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~""I,~,~~"~!l,RQ",~~~g,~,!l!~i,"~Wilfrid Laurier University Volume 30, Number 4 Thursday September 14, 1989 The Cord Weekly Page 2 ...Thursday, September 14, 1989 I Staff EDITOR-IN-Cl-nEF CHRIS STARKEY

NEWS EDITOR jONATHAN STOVER

ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR VACANT

PEATURES EDITOR EUZABETH CHEN

SPOKI'S EDITOR BRIAN OwEN

ScENE EDITOR ToNY BURKE

PRooocnON MANAGER SANDY BucHANAN

Contributors: FRANK REnLY, LIZA SARDI ANDREW M. DUNN, KAREN BURKE STEVE BURKE, EDDIE PROCYK BLAIR liAINEs, MoNIQUE MclUIA.RoEY RoB BRoWN, THoMAs SZELBEL CHAD NEwsoME, NoRMAN E. WooD TANYAREITZEL,JANA WATSON MARK HAND, FRANCES Mc.ANENEY, RoB SAUNDERS, BILL NEEDLE Douo BoLGER, ANDREA NAsELL, • II'

BOARD OF DIRECTORS

MARK HAND, PRESIDENT BILL CASEY FRANCES MCANENEY ANNIE 0UONG DAVE WILMERING TONY KARG AL STRATHDEL, WLUSU

CORD STAFF MEETING

A great big hearty thank you and welcome to all of the new and/or prospective members of the CORD family.

Our first official staff meeting will be held this Friday at 2:30 in the offices. Bring a Friend! Have a coffee. Feed the Turtles! Oh joy, oh bliss! The Cord Weekly news------Page 3 ...Thursday, September 14, 1989 Laurier shines in Shinerama for CF fight

NORMAN E. WOOD Cord Weekly The next time you see WLUSU President AI Strathdee he may have his hair dyed an alarming purple and white. It's all part of the Shinerama bet Laurier and the University of Waterloo made with the University of Western Ontario. The idea was to see which side could raise $89,000 through Shinerama, part of the "89 in '89" theme. The student government executives of the losing side will dye their hair in the colours of the winning school or schools. If Western wins, Strathdee and the all of WLUSU's Vice-Presidents will have to dye their hair purple and white. Of the three schools involved, only Wilfrid Laurier University seems to have reached its goal. However, the exact results of Shinerama,last Saturday's climax to Frosh Week, are unknown. Laurier raised an estimated $37,000. That is an impressive $3,000 over the goal of $34,000. President Strathdee said that he was "really proud of our Frosh... they did great." When asked about Uni­ versity of Waterloo's performance he said only that he was "dis­ appointed. Really disappointed." Strathdee had no comment about the idea of dyeing his hair. University of Waterloo was to raise $55,000 which, combined with Laurier's total, would make the overall goal of $89,000. When asked for an estimate, U of W's Shinerarna Chairperson skirted the is­ sue, claiming that a lot of money is unaccounted for so far. On the Ob, those crazy Shiners! Laurier's spirit was un­ managed to raise $3000 more than expected. Way day of Shinerama, U of W raised about $15,000, $40,000 below its ln the annual campalan, as we actually go! (Robert Saunders Photo) goal. University of Waterloo's Federation of Students said that much of the money for Shinerarna is not made through the traditional shining of cars and shoes. The Peds made $2,000 during the summer on spe­ cial events, and are donating some of the proceeds from their services Cheerleaders sent home such as Fed Hall and the Bombshelter. Last year $9,000 was given to the Shinerama cause. By the October 31 deadline for Shinerama sub­ JONATHAN STOVER Cord Weekly rented vehicle. Arsenault also said that Frosh Week missions, U of W hopes to double the $15,000 raised so far. erased one transportation option for the squad. A lot of things were missing when the WLU The University of Western Ontario is also not ready to release its "There weren't any fan buses going to the Football Golden Hawks lost to McMaster Univer­ totals. Due to a logistical problem, all change collected had to be sent McMaster game," she said. sity in Hamilton last weekend. to Toronto for counting. $40,000 in bills was collected. UWO repre­ Noting that he didn't know how strong the One of them was the cheerleading squad. sentatives guessed that the fmal sum would be somewhere around According to WLU Athletic Director Rich cheerleadi'lg squad was in its routines, Newbrough $70,000. said that that also influenced his decision not to rent Newbrough he didn't budget a van to take the While it seems neither side will reach the $89,000 plateau, it is cheerleaders to McMaster for a number of reasons. a van. "They have to be practiced," Newbrough not yet possible to determine who will get the new hair style. According to head cheerleader Paula Arsenault, all said. Newbrough told the cheerleaders was that "he Athletic department liability in the event that didn't think we were ready." any vehicle rented for the squad was involved in an Newbrough said that a number of things in­ accident was also cited by Newbrough as part of his Birth control in works fluenced his decision. Citing a couple of incidents decision-making. over the past few years in which university mascots' Arsenault noted that the squad that had been were assaulted by drunk spectators at football practicing for a week prior to the McMaster contest games, Newbrough noted that he "didn't like the was an all-veteran squad with some experience. for student health plan way the climate is right now -- I'm not anxious for "Maybe because it (the game) was a television them (the cheerleaders and Hawk mascot) to go on game influenced his (Newbrough's) decision," she FRANCESP.MCANENEY On the problem of over­ the road." said. "Whatever the reason, there was nothing we Cord Weekly whelming costs limiting the avail­ The WLU Hawk has been involved in a couple could really do about it," Arsenault added. Safe sex may soon be part of able contraception to one method, of incidents. As well, one relatively famous mascot­ Laurier's next contest is at home to York, and the WLU student health plan. Donna Teigen, Head Nurse at iocident occurred at a University of Ottawa­ the cheerleaders will be there. Newbrough said that A survey to determine the Health Services said, "granted it's Carleton University game a few years ago. That oc­ the squad should also be travelling with the team to feasibility of incorporating birth going to cost more... granted not currence saw Mr. Peanut ruthlessly shelled by a Western the week after. ''I'm really satisfied with control into the student health everyone uses the pill but there drunken crowd. the security (for football games) at Western," New­ plan is being considered by the are other things people don't Both Newbrough and Arsenault noted that the brough said. University Affairs office of the use... (in the current health plan WLU cheerleading budget isn't sufficient to allow "Everything I do is considering their (the cheer­ Wilfrid Laurier University Stu­ like) antibiotics." tbe cheerleaders to attend every away game in a leaders') personal welfare," Newbrough said. dents' Union. The survey would On that same problem also see if students want birth WLUSU Director Mary Robinson control incorporated into the plan. said that "it's not necessarily fair" The survey will determine if that everyone has to pay for a York president boozes it Up the opinion of the student body benefit that not everyone would has changed since the last receive but "it's the same in the .YL WIGGERS AND works at a campus pub. "People he said. referendum was held in 1986. real world of politics ... all MONTESANO were also walking away from the But Toronto police officials That referendum saw WLU stu­ (people) pay for benefits that only 'Ilk Lexicon area with beers in their hands. I said that only the LLBO can li­ dents vote against including 'the a certain part of the population York University president couldn't believe it." cense an area licensed, whether pill' in the student health plan. receive." Providing adequate Arthurs' three-hour beer President Arthurs was seen normally or for special events. "The survey will include not birth control to prevent unwanted burger bash may jeopardize flipping burgers and wearing an Invitations for the picnic, only the pill question" said Vice­ pregnancies is a "social responsi­ 'Ilk's liquor license. apron. Vice-Presidents Levy, Ken signed by Arthurs and Levy, were President: University Affairs bility," she added. The party, held July 21 by a Davies and Ian Lithgow were distributed throughout the York Stuart Lewis. Instead, Lewis A method of subsidization for on York's suburban also in attendance. campus days before the event. noted, it will also be used to es­ birth control which would limit , was supposed to be Ray said the party ended two tablish what types of birth control Burgers and beer were advertised the costs of the proposal would be ' and Vice-President hours after he arrived, at three students want their health plan on those invitations. to a better idea said Strathdee. n Levy's "all-inclusive p.m. "I left at about 4:30 and cover, if any. The survey, which may com­ you to the community for there were people sitting next to It takes a lot of time and "I can't say for sure if there is mence in late September, will really significant efforts," us still drinking with a two-four money to get a special occasion any (student) interest or not (in help WLUSU determine if a new one school official. next to them." permit, according to Zein the birth control idea)" WLUSU referendum is warranted. But the party took place Ontario liquor licensing board Dawood. Dawood applied for a President AI Strathdee said. Changes to the current health t a special occasion permit (LLBO) official Barbara Potter, Special Occasion Permit to Strathdee noted, though, that "a plan include a cost increase from an area not normally used for said, "if alcohol is served in an celebrate the ground-breaking for survey is one way of going about $16 to $17. As well, the deduct­ · ,g alcohol. As well, wit­ unlicensed area, they (the admin­ a new building at York's Calumet it." ible has been increased to 20 per said alcohol was served istration) }lave to have a permit to college. Speaking as a member of the cent to cover the insurance com­ •ut asking for identification do that." Dawood said it took months student body and not as president, pany's loss ratio. to intoxicated people. Wit­ York food and housing direc­ to get the permit. "If we have to Strathdee said that "(the addition The payment system has also noted that the event tor Norman Crandles said he had go through the red tape, then so of birth control) makes the health remained the same requiring stu­ not fenced off. a license for the "staff lunch should the President," he said. plan very expensive. It would dents to pay for their prescrip­ "I saw one guy drink eight time." more than double the price of the tions initially and wait for reim­ in one hour and a lot of "I am the license holder of the President Arthurs, on vaca­ current health plan and that (is) a bursement from the insurance e had two beers, one in each university and I can deem any tion, could not be reached for fact." company. " said Darryl Ray, who on camous a licensed area," The Cord Weekly Page4... Thursday, September 14, 1989

It's been a hard •day at the news office. In fact, it's been such a hard day at the news of­ fice that it's the next day at the news office and the hard­ working news editor hasn't seen the lights of home yet. A nervous breakdown is probably only weeks away. But you can help. THE We need newswriters. People who want to blow the lid off the seething slime pits of the world. People who want free passes to exciting events. People who can sling a mean prose line while chugging back a 40· ouncer of rotgut between clenched, wind-swept teeth. People who love people ·• well, actually that's not a prerequi­ site. In fact, the more mean and ornery the better. But if you're all soft and gooey, we'll find some lovely story on beautiful flowers or wonderful cute little chipmunks for you to ooze nice­ ness all over. Come up to the Cord offices on the second floor of the Bryan C. Leblanc Campus Centre any time and ask for the news guy. Even better, come to the next news meeting on Wednesday, September 20 at 5 p.m. in the Cord offices. News. It's better than a kick in the bead.

Consider what's involved in writing a textbook.

