with many calling for a ceasefire According to US State Depart- of the 1990 civil war, the Lebanese Lebanese army positions at the en- The current death toll from the and for the military to at least let ment spokesperson Sean McCor- army surrounded and tried to weed trances to the Nahr-El-Bared camp offensive is at 80, with even more UN relief workers into the camp. mack, approximately $220 million out members of the Fateh-al-Islam and had captured two armored injured on both sides. In a camp Fateh-al-Islam is an Islamist would go to the army and another group who had set up base in the carriers. It was also reported that of approximately 40,000 refugees, group led by fugitive militant Shak- $60 million would go to security Nahr-El-Bared refugee camp in the gunmen had opened fire and am- the civilian death toll has remained er Al-Abssi and has set up base in forces. He added that the United north of the country. bushed a military unit, killing two relatively low — eight dead and 60 the middle of the Nahr-El-Bared States was weighing the request. Near Lebanon's second largest soldiers. injured. camp since November of last year. city, Tripoli, theLebanese army set The Lebanese army's retaliation, With electricity and water cut off Their main goals have been to themselves up around the Nahr-El- which began on May 20 and still to the camp, refugees have had to reform Palestinian refugee camps The Cord Weekly ■ Wednesday may 30,2007 International . 7 Green Zone under attack

'Baghdad Country Club' is no longer an oasis of security after :: a number of attacks over the last two months

ASHLEY DOODNAUTH Military police also have the authority to STAFF WRITER T stop anyone en route to the International Zone at any time. Amidst a war-torn country and an inter- Yet, with all these measures in place to national controversy lies an oasis. The In- protect people within the Green Zone, Sep- ternational Zone, better known to locals as tember of 2003 saw the first of many future the "Green Zone" or the "Baghdad Country attacks. Guerrillas fired three rockets at

Club" is a 10-kilometer haven beside the Ti- the A 1 Rashid Hotel — which was home to gris River in Baghdad. American soldiers and media at the time. Priorto the American invasion, "The Bub- According to BBC News, this attack was in ble" was the site of Saddam Hussein's Baath retaliation to the new power that had taken partyheadquarters. The area included villas, over the International Zone earlier in the palaces and various monuments, including year. the very recognizable crossed sabers. Recent events within the Green Zone have The district also housed Uday and Qusay officials worriedabout their current security Hussein's numerous torture chambers and levels. On April 17, a bomb went off in the often doubled as the roaming grounds of Iraqi Parliament cafeteria, killing one per- theirpet lions. son and injuring 22 others. In mid-March, After the Americans took Baghdad and discarded suicide belts were found within the Green Zone in April 2003, the area now the walls of the International Zone. holds the US Embassy as well as the Iraqi And on March 22, during a news confer- government. ence held by United Nations Secretary-Gen- According to the Washington Post, since eral Ban Ki-moon, a mortar round landed the US took over the area, approximate- in the Green Zone, which once again highly 5000 Iraqi squatters have moved into lighted the obvious lack of sufficient secu- abandoned buildings scattered across the rity measures. surrounding periphery, referred to as the So where are these breaches originating "Green Zone's Slum." from? According to BBC News and Fareed The "Red Zone" is US jargon for the unse- Sabri, a spokesperson for the Iraqi Islamic cured areas outside the walls of the Interna- party in the UK, the oversights are the result tional Zone. ofthe number of bodyguards thatneed to be Often called the ultimate gated commu- checked on a daily basis. lIR nity, it consists of various checkpoints and "I'm sure some of the MPs have got peo- is patrolled by bomb-sniffing dogs, body ple who are either affiliated to al-Qaeda and and vehicle scanners and is excluded to some who have been able to smuggle bombs the outside world by barbed wire and chain inside theIraqi Parliament," says Sabri. link fences. The entire complex is encircled Seeing as 10,000 bodyguards enter the IK-:. Jj| ■ by "T-Walls," which are made ofreinfdrced Green Zone for the sole purpose ofprotecting blast-proof concrete to ensure maximum politicians, performing background checks security. on all would be practically impossible. IDs and credentials vary between differ- A once serene place, the "Baghdad Coun- ent people so as to distinguish a hierarchy of try Club" has been compromised. Deter- personnel within the walls. mined Iraqi resistance will continue to infil- According to BBC News, up to eight trate the security measure, leaving the fate checks can be encountered for those who of the International Zone hanging in the are going into the parliamentary area within balance. the Green Zone.

Contributed Photo - US Department of Defense

BLACK HAWK DOWN - Black Hawk helicopters land at the very recognizable crossed sabers inside the Green Zone, once home to Saddam Hussein's party headquarters. 8 Sports WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY Football stars draftedto CFL Drafted fifth overall by the Calgary Stampeders, linebacker Justin Phillips becomes the highest WLU draftee since 1978

Sydney Helland

GOLDEN FUTURE - Justin Phillips, left, and Yannick Carter enjoy the sunshine while tossing a pigskin as teammates for one of the last times, while Phillips' faithful dog looks on.

LAUREN MILLET I got drafted at all," said Carter. "It is coaching staff that he will be playing and faster game," reasoned SPORTS EDITOR a huge accomplishment regardless ing in the position of weak side Carter. "Both Montreal and Toron- Notable Golden of how late or early I was selected." linebacker. "This is a great spot for to have already moved to a smaller The dreams of two young Laurier Carter and Phillips began play- me because it entails a lot of duties linebacker system and have done Hawk draft picks men came a step closer to being re- ing football for the Golden Hawks that I am good at and comfortable very well with it." He added that it's alized on Wednesday, May 2. when they came to WLU in the fall with. I will be rushing the passer not always just about the size of the Corey Grant - WR (1999)

The CFL draft saw two ofthe best of 2003. "I knew they were special and blitzing quite often - some- players, but their motivation to be #7 to Hamilton Tiger-Cats players to ever come out of Wil- athletes who would be outstand- thing I did at Laurier with a lot of successful, and turn the strengths Last Top 10 draft pick frid Laurier's football program say ing university players," commented success." of the other team into weaknesses. goodbye to their beloved school Manager of Football Operations "With Justin's versatility, he could "Football is a mental game, if you Bruce Holland - DT (1978) and make their way into the world and Head Coach Gary Jeffries. "I play defensive end, linebacker or ask me." #4 to Hamilton Tiger-Cats ofprofessional football. Justin Phil- was confident if they put in the free safety," praised Jeffries. "We Phillips has noticed an increased Last Top 5 draft pick lips was selected fifth by the Cal- work and the dedication they have never had a player in the 37 importance for players to train to

gary Stampeders, while Yannick would have an opportunity to play years Ihave been atLaurier that was build strength and speed, instead Brian Beckles - C (1989) Carter went 20th to the Saskatch- at the next level." capable ofplaying those three posi- of simply focusing on getting big- #54 to Toronto Argonauts ewan Roughriders. Phillips said that ever since he tions equally well. He is very gifted ger and relying on natural speed Currently the director of WLU "I could not be more pleased the was a child, playing sports and and he works extremely hard." abilities. AlumniRelations way things worked out in the draft," watching games on TV, he knew he Carter also received some high Jeffries was eager to commend

said Phillips. "I wanted to play for wanted to become a professional accolades from his former coach. his prized players for their abili- Stefan Ptaszek - WR (1994) Calgary, and everything seemed to athlete. "When I started playing "Yannick has exceptional speed ties both on and off the field. "They #9 to BC Lions work out." football at age thirteen, it became and can pressure the quarterback stood out because of their excep- Now the Head Coach of arch-ri- Carter had slightly different something I really wanted, and to and cover an inside receiver at his tional ability. They made plays for val McMasterMarauders emotions following the draft. "I finally have the dream come true is [strong side] linebacker position. us consistently; they have to rank in was a litde shocked about how late a great feeling." To be able to do both as well as he the top 10 percent of all the football my name was called," he reflected. Both guys will be playing simi- can is certainly what the CFL scouts athletes who have ever played at Drafted Players "But for the most part the situation lar positions to those which they are looking for." Laurier." Since that has presented itself is the best experienced in their time with the Coming from a school that pri- "Off the field they have a pres- 2000

possible outcome for me. The op- Hawks. Carter will most likely re- marily utilizes its speed to its ad- ence - not cocky but confident," portunity I have to be successful is main as strong side linebacker; vantage, the players maybe consid- he continued. "They have worked Ryan Jeffrey - OL - #15 (2004) far greater at Saskatchewan than however, he states optimistically ered undersized when compared to extremely hard for this opportunity Connor Healey - DB - #27 (2004) any other team." that if faced with a newrole, he will the likes ofLaval, their giant neigh- and their time has come. They are Andre Talbot - WR - #34 (2001)

