SIGUN BEDIA COYLE

1941-2019

“Think where man’s glory begins and ends, And say my glory was I had such friends.”

- William Butler Yeats

Sigun Coyle - a true friend. How to begin, what to say?

How to follow in her footsteps, when she was everywhere? Kitchen, front desk, pastoral caring, lector, welcomer, usher, Junior Guild sales, knitting, and on and on.

I met Sigun in 2003 when I joined the Junior Guild board. Sigun had just salvaged the Guild after a difficult period and was making it the organization we have been proud of ever since, using fellowship and hard work to bring (knit) together a group of women and men, primarily parishioners, mostly American and French, to raise funds through sales and lunches to support charities.

For the Junior Guild's 90th anniversary, with Sigun as president and a Gala committee led by Dame Olivia de Havilland, we pulled off in the Cathedral nave an elegant formal dinner, remembered as the first such event at the Cathedral. Working with her on this and other projects makes me feel the void even more strongly.

Sigun led in so many ways, a welcoming face and smile at the front desk or the narthex, a powerful lector in three languages, founder of the knitters, “Les Tricoteuses”, always ready to lend a helping hand. I always knew I could ask for help with Altar Guild duties, sewing and mending chasubles, linens, and curtains, and preparing the Christmas tapers. Her agile fingers were never at rest at the front desk.

And a real friend, touchingly showing interest in my life and family, she fascinated us with her travel-logs, that made our mouths water with the details of the menus she and Joe shared each evening.

Much love, Dear Sigun,

- Harriet Rivière

It is a measure of her deep and widespread involvement at the Cathedral that following her death, every- where I looked, it seemed Sigun would be, should be, smiling back: from the front desk greeting station, from the kitchen, from the parish hall, from the pews. It seems impossible that we will continue to func- tion as smoothly without her. Well, we won’t, most likely. But she has taught us a thing or two, and we will strive to meet her high standards. Sigun was strength and organization, clarity and character. She did not leave us in doubt as to her opinions, or to which was the best way to proceed. At the same time, she was kindness and respect, generosity and gentleness. And so she leaves us with all of those great gifts, shared so widely with her beloved Cathedral family. I know I will have much company in missing her. - Ellen Hampton

What will the Junior Guild do without Sigun? Last February I brought some friends to the Cathedral to hear the concert of the Great American Songbook. Afterwards we jumped on the delicious food, which consisted of all sorts of tasty and varied amuse-bouches. When talking to Sigun during the reception, I learned that she had prepared everything! I'm a Friday Mission Lunch chef so I've learned a bit about cooking for a number of people, but this was a completely different feat.

I didn't know Sigun very well, but I will miss her warm presence. She was so involved at the Cathedral, her smiling face was everywhere – as a lector and usher, in Adult Forum, at the Junior Guild, at the front desk, and anywhere someone needed help (no doubt my list misses half of what she did). When I saw her, her eyes would light up and she'd give me a little hug, spreading a bit of joy even on those days when we didn't have time to say much beyond hello.

May Sigun rest in peace, and my sincere condolences go to Joe, who has lost a wonderful partner.

- Bess Gonglewski

It’s very hard to write about Sigun – because of sorrow, of course, because there are so very many memo- ries, and because she filled this Cathedral with her life and love and vitality. This last remains, even as we feel her absence acutely. Sigun and I had a lot of time together over the last six years. She was one of the very first people I met, since she was on the vestry and interviewed me for this position. The first party I was invited to here in Paris was given by Sigun and Joe. But I will write about the last major connection we had. Sigun was the driving force behind the accueillistes, the front-desk welcomers. As such, she not only served regularly at the desk, but she recruited volunteers, organized the schedules, and kept watch over her flock. So she was the one who noticed when Anthony Gavriloff did not turn up one Wednesday. The rest of us might not have paid attention; anything could have come up and he might have forgotten to call. But Sigun knew Anthony, and knew he didn’t miss his Wednesdays. She called and called and finally, on Thursday morning, went to his apartment. When there was no answer, she called the pompiers. She just didn’t give up and let it go. The pompiers and then the police found that Anthony had died in his apartment. I went over while she was waiting for the police, and the two of us stood in the hallway and talked and prayed for several hours. I just don’t know what would have happened without her. We had a funeral for Anthony here at the Cathedral, after Sigun had left for Santa Fe. She died before the funeral took place on July 11. We found that, despite all the rush of packing and leaving, she had left a donation for a reception at his funeral. That was so very typical of her. Her kindness stunned Anthony’s sister, who was already so grateful to her, and it left the rest of us in tears. Sigun will always be a part of the spirit of this Cathedral. May we all learn from her how to walk in love. - Lucinda Laird

I saw Sigun as a rock and pillar in our Cathedral community and beyond. One of my favorite Sigun memo- ries was during a luncheon at the Cathedral. Joanne and I accidentally overloaded the dumbwaiter while shuttling food to the parish hall where 50+ women were gathered. This was before the Together in Faith capi- tal campaign and the dumbwaiter was temperamental and the kitchen was still in the basement. It came crashing to the bottom, sending several plates shattering into servings of the main course. I was new to the Cathedral and horrified. Although I was new I had been there long enough to know, however, that it was as much the Cathedral's kitchen as it was Sigun's! We looked to her, expecting a "head chef" scolding but she was very gracious – knowing that we'd likely be short of food at the luncheon. We lightened the other por- tions, doubled up on bread and all was ok. She was the perfect embodiment of grace, firmness and love. I will miss her very much. I'm grateful that my son, Felix, has the quillow made by Sigun, Jill, Elizabeth and Mary Lou in the theme of My Father's Dragon as a wonderful family memento of a wonderful woman.

- Katherine Millen Worrell

Amitiés. In friendship.

I will forever associate this salutation with our sister and friend Sigun. She always signed her correspondence with this mark of affection. It impressed me from the first time I received a note from her, as being so very much who Sigun was: friend to all, welcomer in, champion of those on the outside looking in.

A true expression of faith, Christian love and human kindness, all wrapped up in one word that you always knew came from the depths of her heart. I am blessed to have crossed paths in this life with this beautiful person. May God bless our dear Sigun.

- Thomas Girty

We really were saddened to learn of Sigun's death, though our certainty that she is now joyfully in the Lord's presence does give us peace. Our hearts go out to Joe, who must bear her loss. Sigun was full of life, full of vigor, full of integrity. I wasn't able, during my years as Canon at the Cathedral, to see her and Joe as much as I would have wished, but our moments spent together – and our meals, so full of laughter and fine cuisine! – were precious for me and Victoria. Thank you, Sigun and Joe! And, when the time comes, may we all meet again in the fullness of God's Kingdom!