A textbook is like a long essay that would take you at least 1,500 hours to write. That's the equivalent of researching and writing eight hours a day, five days a week, starting in September and continuing, without a holiday, until the end of the school year. • And then consider not getting paid for it. he pt in While your book makes a contribution to "Jl education, as an author, your reward also pi depends on your book being bought. pt Instead, a lot of people take advantage of your work by photocopying it - illegally. It makes you feel like you've been ripped off. de Well, you have been. ar ~ al Photocopying textbooks It Iii tt. pi is intellectual exploitation. S1 ~ FIND OUT A message from the College Group of the Canadian Book PubiLShen' Council le and me Canad1an Reprography Collecnve. ' p: The Cord Weekly news Page 5 ...Thursday, September 14, 1989 Student tax woes ,SPECIAL TO THE CORD Canadian students will be at least $340 poorer if federal fmance !minister Michael Wilson's unpopular Goods and Services tax is put ! ~.~ -·- -· in place. The reform package includes a tax break for low-income earners, lwhile imposing a nine per cent sales tax on most goods and services. at the The reform, to take effect in 1991, also provides an extra tax .~ been 'credit for single, independent people earning between $6,175 and S\3,175. The credit would mean an extra $140 for low-income earners. H But most students won't earn enough to be eligible for it. "A lot of students make less than $6,175," said Havi Echenberg, executive director of the National Anti-Poverty Organization. Advertising research on post-secondary students shows about 65 H ~ per cem live away from home. About half of all post-secondary stu­ &: dents earn less than $7,000 per year. 2§ "There's no reason for it," Echenberg said. "It's the only credit tzl ¥riters. ~ the lid based on a minimum-earned income in the whole reform package," s of the she said. HOW CAN UNIVERSITY STUDENTS 8E Ll VING ~ free Department of Finance officials say students don't need the tax nt credit. fPeople BELOW TH£ POVERTY LINE?. .. I 1HOU6HT ~ Dse line "What students are spending money on, things like tuition, rent, a 40- and food aren't going to be taxed," said finance official Rick Byers. etween 'So there's not the need to have the credit in that case -- students THE'( DE.TE.RMINED IT!. •• teeth. aren't hit that hard by the goods and services tax." -- well, One department of finance official, who asked not to be named, erequi- said students who earned less than $6,175 didn't need extra money. "To give them the extra credit would be another form of social as­ Student fees to be bitten by GST? nand sistance," he said. "And it would not be well targeted." offered by student unions. "We aren't a charitable you're "I've been to school, and I've seen lots of students who had in­ SPECIAL TO THE CORD organization," Strathdee noted of WLUSU, "but ~II find comes of that level that had no need of assistance," he added. Student association fees and other incidental "That's crazy," WLUSU President AI Strathdee said of the plan. fees will be subject to the goods and services tax we're certainly a non-profit organization." eautiful Tuition fees for courses given for credit at uni­ ~te little While he noted that some of the General Sales tax parameters would according to a finance department official. I • versities and public colleges will not be taxed. ze mce- probably be different by the time it goes into effect in 1991, Strathdee "If membership in a student organization pro­ 'doubted that the government would do anything about helping out vides significant benefits, they will be taxable," However, non-credit courses will be subject to the those who earn less than $6,175 a year. said the official, who refused to be named. "Student nine per cent tax, as will all incidental and course 1offices material fees. e Bryan "This (the lack of an income-tax credit for those earning less than association fees generally do provide benefits to itre any S6,17S) obviously reflects on the lack of sensitivity of the federal their members in that they collectively pay for rep­ Finance department official Rick Doyon said ;vsgu y. government towards low-income earners in general," Strathdee said. resentation to government" the new tax is intended to deny public and non­ Canadian Federation of Students researcher Mike Old estimated Canadian Federation of Students (CFS) Chair profit groups an unfair advantage where they pro­ ~e next r esday, that the new tax will cost students an extra $200 per year. Jane Arnold said a tax on student association fees is vide the same service as private companies. . in the And while Byers said the tax credit will leave students and other ridiculous . Colleges and universities that charge fees for low income earners better off, Echenberg isn't convinced. "What kind of a government do we have that services duplicated by private companies can ex­ "a kick The tax credit would grow annually at three per cent less than in­ would tax students' right to organize and be pect to be taxed. flation each year after 1991. represented?" she said. "It's going to make it more "A student charged a fee for renting a musical "For the first year, most people do wind up ahead," Echenberg difficult for CFS to organize." instrument by the school," the official said, "is get­ said. But in the following years, the tax credit won't keep up with in­ Some interest groups' membership fees would ting the same service as they would if they bought flation. not be taxable, according to the official. Organiza­ the instrument for educational purposes, so it will "People who are in a weak bargaining position -- single parents, tions like Greenpeace, which ask people to become be taxed." people in the service industry and non-unionized workers -- if there is members, would not be taxed under the new legis­ inflation, chances are that they're not 1win_g to keeo uo," she said. lation .. President Arnold also condemned the govern­ "Students arc almost always working in these kind of jobs," she "In that case, what they call a membership fee is ment's intention to tax incidental fees. added. really more like a donation," he said. "Greenpeace "Students are already up against a wall for Byers said the government could not afford to extend the credit to may lobby, but it's not on behalf of their members money," she said,"And every penny does count single people earning less than $6,175. per se." The Goods and Services tax will take effect in "The tax reform isn't meant to be a social program," he said. "It's WLUSU President AI Strathdee was blunt about 1991 and apply to most goods and services as part just meant to make sure that the tax affects everyone equally." his feelings about the news. "That's totally of ongoing tax reform. ridiculous," he noted, adding that he couldn't be­ With Canadian Unlversltv Press 90urces lieve the federal government would tax the services With Canadian University Press IIOUrces Global warming beginning to raise ocean level PIPPA B. WYSONG ings quite different from those in increasing between 1.5 and 3.3 quite close to the mean sea level. storm surges--massive tloods Canadian Science News other parts of the world. As a millimeters a year, the average Relatively minor increases of sea driven inland by storm winds-­ The level of the oceans is result, trying to calculate global­ being 2.4 millimeters. level...can cause quite a deal of would become more of a prob­ rising slowly but surely, accord­ scale changes in sea levels can be That doesn't sound like a lot, damage." lem. Peltier cited Bangladesh as ing to research done by two Uni­ quite difficult. but spread out over the entire "Even a rise of sea level of an example of a region that has versity of Toronto researchers. Peltier and Tushingham have water surface of the world, 2.4 one meter would be disastrous," suffered much damage from The study may provide new found a way to work around these millimeters is a monstrous he said. With a higher sea level, stonn surges. evidence that the Earth is getting variations. amount of water. "The major is­ warmer because of the green­ The differences in the gauge sue is where the water is coming house effect. While it does not measurements in different parts from," Peltier said. Should the an­ prove that the greenhouse warm­ of the world "are associated with nual rise continue, or suddenly in­ Condom sense: ing effect is occurring, this is a changes in the Earth's shape," crease, the people of future "plausible hypothesis," said Peltier said. He noted that the decades could find their coast­ professor W.R. Peltier of U ofT's Earth is undergoing changes now lines moving steadily inward, and physics department. that were set in motion by the last their coastal cities sinking It's your life, after all By analyzing data from a ice age 18,000 years ago. beneath the waves. world-wide network of measuring At that time, Canada and Peltier attributed the rise in (Source: AIDS Committee of Toronto) devices called tide gauges, Peltier Northwestern Eurooe were cov­ water to a global warming effect, and graduate student Mark ered by large ice sheets. "The the warming caused when the * Practice while masturbating before using them in sexual encounters. Tushingham have determined that melting of those ice sheets caused Earth's atmosphere traps heat and * Don't give up after one try. It takes a while to get used to them. the oceans are rising at a rate of a marked deformation in the prevents it from escaping into * Squeeze the air out of the tip when you start putting it on. about 2.4 millimeters. shape of the Earth," Peltier said. space. * Buy condoms made out of latex. Lambskin membrane condoms Peltier said there are more Since then the planet has been Such global warming causes break far too easily. than 1000 such gauges, which he adjusting its shape in response to ice caps to melt and water in the *Use lots of lubricant, but make sure it's water-soluble like K-Y jel­ likened to meter sticks, all over those changes, and these shifts oceans to undergo thermal expan­ ly, Lubafax or Muco. Crisco, Vaseline and other oil-based products the world; some have been in account for many of the regional sion. "If all the ice on the damage latex rubbers and could lead to condom breakage or perfora­ place for a century or more. variations in tide gauge readings . Antarctic were to melt, then the tion. • Scientists check the gauges peri­ Peltier and Tushingham de­ sea level would rise something * To avoid leakage, pull out soon after ejaculating. Make sure to grab odically to see how much sea veloped mathematical approaches like 70 meters (200-300 feet)," both penis and condom fmnly while doing so. levels change over time. that take the earth's changing Peltier said. * If you want to be absolutely safe, pull out before ejaculation. ' Peltier said that gauges in one shape into account They There are many parts of the *Never re-use a condom. It' s not a piece of Tupperware. part of the world may have read- determined that the sea level is world (such as) Florida which are -.:.. - ~--=-=-_...... __. __ ...___,;:.-____ ------. "

The Cord Weekly Page 6... Thursday, September 14, 1989 news

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Wby? Because it's so god damned cheap. Take the matter of summeztime pre-registration. You get this cheesy package of stuff that you're supposed to mail back to the uni­ versity to ensure that you'll be enrolled in aD the courses you during the ridiculous registration runaround in February. You've got an envelope to mail back, neatly addressed to che.OC­ f~ee of the Registtat~ But does WLU pay lbe .CC)Sl of postage for yaur bloody eS$OOCial regisuation confumatiou ~ Look! It's another attractive building on campus! standing when he took this, but that building sure Is Of course not This is. after aU, only one of three bloody UDivcf,.: We're not sure where our Intrepid photographer was pretty! (Woody Woodpecker Photo) in NOitb ~that makes aprofit every,.... v ...... wr ·""'"'-· stamp()ft- mail the damned ..... ~'} ' Wake up, you morons! SeaifiDa oaf Olfi7e or tho .Rc&illrlt····· • ...... , JONATHAN STOVER Blatant Filler The Survival Complex lies because, trite as it is, True or false: King Arthur was a real person. everyone dies and everyone's nuclear family dies. The answer is 'true.' Arthur was probably the The complex is a losing propositioll wrapped up in last of Great Britain's Celtic high kings sometime comfortable clothing. during the fifth century A.D., when Celtic Britain By the survival comple' 's reckoning, King and the Roman Empire in general were beginning Arthur made no sense. Neither did the guy in the to unravel. Arthur held it all together in Britain, Potomac River. Neither did Joan of Arc. Neither held it together that the Celtic nation survived for a does Mother Theresa or Charles Lmdbergh or Terry generation after his death before convulsively dis­ Fox or Jesus Christ. integrating. In the space of a century Wales, Scot­ Following the survival complex's star for the land and England were created from the Celtic na­ most part, we've raped the land and shit in the tion. ocean. We've killed off hundreds of thousands of Arthur's name survived and became legend be­ species and put ourselves in the dubious position of cause he did the impossible. maybe being the flCSt specte!. to wipe itself off the There's this thing called the Survival Complex world as well. which usually gets mentioned in biology class, or But we invented the Golden Rule as well. We maybe during a high school health class. painted the Sistine Chapel. We sent Voyager II out Biological drive is centered around survival -­ of the solar system and towards the stars. of the individual and of the nuclear family. The sur­ The dinosaurs didn't make their end, but they vival complex drives the reproductive cycle, and it didn't have a chance to avert it either. Go back to drives animals and humans alike to protect them­ nature and we might let the planet heal itself -- but selves from pain and injury. we might also be extinguished anyway the next The Survival Complex is also what keeps most time a comet hits the Earth or an ice age rolls over of the human race hidden away within itself when­ us. Say good night, dinosaurs. ever it comes time to face the important issues. It's About 2500 years ago the Persian Empire in­ easy to pick a brand of beer -- that doesn't make the vaded Greece. Most of the Greek city-states capitu­ Survival Complex do its own version of the Tilt-a­ lated or were smashed. The Persian path of invasion whirl inside ourselves. took it towards a narrow mountain pass where a A few years back a jetliner went into the small Greek force waited. The Persians sent an ad­ Potomac River in Washington during the height of vance envoy to bargain with the Greeks, to make the Christmas season. The waters were freezing, but them listen to reason. one passenger treaded water and hauled survivor "Listen," they told the Greeks, "our force is so after survivor into the slings thrown down from the huge -- 150,000 to your 3000 -- that our arrows will bridge above. He did so until he didn't have the block the sun." strength to haul himself into one of the slings. So he The Greek answer was simple. drowned. "Fine. The Greek sun is hot at this time of year." Biologically he made no sense. But the Survival "If we fight in the shade, all the better." Complex is a liar, the worst liar of them all. The lie The Greeks eventually lost at Thermopylae, due it tells, though, isn't one an animal can see. It's one more to treachery than to the Persian militia. But human beings can see if they want to, but most of later the Greeks drove the Persians out again. the time we don't. If we fight in the shade, we fight in the shade. 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~Concordia lifts Coors ban

MONTRtAL (CUP) -- Con­ of change," Bray said in an inter­ as the Heritage Foundation--co­ cordia's student council has lifted view. "They're (Jeff and Peter founded in 1973 by Joseph u a three-year ban on the sale of Coors) young and progressive. Coors--a right-wing think tank Coors beer, but some students say They've righted the wrongs." which has demanded the abolition KRISHNA I the council did the wrong thing. But council vice-president of the minimum wage and social Toronto Va The council voted recently to liaison Shari Clarke said Bray did service cutbacks. The Un overturn a 1986 decision to not present proof that Coors had Coors also supports the Moral fund raisinB boycott the beer because the mended its ways. Majority, an American evangeli­ donations Coors family--sole owners of the "They say they've changed cal group headed by Reverend wants to ~ beer--funded and actively sup­ Jerry Falwell. According to the panics with their policies, but when I ask ported "organizations, politicians California-based Coors Boycott rica. and legislation that are in opposi­ them for concrete evidence, they Coalition, "the Moral Majority don't have any," she said. "Their Breaktht tion to the best interests of the calls for the death penalty for les­ money fror poor, the elderly, students, policy may have changed on bians and gays, and many of ties to Sot women, visible minorities, les­ paper, but not in practice." Coors' invasive labor policies are Clarke said the Coors family licensing bians and gay men, and other aimed at weeding out still supports organizations such agreements groups on the lower rungs of the homosexuals." eluding $5 economic and social ladder." Canada. A representative from The cam Molson--the company which cept money brews and markets Coors beer in Peace on Earth? T has black Canada--told the council that the pursue don U.S.-based brewery has corrected SPECIAL TO THE CORD panics. many of its past wrongs. The United Nations International Day of Peace will be officially "I don't think they've given celebrated at Laurier this year. The WLU Women's Issues Club has The U proof that they've mended their prepared an itinerary for the event, which will get underway at 11:30 voted to d ways," said council co-president a.m. in the Quadrangle. companies Melodic Sullivan. "Affmnative Those interested are invited to gather in the quad to hear a variety can investm action policy looks great on of guest speakers, according to Women's Issues Club president U ofT grou paper, but I'd like to see the Angela Pettin. Representatives of Amnesty International and Project divest the statistics." Ploughshares, among others, will deliver short presentations to those fund. In the 1970s, Coors used pre­ assembled. The focal point of the presentation will occur at 12 noon, employment lie-detector tests when gatherings across·the globe will pause for a minute of silence. David A with an apparent "anti-gay" bias, University o but it insists it has corrected past ciation said wrongs. consistent. Molson regional sales man­ one of sever ager Hugh Bray emphasized the hind the dive policy changes made in the "new "The uni era" with Jeff and Peter Coors at position that the helm. will divest "There's a new undercurrent vestments in C) SKIP WIWAMSON 1989 kew said. "I donations fr it would not TRIPPIN' -THROUGH THE p TROPICS THE SUN SPOT TANNING + BEACHWEAR

What's the point? 220 KING ST. N-­ 747-5563 We need you to write for the Cord BEH/ND STANLEY BURGERS, Counterpoint: Why!?! LUBE, OIL, FILTEA

ONLY S1 9 95 ~~~T CARS THINK OF ALL TilE DRIVING YOU DID THIS SUMMER? CALL-TODAY FOR THIS QUALI1Y SERVICE SPECIAL. (DON'T DELAY- OFFER GOOD TILL OCT 15,09) fine print: just joking. If you have a great idea ~~;r :u~~~::!~~~ ;F~ MUFFLERS for a feature come see the .CAA APPROVED . GUARANTEED QUALITY SUSPENSION .SERVICING TtiE UNIVERSITY AREA SINCE 1968 FRONT WHEEL DRIVE feature QUEEN (Elizabeth) .REPAIRS TO ALL MAKES AND MODELS. BIG SMALL NEW OLD at the Cord offices. 160 COLUMBIA ST. WATERLOO NOTE NEV.' L•JCA l"JN R~ t.,R ')F ~OR MER STACK A-SHELF BUILDING ~ .. - -- -=-~--

