LIVIC Slimline Edition February 2015 LIVIC Page 2 LETTER FROM･THE EDITOR

Dear Reader,

First of all, an apology. As you will of course all be aware, there was no January edition of LIVIC. This is entirely due to things which aren’t my fault; helicopter crashes, alien abductions, the collapse of the global economy, the catastrophic Great American Beef Shortage… OK, so it’s mostly my fault. However, I do have exams and the beginning of 4th year project as an excuse.

Secondly, another apology. Since the middle of January the LIVIC offices have been overrun with mail from our readers, and my team and I haven’t been able to get through them all and answer them. Because of the lack of a January edition, the number of death threats, pleading notes and grovelling letters has increased exponentially to the point where the offices have had to be evacuated, fumigated and ceremonially burned. So if your letter was met with a stony silence, it’s because it went up in flames with the beautiful LIVIC office and my entire team. Its just me on my own now…

Thirdly, yet another apology. You may notice that THIS month’s edition is noticeably slimmed down, cutting a beautiful figure in its sleek and, dare I say it, sensual cover of the Cheesegrater. Work catches up with us all, and this has meant a little less content this month. Thankfully, I’m finally able to see the other side. Next month’s issue will be wonderful, as we have our Women’s Edition! Expect a feature-packed publication with articles from well-known faces in the department.

Best of luck to you all with coursework deadlines, life things, laundry and your upcoming trip to the Andes,

David LIVIC Page 3 THIS MONTH’S ISSUE

Post-mortem what now? Peter Nugent delves into the dark and twisted world of vintage cover bands in LIVIC’s first music column this year.

In-genie ring fill o’ saw fee Don’t look too far into this pun or you’ll go mad; it’s just a recap of the latest night of engineering philosophy (or should it have been drinks with alumni? YOU DECIDE!!)

CIVSOC The page that’s dedicated to Imperial’s best, most engaging, biggest, richest, most active, funnest, divinely ordained, most amazing society ever to have existed (objective measures used.)

Entertainment As ever, a full page of crosswords, sudokus, comics and free lollipops to keep you laughing (because then at least you won’t be crying… unless you’re laugh-crying, but just don’t.) LIVIC Page 4

MUSIC REVIEW Previous LIVIC editor Peter Nugent brings his unique writing to style to bear on vintage pop

Mid April last year, I read an article titled "4 song has it’s own theme. Anywhere from Shocking Psychological Dark Sides of Being to country to soul; even some of the Funny” on Cracked. I had to check what the most mind numbing pop songs of our time future holds for me because we all know I are totally transformed. The songs literally am bloody hilarious. Right? Right? Well my go through puberty. They mature, and they toaster thinks so anyway. At the end of the come out of the other side as works of art. article was a cover of ’s ‘Royals’. I’ll be You know the ones I’m talking about, the honest, I’m not the biggest fan of covers; ones they use in an unnamed prison off the there’s usually a few standout songs but it coast of Cuba to drive inmates insane by generally just becomes really soft playing them on loop for hours on end. I’m renditions of the originals, which is what looking at you Pitbull. I genuinely challenge floats some people’s boats, but not my you to not like Scott Bradlee’s version, the vessel. It takes a much bigger wave to move Youtube channel has so much variety it’s this bad boy. Applied Hydro anyone? No impossible to not find multiple songs you one? Nope. Alrighty then! So I click on the like. Also, when they name their old link, ignore the ads, take note of the hot albums Twist Is The New Twerk, Clubbing girls in my area and offers to extend my with Grandpa and Selfie On A genitals a few inches. Wait, what video was I Kodachrome you know you’re dealing with talking about? Oh Peter, you funny boy you! some cool kids. What’s Young Weezy Jeezy So this cover, the first thing you’re greeted Money Wayne on now, Carter XV? So the with is this 7 foot clown. Odd. I stick it out 17th of February rolls around and after I and I am blown away by a jazz-esque cover declined Dom’s begging for me to come to of Royals, featuring a 7 foot clown. Crazy. the Philosophy Night (because of my amazing chat, don’t kid yourself), I ventured off West to the not so distant O2 Empire in Shepherd’s Bush.

This was my very first concert, so this may be a bit biased. However, I have heard vicious rumours of a young Canadian chap who spits at his fans and turns up late to his shows, meaning that his little fans miss their Did I mention this 7 foot clown? What bedtimes, why do people even like this followed was a 10 month, still ongoing, guy? What a knob. So that’ll be my Postmodern Jukebox binge of music. reference point. Not. Bias. One. Bit. The Honestly, close that MATLAB script, show was emceed by Mykal Kilgore, known minimise OASYS and go and watch some of very well for his backing vocals in song their covers. They are all incredible, each LIVIC Page 5 such as Maps. Everything about the show this world, and she seemed to get a little bit was brilliant, from the emcee, to the small hotter every time she came out on stage. interludes between songs and even the There must have been some sorcery going commercials! Who knew Ariana Salavas, on backstage, and it leaked out to the stage known for Blank Space and No Diggity, was itself because her lungs seem to have nearly as funny as me? One of the best unlimited capacity. Seriously, watch Maps things about the show was the way each and go to 2:38 of the video. Listen to her vocalist could take over any song, a lot of vocals, they’re incredible and live they’re them are known for certain songs but they even better. PHWOAR. Did I mention how had no problem stepping into the shoes of hot she was? missing vocalists. That’s the beauty of Post Modern Jukebox, it’s huge. There’s core members, but there are a variety of instrumentalists (is that a word? (Yes. -Ed)) and vocalists, so it’s all very interchangeable. Which is why they can do so many tours, and you never quite know who you are going to get, but you will definitely be blown away, I had to borrow two pairs of socks as mine were blown off numerous times, I eventually gave up and went home barefoot. It was totally worth it. I don’t know what the standard at concerts is, but there was not a single backing track The highlight for me was the entertainment or lip syncing present here. I’m looking at on show, as I said, the emcee was excellent you, Mariah Carey. Everything was and the intermission between songs, which performed live. I told you, crazy talent. Not were short, but gave the performers a a single BMD on show though, so don’t feel moment to interact with the crowd were too bad. All in all, it was an electricfying quality as well. I may have mentioned this night, every single performer looked like already, but they were seriously that good. they wanted to be there and they all put on Casey Abrams, known for Stacey’s a real spectacle. All the hits were on show Mom (Heh) and I’m Not The Only One, was and they were even more impressive live, the best at this, he really knew how to play such as: , Maps, Stacey’s the crowd and even went around high- Mom, , All of fiving people, what a legend. In general it Me and Burn. This was their biggest show was such a spectacle, when you realise that to date, as demonstrated by the the youngest performer on tour was Kiah Tambourine Guy who broke his Tambourine Victoria, known for All of Me and Such because he Tambouried so hard. It went by Great Heights, is only 21 years old. Sure, so quickly, and there were so many acts that she can’t draw a BMD but it just shows how weren’t performing, so 10/10 would do it much talent was put together on one stage. again. Just kidding, I am. 22nd March at the My favourite performer had to be Morgan Greenwich O2. See you there. Did I James, known for Take Me To mention how awesome Church and Maps, her vocals are just out of was? LIVIC Page 6