- George and Victoria Hobson

An image pops into my mind every time I think of Sigun, of the day she was going for a haircut just a few days before. She was walking down Otero street and I passed her in my truck. The image is of her sweet walk like a young girl, arms swinging, slightly pigeon-toed, face up to the sun, enthusiasm and delight. I hold onto that one. - Annie Lindberg

From the moment that I read the announcement that Sigun had died, her voice, both in English and French, has been with me almost constantly. Her face and physical presence is also very much in my thoughts. Her absence is deeply felt, and particularly on the 92 bus at Saint François-Xavier where we oc- casionally would run into each other.

Sigun was one of the first people I remember from the time I started to come to the Cathedral. It was a Christmas Eve and Sigun was one of the readers. Her voice and presence stood out, and over time, we came to know one another through speaking with her as she took her turn at the front desk. And she was never idle, her knitting needles constantly in motion as we chatted.

Even more than her voice or her physical presence, what stands out was her kindness. Whether sending me an e-mail message after my small part in Lucinda’s Passion Play, giving me kisses of bonjour on the bus, waving a little goodbye or hello from the information desk in entering or leaving the Cathedral, wel- coming people on a Sunday morning, reading at the lectern in French or English, or seeing her working in the kitchen, Sigun leaves a lasting impression of kindness, generosity, and love that is not only sorely missed, but genuinely felt.

- Timothy Thompson

Your smile. Radiant. Contagious. A blessing every time one could see it. Your smile, "comment ça va ma p'tite chérie?", a hug, and your fragrance. This was always how you would greet me, if we had seen each other recently, or not before a long time. This meant I was home. You were for me an out- standing example of steadiness, resilience, perseverance, and determination to do things for others, to help, to serve, to share, and to celebrate. It is an understatement to say that you loved babies. When you heard of the birth of my first nephew, you sponta- neously offered to knit socks for him. In June 2016, at the Foyer des Femmes with the Sisters of Charity, you were all love and joy, holding the babies in your arms. I keep you in my heart. I carry with me a piece of you. I love you. I miss you. I am humbled and grateful that I was fortunate enough to cross your path and walk a bit with you.

May you rest in peace, dearest Sigun, may you know God's peace, which the world cannot give, and rise in glory.

- Stéphanie Burette

I first met Sigun and Joe while traveling in the Holy Land with Nicholas and Dorothy Porter. Nicholas was at that time my priest at Trinity Church Southport CT. We frequently ate together and having learned that my friend Ginny Arndt and I loved to visit Paris from time to time, Sigun told us to be sure to con- tact her ahead of the next visit. That was the prelude to the rest of my many visits to Paris - a beautiful dinner with great conversation and a few other guests at the Coyles’ lovely home. Over the past years I have spent three or four weeks alone each winter in Paris. The Coyles’ hospitality – Sigun’s special din- ners, Joe’s jazz in the background, interesting people around the table – has been a key part of my vis- its. We became great friends, sharing times at the Cathedral and emails throughout each year. I saw them in Santa Fe a couple of times while visiting my daughter who had lived there. When I suddenly lost my 55-year-old son, I reached out to them for comfort which was so beautifully given. The news of Sigun’s sudden death broke my heart as it did so many others, several of whom became a lovely email chain of grief and consolation. The work of the Cathedral, the welcoming, the feeding, the support of so many communities there will never be the same. Sigun was a powerhouse of love, understanding and providing for all in so many ways. I treasure our friendship although it was separated by an ocean. I trust my friendship with Joe her beloved partner in every way will continue. Was there ever a more perfect couple?

- Jane Dean, Southport CT USA

A month after Joe’s grievous loss, I wrote to him: Not a day goes by without a mention, by Chad, Samuel and me, of dear Sigun, and a thought for you. It was, as many will have said, almost unbelievable that she should die so unexpectedly (at least for us), and so terribly quickly. She will continue to be remembered by count- less people because she was a powerhouse of active love: a shining example of what it means to be a Christian.

Yet another month has gone by, and I would like to add: Sigun was one of the most enthusiastic persons I have ever met. She put her intelligence, her feelings and her strength into the selfless service of so many others – even nonhuman creatures. We have had the privilege to be guests at her Thanksgiving table and witnessed the love and attention she gave to her plants, who responded by flower- ing over and over. Her presence brought warmth and life. She will be missed more than we can say.

- Anne Marie Reijnen

Sigun was the first person at the Cathedral who greeted me by my name. She made me feel welcome and part of the American Cathedral family. What a difference a name makes! - Carol Bossonney

Sigun recounted this anecdote about working at the front desk: “I was 'de service' on St. Valentine's Day in the afternoon. A lovely couple came in. I gave my usual 'Spiel' of our beautiful brochure, explaining it, and asking them to return it to me in case they didn't want to keep it. We talked for quite a while: I always ask Americans where they come from; this couple came from Alabama and was just visiting Paris. They wanted to know why I was in Paris. They spent a long time inside the Cathedral. When they came out, they started whispering together, then took a rose out of their bag. When returning the brochure to me, they gave me the rose and wished me Happy Valentine's Day. They made my day.” - Alex Brassert

OK….every single time I saw Sigun she seemed to light up and then give me a really strong, long hug and at that moment I felt so loved, so appreciated, it really brightened up my day.

- Betsy Andronikos

As a member of the Junior Guild, although a sporadic visitor, I just want to recall her extreme warmth and goodwill.

Although I didn’t see her often, she always opened her arms with affection and generosity. She was love and dedication in person. Faith in action.

For some reasons, some persons, even barely met, stay in one’s memory.

- Charles Langhendries

Sigun was an inspiration to all who knew her. We first met at a Junior Guild luncheon when I compli- mented her on the delicious meal she had prepared with her team. Full of smiles and openness, she was someone I wanted to know better. The next month I went into the kitchen to see if I could help and right away she said, “Go wash your hands!” Then she had me follow the lead of another woman making one of the favorite apéro items. I began coming early after that and before long was a regular member of her team, along with Christiane Percie de Sert, Christiane Clémencin, Anita Cesbron, Katrina Neal-Hamel and other active Junior Guild members. She always offered cooking classes in her home through the Christmas Sale where I learned to make some fabulous dishes. Before long, she encouraged me to become a board member, first as secretary and later as treasurer, and then when she was not coming back to Paris until January one year, she asked me to take over the chair- manship of the Christmas Fair. What a challenge that was! But so many pitched in to help that we raised a respectable result for our charities. Sigun was indefatigable, visiting possible donors to the Silent Auction in person two or three times, baking huge amounts for the bake sale, pricing all the items, rounding up volunteers to sort, place, and sell. Even more, she cooked an annual dinner for our Helping Hands moth- ers and children for Christmas, gave dinner parties at her home for the Cathedral staff and for celebra- tions of many parishioners, and last year alone she cooked Thanksgiving dinner for 88 people at the Ca- thedral, put together food for all the convocation delegates the day before organizing more food for 500 at the consecration of our new bishop as well as for four Junior Guild meetings. She read lessons in Eng- lish and French, knitted mittens and scarves for our charities with her bilingual group of “Tricoteuses”, visited sick and elderly parishioners, helped cook for the annual Christmas lunch at Enfants du Monde, one of our charities, led the welcome desk volunteers, corrected our French (having been a long-time professional teacher of French), and ALWAYS, ALWAYS greeted us with that great smile and “Hello, my darling” and a hug. What will we do without our beloved Sigun? We must honor her by imitating her generosity, kindness, good cheer, hard work and devotion to others so that her spirit will live on in this community she loved so much. - Meredith Salisbury

