AN ADAPTATION GROUP FOR MIDDLE-AGED CLIENTS FROM THE FORMER

ADELE NIKOLSKY Coordinator of the Russian Program, Madeleine Borg Community Services Clinic of the Jewish Board of Family and Children's Services, Brooklyn, New York

Emigres from the former Soviet Union are able to participate in group therapy if the group process is not initiated by the leader but is a spontaneous byproduct of some more emotionally neutral process, such as lectures or group activities. The goal of the group described in this article was to help its middle-aged members break out of their isolation and adapt to their new country. To reach this goal, several modalities were applied in tum and together—lectures, regular group process, cultural activities, and finally transi­ tion to a self-help group.

This wasn Y, as it might seem, another lost crisis after emigration. These women's generation. This W(3S the only generation of ability to share was limited ottiy to informa­ Russians that found itself. tion on community resources they all were Joseph Brodsky interested in, such as legal aid, child care Less Than One (1986, p. 29) facilities, and the like. On the other hand, there has been a posi­ t present, mental health clinics serving tive experience in a group for battered A:lients from the former Soviet Union women from the FSU that was run by (FSU) have to cope with often overwhelm­ NY ANA. However, all these group mem­ ing numbers of middle-aged immigrants bers had had an opportunity to develop a presenting with symptoms of high anxiety good rapport and trustfiil relationship with and depression. The majority of these cli­ the leader in individual therapy with her ents need psychotropic medication for pro­ conducted before the group began. Our ad­ longed periods of time. Although indi­ aptation group needed to be more inclusive. vidual psychodynamic therapy concentrat­ One helpftil clue was found in a success- ing on the mourning of losses and their pos­ fill time-limited educational group for par­ sible repair has proven to be quite effective ents from the FSU held under the auspices for these clients, the need to provide effi­ ofthe Jewish Family Services of Boston cient help to large numbers of these clients (Irene Belozersky, personal commuitica- necessitated an attempt to use the group tion). This group discussed major problem­ modality. And, in fact, it seemed appropri­ atic areas of parenting for emigre parents. ate to work through the emigration prob­ The group leader encouraged the parents to lems together with peers for whom this ex­ ask questions. In the course of spontaneous perience also happened to be traumatizing. discussions the parents started to share their Anna Halberstadt and Lena Mandel difficulties and to receive the support of (1989), describing their experience in lead­ group members. ing a psychotherapy group of Soviet emigre It seemed that the group process became widows, concluded that the suspiciousness possible because sharing was not a formal and hosttiity characteristic of the emigre goal of the group and was not demanded by commuruty did not let group members share the group leader. Seen by these clients as their feelings. This author had a similar an authority figure, the group leader is im­ discouraging experience with a group of mediately associated by Soviet enugres with young mothers whose marriages went into forced ideological indoctrination, which

