FREE issue #5. issue legendary is style our

www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 3

credits contents . . . editorial

LeftLion Magazine Issue 5 June-July 2005 04 Local News For Local People It is an interesting learning curve for us putting this magazine together. For those of you that don’t realise, Editor our team still work (and have always worked) on Jared Wilson 05 Election 2005: Notts Results LeftLion in our spare time and do other ‘day jobs’ as well. We’re just regular people who live in Nottingham, Deputy Editor catch buses to work, buy our dinner in the supermarket Al Needham 06 Joe Buhdha and Mista Jam and do all the things that you do in Hood Town.

Sub Editors Karizma and DJ Format It takes a lot of hard work, but we’re proud of what we Alan Gilby 07 do and we really think we’re making a difference to the Timmy Bates dynamic that makes up life in this city. We’re aiming to Nathan Miller 08 The Magic Heroes give coverage to local people doing things that interest Cristina Chapman us along the way and it’s our belief that anybody who Floyd Ferris is reading this can probably contribute something if David Bowen 09 Left of the Dealer they want to. If you’re interested in doing something, just get in touch. Capeesh? Design David Blenkey 11 The Hellset Orchestra Since we started, other local publications have ceased [email protected] and a few others have arrived in their wake. From us at LeftLion, good luck to them all! It’s not an easy thing Photographers 12 Gob Squad for just anyone to do, but it can only be good for the Ben Dennis scene to have so many people trying. Some of them will Dom Henry Tales From The Business Called Show flourish and some will fail. It’s our task to make sure 13 that LeftLion falls into the former category. Joe Ryder Josh Skinner Kevin Lake 14 The Joys of Skegness: Nottingham’s Putting out this magazine and the time that goes into Petra Dee Medley it, however, does cost money and since we started Favourite Holiday Destination our quest for a true independent voice in Nottingham Illustrators media, we’ve also been learning the cost of business. Ricky Marr Out and About Advertising revenue makes us able to distribute this for Rob White 16 free. What we get as a result is a big audience of people who are keen to listen. If you are involved in a business Contributors 18 Just The Tonic’s Darrell Martin that you think could benefit by working with us then Adrian Bhagat please get in touch. Alex Kocan Bones 19 Nottingham Events Listings This issue contains some quality products of the current Dan Gardner live music scene in Nottingham. The Magic Heroes, The Guy Gooberman Hellset Orchestra and Left of the Dealer are three fine Howell Lovell 25 Nottsword exponents of what the kids are calling ‘Notts-Rock’. Jem Shaw Alongside them we have the hiphop offerings of Joe Roger Mean Buddha and Mista Jam, DJ Format and Karizma, as well 26 Rocky Horrorscopes & The Fun Cave as the Gob Squad theatre crew and a Skegness holiday LeftLion Embassy special. Thanks goes out in particular to Notts artist Yemi Akinpelumi Rikki Marr for his hard work on our awesome Beano-like cover!

“The difference between a brave As always, there’s plenty more coverage of Nottingham man and a coward is a coward culture on our website. The stuff you see in this thinks twice before jumping in the magazine really is just the tip of the iceburg… cage with a lion. The brave man doesn’t know what a lion is. He just thinks he does.” Charles Bukowski [email protected]

LeftLion 349a Mansfield Road Nottingham, NG5 2DA [email protected]

For advertising enquiries please contact: [email protected] office/fax: 0115 9623676 mobile: 07866 312044 The views and opinions of contributors expressed in this 8,000 copies distributed in over 50 magazine are not necessarily those of LeftLion Ltd.. venues around Nottingham 4 www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 Nottingham Voices things people have said local news for on the leftlion forum local people with Guy Gooberman our correspondent in London Save Haywood School Please note that Guy Gooberman is a fictional character and therefore only as real as the news he writes for more painful laughs visit www.lunch-break.co.uk This school is particularly important because there’s no other comp in the local catchment area. Closing it will leave a big gap in the local community of Sherwood, Bestwood, Mapperley Park, Carrington and further afield. The Elusive Pig Jared Mansfield Woodhouse isn’t The catchment is part of the problem, in that there’s a lot of famous for many things (apart disadvantaged young people going due to the area it’s in. from perhaps Andrew Brealey Guy Gooberman Accountants and a distinct lack of soul) but that’s all It’s true that Haywood is a very mixed ability school, with about to change thanks to a troubled kids as well as achievers. But, while it had problems macabre new initiative from a couple of years back mostly due to poor management, it local farmers and government. is now back on track and one of the most improved schools ‘Wild Pig Search’ is a in the entire country. new attraction for stupid apples tourists to waste their time running around after Our elected officials are here to make the right decision not wild pigs on local nature the easy one. I honestly believe closing Haywood would be reserves. The croney who bad for the area, if it only went wrong in the last few years thought up the idea cackled: it can be turned around. “There aren’t any wild pigs Alan of course, but it’ll get the fat juicy tourists in and then we can set upon them and Closing the Haywood site and merging with Bigwood eat their brains.” wouldn’t help re-engage the middle class parents, it would result in even more middle class children going to schools outside the city. On the other hand, a bit of stability and continuity, along with continuing improvement, could help enormously. Nearly Hit And Run Schools To NJM A sick new hobby has quite even going as far as to Be Replaced literally hit the streets ‘slightly maim’ bystanders of Nottingham and everyone shoving their metal weapons Banning Hooded Tops who I know is ruddy shocked on wheels literally into By Pits by it. Normal urban white the faces of the general middle class people are public. One pervert who does The PM has backed a shopping centre that banned anyone getting in their motor cars this every Saturday night In a controversial move to wearing caps or hoods. The reasoning seems to be that and mounting kerbs to see said: “We tried dogging for save money and streamline the people wearing caps and hoods are hard to identify on how close they can get them a while, but the wife can’t education system, schools CCTV. Well... yeah. What did they expect? to pedestrians. Some of the park properly. This is much are to be destroyed and NJM sick, twisted bastards are better…” replaced by massive pits, dug deep into the Earth’s crust. There should be no rule to ever stop you wearing what you Nottingham will be piloting want to. The shopping centre has the right to ban them the policy. Local Education (it’s their building) but they’re going to lose a vast amount Forest Fan Awol Apparatchik, PJ Bust said: of business. “Instead of schools we’ll have holes in the earth which Jamie The fact that Nottingham held some chickens and a children will be thrown Forest were relegated to the labrador hostage for four in and whoever crawls out I think it’s fair enough. I wear a hoodie but if I need to lower reaches of the earth days. He eventually freed alive will be deemed to have I can take it off. If a ban stopped all the little shits lurking hit one fan too hard for the labrador after painting graduated. It’s the epitome in shopping centres and throwing chips at old people, or words…but I’ll try. Mr Craig it red but the chickens of natural selection, but allowed the police/security to arrest/catch them I’m all David of Porchester Road, were ground down into a fine in a pit and with the added for it. Mapperley (who shall remain powder that Mr David used as possibility that some of the dlex anonymous) was so shook up a deadly snuff to kill his kids will be forced into that he locked himself in a mind. cannibalism.” I think that it’s good that the government are finally opening disused tramp’s house and their eyes, but by targeting all people in hoodies, they’re are going the wrong way about it. Ollie

Yet again, the government targets symptoms of a problem Boy With Enormous Head rather than the causes. People don’t shoplift and vandalise because they wear hoodies, they do it because they are Savaged By Army Of Baboons poor, have nothing else to take out their rage on, and because of other anti-social conditions. hipster k An Abbey Park teenager with street corners. They are said a massive swollen cranium to have assaulted the odd- induced by copious amounts looking young man because: of glue, was attacked by a “He was asking for it”. make your voice heard remorseless bunch of angry Police are on the hunt for a baboons earlier this month. gang of talking primates who, www.leftlion.co.uk/forum These primates have been when caught, will be sold to upsetting the Rushcliffe science, taught to smoke and population for quite experimented on in the most some time with their lewd horrendous manner possible. behaviour and hooting on www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 5 ELECTION 2005: NOTTS RESULTS

In a General Election of widely varying swings and some unlikely results, the political landscape of Nottinghamshire bucked the national trend by staying almost completely ������ � �

unchanged since the last election. �

�

�

�

� words: Nathan Miller �

�

� � � �

Within the city, Labour’s leapfrog the Conservatives strong constituency triumvirate of Heppell, and take second place by MPs, retained their Simpson and Allen held their just 22 votes. They improved seats but saw their seats fairly comfortably, as their performance in the other majorities slashed, was expected. Graham Allen’s constituencies whilst the Tory making them major win in Nottingham North gave vote actually fell, with the Tory targets for the him very nearly exactly the result that all three seats will future. That may prove small same majority as he entered be definite three-horse races a tall order though, with challenge, the campaign with (down by in the next election. former TV personality Anna but not 69 votes to 12,171). Allen is Soubry failing to increase the enough to one of Britain’s tallest MPs and South of the river, Conservative vote in Gedling change anything. has been both a Labour whip Nottingham’s most senior and the Lib Dems showing the Most of their apparent and an Iraq War rebel during politician, Tory grandee most improvement in both gains were really Labour his parliamentary career. and former Chancellor Ken constituencies. losses, with the vast Clarke, won his ninth straight majority of Labour Alan Simpson has always election in Rushcliffe and Amongst the smaller parties, defectors switching to been considered something nearly doubled his majority, the Greens seemed to the Lib Dems or smaller of a rebel, having been a now up to 12,974. At the have had the best election, parties. In 2009 (or thorn in Tony Blair’s side ever time of writing, the Jazz- generally coming fourth whenever the next since he led the campaign to loving, Europhile friend of (often just ahead of UKIP) Election comes) Labour keep Clause IV. His share of tobacconists was suggesting in the seats they contested, will have to defend the vote was down slightly he might stand for the with Green candidate Ashley their Nottingham from previous years, though leadership of his party when Baxter keeping his deposit seats to stay in he managed to win a still- Michael Howard steps down in Nottingham East. UKIP Government, whilst respectable majority of 7,486. in the autumn. Howard, who themselves managed to the Conservatives There was some excitement claimed he would be too old keep a deposit in Nottingham must successfully in Nottingham East when to fight the next election, is a North, although the prediction gain seats here The Guardian mistakenly year younger than Clarke but of their candidate, spiritualist to have any hope reported that Labour whip the Old Nottinghamian is still medium Irena Marriott, that (who won of returning to John Heppell’s majority had one of the most respected and she would unseat Graham Labour’s Bethnal power. With the Liberal been cut to under a thousand. well-liked Tory MPs. Don’t put Allen proved false. She lost by Green and Bow seat in London Democrats increasing their In actuality, the party enforcer too much money on it, but it’s more than 16,000 votes but from Blairite Oona King) is share of the vote considerably had won by 6,939 votes but just possible that Cuddly Ken vowed to return. once again Westminster’s at this election they will need his majority was down by could be Britain’s next Prime favourite maverick pantomime to build on their results in more than 3,000 since 2001. Minister. Robert Kilroy-Silk’s most public villain. However, it remains to Nottingham, especially in the humiliation since the infamous be seen whether the public at three city seats, to prove they Whilst it may have seemed Notts’ other Tory MP, ‘bucket of shit’ incident took large think the War in Iraq is are a real alternative and not like business as usual for Newark’s Patrick Mercer (who, place on Election night in still a more important issue just an anti-war protest party. the winners, with neither a incidentally, recently claimed Erewash. Liz Blackman held than immigration. Thankfully, Although turnout was up threatened Tory ‘resurgence’ to have never purchased the seat comfortably for very few BNP candidates stood slightly on 2001, the apparent nor the Lib Dem’s positive a CD) also increased his Labour from the Tories, but anywhere near Notts, although predictability of results here campaign and opposition to lead over Labour with a the Veritas founder proved the party did have some could end up breeding further the War managing to trouble majority of 6,464 but the to be an irrelevance. He kept relatively significant results in apathy. This would be a Labour’s vote too much, the Conservatives failed to take his deposit but took less than London and the North West. shame, since constituencies in fight between the two losing either of the region’s two 3,000 votes. With his new Notts, which is geographically parties was much closer. In key marginal Labour seats. party performing as badly or The local results reflected about as ‘Middle England’ as Nottingham East, the Liberal Gedling’s Vernon Coaker and worse across the country, it the national picture, with the you can get, will prove crucial Democrats even managed to Broxtowe’s Nick Palmer, both looks like George Galloway Conservatives mounting a in future elections.

Who’s In The House?