Floyd and I were truly shocked to hear about Sigun's sudden death. I remember Sigun's sweet smile, her dedication to the Cathedral, her many culinary skills and her devotion to help in all aspects of church activities. With heartfelt sympathy, - Floyd and Sandy Emerson

What fun Neil and I have had looking through our photos and reliving wonderful memories of good times with Sigun over the years.

We often remember her in relation to food – all the delicious meals she cooked for us at her and Joe's home, in our home (we always tried to out-bid everyone at the Junior Guild fair to win a meal cooked by Sigun served in our own house) – and of course at the Cathedral, most recently in April at the Bishop's installation. When Jonathan Huyck, former Canon, wrote in Trinité that one of the things he would miss most about Paris was Sigun's cooking, we knew just what he meant. Living here in the UK now we often eat sticky toffee pudding but none is as good as Sigun's, which she turned out en masse.

Other beneficiaries of Sigun's talent and drive were all of us who received some of the bounty of her prolific needlework. She gave me a beautiful handmade afghan to thank me for some small favor, and hundreds of children received hand-knit caps, gloves, and socks from Sigun and the members of the Tricoteuses group she started at the Cathedral.

Sigun's great curiosity and energy, which led her to be such an accomplished cook and needleworker, was apparent also when we travelled together, which we had the pleasure of doing many times. Always inter- ested in the lives of the people we met, in the history, and of course in the food, she was a perfect travel companion – and she was always on the bus on time!

It is hard and sad for us to think that Sigun, that seemingly unstoppable force of positive energy and love, is gone, but we are glad to have known her and to be able to share memories of her with the many others she touched in her remarkable life.

- Nancy Janin

While Zachary and I have many personal memories, Sigun was to all of us in the Cathedral community a call to be a better self, a reminder to make a better effort, to “show up,” to be counted on, a symbol of radical hospitality and boundless outreach in countless ways.

From legendary Junior Guild luncheons, Book, Begonia and Bake Sales to raise funds and awareness for worthwhile charities, to delicious intimate dinners whipped up with fascinating guests, there never seemed to be a moment when she wasn’t fully engaged.

As the friendly face behind the Welcome Desk, she could always dispense advice and keep her finger on the pulse of the Cathedal community’s heartbeat. She often greeted my comings and goings with the latest French phrase that would become my lesson for the day. My most re- cent and fond memory was when Sigun took our 8-year-old granddaughter under her wing on Palm Sunday when both her grandparents were otherwise occupied with choir and clergy du- ties. We hadn’t planned that she would be by herself. But Sigun saw an opportunity and put Chiara to work passing out bulletins and palm branches, and then guided her into the Palm Sunday procession as if she had been around forever. In her wise way, Sigun made this dear child feel like she had played a major part in a dramatic service. It is a significant reason that Chiara has such great affection for the Cathedral.

- Donna Fleetwood

My aunt Sigun was a second mother to me for over 50 years, and as much as I wish I could claim that as my own special declaration, there are many of us. So many people feel that they had that special bond with her because they ac- tually did. She had enough love to go around. When she shone her light on you it felt like you were the only one. And more than once I imagine you got a little jealous when you realized you weren’t. She touched so many lives.

She really saw people. She also inspired people with an endless list of skills and talents that she shared tirelessly with everyone around her. Her contribu- tion to our lives will live on along with the memory of her generous spirit. Sigun made you want to be a better person. She made you want to challenge and expand yourself. She just made you want to be more loving. What a gift.

- Laura Coyle (niece)

It was 54 years this summer since Sigun met Joe at my wedding. Joe and my husband were the best of friends and Sigun was Jim’s and my newest friend. It is wonderful to have intro- duced her to the love of her life, as well as to have had such a generous good heart in my own. So many images flood my memory. One that I especially like is of her and their son spending school vacation time on the island of Hydra where Alex loved to swim. Sigun told me that he would spend many carefree hours enjoying the cool waters of the Aegean. Mean- while, she undoubtedly was checking out the day’s catch, which she would prepare for their dinner. Sigun never lost her enthusiasm for life. It is sad without her, but I have learned that a person’s presence, especially one as strong as our friend’s, remains with us. - Audrey Shields

When I first met Sigun, I was helping with the Mission lunch. I said I was looking for something more I could do in the Church, and she said " Oh, do join the Junior Guild". And so I did, and she became very dear to me. She made my heart happy.

- Mary Alice Kirk

In the spring of 1999, I returned for my second tour at the Cathedral and discovered a newly ar- rived Sigun ensconced in the front door welcome station. In our exchange, she asked where I was going. I replied that I would be attending a meeting of the Junior Guild. “What’s that?”, she asked. I explained and she said, “Gee, that sounds interesting.” At the next meeting, she popped in. What a lucky stroke for all of us!

- Gail Worth, Former Junior Guild President

Sigun, you were like a ray of sunshine. Always a broad smile, a huge hug, a hearty laugh. So much energy and hard work, cooking, organising, caring, visiting, thinking of others, putting your heart and soul into everything you did. We will miss you and will try to keep your memory alive by emulating you and following your example. Thank you for all the ways you touched our lives and enriched our souls. Thank you for all that you gave to our Cathedral community.

Rest in peace dear Friend.