316 An Adaptation Group for Middle-Aged Clients / 317 was always done in groups. In contrast, make, and the owner of a soccer ball was this group process spontaneously developed consideted a bourgeois. The coats and un­ on the members' own irutiative and evolved derwear that we wore were cut out by our as a byproduct of an emotionally neutral mothers from our fathers' uniforms and process, in this case lectures. patched drawers: exit Sigmund Freud. So Relying on this positive experience, a we did not develop taste fot possessions.... time-limited educational group for middle- We nevet had a lOom of out own to lure our aged emigres was planned. It was to cover girls into, nor did our girls have rooms. Our topics related to three main areas: (1) psy­ love affairs were mostly walking and talking chological problems at different stages of affairs; it would make an astronomical sum if the immigrant's adaptation; (2) differences we were charged for mileage....We never in American and Soviet views and values had what are called "material stimuh"....If concerning family roles, education, money, somebody sold himself out, it was not for the the role of work, and religion; and (3) prob­ sake of goods or comfort: there were none. lems of identity—as a person from the FSU, He was selling out because of iimer want and as a Soviet Jew, and as a new American he knew that himself (Table 1). The initial group had 18 members who These recent emigres shared several com­ were from 50 to 65 years of age. All were mon features: professionals from the large cities, mainly from the and Belarus. There were • They had felt a part and a parcel of the also a few Moscovites and former residents Soviet system, believed in the Soviet ide­ of St. Petersburg. ology, identified with it, and learned to succeed in it. THE PSYCHOLOGICAL PROFILE OF • As a rule, they had neither much motiva­ THE GROUP tion nor much preparation for emigra­ tion. They either felt forced to follow the These group members belong to the genera­ families of their children or fled from tion born and raised in the Stalin years fear of the total impoverishment that be­ when the Soviet totalitarian society was in came the fate of their generation under full force. Yet, their youth coincided with perestroika, with its economic chaos, the "thaw" of post-Stalinism when the rampant inflation, rising anti-Semitism, country was slowly opening to the world, and nationalist wars. when repression subsided, and the Commu­ • They encountered a tight American job nist ideology started to lose its power over market. Their quite poor health nar­ the Soviet population. The Nobel Prize- rowed their chances for successful em­ wirming poet Joseph Brodsky (1986, p. 18) ployment even further. wrote about this—his own—^generation: • They had successful careers in the past and had built their identities mainly We emerged from under the post-war rubble around their roles at work. The loss of when the state was too busy patching its own social status after emigration was a dev­ skin and could not look after us very well. astating blow to their self-esteem. We entered schools, and whatever elevated • All experienced psychological problems rubbish we were taught there, the suffering of varying severity in these initial peri­ and poverty were visible all around. The ods of adaptation. empty windows gaped at us like skulls' or­ bits, and as httle as we were, we sensed In addition the former citizens of Ukraine tragedy....The amount of goods was very and Belams had experienced the Chernobyl hmited, but not having known otherwise, we catastrophe accompaitied by widespread ra- did not mind it. Bikes were old, of prewar

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Table 1. Discussion Topics of the Adaptation Group

1. DiffCTent reasons for emigration (economic reasons; safety; psychological reasons: separation; uniting fac­ tor for unstable famihes; realization of creative potential; marginality; criminality). How a decision on emi­ gration was made? hiitiator of emigration.

2. Emigrants and refugees. Personal features ofweU-ad^tingemigi ants: positive attitude toward risk taking; ability to be alone and/or ability to easily connect with people; cujiosity; love of changes.

3. Stages of emigration. • Transit places and time in transit. • Initial stage of resettlement. Main task—satisfaction of physi':;al needs. Psychological aspects: possible changes in family roles; "division of labor" between one masti=ring the new life and one keeping ties with the past (together they provide a needed mix ofthe old and new). Drfenses: eiq)horia, nostalgic idealization of the past, withdrawal

4. Need for mourning of emigration losses. Refusal to mourn as a reason for crisis in later stages of resettle­ ment.

5. hnageof America and Americans before the emigration and after it. Pre-emigrationcUched ideas of fiiture adulation: "I'U leam language just by hving there," "I am ready to do any work," "children will ad^t as easily as fish swims in wata-," "I'll solve all my personal problems there," "Everyone is well-to-do there," "our children wiU get excellent education," "American medicine can cure any illness," etc. Rqection ofthe realistic feedback information fi-om those who left earher. How Americans see the Russian emigrants? Our feelings regiirding their attitude to us. How we see Americans?

6. Our Jewidi identity. What meant for you to be a Jew in the Soviet IMon? Differences in preservation of Jewidi traditions in different areas ofthe FSU, in famihes of different social stratas and cultural background. diation-disease phobia and real deteriora­ separations caused by emigration. tion ofthe population's health. As children When the thirteen weeks were coming to during the Nazi occupation they suffered an end, the group anxiously searched for a through evacuation under fire, witnessed way to continue its work together as the atrocities, or even lived in concentration members had reached some degree of cohe­ camps. Some lost numerous family mem­ sion and mutual trust and felt the need to bers in . Yet, this past in­ continue their discussions. The group cluded not only hardships but also pride for recontratrted as an open-ended psycho­ their victorious country and admiration for therapy iP"oup. In the course ofthe next their soldier fathers and their enduring five months the group members worked mothers. through their early feelings of deprivation, their losses, and their identity confiision as STAGES IN THE LIFE OF THE GROUP Jewish members of a mass society indoctri­ nated in Communist theories who had a Originally, the group was to meet for thir­ weak and negative Jewish identity. teen sessions, each having its own topic of After this time, the group recontracted discussion as shown in Table 1. The thera­ again for a three-month transitional period pist hoped to realize these three goals dur­ during which the center of gravity shifted ing these sessions: (1) normalization ofthe first to discussions of separations and losses clients' feelings about their emigration ex­ both in their families and in the life of their perience, (2) familiarization ofthe ctients group. Later, the repair of losses became with the values of a democratic society and the central theme of discussions and group group rules reflecting these values, and (3) activities. beginning ofthe mourning of losses and