Nottinghams MPs (l-r): Alan Simpson, Graham Allen, John Heppell, Ken Clarke, Nick Palmer, Vernon Coaker, Patrick Mercer. In the shithouse: Robert Kilroy-Silk. 6 www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5

Joe Buhdha and Mista Jam have been at the helm of SureShot Entertainments Ltd for the past few years. Within that time, they’ve not only worked to establish Joe Buhdha as one of the finest producers and Mista Jam as one of the most entertaining deejays and hosts in hiphop period, but they have also set up UK Takeover, which has grown to become the biggest British hiphop event in the UK. words: Bones photo: Petra Medley

How old are you two? Have either of you ever been process it’s been to put us in a in Nottingham that are making How have you seen hiphop Hiphop keeps you fresh, it’s an emcee? position to release music and good music. change and how does it youthful. Buhdha’s actually 55 but Buhdha used to be in a crew DVDs. Irregardless of what make you feel? he looks 20. Jam’s actually 110. called MC’s Logik but decided other people think of them, What do you feel is weak? We’ve seen hiphop change to put down the mic when the we’re proud. Moments every As with hiphop in general, we from being underground to How and when did you meet? S3000 called him. Jam has day we wake up and realise feel there are one too many mainstream. In 2005, there are Buhdha saw Jam on Crossroads never been an emcee but that this is what we do for a crews, labels and artists who few things that hiphop culture and at the time was looking for there’s still time...! living. We have conversations have lost their sense of quality hasn’t touched, from other a chef for a restaurant he was about bringing KRS One & control and will just put out any genres of music, to media, to planning to open. Buhdha asked The rap market is flooded with Rahzel to Nottingham or we’re old shite and expect others fashion to journalism and we him for a CV and instead got product both domestic and discussing who we’d like on the to support it. We could also personally think it’s a good a mixtape. We started working American. Justify my love... next Takeover or what’s going do with people stepping up thing. If it means we can make together from Bring Da Noize in Justify my love? Wasn’t that a to happen when Klashnekoff their level of professionalism, a living out of doing what we about 2000. song by Madonna? Our love comes to Nottingham to but once again, that isn’t a love then it’s fine by us. The is that we love music, hiphop, record. We then turn these Nottingham-only criticism, the only thing we don’t like is the What are your roles within vibes and love doing what conversations into reality. same can be said for all music amount of vultures it’s created SureShot Entertainments? we’re doing. There’s no better That’s a great position to be everywhere. who are only here to rape and Buhdha’s responsible for the feeling than doing what you in and we’re proud to be in it pillage what they can from ideas and the music. He runs love doing for a job. If you’re every moment of the day. Describe your hiphop ethos, the scene and water it down the studio while Jam works feeling what we’re doing, then particularly as part of a genre and repackage it without no with our other partner Ed to thanks for your support. Your What do you feel is strong now about 30 years old. knowledge or understanding of do the day-to-day stuff in the love for hiphop can only be about Nottingham hiphop? Our ethos is all about quality. the culture. All we can do is put office. There’s a lot of hard justified by yourself. There are strong foundations When you buy a SureShot out music and put on events work involved though. We for hiphop in this town so release, or go to a SureShot that we’re feeling and hope both produce and deejay but Any particular proud we’re just working to continue night, you know that everything others feel the same. Jam’s taking a break from the moments or releases? that tradition and invest in the about it is quality because we production and Buhdha’s taking All of our releases we’re proud future for the next generation of know quality stands the test of a break from playing records! of because we know the hiphop. There’s a lot of people time. Substance over volume. www.uktakeover.net www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 7 Old School Format Two years ago Brighton-based DJ Format released his first album ‘Music for the Mature B-Boy’. It was an unexpected commercial success, showcasing his hiphop credentials to the fullest and gaining him kudos around the country. words: Jared Wilson

Since then he’s been back to When Abdominal and D-Sisive Very much so. I think one of the studio to record the follow get together there’s some us is adopted. I’ve seen the up ‘If You Can’t Join Em... kind of chemistry. It’s like the milkman and he’s an ugly Beat Em’. Format and his Beastie Boys or something bloke with a very big nose. Canadian sidekicks, rappers you know. Individually they’re Sometimes it makes me Abdominal and D-Sisive played quite different, but together wonder where I came from… at Stealth’s first birthday party they give a really good in Nottingham earlier this year. balance. I read that you drove the We caught up with Format, tourbus for Jurrassic 5 real name Matt, for a few What’s your favourite around the UK in 1998 words… breakfast cereal? I drove them around the UK You and Abdominal are a Special K with chocolate, and consulted with them on pretty tight partnership banana and raisins added. record buying shops around these days… That’s what I have in the the country on a daily basis. morning… I love to listen to their music I had him on the first album and as you can imagine it and somehow we managed to Any thoughts on Robin wasn’t a hard decision to take If you could work with any Have you heard much turn two tracks into a whole Hood? them up on it at the time… musical artist who would Nottingham hiphop? forty five minute show. He you choose? was bought in to expand the He’s a bit of a legend, yeah. You toured alongside them I know Ivory from the P live element and he’s brought I guess I could make a a few years after… Could I have a time machine? Brothers, so I’m aware of some something really special to comparison to how I make my of that stuff, but I’m not really the mix. I love touring with music, stealing beats off some Yes. When Abdominal and Yeah…. someone who listens to a lot of him because he takes the great old musicians and giving myself toured with them it was contemporary music. I respect pressure. it back to the kids of today. 2003. Now that was the best Cool. I’d work with Big Daddy what they’re doing, but I’m three weeks of my life! Loads Kane. He was a real legend. just engrossed into my own What do you think D-Sisive Is your sister a foxy lady of great memories! stuff, which is usually sampling has brought to the show? like you say on the album? stuff that is decades old. The Dapper Rapper Karizma (aka 23 year old Alex from Mapperley) has been smashing live hiphop shows in Nottingham of late, with a verbal assault of quality vocals. He is often found double teaming with local human beatboxer Foz and has been a resident at Camouflage nights for the past year or so. photo: Josh Shinner

Karizma first came to Who else do you rate in the but then I met people like Lee Did you vote in the recent light as part of Big Trev’s Nottingham hiphop scene? Ramsay and Scorz and Fedel election? Outdaville crew with C-Mone, and all them other mans. Scorzayzee, Lee Ramsay, Big Trev, Joe Buddha, Mr Working with Trev was just full I’m afraid I didn’t. I was on DJ Fever and the rest. Since Jam, Black Viking, Notts Inna of energy and all the different holiday with a very special their split he has continued to Nuttin and Wariko. I think 45 lives that went into the project person. Before it I was sitting with ply his trade as an emcee in is smashing it. Respect to all made it something really family talking and realised that I Nottingham, dividing his time crews tho really. Dealmaker special. never understood a lot of things between putting out tracks for and Camouflage. Tempa was about politics and parliament. Dealmaker records and raising in OutDaville with me and it A good learning No-one really teaches you those a family. was good to see her repping experience? things in school. on TV. What records got you into I think it was the ideal What do you think about hiphop? Tell us about some of you breeding ground for what I’m Forest getting relegated..? best memories from the doing now, obviously we’re The first big tune I ever heard Outdaville days. not all together anymore, but It’s a sad day, but I actually was on Heatwave FM and it we’re all doing good things support Liverpool. My dad was heavy. That was the first Those were like a foundation, and there is no negative followed them and it’s been ever tune where I thought that like being a rapper apprentice. energy between us at all. passed down through my was hiphop and I’m definitely When I started I didn’t really We’re all looking out for each family. It’s not that bad for feeling that! The rest was a have a clue. I had an inkling of other as we experienced a lot Forest tho, they’ll come back… natural progression… it and the very raw material, together. have no fears.

Also new on www.leftlion.co.uk: Streetbeats Interview and Audio, Taskforce Interview and Audio 8 www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 Seventies ‘Frobacks Words: Al Needham :: Pictures: Dom Henry

They rock, they roll, they take Chris: My Dad used to play Stav: The Social’s a home from Chris: You can’t go anywhere One of your new songs is about their shirts off and turn down Cream non-stop in the car. I’d be home for us. Killer audience, without someone commenting on it. Whycliffe, isn’t it? interesting career opportunities strapped in listening to 20-minute great venue, and we drink there If we go anywhere near Flares, some at Poundland in the name of Ginger Baker drum solos… anyway. Rock City for A Drop In girl will always say “Is that real?” Stav: He got chewed up and spat NottsRock. They played at this The Ocean was also very special. and then try to rip your scalp off. out by the record industry. I used year’s A drop In The Ocean Ian: There’s something so to feel really sad when I saw him, festival on two different stages, captivating about the 70s for Chris: Just to be on the same Stav: But we wouldn’t be in a and thought “Yeah, that could be but they look like they haven’t us. The look, the sound, and the stage that Bowie and all those band if we didn’t want to be me in a few years if I go down the seen the inside of a barber shop stagecraft are all so extravagant. people have played on was a noticed. wrong road”. I used to buy food since the last century. privilege. Like everyone else, we for him, until he asked me why. You’ve put out your first CD off wanted to chip in to the Tsunami Is taking your shirts off onstage After that he never looked at me They are Paul ‘Stav’ Mylonas, your own backs… appeal, but we were skint. So the for practical reasons, or just in the same way again. It’s more Chris Reeve and Ian Starr, better best thing we could do was make poncing about? of an anti-crack song, if anything. known as funky Nottingham Stav: It’s taken us two years and a racket. Nottingham band The Magic cost five grand. Chris: If you ever got on stage So who’s that bloke who does an Heroes. God help us if there’s a So who are you rating in Hood and jumped about like an idiot for encore with you every now and war… Chris: We packed in jobs for this, Town at the moment? 45 minutes, you’d want to take then? so a lot of the money has come out your shirt off as well. So how did it start for the Magic of our savings, credit cards, gigs, Chris: The Hellset Orchestra Chris: He’s The K, goddamnit! Heroes? and a bit of garden centre work. look like they’ve just come out of Ian: It makes us feel a bit animal, a time machine after robbing a to be honest. Stav: He’s a good friend and Ian: We were in a band during Stav: I was offered an interview to music shop of all their maddest a great musician. He’s got a sixth form called Spinner, playing be manager of Poundland opposite instruments, but it works Chris: But then again, we fantastic voice. every grotty pub in town. Slab Square, but I somehow perfectly. No guitars. supported Doctor Feelgood at managed to turn it down. Mansfield and the audience was Chris: He was the first person Chris: We used to clear the pubs Ian: Left Of The Dealer. We’ve full of middle-aged miners…so who believed in us and told us we out until only our mates were You’ve played pretty much played with them a few times and the shirts stayed on. had the potential. And he’s been left, and they were absolutely every venue in town. What’s they get better and better. Really there, done that, and knows his steaming. And so were we. One your fave? funky and tight, and they’re great So what’s the most Rock n’ Roll shit backwards. of them would grab your arm mid- songwriters. thing you’ve ever done? solo and shout; “I’m off, mate!” Stav: Stealth last Christmas Eve. Finally…who’s your personal Yeah, nice one, but I’m just a bit Unfortunately, we forgot to ask for So, Ian…why haven’t you got an Stav: One of our mates stole a Magic Hero? busy now… our money after. Afro yet? bus, and we went on a random excursion round Nottingham. It Chris: Paul Daniels. Stav: The band splintered about Chris: It was Christmas. We were Ian: I’ve been trying! I’ve been even broke down at one point, four years ago, and we started fucked! eating my crusts, but it’s just not and we had to hotwire it and give Ian: George Clinton. from square one. happening. it a push. Ian: We love the Rescue Rooms, Stav: Jimi Hendrix. Why the 70s fixation? but we’re cursed there. Last time Stav: If you want to get your hair Chris: When the trams started we played there the drum kit like this, readers, don’t cut it, and running, I tried to get a kroggy all Chris: Shit, can I change mine? Ian: It’s not contrived. I suppose wasn’t lashed down properly. It then get up in the morning and the way to Hucknall. But a copper it comes from our parents… nearly walked to the bar for a pint just go out. For two years. put me in a chokehold and told No. at one point… me not to be so stupid. Chris: Oh.

Magic Heroes play LeftLion Presents at Malt Cross on Friday 29th July www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 9

Poker Faces Once a three-pronged acoustic guitar attack with a Mansfield-like disregard for electricity, Left of The Dealer have beefed up their membership (and as a result their sound) as of late. words: Alex Kocan. photos: Kevin Lake

The three original members matter what they’re into. want to learn more covers. I understand that you he picked up every drum part are Tommy G (vocals), Jakey We’re also all good looking People love to hear stuff they are big fans of Wonder in about four days. B (guitar, backing vocals) and chaps as well. know the words to. But our Stuff singer and LeftLion Russ (rhythm guitar, backing focus is on our own stuff. Our contributor Miles Hunt... Jakey B: My worst gig was vocals). In the last few How did the band come songs are accessible to all, with my old band in 1999. One months they have been joined about? that’s what it’s always been Russ: When I was about ten person stayed for one song... by Adam (bass) and Saimon about for us. my sister was heavily into the and that was my dad! Yeah, (drums). Russ: It was originally me and Wonder Stuff. It was the lyrics even my dad left after one Jake. Then we met Tommy How do you write the lyrics and the songwriting that hit song! Together the five of them look in Bar Humbug. He had a for your songs? me. good, singing and playing their golden voice and we needed Who are your musical instruments whilst displaying him in the band. After that we Tommy G: I write about Tommy G: The lyrics are really influences? precocious songwriting ability. spent three years writing and my emotions. To write an inspired. These traits have marked singing in kitchens. emotional song you have Jakey B: John Martin, Pink them out as one of the to be in the moment. I Russ: He’s really aware, he Floyd, Genesis. freshest and promising new You used to be a three- also sometimes just write writes about real things. We’ve bands in the city. We cornered piece until recently. interesting words that sound covered a song called Manna Russ: I’d go with Pink Floyd them in the Trip to Jerusalem What’s that done to your nice. from Heaven that he wrote. again, not to copy Jake, Nick for a chat about cover music? Drake, Miles Hunt. I think versions, the Wonder Stuff and Jakey B: We have a really What have been your best Miles is one of the greatest Damian Rice beatboxing... Russ: As the rhythm guitarist strict filter regarding lyrics. and worst gigs to date? songwriters ever. I can do a little less work. I Songs need to be about You were recently don’t have to make up for the something. Tommy G: Definitely Stealth! Adam: Me and Saimon are described on the LeftLion lack of drums anymore. I can It was our first time with the really into Root. But I also like forum as ‘the best boyband just ring out a chord and the Russ: What music is about new line up. That was our stuff like Chili Peppers and in Nottingham’. What do drums and bass carry it on. I for me is trying to convey tightest gig. The PA system Jamiroquai. I sort of grew up you think to that? can also concentrate more on emotions and feelings that was good and my voice on that stuff. the songwriting. you cannot when talking to sounded crystal clear. It was (Everyone laughs) someone normally. It’s nice the most people we’ve played Tommy G: I grew up listening What’s the name Left of when people hear it and think in front of and we supported to Motown, my mum’s really Siamon: Really? Were we? the Dealer about? ‘Oh my god that’s what he’s our good friends The Magic into that. Also I like listening Amazing! feeling’. For me, that’s what Heroes on that night as well. to funk. I think I’ve got a Tommy G: Left of the Dealer is music is all about. The LeftLion Presents Malt bit of funk in my writing as Tommy G: Our music is about about poker really. But it’s also Cross gig last year was really well. We’re all into hiphop nice sounds and harmonies. about passing a spliff to the Who are your other good too! separately. Also Damien Rice The harmony thing is probably left once you’ve rolled it. favourite Nottingham definitely. He can rap! where the boyband thing bands? Adam: I’d say it was Stealth. comes from. I guess we Do you still do cover We’d literally had three Russ: He actually does write music which is a little versions? Jakey B: The Magic Heroes. practices and Saimon had beatbox! bit crossover. It’s accessible. Adam: Computerman. They’re picked up everything. Due to Anyone can appreciate it no Tommy G: Yep, we do. We just fantastic. his amazing technical ability,

www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 11 words: Jared Wilson illustration: Michael White

Since their incarnation at the beginning of last year, The Hellset Orchestra have led a merry danse macabre through the live music scene in Nottingham. First viewings of them have been met with a mix of surprise and awe from happy yet slightly bewildered crowds.

