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[email protected] April 16, 2003 r in GCAthens Center Iraq What is the GC Community Saying;» GetsNewH e BC Opinion Poll Move 10 Truen McConnell Campus '.... Begins In Summer comm.ntarl~"l'. 2. & 11 See Ihe New Campus Inside: Pa18S2&3 GC SayS Goodbve 10 Sallie Duhling..... IrUa Flltball Comes to Georgia..... Calendar .... II PageZ 1~14r.rEt Parking Deck to Replace Student Center ScIentists PoInt Out DyIng as leading By Blake Duncan This will be the most exten Cause of Death News Editor sive rebuilding project GC has [email protected] Wortdwide undertaken since installing the Scientists at the Medical As most students w ill say, underground warehouse under Universtty of Ubya claim parking has become a se rious the soccer field. As for ruition that, after years of re problem at Gainesville College. and srudent activity fees, both search, dying has been Campus Security, along with the wi ll go up, the administration proven to cause death in Hall County Zoning ColTlfninee office claims. Tuition for in-state percent of the re 100 and the Board of Regents have students will rise from roughly ported cases. Signs of devised a solution to this over $700 to around S4,500, and stu dying Include: cold body bearing problem. dent activity fees will go from temperature, rigor mortis, "During the summer and fall 539 to $390. lack of responsiveness, semesters of 2003, the Uni ver "The parking deck is the most et<:. sity System wi ll be tearing down important thing for us al the the Srudent Center and the Mu moment. Once we get that built Franz ferdinand Found sic building in order to erect a we can open up the field on the Alive, Wor1d War I four-story parking deck over the west side of campus for devel a Mistake existing parking lot," said a Orange Julius and Sbaffo have contacted the opment. Orange Julius and Historians in the Balkans - Sbarro have already contacted Board of Regents spokesper school to open up shops once the parking have found Franz son. deck and other new additions are made. us about opening up shops Ferdinand, the famed Other building projects that there," said the same Board of Archduke of Austria, alive are expected to last for two years Regents spokesperson. expanded and t umed into one Campus Security is looking and running a small bed or more wi ll increase GC's stu Srudent GovemmenlAssocia and breakfast in southwest building with the Administration forward to these changes, stat tion and the Campus Activities dent capacity t 0 over 15,000. Offices. The Science Building ing that it will allow the depart Serbia. Eastern Europe Academic II will see additions Board wi ll be working hand-in apologized for WWI at a wi ll gain three new floors and a ment to expand and add another that will add a second and third hand with the Board of Regents helipad so that helicopters can 45 security personnel to the pay news conference in floor, along with a larger court to make sure t hat students do transport injured chemistry sru· roll, along with 30 new trucks Belgrade. yard area. Academic IJI will be nOI feel the rise in ruilion and dents to local hospitals. and a van or two. fees is not appreciated. Would You Believe She'sl03? Archaeologists and other Goose Sues Student for Hit and Run assorted scientists have By Blake Duncan PETA member could not be discovered the corpse of News Editor reached for comment, but did re singer/actress OIer under [email protected] lease a statement saying that his! roughly 100 years worth her group would be willing to 01 make-up buikl-up. Hol During an afternoon news forgive the student who maimed lywood mourned and re I conference on Feb. 28, the goose if that person agreed joiced the report. Gainesville College security of- to become a level five vegan and ficers announced that a member not eat anything that casts a Snideness Level ofGC's unofficial mascot group, shadow. Reaches Ail-Time High the Geese, was suing a srudent An unnamed a nd totally un The Compass Staff has at the school for pain and suf confirmed Oakwood police reported that their own fering inflicted by a hit "ind run source claimed that the srudent accident two weeks before. snideness level har who perpetrated the crime would reached a record high. The incident happert-ed on remain anonymous throughout Feb. 16, at roughly 2:15 p;rn., the course of the investigation, Martha BurkTo Hold when the srudent, driving a four after which they would become 'Nude' Protests wheeled unleaded gas-powered the object of mass amounts of Martha Burk held a press vehicle, struck (he goose al the ridicule. conference to announce campus's main entrance. Au The goose in question will be that the protests her thorities responded witliin two undergoing therapy and treat group would hold during hours of the event. mentat South Hall Veterinary the Masters tournament The investigation began al - Clin i~ i~r 'in] uri ~s ranging' fr~m 'NOUld be nude. The press most immediately after the inci two broken wings to a fracrured corps fled in terror, chaOS: dent 0 ccurred. A GC Sl udent bill. However, the goose is cur ensued. A box of Pop who is a member of PETA's mili The goose was unable to schedule a rently in an upper-body cast and Tarts was stolen from Au w tant wing phoned the Hall photograph session, so we bring you this confined to a miniarure wheel gusta grocery store dur County Department of Animal totally unrelated picture of Elmo. But isn1 he chair. The Veterinary Clinic says Affairs, who in tum contacted ing the riot. \ the goose wi ll be in rehabilita the Georgia State Department of just so cute and furry. Don1 you just want to tion for at least t he next three Animal Affairs, who in tum con· cuddle him? months, while the student fa ces tacted the Oakwood pol ice. The a fine of$400 and jail time. 16,2003 The New GC Athens Campus ..
The Campus Computer Labs Many current GC Athens students The new Athens campus will have complaints regarding provide students with many new parking. This will be much less of computers. Technology will be a problem at the new campus. up-to-date and more accessible to students.
Claude P. Smith -- Building The Claude P. Smith Building houses many classrooms and labs.
Biology Labs The Library The biology labs, like the one Unlike the current GC Athens pictured above in the Claude P. Center, next fall's GC Athens Smith building, are completely students will have a complete stocked with most things library at their convenience. necessary for all science lab classes.
DUSTONIA 0J.lJ Compm swr Student Center There are multiple student seating areas around the new campus. This will give Athens students more of a feel for college life. Pagc4 1~1#~fij April 16. 2003
Emotions Run-High at GC- ~VVar-. Forum By Healher-Hodges tion to better acquaint the au back these troops. " MaTlin More took advantage o~ft lie op- ~b Ji c saf~ 0 ffice r Richard Editor-in-Chief - . ~ .""l .. _ dience wilh I raq. She spoke Wilson, professor of history poTtuni ty to have t heir views Thompson. Lambert, >vho has hhod2171 @gc.peachnet.edu about li fe in Iraq, the Iraqi gov and English citizen spoke about heard than to ask questions of seen four wars in his lifetime, ernment, fam il y life, Ihe oil in support fo r the war in Britain, the panel. _ -said that most people today do Emotions ran high at the dustry, religions of the country saying that support was by no Student Emily Van Dyke ex- - not know wha r~t.c~ Thomp March 2 6 Oajnesvill ~ C~ lI ege • and the geography of Iraq. means unanimous. He also pressed her view that, as" -=a3.:r ;Qn- sajd, in an 1!mouonal Iraqi panel discussion, where itrc h~of the panelists then noted that U nited Nations ac ~ strong democratic country, it is speech, iiiil the problem was anti-war sentiments were gave their opening comments tion 12 years earlier would have America's moral obligation to in trying to negotiate with the drowned out by the many voices ex pressing their views 0 nt he prevented much of today 's liberate the people oflraq. Nick UN, echoing what Wilson had of war supporters. war. Kurdish GC student Shilan trouble. Finally, Douglas Tillford, another G C student, said in his opening comments. The Politically Incorrect Club Amedi spoke first, followed by You ng, a ssociate professor 0 f opposed Mosser's arguments Rogers concurred, saying, "The sponsored th e event that her brother, student Butan political sc ience a nd hi story, in a very maller-of-fact manner. mistake was trying 10 get the brought together all of the GC Amedi. Jason Mosser, a ss is and advisor of the Politicall y In Many supporters of the war UN to agree with us. We don'l community and even some out tanl professor of Engli sh, ex correct Club, supported the war. expressed c oncerns as 10 the need them now, and we didn'l siders 10 discuss the si tuation pressed his anti-war stance, He He said. "I do finnly believe that effects that protesters will have need them then." in Iraq. GC professors and stu said Ihal, while he supports the the risks 0 f us not liberating on the war and on public opin- Very little support came for dents joined the p anc! to d is troops, he does nOI support the Iraq are far greater," due to hu ion. Ya ung, however, defended the anti-war side. Andrew cuss th eir v iews on the war. reasons fo r Ihe wa r. Lewis manitarian ri sks, ri sks to Middle the righl to protest, stating that McA lister, a ssistant p Tofessar Bunderlai D unr.am , assistant Rogers, professor of geo logy East security and risks of ter protesters were a ctually very of English, did voice his con- professor of Span ish, served as and physical sciences and a war rorism. patriotic. cems about the war near the end moderator. veteran, described himself as a The aud ience was then given From the audience emerged of the discussion. Despite the Pamela Sezgin, professor of "middle-of-the-roader." But he an open floor to ask questions many war veterans, including imbalance, a respectful tone anthropology, gave an introduc- said, ·'Right now, we've got to and to st ate their own views. student George Lambert and GC was maintained.
Would you like What are your thoughts about the war in Iraq? to send a
letter or care " Initially, I was concerned because President Bush did not present enough evidence to justify going to war. package to the Since the war started, my attitude has changed because 1 see how happy the Iraqi people are since we deployed liberated them from such a horrible aggressor,," Caitlin Wills-Taker troops? Assistant Professor of Speech
Send Letters to: "This is the most successful military campaign ever in terms of having so few casualties. I have never been prouder of our troops. I love it that the campaign has been successful; I am just filled with pride. We have Honorable Donald liberated one of the most depressed peoples in history." Douglas Young Rumsfeld Associate Professor of Political Science and i 1000 Defense "I am totally in support of our troops and the actions we are taking. It is definitely in the best Interest of our Pentagon country to go over there and take care of things now and not give Saddam any more time to prepare. The Washington, D.C. U.S. troops are there doing their best. 20301-1000 Wendy DeRoche SGA Pr"';ide,'t 'Send Packages "The war is overdue. I believe in the next few months, we will find weapons of mass destruction and that to: will really justify the war. The French, Germans and Russians should not have very much say in the rebuild ing of Iraq; we (the US) spilled our blood." SgtMaj William Mid1ael Martin Johnson, Jr. G.I.S. VMA-214 "We could do it much quicker and more efficiently... without using as much mone"." UIC 410 17 FPO AP 96614- Comp ~ut~:e.~r ~:.~~~: 1017
"Packages will be sent to Marine Attack Squadron 214. "Saddam Hussein should be removed from power, but I really don't think we should have ignored our The following Items are Soldiers are being killed and families are being torn apart. Before we got into the war I think we prohibited: pornography, sno,ula have listened to the French who we have been allied with for hundreds of years." drugs, alcoholic beverages, firearms, ammunition and Nodine explosives. 3 .111 ...8 .. FIIlr Pial CI.~1I11S8 Roar Pial
n '_ " ... ~ -- --,,'...... ,..: AMENITIES • Private bedrooms with adjacent private bathrooms ~ I, • Individual bedroom locks and keys availb'e ...... ""'" ~t~- ' t:I· . I • ~-• . , .. " .r I • Washer and dryer in every apartment ./t~~~ .'r;'!;. "V : ;1. ,. • State-of-the-art computer center ! ! ' !' '-"I.l. ,1.,; ,.,." • Resort-style pool with sundeck and stereo system • Great location near campus • Gameroom including billiards room & foosball • Professional management • 24-hour emergency maintance ...... '7II' .. ce.' ...... • Individual/ease by the bedroom II•• wl•• I_IU._ I. • Brand new Whirlpool appliances including: ...... IN...... frost-free refrigerator with ice-maker. ' ..IfNUII ..... IJI_ .... dishwasher. disposal and built-in microwave _.... _- .... • Fitness center featuring cardio equipment • Free matching service if you need a roommate 'wU I CnIII ... _ .... • All utilities included except phone service ---IN"" en_~"'CnIII'"......