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In this period some time was devoted to difficult also were discussed. reorganization of this therapy group into a self-help group. 1 informed the group about Normalization of the Emigration the self-help group movement and the mles Experience of these groups. The group established its In group discussion, emigration was de­ new mles and elected its oflHcers. scribed as a process well known to human­ Having celebrated its first anniversary, ity from time immemorial. The exile of the group continues to meet once a month at Adam and Eve from paradise was only the the chnic. Some group members have first symbol of migration (Grinberg & formed enduring friendships. Grinberg, 1989). Losses of the familiar, the Three important aspects of the group habitual way of life, of security are the high process are described in detad below: (1) price of this change. On the other hand, working through the emigradon experience, migrants are free to explore and populate (2) dealing with the group members' identi­ new lands, buUd a new life for themselves ties as individuals formed by a totalitarian and their children, and to participate in cre­ society and as , and (3) the group's ation as symbolized in the Bible by the do­ transition to American society. mestication of plants and animals. Group member Rakhil's remark expressed the WORKING THROUGH THE common feeling of the group: "If even EMIGRATION EXPERIENCE Adam and Eve were emigrants, so we Emigration from the Object Relations should manage somehow!" Point of View Loss and Abandonment Leon and Rebecca Grinberg, in their Psy­ choanalytic Perspectives on Migration and Loss was a prominent theme of group dis­ Exile (1989), compare emigres losing their cussions. Patriotism was expressed very country with children separated for too long frequently, and emigration was perceived as from their caring object; they lack a mother forced. 'They don't let me love Russia and to allay their anxieties: 'The new country Ukraine, which I loved," complained is unknown and cannot always offer.. con­ Rakhil. Mark said, "We lost our country tainment and support he had hoped for or not only through emigration but through the idealized in his expectations" (Grinberg & change. The country I have lived in does Grinberg 1989, p. 15). The emigre feels not exist anymore." excluded, homesick, and lonely, undergoing Fear of further losses and abandonment ego disorgaruzation. The process of adapta­ was expressed in the group's life. Any tion is seen by the authors as ego reorgani­ member's absence from the meeting or the zation, which is mastered by some individu­ therapist's vacation caused anxiety, sadness, als faster than by others. This capacity for and suspicion of being abandoned. These reorganization is connected by the authors emotions became an issue, and the group with the ability to be alone, conceptualized eventually understood the connection of by D. Winnicott (1958). This capacity de­ these feelings in the here and now with pends on whether a person was able to in­ their past numerous losses. ternalize a "good enough" mother, respon­ sive but not smothering, and how he or she Problems of Separation was able to master aggression and jealousy. Their own children's possible independence In the group discussions, feelings of ex­ was seen by the group members only in clusion and humiliation were frequently ex­ negative terms: as reflecting their neglect pressed. Natural curiosity, the ability to of their children and their children's aban­ make new friends, and other personal quali­ donment of them as aging parents. Their ties that make emigration easier or more

