The CordThe tie that binds since 1926 Weekly

HEADING DOWN THE HOMESTRETCH 101 The school year's winding down and we're guessing you probably haven't made the most of it. Thusly, Cord Features gives you a goal-oriented guide to the top 101 things

you should do before you leave Waterloo this year, or for good ... FEATURE, 12-13

Volume 46 Issue 24 WEDNESDAY MARCH 1,2006 www.cordweekly.com Laurier sweeps to OUA gold medal WLU rink curls to a comfortable 7-4 win over Queen's

MIKE BROWN four ends to the Golden Gaels in Sports Editor the final game of the round robin, a bye to the final hanging in the While the majority of students balance. were jet setting to tropical locales, The entire team, rounded out by drinking themselves into a stupor third-year lead David Jenkins, or - heaven forbid - reading, a rookie second Paul Arkilander and quartet of determined Laurier third-year vice Jeff Bennett, men with brooms were all busi- retained their composure and ness at the OUA Curling simply chipped away to secure a Championships in St. Catharine's 6-3 win. over the weekend. Combined with their stellar

Led by third-year skip Bill start to the final - also against Francis, the men's rink showcased Queen's after they downed the their skill en route to a fairly stress- host Brock Badgers in the semi- free 7-4 win over Queen's in final - Francis and co. shut their Sunday's gold medal game, Kingston counterparts off the enough to secure Laurier's third scoreboard for ten straight ends. provincial banner of the year. "There was no doubt in their "We had control the entire minds mentally, and it showed right game," explained Francis. "At no from the get-go," explained team point in that game were we really coach Ken McCormack. "We took threatened." complete control of the game early The finale was a fitting end to a and thatreally was the end of [it]." season dominated by the rinks The provincial title was a from Laurier and Queen's. Both marked turnaround from last teams entered the weekend with year's less-than-stellar 2-5 season. identical 6-1 records, the Hawks' Coach McCormack attributed the only loss coming to Queen's in the abrupt about-face to his team's East Sectional about a month superior dedication in 2005-06, prior. beginning in the first weeks of But this weekend was a different September at the nearby K-W story. The Hawks refused to panic when they were down 3-0 after - See CURLING, page 11

'LEGO Jim' educates Laurier students Matt Symes

GET THOSE ICE SHAVINGS OFF YA SHOULDER - Laurier forward James Edgar taunts the Waterloo bench moments after scoring the goal that eliminated UW from the OUA. WLU upsets UW en route to final four Jersey waving incident fires up Laurier as they eliminate cross-town rivals

DAN POLISCHUK ing from their University Avenue games at home, 5-2 and 6-4. News Editor opponents. Also getting the juices flowing "They don't seem to respect us was a little showboating incident As Laurier forward James Edgar for some reason," said Laurier by Waterloo forward David jumped into the arms of his head coach Steve Martell after Spooner after scoring the final teammates after scoring the their win in game two to tie up goal of the game one disaster. series-winning goal against the the best-of-three series. "We're Upon beating fourth-year goalie nationally-ranked Waterloo not really happy with that." Justin Day on a clear breakaway, Warriors last Sunday, it was obvi- "We'd like to think that we're a Spooner skated by the Hawk ous that the WLU men's hockey hard working group and that bench waving his Warriors jersey team had achieved more than we've earned what we've got," he for all of the Hawks to see. the apparent victory on the added. "That really ruffled some scoreboard. It was with that dedication that feathers," acknowledged team As the squad moves on to face the Hawks were able to come captain Richard Colwill, who was Lakehead in the OUAWest final, back from a humiliating collapse one of the many players on the there is no doubt that the ability in the series opener last team to step up his game, notch- Sydney Helland of the Golden Hawks will be Wednesday, in which they gave ing three points in the finale. BLOCK PARTY - Professor Trent Tucker touts the educational properties of respected a little more - some- up four third period goals in a 6- LEGO, which he uses in class to explain concepts. FULL STORY, PAGE 3 thing that the team felt was lack- 2 loss, to win the following two See HOCKEY page 8 |The Cord Weekly 2 > WEDNESDAY MARCH 1 2006 News

The Cord Weekly

~ The tie that hinds since 1926 - phone: (519) 884-1970 ext. 3564 revenue 1519) ad fax: 883-0873 AC seeks new email: coßMwlusp.com

The Cord Weekly Hanging banners bring in "stream of revenue" for department affected by university-wide funding reductions 75 UniversityAvenue West Waterloo, Ontario N2L3CS CATHERINE MANN Cord News WEDNESDAY, MARCH 1, 2006 VOLUME 46 ISSUE 24 On Tuesday, February 14, two new

Nexl Issue : March 8 banners could be seen on the gymnasium walls in the WLU QUOTE OS- IS if: WEEK "I haven't had onepicking one allyear." Athletic Complex. - Features editor BlairForsyth-Stark onherlast production both night, complainingabout her lack of quotes of the week WLU Athletics approved Rogers Wireless and Groggy WORD OF THE WF.IiK Clothing to utilize available wall Modal (nio-CIAL), noun: the combinationof a serious revenue board meeting with the fun and frivolity of a social event. . space in exchange for that Hip-hop superstar Kanye West throwsone mean mocial, incurred on a monthly boys and girls. would be basis. CONTRIBUTORS In recent years, several

Mark D. Hopkins Richard Togman JeanneTromba Canadian universities have seen a Lauren Millet Emma McFarlane Jennifer Cuilmore Malt Symes ' JenO'Neill reduction in funding in several Keren Gottfried Dm Jeffries departments. WLUSP STAFF Laurier Athletics was just one of Production Consultant Ron Johnson WLU's departments that have Production Assistant Ananthan"Sinnadurai been affected. Corporate sponsor- Janet Linscman Copy Editing Manager...... Aria Latto-HaM ship, according to director of ath- Copy Editors April Hildebrand letics and recreation Peter Baxter, Mike Zabic HeatherOlaveson "was an opportunity to create a Caitlin Henderson stream of revenue for facility Photo Managers Jordan jocius Sydney Holland advertising." Online Production Manager. lawn Shim there are several Human Resources Sanjay Ojjo On campus IT Manager. Regan Walsh forms ofproduct placement, most Distribution Manager. Leo Yu notably the exclusive sale of Coca- Cola at on-campus beverage out- WLUSP ADMINISTRATION lets. In return for selling the Coca- President \nlhony Piscitelli Cola brand exclusively, the univer- VP: finance Frascr McCracken VP: Advertising Angela Fosler sity receives revenue from the Sydney Helland VP: Brantford James Seott

that, in end, bene- - Chair of the Board Penny shearer company the is BEWARE OF BANNERS The Athletic department is banking on ads, like this Rogers banner, to bring in some cash. Vice Chair. Sanjay Pouinger ficial for the entire academic com- Board of Directors Evelyn chm to Baxter. GeorgeEast munity, according Arthur Wong When asked why he believes the ADVERTISING use of corporate sponsorship is an ever-growing trend in Canadian AH advertising inquiries should be directed So Lakehead says bye-bye to Wi-Fi VP: Advertising AngelaFoster at 884-0710, ext. universities, Baxter says that 3560 or [email protected] "Corporate sponsorship and advertising opportunities are ways JENNIFER CUDMORE COLOPHON to keep services and programs at Argus Lakehead University The Corel Weekly is the official studentnewspaper the high level that students expect. of theWilfrid Laurier University community. "This is a reason why the trend THUNDER BAY. ON. (CUP) - As of seeking entrepreneurial oppor- current electronic trends moves Started in 1926 as the College Cord, The Cord Weekly is an editorially independent newspaper published by Wilfrid tunities to generate a greater rev- further away from "wired" devices Laurier University Student Publications, Waterloo, a corpo- enue in to "wireless" devices, Lakehead ration without share capital. WLUSP is governed by its board Canadian university ath- of directors. letic departments is more preva- University in Thunder Bay is beat- lent today." ing against the current. The school wlujgy has enjoyed a recent rash of pub- aubha Dons licity, thanks to university presi-

Opinions expressed within The Cord are those of the author dent Dr. Fred Gilbert's decision to and do not necessarily reflect those of the Editorial Board. Cord, ban wireless internet access on The WLUSP WLU or MasterWeb Printing. Aid team on All content appearing in The Cord bears the copyright most of the campus. expressly of their creator(s) and may not be used without When asked about the possibili- written consent. ty of a wireless network on cam- The Cordis createdusing Macintosh computers running OS the mend X.2 using Adobe Creative Suite 2 (InDesign, Photoshop, pus, Gilbert's answer is firm. Contributed Photo Acrobat, Distiller and Illustrator) and Quark Xpress 6.1. Nikon D7O and Canon Rebel XT 8.0 megapixel digital cam- "There will not be wireless net- - offline eras are used for principalphotography. Adobe Acrobat and WHERE'S MY WI-FI? Lakehead laptops are now on campus. Distiller are used to create PDF files which are burned CATHERINE MANN works while [he is] president of the directly onplates tobe mounted on the printingpress. Cord News university, except in circum- TheCord is printedby Master Web Printing and is published stances where there is no other health before studies were done. access is available - are popping every Wednesday during the school year except for special editions which are published as required. Nearly six months after the initial alternative," he said. "Until such Fie believes the technology is too up all over. University and college TheCord's circulation for a normal Wednesday issue is 7,000 proposal for the Economic Aid time that there is adequate proof new to really have a good under- campuses around the country are copies and enjoysa readership of over 10,000. Team (EAT) was rejected, WLUSU that there is not a health risk standing about what long-term moving towards wireless internet Cord subscription rates are $20.00 per term for addresses within Canada. and its VP: university affairs, Jen involved with wireless networks, affects could be. service allowing students to access The Cord Weekly is a proud member of the Canadian Mitchell, have decided to give the there will be no wireless net- Lakehead University Student the internet just about anywhere UniversityPress (CUP), since 2004. committee life again. works." Union president Adam Krupper on campus. The Campus Network is The Cord's national yl|jl Back in October, WLUSU direc- Gilbert's concerns regard- that "students are irritated" Krupper is quoted in the advertising agency. main says tor David Alexander proposed a ing health deal with the electro- by Gilbert's decision. "They want Reuters article expressing senti- plan to implement a committee magnetic fields (EMF) that are wireless capabilities...they want ments that echo what he previous- Preamble to The Cord Constitution whose initial objective was to aid emitted from the Hotspots. to be able to do work where they ly told The Argus. "Considering students during times of peak Gilbert's background is in biology feel most effective." When asked this is a university known for its The Cord will keep faith with its readers by presenting news financial concerns use of technology, it's kind of and expressions of opinions comprehensively, accurately stress. and he has regarding the about health concerns of wireless great and fairly. It is the product of a previous impact of EMF's on people and on networks Krupper commented, "If bad that we can't get Wi-Fi." The Cordbelieves in a balanced and impartial presentation campaign successful at other young people in particular as they it causes cancer, it'd be something of all relevant facts in a news report, and ofall substantial opinions in a matter ofcontroversy. Canadian universities called the are still developing and are most to worry about. But then again, The staff of The Cordshall uphold allcommonly held ethical People's Potato, where students in vulnerable to the EMF's. Lakehead still uses pesticides." conventionsof journalism.When an error of omission or of commissionhas occurred, that error shall be acknowledged financial need are given free meals While there is still no concrete The appeal ofwireless access to CORRECTION promptly. during financially stressful times evidence and studies are still the internet is obvious - the free- The February 15 issue of The When statements are made that are critical ofan individual, of the academic year. underway, Gilbert is not willing to dom to roam and still be Cord mispelled the name of new or an organization, we shall give those affected the opportu- connect- nity to reply at the earliest timepossible. take the risk. Fie likens knowledge ed is an advantage to those who WLUSU VP: finance, Mossab Ethical journalism requires impartiality, and consequently regarding affects of EMF's to the take their work with them. "Flot Basir. The Cord regrets the error. conflicts of interest and the appearance of conflicts of inter- > Editorial reaction to this story on PAGE 4 est will be avoided by all staff. attitude about cigarettes' affect on spots" - areas where wireless

The only limits of any newspaper are those of the world around it, and so The Cord will attempt to cover its world with a special focus on Wilfrid Laurier University, and the community ofKitchener-Waterloo, and with a special ear to the concerns of the students of Wilfrid Laurier University. Ultimately. The Cord will be bound by neither philosophy, 5 Day Action News nor geography in its mandate.