Not to mention he will be joining be more than accepting of it. bours to the East. This did not seem very proud young men - proud of Jesse Alexander - LB - #37 (2006) former teammate Jesse Alexander "For me, it's not about the posi- to hinder their chances in the draft the school, the football program Joel Wright - DB - #41 (2006) and former Golden Hawks Donnie tion, it's about playing football. I however; in fact, smaller, faster and where they have come from." Justin Shakell - DL - #45 (2004)

Ruiz and Corey Grant. "All in all, I feel I would be able to play any po- players may become a thing of the Steven Frake - DB - #52 (2004)

' was pleased with the outcome of sition they threw at me." future. Ed Becker -K - #53(2003) the draft, and most importantly that Phillips was told by his new "Speed equates to a more excit- The Cord Weekly ■ Wednesday may 30,2007 Sports . 9 AC closed for damage control Renovations are taking place in the Athetic Complex to repair damages that occurred last summer; AC to open in mid-June

LAURA CARLSON the contractor, who is cooperating NEWS EDITOR because they understood that it was their fault," said Baxter. The gymnasium at the Athletic Despite the fact the storm dam- Complex (AC) is wrapping up six age occurred almost a year ago, the weeks of construction to repair university chose only to complete $170,000 worth of damages to the remedial repairs to the gymnasium floors resulting from a combination floors immediately after the flood- of severe weather and an unfortu- ing. Though the gym was closed for nate mistake. nearly a month last September, the university was fully aware Despite the fact the that a major overhaul needed to be done this STORM DAMAGE OCCURED summer. ALMOST A YEAR AGO, THE "We knew that we couldn't just replace the UNIVERSITY CHOSE ONLY TO floor right away. We knew COMPLETE REMEDIAL REPAIRS we had to do it in two steps TO THE GYMNASIUM FLOORS because we didn't want to disrupt any obligations we

IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE - had tostudents," explained Mike Whitehouse yvww.laurierathletics.com

- gym renovations also upgrades, including system. FLOODING. Baxter. RECONSTRUCTION With come a new audio Though the damage has certainly been an incon- cal upgrades, which permit access tionsfinish up, new ones will begin don't want to risk it flooding again "We had a major problem last venience for both students and to the internet and tracking online with the excavation of an AC wall. and we haven't got to the bottom of August when the contractor was faculty, the Athletics Department scores. Contractors are trying to locate a where it is." fixing the roof," said Peter Baxter, is taking advantage of what Roly "It's a positive for our facility in piping problem which caused over "Generally for most people, al- director of athletics and recreation. Webster, coordinator of facilities the end, but it's a big hassle for our $100,000 worth of damages to the though it is an imposition for them, "[The workers] forgot to tie down at the AC, calls an "unfortunate operations and our customers, but dance studio and multi-purpose it's understandable that there is a the roof one night and we had a opportunity." there's not much we can do about flooring when the snow melted in necessity to do major maintenance major storm which caused a flood." The gymnasium upgrades in- it," said Webster. March. as well as repairs at a time when According to Baxter, insurance clude moving the controls for the The gymnasium will open for "We know what caused the leak the bulk ofthe users, the fee-paying claims have been filed and thus scoreboards, eliminating a dead convocation on June 6 and will be that time but we're still concerned students, are not necessarily using aside from a $50,000 deductible, no space in the floor (a hangover from open for public rentals again on with the way the rain water is being it," added Baxter. repair costs will be falling directly the 19705), installing a new audio June 11. drained away from the building," on the university. "We worked with system, and making some electri- However, just as the gym renova- said Webster. "The problem is we

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:% — - L : ' \ "■' : / ' ; :V;>- ! ;v. • v-'.-,". m | . - 10 WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 THE CORD WEEKLY Weekly ■ Feature The Cord Wednesday may 30,2007 Feature . 11 Far from home and far from bored

Students who choose to find summer employment through Laurier co-op and other WLU [Illegible] get a ch ance to explore exciting career opportunities. Take a look at our case studies below.

Steven Hughes job." [working] in Honda in general," ing] really comes to mind. It's all So what exactly is it that Steven says Hughes, "but I'm the only one just a learning experience." The Dave de Ninas y Ninos Internacional International is dedicated to ensur- Fitzsimmons agrees. "It is great ish has become so much better," Hometown: Owen Sound, ON does for Honda? Lots. His main in HR." Still, he's met others scat- Owen Sound native, who's renting Shrishma nd (DNI) in Costa Rica. ing on-going, practical, systematic to work in a human rights organi- says Fitzsimmons. "I am now able DAVID SHORE Program: BBA, completed 2 year. responsibility is recruiting new tered around Honda Canada's ex- a basement apartment to work and FEATURES Hometown: Emigrated from India, and concerted international action zation. I want to do international to give the taxi driver directions!" EDITOR employees to the company. Over pansive three-building office. And live in Toronto, has taken the large still looking for a hometown. Each year, the Laurier Research directed towards promoting my master's de- The girls have been taking Span- Summer Job: Working for Hon- his wOrk term, he will have to work while he may not come into con- responsibility he's received and and development for Program: Political Science major, Chair in Human Rights, Dr. Rhoda protecting the rights of the child." gree so that I can eventually work in ish lessons twice a week, but the With another summer already in da Canada's Human Resources closely with the managers of many tact with other co-op students on turned it into a thoroughly positive graduating in June. Howard-Hassman, sponsors an in- The two women have slightly this field as a career. This language barrier has made life full stride, most Laurier students Department. departments to decide whether a regular basis, Steven was quick experience. opportu- ternship in human rights. This year, different tasks within the organi- nity with DNI is an incredible step- challenging for them. "We felt like have returned to their home- or not to approve applicants. He to mention that his favourite thing Steven's business education at Dr. Howard-Hassman, in collabo- zation. Shrishma is with stone to me reach those infants when we here, because towns to seek summer employ- Steven Hughes is a very driven and also takes time to go out into the about his summer job is the staff Laurier has helped him a great working ping help got Bronwen ration with Human Rights Inter- the Fundraising and Communica- goals." we could not communicate how we ment. For some though, Laurier highlyresponsible student, current- field and actively recruit possible that he works with. "Honda has deal, especially the course he took net, an tions Unit of DNI, Even more is or what we wanted," Dave. Co-op presents a second option, ly studying atLaurier in the Faculty employees. been great," he says. "I've really in organizational behaviour, which Ottawa-based organization, currently spend- exciting, though, felt says Fitzsimmons arranged for Shrishma Dave and ing much of her time searching for adjusting to life in a new of the Working with all Spanish-speaking helping students to find job ofBusiness. He's just beginning his He's also "responsible for deliv- enjoyed it. I work with really great has been very relevant to the HR part Bronwen Fitzsimmons to travel to English-written human rights arti- world. "Costa Rica is co-workers has been difficult for placements that they may never summer job, but he'll be working ering orientations to all new em- staff... they've been great at getting field and will help him in the eight gorgeous. I Hometown: Oakville, ON Costa Rica to Defensa de practice have found on their own. Cord at Honda's HR headquarters in a ployees, which involves explaining me oriented." months ahead. But Hughes has work for cles online and translating written can see the Irazu Mountains from them, but with and lots Program: Sociology and Women's Ninas y Ninos Internacional (De- proposals into English. Bronwen, my window," says Shrishma. of body language, they have been Features speaks to five students co-op placement that will last him Honda policies and answering any Steven is hard pressed to find already learned a lot, namely the in is is nice full to cope. who've traveled far from home, the next eight months. questions they may have." And as if a downside to his job. "[Noth- "importance of working well with Studies, graduating June. fense of Children International). meanwhile, working on DNl's "San Pedro really and learning As on www. on Bronwen. are so some even internationally, to He landed the job with a lot of that isn't enough work, he's already people, working in ateam." He also stated their website, campaign inclusive education, ofstudents," adds "We Still, their internship far has Summer Interns Children an initiative achieve better edu- distance all been an ex- find summer jobs that they'll help from Laurier Co-op, and their finding he's got many administra- cites keeping the lines of Job: with Defensa dci-is.org, "Defence for to walking to the shops. unparalleled learning cation The are and perience. is a never forget. website in particular. "I saw the tive tasks around the office to at- communication open for child labourers and other people really friendly "DNI making huge the weather is beauti- difference in the lives posting on the site, I applied, I went tend to. with supervisors to be marginalized children. helpful, and of children For both Shrishma and when it's not raining." around the world," Bronwen. for an interview and I had to say "There are lots of students ofkey importance. Bronwen, ful says 'yes' or 'no' to the position. It was their time at DNI has been excit- They share a two-bedroom apart- "I am startingto see the beauty in just like applying for any other ing. "We have access to reports and ment in San Pedro, the university this simple lifestyle," adds Shrish- documents from across the globe, district of San Jose, and take a taxi ma. "People are kind, helpful and i It's a lot of fascinating informa- to and from Moravia, the town unrushed." ' tion at myfingertips," says Dave. where DNI: Costa Rica is located. "Over the last two weeks, my Span-

"You're not dealing with the same "We have access to reports and THING EVERY DAY. It's LIKE OPENING A DOCUMENTS FROM ACROSS THE PRESENT ... YOU'RE NEVER BORED." GLOBE. It's a lot of fascinating

- Sheena Henderson, co-op student INFORMATION AT MY FINGERTIPS."

