© 2018 Porshé R. Garner
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© 2018 Porshé R. Garner PRESENT DAY PROPHETS: DEFINING BLACK GIRLHOOD SPIRITUALITY IN SAVING OUR LIVES HEAR OUR TRUTHS (SOLHOT) BY PORSHÉ RENEE GARNER DISSERTATION Submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree Doctor of Philosophy in Educational Policy Studies in the Graduate College of the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, 2018 Urbana, Illinois Doctoral Committee: Associate Professor Ruth Nicole Brown, Chair Professor James D. Anderson Professor Anne Haas Dyson Associate Professor Soo Ah Kwon Assistant Professor Safiya Noble, University of Southern California Abstract Present Day Prophets: Defining Black Girlhood Spirituality in Saving Our Lives Hear Our Truths (SOLHOT) and Beyond is based on nine years of participant observation in the collective, Saving Our Lives Hear Our Truths (SOLHOT). SOLHOT is a praxis that centers and celebrates Black girlhood through artistic and radical imagination for the purpose of otherworld making. Through the sharing of personal narrative, critically engaging scholarship at the intersection of Black feminism, Womanism, and Black Girlhood Studies, and theorizing from field experiences, this dissertation offers a definition of Black girlhood spirituality that demonstrates the necessity of studying spirituality as a site of inquiry into the knowledge production and experiences of Black girls in community with Black women. I argue that Black girlhood spirituality is a way of knowing how to mobilize ideas to transform circumstance. Ultimately, I learned that it is our connection to Black girlhood that makes possible our relationship and connection to the metaphysical/divine/invisible realm. My methods included implementing a qualitative thematic and arts based research methodology to analyze our actions, conversations, events, and music which illumined Black girls’ prophetic identity and allowed me to hear Black girls differently, consequently, extending the repertoire of Black girlhood sounds. Ethnographic fieldwork revealed that SOLHOT as a collective transforms our relationship to knowledge which then transforms our relationship to one another by enacting rituals that bring forth the manifestation of Black girlhood spirituality. While spirituality is often taken up as a solitary event, it is only through collectively organizing with Black girlhood at the center that Black girlhood spirituality is able to manifest. Revealed through ethnographic feedback, Black girlhood spirituality points to the ways collectivity activates power in an effort ii to challenge institutionalized control and dominance. This power then allows for Black girlhood subjectivity to be theorized as holy as shown through their everyday practices. iii Dedication The labor of this dissertation is in loving memory of… My Grandmother, Lurine T. Garner My Father, Eltorie Garner My Great Aunt, Evelyne “Big T” Grandy And My Chosen Grandfather, Percy Powell ...who I lost during this journey. Your ancestral support has been invaluable during this process. We did it. iv Acknowledgements Somebody prayed for me….. Had me on their mind… Took the time and prayed for me… I’m so glad they prayed… I’m so glad they prayed… I’m so glad they prayed for me... My graduate journey has definitely been a collage of various prayers rendered by me and others on behalf. To God, whom I have come to know better and better through this journey, thank You for knowing exactly what I needed before I did. I remember studying and believing Psalms 37: 25 right before I started this journey. You kept Your promise. I remember when I declared I was going to graduate school to pursue my PhD. My family has been extremely supportive in nurturing my dream and seeing me through it. Thank you to Boo and Lavette for raising me right and pushing me when I wanted to divert from this road. Auntie Pee Wee thank you for teaching me, the cooked meals, and memories of my grandmother. I know how to be a friend because I watched you both. Dennis, Darian, Kiera, Asia, Devonte, Daisy, Chynna, TeRae, Tavaris, Aaliyah, Kennedy, Kalel, Jaymon, DeAnthony, Jada, and Dante I am because you all are. I got yall back until the end of time. To my mother, Sandersil Irons, thank you for never giving up on me! You have taught me so much about redemption. Thank you for the financial stability and for being “here” despite immigration boundaries. I love you and I am so proud of you. To Dean Jeffries, Dr. Fortier, and McNair at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign. I am because you believe in students like me. Thank you for the exposure and your insistence