The Cord Weekly news Page 9 ... Thursday, September 14, 1989 U of T takes South African money iolition KRISHNARAU Gordon Cressy, U ofT's vice­ Toronto-based Task Force on the investment, not the Canadian pany that had very strong ties to social Toronto Varsity president of development and Churches and Corporate Respon­ company. South Africa gave 100 million, The University of Toronto's university relations and head of sibility, Shell Canada is 79 per "It's difficult to look a gift that would be a different issue Moral fund raising campaign will accept Breakthrough, said the campaign cent owned by the Royal Dutch horse in the mouth," Fred Wilson, (from Shell)." angeli­ donations from anyone who has no rules on accepting money. Shell Group, which wholly owns president of the University of erend wants to give, including com­ "Our policy is we accept Shell South Africa. Toronto Faculty Association said. Cressy added that corporate to the panies with holdings in South Af­ donations from everybody. The The company has been the "On the other hand, there ~e donations accounted for only $22 rica. donations are for the university target of an international boycott moral questions about accepting million of the $69 million raised and a lot of people require campaign waged by anti­ tainted money. I think the univer­ so far by the Breaklhrough Breakthrough has accepted money. apartheid groups, trade unions sity should think twice about ac­ campaign. money from corporations with "We are not consciously ex- and churches. cepting this," he added. ies are ties to South Africa and with Cressy said the larger the licensing and merchandising cluding donors to the campaign But Robert Wilson, U of T's Breakthrough has also ac­ I out donation, the more reluctant he cepted donations of at least agreements in South Africa, in­ on the basis of how they acquire investment manager, said the uni­ their money," said Cressy. would be to accept it. cluding $500,000 from Shell versity would be able to invest in $25,000 from the Bank of Nova According to Moira Shell Canada,because the parent "I'm a strong supporter of the Scotia, Ford, Imperial Oil and Canada. divestment policy. If some com- The campaign has yet to ac­ Hutchinson, co-ordinator of the company has the South A.frican Xerox. cept money from companies D of T has blacklisted, but it is free to pursue donations from such com- icially panies. ' ~ b has The University of Toronto 111 :30 voted to divest its holdings in companies with direct South Afri­ rariety can investments in January 1988. sident U of T groups are also seeking to 'roject divest the university's pension those fund. noon, 1ce. I I David Askew, president of the University of Toronto Staff Asso- E" 1 ciation said the policy seems in­ consistent. The association was one of several campus groups be­ hind the divestment campaign. "The university has taken the position that it won't invest or will divest any company with in­ vestments in South Africa," As- kew said. "It should not accept !k>nations from those companies it would not hold investments in." GRAD Sign-Up WLU STUDENT PU 8 LICATIONS Week PHOTO NEEDS PEOPLE! JOSTEN'S has been chosen as the Official Apply for a position today! Graduation Portrait Photographer fT Some available jobs are: -Associate News Editor R -Systems Technician -Directors (3) and many, many, more.... DEPARTMENT/MAJOR PHOTO DATE 2nd floor S.U.B. Business Administration Oct. 23, 24, 25 Business, Management Studies and Oct. 26 (also known as the Joe Bystrlcki Secure Student Centre) Accounting Diplomas, Economics Psychology Oct. 27 Deadline for applications is Friday History, Physical Education Oct. 30 English, French, German, Philosophy, Oct. 31 at 4:00. Religion and Culture, Archaeology (? Political Science, Geography, Communications Nov. 1 Music, Biology, Math, Computing, Physics Nov. 2 --WLUSP 'tHErm••Is··rqo OBL1GATION" GENERAL MEETING TO 'PURCHASEI!ORTRAITS # Friday, September 15 at 3:30pm WE These photos will be used as your personal graduation portaits, your Keystone yearbook grad photo and the photo for your faculty composite in room P2005. Directors will be elected. PHOTOGRAPHY BY: DAVE POND AND CLAUDE MARCOTTE OF !JOSTEN'S I Fun will be had. You will be there. .,.._ -- - ~ -- - ...

The Cord Weekly Page 10... Thursday, September 14, 1989 vv E LE'IA1'0R 'LAN kE)£CTE C)­ ByF \U~~£T .,.o 4£T ~ \)Qtv\!" llOOF The not to i AND P~OMO'le ~AFE' ~e)( other bir - a be brou body one form of Brave New Turret A r years ag What will Laurier students think of the "new" Turret? majority free birth Last spring, WLUSU unleashed its grand vision for their h y-needed renovations at our campus pub. Costing a that wo plan's f; quarter of a million student dollars, the September '89 This Turret was to feature a new sound system, mod lighting, dent bod] furniture that wasn't Early Modem Cafeteria in style (and if they f a high school cafeteria at that), a new dance floor, a control i1 permanent stage area, band dressing rooms, draught beer, health pi a coat check, and two more stand-up bar areas to improve kind of b like the p service. This We're halfway through September and the "new" Tur­ Union, i one prob ret was unveiled last night. It consisted of a new dance adequate floor. There isn't even a stage area yet -- according to g g ated a gr WLUSU President Al Strathdee, the students' union ing this hopes to be able to contract out for that sometime in the Q tion. near future. The c Anyone who was expecting the Fed Hall-like promises would have been sadly disappointed. The only reason the Jf6N dance floor was tom up and re-tiled was due to the fact that it couldn't survive another sanding. It's not as if the money hadn't been promised... former Vice-President: Finance Chris Gain had given WLUSU assurance that the money was in the bank, when in the union was about 200,000 in debt to the univer­ "Gay Pride" deplorable and licentious When current President AI Strathdee saw this prob­ TO THE EDITOR Sodom and Gomorrah were he and VP:Finance Shafeeq Bhatti negotiated a deal destroyed, so too will these the university in which enough funds were loaned to "PRIDE GOETH BEFORE A LETTERS centres which currently harbor FALL ... " these licentious, base-minded Crisis over, right? Wrong. The quotes from contractors In scenes reminiscent of the people. hours before the destruction of TO THE The supporters and in and the total design cost was about 35% more Sodom and Gomorrah (Genesis WLUSU's budget. The OMB decided not to decide sympathizers of so-called "Gay 19), cities throughout North EDITOR Pride" days should consider the ways of cutting some promised features were worked America are witnessing parades ominous warning in Proverbs: The end result is the same old Turret with a spiffy of perverse, immoral men and "PRIDE GOETH BEFORE A women demanding that the s dance floor. It's sort of like putting a toupee on a FALL... " (Proverbs 16:18). dog. government and society recognise and lesbian behaviour. and accept their deplorable, gay We can be assured that, as Peter Ventresca The Turret had surplus revenue of over $63,000 at the of 1988-89. That's a good profit, although it's 15,000 less than what was budgetted for. What kind of Blotters: Strathdee says sorry to Starkey can we expect this year, though, when the Student DEAR SIR, sees the Turret -- and, more importantly, sees all of Recently I partook in a practi­ the months of September, Octo­ 1 apologize for my actions and other pubs and dance clubs open to them? cal joke which has had more ber, November and December. It I hope that this bad joke will not Sometimes major decisions have to be made. The Tur- serious implications than first was our intention that this action cause serious damage to Mr. needed major renovations. Thanks to the foolish in­ realized. The recently published be viewed humourously and we Starkey. of last year's decision makers, this year's Student Publications Desk Blotter did not mean to infringe upon any now has Cord Editor Chris publication rights or to sabotage a got screwed on the matter of the Turret. The fact Starkey's birthday appearing in quality publication. AI Strathdee though, that more needs to be done with the Tur- than a new wooden dance floor and a new stage some­ before the end of the fall term. Prove you want to feel by Liza Sardi If WLUSU doesn't do something major about the Tur­ To the "Feeler" from last week's "Question of doors down from us. You could spend your entire signs we soon, the wonderful new elevator-- well off-schedule the Week". How refreshing it is every year to see university career in the Games Room. You could young, eager and idealistic first year students. Con­ count fluff bunnies under your couch. You could go reveled in well -- may be servicing a less-than-full bar come No­ Every~ . The Turret used to be the centre of the campus gratulations on wanting to "feel" university life. to the Turret, Taps and OEP every Thursday, Fri­ Unfortunately, I am often disappointed when I see day and Saturday (in that order) every week for 4 tion. The~ cause it n •~>~wH:u life, but the times, they are a-changing. individualistic Frosh ultimately blend into the years. You could do your homework every night the mortg And who would blame people for staying away from a masses (start buying your Ralph Lauren now). Wel­ You could fake it and join a few insignificant clubs. and WU that looks the locker room of the Toronto come to the university where so many "feeling" countered people turn into apathetic, uncaring, disinterested You could join the masses that may never break structed i1 students. out of that cycle. You could probably move back to The signs the same town you were born in, and live down the ministrati1 Editorial opinions are approved by The Cord Weekly on behalf of Cord staff and are If you're really sincere prove it. Like the old street from Mum and Dad. Bag groceries at the lo­ independent of the Univenity, the Students' Union and the Student Publications Board "ownershi cliche says: You get out of life what you put into it cal A & P, marry the check out girl, drive a pickup of Directon. truck, form a bowling team for excitement, go to EDITORIAL BOARD If you really want to feel, get involved with the same bar every weekend, and vacation in a the u WLUSU or even better WLUSP and get bombastic, trailer camp (especially one along the 401). Chris Starkey, Editor-in-Chief Jonathan Stover, News Editor sedulous, focused, zealous, emphatic, proud, ~.. nu Elizabeth Chen, Features Editor Brian Owen, Spons Editor Tony Burke, Scene Editor touched, crazy, admired, respected, achieved, ful­ Or you could have some sense of accomplish­ filled, overworked, frivolous, foolish, irrational, im­ ment, of having achieved some goal. You could ~~ The Cord Weekly is published during the fall and winter academic terms. Offices are pulsive, precipitous, myopic, reckless, expeditious, make a difference, be a leader and not a follower. located on the Second Floor of the Joe Bystricki Secure Campus Centre at Wilfrid spontaneous, laid back, creative, crazy, excited, Don't expect feelings to come to you - go out and Laurier Univenity, 75 University Ave. W., Waterloo (519) 884-2990. The Cord respected, revered, and sometimes hated. find them. You don't necessarily have to change the Weekly is an active and proud member of Canadian Univenity Press and the Ontario 4 Community Newspaper Association. Copyright 1989, WLU Student Publications. No world or even want to, but you can change yourself .. pan of The Cord Weekly may be reproduced without the permission of the Editor-in­ Or you could join the masses. You could watch and that's what really counts. Help break the tradi­ Chief. Y & R everyday in the T.V. Lounge, just a few tion of apathy at Laurier before you get caught in it That is, if you dare. The Cord Weekly Page ll...Thursday, September 14, 1989 VVLUSU can still ill afford pill By Frances P. McAneney would provide free birth control receive. The unfairness of that pills would almost double bring­ kind of situation is quite apparent. The question of whether or ing the price of the revised health not to include 'the pill' or ·any plan to approximately $30.00 per Furthermore, the question of other birth control method may student. Including more than just providing free birth control via be brought to the Laurier student one type of contraception would the student health plan was body once again, this time in the inflate the costs even more forc­ resolved by a 'no' vote three form of a survey. ing students to pay a substantial years ago in a referendum at an A referendum, held three sum for a service they might not approximate cost of $3,000. The years ago, clearly stated that the even use. present student administration, majority of students didn't want Apart from the astronomical more specifically the office of free birth control pills included in fee increases a move like this University Mfairs, should accept their health plan package; a move would surely provoke; other that decision and spend more en­ that would have increased the problems would arise, the most ergy trying to provide the stu­ What are you expecting plan's fees by almost 100%. significant of which would be the dents with such benefits as a pay from the "new" Turret? This time, however, the stu­ discriminating manner in which direct health plan rather than dent body will not only be asked the benefits of this proposal bring up old issues that have al­ if they favour having their birth would be apportioned. Since it ready been decided. By Liza Sardi and Tony Burke control included in next year's would be almost impossible for Providing the luxury of free health plan package but what the health plan to provide a full birth control to the Laurier stu­ kind of birth control they would range of free birth control, as the dent body would be a welcomed "Same scene, more like the plan to contain as well. cost would be overwhelming, the addition to the health plan and in people, wider pants, more This move by the Students' student body would find them­ fact is already a part of many Union, in their attempts to solve syntho-pop, gold selves in the position of limiting larger University's health ser­ etc." one problem - ensuring access to their selection of contraception to vices. But because of Laurier's adequate birth control, have cre­ only one or perhaps two methods. small student enrollment, the Brian Weigel ated a great deal more by rehash­ This would have the inevitable costs of implementing such a plan 3rd Yr. Psychology ing this previously resolved ques­ result of forcing all students to fi­ are so astronomical that it is a tion. nance a benefit that only a frac­ luxury that Laurier students can The cost of a health plan that tion of the student body would ill afford . .NAN SfAJUfiA hY GEJW' MCCJrTE..