SUMMER 1996 Journal of Jewish Communal Service / 320 memories of their childhoods as full of ing adults or just wanted to protect our chil­ hardships and deprivadons strengthened dren from tiie hard and dangerous wodd. their determination to protect their children Borukh instead switched to his own ejqieri- from these experiences. In the FSU, such ence—how his poor and hard-working par­ protection and help used to be expressed by ents wanted to protect him from hardships giving financial assistance, pulling strings but could not do too much. He had to move to get their children a state apartment or fiom his shtefl to a big city and fight for him­ giving them money to buy a cooperative self. The therapist acknovy4edged that the apartment, babysitting standing in line for memory of our own deptivations did not let consumer goods, or getting them through us to permit our children to take their own connections. Thus, the economy built on nsks in life. the shortage of consumer goods and on the rewards of seniority strengthened paternal­ At the same time, the group members had a ism in the Soviet family. Consider this case clear understanding of stdl being on duty as example. members of the "sandwich generation"— being already nuddle aged but still having Shuia even today comes regnlady to clean obligations to their children and to their her daughter's apartment. The daughter is a fragile parents. smgle woman of 29. She does not work long hours, nor is she physically frail in any way. Rakhil's hardships are an example. She held But Shura holds onto this help with cleaning a job, helped raise her grandchildren, and to feel that she can still contribute to her looked after her elderly parents. Under this daughter's well-being and, by the way, to stress she became depressed, regressed into watch what's going on in her daughter's life agorapholna, and developed many physical and to advise her, i.e., to treat her still as a ailments. The group members commiserated chUd. with her and advised her to set some limits on the help given to her parents, which she, Thus, members had difBculty seeing their to some degree, was able to do. Ninel and children as separate persons with their own Nma, as the group eventuaUy learned, were needs and desires. As this theme was ex­ at this pomt in their life hving only with their tremely painful for the group members, it mothers, both in their eighties, and were was discussed otdy in bits and pieces. their only caretakers. They found some sup­ port in the group but, even more, in each

One of the most important discussions in that other. respect was a meeting held after Rakhil had come back from visiting her married children A VIEW OF PEOPLE FROM A in San Francisco. She spoke about feeling TOTALITARIAN SOC3ETY ahve and joyful only there. The group and The group members were bom to parents the therapist vaUdated her feehngs. Audrey who lived through World War I, the Civil expressed envy as visiting his only daughter War, famines, collectivization, and Stalin \\lio was Uving in Israel was impossible for purges—social calamities comparable in financial reasons. devastation to the Nazis' terror of World Lev shared that he had come to the pain- War II. Here are examples of their back­ fiil conclusion that in this country it would grounds: be better to let adult children to have their own way. Shura and Mark bitterly spoke Shraga, a woman fiom Vilnius, was de­ about the lack of concern for them on the ported, as a child with her family fiom part of their children. The therapist raised Lithuania to Sibetia when her country was the question whether we wanted to raise car­ taken over by flie USSR in 1939 after tiie

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Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact; Lev, Andrey, Passivity and Helplessness Shura, and Mark lost their fathers in the war; According to Bruno Bettelheim (1960), Ninel and Nina for several years waited anx­ these traits are induced by constant threats iously to leam whether their fathers woidd of punishment rather than punishment it­ retum or perish at the front; Borukh was bom self This situation causes childlike feelings in an Ukrainian labor camp where he hved of helplessness and fills people with impo­ the first two years of his life; Mark and his tent rage, which is disastrous for an adult brother hved in an orphanage for several personality years because their widowed mother could For example, after meeting for four not support them; Ninel, Shura, and Mark months the group decided that it wanted to shared memories of long periods when they were preoccupied with feelings of hunger; engage in some cultural activities together. and Lev witnessed numerous deaths wiien They decided to see the Metropolitan Mu­ the Nazis bombed their barge even though it seum of Art and requested that I accompany bore a Red Cross flag. them. I saw this desire as a restorative step and wanted to support it. We agreed that the group members should take on them­ Because of such experiences, it was essen­ selves the logistics of arranging the trip tial to address the problems in making the from their Brooklyn homes to the museum. transition from a totalitarian society to one This seemingly easy task proved to be too requiring independence and more demo­ hard for these former professionals and cratic and more mutually respectfiil inter­ middle-level managers. Only four people personal relationships. Even the establish­ out of twelve were able to come, a subgroup ment of such general rules as confidendality of more functional members. Their at­ and safety from personal questions sent a tempts to assist members unable to travel message of treating others with respect and independently were half-hearted. set the stage for introducing new, more These four group members enjoyed their democratic attitudes. excursion. At the next group meeting, the other members expressed their embarrass­ Equality versus Hierarchy ment and shamefiilly spoke of their help­ One important feature of a mass society is lessness that prevented them from coming. its complicated hierarchy of groups with With their typical ambivalence, they wanted different levels of power and privileges to continue these excursions, but did not be­ (Bettelheim, 1960). In our adaptation lieve in their ability to organize their travel; group, we could expect the establishment of they hinted that 1 better meet them at the a hierarchy by cities of origin and by career clinic and take them to the city. I supported achievements. For example, in my experi­ their desire to see places, but insisted on ence working with another such group, a them assuming their share of responsibility. highly successfiil professor of engineering Later the group made two more trips—to listed all his achievements in front of in­ the Museum of Modern Art and to Soho timidated group members, who then refused galleries. They finally were able to orga­ to continue their group treatment after this nize their travels more independently. "show." These contacts with the cultural richness of To prevent such a scenario from recur­ New York were important steps in restora­ ring, I addressed directly "our" Soviet habit tion of their cultural life and gave them a of putting down others while establishing a message of openness and accessibility of hierarchy of power and success. I tried to this fascinating new culture. join my clients as another former member ,After eight months, because of adminis­ of a totalitarian society formed by the same trative regulations, the group members had forces. to choose between the group and individual