- Shrishma Dave, Laurier Grad

dents right now. I've met people her new kind ofwork can be tricky. from the U.S., Africa, Europe, Ire- "I didn't take business, so I don't Sheena land." Laurier has a co-op exchange know much about Excel or other program with the University of data programs." Henderson had an Ulster. But despite the challenges she's agreement Right from the start, Kayla, along faced, Kayla's time in Ireland has with Parks Can with Laurier business student Paul been extremely rewarding. "It's a

r Hometown: Cambridge, ON for some time now," Radoja, knew how different life in life-changing experience; it's awe- Program: Archaeology major, says Henderson. "I have a Ireland would be. "The first thing some," she explains. "It's a once in nd Renaud completed 2 year. 30-year-old colleague at Parks Kayla we noticed was [cars] driving on a lifetime opportunity." Kayla plans Can who also went to Laurier." One the other side of the road," she to have a career ininternational de- Summer Job: Co-op with Parks of the best things for Sheena has tray ofceramic shards, having to di- Hometown: Northern Ontario laughs. But Kayla believes that it is velopment, and she feels that her Canada, working with War of 1812 been the interesting people she's vide them into five piles when they Program: Global Studies and Span- the abundance of history and cul- time working in the related field of artifacts at historical sites. working with. "Archaeologists can't all look the same," she said. But ish, completed 2nd year. ture in Belfast that really make it community development will be just be deskjockeys; they have to be while some tasks seem daunting, this ex- feel different from Canada. very helpful. Sheena Henderson knew since she free spirited," she jokes. listening to the professors give the perience," Summer Job: Research Assistant Kayla and Paul are working as She's already learned a lot from it. was in th that sth5 grade she wanted "I'm really, really excited for the history behind the artifacts makes proclaims for Northern Ireland Housing Ex- research assistants, doing housing "You have to be open to newthings, to work as an archaeologist. This dig season," Henderson exclaims. up for it. Henderson. ecutive in Belfast, Ireland. surveys for the municipal govern- I think... and have patience." When summer she begins her first ever Over the summer she will be dig- Sheena is staying in a residence Sheena has ment of Belfast. Their time is split things go wrong, "you have to be job in the a co-op field: placement ging at Fort Henry in Kingston, as room at St. Lawrence College in nothing but As a Global Studies student, Kayla between compiling survey results strong about it," she adds. with three otherLaurier at well 1 students as some other Kingston histor- Cornwall, much like her room in praise for her Lau- Renaud was thrilled at the pros- and entering the data, and going Kayla and Paul return to Canada Parks Canada. ical sites, to find what archaeolo- Clara Conrad Hall when she was rier education. "If you pect of working internationally out in the field to collect surveys. in early August, after completion After two and a half weeks at gists call "historic material culture" in first year. There's not a lot to do ask anybody, they'll tell this summer. Like all other co-op Right now they are conducting sur- of their three-month co-op term. the position, most of her time has from the time period of the War of in Cornwall, she says, but she loves you Laurier has the best students, Kayla saw her position veys on neighbourhood renewal, Both are very excited to continue been spent preparing for field work 1812. the travel opportunities. "You can Archaeology program in the posted through Laurier Co-op, and homeless rates, and overall hous- working in Belfast and see how in labs, but she's also taken three Sheena's favourite part of the go to Montreal for $35!" she says province," Henderson says. "I've went through the required applica- ing satisfaction. their summer plays out. field trips to historic forts where is fact hard job "the that there's variety. happily. applied so much of it to my work." tionprocess. But unlike most other "Sometimes it's gettingpeo- her supervisor gives tours. guided You're not dealing with the same Though she always knew she However, after being immersed co-op students, her placement has ple to do surveys," says Kayla, when "It's good for us because we get thing every day. It's like opening a wanted to end up in archaeology, into the culture of 1812, Sheena taken her all the way to Belfast, Ire- asked what the hardest part of her to learn history," says Henderson. present... you're never bored." But the amount of people in the field can't wait to take some courses in land to live in residence at the Uni- job is. "We try to get a seventy per- "[lt's] really an information rich there are some tough parts to the she's met have helped her decide Canadian History. versity of Ulster. cent rate ofresponse." Dealing with For more information about experience." experience too. exactly what she wants for the fu- "It's pretty awesome," Renaud difficult people hasn't been the Laurier's co-op opportunities, Graphic by Mallory O'Brien "Apparently Laurier Co-op has "It's frustrating to look at a ture. "I've found my niche through says of living on campus at Ulster. only tough part of her job either. visit www.wlu.ca/co-op/ "There are lots of international stu- Renaud is finding that adjusting to 12 Student Life WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY A summer to-do for the 'Loo

Waterloo is a great place to be during the summer with lots of things to do for those who have to stay around for summer courses or work. There are lots of fun things to do in the Kitchener-Waterloo area that don't reguire a car.

MYA WIJBENGA to a lack of time. To get some craft STAFF WRITER ideas, head over to Michael's, a bead store like the Bead Bazaar on ASHLEY JANG King Street or a pottery shop like STUDENT LIFE EDITOR Lucy's Mud House. If you feel like seeing or buying some art, check Music festivals out Stitch'n'Kitsch's summer fling lh sale and show on June 9 , located In search of a great time at a mu- at the corner of King and William sic festival? The Uptown Waterloo streets. Jazz Festival takes place from July 12lh until 15th with headliners like Biking Ivana Santilli and Sophie Milman. If you're not into jazz, check out Biking can be a great workout and the Kichener Blues, Brews, and a great way to see more ofWaterloo Barbeque Festival from August 9th Region. The Iron Horse Bike trail is to 12th with groups like Eric Burdon just one example of the routes you and theAnimals and the Jeff Healey can bike along, found on theWater- Blues Band. loo Cycling Club website. It's a five kilometer paved trail that stretches Waterloo Park from one end ofKitchener through Waterloo. Tight on money, but stilllooking for a fun way to fill your day? Waterloo Endurrun Park has a petting zoo, fields to play all sorts ofsports on and it is perfect The Endurrun is held in Waterloo to shape up and go running, take a from August 12th until 19th and is stroll or just sit in the sun on one what they call the Tour de France of the swings. Go out and have a of running. It starts and finishes at cheap lunch bypacking one up and RIM Park and goes all around the enjoying the picnic facilities. Kitchener-Waterloo region. It takes a great runner to run 160 kilome- Arts and crafts ters in eight days.

Summer is a great time to do all those crafty things that came to mind, but were pushed back due

Mike Kitchen

A DONKEY - Waterloo Park is home to many beasts of the wild world, excluding gryphons and gold sheep.

Having a car means that going away is a lot easier. Day trips are a great way to feel like you're having a (very) short getaway.

Canoeing the Grand Camping

A way to see more of the Waterloo Spending the weekend at a camp- Region's surroundings is by canoe- ground can be very relaxing with- ing the Grand River where you can out breaking the bank. Waterloo of- rent canoes or kayaks for up to 10 fers some campgrounds like Laurel hours. It will be a great workoutand Creek, which is located at North- it will definitely be more fun that field and Westmount, a 10-minute hitting up the gym. drive from Laurier. It offers swim- ming, windsurfing, hiking, and bird Go-karting watching at 130 campsites.

Grab a few friends and find out Bingeman's who's the fastest person on wheels at Erbsville Kartway, located in the Venture into Kitchener and hit Contributed Photo northwest corner of Waterloo. It's up Bingeman's, which offers the a combination of action and fun area's biggest water park, beach while having a great time with afew volleyball, and campgrounds. Play friends. a round on the golf course at Glen Ridge Golf, also located at the park. St. Jacobs Farmer's Market Baseball

One of the area's tourist attractions Catch a Kitchener Panthers Inter- can also be attractive for locals. St. county ball game at the Kitchener Jacobs Farmer's Market is a place Auditorium, located just 10minutes to shop, visit the oudet mall and from downtown Kitchener. Their find some amazing foods that seem schedule can be found at http:// to be impossible to find anywhere panthersbaseball.com/schedule. else. You can also go for a horse- htm. drawn trolley ride for a tour of a Mennonite farm.