Sue and Bob Grieg

Sigun accomplished many amazing cooking feats in her lifetime, but the most incredible, in my opinion, was making a full dinner for 130 people for 1,040 euros. Yes, you read correctly. That's eight euros a person. The occasion was an important one: The Cathedral hosted the annual convention of the Convocation in 2015. People poured into Paris from all over Europe, plus some from the U.S. The highlight of the three- day meeting was the Bishop's Dinner on Friday. Typically, this is held in a restaurant. But with our beautiful space and plentiful volunteers, we decided to host it ourselves. We knew we had a secret weapon: Sigun. The menu she chose was boeuf bourguignon and scalloped potatoes. Shopping began weeks in advance. Cooking began days in advance. Everyone was under Sigun's command – or you weren't allowed into the kitchen. In typical commander style she organized the cooks, the servers and the entire dinner. She decided what they would wear, where the serving stations would be, how the aperitif would be done, how the food would be served. The beef – beef cheeks, actually – cooked gently for hours. And when the time came, attendees gobbled it up and there were many comments about how wonderful it was. - Anne Swardson

With Sigun, no words are necessary, every picture tells a story, hands and hugs say it all; she was the first one to teach me the French word ‘chaleureuse’; I love her and miss her beyond all words. - Mary Haddad

I recall feeling so honored to have been on the board of the Junior Guild when Sigun was President, as her organizational skills and immense generosity of spirit brought out the best in all of us! During the BBQ preparations in the parish kitchen, I was vividly reminded of the amazing dishes, Thanksgivings and appetizers prepared by Chef Sigun – I miss her amazing and welcoming smile!

- Linette Quintana

Some of us have a wonderful ability to sense what is happening around us...and then join in. I was listen- ing intently to a sermon and fiddling with my hearing aids when one of the batteries failed. This was not a catastrophe, but it was annoying. And it was preventing me from hearing the message. Before I could even examine my hearing aid, a hand materialized in front of me holding a new battery. This was Sigun in action. Low key. Present. Helpful. A small step. One of many Sigun's actions. She was a delight, street smart and present both here, in Paris, and in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

- Bill Gahr

Last time I saw Sigun and Joe in Sante Fe in September 2018 I cried when we left. Laura turned to me and asked “Why are you so upset to leave?” I said it was so won- derfully overwhelming to feel accepted as part of the family. That’s how Sigun made you feel, whether family, friend or stranger, she made everyone feel like they be- longed. And what a place to belong!!! She had so many fabulous things to share with her clan: her amazingly delicious and yummy concoctions, her beautiful pottery, her knitted creations of all shapes and sizes, her pure elbow grease to make sure you were fully taken care of from the moment you entered her home! And even if you didn’t know Sigun well or didn’t get to experience her many talents, the one thing that you couldn’t miss was her radiating love and care which she shone upon everyone she en- countered.

- Zoe Jeffery (niece-in-law)

Sigun était une personne d'une grande bonté, une femme travailleuse, toujours souriante, aimable, atten- tionnée, serviable, charitable et pour moi comme une seconde mère. Elle demandait toujours de mes nou- velles et de celles des garçons et me racontait toujours comment se sont passées ses journées. Elle avait un grand cœur de maman. Elle travaillait beaucoup, elle se donnait énormément pour les autres et surtout à la Cathédrale, par exemple pendant chaque début d'année se tenait un repas annuel à la Cathédrale orga- nisé par Sigun et elle se tenait partout jusqu'aux fourneaux, c'était également une excellente cuisinière. Elle était d'une inspirante générosité et chaque année elle offrait un cadeau à mes enfants. Ma chère Sigun, tu laisses derrière toi un très grand vide. Ta disparition a été pour moi comme un coup de tonnerre. Je ne peux raconter toutes les choses merveilleuses que tu as fait à ma famille et à moi car ce serait trop long mais sache que tu resteras dans nos coeurs à jamais. Maman Sigun, nous t'aimons très fort. Repose en paix.

- La famille Ngako

I have no physical photographs to share here, but Sigun did leave many “snapshots” in my mind’s eye. Here are a few: The area in which we worked most closely was lectoring. Sigun was the kind of lector heads of ministries dream of: she was always eager and willing to read, often available at awkward dates and times, could read well in three languages, and – most importantly – was obsessed with good preparation. This was apparent in the way she read. When Olivia de Havilland published an interview describing her method for preparing the lessons she read, including mark-ups of the text with everything from intonation shifts to stresses or breathing pauses, Sigun was thrilled. She once showed me how she had done the same – and encouraged me to promote the method at our lectors’ work- shops. Sigun had a touch of perfectionism, which I took to be a Germanic feminine trait (in this she reminded me of my grandmother). She could worry about details that others might not notice, but since she considered them important, they had to be dealt with. One year, I had asked her to prepare a few sentences in German for a multilingual Pentecost reading; she showed up at the rehearsal with two German translations which were very different, and required an opinion on which one should be used. Getting the reading right was fundamental. Most im- portantly, her love of the Word was obvious, and she adored seeing new, young lectors take up the challenge of reading. More than once, when she found herself scheduled to read with one of the youth lectors, she would shoot off an e-mail to me to say, “Oh, lucky me, I get to read with so-and-so !” This was a precious image to me: sharing the practice of reading Scripture aloud across the generations. I benefited in other ways from Sigun’s commitment to the Cathedral and its people. She was a doer and a maker – she was such a pillar of events like Thanksgiving or Cathedral bake sales that it occasionally seemed like an apron was part of her church attire. I remember someone who had set up a volunteer activity at the Cathedral but had little interest in managing it once it was up and running. One day I learned that Sigun had taken it over – and of course it was thriving. As the saying goes, if you want something done, give it to a busy woman. If we wanted it done well, we gave it to Sigun. Sigun was also naturally welcoming, and I loved walking into the Cathedral when she was ushering – her smile (a real smile, starting from her shining eyes) warmly welcomed anyone who entered the Cathedral space, and she would gladly interrupt the smooth distribution of bulletins to give someone a serious hug when necessary. I remember in particular how she reached out to a friend I was trying to bring into the Cathedral family and who was a little nervous about our bustling environment – for Sigun it was the obvious thing to do. Finally, Sigun had a playful side – I interpreted it as playfulness, and it was a source of inspiration for me. Images come to mind of Sigun’s fashion flair: strolling around in a gorgeous pair of real western cowboy boots, with assorted turquoise jewelry, or sporting her elegant suits and ties. Watching Sigun and her wardrobe brought back memories of my favorite clothes when I was a teenager. Another impish image: Sigun gently steering Joe out of the room at the end of a Sunday Forum, all the while waving good-bye to everyone with her bright-eyed smile, like a child slipping away with an accomplice to go exploring. I admired Sigun for her amazing combination of qualities: seriousness, commitment to the task well done, devotion to her Cathedral family, and the ability to nurture a playful part of herself that made her so vibrantly alive.

- Jocelyn Phelps

Words tumble from my heart onto my keyboard. But only a few. I am a writer, yet I can’t write this. Even for Sigun. Even in memoriam. Not enough space. Not enough time. And too much sorrow. Tears run down my cheeks, blurring both eyes and mind, till, drained, I stop trying, my head in my arms.