There are seven in the orchestra You’ve done quite a lot since music lessons. You can’t teach Dan F: I do all the design and the about 4.30pm on the main stage in total; Nadia Malik and Daniel then... people how to rock!! website for the band. I’m also on Saturday afternoon. It’s Oliver (violins), the dandy- doing some freelance filming for rumoured that other bands on the like Jason Thacker (sax), Amy Michael: It feels like that! When Which other local bands are you an art project at the moment, and bill include Slayer, the Stranglers Nicholson (cello), Adam Sharrocks we played A Drop In The Ocean feeling? some other websites. and the Chemical Brothers. (drums), Daniel Frazer (bass) and at Rock City it was almost a year There’s also a human beatbox guy Michael Wetherburn (singer/ to the day after it began. It’s Michael: Punish The Atom. I like Michael: Away from Hellset, I’ve from Nottingham called Petebox. organist/top-hatted overlord). always been a personal goal to their theatrical nature and it’s been working on a symphony play upstairs at Rock City. obvious that they have thought that might be based around the Michael: We’re also playing the Whoever you are and whatever about their performance. I also twelve labours of Herakles. As for TMF Rock Festival in Essex in you’re into, there is sure to be How would you describe your really like a band called Lords, the other members, Adam was August which we’re all excited something that attracts you about music? which is two guitarists and a born to drum. He just ‘is drums’. about. this seemingly odd collection of drummer from Notts, playing musicians when they descend Dan O: I’d describe it as dramatic heavy dirty blues. I’m really into Dan O: Amy does a lot of Will there be an album soon? on the stage. At first you wonder prog. Legion of Doom as well, if King performance stuff too. She works what is going to happen. Then, Arthur’s knights were in a metal for a company called Reckless Michael: We’ve just about when they start playing, you Michael: If I was pushed I’d say band, they’d sound like them. Sleepers and does her own thing finished working on our debut realise this really is a band that we are neo-disco power prog! under the banner of Shrug. Jason mini-album entitled ‘Greetings makes music unlike anything Nadia: I’m a fan of the Magic makes music, both on his own From The Great Humongous’, you’ve ever heard before... Nadia: People see me coming in Heroes. I really like their afros. and with another band. He’s which will be out this summer. with my violin at work and ask recorded about thirty solo albums It’s going to have six tracks on How did you decide to start the me what kind of music I play. I Dan O: I’m in another band called by now, which you can probably it and an enhanced section with Hellset Orchestra? just tell them that it’s theatrical Master with a ukulele, a banjo only hear if you go around to his two music videos. pop rock type stuff. and a clarinet. It has a contrasting house. Michael: I was playing guitar in relationship with Hellset, but both Dan F: We’ve got the album a band, but I wanted to use my Is it true that you’re all from bands are about performance What’s coming up for you over launch at the Rescue Rooms on piano playing background. The classical music backgrounds? rather than just music. the next few months… Saturday 2nd July. We’ll put on a initial plan was to have a band few other bands and probably do with a keyboard, bass and drums Dan O: I don’t really like to be What do you do when you’re not Michael: This summer we’re some kind of deal where you get in an Eels/Ben Folds style mould. described as that. I think that in the Orchestra? playing in Germany at a festival cheaper entry if you wear a cape, Then we invited a group of friends there is something quite boring called Das Fest. We played a monocle or some other item of along and after our first practice about classical musicians who Dan O: I make performance showcase at Rescue Rooms and Victoriana. together we realised everyone pretend to be in rock groups. art in a collective called Aunty were asked to play at the festival. brought a different element. We’re doing this because it’s Nazi. It’s quite intense, audience It’s our first gig outside of Britain. what we want to do, not for any participation stuff. www.thehellsetorchestra.co.uk Dan F: We played our first gig in other reason. Dan F: It’s part of a scheme from February 2004 at Bunkers Hill. It Nadia: I design underwear for the council to get better links felt a bit unrehearsed, but when Michael: If you say that we’re Cortaulds textiles, which is a job I with the city of Karlsruhe in we went through it just seemed ‘classically trained’ then that love. I’m also training to do a half Germany, with which Nottingham to totally click. probably just means we had marathon at the moment. is twinned. We’re playing at 12 www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5

Born Lippy Gob Squad are an innovative performance company who originate from Nottingham but also include members from Germany. Their shows make use of video technology and involve a lot of audience interaction. words: Adrian Baghat

Recently, Gob Squad have We would describe it as a live returned to the city with two film. There are four performers productions as part of the who set off round the city with nottdance05 festival. Room video cameras an hour before Service took place in the Park the audience arrives. Our Plaza Hotel where the audience mission is to save Nottingham watched and interacted with four from anonymity and banality frustrated commercial travellers by giving it a supreme moment spending another lonely night of beauty through a screen kiss in stark hotel rooms. They also between a member of the public performed Super Night Shot and the hero, who is one of the by taking cameras around the performers. Other performers city and involving the public have to find a willing member of in making a ‘live film’ which the public, publicise the event was then shown to the theatre and find a location for it. We all audience. I spoke with Sarah meet up at the location and, if Thom, performer and an original casting has found somebody, then member of the Gob Squad about we have this screen kiss and the their antics in Nottingham. film is a romance. If they haven’t, then it becomes a tragedy. We all Can you tell me a bit about how go back to the theatre and film the Gob Squad started? the audience who are waiting to go in. Then we stop the cameras, Some of us were on the rewind the tapes and show the Contemporary Arts Course at four films simultaneously on four Nottingham Trent University video projectors, totally uncut and and got together for a show at raw. Of course, it’s strange for us Glastonbury. We’d met some of because we’re watching our own the German members through a film. university exchange programme and together formed Gob Squad. Are you saying anything about We stayed on in Nottingham for reality television with your the rooms are the same. What do What’s the strangest thing a a long time but then we were You’ve performed this play productions? the staff think of you doing this performer has been asked to do? invited to be artists in residence in many different places. Do in their hotel? in Berlin so now we have bases in different cities give a different The idea of voyeurism and who is Nottingham was the first place both cities. reaction? watching who has always been We tell it like it is. People who we’d been asked to do nudity and a big question in the study of work in hotels know all the rooms Simon was asked to be naked The night I saw Room Service, I don’t generalise about it. Some performance art. The question look the same and they know all three nights. It’s very hard to about an hour after you started people would say that people are was around before reality TV there are people there who are shock us because when we were two comically drunk girls more reserved in Germany, but it and before we started as well. lonely and isolated. I always love rehearsing we were making up all turned up in little black dresses varies night by night. If you get I would say that reality TV took it because you go into a hotel like sorts of things. We all thought me and dominated the audience two people like those girls in the inspiration from performance art that and first of all the staff are being asked to give birth in the interaction. A lot of people audience, that changes the whole and created Big Brother rather a little guarded, but by the time bath was a good one. thought they were stooges. Were evening. It depends whether the than the other way around. Like we leave they are really friendly. they friends of yours? audience want to invest, they everyone, I was fascinated by At Park Plaza people from the I remember in Zagreb, there get the show they deserve. The the concept of Big Brother at first bar came and watched it and the was a really young audience of No, absolutely not! It’s funny, we Friday night show in Nottingham but I quickly found that I wanted security staff absolutely loved it. arts students and, right from the had no idea what they looked was one of the most interactive more interaction. One in particular was talking to beginning, they started phoning like or who they were. Some of that we have had. I think it might us at the end and said he’d never the room until we had to abandon my friends were in the audience be because in Nottingham there www.gobsquad.com seen anything like it. Some people the structure and just go with and afterwards they were asking is a real history for this stuff. The would never go to a play and it and let them take the lead. us ‘Who were those girls?’ I Contemporary Arts course has definitely not an experimental That was probably the craziest wonder if they’d just wandered been really amazing. It has been Read reviews of Room Service performance so it’s great to make performance! into it. They weren’t typical going for ten years and there has and Super Night Shot at contact like that. theatre audience members and always been an audience for it. www.leftlion.co.uk/theatre apparently one of them had to How would you describe Super When I saw Room Service, Night Shot? be escorted off the premises for You take the piss out of the Simon was asked to do naked being too drunk. soullessness of hotels where all cartwheels by the audience. www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 13 The Death Knell Of A Far From Glorious Career... words: Howell Lovell illustration: Rob White

There was a time on British television when the talent show was an integral part of British Saturday night. By the nineties, however, the talent show format of pulling hopeful musicians, comics and magicians from clubs, pubs and holiday camps and giving them a crack on the telly was all but dead and about to be put finally to rest by a new generation of Pop Idol and Fame Academy. Before it snuffed it there was one last hurrah in the mid-nineties, Jonathan Ross’ Big, Big Talent Show.

Sadly I was on it. I had been playing saxophone in various cheesy bands for quite a while (five years or more) and it was beginning to wear thin. I was not quite happy about the progression of my career. At first it had all gone pretty much to plan. I spent three years at Music College and then joined my first pro band. Only a Blues Brothers tribute band but everyone has to start somewhere. I remember being thrilled after playing my (along with June Whitfield, the end they gave up and decided Then, in the middle of the sour Gary Bushell who were sat in first gig, a nightclub in Wakefield Eddie Kidd and Frank Bruno). I to trust luck. We retired to the cow’s rehearsal, Charlotte Church armchairs. Their conversation one wet Wednesday night. It was was now playing with a cheesy pub ready for the recording the made her television debut and went something like this: a shithole. There were bloodstains rock’n’roll outfit from Mansfield. next day. I knew we were fucked. Then a on the wall of the dressing room My first gig was on New Years podgy kid, she was doing a little “So Gary, what did you think of and, more bizarrely, Tom O’ Eve at a Mecca bingo hall. After Sometimes I despise London. guest spot as she happened to be the Wock and Wollers?” Connor had scrawled an offensive that, things went downhill. Rock The pub we went to had a the Welsh singer’s niece. Looking “Dated Jonathan, very dated. message above the fireplace. and roll clubs in dingy working band playing. It soon became about nine, she filled the studio They made a big mistake doing a men’s clubs, jive clubs, where deflatingly obvious that they with this huge, angelic voice. To non-original number.” The next few years were spent the audience were solely intent were better than we were. make matters worse, her Aunt’s “But they did an original number” mercilessly flogging the world of on dancing and didn’t even They managed to finish their song, which had sounded pretty “Oh fuck, we’ll have to do that cabaret. Up and down the country acknowledge your presence, numbers at about the same pace unimpressive when backed by again” in rented transits, playing working Elvis weekenders at Pontins and they had started them for one. I a guitar, now had the benefit of “Cut!” men’s clubs, dodgy nightclubs, holiday parks in North Wales. The started to get a sinking feeling being accompanied by the BBC Take two. caravan parks, weddings, student average age of the crowd was in the pit of my stomach. A little studio band, which rather filled it balls. This was supposed to have about 55. I found the only way voice kept telling me that this out. We were next and our sound “So Gary, what did you think of been only the first rung on the to survive was to view it with a experience was going to prove seemed even tinnier than usual. the Wock and Wollers?” ladder to fame, but soon I was detached irony, whilst drinking the humiliating final nail in my “Dated Jonathan, very dated. stuck. I thought a couple of years heavily and smoking enough career, impossible to ever live Come show time and we had They made a big mistake doing learning the ropes, paying my dope to tranquillise an elephant. down. Up until then, most of my changed into our showaddy- an original number” dues, then the call would come Introspection, I found, was best friends had never seen the band waddy style zoot suits, made from UB40 or Sting needing a sax avoided. and so I could retain a shred of especially for the occasion. They I was outraged and started to player and before long I would dignity and pretence. Now I was were huge in a putrid shade of mouth obscenities at him. He own an island in the Caribbean. If I was getting desperate, but going on national telly, this would yellow. Jonathan Ross introduced carried on mercilessly slagging not Sting or UB40, at least Chumba finally the call came. We had our be blown to pieces along with my us and we were away. About half us off while we stood there bloody Wumba. big chance. We secured a place credibility. But it was too late, I way through I had to run to the with desperate forced smiles on prime time Saturday night had to do it, I was desperate. front of the stage and get down for the camera. The worst thing While others were soaring, I was telly. Jonathan Ross’ Big Big on my knees to play a raunchy was everything he was saying stuck in cabaret hell. I played Talent Show. This was it! By the next morning, we had solo. Although only about two was true. We were crap and a holiday camp in King’s Lynn picked ourselves up and were and a half minutes long, the song everybody knew it. But being whose pre-show entertainment The first obstacle occurred during psychologically ready. We had seemed to last about 2 and a half told this by Gary Bushell was consisted of a sweaty middle- rehearsal. We had to go through met and heard the competition hours. Finally thank God, it was somehow hard to take. aged man wearing a plastic our number a few times while and weren’t that impressed. There over. chicken suit, entertaining the crew timed the piece and was a sour woman from South The woman from the black aggressive ten year olds. I played worked out camera shots etc. Wales who obviously thought I knew we hadn’t won and country with the clarinet won. We a solo lying on my back kicking The problem was our drummer, a she was something special, a needed a drink badly. We went back to where we my feet in the air like a dying fly, balding middle aged Italian, who really bad, but friendly illusionist hightailed it to the bar and belonged. I have never seen the whilst children laughed at me. had tremendous difficulty keeping couple and a gangly comedienne necked a couple of lagers. Having programme and never want to. It wasn’t fair. I was an artist. I a steady tempo. What would start from the black country whose act downed two pints in ten minutes Showbusiness. Fuck it. demanded to be taken seriously. at a brisk yet relaxed beat would, involved playing comedy clarinet. I felt a little uninhibited. All of by the end of the song, have I was starting to feel a little more the acts were lined up on stage I left the Blues Brothers tribute reached an almost manic speed confident, this was my ticket out to receive the verdict. I was illustration: Rob White band, just before their moment and intensity. By the fifth attempt, of this life. Did Sting watch The on the end of the line nearest www.thearthole.co.uk of glory appearing on the 100th he was pouring with sweat. In Big Big Talent Show? to Jonathan and his sidekick, edition of Noel’s House Party 14 www .leftlion.co.uk/issue5 www .leftlion.co.uk/issue5 15 If you were born around these parts, chances are that at some point you will have sampled the delights (?) of the nearest words: Al Needham coastline to Nottingham, the much fabled party town of Skegness in Lincolnshire. From fish and chips, toxic beaches, penny machines and the Jolly Fisherman, LeftLion takes a look at the cult of beach holidays in the East Midlands and... twelve things that were skill about skeggy�

1. Your Mam buying you clothes at Goose Fair and parking up on nearby wasteground, only to fi nd there’s a JCB digger there. Sitting on a manky you can eat ‘em without months in advance and how do they spend their time off work? By living donkey for a bit. Going in the sea. Once. Never doing wretching. Actually, like them. I bet proper Romanies don’t decorate their it again. Your dog going mental and drinking gallons of I swear blind I saw a …that you can’t wear until you go on caravans with mank won off the prize bingo, though. I’m seawater, only for him to piss it out his arse while you’re Cockle Man on Pelham holiday, in order to convince other also pretty convinced they have better sanitary facilities trying to chat some girl up. Street the other night, people that you’re not fl eabags. than a piss-bucket shared by three generations in the but I might have been How twisted was that? I remember middle of the night. Still, when you’re a kid, caravans are 7. Eating fi sh and chips twice a day for a week. hallucinating. when I was six, and I had to spend ace, and miles better than B&Bs, which only posh people three whole months staring at an from West Bridgford stay in. You wonder why houses I’m sorry, but I’ve been to Blackpool and the chips there 11. Finding some absolutely skill Kung Fu pants and don’t have fold-up beds too. It’s always so dignifi ed, how were rubbish. Skegness has the best chippies in the suitable tat for vest set in the drawer that I was not the people who have just moved out have left enough tea world, and I’ll fi ght anyone who dares say otherwise. your Nana. allowed to wear. It was agonising. bags in the pot for a proper mash. That street in Skeg known as Chip Shop Alley, I could Naturally, as soon as you get to Skeg, every just stand there all day and inhale its delightfully pungent Now it’s getting near the end youth from Notts is wearing the same clothes, 4. Children’s rooms in pubs. aromas. If you don’t put on at least two stone while of the week, you’ve got to making it look like there’s only one shop in you’re there, you’ve had a shit holiday. make sure your Nana gets the whole of town. Honestly, you tell people This must be the best thing about Skeggy by far. Normally, some return on the investment in the South about things like this and they’re going to the pub with your family meant sitting in the 8. Amusement arcades. she stuck in your piggy bank, convinced you’re taking the piss. car for two hours with the occasional bag of crisps and or she’ll have a face like a a Coke with a straw in it, playing Mastermind with your Once upon a time, before the Atari 2600 came out and smacked arse until Christmas. 2. The journey there sister and seeing if there were any wank mags in Nottingham didn’t have the kind of place where Zammo What bounty there was to your Dad’s toolbox. Not in Skeg, though, fi rstrst got intointo scag, scag, you’ll you’ll remember remember Skeggy Skeggy was was choose from: Hunks of rock …which was a yearly novelty in itself. Remember, you had a whole room to yourself, which the place to get youryour low-techlow-tech interactiveinteractive jollies. artfully moulded to look like a in those days Dads never drove you to school, usually contained a bust Air Hockey table, The absolute highlight of the week for full English breakfast, coasters and Mams weren’t allowed to drive. Ever. Sadly, some kind of animal ride with an ‘Out Of me was legging it into an arcade and with photos of people in ‘Frankie there were no Playstations and tellies attached Order’ sign and a Space Invader cabinet seeing what I was going to spunk the Say’ T-Shirts playing crazy golf to the seats, your Dad won’t let you open the with some other game in it. That wwasas brokbroke.e. contents of my piggy bank on that or postcards that gave you an window, he hasn’t got one of them things that Still, it w wasas an in invaluablevaluable introduction to pub year. I bet I still have my name on a erection even though you didn’t hang off the back bumper to stop car sickness, etiquette, as youyou sat on youryour Dad’sDad’s knee while Sheriff Nintendo cabinet in the storeroom of a chip quite know why! you’re wedged up against a suitcase and your he saidsaid ‘Quick,‘Quick, whilewhile landlord’s landlord’ snot not looking’ looking’ shop near the prom. YourYour Mam would alwaysalways moan sister on the back seat, Dad’s put on his Elvis and tippedtipped halfhalf aa pint pint of of Shippos Shippos down down the the about yyouou should be getting some fresh air,air, but seeing Sadly, the numerous tack shops in tape and you’re sitting there knowing he’s front ofof youryour bestbest shirt. shirt. Obviously, Obviously the, the spirit spirit as she livedlived in the PrizePrize Bingo next door rammingramming in Skeg have moved with the times going to start roaring when Old Shep comes of the Children’Children’ss RoomRoom liveslives on in all inner-cityinner-city 10p after 10p10p,, she waswas talking out her arse. and the grandparent market has on (because he always does), and you’re Nottingham pubs, especially in Bulwell. been completely marginalised. Last starting to get that familiar catch down the 9. Going to Butlins for the day. time I went, one could purchase a back of your throat that means in about 5. Meeting people from Sheffi eld. set of Rasta garden gnomes, who three minutes, you’re going to be puking We went to Skeggy Butlins one year. It was bob. The were all sucking on enormous spliffs, your ring into a Co-Op bag while your Dad This was a rather special thrill on its own. Skegness wasn’t only thing about it I can remember is being able to stick an indoor skull fountain, a garden gently says “Fucking kids…you can stay at only occupied by Nottinghamians during the summer my hand through the hole in the wall under my bed and ornament of two fi sts adorned with your bastard Nana’s next year”. (even though you were bound to see at least two kids shake hands with the lad next door. Much better to go in sovereign rings, giving the fi nger and a On the upside, there is nothing more from your school while you were there). Mansfi eld, Derby for the day, have a go on everything (which you could do dildo on sale for a quid. If I had bought cosmopolitan that hearing Radio Trent and Leicester also represented, but it seemed like every in a day, in any case), and piss off out again. my nana any of those items, I would fade out and Radio Lincolnshire fade in. steel mill in Sheffi eld had decamped to the coast. You have been cut out of her will. That’s when you know you’re on your couldn’t understand a word they were saying, they all had 10. The Cockle Man. holiday. basin cuts, they were built like brick shithouses, and they 12. Going home. always wanted to give you bone-crushing handshakes. The bloke in the white coat who used to go round the 3. The caravan. Especially the women. pubs and clubs at night with a big basket of things in A bit like getting there, only with more Mr Kipling trays, who used to get your grandparents all vomiting. This is how fucked up Nottingham Mams 6. The beach. excited while they were watching someone who came in and Dads are; they spend the whole 4th during an episode of New Faces murdering the oeuvre year moaning about The innocent time when you were proud to say you got of Neil Diamond. You look at these things now and think ‘gyppos’ crabs while you were on holiday. Finding the spot where that Chinese lads died for something that looks like a diddling you buried 10p last year, tumour, that you have to put loads of vinegar on so them 16 www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5

Out&About BARS/GYMS/RESTAURANTS/SHOPS

In a newish regular feature, LeftLion whips out the credit card and wallows in the retail wonderland that is Nottingham. Our correspondent, looking nervously at the unopened Barclaycard bill on the mantlepiece, is Cristina Chapman.

GYM: HOLMES PLACE RESTAURANT: BLUU

Oh how the other half live. Bluu celebrated its fourth Holmes Place is awash with birthday in May, with a special money. Well that’s what the collection £35-a-head seven-course menu, free of Porsche, Mazdas, Mercedes and cocktail hour and party. For the night, Audis in the car park would have you the restaurant designed a menu that believe. But don’t let that put you off! would show off Britain’s adoption of This is a great place to work out. The world cuisine while using as many local quality of the equipment, expert class ingredients as possible. instructors and seriously fit personal The first course was asparagus veloute trainers lay testimony to this, but if you with truffle oil. These delicious drips need more proof, just look at the members. of velvet were cheekily served in an Although on the surface this place appears espresso cup. I’d like to think this was to be just about image, Holmes Place and well planned, with a sauna and the chef’s poetic nod to dining etiquette, members are passionate about sport and steam room around the shower area. stimulating the tastebuds with a thimble fitness and want a quality, convenient The showers lead neatly through to the of delicate veloute. On the other hand, environment to practice in. Most of them swimming area which, though not the it could just have been a cheap way of enthusiast. are finely toned and are very committed largest we have seen, is a calming place serving asparagus soup. The icing on the cake? An inspired iced to their sport, be that swimming, track, to do lengths (strictly no diving though). There were more delights to come Johnnie Walker Gold chaser. The tipple cycling, body pump, circuits or yoga. This gym itself has everything you with a full-bodied beef carpaccio. The is aimed at people who like drinking Which brings us to Danielle Feurtado, could want and is an all-round winner. beef was reared locally, very tender whisky at ice temperature, but who one of the best yoga teachers in town. An In fact, if anything is going to stop you but a little insipid. However, the strong don’t want to dilute the purity of the expert in Astanga, Danielle will astound from enjoying it, it will be the prices. rocket and tangy Parmesan provided taste. you with her flexibility and fitness levels, Sometimes, budgets just won’t justify or the kick it needed for a rounded taste. Bluu is great for a complete dinner- but always makes a beginner feel at home. allow the £62 a month (peak) or £53 per They followed this with a creative to-club night out with friends, but if Her classes take place in a dedicated month (off-peak) membership fees. If you lemon and ciroc vodka granita. Poured you’re a couple with an occasion to space for holistic activities, which also are tempted, get down there by the end of over finely crushed ice and lemon, it celebrate, it might not be special or include Hatha yoga, tai chi and pilates. June, because until then they are waiving was surprisingly pleasant way to clean intimate enough. Hamming the meal The gym also has a ladies-only section, the equally steep £120 joining fee. the palette. up with their jazz lounge tunes, Notts a large open-plan floor for the machines The main course was a little band Mood Indigo took the place from and weights, a large area for stretching disappointing given the standard of its usual cool atmosphere to a warmer, and two dancehalls for classes. The Holmes Place, London Road, Nottingham, the previous dishes. Salmon is always a rosy hue throughout. Their appearance changing rooms are spacious, clean 0115 388 4747. www.holmesplace.com satisfying meal, but it has to be really was also the launch of Bluu’s new special to stand out from your own Wednesday jazz nights. cooking. However, the crème brulee, chocolate sorbet, truffles and coffee Bluu, 5 Broadway, Hockley, Nottingham, that followed would delight any dessert 0115 950 5359. www.bluu.co.uk BAR: BROWNES

Brownes bar by day is a SHOP: GENERAL STORE relaxed and civilized affair, with a good range of beers General Store is a discreet and refreshing cocktails to little shop on Mansfield Road, the mull over as you meet your mates. type you could walk by a hundred The interior is contemporary yet times without ever realising the comfortable with high ceilings and delights inside. Once in, however, it’s dark wooden floorboards. A large sepia guaranteed that you’ll spend a few photograph adorns the wall behind the minutes browsing through their selection bar and gives the place the likeable feel of quality intercontinental teas, coffees of a smoky New Orleans jazz joint. and chocolates. Their lunch menu offers everything From the delicious and refreshing from speciality sausages with mash Sencha Sakura (green tea with cherry At night Brownes becomes much and gravy, to a good choice of salads, blossom) to a range of guest chocolates more lively with DJs, loud music pasta dishes and sandwiches. All of from Lindt and Sprengli, the place is and usually a good amount of flesh these are priced between five and packed full of ideas for unusual presents on display. The bar is really geared nine pounds and are served fresh from for friends or treats for yourself. The towards an upbeat atmosphere and and get a delivery to your door. The the open kitchen. The evening menu selection of ground coffees and beans is herein lies its schizophrenic nature. customer service is excellent and their serves an eclectic mix of world tapas, particularly worth of investigation and Whether you’re after a banging night passion for what they do guarantees you including bang bang chicken (£3.60) store owner, Graham Knight is always out or simply a feast of bangers and a quality flavour. In truth the place is and falafels with pitta (£3.20). It’s well pleased to let you sample a few before mash, this place is always an option. really anything but a ‘general store’. worth ordering several of these. Two or you decide upon your purchase. three each among a few of you offers a If you’re too lazy to make the trip into General Store, 570 Mansfield Road. varied and tasty selection. Dessert has a Sherwood, you can even browse a range Brownes Bar & Kitchen, 17-19 Goosegate, Sherwood NG5 2FS, 0115 969 2300 homely feel with sticky toffee pudding of goods on their website, order online and chocolate cake like your mum makes. Nottingham NG1 1FE, 0115 958 0188 www.periodlife.com www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 17

Notts New COMING TO A CITY CENTRE NEAR YOU...