WE.LlDME /o 7'1/f ~11(Sr bAt OF C.LAS.S. PLEASE &ETA PEI-I "A meat market" AND PAPEJl. DUT AIJD f'K(PAKE FOK AN EXAM •.. • Marco DiBernardo 1st Yr. Poli Sci us were these harbor ~ minded c. I /(WI.f)l I .., . \ r==-11 c=\ ~ - LJ U~.d "Fed Hall" and ~ "Gay der the Kerri McKenzie bverbs: 4th Yr. Hons. Comp. Sci. IRE A Stark Raving by Chris Starkey ey Since the Cord came out last week, people have We at the Cord know that the buildmg IS "oth­ "The same old good times been expressing confusion, bewilderment, and even cially" called the Student Union Building, but that and old friends" )OS and outrage at our use of the term "Nichols Campus doesn't necessarily mean we need to call it that. Centre" (which is often referred to as the Student Yes, it is the building which houses the student ill not Tim Lang Mr. Union Building) in the newspaper. Since the story union. But it also contains Dean Nichols' offices. behind that name is a bit dated, so let's tum back There are many people who have graced these halls 2nd Yr. Socialization the clock to 1986. who are also worthy of having the building named The setting? The WLUSU Volunteer Dinner at after them, but "Deano" was and is perhaps the the Turret. The speaker? WLUSU President and most deserving general thorn in the side of the WLU administration But when a few student journalists want to poke Mau Certosimo. Matt had a lot of grand visions, some fun at an issue that should. have been buried and one of them was to re-name the Student Union long ago, every WLU administrator and their uncle "I hope camping out is Building after Fred Nichols, long-time Dean of Stu­ crawls up and down the back of the Cord, the worth it" entire dents. The ceremony took place that night, building WLUSU President (who has nothing to do with could signs were put up the next day and everyone what goes in the Cord anyway) and the Dean him­ reveled in the glory of WLUSU's decision. self (who has even less influence over Cord con­ Jane Kluball ldgo 1st Yr. Business y, Fri­ Everyone except Dr. Weir and the administra­ tent. C'mon guys, the only people that knew the for 4 tion. They argued that the building was theirs be­ story before now are at least in fourth-year. I would night cause it rested on their property and that they held like to think that WLU students take what the Cord clubs. ~ mortgage on it, which subsequently gave Matt writes as gospel, but even I'm not naive enough to 81 WLUSU no right to re-name it. WLUSU believe that. countered with the fact that student money con­ break Just to show how stupid the whole debate is, SUIX:ted it and was paying the mortgage off as well. nck to we've decided to "re-name" the Student Union "Topless waitresses" The signs were taken down, WLUSU took the ad­ n the Building. It's now the Joe Bystricki Secure Student Centre, or JBSSC. e lo­ ministration to court and lost the ensuing and the Phil King "ownership" of the SUB. At least for this week. ickup 2nd Yr. Economics go to in a the university blues by Kevin Matchstick

&1. TH~ JS IT. 1 ~m 1$/r;.ff~TO HI ~fJAJ. I'M UfRf FaR 1M AT UNI~~'OtTY. .. tJAV!~tq,~ plish­ 0 FO~ A "P'EW O.AI M'( OWJJ E ~fiq ~Kt~.'T !JE£ U{)Wili'~ could lHE FIR~T TIME ro ANdWFR. ro PtJJN/1. jjH, rHe- 0 ~'fo/f~ 'r'E'~ 1J.{1.J 14 wA v, vou ~~~to THf LIF~ ... WcJMEN1 "Amazing, WOIAtll WMM~ -~~';!k~E 01 .,...... :::; -frrlJF· awesome! We're on () \. manhunt" Bobbsey Twins 1st Yr. Smoking The Cord w Page 12 eekly ...Thursda ), , September 14 , 1989

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~ I F I G R E 0 u, , T

A L L A B 0 U T

You are here.

S'CUSE ME, EH. Imagine this room is a party. All the bottles and cans represent people at the party. Imagine you're at the party and you really need to use the washroom, but it's on the other side of the room! See how long it takes to get to the washroom without getting stuck. Better hurry, eh. ----~~~~~

Some great acts came through from the crowd that paled in com­ me get lucky with you". ftrmities of old age, The Who had feared that the energetic die area this summer and our parison to the more obscure Opemng for the Proclaimers arrived. For old and new fans guitarist's antics would be toned writers were there to enjoy them. material such as George Jones' was American guitarist Ed Hanes. alike, The Kids are Alright Tour down after doctor's orders forced So, in case you were on a bender ''I'm Gonna Burn Your Delighting the audience with the was a dream come true as the him to be relegated to the role of Ibis summer and missed them all, Playhouse Down". quirky humour of songs like aging rockers performed a three rhythm guitarist. Yet oow is your chance to catch up. Much of the credit for crowd "Mikhail" and the controversial "I hour show spanning the band's Townshend's trademark windmill reaction is auributed tO the Reid's Beat My Cat", Hanes drew 25 year career. guitar chords and leap!l wP.rP. ~till mE PROCLAIMERS five-piece backing band. They groans as be sang "It (cat-beating) Beginning with a number of in abundance throughout the Who The Concert Hall, May 28 brought new life to the will all be over soon, my wife's selections from the rock opera classics and some of his own solo Scottish twins Craig and Proclaimer's early material expecting ... twins". Tommy, Roger Daltrey, Pete work, each one receiving a Olarlie Reid presented their ex­ featuring only Craig on vocals -Tony Burke Townshend, John Entwhistle, and gratifying cheer from the crowd. pllded Proclaimers to an eager and Charlie on guitar and their ten-piece backing band, cap­ Toronto, the sight of The )'OIIIlg crowd during their second harmonies. Violinist Steve THE WHO, The Kids Are Al­ tured the 60,000-member Who's "flnal" concert in 1982, uip to Toronto to promote their Short's dynamic playing com­ right Tour '89 audience. was the flrst stop on their 26 date !lest album, Sunshine On Leith pensated for vocalist Craig's lack Exhibition Stadium, June 24 While the hom players and sweep through North America. Dispensing with their "hits" of stage presence. back-up singers scraped the Will they be back here again to tarly in the show, The The concert culminated in an Darkness covered the concert trademark rough edges off The close their latest tour? "Toronto, Proclaimers made it clear that unlikely encore after only one bowl like a blanket. As the Who's early hits "Substitute" and we love you!", Townshend yelled ~ were here to please their ar­ hour. "Oh Jean", a sleeper from canned music faded, the capacity "I Can't Explain", their presence as the band left the stage ( crealc­ dent fans rather than to play for the Sunshine On Leith LP, proved crowd listened intently for the made it possible to play the crealc-crealc ), "We started here, ~casual listener. to be an incredible fmale as band band to ascend the stage ... band's more orchestrated work we'll fmish here!" Their latest single "I'm On and audience alike lost them­ such as "5:15" and "Love Reign And so we wait. My Way" and "Throw The 'R' selves within the orgasmic creak-creak-creak-creak O'er Me". -Tony Burke Away", from their debut album, qualities hidden in the song With Townshend's much TIW Is The Story, drew support which begins: "Oh Jean, you let Despite the wrinkles and in- publicized hearing problems, fans continued on pa1e 21 Kim Mitchell creates rock land at UW ~-at a glance-......

Thomas Szelbel On September 27, Lulu's promises an event hosting 27 universities. The en­ tertainment for the event is advertised as "Frozen Ghost and guests". The Kim Mitchell played for an show will be hosted by Muclunusic personality Dan GaUagher and joining enthusiastic audience at the Uni­ Frozen Ghost on stage will be GNP, a new band comprised of two former versity of Waterloo Village Green members of Saga. Tuesday afternoon. Mitchell and his band enter­ llirx:d the crowd of students for Coming soon to Laurier: Allanah Myles, The Razorback&, and David WU­ dose to 90 minutes in the hot cox. Dates are as yet to be conf11111ed and will be published as soon as they lflernoon sun with such are available. favourites as "Lager And Ale", 'Go For Soda", and "Patio lanterns". Songs from his latest I IN CONCERT I b, Rockland, also made an ~e including "Rock n' Sept. 14: Free WUJ (Rush clone) at the Highlands Roll Duty" and "Rockland­ Sept. 15: The Sons or Freedom at the Bombshelter wonderland". Under A Blood Red Sky at the Highlands Another highlight of the per­ Sept. 20: The Phantoms at Phil's Grandson's Place Sept. 22: National Velvet at the Bombshelter fmnance was the 3-man drum Sept. 22,23: Chubby Checker at Lulu's Roadhouse ~o which started off the show. Sept. 26: Shume Demons atTapp's The Canadian · rockers, dynamic as ever, maintained an ilfonnal, personal atmosphere. I NEXT WEEK I At one point, Mitchell invited a IIUdent on stage to. photograph die audience for him. In honour of Bugs Bunny's brrthday, The Scene presents a special After the show, Mitchell held look back at this wascally wabbit's contraversial career. 11 impromptu autograph and pho­ ~ph session for his fans. - - -~ =-~-~ - - .

The Cord Weekly Page 16... Thursday, September 14, 1989

News that the Global Televi­ Apocalypse Now: The sion Network in its well-nigh in­ Series: Bob Crane, fresh from fmite wisdom has decided not to Hogan's Heroes, stars as the show Later with Bob Costas happy-go-lucky army Major Mar­ anymore saddened me and an ex­ lowe, who is sent up the river to Cordie named Kirk Nielsen over track down the rebellious Colonel the past weekend. Kurtz (played by Werner But then we started speculat­ "Colonel Klink" Klemperer, also ing. What will Global replace the from Hogan's Heroes) who has Costas show with? Luckily, the established a Nazi Concentration president of Global turned out to Camp in the heart of the Viet be lying in the booze-soaked gut­ Nam jungle. Richard Dawson ter beside, and he proceeded to also stars as a burnt-out hippie enlighten us on some of the journalist who once fought for the shows Global is looking at En­ French Resistance but has peri­ joy! odic delusions of being a game The Mr. Chekhov Show: In show host due to too much mes­ this spin-off from the incredibly caline. popular Star Trek series, the beloved Mr. Chekhov is sent back Bernie and the Rap Boys: Mr. Chekhov ponders life at the to Star Fleet Academy after his Former Philadelphia Flyers goal­ Starfleet Academy. Russian-accented English starts tending great Bernie Parent stars galactic war between the Feder­ in this heartwarming sitcom in Moscow sanitation engineer can ation and the Klingon Empire. A which Bernie becomes the dean hear Stalin talking, and so the two clerical error gets Mr. Chekhov of an experimental hockey school have far-ranging discussions on Academy accommodations in the established in the heart of the Party doctrine while Stalin also women's dorm rather than the Brooklyn Bedford-Stuyvesant works to absolve himself by men's dorm, and hilarity results neighbourhood. Cultures clash as being the best sewer he can pos­ sibly be. Subtitled. as the high-spirited Russian Bernie tries to teach young ghetto works to maintain his disguise as youths an appreciation for the Later with Brian Mulroney: A hilarious collection of ftlm a female Betetgeusian while si­ fmer points of ice hockey, while clips and news reports, in all of multaneously carrying on affairs the youths in tum try to teach which the Prime Minister puts off with half of the female Star Fleet Bernie how to slam dunk and rap answering a tough question by class. with the best of them. OKTOBERFEST saying something totally unre­ at the TURRET OCT. 12, 13, & 14 The Bob Denver Power lated to the question asked. Hour: Having sunk so low that Stalin's Sewer: In this Rus­ Hosted by Mike Duffy's left they won't even let him on Holly­ Tickets on sale at the INFO-booth sian import patterned along My thigh. wood Squares or in McDonalds Mother, the Car--except the The Global president passed beginning September 25th, 1989 commercials anymore, the former Soviets actually did it ftrst--Josef out before he could tell us any Gilligan dons a codpiece and a Stalin returns to life as a sewer in more selections, but we're wait­ fright wig and hosts an informa­ punishment for his repressive ing eagerly for whatever the tive look at Heavy Metal video as network: decides to put on. it is regime. However, only a young

1st MOVIE NIGHT

B_U S T. t N T 0 M HOFFNIAN CRUISE RAIN MAN ~ I ''THE ::.r~:~;;:::.ApRiicatioJ;:·:=ij~~- being accepted·for I ON THE WALL1'

.·· ,.... BOARD ·OFGOVERNORS Granada is offering low monthly rates ELECTROHOME 20" REMOTE CONTROL I on all TV. VCR and Audio Systems. COLOUR TV (48CGII) REPRESENTATIVES PREFERRED Every student rental is backed by the ~ pia STUDENT RENTAL For more informatio'li".contact: I Granadacover service warranty, with Wil free loaners if it should require service. ELECTROHOME REMOTE CONTROL 2 HEAD, ultl 14 DAY, 8 EVENT VCR (HVRG90) Stuart Lewis in .theWLUSU offices And rental payments can be taken of PREFERRED Lui . D~adllne: Sepj~iTitier 22nd, 1989 I directly from your bank account. STUDENT RENTAL SJ9U:.... Just bring in your student card to cas PANASON1C REMOTE CONTROL AUDIO SYSTEM bri the nearest Granada store and take WITH TOWER SPEAKERS AND STAND (SC3037) av~ I advantage of the low monthly rental PREFERRED rates available for students. STUDENT RENTAL S28~:..,. hal

And get straight "A's" on TV 101. 'BASI!D 0~ A MINIMUM 3 MONTH REl'."TAL or I a ~ baf I res TVs ·Audio · VCRs ·Camcorders an< OUI I Dealing with #I has its advantages tim ------caJl Granada 1bday ------=--~--=------=---1 ly c r 623-9622 579-5900 836-3600 sm 561 Hespler Road 166 King Street \\est 135 Wyndham Street N. _j cor tcambOdse> (1\Jtct=er) (Guelph) ------(COmer of King & ~ (Across from l'l:lst OffiCe) it) The Cord Weekly Photo: Rob Saunders Page 17 ...Thursday, September 14, 1989 _,,'%"=>""' ~ ~ ~'*'~·r~~·M~ > ~ §I ~