Then, suddenly I hear her voice. The best home cook I have ever known is telling me the story of a feast she cooked for the angels. Though filled with wonder, I don’t question what she is saying. Sigun, after all, has recounted the stories of many meals. But the food historian in me craves details. Was it manna, the bread of angels, that she served? Or the milk, butter, hearth cakes, and veal that Abraham gave his angelic visitors? (Genesis 18:2-8). Or did she discover a food on high more fit for spirit than body? (I hope for the latter. Her pleasure at finding new dishes may not have equaled Brillat Savarin’s who thought the discovery of a new dish more important than the discovery of a new star. But her delight in coming on one was great.) However, just as I am about to ask for specifics, Sigun changes the subject. Now it is Eleanor of Aquitaine, or as she insisted I spell it, Aliénor. And, somehow, behind Sigun’s words about that extraordinary queen, I hear the strains of Can vei la lauzeta mover, a 12th century troubadour song from the period of her reign. Then a new topic again, this time the singular Jean Vanier, founder of L’Arche, his vision, communities of virtue and faith, the beatitude of love.

Food, Aliénor, Vanier, all among “our” subjects. And, increasingly, I feel all of her, not just her voice, is close by. I lift my head and she is there, looking even now as though she had just stepped out of a bandbox. How happy I am to see that. And how even more happy to see the light that filled her eyes still shining as it did when her adored Joe entered the room. Or when she was watching the live candles burn on her Christmas tree in New York. Or was talking about her much-loved Paris. Or walking through the ceramics studio she frequented in Santa Fe to show her lovely work and, most important, share her plans to make plates for others.

For others. Always for others. Ever generous. Ever giving. And with her talents always employed for good. Images of the baby blankets, the bereavement afghans, the booties for La Maison du Bébé, the quilt for the wounded soldier flash before me, as do her creations for Helping Hand, the Sisters of Charity, Love in a Box, many produced with Les Tricoteuses of the American Cathedral. Of course, I, recollect, too, how that capacity to love affected her relationships and think of the endless devotion she showed to friends.

Strengthened, I return to writing, and realize that her visit, now over, was also made in that spirit. Marvelously, she came to console me for her own death. And to assure me that even absent, she is present. Thank you, dear Sigunaki.

- Cara Da Silva

My very favorite memory of Sigun is the moment she would see someone she knew and loved, the way her face lit up, the outstretched arms, the gros bisous, the fierce hug. Working with her in the kitchen was always a delight – her pragmatism, her effortless (to an outsider) competence, her inventiveness. This was never more apparent than with the bishop's consecration weekend; she and I worked together for almost six months prepping for that, with multiple emails every day batting ideas back and forth, and regular testing of her food ideas, culminating in the delicious menu she and her team prepared. I was delighted to be able to back her up logistically, freeing her to cre- ate.

From the moment I met her and Joe after one of the first LAGV gala concerts, the two of them were an inspiration to me, as I'm sure they were to others, on how to live: curiosity, a thirst for knowledge, an appreciation for the arts, and above all, a deep- seated desire to give back to the community for all the blessings one receives. I learned a long time ago that someone lives as long as they are remembered, and their legacy continues. I miss Sigun's hugs and her laughs and her wisdom; but I find comfort in what she taught me and so many others: love.

- Mark Carroll

I remember the day you came to me and told me that you enjoyed my salmon-avocado roll. You asked me for the recipe. I was honored to be able to share it with you.

You made it at one of our events and it tasted better than mine. You explained that it was because you added dill.

What a difference one ingredient made. And now I will always have "our recipe.” I'm calling it 'Sigunrina roll'. And I will always think of you each time I make them.

I miss working with you. Thank you for teaching me so much in the kitchen.

My son, Neal, will miss your date cake. It's the best he's ever had.

- Katrina Neal-Hamel

Sigun was the epitome of openness, kindness, and radical hospitality and the essence of her being will be with us for years to come. I could give so many examples of her organizational, cooking, generosity and hosting abilities offered to those she knew, both friends and individuals in need, and small to very large groups of 100!!! One of these groups was the Junior Guild project Helping Hand sponsored by Judith and Jean Lanier. Every January for the last 9 years or so, Sigun would gather us together for one of her delicious meals where we distributed gifts from Love-in-the-Box, mainly prepared by Sigun! Also for many years she headed the Junior Guild Christmas Sale and introduced the Silent Auction which brought in about half of the proceeds as well as donated her cooking lessons in her home, all to benefit the Junior Guild charities mainly for women and children in need.

So much more could be written, and I am confident that it will be by many others.

- Kate Thweatt

Sigun – there are not enough uplifting adjectives to describe her. She was a rock for Joe and the Ameri- can Cathedral, unfailing in her desire to contribute to her community and generously shared her dazzling smile and spirit with all. She was courageous, doted with a robust character and infectious good humor. Her hospitality was legendary, as well as her cooking and joie de vivre. She was an inspiration for all of us, a model for our Christian faith. We will all miss Sigun so, yet her spirit will remain with us forever. God blessed Sigun, and through Sigun, God blessed us. - Elizabeth (Beth) and François Puton

Sigun's life was a fulfillment of Jesus's commandment to "Love one another". With her unconditional love, her outrageous hospitality, her smile of compassion and joy and acceptance which invited friendship and trust, she never knew a stranger. She was love and it radiated from her like the sun.

She was God's messenger here on earth, His angel of mercy and grace and love.

- Judith Lanier

Sigun was an intensely vital person. She was creative and enthusiastic; I'm thinking about her cooking, her handwork, her devotion to helping people. I see her in the kitchen, so enthusiastic about cooking, which never really inspired me. But she was also enthusiastic about the people who helped her there (rarely me), affirming what they were doing.

She was generous with her time and immense talents. A natural leader, she played a significant role in the Junior Guild. I remember her from the time she, Nat, and I, Sylvie Botétémé, and sometimes other peo- ple were visiting Edwige Grabowski. Although essentially a highly intelligent person with many interests, as she neared the end of her life, especially when she had to leave her apartment for an institutional set- ting, Edwige could be difficult. Sigun visited her and took responsibility for her with the authorities with very little gratitude from Edwige. Sigun never faltered, her energy never seemed to desert her.

And she was so much fun! She had close friends everywhere, it seemed. I miss her, even though I last saw her a couple of summers ago for a brunch.

- Margaret Harrison

Sigun was a formidable, conscientious cook, someone – I could tell – who paid great attention to detail. And so it was with considerable trepidation that we invited her and Joe to our place in Paris in April of 2009 (I believe) to celebrate Edwige's 90th birthday. I was doing the cooking, notably a slow-cooked, highly seasoned leg of lamb according to a recipe from Greek friends. It is a dish that when it is good, it can be VERY VERY good. When things go wrong, when the juices escape and the meat dries out, it can be a disaster. On this particular afternoon, knowing Sigun would be in attendance, I for once paid great attention to detail in the seasoning and timing and the net result was met with great acclaim. Of course, one never knows if compliments in such circumstances are sincere or not.