The Cord has an obligation to foster freedom of the press Weather Forecast and freedom ofspeech. This obligation is best fulfilled when debate and dissent are encouraged, both in the internal workings of the paper, and through TheCord's contact with the student body.

The Cord will always attempt to dowhat is right, with fear of neither repercussions, nor retaliation. The purpose of the student press is toact as an agent of social awareness, and so shall conduct the affairs of our newspaper. Npufc MARCH 1, 2006 Tut. Cord Wrrm| i m m M %sB WEDNESDAY 3

VOCAL CORP New Cord EIC in the fold What are you, or would WLUSP hires special projects editor, former news editor as head of student newspaper for 2006-200/ you hypotheticaliy give DAN POLISCHUK up for Lent 7 News Editor

While anotheracademic year is set to wind down, things are just beginning to take off for April

Cunningham - the incoming edi- tor-in-chief of The Cord Weekly. A volunteer with WLUSP's flag- ship publication for three years now, Cunningham admitted to being "extremely happy" that she was chosen. "Its usually chocolate, but this "I always say it doesn't feel like work and that's how you know it's year I think I'll give up beer." really something worthwhile," she said, adding, think it's gonna be - Amelia Strzepek "I First Year Languages and a great year." Literature Incoming WLUSP president, Fraser McCraken, spoke of his confidence that "April will do a great job as Cord editor-in-chief." "She's definitely demonstrated herself as a very confident and exceptional journalist," he added. From a design standpoint, Cunningham does not envision many changes for the paper that Sydney Helland she believes "has looked so profes- READ ALL ABOUT IT! - April Cunningham looks over a copy of The Cord, envisioning her first day as EIC. sional" this past year. Instead, she "Hours and hours of video games." plans to focus on content and hav- she commented. out for the publication. tion manager, like past editors-in- ing "excellent stories, excellent Also on the agenda is an "1 dug my heels in early [with chief. writers," and raising the level of increased effort to integrate new The Cord], which helped me gain "You could say that, 'Well the

- Jesse Nunn journalism in every section. She writers into the paper. leadership skills that are necessary design is not going to be as tight Third Year Philosophy/ Political thinks this will build on the credi- "I think in the past, we haven't [for the editor's position)," she this year,' but you can look at how believes The Cord really focused on the incoming said. the content is going to be really Science bility that she has gained from its sophisticated first-year students, and I do think Describing herself as "really awesome because all my focus is image. it's a good opportunity to bring in dedicated, enthusiastic and a pos- going to be on that, while letting "I want [...] really researched 'fresh blood'," said Cunningham. itive thinker who sees things the print production manager do and interview-based stories in all Flaving been a news editor for through to completion," their job," she explained. the sections, so I think it's going to one and a half years, Cunningham Cunningham admits she may be "I think working together is really make us stand apart [from is confident in her ability to at a disadvantage by not having what will get us through." other university publications]," accomplish the goals she has set previous experience as a produc-

"Chocolate." Profs bring LEGO to the classroom

-Joanna Polanowski Seminar sheds light on the use of building blocks in teaching complex concepts to university-level students Third Year Communication Studies ADRIAN MA twenty-nine inches is actually a these concepts and theories in a which people have used LEGO. News Editor pretty sorry excuse for a LEGO more concrete manner, it's better." From constructing life-sized tower. She took two bricks and Trent Tucker stumbled onto the bridges to corporate team build- Who says that LEGO is just for showed us a much more effective same discovery. He uses LEGO in ing, people continually find new kids? Definitely not Samantha way of using them. My face burn- his courses to help illustrate things uses for the classic children's toy. Montes and Trent Tucker; two ing with shame, I conceded defeat. like linear programming problems "I've even seen people have lit- Laurier professors who have been The real value of this exercise in and data creation. Tucker has also tle mini-figures reenact scenes

- using the penultimate building toy minature architecture isn't in produced animated Lego videos from things that definitely ... in their classrooms. building tall towers, it's in the not unlike Monty Python and The aren't appropriate for a child-

Yesterday afternoon in the Paul practical application of teaching Quest for the Holy Grail - to pro- friendly toy company" laughed Martin Centre, Montes and Tucker organizational behaviour. 1 was vide clear examples. George. delievered a seminar to demon- told that the tower was an example "I heard about this LEGO exer- She is impressed that the small "Nothing." strate their unique approach. of path-goal theory, a concept that cise and I said 'I'm going to try it plastic blocks are now being used Despite not having touched a Montes teaches in her business for myself.' Stuff like this, with the at an academic level. LEGO block since the late 1980s, I courses. animation, I did with my kids at "I think it would have made [my - Alex Boehm found myself huddling beside Tim home. It's fun to do classes] very intersting," said Third Year Honours History Bishop, a graphic design professor with the kids, I George. "I'm a visual thinker and from Conestoga College, and PhD "I've even seen people have thought 1 could tie it seeing things put into practice psychology student Julie Mueller. little mini-figures into the classes." would be interesting and I think it Together we tried to build the reenact scenes Tucker feels would have helped me." tallest LEGO tower possible in that using LEGO Samantha Monte is convinced things definitely [...] three minutes. Our toy structure from that works because it's that adding a little bit of playtime grew brick by brick, inch by inch, aren't appropriate for a child fun. in the classroom is essential in to teetering dangerously as we "It's play," said keep students interested in the attempted to construct our plastic friendly toy company." Tucker. "[Whether] material. So far, it's been working. stairway to heaven. We worked it's kids or adults, I She says that students leave class feverishly, fully aware of our rapid- think it's fairly analo- with a better understanding of the ly diminishing time. All too soon, Kerry George, marketing manager for LEGO gous." concepts, and have even taken to professor Tucker announced that Canada Using LEGO to challenging each other to build time had run out. help students under- higher and build faster. "Maybe chocolate." "Let's see how we did," said She finds that using LEGO in her stand business concepts is some- "I'm excited when my students Montes. She pulled out a measur- classes is something that helps thing that not even Kerry George, are excited about learning and ing tape and scanned the tower, as students understand difficult con- marketing manager at Lego hearing that they're having these ■ Ashley Quinn Bishop, Mueller and 1 held our cepts in more tangible ways. Canada, has ever heard of. little competitions behind the

First Year Business breath in anticipation. "Twenty- "These programs are really "Actually, I'd be interested in scences ... it's great." nine inches," said Montes. A smile intensive," said Montes. "Anything attending the class," said George, Maybe it really does pay to lis- cracked on my face as 1 thought- instructors can do to sort of liven who is also a Laurier business grad. ten to the child within. Compiled by Blair Forsyth-Stark that must be pretty good. But that up, gain interest, engage the In her years at LEGO, she has

Photos by Sydney Helland Montes broke the news to us - students, get them thinking about seen a variety of creative ways in * |The Cord Weekly 4 WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 Editorial

The CordWeekly

~ The tie that binds since / 926 - Editorial Board

Editor-in-Chief International Editor Special Projects Editor Brandon Currie Tony Ferguson April Cunningham [email protected] t ferguson@cord weekly,co m [email protected] (519) 884-0710 ext. 3563 Arts & Entertainment Editor Cord Historian News Editors AlexHayter Kris Cote Adrian Ma [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] Sports Editor Print Production Manager Dan Polischuk Mike Brown Brvn Boyce dpo ischuk@cordweekly, I co m [email protected] [email protected] Opinion Editor Features Editor Photography Managers Carly Beath Blair Forsyth-Stark Jordan Jocius cbeath@co weekly.co rd m bfs tark@cordweekl v.co m j [email protected] Graphics Editor Helland Student Life Editor Sydney Emilie Joslin [email protected] Michelle Pinchev [email protected] [email protected] 884-0710 ext. 2852 Laurier students need (to) EAT

about time Laurier learned that the term 'starving student' isn't Emilie Joslin justa figure of speech. With tuition rates at their highest point in his- tory and Ontario premier Dalton McGuinty's tuition freeze thawing It'sout, it's no wonder that so many students are struggling to make do. Thankfully, WLUSU seems to be committed to resurrecting the Economic Aid Team (EATJ, to help students in financial distress. By providing students with free meals during financially trying times and by supplying information about where to find the cheapest groceries, the team hopes to help alleviate some of the monetary burdens facing students. This initiative will be welcomed by student masses and is long overdue. Other universities, including Concordia and Lakehead, have had similar Week? initiatives for years. 'Reading' With a multi-million dollar students' union that has no trouble organ- izing large scale entertainment events that often don't break even, it's sur- prising that a committee that would undoubtedly "provide for the needs of students" would not be pursued. It's unlikely that many students would say going to concert fulfills a greater need than eating and thankfully, the Union has realigned its priorities. Try again While the formation of the committee is a great step forward, the suc- cess of this service will ultimately depend on its execution. The service not only needs to be readily accessible and easy to use, but advertised so that students know it exists, how it works and how it could help them in a pinch. some work gets done on this day daily with my friends, who belit- By ensuring that students are able to benefit from this great service but most likely it doesn't, tle me until I agree to go out just with minimal confusion and restrictions, the initiative will be a success- because there is the need for to save my manhood. ful in decreasing the financial woes of the students it aims to provide for. some recovery from the previous This night out of course means The Students' Union should be commended for this progressive move TONYFERGUSON night. another recovery day and work but remain cognizant of its possible setbacks before patting themselves InternationalEditor This is where another name gets pushed back yet again. The too hard on their collective back. for the week might be good: how cycle repeats itself throughout For the sake of accuracy, whoev- about 'Horizontal Week'? the week until the final weekend, er gave Reading Week its name Whether due to recovering when panic sets in and we buck- should change it to something from a rough night, lying on a le down to force-feed ourselves more representative of what beach (for those who went some- those few precious chapters. Compared to Coke deal, actually takes place. where warm), or doing some car- We then feel guilty for not It's designed to be a Utopia for nal catch-up with a doing what we set out to do, but I easing our workload; a time for girlfriend/boyfriend who goes to think we're being too ambitious. us to get our bearings after sec- another school far away, this is a Of course we think we're being AC ads are harmless ond semester becomes just a lit- popular position to spend the unproductive because we set out tle too hectic. Combined with break in. ridiculous goals during what gloomy winter weather, it's For those who spend the day really should be a grace period. Laurier students and faculty who Cola deal forces students to buy enough to make anyone hope for recovering, getting up and start- We've worked hard enough lead- frequent the Athletics Complex Coca Cola-brand drinks on cam- a break. ing school work can be daunting, ing up to reading week and we can now add two more advertise- pus, essentially lending the As the week approaches, especially at the early hours of deserve a little break. ments to the gazillion or so that school's support to a company intentions to catch up become the day, around four or five The other problem is that are already foisted upon them with a horrendous human rights more elaborate until the week is o'clock in the afternoon. we're taking the title too serious- each day Banners promoting track record. supposedly filled with things to The next day also starts a little ly. We forget that the "reading" in Rogers Wireless and Groggy Aside from being simply tolera- do. A chapter ofreading one day, later than usual because of the Reading Week doesn't specify a Clothing are now hanging in the ble, the banners provide much- a couple pages of an essay anoth- altered sleep schedule from quantity. Whether you've read AC. needed funds to the school. er: by the time the week is recovery day. By the time you're one page, one chapter or one But while it may be true that we The football team's current through, the last month of class- out of bed and ready to go, it's book during the week, you've see an obscene amount of adver- struggle to pay for their Vanier Cup es will practically be a breeze. past noon. You see your textbook still been reading. If reading took tising in our daily lives, the AC rings shows that the both the Oh, how naive we are. and remember that you are five place during the week, stop wor- banners are more beneficial than Athletics department and the Ifthe name was to be changed, chapters behind. The idea of rying about how unproductive it detrimental, in our view. school in general are in need of 'Unproductive Week' would be reading for school isn't that may have been and pat yourself They're far more inocuous than more money. fitting since most of the work appealing yet, so you switch to on the back for doing what the many other advertisements - less So if we can use it, and the com- schedule we set out for ourselves some pleasure reading, look at week was meant for. annoying than internet pop-ups panies are offering, then why not? gets ignored. your textbook and say convinc- Essentially, Reading Week is and less moronic than most televi- The pervasiveness of advertising And so begins the week. No ingly, "See ya in the morning." just a week of free time for stu- sion commercials. And they're cer- isn't going away any time soon, so work on the first day, of course, The week continues in this dents to figure out how to deal tainly less harmful than the uni- we might as well take advantage of especially this year since the fashion with pathetic attempts at with the end-of-the-year crunch. versity's partnership with Coca it and use the money where it's snow day made everyone's week doing work, easily cut short by Whether you blaze through Cola. While the AC banners simply needed. a little longer. That in itself was the most trivial of distractions. five chapters a day or relax on a tout brands to students, the Coca cause for celebration. This first Any work time lost during the beach, you will come back to day is the de-compression day, day has little chance of being school ready to tackle the final where students take time to made up in the evening, the time month of class. These unsigned editorials were agreed upon by at least two-thirds of the The unwind and gel used to a much when the calls from friends itch- Cords Editorial Board and do not necessarily refect the views ofThe Cord's less stressful schedule. ing to go to the bar start rolling volunteers, staff or WIAJSP. Then comes day two. Ideally, in. Saying no can be hard, espe- [email protected] fIHE CORD WEEKLY] Opinion WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 < 5