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.-' Page 6 i~i4Qn April 16,Z003 Bon Voyage, Sallie Duhling Where Are Your After 28 Years at GC, Humanities Division Chair is Retiring By Michele Hester Fees Going? Staff Writer THEN NOW ahes2131 @gc.peachnet.edu 1979 2003 Kassie Davis in a number of ways to hStafLWciter _ ...... --::-.....;. ..,.. .. - Ii\le-n up C.:I"'pU" lif" .. "d to I Aker 215 years or servl r.;c: ~I . - kdav2588@gc. peachnet.edu college more enjoyable. Gainesvi ll e Coll ege, Sallie are currently 30 clubs at GC Duhling has made plans to re· With the economy down and receive primary funding lire al the end of spring semes· prices high, many students at our student acti vity fees. ler. Gainesville College are counting of these include the Art Duhling started her career at every penny. Where financial Compass, Film and Literarure GC in 1975 as an instructor of aid and parents help some stu· Club, Student Government As· English. Two years later she be· dents with tuition, books and sociation and t he Visual Arts came assistant professor of En· additional fees, many students Magazine, just to name a few. glish, but she did not stop there. do nol share in this luxury. The amount of money given to In 1982 while working as associ· For a full.rime, in·state student a specific club is decided in ate professor o f E nglish, she to attend GC, the average cost is budget hearings. The spokes· also proved her expertise as di· $745. This cost includes the person for the club stands be· rec torofthe English Department $666 tuition, $30 technology fee fo re the budget committee and writing la b. In September 1987 19]9 Falhom Yearbook MI01ELE HESfERJCompw Starr and the $39 student ac ti vities fee. gives them a list of reasons Duhling received another pro· If you use aulO registration, they their club needs a certain Sallie Duhfing has made many friends in her motion, this time to professor of also tack on an additional $ 10. amount of money. The conunil English, and in 1992 she became 28 years at GC. She is sure to be missed. Most students realize what the tee then decides who gets what acting chairperson of the Divi· tuition pays for, the ability to at· and how much. The budget sion of Humanities. In 1994 she tend this college, and the tech· help us prepare for college level happy and have a good time." hearings for 2003 fall semester officially took over as chairper. nology fee, t he ability to use Engl ish." Duhling has been a part ofGC were held Feb. 28 and M""'U"I son and h as remained in that computers and other technologi· Barker says that even though for so long, and she will be 5 and 7. position since. cal aids, but some question the Duhling is an opponent of the greatl y missed. She has agreed Olher services funded by the nle Humanities Division is student activities fees. ideasofwarand Barker himselfa to stay at GC as an adjunct Student Activities Fees inc'.,'e I the largest and most diverse de· Jessica Duncan, a full·time stu· rerired Marine, they were always teacher and w ill teach a few but are not li mited to the use panment on campus. According dent, says this "I don' t know able to "sit and talk and share classes in the fall. "1amjus t glad the game room, free copies 10 Duhling's close f riend and what the student activities fees wi th each other" in ways that he I could be here for my students, the AI/aflla JO/ll"/la/ CO"",,,,· I colleague Carol Howard ( for· are for; if I did I would feel a lot never thought possible. "Dr. my faculty, my peers, and my Ijoll, free day trips, student merly Carol Pinson), holding to· .better about dishing out another Duh ling was always encourag· friends," Duhling stated, "but for discount mc,. i" , p'lSs", ,,,mpus I gether su ch a varied group 0 f 40 bucks." ing, a nd I fo und the discovery now, I am really glad that I will courtesy phones and Ihe individual s with such a wide Student activity fees are used of English to be so enriching," have enough time to just hang ors Day program. range of personalities has been said Barker. Because of "one of Sallie's bigsest accom· out and relax." Duhling 's ctf@ery altitude, Tom Tuggle, GC professor of '-:======~r pl ishments"at GC, Howard also Barker joined the staff of the lit· English, also recently an· adds thaI she feels Duhling's reo erary magazine and e vemua ll y nounced his plans to retire at the Other GC FacultyI Staff spect as an educator comes from became president oflhe English end of the semester. Tuggle and her tolerance 0 f other's ideas. Planning to Retire C lub. Today, thanks to Duh ling attended graduate "She listens and is slow to show Duhling's constant encourage· school together at UGA and have anger and di sapproval ," says This Summer ment and guidance. Barker is remained friends throughout the Howard . "She is so much fun 10 employed by the GC Continuing years. When asked about their be around. I will miss her, and I Education Department as p ro long.time fri endship. Tuggle Tom Tuggle will al ways remember how much gram coordinator for lnformation sa id, "We decided many years Tuggle started working at GC in 1981 as a fun we used to have at those 7 Technology. ago that we have to stay friends a.m. gossip sessions w ith Dr. professor of English. He has headed the Hon lanice Nylander, GC humani· because we know too much lohn Bailey." ors Program for 10 years and was coordinator ties secretary began wo rking at about each other." Tuggle, who Alfred Barker, a fomlCrGCstu· of the English department for nine years. GC in 1987. At first she said she has taught at GC since 1981 and denl, mel Duhling in an evening was very intimidated "working headed the Honors Program for Learning Support Englis h class with so many highly educated ten years, says he plans to "do Ann Forziati ill the mid·nineties. Barkerrecalls people." Then she met Duhling, some things that I haven't had his first encounter wi th Duhli ng, Ferziati began working at GC in 1990 as secre one of the first people to "put time to do, like reading and ··She entered the class room. tary to the music and art faculty. me at ease and let me know that maybe volunteering in the com· which was a couple of trailers I, too. had an important place in mu nity." When asked what he parked outside Academic II , and the division." Nylander says she will m iss the 01 os! a bout G C, Ray Hughes immediately made us feel com· was "licked orr' when she first Tuggle replied "the interaction Hughes became employed at GC as custodian fortable," Barker recalls. Barker found out Duhling was retiring with my colleagues and my stu· even r emembers that Duhling in the gymnasium in 1992 and will continue "because 1 am older than she is, dents." Tuggle plans to teach a was wearing "cotton pants, wool that job until he retires in August. and I will miss her very much. I few classes at GC's Athens Cen· socks, and sa nda ls," and he just want her to thrive and be ter in the fall . could tell that "her desire was to --_. -. -_ ...... -_ .. _-_.. _-_._- .. _-----._._.-. ... -- -_.- - - - Api" •• 2003 Page 7 April Declared National The Night is for Lovers Trend-Challenged Month The Advantages of Being a Night Owl
In light of all the current over the planet. That is why J pro I am a night-owl, and not the months dedicated to different pose to make April national kind that whoops a nd hollers and blasts their music to annoy groups i II American culture, I trend-challenged people's ing decibel levels. I'm not the find myself slightly l eft Qui. I month, where geeks, nerds, kind who gets arrested for drunk imagine having an entire month dweebs, dorks, techies, lame-o's, dedicated to you would make losers, bookworms, a nd, yes, and disorderly conduct o r you feel somewhat upbeat- and trekkies can unite a round the dances the night away till I'm a lately upbeat is a nYlhing bUI Thursday nights, where I can world and c laim the allention blubbering lush, either. I pretty And nothing cures a bad case of how I've felt. I'm five foot noth showease my vintage daisy duke thai is rightfully theirs. For years, much stay out of trouble. I have procrastination t han reaching ing, yet somehow thick. if you shorts. Where most people my trend-challenged people have to. It takes considera ble the night before something's will. I wear large. black horn age enjoy listening to music on been ridiculed by popular culture amounts of time to cultivate the due, because, for some reason. level of boredom required 10 seek rimmed glasses and my hair is the way to school, I enjoy listen and regularly downtrodden by creativity seems to awaken with out trouble, and I just don't starting to recede, yet I still wear ing to talk-radio (my day is just hip people everywhere. G eeks Ihe bats, possums a nd moths have it to spare. it somewhat shaggy and paned not complete without the c ut everywhere can proudly wave outside my window. That 0 1' cre on the side. The only job I could ting-edge consumer advice of their dungeon master's guide in Me, I simply enjoy being ative spark shines brighter in the awake much more at night than I get is a I the local mall 5 eUing Clark Howard). To top it off,l ac celebration of national trend dark, so to speak. do during the day. The night is women'$ accessories to pre-pu tually like to read. challenged month. I hope to make Which leads me 10 this ques quieter, with fewer distractions, bescent girls for a couple dollars Let's face it, I'mageek. Incase it acceptable to wear pocket pro tion: If, in certain places within and fewer people 10 get in my over minimum wage an hour. I you don't know what a geek is, tectors, suspenders and use na the Perimeter, I can get a Guinness way. Just the cool stillness of spend way too much time it is defined as any person whose sal spray year-round. So, next at3 a.m., (and I cangctjusl about the evening coupled wilh the searching for old vinyl records actions cause him to retreat into time you're about to call some anything I want scattered, smoth soft se renades oft he crickets and vintage clothing on the a subculture of the same ilk, and one a nerd, trip a geek, or god ered and covered almost a ny outside my window. Internet. Sometimes, ifI'm feel does not conform to the norm of forbid put down William Shatner, where in the southeast), why Forget that 10,000 Maniacs ing a bit frolicsome, and in the society. However, as horrible as remember April is national trend can' t I get an education? With song that goes "Because the mood to cut a rug. I make an ap this may sound, I am extremely challenged peoples month, so be increasing numbers 0 f illegal nightlBelongs to lovers ..... The pearance at a local venue, that privileged to fit into this elite sect nice, we're probably going to be aliens 15 to a house and seamen hosts a n 80s-theme dance on of unrecognized individuals all your bosses someday. night really belongs to the not aboard nuclear submarines sleep necessarily maladjusted misan ing in shifts and sharing the same thrope. Think I'm kidding? No bunk, why shouldn't 1 be able to traffic. No telemarketers. Go to share a desk with someone who You Think You Know Me? Wal-Mart after midnight when feels more alert during the day? the ratio of e mployees to cus And don'l give me that evening Whoop di doo! You think skip down your neighborhood tomers is three to one. You'll be school c rap. Evening school I'm happy, don't you? Or, I s treet, yelling "Look at me! dancing up and down the aisles schmeevening school. What I could be sad- my face wear Look at me! I am happy! Hee! all the way to your no-wait line want is hardcore Midnighl Math ing a mask of joy. These emo Hee!," as you throw brightly at the register a nd wondering ematics. Teach me a Romance tions, however churning colored confetti all around, what anybody needs wilh thai Language when I'm fee ling most within me, are my own. They creating your very own happy sunlight stuff anyway. romantic. are mine to release at any time, parade. When you are angry (JUSI don ' I slip up and forget Think of how many second no matter whose day I mess at someone, take a stuffed ani Hmmm. See? Life can be fun, the ralio a f cops versus non winders would sign up for third up or whose life I make hor mal (preferably a cute little but only if you let it be. Take cops al that hour a n your way shift school. Single moms in a rible, or utterly icky. teddy bear wilh glossy eyes your luster-lacking smile and home. That one doesn't quite daycare pinch wouldn't have Interesting, is it not? An ar and soft Sluffing) and go up brighten it to an insanely high work out in your favor-espe nearl y the difficulty finding ray of emotion can cause to that person, entertain them voltage. Take your frown, cially in a conununity devoid of someone to watch their sleep people to lift an eyebrow in with a s lunning display of never turn il upside down, and eilher a Krispy Kreme or a ing angels. Outdoor enlhusi amusement, or cuddle within a leddy-bear-a buse and pro sulk so hard that by the age of Denny's.) asts could c hoose to forego corner i n fear. I suggest that claim "This is what will hap Ihirty you will appear to be Being awake al night has its sleep occasionall y after a night more people wear their hearts pen 10 you if you lick me off twenly years older. Unleash advantages. As any night-owl of classes i n favor ofp laying on their sleeves. Sure, this may again. Alright?" Or, when you the drama! Let it grow a deep, cursed with a dial-up modem will during the day. We'd be increas lead 10 an uproar, causing are bored out of you mind, harsh burden within you and tell you, fewe r people awake ing our enrollment and reduc women to consume an unlaw find the most revolting and others. Giggle in ecslasy, cry means fasler service from your ing the percentage of class dis ful amount of Midol, and men hideous get-up, carry around in agony. Let it be known that internet provider. It's much cussions intenupted by the in- to acquire a lifetime of black a camera, and introduce your you are free. You are almighty, easier 10 get away with skilU1Y : cessan! ringing a f cell phones eyes. I say, the more emotion, self to random people asking alfeeling (and alneeding of ex dipping under the stars. Horror in one fell swoop. the merrier! "Excuse me, sir/ma' am. I have tensive therapy), but life is far movies are scarier when walched Who am I kidding? What I'm in the dark, curled up with some Ha! Just imagine, if you will, never seen anyone as odd and 100 short to be lived from the suggesting is an idea whose a roller-coaster ride called life: peculiar as you about these s idelines. body who knows just what makes lime has not yet come-which where everything is ten times parts. I am in total awe. May I Tum up the volume of your you queasiest. Conversations is just fine by me, not necessar as intense, frightening and have my picture taken with existence a nd get down with are free to progress unhurriedly, ily maladjusted mi santhrope freaky. When you are happy, you?" your emotional sell: exploring each delicious tangent. that I am. pageS April 16, 2003
Compass ~I n~ Advisor Chief Dan Heather Cabaniss Hodges
• CORRECTIONS r There were several mistakes in last month 's issue. The Compass would like to take this opportunity to correct these errors.
-There are only two "p"s in Mississippi. The Compass regrets the error. -The Hellmouth is not located in Academic II. The Compass regrets the error. -Playing "Counterstrike" will not result in impotence. It will result in brain damage. The Compass regrets the error. -Ground glass is not a suitable replacement for baking soda in recipes. Oops! -Tauooing four-leiter words on your face will not in fact keep you out of the Army. Uh-oh! -The Humanities Department does not hold human sacrifices every solsti ce. It does so every equinox. The Compass regrets the error. -The Science Department is not building a nuclear weapon. Forget you ever heard anything about it. These aren't the droids you're looking for. Move along. There is nothing to see here. -Suzarme Somers is not a criminal sociopath. She is a Television Personality. Really? -Light bulbs are not edible. Oops. -The Compass Staff are not gods. They are merely god-like. Or are they .. ,? -That belt does not go with those shoes. -Old "Popeye" cartoons do not contain hidden messages inciting anned revolution. -That funny thing in yo ur armpit probably is a tumor. Whoops. -NBC's "Friends" is not suitable viewing for minors, or anyone else for that matter. The Compass regrets the error. - Five out of four people do not understand statistics. The Compass regrets the error. - Janel Reno was not offered the role of Chewbacca in the next Star Wars movie; she was, however, offered the role of Professor Dumbledore in the fifth and sixth Harry Potter films. The Compass regrets the error. - Special Operations forces did break up a suspected terrorist cell in the Cyber Cafe. Way to go! -The correct temperature for baking puppies is 450 degrees F. not 350. The Compass regrets the error. Oops! -Yes, that does look infected. The Compass regrets the error. -Contrary to previous reports, April's boyfriend is ajerk after all. You we re right. The Compass regrets the error. -Anti-war celebrities should not be boiled alive. They are more tender if simmered gently over a low heat. The Compass regrets the error, -Inhabitants of the CybcrCafe should report to their local Soylent Green processing center on May 6. not May 8. The Compass regrets the error. -Yes, the problem is you. The Compass regrets the error. -Repealed playing of "The Breakup Song" by the Greg Kihn Band will not, in fact, alleviate post- breakup misery. It will actually make you want to kill yourself. The Compass regrets the error. -Kirk could kick Picard's ass. Get over it. Funnies -That thing under Geraldo's nose is apparently a mustache after all. The Compass regrets the Editor em><_ Drew -Gainesville College is nol moving to Wisconsin, as this would be completely pointless. The Sherwood Compass regrets the error -"Herbal Essence" shampoo does not offer the same pleasure as a sexual experience. Apparently this is a commercial ploy. The Compass regrets the error. -"CounterStrike" players were not otTered free on-campus housing in an act of pity by the administration. They were in fn ct threatened with physica l violence if they didn't stop playing. The Compass regrets the error.