Charidee Normally we wouldn’t celebrate the demise The collection includes photography, pop Oxfam Books & Music, 12 Central Avenue, of an outdoor pursuit shop, where hours art, oils on canvas and prints. They also West Bridgford. 0115 982 6951 can be spent planning and equipping for sell greetings cards and offer a picture the next boarding, camping, biking or framing service. If you haven’t made it climbing trip. Especially not when the staff down those stairs yet, make a mental note Start as you mean to go on? were so useful and would indulge you by to go next time you are passing. Saturday listening to stories of the time you reached 11 June could be a perfect opportunity as This is a cute new addition to the G-force on your ten-year-old GT down a 90- the gallery is holding an auction. Mansfield Road choice of fayre and degree gradient in the Austrian Alps etc. deserves patronage. Opened just a But the good news for girls is that it’s Manhattan Gallery 8 Flying Horse Walk, few weeks ago, the owners provide an been replaced by a Molton Brown shop. Nottingham, 0115 941 8916 interesting, if not bemusing, selection of Expensive, luxurious toiletries that you European and Indian cuisine. If a Malabar would normally only get your hands on if The new black? Jhinga curry doesn’t take your fancy, and you were a) misbehaving in Harrods, b) you couldn’t stomach another plate of on a work jolly, being put up in a spanking This label can go spaghetti or Hungarian goulash, then how hotel or c) going out with a member of the West Bridgford has a few stereotypes either way. It is does Lobster Thermidor grab you? Henley Regatta set. Is Nottingham the new attached to it, but a top Nottingham either hijacked by Believe it or not though, even with such London? shopping destination is not one of them the haircut 100 an eclectic mix of food, the two dishes we (unless you are looking for that revived crew working in tried were lovingly prepared, professionally Molton Brown, 21 St Peters Gate, market town feel). Out of a local charity every high-street served, tasty and cheap. That’s pretty Nottingham. shop culture, however, a little gem has shop in the city or, good going in our experience of chance been cut in the Oxfam Books and Music worn sparingly, visits. So a thumbs up for this small, family- Shop. it keeps its 1970s run enterprise. We hope it does well and This is an Aladdin’s cave of paperback tennis retro integrity continues to provide the personable service writers, coffee table works and non-fiction. and becomes a it has started out with. Gotham Gallery In a relatively small space Oxfam has choice item in your crammed a remarkable collection - all from The Manhattan Gallery has one of the wardrobe. However local public donations. In fact, the shop has Deva, 19 Mansfield Road, Nottingham. most visible positions in the Flying Horse you choose to buy just taken delivery of 300 vinyl records, all Walk, but it still takes most people years Fred Perry, the shop in tip-top condition. to actually step inside the place. This is is worth a visit. Upstairs, you can flick through vinyl, As good as a rest? a shame, given that it has one of the best For the girls, there CD and music scores as though you were collections of 20th and 21st century art are tennis dresses, in Selectadisc. There’s a listening post outside London. skirts and t-shirts for 33s and 45s and a stereo in the corner The owner, Rosemary Pearson, is a New to bag, in pastel yellows and pinks, bottle for tapes and CDs. Staff have unearthed a Yorker who originally came to Britain after greens and royal blues. There’s a fine range gramophone that volunteer Marjorie will falling in love with a Nottingham man. of stripy tank tops and polo shirts to be had play when she comes in on Tuesday and Having spent pretty much her whole life too. For the boys, the zip-ups come in every Saturday mornings. in art galleries she decided to open one colour, as do the polo shirts. There are also Unlike the usual charity shop book and herself. “There was nothing like this in the bags, shoes, belts, hats and shirts. But music frenzy, everything is categorised, UK at the time,” she says. Thirteen years remember the green dress code, stop, look alphabetised and ordered. A librarian’s on, it is still going strong, showcasing the and listen to your inner style guru. dream maybe, but it makes it easy to find work of contemporary local artists. out if they have that elusive book or album They have hundreds of catalogues of 20th Fred Perry, 48 – 50 Bridlesmith Gate, you have been searching for. century prints and serigraphs to browse. Nottingham.

Notts Landing #2: Woodthorpe Park There’s a place in every city where you just want to be. Whether you want to people-watch or think about the good Way, way back in the day, job interviews, tens of days’ work and times, everyone’s place is different. Each issue, a member When snow fell heavy so much time in education as to prohibit of the LeftLion crew explains the spot they like best… And schooling gave way to play, my ever following a career in academia. John Ketley would wag a finger and say: A strict man, who tried to instil a strong No unnecessary driving today! work ethic in his children, often behaving …Yeah, well, bollocks John, as if we were his employees rather than I aint staying in Calverton! his offspring, dad was blissfully and In search of the ultimate sledging thrill, tragically unaware that all of his hard work I’ll get mum’s car up Georges Hill, was instantly undone the very first time I’m gonna get to Woody Park he took me to my own personal Mecca of And when I get there I shall lark playing, Woodthorpe Park, where the big About like a world champion boys sledge. Cos’ Woody Park’s the place for fun. Shell Oil, the Tories, or whoever you If ever a twelve-year-old had a legitimate blame for the lack of white play stuff of excuse for ‘twocking’ a car and wintertime, have failed to knock Woody attempting to make his way, in the most Park off its perch. Proving itself once and hazardous conditions, along one of the for all as the number one Notts venue for most undulating, meandering roads in energetic dossing, it has excelled in recent Nottinghamshire, then that would have summers as a Frisbee-playing arena and an been it. unrivalled headers and volleys spot.

My father must be held at least partly Sprinkle my ashes there, anywhere responsible for my seasonal delinquency, downwind of the dog shit bin. a condition which still affects me today and has, thus far, caused me to miss three Jem Shaw listings... comedy/clubs/theatre/live music/exhibitions Nottingham Voices Things People have said on the leftlion forum words: Jared Wilson photos: Kevin Lake Best Beer Gardens In Town Just Joking...

There are a couple of cool bars near the Corner- Darrel Martin has been annual Big Value Comedy Show at If you could get any comedian, house, in the bit between the cinema and the Works running Just The Tonic the Edinburgh festival. We caught live or dead, at JTT who would (although you have to shuffle along after each drink up with him to see what makes him it be? to catch the sun). The Peacock in Lenton has an comedy club on Sunday laugh… outside bit, as does the Three Wheatsheaves on nights for a decade now. I’d like to have been able to get Derby Rd (complete with a tree house swingy-thing). In that time he’s had acts dlex Take us back to those early Steve Martin when he was funny. like Ricky Gervais, Peter days at JTT. As a former English At the moment I’d love to be able to Fashion Café, although you have to sit on a slope! Kay, Jo Brand, Ross Noble teacher, how did you end up book Chris Rock. I keep trying for The Castle’s really nice as well. There’s a great roof and Johnny Vegas through doing this..? Eddie Izzard and got very close to terrace out the back of the Sir John Borlaise. his doors, entertaining a preview for his last tour. I reckon sundaygirl Nottingham punters. I always loved comedy. English we’ll have him next time (get on teaching was not a choice. I fell into our email list). Maybe also Tommy The Lion in Basford! Superb beer and wicked beer Also a successful comedian in his it by being one of those people that Cooper, Peter Cook or Spike garden. One of Nottingham’s best kept secrets! Don’t own right, Martin was a finalist in fell out of university in the early 90s Milligan. tell anybody! Saltwater is surprisingly amazing and when there was a recession on. will be even better during the summer, expensive but the 1997 Daily Telegraph Awards Before that I was a cellar man and What opportunities do you certainly impressive. where, in his words, “I fucked it Pete Spectrum up”. Since then he has supported glass collector at Venus. I’d got into provide for local comedians in Johnny Vegas and Ed Byrne on comedy clubs whilst in Birmingham the Notts area? The Lion is great, apart from squealing tram wheels... national tour and also runs the and came to Nottingham and found I like the Canalhouse but it tends to get a bit towny. there was a gap. I wanted to see it We have an open spot that anyone Fellows Morton Clayton. They both give a good view here so I started a club. It was the can come along to give it a go. of young scrotes coming out of court after being lack of opportunity that pushed me That’s on our usual Sunday night. caught apple scrumping. towards it... I tried running a new act night a SisterSledgehammer few years ago, but it was difficult Tell us about the Tsunami benefit to get an audience and the same Bar Humbug is coolio, nice little courtyard ting. gig you did. I heard it raised a lot faces kept turning up to do the Worst is the Grovesnor, unless you wanna sit in a car of money for charity. slots. There wasn’t enough local park on Mansfield Road. talent to keep the gig interesting theonelikethe Yes! We raised loads. It was so I dropped it. I might have The Dragon in the city centre has a nice, rather reduced a little when we realised another bash if enough people are unique (think Adobe and Mondrian) terrace… that the tax man still wanted his interested though… kayonbee share, but it was a cracking night. Daniel Kitson was his usual silly Who are the best upcoming local self. We also had Men in Coats, acts in Nottingham? Toby Foster and a load of other Nottingham’s Best Noises acts. We had a bloke turn up Matt Forde was always good, to help, who turned out to be a but he stopped for a while. Pete The knock of the pizza delivery bloke! contortionist, so we let him go on. Bennett is very funny. Jamie Barnze Bizarre. It was a great night and I’d Mathison is a regular on the circuit like to thank the hotels and shops and then of course there’s Darrell The Sherriff shouting “Grrrr” as Robin Hood runs that provided raffle prizes. Martin (I’ve supported Johnny off with his bag of tax money to redistribute to the Vegas on tour don’t you know). impoverished citizens. mrgeesbigcircus It must be hard for an independent comedy club What’s your idea of a good night The grinding, rumbling Booonnnnnnnggggggg of the competing against a national out in Nottingham? tram as you turn onto Noel Street from Asda and see chain like Jongleurs? the signs in all the front windows saying ‘The tram I’ve got kids and am boring now. bell has made my life a living hell!’ It is a bit annoying when you try I do like a bit of drinking, bowling, floydy to promote and people say ‘is that laughing, dancing in a drunken Jongleurs?’ Especially when Just fashion to a bit of Northern Soul How’s about the sound of Notts Chief of Police Steve the Tonic has been bringing the in the Social. As I tend to do gigs Green shirking his responsibilities? likes of Johnny Vegas, Ross Noble, around the country I’ve lost touch BassRooster Daniel Kitson, Jimmy Carr, Peter with Nottingham nightlife a bit. Kay, Al Murray and loads of others I realised I was old when I was The deafening sound of ruffling shell suits emanating from St Ann’s. to the city. It is quite difficult to walking from Wagamamas through Pisces J promote in Nottingham, especially town and refused to go through the now they’ve clamped down on fly- city centre. I get a bit nervous when The A-Block at the city ground. postering. I think that affected a I see big gangs of lads all shouting onthebridge lot of smaller promoters. The real their heads off. Most people are difference is that Just the Tonic is OK, even when they are drunk, The man standing outside the Victoria Centre at run for the love of comedy. but it just takes one dickhead in 7:45am every day handing out the Metro saying a group to make violence erupt. I “Good Morning... Good Morning... Good Morning...” Who are the best acts you’ve had hate dickheads He just keeps on saying it, exactly the same way, at the club over the last decade? every day. He’s the best of the Metro people. What stuff have you got coming sundaygirl My favourite will always be Johnny up this summer? The sound of the Garvey when you get to the top of Vegas. His early live performances the stairs. were legendary. When he’s back We’ve got a load of events at El Chupacabra gigging (which is coming about Nottingham Castle. You can see soon) and he gets back in his stride, Daniel Kitson, Rob Newman, John we should be in for some more Hegley, Men in Coats, Will Smith nuttiness. Sean Lock is my favourite and more. We’ve also got the usual scripted comedian, Ross Noble is Sunday night madness at Cabaret! great. Daniel Kitson. Rich Hall, Al make your voice heard Murray, Dylan Moran, Alan Davies, www.justthetonic.com www.leftlion.co.uk/forum Lee Hurst, Phil Kay, Jo Brand. Not Mark Lamarr. listings... comedy/live music/clubs/exhibitions thu 23/06 sun 10/07 Period of June/July Jongleurs Period of June/July Venue: Jongleurs Price: £8 + Comedy Simon B Cotter, Brendan Riley, Live Music Ian Coppinger, Brendon Burns thu 02/06 Runs Until: 25/6 wed 01/06 Take us back to those early If you could get any comedian, Jongleurs days at JTT. As a former live or dead, at JTT who would Venue: Jongleurs sun 26/06 English teacher, how did you it be? Price: £8 - £15 Times: 7pm Just The Tonic end up doing this..? Brian Higgins, Eddy Brimson, Venue: Cabaret I’d like to have been able to get Noel Britten, Mandy Knight Price: £7 (NUS) I always loved comedy. English Steve Martin when he was funny. Runs Until: 4/6 Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Jason Manfred, Al Pitcher teaching was not a choice. I At the moment I’d love to be able sun 05/06 fell into it by being one of those to book Chris Rock. I keep trying Just The Tonic thu 30/06 people that fell out of University in for Eddie Izzard, and got very Venue: Cabaret The Keith Barret Show - Live the early 90’s when there was a close to a preview for his last tour. Price: £7 (NUS) Jongleurs Venue: Playhouse Venue: Jongleurs Price: £14.50 recession on. Before that I was a I reckon we’ll have him next time Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Phil Nichol, Glenn Wool Price: £8 Times: 8pm cellar man and glass collector at (get on our email list). Maybe also Roger D, Harry Denford, Runs Until: 11/7 Venus. I’d got into comedy clubs Tommy Cooper, Peter Cook or Sean Collins, Rudi Lickwood whilst in Birmingham and came to Spike Milligan. thu 09/06 Runs Until: 2/7 Just The Tonic Venue: Cabaret Nottingham and found there was Jongleurs Venue: Jongleurs fri 01/07 Price: £7 (NUS) a gap. I wanted to see it here so What opportunities do you Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Price: £8 - £15 Yngwie Malmsteen Craig Campbell, Wil Hodgson I started a club. It was the lack provide for local comedians in Times: 7pm Venue: Rock City of opportunity that pushed me the Notts area. Michael Legge, Craig Campbell, With support from Shenker towards it Brendan Dempsey, JoJo Smith thu 14/07 Hinterland We have an open spot that anyone Jongleurs fri 10/06 Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Jongleurs Tell us about the Tsunami can come along and have a go. Jongleurs Hinterland, Dangerlust, Price: £8+ benefit gig you did. I heard it That’s on our usual Sunday night. Venue: Jongleurs ThisIsTheWayTheWorldEnds Mickey Hutton, Ninia Benjamin, Price: £13 - £15 raised quite a lot of money... I tried running a new act night a Junior Simpson, Jim Tavare Times: 7pm OPM few years ago, but it was difficult Runs Until: 16/7 Michael Legge, Toby Foster, Venue: Rock City Yes! We raised loads. It was to get an audience and the same Craig Campbell, Brendan Dempsey Price: £8 adv reduced a little when we realised faces kept turning up to do the Runs Until: 11/6 sun 17/07 Times: 7.30 pm that the tax man still wanted his slots. There wasn’t enough local Just The Tonic sun 12/06 The Five O’Clock Heroes share, but it was a cracking night. talent to keep the gig interesting Venue: Cabaret Venue: The Social Price: £7 Daniel Kitson was his usual silly so I dropped it. I might have Price: £5 Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show self. We also had Men in Coats, another bash if enough people are Richard Herring, Nige Toby Foster and a load of other interested though… Computerman acts. We had a bloke turn up Venue: The Rescue Rooms thu 21/07 Price: £3 to help who turned put to be a Computerman, Kingsize, The Fakers, Just The Tonic Jongleurs contortionist, so we let him go on. Who are the best upcoming The Ambassadors, London Road Venue: The Castle Venue: Jongleurs plus special guests, Hot Club Night DJs Bizzarre. it was a great night and local acts in Nottingham? Price: £11 (NUS) Price: £8+