I In a small town outside Beunos Ares, Argen­ tina, a little girl grows up scarred by the degradation of her class. Vowing to make a change for her fellow poor people, Evita uses her body to rise up the social ladder. A chance meeting with a young general named Peron leads to Evita's instatement as the first lady of Argentina at the age of 27. After years of helping the poor people in her coun­ try, Evita Peron dies at 33 of ovarian cancer. The legend of Evita lives on in Argentina to this day. Last of the VietNam war flicks Steve Burke Theatre Laurier is presenting the award-winning musical Evita for three nights only September 21, Last week, The Princess Cinema premiered what has··become the 22, 23. Directed by Theatre Laurier veteran Leslie this ruthless, ambitious, self-servmg woman definitive Viet Nam movie, hopefully the last in a series of self­ O'Dell (Godspell, A Midsummer Night's Dream), went out to the people of Argentina and manipu­ perpetuating, sensationalized exploitation flicks. the play combines the acting talents of students, lated them so that they all loved her but she really Directed by a war veteran, this pseudo-documentary puts the alumni, faculty, and staff to deliver a high-quality wasn't a good person. The other myth is that she audience into the jungle alongside a unit named 84 Charlie. The term musical production. was almost a saint. So what I did is to have Mo-pic, or moving picture, refers to the unseen figure equipped with O'Dell has brought her own touches to the show women on stage: one of whom is Evita and the a hand-held video camera who guides the viewer through the trees by capturing both aspects of Evita Peron's charac­ remaining three are mirrors; the reflections of and villages on a mission with half a dozen soldiers to create a "train­ ter: "I realised that there are all these stories about personality through time." ing film". ~r can her and they split apart: some of them show her as Daria Salemka stars as Evita Peron, and features Filmmaker Patrick Duncan strips down all the elements one com­ 1etwo Dennis Diemert as Magaldi and Bob Meilleur as es to expect from the VietNam film in favor of a realistic portrayal of ns on Che Guvera. Members of the audience will be the confusion and violence of the experience. Gone are the majestic 1 also treated to an intimate view of the play in the soundtrack and metaphysical, epic proportions of Coppola's !f by Theatre Auditorium's close seating arrangement "I Apocalypse Now. Duncan's soundtrack consists merely of yelling and ! pos- think with the sort of theatre this is," O'Dell says, gunflre. 84 Charlie MoPic seems to be shot in a backyard amidst a "and the sort of audience we attract, we offer in­ small cluster of trees. As with the soldiers, the audience does not see oney: the enemy. There is gunfire, then a fallen soldier who agonizingly film credible performances by very talented people and you get to sit real close. I think that the performers screams and squirms, then dies. au of Missing is the moral heavyhandedness of DePalma's Casualties !ts off will be as good as the show that was playing at the O'Keefe." of War and the patriotic tugging of the heart strings in Stone's r by Platoon. MoPic provides no narrative voice to pull the reader out of unre- Tickets for the production are on sale now at the Info Centre. the bush for periodic self-reflection. We are also spared the Sked. Photos: Tony Burke melodrama of Good Morning, VietNam that ruined what was sup­ left posed to be a comedy. 84 Charlie Mopic is perhaps closest to some elements of sed Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket, which also makes use of a documentary any style in introducing the characters and capturing their regression. wait­ Both films sacrifice plot to reveal the randomness of the casualties the and insanity of the entire war. Both could be set in any country at any time, as the historical and political framework becomes irrelevant. If 84 Charlie MoPic would have been made ten years ago, the "Viet Nam Experience" may have been exhausted and the movie­ going public may only have to be subjected to the post-war wound­ licking dramas such as The Deer Hunter and Jack.kJiife. Incidentally, the war is not over yet On the verge of release is the film adaptation of Bobby Ann Mason's In Country, a thought­ provoking novel about how the war's's dead affect the living, in a society still struggling to understand itself. The project is in the deft hands of Canadian director Norman Jewison, although the ftlm stars Bruce Willis as the mistreated, maladjusted veteran. Hopefully, what promises to be the definitive Viet Nam aftermath film will sew up the wounds and seal up the vault on the whole parasitic business -- business being the operative wont.

I I The Autonomy of Criticism

Family Feud a delightful mix of centre-stage in what becomes a upon the eye and can stir some Fans of Japanese director tum up again in DePalma's The I cinematic styles. farcical theatre of the absurd. negative emotions. Kurosawa may find a not Untouchables in the train station Some perceptive critics may pick Another intentional an­ uninteresting parallel in plot to segment. Surely, Family Feud's I Former comic Ray Combs up on the Italian Nco-realism and noyance is the theme on the the Oscar-winning Rashomon, in director is indebted to Hitchcock plays to perfection the pathetic, just a whisper of French New soundtrack, which can be played which subjective responses are for the use of his trademark Mac­ wimpy host in this hilarious and Wave cinema (Truffaut's Shoot only sparingly at moments of tested to determine the truth be­ Guffin, that plotting device that I ultimately disturbing masterpiece the Piano Player comes to mind) high tension, so as to let the hind a rape and murder. Similar­ sets the events in motion, yet is it­ of satire made in the vein of in the awkwardness and banality viewer appreciate its ridiculous­ ly, the Feud's families provide self insignificant Building upon a Lumet's Network. The supporting of Chaplin-like Combs' banter ness without being accustomed to subjective responses to such device Hitchcock could only take I cast of cardboard characters is with his guests. These interna­ it as an acceptable piece of music. dilemmas as "Name a common so far, the director of Feud man­ brilliantly understated - "two tional influences are also hinted As the plot unfolds and the shape of a fridge magnet", "Name ages to make the entire plot to his average American families" who at by the fact that the feature is audience (a convincing crew of something that smells bad that feature a MacGuffm. The great I happen to be a group of doctors shot in real time, without intercut­ extras with apparently no stage you wouldn't want to touch with irony here is that the five lawyers or lawyers, yet neither can reach ting and fast-paced editing in or­ background who, I might add, your tongue" and "Pick a number could have made twice as much a consensus on the number of der to emphasize the tedium of virtually steal the show) laughs between 3 and 5". money if they had spent the last I bathrooms contained within their the show's opening segment aloud at Combs' witty repartee, In the hilarious (albeit pre­ 30 minutes in their offices. respective households. The set design, however, is the viewer becomes gradually dictable) climax, the family of Family Feud leaves the Shades of Kubrickian irony pure inspiration; again owing aware of where the director is five lawyers wins a jackpot worth viewer with as many questions as I and absurdity are strewn through­ largely to Kubrick. Clearly, the heading, but not before a very $10,000 to divide amongst itself it asks its contestants. Is it a sca­ out an admittedly short running harsh use of primary colours - the disturbing parallel to the and two dozen friends and rela­ thing commentary on capitalist time of 30 minutes with extreme­ ketchup-red carpet, the banana­ psychological conditioning tives that barge onto the set. The greed? Is it a cinematic who's I ly entertaining results. The sterile, yellow backdrop and the sky-blue Kubrick tells of in A Clockwork frantic scene on the stage's steps who - a veritable smorgasbord of snail-paced cinematography is so walls - when combined with the Orange. I am referring of course is reminiscent of a similar chaotic celluloid? Is it an end-of-th~line completely cold and clinical that bland and boring symmetry of the to Family Feud's buzzer-slapping episode in Ei~~nstein's Battleship job for a washed-up comic? it places the television viewer at set pieces has a displeasing effect scenes. Potempkin- a segment that would You watch it. You decide. The Cord Weekly Page 18 ...Thursday, September 14, 1989

of great albums; Dave Wakeling their finest album with style and and Ranking Roger are pursuing in the , Merritt has integrity that can be found many years to prove his strengths. behind solo careers, and Dave Steele and nowhere else. The Proclaimers Andy Cox comprise two thirds of have since gone on to acquire a Deceased British popsters the Fine Young Cannibals. full piece band to interpret their The Housemartins, debuted on The Cannibals are enjoying music. It will never be the same. the album charts with London 0, ,' ''tne ··: s~ene'' huge success with their latest al­ Through the course of this ar­ Hull 4 to outstanding reviews. bum The Raw and The Cooked ticle I have praised performers for Great songs like "Happy Hour", but, artistically, the trio's first al­ In recent years it has been tra­ new breed of ska bands. The Spe­ their folk based sound. Well, now "Anxious", and "Think For A dition for the new Scene editor to cials released an impressive self­ bum far outshines their latest ef­ I present to you a folkie who is Minute" propelled the band to su­ commandeer space in the section titled LP produced by Elvis fort. The singles "Johnny Come not a folkie: Scott Merritt. With perstar status in England while to enter into a masturbation on Costello that brought them chart Home" and "Suspicious Minds" his music becoming progressively barely making a dent in North the recvrdings which have success with "A Message To brought Cox, Gift, and Steele into less folk and more and more hard America Alas, denying the changed h.s/her life. As I have You, Rudy" and "Gangsters". the limelight but the whole album to classify, Merritt reached a limelight, The Housemartins dis­ nothing t"l.se for me to shpeel is a masterpiece. Unlike The Raw plateau with his third album: solved. Their music remains their about this week, I'll keep that tra­ And The Cooked, arrangements Gravity Is Mutual. Produced by legacy. dition alive again this year. on the debut were kept to a mini­ Roma Baran and aided and Well, there you have it: an an­ First of all, I am not going to mum with Cox' James Brown­ abetted by famed guitar wizard noyingly long blatant ftller. Next include in this list the works of style guitar work figuring pre­ Adrian Belew, Merritt's record is week maybe I'll have some time such notables as The Beatles, dominantly in the mix. And, of a masterpiece in music and to write something worth reading Pink Floyd, or Samantha Fox course, Roland Gift's vocals were poetry. While still a minor force (hint: I need writers!). because everything has been said stunning. about their incredible accom­ The Colour Field, another plishments in popular music. In­ post-ska revival band, has yet to stead I will focus on the music I achieve the success that the Can­ 200 Unluerslty Ruenue West nibals enjoy. Ex-Specials vocalist Woter1oo, Ontor1o N2l 3G1 have personally encountered and Cf

I Ct\~ CHA cft .. 0- 4 1 \ We at the Cord Weekly are looking for a few good people. _f) __..

People who aspire to the 1 1 cALL 884-2990 oR dROP controversial. by 2nd fLOOR SUB People who care about their school. aSK for eddie Winning People. Classy People. I So, don't be like Edwin on the ~o- FOR A LIMITED right here who doesn't care TIME ONLYI much about other than his good hAVE your rESUME looks. cUSTOM dESIGNED by Come up to the Cord on the 2nd U.T.& T. and Floor of the Joe Bystricki rECEIVE yOUR fiRST Secure Student Centre (Student 5 COPIES Union Building) and ask for Chris! ~ • CALL FoR MoRE DETAILS OFFER VALID FROM ,.. ------SEPT. 18 TO OCT. 1 _j The Cord Weekly Page 19 ... Thursday, September 14, 1989

IS s. s The Grapes of Wrath discover their niche h guitar-dominated effort which One of the many criticisms of With Batman, the Prince of Pur­ male vocallstslkeyboardlsts, a ~ . '· doesn't fall prey to cliches, postur­ Jackson Is that he's adept at too ple Rain and 1999 Is back. Prince's punk-lnfiuenced guitarist (ex­ ' Ing or lyrical pomposity. Another many styles or music, a bonehead most viscerally satisfying album In Exploited member John Duncan), a big plus Is the fact that there aren't criticism somewhat akin. to chiding years, this Is amazing sturr. "Bat­ smooth, yet powerful, lead vocalist, " any ballads on this album -- the someone for knowing too many lan­ dance", the witty mixture of a skinhead bassist, and a socially e fact that every ballad ever re­ guages. sampled dialogue from the Batman conscious lyricist/drummer, Good­ h corded by a heavy metal group be­ - Jonathan Stover movie and sampled pieces of the bye Mr. Mackenzie veer from eI comes a hit single, even though the other eight songs on this collection, being a tightly orchestrated hard­ lyrics usually border on the Insipid Is a condensed version of the movie. edged unit to a disjointed bizarre ("Every Rose Has It's Thorn"? tr The afore-mentioned other eight mix ofindlvldual sounds. "You're My Angel"? Give me a songs are guitar-funk gems, from a break!) doesn't bode well for the lovely duet ("The Arms Of Orion") Haled as Scotland's best live collective Intelligence of popular with Sheena Easton to a host of band before they were committed music afficlanados. nasty crunchers (prime among to vinyl, Mack appear to have lost Anyway, there's a cut produced them "The Future" and "Lemon their more aggressive sound on Now And Then by Mlck Jagger here, there's a Crush"). The album mirrors the their assay into the studio. Martin The Grapes Of Wrath cover (!) of a song movie, juggling accessibility and Metcalfe's vocals are too promi­ which Is knock-em-down great, style with rare panache. Batman nent in the mix and the keyboard there are fine songs like "Cult of has muscle It rarely has to use. sounds are so polished that they By this time the single "All The Personality" and "Which Way To - Jonathan Stover dreadfully orr-set the potent guitar Things I Wasn't" has been played America?" -- and there's enough work. to death on radio stations and zippy guitar and drum work for \ideo shows. The song, a beautiful any summer's day. A really good One area were Goodbye Mr. blend of acoustic guitar and or­ album. Mackenzie excel Is in their lyrical chestration, Is just a preview of the - Jonathan Stover domain where each song Is present­ quality Inherent In the Grapes' Batman ed in a unique story-telling format. music. Prince "" Is a damning of A great leap from their pre­ Paisley Park blind machismo; the anthemlc: vious album, the Tom Cochrane "Goodbye Mr. Mackenzie" Is a pic­ ture or nuclear desolation. "Face produced Tree House, The Grapes Prince Is a genius. Tepid dilu­ Of Wrath seem to have discovered tions of the Purple One like George To Face" Is a severe representation their own unique sound with Now Michael and Bobby Brown sold of an act of rape whose lyrics And Again. On this record, The tens of millions or albums the past speak, quite harshly, for them­ Grapes Of Wrath have tried to few years while Prince turned out selves: "in silence she sits I With the scars on her wrists I She's never separate their lnfiuences. Acoustic albums -- Kiss, Sign 0' The Times alone I Those laughing eyes I Make songs like "I'm Gone" and "But I and Lovesexy -- that were at once Guess We'll Never Know" cement troubling and great, charting a her clench her fiSts I For the blood and the sperm I Still run down her leg their folk classification while path away from the hugely success­ "Stay" and "Do You Want To Tell ful blend or hard rock and funk he Good Deeds And Dirty Rags I Like it did that night." Me" bring out their more powerful Goodbye Mr. Mackenzie had brought to a then-apotheosis As a whole, Good Deeds And edge. All while retaining their own Blaze Of Glory with Purple Rain. With Lovesexy, be Capitol Records Dirty Rags Is a good debut. With style. Joe Jackson seemed a funkier modern-day John Lyrically, the direction of the A&MRecords better production tbls band could Donne, mixing sex and religion Into This new Scottish band betray go far. band remains the same, that Is, a a beady, apocalyptic brew. But their eclecticism both musically -Tony Burke focus on everyday Interpersonal The guy knows how to write a with Batman? and visually. Comprised of two fe- human relationships. Kevin Kane's song; He's a great pro-· vocals are superb and, In combina­ ducerlarranger -- the horns and the tion with new resident keyboard whistles and the bells are all here, player Vincent Jones, songs like "I artfully Interwoven with the gui­ Can Tell" will raise The Grapes to tars and the drums and the vocals. new heights of popularity. So why don't his albums sell zil­ Burke lions of copies? Because alot of KOH-1-N.OOR people are stupid? FOR BEST INDIAN CUSINE ~ I'm not going to answer that one. There are six great songs on Established in the U.K. and Montreal Curry, Tandori and this album, and only one of the rest (the tediously pedantic "Evil Vegetarian dishes are our specialty. Empire") Is a stinker. The SPECIAL 3 COURSE LUNCH : MON - FRI 11:30 - 2:00pm anthemlc "Tomorrow's World" which kicks things orr on side one Licence Applied for. Served: English and German Beer bas Jackson In fine form, balanced on tap. on a knlfe-edgt; between sarcastic cynicism and wide-eyed optimism 1Oo/o Discount with student ID card parking at rear without falling over either way as the lyrics tell us about the wonders C)_ 338 King st. E. possible In the future ("Have you ever seen so many stars in the sky I ~ TEL: 745- 3600 e& So many we can't even see I Im­ agine we're In the middle of a gal­ axy I Imagine how many blazing Mon. - Sat. 11 :30 am - 2:30 pm stars there'd be I They're gonna build a rocket ship to take us there 5:00pm -11:00 pm Vivid Is a rarity -- a grinding, I Soon."). Sunday 5:00 pm - 11 :00