, ,I' Copy ~ Writer Editor WriterStaff. .... ~ Matt George .. ' Leanne • Anzola I Lewis Lambert f: 16, 2003 9 BRIEFS A Driving Force in Arena Football Bench Press Contest By Heather Hodges quarters is played on a ficld that to be Held Editor-i n-Chief is 50 yards long. There are no Sign up now for the [email protected] sidelines, but the walls on each Gainesville COllege Bench side serve as boundaries. This, Press COntest. The CHEESESTEAKS: Original' Mushroom ' Cheesesteak Hoagie ' Pizzasteak' The Works SPEC IALTY SANDWICHES: Meatball Parmesan' Cheese Chicken· Chicken Tenders HOAGI ES : Italian' Chicken' Tuna ' Turkey· Veggie SALADS: Garden ' Veggie Delite' Tuna Salad · Turkey · Cheeseste ak • Grilled Chicken ... AND MORE: Onion Rings ' French Fnes • Potato Chips ' Whole Pickles ' Cheesesticks Page 11 tJri tt·'3~i i3'i(;1I:"tI4~i j Chicks. Booze, Tanker By Drew Sherwood Do life's questions have you thinking in circles? Staff Writer ashe 190 l @gc.peachnet.edu If so, Gainesville College presents the A furious explosion of sound overtakes me as I sit outside a smaJl room stacked with amps and 0 ther musical equipment that would take me decades to figure out. The music does not Philosophy Club seem to simply spring forth from these musicians; it seems that it The Tanker CD is rips from them'J ike a demon might be ripped from an exor available at cism victim. When the music lankermusic_com pauses for even a second, I re Open your mind to the possibilities, join us every alize I'm exhausted. The music has nOI driven away my energy, know more, f eel and d estroy Friday @ 12pm, Academic 2 room 147. but the lack of it drains me. everything. This is chaos at All the members of the band work. They all move and work Tanker se em satisfied, if not together as one force that lulls calm, when they play. I don', you to a still calm only to de mean calm in some quiet way, stroy with all the cunning of a Come and participate in enlightening but calm in a sense of peace ata jungle predator. In this single moment. But this moment "reporter's" opinion, these guys conversation, enjoy great movies, and hear is fleeting. are the best thing for my money. The music swings into a Also, I'm hoping they get fa guest speakers while having fun exploring the nether region of subconscious mous, because if nothing else, I that did not exist previous to this think The Suckstreet Boys and moment. The music has N'suck will go into hiding when changed, and now it throws you they see these guys. They into a non-stop whirlwind of should, too. I've seen the mas sound. II tears al your insides, ter plan. your entire body seems to Jared Forester plays the bass. Ken Williams plays the rhythm quive r and shake with alld guitar and sings lead vocals. against the music. It seems as if something so good can be noth Creed Carder plays the lead gui in g shy of overw he lming. tar; he is also the noise maker. LIVE UP TO Tanker is like uncut heroin when Josh Skelton beats the hell out it hits your syste m. You believe of those drums. YOURS. you will surely die, but you are Tanker has been together fo r two and a half years. Their al merely strapped in for the ride. An Associa te Degree is just the beginning . bum is called Th e Red hnmor As a writer, I am sad to admit How fa r you go is en tirely up to you. my a bilities are not defin ed tals. You can currently buy cop enough to trul y c onvey what ies of the CD from Williams here At DeVry University. you can get a atG C or on the ir website at this music is or why it i s so Bacl )l~ lor's Degree on your terms. Classes www.tankennusic.com. good, but some things are Williams said, hThe hope of are available online or days. nights and based on fee ling and energy. becoming a musician forever weekends at locations conVCIlICIlt :0 where Things you can't convey with makes me happy." you live or work. out electric th under, torrents of So that is my view of Tanker. poun di ng drumbeats, a kaleido All of you who know me have OUf goal al DeVry is to give you the scope of noises and a seething, al ready stampeded Ken to get education, skills, and con fiden ce you subtle anger ... CDs. All of tile rest of you mo need to reach your career POTential. There is somethi ng inside the chaos that relates to us the es ro ns arc probably staring at this sential truth. You win never page, furrowing your brow in a Decalu" 404-292-2645 understand what you don't vain attempt to understand what ~etta 770-664-952Q DeVry \,7 know jfyou don't try. TIle mu these words mean. We ll , I com mand yo u to either go buy The sic is e vcr changing; it con GwiMetl 678-380-9780 University Red lmlllor(als or punch your 8tJckheadIPIe A chill ingly haunting and mysterious new sound has found its way into main Well, another Oscar telecast-cum-self-cong ratulatory-snoozefest has come and stream music. Evancsu.vce's debUi album, entitled 'Fallen, has recently been fea gone, and not much in the way of surprises. Chicago took Best Pic (yawn), tured in the much-anticipated movie, Duretle'>'il. This nick's soundtrack includes Nicole Kidman gOI Best Actress (snore ), and Spirited AlI'ay won Best Animated two songs from Faile,,: "Oring Me 10 Life" and "My Inm)()rtal." Picture (zzz ... what? WHAT?) Did fjust write that? Did a Japanese animated film Vocalist Amy Lee and lead gll. ilarisl Ben Moody are the founding members of the just win a freakin' OSCAR? We ll, I' ll be dad-blamed. I' m pretty sure that some of band. alollg with gui tarist John LeCompt and drummer Rocky Gray. Having mel in the Acadamy (who have never been known for the ir smarts) voted for it just lale adolescence, Lee and Moody collaborated to create a sound deemed as a rarity because Sen to ChiMro no klll/likakushi sounded artsy, bUI what the hell! Hayao in thei r hometown o f Liule Rock. Arkansas. Lee describes their music in saying, Miyazaki rules! Finally, some legitimacy for the anime industry. The otaku tri "We're defin itely a rock band, but the twist umph! After all these years of trying to convince people that anime was good is thai the band's music is [a mix of] epic. stuff, finally I am vindicated in the eyes or. .. well, all right, pretty much nobody, dramatic land] dark rock," A majority of but you understand the fcc ling. (Aside nOle: I just realized that MS Word doesn't F(ll/{m d elivers an ambie nt and gothu.: automatica ll y put the red zig-zag under the word anime any more. It must be presence, expressing deeply intimate en;(} mainstream!) It was pretty obvious tilat Cameron Diaz hadn' t a clue what it was tions both delicately and eeril y. she was talking about as she introduced the films. but she tried gamely to pro On the firs t track, "Going Under," Lee nounce Miyazaki's name, and good fo r her. Maybe now Disney will be a little bellS out the frustrat ion o f giving all one more forthcoming in re leasing the rest of Miyazaki's and Studio G hibli's works, has and not rece,iving anyt hing in return. which they quietly bought up recently. Only the most cynical among us would As a result, she becomes victim to a love venture to suggest that they did so in order to keep the American releases of that is destructive to her soul. She reveals, these films small, in order to lessen competilion with their own garbag- er, I mean, " I'm dying agaiw I' m going under! drown their own pictures. Not that I would suggest that. I'm just saying, you know? ing in you/I'm fa ll ing fo rever! I've gOI to But enough about me and my slavish devotion to Hayao Miyazaki. Let's talk break th rough." about Michael Moore. Let us attempt to understand what would make a film A s hort intro s howcasing the fragi le, Vocalist Amy Lee maker (and by extension any celebrity) so cocksure that they are will ing to foi st ethereal quality that Lee's voice can take combines her vocals their opinions, however unpopular or misguided, upon a captive audience. Moore, on when paired wi th a p ia no, begins the for those of you who don't know, is a documentarian whose films, such as Roger wffh a hard-core band for IlOwpopular"BringMe to Life."This track 10 " & Me and The Big One, and whose TV series, "The Awful Truth" and "TV soon evolves into an anthem with pulsat a unique sound on Nation," have done much to expose goverrunent and corporate wrongdoing. He ing beats and Moody's heavy guitar Evanescence's "Fallen," is quite the left-winger, and he won the Oscar for Best Documentary this year for chords, bo th reappearing a nd growing his film Bowling/or Columbine, which explores how the American predilection with each additional track. for gun-based violence may have exacerbated the situation at Columbine High By far, the most stunningly intimate song o n Fallen is " My Immortal." Paired up Sc:hool. Well and good. Unfortunately (10 paraphrase DouglasAdams), Moore is once again with only a piano in the background, Lee's voice resonates with a heart not above a little political speechmaking in the same way that the sea is not above gripping tone. Her lyrics speak of love lost and Ihe hurt that still lives within her: the clouds, but no one was expecting the tirade he unleashed during his Oscar ..... this pain is j usl too reaUthere'sjusl too much that lime caMot erase ... and I've acceptance speech. I won' t weary you with the details, as I'm sure everybody held your hand through all of these years/but you still have all of me." has heard them by now, but I will use this as a jumping off poinl to express my Truly, two of the most goth ic and chilling songs on this album wquld have to be thoughts on mouthy celebrities. "Haunted" and '"Toumiquel." Lee's vocals allimes can be downright creepy and It's been pointed oul, but it bears repeating: Celebrities' opinions are no more raw. as clearly indicated in " Haunted." Lee actuall y arranged back-up vocals-a or less valid than anyone else's. Just because one is a celebrity (read: TV or chamber cho ir with the Intention of pleasantly frightening the listener. movie actor) has no bearing on his or her ability to fonn reasoned judgments When "Tourniquet" begins, it seems you have been ushered into a dark, hidden about government policy. I don't ask Donald Rumsfe ld or Colin Powell or place deep within the mind of Lee: "do you remember me'U lost for so long! will you Condoleeza Ri ce 10 make an award-winning movie; similarly, we should nol be be on the other side! o r will you forget meT' getting our information regarding foreign policy fonn Martin Sheen or Mike The album then appropriately sinks into a sweeping epic of beauty as bestowed Farrell or Barbra Streisand. That said, I will allow that Michael Moore, by dint of in " Imagina ry." lee escapes from reality and asks you to join her and travel into the his experience with government and corporate malfeasance, may well be more imaginary, singing, "in my field of paper flowersl and candy clouds of lullaby! I lie qualified than some others to commenl on the situation in Iraq. But his j udgment inside myselffor hoursl and walch my purple sky Oy over me." in doing so during an Oscar telecast at which every effort was being made deli b Unleashing more feelings of a wandering heart and mind, the touching " Hello" erately to keep politics out of the picture was extremely queslionable. The fact is, showcases Lee's rad iant lyrical and vocal abilities. She releases an emotion that Moore made a damned fool o fhimsclfon national television. I mean, even Susan most singers can't even reach: " ... soon I know "II wake frolll this dream! don't try Sarandon, orall people, managed to restrain herself to a quick peace s ign after her to fix me, I'lll llO t broken! hello. I'm the lie living fo r you ... don ' I cry." presentation. Moore, who often has good points to make, and who I quite admire, Encounter a realm of pure emotio n and breath-taking talent only Evanescence ifonly for his ballsiness, really wenl too far this time. He took an opportunity for can provide. graciousness and turned it into a forum for his political views, which, right or wrong, were totally out of place. April 16, 2003 '4 ,; a" 4~i i 4,; tJ l~h~14~i I Pagel~ Homes CALL NOW An Online RPG Without the Online Anyone who has played a massively multiplayer online role-playi ng game (MMORPG) knows how much fun lheycan be. Games like Everquest have thou sands of people who play everyday, some a little more than they should. Then there are smaller MMORPG's that arc free, like TIbia. Bandai looked at the popu larity of this genre and also took into account the popularity of the Playstation 2 and came up with a game that's an imitation of an MMORPG called .Hackl/ Infection. If the idea ofa fake MMORPG wasn't enough, they package the game with the fi rst vol PI<>y':lt ...U 011 2 . ~ ume of the .Hack o ri ginal video animation (OVA) ran/New k )y(jnufeJ' . Hackl/Limillality. The premise of the game is very unique. The year faKe fanjer/ is 2007 and you playas a kid who's trying to fi x the glitches in an online gaming wo rld appropriately called "The World." Deadly viruses are damaging TIle World and arc also harming players. Your friend, who was creatively named Bob, has slipped into a coma after being data-dra ined by a creatu re not of the gamc. The story takes yo u from place to place in the game trying to find clues as to what the strange creature was, about the ghostly girl it was chasing and to the mystery of your friend's coma. .Ha ck places Every aspect of the game has an up and a down to it. Visually (8), the game is beautiful. Yoshiyuki players in the Sadamoto (Neon Genesis EWlIIgefioll, Nadia) does year 2007, trying character designs for the game and details are done to save the a flair very we ll and colorfully to bool. On the other side online gaming of the blade, though, dungeons can be rather bland world from comforts are at and repetitive. Localization (9) is one of the game's deadly viruses. allure ot carrington better points. The voice-overs can be listened to in . the first lime you Japanese or Englis h with a good list of veteran animc Th e game voice actors on the roster. Music (5) though, is proves to be rather bland, and battle themes are only a slight varia- impressive. tion on the fie ld music. The battle system (7) is similar in ways to Phal1 f(IlY Star Olllille, and Cltrono Trigger. Characters jump ~F~a~S:te~st~~~~~~~~~~~P.A!tcc~e~S~S~i~n Gainesville into battle with no load time whatsoever. Sadly though, battles can get repetiti ve Luxury I , 2 & 3 Bedroom Floor Plans and the camera anglc will screw you over more than once. You have no control over the other characters in your party, but you can sel a genera l battle command Controlled Entry Access for them to attack, heal or assist. The type of action after that is strictly their 9ft Ceilings wi Crow n Molding doing (remember this is supposed to be a simulated MMORPG). Gourmet Kitchens The difficulty of the game is ni l if yo u' re a seasoned RPG'er. There is a slight Vaulted Ceilings wi Fireplaces' leaming curve for the battle system, but that is easi ly tackled in an hour of game Garden Tubs' Powder Room' play. Originality and plot (10) are where this game shines the most. The unique I ness of the game is more than enough to encourage someone to purchase it, and Monitored Alarms what linlc of the story is given is very interesting. I ~CJtrnglOn P;. ~ Ilrfo"t Sparkling Pool wi Fountian . Hack is scheduled to be a four-part series, the next parI of which, MlIligllal11 G.llnts".iIol. GA ~ Lighted Tennis Courts MI/fatioll, is set for a May release. The first game in the series didn't give State-of-the-art Fitness Center enough narrative to make it a stand·alone classic, but just enough to get you interested in purchasing the other three. Overall, the length of the game, around _,..,.. _11111 ..11. Exe cutive Business Center seventeen to twenty hours, makes it a good game for a lonely weekend. Hope lIIIUIa ...... _U411. Children's Playroom II1II. fully the second game can breathe some life into series. My friend suggested I "0._.'III... Jw_ '.... .• Covered Auto Care Center increase my ra ting system to ten. In doing so, I give this game a 7 out of 10 with ..,u. ..lIIIIIIIaI ... '177.1 •• '" Pets are Welcome specific ratings in parenlheses on each category above...... ' In S('Iect('(l 1iomt'5 " LANIER 2460 Spring Rd . Gainesville, Ga. 30504 - _ .. - ... 770-535- 1705 • - ,.- .~". " "00: ' - 800 Sq. Ft. .850 Sq. Ft .- ~- .- T 1000 Sq. Ft 1050 Sq. Ft. Po.inte Lanier provUfes a co.nvenient IOcatio.n 'With quick-access to. La~ Lanier's mast papufO.r recreation areas. It afro. afIows the ease afconve nience to majar traffic arteries ana 6usiness centers. :Many apartments offerpicturesque views of La~ Lanier. tf'ointe Lanier is a listi",iifle apar t.ent co m.tln it} ae signeti for qUGl;t) (illins _ iJ'lie e~"ptiOft4{ jelltll't' of tfle 4part.ent liortte i n c!u',: • IPri·vate a"Ii,;':(' tPatios . 'firepfaces w/naturaC oaltmantfes . Spacious Livine Painte Lanier offers a 5% Stutfent (])iscaunt Co-signers .ft.cceptea 1 'Ene Jf.pptiCtJtion 'Eee for ~OIfI",ates lVinctioru 1-91JJ '10 ,- --~ AprJt 1~. 29~~ , ... , P~e15 GC Out & About! Two semesters of Anatomy & Physiology In one summer for future healthcare professionals i summer course wi ll be held Mon.