Canada - fit orfat? Diverse body types are good, until they begin to affect our health, well-being and quality of life, warns Kathryn Flynn

conditions associated with insulin isn't just because of an increase resistance such as Type 2 diabetes, inapple-shaped adults. certain types of cancers and gall- Parents with sedentary lifestyles bladder disease. A raised Body and unhealthy eating habits are KATHRYN FLYNN Mass Index (your weight in pro- passing their poor choices along Good Girl Revolution portion to your height) also to their children. According to a increases the risk of cancer of the University of Maryland study, chil- For the last two weeks Canadians breast, colon, prostrate, dren are also more likely to be have been chirping encourage- endometrium, kidney and the gall- overweight if they live in suburban ment to their television sets in bladder as well as osteoporosis. areas. support of Olympic athletes. But the politics offat are equally Another part of the body's poli- While we don't have much in frightening; just think of the tics is access to information and common with these extraordinari- amount of money spent market- finances. There is a correlation ly healthy beings, we were bonded ing fad diets to the desperate. between income and obesity rates. by a pasttime conducive to the Those looking for quick solutions With only ten percent of the sedentary lifestyle more are victimized by the insecurities average Canadian family budget Canadians are choosing to lead. created by an advertising industry being spent on food, many fami- We are expanding at a rapid rate equally hawking the slim and lies opt for convenience foods in what the World Health beautiful. rather than whole ones. Organization refers to as an obesi- The children of baby boomers Canadians seem to be confused Contributed Photo ty "epidemic." We Canadians are were supposedly taught to as to what is healthy. A general rule FRIES WITH THAT? - Canadians are eating too much fast food and endan- fatter than ever, now that 50 per- embrace diversity and that we of thumb is eating whole foods gering their health, says Kat Flynn. cent of our population is consid- should love all body types. After whenever possible, with limited ered to be overweight. all, different shapes and sizes intakes of unhealthy fats and sug- on dietary consumption don't weight. We're losing the battle, but As so much of the world is starv- make this world more interesting, ars. Higher income adults are also extend into the realm of con- we're not as far gone as our sour- ing from nutritional deprivation, unless those sizes are shortening not exempt from the statistics. sumerism, but many artists and thern neighbours. we are suffering from excess. your lifespan and inhibiting a They're overweight too, but they intellectuals have taken on the America earned more According to the Toronto Star, rewarding existence. eat better food. battle for them. From Fast Food medals at the Olympics and yet is

"experts estimate that diet-related Health consciousness should be The government can only do so Nation to Supersize Me, there is the fattest country in the world - chronic diseases cost the country about promoting healthier much, as some would say that no end to pop culture's critique of it's not always excellent to be $4 to $6 billion directly and indi- lifestyles that balance diets and efforts beyond the Canadian Food the fast food industry, but these number one. rectly." physical fitness. That's not to say Guide are interfering in people's works seem to be criticizing Big Carrying excess weight negative- that slimness denotes being choices. But when the drain to the Business and shifting the onus off ly affects an individual's health in healthy or that heavier people health care system is so enor- consumers. an array ofways. The life-threaten- cannot be in excellent shape for mous, an advertising campaign As the trend continues it isn't ing consequences among these their body type, but when half of seems pretty reasonable. unthinkable that the vast majority letters@cordweekly. com include cardiovascular disease, all Canadians is overweight, this Canada's reccommendations of Canadians will soon be over- Minor leaguesfeed Olympic pool The Olympics may be far from their original form, but they have their benefits all the same, says Mark Ciesluk

hero is only a cup full of urine Call it a stretch if you must, but children play no matter what, It would also be a shame to away from being tomorrow's dis- I'd argue that even in their current encourages healthy, active underplay the boost to national graced Letterman-monologue tainted, much-derided state, the lifestyles that persist throughout character achieved by Olympic joke. Olympics have a valuable role to life, and even helps maintain com- MARK CIESLUK victories. Despite the disappoint- So if the Olympics continue this play. munal atmospheres. ments and scandals, Olympic Thus Spake theWiseman slide into a parody of their true Increased funding for minor It is also the cornerstone of heroes are still household names intentions, what is the point ol athletics is one of those things that Olympic funding strategies for one in many countries; epic stories of The ancient Olympics were con- pouring millions into funding for is very difficult to argue against. It inescapable reason: countries with come-from-behind victories and ceived as a joyous time ofreligious Olympic athletes and programs? provides relief for cash-strapped high rates of public funding for world-record performances are worship, celebration and peaceful What is the point in Vancouvei parents determined to see their minor-league sports tend to pro- tightly interwoven into national (though intense) athletic competi- laying out well over a billion duce more athletes capable psyches. tion between oft-warring city- dollars to hold this traveling of competing on the I, for one, certainly remember states. freakshow as the costs for world stage. Programs where I was when Canada finally 1,000 years after their dissolu- host cities soar? Have in place from the earli- won Men's Hockey gold in 2002 - tion by the Christians of Rome, the the lessons gleaned est of the minor and, incidentally, where I was Olympics saw a modern revival from Montreal's leagues encourage when we won jack squat this year. which hoped to return their spirit Olympic fiasco (which athleticism and fos- The ancient Greeks knew some- to the world. was only recently com- ier talent that can thing about sport: it ties commu- Unfortunately, 100 years after pletely paid off after only serve to benefit nities together, no matter their that revival, the Olympics seem almost 30 years) already both Olympic aspira- size, by providing a friendly perpetually mired in scandal and faded from our collective tions and general avenue of 'us against them' com- are muck raked from all sides, with consciousness? social well-being. petition. Perhaps this is the legacy mud slung at any party foolish we can ultimately salvage from enough to become involved. their tarnished reputation. Consider Sale and Pelletier's At the end of the day, however, weepy-whining-turned-Gold as none of that ever seems to matter. their competition is eliminated on When that band stirred into "O doping charges, or Ross Rebagliati Canada" over and over again these proving to the world that it really last two weeks the does tears on the help to be stoned off your ass faces atop the podium were real, when you throw yourself down a and no matter how asininely sen- mountain. timental it may have been, I In a setting conceived to show- couldn't case help but feel the surge of Terry Fox-like determination pride, every single time. and honour, Canada (and the Money well spent, I say. world) instead present Ben Johnson-style dishonesty and s ame. Today's glorified national [email protected] The Cord Weekly 6 > WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 Opinion I I Live theatre talks back and parties hard Forget the image of live theatre as dull and inaccessible, it's actually quite engaging, says the Laurier Fringe Festival's organizer

actor who denounces the king get- ting a shoe thrown at his head. Live theatre has lost its place in TANYADOROSLOVAC modern times as the main infor- Working mation and entertainment medi- Stiff um. People think of it as expen- sive, dull and time-consuming. This week, my opinion is that live Unlike movies that play all over theatre is great and that we should town every three hours, plays are all go see as much of it as possible, performed just once a night at a especially when it is being pro- single theatre. Though I under- duced by our own community. stand the argument that going to Now, to avoid this looking like a see a play is somewhat inconven- shameless plug for the WLU Fringe ient in our time, the age of instant Festival (MARCH 2, 3, and 4 AT bacon, the other half of the argu- THE MAUREEN FORRESTER ment is far more compelling. RECITAL HALL), I am going to A live performance can never be explain why watching live theatre duplicated. When you are a part of is a much better use of your time the audience, you affect the per- than television, movies, and yes, formance by laughing, snorting, even trampoline basketball. crying, gasping or otherwise shar- To do this, let's turn our minds' ing your energy with the actors. eye back to Elizabethan times and That can't happen during a the birth of modern Western the- movie, believe me. I've made lusty atre. noises at Johnny Depp on the big Back in those days, the theatres screen for ages and he's never were filled with the gentry-elite and replied with a snide ad lib. That poor rapscallions alike. Though the kind of crazy crap happens all the elite sat in luxury box seats with time in live theatre. I was at a show monacles while the rapscallions in the summer where the audi- Contributed Photo stood in the pit wearing rags and ence randomly started hissing at STAGE FRIGHT - We've been neglecting live theatre lately, but it offers interaction, unpredictability and proximity eating consumption-filled pota- the villain, and the narrator to the actors that TV and movies don't have. toes, the audience was made up of screamed at us "SHHH! YOU'RE a rare cross-section of society. ONLY MAKING HIM STRONGER!" FRINGE FESTIVAL, MARCH 2, 3, 4 Unlike movies and television, tions in our own community. Theatre brought the classes The fact that it's live and imperfect 2006. which broaden the gap between Plus, I hear the parties are off together in a truly interactive form is half the fun. Theatre can also be cheap to the performers and the audience the hook. of communication. The plays were And guess what? Theatre can be produce - which means that if you (in terms of both geography and often commentaries on current cheap. Even in a small-ish town don't agree with what you see on celebrity status), theatre brings us political and social situations, and like Waterloo, you have a selection stage, you can always create your together, creates a forum for dis- the playwright and actors received of fare to choose from. The own. cussion and is reflective of situa- [email protected] immediate feedback from the Kitchener-Waterloo Little Theatre Finally, theatre is most decided- audience on their ideas. does nine shows a year, with tick- ly not dull. It can range from the We try to recapture that sense of ets going for around ten bucks. We poetic to the bizarre, from heart- active feedback today in our enter- have Theatre & Company, a pro- wrenchingly sad to gut-hurting IMPACT YOUR COMMUNITY tainments with web discussion fessional ensemble on King St. in funny. Those are our ideas on forums and those really annoying Kitchener, the University of stage, art as entertainment, people Think you've got what it takes to be on the text messages on MuchMusic. But Waterloo Drama Department and getting a high off of being some- Affairs Council? it will never be as immediate as an of course, THE WILFRID LAURIER one else. Judicial The J.A.C. is currently hiring highly motivated, dynamic individuals to serve their community as part of the council during the 2006-2007 academic year 1 Chairperson 1 Vice-Chairperson 5 Councillors 3 Student Advisors Letter to the Editor The J .A.C. is the student judiciary body of Wilfrid Laurier University dealing with non-academic offenses within the Laurier community.