Learn About WLU's UNIX COMPUTER

General Sessions For Everyone 1. Introduction to UNIX 2. UNIX Workshop 3. Text Formatting with nroff/troff 4. SPSSX and other Statistical Packages 5. UNIX Word Perfect, Qcalc Please consult the machine room BULLETIN BOARD for the date and time of each session. Sessions will be offered frequently during the next several weeks and announced on a weekly basis. The Cord Weekly Page 20... Thursday, September 14, 1989 Aslice of the summer concert scene revisited continued from page 21 looking and he doesn't seem too The lights suddenly shone BRUCE COCKBURN The Rolling Stones Steel Wheels 65,000 fans cheered and stomped extremely talented on the guitar. bright; the guitar was rocking; Centre in the Square/May until the Rolling Stones came What he does have is royalties Tour'89 "Start Me Up" was playing: the back to play a great rendition of Legendary Canadian song­ from 16 million Bat albums, a Exhibition Stadium, September 3 Stones were here. Surprisingly "Jumpin' Jack Flash". writef-.performef-.activist Bruce great set of lungs and a stage enough, very few of the songs Cockburn brought his three-man vitality that's infectious. Mr. Loaf from their new Steel Wheels were After it was over, we left the Considered to be one of the show to town in May and his is rock and roll personified. played. They weren't here to pro­ building with ears ringing and best bands in the world,The Roll­ faithful fandom left the show The show was horrifically mote the new album or to make a hearts pounding. Some of the ing Stones proved their title quite well-satisfied. opened by Those Damn Yankees. quick buck, but only to play the highlights of the three-hour show convincingly on this night ftlled Cockburn's act was made for They are a heavy metal "cover great songs everyone has learned included the spectacular light with purple skies and 65,000 fans the living-room like atmosphere and about four originals that all to love, laugh, cry, and party show; the inflatable women, who got their 'satisfaction'. of the Centre. His show is not sound the same" band from De­ with. reaching two hundred feet tall, flashy; he sings and strums and troit that should be thrown from "Satisfaction", "Ruby Tues­ during "Hooky Tonk Woman": the stickman and drummer play The show opened with some­ day", and "Paint It Black" were and, of course, Cheech and uninspired background noise. the Ambassador Bridge at low what of a disappointment when played to perfection and everyone Chong. Stick MacDonald's usually solid tide. They did manage to make the opening act, Living Color, who could stand sang and danced • Chad Newsome bass lines muddled several songs, the crowd anxious for the Meaty could not be heard as a result of with the band. It ended as all though, but no-one seemed to One, though. the noise made by late comers care too terribly. Meat started the set with two struggling to ftnd their seat The concert took place at the songs from the Bat Out Of Hell II Despite that, this up-and-coming height of the popularity of the album, with "Masquerade" show­ band did a great job of pumping single "If A Tree Falls" and the ing the most promising airtime up the crowd for the show they crowd responded to that piece potential. "All Revved Up With carne here to see. with great enthusiasm. The No Place To Go" lasted twenty highlight of the night, however, minutes due to the schlocky on­ As the stage was transformed was Cockburn appearing alone on stage ministrations of Loaf and between the acts, the thousands of stage for "Stoneland", a song his mini-skirted back-up singer. impatient, irritable and excited dealing with the plight of Native If there were any complaints to fans sat and waited. With the time Canadians, accompanied only by be made about the show, it would to sit and twiddle my .thumbs, I a haunting war-drum beat on a be the annoying "she loves me, gazed around in amazement to hand skin drum. she loves me not" tete-a-tete that notice Cheech and Chong, fifty­ - Chris Starkey went on between the two during year-old Stones trekkies from the some of the songs, and also that 60's, sitting at my right, and "Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad" hundreds of Harley Davidson MEAT LOAF,The Anything For was omitted. dudes poking fun at the horse on A Meal Tour '89 It was a fun show, though, as the front of my shirt. Stages, August 8th Meat let the rest of the band take a verse singing the encore Meat Loafs popularity has al­ "Johnny B. Goode". Even the ways puzzled me. The Bat Out Of roadie got to sing. Meat Loaf is Hell album is on my top ten list definitely a must-see for Bat Out of all time, but he didn't do any­ Of Hell fans. He'd be a natural LSAT thing else of consequence. He's for a Turret night disgustingly fat, he's not good- • Chris Starkey GMAT ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• • : 'Ihe answers to this movie : Prep courses • • for the: 5 quiz 5 September 23rd are amystery to me LSAT • • • by Steve Burke • October 14th • Fill in the answers to the quiz below and drop them off In the box at the • • Cord offtces by noon Monday. The entry with the most correct answers • GMAT • wUl receive two free passes to The Princess Cinema. Premiering this week : Call: an Australian mystery titled WarmNighls On A Slow Moving Train • :Is (416) 923-PREP (7737) • 1. Who is directing and starring in The Two Jakes, the sequel to the 60's film • or • noir classic China Town? • 1-800-387-5519 : 2. In Chinatown, what did John Huston drop in the pond that incriminated : .~? • • 3. In Sidney Lumet's Agatha Christie-like Death Trap, what unusual thing • for information and ••did Michael Caine do to Christopher Reeve towards the end of the f,l... !l • starting dates :4. What building is the setting for the black and white court room classic Wit- : •ness For The Prosecution? • ••5. What were the mimes doing m the last scene ol Antonioni's Blow-up? • : 6. The creator of the comedy Raising Arizona made a tribute to ~e film noir : • genre based on the phenomenon of "a state of confusion that follows the • •commission of murder". What is that movie's title? • :7. In Hitchcock's The Lady Vanishes, what is the occupation of the lady? :

: 8. In The Jagged Edge, what color suit did Glenn Close tell her client Jeff : YOU'VE NEVER HAD • Bridges to wear in court to help~ win the jury's favour? • PIZZA DELIVERED •9. What was the name of Robert DeNiro's devilish character in the film : :Angel Heart? • SO ... FRESH •10. What do the island residents do to Edward Woodward at the end of The • SO ... • Wickerman? • HOT • • SO ... FAST <-- :Name: Phone: :

••In the event that there II more than one set of correct answers, a draw will be held by the • • Scene editor. Results will be polled In the Cord omce and In next week'a Issue. • •Answers to last week's quiz: • : 1. King Lear 6. 1948 : • 2. Orange 7. Dune • DON'T WAIT 30 MINUTES • 3. Blade Runner 8. Arthur C. Clarke • • 4. Martin Scorcese 9. Apocalypse Now • "WE'RE ALREADY ON THE WAY" • S. Handmaid's Tale 10. The Dead • •Last week's winner of a year's membership to the Princess Cinema: • MON.·WED. 11 ;00 a.m. · 7:00p.m. • THUAS.·SAT. 11 00 a.m. · 1 ~oo am. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••:Michael Wert : The Cord Weekly Page 21...Thursday, September 14, 1989

lped First loss to Mac since '84

~the and Football Hawks Marauded p he ~ow light nen, CHRIS STARKEY Cord Weekly going to tak:e a lot of tlak for this, The Marauders rang in the tall, but every one of his receivers second quarter by burning Jon an"; It wasn't a pretty sight. dropped a ball on him." Tavares with a 42-yard sideline and Receivers coach Joe pass down to the 1-yard line. In what what supposed to be a Nastasiuk concurred, mostly After stopping D' Agnostino and win, albeit not a gimme, the blaming inexperience on the poor quarterback Anthony Alfano, run­ WLU Golden Hawk football team performance. "We had mostly ning back Claudio Silvestri broke were thrashed 31-8 by the first-game receivers out there.. .it a tackle and twisted in for six McMaster Marauders. It marked was like playing high school guys points. The Jason Beer convert the ftrst time since 1984 that in the OUAA." made it 14-0 with 11:50 to go in WLU has gone down to defeat at "It's still no excuse for the half. the hands of the Hambletonians. dropped balls," added Nastasiuk. WLU was still without a frrst "When it con:es right down to The Hawks got burned in the down at this point, but an 11-yard it, they caught the ball and we ftrst quarter on a 44-yard scamper trundle by Jankovic moved the didn't". said offensive co­ through the heart of the defence sticks on the next play. Un­ ordinator Tom Amott. The Hawk by game MVP Tony fortunately for the Hawks, Mac Mac kicker Jason Beer booted a duck into the hands of Mike Bull. comer backs were burned on D'Agnostino. The ftesty 5'4" tail­ defensive back Doug Steringa 30-yarder at with 3:38 to give the A questionable conduct call three ftrst-half sideline passes for back led Mac with 133 yards on picked off a Mackenzie pass after home side a 24-0 lead going into against Hawk centre Brian Breck­ big gains, and WLU quarterback the ground. Reid had lost his footing on the the dressing room. les on Bull's return pushed the Ian Mackenzie ftnished the game Turnovers on the next two Les Prince turf. Laurier needed some life to Marauders even further back and with 8 out of 26 passes completed possessions kept the Hawks at On the ensuing Mac drive, start any kind of comeback, and set up a 25-yard Beer field goal. for only 85 yards. McMaster also bay. Fullback Brian Jankovic Marauder receivers got by comer­ on their second possession, the Two unsuccessful third-down picked off three WLU passes. fumbled after the Mac major and backs Tony Wilson and Tim spark came in the form of tail­ gambles and two Mac intercep­ Head Coach Rich Newbrough a Mackenzie offering intended for Bisci for 23 and 21 yards, with back Andy Cecchini. Cecchini tions in the final six minutes hesitated putting the blame on the Doug Reid was intercepted. The Ray Martino hauling down the rushed twice and caught a pass sealed the Hawks• fate. A too­ passing game on any one man's ftrst quarter ended in a 7-0 latter throw for the third con­ for 51 yards total to bring the many-men call against WLU with shoulders, though. "Mackenzie's McMaster lead. verted touchdown of the day. Hawks to a ftrst down on the Mac one minute to go set up the final 1. lVlackenzie finished off the trey by Beer, this one a 36-yarder. drive from there and hit wideout Despite the fact that there are Neil Chin on the left side for the seven games left, the loss was two-point conversion. crucial to Laurier's playoff With a 2nd and 1 situation, a aspirations. Without some help great defensive stop by Doug from other teams, the Hawks will Sharp forced a Mac punt, but the be hard-pressed to secure first or return was dropped by Barry second, and even a playoff posi­ Hughes on the WLU 35. The next tion is now in jeopardy.

"We had mostly first-game receivers out there .. .it was like playing high school guys in the OUAA."

