LIGHTING LIVES FOR THE SAKE OF OUR CHILDREN TRUST Official Newsletter February/March 2009

ABOUT US: True and long lasting solutions

Trust Vision Statement The 2008 Annual Report of ‘It takes a family to the Officer of the Children’s raise a child and failing It is our vision to Commissioner provides for that, a village to protect some alarming reading. them’ Light One Life at a Time

– establishing a movement of positive change for New The report shows that since While For the Sake of our Zealand. 2000 more than 350 children Children recognise that whose safety or welfare had many CYF officials working To change the ‘heart’ of our been brought to the attention at a grass roots level are nation, For the Sake of Our of Child Youth and Family hard working, and do all failing that, a village to pro- Children Trust (FSOCT) have died. 86 in the last year they can with the resources tect them . alone. Not all of these deaths they are given, this report Trust Mission Statement were due to abuse or ne- clearly shows there is much Ronald Regan once noted, To raise awareness and advo- glect, some died of natural room for improvement. Fur- ‘Families must continue to cate for the establishment of causes, some in accidents, ther and more importantly be the foundation of our FSOCT principles throughout some for medical reasons this report highlights again nation. Families – not gov- to achieve a and some chose tragically to the continued disintegration ernment programs – are the child-friendly New Zealand take their own lives. An- of the family unit, and the best way to make sure our through strong families, reduc- other very concerning fact is need for communities, as children are properly nur- ing child violence and eliminat- that most children who die groups of people living to- tured, our elderly are cared ing child-poverty. as a result of homicide or gether, connected by geogra- for, our cultural and spiritual To influence a nation who will deliberate violence are aged phy at least, and more often heritages perpetuated, our demand an action of positive under the age of five, and than not by schools, clubs laws are observed and our change by our elected repre- are unknown to CYF offi- and common interests, to values are preserved. Thus it sentatives to develop social cials. take responsibility for caring is imperative that our gov- policies that better reflect for each other. It takes a ernment’s programs, actions, FSOOCT principles. Which ever way you look at family to raise a child and officials and social welfare these statistics they are truly institutions never be allowed To work in partnership with key tragic. to jeopardize the family. We change agents within commu- nities to build up young leaders fear the government may be to become individuals of influ- powerful enough to destroy ence. RECENT our families; we know that it is not powerful enough to HAPPENINGS... replace them’ (cont. page 2)

Community Leadership Gap Homes For the Sake of Our Children Trust hopes to influence the nation and its treat- CONTACT US 'For the Sake of Our Children' Trust ment of our children. This will be achieved, in part by building up young PO Box 12301 leaders to live and serve together becoming aware of their potential for influ- Penrose Auckland ence in their communities. SO... New Zealand Auckland Phone: +64 (09) 579 3208 We are pleased to announce the opening of the Elliot Bateman Discipleship Fax: +64 (09) 579 3407 House in Auckland. The house will be used for a Global Gap Year pro- gramme designed to allow young leaders to develop their full potential while Email: [email protected] living and serving in the Beach Haven community. Cont page 2…

WWW.LIGHTONELIFE.ORG.NZ FOR THE SAKE OF OUR CHILDREN TRUST Official Newsletter February/March 2009

...cont page 1. A WORD FROM OUR FOUNDER: The programme is designed to challenge and transform its participants through leadership ministry overseas, working with individuals struggling with drug/alcohol addictions, and working closely with a range of experi- enced practitioners to develop key relational and leadership skills.

Rachel, our Trust Project Manager, attended the opening says: “the day was beautiful and the spirit of community leadership was clearly evident and contagious amongst those who were present.” If you know anyone who would be interested in being part of the Global Gap Year programme please contact Captain Peter Lloyd or Reverend Lorraine Lloyd of Birkdale Beach Dear friends, Haven Anglican Community Church for further information. email: [email protected] or Tel: 09 483 6989. As usual 2009 is shaping up to be a busy and event- ful year. With a new gov- ernment in place, the cur- rent economic outlook and the hopeful success of the Black Caps - it will be a tumultuous one at that!