on graduate education. Thank you to my committee members for trusting that I would find my way and encouraging me to do so. Thank you for your time and dedication to this project. Dr. Ruth Nicole Brown. This is certainly not enough space to tell you how much I love you and how grateful I am for your existence. It’s a good thing you already know! You dedication, love, care, and expectations are unmatched. You set the bar high and checked me when I missed the v mark, congratulated me when I made it, and helped me over the bar when I struggled. People have no idea how hard you are on your students, but in all of the best ways. You sharpen us with your questions and lead by example. You pushed me to reach MY potential and waited until I did. You work so very hard and I just want you to know that I see you and love you. Thank you for encouraging all of us to be better than you—you help us live in the bigger picture. I am scholar because you saw me. I am never letting you go. Thank you, Dr. Dyson, for introducing me to such a dynamic group of students through your AQR course series. We really pushed each other and helped one another get clear on our projects and scholarship. Dr. Dyson, thank you for your very bold belief in me and my scholarship. Your enthusiasm and drive to see me through to the end has certainly brightened the path of my journey. SOLHOT thank you for raising and growing me. Thank you for allowing me to get it wrong and thank you for your patience as I worked to get it right. I am you and you are me. Thank you for naming me artist. Bandbaes, I know love differently because of us. I love us because it is risky and you know I’m telling you the truth when I say I’ll take care of you!! I can’t wait until we’re legends and we’re all rich (s/o The Internet). Blair, my Scorpio sister. I am so glad we met and I’m so happy we still have all our contradictions and things in tow. You teach me so much about self-grace and claiming those who name you. Thank you for making this work and me stronger through your edits, questions, and text check-ins. Most of all, thank you for making this work stronger through your own scholarship. I admire your strength, wisdom, and love and loops. I love you forever! To my unofficial advisor, Jessica. Thank you for all of your great advice. This project would not be if it were not for you talking me through ideas, asking questions, and sharing your ideas and processes. You literally saved my life time and time again. Thank you for loving my true dramatic soul. You teach me so much about trusting myself and trusting others. Our friendship has sustained me during this process and truly I could not have asked for a better experience. I look forward to many more conversations, concerts, dinners, libations, and road trips. To my forevers, they say iron sharpens iron. We are blades because of one another. Vanessa, Daarina, Danica, Sesali, Jennifer, Keena, Damillia, Michellay, Tasia, and Tiffany for sure “my friends got my back and that is a fact” Thank you for the laughs, companionship, and for making sure I never went without what I needed. vi To the Gray Family your scholarship contributions, prayers, and familial love are the reasons I am here, healed, and whole. To the church family I will always know as home, True Vine of Holiness Missionary Baptist Church, thank you. I know you all petitioned heaven for me. Thank you to the YMCA for awarding me the Fred S. Bailey Graduate Scholarship. This scholarship for sure helped me to create a more just world through my dissertation studies. To Pasha I am so happy that we met and have built a long-lasting friendship. Thank you for always being ready to roll with the freedom train. You are a fighter and together we have stood steadfast in our beliefs. Thank you for challenging me and presenting me with various options. It’s not too late for our food truck endeavor. I thank God for the friendship of Amos and Alice Lee. You both showed up and showed out in ways that I could not have imagined. Thank you for the financial support and for opening your home to me and Quincy. Most of all, thank you for being friends who believed in equity and showed it through your actions and scholarship. I love you both. Thank you to Drs. Eric Pritchard and David Glisch Sanchez for providing me space to write and making sure I had the books that I needed. Your mental and emotional support has helped me hold on in moments of despair. I love you both. I am so thankful that Dom, Durell, and Cha paved the way for me and continue to be an invaluable resource. I am especially grateful to Dr. Tammy Owens who gave so much to me during this process of the dissertation.