s?

11 January 2002 ^$08$$ ThThei Student Newspaper for Imperial College Issue 1223 Te

Jarvis again? Well it's

and William Boyd's Pulp's on page 16 ©i pap IS

Teddington Under Threat

Teddington, the favoured sports field of time, a firm of planning consultants was the average medic, is in great danger of appointed to investigate how planning being sold, a recent confidential College permission could be secured for document has suggested. This possibility Teddington, despite the anticipated oppo- has been the subject of rumours for years, sition from Richmond Council, the local but the document has indicated that IC residents and sports governing bodies will submit an application for residential such as Sports England and the National planning permission in "the early part of Playing Fields Trust. Although the results 2002". However, we cannot find any evi- :?%Mall -f fiiJi fflMBP -' of the review are not yet known to stu- dence that this has taken place yet. dents, the College Strategic Plan has out- The sports ground at Teddington was lined that they will sell one of the sports given to the St. Mary's Hospital Medical The Pavillion at Teddington field over the course of the next two years, School (SMHMS) as a gift by Lord and while Teddington is not explicitly Beaverbrook in 1935, to show his grati- date all of the outdoor sports require- mentioned in relation to this, a later part of tude for medical treatment he had ments for IC. However, although this may the plan states that it is "under review", received, but since the merger of Imperial sound attractive, it is not known whether while all the other major sports areas will College and SMHMS in 1989, it has a suitable ground has been identified. A be kept for continuing use. One interest- become the property of College. review was initiated eight months ago to ing point is that this is expected to gener- A few years ago, a review of sports facil- assess how each of the outdoor sports ate only £4 million, where it has been sug- ities, conducted by Frank Murray, demon- grounds could best be utilised and in an gested that the ground should generate strated that IC had an excess of outdoor article for the ICSM Gazette, Neil Mosley, something in the region of £20 million, but sports grounds in proportion to its require- The Sports and Leisure Manager, stated continued on page 2 ments, whether this allows for separate that no decisions would be made regard- CCU teams or not is not known. Ideally, ing the future of the sports grounds until College would like to find one centrally the results of this review were published. located ground, which would accommo- However, it is also known that, at this

"No appeal is complete without a few bazaars and jumble sale type events.

Ilk. j^MW* Or a nice white elephant. college news

continued from front page Gardens. This same part of the It is anticipated that a public 4- Fklix was unable to obtain any plan also suggest that college enquiry will be called before comments from senior sources hope to have 'disposed of planning permission is grant- Issue 1223 on this seeming discrepancy. Teddington by the middle of ed, at which time local resi- In the central sports strate- this year. Nonetheless dents and students can view 11 January 2002 gy, IC aims to provide suffi- Felix has been assured that the the proposals and voice their cient sporting facilities for stu- new sports hall project will go opinions, but there is no way of Editor: will Dugdale dents and staff, in order to pro- ahead, while it remains uncer- predicting when this will be Deputy Editor: Ali Wren mote participation and sport- tain where this capital will until the planning application News: Vacant ing excellence, since many come from if no sale is made. is submitted. Music: Dave Edwards students and college members Without planning permis- Unsurprisingly, most medics Books: Jon Matthews believe that at the current time sion for the ground itself, the are upset by the proposals. Arts: Jon Brenner our sports facilities are inferior sale would not really be worth Aside from the question of 70 Film: Darius Nikbin to those of our major institu- the effort and controversy, but years of tradition, the major Sports: Vacant tional competitors. whether they will get permis- argument against the develop- Crossword: Dr. Hot Fudge Initially, it was thought that sion remains to be seen. ment of these grounds is the money would be re-diverted Richmond Council regard this superior quality of the land, With Thanks To: back in to the college sports sports field as "land of town- Teddington being regarded as Joe facilities, by providing the final scape importance" which is one of the best sports pitches balance for the extension of therefore to be preserved and in the South of England. Felix, Beit Quad, Prince the Sports Centre at Princes the local residents are certain On the other side of the coin, Consort Road, London, Gardens. However, the College to object to the development. however, the money that will SW7 2BB Strategic Plan may suggest However, it is thought that, to be generated from the sale of Tel: 020 7594 8072 otherwise, mentioning minimise this, the develop- this site is proposed to go into Email: [email protected] Teddington in an area of the ment will only consume part of the construction of an exten- Printed by: MCP Litho Limited report that is completely unre- the sports field for housing, sion to the current sports hall Felix is a registered lated to sport: the building of leaving an open recreational in Prince's Gardens improving newspaper: ISSN 1040 - 0711 new residential buildings on area which will be available for the quality of the indoor sports Copyright © Felix 2001 the tennis courts in Prince's public use. facilities of IC. will

Rector's Speech II

The rector has announced that these needs are met from the he will be giving another point of view of welfare, and speech to the students of this will also benefit College Imperial College some time in by making Imperial more the next few weeks. attractive to future students. The plan is to highlight his Other topics may be more vision for the future of this uni- specific to the way that our versity, and he will therefore Union itself is run, as the rec- be discussing matters that are tor is expected to explain the important to the students, as new faculty system in more well as talking about the busi- detail. He will therefore proba- The Union Advice Centre ness of running College from a bly be asked to comment on The Union offers a free, confidential and impartial more bureaucratic point of the impact this has on the professional advice service for students and staff on view. Constituent College Unions, legal, academic, financial, housing, immigration, and benefits questions through the full-time Advisor based although the final decisions on The topic that is likely to be in the Union Advice Centre. this subject will be the of most interest to students is Further information is also available on other that of the need for student Union's. questions concerning health, drugs, alcohol, tax and support and services. These Finally the topics of student rights from a wide range of leaflets in the are obviously fundamental to Intellectual Property Rights Advice Centre reception. any university, since they deal and the capital plan will be Drop by the East Wing of the Union , imnp,rjn| specifically with the students raised, giving students further Building in Beit Quad, or phone « i <~oMeae themselves, and it is recog- information on the college's directly for an appointment on: * union nised that it is important that plans for the future. will (020) 7594 8067. ADVICE CENTRE world news

Blair - Peacemaker?

British Prime Minister Tony independence to Britain's for- Blair this week visited a string mer colonies in the Indian sub- of countries in the Middle East continent. in an effort to boost peace ini- Then the two countries were tiatives in the region. still essentially populus yet The Premier visited Kabul primitive backwaters. But and Bagram in Afghanistan, now both have nuclear as well as India and Pakistan. weapons and large armies. He also expressed the Both sides currently field "gravest concern" at the Arab forces of around three-quar- Israeli situation, where ters of a million men, arrayed Palestinian Yasser Arafat is across an 80-kilometers struggling to maintain disci- stretch of border. pline within the various Blair spent the week shut- Palestinian resistance organi- resume until violence stopped of terrorism". In the statement tling frantically between Delhi sations that fall under his - while simultaneously insist- - the closest yet to a public call and Karachi, where Britain is umbrella. ing that "police action" in the for peace in the reigon - the still held in high regard. At the time of going to print, disputed Gaza region would world leaders also insisted While spectators have 36 Arab civilians have been continue as and when security that peace was possible on accused Blair of pursuing a killed by the Israeli security Israeli security forces deemed the disputed Indian border place in the history books at forces in reprisal for 5 Israeli it necessary. province of Kashmir. the expense of dealing with citizens dead over the past Meanwhile, in a news con- The area (which is principal- domestic strife, he insisted week. ference following talks with ly Muslim, like Pakistan) has that British home policy is Prime Minister Ariel Sharon Blair, Pakistani President been hotly contested by both best served by international of Israel insisted, however, Musharraf announced that his countries since 1947 - when an peace. that peace talks could not government "rejects all forms Act of Parliament granted Joe

imperial college union Snippets Fn>_ CATERING "IB!? Argentina seventh richest country in the Argentina is walking a knife world, but now falls behind edge between growth and Brasil, Peru and French Guiana recession, Reuters reported in the region. this week. On Monday the South Milosovic American country finally made Former Serbian leader the switch from dollars to Slobodan Milosovic stands pesos, in an effort to boost trial next week on charges of signs of a recovery in the coun- genocide comitted in Bosnia in try's economy - which has 1999. , been in decline since 1989. The charges include respon- The Argentinian peso has sibility for the murder of 900 been pegged one-on-one to ethnic Albanians, and the the US dollar since 1992 in an forced exodus of 800,000 civil- effort to curb inflation., but ians from their homes. has now been released follow- The 60-year-old was extra- ing a recent upturn in fortunes. dited from Serbia last year, in a However, inflation is still a move that sparked controversy major worry, one British ana- and re-opened old wounds lyst insisted. A return to the within the balkan country. Two 1980's (when inflation topped more indictments will follow - Good food at good prices for students, staff and faculty, 10%) would cripple the coun- all carry 'unlimited' sentences. served in daVinci's and dBs on the ground floor of the Union Building, Beit Quad try. Argentinia was once the Joe Wednesday Thursday Friday

9th rAi 10th lit

2002 \rWunion djsrplay They're playing om song Look out for the exciting line-up of up-and-coming of the Union. bands during our Sound £1/pint Tetleys Band Nights this term. or Carlsberg There will be new Comedy while beer lasts acts, special Bar promotions, and the Union DJs will be frOITI 5pm (dBs only) playing the best dance music Wednesday and Friday 8pm-2am 8pm-11pm c nights. Look out for the ads £1 Unk>n/£1.50 Guests FREE@the union in Felix for Special Events, especially the Valentine's Pa Vinci'* Day Massacre on Friday, mk Chili & Fries Febrary 15. CM intheUDH — Qa{i bar Tuesday Thursday y Wednesday Friday 15th 1 union dj$:ploy Nicf lit union KANDY Bp: play The Sweet Taste of New Music 7:30pm/FREE@the union