- p.m. to p.m. from May 12 to July 31 at our Gainesville campus. All lecture and laboratory content is included for Biology 209 and 210. Brenau Uni versity Evening and Weekend Coll ege (770) 534-6207 (800) 252-5119 Page 16 April 16,2003 :3corrio: The Scorpion Oct. 23 to Nov. 21 I'm really disap!X>inted in your lack Dionysus gives his blessing and en· of skepticism this month, Scorpio. I courages an early start in celebrating can't believe you thought there was your upcoming birthday! When your a war going on! We're realty at war day approaches you may spend it re· with alien life forms! Haha! Fooled laxing in the haven of Betty, Goddess you again! Sucker. of the Addicted. SP: There will be many empty fast SP: Your job as a nun ends, your ca· food containers surrounding your reer in a sorority/fraternity begins. Yes sofa this summer. Don't move. I said career. e,~ncer: :5~{fittMi1A5: The Crab The Afcher June 21 to July 21 Nov. 22 to Dec. 20 It's the end of a hard school year for If there is anything valuable I can you, but keep on your toes, and don't leave you 5agittarians with this year, let that pervert tick your feet again. it is this: In history and presently, SP: When people touch you in the everything has to do with honkers right way do not mace them. and wankers. Think about it. SP: You'll make fun of your friend for having dysentery and then fait itt .Leo: with Ebola. "OleUon e,~rricom : July 22 to Aug. 22 Pssst .. You want to know how to make The Goat someone reatly mad? Before running Dec. 21 to Jan. 19 away tell them their lack of emotional Don't be paranoid, Capricorn, be grounding is due to their lack of edu· elite! After finishing with all your cation. Professors love that one. Rock banana peels do not waste them, the boat and bail. Instead throw them onto smaller SP: Your addiction to love grows, people and telt them to do their job. you will produce enough offspring to SP: You will finalty realize you have A-rie.5: fill a small country. bad taste. Virqo: A-~Mi1A5 : The Vi..gin The Water Bearer The Ram Aug. 23 to Sept. 21 Jan. 20 to Feb. 17 March 20 to April 19 Everyone knows you Virgos still reek I'm sure all Arians' school years have been splendid! But what is one to There seems to be prayer for ev· of 80. There's a cliche that says, "It's erything EXCEPT for mullets. I de do now? Take your freight liner sex·drive and combine it with your better to burn out than to fade away!". cided to mimic Aquarian creativity unethical sell ing abilities to create an abundance of whorish fun! Rams You have nothing to worry about, that and make my own ode to mullets. tend to go full·force on things, so if that venture ends rapidly, you can stench doesn't even wash out, much Here it goes: Your multet, that art sell your organs. Now I know how Conan O'Brian feels. less fade away. uneven, Hallowed be thy mane! Thy SummerPrediction: SP: You will dress up li ke the funky front be short, thy back be long, on Someone is having nasty dreams of you in pudding. woman you are, make some awesome Earl as it is on Heather. art, and you wilt not feel dirty. SP: Your attempts at contortionism will delight those you are around, lit .LiPr~: erally. The Scales Sept. 22 to Oct. 22 f'i5Ce5: The Bull The Fish April 20 to May 19 The star-stone for your sign can be Feb. 18 to March 19 obtained by uncovering the undiscov· Speaking of whores, did you know that there is such a thing as a whore· ered tomb in Azerbaijan wherein lies Show your support behind R&B art master? That's what I call a hero's title! This is a perfect job for the a mummified sorcerer that grips the ist R Ketley by exclaiming, "The re seemingly prudish Taurean! Yeah, whore, yea h! (crack of whip and stone with his dead ancient hands. OR mix to Ignition is hot and fresh out scream). you could just by the overpriced knock ofjunior high... H What are the re· SP: Diet Dr. Pepper really does taste like your hair. off at Wal-Mart, Indy. quirements to be in his fan club, SP : You will survive. Don't forget to hmm? change your locks. SP: You will end up in a Mexican jail with a guy named Juan Moore. April 16,2003 Page 17 Staff Writers THE VOICE 'OF THE COMPASS Heather Daniels Micki Davjs Michele Hes ter Tobacco Policy May be Problematic Leanne Anzola The Compass staff is split on our opinion of the new tobacco policy. Some orus believe that the Tony Smith decision to ban tobacco on the Gainesville College campus is a smart one, beneficial to everyone. Jjllian Huffman Others of us see this policy change as an invasion ofa right. While we hold different opinions of the John Furst policy itself, we can all agree on one thing-enforcement of this policy will be difficult. Kassie Davis Since the new policy has been announced, the Student AfTairs ConuniUee has been asked to Priscilla Sugari discuss and make suggestions as to how a tobacco-free campus can become a reality. Carrie Wood On the surface, it all seems relatively simple. "No smoking" signs will be posted throughout the Frank Reddy campus and everyone will qui t smoking, right? Of course not. Has any policy ever been instituted ~[ri!liv:r Asliltanl without opposition or without at least one person choosing to disregard the policy? This is why Matthew Maynard strong enforcement of policies is a necessity. But exactl y how can a policy such as this be imposed? AdYiIO[ Many rumors have spread throughout the campus about how the policy will be enforced. Dan Cabaniss A notice recently posted on the notice board identified GC as a "community." It said that certain rules must be established in order to accomplish the goa ls of the community (in this case, havmg a tobacco-free campus). It said, " It is incumbent upon any member of the commun ity to play an Advertising appropriate role to enforce those rules." Therefore, as members of the "GC community," faculty, .nformation stafT and students will be expected to help with Ihe enforcement of this policy. The noti ce even For rates call (770) 718· compared enforcement of the policy to the "responsibilities that come along with the rights of 3820 Mon . ~F ri. 10 a.m. to citizenship," such as voting and serving on juries. 4 p,m. We are located Expecting students to turn in fellow students who light up on campus is absurd. We are not in behind the Cyber Cafe in elemenlary school; few of us gel a rush from being "lallie-tales." And let's hope that studenls will the Student Center. not be expected to tum in their professors for smoking a cigarette. That would be an awkward Questions regarding situation for both teacher and student. reservations or billing are Asking fa culty and stafTto enforce the policy may seem a little less illogical. I-I owever, this poses directed to Heather a real threat to relationships on the GC campus. One of the great things aboU1this college is the ~at hhod2171@ close relationship between students and professors. This is what distinguishes GC from a closely gc.peamnet.edu. patrolled high school or from a university, where it is uncommon for professors to know students' names. Students at GC ha ve the atypical opportunity to make close connections with those who teach them, to talk with them as they would their friends, and to form relationships that go beyond Writers the classroom, and in some cases, extend pasl the college years. Asking faculty and stafTto enforce this would seriously compromise the possibility of such a relationship. Wanted Leaving the responsibil ity to security is likewise risky. Their duty is to keep the people and The COmpass welcomes property on the GC campus safe from hann, and this is a huge job. Besides, a cigarette hardly poses articles and letters from the kind of threat that a potential car thief does, as we have seen in recent months. faculty, staff and students. Expecting the "GCcommunity" to impose this policy is problematic 011 many levels. We all already All submissions will be hold multiple responsibilities on this campus. Do we reall y need another? And can enforcing a printed on a timely and tobacco-free campus reall y be compared with the citizens' responsibility 10 go to the polls? Can space-available basis. students who are paying money to attend GC really be expected to "rat out" their peers? Certa inl y Submissions should be in no t, but a rational decision as to the implementation of this policy must be reached before the policy Word format and deliv~ can be successfully instituted. ered to the COmpass office on floppy disk or em'iled to hhod2171@' Let Your Opinions Be Your Own gc.peachnet.edu. MY Protests against the Iraqi conflict have been making headlines for weeks now. Every day they piece not meeting this become more strident and more evident across the world. But some of the protests in America seem criteria will not be to be somewhat uneven, and at least partially misguided. considered by the Edito- Funnies We at the Compass would like to make it clear that we are in no way against protesting anything. rial Board of the Compass Editor America was built on protest. As journalists, we have a deep understanding that freedom of speech to be valid and will not be Drew is one of the single most important fa cets of American culture. Americans can and shollld protest published. Sherwood anything they feel is unjust or unfair. In fact, like voting, protesting is a responsibility that far too few Americans take seriously. The fact that we can protest against our government is one of the things that separates us from the authoritarian dictatorship we are engaged against. But it seems that many Questions? people are protesting just because it's the party line, or because their friends are doing it or because Comments? some celebrity they admire says it's the right thing to do. If you would like to We should not protest because someone tells us to. We should look at the situation, carefully respond to or voice your examine every side of the story, realize that 011 political parties have agendas, and fonn our political opinion on any of the decisions based on that knowledge. Gel all the facts, and temper your reaction to the fac ts wi th the articles that appear in the knowledge that there is no black-and-white answer. All life is grayscale. Sometimes the gray is so Compass, please send an Copy dark as to look black, and sometimes it's so pale as to look white, but it's stili gray. Protest with your email to Heather Hodges Editor brain, and protest because you know it's the right thing to do. If, after careful consideration, yo u still at hhod2171@ Matt feel that the your cause is justifiable, then take to the streets. It is, after all, your civic duty to do so. gc.peachnet.edu or - I Lewis But don't just grab a sign and chant "No blood for oil" unti l you reall y understand the situation, the stop by the office. underlying agendas on both sides, and exactly what it is you 're protesting against. Pag- , ...... OPINIONS April.l6> 20:03• . Letter to the Editor Student Reacts to Thanks for Your Help -- I was deeply concerned when I learned that President Nesbitt arbitrarily decided to ban smoking on our campus. Despite the I must admit that my year as Editor-in-Chief of the Compass newspa- r--~ figures quoted by Dr. Nesbitt stating that an overwhelming ma· per has been more difficult than I could have ever predicted. But, as my jority of faculty/stafT support her decision, of the several em final semester at Gainesville College comes to a close, I realize that, in my ployees at Gainesville College I spoke with, not one has said position, I could have encountered much more difficulty, had I not re that they supported her decision. Of the students that I have ceived substantial assistance from the GC community. And for this spoken to, smokers and non-smokers alike, not one has sup support, you all deserve praise. ported the ban on smoking. Quite the opposite; in fact, among I must first thank the staff and editors of the Compass. Beyond the the people on campus that I spoke with, every one was con hard work that you put in, you all are what made working on the paper so cerned that college students who a re supposed to be treated much fun . Not a day went by that I could not go into the office to cheer like adults are thought of as children who need their decisions up. You guys can always make me laugh. I am amazed at how well we all made for them. got along and how unbelievably close we have become. Some of you have become some of my best Dr. Nesbitt claims that one of the main reasons fo r the smok friends. but I am proud to call each and every one o{you a friend. I leave GC with many fond memories, ing ban is health concerns. I am a smoker myself and at 30 years but I must say that some of my greatest happened with you guys. You all are amazingly talented and of age I believe that I can make my own decisions concerning unique. I wish all of you the best of luck in the future. my health. If Dr. Nesbitt is so concerned with our health, why To Dan Cabaniss, my newspaper advisor, I owe more thanks than I could ever express. For the last doesn' t she ban all the snack and soda machines on campus? two years, you have been my professor and my advisor, but also my friend. You have taught me so According to the American Obesity Association, "approximately much in my time at GC. Your teachings were not limited to journalism, though. You taught me about 127 million adults in the U.S. are overweight, 60 million obese, life and gave me knowledge that I will always take with me, be it in school, a career or any other and nine million severely obese." The AOA also states that experience. Thank you for always having your door open. I value your opinion, and I will continue to "obesity increases the risk of illness fro m about 30 serious medi· call on you for advice even aner I leave GC. I wish you and your family the best. cal conditions and obesity is associated with increases in deaths To my professors l owe much gratitude. The knowledge and experience that I have gained in each from all-causes." OfYOUT classes has helped me considerably with my daily responsibilities as editor of the Compass. I Whatever Dr. Nesbitt's reasons are for imposing the campus must also thank you all for understanding my obligation to the newspaper and for being so forgiving wide ban on smoking, I find it difficult to swallow that she is during deadlines, when my attenti on was less-than-devoted to classes. concerned for our health. If she we re really concerned about All of the faculty members at GC have been eX lTemely supportive of the staff and of myself. Many her students' health, maybe she could arrange a group health of you contributed opinions or stories to print in the Compass. We also received many ideas fo r insurance policy fo r GC students. That would be a real and art icles. Some of you even distributed our papers to your classes. You were willing to work with us productive incentive for healthy students. when we requested interviews. even on short notice. From some of you we received criticism, but even that is to be commcnded. Without critics. we would not be the award-winning paper we are today. BUI Suzanne l'olk above all. we have received constant encouragement from faculty who let us know that we were doing om jobs. Many other people at GC play an indirect role in putting together the Compass. Those of you in the Student Activities and the Humanities offices are always so helpful when we request your help. Thank you also to the security, food service. maintenance and custodial stafT. You all play a bigger role in pUlling our paper together than you often realize. The IT stafThas been extremely helpful this year. Thanks for the countless hours that you have spent in our office. GC slu(lcnls continually show their support by reading our paper. Thank you for you contributions u and comments. both posi tive lind negati ve. You are thc main reason we put out the paper, so getting feedback from you is always important. G C 's new tobacco policy allows students And finally. I'd likc to thank all of the people in my personal life who have been so supportive of me to play narcs. I am in fu JI support of protect this ·year. You oliell providcd a much-needed car upon which I eagerly vented my frustrations and you ing the health of those who do not smoke, always gave the encouragement I needed to do the best work I could. yet agree that something more should be It 's h:lrd to be lieve that I almost left GC after my first semester, fall 2001. It was only during my done to the 'smoke shacks' to accommodate second semester. afler I joined the Compass stafT, that I began 10 really enjoy my time here. I am so glad that I made the decision to stay for another year. As I head off to Athens, I will take with me the the smokers who are also paying to attend many wondcrful experiences from Gc. Thank you al l for helping me to make these memories. here. I think it is unfair to ban smoking alto gether when we could compromise with Sincerely, enclosed smoking facilities that would aI/ow non-smokers to be healthy and smokers to live with their own devices." Heather Hodges -Kassie Davis Editor-in-Chief AprilU. 21)\)3" '. .• ee' QI~ Ite' k" ..t.',.~tN ·'.