SUMMER 1996 Journal of Jewish Communal Service / 322 therapy. The majority were still on medica­ from anti-Semitism, but never paid much tion and suffering from depressive symp­ attention to other victims of the system. toms. They were not able to abandon their Their views may be seen as a rationalization individual treatment but expressed sadness of their identification with the aggressor about losing the group. I offered to help state that rewarded them with some degree them make a transition to a self-help group of power and safety. if they chose to do so. Still, these group members said that they Characteristically, the group had diffi­ felt ashamed of themselves. The poet culty making this choice. On one hand, Brodsky (1986, p. 10) describes it thusly: they did not believe in themselves. "It will be boring," predicted Shura, an energetic That is the ultimate triumph of the system: industrial manager in the past. "You'll see, whether you beat it or join it, you feel without you no one will come," added equally guilty... Ambivalence, 1 think, is the Ninel. Rakhil believed that they needed a chief characteristic of my nation. There isn't leader who knew more about this new life a Russian executioner who isn't scared of than the group members. turning victim one day, nor is there a sorriest On the other hand, "the authorities" had victim who would not acknowledge (if only suggested the seff-help group and they bet­ to himself) a mental abiUty to become an ex­ ter be obeyed. In this way, paradoxically, ecutioner. the independent activities of these depen­ dent people were spurred—in a typically This feeling of humiliation accompanied Russian manner—from above, just like our group members into emigration. Here Gorbachev's perestroika. Now, six months they came too late in life to succeed, and the after the clinical group's termination, the stresses of emigration sped up their aging seff-help group stdl meets monthly. process. Because they saw themselves as unable to contribute to the society by work, PROBLEMS OF IDENTITY they felt like redundant "nobodies," as their main identification had been through work. "We are nobodies, we are sovki" Lev once Their aging and regression due to illness in­ said bitterly (sovki is the plural form of creased their fear of independence. After sovok, a rather derogatory name for a typi­ many discussions, Shraga said, "If we knew cal person from the FSU). In the past, al­ in advance that there would be no way not most all these people shared a belief in the to work, we would adapt better, we would Communist system, were part of it, and suc­ learn English faster." Many members be­ ceeded in it. Now they felt ashamed of their lieve that the fear of losing benefits para­ past beliefs. Rakhil and Manya felt that lyzed their efforts to find a job. they had no way to know better as they did A "negative Jewish identity," a term not belong to intellectual circles where the coined by late Edgar Goldstein (1984) is forbidden literature circulated. Lev, Mark, now accepted as typical for Soviet Jews. It and Audrey saw their conformity as an ex­ stems from ignorance of the Jewish culture, pression of their loyalty to their fathers who as well as the perception that one's had died in World War II for our Soviet Jewishness was the source of negative influ­ motherland. However, in the end, they all ences on life. Again Brodsky (1986, p. 8-9) feh servde to the system. eloquently describes this phenomenon: According to Bruno Bettelheim (1960), the totalitarian system suppresses its citi­ I was ashamed of the word "Jew"—in Rus­ zens' powers of reasoning and observation sian, "yevrey—regardless of its connota­ and demands that they ignore the mistreat­ tion. In printed Russian "yevrey" appears ment of others. The group members fre­ nearly as seldom as, say, "mediastinum" or quently spoke about their own sufferings "gennel" in American Enghsh. In fact, it