£1/pint Tetleys UNION or Carlsberg while beer lasts QUIZ NIGHT )roqressiveflwnce\2>:„..P sponsored! from 5pm wbs only) 'louielfbiza Tunes^. «sss 8pm-2am 8pm™2am Prizes: £50 & beer £1 Union/£1.50 Guests £1.50 Union/£2 Guests Friday Night Out 8:30pm/FREE@the union Supported by

ili & Fries Pa Vinci'* the UDH m imperial Union Building — Qa{i bar — college Beit Quad r.o.a.r, Open noon-11pm Saturdays and noon 10:30pm Sundays charity feature

Save A Nation campaign raises El 3K

£13,600. A small or a large amount of tributed. At the close of the event one of the grand finale of the campaign. Around money? To you and I an immense amount, the campaign, the total amount raised thirty (insane or committed?) people gave but what is it to Afghanistan's eight mil- stood at £2000. up their last Wednesday afternoon of lion people in desperate need of aid? A During the following weeks, further col- term to run around the Serpentine in the welcome gesture of compassion from lections were made after the Islamic cold December air. Some (less insane or Imperial College students. Society's daily iftaar (held throughout less committed?) people walked around. In an attempt to raise money for the Ramadan in the JCR) and after the week- Walking or running, a single lap around Afghan people, and to bring about a ly Friday prayers, which alone raised the Serpentine added a further £2000 to greater awareness of the many hardships more than £5000 over the duration of the the appeal. they are facing, Imperial College's Islamic campaign. Young, innocent first years The total amount of money raised Society decided to run an appeal during were dressed in luminous yellow jackets, through this campaign stands at £13,600, the last few weeks of the winter term. given big buckets and also sent collecting surpassing the aim and everyone's expec- Entitled, 'Save a Nation' and with the slo- around campus, but by far the most suc- tations. This money will go towards the gan Act Now1, it aimed to raise £10 000 to cessful collection (also being equally the community projects being run by Islamic donate to Islamic Relief, a UK registered most embarrassing) was the collection Relief in Afghanistan and maintaining the chanty that has been working in escapade on the 8th December. Equipped many refugee camps that have been Afghanistan since 1992. with more yellow jackets and this time formed in the last few months. It will help The campaign was planned to coincide sandwich boards for good measure, the provide much needed food, water and with the Islamic holy „ hygiene kits for the month of Ramadan, Afghan people. Islamic which sees Muslims Relief has a refreshing across the globe fast- approach to humani- ing for thirty days. tarian aid, taking into With empty stomachs, consideration the it is always easier to needs of the host pop- empathise with those ulation and trying to less fortunate and con- provide respect, con- sequently it is a time sistency and fairness when Muslims are in its relief work. encouraged to give The Islamic Society generously to people would like to thank in need. Furthermore, everyone who took Ramadan provided the part in the various perfect opportunity to events for their time introduce friends and effort, as well as around campus to the other Imperial soci- Muslim traditions such as fasting, break- Islamic Society's more adventurous mem- eties that helped out. The biggest thank ing fast and praying together, allowing bers travelled to Green Street for a full you, however, goes to all of the IC stu- the other cultures at Imperial to become day's collection aimed at Saturday shop- dents and staff who donated money to part of the appeal. pers. They returned with £1500 to add to the appeal, allowing us to show our fel- Fittingly, the opening event of the cam- a fast rising total. low beings in Afghanistan that we care. paign was an Inter-Soc Iftaar dinner (a No appeal is complete without a few We hope that amidst all the money col- meal to break fast). Dinner was provided bazaars and jumble sale type events so in lecting and fun people became more by the Islamic society, but the real treat true Blue Peter style two bazaars were aware of the problems being faced by for the night were the snacks supplied by held in the JCR selling 'Save a Nation' people in Afghanistan, and that our work IC's national societies: PakSoc came bear- merchandise. This included a very stylish for them does not end with this cam- ing samosas, MalaySoc, spring rolls and black T-shirt fronted by the appeal logo paign. ArabSoc traditional Arabian pastries. (still available if anyone is interested), cds For anyone wishing to give to Islamic Food was followed by a short presenta- of 'Muslim vocal performance' and Eid Reliefs Afghanistan Appeal you can con- tion from Islamic Relief about their work greeting cards. These proved successful tact Islamic Relief on 08704 443 132 or in Afghanistan, at the end of which it was ways of raising money, as people were visit their website at www.islamic- explained to the 200 strapped-for-cash IC more willing to give for something in relief.com. There is still much work to be students present how a little money goes return, and the sales resulted in the cam- done and money is desperately needed. a long way. Confronted with facts such as paign being publicised widely across that five pounds provides a child with campus. ICU Islamic Society flour for a month, even the poorest con- A sponsored run in Hyde Park marked [email protected]. uk jpldmsn

tlonal

Dinner,

Cultural Show

& After-Show Party

Febru aiy 2002

Full Tickets: £12 Reception: 6pm OSC Members: £10 Venue: Sherfield Building

Tickets A1Mailabl e soon union talk

Attention Sporty/Adventurous Types

Harlington Trust should other sources of funding be these expeditions. Each of the sponsoring The Harlington Trust was established in involved, the merit of the bid (i.e. whether bodies is represented on the Board, which 1989 to manage, for the benefit of Imperial it is likely to enhance or maintain the rep- meets twice a year to consider proposals College students, money received from utation of the College) and whether it is submitted to it. the gravel extraction operation at the likely to unduly benefit those who are not The Board may decide to recognise Harlington playing fields. The Trustees, of current students. expeditions as official College ventures, whom the Union President is one, wel- Those activities with Union backing thus providing insurance for personnel come applications for grants from stu- (i.e. part of an official club or society) and and equipment. In many cases recogni- dents in the College and have a maximum a long and sustainable existence are more tion carries with it a grant towards the of £50,000 to allocate each year. likely to gain support. While it is usually cost, though most expeditions are also The principles under which the groups that benefit, it is also possible for required to raise support in the form of Trustees operate have been laid down by students to submit individual bids, money or equipment from sources outside the College's Governing Body. Perhaps though often they will compete either at the College. In addition, a variety of due to the origins of the funding, income college level or higher, thus enhancing equipment is held for loan to approved from the Trust is intended for the benefit the prestige of the College. expeditions. of IC students mainly in relation to sport- Exploration Board The final meeting of the Board for this ing, athletics and recreational facilities, The Exploration Board was set up in 1955 academic year will take place on 6th though only to finance new or improved under the sponsorship of the College, the February, so if you are planning an expe- facilities, and not to meet running costs or Union and the Constituent College dition for this summer you need to start replacement of consumables. Associations to consider proposals for putting together proposals immediately. In making their decisions the Trustees expeditions submitted by students of the See www.su.ic.ac.uk/exploration for will weigh up the cost of the bid versus College, and to administer funds given by more information its potential benefit, the financial risk the sponsors to assist with the cost of Rob

Eating Disorders

Eating Disorders tion, poor circulation (feeling cold) and If you feel you do have a problem the first Eating disorders affect many people. sleep difficulties. Women also experience step (slightly cliched) is to recognise it. Anorexia Nervosa sees the individual the stopping of periods, which usually From here there must be a genuine desire starving them while Bulimia Nervosa has returns once the starving has halted. to get better, possibly altering your patterns of binge eating followed by vom- Often Anorexics will experience osteo- lifestyle, behaviour and circumstances. iting and laxative abuse. Either way the porosis (thinning of the bones). The reason for your problem also has to relationship with food is changed and are Psychologically there is depression, mood be investigated and changes made here often due to feelings that make the affect- swings, intense fear of gaining weight as well as re-shaping your ideas about ed person unhappy or depressed. It may and a distorted perception of body weight food and weight. Remember, though, you be associated with sadness, guilt, loss, and shape. Behaviourally those affected are not alone. Medical advice should be fear or anger. will wear baggy clothes, exercise exces- sought and speaking to a counsellor could It is difficult to say how many people in sively, lie about eating meals and will be extremely important especially with the UK are affected by an eating disorder. deny any problems associated. look at the reasons for the eating disorder. Many go undiagnosed but it is believed Bulimia Losing weight that one in every hundred young women Here physical signs can include sore If you wish to or need to lose weight for are affected by Bulimia and a smaller, but throats, repeated mouth infections, health reasons its best to do it via a con- still significant, number by anorexia. The dry/poor skin and sleep difficulties. trolled programme. Begin with cutting Royal College of Psychiatry estimated in Periods don't stop, but can be irregular. out the crap in your diet; junk food, fatty 1992 that at any one time 60,000 individu- Due to the vomiting, those with Bulimia cakes, chocolate; replacing with addition- als were receiving treatment for an often have poor teeth and will avoid al fruit and vegetables. Take additional Anorexia or Bulimia. Currently, the Eating going to the dentist. Psychologically exercise, and build up slowly. Remember Disorder Association believes the figure those affected feel depressed, and exhibit you can speak to your doctor about advice to be more likely 90,000, with many more mood swings and highly emotional on your diet and changes to your life that undiagnosed, particularly those with behaviour, which is caused by the body you can make Anorexia Nervosa. reacting to the consumption of large Eating Disorder Association Helpline- Physical signs of Anorexia can include amounts of food followed by vomiting or 01603 621414 (weekdays 9am to 6.30pm). severe weight loss, dizziness, constipa- taking laxatives. David The Royal College of Science Union Presents the Second Annual AMSTERDAM WEEKEND