Laurier punt return was also A must-win situation will dropped, but the Adam Smith present itself in this Saturday's fumble was recovered. 2:00 home opener against the Amott called the special York Yeomen, who were downed teams' play "horrendous" and at­ by the Guelph Gryphons last tributed it to the fact that the week. The coaching staff admits Hawks had yet to play an exhibi­ that the Yeomen are pretty much tion game to work on this aspect a mystery. Amott pointed out that of their game. The only bright York always gives the Hawks spot of the special teams was the trouble, and Newbrough expects punting of Mackenzie, who aver­ a good defensive effort from the aged 36.8 yards per kick, includ­ team that ftnished 1-6 last season. ing a 49-yarder. Newbrough was asked if it The fourth quarter was aca­ would take more than eight points Those pesky Marauders kept slipping past our once fabled defense last Saturday in Hamilton. The host demic. After the Marauders went to beat York. The reply? McMaster squad could do no wrong while our Golden Hawks could do no right Cord photos by Chris­ up 25-8 on a missed 26-yarder, "Yep." Starkey Mackenzie threw a wounded

CHRIS STARKEY --r.ord Weekly

~NDSOR16-TORONT011 The Blues edged out the Lancers last year for the fourth and final playoff spot, but it was to be Windsor's hance for revenge this week as a late touchdown by Ozzie Nethersole gave the Lancers (3-4 last year) lthe win. Toronto (3-3-1 in 1988) was led by the rushing exploits of Lome King, whose 122 yard effort was !highlighted by a 72-yard touchdown run. Nethersole was the game-high runner with 145 yards.

!GUELPH 36 -YORK 19 The Yeomen, who finished at 1-6 last season, put up a good first half effort against the OUAA pre­ iseason favourites (4-1-2 in '88), trailing by only three points at half. Gryphon quarterback Mike Shoemaker was sacked six times, but by the second half the hits awakened lthc vaunted Guelph aerial attack. Shoemaker finished the game with 313 yards and four TO's in complet­ ing 18 of his 25 passes... . WESTERN 40 - WATERLOO 10 The Waterloo Warriors, winless in their last 31 games, showed that the much-ado over last week's scrim­ mage "win" over Laurier was nothing in getting pounded by the defending OUAA Yates Cup (6-0-1) 1champs. Mustang quarterback Chris Gaffney hooked up with wide receiver Tyrone Williams for 158 of his 258 passing yards and one of three touchdown strikes. The Chartier boys led the way for UW, Tom rushing for 68 yards and Gene scoring the Warriors' TO. The Cord Weekly Page 22... Thursday, September 14, 1989

ONTARIO UNIVERSITIES' APPLICATION CENTRE Rugby Hawks rucking off to Brock for opener C.ntre de Rtc.pt~onclel DefMndH d'Admllllon .ua UnlwnltH dei'Ontafto

rules size and force of the serums will be de­ APPLYING TO MEDICAL SCHOOL? Dan Howe emphasized. This will enable the teams to use Special to the Cord smaller and more mobile backs. However these BR! changes were not designed to detract from the tm original strength aspect of the game. The feeling on this year's varsity rugby team is Applications all Ontario Medical This year's crop of forwards for the varsity /01' optimism. squad have a good combination of strength and Schools must be received by the The feeling among players and coaches is so mobility. The Hawks will have Gord Young and Ontario Medical Schools Application Service strong they feel they can finish first in their divi­ Jamie Dol returning to solicit the intimidation tac­ sion. They have reason to believe in themselves tics required from a strong group of forwards. In (OMSAS) on Ol'befOTe November 1, 1989, with ten of fifteen starting members of last year's addition, 1987 OUAA all-star Doug Purdy will be /01' Fall 1990 Admissions. second place team returning. back to solidify the backs. This year's training camp saw over twenty five The loss of Neal Gratton at fly half to gradu­ FOI' applications write to: rookies trying out for five open spots on the team. ation will definitely hurt the Golden Hawk cause. Several first year men have looked promising and Currently three players are vying to fill the void. have the potential of cracking a solid line-up on the Eric Clarke, Mark Struyk and James Beamish are O.M.S.AS. varsity team. None of the players are slated to be battling for the starting role. Veterans Ian Allison P.O.Box 1328 released from the rugby program. Those not catch­ and Dan Howe return to lead the young troupe in ing on with the senior squad club will see time with aggressive running. Both players had strong sum­ GUELPH, Ontario the second team. mer seasons and are ready to open the new N1H7P4 Returning head coach Wayne Lloyd is joined campaign. If all of these players can combine hard this year by Laurier veteran Jim Woodstock. Lloyd tackling and powerful running with sure hands they will be handling the coaching duties for the varsity should be the one of the most effective line of side while Woodstock will be in charge of the club backs in the OUAA. team. Both feel the talent on this year's varsity In order for this team to be successful they must team will propel them to a division title. attend all practices and games with a desire to win. Letters to the Editor In order for this to happen the team must begin Discipline is also key for players to remain out of the season with fervor. Their first two games of the the penalty column. Fitness is also important to the 1989 campaign will be on the road so the club will players as university rugby requires a high degree be tested early before they return to the friendly of strength and endurance. If the Hawks can in­ confines of Lexington Park where they went on­ corporate all of these aspects of team play they can defeated last year. fmish first in the division. From there anything can Got a problem? There will be several changes to this year uni­ happen. Don't Gripe... versity rugby program. Since last year the OUAA Their first regular season game is at Brock Uni­ governing body has modified several rules to assist versity Saturday September 16. Game time is 1:00 the smaller players in the league. Under the new p.m. Baseball through rose coloured glasses

Travis McHaggis and would fmally end when Dave Jesus, what a ballgame! Sports Commentary Stieb's arm falls off in the 28th After such a mighty fit of inning and the Jays have to forfeit dreaming and speculation, I had I asked myself the most press­ the game due to lack of pitchers. to rest on a less strenuous bit of ing sports questions of the stuffing. So I said to myself century the other day, but even I, The seventh game sees Mauro "What if basketballs were Travis McHaggis, found permuta­ square?" tions and sheer nuttiness in the "Goose" Gozzo battle the Bam­ answers I entertained. bino himself -- who was a Hell of a pitcher for the Boston Red Sox between 1917 and 1920, you For instance, what would hap­ might recall. Babe gets the flrst Well, that made me think a bit pen if the 1927 New York run of the game himself, pound­ about a lot of guff and stuff -­ Yankees played the 1989 Toronto ing a singleton off Goose in the stuff like why water spiders don't Blue Jays? Putting aside the fact fifth. It stays that way until the swim around in the middle of the that most of the 1927 Yankees are eighth, when Georgie Bell Atlantic Ocean. Is it due to lack dead right now, and thus might responds in kind with a shot to of prey, or is it because of surface fmd it a wee bit difficult to field a left that just clears the Skydome tension problems with big waves, team, I thought about such a clash wall. l asked myself, before remember­ of potent sports titans. ing that I was supposed to be writing sports commentary and And then the ninth. The not a bleedlin' Mr. Wizard If we took the 1927 Yankees Yankees are up in the top of in­ science piece. as they are now, for instance, we ning. It's do or die! The first two would have to, out of fairness, pit Yankee batters go out striking them against the 12-24 early sea­ against Tom Henke, whose fast­ son Blue jays, in which case the ball is burning up oxygen atoms ghost of Babe Ruth would wallop like a son of a bitch. Lou Gehrig So I reflected on soccer for a the bloody Jimy Williams Jays all hits a bloop single over Nelson bit, but that soon put me to sleep, around the ball park and out into Liriano's head, and then takes because soccer is like a big dose the cow pasture for breakfast. second on a stolen base when of Nytol for old Travis McHagjs, who hates to be bored 1927 Yankees in five. Whitt bobbles a Henke pitch to Ruth. when there's bettel' things to be done and God knows soccer is what must be the most bloody But if we take the 1927 boring sport in the whole world, Yankees circa 1927, then it's a Yep, the Babe's up. The count and that's no lie, nosirree Bob! different ballgame, Chuck. Oh, goes to 3-2, and then Babe hits a what a contest it would be! Lou towering shot to centerfield. Gehrig and Babe Ruth -- the Mookie Wilson goes up -- he whole bleedin' Murderers' Row catches it! The Jays are out of the Anyway, them's my sports of that fabled team that won 110 inning! Holy Vermiculite! speculations for this week. If ballgames and beat the living shit Now it's the Jays tum. Lloyd you've got any questions or com­ out of the Pittsburgh Pirates -­ Moseby ekes out a single against ments or any great sports what-ifs versus the wondrous Georgie Bell the Babe, and then moves to sec­ you'd like to see Mrs. McHaggis' and the splendid Mookie Wilson! ond as the Bambino walks pinch­ least favorite child take a plow­ Oy vey, what a contest it would hitter Lee Mazzilli. Then it's man's wallop at, be sure to write be! Freddy McGriff up. A fastball or call in the the Cord Weekly, The way I see it, the Jays down the pipes, but Babe's pitch­ where I'll sure to be hospitable would win this contest in seven ing isn't what it was when he and the like. games, five of which would go to won 20 games in the early 1920s. extra innings and one of which -­ Freddy takes the babe downtown the fifth -- would go 27 innings and the Jays win. Excelsior! The Cord Weekly sports------Page 23 ... Thursday, September 14, 1989 er Women kick Yankee butt on weekend 1e de- 'o use these BRIAN OWEN necticut State College winning they downed Quinnipiac, Univer­ The team left last Thursday was present the game before. n the tord Weekly three of four exhibition games. sity of Conneticut and Trinity for a ten hour jaunt to Conneticut "They were tired and couldn't Coach Syed Mohammed, who College in a four game tune up and played their first game on move the ball against Yale, it ;arsity The Lady Soccer Hawks put was one of two drivers to the series. Their only loss was to a Friday against Quinnipiac. really was a tough game for the n and in a fine exhibition last weekend games, was extremely elated with strong Yale University on Satur­ players." Rookie and apparently g and when they travelled to Con- the performance of his team as day September 9. soon to be scoring sensation Kel­ n tac­ LAURIER 4 Quinnipiac 1 ly Konstantinou replied for the ds. In Lady Hawks. Coach Mohammed !ill be The Lady hawks didn't show remarked that she has been a wel­ any signs of travel fatigue for comed improvement to the poadu­ their game on Friday against women's soccer program at eause. Quinnipiac University. The for­ Laurier. "She will add a real void. ward line of Loreen Paulo, Tanya punch to the scoring, she has ih are Rusynyk and new-comer Kelly been a major addition to the lison Konstantinou recorded all four team." Along with Konstantinou, 1pe in goals for the win. Konstantinou sweeper Nina Orescanin had an sum­ who was elected MVP of the excellent game and was voted new game by coach Mohammed MVP for Laurier in the loss. ~hard tallied twice for the Lady Hawks. they Paulo and Rusynyk had one each e of in the effort. Mohammed was LAURIER 2 Conneticut State very happy by the fact that the College 0 must forward line played extremely ~win. well and accounted for all of the The Lady Hawks played their out of scoring. It was their first time to­ second game of the day against b the gether as whole unit this season. the State College winning by a 2- Iegree Paulo had missed the exhibition 0 margin. Their opponents were tn in­ game the previous week at Bec­ 1988 regional Third Division !Y can htel Park and Konstantinou was champions and compiled a 14-0-2 tgcan tf. injured. " It was their first time record for last year. Rusynyk and ·~~- playing together as a line, they Konstantinou had the Lady Hawk Uni- worked well as a forward unit." markers. Blair Fowlie was named 1:00 said Mohammed. MVP for the winning side. The Lady Hawks begin their LAURIER 1 YALE 3 1989 schedule at home this weekend when they face the Saturday's action saw the Waterloo Athenas 2:00 pm at Lady Hawks go down to defeat at Bechtel Park. They then travel to 'Now listen girls .... we must head to the Duke for a pint after the game or you're all benched." Coach the hands of Yale University 3-1. London for a 1:00 pm match fit 0 Syed Mohammed may have uttered these words to the Lady Hawks during a brief moment at Bachtel According to Mohammed the against the always tough Western j had Park ... or he just be giving out advice, the world may never know. team lacked the enthusiasm that Mustangs. bit of iyself Iwere

Times Are Changing! t a bit We offer a university ff -- Catch The Times In The education and a caieer to make the ace KEYSTONE~ t 990 ves, most of it. 1ber­ THE YEARBOOK OF THE Dbe Ask about the Canadian Forces . and izard WILFRID LAURIER UNIVERSITY Regular Officer n"aining Plan for Men and Women. • have your education paid tor by the Canadian Forces at a Canadian military college or a mutually selected or a Canadian university upon acceptance. .eep, • receive a good income. tuition. books and supplies. dental dose On Sale the last week of and health care and a month's vacation it your training bvis schedule allows. )()red • choose trom a large selection of 1st-year programs. September~ • have the opportunity to participate in a number of sporting ~~ and cultural activities. oody • on graduation. be commissioned as an officer and begin ~rid, work in your chosen field. Choose a Career, $25.00 Live the Adventuze. For more in1ormation on plans. entry requirements ~ r~ and opportunities. visit the recruiting centre nearest com­ A small price to pay for a you or call collect - we're in the Yellow fuges"' at-ifs underRecnrlting. • lggis' >low- piece of the legacy. t~~table TIMES ARE CHANGING Sol sT l-EY FMlXK. Clio< l5 01.1'. l'lD lll\10 n - r'IIII"'flll1 The Cord Weekly Page 24... Thursday, September 14, 1989