I’d like to thank the hotels and Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Alex Boardman, Otiz Cannelloni, John Hegley (above) John Moloney, Johnny Candon shops that provided rooms and Matt Forde was always good, Alabama 3 thu 02/06 Runs Until: 23/7 raffle prizes. but he stopped for a while. Pete Venue: The Rescue Rooms Bennett is very funny. Jamie sat 02/07 Price: £12.50 adv Just The Tonic sun 24/07 It must be hard for an Mathison is a regular on the circuit Just The Tonic Venue: Cabaret One Toy Soldier Venue: The Castle Just The Tonic independent comedy club and then of course there’s Darrell Price: £7 (NUS) Venue: Junktion 7 Price: £11 (NUS) Venue: Cabaret competing against a national Martin (I’ve supported Johnny Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Price: £4 (NUS) Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Price: £7 (NUS) Sarah Kendall (above), Rob Rouse Times: 8.30pm - 12am chain like Jongleurs? Vegas on tour don’t you know). Men In Coats, Will Smith, Nige Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show One Toy Soldier, The Attika State Will Smith, Die Clattershenkenfietermaus Chalk Four, Stickers For Kids It is a bit annoying when you try What’s your idea of a good night tue 14/06 Get a Grip tue 26/07 to promote and people say ‘is out in Nottingham? sun 03/07 Venue: The Social 3 Ring Circus that Jongleurs?’ Especially when Just The Tonic fri 03/06 Price: £2 (NUS) Venue: Junktion 7 Just the Tonic has been bringing I’ve got kids and am boring now. Venue: The Castle Times: 8.30pm Times: 8.30pm - 12am Price: £11 (NUS) the likes of Johnny Vegas, Ross I do like a bit of drinking, bowling, Bethany, Gary Bell, Rob and Skatz, 3 Ring Circus, Lo-Ego, Alex McEwan Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Noble, Daniel Kitson, Jimmy Carr, laughing, dancing in a drunken Damion Larkin, John Wallace, Daniel Kitson Peter Kay, Al Murray and loads fashion to a bit of Northern Soul Paul Howard, Austin Caruthers Roy De Wired Compere Spiky Mike of others to the city. It is quite in the Social. As I tend to do Venue: Southbank Bar wed 27/07 Price: Free difficult to promote in Nottingham, gigs around the country I’ve lost Times: 8pm - late especially now they’ve clamped touch with Nottingham nightlife Jongleurs thu 16/06 Just The Tonic Venue: The Castle Venue: Jongleurs Dalek down on fly-postering. I think a bit. I realised I was old when I Price: £11 (NUS) Price: £8+ Venue: The Social that affected a lot of smaller was walking from Wagamamas Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Ian Moore, Kevin McCarthy, Keith Dover Price: £7 adv Darrell Martin has been running Rob Newman promoters. The real difference is through town and refused to go Runs Until: 18/6 Times: 7pm - 10pm Just The Tonic comedy club in that Just the Tonic is run for the through the city centre. I get a bit Nottingham for a decade now. love of comedy. nervous when I see big gangs of Just The Tonic thu 28/07 Castle Bartok Venue: Cabaret Style: Opera In that time he’s had acts like lads all shouting there heads off. Jongleurs Price: £9 (NUS) Venue: Royal Centre Ricky Gervais, Peter Kay, Jo Most people are OK, even when Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Venue: Jongleurs Who are the best acts you’ve they are drunk, but it just takes Daniel Kitson Price: £8+ Brand, Ross Noble and Johnny Tony Gerrard, Trevor Crook, one dickhead in a group to make sat 03/06 Vegas through his doors, had at the club over the last Martin Davis, Gavin Webster violence erupt. I hate dickheads entertaining punters at the Old decade? sun 19/06 Just The Tonic Runs Until: 30/7 Venue: Cabaret Vic and now Cabaret. My favourite will always be Johnny What stuff have you got coming Price: £7 (NUS) Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show sun 31/07 Vegas. His early live performances up this summer? Also a successful comedian in his Dave Fulton, Dan Nightingale (above) were legendary. When he’s back own right, Martin was a finalist in gigging again (which is coming We’ve got a load of events at the 1997 Daily Telegraph Awards thu 07/07 about soon) and he gets back Nottingham Castle. You can see where, in his words, “I fucked it in his stride, we should be in for Daniel Kitson, Rob Newman , John up”. Since then he has supported some more nuttiness. Sean Lock Hegley, Men in Coats, Will Smith Johnny Vegas and Ed Byrne on Jongleurs is my favourite scripted comedian, and more. We’ve also got the Venue: Jongleurs national tour and also runs the Ross Noble is great. Daniel Kitson. usual Sunday night madness at Just The Tonic Price: £8+ Windsor, Craig Hill, Gordon Southern, Just The Tonic annual Big Value Comedy Show at Venue: Cabaret Vixen Rich Hall, Al Murray, Dylan Moran, Cabaret! Steve Hughes Venue: Cabaret the Edinburgh festival. We caught Price: £8 (NUS) Venue: Rock City Alan Davies, Lee Hurst, Phil Kay, Runs Until: 9/7 Price: £7 (NUS) Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Price: £12.50 adv up with him to see what makes Times: 7pm Doors, 8.30pm Show Jo Brand. Not Mark Lamarr. www.justthetonic.com Phil Kay (above), Andy Zaltzman, John Times: 7pm him laugh… Andrew Maxwell, Danny Bhoy Oliver Vixen, Dante Fox, plus support listings... comedy/live music/clubs/theatre/exhibitions Open Hand wed 08/06 Vader tue 14/06 thu 23/06 Period Of June/July Venue: Rock City Venue: Rock City Deck Cheese Package Price: £5 Price: £9 Venue: Rock City Times: 7.30 pm Price: £5 adv Live Music Teratoma Times: 7.30pm Venue: Junktion 7 Trashcan Sinatras Vanilla Pod, Phinius Gage, Route 215 Price: £1 Venue: The Rescue Rooms sat 04/06 Times: 8.30pm - 12am Price: £8 adv The Dead Pets Teratoma, The Rise Of Jupiter Venue: Junktion 7 wed 15/06 Times: 06/23/2005 thu 09/06 The Dead Pets, Kirkz Opera North - Nabucco Enjoy The Ride Venue: Royal Centre Cut Copy Venue: Malt Cross Cafe Bar Price: £12 - £28.50 Venue: The Social Price: £3 Price: £4 Times: 8.30pm - 11pm Walking Concert Cut Copy, The Presets A crazy collection of quality acts, prepare Venue: Stone to be amused, astonished, educated and Price: £8 above all entertained. fri 24/06 Times: 7.30pm The Ramonas Venue: Junktion 7 thu 16/06 Days Of Worth Times: 9pm - 1am Venue: Rock City The Ramonas, The Smears, Two Day Rule Price: £3 Missy Higgins Dealmaker Records Showcase Venue: The Rescue Rooms Venue: Moog Price: £7 adv Price: Free Times: 7 pm - 10.15 pm Times: 8pm - 12am Usual top-quality HipHop and Breakbeat from Nottingham’s fi nest HipHop label Tori Amos and party collective LeftLion Presents.. The beavers, rats, Venue: Royal Centre crabs and wizards night. Price: £25 fri 17/06 Venue: Malt Cross Cafe Bar Roy De Wired Price: Free Bandsoc BOTB Presents Venue: Southbank Bar Times: 7.30pm - 11pm Venue: Junktion 7 Price: Free The Henry Road And Friends... Times: 8.30pm - 12am Times: 8pm - late The Nutron Stars,We Show Up On Radar Swound, Dragonfl ies Draw Flames, Foremost Clothing (new vids/support) Panda Flipside, Metro Joe One Night of Elvis DJ Rattomatic, The Pete Box Venue: Royal Centre Metemphychosis (Films, lights, effects) The Mae Shi Price: £15.50 - £16.50 Venue: The Social Elton John fri 10/06 The King is in the building. The Robert Cray Band Price: £5 adv Venue: Nottingham Arena Venue: Royal Centre Times: 7pm - 10pm Price: £32.50 Price: £22.50 The Mae Shi, Rapider Than Horsepower,mon 14/02 sat 18/06 Truth Tera:Tora Roy De Wired Venue: Southbank Bar Patty Griffi n Venue: Southbank Bar Price: Free Venue: The Rescue Rooms Price: Free Times: 8pm - late Price: £13 adv Hazy Malaze sun 05/06 Times: 8pm - late Venue: The Rescue Rooms Maria McKee Black Mountain Price: £10 adv Spear Of Destiny Venue: The Rescue Rooms Venue: The Social Featuring Neal Casal and Jeff Hill Venue: Junktion 7 Price: £13.50 adv Price: £5 adv (Rufus Wainwright Band) Times: 9pm - 1am Times: 7pm - 10.15 Times: 7pm - 10pm The Rolling Clones Unplugged The Queers The Rolling Clones Venue: Southbank Bar sat 11/06 Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Southbank Bar Price: Free Price: £6 adv £7 otd Price: Free Times: 8pm - late Eels Times: 9pm - 1am Times: 8pm - late Venue: Royal Centre The Queers, Dead By Gun, The Atoms The Chinese Stars Price: £15 Gods Chosen Dealers Venue: Cabaret Times: 7.30pm Venue: Junktion 7 Price: £4 adv £5 otd sun 19/06 Jeff Klein Price: £5 Venue: The Social Times: 9pm - 1am The Funky Way Price: £5 adv Funeral For A Friend mon 06/06 Venue: Southbank Bar Marc Carrol Venue: Rock City sat 25/06 Price: Free Insision Times: 8pm - late Flogging Molly Venue: Rock City tue 07/06 Venue: Rock City Black Rebel Motorcycle Club Price: £10 adv Showstoppers Concert Ozric Tentacles Venue: The Rescue Rooms Times: 7.30pm Venue: Nottingham Arts Theatre Venue: The Rescue Rooms Price: £14 adv Price: £7 Price: £12.50 adv. mon 20/06 Times: 7pm 65 Days Of Static The Mutts Damn You! Presents Venue: Rock City Venue: The Rescue Rooms Summer XS Venue: Bunkers Hill Inn Price: £5 adv Price: £5 adv Venue: Nottingham Arena Price: £4 adv £5 otd Times: 8.30pm Price: £13.50 + bf Times: 8.30pm Daniel Bedingfi eld, Rooster, Lucie Silvas A Hawk And A Hacksaw, Jones Of Colorado tue 21/06 Guitar Gangsters Once In A Lifetime Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Nottingham Arena Carl Stanley’s Funky Family Underoath Price: £5 Price: £36.50 adv Venue: Southbank Bar Venue: Rock City Times: 9pm - 1am Price: Free Price: £7.50 Guitar Gangsters, Paul Carter, The Ponys Times: 8pm - late Times: 7 pm Resistance 77 Venue: The Social Price: £5 adv Pillowtalk A Scarlet Ace Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Rock City sun 12/06 The Fab 4 wed 22/06 Times: 9pm - 1am Price: £5 Venue: Southbank Bar Jimmy Eat World With support from Enter Shikari Price: Free Venue: Rock City sun 26/06 Times: 8pm - late Sage Francis Public Display Of Affection Venue: The Rescue Rooms wed 08/06 Commuter And The Last Pedestrians Venue: The Old Angel Price: £7.50 adv Kevin Mark Trail Venue: Moog Public Display Of Affection, Times: 7pm - 10.15pm Venue: The Rescue Rooms Price: £2 The Dodgems Culprit, Black Lodge, With support from Grand Buffet Price: £7 adv Times: 8pm - 12am Valhalla, Chicago Green Rescheduled Show Roy De Wired Octavepussy Venue: Southbank Bar Brian McFadden mon 13/06 Venue: Moog Price: Free Venue: Royal Centre Styx Price: £4 Times: 8pm - late Price: £21.50 Venue: Rock City Times: 8pm - 12am Brian has now split from both his family Price: £17.50 Live P-Funk band from Holland, fi rst time and Westlife. Come and see his one man Times: 7.30pm in Nottingham, Their new album feaures ‘crap’ show. members of the JB’s and Parliament / Funkadelic listings... comedy/live music/clubs/theatre/exhibitions sun 26/06 The Selecter fri 01/07 Beyond All Reason sat 09/07 Swimming fri 22/07 Dark Salvation 3 Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Rock City Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Rock City Times: 9pm - 1am Price: £4 Times: 9pm Price: £7 adv £8 otd The Selecter, Gazebo Times: 3pm - 11pm Les Georges Leningrad sat 23/07 All dayer Dark salvation Gothic Roy De Wired Venue: The Social HeadHungLow Alternative festival (Basement room) Venue: Southbank Bar Price: £4 Venue: Junktion 7 Pro-jekt, Avoidance of Doubt, Sinnergod, Price: Free The Show Is Rainbow Times: 9pm - 1am Moriarti and the sith, Lupine, Neon zoo Times: 8pm - late The Richie Muir Band mon 27/06 sat 02/07 sun 10/07 Venue: Southbank Bar Andy Williams Stars in Their Eyes The Fab 4 Price: Free Venue: Royal Centre Venue: Royal Centre Venue: The Social Times: 8pm - late Price: £27.50 - £30 Price: £15.50 - £17 Price: Free Times: 8pm - late INME Bleeding Through Venue: Rock City Venue: Rock City Unsane mon 11/07 Price: £7.50 Price: £10 adv Venue: Rock City Times: 7.30pm Times: 7.30 pm Enjoy The Ride Price: £9 adv Venue: Malt Cross Cafe Bar Times: 7pm sun 24/07 Kokolo Price: £3 Roy De Wired Venue: Moog Times: 8.30pm - 11pm tue 12/07 Venue: Southbank Bar Price: £2 A crazy collection of quality acts, prepare Jackson United Price: Free Times: 8pm - 12am to be amused, astonished, educated and Venue: Rock City Times: 8pm - late The return of the awesome New York above all entertained. My Awsome Compilation Afro-funk band fresh from Glastonbury! tue 26/07 Double Cross Dance Disaster Movement tue 28/06 Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: The Social Nuclear Assult Times: 9pm - 1am Venue: Rock City Double Cross, Deadline wed 13/07 Price: £12 adv Battle Of The Bands Times: 7.30pm Chill in the park Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: The Arboretum Times: 8.30pm Blue Price: Free Venue: Nottingham Arena Times: 1pm - 5pm Insomnium thu 14/07 Price: £25 Venue: Rock City Times: 7pm The Barry Lee Band Price: £8.50 Venue: Southbank Bar Times: 6pm El Viaje Misterioso de Kevlua Price: Free Venue: Moog Times: 8pm - late Dead Souls Price: Free Venue: Junktion 7 Times: 8pm - 12am sun 03/07 Times: 9pm - 1am The Rolling Clones Chromeo Venue: Southbank Bar Juan Maclean Editors Venue: The Social Price: Free Venue: The Social Venue: The Social Price: £5 adv Times: 8pm - late Price: £5 Price: £7 David Gilmour Girls The Dead 60’s tue 05/07 Venue: The Rescue Rooms Mistys Big Adventure fri 15/07 Price: £7 adv Venue: The Social Roy De Wired The Yards wed 27/07 Kooks Price: £5 adv Venue: Southbank Bar Venue: The Social Price: Free Price: £5 adv wed 29/06 Fastlane thu 07/07 Times: 8pm - late M.I.A Venue: Rock City Battle Of The Bands Venue: The Rescue Rooms Price: £5 adv The Vibrators Venue: Junktion 7 Price: £9.50 adv Times: 7.30pm Venue: Junktion 7 Times: 8.30pm Fastlane, Echofreddy Times: 9pm - 1am thu 30/06 Adequate 7 Battle Of The Bands sat 16/07 Howards Alias thu 28/07 Venue: Rock City Venue: Junktion 7 Michelle Shocked Venue: Rock City Price: £6 adv Times: 8.30pm Venue: The Rescue Rooms Price: £6 Times: 7.30 pm Price: £15 adv Times: 7 pm fri 08/07 Times: 7pm The Filaments, Sonic Boom Six, Amos Lee The Lovers Grown At Home Venue: The Rescue Rooms Venue: Junktion 7 Sticky Morales Price: £8 adv Times: 9pm - 1am Venue: Southbank Bar Team Price: Free Venue: Junktion 7 Finch Leaves Times: 8pm - late Times: 8.30pm Venue: Rock City Venue: The Social Ten Piece funk and soul band Price: £11.50 Price: £5 adv The Rocks Times: 7pm Outcryfi re / Evil Scarecrow Venue: The Social Roy De Wired Venue: Rock City Rilo Kiley Venue: Southbank Bar Price: £5 Venue: The Social Price: Free Roy De Wired fri 29/07 Price: £8 adv Times: 8pm - late Midnight Confi guration Venue: Southbank Bar Times: 7.30pm Venue: Junktion 7 Price: Free sat 09/07 Times: 9pm Times: 8pm - late A Is For Ape Venue: Junktion 7 mon 18/07 Price: £3.50 adv Big Track Presents Times: 8.30pm - 12am Venue: The Social sat 30/07 A Is For Ape, Chuck, Crazy Fire Yellas, Price: £1 Carl Stanley’s Funky Family Wagstaffe Times: 8pm - 12am Venue: Southbank Bar The Henry Road Price: Free fri 01/07 Times: 8pm - late wed 20/07 Roll Out The Barrel Teenage Casket Company Venue: Royal Centre Venue: Junktion 7 Price: £10 Price: £6 Hellset Orchestra Album Launch Times: 8.30pm - 12am Venue: The Rescue Rooms Battle Of The Bands Teenage Casket Company, Silverjet Nottinghams most bizzare and eccentric Venue: Junktion 7 The Wild Roses, Headrush rockers have fi nally got into the studio Times: 8.30pm and are about to release their tunes on the unsuspecting and the faithfull... thu 21/07 sun 31/07 Check out their interviewon page 11. The Fab 4 The Friction Venue: Southbank Bar Kings of Leon Illuminatus Venue: Junktion 7 Price: Free Venue: Nottingham Arena Venue: Junktion 7 Times: 8.30pm Times: 8pm - late Price: £18.50 Times: 9pm - 1am Illuminatus, Humanity, Panic Cell fri 22/07 We’ll Meet Again Josh Rouse Band Venue: Royal Centre Mat Andasun Band Venue: Rock City Price: £7.50 Venue: Junktion 7 Price: £14 adv Times: 9pm - 1am listings... comedy/live music/clubs/theatre/exhibitions fri 03/06 fri 10/06 sat 18/06 Period Of June/July Basement Boogaloo Style: Funktastic Camoufl age Venue: Bar None Style: Hiphop, Breaks Clubs Price: Free Venue: Stealth Times: 10pm - late Price: £6 adv thu 02/06 With residents Nick Shaw & Ed Cotton Times: 10pm - 2.30am Melle Mel & Scorpio (Furious 5), Evil Ed & Demo Rappers Delight Konny Kon, Plan B, Foz, Camo Residents Venue: BluePrint Style: HipHop sat 04/06 Price: £5 Venue: The Social Samyouwell presents ‘Freeks’ Times: 7.30pm - 3am Price: £3 - £4 Venue: Moog Charity night with all profi ts going Times: 10pm - 2am Price: Free towards a different charity each month. Cappo, Karizma, Fever and Squigley on Times: 8pm - 12am Accoustic room, bands room, DJ Room four decks, open mics. and a chillout cafe - Always roadblock, always a wicked vibe. Location sat 11/06 Venue: Oceana Pure Filth Behind the Groove Price: £5 b4 11pm £6 after (NUS) Style: Techno, DnB, Funky House Venue: Moog Times: 10pm - 2.30am Venue: BluePrint Price: £2 Price: £6 Times: 8pm - 12am Firefl y Times: 10pm - late NYC Underground disco, edits and house Style: Techno Rowland The Bastard, Darc March from the Basement Boogaloo crew Nick Venue: Dogma Filth Residents, Agent Smith & Suspect- ‘Shaky’ Shaw & Ed Cotton. Price: £3 1, Planar & Fijjitt, Paul Murphy, Ed Cotton Psycle Times: 9pm - 2am Style: Psychedelic Trance The Wake DJ Extreme Venue: BluePrint Style: Deathrock, Old School Goth Go Go Price: £5 Venue: Spiders Highness SoundSystem Venue: Moog Times: 10pm - late Style: Reggae, Roots Price: Free Vision: Metem Psychosis Venue: BluePrint sun 19/06 Times: 8pm - 12am VJ: Siricom Visual Services Trickster Price: £5 Decor: Aunty Audry, The Techno Venue: Moog Times: 10pm - late Hippy and friends Price: £2 Firefl y Times: 8pm - 12am Style: Techno, Breaks City Of Dog fri 03/06 Venue: The Ballroom Venue: Moog Price: £15 adv £17 otd Price: Free thu 23/06 Times: 10pm - 6am Times: 8pm - 12am Full Metal Racket Orbital DJ set, Phil Hartnol, Venue: Spiders Jon Carter, Technasia - Charles Siegling, Nightmare Times: 9pm - 2am Erol Alkan, Stereo 8 (fi ngerlickin), Style: Goth, Industrial, Cyber Thrash Jelly (Jeet & Max Cooper on 6 Venue: Spiders fri 24/06 dex), Tantrum Spanjj sun 12/06 Venue: Moog sun 05/06 Price: Free Only Luv DJ’s Times: 8pm - 12am Venue: Moog Price: Free Times: 12pm - 12am mon 13/06 Escapade Detonate Venue: Moog Style: DnB, HipHop, Breaks Price: Free Venue: Stealth Times: 8pm - 12am Price: £10 Quality cult fi lms and wild visuals shown Times: 10pm - 4am Spectrum on the big screen. DJackal and Ligres Nickey Blackmarket, Bass Line Smith, Style: Breaks hosting (spinning deep house and Transit Mafi a, Santero, Detail Venue: Stealth smooth grooves) Price: £14 adv KRS1 & Rahzel Times: 10pm - 6am sat 25/06 Style: HipHop You Don’t Stop Bob’s Dynamic Timo Maas (3 Hour Set), General Midi tue 14/06 Venue: Rock City Style: DnBnTing (TCR/Kilowatt), Hexadecimal, Pete Price: £15 El Viaje Misterioso de Kevlua Venue: Moog Jordan, Breakfastaz, Friendly (Fat!), Times: 7.30 pm Venue: Moog Price: Free Phantom Beats (Plastic Raygun), Mike Price: Free Times: 8pm - 12am Hogan (Breakspoll), Quantic Soul Times: 8pm - 12am Moocha presents wig-out acid jungle, Orchestra (Live), Dave Boultbee, DJ S1’s wed 08/06 elektro-dancehall and ting Farewell Gig with DJ S1, Mr Hill and Dom Highness Rafferty thu 16/06 Style: Reggae & Roots The Late Lounge Venue: Moog Sell Out Venue: NG1 Price: Free Venue: Spiders Price: £4 b4 11pm £7 after Dollop Times: 8pm - 12am Times: 9pm - 2am Times: 10pm - 5am Style: HipHop, Breaks, Electronica Venue: Moog Supersystem Price: Free fri 17/06 sun 26/06 Venue: The Social Times: 8pm - 12am Price: £5 adv Only Luv DJ’s Sound Alliance, Koda cola, Left Of The Venue: Moog Dealer (check out the interview on Pink Flamingos Price: Free page 9), Phil Mcsposure, D’Lex, The Style: Rock, Seventies, Eighties Times: 12pm - 12am Steakhouse Venue: Spiders Sleazy RnR, Electro Clash, 70’s - 80’s, Product Spam wed 29/06 Style: Breaks, Tech House, Electronica George Be Tall... Venue: Junktion 7 Venue: Stealth Venue: Moog Price: Free Price: £6 adv - £7 door Price: Free VinylJacks plays ¡S.P.A.M! Sixties - Soul, thu 09/06 Dylan Rhymes (lot 49 / kingsize), Little Times: 8pm - 12am Pop, Psyche, And Mod Mike (phrunky / casa del soul), David Jesse James Josephs (spundae / godskitchen usa), Style: Rock, Indy, Alternative Rez, Iain Mac, Freeman Focus thu 30/06 Venue: Rock City Style: DnB, Funky House Price: £6 adv Venue: BluePrint Times: 7.30pm Kombination Funk Price: £6 (NUS) Style: Dirty DnB, Techno, Breaks Times: 10pm - late Venue: BluePrint Muffl er - two hour set (Moving Shadow / Harder and Faster Price: £5 Urban Takeover), Smyla (Pure Filth), Style: DnB Times: 10 pm - 3.30 am Disfunktion & Jaydan (Propaganda Venue: Moog Skitty (Metalheadz, Renegade Hardware) Recordings), Kronic (Cutz Recordingz ) Price: Free Ben Fawce (Mindrush), Cipher Funktion Timmy Hands (Funktion), J.B (Cutz Times: 8pm - 12am (Disgusting Funk), Lowkey (Brutal), Mark Style: Drum and Bass Recordings), Dizasta, Agent Orange With Stealthy One and guests Jacobs, Macp, Mr Seavers & Friends Venue: Synergy OBI 1, Mc’s G1, Carasel & Sinna, Anger, Price: Free Koop, Panda, JBMC, AEM Soundsystem - Times: 9pm - 2am Deep House, Tech House and Breaks Random Guy, Timmy Hands, Jest-r, The Weasalman listings... comedy/live music/clubs/theatre/exhibitions wed 13/07 fridays tuesdays Period Of June/July Pink Flamingos Booty Bassline House Style: Disco, RnB Style: Rock, Seventies, Eighties Style: House, Deep House Venue: The Market Bar Clubs Venue: Spiders Venue: The Edge Price: £4 (NUS) Sleazy RnR, Electro Clash, 70’s - 80’s, Price: £7 Times: 9pm - 2.30am fri 01/07 Times: 10pm - late Matt Tolfrey and DJ Ellis Location fri 15/07 Audio Venue: Oceana wednesdays Style: Funk, Soul, Disco Price: £5 b4 11pm £6 after (NUS) Venue: Snug Times: 10pm - 2.30am Price: £5 (£3 b4 10.30pm) (NUS) Style: Alternative, Rock, Pop Times: 10pm - 3am Venue: The Cookie Club Basement Boogaloo Price: £2.50 (NUS) Style: Funktastic Atomic Times: 10.30pm - 2am Venue: Bar None Kombination Funk Style: Eighties, Nineties Price: Free Style: Dirty DnB, Techno Venue: The Cookie Club Times: 10pm - late Venue: BluePrint Price: £4 (NUS) thursdays With residents Nick Shaw & Ed Cotton Price: £5 Times: 10.30pm - 2am Times: 10pm - late Thursdays Spectrum Style: Funk, HipHop Style: Breaks saturdays Venue: Market Bar Venue: Stealth sat 16/07 Demo Price: £4 Times: 10pm - 4am Style: Band, Accoustic, DJ’s & Chillout Times: 9pm - 2.30am Adam Freeland Venue: BluePrint With Resident DJ Santero Price: £5 Focus Times: 10pm - late Up the Junction Style: DnB, Funky House Style: Sixties Venue: BluePrint The Wake Venue: The Cookie Club Price: £6 (NUS) Style: Deathrock, Old School Goth Price: £2.50 (NUS) Times: 10pm - 3am Venue: Spiders Stealth vs Rescued Times: 10.30pm - 2am Venue: Stealth sat 02/07 Price: Free b4 10.15pm £5 after Tuned fri 22/07 Times: 5pm - 4am Style: Indy, Alternative, Pop Detonate Two Clubs, Three Bars, Two Patios, Venue: Rock City Style: DnB, HipHop One Cinema, One Price. Bonza! Price: £4 / £3.50 (NUS) Pure Filth Venue: Stealth Times: 8.30pm - 2am Style: Techno, DnB, Funky House Price: £10 Saturdays Venue: BluePrint Times: 10pm - 4am Style: Funky House Nu World Price: £6 Andy C (2 hour set) Venue: The Market Bar Style: HipHop, Funk Times: 10pm - late Price: £5 Venue: Malt Cross Cafe Bar Jerome Hill, Filth Residents, Agent sat 30/07 Times: 9pm - 2.30am Price: Free Smith & Suspect-1, Planar & Fijjitt, Tom With Residents: Dean Marriott, Matt Times: 7pm - 11pm Smokescreen, Paul Murphy, Ed Cotton Tolfrey, Griff, Damian Wells Mirrorball Sy & Seduction Present Funktion Stylus Style: RnB, Disco, Funk Uproar - Colossus Style: Drum and Bass Style: Funky House, Funk Venue: Snug Style: Hardcore, Gabba, Oldschool Venue: Synergy Venue: Snug Price: £3 - £4 (NUS) Venue: Nottingham Arena Price: Free Price: £3 - £6 Times: 10pm - 3am Price: £25 Times: 9pm - 2am Times: 10pm - 3am Times: 9pm - 6am Random Guy, Jest-r, ‘An eclectic mix spanning soulful house, Dogmatic Seduction, Sy & Unknown, Hixxy, Timmy Hands, The Weasalman hip hop, RnB, soul/funk, Drum & Bass, Style: HipHop, Drum and Bass Sharkey Vs CLSM Maximum Impact peppered with old school and party Venue: Dogma Live Showcase, Scott Brown, Breeze & classics’ Price: Various Styles, Producer Vs Drokz, Scorpio Vs sat 30/07 Times: 10pm - 2am Clarkee, M-Zone & Vortex, Stu Allen, The Late Lounge Platinum Ratty, Dougal & MC Magika, DJ Sy, Nicky Venue: NG1 Style: House, Breaks Club NME Blackmarket, Vibes & LiveLee, MC’s Price: £4 b4 11pm £7 after Venue: The Edge Style: Indy, Rock, Alternative Storm, Whizzkid, Rude, Ribbz, Squidgy Times: 10pm - 5am Price: £5 Venue: Stealth B, Impact, Magika, Energy, Connie and Times: 10pm - late Price: £2 / £3 / £4 more!!! Rave O’clock! Weeklies Times: 10pm - 2am Rise and Shine / Funk U thu 07/07 fridays Style: Indy, Alternative Tiger Style Venue: The Cookie Club Pumped Style: Breaks Price: £5 (NUS) Venue: Spiders Venue: Stone Times: 10.30pm - 2am Times: 10pm - 2am Price: Free The clubs long running indie night Times: 9pm - 1am continues with access to Funk U in the Pete Jordan, Future Proof price.