25th - 27th JANUARY 2002 LEAVE FRIDAY NIGHT AND RETURN SUNDAY NIGHT

COACH, FERRY AND ACCOMODATION ALL FOR JUST £60

To book your ticket or for more information, email [email protected] or pop into the RCSU office

(on Unwin Road between CivEng and MechEng) talk felix

Inkwell

By Nate Evuarherhe liant idea went drastically wrong. of the term was an ill-advised and unintelli- I was most disappointed to hear last term, Student apathy, as is by and large the gent one. In plain and simplistic terms, by that the Lecturer Evaluation Scheme was a case, was clearly the result of a belief in an that time of the term, nobody gives a mon- dismal and utter failure owing principally to inability to effect change... a sense of impo- keys about anything anymore. Most cer- student apathy, and a number of other tence. A feeling that the evaluation would tainly not "lecturer evaluation"! A scheme in Great Union Screw-Ups. (Namely poorly ultimately amount to nothing and, at the the very first weeks of the second, or third written, hack-able computer programmes.) end of the day, horribly bad lecturers would term would have been a far more fruitful If you've ever wondered how on earth some still roam the halls next year, and beyond. and successful project. lecturers of this University managed to get The Scheme failed to make clear the pos- And finally, let it be said, that the hacking the jobs they currently hold, this was a sible consequences of student opinion. of the supposedly secure website, by stu- much-awaited chance for us to do some What happens to those lecturers we deem dents of the computing department, speaks evaluation and academic feedback, and I to be grossly incompetent, and fundamen- of shamefully farcical planning by the think the Union owes it to the entire student tally bad teachers? Do they get the sack? Union. If Imperial College of Science and body to orchestrate an evaluation/feedback Do they get a talking to by the head of the Technology (keywords: science and tech- programme of some sort. department or what? nology) cannot adequately produce a viable But as far as brilliant ideas go, this is The poorly conceived scheme failed to and operational online system, then in all about where it stops. Not only was the convince students on why it was important fairness, how can the Union ever be taken entire scheme poorly and incompetently that they voted. The result being that voter seriously? run, but it was also revealed last term, that apathy was inevitable from the start. The sad and unfortunate result of all this, students of the computing department had The timing was also horribly wrong. is that the small number of IC students who detected a bug in the supposedly secure There is a student "cycle of life" at IC. In the felt the need to voice their opinion about the online system. That means of course, that if first few weeks of term, the student is live- people who teach them, would of course you took the time to log on and evaluate ly, energetic, and bubbling with enthusi- remain unheard, and this is heart-breaking. your lecturer, the said lecturer could (in the- asm to make the best of the term etc. etc. Of After all let's face it, a great many of the ory) be looking at your evaluation and plot- course by week 6, this becomes a figment of lecturers who walk these halls are simply ting to fail you at the end of the year. the imagination, and by week 9 nobody excruciatingly bad teachers, who make sit- The bottom-line being, that somewhere really gives a dead rat about study groups ting in a lecture like watching a really long between student apathy, and yet another and seminars anymore. The idea of carrying monologue in a badly written play. Great Union Screw-Up, a wonderfully bril- out lecturer evaluation in the dying weeks The Student voice must be heard.

Editorial

Happy New Year, dear readership, and wel- Monday night (split deadlines). Fine, so the same subject, and from the negative come to another term of journalistic delight. that'll not happen. I'll comment on other feedback that Felix and others have This first issue, I will be the first to admit, is issues. received, I have to say that it seems that slightly paltry, perhaps. While the excuse is LEQs. Oh yes. You can see the Inkwell there could be a few improvements. lame: many of my writers have not returned above is discussing this, and while I agree However nothing ever works first time, and to the fold yet, it is valid, in that I believe with his sentiments, I feel it should be this is the first year that it has been a joint that it is my job to edit this newspaper, and pointed out that the Union is not entirely to Union-College venture, so I'm willing to ensure its continuing existence financially, blame (especially the security matters), as give them a chance. If they screw up next but not necessarly to write it all. This is Inkwell implies, but since it represents all year, however... meant to be a student newspapaer. Not to students here, it should have been more So that was my attempt at trying to be mention how lazy I am. sure that everything went according to topical and actually commenting seriously I have been informed by nearly everyone plan. However, you can't ever tell College on the issues that affect the students. that my editorials are boring and full of use- what to do, sadly. The words 'lumbering' Perhaps I'm too apathetical, but frankly that less information. Now I thought that this and 'behemoth' spring to mind. was a real effort. I think next time I'll stick was fun and quirky, but apparently it's not. In fact, having spoken (personally, and to something easier, like random banter and As such, I'm now going to fulfill the point of not professionally) to various important space filling when I have half a page left... an editorial by, in the words of a so-called people in the Union, it is clear that the LEQs not that I mean that. friend, 'creating a coherent view of the were actually very important to them, and No really. So I think I'll stick to what I issues raised in that week's publication'. from what I know, most of the blame should know, and do something easier, like dis- So, news. Ah yes, that which we don't be laid on College. cussing my sex life. Last week I went to write until Wednesay night, and now is Similarily, there is a letter complaining on bed with several nubile young... felix talk

Rag Ramble

You lucky people! Friday February 22nd with a School Falmouth Keogh Rule! Be happy, IC students, you have a mas- Uniform Day and balloon lift on the Congrats to John-Joe, Javed and the FK sive total of two Rag Weeks coming up Queen's Lawn. Hall committee for putting on a storming this term! The ICU Rag Week nominated charity is show to raise money for the Rotherham Twice as many chances to do mad and the Shooting Star Appeal, raising money Hospice in December. Everything from a different stuff, twice as many chances to to build the first specialist hospice for ter- Steps tribute band, leg waxing and slave raise tonnes of cash for charity, and twice minally ill children in Kensington, Chelsea auction to an unintentionally Full Monty as many opportunities to get totally rat- and all of West London. raised £700, and a very good time was ted for a good cause. The sexy new website on had by all. Nice one, guys! Coming up first is Medics Rag Week, www.su.ic.ac.uk/rag will tell you what's January 28th to February 1st, raising going on, and so will Felix over the next Carolling for cash money for the CLIC - the charity challeng- few weeks. There's every chance for you Two groups of carol singers made beau- ing childhood cancer and leukaemia. to get involved and get yourself out of the tiful music just before Christmas. A group Grab a medic or look out for the greens to library, so go on, you know you need a from the medical school serenaded travel- find out what's planned... break by now... ers at Victoria Station for CLIC, while IC Also there's the Rag Dash, already a choir sang their hearts out at Marylebone sold-out event starting at IC on January Save A Nation station and around the local mews just off 18th and heading up north (and as far Respect to Islamic society and every- Exhibition Road for the Shooting Star away from sunny South Kensington as one who got involved in the "Save A Appeal. Both were hugely successful possible, it looks like!) Nation" campaign for Afghanistan last (either asking for donations to carry on, or Then there's the more 'bijou' ICU Rag term. The total is at £13,000 and still ris- just to keep quiet) and we'll bring you the Week, starting on Valentines Day with the ing, so if you're interested, check out the totals next week. Thanks to all who return of the Barbershop Quartet, Hit feature on page 5 to find out the deatils of helped out, and keep up the excellent Squad and Grim Reapering. A pub crawl, what happened and how that lovely singing! London raid and a ball later, it'll end on money will be spent. helen

IC Radio

IC Radio would like to wish you all a Student radio for Imperial College produce your very own show. happy new year. And if "listen to ICR" It's apparent that many students here at wasn't one of your new year's resolutions, Imperial don't even know that we have What music do we play? then it really should have been! our own radio station. Well, IC Radio is an Just about every genre of music is cov- ICU society, and so any IC student can ered - R&B, rap, hip-hop, reggae, soul, The grand IC Radio station relaunch! join. No experience is necessary, and dance, trance, house, drum&bass, For a variety of reasons, it's taken longer though we have over 100 members, we're garage, chill-out, cheese, pop, indie, rock, than expected to complete our brand new always on the lookout for new ones. We alternative and some other ones that I studios in Beit Quad. We were broadcast- have opportunities in every aspect of can't think of at the moment. We also ing from the first day of term, but to be radio, from publicity to presenting. have talk shows and review shows, and honest the studios were a tip, we had there's news on the hour every hour. about half the equipment we really need- Why choose us? ed, and the production studio was merely But, when presented with the chbice of IC Listen! a figment of the technical team's imagi- Radio or one of the myriad of other sta- As ever, we're broadcasting quality radio nation. tions available to you, why should you lis- programmes 24 hours a day, 7 days a But now everything is finally up and ten to us? Well, our playlists are chosen week. You can listen on 999AM in running, including interview room and especially for the student audience. You Southside and Linstead halls, and on the (shock!) production studio. As a result, can listen to your friends/contempo- internet at www.icradio.com anywhere. we've decided to stage a Station raries/enemies making stars/idiots of Come and see us in the West Wing of Relaunch event on Thursday 17th Jan. at themselves. Aside from a couple of min- Beit Quad, or email [email protected]. 7pm in the Union Bar. There'll be the utes at the beginning of each hour, there usual fun and games, plenty of drinking are no adverts. We run loads of competi- and a chance to meet\greet\kill\shag tions and, due to the smaller audience, those bastards who keep playing loud you're a lot more likely to win. And apart icradioi music in the mornings. from all that, you can come and present or www.icradio.com II iflUlu talk back