Left in the cold cashed my cheque (less than a then does nothing at all to com- Application packages & more informationis available in the Dean of

week before I was scheduled to pensate me will definitely never Students' office, 3rd floor - Fred Nichol's Campus Centre School is back under way after our leave), I received another phone see my business again. Before you much-needed break and I'm not call notifying me that they had book your vacation next year, con- Application deadline is 4:00 P.M. 0n... going to lie, I'm a little jealous overbooked and I was getting sider yourself warned. March 7th. 2006 when I see many of my classmates screwed over for a second time. I March 10th. 2006 & with nice tans. I definitely partied would have found a last-minute Mike Tsuchiya Chair Vice-Chair All other positions hard this past week and took deal through a more reliable com- advantage of my time off, but I'm pany, but unfortunately I still sit still a little bitter that I was stuck here two weeks later with not here and not down south on the enough money in my account to beach. The cause of my bitterness afford another trip, waiting for my would be a company whose busi- refund. I'm not sure what kind of ness practices I'm still unsure of. I Mickey Mouse operation is being had booked a trip to Cancun run here, but apparently over 100 through Breakaway Tours with a people were put in the same boat couple friends in early December. as me. All I can say is that I have Come mid-January, I received a learned my lesson here. Any com- phone call notifying me that the pany that screws me over twice, Travel CUTS has sent over 1 million resort they had booked me at was passengers to Europe over the years. shut down. Why they booked me Letter Policy: at a resort that wasn't even open is All letters to the editor must be signed and sub- beyond me, but 1 guess it's my mitted with the author's name, student identifi- This is YOUR year. fault in trusting them with cation number, and telephone number. Letters my must be received by 12pm Tuesday disk, on or ■ ■ money and booking another trip via e-mail at [email protected] with STUDENT/YOUTH AIRFARES ISIC CARDS through them. They assured me the subject heading of 'Cord letter.' Letters ■ RAIL & ■ must be typed or easily legible and may not BUS PASSES HOSTEL MEMBERSHIPS that there was still plenty of space exceed 350 words. The Cord reserves the right ■ TOUR OPTIONS ss STUDENT RATE INSURANCE on the trip heading to the to edit any letter for brevity and clarity. Spelling and grammar will be corrected. The Cord Dominican, so I mailed them reserves the right to reject any letter, in whole Travel CUTS is owned and operated by the Canadian rederalion ofStudents. TICO #1324998 another cheque, knowing that or in part. many of my friends were already The Cord reserves the right not to publish I booked on this vacation. It came material that is deemed to be libelous or in | contravention with the Cord's Code of Ethics or j nfPTff lHli^^HEifSss3?si3 as a surprise that the day after they journalistic standards. |the^RDWeekiy| WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 ￿ 7 TO is HIBIHG FOR Wl Applications are available in the LUSP C 0" b ottom HIRING IS NOW OPEN FOR: ?,' . floor off°M'Macdonald House residence at the campus. All Cord Editorial Board Staff (honourarium) or students Waterloo Brantford students can pick up All Blueprint Editors and Senior Staff application forms from the Campus Manager's office. All Sputnik Editors and Senior Staff Applications are due Wednesday All Keystone Editors and Senior Staff March 22, 2006 at 4:3opm.

- . | drop off applications at Office \#D Cinanra nf Arlminictratinn Waterloo WLUSP V" rindnCc CIIIU MUIIIIIII9LI ctLIUII Brantford - drop off applications at Campus Manager's Office

Application Deadline Extended until Wednesday, March 22 Interviews will be held March 24-26 for the following positions: Information Technology Manager por more information COntaCt r^~ Ber Anthony Piscitelli, President of WLUSP Corporate Secretary at [email protected] or by phone at 519-884-0710 x3565.

Tlir rnDR li/fFFf V X M M-JtL 112 112 JLj JLj.tikJiLi jl ...is hiring editors for 2006-07

News Editor (2) - Working with another editor, co-ordinates reporting of campus news ,4'M and events. Works with Special Projects Editor to develop long-term news stories and JM manages news writing team.

Opinion - Editor In charge of the Editorial and Opinion pages, the individual must hire - and manage columnists, co-ordinate editorial cartoons with the Graphics Editor and work closely with the Editor-in-Chief and Editorial Board in writing unsigned editorials

International Editor - Edits the International pages and co-ordinates writers to tackle localized versions of international issues and stories.

" " Features Editor - Responsible for three features per month on fun and interesting top- rf

Sports Editor - Assists writers in covering varsity and local sports, analyzing significant * pp catlons a,e k LUSP sports issues and profiling notable Laurier athletes. Must manage a '| pil, °?Ce o ofgroup of writers and . , n . Applications due March 22 in the WLUSP at , , , a^ 8^office 4:3opin work with ensure photo manager to that covered events are . photographed. please include two relevant samples • You must also submit a 2-page proposal critiquing this year's section and outlining Student Life Editor - Works with a group of writers to complete a weekly section of your vision for the 2006-07 year pieces that are relevant to the lives of Laurier students. * Candidates must be available over the weekend of March 24 10 26 for interviews • An interview schedule sign-up sheet will be posted in the WLUSP office on March 22 Special Projects Editor - Will produce a investigative, research and interview-based fea-

• • ￿ You for than one * apply only tnrom,nr,,ti i „ may more position, however you can hold one ture every three on poignant newsv issues. , ; , weeks ° J • Editors receive an honourarium of at least $400 at the end of a successful term • Experience with The Cord is not necessary but is definitely an asset

- Arts and Entertainment Editor Manages a large team of writers to produce a variety of . Editors' terms run from May Ist, 2006 till April of 2007 stories ranging from reviews to concert coverage and previews to artistic analysis on and ! around campus.

Graphics Editor - Leads a team of illustrators and graphics designers to add visual flare to each section. Must work closely with Editor-in-Chief, Print Production Manager and ( Tk TI"I "■ each section editor. \lfw X VhL JW I HF |The Cord Weekly 8 » WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 Sports And then there were four

Matt Symes

TOP SHELF - Third-year forward Matt Grennier opens the scoring for the Hawks on a feed from rookie Matt Maccarone, roofing a power-play marker on UW's sprawling goaltender Curtis Darling.

Fresh legs and home ice advantage spur Hawks to a come-from-behind series win in heated contest with neighbouring Waterloo Warriors

- From HOCKEY cover changed so quickly after their pleased to finally get some "It's my last year; it's all I've ever take them down here," summed solid performance in the series redemption over the team that wanted: just to go on and make a up Edgar. opener, when it seemed like the ousted them from last year's play- run." Coach Martell shared the same But Martell did not take the vic- Warriors may have been on their offs. As they turn their gaze towards a opinion on a return drive from tory over the nationally-ranked way to the next round, Bourque Lakehead London, after meeting with Warriors as an upset at all. admitted he "didn't know what Obviously they were back at Thunderwolves team Western head coach Clarke Singer "We felt we were evenly happened." that defeated the for a scouting report on their matched with Waterloo. We "I think it's playoff-style hockey. home; it's a new game. Laurier fourth-ranked upcoming opponents. thought they were a good team, Obviously they were back at home; Western Mustangs, " [Lakehead] is a good team, no but at the same time, we felt that it's a new game. Laurier came out came out hard and played hard for the opener question. They have a lot of depth. we could be this team if we were hard and played hard ... I think tonight, the Hawks Anytime you knock off a top team playing well and playing with a they more just had intensity [in ... I think they just had more refuse to get ahead of like Western, it's not just a lucky real sense of urgency," he the last two games]," Bourque themselves too much shot." explained. offered as explanation. intensity [in the last two even with a With home-ice advantage in UW bench boss, Brian Bourque, Once off the ice and in their Nationals appear- Laurier's grasp again this round, admitted that the Hawks' ability to dressing room, one could not help games]." ance a series victory the series will return for Game #2 capitalize their on opportunities but hear the jubilant refrain of Brian Bourque, UW head coach away. and a possible Game #3 at the Rec was ultimately the deciding factor. "Eddie, Eddie!" reverberating in "It's in the back Complex on Friday and Sunday "Both teams had their chances the bowels of the Waterloo of our minds, but you respectively. Game times are in all three games and in the third Recreational Complex. "You don't know how great it gotta take the task at hand, which 7:3opm. took As game they advantage of their the team recognized a solid feels in the dressing room with the is going to be Lakehead - going up opportunities and we didn't," said effort of not only the aforemen- boys right now," said Colwill, grin- there and trying to pull one out. Bourque. tioned Edgar, but the entire unit, ning from ear to ear. "It's unbeliev- Once we get back here, we're 12-2 When asked to explain what captain Colwill was more than able; you can't describe it." at home so we should be able to "WSemmnals

" " °- Goalie; '° • Justin Day 2 87 GAA ' 920 sv Goalie: chris whi|le T TTITI Tl \ y 1 gaa, 0.929 sv% /\jM l-H T°p Scorer: NickVer9eer- 10 G, 20 A Top Scorer: Joel Scherban 13 G, 14 A

IA - @ flpiy I4f AIA/lfC Game one Wednesday March 1 7:30 pro Fort William Gardens, Thunder Bay \Sfcs JIM/'mWV IVJ Game Two - Friday March 3 @ 7:30 pm Waterloo Rec Centre \ji Geam Three - Sunday March 5 @ 7:30 pm Waterloo Rec Centre (if necessary) Ithe Cord Weekly| Sports WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 9 Volleyball Hawks settle for bronze

After coming tantalizingly close to upsetting the perennial powerhouses from Toronto, Laurier managed to down Ottawa to secure a podium finish

MARK D. HOPKINS gold medalist Western Mustangs Sports Writer to earn a final four berth. In the bronze medal show- After a 13-6 regular season, down, Laurier quickly found Laurier's volleyball ladies were themselves down 2-0 by scores eyeing OUA supremacy as they of 25-8 and 27-25 and appeared entered the conference's final destined to leave Toronto with- four this past weekend at the out a medal to show. However, University of Toronto. the Hawks managed to plough Slated to battle the 17-2 host their way back in an ironically Varsity Blues in the semi-final, similar way to their previous Laurier entered the match as the defeat in the semi-final. clear underdogs. For two sets, it Taking the final three sets 25- was hard to tell. The Hawks 20, 25-11 and 15-13, the Hawks looked poised to knock off the captured an OIJA medal for the powerhouse from Toronto as second time in as many years. they jumped to a 2-0 advantage While Mclntyre was happy to with convincing scores of 25-14 obtain one, he made it clear that and 25-15. it was not the colour the team was hoping for. "We made some basic errors that "It's better than losing that allowed them to come back into bronze medal match," he