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also has something hke the status of a four- and change. Borukh, Lev, and Shura wist- letter word or like a name for a VD...I al­ fiiUy expressed the desire to be accepted as ways felt a lot eaaer with a Russian equiva­ they were. The need to adapt, to change lent of ""—"zhyd"...It was clearly of­ was perceived as another expression of their fensive. All this is not to say that 1 suffered servility, now to the democratic society. as a Jew at that tender age; it's simply to say Wearing a mask is one of the defenses that my first he had to do with my identity. used by individuals in a totalitarian society. This is just one example of the tnnmiing It was dangerous to express genuine feel­ ofthe self that ...bred in us such an over­ ings, to stand out, or to be conspicuous in powering sense of ambivalence that in ten any way. Our group members expressed years we ended up with a willpower in no awareness about their need to wear a mask. way superior to a seaweed. The core of group process—the sharing of feelings—seemed impossible and unneces­ The majority of the group members shared sary in the beginning. "I'll not participate these feelings. The group discussions of in this strip tease of the soul," Lev an­ their Jewish identity always were permeated nounced in disgust. "Don't believe that we by feelings of exclusion and humiliation. say all the tmth," warned Gennady. "We Many times they spoke with regret of their are hiding behind many screens." Still, the ignorance of Jewish culture and, in fact, felt group process took off, and many painfiil persecuted just for one word in their pass­ feelings were shared eventually. At termi­ ports. In the United States, their ignorance nation, the group members spoke several alienated them from the American Jewish times about having become closer and car­ community. ing about each other, just because they now When discussing choices for the fiiture. knew more about each other. Still, some Lev spoke of his desire to leam more about members continued to express the desire not his Jewish heritage. Ninel chose the same to expose themselves. Ninel who some­ option. Yuriy had an opposite opinion: times shared her difficulties spontaneously 'There we had to suffer as Jews. And here later would become ashamed and fright­ we are given a chance to forget about being ened: "Now they all know how infantile I Jews, and I'll use this chance. I am an in­ am. I don't want to see these people any­ ternationalist, and want to be just an Ameri­ more." She continued to attend the group can, like anyone else. And this group is not and be active in the group process, but each the place to discuss Jewish cultural issues. time had to overcome a desire to hide, to cut If someone is interested in those, let them herself off this group. emoU in Torah studies." Earlier, Yuriy shared how his military career had been de­ PRACTICE ISSUES stroyed when he had not used an opporm- As the group leader, I was in many ways nity to register himself as a Christian Rus­ just like the group members: a middle-aged sian. He felt that he had paid too high a emigrant from the same country, speaking price for his almost nonexistent Jewish their language, who was formed by the identity. same society. I tried to strengthen this On the other hand, those group members identification by uniting with the group who came from areas where Jewish culture members: "we" spoke about "our prob­ had survived to some degree—Lithuania lems," "our difiSculties with our children," and tiny Ukrainian shtetls—felt less torn. and the like. It was both a way to permit In a totalitarian society an individual the clients to feel equal and respected and acts mainly under external pressure, so free­ an expression ofthe undeniable fact of hav­ dom in that society was often expressed by ing lived in the same country for forty group members as freedom from adaptation years.