The following day, however, there came an e-mail from Sigun, thanking us for the meal and – to my astonished relief – a request for the recipe! As an amateur chef, I had arrived!

She was a force of nature – a strong woman.

- Nat Harrison

Besides her welcoming friendliness and good cooking, Sigun’s European accent and manner always re- minded me that the American Cathedral is an international Cathedral. - Cynthia Wentworth

Here are some thoughts of Sigun: I miss her and I will still look for her familiar and friendly face at the Cathedral. I remember her assertive and warm tone. No-nonsense Sigun. What an excellent cook! I re- member the first LGBT dinner I attended: she made people she cooked for feel at home at the Cathedral. Love on a plate! Some people just affect our lives subtly but surely and my throat tightens at the thought I won't see her again. She had knitted an orange and purple blanket for the birth of my daughter at the end of last year: a small part of Sigun stays with us that way. She was generous with her time, talent, lead- ership skills, energy and warmth. - Anne Dumazert

Martin Prechtel, in his book, The Smell of Rain on Dust, says “grief is praise because it is the natural way love honors what it misses.”

Our memories and recollections are our praise.

I loved Sigun – as so many of us do. So difficult to use the past tense with regard to Sigun, with regard to a woman of such force and vitality who was filled with what seemed to be inexhaustible energy.

She was singular in her care of Joe, of the small families she created and the communities she nourished. I was part of a small community, the Trinity community. I was welcomed into a group that dined at her home and was fed – with the most extraordinary meals and rich conversation.

We have suffered a loss but we have been given much by her presence, by her love, dedication and devo- tion.

Her spirit is eternal.

- Carol Perry

Just as in the gospel there is the worker of the last hour so here is a witness of the last hour since my meeting with Sigun only took place at Thanksgiving 2018 when I was enlisted to assist with the carving of the traditional turkey at the Cathedral lunch. This was a great opportunity to establish communication and a link with Sigun and to share our mutual passion for food, discussing her awesome shredded brus- sels-sprout recipe. But even more important, several months later one Sunday morning early 2019 on en- tering the Cathedral I was greeted by Sigun whose deepest regard & warmest embrace will remain a last- ing memory of someone very special who had clearly understood & embraced the great commandment of her Lord and Master, that we love one another as He loved us. May she rest in peace in the love of Christ. - Chris Barnes

Three things stand out to me about Sigun – her voice, her enthusiasm and her touch. Her distinct voice could be heard from quite a long distance, although your reply needed to be equally as loud otherwise she would not hear you reply and ask you the same question with more emphasis.

Sigun was a great organizer – projects, kitchens, gift boxes, etc. All of these things were visible and known at the Cathedral. If you put Sigun in charge, it would get done. What impressed me more, however, is how she delicately wove communities together, just like the beautiful baby booties made by the Tricoteuses. She brought unlikely people together, people who were just looking for a few friends or a little bit of laughter to break up their time spent alone, or in grief.

She had a physical enthusiasm for the people and causes she really cared about. I remember her jumping up and down in the chapel when she found a beautiful doll in one of the LoveBoxes that she wanted to put in one her special boxes for the Helping Hands kids.

She always greeted me with such warmth and sincerity. No matter what kind of mood I was in, a hug and a kiss from Sigun would make me feel so special. Even the glass booth of the welcome desk could not keep her away – she would reach through that window and touch and squeeze my forearm, just to make sure I got a big dose of Sigun-love before running off to the next thing.

Ma cherié you will be so missed.

- Judy Nicault

I don’t remember when or where I first met Sigun, but I am sure I was a little intimidated. Sigun’s warm, big heart could be betrayed by a stiff exterior. Once you got to know her it was easy to see she was a product of her German upbringing and she was just very sure of herself. Never aggressive, she firmly let you know ‘how it was.’ I had the good fortune of getting to spend a lot of time with her, learn so much from her, and be on the receiving end of a true love and caring. Whether I ran into her when she was volunteering at the front desk in the narthex or sat in a meeting with her or was in the kitchen, she had so much to impart. I had known Sigun for quite some time when several of us decided to make a quilt for Katherine and Philip’s baby. The design involved embroidered animals (à la My Father’s Dragon, idea by Mary Lou) and Sigun had already completed a stunning dragon before we could get very far with our lion and monkey and cat etc. She had to bow out of one of our quilting sessions and was so apologetic, she invited us to her apartment to make up for it, she felt badly about missing our meeting. She offered to share a few tips because she had a little experience. It turned out she had drawers full of gorgeous embroidered tablecloths, runners, and napkins that she made by hand. I knew she was a whiz with a knitting needle and for a crafter who had trouble holding a knitting needle, much less making a stitch, I was always blown away by the bevy of hats she would deliver to Love in a Box each December. I so admired her handwork, whether with crafts, cooking, or decor as well as her passion for learning new skills. She wrote me from Santa Fe last summer that she was starting a pottery class. She was nothing if not inspiring. There are so many things I have learned from Sigun, not the least of which is how to economize (and help the planet) in the kitchen. We are all familiar with her immense culinary skills, but my favorite memory of her in the kitchen was re-using paper towels. It started in the old kitchen and we were prepping for a Junior Guild lunch the following day. I must have been drying washed and scrubbed potatoes (for her famous gratin) and all the torchons were wet so she had me use paper towels and then hang them to dry over the backs of the chairs. I am reusing paper towels to this day. Sigun pulled out all the stops when cooking – whether chez Coyle or at the Cathedral – and I know there are many stories about those glorious meals. I have an image of her in a top hat, except it’s a toque, pulling a rabbit out of a hat, as she seemingly did for Junior Guild galas, going-away dinners from that old basement kitchen, or for the Convocation Convention Bishop’s dinner in 2015. That was the time she made dinner, including three different hors d’oeuvres at the drinks table, six types of handmade canapés, and a three-course meal including her signature date toffee cake for 130 people and, wait for it… spent 8 euros a person. Definitely a magician. She hosted a gorgeous gourmet going-away dinner for Rick and me in 2016. I treasure the memories of that evening along with those of the breakfast she offered me on my only visit back to Paris since. She dropped everything when finding out I was in town and put out a lavish spread. I feel so fortunate to have had those moments with Sigun. I remember Sigun as a masterful woman: a force of talent, generosity, leadership, and love. I am privileged to have known her and called her my friend. When I think of her cupping my face in a greeting, I get tears in my eyes, and it’s a memory I will never forget. Bises, ma chère Sigun - Betsi Dwyer