the game ... They pfay offered. "I would- didn't Matt Symes n't say I'm happy, BATTLE CRY - Led by Coach of the Year Rick WLU's women shoot for an three-peat this exceptionally well in the third [but] this was the Osborne, QUA weekend. next best thing." game. They were ready to lose." While clearly not glowing over the third-place WLU women's voleyball coach Dave Mclntyre finish, the calm Dynasty in infancy? yet intense coach was happy with Unfortunately for the purple the group's ability to regroup. MIKE BROWN With all-star selections Ashley foundations of a Canadian hockey and gold, their drive to the upset "We talked about pride and Sports Editor Stephenson, Laurissa Kenworthy, dynasty. was quickly halted as Toronto that was really what it came Lauren Meschino and Fiona Aiston thinks Laurier's secret is woke up and took the subse- down to," said Mclntyre. "I think After Sunday's late-night practice Aiston in the mix, one wouldn't be simple enough: "Replacing great quent three by scores sets of 25- it was a decision on their part to at Albert McCormick Arena, sec- hard-pressed to make a case for players with great players that are 22, 25-15, and 15-7. not roll over. It wasn't pretty, but ond-year defender Andrea Bevan Laurier as just that squad. Of coming through the program ... I Coach Dave Mclntyre was we were able to pull it off." of Wilfrid Laurier's second-ranked course, like everyone else at this think that's what it takes. You have quick to acknowledge his disap- Additionally, the experience of women's hockey team had an weekend's OUA Final Four in St. to have a solid group to start with pointment over the collapse. the past two years may prove to uncommon complaint: Reading Catharine's, they're one loss away and then bring in new talent every "We made some basic errors that be a valuable commodity as next Week was apparently too long. from a playoff exit. year." allowed come them to back into season commences. "We can say Indeed, Bevan and her team- "It's playoffs, so anything can As long as Osborne sticks the game," he admitted. "They 'we've been there, we've done mates are growing restless after happen," says Bevan, adding con- around, the talent shows no sign play exceptionally well in didn't this before.' There is a comfort having completed their regular fidently, "[Guelph is] a rough team of drying up. So how long can the third - game. They were ready level there. You can't buy experi- season with an OUA-best 20-3-1 they're physical - but if we play Laurier fans expect his to lose." calming ence. All you can ask is not to record on February 18, and this our game, they won't be able to influence behind the bench? Nonetheless, the loss relegat- make the same mistakes again," Saturday's semi-final showdown stay with us." "I would say two to four years," ed Laurier into the bronze medal he concluded. with the very physical 9-8-6-1 "I'm assuming that we're going estimates Osborne. "If the City of match against Ottawa, who were Windsor defeated Toronto in Guelph Gryphons can't come too to be playing in the 3:00 game," Waterloo and Laurier host the knocked off a by resurgent straight sets to capture a surprise soon. laughs Aiston, referring to nationals after Ottawa, I'd think Windsor Lancers squad - the gold medal. Entering the year as the defend- Sunday's OUA Championship. pretty hard about sticking same around upstart group that ing national champions, it's been Until proven otherwise, the until that's done." knocked off the defending OUA hard to retain their focus through Hawks have every reason to be "I do get offers every year," the the long season at times, particu- confident. They've clearly proven winner admits. "I just got a larly having clinched the top spot impressed former-Hawk and pretty decent one last year to go in Ontario with weeks to spare. recent Olympic gold medallist out East." The Hawks have shown exemplary with the women's national team, Luckily, he's not too easy to balance, boasting the highest- Cheryl Pounder. entice. octane offence and the stingiest "Laurier's got an amazing pro- "1 enjoy the setup we have here Had to defence to boot. and be gram under done.. the guidance of and the kids that keep knocking Second-year goaltender Morgan Rick Osborne, I think there's a lot on our door are great kids, as well Wielgosz has stepped into the for- of players that have the potential as great hockey players, so I think midable shadow of graduated [to represent Canada nationally]," we're going to have a real strong MVP Cindy Eadie admirably she noted in a phone interview recruiting class again next year boasting a league-best 1.14 GAA, from Turin, Italy, citing Kenworthy, and the year after." Meanwhile, coach Rick Osborne Aiston and Bevan as athletes that For the time being, he just earned OUA Coach of the Year have already competed for spots smiles and waits patiently for the honours. on the national Under-22 team. puck to drop Saturday night. "I'd "It's a nice award because it is With such an abundance of love to get the [OUA] three-peat chosen by my peers," acknowl- skill, tremendous coaching and and the [CIS] back-to-back at edged Osborne. "But really I'm superior scouting, the Hawks Laurier," gleams Osborne. "That's focused on being the coach of the seem poised to repeat as Canada's my focus right now." best team." creme de la creme and secure the The Cord Weekly 10￿ WEDNESDAY MARCH 1.2006 Snorts Hawks' Cinderella run stops short WHAT'Syour fit.

Hundreds of ar t you opportunitieslifers^.-e wha experience

& M,M ,oM F' NANC rEPRESENTM AL ni" of Directors sponsorship Board Ottice Chief Returning C™° S afFAIRS "M "XaT.am CLUB 1S Awareness „■ Equality CAMPUS > Over tOO details. Ecohawks See www.wlusu. SERVICES *STUDENT" mCMT Bacchus ST ACTIVITIES Activities Team Team sKi'S. Shinerama Matt Symes

LAUREN MILLET at the half; however, they tightened up Writer Sports their defence and came out for a powerful second frame. HUMAN The Laurier Golden Hawks women's bas- The team once again came together and MARKETING ketball team put together a surprisingly pulled an astonishing upset, defeating stais m long playoff run, but it eventually came to Brock 83-72. McGrath had an outstanding BUS rt an end on Saturday, with a 68-53 loss to game, leading another balanced offensive '%wK°D«™3" .v«™« McMaster ProlSS?D in the OUA West final. attack with 32 points to tie her career high. Market Research & Training After finishing the regular season in fifth Second-year guard Jillian Ritsma pitched Relations place at 11-11, the Hawks slipped into a in a strong 12-point effort. Public Recruitment playoff spot to face the 14-8 Western With a pair of upsets in their back pock- Radio Laurier Mustangs in the first round on February et, the Hawks were set for an OUA West Video Productions 15. Coming off a close loss late in the regu- showdown with the 17-5 McMaster Team lar season, the Hawks were out for revenge, Marauders, with a berth in the CIS Web and Coach Stu Julius inserted some cre- Championships on the line. ative new defensive strategies into the Apparently, someone forgot to tell the playbook, which he felt caught their Marauders about WLU's Cinderella story. London rivals off-guard. Mac came on strong right from the start, oyMENT After a tight first half, the teams were forcing the Hawks to play catch-up for OT EMPI- knotted at 36. Laurier came out strong in most of the game. Late in the second half, part-timeTIME the second, however, and took control of Laurier pulled within five, but the pjta shacK the game. Leading by six in the dying sec- Marauders then quickly distanced them- Nightc ub onds, WLU shut down Western's last-ditch selves to secure a 68-53 win. Turret pizza pizza effort to close the gap, allowing only one "This was a game we should have won," n three pointer to prevail 70-67 in a dazzling remarked a disappointed Julius. "The dif- Wilt's Restaura yogen Fruz team effort. ference here from the other games was that Spot1 Perpetual top-scorer Meaghan McGrath nobody else stepped up to score, and that The Centre joy et led the team with 21 points, followed by really hurt us." Harvey's union fourth-year guard Kerri Jilesen who netted McGrath was again the point leader, net- 15, but the balanced offence was crucial in ting 24 for the Hawks. Jilesen put up 11 Sub the win, noted Julius. before fouling out midway through the Mr. "The game was never really a question second half. LFRID/. for us," he stated. "There's not a big differ- Though the ladies managed to go one ence between first and sixth place because game deeper into the playoffs than last \ everyone had beat everyone else during year's squad, they look poised for a rebuild- What will the regular season." ing year next season, as McGrath and After upsetting the Mustangs at home, Jilesen are likely finished their illustrious fit ■ the Hawks took their show back on the careers at WLU. be your road, heading to St. Catharine's to take on The duo finished first and 1| second on the the 19-3 Brock Badgers on Saturday, team in all five major statistical categories February 18. With Brock ranked eighth in this season (scoring, assists, rebounds, the.country, Laurier was going Lo need to blocks and steals), and McGrath became bring their A-game for the second time in a the OUA's all-time leading scorer in the last week. game of the regular season. Both will be Early on, the Hawks struggled a little to sorely missed. / M fesssßsa keep up with the Badgers and were down Tsi CAN GET INVOLVED. YOU [the Cord Weekly| Is. WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 11

SPORTS IN BRIEF WLU s men with brooms Men's Basketball Hawks upset Guelph, now face Brock Despite sporting a worse record entering their OUA West quar- terfinal at Guelph on Saturday afternoon, the veteran Hawks take Ontario's top prize squad played with a sense of urgency and upset the much younger Gryphons squad 81-74. Hot on the heels of Canada's Olympic gold medal in the same sport, our curlers find their own Midas touch Andrew MacKay scored 20 to lead a balanced offence that also sawWade Currie, Rob Innes and Bert Riviere crack double-digits.

- From CURLING, cover That ultimately lies out of their eight-ball by losing their first two WLU travels to St. Catharines hands, though. For now, these matches of the round-robin, 10-5 Weekend Scorecard tonight to battle Brock in a Gushues-in-the-making are to Queen's and 10-6 to the eventu- rematch of last year's OUA West It's been a busy time for most of focused on the national champi- al winners from Brock. Strong play Men's Curling semi-final, hoping to improve the guys, with Bennett having to onships taking place in Winnipeg from Nicol and third-year vice upon their 32-point shellacking. travel home from his business co- taking place March 22-26, and Stacey McCormack were enough, Toronto a weekly basis. then op in on setting their sights on a however, to bounce back with a 9- Laurier 8 - Brock 4 And after spending a week in repeat in 2007. 2 trouncing of the Waterloo Figure Skating Switzerland prior to Reading Week "It's certainly going to be per- Warriors, the ladies a - securing Windsor 8 Laurier 6 PBs punctuate OUA Championships with his non-Laurier rink, Francis ceived by other universities that spot in the semi-finals and a - jokingly noted his constant this team will be the team to beat chance for redemption against Laurier 6 Queen's 3 Laurier s figure skating team put * - absence from Waterloo this term. [next year] no question about it," Queen's. Laurier 7 - Queen's 4 together some strong perform- "I've probably been away at grins McCormack. "All four of Alas, it was not to be. The teams ances to finish fifth overall in the least half as much as I've been them are returning." stayed close until Queen's skip OUA Championships this week- here," he estimates. "I've missed Of course, they did manage to Stephanie Gray broke a 4-4 dead- Women's Curling end. Some highlights included about three and a half weeks of find a few seconds for celebration lock by making a tough double- third place finishes in the team school [since January]." after Sunday's win. "We had a few tap to score a four-ender and put synchro skate and the Bronze Still, with an OUA gold to their sips of Guinness out of the cup in the game out of reach, eventually Rhythm quartet of Erin Csumrik, credit, it all seems very worthwhile the locker room," jokes Bennett. winning 8-5. The Hawks would Queen's 10 - Laurier 5 Jessica Cadenhead, Brittany right about now. is came The men's rink "We to the game prepared." settle for a bronze medal, while Brock 10 - Laurier 6 Wright and Katelyn Jolivel. merely hoping their success Brock went on to down Queen's 9- Jolivel also placed second in the brings more attention to a perpet- Women take bronze 7 for the title of OUA supremacy. Laurier 9 - Waterloo 2 solo short program. Csumrik, ually strong program that is Despite falling short, the ** Meghan Tallevi and Kara Queen's - chronically dwarfed by the WLU Though overshadowed by the women were "very, very happy 8 Laurier 5 Latourell all put together strong football ethos. provincial banner brought home with their play," according to performances in their respective "Football will always be the by the men, WLU's women's rink coach McCormack. Like the men, * Laurier wins Gold Medal solo efforts to secure fourth number one sport here, but I hope nabbed a bronze medal at the they will now look forward to the ** Laurier wins Bronze Medal place finishes. This marks the with our win, we'll get a little more provincial playdowns as well. CIS Championships in Winnipeg. end of the 2005-06figure skating respect within the Athletic depart- Rookie skip Hollie Nicol's young season. ment," admits Francis. rink put themselves behind the

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101 things to do·in Waterlo~

101. Ride your bike on the trails 96. See at least one movie you've 88.Ha To make the student experience more enriching, Cord Features consulted a crack team of throughout the city. -April never heard of at Waterloo's at the Cunningham, Special Projects Princess Cinema. floor. 'experts' including current students, alumni, Dr. Rose hart and the Mayor of Waterloo, to Editor 95. Get kicked out of a bar. 87. Gc 100. Have a themed party for no pet th form the ultimate list of things to do in Waterloo before you graduate. Get started today reason whatsoever. Sexy parties, 94. Smuggle a bottle of wine into all the pirate parties, mystery dinners; it's Waterloo Park at night and watch on the in order to finish all 101 things before you graduate and leave this town forever. damn good fun. -Sydney Helland, the ducks while you sip and snug­ kid. - Photography Manager gle with your significant (or not­ Comrr so ."significant) ,other. Stu die 99. Eat at Yummiyaki (Northfield & Davenport) for all-you-can-eat 93. All that mud that covers 86. D sushi. Willison · Field in the Spring? Polydc Throw on your least favourite 98. Participate in a Mongolian Grill sweats, get so·me friends, and get 85. On eating contest. If you don't exceed dirty. OneC< at least four bowls, I don't respect you. -Mike Brown, Sports Editor 92. Make the trek down to 84.Bu Waterloo Town Square and buy a field. 97. Drink a side order of suicide hot dog from the street vendor. sauce at Marty's. Your friends may 83.Do 'say' you're crazy, but secretly 91. Go to a Laurier International 'sampi they'll respect you. party. Stop at the LCBO first and check out the international beer 82. Stt section; might I suggest Faxe beer? ings 3 -Melanie Paradis, third-year be a uti Global Studies and Political enth l Science busint Peters 90. Go to the Rain tree Cafe. fights nessec 89. Salsa dancing at the Flying Dog the Bl on Thursdays! -Jill Yantzi, third­ and I year Psychology favors -Jorda Mana!