· ·'~ Eliminate the Mad Dogs of Terrorism First of all: I am not pro-war. do not doubt thai oil plays a part have demonstrated quite clearly fend yourself against it; or bet Let me reiterate thai a liulc more in this whole thing, but then any that they are not willing to share ter, seek it out and destroy it . loudly: I AM NOT PRO· WAR. idiot could tell you that. Nothing this planet with us, and will per That is what is going on in Iraq. Nobody is pro-war, with the ex happens in the Middle East that fonn any act they think they can No doubt our government has ceptlon of people who do n 01 does not involve oil, either di· get away with in order to co w more sinister ulterior motives. It understand what war is about. recdy or indirectly. I cannot say us; These actions cannot- be al alway! d~ . That is beside the 'Fhal said, I must pt1inl out that I that I think that people shaull lowed to continue. The invasion point. Terrorists aod those who cannol necessarily call myself not be protesting our actions in This is the real reason we are at of Iraq is the first step (it is to be sponsor them. tacitly or openly, an/i-war either. There are times Iraq. Protest is a good thing. It is war. This is why we attacked hoped) in the removal of those cannot and will not be tolerated. when waT is a necessary evil. a part of our national culture and Iraq. Forget what you hear about who would randomly slaughter 1l1e analogy I onen use is this: I This is one of those times. heritage. Americans, almost by broken UN sanctions, genocide innocents in the name of religion. love animals, and I hate more than Now, before you all go freak definition, protest things they do by Saddam Hussein, weapons of There c an be no negotiation; almost anything to see animals ing oul in self-righteous left not like. mass destruction, and so on. We there can be no diplomacy (Tom suffering, but this love of ani wing ra ge, let me clarify. I don '{ HOWEVER: What I see going are t here to s end this message Daschle notwithstanding). They mals would not stop me for one care for George W. Bush. I didn '( on around me is not protesting. to radical Muslim terrorists: you will not be satisfied with ap second killing a mad dog which vote for him. I can't say I like It is ranting, plain and simple. No will no longer be tolerated. peasement. nU!y want liS dead. was threatening my fami ly. The some of his policies and I cer one seems to be able to come up Events have finally reached a ALL 0 f us: peace protesters, same goes for this situation. The tainly don't like his lack of with an alternative solution to the point (in fact they reached that warmongers, celebrity activists, mad dogs of Terrorism must be speechmaking ability. I have real problem, and none of the pro point on September II, 2001) at politicians and hoi polloi. ALL quashed. If Iraq is our first stop lillie doubt that this conflict is testers I have spoken to even which the Western world has OF US. DEAD. We are Western in cleansing our world ofthe filth happening in so me small part seem to be aware of the real prob woken up to what these terror ers, therefore we are evil. You that is unwilling (and frankly, due to a certain "cowboy"-like lem, which is this: radicallslamic ists are capable of. It has become cannot argue against that kind unfit) to share it with us, then so tendency ofhi s, if you wilt I also terrorists MUST BE STOPPED. an us--or-them situation. They of illogic. All you can do is de- be it. I don ' tlike it, but so be it. In Light of Trying Times, Turn to Prayer In light of trying times, and whethe r they are military search for an understanding of cause further chaos aod violence wars and rumors of wars, I want or civilians, cannot be replaced. the times. All of us here at in our streets. Eccles iastes to encourage you to check out Who doesn't want peace? Yet, Gainesville College, whether or chapter three says that there is a the upray.org webs ite. some don't, I suppose. not we agree on solutions, let's time for evcrything- a time of Upray. org accepts prayer re What common ground can be agree to stand together as c iti war and a time of peace. It's true. quests and offers encourage found for discourse? First, most zens of this nation .. ,and not let Like it or nol. So, let's pray for ment to military fami ly and agree t hat all ultimately want civil strife create more war zones. and support peace, Support our friends. Many of us are proud peace a nd are are a ngry at the who search for peace each wak· Rather than fighting amongst fellow Americans who have left of America's coura geous mili ugliness of war. Let's face it. AIl ing moment. Yes, pray ourselves, why nol recall these families and comfort of home to tary. We congratulate our Ser of u s have been challenged by and remember war protestors are wise words. "A Kingdom divided bring freedom from terrorism to vice men and women for their the accelerated war events in re praying folk, too. Pray and speak against itself cannot stand." a ll people. Yes, RETURN, sacrifices. cent weeks. (Who hasn't felt up. Yes, Americans have a right Does this sound PEACE, RETURN. Let us not There are many courageous churning and mixed emotions re to speak up, without fear of our familiar? Abraham Lincoln spoke take peace for granted any more. young Americans who choose cently?) tongues being c ut out. (Some these words when our nation Then, read The prayer of St. to serve in a non-military fash· What is the a nswer? Many leaders don' t offer that option, was healing fro m the fres h Francis ofA ssisi, (Did you know ion, as well. For instance, many people experienced disillusion· we have learned.) wounds of civil war. Yel., these that SI. Francis was once a pris of America's clergy, teachers ment during past governmental People around the world may words originate from a Higher oner of war?) Someone has said, and hospital workers , serve cover-ups, political scams, fail· not agree on the solution nor the authority, not our fonner beloved "All gave some," but "Some thus. Also, there are those who ings and misjUdgments, Such issues, however, America, we President. These words were gave all." Remember to pray for choose to serve outside the leaves many folks must stand together, not a part. spoken by Jesus Christ and are the families of those who have military for other reasons. unsure whom to trust People will We are The UNITED States of recorded in the Holy Bible. "given all" in mili tary service. Many men and women have fail. Leaders are people, after all. America, for goodness Yes, we all search fo r ways to PLEASE, PRAY- TODAY {A s objections in their conscience So, when possible, love sake. So, whether you are for voice our heart cries. Check out a daughter of World War" vet and choose not to k ill. Who, people, but only put your com military service or boldly upray.org as we pray for our eran, PFC Robert Duncan, I. but God and the individual, can plele trust in GOD. (Check that chant protests in the streets, pray nation's young adults- whether MaryDuncan Reddy congratu judge another's conscience for coin in your pocket. "In GOD and speak up with due respect they serve in the military or if they late America:r young men and him or her? Also, lest we are we trust" is more than a slogan, forone another's rights. Both serve to lift up their protest women who serve in the U.S. hasty in judgment, t here are folks.) As for the current situa soldie rs and innocents against the effects of war on in military. Many here at GC those who have physical, men tion in Iraq and other hot spots are caught in the middle of these nocent people in its midst. likely have served in the mili tal or emotional reasons on this globe, pray for all people troubled limes. I believe that Last of all, war, for whatever tary. Or you may have a loved for non-military life choices too. and then trust God. For whom God wants to heal the scars, reason, sh ould not be entered one or friend in tne This leads me to renect upon and how do we pray? Start in whether those of soldiers of free into lightly. Yet, while protesting U.S. Military. Obviously. w ilh anti·war voices and choices. your own life, praying dom or voices of protest. These the sacrifice of A me ri ca's so many young women and men Specifically, what about those for leaders, nations, our young past few months, many young young Soldiers and the innocent currently in many distant who protest all of war's atroci service men and women-who are adults have been forced to ma civilians, caught in the midst, let's lands, many are ties? The lives of our young sacrificing their very lives for ~ ture too quickly. These young not protest for the sake of pro- praying. Remember, chec1c out men, women and childre n, dom Pray for those war refugees adults, along with their elders. test. Lest, inadvertently, we u p ray . 0 r g . Page 20 April 16. 2003 Iraq: The Mathematics of Morality Of all the areas of study a per kill if he is allowed to possess orner 100,000 for Iraqi soldiers vacation at Club Med make it son can engage in, the most de weapons of mass destruction. (recent estimates put Iraqi troop worth his while to abandon his finitive, most irrefutable area is This is, obviously, a very hard casualties during the 1991 Gulf dictalorship? A new BMW M3, undoubtedly the field of math ligure to estimate. An atomic War at about 20,000). Of course, perhaps? A big-screen TV? A ematics. Regardless of where I bomb set off in downtown New their stance as supporters of the 1978 Fender Sh"atocaster Guitar am in the universe or what time York at 9 a.m. on a business day Hussein regime makes their lives with humbucking pickups and I exist in, I know that math will could instantly incinerate a few less ofa priority than the li ves of solid gold tuning machines? If a always yie ld the same result. I million people, not to mention during battle, we can expect a innocent Iraqi people or coalition rea listic a Iternative cannot be could be on the other side of a II those who would die of radiation larger number of casua lt ies. troops. Nevertheless, we'll throw suggested. war is a tragic neces known space, five billion years poisoning later. Of course, this We'll more than triple this num this figure into the mix. sity. in the future, and I will be able is a worst-case scenario-a ber and round up, saying that Z Even with this addition, the Numbers don' t lie. All that is to add 2 + 2 and get 4. I will al chemical 0 r biological attack, - 1,000. COWlt is still 59,000 bodies higher mentioned above is based on a ways, without exception, be able depending on where and when Thus, W + X is a very conser if we I eave Hussein's govern real-world analysis- not the to add one 10 any figure and get it is used, could easily result in vative estimate of unwarranted ment in place, and that's with es bloated, e motional crying ses a higher number. Pi will always lens of thousands of deaths. To deaths should nothing be done timates heavily slanted against sion that has been going on in be the same integer with an infi err on the side of caution, we'll to remove Saddam's regime. Y + the ongoing liberation. leftist circles during the past few nite number of decimal places. haveX-IO,OOO Z is a very liberal estimate of un The "peace" movement wants months. The facts in this case are With t hat in mind, let 's toy Y .. Number of innocent just deaths due to the ongoing the world 10 believe thai war is fully oblivious 10 politics, history. around with some baSICalgebra people who will likely die during wa r. The calculation looks like inherently evil. I wonder: How motivation or personal vendettas. in respect 10 the ongomg war In the ongoing liberation. The ca this: does this g roup view Saddam The facts don't watch CNN, and Iraq, shall we? sualty figures from the 1991 Gulf Estimated number of unjust Hussein? 1s he just an a nnoy are not horrified by pictures of W - Nu mberofinnocent Ira War place civilian deaths at deaths should Saddam be al ance; a lukewann, inconsequen Iraqi children who have been qis S addam Hussein a nd hi s around 2,300 (during a time when lowed to remain in power (W + tial aspecl of daily life in Iraq? killed or wounded during the sons will probably kill in the fu only 10 percent of all bombs and X}-2IO,OOO. Even if the anti-war crowd be bombing of Baghdad. The facts lure. This is an estimate based missiles were precision Estimated number of unjust lieves Saddam Hussein to be Ihe arc apathetic to Ihe popular vote on data from lhe last 24 years of guided- today, that number deaths due to the ongoing war very definition of malevolence, in the 2000 Presidential election, his regime's ex istence, and docs stands at roughly 90 percent). and resultant complications (Y the a bsence of a suggested al and don't care why George W. not include the number of Ku Let's make this an absurdly high + Z): -51,000. ternative to war is painfully ob Bush and Tony Blair are doing waiti citizens massacred in 1990 number - based on some of the So, based on figures most ad vious, and demonstrators have what they are doing. The facts and 1991 during Husscin 's brief most outrageous eSlimales vantageous to the anti-war fac conveniently ignored the need don' t lie, but the best thing that occup:Jlion oft heIr country. propagated by the radical leO. tion, we can expect roughly for a substitute. We should re can be said about the anti-war This number has been estimated We'll say Y - 50,000 - more Ihan 210,000 unmerited deaths to oc member that Saddam Hussein movement is that it li ves in a con as high as 500,000 (looking at 2 1 times that oflhe first Gulf War. cur in the future if''pcace'' is cho has barely noticed the sanctions stant state of willful ignorance. the nllmber of people who have Z = Number of coa lition sol sen over war. leveled on his country in Ihe past Edmond Burke said "All that mysteriously disappeared into diers who wil l die during the lib (I use the tenn "peace" here 12 years (which have, inciden is needed for the forces of evil to the descrt night , n ever t o be eration of Iraq. The number of loosely. The anti-war pack is tally, lead to even more death and triumph is for enough good men secn agai n), but as long as U.S. dealhs during the 1991 Gulf somehow under the impression suffering among the Iraqi to do nothing." The wo rld has Saddam re mains in power, War was 269 (killed in action and that t he Iraqi people have en people-we won 'I even gel into been doing nothing for far too there's no way to verify any due to non-combat incidents). Of joyed a peaceful existence dur those numbers). long. number. We'll stay on the con course, we are presently engaged ing t he past 24 years. Anyone To demonsh"ators around the So, when people ask me how 1 servative side and say that W ~ in a much larger campaign, and having even limited knowledge world, I pose a question: What justify waging war in Iraq, I sim 200.000. although there have been vast of Saddam 's dictatorship knows else is there 10 do? Ask Saddam ply ask, ·'How can you justify X - Number of non-Iraqi ci technological improvements de this to be incorrect.) nicely? Maybe we s hould try any other course of action?" vilians Hussein's regime could signed to save the li ves of troops What the heck. Let's add an- bribing him. Would a two-week 1amstill waiting for an ans ....'Cr . Regents Test is Insulting The Trap is Set Welcome to Gainesville Col of the test, then you have to take lege. home of standardized test a three-hour course that suppos ing, otherwise known as the Re edly helps prepare you for Ihe test gents Test. next semeste r. But d oes this It would figure that, aftcr course help with your GPA'! No. yea rs of I.T.B.S. testing, gradu It is a pass or fail class with count ation tests, SATs, midtenns and ti ons. I find Ihis test insulting less essays and homework. Who final exams, everybody wou ld because you have to take this needs that added to your already know how to read and write. I test before you accumulate 4 0 overloaded schedule? Not 1llC. guess the Uni versity System of hours or you aren't allowed to But once you have been Georgia assumes otherwise, be take any more English classes. sucked into the world oflrick ques cause you arc required to take Yet I don't get how you can ac tions and r edundant essays 0 f the Regents Tes!. cumulate 40 hours if you don't the Regents Test and those doors The t('st involves a one-hour alleady know how to read and have been closed, say goodbye essay and an hour of reading \\onte. to bathrooms a nd water foun passages and :lIlswering q ues- If you don·t pass both parts tains and say hello to Hell. By John Furst Are Humans Just Critical Animals? Every day that goes by, I won If you really think about i1 they exist, would we be happier? cism, wou ld we live happily ever der how people choose the paths 3rc just like gangs. Anyone who Maybe, but who can answer that after not wondering if anybody they lake. I live in a college 10wn is n 01 pari 0 f the gang is sh ul queslion unless 'we live that life is accepting us or not? I don't where people live life to please out. Who determines who is style? know. others, live to fil in, li ve to hale good a nd who is bad? I f you Think about it in this perspec· [ wish I did know everything, and, mostofatl, live 10 feel. I have think a bout i I, we do, society tive. Have yo u ever read Men are but I don't. Sometimes I'd like to been running into people who are does. But no one should be ig from Mars. Women are from Ve· chooses that lifestyle. think it, but inaJl