No Offence Meant Tease? Me? One Ring to Bind... I will always be in your mind as a guide on this great jour- The Commemoration Day My dearest William, Dear Will ney which you are going to arrangements both at IC and Are you ever planning to run You are in great danger. The undertake. God bless you. RAH were excellent and your much-anticipated "multi- evil rector Sykeon is building Gandalf absolutely first class; all those ple-choice, decide-my-fate an army to try and take your involved should be congratu- editorial thing"? You've been condom collection. You must lated; we all left with our pos- hinting at it all term, and quite take your condom collection, And Finally... itive feelings about IC frankly I think that it's time to over bog and over dell, stop- enhanced and reinforced. put your money where your ping regularly to eat great Felix, My criticism was solely mouth is, as it were. feasts, and destroy your con- What are you on? I have directed at the Success Or have your hints merely dom collection in the never read such large chunks Photography's 'studio' photo- been an elaborate double wretched fires of ICT (the com- of vomitous nonsense in my graphs of the graduates which bluff? Is your repeated prom- puting service). Your condom life. Why do you waste stu- could have been better with a ise of imminent fulfilment just collection is a source of great dent money with this twad- slightly more contrasting a cruel reworking of the clas- power and you must destroy it dle? Is there a point? If I were background, something the sic "how to keep an idiot in before the evil rector has a in any position of power, I photographers should make a suspense" line? chance to take it using his evil would instantly have you note of for the future. Do tell. wenches from the student removed from this position. Dr KSM Bhatta G :op finance office. (Sounds good to You are meant to represent the me, Ed.) With the condom col- student voice, as well as Well, Mr. G :op (if that's your lection he would be able to reporting what is relevant to LEQ Trouble real name), I think you are cor- rule Imperial and all CCU's, as the students, and to an extent, rect in demanding an explana- they would unable to resist his even to the professors. And Hiya, tion. I had intended, as many mighty and evil power. A what happens? You just sit Here's my very brief account of you may have sussed, to great shadow is falling over there writing letter to yourself, of using the ill-fated LEQs. I have a 'guess you own adven- this once great land and it is whining: 'No-one else ever download my email at home ture' editorial, where I would upon your meagre shoulders writes anything'. Bollocks. and received a message with provide options, and the pun- to save humanity. Love Will (Felix Editor) my LEQ username and pass- ters would write in to tell me word. what to do with my life. Fair enough I thought, Usually, admittedly, with refer- clicked on the link and., oh! I ence to sex. Do you want to earn couldn't access the site from While this was a lovely idea, home, only internal IC IP num- no-one seemed even remotely bers were allowed. The next interested in the idea, and if £6 per hour? time I used a computer in my only four people wrote in hav- department I couldn't remem- ing decided I should make love The Emergency Night Bus Service ber the password I was given to a small rhino, then I could because it was stored in my have been in trouble. The is looking for Stewards, inbox at home. Could I be added crisis of actually landing particularly women, arsed to go home and write it myself a girlfriend merely com- down? I think you know the pounded the situation, and as to work from the beginning answer to that. Every single such I'm not sure how interest- of the October term. secure online I need to access ing it would be to ask 'Should I at IC is done through one user- take her out to dinner, go to Ability to drive a Union minibus name and password, from the pub, shag her senseless, or is desirable, but not essential. checking email to registering pull her sister'. Well, it might Shifts are available on Wednesday course options! Why some- be interesting, but pointless. thing so important could be The answer would clearly be and Friday evenings from midnight. done with the usual password go to the pub. and something so seemingly So you see, Mr. G, my conun- For more information please contact: frivolous would have to have drum, and while I am tempted [email protected] its own is beyond me. to dump her, and have a laugh But then what do I care? I'll on all of your behalfs, and at be miles away from here in six my expense, I think I'll stick imperial months time. with sex, thank you. college Iain Angus (Computing 4) Sorry to disappoint. Work for yourself. Work at the Union...and make a difference to vour social life. this week

imperial College \ accommodation link k s Wanted for ESaetter Friday Weekend

2002 Thi Wee Persona -KirtMife tHe followi qualitiea Energy, personality, flair, common sense, excellent Shaft Walk Like An Egyptian presentation, and good communication skills to fill the How rude. Anyway, it's Well you could. It would following positions: s going to be all 70s dress- be something to do. You n DAY SHIFT LEADERS £6.00 per hour ing up. Men in leather could do it in the quad, DAY RECEPTION £5.00 per hour and flares, girls in and then it would be a NIGHT SHIFT LEADERS £6.50 per hour miniskirts. Mmm, I'm Union event, and every- Unio NIGHT RECEPTION £5.50 per hour Event already moist. thing. I'll watch from my Until Late, dBs window, hehehe. BENEFITS INCLUCE: FREE ACCOMMODATION(Easter) New Year's Resolutions Union Block Out

FULL TRAINING s

t Don't know what tins UNIFORM PROVIDED personally (unless means, but it's happen- AND PAID HOLIDAY you're me, in which case ing in loads of places. FOR AN APPLICATION FORM COME BY V;: v.. DBs and the Dining THE CONFERENCE OFFICE keep my various com- Room, all evening. Well, LOCATED IN PRINCES GARDENS

GROUND FLOOR OF SOUTH SIDE Studen mitments to drinking you can go and have a Activitie OR CALL less, sleeping more, etc. look, 1 suppose 0207 594 9533 Lord Of The Rings Harry Potter OR E-MAIL If you haven't seen this If you haven't seen this

[email protected] s e blockbusting, record- blockbusting, record- CLOSING DATE FOR APPLICATIONS WILL BE FEBRUARY 11™ 2002 breaking, action-packed breaking, action-packed special effects bonanza, special effects bonanza, Th

t based on the popular based on the popular A Movie book, you really should. book, you really should. Wake up to Any cinema, anywhere. Any cinema, anywhere. Blind Date

n Definitely gieat TV. No o radio question. Although the Ui,,'"'y.v. /;".v;r-r-:7;i/s: i: . '.f'-iiV' ten to the breakfast minging more often than show online and go back Radi

& So perhaps missable.

station Televisio icradio.com. 8-10am ITV. 6.20pm

Vade Mecum Although

The ICR Breakfast Show s Catch the most exciting Promoting Union gigs act never to get signed and student-y goings on weekdays 8-10am & since Bis had that single is a function of your s on Top of the Pops. My luwerly Felix, after all. best mate knows them. So if you have a gig, mail

Gig Nepotism? Us? Never. listings (2 weeks' Concert Abingdon Alley, £5 notice) to [email protected] broadcasting 24/7 on 999AM in Southside & Linstead halls,

and www.icradio.com everywhere s Hilarious comedy from & the Marquez brothers. e ships and troubled Lauded at the Edinburgh

imperial V'ifitV/j .. ;vv ' - ,.;>.... radio » college tunes - essential. Smack The Pony bloke, icradio is an ' '.J: ' ' '\.^Vg"V.;6'V>'i.) this is good stuff. Gallerie student radio for Imperial College ICU society Theatr Hampstead Theatre. 8pm week this

Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday

Christian People Open Dex & Trivia Cheesy Wotsits Comedy Kandy They're up to something It wouldn't be Tuesday More oppurtunities to I hope it's funny. At least Lordy me...The sweet in dBs, but I'm afraid I without it. I bet ourge t vomited on by he's got a funny name. sound of new music. don't know what. University Challenge sports teams, or per- Who? I hear you ask.Sound s good to me, if Apparently they'll be in Team will be there, feel- haps even get in a fight. Ray Peacock, I reply. you like that kind of action, but I don't know ing cocky. Well go and You never know your Guffaw. Pea. Cock. thing. Dance music, of what that means... show them who's daddy. luck. Bring your camera. Gag-tastic. I'm off to bed. all sorts. Give it a go! 6pm, dBs Da Vinci's, early evening Union, For Ever dBs, 8ish, I imagine. Union, 7pm - 2am

Dance Attic DrarnSoc Auditions DramSoc Auditions What's That? This centre in Fulhani Ambulance First Aid: Individual auditions fur iGroup audition. 6,30-A Friday, and no student :ipl<-^.(/2 .!:'':.;:'"r^!:i~ 8pm, seminar room 2. activities? Who'd have students, and it's appar- tions. Practice your Wife. 20 min slots from The play is a comedy set thought. To think I could ently quite good, too skills for that vital 6pm in seminar room 5. stay in bed and not Improve your moves or moment when you Sign up on sheet on bother with this diary. pick up a posh bird. ti'-r-H^."':--''; nottceboard by dBs. You know, maybe I will 36.3 North End Road, SWS See tomorrow for more.

2001: A Space Oddessy Behind Enemy Lines Black Hawk Down Bridget Jones' Diary Braveheart If you haven't seen this If you haven't seen this If you haven't seen this If you haven't seen this If you haven't seen this blockbusting, record- blockbusting, record- blockbusting, record- blockbusting, record- blockbusting, record- breaking, action-packed breaking, action-packed breaking, action-packed breaking, action-packed breaking, action-packed special effects bonanza, special effects bonanza, special effects bonanza, special effects bonanza, special effects bonanza, based on the popular based on the popular based on the popular based on the popular based on the popular ter- book, you really should. war, you really should. war, you really should. slag, you really should. rorist, you really should. Uxbridge Chimes Odeon Any cinema, anywhere. Any cinema, anywhere. Any cinema, anywhere. Scotland Only.