Sigun’s smile and warmth and her talent for “crowd cooking” brought happiness to one and all. Sigun shared one of her favorite recipes with me which you will love too. Sigun’s APPLE CAKE - I always call it my 4-3-2-1 cake:

4 eggs 3 cups of flour 3 tsp of baking powder 2 cups of sugar (I actually put in 1-1/2 cups) 1 cup of oil (grape seed, peanut, anything but olive oil) 1/2 cup of orange juice and peel of one large orange thinly sliced (large orange = 1/2 cup juice) 4 apples peeled and sliced 1/2 jar of apricot jam 1/2 cup of raisins 1/4 cup of chopped walnuts 3 Tbs sugar 1/2 tsp of cinnamon

Grease 3 loaf pans or a round cake pan with a bit of oil or butter. Put flour, sugar, pinch of salt, baking powder, orange peel, eggs, orange juice, oil in a large bowl stir with a wooden spoon until well blended. Set aside.

Keep chopped nuts, raisins, and apricot jam separate. Peel and slice apples, toss slices with the 3 Tbs sugar and cinnamon in another bowl.

Put half the dough into the pan(s), add the apple slices, spread apricot jam over slices, scatter the raisins over slices and the walnuts, cover with rest of dough.

Bake in preheated oven for about an hour, checking after about 3/4 of an hour: the top should be deep golden brown.

Wait until cool to unmold.

The original recipe didn't call for: orange peel, apricot jam, raisins and nuts.

The cake keeps for days, well wrapped. I will triple the recipe on Thursday, bake it in one of the Cathedral's large trays, and wrap it up tightly for Saturday evening.

- Chilla Heuser- Rousselle

From our first contact, Sigun spotted a need and instantly offered her help. Last year, my brother An- thony, also a fellow member and volunteer at the American Cathedral, had surgery and was in the hospi- tal. Since he had no family in France, Sigun offered to check in on him and provide me with regular up- dates on how he was doing. Her visits were a great source of comfort and joy for Anthony, and they surely contributed greatly to his quick recovery.

Sigun and I never met in person but our fates were forever bound in the spring of 2019 when Anthony did not show up for his shift at the cathedral. Anthony was known to be very reliable, and when Sigun heard about his absence, she took it upon herself to make the trip to his apartment to see if he needed assistance. Thanks to her, Anthony was found. He had died peacefully in his beloved home, shortly before. And thanks to her quick reaction, by calling the Cathedral, Dean Lucinda Laird, was able to see and bless Anthony. No words can begin to express how grateful my family and I are to Sigun for her courageous act.

The Cathedral and Sigun offered us such kindness and support in those difficult weeks after Anthony's passing. Sigun reached out to me several times by phone and email, even on her last day in Paris, while she was in the middle of her packing for her big U.S. trip she wanted us to know how sorry she was that she could not attend Anthony’s memorial service. Later, I found out that she had generously contributed to Anthony's memorial service which took place in July. Sigun had a most warmhearted, kind and com- forting way of reaching out, with which she took away some of the sharpness out of the pain. May the many shared good memories and the joys which Sigun gave to those near and far revive hope during these difficult moments.

- Lillian Sperling, Lisa Sperling and Dave Ross

From the very first moment that I met Sigun, I knew we were going to be friends. Sigun’s smile was so welcoming. Very quickly, one became aware of her many qualities. Sigun was kind, generous, loving, giving, fun, and more. She always showed so much enthusiasm with her eyes lighting up at the same time.

I enjoyed working with Sigun on the many fairs and events the Junior Guild held. We would spend hours together pricing given items and setting up. These last years, Sigun was entirely responsible for soliciting the many restaurants which of- fered meals for our silent auction table. She contacted Petrusse for their lovely scarves, Guerlain for beauty products, wines from different sources, a shop for a smoked salmon, just to mention a few. She never counted her hours. How can one not be influenced by such energy! I always signed up for her cooking class each year. I wouldn’t miss one when they were scheduled.

The kitchen: Sigun was comfortable making meals for an incredible number of people. I was always in awe of her ability to produce such delicious meals. Of course, she had helpers, but she was the “head of the orchestra.” Sigun also oversaw numerous meals for the Cathedral, again, her tireless willingness to help.

Sigun started the Wednesday knitting group, which has grown to a rather large number of participants. My daughter Eva sadly lost her third child, a son named Felix, just after he was born in 2016. Sigun, together with the knitting group, made a beautiful blanket for Eva to wrap herself in. Needless to say, it was VERY appreciated by Eva and really warmed her heart. Eva waited and over time, decided to have another baby. She gave birth to a little girl, Pia, in April 2018. Sigun once again presented Eva with a lovely gift from the group: a pair of booties with two big pink pompons! Eva will never part with them! Again, Sigun simply being her thoughtful, loving, caring self. As Eva’s mother, it meant a lot to me as well.

It seems unfair that Sigun has left us but she has reunited with her loving son. She will be sorely missed by all who have known her. Sigun’s spirit remains with us and I know she is looking down upon all of us now. She will always be in my heart and thoughts as that very special person I was privileged to know.

- Ingrid Bekkelund Leygonie

Très chère Sigun, Te voilà partie, j'ai vraiment encore du mal à réaliser tellement cela a été brutal, inattendu. Je me souviendrai à vie du moment et du lieu où j'ai appris la nouvelle. Je me faisais une joie de te revoir à ton retour de Santa Fe pour échanger nos souvenirs de vacances et reprendre nos conversations tout en tricotant comme d'habitude. Depuis ton arrivée à Santa Fe nous étions d'ailleurs restées en contact par internet. Dans ce qui allait être mon dernier mail pour toi je t'avais dit que j'avais vu jouer des anciens champions de tennis à Roland-Garros. J'avais ainsi joint une photo de John McEnroe. Avec beaucoup d'humour tu m'avais répondu que tu avais eu son frère comme élève et que ce dernier était bien plus poli et calme ! Cet été à Santa Fe devait être le dernier dans ta chère "Casita" avant un transfert pour les prochaines années à Cleveland. Il aura été le dernier tout court. C'est ainsi. Fin juillet, à Prague, j'ai assisté à un concert de musique classique. Au début du morceau "Air" de Jean-Sébastien Bach j'ai spontanément pensé très fort à toi. Je me suis alors mise à pleurer comme une madeleine, c'était incontrô- lable. C'est une belle expression pour toi qui savait si bien cuisiner, pas seulement les gâteaux. J'ai tout simplement été submergée par une vague de tristesse. J'avais encore tant de choses à te dire, à te raconter et surtout à apprendre de toi. Mais parmi ces larmes de tristesse il y avait aussi quelques larmes de joie, la joie de prendre conscience de l'immense chance de t'avoir croisée sur mon chemin. Les personnes exceptionnelles sont rares et j'ai eu la chance de partager des moments avec l'une d'elles, toi. C'est inestimable. Tu resteras assurément présente dans mes pensées et dans mon coeur. Nous avons fait connaissance il y a quelques années lors d'une réunion des "Tricoteuses". Tricoteuse de talent, tu as toujours animé ce groupe avec entrain et efficacité. Ton idée d'instaurer un repas de Noël des "Tricoteuses" a été formidable. Très rapidement nous avons sympathisé et tu étais pour moi bien plus que l'organisatrice en chef des Tricoteuses. C'était tellement agréable de discuter de voyages et de plein d'autres choses avec toi sous ton regard bienveillant. Le groupe des "Tricoteuses" va être bien différent sans toi puisque tu en étais le moteur. Il aura une saveur différente mais il nous reste du pain sur la planche ! Tu aimais bien utiliser cette expression. Nous avons encore beaucoup de laine à tricoter sous ton regard protecteur. Je te remercie d'avoir manifesté beaucoup d'affection à mon égard. Je t'embrasse très fort pour l'éternité et je pense à ton cher Joe,