Mike Brown The Cord Weekly ■ Wednesday may 30,2007 Student Life 13 Novaledictorianvoice forconvocation Laurier still has no valedictorian speech during graduation ceremony, despite the efforts of a grad student to bring it back

ASHLEY JANG The grad formal, however, no STUDENT LIFE EDITOR longer takes place. "What happened over the years was that the For the past three years, Laurier's level of interest in the grad formal convocation ceremonies have been events really declined," said Dean missing what some might consider of Students David McMurray. an essential part of the graduation Because interest in the event de- process: a valedictorian speech. clined, there were limited volun- Unlike many other campuses, Lau- teers who wanted to help organize rier has essentially accepted this as it. "Interest in students to organize tradition. the formal committee and the vot- "The experience in the last few ing for the awards was very low," years was pretty negative and that's said McMurray. why we suggested not doing it at With a process as long as con- convocation," said WLU President vocation it's difficult to make time Dr. Bob Rosehart. "We also ran into for everything. As a result, not only problems with convocation being has the speech been removed but so large so we started to have tim- the hooding, alumni address, and ing issues." Board of Governors' welcome ad- Speech content was also a key dress as well. "If the whole cer- Contributed photo factor in the removal of the speech. emony lasts more than a couple STUDENT PRIDE - The valedictorian speech is a tradition in academic institutions, but no longer at WLU. "The speeches were mixed; that's of hours, it's not a positive experi- one of the reasons it disappeared," ence," said Rosehart. said Rosehart. In an attempt to get the valedic- the graduation process. "It's a train the last few years to keep it, to "If they're going to tell students to

As a result, the valedictorian torian speech reinstated, Laurier dition at most other schools and at keep thepomp and ceremony - but elect the valedictorian I'd like to see speech was moved to take place graduate Jason Shim has been in my own graduation I would like to to keep it moving along as well," exit fulfilled in all senses of the word," at the grad formal, an event orga- contact with the university to dis- have some student input, given that plained Rosehart. he added. nized by the grad formal commit- cuss the matter. "There have been we're spending years and money at "I'm not saying that getting a' Waterloo's convocation ceremo- tee. At the formal, various awards some embarrassing or inappro- this school." valedictorian up there will sud- nies will take place in five ceremo- were typically presented, including priate speeches made by previous Despite Shim's attempts to have denly make convocation 100 times nies spread over three days, from the valedictorian. "[lt] seemed like valedictorians and that was a little the speech reinstated, th£ Senate better but I guess my expectation is June 6-8. a more appropriate venue for the disappointing to hear," he said. Executive Committee has rejected that someone could make it really comments that were being made," According to Shim, a valedicto- it. meaningful and touch a few people saidRosehart. rian speech is an important part of "We've tried everything we could in the audience," said Shim. See PAGE 14 for editorial reaction to this story

Wednesday, June 6,1:00 pm Convocation schedule Faculty of Graduate Studies - doctoral, masters degrees in Arts, Thursday, June 7,10:00 am Thursday, June 7,1:30 pm Friday, June 8,10:00 am Friday, June 8,1:30 pm

School of Business & Economics, School ofBusiness & Economics - Faculty of Music, Science - Bach- Faculty of Arts General Bachelors Faculty of Arts Honours Bachelors Science, Social Work, Music, Wa- Bachelors degrees and diplomas elors degrees and diplomas degrees degrees terloo Lutheran Seminary Location: Waterloo Memorial Rec- Location: Waterloo Memorial Rec- Location: Waterloo Memorial Rec- Location: Waterloo Memorial Rec- Location: Athletic Complex, WLU reation Complex at 101 Father Da- reation Complex at 101 Father Da- reation Complex at 101 Father Da- reation Complex at 101 Father Da- Waterloo Campus, Corner of King vidBauer Drive. vid Bauer Drive. vidBauer Drive. vidBauer Drive. St.and UniversityAve.

Campus services Teach English

, Overseas Summer0 hours W' C-Spot AC Health Services Program Monday-Thursday Monday-Thursday Monday and Wednesday • Classroom Management Techniques 9am-10pm 7am-10pm B:3oam-7:3opm 3 U .•*«..• m i:• HH v Detailed Lesson Planning Friday Saturday Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday

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8 am-1:30 pm One Card Office Monday, Thursday, and Friday # Thousands of Satisfied Students

/The Hub 8:30 am-4:30 pm . * Wilfs Monday-Friday Tuesday and Wednesday I jYC D Y*) * Monday-Thursday 8:30 am-4:30 pm 8:30 am-8 pm •*» ■•■$$&&&>> oh M I N A no 11:30 am-3 pm Friday ' The Bookstore Foot Patrol 1-800"779-1779 / 416"924"3240 11:30 am-2 am Monday-Friday Saturday-Thursday WWW.oXfordS6min3rS.Com 8:30 am-4:30 pm 9 pm-1 am im Ho*ons UNIVSRSIT p Library Monday-Thursday Monday-Thursday PHARMACY i.58 |ting bi N al I Friday Friday Closed except for special events KIBBPSIBB Ave. ■ Bam-lpmo 8:30 am-5 pm lWwsi.lv ■ Science Building Saturday and Sunday Terrace 8 85" 2 53 Q I Monday-Thursday 11 am-5 pm Closed ■jH|l|Ri||H|fl HhHH| 8 am-2 pm o.*:j flan --Aaseptei HHHH Friday 14 Opinion WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 > THE CORD WEEKLY Grads need student voice

At universities across the country, a valedictorian address is a customary component of convocation ceremonies. Not at Laurier. Since 2003, there has been no valedictorian address, and for years before that the address did not take place at convocation because of administration's concerns of timeconstraints and inappropriate content. It is time, though, that this changes. A valedictorian address provides the opportunity for a final peer send-off for graduates. And after years of hard work, time and money invested in the school, it is a well-deserved opportunity. While convocation is a long ceremony, a number of measures - from putting time limits on speeches to making sure that the administration's

speeches do not overlap - should be implemented long before the students' voice is removed. The valedictorian is chosen for a reason: he or she is the person who best represents the experiences, hopes and achievements of the majority of the graduating class. The administration should not say the content he or she picks to share is inappropriate, for they are thekind ofmoments that graduates will remember the best of their time at Laurier. After all, many students will never even speak to the likes of Dr. Bob in their four years, and the reflections admin offers are undoubtedly less important to the av- erage graduate than those of a peer. While it is reasonable for administration to review the address before it is given, it would be foolish for them not to realize many of the most important occurrences in students' university careers do not happen in the classroom as quiet, routine events.

Currently, administration is controlling convocation and shaping it into Dawn Zambonini what they desire it to be, but the ceremony should be for the graduates. Let them have their day. a missed Right to protest vital Conference Keeping peaceful, though perhaps unlawful, demonstrations out of chancefor WLUPR court saves time and money in an already overburdened system