What The Victorians What Not To Wear Channel 4 News Aie you the solitary Fblix Did For Us Two ugly women who Have you evei seen the Ahh ha ha ha ha ha ha .^m ';::;£v;--c;S>£'i;:: dress badly telling other ha ha ha ha. Your mar-

: the rest of this blatant Slums, cholera, bigotry, ugly women who dress r.,'r''-i'l'-.!v'<.vf;;. riage is ending in faliurel plug for will's show, repressesed sexuality, badly how to dross, don't oven know if there Publicly' which vaiies from cack Christmas, pollution... badly. So will says '..v.. flrjo'-^asr;?.

to rubbish weekly. oh. go on. then. Bitterness? No' '-.. '>:>,:.; myself. Oh ... BBC Knowlege, 6 pm BBC 2, 8 30 pm Channel 4, 7pm Sky One. 1.45 pm

Incubus Fad Gadget Big Bad Voodoo Daddy Hoggboy Sona Fariq It's probably a measure Sounds a bit gimmicky Oh, Yes! They have a What is this, comedy- Agressive yet listenable of the state of the music to me. Still, they must be great name. Let's hope bleedin'-band-names political rock outfit sitting industry (or perhaps my OK to be headlining at they talk half as well as week? Hee, hee, they're neatly between Rage laziness), but there the Garage, so they they walk. I guess play- named after a fictional and ADF Adrenalin- aren't any good gigs in might be worth a look. ing and singing would homosexual position I've charged and passion- London today. Sorry. Who knows? be even better. just invented, hee, hee. fuelled thrills aplenty. Civic Hall Wolverhampton Highbury Garage, 7.30 Mean Fiddler £8.50 Camden Monarch, 8pm Camden Monarch

Galleries Boston Marriage Entwistle : v;. '"'.v. I'm M.it'i Exciting and funny com- Not actually a tribute to This classic musical

; tell you about the many edy set in America, run- the TV legend, but fringe production in the;''iii;;.^itvv^:':; ;:;;^i'i: . l^ypXydy

excellent galleries, exhi- ning until the end of rather a gallery show- Vaudeville Theatre. ; '.,'.- :' :: .

bitions and shows on February. Unmissable, v;-/9)':-. here in London. Go see. by all accounts. '[':--'.'b\'-' ''. Vvu;, must get out and 'catch You're not paying all We iv Ambassadors' Art or Arse'-' You decide.

that rent to watch telly. Theatre. WC2. 8pm 6 Cork Street. Wl Vaudeville, 7 30pm £9.50 .:,v.v:'-:f'W-%'?i ;:' music reviews

Jimmy Eat World Candidate Various Jimmy Eat World Tiger Flies A Wireless Nation Vol 1

Out now on Dreamworks records Out Monday 28 Jan on Snowstorm records Out now on GranKru records

This is the fourth album from the up and Candidate first found their way into the This is a compilation album featuring the coming American pop thrashers. It was spotlight in April of last year when their best of UK rap and drum 'n' bass. recorded with the band's own money debut album Taking On The Enemy's The compilation is centred around the after they were dropped from their previ- Sound was released, but after playing "A Letter To Tony Blair" campaign, which ous record label. one gig they dived back into their shell attempts to implement legislation forc- The release of Jimmy Eat World was and disappeared. And as they say - out ing radio stations to play at least 40% originally planned for the middle of of sight, out of mind. British origin music, 20% of which must October but due to its unfortunate origi- But not for long. The north London be that of new or unestablished bands. nal title [Bleed American), they thought it four-piece are back, and with something This would no doubt increase the variety best in light of the events of 11 special. Tiger Flies is a delicate mix of of music on our airwaves. The campaign September to postpone the release and natural rhythms and chilled-out melodic is being run by GranKru records in con- rethink the title too. samples, which sounds like the bizarre junction with the Media Access Trust. This is a typically American album, love child of Zero 7 and Coldplay. They say, among other things, that such and I mean that in a good way. From the Be warned - this isn't the kind of music a law would "enhance and benefit local lyrics to the production, it is refreshing. you can just listen to. It's the kind of creativity". Bands more about machismo than sub- music you have in the background when The CD includes music from such lumi- stance - the likes of Blink 182 and Limp you're doing really important things, like naries as the Freestylers, Asian Dub Bizkit - currently dominate the American coursework or seducing your gentle- Foundation (pic above), Grooverider and music scene, and this really is the perfect man/lady/farm animal of choice. Maxim of the Prodigy. Because of this, it antidote to such dross. If you pay attention though, amidst the features quite a diverse range of styles Jimmy Eat World are a band with their twinkling guitars and unobtrusive beats, within the two main genres - hip-hop and hearts strapped firmly to their sleeves. there are colourful lyrics with hidden drum 'n' bass. One might have thought Songs like Hear You Me, // You Don't, meanings and double entendres sprin- that there was more "music of British ori- Don't and Your House certainly would not kled throughout. gin" than this (house, indie and rock pro- look out of place on, say, a soundtrack for The really amazing thing about this ductions are conspicuous by their Dawson's Creek - you know, when they band is the fact that they can play a myr- absence). Still, for the two genres cov- sit around a fire and discuss their best iad of weird and wonderful instruments, ered it gives a pretty broad overview ever hot chocolate moment and then from hammond organ to waikiki guitar with some quality tracks. smile at each other while exchanging and back again. The Optical and Ed Rush piece glances of unrequited love. Anyway... The really bad thing about this band is Compound is a particular favorite. It fea- The album opener and first single, Salt that their vocalist desperately needs to tures a sort of deep throbbing bass noise Sweat Sugar, hits you between the eyes work on his voice. I can say this again similar to that on Crazy (no, not the like a ballistic missile, and while you're and again about so many bands - they Britney Spears track) and is a nice slice of still reeling from that, Praise Chorus try so hard with their music that they for- drum 'n' bass. leaves you sadistically wanting more. get to find someone who can actually Some of the less well-known acts have For those less intense moments, tracks sing. produced songs especially for the album, like The Middle and The Authority Song Apart from that, this is a good, solid berating the music industry. As a politi- feature pop sensibility crossed with killer album from a band who are going some- cal tool, I don't know how this will fare. hooks. where provided that they don't disappear As a compilation album, it's OK but far There's something for everyone. from the scene like last time. from brilliant.

ID Warul Jess Alex reviews music

INTERVIEW with Derek from Alkaline Trio

Alkaline Trio originated in Chicago, Illinois about five years ago. They've released four albums and had a few changes of line-up. Felix caught up with their latest drummer Derek Grant before the last gig of their recent tour, at ULU (see review, left).

FELIX: How did you come to be playing in Alkaline Trio? DEREK: Well, the band started in Chicago with Matt [Skiba] playing guitar and singing with a couple of school mates. Then the other two left and Danny [Andriano] joined and then me. We'd all been in various punk bands before, and we all knew of each other. What's the motivation behind the band? LIVE: Alkaline Trio + Jesse The main motivation was to emulate our idols - the Sex Pistols, the Ramones, punk derived from the aesthetic... James + Crackout @ ULU But the Sex Pistols weren't a real punk band, they were more of a novelty band... The first band on provided a great warm-up to an evening of Well, we're really more interested in the image. We love the alcopop-fuelled teenage pogomg. Whilst tired old hacks played schlocky misfits kind of performance. In that sense, the music is "spot the riff" - Nirvana, Pixies, Shonen Knife, Wire - the kids secondary - it's the visual effect we go for. just got down to some skanking. There's probably no chance of How have you enjoyed this tour? a recording career for Jesse James, unless they come up with The other two tours were a disappointment in every way. The some ideas of their own. Still, they're great fun live for mayhem, interest, the vehicles, the turnout, the food, everything. But on moshing and working out those stresses. this one, every show is better than the last. The only real prob- lem is trying to sleep. One thing I like about your music is the attention paid to lyrics... Not a band to muck about with a winning formula, Crackout Yeah, that's one thing Matt is definitely good at. I suppose that carried on in much the same vein as Jesse James. Looking the imagery and gimmicks are good, but we wouldn't want to younger than their audience, they delivered what might have make them overtly so. At the end of the day, the lyrics are been expected in the form of early Ash or Bis bubblegum rock. important. The crowd decided to join in midway through the half-hour I've heard and interviewed a lot of up and coming indie bands set and they really went for it, moshing frenziedly to / Am The here at ULU, and I can't remember any of their names. Why One. The rocked-out set rounded off with You Dumb Fuck, which do you think you're going to be any different? has been receiving some airplay and is likely to get more if I don't know. Our goal is just to play music. Success or lack of it Crackout continue to win new fans. is coincidental, but it would be welcomed.