actuality, I don' .. what they are, and people who nored. nils? It helps people understand Do you really think a lion needs I just ha ve ideas and opinions. I are nOI what they are, or for that A great conversation came up people. It gives men the ability books to understand another fee l like everyone has opinions matter, will never be. with a friend the other day, and to understand women and vice lion, or even a monkey? How and everyone s hould have the Look at society and how we we were relating humans and ani· versa. How strange is it that we ironic is this? We live to survive, right to speak them. I believe opin. judge people. For instance, so mals. She said, "we are all ani· are all humans, yet still we need just as animals do. Do you think ions are if11>Ortant. So my point in rorities and fraternities are looked mals, the only difference is we to understand each other to live? animals make it difficult to live'! I all thi s rambling is be open· at as good, truepeoplc. But if you have criticism." We all goon our Wel l, unless solitaryconfinement know humans do. minded, and understand that ev look into Ihe houses you'll see instincts, but we are judged on is your way of living ... but I re So humans a re animals who eryone has an opinion, maybe not for yourself they're nOI perfect. everything we do. (fthis did not ally don't be lieve anyone truly criticize, but ifthere was no criti- like yours, but it still matters. You'll Be the One They Test Someday, Frank Reddy Editorial Response by Lieutenant Colonel Terry Moorer to March 12, 2002 editorial, "War Prompts GC Student to Stay in School: by Frank Reddy, with opening explanation by Ray-Lynn Snowden, assistant prolessor ol speech at Gainesville College. In essence, FraJ Reddy said before they were 20. Other skir· in his March 12,2003 ankle that mishes go on in the small hours My dear and truefriend, Lieute/wllt Colonel Terry Moorer. JIIIS he was staying in college to when I should be asleep, but my been called to active llllty through his l'ervice wilh the NatiulI(ll avoid being drafted 0 ne day. list goes 0 n and continues to Guard. As of March 21, 2001. Terry was l'liII stationed at Ft. Ironically, I joined the Anny be· grow. I re-fight the battles to keep Benning. Georgia. where his IIl1il will ship out to a confitlential cause I couldn't afford a college others from dying because these location- my presllmp'ion iI' the Middle Easi- llt the arnval of education otherwise. I remained soldiers who were known to but (he nexltroop lransporl plane, I have been corre.fponding wilh a soldier for reasons I can't ful ly a few were my friends, myrespoo Terry and in a recent leller I also sent him Ihe March J2 issue of aniculate. I fmd Mr. Reddy's ar sibility; and any of these soldiers th e Compass. ticle offensive because Mr. could've found the cure for the Terry S lastleller to me as ofthis wriling il' pol'/marked March Reddy presumes to know sol common cold, but instead they 19. 2003. Jnl'ide his 1Illlllfwrittell leiter to me \\las (l typewritten diers (my generic term for mem are dead much too soon. I reo essay respontling to Frank Redtly s editorial in Ihe March 1 2 bers of all branches of military fight the battles so the Frank Compass, page 27. In a telephone call 0" March 23, 2003, Terry service). Scouts, a teanunate, a guy you Reddys 0 f this world can sa y, gave me his permission to submit his responsefor possible publi I believe American military his never really knew but you noticed without fearofreprisal, or rebuke caliotl in the Compass. tory adequately records the fact, around town or other people just by me or anyone else, that they Terry ).I.'(l$ a student in one of thefirsl communication classes I but if not, I, a soldier in the U.S. like you. American soldiers come do not want to be soldiers and ever taught at Huntingdon College in the early 1980s. He ex· Army, will go on record as say· from and renect our sociery-a they do not have to be soldiers. celled in the Argument and Debate clw.'s I taught. anti we began ing, "War is an undesirable state society which values life. Inevitably, and war is as inevi· a friendship which continues tot/ay. After gradlltlting with his which soldiers least desire." De I cannot speak for others; I can table as it is unfortunate, one day, Bachelors (/egree, Terry went on to earn" is Jllris Doctorate spile the repugnance of war, I not divine whether the present Frank Reddy, and those who feel (Law) degree at the University ofAlabama . Before being calletl and other soldiers will engage in conflict or any fulUrc: conflict is as he, will be the ones we draft upon roughly three weeks age. Terry served as an Assistant At· war for a myriad of reasons as just or unjust. I do know that and test someday on the battle· torney General in Montgomery. Alabama, diverse as the soldiers figh ti ng sometimes, in the still, wee hours field Frank Reddy will fight, even Terry and his wife have three children. The oMel'1 is a sopho the war. Please note, Mr. Reddy, when the Frank Reddys of this if the United States is wrong, be more at the Universiryof Alabama, Ihe mitldlechild is J3 and the that neither I nor any other sol wor:1d areaslecp, I amawa1ce fight· cause he wi ll realize that the en youngest is just five years old. dier ever gives or want to give ing anew b allies with General emy doesn't care whether Frank . Ray-Lynn Snowden his life for his country (after ail, Death a nd thinking 0 f how to Reddy wants to be on the hattie· as Patlon said, the object of war save Ron Foster, a boy from New fie ld or what Frank Reddy thinks. My advice to Frank Reddy is who was morally against war,A. is 10 let the enemy die for his York who was then a soldier and Ifitdid not dawn ofFrank Reddy to stay in school, learn as much Rooney, a reluctant soldier~ but country), but rather the life of a who should be 4 I now, except during high school Civics, the as possible and pray that war, ei one of our most well-published soldier is taken during war. Like· that he did what I told him not to skins ofco llege education which !her !he imminent conflict with Iraq soldiers, and others whose name wise, no soldier wants to kill en· do and ended up dead at age 18; he hides behind will reveal that or future conflict with another and SIOry will be known only to emy soldiers. Soldiers, perhaps or Carlton Zeigler, another soldier American soldiers do not pick country, does not come to the you, in the small hours of the more than civilians, realize thai who, in another time, was a fel wars for America. Civilians, doorstep via a draft notice. moming. enemy soldiers are people, who, low Boy Scout in my Troop and through elected representatives, Should war come, Frank Reddy, Responses to Moorer's edito like us, have wives, children and who died a soldier five days be· choose war or peace for the the U.s. Anny can use privates rial may be dropped ofT, in a the desire to grow old. The fore his wedding; or Lamar United States, and ri ghtfully so. with a college education who do sealed envelope addressed to American Army consists of sol Thomton and Bobby Davis, my War is too imponant to be left to not want to be in theAmlY. You'll him, to Snowden's office, room diers who were your classmates basketball teammates in high soldiers. AsoJdier'sjob is simply join a list which includes Sergeant 117 in Academic II, until the end in high school, a friend from school, who a Iso died soldiers to fight, try to win and sta y alive. York, one ofour bravest soldiers, of the semester. Page 22 April 16, 2003 Come On and Pia In• the Dirt Again Ahhh! Spring is in the air. The where Ihe birds sing Cal Stevens - =---, being confused with the p rin to face the st resses a nd t ra g sun is shining, the air is warm, songs, and my existence is based ciples of how to calculale rev edies thai I have encountered and I am honestly glad I haven' t purely on the conlentment that I enues for my parasitical boss in t he primaries 0 f my a dult pulled the trigger of the gun am far away from the cruelties of who is j usl using me to c heat hood again. pointed at my head yet because such a "Wild World." the unaware, all in order to win I just wish people wouldn' t I've convinced myselrthat Ijust Apparently, I can't help but to an endless competition to the take their adult lives so seri might make it through the year. dwell on mypast when I am based on your yearly income. It top of the money chain. School ously, because we are all swim Of course, I am being sarcastic. stressed (dwell on being a kid, seems like every job out there is systems today teach us that this ming in a big pool of ruthless I' ve just been so stressed out that is), but if I grow up any based on deceiving other people particular form of deceit is what deception. We a II need to be that J can't be rational, or much more, it means I'm going to have for their money. This means that should be our main purpose, kids e very once a nd awhile. less, serious about anything I to get ajob in a large office build we are all here learning the sci and that we should be passion So next time you are alone, or say or do. Call me crazy, I've ing in the city, and learn to ac ences of robbing each other. I ate about it. just feeling weighed down by accepted it. cept that I amjust another prod don't know about you, but I Remember being a kid, rolling the viciousness of the ex So here goes. I have always uct of society and there is noth love stealing from innocent around in the leaves in the fall, pected role you are supposed been told Ihal everyone has a ing I can do about it. NO! I seri people (obviously, I am not be playing barefoot in the rain, and toplay in sociely,jump in a purpose ... and this seems rea ously would kill myself first. ing serious). Do you want to hiding under your bed from the puddle of water with the intent sonable, but thinking about it The conclusion that I have spend your life counting num only problems you had (In my to splash the water as far as it right now makes me wanl to come to is that I do not belong bers and loathing i n meaning case, dad's belt and Freddy will go, or e at dessert before beat my head against the wall anywhere near t he corruption less green paper made from the Kreuger)? I guess my problem dinner. I call it a state of mind until I reach unconsciousness, and confusion of civili zation. I trees that you hate to se e de is that I still do these things. lessness, which others would so I can dream about running, need to be in a place where the stroyed? I would rather spend Though I enjoy the privileges, I refer to as foolishness. But if lost in an enchanted forest population doesn't judge you my life living and feeling than never want to grow up if I have that's what you think, so be il. Why Should You Quit Smoking? How much do you appreciate son with whom you are talking. yourself! Is there a huge contra I Letter to the Editor I In addition, the strong smell of diction in the things that you say cigarettes impregnates your en Smoking is the destruction of about yourself and the things tire being; your hair, and all your your h.ealth. By smoking, you are Ihal you do to lake the correct clothes too, in other words, you doing a great damage to your res /I care of your self'! Smoking has st ink so badly that individuals piratory system, so you are kill enormous awful consequences. who don't smoke will try to keep ing yourself gradually and pain Some of the most important con dislance from you. However, that Whydoyou fu lly, and the worst consequences sequences are the creati on of a doesn't mean that you are worth wi ll come in your old age. Here it terrible habit, the destruction of less, but it does mean that you is an example: one of my cowork your health and a significant ob have an unfavorable or a drive on a park ers started smoking at the age of stacle for socializing. displeasureable smell. I recom I I because her parents were smok Smoking is not a beneficial prac mend that after you smoke, put ing too. Then, her parents quit ti ce for anyone. especially for in your mouth a piece of gum, or way but you park smoking, but she kept smoking, young people. For example. one a hard candy such as peppermint, going quickly from five cigarenes of my fri ends who smokes once or menthol dro ps t hat would to one pack of cigarettes per day, had an emergency financial situ change your breath. If it is pos on a driveway?" and it is increasing. That was a ati on. and he needed to dec ide sible, brush your leeth. sad reality for me because she is between buying a lunch and buy In summary, smoking or nOI a really intelligent and beautiful ing a pac k of cigarettes. smoking is your personal choice, - Brett Poole girl, who wastes her life and tal Unintelligentl y, he chose buying but taking the appropriate care of ents, who is a slave for a frightful cigarettes. This case shows that yourself is your responsibility. vice. who can't find in this won when you arc addicted, you aren't Refl ect on the great number of derful existence some thing more capablc of se tting prio ri ties. consequences that y ou might va luable, and exciting to make her Therefore. you arc dependent on sufTer from smoking such as the feel h appy and sa tisfi ed other a bad vice. so you lose your free creation of a horrible vice, de than smoking. Also, smoking is dom. and your lifc doesn't mean struction of your heahh, restric Scholarships Available for the ma in c ause of many fa tal anything to you wit hout a ciga ti on of your social life and loss of heahh problems a nd diseases rette. Also. ma ny JX.--ople are smok your freedom. You should con Fall 2003 such us pulmo na ry emphysema, ers bcC,HI$l' it is a life style. or sider the cost by weighing what Will you be a GC student this fall? asthma, asphyxia, loss of vision. because everybody d ocs it. 0 r is most important to you. Deter Are you interested in weight d isorders. and n ervous because they think that " it is mine what has real value for you system disorders. among others. Writing, Editing, Photography, Drawing cool". and I eertainlybelic\'e that now plus for yoUT fu ture. You can Smoking is a signifi cant ob or Ad Sales for the Compass? those arc not fundamental do it for yoursel f as well as for stacle to social izi ng. 1tis ex e nough reasons fo r why you others. Quit smoking please. Contact Michele Hester at should smoke. In lact. you arc an tremely uncomfortable for a per [email protected] if you would unique and a dlSllI1c t person, so son talking to you when you just like to be a part of the 2003 Compass staff. fin:shed smoklllg. Your brealh you don't have to behavc like the Marcela l\ tejia smells ternble. and somelJmes [naJorilY of the society, l'SpeCl3l1y GC Student whcll lhey too are wrong. you cause h('adaches for the per- April May 7 15 Graduation GTA: "Proposals" Begins; Ed cabell Theatre; 7:30 p.m. 16 8 Honors Day New Smoking Policy Instituted GTA: "Proposals"; Ed Cabell Theatre; Free Night for Stu dents, Faculty and Staff 12 17 Maymester Classes Begin Chestatee Review Reception; Lanier AB; 12:30 p.m. 26 GTA: "Proposals"; Ed cabell Theatre; Free Night for Stu Memorial Day Holiday dents, F~culty and Staff 30 GC Graduating Student Artworks; Roy C. Moore Art Gallery; Maymester Classes End Runs Through June 25 r------, 18 Philosophy Club Movies; CE 108; 1 p.m. June 21 Bench Press Contest; Fitness Center; 12:10 p.m. 2 Deadline for Computer Club Webpage Contest Maymester Exams 22 Orientation and Registration for Summer Classes GTA: "Proposals"; Ed cabell Theatre; Free Night for Stu 3 dents, Faculty and Staff Summer Classes Begin Turbo Kick Class; GC Gym; 7 p.m. 14 23 Starlight Concert and Fireworks Show; GC Lower Pond; 6 p.m. Stress Breakers; Student Center; 10 a.m.