The Jaybird Songs: a Memoir
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University of Tennessee, Knoxville TRACE: Tennessee Research and Creative Exchange Supervised Undergraduate Student Research Chancellor’s Honors Program Projects and Creative Work Fall 12-2003 The Jaybird Songs: A Memoir Hampton Andrew Holcomb University of Tennessee - Knoxville Follow this and additional works at: https://trace.tennessee.edu/utk_chanhonoproj Recommended Citation Holcomb, Hampton Andrew, "The Jaybird Songs: A Memoir" (2003). Chancellor’s Honors Program Projects. https://trace.tennessee.edu/utk_chanhonoproj/655 This is brought to you for free and open access by the Supervised Undergraduate Student Research and Creative Work at TRACE: Tennessee Research and Creative Exchange. It has been accepted for inclusion in Chancellor’s Honors Program Projects by an authorized administrator of TRACE: Tennessee Research and Creative Exchange. For more information, please contact [email protected]. Dec. 16 2003 11:54AM Pi ~F FAX NO. : 8659747173 " ...... ;1:.... ·~1······~ FROM : UNIl OF TN DE\T CLASSICS :~: .. , '. '., . .... .... :., \ " •• '. I .:.:' •• : • .. ' , . ..... : .... '. ". .'i :- .. .. '''.'' ,", '., " :.. '.'. ,:' , .:'. ''' .. .. '. .; ..... .. ,. FoRM,c; " COLLEGE· SCH;OLARS'PROjECT APPROVAL: J.'.," .... Scholar Mentor // ~ ,\ -rL r~ ~'V-J ~s I c:-.... ~ v\A.O'v- Project Title COMMITTEE MEMBERS (Minimum 3 Required) Name PLEASE ATTACH A COpy OF THE SENIOR PROJECT TO THIS SHEET AND RETURN BOTH TO THE PROGRAM DIRECTOR. THIS PAGE SHOULD 'BE DATED AND COMPLETED ON THE DATE THAT YOUR DEFENSE IS HELD. DATE COMPLETED _--'--!IrP~:;::;"",,+-D....:;;1).....;;8~- ......- --------- TheJaybird Songs Drew Holcomb Table of Contents Preface 1 Prologue, The velveteen Rabbit 7 1. A Darkened Sunshine 10 2. Jay, Spina Bifida, and the Journey of Faith 16 3. An Uncle's Prayer 19 4. Silent Tears 22 5. Upon Younger Days 30 6. Cocktail Hour 37 7. Cedarwood 45 8. First Evan, John Martinez, and the Love of God's People 53 9. "33" 65 10. Playing with the Fellas 71 11. Coach 80 12. Jackson Hole, President Clinton, and the Snake River 91 13. Granny and Mary Francis 101 14. The Bam 114 15. Chicago 122 16. A Usual Summer 131 17. Sweet Sorrow 140 18. Going Home 149 Epilogue 1 Preface This work began a long time ago, when my little brother, Jay Hatchett Holcomb, was born with an unexpected birth defect called Spina Bifida. By many of the world's standards and assumptions, Jay should have been a burden and a sad reminder of how painful life can be. Instead, he became a rich blessing to my family, our friends, and other people who came into contact with him or simply heard about his rich personality and his faithful and humorous perseverance through the trials and episodes that life brought him. This work, rite JOYDim Song~ tells the tale of how a courageous boy brought joy, encouragement, laughter, and love to his family, his friends, and to me, his older brother. Jay's life has always been a story that people who knew him have shared with each other, and also with other people who did not know him. I find myself telling stories to perfect strangers about this kid that I grew up with who molded and shaped the way I live and view the world. Since his early death, I have wanted to put his extraordinary life and personality into writing for two reasons. The first is a personal one. Because he was my younger brother and companion, I loved him dearly and openly. My first intent is to preserve in my own mind and heart the things about him that I, and of course my family, remember so well and look back on with bittersweet joy. The second reason I write about 2 Jay is to carryon the tradition of sharing him. From the beginning, Jay was not just our brother, or son; he belonged to all of our friends, the people sitting next to us at ball games or in the church pews, and others we have come into prolonged contact with. In that same vein, although Jay has sweetly departed, the stories live on, and so I write for all the people who knew him and served him and listened to him. Finally, I write for the people who did not know him, but might be encouraged or entertained by the telling of these stories surrounding Jay. In order to remind myself of all that was the quintessential 'Jay,' I submerged myself into a sea of material relating to his life, including anything from videos of his third grade school play, my mother's diaries, letters of condolence at his death, my own journals, to his own schoolwork saved by my mother. I also sent out letters to numerous people I thought would have significant things to add to that body of research material, such as his peers, caretakers, our