The One and Only Distortion Style: Rock Style: Rock, Indy, Alternative Venue: Spiders Venue: Rock City The one and only Friday rock night Price: £5 (NUS) If it rocks, its on. Times: 9pm - 2.30am

Soul Buggin with DJ Beane sundays Nottingham Live Music Festival Style: Funk, Jazz, Disco Out To Lunch 18 June, 9 July, 30 July, 20 August Venue: Bar Humbug Style: Jazz Price: Free Venue: Dogma The Nottingham Live Music Festival is Times: 8pm - 1am Price: Free Highness SoundSystem a series of four one day music and arts Times: Afternoon Style: Dub, Reggae, Roots events, which aim to deliver a fresh Salt Less of a club night and more of an Venue: BluePrint approach to festivals in the inner city. It Style: HipHop, House, Breaks experience. Sunday jazz and beats to Price: £5 will be showcasing some of Nottingham’s Venue: Dogma ease away the night before. Times: 10pm - late most creative local bands, artists, Price: Free storytellers and performing artists in Times: til 2am Sunday Bounce the green and sunny setting of the sat 09/07 Funky Breakbeat for the dancefl oor laced Style: RnB, Bashment Arboretum Park. with HipHop, House and Latin fl avours. Venue: The Edge Psycle Price: £3 Style: Psychedelic Trance Each day has a different line up of Love Shack Times: 10pm - 1am local bands to suit different tastes. The Venue: BluePrint Style: Eighties Price: £5 festival has been set up by a group of Venue: Rock City mondays local people as a creative platform for Times: 10pm - late Price: £4 adv £5 otd Vision: Metem Psychosis the local arts and music scene, providing Times: 9.30pm - 2am Chillin at Home VJ: Siricom Visual Services an opportunity for local people to come Style: Relaxed Decor: Aunty Audry, The Techno together and see what a vibrant array of Fridays @ The Market Bar Venue: Your Yard Hippy and friends artistic talent there is within their own Style: Breaks, House, Disco Times: After work till late community. Venue: The Market Bar Wont cost you a lot, depends what you Price: £4 (NUS) have for ya dinner and the price of a Line up details will be announced on sun 10/07 Times: 9pm - 3am mention. Probably the easiest night to Nightmare www.leftlion.co.uk With Residents Santero, Lorrie plan for. For more information visit: Style: Goth, Industrial, Cyber and Ian Tatham Venue: Spiders www.nottslivemusicfest.com listings... comedy/live music/clubs/theatre/exhibitions sun 12/06 sat 02/06 Period of June / July Black Drop Period of June / July Venue: Canalhouse Price: £1 Theatre Times: 7.30pm Exhibitions tue 05/07 tue 31/05 Linda Marlowe Presents Mortal Lord Arthur Saville’s Crime Ladies Possessed Venue: Royal Centre Venue: Lakeside Price: £8 - £22.50 Price: £10 / £7 (NUS) Runs Until: 4/6 Times: 8pm fri 03/06 fri 08/07 The Wiggles Venue: Royal Centre Fawn Again Price: £10 Venue: Playhouse Price: £14.50 tue 12/07 Times: 8pm Midnight The Wiz Venue: Royal Centre Window 05: - Sheila Ravnkilde Venue: Nottingham Arts Theatre mon 18/07 Price: £8 - £14.50 Date: 23/3 - 7/9 Price: £10.50 Hebeas Corpus Times: various Venue: Angel Row Gallery Times: 7pm, Matinee Sat: 2pm Venue: Nottingham Arts Theatre Runs Until:16/7 Price: Free Runs Until:4/6 Price: £5.50 - £7 Times: 7.30pm mon 18/07 Lawrence In Notts By Alan Bennett Date: 2/4 - 15/6 fri 03/06 Runs Until: 18/6 Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Venue: Lakeside are Dead Price: Free Venue: Lace Market Theatre tue 14/06 Written by Tom Stoppard An Inspector Calls Directed by Sharon Moir Venue: Royal Centre Runs Until: 23/7 Price: £8 - £20 JB Priestly’s Classic Thriller mon 18/07 Runs Until: 18/6 The Canturbury Tales Venue: Nottingham Castle fri 17/06 Price: £13 - £15 Runs Until:23/7 Spirit of Frieendship Qawwali Venue: Royal Centre tue 19/07 Price: £8 - £15 Times: 7.30pm The Lives of Orson Welles Venue: Lakeside El Antsui: Gawu Price: £10 / £7 Date: 16/4 - 5/6 Old Big ‘Ead in the Spirit Of The Man mon 20/06 Times: 8pm Venue: Lakeside Venue: Playhouse The York Realist Price: Free Price: £6 - £22 Venue: Lace Market Theatre thu 21/07 Times: 7.45pm Written by Peter Gill This Is A Test - James Ireland Brian Clough Takes To The Stage Directed by Malcolm Wilson A Night At The Musicals Date: 21/5 - 9/7 Cloughie takes to the stage in this locally Runs Until: 25/6 Venue: Royal Centre Venue: Angel Row Gallery written and produced show. Old Big ‘Ead Price: £13 - £14 Price: Free is, played by former The Bill actor Colin mon 20/06 Tarrant (above). One For The Road University Summer Exhibition Runs Until:25/6 Venue: Royal Centre fri 22/07 Date: 11/6 - 25/6 Price: £8 - £14 Venue: Lakeside Price: Free mon 06/06 Runs Until: 25/6 The Who’s Tommy Times: All Day Venue: Royal Centre thu 23/06 Runs Until: 11/6 Field Of Arrows Romeo and Juliet Date: 23/6 - 25/6 Ghulam Ali Venue: Nottingham Castle Venue: Broadway Venue: Royal Centre Price: £12 Price: £8 - £15 Andrew Wright Times: 7.30pm fri 24/06 Date: 2/7 - 14/8 Venue: Lakeside Black Drop London Studio Centre’s Intoto Dance Price: Free Style: Spoken Word Venue: Lakeside Venue: Canalhouse Price: £7 / £5 (NUS) Price: £1 Times: 8pm Times: 7.30pm

sat 25/06 Postman Pat tue 07/06 Venue: Royal Centre A Midsummer Night’s Dream Price: £9.50 Venue: Nottingham Castle Price: £12 mon 25/07 Classic Thrillers Season fri 01/07 Suddenly At Home Venue: Royal Centre Children Of The Crown Price: £8 - £14 Venue: Playhouse Runs Until: 30/07 Price: £12 Runs Until: 16/7 Liliane Lijn - Works 1959-80 Date: 2/7 - 21/8 fri 01/07 To get your gig Venue: Lakeside Motion House Price: Free Venue: Lakeside listed here Times: All Day Price: £10 / £7 (NUS) Lijn is an exponent of kinetic art Times: 8pm and has featured in numerous group get it entered exhibitions in Britain, Europe and Japan. This exhibition offers a chance to see a Darkin Ensemble Present sat 02/06 on the website collection of her work stretching over Venue: Lakeside Tractor Tom twenty years. Price: £10 / £7 (NUS) Venue: Royal Centre Times: 8pm Price: £9 Day to Day Data Darkin Ensemble’s distinctive style is www.leftlion.co.uk Date: 20/7 - 7/9 a merging of choreography and new Venue: Angel Row Gallery writing. They create dance that combines Price: Free the dynamism of the body and the [email protected] Curated by Ellie Harrison poetry of words, stretching the boundary between theatre and dance.

www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5 25 

 

This issue all of the answers are names of roads in and around NG1. If you manage to decipher them email your answers to [email protected] to claim a special mystery prize!

Across Down 2 The medium lives on it (6,4) 1 Climb to it to buy an 5 Allen Brady loses fifty animal (5,6,4) in the confusion (5,4) 3 Where less important 7 How his royal highness MP’s reside (5,10,6) moves (5,4) 4 Many a colour lives here (7,6) 8 Is it a street or a B road (5,6) 6 Sits on top of 2 across (6,8) 11 That slime bridge? (11,4) 9 Reach piglet here (7,4) 14 A sustained argument 10 Left in a coin on this road (5,6) on this street (4,4) 11 Go here to draw a boy? (8) 16 Where old G. Smith lives (7,6) 12 Where the bard lives? (11,6) 18 Sounds like a reward for her 13 Is this street out of it? (4,8) royal highness (5,6) 15 Robin hood follows it to find 20 Great tiles here! (6,4) his sweetheart (4,6,3) 21 Where age goes to oddly (5,4) 17 There’s a city on this 22 Where you will face the street! (6,6) ultimate test (2,6,4) 19 Can Allen live here? (5,6) 24 You might expect to see 23 On which live chickens, races here (9,6) geese, ducks etc (7) 25 Behind the centre of the same name (8,6) 26 www.leftlion.co.uk/issue5

Aries (March 20 - April 20) Libra (September 23 - October 23) In the last days, thr ee important things ar e going to happen. Man is going to escape Your favourite football team r ecently got r elegated. Boo hoo hoo! I’d cry for you if I the five sensory trap, society and big business as we know it is going to burn and wasn’t a r eal man. Instead I suggest that you get up off your arse and either get behind your numbers ar e going to come up on the national lottery. Unfortunately, by that time your team pr operly, or stop being such a big girl, get over it and find something else to Camelot will be bankrupt and money will be worthless. Tough br eak, kid… do on Satur days. Ar e you serious about r elegation? I don’t Doughty it…

Taurus (April 20 - May 21) Scorpio (October 23 - November 23) Nobody’s ther e when you get home, You’r e r enting movies on your own, My photo’s Dead men don’t wear plaid. The American actor Steve Martin taught me that on the set on your bedr oom wall, You sit ther e waiting for my call, You sad bast you need to die, of a 1982 film (the title of which I can’t r emember). I asked him at the time if it was true Go outside and eat a pie, Straighten your head and fix up good, ‘cos Jimmy Saville that he had two brains. He looked at me with a maniacal grin. He had cerebr ospinal says you should! fluid coming out of the corners of his mouth and said nothing.

Gemini (May 21 - June 21) Sagittarius (November 22 - December 22) If you get captur ed by the Feds on your latest mission, make sur e you ar e pr epar ed for Your life for ce is passing away one minute at a time. A human who lives for seventy the inkblot test. Rorschach was a tricky fellow and you need to be sharp. The test is five years will experience thirty six million, eight hundr ed and seventeen thousand, supposed to be pr ojective. If they ask you to talk, you can see pr etty faces and happy eight hundr ed and forty five minutes in their time on earth. Life’s too short to waste clouds in the mix. Whatever happens, don’t mention the horrific sea of blood! them trying to pr edict the futur e. Enjoy the sunshine while you can!

Cancer (June 21 - July 23) Capricorn (December 22 - January 19) Fr ogs, snails and puppy dogs tails will only keep for so long without causing a stink. It’s been a busy week. By the time Friday comes ar ound you can be for given for The neighbours want answers and the secr ets of how Contrary Mary’s gar den gr ows thinking that it’s another cold Tuesday night, spent surr ounded by a gang of people ar e about to be r evealed. The Flowers of Truth can be equally beautiful and danger ous. who want to know if you have a pen they can borr ow. The hallucinations will continue P r otect yourself against hayfever. until Satur day evening...

Leo (July 23 - A ugust 23) Aquarius (January 20 - February 19) Just after r eading eight dustjackets, will I like standing on nails? Is something right on June twenty -ninth. I gotta get in shape. Too much sitting has ruined my body. Too gr oove, ever r espectfully meaning even after nightmar es? Not assuming the har d afr o much abuse has gone on for too long. Fr om now on ther e will be fifty push-ups each nutter makes ill lepers leap, ever r evolutionary. I stand talking on ornately. Confused? morning. Ther e will be no mor e pills, no mor e bad food, no mor e destr oyers of my body. You will be… Fr om now on will be total or ganization. Every muscle must be tight!

Virgo (A ugust 23 - September 23) P isces (February 19 - March 20) You think you’r e bad, Russell Grant? I could take you on any time. I’d grab you by your Some people might think you’r e strange, but I think you’r e pr etty cool. Your ‘can do’ fuzzy hair and swing you ar ound the r oom until your head snaps off your fat shoulders. ethos and your love of woolly beanies has taken you this far in the world, so why If you bring Mystic Meg along, we’ll set the dogs on her and then play fetch with her bother changing now? Instead you should chill your boots and focus on the summer of bones. Justin Toper? I can top you any day of the week blood… fun that lies ahead. Strawberry Mivvi suckers ar e the must have item of the season.

Grate Misstakes in Cultural Histroy Nottingham City Council Chimp With A Typewriter

Annual Cost (£ millions) 352 0.001 Annual Cost (£ millions) Wastage of Cost (%) 42 0 Wastage of Cost (%) Banana Spendage (%) 0.001 89 Banana Spendage (%) Fez/Tin Cup Rating 0 9 Fez/Tin Cup Rating Governing Ability (Out of 10) 5 3 Governing Ability (Out of 10) #05: A ugust 1824, W illiam Buckland discovers dinosaur fones beneath the Earth’s crust