-8 p.m. 30 GTA: "Proposals"; Ed cabell Theatre; Free Night for Stu First Session Finals dents, Faculty and Staff Earth Day Celebration; Outside Student Center; 11:30-1 p.m. Learn About Anime; Academic II, Room 170; noon July 24 Spring Concert: GC Chorale and Symphonic Band; 1 Blackshear Place Baptist Church Auditorium; 7:30 p.m. Second Session Classes Begin 25 4 Registration Deadline for TOEFL Test; 3 p.m. Fourth of July Holiday 27 28 GTA: "Proposals" Audio-Described Performance; Ed cabell Summer Classes End Theatre; 2:30 p.m.; Q & A at 1:30 p.m. 28 r-IA-U-9-u-s---'tI Classes End TOEFL Test; 6 p.m. 13-14 Fall Orientation and Registration Send calendar events for fall semester 18 to [email protected]. Fall Classes Begin -. - from The Compass Staff - DISCLAIMER t You have just read the April Fool's Issue of the Compass, traditionally the Issue in which we, the Compass Staff, have some fun and print a lot of silly stuff JUSt for the heck of It. We'd like to assure our reader(S) that the humorous artldes you have read are not. In any Wir'(, Intended to be serious or to disparage any person or Institution. No geese were harmed In the making of this Issue. In addition ...Oh, who the hell am I kidding? Nobody's reading this. Nobody ever reads dlsdalmers. I might as well write out the periodIC table In rhyme as write this discLaimer. In fact. T think I will: There's antimony, arsenic, aluminum, selenium/and hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, rhenium/and nid:el, neodymium, neptunium, germanium/and Iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium. Have I passed a hundred and fifty words vet? No? All right then: There's etKOpium, zirconium, lutetium, vanadium/And lanthanum and osmium and astatine and radium/And gold, protactinium and indium and gallium/And kxllne and thorium and thullLm and thallium. How about now? Yes? Good. Now I can go home. 8 16.2003 BRIEFS Earth Day Coming Up Student Profile: George Lambert On April 23, the annual Earth Day celebration will be held outside the stu· The Most Non-Traditional GC Student, In Every Sense of the Word dent center from 11 a.m. ta 1 p.m. The event will with an insurance company, yet He is the oldest member or Fit feature the jazz band, Writer is "too busy" to go into work. ness Zone, a fitness center in free food and environmen When Lamben was 17 he en Gainesville, as "'ell as the oldest tal displays. T-shirts and listed in the I 08th New York In student enrolled al GC. plants will also be sold. When most people think or rantry as a medical corpsman. Lamben does not spend all his modem-day college students There was a year left in WWII' time within the Gainesville City Old Email Addresses they think ormostly rresh-out when he entered. limits. He has traveled a great to be Removed or-high-school students mixed Lamben fill s his time doing deal overseas, including Bel All GC email addresses with a minority ormiddle-aged many things in the Gainesville gium, Mexico and he has visited now utilize ~he students. George Lambert is a area. He is Vice President or many areas orSouthArrica. He @gc.peachnet.edu form current student at Gainesville Friends or the Hall County li says he is "busier now than [he] of the address. Anyone College and an exception to brary System and a friend of the was 25 yean ago." He attributes still using the this common conception. Clark County Library System. some or his constant energy to @rrerwry.gc.peacme;.edu George Lambert is a 75-year He is a patron or Pro Musica or "Viagra and women." should inform their con old part-time student at GC. Brenau. He enjoys theatre, Lamben graduated from Syra "enjoys the presence tacts that, as of May 12, He was born in 1928 in Syra loves to dance and is interested cuse University in 1945 and took young people." 2003, this address will no cuse, New York and moved to in getting back into photogra classes in English and Retail George Lamben enjoys ev longer be active. Georgia in 1968 because or a phy. Store Management. Lambert ery aspect or attending GC company transrer(and his wire Lamben also dabbles in the enrolled in GC in the spring and and helping out the Changes Made not wanting t9 spend another stock market, holding shares in is taking a Spanish class. He Gainesville community. to Testing Center winter in New York). He cur companies such as AOL, AT&T says the reason behind his de When asked what keeps him In an attempt to make the rently lives in Gainesv ille, Wireless, and Chevron-Texaco. cision to go back 10 college is is such good spirits and ruels ACTT center testing radli Georgia. He isa member ofthe Wall Street because he "wanted to take his desire to live lire to its full ties more quiet and se Lamben married in 1948 and Club and a member orEI Fuenta, Spanish" because he thinks it is est he says, " don 't think cure, cameras have been has two children, a daughter a local Hispanic organization. very imponant. He also said he about Ihe hard times." moved so that every two and a son. Heisstillemployed carrels can be monitored. In addition, the cameras were wired for sound, and all cell phones must now be left on the shelves pro vided in the testing cen Students Enjoy Spring Fling Despite Rain ter. By Michele Hester throw and ring toss games, and Staff Writer prizes were awarded to the game Register for ahes2131 @gc.peachnct.edu winners. All prizes had a Ha Regents Test waiian theme and many stu On-line registration for the Last Monday. April7 between dents who attended left with leis summer semester Re 10 a.m. and 2 p.m. Gainesville around Iheir necks, tropical gents' Test is now active. College 's Ca mpus Activity drinking glasses in their hands Remember that the test Board hosted the annual Spring and beach bags on their shoul must be taken before 45 Fling. ders. hou rs are acquired . "Despite inclement weather CAB originally scheduled a and several other cancellations, caricalUre artist who cancelled Women Leaders thc Spring Fling was a great suc prior to Ihe fling. The anisls' Honored at Luncheon cess," says Campus Activity renderings would have rree to On March 14, the offICe for Board member and GC student all who attended and would Minority Affairs held the Aaron Bennett. Originally, the have been a nice addition to the second annual Women event was to b e held outside, event. Leaders of Halt County but the weather rorced the event The band Well Water, w ho Luncheon. Many GC stu to be mo ved inside the very won the Battle orthe Bands ear dents were invited to at cramped student ac ti vities build lier this semester. we re sched tend, along with area high mg. uled to play during the fling but school students, to cel While many st udents dined cancelled about an hour before ebrate the memory of on rree hamburgers and chips, the event started ...It was very Frances Meadows. The cotton candy and popcom. oth rruslrating at first," Bennett said, Alpha Kappa Alpha society ers took ad va nl age o r the Student Will Gilchrist competes in the bungee run. "but students and s tafT alike of Gwinnett County BUllgee Run. The competition bungee cord to their bodies, ran Michell e Lindsey a nd Ashley went to their cars and brought awarded a scholarship to challenged runners 10 race to the and were jerked back to the Sian. Green spenl many hours in their O\\ITl CDs and everyone GC in her honor. finish. Playcrs altached a CA B representatives contrucling the ball oon dart ended up havlllg a great time." , .... . -O . &_ L &"- • • ~ • •• ". A Deeper Meaning to Dr. Seuss Finally. the Respect They Deserve For our final issue of the Compass this semester I decided 10 take a step back For my final restaurant review for the semester, I must pay homage to all the from recent novels and review a classic. There are so many classics in this day finer eateries in Gainesville. Many people take advantage of these places, and I and age I am sure you are asking yourselves, "How could she pick from all the fee l it is due time to show thent our appreciation. wonderful selections oul there?" There are many classics like The COU III of Let's stan with the basic two-McDonald's and Burger King. Never before MOllie Cristo, rhe A(/ventures a/Tom Sll~er, Pride anti Prej udice and Dracula. has a hamburger been as lasty as the panies served at BK. The wa y they char The list goes on and on, but I have decided to review one of my all-time grill thai burger like they invented the grill is quite extraordinary. While the more fa voriles, Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss. fancy burgers are a little more costly, ranging from 52-3, a few value burgers can be found for a mere $.99. These Before reviewing this book, I had ~i~~~oo~---i~r~ TlOI read it in yea rs and it brought back • .. ,,~ "" burgers are also just as tasty, and with a deal like that, many childhood memories. It was one !., "li 1. who call resist? While McDonald's serves burgers as of my fa voriles as a child, but as an well, it is their fries thaI put them on the map (along with adult I have to question Dr. Seuss and the beauty of their golden arches). Everyone has tried what Green Eggs (lnd Ham is really them at some point in their life and everyone knows just about. I read Creen Eggs allti Ham I ~.tl'iilj,l how delicious they are. I believe the fries make a trip 10 several times when I chose it for my McDonald's worth it. Also notable at McDonald's is their book re view, and let's face it, it doesn't vast array of desserts. At what other fine restaurant can take that long, but I came to a startling you find a parfait for under $2,! discovery while reading it. Dr. Seuss Okay, okay, I almost forgot Wendy's. If burgers and uses green eggs and ham as a meta fries aren' t on your palette for the day, Wendy's offers phor for a much deeper meaning. much more. Baked potatoes, salads and chili are always At the start of the book, we see the an option. The potatoes are quite sensational, giving main character, who is never given a customers a choice of toppings. They also have burgers, name, being annoyed by Sam-I-Am. but let's fa ct it- Wendy's is a treat fo r those soup and Then, Sam asks him if he likes green salad tans. eggs and h am. The main charactcr Le!'s move on to the ethnic category. If Mexican is says h e does not. Throughout the what you are searching for, Taco Bell has itall. From their TACO book Sa m proceeds 10 a sk the main tasty tacos to their cheesy quesadillas, Taco Bell is bar BELL character ifhe likes green eggs and Is 'Green Eggs and Ham' gain city. Ifone taco isn't enough, nachos are quite the ham in v arious different si lualions, really meant to be an side item. Not only can you eat fine Mexican food with such as with a mouse, in a house, in out the COSt, but they are open late as well, so yo u can analogy for sex? Maybe the rain, on a train, in a car, or up a tree, enjoy the Bell just about any time you like. The onl y and on and on and on. Finally,just to Dr. Seuss wasn Yso dessert they carry is the Choco Taco, but hey, with a shut Sam up the main character tries innocent. menu as plentiful as theirs, who needs dessert? the green eggs and ham and he likes I haven't forgonen about those health nuts. While it's them. And he will eat them wilh any- nice to splurge sometimes, we all have our health to worry th ing and anywhere. about. This brings me to Subway. Deli sandwiches with your choice of ingredi I believe that Dr. Seuss had an underlyi ng meaning in this book. Green eggs ents, what a concept. They even build your sandwich for you! Thcy walk down and ham is a metaphor for sex. The main character is obviously scared and the line with you as you decide-it's like an ice cream shop reall y, each delicious intimidated by sex of any kind. Sam is trying to introduce him to his world of all topping is added onl y by your request. Not only are Subway's sandwiches sorlS of different acts of sexual exercises. The main character does not like Sam appetiz.ing, but they are low in fat as well. Just ask Jared-he's a new man either and it's most likely because Sam is so loose with his sexual activities. We because of Subway, find sex in thc foml of voyeurism: on a train, in the rain and on a boat; bestiality: At the end of the meal, wealllike to splurge. This brings me to dessert and the with a mouse, with a fox and with a goat; and there're also normal sexual situa sweets offered at Dairy Queen. BliZZilds are al\.1{a'y's wJ.us t e ,~" ,,,,,,, • .• /IW'-~-- tions: in a house and in the dark. Once the main character tries sex, ~rli c l cd cooldc--duugtl nelng excepfionallyS'CrUmptious. (shouldn' t have to say !o if"tlnd he will ha <:i'ert with anythi ng and anywhere, even possibly with Sam-I much about this place-any way you want yo ur ice cream, they can deliver. Amhimself. With summertime right around the comer, it's hard to resist the cool treats that So think in lemlS of sex the next ti me you read Cree" Eggs lIl/d Ham and you Dairy Queen has to offer. will be surprised and ma ybe slightl y appa lled at what you discover, I know I wi ll As I wrap up my compilation of the higher quality foods in Gainesville, I realize never read it the same way aga in, and who knows how many of his other books just how lucky we are to have such a fine selecti on of cuisine. Although these have such underlying meanings, I think a good question you should ask your places will not cater, they are always there with a smile, and always willing to selfwhile reading this book is, did Dr. Seuss write from personal experience? make just as many burgers as yo u wish. I hope that all of you will treat your selves to some of the delectable meals that fasl-paced service food has 10 offer. AprIl 16.2003 G!I):F' P-.reS BRIEFS Politically Inconect Grab Your Halter Tops and Daisy Dukes, Club to Host PIC Day The Politically Incorrect dub will host National Po Strip Club Coming to Gainesville College litically Incorrect Day. A April Landry meeting will be held to dis Oubs Editor cuss all things political, in [email protected] an incorrect and political fashion. Are you an aUractive person? Do you take pride in your body? Math Club Plans Trip Do you like to dance for money? The Math dub Is taking a Well, t hen, Missy! The 5 trip trip to visit Albert Oub is right for you!! Einstein's grave in Gainesville College is proud to Princeton, New Jersey. announce lhe arrival of its very The Club will calculate tile own Strip Club. Meetings are exact length in feet that Mondays at noon at the flag pole Einstein's body lay, and in the from parking lot, and Sal then count the bones! urday nights at t he Clermont What fun! LoWlge in Atlanta (only the fin est will do!). D Tess is casual Cyber Geek Club Holds skank: leather, lace, lube; it UnoIIidaI_ng doesn't matter! It won't stay on The UnofflcIal Cyber Geek long! Club will be holding Its Just think of the money you daily meeting In tile Cyber can raise shaking your "groove cafe to discuss important thang" in the face of a very ap The new GC strip club will allow GC's students to show a different side-their topics such as COunter preciative contributor. Pay can back side! Strike, Warcraft and hy range from $300 to $600 a night! giene. Just k1ddlng ... that The money made in the first few last one Is a joke. meetings goes towards the lows me to have complete cre hurt, but isn'l necessary. your tassels (we're not talkin' building ofan arena for the Strip ative freedom over my sweet ass. President of t he Strip C lub, graduation here ... )! Come join SkIn Divers to Dive Club on campus, complete with In_ The Strip Club does just that, and ''Candi'', explains "We'll take just the sweaty fun and grind on stainless steel poles and LOTS I think that w ill make people 'bout anybody. You don't gotta down to the Strip Club today!! The GC Skin Divers will be of Formula 409. After that, it's sponsoring a trip to come," says Puffer, "and I want be teeny tiny or nothin, I mean, For more information, contact as good as cash in your garter, to join the Club in support of that shoot. Fat bottom girls rule the Candi Kane at Alaska in fall semester. sweetheart! freedom." world, aight!" ca ndika ne _ [email protected] The \lip will include activi Joining member Peter Puffer ties such as an underwa So what exactly do you have So fellas, grab your cowboy by email, or by phone at 1·900- says, "I've always wanted to be to lose? A few pounds couldn 't chaps. And ladies, don't fo rget STICKlE. ter adventure through tile a part of an organization that ai- Alaskan PadflC In the mid winter!! Sign me up! • Their Secret IS COmpass Luks Finally Out 4NuRiten The compass Iz looking Young Detectives of Gainesville Col/ege are Working for You four nu riters four the / By Leanne Anzola characteristics about them received and now fears for their small . In fact, their club motto is payper. If you are a tal Staff Writer selves that blow their cover. If as follows: ''Together we will be ented riter and you are safety. The cup of coffee, of [email protected] you have ever had that one per one, the one to protect our fe l fntresteded, please emlal course, has their nexl meeting son in every class that always location written strategicall y ei low s tudents from 0 thers and Michele Hester at An exciting new club has been shows up five to 10 minutes late ther around the rim 0 r on the even themselves sometimes." ifts2l.31@}:.,m.w.iJ. discovered here on the to class, walking inas if they had bottom. How touching. Gainesville College campus. caused no disturbance whatso Admittedly, the YO ofGC has No one knows wbo has begun • It' ."" research, I _ -_. ever. The professor doesn't not been so successful just yet this fleet of Young Detectives, t'hc vcry even scem 10 mind and thai .1"",-_ in investi.e:atin2 vari forms f our very own investigators. One cretive and highly mysterious, dent is usually on a cell phone crime around campus. Lately, if thing is certlln,-whocvt:rbcI5CU1 YOWlg Detectives of Gainesville or holding a cup of coffee. That, anyone has lost a personal item the YO of GC deserves a wann College, or the YO ofGC. my dear Watson., is a member of and this item decides to magi hug or at least a sincere smile Such members of this tightly the YO of GC! They are obvi cally r eappear when you turn from all of us. If the president of operated organization are in high ously on their cell discussing a back around, the YO ofGC are to the YDs would happen to be abundance all over campus. I top secret agenda for the day, thank. They do what they can to reading this, I would ask of him was not able to derive an exact probably the theft of a purse or make fellow GC Sludents feel safe or her to please come forward number of members or even wallet, or perhaps the frighten and try to at any cost 10 put an and let GC bask in your blinding names of these so-called YDs. ing glares a fellow student has end to campus crime, large 0 r glory. Thank