Rabbi Reacts T'filot ...Services
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CDMAt:l.t.fklfil l :!W jt.Jtll:!IHCA lltl!IHIAUM . I- llfrol - ~ - - ~ - u eti""'n Congregation B'nai Jehoshua Beth Elohim 90i Milwaukee Avenue I Glenview, IL 60025 I (708) 729-7575 October 28, 1994 23 Cheshvan 5755 Vol. 30;No. 3 Rabbi Reacts Some of the nicest brides and grooms and families I T'filot .... Services know have had their wedding ceremonies in hotels. But, in Friday, November 4 8:00 pm my opinion, hotels are awful places for wedding ceremonies. Shabbat Worship I'm not talking about the parties .after the ceremony. I'm Friday, November 11 no party mayvin. But I do know wedding ceremonies and 8:00 pm Shabbat Worhip how they reflect and even shape how we feel about our 8:45 pm Scholar-in-Residence WALTER ZANGER marriages. speaks on "The Peace Process as Seen from Israel" So here's what's wrong with ceremonies in hotels and (Shabbat dinner preceding, 5:30 pm, reservations needed) banquet halls, in ascending order of importance. See inside for the rest of Walter Zanger's weekend schedule 1. There is always too much noise coming from the Saturday, November 12 10:45 am next room or the kitchen. This is as true of the big B'nai Mitzvah: hitters like the Four Seasons as it is of Holiday Inns. Danielle Weber, daughter of Richard and Kathie Weber 2. Hotels and halls always take over the ceremony. Shara Netterstrom, daughter of James and Mavis Because it's their turf, the customer (you!) and the Netterstrom rabbi have little chance to control the photographer, Friday November 18 the mikes or the atmosphere. Hotels don't under 7:30 pm Family Service, Jr. Choir stand the ceremony much less value it. They want to November Birthdays, Story Serrnonette get it over with and get on quickly to their main 8:00 pm Alternative Adult Worship downstairs event. In my experience even elegant hotels don't 9:15 pm Service and line-dancing to follow for have tables the right size to use under a chuppa. 20-something singles And they couldn't care less. Saturday, November 19 10:45 am 3. Getting married in a hotel or hall is getting mar B'nai Mitzvah: ried in the most transient of places. Yesterday the Stephanie Hill and Jonathon Hill Junior League used the space., tomorrow it's Kiwi children of David and Terri Hill Sales Motivational and you know the rest. If we want WEDNESDAY NIGHT, NOVEMBER 23rd 8:00 pm people to view marriage as a permanent arrange at BJBE ment from the start, we have to help by putting Glenview Conununity Interfaith Thanksgiving Service wedding ceremonies in places which stand for per Joint synagogue and church choirs will sing manent values and will be tomorrow what they were Friday, November 25 8:00 pm yesterday -- like sanctuaries and homes. Shabbat Worship I know that some people want their parties in hotels. Saturday, November 26 10:45 am That's their call. But then they say they must also have the B'nai Mitzvah: wedding ceremony at the hotel for the convenience of their Jeff Katz, son of Ralph and Susan Katz guests. Brandon Bashkin, son of William and Judy Bashkin I don't see the logic. YmLJnvite them,~ for them, and Friday, December 1 8:00 pm they can't at least drive from the synagogue to the party to SHABBAI CHANUKAH SERVICE honor ~ family? Christians do it right. They have the Candlelighting Ceremony ceremony in church and either celebrate there or have Music Ensemble will play everyone drive to the party. (Tell the truth -- wouldn't you rather take a ride than stand forever in those hotel holding pens, waiting for the hotel to tear down the chuppa and put Adult Shabbat morning worship and I orah portion up the bandstand? I would.) study downstairs, Saturday morning, 10:00-11 :30 (continued on page 2) am, including Kiddush. This service is held whether or not there are B'nai Mitzvah in the sanctuary, and even when Religious Schools is not in session. [ BULLEfIN DEADLINE: November 1st I Rabbi Reacts (continued) President's Corner I am leading a two session discussion group in Three recent events served to re.mind me of the acces December on Philip Roth in general and specifically his latest sibility of the Torah and the joy and excitement that comes book Operation Shylock. The dates are Shabbat mornings when making it your own. December 3 and 10. We'll have a brief worship service A couple of weeks ago I had the honor of sitting on the (10:00-10:30 am) then discuss Roth till noon. You are bima as a group of adults celebrated their B'nai Mitzvah. welcome if a) you like Roth (no Rothophobes please); b) you The glow on the faces of their families could have easily re have read at/east 