For the Sake of Our Chil- Above : Rachel, Bishop John Paterson, Above: Bateman-Elliot Discipleship Home and ‘official opening dren continues to be com- Rev. Lorraine Lloyd & Capt. Peter Lloyd mitted to the same princi- Tauranga ples upon which it was founded three years ago— The Trust is looking into beginning a community home in Tauranga. We that every child is pre- hope for it to open in April 2009. The home will be open to 6 local young cious and deserves safety, people who will spend a year being intentional about living lives of service love and care. We will and integrity as well as focusing of serving in the local community. The cho- continue over the coming sen young leaders will also attend leadership forums and network with other year to look for solutions and explore the implica- young people across NZ in similar community homes. For more informa- tions of attempting to tion please contact our office. speak on behalf of those who cannot speak for Cont. from page 1 ‘True and long lasting solutions’ themselves. Children often point the finger and find three pointing back at them. We too should recognise that rather than pointing the finger and asking what more the government can do to fix this We hope you will join us. problem, this report should challenge us to realise true and long lasting solutions are found Aroha-nui in meaningful and strong relationships; marriages of lasting commitment; families where John Sax children are loved and protected, and where those who may not be so fortunate are able to be loved, encouraged and inspired within their environment. Lindsay Price

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Ongoing DIALOGUE needed….. It’s a very tricky subject, steeped in history and often historical story telling. However, it is an issue that we must say something on, rather than say nothing at all. We cannot let the po- litically correct, talk us into silence. We must continue to talk openly and courageously be- cause what we ignore remains the same. Maori people, tradition and language have under- gone a renaissance and this can only be positive but how can we ignore the shocking statisti- cal reality - Maori and Pasifika children have been drastically over represented in child abuse cases yet proportional figures show a sharp rate increase with Asian children in this area. Maori children are three times more likely to die due to abuse and neglect than (Cont. pg 3).

WWW.LIGHTONELIFE.ORG.NZ FOR THE SAKE OF OUR CHILDREN TRUST Official Newsletter February/March 2009

Introducing non– Maori children. For the Sake of Our Children are pleased to hear that Paora Maxwell is WHO WE ARE… leading the charge with dialogue and amongst communities, media and government.

Communication, consultation and action are imperative. Rachel Afeaki- Taumoepeau has been We look forward to reporting further on the progress and outcomes of this discussion. We are working as the Trust’s Pro- hopeful about being part of this and any discussion happening across NZ. We encourage you to engage also and let us know what’s happening around your community. ject Manager since March

2007. She is responsible for Who is Paora Maxwell? coordinating the numerous projects within the Trust. Paora Maxwell took up the position of Manager of TVNZ’s Maori and Pa- Rachel has experience in cific Programmes in mid 2008. Prior to this Mr Maxwell was a former Chair- instigating business opera- man of Nga Aho Whakaari, the industry body representing Maori independ- tional systems for numerous ent producers, and has been a long-serving Board member of Te Putahi NGOs and small businesses. Paaho, the Maori Electoral College which set up the Maori Television Ser- She brings a wealth of ex- vice. Further, he is passionate about stopping family violence in New Zea- perience as well as innova- land and is a trustee of Te Kahui Mana Ririki, a trust established to also ad- vocate for the needs and voices of children. tion and enthusiasm required by this role.