family, and others, asking them for an personal interview. There is an obvious limitation to this process, in that I will have undoubtedly left out some people who spent time with Jay or who have interesting perspective and perceptions about his life. However, I do not assume that the finished product would ever be a complete product in terms of inclusivity. Another limitation I encountered was the inability to interview everyone who I had hoped to, either because they did not want to do so, or because of time limitations on their end. In some cases, people wrote their thoughts to me in letterform, which was very helpful. These interviews, alongside the other material, made it possible for me to acquire information I either never had or had long forgotten, and it enabled me to write about times in Jay's life where I was absent in body or mind. In other words, I wrote this work 3 from my own, limited, perspective, but based on the thoughts, memories, stories, and reflections of others who have just as much to offer regarding his life as I have. There were many decisions I had to make in terms of what to include and exclude, based not merely on how important I deemed the information, but on how I saw that it could contribute to the flow of the writing in general, and how well it matched what others were saying and thinking. Because of the enthusiasm and support of these people, I was able to paint pictures of things I had never seen, and to portray Jay in ways I might never have seen without their words and help. I write this work from the present, which is in some ways far removed from Jay's life, but in other ways still very close. Compared to many other biographical pieces in the memoir genre, eighteen years from Jay's birth and only four from his death, this piece is very close to the subject, with memories still fresh and vivid about Jay. However, it remains that time has passed, and with time details about the past can become tainted and there could obviously be descrepancies about certain occurrences recorded in this work. I do not claim that everything in this work happened just as it is written, although I have tried to remain as true to the source material as I know how. Memory is a powerful tool, and it could be argued that memory is just as important and telling as reality. Hopefully the stories about Jay's life and death reflect the reality of history, but also the way that people remember him, The actual research and writing of the majority of this work was done whilst a student at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville. As I mentioned before, the project has been an ideal in my mind for much longer, but being at the University gave me an opportunity to have resources and time to do it under the banner of a senior thesis. As a 4 part of the College Scholars major, I was granted the great privilege of building a curriculum for myself that best suited my academic and personal interests while an undergraduate. One of the few extra requirements for obtaining the College Scholars degree is to pursue a thesis of significant work and value relating to other subjects in my academic history. I began work on the project in the summer of 2003, gathering research and commencing with interviews, based in Memphis. Upon my return to Knoxville in August 2003, the work of organization began and I initiated the writing in early September, 2003. The academic interests the project should reflect are History and Religion. This work is definitely a piece of local and human interest history, involving primary and secondary source material research, and my personal involvement with the subject which makes it an even more interesting historical endeavor. Because the community around Jay was mostly composed of people with a strong evangelical Christian worldview, there is no doubt that the work has value to anyone interested in communities of faith, and the way they deal with relationships on a personal and community level. The work does not delve deep into historical and religious theory, and does not propose to do so. Instead, the work is a creative piece meant to commemorate an individual, and also have autobiographical elements about myself in it, since the work is filled with my perceptions and my commentary on Jay and the effect he had on me. There are many characters in this work that cannot be fully developed, due to the simple fact that Jay knew and interacted with so many people. The short characterizations may seem overly positive, or perhaps sometimes unrealistic. Jay (and I) always saw the glass as half full, and so the characters are portrayed in a light that Jay probably would 5 have seen them.