you. They do, however, have certain "-l. .. I " , .JU" I BRIEFS New Intramurals Offered this Month Four new intramurals SlXlrts will now be offered. They include naked mud wrestling , underwater soccer, cosmic badminton and flashlight tag. If you are interested then see the P.E. department for more Counterstrike Chosen as Official Sport; details. Sign up now f or GC Easter Egg Hunt Garners Everywhere Rejoice in Decision Sign up now for the 2003 Gainesville College Easter Gainesville College has finally SS: Yeah, after the rash broke Egg Hunt. The hunt will named its official school sport: out, my m om sent me too the begin at 11:00 p.m. on COll llterstrike! After many years doctor for some ointment. H e Easter Sunday and will of debate, the decision did not said that if I kept this addictive continue untit midnight. come lightl y for the GC commil behavior up then my eyes could The eggs will be camou tee. Several sports were consid be permanently damaged, Doc· flaged and some even in ered for this prestigious honor tor, smoc tor .. , what does he clude special prizes. Be but onl y one could go home with know? He limited my usages to sure to not mistake the the gold, a nd that 0 ne group two hours every other day, but goose eggs for the Easter was the Cyber Cafe Garners. that doesn' t stop me. eggs, they also enclose With their heads held high and NS: So you admit that you have become addicted? special prizes. See the with pride in their heans they Easter Bunny for more have claimed the GC c ampus SS: Oh yeah, over Christmas details. with this triumphant victory. The holidays I went through major Gamers leader and spokesperson withdrawals. I slaned sh aking Game Room hosts Shannon S met with and havi ng uncontrollable out· Jenga Tournament me aftcr th is announcement burs ts of "Bang bung" and A Jenga tournament will went public. "Take thai you conununist." .So be held on April 12 at NS: Sohowdoesi t feel to The new official sporl of Gainesville College will mom and dad had to allow me to ha ve this great honor bestowed play. I g uess that's when I h it noon. Sign up in the game now be Counterstrike. Players of the game were upon you and your followers? rock bottom. But luckily GC only room and Jenga blocks will overjoyed to learn the news. From now until the be provided for those who SS: It's a wonderful feeling closes down on Sunday, which participate. Be sure if Natalie, words can not express end of the semester, Counterstrike players in the gives me six straight days to you're under the age of 18 the gratitude and joy thai I am Cyber Cafe will be hosting tutorial sessions save up. to sign a waver before fec ling, available to all GC students, faculty and staff in N5: It sounds I ike you have taking part. NS: Well. fo r those who have more of an obsession rather than been living under a rock for the preparation for the Cyber Games, to be held in an addicti on? early fall. Tutorial sessions will be a little pricey. Geese Bowling last few years, what is 55: Naw, I wou ldn't say that. Cancelled Due to CO llllter:urike? but vel)! helpful for students who want to become Gel ofT my computer you freak Lack of Willing Geese SS: I can '( imagine anyone not the top gamers. For more information contact before I get out my real gun! SOrry students, but due to knowing the joy and excitement the gamer leader and spokesperson Shannon. N5: How do your parents re· the lack of willi ng geese that COlillterstrike brings, but act to this game? No I' m sorry to to participate in the goose fo r me CO l/merl'trike is a reli this lifestyle? bowling event, geese gion, not just a computer game. right when my grades st art ing several have raised to my atten 5S: AI first, it w as hard f or bowling is cancelled until And now I his so-called g ame, falling. Weird, huh? I guess I ti on are the health risks. Are their them 10 understand my passion. further notice, All com· more like a lifestyle, will be the needed something t o occupy any medical hazards that are con But now that it has become the plaints should be taken up official game forall ofGainesv ille my time instead of studying and nec ted w ith playing official sporl of the school lhat with Gus the Goose, the College. going to class. Coul/lerslrike or just the blank I attend, they have no objec. official mascot of GC. NS: How did you and your NS: Some say you guys have staring at the computers all day? lions to it. Counlerstrike and I fo ll owers first discover turned the C yber Cafe i nto a SS: Besides the cramped fin have a special bond, we recently CO l/llterl'trike? cufd what is your response to gers and blurred vision, not reo set our wedding date for some SS: Well, I like to say Ihat it tha t? ally. I mean, there was that one time inMay, so this is more than found us. just like the shits find SS: People always mistake us time when \\'C all came down with a game for me, I plan on making ya after eating at Taco Bell. for a cult. We reall y try to keep that weird rash from sitting to COlltlterstrike a permanenl fix· NS: That's a disgusti ng way the sacrifices to a bare minimwn. long, but that wasn't reall y haz ture in my life. to put il. So is t hat when y ou Every since Ihal whole m essy ardous. Wi th that said, I had no need started playing it religiously, or goose incident, people ha ve NS: So what do you plan on for the interview to continue. did it take a while to reall y hook been turning up their noses to doing with the blurred vision and Not o nl y was I scared for Shan you in? us. cramped fingers? Have you seen non but I am now terrified for SS: I guess I started playing it NS: Anotherbig question thai a doctor? ex:: - ~ 'oJ ."'" BRIEFS Student Activities to Offer Goose Poop Bingo New COurse 0_ Teh hum4ni7i3s By Dustonia Call annual Goosepoop Bingo. get green tires does not count. to acknowledge. that it's not al dJp4r7m3n7, in Staff Writer "During the third week ofApri l, The winning specimen wi ll be ways easy to wait for a line of 4ss0d47iOn wi7h teh dcal6424Ogc.peachnet.edu for an entry fee ofS5, each SlU subject to sampling and testing, waddling webfoots to cross the dlmpu70r sd3nc3 dent will receive a magnetic de and any found not to be of road when you're five minutes Students still feeling a budget d3p4r7m3n7,4nnOunc3 cal which may be anached any goose-origin will result in a re late for class, and our guests of crunch from their recent spring 4 n3w cOurs3 in h4XOr where on their car. The first SlU duction of the prize by one Ihird honor do make running across break debauchery, take heart. sp34k. If yOu c4n 734r dent to call the number listed on the total amount of the award. our lush green lawns to get to Someone feels sorry for you. and yOurs3lf 4w4y frOm yOur the decal and be confirmed to Adding an additional layer of that class a little more exciting, they work in the Office orCam COun70,,7rik3 g4m3, have somewhere on their car an excitement to the game, Stemey especially on dress-shoe day. pus Improvements. According cOn74c7 teh Hum4ni7i3s undisturbed gooey gifl from the indicates that a powerball-goose Fo r all th e good things our to department head Ned Stemey, D3p7 fOr mOr3 infO. geese wins lUition and books fo r will also be used. "A fifty dollar goose-friends do for us, there are "Gainesville College has a long a semester, courtesy of the Of cash bonus also will be included certainly some drawbacks. Our standing tradition of being a rest Meeting Canoelled fice of Campus Improvements," if either the splendid splat is ac contest seeks to make those little area for waywa rd waterfowl. The Apathy Oub meeting, says S terney. tually on the decal itself, or the marks in the negative colunm a This spring, before they all fly to scheduled for Thursday, Certain additional rules do ap powerful poopie is a biproduct bit more bearable." cooler climes, il is our intention has been cancelled due to ply. Any token of goose love of the official bingo mascot to both recognize them for what - all together now - LAO< found to be smeared or other who is currently under quaran they add to our campus, and to VIsit the Office of Campus OF INTEREST! Badump wise manipulated is a utomati tine and being fed a diet of black reward s ludents for I heir pa Improvements to get your bump! cally disqualified. Geese may not berries. tience in dealing with our fealb Goosepoop game piece for be lured in any way. Cars may Asked his reasoning for de ered friends. Therefore, it is my a chance to win tuition Book store to not be parked on campus over veloping such a contest, Stemey pleasure to announce GC's first and book money. Lower Prices night. Driving over a patch to responds, "We feel it's important To accommodate greater student growth, the book store will be lowering their prices. Price breaks should begin in Squirrels, Geese and Seagulls six to ten years. GoFlgure. •• Compete for GC Mascotship Further evidence of the dumbing-down of By Blake Duncan not pretentious a bout it," said two seagulls bullying a goose in Campus security also decries America: The Journal of News Editor one student, who then added, the lower parking lot. This has the current state ofaffairs , claim. Irresponsible Statistics [email protected] "It's a horrible silUation; I saw really gOllen oul ofhand." ing that they will be calling in reports that the majority the Hall County Department of of Americans do not un A campus-wide electronic Anima lAfTairs if the situation is derstand the basics of vote is planned for Apri116 to exacerbated. transformationally analytic decide the campus mascot The flock of seagulls are not and algebraic topology of In the course of Gaines ville the only group band-standing to locally Euclidean param College's history, the goose has become GC's mascot. When the eterization of infinitely dif been the unofficial mascot. Re gulls announced Ihat they ferentiable Riemannian cently, however, new challeng would challenge the geese in the manifolds. ers have appeared. With Lake electronic vote, t he squirrels Lanier reaching full pool for the came out in great numbers. Sacrifice to be Held first time s inee 1998, seagulls Squirrels have long been a main The Pagans dub will be have made their relUrn to the stay of the GC campus, and fi saCrificing a virgin on the Gainesv ille-Hall County area, nally are getting the attention outdoor volleyball court and as such have begun a cam they have sought for so long. beside the Student Center paign 10 become the unofficial "I'm behind the squirrels in on Friday April 9 - assum mascot. this one," another student ing they can find one. The geese became the unoffi claimed. "The geese crap every cial mascot in 1997, at a time where and the seagulls ate just Umbrage to be Taken when gas prices were at least 20 too dang annoying. Plus, you The Society of Humorless cents cheaper a ga llon, a new car don't get fined if you run over a Jerks will be taking um was only $ 15,000 (depending on squirrel.' ~ brage in front of the Ad the make and model) and Bill A spokesperson for the squir ministration Building f!IIf!:fY Clinton was President. The rels stated that her group did not day for the next week. seagulls claim that if they a re want to be left out in this vote, elected, their first push will be because they are a vital part of to make the mascotship official, this campus, and come April 16 and to gain an office in the Ad they w ill be recognized as the ministration building. Who will win the battle to become the unofficial unofficial mascot. The squirrel 'The geese are the establish platfonn is one of oak and birch. ment of this school, and they're GC mascot? . - PageZ BRIEFS Parking Deck to Replace Student Center ScIentists PoInt out DyIng as LeacUng By Blake Duncan This will be the most exten Cause of Oath News Editor sive rebuilding project GC has bdunS6SJOgc.peachnet.edu Wor1ctwIde undertaken since installing the Scientists at the Medical As most students w ill say, underground warehouse under University of libya claim parking has become a se rious the soccer field. As for tuilion that, after years of re· problem at Gainesville College. and student aClivity fees, both search, dying has been Campus Security, along with the will go up, the administration proven to cause death in Hall County Zoning Committee office claims. Tuition for in-state 100 percent of the re· and the Board of Regents have studenlS will rise from roughly ported cases. Signs of devised a solution to this over· S700 to around S4,5OO, and stu dying include: cold body bearing problem. dent activity fees will go from rigor mortis, temperature, "During the summer and fa ll $3910$390. lack of responsiveness, semesters of 2003, the Univer· "The parking deck is the most etc. sit y System wi ll be tearing down imporlant thing for us at the the Student Center and the Mu moment. Once we get that built Franz ferdinand Found sic building in order to erect a we can open up the field on the Alive, World War I four-story parking deck over the -.... west side of campus for devel· a Mistake existing parking lot," said a Orange Julius and Sbarro have contacted the opment. Orange Julius and Historians in the Balkans Board of Regents spokesper school to open up shops once the parking Sbarro have already contacted have found Franz son. deck and other new additions are made. us about o pe ning up s ho ps Ferdinand, the famed Other building projects that there," said the same Board of Ardlduke of Austria, alive are expected to las t for two years Regents spokesperson. expanded and I umed into one Campus Security is looking and running a small bed or more will increase GC's stu Student GovemmentAssocia· and breakfast In southwest building with the Administration forward to these changes. stal lion and the Campus Acti vities dent capacity t 0 over 15,000. Offices. The Science Building ing that it will allow the depart. serbia. Eastern Europe Academic 11 will see additions Board will be working hand-in apologized for WWI at a will gain three new n·oors and a ment to expand dnd add another Ihat will add a second and third hand with the Board of Regents helipad so that helicopters can security personnel to the pay· news conference in noor, along with a larger court 45 to make sure that students do transport injured chemistry stu roli, along with 30 new trucks Belgrade. yard area. Academic 111 will be not feel the rise in tuition and dents 10 local hospitals. and a van or two. fees is not appreciated. Would You Believe She'slD3? Archaeologists and other Goose Sues Student for Hit and Run assorted scientists have By Blake Duncan PETA member could not be discovered the corpse of News Editor reached for comment, but did re singer/actress Oler under bdunS6SJ@gc. peachnet.edu lease a statement saying that his! roughly 100 years worth her g roup would be willing to r:I make-up build-up. ~ During an afternoon news forgive the student who maimed Iywoocl mourned and re conference on Feb. 28, the goose if that person agreed Joiced the report. Gainesville College security of to become a level five vegan and ficers announced that a member not eat anything that casts a Snideness Level ofGC's unofficial mascot group, shadow. Reaches A11-TIme High the Geese. was suing a student An unnamed a nd totally un The Compass Staff has at the school for pain and suf confirmed Oakwood police reported that their own fering innicted by a hit ""i nd run source claimed that the student accidcnt two weeks b6fore. snideness level har who perpetrated the crime would reached a record high. The incident happer1'ed on remain anonymous throughout Feb. 16, al roughly 2:15 p.m.. the course of the investigation, Martha Burk To Hold when the student, driving a four after which they would become 'Nude' Protests wheeled unleaded gas-powered the object of mass amounts of Martha Burk held a press vehicle. struck the goose at the ridicule. conference to announce campus's main entrance. Au The goose in question will be that the protests her thorities responded witllin two undergoing therapy and treat· group would hold during hours of the event. ment at South Hall Veterinary the Masters tournament The i nvestigalion began al Clinic for injuries ranging from v.oold be nude. The press most immediately after Ihe inci two broken wings to a fractured corps fled in terror, chaos dent 0 ccurred. A GC Sl udent bill. However, the goose is cur ensued. A of Pop- who is a memberofPETA's mili· box Th e goose was unable to schedule a rentl y in an upper-body cast and Tarts was stolen from Au· tant wing phoned the Hall photograph session, so we bring you this confined to a miniature wheel· gusta grocery store dur· County Department of Animal totally unrelated picture of Elmo. But isn1 he chair. The Veterinary Clinic says ing the riot. Affairs, who in tum contacted the goose will be in rehabilita the Georgia Slate Department of just so cute and furry. Don1 you just want to tion for at least t he next three Anima l Affairs. who in tum con cuddle him? months, while the student faces tacted the Oakwood police. The a fineofS400 andjail time. P. O. BOX 1358 The Gainesville College Student Newspaper GAlNESvJu.E. GA. oceCll. ,,,,,, THE~CO PASS [email protected] April '6, 2003 BurktoHold eck be Nude Win Free Tuition Protests and Books with New at EPOOP BINGO " f' l. " ,,' __""' Page3 .. ' " ,1 .. n " l' ...