3 of his 19 books; c) you have or will read placed the lights in our sanctuary that special evening. Here Operation Shylock carefully and bring it with you; d) you will was a group of people who committed to their Judaism, make a Tzedakah contribution of your choosing in honor of sought even more meaning from their history and from the the experience. Call in to tell us you're coming and I'll send worship experience. · Thanks to the wise and gentle guid you Roth's new epilogue to Portnoy which we'll also discuss. ance of their teacher, Phyllis Steiner, they were able to en * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ter the world of Jewish learning as adults, gain knowledge, Calling creative graphic artists, craftpersons, amateur and develop the skills required for reading Hebrew. Each video producers. BJBE needs: seemed filled with awe as leaning over the unrolled Torah a) A new Omer counter, to mark the 49 days of the scroll, another link with those who have gone before was Omer on the bima next spring. We will use the one judged forged. best and display the others during the Omer-count. Small A few weeks later I shared another experience of stu devices are acceptable for display, but the bima counter dents and Torah as our new religious school students were must be large enough to show the number to all in the consecrated during Shabbat worship. This seemingly simple sanctuary. Talk to me or Rabbi Memis regarding technical ceremony was, in truth, a powerful event. Following the requirements before beginning to work. children's recitation of the Shema with their classmates, b) A device or game or video which will help people each was given a private blessing by his or her parents, and . understand how the Jewish calendar balances the lunar a small Torah scroll was placed lovingly into little hands. solar year. People with math minds understand explana Sensing the connection they were making for their child, tions, but most of the rest of us need visuals. See me or more than one parents' eyes filled with tears at that sweet Rabbi Memis for just what it is you will be teaching. All moment in the history of their family. useable entries will win prizes. Three nights later my seven-year old granddaughter, * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Danielle, celebrated Simchat Torah with me at BJBE. She The Glenview Interfaith Thanksgiving Service will be struggled as her second grade reading skills tried to keep held at BJBE on Wednesday evening, November 23rd. We pace with her drive to express· her Jewish literacy, and no need a good turn-out from the home team. matter how I assured her that God would hear every other Sincerely word if that was the best she could do, Dani maintained her Mark S. Shapiro intense concentration as she decoded the English. Reading isn't easy for her, but Dani's positive attitude takes her above and beyond test scores in the public school and her Birthday Blessings love of Judaism makes her a sponge in religious school. As On Friday, November 18 at 7:30 pm youngsters we paraded with the Torah that night, my step was made with birthdays in November will be called to the pulpit for lighter by the look on the face of this child of my child who a blessing and a gift. If your youngster's name is not on the so strongly feels the tie to her people and to her Torah. following list, please notify the Temple office. Torah scholars and sages provide us with interpreta Sara Belkin, Kevin Chankin, Shayna Chapman, Leah tions, rabbis and teachers give us direction, but the Jews Druzinky. Ryan Freedman., Rachel Gaffen, Sarah Goep simply embrace the Torah, making it our own, individually pinger, Ethan Jacobson, Adam Markoff, Laura Miller, Ruth and collectively, a part of a process, a continuation and a Perrin, Sarah Phillips,. Joshua Rosenbluh, Gary Ross, Brett connection. Rustin, Jeffrey Sacks, Joseph Sinker, Bradley Swidler, How exciting! Madeline Tropp and Lisa Wolin. B'shalom., Sandee Holleb Grief Support Group New Members Our BJBE support group meets on the first and third A warm welcome to the following who have recently Tuesdays of each month at 7:30 pm in the library. It is an joined our congregational family: ongoing group open to everyone who has suffered a loss. Gigi & David Addis Diane & Naum Averbukh Please join us and experience the benefit of support group Minda & Barry Goldufsky Geri & Martin Karlin participation. For information call Phyllis Glazer (498- Felyce Lewis Laura & Steve Locke 1161). Dana Lubelchek: Laurie Mirmahn.oudi Etee Perlut Dana Saperstein Ronna Wisbrod -2- In Our Family Educator's Column OUR1HANKS: Shalom.