81. Ge Cord. II

WEDNESDAY MARCH 1. 2006 + rloo before you graduate

movie you've 88. Have a pre-drink in the library 80. Get 30 friends together, grab 66. Go to Taco Tuesday at Ethel's 48: Go skating at Kitchener city 27. Go to the Royal Medieval Faire at Waterloo's at the video carols on the third a stereo and your OneCard, hop Lounge. -Mike Thorne, third-year hall. in Waterloo Park in September. floor. on a random GRT bus and have a Kinesiology 26. Rent a video at GenX. flippin transport party. 47. Check out the Farmer's of a bar. 87. Go to the Waterloo Park and 65. Go to the Elora Gorge. -David Market for good deals on food 25. Go camping at Bingeman's. pet the miniature horse and see 79. Pre-drink for football games Stark, Laurier Alumni and explore the town of St. all the cute animals! Then, swing at 7:00 in the am at least once. - Jacobs. 24. Try the Crippler at The Chill on the swings like you were a little Kyle Howard, third-year 64. Ride the King St. bus from and Grill. -Cst. Adam Parsons, and snug­ kid. -Bailey Gross, third-year Communications Studies and beginning to end. 46. Do a drunken break-dance jig Community Safety & Security (or not- Communications and Film Fine Art on the hawk. -Alex Hayter, A&E Studies 63. take your favourite prof out Editor 23. Treat your tastebuds to the 78. Bring a date to the Perimeter for a drink. -Danielle laboni, Elmira Maple Syrup Festival; it's that covers 86. Do a keg stand - Poly Institute for a lecture then drink third-year Political Science 45. Go to cheap wing night at sweet. the Spring? Polydorou, third-year Geography in their gorgeous Black Hole Marty's. -Dan Polischuk, News least favourite Bistro overlooking the city. 62. Go to Amateur Night at Editor 22. Sail down the snow tubes at friends, and get 85. Order pizza off someone else's Roxanne's. Chicopee. OneCard. 77. Climb the whiskey barrels at 44. Sing karaoke at The Spur. Seagrams'. Clothing optional. - 61. Hook up with your T.A. -Scott 21. Take a balloon ride. It's expen­ trek 84. Build a snow penis on Willison Nate Brown, third-year Rinkoff, third-year 43. Turn a residence lounge into a sive but well worth the money for field. Kinesiology Communication Studies fully stocked bar for a friend's the priceless view. birthday. -Andrew Partridge, 83. Do the Brick. Brewery tour and 76. Do a 'money shot' at Phil's. 60. Get quoted in The Cord. -Luc third-year Psychology 20. Go to the K-W Symphony 'sample' the unlimited beer. Joye, third-year Honours -Tony Ferguson, International 75. Go streaking through the Economics and Accounting 42. Go to Mel's. Whether it's post­ Editor beer 82. Study in as manyWLU build­ Concourse, down to the AC. bar or the next day, it's always a ings as possible. I have seen Bring your green hat. -Andrea 59. Get involved in Rez Life. good idea. 19. Make friends with Security. - beautiful sunsets from the sev­ Battista, third-year English and -Natasha Lopeke, Laurier Alumni Cst. Shawna MacDonald, enth floor of the library, made Psychology 41. Volunteer at St. John's soup Community Safety & Security business connections in the 58. Make out with a girl at Phil's. kitchen. -Dan Robert, President Peters Building, seen post bar fist­ 74. Attend a pancake kegger. -Cody Rosenberg, third-year ofWLUSU 18. Make the drive to the Drayton fights in the Torque room, wit­ Psychology Festival Theatre; it's well worth it. nessed late-night booty calls in 73. Go on at least one Water 40. Visit the University of the Bricker Academic Building, Buffalo tour. 57. Go on a Magic Mushroom trip Waterloo's Earth Sciences 17. Lions and tigers and bears, oh and I was even offered sexual through Waterloo Park. Museum for a Dinosaur tour. my! Head to the African Lion favors in the Science Building. 72. Try some suicide wings at -Waterloo Mayor Herb Epp Safari to see the crazy monkeys. -Jordan Jocius, Photography Wilf's. 56. Go to a football game. -Coach Manager Jeffries 39. Take a canoe down the Grand 16. If you're the brave type, head 71. Perform at open mic night at River. down to the Four Seasons Nudist 81. Get your photo in The Vocal Wilf's. 55. Check out Mackenzie King's Resort for a life-changing experi­ Cord. house in Woodside Park, it's a 38. Hike the many sections of the ence. 70. Dance at the Turret. National Historic Site. -Dr. Bob Walter Bean Grand River Trail. Rosehart 15. You have to try the fish and 69. Have sex on campus. 37. Go mountain biking on the chips at Sonny's. -Sgt. Rick 54. See a play at the Stratford fes­ Powerline Trail. Cousineau, Community Safety & 68. Eat at Benny's. -Alexis Scheer, tival. Security third-year Psychology and 36. Go to every bar within the Sociology 53. Have a 'pork' hamburger at Huether Hotel in one night. 1tl-. Visit Shakedown Street. -Jacob The Harmony Gr,ill. -Dr. Rosehart Pries second-year Political Science 67. Drink with Jim and Laura [the and Mayor Epp 35. Drop by the Clay and Glass and Global Studies Business profs]. -Jessica Brown, Gallery and go to a Sunday 'Clay third-year Business 52. Go to every bar at least once. Day.' 13. Dance on the pole at Phil's. - -Megan Mutcheson, U ofW Dave Alexander fifth-year English, 34. Take a drive North of Elmira Psychology · 51. See a show at Starlight or hit it on Sundays to see the Mennonite up on a Friday night for DJ culture in full effect. -Dr. 12. Walk around the Concourse all Charles. -Joe Turcotte, staff writer Rosehart day and talk to people. -Yusuf Faqiri, third-year Political Science 50. Go to the Waterloo Busker 33. Attend the Spirit of Waterloo and History Carnival in the summer. -Allan game (the high school spinoff of Cayenne the Battle of Waterloo football 11. Go on an exchange. -Daddy game) at University Stadium. Mac 49. Attend an 'authentic' Oktoberfest celebration at the 32. Attend Ice Dogs, Wonders of 10. Learn a new language. Concordia Club or the Winter, Uptown Country Festival Transylvania Club. and the Quilt Festival. -Mayor 9. Rollerblade through RIM Park. Epp 8. Volunteer as a peer helper. 31. Slide down the drop-off waterslide at Moses Springer 7. Go tubing in St. Mary's.

30. Go to Jane Bond for antijitos 6. Take the Historical Walking Tour and martinis. -Carly Beath, ofWaterloo. -Brandon Currie, The Opinion Editor CordEIC

29. Admire the Perimeter Institute 5. Eat a MacDonell Village gyro (preferably while under the influ­ ence of some kind of substance). 4. Write an angry letter to The Cord. 28. Eat at Bhima's Warung - it's likely the most you will ever pay 3. Go to the Butterfly Emporium in for a meal in Waterloo, but well Cambridge. - Bev, the dining hall worth the money. -Jason Shim, lady Online Production Manager 2. See the student-written and directed plays at FR!NGE Festival

l. Get a degree. The Cord Weekly 14.￿ WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 Student Life

Pan-university sex survery says... we're a bunch ofperverted cheaters Sexpert Emma McFarlane gives us the stats on CampusKiss.com's annual sex survey, including where, how and how much we like to do it

prised me concerned the number safe was undoubtedly the con- So why would so many of us go said they would give it a go versus of sexual partners students have dom, which clocked in at first for pleasure with the palm instead the smaller 42 percent of men who had and how many out there are place with 55 percent saying they of doing it with a partner? Maybe were into it. pledging to be monogamous in opt for the jiffy jimmie. With 33 we're not getting what we like! The freakiest place to do it? A EMMA MCFARLANE relationships. percent of the vote, the pill came When asked "what they wanted morbid 46 percent said they would CK found that 30 percent of in as the second best way to fend more of during sex", 41 percent of like to get it on in a graveyard; this those polled have only had two to off those unwanted sexual reper- males said that they would like gives a whole new meaning to get- The world today is not the one our five partners; this means that the cussions. Ten percent of those "more experimentation." ting your freak on. grandparents and parents knew. remaining 70 percent of you are polled unfortunately decided they These guys should try and pair So what made CampusKiss.com Looking back even five years, it's either holding out or putting out were too cool to use barriers while up with some of the 62 percent of want to explore what intrigued hard to imagine life without your like mad. in the buff. Now I know where students that stated they enjoy Canadian students? Their website mp3 player at your side. Imagine The second blow-me-out-of- those cheaters from above came using sex toys and other novelties. is dedicated to connecting univer- trying to write a paper without the the-water stat was the answer to from: they were offspring of the What do women really want? sities and colleges across the aid of your two-pound laptop. And "do you practice monagamy?" same idiots who didn't teach their Female students stated that they nation, and by knowing what was forget telephone numbers; it's When they did find that one per- kids to use protection. would opt for an increase in fore- the norm and what was wanted by your MSN address that you hand son they were willing to acknowl- play. On average, it the youth of today, they could offer out to potential suitors. edge as a "significant other," only takes a little more the best electronic dating platform It's an increasingly electronic 52 percent of the students The freakiest place to do it? A then just penetra- available. dating environment, and with answered that they remain faithful tion to get a The website offers an interface findings that 87 out of a hundred and monogamous. I'm hoping this morbid 46 percent said they woman's engine that incorporates a search engine college and university students statistic is a typo. revved, so 30 per- for meeting friends, flings, or dat- engage in "virtual sex", it's time to Then again, we have to question would like to get it on in a cent of them sup- ing. It currently has over 73,000 high-tech on. get your mojo the external validity of a study like graveyard; this gives a whole new ported this result. members and the number is grow- The results come from the first this. Those who are willing to When it comes ing exponentially. It's defintely annual "Canadian Campus Kiss & answer surveys like these may be meaning to getting your freak on. to the party venue worth a look. Tell Sex Survey" which was con- more outgoing, more likely to be however, women Although this is ducted by CampusKiss.com, a experimental, adventure-seeking tend to be the CampusKiss. corn's first attempt at website that has been helping stu- or a physical pleasure-seeker. adventurous and scrutinizing the sexual practices of dents hook up since they Either that or we're all going to hell Not all of the students polled experimental ones. When Canadian students, I look forward launched five years ago. in a Trojan-lined basket. even required a partner to have Goodwill dumpster, airport run- to next year's findings. Hopefully CK surveyed over 2,500 students On that note however, a reassur- their fun. In fact, 93 percent way, Alexander Graham Bell we'll see a downward trend in from 150 different universities and ing 90 out of 100 stated that their admitted to getting it on with their Museum, back of your mom's car cheating. colleges nation-wide and came up schools supported and promoted hand, dildo, plunger, or other sex while she's driving, and second with some interesting and at times safe sex, so there was no excuse toy. Viva la masturbation! So that's story of a double-decker bus were suprising good-to-know statistics. not to wrap during the act. how Canadian students are keep- listed as possible "come hither" The top two factoids that sur- The most popular way to keep ing warm this winter. places, 50.3 percent of women [email protected] .fx .. . M | Jg: i THE CORD Wefjoyl %?8 IfP WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2008 15 French women don't get fat, our culture Health expert Jennifer O'Neill critiques the book behind the latest diet fad; what works for the French won't work in North America