As Laurier works toward fulfilling conference? Nobody knew. nity claims was wrongly taken to their issue and to the issues of its Century Plan, change can be It's understandable that the con- from them. other communities around the seen all around campus. Build- ference didn't take place through The blockade began in Febru- country. BLAIR ing expansion and renovations are the September to April academic ary 2006 and there been a FORSYTH-STARK has For many Canadians, this was taking place hand-in-hand with To schedule and run the year. EX-OPINION EDITOR police presence patrolling the site probably the first time they real- a growing number of applicants closed-door workshops while a stu- ever since. ized that land disputes were still and a growing student population. dentpopulation of over 10,000 is in Tory thinks that the costs in- ongoing and hadn't been resolved The university is also working to class would be a logistic nightmare. If John Tory had his way, any in- curred by these illegal protests when the pilgrims made dinner strengthen its international repu- And the primary purpose, after all, dividual or group who chose to shouldn't burden Canadian - or whatever the Canadian equiv- tation, developing links with other was the bringing together of these stand up for their rights would be citizens, and thus thinks that by alent is. "W institutions across the globe. experts, so their schedule no doubt sued - or worse yet, thrown in jail. pursuing legal action against pro- By bringing light to their issue that With news Laurier hosted factored in. Ontario's Opposition Leader testers, it will benefit the greater and gaining media attention, the a number of internationally re- But this doesn't excuse the fact stated at the beginning ofMay that good. Native community has been able spected - experts for a conference on that thepublic lecture and confer- citizens who participate in illegal Aside from the fact that Cana- to gain more leverage than they the role of PRTs in Afghanistan, it ence - in general should have been protests or blockades should be dian court systems are already would have had they stuck to the seems as though administration is publicized more. subjected to legal repercussions overburdened and delayed, Tory's "legal" route of simply filing a doing a good job strengthening that Big changes are being made at for their actions. proposal demonstrates yet again complaint or a land claim. internationalreputation. Laurier. It's time to get the gears As Tory explained, "ifIwas made a preference of 'Canadian' pri- By persecuting protestors, Tory There is one problem, though: to its PR machine running, and let premier, I would use the court sys- orities over those of the aborigi- would not only be infringing on no matter how many international everyone know that it isn't a back- tem to say to people: we have ways nal Canadians, as if Natives aren't the right of Canadian citizens to conferences take place at Laurier, woods school with no international of dealing with our complaints, full-fledged Canadians, entitledto their freedom of assembly and they don't do a thing for WLU's rep- role. and they don't include blockades the same rights and privileges as speech, but he'd also be making utation if nobody knows. And this and occupations." other Canucks. it damn near impossible for any Right. How could people for- The preferences of govern- group that wasn't a favoured 'Ca- These unsigned editorials were agreed upon by at least two-thirds The of get? The government has incred- ment officials are made increas- nadian' priority to gain any kind Cord's editorial hoard and do not necessarily the views reflect ofThe Cord's ibly effective ways of dealing with ingly apparent when developers ofresolution to their complaint or volunteers, or WLUSP staff complaints. Like ignoring them are given permission to build on issue. until such a significant backlog is land whose claims have yet to be All Canadian citizens should created it them Weekly that forces to say resolved while the Native commu- be given the right to peaceful The Cord they're taking action, if only to nity's rights are ignored and their protests. Editorial Board 2007-08 appease the public, as is the case claims lost in the backlog. Whether in the courtroom or in with nearly 800 land claims made It is evident that aboriginal peo- boardroom, with the Editor-in-Chief Special Projects Editor Online Editor the dealing Mike Brown the Joe Turcotte Dan Belgue by Native community. ple, among other groups, don't problems raised by protestors is [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] While (519) 884-0710 ext. 3563 Tory claimed to be tak- have a level playing field when it going to cost Canadian citizens. Features Editor Photography Managers ing aim at all protesting groups, comes to having their demands News Editors David Shore Sydney Helland They might as well be given a Laura Carlson [email protected] [email protected] whether they be advocating for considered. And as the old cliche voice in the and leave the [email protected] streets or Student Life Editor Greg McKenzie environmental change farmer's goes, desperate times call for des- judicial system to deal with more Dan Polischuk Ashley Jang [email protected] rights, it is clear that Tory was spe- perate [email protected] [email protected] measures. important matters. (519) 884 0710 ext. 3564 Print Production Manager cifically taking aim at the highly The Six Nations people of Cale- If all else fails, the Canadian Arts & Entertainment Editor Alex Hayter publicized Native donia Sports Editor Paul Alviz [email protected] protests of late, surely didn't want to be- government might even consider Lauren Millet [email protected] such as the Caledonia gin [email protected] blockade a 15-month protest, costing dealing with the complaints be- Opinion Editor that began last year. them time, money and fore International Editor energy, they become protests, sav- Jeremy Tremblay The Waleed Hafeez [email protected] disruption in Caledonia but when their claims weren't ac- ing everyone the headaches and [email protected] was spearheaded by members of knowledged, they resorted to one heartaches of another 15-month the Six Nations of the Grand Riv- oftheir few options. blockade. The Cord Weekly is published by Wilfrid Laurier University Student Publications. er in response to a And it Contact: Keren Gottfried, 75 University Ave. W, Waterloo, ON N2L 3C5 development worked. Sort of. The pro- project on land that the commu- test brought national attention letters@cordweekly. com Weekly ■ Wednesday may The Cord 30,2007 Opinion . 15 Green trend lacks sacrifice ing a hybrid car. We are better off with the movement than without. My intention here is not to argue these points. ALLIE MAXTED Nonetheless, as cynical as it may RESIDENT CYNIC be to say so, the nature of the products born out of the movement Wind turbines, electric cars, carbon demonstrate it to be litde more offsets, animal rights: one of these than a way for people to feel like things, according to the increas- they are saving the world without ingly popular green movement, is truly understanding the issues. not like the others. Where do animal rights come With consumers finally being into this equation? Animal rights convinced of the realities of global and other deeply important envi- warming, it seems green will con- ronmental concerns have managed tinue to be the buzzword of choice to dodge the spotlight that shines for corporations and news media so brightly on carbon reduction. alike for quite some time. This neglect is the force behind But what does it mean to go the future problems we will face in green? battling climate change and envi- As I witness more and more me- ronmental destruction. dia telling me how to go green, I On the CBC's website I came increasingly see the movement as across an article about reusable a bandage placed around a cancer- shopping bags designed so as not stricken body. It makes us feel like to compromise style (as if the plas- we are doing something, but a ban- tic ones we have been using were Contributed photo dage is an overly simple and dan- stylish in the first place). AIN'T EASY BEING GREEN - Many trendy new green movement products don't address environmental con- solution for a problem that I love the gerous idea of reusable shop- cerns. British handbag designer Anya Hindmarch's cotton "I'm not a plastic bag" tote does a better job. will only grow more destructive if ping bags and applaud the govern- left unchecked. ment's plan to cut the use of the A recent Toyota ad serves as an plastic version by 50 percent. But The difficulty is that people see low those who can afford itto pay to lifestyle can be seen in nearly all example of the feel-good nature the particular reusable bag that I things like animal rights and car- become carbon neutral. You don't popular products of the new green of the movement. Buying a hybrid am talking about, valued at over bon emissions reduction as sepa- need to avoid flying if you can pay movement. Such an attitude has is equated with warm fuzzy things $900, is made of silk and calf skin. rate issues; however, they are all someone to plant a few trees to enabled us to get by in the past, and like life-changing medical break- I wonder ifI am the only one who connected to how we see our place make up for it. as a result we feel that it can con- throughs and charity work. We sees the irony in this. Silk has long in the world. As long as we contin- A similar idea applies with emis- tinue into the future. crave such reassurances and the been under the attack of environ- ue to see ourselves as the ultimate sions trading, where low-emitting The problem is, we've neverfaced huge green product market has mentalists, as the silk worms die masters of nature, we will always companies are able to sell their un- anything quite like global warming opened up to fulfill this need. when the cocoons are harvested. believe that we can fix our prob- used permission to pollute to dirti- before. The positive intent of the move- And calf skin, well, it's calf skin. lems with new ideas and technol- er companies. This idea has grown ment, for consumers if notcorpora- The bag is a contradiction initself ogyrather than sacrifice. into a multi-billiondollar business. tions, is likely genuine. You are, no and is a symbol of everything that's Carbon offsets are one way we've Unwillingness to sacrifice and doubt, doing a good thing by buy- wrong with the green movement. chosen to do this. Carbon offsets al- to fundamentally change one's [email protected] The orchestra oflife's smaller players History may glorify the leaders and conquerers, but the lovers, family-makers and workers of the world are just as important

- ers, consumers - respectable, quiet gives us our place always and ev- the Greeks called it. It contains the consciousness, relating ourselves and plodding folk. erywhere. We cannot do without values, ideals, conceptions that en- to a larger frame of reference, tak- Yet it would be a mediocre or- any one of us. If only we could get noble us and make us more than ing responsibility for our behavior chestra which relied exclusively on this truth into our hearts and live by mere dust. This world of ideas, the a broader vision of be- DON MORGENSON in things, ACADEMIC PERSPECTIVE its first violins. The second violin it, life would take on new meanings "eidos" of Plato, requires constant longing to a more inclusive world

section is absolutely vital and bi- and any labor wouldbecome a new cultivation and effort at its expan- community - these are the norms The best parts of human history ographies of so-called "great lives" dignity. sion or it slowly dims out of our ofhuman growth. Is there any con- are never written at all - family life, throw into quick relief the impor- And is it not the common pur- lives. Through such a connection, vincing reason to think these for- giving children life and love, pa- tance of "background figures": pose of the orchestra of life which we grow in the grasp of the why of ward thrusts should stop simply tient service and quiet endurance wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, really glorifies the second fiddles? things and the richness of shar- because we have moved from the are rarely noted by historians. The sisters, brothers and friends whose Every note and tone, dominated ing in the intellectual and spiritual first violins section to the second? person who leads a conquering names may not be known to his- by the composer's mind has its es- achievements of our species. Through the many eons of past army into victory is immortalized; tory but upon whose influence the sential place whether one is play- And to realize that even we sec- time we have all contributed to a political leader bringing his/her more visible lives turned crucially ing second or third fiddle or even ond fiddlers can leave behind nour- building a redeemed humanity and country into prominent history is to their destinies. If it had not been waiting in the wings. The one great ished ideas, mentorships, cultural at all ages continue to be invited "beatified." All the while, multi- for the second fiddles, the first fid- question we have to answer is advances and perhaps some ma- as workers in that sacred purpose. tudes of us who make this possible dles would never have been able to whether the purpose for the com- terial prosperity for the support of Tasks that are great and conspicu- are rarely mentioned. Fame, glit- play at all or become the virtuosi mon good of humanity is thriving those who come after us, is deeply ous are assigned to some, and they ter and brilliance are found on the they were destined to be. through love and service? Our own satisfying. deserve our recognition and some upper rungs of the social ladder of Every player in the orchestra of personal ambitions and positions As second fiddlers, sitting in the duties that seem small and unim-