NIGHT OF ENGINEERING PHILOSOPHY or ALUMNI NETWORKING EVENING? Which is it to be? David Maguire discusses the development of one of CivSoc’s most innovative events.

The Night of Engineering Philosophy has a short but illustrious history. Implemented last year as part of the previous committee’s sweeping reforms, it was conceived as an evening where the great minds of Imperial’s Civil Engineering department would meet over a glass (or two, or three) of wine and a whole lotta cheese. The issues discussed at these evenings have been incredibly wide ranging: from the benefits of individual projects or merits of a particular buildings to the role of education in engineering and what it means to be a ‘good’ engineer. It’s a chance for both students and lecturers to get together and really think about issues which we might otherwise deem too ‘big’ or too theoretical to consider.

The event was a resounding success, oversubscribed for students and lecturers alike. The format worked. The discussions would move smoothly and sinuously on from the suggested topics and into uncharted territories, with lecturers offering insight and experience to students eager both to learn and to contribute.

This most recent event adopted a different approach. Instead of departmental staff, CivSoc invited in alumni of the department to come and lead the discussions. With the usual accoutrements of wine and cheese provided by the Imperial catering service, the event certainly had a sheen of class. And sure enough, a great evening was had by all involved. But the vibe was definitely different. Although definitely not your typical evening of schmoozing, this was a chance to really find out, in an honest way, what industry experience was really like. And we jumped at the chance!

On our table alone, we had representatives in tunnelling, rail, wider transport and academia, of all nationalities and from many different companies. This meant an inexhaustible range of topics and a huge diversity of opinion and advice, all valuable, all good-natured. In my opinion, the evening was one of those rare occasions where we had a chance to network honestly - that is, without a particular goal in mind or something we wanted from the occasion. Everyone was there to think and to learn.

In my opinion, both formats are extremely valuable and succesful. However, they should be run in tandem, as different evenings! Why make them mutually exclusive? Civic is acting on this feedback and you should hopefully see more of these two events in the future. LIVIC Page 7 CIVSOC

Welcome to the amazing CivSoc page! Find info about upcoming events right here.

Pub quiz

That’s right: another amazing night of quizz-tastic fun and terrible, terrible team-name puns! Sign-up is now open, but places are going fast so get in there ASAP and win some kudos with your terrifying intellect (or get utterly thrashed by Dr. Wadee).

Elections There are several election-related events going on over the next few weeks, the most important of which is VOTING! Exercise your democratic right and choose who you want to entrust with next year’s social life. I have my fivourites, but sadly I have to remain impartial (so much journalistic integrefi).

On the 6th March, we have the CivSoc hustings, where our intrepid candidates will battle to the death in a purpose built arena filled with deadly traps and hidden dangers. The surviving tribute will win food, riches and glory for their home District, so come along and support your favourites! There will also be some kind of voucher giveaway to a randomly selected attendee, so it’s worth your while to come along.

Post-elections, we’ll be celebrating or commiserating with the Results Pub Crawl! Induce your new committee and make sure they are actually FUN by joining them in the Union and finishing the night in Spoooooons.

The future Ooooh, spooky! The future is HERE guys, and it’s gonna be so great. First up, the Grand Easter Egg hunt, on the 17th of March. The department will be drowning in Easter eggs and it will be up to you to find them before they hatch and a million tiny Jesus’ take over the world with their laser eyes! The true meaning of Easter. Looking even further ahead… don’t get too excited but OMG TOUR. One European city, two amazing coach loads of CivEngers, three musketeers, four nights in Bangkok, five golden rings to rule them all, ninety-nine luftballons… you get the picture, this is going to be one epic trip. Get psyched! LIVIC Page 8

DIVERSIONS & MERRIMENT [FOR USE IN LECTURES…?]

Across Down 1. To pierce through (9) 1. Reverence, devotion (9) 5. Well-timed (9) 2. A formal rebuke (9) 6. Slender in form (8) 3. Give in return (9) 8. Regular payment (7) 4. Ocular organs (4) 9. Misdeed (3) 7. Consumed (5) 10. To expressive a fondness (4) Those who understand binary, and those who don't. who understand binary, Those

An xkcd original; visit xkcd.com kinds of people. 10 different are There