A Confucian Defense of Shame: Morality, Self-Cultivation, and the Dangers of Shamelessness

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A Confucian Defense of Shame: Morality, Self-Cultivation, and the Dangers of Shamelessness religions Article Article Article A ConfucianA Confucian Defense Defense of Shame: of Shame: Morality, Morality, Self-Cultivation, Self-Cultivation, A Confucian Defense of Shame: Morality, Self-Cultivation, and theand Dangers the Dangers of Shamelessness of Shamelessness and the Dangers of Shamelessness Mark BerksonMark Berkson Mark Berkson Department of Religion,Department Hamline of Religion, University, Hamline St. Paul, University, MN 55104, St. USA;Paul, [email protected] 55104, USA; [email protected] Department of Religion, Hamline University, St. Paul, MN 55104, USA; [email protected] Abstract: ManyAbstract: philosophers Many and philosophers scholars in and the scholars West have in the a negative West have view a negative of shame. view In muchof shame. In much of Abstract: Many philosophers and scholars in the West have a negative view of shame.of post-classical In much ofpost-classical Western ethical Western thought, ethical shame thought, is compared shame is negativelycompared negatively with guilt, with as shame guilt, isas shame is asso- post-classical Western ethical thought, shame is compared negatively with guilt, asassociated shame is asso- withciated the “outer”, with the how “outer”, one appears how one before appears others before (and othe thusrs is (and merely thus a is matter merely of a “face”), matter of “face”), and ciated with the “outer”, how one appears before others (and thus is merely a matterand of “face”), guilt is and associatedguilt is associated with the “inner”with the realm “inner” of therealm conscience of the conscience and soul. and Anthropologists soul. Anthropologists and and philoso- guilt is associated with the “inner” realm of the conscience and soul. Anthropologistsphilosophers and philoso- havephers used have this used framework this framework to distinguish to distinguish more morally more evolved morally Western evolved “guilt Western cultures” “guilt cultures” from phers have used this framework to distinguish more morally evolved Western “guiltfrom cultures” Asian from “shameAsian cultures”. “shame cultures”. Many psychologists Many psychologists also have also a ha negativeve a negative view ofview shame, of shame, seeing seeing it as dam- Asian “shame cultures”. Many psychologists also have a negative view of shame, seeingit as damaging it as dam-aging to the to self the and self “devastatingand “devastating in its in consequences”. its consequences”. In thisIn this paper, paper, I argue I argue that that the the understand- aging to the self and “devastating in its consequences”. In this paper, I argue that theunderstandings understand-ings of shame of shame found found in these in these philosophers philosophers and and psychologists psychologists are misguided,are misguided, and and that that their flaws ings of shame found in these philosophers and psychologists are misguided, and theirthat their flaws flaws cancan be revealedbe revealed by lookingby looking at the at the understanding understanding of shameof shame in thein the classical classical Confucian Confucian tradition. In can be revealed by looking at the understanding of shame in the classical Confuciantradition. tradition. In In responseresponse to to philosophers philosophers whowho seesee shameshame as a a “l “lesser”esser” moral moral emotion emotion than than guilt, guilt, Confucius (孔子 response to philosophers who see shame as a “lesser” moral emotion than guilt, ConfuciusConfucius ( 孔子Kongzi) Kongzi) and and Mencius Mencius ( 孟子 Mengzi) willwill articulatearticulate an an understanding understanding of of shame shame that that has a deeply Kongzi) and Mencius (孟子 Mengzi) will articulate an understanding of shame thathas has a deeply a deeply internalinternal dimension dimension and and is moreis more essential essential in thein the process process of moralof moral cultivation cultivation than than guilt. guilt. In response internal dimension and is more essential in the process of moral cultivation than guilt.In response In response to theto the psychologists psychologists who who warn warn about about the the harm harm of shame, of shame, the the Confucians Confucians will will help help us us distinguish to the psychologists who warn about the harm of shame, the Confucians will helpdistinguish us distinguish betweenbetween moral moral and and pathological pathological shame, shame, showing showing us why us why the latter the latter is harmful, is harmful, but the but the former is between moral and pathological shame, showing us why the latter is harmful, butformer the former is something issomething that no that moral no person moral canperson be without. can be Iwithout. will show I