JENNIFER O'NEILL to getting on track is recording Body Break everything you eat for three weeks. Right from the start this "non-diet" If you haven't already read French turns into a diet similar to Weight Women Don't GetFar, you've prob- Watchers or Sonth Beach; analyz- ably heard about the new diet ing what you eat. However, if craze it's spawned. In the book, you're already eating the food, you author Mireille Guiliano lets us in probably do not realize what is on the dieting 'secret' that French good or bad. Thus, you may begin women have known for years. this diet more confused than Without regurgitating the entire when you started. book, the 'secret' amounts to: Second, this book gives you keeping a food journal, savouring 'permission' to eat whatever you what you eat, eating slow, getting want. Telling someone they can variety in your diet, drinking have chocolate may lead to confu- water, controlling your portions sion. When starting a diet, you and making eating a ritual. need to be strict. If chocolate is Most of this will sound familiar forbidden for the first few weeks of if you've ever read a diet book a diet while healthy eating habits before. Going on the tips that are introduced, this sets some Guiliano offers, I don't really dis- immediate boundaries. Slowly, agree with any of them. In fact, I chocolate can become a treat think everything she says is again, but only after old habits are important and worthwhile. But broken. If you tell people they can this book could be more confusing have all these rich French foods than it is helpful. when they are trying to lose As an overweight nation, when weight, they may still over-cat the Contributed Photo it comes to diet and nutrition sweets. ALL AMERICAN GIRL - Unlike the French, Paris Hilton is too busy making sex tapes to sit down and savour a meal. advice, we always want the quick French culture is much different and easy fix. The challenge lies in than the North America's. Let's weight, nutrition alone will not Weight training is essential. appearance. the "tell me what to do and I'll do face it, we live in a fast-paced soci- shed the pounds. It is only one of Muscles are your metabolism. I am not saying don't try it" mentality. We have been flood- ety that doesn't always have an the three components to achiev- Weight training will speed up your Guiliano's program. The book does ed by deprivation plans. We have hour to prepare a meal and sit ing the body you desire. The other metabolism by letting your body have great things to offer and is a been told that carbohydrates are there and eat it. So, although this two are moderate aerobic exercise burn more calories and be more great starting point to getting fit. bad. We have been told that carbo- diet may be ideal for Europeans, it and weight training. I stress mod- efficient. This is not limited to Do be aware, however, that we hydrates are essential. Diet book simply does not have as much of a erate aerobic exercise. Too much weight machines. Dumbbells, sta- don't live in France. after diet book seems to contradict natural place in North American cardio will do nothing; you will see bility balls, medicine balls or tub- the one that came before. tradition. weight loss, but it will only be ing are all weight-bearing exercis- In French Women, the first step Lastly, if you are looking to lose water weight and muscle tissue. es that will give you that 'toned'

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KEREN GOTTFRIED other documents. Cord International "They just swooped down, went inside," Tribune editor-in-chief Filipino president Gloria Ninez Cacho Olivares said on a Macapagal Arroyo declared a state local radio show. "This is just like of national emergency in the martial law." island nation last Friday after halt- The President claims that raid- ing an attempted military coup. ing the newspaper was a neces- The police have filed cases sary step to halt those trying to stir against 16 individuals, including unrest in the Philippines. military officials and members of A collection of lawyers is plan- Congress, in connection with the ning to take Arroyo to the Supreme plan. Two protests against presi- Court this week regarding the legal dent Arroyo's declaration of a state implications of instituting her of emergency, each with about emergency rule. Lawyer Romeo 5,000 demonstrators, were broken Capulong of the Public Interest up using fire hoses and batons. Law Centre is hoping for a tempo- "I am declaring a state of emer- rary restraining order on the gency because of the clear threat emergency powers which he con- to the nation," Arroyo declared in sidered "definitely unconstitu- her address. "This is my warning tional." against those who threaten the This coup attempt is one of government: the whole weight of twelve in the past two decades in the law will fall on your treason." the Philippines. Still, some ana- A state of emergency has many lysts accuse Arroyo of playing the effects: arrests without warrants, coup card to gain sympathy from extending detention without the public. charge, rally bans and shutting "The government is overreact- down agencies of free press. Also, ing," claimed Earl Parreno from the president can issue executive the Institute of Political and orders without approval by Electoral Reform. "There may be a Congress. threat from a small faction within The issue is sparking controver- the army, but it's not serious sy because it is reminiscent of the enough to topple [President martial law imposed by former Arroyo's] government." dictator Ferdinand Marcos, ousted Some opposition parties are exactly 20 years ago this Friday. Fie using the opportunity to bring imposed the same law on the peo- attention to three impeachment ple of the Philippines for nine bids made against Arroyo in years, arresting and executing September when she was accused without charges and eliminating of rigging the nation's last elec- press freedoms. tion. Evidence against her includ- On Saturday morning, Arroyo ed tapes of her asking election ordered police to raid The Daily officials to ensure that she won by Tribune, a pro-opposition news- a million votes. She claimed the Contributed Photo paper. They padlocked the office evidence was faulty, and avoided GIVE THEM BACK THEIR RIGHTS - A Filipino migrant worker protests at the Philippine Consulate General in Hong after taking the remaining copies impeachment on a technicality. Kong on February 26. Dozens of Filipinos working in Hong Kong staged a protest calling on Philippine president of the paper and confiscating Gloria Arroyo to resign and end a state of emergency she imposed to preempt an alleged coup. New highway driving Ibiza residents mad

TONY FERGUSON mally easy-going residents of the of land can be crossed by bicycle. International Editor island where they have marched, Some feel the highway is picketed and lain down in front of encroaching on burgeoning There's big development on the heavy machinery tourist-oriented development. tiny Spanish island of Ibiza. "The police had to remove ns by "The highway is the straw that Usually known for its non-stop force," explained Casetes. "It's not broke the camel's back," said 'swinging' nightlife, the construc- just my house; it's all of Ibiza Hazel Morgan, president of tion of a new freeway on the isle is they're going to damage." Friends of the Earth in Ibiza. rousing anger with some resi- Morgan came dents, while others are putting "I love this island and I plan to to Ibiza 32 years ago themselves on the front lines to after leaving her stop the building. defend it until I can't take it native Sussex to enjoy According to Ibiza's conserva- all the lovely things tive government, the new highway anymore." that the island had to is a necessary development that offer, which she will prevent traffic accidents. It - Pere Torres Casetes, Ibiza resident claims are now disap- will also serve as a link between pearing. Ibiza's capital, the airport and the He sees the uprising against the She now spends her mornings town of San Antonio. new highway as something slight- at the homes that are to be demol- Outrage over the highway has ly unorthodox for Ibiza's residents ished to make way for the road. mobilized thousands of Ibiza resi- to take part in but also feels the She waits to hear when and where dents who see the 25 kilometres of construction of the six-lane the next bulldozer will begin level- freeway as an unneeded stretch ofroad must be stopped. ling and once the location is con- encroachment and as too large for "It's incredible what's happen- firmed, she and hundreds of other the small island of 100,000 which ing ... I love this island and I plan volunteers scramble to meet the is only 14 km wide and 42 km long. to defend it until 1 can't take it any heavy machines. Pere Torres Casetes, a 53-year- more," Casetes said. The disgruntled protesters join old bank director and father of Last week, an anti-highway rally a growing number of Spaniards three, has never been the protest- drew more than 20,000 people and resident foreigners who are ing type. Not once in his life has he who speculated about the politi- publicly expressing their frustra- taken part in any acts of civil dis- cians, developers and hotel own- tion with the increasing develop- Contributed Photo ers obedience, but when he got wind who stood to benefit from the ment of Spain's offshore islands CAREFREE HIGHWAY - Thoughts of the effects of a new highway on the of the new $520 million (CAN) highway. They also saw the project and sunny coasts. isle of Ibiza are probably the furthest thing from the minds of these sun- freeway he joined the other nor- as useless, since the same stretch bathers, mostly tourists, lying on one of Ibiza's 72 beaches. [THE Weekly Cord I International WEDNESDAY MARCH 1, 2006 < 19 Turin 2006: pride, egotism, wealth For Richard Togman, the Olympics were a nationalistic spectacle where only rich nations held an advantage and spectators cheered for total strangers

are not celebrated for their merit, but for how they contribute to their nation's medal rankings. For many, the milliseconds that sepa- RICHARD TOGMAN rate the gold medalist from last CordInternational place personify the chasm of greatness that separates 'success- With the Torino Olympics merci- ful' countries from the footnotes fully over, we can all breathe a col- of world culture. lective sigh ofrelief: we won't have We delude ourselves into think- to endure another mindless dis- ing that the very nature of what it play of neurotic nationalism for means to be Canadian somehow another two years. vaults our athletes onto the podi- The games are neither a show- um. But as reasonable people case for athleticism nor a tribute know, the truth is that it's a matter to the strength and endurance of of economics and luck. Rich mankind. They're a show of petty nations have a decided edge in the nationalism designed to distract Olympic games as they can afford the masses from what really mat- the investment and infrastructure ters, fulfilling the role of a mod- necessary to manufacture elite ern-day Roman coliseum. athletes. Government funding for top athletes is enormous, pay- With Torino over, we can all breathe a ing for training, facilities and sigh of relief: we won't have to livelihoods, squandering endure a midless display of neurotic precious resources on nationalism for two more years the metaphysi- cal pleasures of Millions of citizens from around bolstering national pride. the world cheer for virtually Even the very location of the anonymous athletes who werelate Olympics is a contest of pride, to through the cult of nationalism egotism and wealth. The Games that has been embedded into our are almost always a money-losing psyche by the educational estab- adventure. They burden their lishment and our paternalistic hosts with untold amounts of debt culture. We care not about the as their lavish facilities become accomplishments of the main obsolete after the world's spotlight attractions but wish to laud our- has moved on. Again, it's only the selves for our arbitrary connection wealthy elite who can even com- to these individuals by place of pete for Olympic hosting rights. residence. Not every country can spend bil- The Olympics serve as a tool of lions of dollars on national gratifi- self-congratulation as we equate cation. the successes and failures of our If we really wanted to celebrate athletes with our own self worth. the spirit of Man and the achieve- When the Canadian hockey team ments of individual athletes, we lost, it was not just a loss for a should fix the location of the sports team but a major psycho- Olympic events and establish an logical blow to our country. For a international fund to ensure all few trying days, our national deserving athletes can attend. In worth depended on whether our doing so, we can tear the games hockey team obtained a shiny from the clutches of the nation- piece of metal or not. state and place them firmly in the The games are about the hands of all humanity, regardless nation-state, not individual ath- of race, religion or country. letes. Personal accomplishments MODERN-DAY COLISEUM ROLE FULFILLED - Actress Theodora Siarkou, who plays the role of high priestess, holds a replica of an ancient pot which contains the flame during the Ceremony of the Lighting of the Olympic Flame for the Torino 2006 Winter Olympic Games at the Ancient Olympia site on November 27, 2005 in Olympia, Greece. One year will getyou life. The world is waiting for you. What are you waiting for? | ...an exciting new lite in the world erf law. Post-secondary education or jtmik

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Xword Economic Comic By: G. McCallum by Fraser King

Across: Down:

2. Not manifesting characteristic 1.3.14 clinical symptoms. 2. Where The Simpsons takes 4. The fanlike posterior structure place of a lobster, shrimp, or other crus- 3. The albumin contained in milk tacean and obtained from whey 7. What dolphins travel in 4. A sea cucumber of the genus 9. Owner ofOld Navy Holothuria of the southern Pacific 10 death do us part and Indian oceans 11. Jesus' daddy 5 the Lion 13. Band that produced "Stupid 6. briefly shut the eyes Girl" and "Cherry Lips" 7. Style of pirate leg 14. Strong dislike or hatred; abhor- 8. Past tense of do Not Sure Career Path to rence 15. Toronto shortform What Take?