ha otl pr u be ye b8 ea ne

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FORMULAS FOR SUCCESS FABULOUS CASIO CALCULATORS AVAILABLE AT SELECTED UNIVERSITY BOOKSTORES AND RETAILERS. •m•a••· ••••••. ....1:1. ••••••••oo ••••• The Cord Weekly sports------Page 25 ...Thursday, September 14, 1989 These Buds aren't for you It's Trivia time again..... Toronto Maple Leaf hockey fans (one of which I am not) have had to suffer for a long time. Some say it is due to poor draft picks, ROB BROWN others may blame it on the coaches or general managers, but the problem is obviously owner HAROLD BALLARD. Our Pal Hal has created a dynasty out of losing in Toronto. The 1. Who was the last major leaguer to hit 50 round trippers in a season. Leafs have not won a Stanley Cup in 22 years and it looks like it may 2. What Boston Bruins winger will be the best man at WLU footballer Barry Hughes spring wedding be another 22 before they even come into contention. The feisty 85 3. How many Grand-Slam singles titles has Boris Becker? year old owner has shown no interest in taking the Leafs from their 4. What WLU Soccer Hawk is currently playing for the Toronto Blizzard of the CSL? basement dwelling to respectability. Since buying the team in the 5. How many NHL teams have won a Stanley Cup in the 1980's? early seventies Ballard has managed to become the George Steinbren­ 6. How many games did it take Eric Dickerson to break the 10,000 yard barrier'? ner of hockey. 7. How high, including the mesh fence which sits atop it, is Fenway Park's Green Monster'? 8. What NASCAR driver was critically injured during a race at Long Pond in 1988? Ballard has had some problems dealing with his support staff over 9. Who is the former Lew Alcindor? the last seventeen years. From the time he frred Punch Imlach just 10. What former Expo went by "Scoop"? days after Punch suffered a heart attack to his telling a reporter that he thought that GM Gord Stellick was 'too young' for the job and Stumper: Who was the leading money winner on the 1988 Professional Bowlers' Association Tour? that he was thinking of replacing him he has always tried to run the club himself. Ballard has also forbid his GM's from trading certain players his r.oaches felt were not worthy of such deals. MIOS·MU~vt:Riti1 'M~~5 (1: 11{ ~UJ ... l~.W=:> oqM. :JOOWlllS To be fair not all the blame can be placed on Ballard, some of it c .._~ J;;lA!fO IV '01 must be shouldered by the fans. Ballard, despite his team's horrible USA. .rnqqer 1npqv woo.m)I '6 record, is making money hand over fist as owner of both the Maple UOS!flV .(qqog '8 Leafs and Maple Leaf Gardens. This is because virtually every seat l~J 09 'L at the Garden's is sold out for every home game of the season, thus 16 '9 creating a large source of revenue. As well if a team does not win it v ·s is hard for players to ask for large salaries thus creating a lower SO'IIH UNKlN JOOOOH uopuky ·p source of expenditures. Any business major who doesn't like this ar­ I~AQ v '£ rangement ought to consider changing faculties. uotsuqor 8\}JD ·z; J\}lSOd ;;l8JO\}Q '1 Owner Harold Ballard isn't and never will be a hockey man. Un­ :SJ\}h\SUV til he leaves the team in the hands of a man who can do his job J,§ @lJ•; without worrying about whether he has the owners confidence the ~.-w,._ Leaf's will continHe along their miserable ways. ~~ CUI~ &21TAIN

...

Nearly half a million students can't be wrong. You don't need to be a you-know-who (who me?) to know that travelling by train is light years ahead of other forms of mass transportation. Nearly half a million students in Canada took the train last year to visit family and friends or take a well-deserved break away from it all. Of course the relative merits of train travel are easy to see. Where else but on the train can you get up and walk around, enjoy a stunning view, a complimentary meal on many routes, rest, catch up on your studies, travel with a group of friends, meet new people along the way and, in many cases, have :••.AT the superb convenience of downtown-to­ • downtown service too? :33~o OFF, And with students getting to travel at • 3 3 ro off the regular fare simply by showing their :I'LL BE student cards*, I'll be more than relatively • surprised if even more don't take the train :MORE TH.AN this year. • • Student discount not applicable on Fridavs and Sundays between : REL.ATI"VELY 12 noon and 6 ·00 p.m on mtercity trips anywhere between Quebec City and Windsor or anywhere between l lalifax and Fredericton • {trains 11 and 12) or between Moncton and Campbellton {train :suRPRISED 15 only) except when travelling to a destination outside these routes . • Student d1scount is not applicable at anytime on any route ~tween December 15th, 1989 and j anuary 3rd, 1990 or between Ju·ne 1st :IF YOU and September 30th, 1989 when sleepin~ car accommodation IS • purchased except on the AtlantiC, The Ocean and T he Chaleur. :DON'T T.AKE • :THE T~IN:' _,,~ ~ ~·-~~h. ~ • -ALBERT EINSTEIN ~ • Take the train. There's nothing quite like it! • .,.-_ ~ - -- --

sports

meter races by a small but detennined group of BLAIR HAINS athletes. The squad is counting on the services of Cord weekly several returning runners to add stability to limited team. However what they lack in size they make up in fortitude. The men's cross country team is on their mark Coach Ray Koenig will be back to provide en­ and is set to go this weekend at the Guelph Invita­ couragement to the little known Laurier varsity tional meet on Saturday. The corps of runners will team. They are still looking for runners to join the involved in several events throughout September team so if anyone is interested they are asked to and October before they host the Laurier Invita­ meet the team at Seagram's Stadium or contact tional on October 21. coach Koenig by calling the school and asking for The squad will be represented in these ten kilo- ext. 2437.

ANDY CECCHINI The versatile tailback was the only bright spot in a lacklustre Hawk offensive effort against McMaster. Cecchini rushed for 99 yards on 10 car­ ries and grabbed four Ian Mackenzie passes for 35 yards. Skaters figure on good year r~,,

MONIQUE MciLHARGEY Cord Weekly

The figure skaters are back on slack for the tough schedule. the ice this week in preparation Their flrst competition is for their upcoming season. After slated for November 25 at the an exciting 1988-89 campaign the University of Western Ontario. skaters are eager to start the new Anyone interested in joining the season. Unfortunately the squad team should leave your name at will be without the services of the office in the Athletic Com­ several experienced people this plex as soon as you can. year due to graduation. The Lady Hawks are hoping that the remaining skaters will pull up the

KITCHENER KITCHENER KITCHENER WATERLOO 465 Phillip S t 210 Lorraine Ave 607 King St. W. 525 Highland Rd W. (Parkdale II Plaza (at Heritage) (near Victoria) (Canadian Tire Mall) 741-1119 578-5050 741-5050 746-4220 ••••• • •• ••••• I TWO LARGE I I CHEESE PIZZAS I I I : EACH ADDITIONAL TOPPING $1.35 EXTRA CHEESE $2.80 : i 11~! i VALID ONLy WITH COUPON AT PARTICIPATING LITTlE CAESARS I I NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER OFFER I Ir•••••••••••••••••••••••••• EXPIRES SEPT 30189 I TWO MEDIUM I : CHEESE PIZZAS : I I I EACH ADDITIONAL TOPPING $1.00 EXTRA CHEESE $2.10 I ... I I 7:''+TAX :I I VALID ONLY WITH COUPON AT PARTICIPATING LITTlE CAESARS I NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER OFFER I EXPIRES SEPT 30!89 I~--······················-~ TWO SMALL I : CHEESE PIZZAS : 1 EACH ADDITIONAL TOPPING $0.75 EXTRA CHEESE $1.65 I

. ~· I I ·AEROBICS •lNDMDllALlZED • EUCALYPTUS I 599- I · ·LIFE CYCLES PROORAMSWfl1·t ROOM I +TAX I - !<'ULL NAUJ'F KlNESl()LOOJS'!S. • CER"f!FIED LUSClRCUFr '-OLYMPIC MASSAOE I VALID ONLY WITH COUPON AT PARTICIPATING UTILE CAESARS ~~ · rutLEXER­ WElGHTS 1'Hb.'R.AF!S1$ I NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER OFFER COSSCl.RcUtt .., J?()OL • SAUNA • WHlnLPOO~ EXPIRES SEPT 30/89 • ~--······················ The Cord Weekly Page 27 ... Thursday, September 14, 1989 Whatever the

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TORTURERS , VICTIMS SEEK REFUGE

·········· · ···················~ By Roxanna Olivera of the Varsity Osiris Villalobos is a torture victim. psychological torture. He has been recognized as a political school teacher in the town of San Pedfo The men abruptly broke down the After spending one and a half years refugee by the United Nations. He now Sula. As a community worker, he tried to door and barged into the bedroom where, in prison, Villalobos was finally brought -. lives in Canada where, in addition to his raise education and health awareness in the presence of his pregnant wife, he to trial and found innocent. permanent job, he spends much of his among peasants in rural areas of was forced to the floor. But the armed forces responded by time working for human rights organiza· Honduras. Medical and educational ser­ Meanwhile, the rest of the intruders leveling twenty-one additional charges. lions. vices are largely unavailable to those were overturning the house, searching He was accused of being an agitator, of In his native Honduras, forty-seven outside the middle and upper classes, but for documents, including university being a "guerrillero", of possessing sub­ per cent of the 4.5 million people are il- Villalobos, a civil servant in the Ministry identity papers, philosophy and political versive literature, and labelled a threat to state security. After a further six months theory texts and novels. in prison, he was freed and able to con· Among the "incriminat­ tact a United Nations human right orga· ing" works was Ramon nization. Amaya's Prison Verde, Most of Villalobos' friends and asso­ describing the injustices ciates are now dead. They include Fidel Martinez, Jose Luis Rivera, Rolando literate. Villalobos, among others, felt of PUblic HealJb, itrove to cban&f that. experienced by peasant farmers in Vinderi, Roberto Zavala and over a hun· the educational system should be free at Honduras. dred others Villalobos knew personally. a.m.• ~n all levels. As a student organizer in high The sixteen armed secret police and The government's official word wu school, and as an activist and president two vehicles escorted Villalobos to a that they had left to join the Cubans and of the Students' Federation while at uni­ ''"'QleteJntioln centre, where he was locked in Nicaraguans. But now, mal'ly dozens of versity, he organized and participated in !JIMllroom for nine days. their bodies have been discovered in demonstrations opposing the entrenched Honduras. military dictatorship. uuu.vU\.1;) would cry as he Villalobos depicts his torturers as He graduated from social sciences at was willing to say only "verdaderos diablos" -- the genuine the university and then worked as a high physical and devils.

Jose Valle Lopez is also a recognized presence of our superiors, and therefore political refugee. Today he lives in Can­ we couldn't appear weak. We just had to ada with his six children. But he was not do what we were told. If we failed to do always a family man. Lopez is a former our tasks we were subject to solitary member of a Honduran death squad. At the age of thirteen, he joined the army. "We were taught meth­ he earned forty dollars a month. Later, ods of surveillance, inter­ he was transferred to the narcotics and rogation techniques, effec­ police branch. tive use of beatings, how In 1980 he was promoted to a special to infiltrate leftist groups section of the armed forces. To enter this confinement from twenty days to two branch, Lopez had to sign a document and universities, camera management. characterization and analysis of persons, months." which he now calls his death sentence. how to seek their weak points, how to The interrogation process varied ac· He had become a member of the search a house, what books and docu­ cording to the importance of the victim. Honduran secret police. He belonged to ments to confiscate. "The Americans participated in the the 316th battalion also know as "es­ "The Americans used pictures to questioning of politically significant sub­ cuadron de Ia muerte" -- the death squad. present us with a bad • of Cuba. versives. But no beatings were allowed Lopez began his training at a school They told us people there had DQ ~ in the presence of the Americans." for surveillance and interrogation meth­ no work, and poor housing conditfons Lopez claims that the link betweea ods at a military base in North Carolina because the Communists. That the Com­ the US embassy, the CIA, and the In his classroom there were Sal­ munists were working to get ahead of us Honduran Army was through the "Jefe the "bucket" vadoreans, Guatemalans, and Contra and that therefore we should eliminate de communicaciones" named Billy Joya. rebels. The six-week course was taught them. We were told that we should from a victim In addition, he claims that Negropome string and then by ex-Vietnam fighters and CIA in­ regard the Communist, university stu­ (former US Ambassador to HondUJII structors. dent, union organizer and student organi­ com seeds to and currently Reagan's advisor for Cen­ A typical day in the school started at zations as our enemy. "In the tral American affairs) sent orders to Qeo. 4 a.m. with physical training. Theory comrades eral Alvarez Martinez, who in tum dis­ classes started at 1 p.m. and ran to 8 p.m. "Universities are regarded as institu­ patched orders to the squadron head­ TV programs and other entertainment tions with leftist tendencies. In quarters.

------Nancy Pocock is known as a friend She feels Canada's immigration ------·of) ... to say you are dissatisfied with the to hundreds of political refugees. She is a policies are too restrictive. Because regime would do it." director of a Quaker relief organization, refugees are not allowed to work as soon No everyone appreciates Nancy the Canadian Friend House, and a Peach as they come, they often fmd it difficult Pocock's community work. She hu medal recipient. She is known as "Mama to survive. received death threats over the phone. Nancy". Many have told her about experi­ And the RCMP has reminded her tbe Pocock helps political refugee ences of torture in their native country. teachers, u'IIVIIDlY Educated new bill C-84 permits her home to be claimants, mostly from Honduras and El In numerous cases, the victims need to people are . Students broken into without permission. Salvador, start a new life in Canada. At undergo psychiatric treatment are constantly thr(~fe~l .bJ the army. Pocock condemns the new immigra­ meetings held every Thursday night at "Very few of the ones 1 have spoken They are arrested, and made to tion laws, which means illegal refugees "Cada del Amigo", politi- can be fined up to $10,000, and may be cal refugees gather. "Although we live in a free country. many changes are to be made. subject to five years imprisonment "Most come here with "Although we live in a free counuy, their problems and we Our government forgets that peoples' lives are at issue. They forget that people are being killed for their beliefs and ideas, many changes are to be made. Our listen to them. We try to government forgets that peoples' lives .. help them get welfare -­ and that they must try to escape horror and death." are at issue," Pocock says. "They forget since they are not allowed that people are being killed for their to work unul their hearings -- and get to have been politically active, or had Legal Aid and find a place to live " disappear. They had acted subversively. beliefs and ideas, and that they must try Pocock says. ' done anything against the government," It is not active resistance (they are guilty to escape horror and death."