will that theshow Confucian that the perspectiveConfucian perspective on something that no moral person can be without. I will show that the Confucianon perspective shame and on guiltshame is profoundlyand guilt is relevantprofoundly to therele historicalvant to the moment historical we moment are living we in are (particularly living in (particularly the shame and guilt is profoundly relevant to the historical moment we are living in (particularlythe years of theyears Trump of the Administration), Trump Administration), and that the and Confucian that the Confucian view demonstrates view demonstrates that there that is there is some- something much worse, and far more devastating, than shame in its consequences—shamelessness. years of the Trump Administration), and that the Confucian view demonstrates that there is some-thing much worse, and far more devastating, than shame in its consequences—shamelessness. thing much worse, and far more devastating, than shame in its consequences—shamelessness. Citation: Berkson, Mark. 2021. A Keywords: shame;Keywords: guilt; Confucius; shame; guilt; Mencius; Confucius; character Mencius; ethics; character moral emotions; ethics; moral virtue emotions; theory virtue theory Confucian Defense of Shame: Keywords: shame; guilt; Confucius; Mencius; character ethics; moral emotions; virtue theory Morality, Self-Cultivation,Citation: and Berkson, the Mark. 2020. A Citation: Berkson, Mark. 2020. A Dangers of Shamelessness.ConfucianReligions Defense of Shame: Confucian Defense of Shame: 12: 32. https://doi.org/10.3390/Morality, Self-Cultivation,1. Introduction and the 1. Introduction Morality, Self-Cultivation, and the rel12010032 Dangers of Shamelessness. Religions 1. Introduction Harriet LernerHarriet of the Menninger Lerner of Clinicthe Menninger wrote, “Shame Clinic is wrote, the most “Shame debilitating is the most emotion, debilitating emo- Dangers of Shamelessness. Religions 11: x. https://doi.org/10.3390/xxxxx the most devastating in its consequences” (Lerner 2019). Sources ranging from academic 11: x. https://doi.org/10.3390/xxxxx Harriet Lerner of the Menninger Clinic wrote,Received: “Shame 12 December is 2020the most debilitating emo-tion, the most devastating in its consequences” (Lerner 2019). Sources ranging from aca- psychology journals to popular parenting websites warn about the dangers and harms tion, the most devastating in its consequences”Accepted: (Lerner 31 December 2019).Received: 2020Sources 12 December ranging 2020 from aca-demic psychology journals to popular parenting websites warn about the dangers and of shame. Parents are told that it is wrong to make their child feel shame, a view that Received: 12 December 2020 demic psychology journals to popular parentingPublished: websites 5 January Accepted:warn 2021 about 31 December the 2020dangers andharms of shame. Parents are told that it is wrong to make their child feel shame, a view is consistent with the emphasis on cultivating self-esteem in children. Harvard Medical Accepted: 31 December 2020 harms of shame. Parents are told that it is wrong to make Published:their child 5 January feel 2021shame, a viewthat is consistent with the emphasis on cultivating self-esteem in children. Harvard Med- Published: 5 January 2021 that is consistent with the emphasis on cultivatingPublisher’s self-esteem Note: MDPI in stays children. neu- HarvardSchool’s HealthMed-ical website School’s featured Health apiece website byDr. featured Claire McCarthy,a piece by whoDr. writesClaire thatMcCarthy, “shaming who writes that ical School’s Health website featured a piecetral by with Dr. regard Claire to jurisdictionalPublisher’s McCarthy, Note: clai- MDPIwhois stays awrites bad neu- idea” that“shaming (McCarthy is a2020 bad). idea” The (McCarthy belief that 2020). shame The is abelief destructive that shame emotion is a destructive goes emotion Publisher’s Note: MDPI stays neu- “shaming is a bad idea” (McCarthy 2020). Thems belief in published that maps shametral and with institutio- is regard a destructive to jurisdictionalbeyond emotion the contextgoes beyond of parenting the context and of children, parenting and and many children, psychologists and many see psychologists shame as see shame as tral with regard to jurisdictional goes beyond the context of parenting and children,nal affiliations. and manyclaims psychologists in published mapsuniquely see and shame insti- harmful. asuniquely The Menningerharmful. The Clinic’s Menning 2019er John Clinic’s M. Oldham2019 John National M. Oldham Mental National Health Mental Health claims in published maps and insti- uniquely harmful. The Menninger Clinic’s 2019 John M. Oldhamtutional affiliations.National MentalSymposium Health wasSymposium dedicated was entirely dedicated to “The entirely Problem to “The of Shame” Problem (Menninger of Shame” Clinic (Menninger 2019).
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