- achievement - but life has other life is important every person is in society matter very little, but the back tiers of the orchestra, it is important are given to others. But treasures equally great, which all unique with individual gifts and earnestness with which we make portant to make clear the ultimate whether tasks given us are great or people, regardless of position or talents, wonderfully varied and our contributions and the fact that disposition of human life. Reflect- small we do them exceedingly well. place, may possess. beautiful. Whatever we are or do, we make that contribution consis- ing on our late stages of life, we In life's work the little one may be- Many of us are second fiddlers and whatever others may think of tent with life's plan and purpose cannot mistake the fact that we come a million and we continue to in the orchestra of life. We happily us, nobody else can be us; nobody - this matters most. use each stage to prepare for the depend on those who may play the reconcile ourselves to occupying else can be you and nobody else Those of us playing second fiddle next. Our formal schooling, em- second fiddle. positions of humble obscurity ex- can be me. We have happened only continue to make regular attempts ployment, marriage, our children, pecting to be names and little more once in this awesome, fiery cosmos to keep in touch with the "noo-os- usually followed the preparation at

- - tenants and tax-payers, produc- and it is this uniqueness which phere" that world of the mind as each former level. Expanding our letters@cordweekly. com 16 Opinion WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 - THE CORD WEEKLY AC neglects students

Renovations at the Atheltics Complex inconvenience while technical problems constantly cause a bother

as Maybe the 2004-2005 improve- of the classes from the dropping of facility that seems to care little of Many malfunctions, such to fitness centre weights above. the comfort or satisfaction of their barbells and dumbbells breaking ments the have us an These renovations have rendered patrons. apart, can be dangerous when they spoiled by creating expec- be tation that the performance of close to one-third of the fitness Since the opening of the new occur during use, but can often equipment and facilities will centre unusable, and have sub- fitness centre, it has been fraught prevented by simply tightening the JEREMY CARNEGIE an on a correspond somehow to its new RAGING RED-HEAD sequently displaced many of the with problems and inconvenienc- them with allan key regular free weights and benches that were es, from a lack of usable barbells - basis. appearance. However, is it an ex- together traordinary request that out-of-or- A few years ago, the fitness centre previously housed there. Although the number actually being reduced All these problems a facility der equipment be fixed within a at the AC underwent renovations. the staffhas attempted to rearrange to three during the winter months, seem to paint a picture of comfortable its month? Is it completely unreason- During this time, anyone want- theroom in order to accommodate while there were six benches and that is completely in to expect that AC staff check ing to use the weights or non-car- the equipment from the space be- one squatrack designed specifical- poor service. After all, poor service able for malfunction on dio machines that were previously ing renovated, much of it has been ly for their use - to pieces of equip- would rarely correlate to a decrease the equipment a basis? Is it too much housed there had to cram into a removed. ment being rendered out-of-order in membership (as the majority of regular to ask a new facility function small squash court and a dance As for whether anything is for months at a time. members are the Laurier student that proper- room, or make the trek to the de- planned to compensate or accom- A much more pressing issue, body). As fourth-year student Louie ly for at least two full years before funct gym at Northdale Campus modate members during this time, however, is the lack of a focus on Dimatteo puts it,"the gym doesn't it has to be repaired again? I don't (which housed a limited selection Roly Webster, Coordinator ofFacili- safety in the facility. An example of seem to be run bypeople who actu- think it is. of "heavy" dumbbells and weights). ties, Events and Sponsorship for the this is the absence of operational ally use it." [email protected] It was a dark time for athletes and Laurier Athletics and Recreation collars (metal clips placed on bars fitness fanatics alike, but it was tol- Department, indicated thatAC staff to prevent the weights from falling erated due to the promise of the see no need to extend hours during off) for barbells. At last count, for brand new facility opening in the "the off-season." He said that staff the five barbells in the fitness cen- fall of 2005. Now in the summer of was able to inform community us- tre, there were four sets of collars 2007 (less than two years after the ers, alumni, faculty and staff of the with two of the four not actually new fitness centre opened), reno- renovations before May 1, when able to adequately perform their vations have begun again, leaving term or year memberships have to stated purpose on the bar I was users with a bitter taste in their be purchased. using. mouths. Communications studies alumni Often, it is not discovered that The current renovation, which Tyson Wentworth disagrees: "No- equipment is broken until it falls began on May 14 and will continue body told me about the renovations apart or fails to operate while in until early June, is intended to im- and I wouldn't have gotten a mem- use. Of course, it is understood that prove soundproofing between the bership had I known about it." equipment often only malfunctions free-weight section of the gym (lo- This is not simply a matter of the during use, but the question has to cated inthe southwest corner ofthe current inconvenience of renova- be asked why fitness centre staff do Sydney Helland fitness centre) and the kinesiology tions, but rather that these renova- not test and check the equipment GYM IN A JAM - Poor service brings down the quality of the AC. labs below, preventing disturbance tions are yet another example of a more often. Letters to the Editor

Give it an F'N the mark. You make F'nM seem like once was a masterpiece in student without. Although many do not care about chance some freakish hierarchy with girls community. the atrocities that happen in the in tutus at the top, proudly sport- I felt very honoured as I was - John Clements world, it is still a worthwhile effort In response to the article, "F'nM ing their competition medals from able to move onto Ezra Avenue to attempt to find those that do care should give a chance to everyone" third grade. It's really not. If you this year. I knew I was moving to a Awareness vital and present them with a situation I would argue instead that "You went to the show I'm sure you saw street that had a legendary history where they can devote their energy should give F'nM a chance." This that many scenes were not techni- and a glamorous reputation. Early This is in response to your article to help the cause. While not all of dance show did indeed bring ev- cally based. I even know of a few in September I set out to find out from last week, entitled "Good rid- those that 'talk the talk walk the eryone together, creating an air- choreographers hired who had no what made Ezra the "party street" dance, WLU." In the most polite walk/ it's cruciallyimportant to find tight bond of girls in tights, fake formal dance training! and I quickly found the reason. It manner possible, let me start by those who are able to do both. This eyelashes, and guys with hilarious And for the record: everyone has was not simply the fact the Ezra is a explaining how ashamed I am, not is the only way change can occur. backstage antics. Perhaps you have the opportunity tolearn dance. I say student ghetto, but rather the mar- only as a Laurier student, but as a If you believe that finding some- decided to remain anonymous be- this because alongside training at a velous invention of thefront porch. human being, to hear how "aware- one to get hammered with is more cause you have made completely dance studio I taught myself from The front porch enabled students to ness" is not one of the things we'll important than informing people invalid claimsregarding the techni- watching others, going to open maintain the comfort of their own miss. As a person who devotes about worldwide injustices, I seri- cal requirements offemale dancers classes, and taking opportunities in house, but still interact with the much ofhis timehelping the home- ously suggest you consider getting during the audition process, which high school. Whining doesn't make street. Students would sit on their less, orphans and less privileged your priorities set straight. As a uni- could in turn damage the positive things happen; getting off the bitter front porch with drinks and inter- in other countries (i.e. California, versity, we should pride ourselves reputation of F'nM. You pose the bus and doing something does. act with their neighbors and pass- USA; Argentina, Uruguay, Venezu- on having a platform where we can question, "What happens when ers-by. I fondly recall students yell- ela), I feel insulted that the 'Student instigate change, not self-absorbed students are denied the opportu- - MarieLaramee ing through megaphones to their Life Staff' would place a higher im- individuals who pride themselves nity to participate solely because neighbors to come and get tanked. portance on things such as "Always on consuming pizza-and-pitcher they'd already missed out on previ- The Death of When the parties became larger having someone to drink with" over deals. ous opportunities?" Nobody ever the street was informally closed off, awareness issues. If "awareness" told us info sessions, at the Ezra Avenue and in in- the masses would spill onto were such a problem, why would - GiladCohen terview, or at the audition, "Leave the streets. Walking down Ezra on you bother including articles on the gym ifyou can't do 20 back flips Recently, I stared in dismay as I a Friday night in September was a Stephen Lewis, an individual who [email protected] and kick yourself in the face." There watched the demolition of four remarkable sight, a genuine experi- devotes his entire career to raising was no prerequisite for female houses at the tail end of Ezra Av- ence in culture. awareness on important issues? dancers to audition. Perhaps it was enue. The demolition crews were But alas, this is all coming to an Why would you bother mention- Letters Policy: easier to actually HIRE "dancers" clearing the way for yet another end. These houses and their porch- my ing name in last week's article All tetters to the editor must be signed and because they have the discipline apartment building. These bland, es, these remarkable venues of stu- on Mykola Vlasov, where my main submitted with the author's name, student identification number, and telephone number. needed to come to everyrehearsal, life-killing, money-making build- dent are gatherings, being knocked goals were to raise awareness on his Letters must be received by 12:00 pm (noon) can take risks in choreography, and ings have been sprouting up on down for more profitable apart- disappearance and present aware- Monday via email to [email protected] or through our website at www.cordweekly. are comfortable onstage. Ezra on ment - like dandelions my front buildings buildings that, ness to his family that the Laurier com. Letters must not exceed 350 words. I also find your overdramatic lawn. I can only guess how long it while nice on the inside, destroy community cares? You claim that The Cord reserves the right edit any letter for sentence, about before falls vic- to clincher "its peo- will be my house community. Ezra is now a shadow the main problem is the lack of brevity and clarity. The Cord reserves the right ple who share a common passion tim to the development guillotine, of its former self. While the parties energy the Laurier community to reject any letter, in whole or in part,TheCord is reserves right publish that and the to not material coming together, working hard as landlords seem bent on secur- sometimes became too rowdy, Ezra devoting to solving the problem, is deemed to be libelous or in contravention journalistic having fun; it's not about elitist ex- ing themselves a good retirement provides a true experience that no but how can one with the Cord's Code of Ethics or solve a problem standards. clusion practices" to be quite off and care little for the death of what student should go through school if he/she is unaware of the issue? The Cord Weekly > Wednesday may 30,2007 Classifieds/Fun . 17