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At the same time, I was seen as an au­ erations belonged to the past, in which such thority figure: as a professional and as an people would make dangerous any sincere "oldtimer" imnugrant. The group members conversation. Now all the group members expected my paternalistic protection and were just new emigrants struggling with help in exchange for their obedience. As their adjustment to their new society. Rakhil said while discussing a transition to self-help group, "No, nothing will come out CONCLUSION of it. We don't know this life, and thus The experience of this adaptation group caimot help each other. Someone should shows that emigrants from FSU are able to lead us into it by hand." Shura and Manya participate in group therapy, but on some said that they believed that without their conditions and with some limitations. The leader group meetings would become bor­ group process cannot be initiated by a group ing. leader, but rather must be a spontaneous My psychological interpretations were byproduct of some more emotionally neutral met with interest but often with disbelief process, such as lectures or activities. For example, after a painfiil conversation on Sharing is fiirther hmited by the fact that losses of relatives in the Holocaust, Ninel in the emigre community people know each suddenly switched a conversation to her other and are afraid of gossip. However, fight with roach infestation of her apart­ there was no breach of confidentiality in the ment. Extermination, aggression, and the entire year of this group's existence. failure to exterminate both people and in­ Usually, one important goal of group sects were connected in my interpretation, therapy is improvement of socialization which the group had difficulty accepting. skills and interpersonal relationships of its Lev hinted to his neighbor that I was going members. This group had a different crazy. It was said audibly enough for me to goal—to help people with adequate social hear, but was denied when I asked him to skills break out from their isolation in their discuss it. new country. In order to reach this goal, My feelings toward the group members several modalities were applied in turn and were mixed. On the one hand, I had a de­ together: lectures, regular group process, sire to help the group members work cultural activities, and, finally, transition to through their losses, to take a more active a self-help group. and positive stance in American society, Special attention should be paid to help­ and to help each other. On the other hand, ing the group operate in a more democratic it was genuinely hard for me to accept their way—with more mutual respect and with­ statements that they continued to believe in out snobbery and animosity. Such a group, Communist values through all these years if successful, becomes a school of better atti­ and that only emigration made them under­ tudes toward each other, which has a heal­ stand they had been deceived. Of course, I ing effect on recent emigrants in need of understood that their access to information support. was even more limited than mine as they The group was able to work through lived in provincial cities and did not know traumatic experiences of this generation. foreign languages. Still, I frequently won­ Emigration as the most recent stressful dered. Who of my clients had been a party event was addressed first. Then the group member in the past? Who possibly made turned its attention to their early depriva­ passionate ideological speeches at meet­ tions and wartime losses and then to the ings? Was any former KGB informant Chernobyl catastrophe. among us? These thoughts were not unique While mourning of losses was an impor­ to me, but besieged the group members too, tant part of our work, not less important as I knew from their individual therapy. I was the very intensive struggle around those had to remind myself that all these consid­

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qualities that they saw as connected to their heart: Autonomy in a mass age. Glencoe, being docile members ofthe mass society. IL: The Free Press. Their obedience, lack of initiative, and diffi­ Brodsky, Joseph. (1986). Less than one: Se­ culties making choices were adaptive or at lected essays. New York: Farra, Strauss, least tolerable qualities back in the FSU. and Giroux. Now they proved to l)e a hindrance, a source Goldstein, Edward. (1984). Homo Sovieticus of shame. in transition: Psychoanalysis and prob­ The need to change, to adapt to the new lems of social adjustment. Journal of the society was recognized, but caused ambiva­ American Academy of Psychoanalysis, lent feelings. After having worn all their 72(1). life a mask of conformity, many group Grinberg, Leon, & Grinberg, Rebecca. (1989). members saw adaptation not as a process of Psychoanalytic perspectives on migration searching for new values or an opportunity and exile. New Haven, CT: Yale Univer­ to develop new qualities and absorb a differ­ sity Press. ent culture, but rather as a need to form a Halberstadt, Anna, & Mandel, Lena. (1989). new mask to hide their old personality. Group psychotherapy with Soviet emi­ This need was resented. At the same time, grants. In David A. Halperin (Ed.), Group processes of genuine adaptation and repair psychodynamics: New paradigms and new also began. The group members were perspectives. Chicago: Yearbook Medical learning English, knew more about the Jew­ Publishers. ish heritage, and started to explore Ameri­ Hulewat, Phylhs. (1981). Dynamics of the can culture. All these complex and confiis- Soviet Jewish family: Its impact on chni­ ing changes were expressed and explored at cal practice for the Jewish family agency. group meetings. Journal of Jewish Communal Service, 48, Finally, this group provided its members 53-60. with an opportunity to socialize and even to Segal, Boris. (1983). The meeting of the So­ make new close friends in their new coun­ viet man with America. Novity Zhurnal, try. In many ways, the group meetings rep­ 3, 50-65. resented a transitional space—neither the Shvart, Yevgeniy. (1972). Dragon in Piesy. old, nor the new country but both of them at Sovetskiy Pisatel, Leningrad. the same time, which helped these emi­ Winnicott, Donald W. (1960). The matura- grants pose and look at their change of cul­ tional processes and the facilitating envi­ ture in safety and together. ronment. New York: International Uni­ versities Press. REFERENCES Yorke, Clifford. (1986). Reflections on the study of psychic trauma. Psychoanalytic Bettelheim, Brano. (1960). The informed Study ofthe Child, 41, 221-236.

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