Robert

Alkaline Trio (pic above) are now on to their fourth album and OUT THIS WEEK have picked up a solid following along the way. The capacity audience and desperate indie kids buying tickets from touts The following are due out on Monday 14 January. Please note illustrated that they're well on the way to making it. that all release dates are subject to change. Although they all claimed to be ill (and lead singer Matt Skiba SINGLES proved it by throwing up on stage), that didn't stop the band BLACK REBEL MOTORCYCLE CLUB - Love Burns from churning out an hour's worth of indietastic mosh-inspiring BOMFUNK MCS - Superelectnc music. Don't be fooled by the rather uncharacteristic single CHEMICAL BROTHERS - Star Guitar Private Eye, which is at the tamer end of their material - they are P DIDDY feat NEPTUNES - Diddy best when going hell for leather at the guitars. GEORGE HARRISON - My Sweet Lord The talent that really puts Alkaline Trio above similar bands MERCURY REV - Dark Is Rising is the quality of their lyrics. Go and see them now, before you PINK - Get The Party Started have to pay a ridiculous price to watch them supporting Blink BRITNEY SPEARS - Overprotected 182 later this year. SUPER FURRY ANIMALS - It's Not The End Of The World WHEATUS - Leroy Robert music reviews

LIVE: Pulp + Fat Truckers LIVE: Ash @ Brixton Academy @ Brixton Academy

"We're Fat Truckers. We're not fat, we're not truckers and we're After an hour's wait, Ash finally came on stage, the lighting from Sheffield!" Yes, and four of the five use synths. Don't ask me making their introduction all the more spectacular, and to round what the other one does, because I'm not sure. off a good opening they played Girl from Mars. They then played "We may use synthesisers but we fookin' rock!" In all honesty, eight songs back to back consisting mainly of those from the what else would you expect from a band supporting Pulp? OK, album 1977, including Angel Interceptor and Oh Yeah. so they're not fat, but two of them are certainly portly. They're It soon dawned on me that this was going to.be a brilliant gig also geeks - this is apparent from their use of crazy sounds with - it was the last of the tour, Tim's voice was on fire, and the band much knob twiddling. And ironic dancing too. They do their job were putting their all into it. After the first eight songs there and then let a real showman take the stage. was a shift in style, as they played tracks from Free All Angels. Walking Barefoot was exceptional, as I think everyone else agreed, to go by the applause they received. I noticed after an hour that no songs from Trailer or Nu-Clear Sounds had been The last time I saw Jarvis Cocker was in Stoke Newington a played, but that didn't matter - they worked the crowd well, year or two ago, around the time Pulp released This is Hardcore. playing the favourites early on. As you may recall, this was when he went a bit funny and Ash then revealed two interesting facts: firstly, Westlife have "introspective". Needless to say, he was terrified to see someone a sense of humour (still to be proven) and secondly, Westlife are who'd recognised him. Thankfully tonight, the Jarvis of old is druggies. Tim went on to explain that Westlife rolled them a back, all elbows and posturing and wriggling. joint using a £20 note, at which point they burst into Burn Baby "It's been a while since we've been here", says Jarvis wistful- Burn - fantastic! ly, gazing around the sold-out arena. The next moment, he leaps After a few more tunes such as Candy and Jesus Says, they up onto a monitor and starts waggling his wrist. "That's still went off, only to return for an encore; and what an encore! It loose". Then he raises his leg and gives it a shake. "And that still was the longest encore I've ever heard, lasting over 45 minutes, works... so let's do it". And they do! with new songs, covers, fake snow falling from the balcony and The set kicks off with three songs from the new album We the band's determination to make it their longest gig ever, Love Life. Weeds, The Night Minnie Timperley Died and Birds In which it eventually was. To finish off the whole gig, they played Your Garden are all received with sumptuous fervour before Numbskull with real vigour and enthusiasm. Jarvis straps on his guitar to chime in the opening chords of Overall, classic! Something Changed. Today, he is a born natural to the game of showmanship, flitting effortlessly from song to song whilst 6990 Toby B maintaining relaxed yet charming banter with his adoring fol- lowers. COMPETITION The main set ends with a thunderous rendition of Sunrise. They return for encore 1 with Sorted For Es And Wizz, much to This week, we're giving away a 90-minute video of Ash play- everyone's delight, promptly followed by Babies and The Fear. ing live at the Akasaka Blitz in Tokyo last year. Encore 2 brings Party Hard and a searing finale of Underwear. QUESTION: The track Candy is from which Ash album? Take a bow Jarvis, we still love you! Please email your answer, along with your name, year and department, to [email protected] by Thursday 17 January. Warul reviews music

INTERVIEW with Richard from Hood

Hood's bassist Richard Adams spoke to Felix before their recent gig at the Arts Cafe (see review, right). The album Coid House is out now and was reviewed in Issue 1218.

FELIX: Can you introduce yourself, and say what you do? RICHARD: I'm Richard and I play bass, and guitar sometimes. Is Cold House an intentional progression or did you have a plan at the start? A little bit, but, well, it was just a bit haphazard really. We had a set of songs that we liked that fitted together, but a lot of it was trial and error. We wanted to make a more diverse album, because we've done the same stuff throughout, but we wanted to do that without it sounding like a compilation LP - we want- LIVE: Hood + Wauvenfold + ed it to flow, so it was definitely intentional. Is there any symbolism behind the title, Cold House? Where Cassette Boy @ Arts Cafe did that come from? It was what Chris [lead vocals and guitar] wanted to call his Tonight's show features one of the most flawless line-ups I have studio, 'cause he lives in a cold house, and no other titles that ever experienced. Wauvenfold are first to the stage. Tom Hill we came up with really fitted. That one did, so it stayed, and we and Noel Murphy mutilate twitchy cut-up beats and squeeze also think that Cold House could be a genre of music. numerous melodic gurgles from their mixers and laptops, You've got Dose One and Why? [from cLOUDDEAD] perform- sounding established and confident. Playing tracks from their ing on the record - did you meet them to record it? recent On the Blink ER Wauvenfold perform their songs with They approached us a couple of years ago, we hadn't heard of ease and humour in a live environment, adding a much-needed them, but Chris just loved it and we thought "let's get them in warmth to their compositions. on it", 'cause we wanted to work with hip-hop people. We heard what they were doing and it wasn't dissimilar to our ideas; we just had completely different backgrounds. Are you going to continue using hip-hop? Cassette Boy follow, with their peculiar blend of topical per- I don't know really, 'cause we try to change stuff on every formance art and satirical cut 'n' paste. Very sick indeed, but album. We want to do it but in a really commercial way, like Puff very humorous nonetheless. Perhaps they could rely less on Daddy, so we want really commercial samples so we can have shock tactics and yes, perhaps they could attempt something a hit and sell out [laughs]. I really want to do it, but to make a more original. But as far as disturbing, sardonic musical proj- full on hip-hop record would be too much of an obvious move. ects go, they're pretty unbeatable tonight. I noticed more than ever on CcJd House that there are ele- ments of glitchcore and electronica, really similar to stuff on Toytronic and Tigerbeat Six. How do you feel about compar- isons to artists like Kid606 and Cex? Finally Hood (pic above) take to the stage. This is the last leg of It's OK, but I think we're more interested in Autechre and Boards their UK tour, promoting their powerful new album Cold House. Of Canada and stuff like that over here. I mean, I do like Cex and Opening with They Removed All Trace That Anything Had Ever Kid606, but I also want something with a tune and a melody Happened Here, they pitch breakbeat rhythms against haunting that you can follow. It's the more melodic end of electronica that violin drones, hesitant guitar and a delicate forlorn vocal. we like, but we're not closed to more abstract ideas. Cold indeed! You can feel it in the air, as their music seems to Finally, are there any live antics planned for tonight? convey heightened emotion. Yet Hood's music sounds compara- We always want to make a lot more sound live, so it's not just tively warmer live than on record, with Gavin's faultless drum- like someone putting a CD on. We want to make it a bit differ- ming technique energising the band and transforming them ent and more aggressive. But we're not as intense as we used into a more relentless and aggressive unit. to be. When we played with Mogwai about two years ago, they Finding time to perform a few older numbers, Hood build up invited us up to play on Like Herod, and my brother Chris just their set subtly until a critical point is reached when they came on with his BMX and started riding around the stage in explode into their finale, Diesel Pioneers. Ten minutes of furious huge circles. It was one of the most surreal things I've ever seen mesmeric white noise follows, until Hood decide that enough is in my life. We're not going to be quite as wild as that tonight, I enough and quit the stage to rapturous applause. A spectacu- don't think. Unless Chris is planning something in secret... lar performance from a naturally impressive band.

Chris 9B000 Francois & Chris Interested in organising the biggest event at Imperial College?