- Anne-Flore Boulais

I first met Sigun at a Junior Guild luncheon. She was clearly in charge (whether officially or not) but I didn't realize until later that she was also the chef extraordinaire. Someone once told me that Sigun was bossy, but what I saw was an amazing woman who knew how to get things done, when everyone else was standing around waiting for someone to tell them what to do. It didn't take long to realize how much people admired, enjoyed and loved Sigun. I enjoyed volunteering for anything that Sigun was involved in. Lots of other people felt the same. She was kind, big-hearted and generous, and it seemed like everything she did was for others – the Cathedral (Junior Guild, reception, mission & outreach), the Lambda group, les Tricoteuses, the young mothers, Edwige, and a lot more. But it didn't take long to understand that the person she most loved to do things for (and loved) was Joe. Her love and affection for him was touching and a joy to witness. Kim and I both loved being with them together.

I will miss Sigun's smile, twinkling blue eyes, her soft hands on my cheeks as she kissed me hello, and her warm and enveloping hugs. I will miss her stories, her cooking and her endless kindness. I will always treasure her friendship and know that my life is richer because she was a part of it.

With love and happy memories,

- Mary Lou Bradley

I have cooked with Sigun and Christian for perhaps eight years. The receptions and dinner for the new Bishop were due to many, but especially to Sigun. Who would take on an evening cocktail reception for 400, other than Sigun?

The first time I helped with the Junior Guild luncheon, I was hooked. I felt like I was a child again in Indiana watching my Mother and her Fellowship group at the First Christian Church. As at the Cathedral, there were the "regulars" and other helping hands. I grew up watching the interaction including love, com- petition, cooking skills, admiration, faith, friendship and the sense of community and the common goal of spirit. The different personalities of the "regulars" was so interesting to observe over the years. This safe place nurtured me throughout good and difficult times growing up.

This is the feeling I had with Sigun that first Junior Guild Luncheon. She fed my soul and I will miss her greatly. I am lucky to have had those First Christian Church ladies and Sigun in my life.

With gratitude for my time with Sigun.

- Laurel Yoder

Thank you Sigun for touching our lives the way you did, even if we only knew each other for a short while – too short – we will always remember your huge warm smile, your big heart and generosity, and your always giving-serving-selfless self. Till we meet again...

- Joyce and Xavier Chanay

Whatever is meant by the phrase “life force,” Sigun was bursting with it. Enthusiastic, even zealous, she was all in, wherever she felt needed – whether leading the preparation of a dinner for hundreds at the Ca- thedral or sitting desk in the narthex or looking after Joe or visiting one of the elderly shut-ins she adopted. In her eagerness to get things right, she sometimes could be opinionated, but one never doubted her heart was in the right place: she only wanted to help and if possible, to help without de- lay. Her glittering eyes, her warm embrace, the spontaneity of her compassionate regard for others and for our community said it all.

How can it be that such a large and vibrant presence could slip away from us so suddenly? In the empti- ness she leaves behind, we mourn her absence and give thanks we came to know and love her.

- Jeanne & Peter Fellowes

Simplest level: As for all of us, simply as senior producer of kitchen performances, I’m guessing many thousands (over 10,000?) of individual seatings over the years. And not to mention importance of her prep and hosting din- ners at her homes. Who knows? maybe one or more of these affairs, simple or elegant, helped to tip somebody, or a family, to become pledging members.

For myself, I certainly can't declare explicit influence, but she piloted the prep for the simple meals that preceded a parish hall weekly evening series circa 2007, led by Dean Zach and Bill Tompson, about Episcopal church and modern Anglican theology. I was floating then, in the first stages of discomforting divorce business. Compared to my confirmation that required memorizing pre-1979 catechism (1928 language?), and a brief engagement with a sorta Jesus freak evangelical situation, peppered with pentecostal stuff, (among many at the time who could not afford to follow Beatles and other influencers to seek gurus in India, so seized a cheap alternative when pushed my way), Zach's and Bill's liberal takes were decidedly influential.

And then there was that lovely, simple, collegial supping before the lectures. This was the ancient sous-sol movie set kitchen with huge black iron stove. There may have been a dumbwaiter, but I only subsequently learned who was in charge down there. For me at the time, it could have been a phantom in the kitchen. And her spirit must now be soaked into the current, as the very electricity in the walls.

But most importantly – at the time, I attended sporadically, yet she reliably recalled my name and greeted me. At one forum, as I entered she came to me, and with convincing sincerity to tell me she was always pleased to see me join in. This was certainly a tipper.

Sigun greets: Her arm floats up high and big, descends gently on your shoulders, her eyes grab yours, and then with startling vigor, she pulls you in for the bises. Whew!

- Peter Brooks

When I step into the American Cathedral in Paris, in the narthex or the kitchen, in the nave or the sanctuary or at the end of the descent of the tower, I think of Sigun and smile. How she not only made me feel so loved, but her incredible gift to make me feel as if I’d actually made her day. A very special, selfless, Sigun kind of love. - Simon Allatt

My Dear Sigun, I have so many wonderful things in my mind that we shared and did together. May I thank you for all of them. But, we also had a tiny secret connection: our mutual ties to the land of Athens and Corinth. Your mother’s life there and my maternal grandmother who came from there and lived with us when I was growing up in New York. We both kept these connections alive with so many shared incidents and stories. That was our own happy secret. I loved you for keeping that special background alive for me just as I loved you for all you were and all you gave. - Anita Cesbron