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ALEX HAYTER A&E Editor

Grand TheftAuto: San Andreas has been getting a lot of press coverage over the last year. Apart from being one ofthe top- rated and highest selling games of all time it has also gained infamy through the 'Hot Coffee' game modification scandal. This was an internet download created by game hackers who tapped into an unfinished, unofficial part of the game, allowing users to access a sex mini-game. After many (extremely uninformed) political and legal allegations, the game was taken off of shelves and given a new ESRB rating. To be honest, the whole furor was rather overblown, while the modification itself was more of a joke than a piece of smutty enter- tainment. the internet communi- ty's 'contribution' to the game threatens the existence of the game's developer, Rockstar North, which could jeopardize any future titles from being released for PC. But now, that same GTA internet community has released some- thing much more worth its while. Multi Theft Auto is a modification allowing owners of the PC version of San Andreas to play it online against other gamers. Since it's a free download of only 4.3 megabytes, it's also a simple pro- gram to install. Multi Theft Auto has appeared in the past under the guise of the previous two GTA games, GTA 3 and Vice City. While mildly popu- lar, these mods offered a sketchy version of online play, allowing Contributed Photo

users to romp around town in var- CONGA LINE, GTA STYLE - Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas can now be played online with the currently developing modification, Multi Theft Auto. This ious roles of police, hookers, mod allows players across the globe to challenge each other in races, as well as participate in mass stunt derbies, making for truly addictive gameplay. sailors, etc. MTA: San Andreas brings an altogether more pol- settings. Startup time is fast and racing, stunts and destruction der- around the world is as fun as it ing. While MTA San Andreas is still ished and user-friendly affair to much improved from the original bies. At this stage, it is impossible sounds, the modification is still in its infancy (only released last the table. game; the online San Andreas is to leave your car and run around; hampered by some problems, week), we can still expect many The online-user interface is fast free of AI pedestrians and cars, play is restricted to your vehicle. apart from the expected bugs. improvements as the modification and extremely effective, stylistical- meaning only maps are loaded. This setback is solved by the abili- Player deaths is a major problem: matures. Download it at ly reminiscent of Valve's revolu- The playing area is operated ty to change vehicle-type (cars, when your car explodes, you have http://www.mtasa.com. Also keep tionary Steam browser software. upon user-created maps which do bikes or helicopters) through to wait until everyone else is dead, an eye on SA: MA, a different mul- The software installs straight to not require downloading, as they floating icons located around or initiate a vote to restart the tiplayer mod focusing on shoot- your start menu, and with a sim- are already installed in the GTA maps. match. em-up action antics (www.sa- ple click loading up a menu allows folder. Several game types are While playing San Andreas Democratic voting is also a nui- mp.com) you to browse servers and change offered, including free roaming, against up to 20 people from sance with constant map chang- Metal 101: turn your head from dead to lead JEANNE FRONDA timent "metal-ness" or "rock on." quick way to get the party started #3 RoCK DoTS But don't make the newbie The Manitoban To do this right, your pinky fin- is to turn to your friendly neigh- blunder of putting rock dots above ger and index finger should be lift- bour and mention one of the "big When writing your name and a consonant such as "n." The WINNIPEG (CUP) - Trying to feel ed up and your other two fingers four" thrash metal acts: Metallica, number out on a piece of paper to Spinal Tap mockumentary has like you belong in the heavy metal should be tucked in your palm and Megadeth, Anthrax or Slayer. hand to your brand new metal rock dots over the "n" in its title, world is pretty intimidating for held down by your thumb. Make Chances are your neighbour loves buddies, make sure you dot your but those filmmakers are darn those who don't know the differ- sure you don't make the amateur one of these bands. So the door Os and zeroes with heavy metal professionals. People will think ence between Pushead and Vic mistake of extending out your will be wide open for an intelligent umlauts (or rock dots, for those of you saw Spinal Tap for the first Rattlehead. thumb; that is an American Sign conversation about which band you who don't know how to pro- time the other night; an oversight You can't just walk around wear- Language gesture meaning "I love has a better headbanging tech- nounce it). Nothing says,"I fuckin' like this could mean you'll be ing a Slayer T-shirt, clutching the you." nique or which band members love metal and I know how to spell singing along to "Master of latest copy of Metal Edge forever Although the latter phrase is you think looked the best in Motorhead properly! NYAAAH!" Puppets" all by your lonesome. and not expect a seasoned metal- likely how you feel about your skintight bubble gum jeans back more than a few lovingly placed head to approach you and ask you favourite metal heroes, throwing in the '80s. umlauts. what you really think of "throwing an "I love you" while rocking out at the goat" these days. But even if a concert is downright insulting to you're not sure if you're ready to the intended meaning behind the immerse yourself in the head- evil horns. (Note: Be cautious banging world of metal, here are when using this gesture while in three quick pointers on how to feel the Mediterranean, as the symbol a little more at home when you get has a rather indecent meaning in "caught in a mosh." some countries.)

#1 THROWING THE GOAT #2 THE "BIG FOUR"

Folks, this ain't like cow tipping. Trying to make new friends is hard "Throwing the goat" is the heavy for everyone, but if you're sitting in metal sign that fans have been your seat during the uneventful using for years to express the sen- pre-opener minutes of a show, a 24 ￿ WEDNESDAY MARCH 1. 20Q6 ArtsEntertainment & The Cord Weekly The NeverendingWhite lights' story The one-man-band's sole member, Daniel Victor, talks to The Cord about big singles, even bigger concept albums and absolutely huge live performances, as well as what to expect from him when he hits the Starlight Lounge on Thursday

DRU JEFFRIES Cord A&E

"This project started over five years ago with my visions of mak- ing a different kind of album, something more meaningful than what's out there," says Daniel Victor, the wunderkind behind Windsor-based one-man-band Neverending White Lights. "1 wanted to release something that wouldn't just get lost in the medi- ocrity of alternative bands coming out." So far, it looks like-he's been suc- cessful. His hit single, "The Grace [featuring Dallas Green]", is cur- rently #17 on the MuchMusic countdown and #6 on Edgelo2's Thursday 30. Now Daniel is taking his show on the road, and to Waterloo's Starlight Lounge on March 2. But the band's live show promis- es to be much different than their Contributed Photo studio work. Unlike on their CANADIAN POWER - Daniel Victor (left) peforms songs from Neverending White Lights' concept album Act I, pictured onstage with Raine Maida of Lady album, Act I: Goodbye Friends Our of Peace. Maida has a guest appearance on the album, and could possibly be joining Victor on his Canadian tour at select including the Heavenly Bodies, Victor won't be shows, Starlight. or playing every instrument have Supergarage, will be one Act I me. If they're not, it's okay too. I'll This album represents everything diet... . I went slightly mad during a different singer for each song. alumnus joining Victor on stage. do my best to perform these songs different," he said. the process." "I will be doing this with a live He sings on one of the album's without them. I'm not trying to He poured five trying years of Even so, he doesn't seem to be band behind me, and 1 will be many highlights, "A Littlepiece", mimic or imitate the singers, only his life into the creation of the slowing down anytime soon. Aside handling the majority of the vocal and he'll also fill the opening slot interpret the songs for the live album, and it shows. "It got really from interviews like this one, duties. I think people will enjoy for the show, as he has at other audience. And true fans will intense along the way because I Daniel is spending his time post- versions live of these songs since NWL concerts. appreciate that," Victor mused. was doing it all alone. Each day ing messages to fans on his official they translate really well. I have Some of the vocalists that you True fans are one thing that and night would find me writing website (www.neverendingwhite- brought out artists in the past to shouldn't expect to see at the Daniel should have plenty of. Act I: music, lyrics, recording demos, lights.com), writing material for a help me on stage, and I'm sure I'll Starlight include Nick Hexum (of Goodbye Friends of Heavenly obtaining info to contact the solo album which he plans to bring at least one or two when I 311), Scott Anderson (of finger Bodies is a melancholy concept artists, e-mailing, sending pack- record later this year and planning head out on tour. eleven), Anything goes Jimmy Gnecco (of Ours) album that is a breath of fresh air ages, etc... . Writing the actual the future of NWL, which, true to with a live NWL show; that's the and Dallas Green (of Alexisonfire). from mainstream radio rock. music took years. I lost a lot of the name, is looking good and has spirit of the concept," Victor "I'm not dependant on them being "Music is just going to keep dying sleep, often working from 3:ooam no end in sight. "You can definite- explained. there... . If an artist is available to if these awful bands keep making to 9:ooam. I ended up losing 60 ly expect an Act 2, followed by an Marco formerly Difelice, of perform, they will definitely join fabricated, meaningless music... . lbs. from stress and change of Act 3 and Act 4," Victor predicted. JamesBland?

n't even been given a chance yet. movies are based. Martin He's proven himself as an actor in Campbell, director of Goldeneye, films like Layer Cake and Enduring will take the helm for this one, and Love, but more importantly, the we'll even see Bond driving ALEXHAYTER Bond films could definitely do around in a token Aston Martin A&EEditor with a fresh start. DBS, rather than the Vanquish. Like Christopher Craignotbond.com wants to "How can a short, blond actor Nolan's Barman remove Daniel Craig's license to Begins, this one kill. Set to be the star of the next with a rough face of professional should change Bond film, Casino Royale, Craig everything for the was near the end of a list of poten- boxer and a penchant for playing better. tial Bonds including Hugh The internet Jackman, Clive Owen and Colin killers, cranks, cads and gigolos boycott itself seems Farrell. The usual response to to be more of a Daniel Craig's name is: 'Who?!' play a suave secret agent?" tongue-in-cheek "How can a short, blond actor joke than a serious with the rough face of a profes- Let's face it, Brosnan's films have demand for change, although a sional boxer and a penchant for gone downhill since Goldeneye, his fair bit of effort has gone into it. playing killers, cranks, cads and first as 007. Gone are the days of The site is adorned with the worst gigolos pull off the role of a tall, drama, discovery and emotion, to pictures of Craig that can lie dark, handsome and suave secret be replaced by 1 lollywood B-movie found; the gem of the site is 'Craig agent?" asks the site. They want action antics. Craig might not be lookalikes', a section comparing fans to boycott the film and put an the perfect man for the job, but is Craig to the likes of Kramer, Agent end to Craig's position in the star- at least a step in the right direction Cody Banks and The Riddler. It's ring role. for giving the spiraling series a goddamn funny. Craig's blond hair and blue eyes turnaround. The Bond films are as Craignotbond.com may com- are in stark contrast to Pierce stale as that loaf of Wonder bread plain about how Craig isn't much Brosnan's Irish brown, with the left out on your kitchen table since of a poster boy, but that still does- producers promising a return to September. Any true Bond fan n't change the fact that the Bond 'classic Connery' form for the should admit this. films desperately need a revival. In Bond series with Craig's arrival. Casino Royale will literally be the meantime we should reserve Still, the boycotters are having starting the series over again, our judgment and let the movie none of it. being the first of lan Fleming's speak for itself when it comes out SPOT THE DIFFERENCE - Craignotbond.com makes hilarious comparisons It seems a shame that Craig has- classic on Bond in year. stories which later the between Daniel Craig and various eccentric celebrities.