Summerball 2002

imperial Please contact Sen Ganesh ([email protected]) for more information cO|ie9e union reviews book

attempt is never less than entertaining and for the most part it is compelling. In Brazzaville Beach (1990) Boyd examines many ethical issues relating to the nature of scientific research. He man- ages to weave these concerns into a plot which encompasses a doomed love story that takes place within the Mathematics Department at Imperial College (a backdrop in name only, the department is fortunately unrecognisable) leading the main character, Hope Clearwater to flee London for an African pri- mate research station, where she attempts to piece her life back together. While the events in England that led to her flight are gradually revealed in flashback, the situation in Africa becomes fraught as her research on the chimpanzee community begins to radically conflict with the long held the- ories of the project leader. The violence she observes in the chimps behaviour is mirrored by the civil war taking place around her and the desperate attempts of senior members of The Second Part of the the research team to suppress her findings. Boyd handles this plot with incredible skill, combining a novels of William Boyd novel of ideas with an action thriller. This is the third of his novels to be at least partially set in Africa and these scenes The article published in Felix last term reviewed the first five constitute the most powerful and evocative aspects of a com- books of William Boyd. Here we examine his more recent plex but highly readable and gripping story. work, starting with what many consider to be his most For his next novel Blue Afternoon (1993), Boyd moves to a accomplished novel The New Confessions (1987). It is certain- new continent, with most of the action taking place in Manila ly his longest and most ambitious work, taking in major world in 1902. At one level this is an intriguing detective story in an events throughout the first half of the twentieth century. It unfamiliar historical setting. Salvador Carriscant is a doctor, takes the form of the fictional autobiography of John James dedicated to introducing modern medical practices into a Todd, who as we have come to expect in Boyd's work, is country which is just recovery from a bloody colonial war something of a loner, struggling to relate with his family, with the USA. His infatuation with the wife of an American friends and society. The plot takes us from an austere Scottish army officer develops into a full blown affair, whilst at the upbringing, including of course another vivid account of life same time a series of murders takes place with the evidence at a public school, albeit an extremely eccentric one. Apart pointing to the perpetrator being a medical man. from an early gift for mathematics (a fascination of Boyd's to This central core of the novel is bookended by the story of which he returns in his next novel), Todd finds his main cre- Kay Fischer, a struggling Los Angeles architect, who in 1936 ative outlet in photography, which eventually guides him encounters Carriscant as an old man when he comes to her towards his career as a film director. The novel takes us claiming to be her father. This dual perspective opens up the through the horrors of the trenches in the First World War, and story, deepening the mystery surrounding Carriscant, so that a period in a German prisoner of war camp, which provides although one can admire his efforts to modernise the Manila Todd with the contacts that enable him to get a foothold in hospital when faced with every kind of obstructiveness, prej- the fledgling German film industry, where he eventually udice and suspicion, he remains something of an enigma. makes his reputation. His only reading material as a prisoner Once again Boyd displays his mastery of a complex narrative, is Rousseau's Confessions, which becomes an obsession for maintaining the suspense and delivering a few shocks in the him and the main key to the novel. It is certainly, true that process. when the action moves away from Germany with the rise of The Destiny of Nathalie X (1995) is Boyd's second short Nazism and with Todd attempting to .build a new career in story collection and it is dominated by the title story, which is Hollywood, the story begins to lose momentum. Todd sees lit- one of the best things he has written. The social satire of his tle action in the Second World War and the main battles in the third novel Stars and Bars was sometimes overblown, but latter part of his life come with the spectre of McCarthyism. It here it is razor sharp. may perhaps be a truthful reflection of a life where great early In 40 pages he dissects modern Hollywood as producers, promise is never fully realised and where the twilight years agents and actors queue up to exploit the latest European art may offer a chance of redemption (the are many things in house success in the shape of a new African / French director Todd's life for which he has no cause to be proud), but not Aurelian. Our hero is probably insane, but the industry is des- necessarily a happy ending. One gets the impression that perate to laud his genius with devastating and hilarious Boyd has enthusiastically embarked upon an epic, but ulti- results. Nothing else in this sometimes experimental collec- mately hasn't the stamina to complete the task, but if this tion quite matches this opening shot, but all the stories are remarkable book fails to live up to its early promise, the entertaining. book reviews

Finally we have Armadillo (1998), Boyd's tale of the "little Open Season by C J Box armed man", Lorimer Black, who works as an insurance loss adjuster. Black wears invisible armour every day as he careful- Putnam, $23.95 ly prepares the image he will present to his business clients. In fact his whole life has been reinvented, so that the real Milo Game warden, Joe Pickett is your ideal family man with a lov- Blocj with his loving but demanding family are consigned to a ing wife, Marybeth, two young daughters and another child on completely separate sphere. Lorimer blends perfectly in a world the way. Joe is the ranger in Saddlestrmg, a small Wyoming where nothing is quite what it seems, but his stability is rocked town which is typical of any rural American dwelling, right when he is assigned to investigate a major business fraud that down to Main Street and the large number of townsfolk who seems to taint everyone associated with it. To make his life even enjoy hunting in the nearby countryside. more complicated he becomes infatuated with a woman he has One Sunday morning, Joe's discovers the body of a local out- glanced briefly, driving by in a taxi. Boyd extends the armour fitter in the woodpile in his backyard. In the man's hand is an metaphor even further as Lorimer Black collects ancient (and of empty cooler, which has all the signs that it contained a small course expensive) helmets. When he accidentally traps his own animal. This local man is no stranger to Joe as in the first week head in his latest acquisition, he has to be freed by the local of his job Joe caught the outfitter, Ote Keeley, poaching deer. casualty department, a literal release prompting him to reclaim The confrontation, at the time, ended with Ote humiliating Joe his real self. If you watched the recent television production of by grabbing his gun away from him. this novel (adapted for the screen by Boyd), reading the book Joe immediately contacts the County Sheriff Bud Barnum and can seem like looking over a familiar script. There is an extra Barnum recalls that Ote had gone into the Bighorn Mountains sub-plot here concerning a rock musician who claims to have with two other men as part of a poaching ring. The Sheriff suffered a debilitating breakdown, but who manages to rebuild decides to send one of his deputies along with Joe and Wacey his career based on what he perceives and Black's other-world- Hedeman, a neighbouring game warden into the mountains to ly cool (a taste for esoteric music), but otherwise Boyd's TV bring back the other poachers. When they arrive at the camp- translation was faithful to the original. site they find that the other guides have been murdered and a It appears that Boyd has not lost his taste for oddball charac- local vagrant (who was killed at the campsite when the rangers ters, far flung geographical locations and a long historical per- opened fire) is accused of the murders. spective. April sees the publication of a new novel Any Human The case seems closed but Joe is not entirely happy and he Heart: The Intimate Journals Of Logan Mountstuart, another fic- has many questions unanswered. These questions and espe- tional autobiography which promises to take us on a global jour- cially their answers will not only affect Joe but serious jeopard- nal through the twentieth century. Even after reading ten of his ize his life and that of his family. books in quick succession, my appetite is whetted rather than This is the first novel by C. J. Box and will probably end up on satiated and I shall be joining the queues as the checkout. numerous shortlists for best first novel. The plot, in my opinion, is interesting but quite thin and although it discusses many A Complete list of the works of William Boyd issues such as environmentalism, big industry and the struggle to do the right thing in life it doesn't cover any new ground. A Good Man in Africa (1982) What makes this story stand out is the author's description of An Ice-Cream War (1983) remote wilderness (similar to Steve Hamilton's A Cold Day in On The Yankee Station (1984) Paradise) and his character development. This is definitely true Stars and Bars (1985) of Joe. Some people would (cruelly) describe him as slow but is School Ties (1986) in fact quite sharp, deeply loyal, and very stubborn and has a The New Confessions (1988) devotion to his family above all else. The portrayal of his wife, Brazzaville Beach (1991) his daughters (especially his eldest, Sheridan) are equal believ- The Blue Afternoon (1995) able while the lesser characters and equally convincing. Alas The Destiny of Nathalie X and Other Stories (1997) though there were not enough potential villains and the dia- Armadillo (1998) logue sometimes sags. Box has heaps of potential for the future and many others would be proud of this as a first novel. One To be published in April 2002 by Hamish-Hamilton is William final thing I would like to say about this book is that it's the first Boyd's new novel, Any Human Heart: The Intimate Journals Of book of possible hundreds of mystery titles that I have read Logan Mountstuart (priced at £17.99.) where I guessed both the villain and the reasons why the This is the story of Logan Mountstuart, told through his inti- crimes were committed about half way in. I'm still not sure if mate journals. His life spans the 20th century and his travels this is a good thing or a bad one. The writing, though, was crisp take the reader from Uruguay to Oxford, Paris, the Bahamas, enough to keep me interested in the characters until the very New York and Africa. We meet his three wives, and notaries and quite shocking end. from the worlds of royalty and literature. Published my Putnam, $23.95 and is available from Amazon, Adrian Crime in Store and can be ordered from any leading bookshop. reviews book

proper feel for Matt and his past I would start earlier. Some fans say that new readers should start with either the fifth or sixth novels (Eight Million Ways To Die and When The Sacred Ginmill Closes.) Starting with these novels you are introduced straight away with the brilliance of Block's writing but they miss out on Matt's alcoholism. For me you have to start with the first book (The Sins Of The Fathers) to get a true feeling for the world of Matthew Scudder. For those who do wish to begin at the beginning, Orion has just published the first three Matt Scudder novels in a very attractive trade paperback entitled The Matt Scudder Mysteries Volume I: The Sins Of The Fathers/ In The Midst Of Death/ Time To Murder And Create priced at a very reason- able £10.99 and available in any major or specialist bookshop.