Trustees: Children’s Day - Sunday March 1st 2009

In 1954 the United Nations called for countries around the world to institute a day that cele- Dr. Muriel Newman is the brated children, this Sunday - March 1st marks New Zealand’s 9th annual celebrations of Chil- founder and Director of the dren’s Day; a day designated to recognising the importance of our tamariki, our children, to New Zealand Centre for Po- ‘celebrate, nurture and treasure’. litical Research (www.nzcpr.com). She was At For the Sake of our Children we celebrate and commend those who have worked to raise a Member of Parliament for awareness of this day, taking the time to organise an event in their community highlighting the ACT New Zealand from needs of children. We believe every day should be a ‘child focussed day’. Whether working as a 1996-2005 and has Doctor- mother in her home, teaching in the classroom, or walking the halls of Parliament, all of us ate in Mathematics Educa- should seek to make choices to best enhance the lives and needs of society’s most vulnerable members. tion from Rutgers Univer- sity, New Jersey, USA. The theme for 2009 Children’s Day is ‘Listening and Talking’. Mark Woodward the Chair of the National Children’s Day Steering Group says ‘Listening and talking are important for raising Hon. Roger McClay has happy, healthy and vibrant children, this is because listening and talking to children underpins worked in education, poli- their social emotional and cognitive development’. tics, child advocacy, busi- ness as well as general advi- Sadly however, many children across New Zealand will not be attending a Children’s Day Cele- sory work. He is currently bration, nor will they be spoken to in a loving way, or have their feelings and opinions listened the government/education too. These are children who may have been separated from their parents and families, children liaison for World Vision NZ who may have been abused and neglected by those who should protect and care for them. They may even be hungry and lonely. One kiwi kid who finds themselves in this situation is one too and Heart Children NZ, hav- many. ing come from a term as a political advisor in Parlia- This Children’s Day, as a Nation together let’s love our tamariki. Love the children in your life ment and 5 years as New who are in need. Find a child who lacks a role model, and become their friend. Let this day Zealand's Commissioner for (actually every other day!) challenge you to take time to remember those less fortunate, to put a Children. face and a name to the unloved, and uncared for. Societies are changed by individuals who rec- ognise they are their brother’s keeper. Societies will be judged by how they love and protect NEW WEB SITE those most vulnerable. Which brother or sister will you keep? What is their name? We challenge COMING SOON… you to make a difference. Go for it! Lindsay Price

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Introducing THFOR THE SAKE OF OUR CHILDREN TRUST How many of these are true for you? WHO WE ARE…

Trustees (cont) 17 KEYS TO PEACEFUL PARENTING Angus Fletcher has had a long career in business prin- cipally with Fletcher Hold- 1. Peace begins with me. ings and then with Fletcher Challenge. He also brings 2. I have made my home a place of kind words. experience through his long- standing involvement in a 3. I catch my children in the act of positive behaviours and praise them immedi- wide variety of ‘not for ately, specifically and sincerely. profit’ community based organizations, involving 4. I spend at least 20 minutes a day with each child, listening, interacting, and giv- many education initiatives. ing my full attention.

A huge thank you 5. I am clear on the standards of behaviour I expect of my children. I honour those and farewell to... standards and expect my children to do the same.

Christine Rankin (CEO 6. I provide my children with empty spaces of time during which they can just “be and Trustee) and Bev kids.” Adair (EA and Events) who, after 3 years of 7. I hold regularly scheduled family meetings where my children have a voice in working tirelessly to raise the workings of our family. awareness of the reality of child abuse in New Zea- 8. I have set a foundation for peacefulness in our home by creating with my chil- land, have stepped down dren “Guidelines/Tikanga for a Peaceful Whanau/Family.” from their positions with the Trust. We would like 9. I always remember that I am the parent and deserve to be listened to. to thank both Christine and Bev for their sterling 10. I have fair, reasonable consequences for negative behaviours which I only use contribution to the mis- when necessary. sion of the Trust and we wish them all the best 11. I listen with all my heart to what my children have to say, and teach them to be with the future. good listeners for others.

12. I teach my children how to handle anger in nondestructive ways and I model this consistently.

13. I find ways to help my children succeed.

14. All my actions are guided by love, compassion, fairness, respect, and integrity. I nurture these attributes in my children.

15. I remember daily that we each had an impact on the world around us and I teach this to my children.

ISource: www.tmav.org (30/11/08) DREN TRUST

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