CROSSWORD By Krystian Imgrum The Ontarion, Special to CUP (U of Guelph)

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WCRI: A whole wiew may to live together! 18 A&E WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY K-W theatre gets intimate Twelfth Night Intimate Exchanges

Waterloo does Shakespeare with a student - and musical - twist Theatre and Company's season ender wins

CARRIE MCNABB Theatre joined forces with UW Dra- drama veteran, Brad Cook, receives PAUL ALVIZ STAFF WRITER ma to stage Twelfth Night from May laughs from his physical com- A&E EDITOR 10to 12 at the Theatre oftheArts on edy and his character's simple wit. Director: Alan K. Sapp UW's campus. Director Alan Sapp Kathleen Sheehy toyed with gen- Director: Leah Cherniak Starring: Andrew Lakin, Kathleen attempted to set his show apart der expectations to play the crude, Starring: Kerry Ann Doherty and Sheehy from others by integrating original drunkard Sir Toby Belch, and had Paul Braunstein Performed May 10-12. music designed just for the show. the audience absolutely convinced On until June 3, call 519-571-0928 This gave it a contemporary flair as that she was no sweet ingenue, but If you ask any high school student, it departed from traditional Shake- a crass, sexualized, drunken old It was a bit of an unusual night at they will tell you that Shakespeare spearean boundaries. man. Kitchener's King Street Theatre and fun are certainly not synony- Music director Meghan Bunce In a part that lends itself to Centre, something not uncommon mous. In fact, they may go so far as composed the entire score in what great physical comedy, Andrew for the small, audacious venue. to say that Shakespeare is not cool; is certainly a grand achievement Lakin stole the show as one of Theatre and Company's produc- in fact, he's pretty lame. in her music career. It includes the Shakespeare's most infamous and tion ofIntimate Exchanges is some- But this is where Twelfth Night medley for several songs sung by memorable characters, Malvolio what ofa tour de force for actors at- turns the tide. Twelfth Night is one Feste the clown (Michael Albert), the puritan. When Lakin waltzed tempting the behemoth of a script of the more popular plays to per- and the music for a short move- onto the stage in his yellow cross- from writer Alan Ayckbourn. In to- form, because anyone can produce mentpiece involving the entire cast, gartered stockings, there was not tal, all of the scenes comprising the this show (amateur or professional which precedes the play. Bunce is one dry eye in the house - it was script can run for a full seventeen

- with or without a budget) and it no stranger to music composition, nothing short of a miracle that the hours. But don't worry, Theatre and is relatively easy for modern audi- studying that very subject here at contagious eruption oflaughter did Company won't strap you into your ences to understand and relate to. WLU; she also directed an opera- not spread onstage to Lakin's stoic seats and take you hostage. In fact Where many of Shakespeare's musical for this past year's Fringe face. the seats encircle three sides of the comedies have become unpopular Festival based on Robert Munsch's Although this is the first joint stage, making for a close "intimate" due to the lack of relevance to to- Mortimer. production by UW Drama and Lost environment. Not to mention that day's issues, such as The Merchant Wonderful performances were and Found Theatre, it surely can't there isn't a bad seat in the house. of Venice and its clear anti-Semitic given by the entire cast, most no- be the last. According to the Lost Each night the show runs, there values, Twelfth Night's theme of un- tably UW drama veteran Michelle and Found blog, Sapp hopes "to are a series ofpaths which the story requited love has managed to stay Jedrzejewski, as the striking Viola help bridge the gap between the can twist and turn down, alternat- popular with audiences through- and her masculine alter-ego Ce- academic and the professional" ing the storyline itself, and ulti- out the years. But from this comes sario. Jedrzejewski captures the with this production, giving both mately the ending. A live-action- a slight problem: how can a theatre all-too-familiar pain associated students and professionals the choose-your-own-adventure story, company differentiate their pro- with unrequited love and without chance to learn something from if you will. An intriguing prospect, duction from the countless others? a doubt captures the hearts of the theirpeers. although it makes for a potentially

Easily - with the addition of a little audience. precarious review. spice known as music. The gullible Sir Andrew Despite the inherent unpredict- Contributed Photo Kitchener-based Lost & Found Aguecheek, played by another UW able outcome of the complete sto- of a collage of naturalistic panels in ry, there are a few structures which the background, with a few doors the play follows. It's comprised of that triple as a house, park and four separate scenes: one each in church. The stage is home to cylin- the present (the year 1982, when drical objects that are tables, rocks the script was written), five days and plants intermittently. later, five, weeks later, and finally This particular version of the five years later. show concluded with a funeral, al- In each scene a character is faced though some nights it ends with a- with a choice, at which point a blue wedding or Easter. A second view- light engulfs the stage accompanied ing of the show is half price with a by some übiquitous elevator mu- ticket stub from your first viewing. sic, until a decision is arrived upon. Check out Intimate Exchanges for The choice made ultimately affects an unpredictable night. all the following scenes and range of options for the story to develop. Intimate Exchanges is a British King Street Theatre Company farce, poking fun at the lust, deceit opens its doors and melancholy brought about by close relationships. The show All actors in the region should features six lively, archetypal char- keep their schedules open for acters, played seamlessly by only June 18 and 19, when the theatre two actors, without discrepancy or will be holding general auditions. confusion as to who's who. A quick The Company's new artistic di- change in costume and the actors' rector, Daryl Cloran, is excited to keen grasp of facial expression, see the talent that springs forth body language and dialect let the from a simmering, theatrically audience know clearly which char- enthusiastic place like K-W. acter is on stage. Along with the new Director The main characters are a lovable of Development and Marketing alcoholic schoolmaster, his anxious Cheryl Ewing, Cloran is hoping and repressed wife, their scraggly, to see Theatre and Company hormonal teenage housekeeper, take a more serious dive into the and a boorish sexpot of a gardener. art of theatre, and offer perfor- The too smooth, innuendo-ridden mances that challenge the com- speech ofthe gardener in particular munity. King StreetTheatre Cen- had the audience in stiches much tre, the physical home to Theatre of the time. Tension, attraction and and Company, can be rented hilarity ensue as these characters out to other performing compa- Contributed Photo face sometimes simple — and oth- nies, increasing the prospects of

er times moral — SOME WINE WITH YOUR UNREQUITED LOVE? - Lovers share drinks and tales in UW's Twelfth Night. dilemmas. a greater variety of shows in the With only two actors portraying area. six characters, the set is made up The Cord Weekly ■ Wednesday may 30,2007 A&E. 19 A fellowship of funny The Perry Bible Fellowship's creator gives his take on surrealism, revolution, and giant"mutant hero"rats with extra limbs

- FROM COMIC, BACK COVER

A lot ofpeople comment that PBF is "fucked up." Gurewitch expands on the notion of surrealisism. "I really enjoy the idea of a revolution. I love it when chaotic things happen." And chaotic things do happen, as a matter of course, in the comics. Things like unicorns who im- pale schoolyard bullies, "mutant heroes" turning out to be giant rats with extra limbs, and a group of recurring characters who look like barbarian slug aliens. "I think the magic ofthose guys is that they're simultaneously reptil- ian, mammalian, intellectual, and yet disastrously low-brow. I think Used with permission their fundamental characteristic IGNORANCE IS BLISS - Sgt. Grumbles is content in a fan favourite from the PBF comic strip drawn by artist Nicholas Gurewitch. is that of a fraternity brother," says Gurewitch. Another was made entirely in pix- to prove that the public can handle crack rocks ofpure, silly joy. On the and Hobbes, Gurewitch invokes PBF is unusual as an online strip, els, as opposed to his usual pencil jokes that "go there" internet, the humble comic strip the spooky philosophy we're used perhaps, in that Gurewitch main- and paper approach. Webcomics cover a wide range is flourishing, and has been since to seeing in Larson's single panel tains the traditional format of three For comic strips, breaking of artistic styles as well as a wide the 19905. Today, there are thou- jokes, or coming from the mouth or four panels, aligned horizontally, through the print industry can be range of content. Everything from sands of them, a number of which of a stuffed cat. Readers who are with the punchline or image found harder than teaching a cat to fetch. manga to clip art, scribbles to beau- are hugely popular and are bound easily offended may shy away, but in the final panel. His art is colour- Syndicates put boundaries not just tifulart, and everything in-between to show up in culture as much as those appreciative of Gurewitch's ful and eye-catching, although he on the art, but on the content. On can be found in this medium. As far classic print comics like Peanuts or firm grasp ofwit and irony are chal- demonstrates his skill as an artist the internet however, there are no as content is concerned, there is a Calvin and Hobbes. lenged to leave without a smile on by changing the style for a number restrictions - not for space, not for comic for everyone: from science PBF comics challenge, question thier face. ofhis strips. One is done, for exam- content, not for traditions. It's the puns to the life of a scenester, and and entertainat the same time. Be- The Perry Bible Fellowship can ple, in the style of Edward Gorey. perfect forum for a strip like PBF from dark or even tragic humour to ing a fan of The Far Side and Calvin be read at www.pbfcomics.com