The Best Reads of 2001 Block, Orion, £16.99

If I had any choice in the matter I would love to make a home for Below I have compiled a list of what I consider to have been the myself in New York. After numerous trips to this city it is one best books that I personally read in 2001. Not all books were place I feel totally comfortable both with the people and the published in 2001 but they were read over the past year. I would town itself. Over this past year I have read numerous novels love to hear from anyone who has a similar list or if anyone (especially mysteries) which take place in this city and its five wishes to write in with the title of their favourite book of the boroughs. I can say that the best writer, in my mind, who man- past 12 months at [email protected]. All the books below are ages to get a grip, not just now but for the last four decades, on available through Amazon or in the many bookshops through- the vibrant cosmopolitan and dark side of this city is the writer out London. Any of which that are out of print are indicated of the Matt Scudder series, Lawrence Block. with a star(*). A prominent and well-to-do New York City couple, Bryne and Susan Hollander, returning to their Upper West Side apartment All fifteen Matt Scudder mysteries (especially When The on a fine summer day are brutally murdered by two thieves and Sacred Ginmill Closes, Out On The Cutting Edge, A Walk their bodies are discovered a few hours later by their daughter, Among The Tombstone, well all of them) - Lawrence Block Kristin. The Later Elvis Cole novels (Indigo Slam and LA Requiem), A few days later the murderers are found dead in a Brooklyn Demolition Angel and Hostage - Robert Crais apartment. The likelihood is that their deaths resulted from a Right As Ram and Hell To Pay - George Pelecanos murder/suicide after a falling out. To the police this is an open- Pest Control and Cross Dressing - Bill Fitzhugh and-shut case but the couple's niece has her suspicions that The City And The Pillar - Gore Vidal their daughter, who inherits a fortune with their deaths, is The Debt To Pleasure - John Lanchester involved somehow. She relays these doubts to Matt Scudder Open Season - C J Box who decides to look at the case for her and of course he discov- The first four Stephanie Plum Novels (One For The Money, Two ers more than just a simple robbery/murder. For The Dough, Three To Get Ready and Four To Score) - Janet In this the fifteenth Scudder novel, the former alcoholic PI is Evanovich very different from the young man that was introduced 30 years The Hot Rock - Donald E Westlake ago. Scudder has aged with each book (he is now 61) and so his All Seven Myron Bolitar novels (especially Fade Away, Deal reactions, both physical and mental, are not as quick as they Breaker and One False Move) and Tell No One - Harlan Coben once were. He has mellowed over the years and works more Parnall Hall - Detective(*) with the police than once he did. The Kenzie and Gennaro novels (especially A Drink Before The Hope to Die has many of the familiar characters that we have War and Darkness, Take My Hand) and Mystic River - Dennis been introduced to in previous novels such as Elaine, Mick Lehane Ballou and TJ. Block writes about the people and their actions The first four Harry Bosch novels (The Black Echo, The Black with shocking reality as he does with New York itself. Ice, The Concrete Blonde and The Last Coyote) and The Poet - Like with all Scudder novels, I can find no faults with this Michael Connelly novel and it would seem that Lawrence Block is as good a writer as when he started out many years ago. Here's hoping 2002 is as good a literary year as 2001 was. Note: Hope to Die can be read as a stand alone but to get a Jonathan IC's new Wine Tasting, fLeal Ale and Cocktail Society

7.30 p.m. Tuc/day 22nd January dBV, ICU Ground Ploor Pree Entry coffee break

Crossword by Turnip Henry & Wailer Ned 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Across: Down: i. Dave ran around the 1. Museum that Felix edi- terrace. (7) tor left. (7) 9~" 5. Devil sounds like girl's 2. Tracks deportement in pelt. (7) train. (7,8) 9. They'll clear your 3. Goat au pair? (5) 10 11 tubes! (8,7) 4. Mental help seeker? 10. Reserves west of New (6) York look brown. (5) 5. Legally replete is left 11. Charge in breast is awful! (6) 15 16 implicit! (5) 6. Sounds like big-cat 17 12. Green fruit turned to lost its tail. What a fid- grin? (5) dle! (5) 18 i19 20 15. Bone decomposes in 7. Alors, je brighten your old house. (3,3) shine, no? (6, 9) 21 22 23 16. River contains very 8. I hear flower con- 24 25 26 quiet teat. (6) sumed prize. (7) 17. Maces whirl around 12. Mark reserves in sin. summits. (5) (5) 18. All hip abount mem- 13. Sexually librated dec- 27 bers! (6) laration in verse! (5) 19. Peace-keepers swal- 14. English student union low. Back, and with- takes drug to follow? 28 29 draw! (6) (5) 21. Sodium on French life 18. Foggy dish? (3-4) Hello! It is I, Wailer Ned, back for a special crossword, which could be is rather innocent. (5) 20. More innocent, and full the only good thing about term starting on a Wednesday. Turnip Henry 24. Drugged episode is of of chlorophyll. (7) and I have crafted this grid from only the finest materials - the black is an anchor. (5) 22. I start with a canvas! organically harvested from sustainable deep-space, and the white is 26. State your penchant! (6) practically scraped off the Angels' laundry. (5) 23. Hoover in space? That Unfortunately, Dr Hot Pudge is still deliquescing over some confection 27. Good speaker gives sucks! (6) or other and Bobby Cyclops probably got lost on his way back to college good fellatio? (4, 11) 25. Skiing drunkenly. (5) due to parallax problems. Hopefully, we'll have retrieved our errant cof- 28. Prologue gives ulterior 26. Educate bridal wear? fee break composers by the time you join us next week. Despite their motive. (7) (5) absence, we fully intend that completion of this crossword will qualify 29. One who matures you for entry into the grand prize draw at the end of the year. If not, it'll blokes is in charge. (7) probably qualify you for entry into Dr Hot Fudge -1 hear he's not choosy. PATIENT PARTICIPATION GROUP MEETING Neither Turnip nor I have the faintest idea what the answers were for at Imperial College Health Centre Southside, Prince's the previous crossword inflicted on the populace. My advice is to guess, Gardens on Tuesday 12th February 2002 from 1 - 2 p.m. with the general rule that an X rarely follows a C, and that we would All patients are welcome to attend our Patient never consider using a word unacceptable to the Pope. Apart from 'slip- Participation Group Meeting. This will offer an opportunity pery', which is clearly a totally disgusting word. G'Night. to talk to the doctors and nurses here about any issues of Wailer Ned concern or interest in relation to the Health Centre. sport active

ERASMUS Take The Cup

On a cold winter's morning 16 eted spot in the quarterfinals. saw Sikh Soc thrash the Thais gave as good as they got and teams descended on Hackney Surprise team of the Cup were 4-0 (including a blistering hat- responded with a cracking to vie for glory in the Overseas undoubtedly Thai Soc whose trick from Player of the equaliser having gone 1-0 Students' Committee (OSC) 5-a- intricate passing and lighting Tournament - Parveiz Petkar) down. side football tournament. speed saw them all the way to leaving Sikh 'keeper Stuart ERASMUS though left a little in Luckily Jack Frost had no say as the semis. "Singh" Coleman without hav- reserve going ahead with two the competition took place Little praise could be given to ing to make a save. classic strikes, which would indoors at the beautiful Space the OSC Exec team; they were The second semi saw ERAS- not look out of place in next Leisure Centre and no team described by some as being in MUS continuing with their solid summers World Cup in could afford to be "spaced out" the midst of a "Manchester brand of football to grind out a Japan/South Korea. They as each of the four groups was United style" crisis. Having 2-0 victory over the decidedly weathered late pressure from as tough as the next. assembled an all-star line up, frustrated Turkish side. And so the Sikh side well surviving a Hot favourites Sikh Soc were including three of last year's the final saw ERASMUS line up last minute disallowed equalis- the first to stamp their authori- Afro Caribbean Society win- against the as-yet-unbeaten er and the tantrums of Sikh Live ty on proceedings with a ners, a series of ludicrous errors Sikh Soc team. Wire Vishaal Chhatralia (EE2) thumping 8-3 victory in the a la Messers Barthez and Cole The third-fourth play-off was eventually running out 3-2 win- very first game, if variety is the meant that going into their last naturally a low-key affair with ners and champions of the tour- spice of life then this contest game they were without a the tired looking Thai side nament. was to be a Real Masala. ERAS- point. Only a last minute 1-0 going down 3-0. This left all The real winner in this affair MUS too, one of the newest winner against Indian Soc eyes focused on Court 1 for the was the OSC, celebrating their additions to the OSC group, saved their blushes as both Grande Finale where much largest ever sporting event and were looking strong blending crashed out. was expected of the two final- providing high expectations for football styles from across And so after much delicious ists; and neither failed to disap- next year's contest as well as Europe to dazzling effect. soccer, the last 4 teams still point. Both teams shook of their for International Night (Feb 7th Towards the end of the group standing were ERASMUS, Thai tiredness to contest the match ) - a celebration of the many stage things were reaching Soc, Sikh Soc and Turkish of the tournament. Sikh Soc, overseas cultures at ICU - see boiling point, with everyone Society - the real dark horses of despite not having any substi- you there! fighting tooth and nail for a cov- the tournament. The first semi tutes for the whole competition Shovi

Live sport on the BIG SCREEN Wrestlemania This winter saw the brave moment when they could Sunday 13th Jan. members of the Imperial strike the killing blow, and Southampton v Man Utd 2pm College Mixed Mud Wrestling render the other one topless. Team (ICMMWT) intrepidly Using a cunning manoeuvre Arsenalv - j^taerpool \^{§m setting out into the arctic learnt in 'Nam, Lindsey soon bdr-^pciif^^rd^.:.rio^H\ wastes of North Wales to got the upper hand, ripping engage in combat on the peak the flimsy fabric of her oppo- of Snowdon, where they were nent's bodice asunder like so to obliterate all opposition to much moist tissue paper. Wednesday 16th Jan gain the title of 'Dirtiest Little The next round saw James Monkeys In The World'. 'Dirty Dirty' Saffin demolish F.A. Cup 3rd Replay/ This was no easy task, how- poor Odin 'Dirty Dirty Dirty' teams to bf confirmed / ever, having to take on the Watts, for another 8 points to (see posters for details) cream of the world's crop of the ICMMWT, and this lead mud wrestlers, but one that was built upon by Penny j Want to watch any the ICMMWT faced with guts 'Filthy, Dirty, Filthy, Little and determination. Monkey' Moomin, whose top- @the*c*p©rts;i €Ow@*4ic|c? j The first bout saw Lindsey ripping technique was unsur- Jwst <