C \ Cord/Online Ogre epic gets overdone > cordweekly.com >Arts & Entertainment Shrek the Third runs like a broken record that won't stop spinning, no matter how much it needs to Pirates ahoy WENDY NIND Shrek series to a T, the only issue overdone. It's unfortunate that bination of great comedy and the Pirates' final voyage leaves STAFF WRITER there are just too there seems to be much that there being that many too action, feeling is just too much the trilogy on a high note, ofthem. too many characters, too many plot going on to concentrate on any one albeit not so final, says Kari Usually film sequels fall in one of It's easy to discredit sequels, and lines and too many anti-cliches. thing in particular. Pritchard. two categories: they attempt to this film certainly doesn't deserve a Though it is normal to expect Still, while it's easy to find fault, be too different from the original, bad rap, but there are many faults a poor acting job from a singer- there are definitely some good or they go overboard and use too that could have been easily avoided turned-actor, Justin Timberlake's laughs. LP's new direction many of the same jokes and plot in this third installment of the ogre half-assed portrayal of Arthur in Though you might want to wait Mike Brown takes a stab at sequences from the earlier films. epic. the film isn't entirely his fault. His for the DVD to come out, it's still Linkin Park after they take Shrek the Third fits easily into the The film begins with the death character is supposed to give the worth a look. a stab at reinventing them- latter category; the jokes fit the of the Frog King of Far Far Away, depth, but the little amount of film selves - to a bittersweet end. which leads to Shrek's search for time that is spent on developing his Princess Fiona's cousin Arthur - the story just feels too uninspired. V J next heir to the throne. The problem is that it isn't pos- Meanwhile, the evil Prince sible to create enough emotion Charming gathers an army of fairy behind his character without the tale villains to overtake the king- movie being too serious, but the dom and becomes king in Shrek's bits they try to add don't fit well absence. In the midst of the may- with the comedy, and so they end hem, Shrek tries to come to terms up sticking out and being tedious. with becoming a father and the In addition to Arthur, Shrek the fairy tale world is turned around to Third introduces many great new reveal princesses with power and characters to Far Far Away, includ- villains with heart. ing Merlin, Snow White and Sleep- There are plenty of adult jokes to ing Beauty. Unfortunately, their relish, as well as the silly stuff that's roles are undermined by a lack of great for everyone to enjoy. The screen time to expand on their po- overall plot of the film is focused tentially hilarious roles. mostly on Shrek and his journey to- Similarly, older characters that ward becoming a father, which is a added a great deal of depth to Shrek nice way to top off the trio of films, 2, like Queen Lillian and Puss in but it makes it a litdeless accessible Boots, are either poorly written into for youth and young adults. One of the story or have only minor parts. the pluses in the first two films is Julie Andrews' talent goes to waste, that they managed to make great and a plot twist involving Puss in movies that seemed both refresh- Boots and Donkey justoverwhelms ing and effordess. the already jam-packedtale. Regrettably, Shrek the Third is Simply put, Shrek the Third uses Contributed Photo

jammed full of constant action that too much of its own medicine, INFAMOUS GREEN MUG - Friendships are tested in Shrek the Third. it seems forced and sometimes which leaves it with an odd com- 20 .A&E WEDNESDAY MAY 30,2007 ■ THE CORD WEEKLY Plaskett packs punch The Joel Plaskett Emergency pumps infectious, Canadian rock into Waterloo's Starlight Lounge

NOWHERE WITH YOU - Far from going nowhere, Canadian rock sensation Joel Plaskett has built a reputation for heavy touring, especially within his beloved home and native land.

BRIAN WEADICK an ample amount of energy to plosion of the early 19905, over the Band, but equally evoked Cana- ing Plaskett's songs to shine, with a CORD A&E persuade the receptive Waterloo years Plaskett has accumulated a dian patriotism as he referenced little flair for show. The evening had crowd to sing along on almost ev- number of dedicated fans, result- Kelowna, 8.C., numerous Maritime a distinct feeling of a house party For Waterloo's busiest street, it is ery song. With fists and drinks in ing in a mixed audience of teenage locations, as well as Toronto and with a perfect soundtrack to dance definitely the season for filled pa- the air, the Starlight heard Plaskett youth and thirty-somethings last Montreal, in "Work Out Fine," off of and sing to. Plaskett played the tios, busy sidewalks, and for the play a diverse set, ranging from Thursday. Distinctively Can-Rock, 2004's Truthfully Truthfully. experienced showman, working Steve Miller Band to be played 1999's In Need ofMedical Attention Plaskett's passion and presence Plaskett's stylings are classically hard to entertainand get the crowd loudly from car windows. In this to the recendy-released Ashtray was a testament to years of tour- familiar, doing nothing less tra- interested, and he was without a town, summertimecalls for earnest Rock (2007). ing the country as a solo artist, as ditional rock and roll. Riff happy doubt successful in doing so, as few 1970s rock and roll to accompany His material covered a wide well as with former band Thrush rock songs brought to mind Led concerts in recent memory were frothy cold beers as the party gets range of themes, from bizarre love Hermit. Zeppelin (albeit with an enthusias- as energetic as this one. As Cana- started. Last Thursday night, the triangles and teenage 'bromance; Towing the line between sing- tic small town Canuck on vocals), dians seem to love nothing more Joel Plaskett Emergency provided to small town devotion and higher-songwriter and indie rock, the while others sounded much more than hearing rock bands sing about such inspired rock, as the filled-to- way traveling stories. Such a di- melody-driven anthems of Plaskett pop oriented in the vein of Big Star. Canada in the summer, The loel capacity Starlight Lounge danced verse song book led to a long night appeased both young and older A well-rounded backing band Plaskett Emergency's performance and drank into the early morning. of entertainment by the humble concert goers. Plaskett at times provided bass, drums, and piano, Thursday was a great way to kick off Nearing the end of yet another boyish demeanor of Plaskett, and evoked the sentiments of a full with guest spots for saxophone this years summer music season. cross-Canada tour, the 32-year-old his 'Emergency' band. 'Americana' sounding band, such and harmonica. The band's set-up Plaskett and his band mustered A veteran of the Halifax Pop Ex- as Bruce Springsteen's E Street permitted a focused agenda, allow- The most comic ofonline comics The Cord speaks with Nicholas Gurewitch of the Perry Bible Fellowship comic strip, a world-wide comedy success story

PAUL ALVIZ home in NewYork. "It's so much fun ing larger and more loyal than the with childlike whimsy or absurdist read them often isn't enough. "I A&E EDITOR to see the levy break sometimes." artist ever anticipated. puns. like that," said Gurewitch. "I'm glad Although known internation- His humour is sometimes dark, And yet each illustration manag- that you can do that. Because I do

ESTHER WHEATON ally by its online home, the PBF with tragedy employed as a co- es to maintainits comic merit — al- that myself. I think Iread the comic CORD A&E is printed in over 30 publications medic device. There is nothing he though some strips take a few read- a thousand times before I actually (like the Rochester Insider, the won't joke about, including reli- ings to sink in. There is so much time make it." There is no better example of the New York Press, and the UK's daily gion, sexuality, suicide, violence, put into the comics that the short interweb reviving a medium than Guardian), and has found a follow- and misogyny, often juxtaposed five-second time frame it takes to - SEE COMIC, PAGE 19 comic strips. (Well - besides porn.) The Perry Bible Fellowship, drawn by Nicholas Gurewitch, is a weekly comic, and is certainly not to be confused with anything religious. The name is something of a signifier of what to expect, in the sense that it finds itself completely misplaced within the comics. A common theme throughout is the displacement ofthe regular. "I don't necessarily want to bring down a government or destroy anything, but there's a lot to be saidfor chaos where order is making things very, very boring," says Gurewitch in a telephone interview from his